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#i love Carson <3 could that be enough? i don’t know. it doesn’t feel like enough I need the other characters in the show to legit care
mrburnsnuclearpussy · 3 months
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I’m making myself feel sick by getting sad about Carson
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itssoinevitable · 1 year
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Hiii 👋 I just wanted to say I’ve been a fan of your blog since the good ole Downton Days and I’m so chuffed you’re a ACGAS fan too! Tbf right now the fandom is super down in the dumps (me included). How are you remaining so positive since Audrey x Gerald development in the Christmas Special?
Hi Anon! Thanks for your message, and happy holidays! So nice to hear from our old Downton Abbey crew again, I think a lot of us migrated here.
To be honest, there are a few reasons I’m not worried. (Sorry, it’s long).
1) Because I honestly love Siegfried and Audrey as friends and surrogate family. Their bond is special and beautiful, whether or not it ever becomes romantic. (Although I hope it does). They are life partners, involved in all the most important parts of each other’s lives. They have coparented Tristan (and James and Jess), they’re each other’s confidant and source of comfort. That’s special in and of itself.
2) Because I actually think they’re playing the (really, really) long game with them. I could be wrong, but that seems to be what the writers are doing. It seems quite intentional. 3 years on screen together may seem a while for some, and I suppose she’s been his housekeeper for around 7 years so it feels like ages. But imo, the best slow burns imo are the ones where you’re never quite sure if they will or won’t. It’s the little crumbs they leave scattered here and there, it’s the longing looks and angsty build up that makes it so delicious tbh. I just hope they get renewed for enough seasons to see it through. (Plus I am a Carson & Mrs Hughes fan, so 3 seasons doesn’t feel that long! Lol)
3) And lastly, because I don’t actually think they’re ready to be together yet. They’re still in the process of getting there.
Siegfried has probably had to longest way to go, in terms of being emotionally ready to realise, admit and accept that he has feelings for his housekeeper. In Season 1, he opened himself up to intimacy and the possibility of love again. He did that with Dorothy and then Diana, (although who knows why she’s been such a non-entity this last season. Maybe the actress wasn’t available?) And now, at the end of S3, he literally just resolved one of his biggest character arcs - his complex relationship and feelings for Tristan (and even then, only with a lot of encouragement and support from Audrey). He’s emotionally levelled up.
Now, I think it’s Audrey’s turn. Gerald befriending her/ pursuing her has allowed her to imagine she could be with someone again, after leaving her husband. It helps her relationship with Edward is also on the mend, since that’s been a source of so much guilt and pain for her. As for her feelings toward Gerald, they do seem to have deepened somewhat suddenly. I know some people said it felt very out of blue considering she had friendzoned him. But maybe she liked him all along and simply didn’t feel she could be more than friends, much as she wanted to. Or maybe it was brought on by the war, and him moving away. Either way, I think he’s a good man, simple and uncomplicated, which is just what she needs as she’s testing the waters of romance again. I think he’s also serving as a catalyst for Siegfried to realise the depth of his feelings for Audrey, which is v exciting imo.
Siegfried is also a good man, but things with him are as ever, more complicated. Their status as employer and employee, and long time friends also raises the stakes a lot more. Considering she’s a lot more self-aware, I think Mrs Hall knows she might have certain feelings for Siegfried (seemed a bit disapproving / jealous of his relationships) but I don’t think she has considered it could go anywhere. I feel that this budding relationship with Gerald will be pivotal in a shift between them. It might motivate her to get her divorce from Mr Hall, and resolve that source of pain from her past, too.
TL;DR All that said, I think they’re getting where to need to be, and I think we should enjoy the journey. It’ll be all the more sweet if and when it happens.
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metamorphesque · 3 years
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hi, thank you for you!
could you please recommend some of your favourite poems/poets? something powerful
xo
Thank you, lovely 🌼
1. Ocean Vuong (honestly, all of his poems are heart-wrenching)
Headfirst
Stupid boy.
You can get lost in every book
but you’ll never forget yourself
the way god forgets
his hands.
Homewrecker
Because the year is a distance
we’ve traveled in circles. Which is to say: this is how
we danced: alone in sleeping bodies. Which is to say:
this is how we loved: a knife on the tongue turning
into a tongue.
Because it's summer
you say thank you thank you thank you
because you haven’t learned the purpose
of forgive me because that’s what you say
when a stranger steps out of summer
& offers you another hour to live
Seventh circle of Earth
As if my finger, / tracing your collarbone / behind closed doors, / was
enough / to erase myself. To forget / we built this house knowing / it
won’t last. How / does anyone stop / regret / without cutting / off his
hands? /
On Earth we're briefly gorgeous
You, pushing your body into the river
only to be left with yourself—
stay.
To my father / to my future son
Use it to prove how the stars
were always what we knew
they were: the exit wounds
of every misfired word.
Notebook Fragments
God must be a season, grandma said, looking out at the blizzard
drowning
her garden.
2. Richard Siken
Portrait of Fryderyk in Shifting Light by Richard Siken
What can you know about a person? They shift
in the light. You can’t light up all sides at once. Add
a second light and you get a second darkness, it’s only
fair. He is looking at the wall and I am looking at his
looking.
The Language of the Birds
A man had two birds in his head—not in his throat, not in his chest—and the birds would sing all day never stopping. The man thought to himself, One of these birds is not my bird. The birds agreed.
Logic
There's a dream in the
space between the hammer and the nail: the dream of
about-to-be-hit, which is a bad dream, but the nail will
take the hit if it gets to sleep inside the wood forever.
The field of rooms and halls
I put my sadness in a box. The box went soft and wet and weak at the bottom. I called it Thursday. Today is Sunday. The town is empty.
Landscape with a Blur of Conquerors
It should be enough. To make something
beautiful should be enough. It isn’t. It should be
3. Charles Bukowski
Raw with love
little dark girl with kind eyes
you have no
knife. the knife is
mine and I won't use it
yet.
The Crunch
we forget the terror of one person
aching in one room
alone
unkissed
untouched
cut off
watering a plant alone
without a telephone that would never
ring
anyway.
Bluebird
we forget the terror of one person
aching in one room
alone
unkissed
untouched
cut off
watering a plant alone
without a telephone that would never
ring
anyway.
The Genius of the Crowd
but there is genius in their hatred
there is enough genius in their hatred to kill you
to kill anybody
not wanting solitude
not understanding solitude
they will attempt to destroy anything
that differs from their own
The Laughing Heart
Your life is your life
Don’t let it be clubbed into dank submission.
Be on the watch.
There are ways out.
There is a light somewhere.
It may not be much light but
It beats the darkness.
4. Anne Carson
The Glass Essay
You remember too much,
my mother said to me recently.
Why hold onto all that? And I said,
Where can I put it down?
Red Doc
To feel anything deranges you. To be seen feeling anything strips you naked. In the grip of it, pleasure or pain doesn't matter.
5. Rainer Maria Rilke (but mainly in German)
Extinguish Thou My Eyes (Lösch mir die Augen aus)
Extinguish Thou my eyes:I still can see Thee, deprive my ears of sound:I still can hear Thee, and without feet I still can come to Thee, and without voice I still can call to Thee.
I find you (Ich finde dich)
I find you in all these things: all that is good in me and in my brothers, like a tiny seed you bask in the sun and in the vastness you greatly give of yourself
6. Joseph Brodsky (but mainly in Russian)
Don't leave the room, don't make a mistake ( Не выходи из комнаты, не совершай ошибку.)
Don’t leave your room, don’t commit that fateful mistake. Why risk the sun? Just settle back at home and smoke. Outside’s absurd, especially that whoop of joy, you’ve made it to the lavatory--now head back straight away!
A Song
It's evening, the sun is setting; boys shout and gulls are crying. What's the point of forgetting if it's followed by dying?
7. Marina Tsvetaeva (in Russian)
I am happy simply living
I am happy living simply: like a clock, or a calendar. Worldly pilgrim, thin, wise—as any creature.
Where does this tenderness come from?
Where does this tenderness come from? And what will I do with it? Young stranger, poet, wandering through town, you and your eyelashes—longer than anyone’s.
8. Paul Verlaine
Les sanglots longs Des violons De l'automne Blessent mon cœur D'une langueur Monotone.
The long sobs Of violins Of autumn Wound my heart With a monotonous Languor.
9. Vahan Teryan (in Armenian)
My mother’s hands
My mother's hands were tapered slim like candles that might burst in flame. My mother's voice was like a balm soothing each pain, calling each name.
Carousel
In that far-off world the song I sang was one we all knew: "I love you but you don't love me." How banal and predictable. Now.
10. Paruyr Sevak (in Armenian)
Without words
I know what has changed, my dear, It’s always like that, When someone insane and crazy like me, Opens his heart without words To someone modest and shy like you…
When i was busy on Mars
When I was busy farming on Mars, Sitting dreamily in my small city room, My poor door suddenly underwent a formidable ordeal: You were knocking.
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jiilys · 3 years
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would u help me out for a second. im in the mood to write for the first time, and i think your style is beautiful. sitting down n actually trying though, im stuck as fuck! i’m realizing that in your dialogue/scenes you’ve got a lot of Little Things. little tiny elements that are subtle & just enough. how are you deciding that lily is building a house of cards at the moment or sirius is sitting in a tree or whatever during a given scene? how do you come up with those ideas for dialogue that are so silly & real & sneakily tender? do you know where it’s going when you begin? any advice for just… starting something?
ps: i appreciate you. you make it look easy & that’s very very cool
This is a lovely question!! Sorry it took me so long to get to it, I didn’t want to get it wrong. Also I’ve included some examples to try and explain what I mean in practise, but it also comes off rather like plugging. tragically this is unavoidable. Anyway, all that being said I have no idea how to advise you about dialogue and coming up with it, I think just listening to people talk helps. Don’t forget contractions, and when in doubt always trust the reader to keep up, real people don’t say perfect or even grammatically correct sentences a lot of the time. We also cut each other off all the time, especially when we’re trying to be funny. Like, here’s an example from warm front:
“He’s not even two. He probably would have thought it was, like, having a lie down or something.”
Harry was laughing now, “A lie down?”
“Yeah, a spontaneous, truck-induced–“
“–Permanent–“ “
–Permanent, lie-down. I’m almost jealous now actually.”
Another thing, but people say um and like or can't speak or cut themselves off, especially when they’re nervous. James when Lily says she loves him for the first time: ‘“Wow,” He breathed, “I’m– wow.” He put both hands on her cheeks and kissed her crazy, abruptly, dumbly. Her head spun.’ He can’t even speak! Dumb boy.
I think natural dialogue sometimes just requires you to read it aloud, which is very embarrassing but ultimately quite useful in trying to figure out whether something sounds normal or not. Use casual words, and try not to go dictionary hunting: if you cant think of the word chances are your character can’t either
In terms of concepts I have no idea, but I do have a few tips. I write all my short one-shots in one document (its called ‘just bad’ lmao) so its easy to start something, write a few lines, and then if it doesnt work just start a new concept, but still have all the old stuff handy. if you feel like you’ve written yourself into a corner its probably because you took a wrong turn earlier, so its just a matter of going back up and figuring out where you turned onto the dead end, or where a line could be funnier and/or sadder and/or more meaningful. Sometimes the bare bones of a decent line is there but you have to work it a little.
In this harry/ginny thing where harry is apologising for all the attention and ginny brushes him off she says:
“It’s nothing,” her voice, all force, “Anyway, it’s more funny than annoying.”
The response went through a few drafts, all variations on the same thing:
(1) “You’re funnier.” [too short, doesn’t make sense, and not really that funny. unholy trinity]
(2) “You make it funny.” Harry said, looking at her for real, “It’s not– you make it like that.” [this could work! I have no idea why I cut this, I think I forgot abt it lmao]
(3) “You’re the funniest person I know, Harry said, sincerely, and Ginny felt her heartbeat all through her, “You make it funny.” [jumping from ‘its more funny than annoying’ to getting this sincere out of nowhere is a little much, even for harry who is famously whipped]
I ended up going with this:
“It’s nothing,” her voice, all force, “Anyway, it’s more funny than annoying.”
“You’re funny.” Harry said, looking at her for real, flustered, “I mean– you make it funny. That’s all you.”
It follows the flow of the conversation and I think the way he says it, ‘you’re funny’ like its obvious, and then being like oh fuck and over-explaining it stumbling a little “I mean– you make it funny. That’s all you.”. You know when you like someone and you say something that gives you away before you can stop yourself? I wanted it to sound like that. Just gotta keep in mind how people behave, we are so stupid a lot of the time, we give ourselves away.
The thing about short stuff i find is implying a lot of history without actually describing a lot of it. I normally do this by having memories come up as almost shards, one second of feeling. You know when you’re in a conversation with someone and they mention someone or a past event, and it rises to the top of your brain, but only for a second? i find sometimes when you’re reading stuff people will try and replay entire memories or events mid-conversation, which is not something you do when you think. You don’t need to replay it beat by beat, you were there! This sounds vague as hell so I’ll try and show you what I mean:
From good crimes: “Petunia is engaged.” Lily’s voice, raw and wrong, “To Vernon. Eliza Hunt told me at the supermarket.” Sudden flashes of Petunia, the only time he’d ever met her, sat in the back of Lily’s twenty-first, pinched and whispering. “Whose Eliza Hunt?” This seems as good a thing to say as any.
pretty on the nose (the phrase ‘sudden flashes’ is pretty so i'll allow it from past me). But see how you don’t need to know how Petunia didnt talk to anyone, how she left early, how she was the odd one out: you don’t need to read all that, you already know because she was sat in the back and because pinched is such a mean verb, spiteful and sharp, you can already imagine how the evening went without me saying so
From my proposal take, after Sirius finds out they’re engaged: Sirius’ grip on his shoulder tightened for one second, still grinning, and James knew what he meant. “I know.” He said, because only Sirius had been there for all of it, when they were fifteen, drunk on Firewhiskey for the first time and James had said I think I’ve fucked it, I think I’ve fucked it but I like her for real.
you don’t need a description of the whole night, what party they were at, who they were with, what they were talking about: the important bit is that Sirius was the first person he told, and that they’re both remembering that at the same moment because they’re soulmates lmao. You know when something big happens for a friend and you feel so full of pride & love that you feel like you’ll burst into confetti?? this needed to feel like that, and you only need a flash for it
I feel like I’ve sort of strayed off from what you asked me, which is really advice on how to start something. I normally start with a line, usually of dialogue, and then try and build from there because dialogue is my thing. You might have a different thing! Some people write from concepts or locations, or an image. i might start with one or a few lines of dialogue, write them down, and then try to build from there. For example for the proposal thing I started from james just saying “Marry me”, which I find more romantic than ‘will you marry me’, purely because it sounds like he simply couldn’t stop himself from saying it, like it rushed out. Another example, this thing started from just “don’t be mad at me” “okay” James agreed instantly, because he is such a sucker for her.
When I write I don’t normally know where I’m going! I normally set out to write something I think is vaguely funny and evokes An Emotion, and then I just play around with stuff until I get there. when I write certain stuff and I have scenes in mind, stuff I want to happen, but I find that if I try to plot it to tightly its not exciting to work on, because sometimes you write a good line by accident, that you hadn’t thought of when you sat down, and you surprise yourself. That is a really nice feeling! i want to maximise that feeling.
'What I mostly try to remember is that writing something down, anything down, is useful. Sometimes you write for a whole night and dont get anything useable, but its like clearing pipes. Sometimes you have to flush through shit to get to the good bits. All the rough stuff, the things you don’t like or didn’t work, you wrote to get you to the stuff that did work. All of the bad shit got you here! It wasn’t a waste, you were working to find the good thing
If I had any tips its just the usual stuff, read! It is annoying how much that helps. Also, and I know this may make you shudder, but reading poetry is useful just because in no other literary or media form is language so important. In comics you have pictures, in novels you have plot and character, in film you all that and cinematography, but in poetry you live and die by how good the words are. If you want recs here’s my poem roundup tag, that I do sometimes, or if you want something just now read this by Anne Carson, which uses words like ‘smashing’, ‘boatwash’, and ‘green’ in the best way possible. Also it has these lines: “Recently having learned to recognize the type of tree called sycamore, / I see them in any forest— / the ones that look harrowed, / in shreds, but / go also / straight up into life,”
I mean, think of a sharper image than that?? It’s not possible. Just try remember to stay true to your characters and that in real life, the little stuff is the big stuff. Little things the people around you do normally show they care more than big speeches, and if you want to show love that’s how to make it feel lived in. You want to build a world! the little stuff is usually the world. Take some from your own or dream the ones you wish you had.
This truly was a very kind message and I’m so grateful you like my stuff, I hope any of this was even half-useful, although now reading it back it is borderline nonsensical. I’m going to bed now, good luck with the writing, and don’t forget to send it to me!!
caro xoxo
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hyuckssunchip · 3 years
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Blooming Pt. 1
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Pairings: Jisung x Reader, ft. nct dream, lucas (honorary member of dream)
Words: 7.5K
Warnings: Language (there is almost always language in my writings), angst, fluff
Synopsis:
Love isn’t as easy as it seems, Park Jisung is an advocate of that. A blooming relationship that has prematurely ceased can be re-sparked years later, or can it? Will Jisung be able to overcome his fears in order to succeed in what he deems love?
Part 1 | Part 2 
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Freshman Yr.
Hey Jisung,
I know that this is kinda random and I only have the guts to do this now because I probably won’t see you again but here goes. I think you are a really sweet and cool guy and I wish I had gotten to know you better, probably because I had a big crush on you... I just thought I would send this to you because I know it’s nice to know and it’s probably a little bit of a confidence booster. (I also kinda wanted to get this off my chest). Sorry for the essay and you don’t have to respond to this if it’s awkward … I hope you stay safe especially with what’s going on right now 
You held your breath, panicking at the loading sign on your phone. Welp, it was too late now.
You were pacing back and forth in your living room, nail very much in your mouth as you bit them anxiously.
“I just sent it.” You breathed out, “Oh my god, I just sent it.” At this point you were nearly in tears you were so nervous.
“That’s good. It’s like one a.m. though, so don’t be too worried if he doesn’t answer right away.” You nodded into the receiver, and although your best friend couldn’t see you, she still understood your silence.
You had called your best friend earlier to ask for her advice about the guy you had told her about months ago. It was the last quarter of school for this year and you finally had the courage to confess to him. 
Your best friend Megan was a little bit more experienced than you and she laughed when you had told her you wrote drafts, and you promptly sent it to her.
“He’s not writing back.” You told her, staring intently at the screen, refreshing it every few seconds as if that would make him answer. 
“Well of course not, you literally sent it ten seconds ago. Besides I told you, it’s late, he might just reply in the morning.” She sighed at your panicked state.
“Oh my god! He read it.” You bit your lip, staring at the numbers below your text.
“Oh.” She giggled, “Cute, he has read receipts on like you.” 
You barely had time to comprehend what she had said when you gasped out, “Oh my god. He’s typing, he’s typing! There’s bubbles.”
She laughed, “Wow, that was fast.”
You weren’t exactly paying attention to her, focused very much on the bubbles that were still there. Then suddenly they stopped.
“They stopped.” You felt the need to relay everything to her.
“That’s fine, he’s probably just reading over it.” You nodded, trying to convince yourself. But you couldn’t because nothing ever came. It was almost 25 minutes later that you heard the familiar ding of your phone.
Hey Y/N! thanks for letting me know, it really is not easy but rip coronavirus really is kinda messing with everything. i think you’re a really nice person and if circumstances would have allowed, i would have wanted to get to know you more too. everything is kinda hectic rn and i wish you the besttt and stay safe too!!
Immediately you called Megan again. “It doesn’t look good…Listen to what he said.” You read the text, heart dropping with every word you read.
“What are you talking about? That’s a good thing. Y/N he said he wants to get to know you better too. That’s sweet. I think he’s just keeping it open though, cause there’s not much you guys can do anyways.”
“Yeah.” You tried to not let out how dejected you were, but it was clear to her.
“Hey don’t worry about it. If he doesn’t like you then he’s not worth worrying over.”
“Right.” You pouted despite what she said making sense. “Look I’ll call you later, I’ve got to go now.”
“Okay, Y/N, don’t stress too much about it, okay?”
You hummed back, mumbling out your goodbyes.
The moment you hung up, you threw your phone on the bed, falling next to it. You sighed, trying not to overthink everything.
That’s why you confessed now, so that if you were so badly rejected, you wouldn’t have to see him again. Right?
You groaned, closing your eyes, hoping that sleep would make you feel better. Or perhaps you would wake up and find that this was all a dream. 
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You woke up and of course with habit, the first thing you did was look over at your phone. You rubbed the sleep out of your eyes, grinning at the screen. 
You weren’t thrilled that it was in reality a dream, but on the other hand things had become very real very fast.
NOTIFICATION
Park Jisung            5:18 a.m.
oh, are you still going back to school next year?
You smiled at the text, heart immediately choosing to beat faster than you would’ve liked. With a glance at the clock you realized it was 8:07 a.m. and you couldn’t stop yourself from replying the moment you saw it.
yeah, i’m planning on living off campus tho… are you gonna live off campus too?
You panicked, staring at the screen, knowing damn well that he wasn’t about to reply at 8 in the morning. You had to restrain yourself from calling your best friend that very moment, you were in a happy mood and waking her up would not keep that.
The entire day you were buzzing, constantly checking your phone for new notifications. For the first time you understood what phantom texts felt like. Every couple of minutes you were sure that you felt a text, but alas it was your imagination. 
It wasn’t until 4 p.m. when a real text came through, ringing loud and clear. You had turned your ringer on and off, making sure that it was working just in case.
yup! I’ll be living by the shopping complex in downtown. how about you?
Restraint was not easy for you, and you replied after a few moments passed. Megan had constantly told you to let at least a few minutes pass, but you couldn’t help it. Besides, read receipts were not in your favor.
Conversation seemed to come really easy to you, and after an hour of texting non stop he said he had one more final to take.
You understood and immediately felt bad, realizing that you had taken up precious study time for him. You wished him good luck and spent the rest of the night relaying every detail to Megan over the phone.
Little did you know that that conversation would be the last for a long time.
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3 months later
It was time for a break. And what better way was there than a small kickback with your best friends after midterms?
“I brought the good stuff.” You were startled, laying on the daybed of your other friend, Camille’s room. It was the perfect spot for a kickback. A couple hundred feet from the main house, and completely stocked with all that you needed. 
You sat up glancing at the armfuls of alcohol Megan had snagged, don’t ask how she got it.
You giggled at the thought, watching as Camille helped unload. “Let the games begin.”
“Truth or Dare Y/N?” You groaned, turning away from the both of them. 
“You know I hate this game.”
Megan didn’t let up. “Camille has a pond.” 
That was enough information for you. You took a glance out the window, noting that it was freezing outside. You were not taking a chance on her intentions. “Truth.”
“Boring.” She sang, but nevertheless had a question set. “Have you talked to that boy since the last time you called me about him?”
You grumbled to yourself, taking a shot and grimacing. “No.” 
“Why not?” Camille asked, reaching for the bottle still in your hand.
You rolled your eyes. “I don’t know, I’m too much of a coward to text him now. But he could text me first too you know. Especially cause I took the first jump. It’s probably because he doesn’t like me.”
You sighed, staring at the bottle again, tempted to take another shot.
“I’m sure that’s not the case.” You missed the look Megan shot Camille, already coming up with a new idea.
In the end you caved, choosing that perhaps another shot could bring you happiness. But it just burned your throat.
“Megan truth or dare?”
“Dare, duh.” You watched the proud look on her face.
“I dare you to… snapchat that dude that sent dick pics to fuck off.” Camille said, watching Megan’s face contort into delight.
“Hell yeah! It would be my pleasure.” She giggled, and you noticed that she was feeling the alcohol as well.
You felt the need to roll your eyes again.
“Done. And blocked.” She tossed her phone in the middle of the group with satisfaction.
“I don’t know why you just didn’t block him right after he sent them.” You commented, chewing on a gummy worm. 
She just shrugged, “I don’t know, it was kind of fun I guess. Anyways. Camille, truth or dare?”
“Truth.”
“Do you really only see Carson as a friend?” Camille sputtered at the question, spitting out a bit of juice.
“No, I see him as a brother. That’s disgusting, besides he’s dating Bailee.” She shook her head, working to clean up the mess.
“Doesn’t mean you can’t like him.” Megan muttered, before dropping it and turning back to you.
“Y/N truth or dare?”
“Truth.” You mumbled out, not really paying attention.
“Come on, do at least one dare. It’s not fun if you only answer truth.” She whined, pushing another cup of jungle juice towards you.
You hesitantly sniffed the cup before taking a sip. A moment of silence passed as they waited for you. You let out a deep sigh, “Fine, dare. What do you want?”
“I dare you to text him.”
You froze, you knew that’s what she was going to say, but you were so out of it that you let it slide.
“You know I can’t do that.” You answered, wide eyed.
“It’s a dare.” Megan nodded at the window, insinuating the punishment.
“No, I really can’t. I’ll give you my phone though, but I can’t do it.” You dug the phone out of your backpack and tossed it next to hers, which she grabbed immediately typing in your password that she had memorized.
“Deal. I’ll just start it, then you can keep the conversation going.” You waved her off, choosing to drown yourself in as much alcohol as you could in hopes of forgetting that this happened tomorrow morning.
“Done. I just sent hey, with like three y’s and a smiley face. Not the emoji though.” Your mouth dropped at her.
“That’s so not me though. You know I use emojis, and I don’t do the all, heyyyy thing. He’s gonna know.” She just shrugged, sliding the phone back to you.
You sighed, staring at the empty screen, the other two returning to the game.
But it was three minutes later when your phone dinged, a text from Jisung lighting up your screen.
“Is that him?” Camille asked, peeking over at the screen.
“Yeah. I don’t wanna read it though, you do it.” You pushed it away, pulling your knees into your chest.
“I got you.” Megan paused. “See. Guys like the hey thing. He did it back, I don’t know what you were talking about, he’s totally into you.”
You grinned, crawling forward to see for yourself. The phone dinged again seconds later.
“Ooh, that’s hot. I like it when a guy texts in multiple bubbles, it shows they just text you what they think. They’re not planning it out or anything.” Megan commented, already typing in a response for you.
You watched over her shoulder, glancing at Camille who was doing the same. 
“Is this good?” You just nodded back, sitting back on your heels to take a break.
“Oh, wow. That was fast. He texted back.” Although she sounded impressed, she frowned at the text.
“What? What is it?” You asked, panicking at her expression.
“Nothing. He’s just… dry. Was he always a dry texter?” She asked, handing the phone back to you.
“No? I don’t know, I didn’t think he was dry, we texted for like an hour straight that one time.” You mumbled, looking at the phone disappointed.
“Well he seems pretty dry to me. Maybe you should text him, maybe you were right, my texting was too different from yours.” You bit your lip and nodded, trying to come up with a response to him.
You didn’t know if it was because you were drunk, or that he could tell you were drunk, but while the conversation did get slightly better, he seemed dry to you as well. It was after twenty minutes of texting that you couldn’t keep the conversation any longer. You became frustrated at the dwindling conversation.
You had chosen to contact him again after three months of ghosting each other, and now he was making it difficult to carry a conversation. Maybe he really doesn’t like you. You felt your face heat up in embarrassment. Fine, you thought, you weren’t reaching out anymore. You didn’t want to be seen as pathetic, you could catch a hint. He just didn’t like you and was being nice. If he did actually like you, he could reach out to you.
This didn’t stop you from thinking about him for the month following the drunken incident. 
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2 years later  Junior Yr.
“I swear if you’re late for this one too, I’m not setting you up on anymore blind dates!” You winced at the sound of your roommate cursing at you.
“I’m going!” You yelled back, slipping out the front door before she had a chance to attack you again. 
You managed to close door without hearing what ever else she had in store for you. 
Your keys jangled as you quickly tried to lock the bright red door, giving it one last tug of reassurance when you turned on your heel to find your car.
“Oof!” A body collided with yours, you were partially, well mostly at fault. 
“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry. I should’ve paid more attention. It’s just, I was in a bit of a rush…” You trailed off, finally getting a good look at the other person’s face. “Jisung?”
He simply stared back with a blank look on his face, mouth hung slightly open. “Y/N?”
You hated how your heart quickened at the sound of your name from his lips. 
“I-I… wow…” You stuttered out, not quite able to act as natural as you had hoped. “Do you live here?”
“Uh… yeah, I live next door.” He pointed to your left, and when you followed his finger sure enough it was right next to your apartment. You missed the way that he looked you up and down, gulping at the sight of you in years. 
“Oh. Wow, what a coincidence, I guess.” You laughed out nervously, hands playing with your lanyard.
“Yeah.” He nodded back, not really making eye contact. Not that you were trying either.
“Well…”
“Yeah.”
There was an awkward silence between you two, and you cleared your throat to break some tension.
“I was actually on my way out, so… I’ve got to get going. But I’ll see you around.” You put on a fake smile that didn’t really reach your eyes, and shot him a wave before rushing off to your car. Once under the safety of your car, you sighed and tried to discreetly glance at the boy you hadn’t seen or thought of in years.
You shook your head, starting the ignition. It’s time to forget him, you told yourself, besides I’ve got a date waiting for me right now.
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It wasn’t until Jisung was positive you could no longer see him, having driven off minutes ago, that he threw his head back and let out the deep breath he didn’t know he was holding. The blush he had been so desperately holding out finally came over his face, as he felt the heat burn his ears.
He had just begun to forget about you, from time to time, pausing over your conversation stream. Although it was torture, every once in a while he would read back all the texts, hating the way that they abruptly stopped. On occasion, mostly when he was drunk, but there were times when he was sober, he would even type out a text but fail to send it.
Jisung was never the outgoing type, he envied those who were. Those that could just strike up a conversation and carry on like it was second nature. But it was hard for Jisung. It took work and energy, and sometimes he didn’t have that. It was stressful and scary to Jisung.
It was a godsend when you reached out to him years ago, claiming so boldly your feelings for him. He wasn’t going to admit it, but then he had asked for his friends help in responding. It was Mark’s wishy-washy personality that had unbeknowingly sent your mind in circles that night.
It was Haechan’s straight-forward nature that had forced him to text you at 5 a.m. the next morning. He was tired of hearing about Jisung’s concerns as to why you didn’t reply earlier, complaining that if he was that worried just text her.
So he did.
And it worked. 
It worked so well. That hour he had spent texting you had butterflies dancing in his belly. He had never felt happier or more connected than at that moment. It wasn’t until his alarm rang, notifying him that he had five minutes until his last final did he stop smiling.
He was more than disappointed when nothing came out of the conversation. Of course he knew that it wasn’t just your fault, after all he had a phone, he could text you too.
And he tried, he really did. Multiple times. But every text he drafted was soon deleted and so the conversation ran dry. That was until three months later, May 16th.
But you always seemed to catch him at a bad time. It was Saturday, but his professor had given him an extension on his paper and it was due at midnight.
Your first text came at 10:58 p.m. 
It took all he had not to answer the text, and eventually he did cave. But as much as he wanted to focus on you he couldn’t, after all he had begged his professor to extend his deadline, he had to finish this. 
Maybe that’s why this time you didn’t seem so responsive. Maybe that’s why this time it only took twenty minutes for the conversation to end.
Maybe that’s why, after it took him forty-five minutes to respond to your last text, you left him on read.
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“What’s with the long face dude?” His best friend, and housemate asked, slapping his back passive-aggressively.
“Nothing. And I don’t have a long face.” He pushed back, shoving him softly out of the way.
“Who was that? At the front door?” Jaemin asked, shoving a cookie into his mouth. 
“No one, just someone I knew.” Jisung muttered back, reaching out to steal one from the jar.
“Just someone I knew.” Chenle mocked back, leaning against the wall of the kitchen. “Right. We all could see the look on your face, that’s not just someone you knew.”
Jisung shrugged. “She was a girl I was texting.” He tried to pull it off nonchalantly, but it was evident to his housemates that it wasn’t nothing.
“Shit. Was that that girl you were talking to freshman year? The one you were head over heels for?” Jeno asked, grabbing a seat on a barstool, his laptop tightly in his grip. It was obvious he was working on something.
“Y/N?”Jaemin asked around the crumbs that filled his mouth.
“Ew. Gross. Have some manners dude.” Renjun said shoving Jaemin off the counter where he was perched, “And how many times do I have to tell you not to sit on the counter, that’s not sanitary. We have chairs for a reason.”
Jaemin made a face, but still moved to take a seat next to Jeno.
“Yeah.” Jisung frowned at the rest of the guys. “Did I make it that obvious?”
Renjun laughed, pulling a plate out of the cabinet. “You just talked about her everyday for a month. But no, not that obvious.”
“You should talk to her again, does she live close by?” Jeno asked, typing away at his computer.
“Yeah, she’s… uh… she’s our neighbor.” He rushed the last bit out, knowing that they would take advantage of the situation.
“Ooh! Our Jisung’s little girlfriend lives next door guys!” Chenle cackled out, “Guys, this is fate. And it’s our job to help out.”
Jisung scowled at him, knowing that Chenle meant what he said, “No. Guys leave her alone. Don’t make things weird. We’re going to be neighbors for the rest of the year, I don’t want to have to avoid her.”
“Avoid who?” 
“Haechan, how many times did I tell you to give me that key back?” Renjun asked, narrowing his eyes at the boy.
“Too many.” Haechan shrugged, letting Mark close the door behind him. “You can have this one back though, I’ve got two more copies at my apartment.”
Renjun threw his hands in the air, “I give up.” He picked up his plate of leftovers, opting to sit at the bar next to Jaemin.
“Who are we avoiding though?” Mark asked, settling against the wall next to Chenle.
“Y/N.” Chenle said, giving Mark a knowing grin.
“Y/N? Wait isn’t that...?” Mark furrowed his eyebrows, sporting his signature confused face.
“Uh-huh.” 
“Why are we avoiding her?” He asked, turning to Jisung, who had been awfully quiet.
“We’re not.” Jeno spoke up, finally shutting his laptop. “We just found out she’s our neighbor and Jisung doesn’t want us to do anything about it, cause he doesn’t want to avoid her.”
Haechan grinned, pulling out a glass and filling it up with water from the fridge. “So you still like her?”
“No.” There was an empty silence. “Yes.” 
Jisung sighed at the commotion his confession caused. 
“Well, don’t you think it’s our duty, as your friend, to help you out? After all, I feel like I am very invested in this budding relationship. I did help send the text that set things in motion.” Haechan boasted animatedly, accidently spilling some of his water, which he wiped up with this sock.
“No. I don’t think that it’s your duty. And please stay out of it?” He all but begged the rest of the boys. Much to his dismay, none of them looked like they were swayed. 
Jaemin clapped his hands together standing up, “Okay, how about some neighborly cookies? Everyone likes cookies.” 
Jeno rolled his eyes with a smile, but stood up anyways. “Sure I’m down, but no more of those peanut butter ones, those are shitty. Can’t we just do chocolate chip?”
Jaemin frowned, digging through the pantry cabinet. “You’re lucky we’re out of those. Chocolate chip it is.”
Haechan strolled towards Jisung, wrapping an arm around his shoulder, “How about we get drafting then?” He snorted, “I think a nice love letter should do it.”
Jisung shoved him away with more force than necessary, “Get off me. And no. Stop it with the love letter thing, I was drunk and sad okay?”
Mark butted in before the two of them would really start fighting, “Actually I don’t think that’s a bad idea. I think she’d like that, like, slip it in with the cookies or something. Just say you’d like to see her again, and hang out.”
Renjun stood up, placing his dishes in the sink, “Dude this is why Jisung sent mixed signals in the first place, ‘i’d like to see you again’, ‘let’s hang out’. Can you get any more confusing than that?”
Mark frowned and cocked his head, opening his mouth to retort, but Haechan beat him to it.  “Then what would you say Renjun? ‘Oh how beautiful your eyes compare to a midsummer’s eve. May I court you this evening?’”
Renjun glared at him. “You’re not funny. And no. I was going to say, just tell her it was a missed opportunity. That you’d like to take her out on a date now that you can.”
Jisung shook his head violently at the sound of that. “How am I supposed to do that? That’s way too straight forward, what if she says no?”
“Dude, she likes you. Remember? She sent you that text. And if her feelings aren’t there anymore then… well… I don’t know. But the chances are low.” Jeno tried to reassure him, not doing a very good job of it.
Jisung sucked a breath in, ultimately letting out a hissing noise. 
“Trust me on this one Jisung. I make a mean cookie, we’ll just head over there later today and rekindle whatever you two have.” Jaemin cooed at the boy with a big smile.
“Right. Like I can trust all of you.” He muttered to himself, choosing to escape to the confines of his room.
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“So… how was it?” Your roommate asked expectantly, a far change from the way she was speaking to you earlier.
You shrugged, “I dunno, he was nice I guess.” You shook your head. “I don’t know why you guys are all pushy on this stuff. Like I get it, but it’s weird trying to date someone that I’ve just met you know?”
Your roommate Alex just shook her head, waving you off. “Whatever, so did you like him or not? Is there gonna be a second date?”
You laughed at her, she was way too invested in your non-existent love life. “I don’t know, I think so. He was sweet and stuff, but like I said it’s weird.”
“Well, that’s the furthest you’ve gotten so far.” You sent her a glare. “I’m just saying. You always either end up leaving the date, or never seeing them again.”
“Shut up, I don’t-”
You were cut off by the sound of the doorbell ringing. Alex and you exchanged glances, you weren’t expecting anybody.
She stood up, grabbing the bat next to the door, that your mother insisted you bring, ‘just in case’.
You huffed, moving past her, “You know, you could just look through the peephole.” You leaned forward squinting into the door, only to find a group of boys that seemed your age.
“Who is it?”
You pulled back, tilting your head, “I don’t know, just a group of guys.”
You unlocked the door, peeking out through the crack slightly, and you were greeted very enthusiastically by the boy in front.
“Hi!” He grinned, showing off a perfect set of pearly whites. He was waving very aggressively with his free hand, the other seemed to be holding a plate of cookies. “I’m Jaemin! We’re neighbors.”
After his quick introduction he shoved the plate towards you, never letting the smile leave his face.
“Uh… hi?” You weren’t quite sure what to say. 
Luckily Alex did, “Hi, I’m Alex and this is Y/N. That’s so sweet of you.” She smiled back, taking the plate from you. “Do you guys want to come in? We can crack them open right now.”
You stepped back, watching the trail of six- no seven guys just stroll into your apartment. 
“What the hell?” You muttered to yourself, closing the door softly behind the last boy.
“Hi Y/N.”
You looked up to see Jisung again, and you took a slight step back, startled at the sight.
“Jisung. Oh.” You barely let out.
“Sorry, we didn’t mean to overstep or anything. The guys just wanted to meet you… all. They wanted to meet all of you… cause you’re our neighbors, and all…”
You blushed realizing that he had heard you comment, completely ignoring the way that Jisung was stumbling all over his words.
Haechan took no time in introducing himself, and taking the honor of introducing everyone else as well.
“I’m Haechan, this is Mark, Jeno, Chenle, and Renjun. You already know Jaemin, and I’m aware that you already know Jisung.” He grinned proudly after gesturing to each of the respective boys.
“Jisung?” Alex asked, eyebrows raised. You hadn’t told her about him. For one, it never came up, and secondly, it’s not like it was anything important now. That was years ago, you didn’t feel the need to inform her of every detail of your life, like him.
Haechan cocked his head, “Yeah. You didn’t know they knew each other?”
You furrowed your brows at him. “And how do you know that?”
Jisung shyly raised his hand next to you, embarrassed that he was outed for spilling the details to his friends. “Sorry, that would be my fault.”
You turned slightly, mouth dropping at his face, “Oh. I didn’t mean it like that. I..I- That came out wrong. I’m not mad or anything, I was just shocked.”
You bit your lip feeling guilty about the way he responded.
“Anyways.” Jaemin interrupted the awkward silence. “We just wanted to say hi and stop by. Maybe we can all hang out and stuff and be neighborly.”
He grinned, looking around at the group.
“Right.” You nodded slowly, “Thanks for the cookies, and it was nice meeting you all.” There was a forced smile on your face, but none of the boys seemed to notice or care.
Eventually the boys filtered out one by one, and you closed the door, sighing against it.
“They were nice.” Alex said, taking a bite in a cookie. “Oooh, and these are hella good.”
“Yeah.” You mumbled, moving to sit on the couch.
“Why do you look like that? You don’t like them?” She asked, grabbing a glass for milk. “You and Jisung already know each other though. By the way, how do you know him?”
You rubbed your hand over his face. “It’s a long story.”
“Well, I have the rest of the day.” She sang back, taking a seat on the cushion next to you.
And so, now that Jisung was back in your life, you were left no choice to fill her in.
“Damn! That’s awkward as hell.” Her eyes were widened to the max.
“Yeah, I know. But I didn’t want them to feel super weird, cause you know, neighbors right? I just can’t believe my luck though.” You sighed leaning back, slouching down.
“Yeah, but do you like him though?” She asked, to which you whipped your head towards her.
“What?”
“Do you like him? I mean this could be really good for you. Actually it’s a win-win for everyone here. I can stop forcing you on blind dates and you can date the boy you’ve been pining after for years.” She shrugged like it was obvious.
“Okay, I have not been pining after him for years, and we’re not going to date just because I liked him two years ago. I mean, didn’t you get it from what I told you? He doesn’t like me.” You tried to shut her down.
“What are you talking about? Did you see him today? He couldn’t tear his eyes away from you.” You frowned at her observation. You didn’t remember it the way she did, every time you looked at him, which wasn’t that often, he was desperately trying to avoid eye contact.
“No he wasn’t.” You nevertheless blushed at the idea. 
“Ooh, you’re blushing! Someone has a cru-ush!” She raised her voice, and you slapper her.
“Shut up, they’re right next door remember? They’re our neighbors.” She simply winked at you. 
“And no I don’t.” You added as an afterthought.
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The small restaurant was bustling with energy, something the boys loved.
“Dude, why haven’t we been here before?” Mark asked, eyes wide with excitement, smacking Haechan’s shoulder unnecessarily hard.
Haechan tried to move away from him, but to no avail.
“I told you, Jeno always said this place was pricey.” He muttered back, giving in when he realised Mark’s habit wasn’t disappearing anytime soon.
“We shouldn’t have trusted Jeno’s cheap ass.” Renjun snorted, “The prices here look decent.”
“Hey!” Jeno tried to defend himself. “I’m a college student, everything is expensive.”
Jaemin threw an arm over Jeno’s shoulder, trying to comfort him. “Let’s just grab a booth.”
As they trudged down the busy pathway, Jeno spotted a familiar face.
“Hey isn’t that Y/N?” Jeno asked, elbowing Jisung in the side. But Jisung was already aware of your presence, he had been the moment they stepped into the restaurant.
“Don’t point.” Renjun slapped the boy’s hand down.
“I wasn’t-”
“Shut up.” 
“Wait… who’s that with her?” Jaemin asked the obvious, slurring his words at the end, as if just understanding the situation.
It seemed as if you were on a date, and Jisung’s heart dropped. It felt like his entire world came crashing down, like any and all hope he had in you went out the window.
Of course you would have a boyfriend, it’s been two years since you last talked, and it’s not like you were even an item. You texted for an hour. 
Jisung closed his eyes for a second, but the picture was still searing in his brain. Hell, he wasn’t even sure if he told you that he liked you.
“I guess we didn’t think about that. That she could have a boyfriend.” 
“Yeah, I mean it has been two years.” Mark nodded, agreeing with Jaemin.
“Guys, not helping.” Renjun said between gritted teeth.
Jisung bit his lip, silently running over the image of you. 
Is that your boyfriend? How long had you been dating? Was it after he ran into you? If he asked you out then, would that be him? 
He had so many questions he wanted answered, but he would never get them.
Chenle pulled his arm roughly, trying to drag him into the booth. “Jisung you’re staring. Try not to make it so obvious.” He teased.
Jisung quickly averted his eyes, choosing to sit where he could watch you from his seat. His stomach felt queasy, maybe that was a bad idea. Suddenly he lost his appetite at the sight of you smiling so widely at something funny your date had said.
Mark glanced up from his menu, staring at Jisung who was now downing his water. He elbowed Haechan who was concentrating on the menu. 
“Dude, say something.” He hissed at him, trying to get Haechan to lift the mood. But for some reason, today of all days, he wasn’t having it.
Haechan just shrugged, shaking his head, “What do you want me to do?” Then he went back to his menu.
Mark bit his lip nervously, feeling uncomfortable at the sight of Jisung so anxious. He shot a look at Renjun who understood and at least tried to spark up conversation.
“So Jeno, who’d you come here with again?” He asked, an attempt at diverting attention from the elephant in the room.
“Uhh… some girl…” Jeno mumbled back, blushing furiously.
“Jeno’s blushing!” Chenle shouted out, his loud voice carrying across the restaurant. 
This had Jisung cracking a smile. 
“Dude, not so loud.” Jeno groaned out, sinking into his seat. He turned to glare at Renjun, “Did you have to bring that up?”
Renjun shrugged, but sent a small apologetic smile. ‘Sorry’ he mouthed at the embarrassed boy.
You had Chenle to thank for alerting you of the group’s presence. You pulled away from your conversation with Lucas and craned your head to get a glimpse of your neighbors.
“Do you know them?” Lucas asked, following your gaze.
“Oh, yeah, they’re my neighbors.” You said back, tearing your eyes from their booth.
“Yikes, they’re kind of loud.” He chuckled, “That must be rough on you.”
You gave him a smile, accompanied by your own giggle. “Lucas, in case you didn’t notice, you’re loud.”
He let out a fake gasp, holding his hand against his chest, “Me?”
You laughed, “Lucas, on our first date you thought we had so many complaints about the ‘loud dude in the booth’ that they asked us to leave.”
He frowned, “It’s not my fault my voice carries. And I have a very pleasant laugh, they should’ve been happy to hear it.” He pouted, “But we got ice cream to make up for it.”
You bit your lip, holding back your grin at the memory. “Yeah and it was freezing out.” You paused watching his expression, “But it’s never too cold for ice cream, besides, I wouldn’t have gotten your jacket out of it. And by the way, I’m keeping it. It’s soft.”
He smiled widely, immediately agreeing with you. “I’m just gonna use that excuse to see you again.”
You returned his sentiment, it wouldn’t be all that bad to meet Lucas again. You seemed to enjoy yourself every time you met.
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“Oh. Jisung, hey.” You let out surprised.
“Hi.” He smiled at you shyly, staring back at you.
“Hi.” You blushed at the awkward tension between the two of you.
You turned and locked the door quietly before facing your neighbor again. “I was just heading out.”
“Right.” He mumbled, retreating back towards his apartment.
“I was going to the bookstore to pick up some things…” You trailed off, watching his expression, “If you’d like to come…?”
You immediately regretted your offer, ducking your head to hide your embarrassment. “You don’t have to, that was-”
“Sure.”
You froze, quickly snapping your head to meet his gaze.
“I uhh… have some things to take care of too.” He stumbled over his words to accept your offer.
“Oh, okay.” You smiled shyly at your feet, a strange feeling in your stomach turning.
You nodded in the direction of campus, trudging forward slowly at first to let him catch up. Soon enough the two of you were keeping pace.
A few minutes passed before Jisung cleared his throat, “So what are you getting from the bookstore?”
You nodded to yourself, “I have a textbook I ordered. It’s ridiculous isn’t it? How insanely overpriced it is, and it’s not like it’s even possible to pass the class without it. I mean I’m paying enough for college, now I have to pay on top of that.” You took a breath and chuckled nervously, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to rant on you.”
Jisung grinned at the way you were so worked up, “No not at all. I totally agree. It’s a rip off, I mean why not just make it part of tuition, we’re paying enough as it is.”
You nodded, “Right? It’s not right to make it required, like I could totally pirate it online, but if the professors make our homework using the online site to turn it in, that’s not even an option.”
You sighed exasperated, and missed the look on Jisung’s face. He seemed to enjoy the way you raved on about something as simple as a textbook.
You paused at the sound of his laughter from beside you, and you turned to look at him with a smile, enjoying the sound. 
It was a fifteen minute walk to campus, and another five to the bookstore. And before you knew it the building was looming over your heads.
Jisung jogged a few paces before you, reaching for the door. You paused, watching as he stood aside, holding the door for you.
You blushed, perhaps, as they say, chivalry isn’t dead. “Thank you.”
You reached your hand up, pressing your cold fingers against your burning cheeks, an attempt to chase away the color.
“So which class is it for?” He asked, looking around, and thankfully not noticing your heated face.
“Economics.” You replied, lifting your head in search of your department.
The two of you wandered around for a few more moments, not searching particularly hard for the book in question.
“Look, introduction to Korean Pop Music.” He laughed, pointing at the textbook. “Can you believe there’s a whole course on that?”
You smiled, looking. “I dunno, it seems interesting. Besides, there’s classes for classical music, and pop music, why not K-pop?” 
He nodded back, giving you a glance.
“Here, economics.” You mumbled out, walking down the long corridor. You ran your fingers along the spines of all the books, stopping at the familiar title. “Jesus, 98 dollars.”
He frowned, sidling up next to you. 
Sighing you reluctantly pulled the book off the shelf. “Ready?”
Jisung looked at you under heavy brows.
“You’re going to get it?”
“It comes with the online version. I mean I have to get the online portion, might as well get the hardcopy for free with it.” You nodded towards the check out, stepping towards the staircase.
He followed in suit, stuffing his hands in his pocket. He ran into your back after you stopped abruptly, suddenly remembering something.
“Oh, didn’t you have to get a book?”
Jisung’s eyes widened, “Oh yeah.” At that moment he reached out and grabbed what seemed to be a random book from the closest table, but you chose to ignore it.
He raised the book, and gave you a smile.
Your eyebrows shot up, “Introduction to the female reproductive system?”
Jisung suddenly turned very pale, as he tried to play it off. “Yeah, ummm… for my biology class.”
You grinned, nodding like you believed him. But you chose to continue up the stairs, unable to watch as his face contorted. While you weren’t looking he quickly flipped over the cover, gulping at the sight of the price.
“80 dollars?” But he shook it off, trudging after you.
“Anything else for you?” A boy around the same age as you was checking you out.
“Nope, that should be it.” You smiled, fumbling around with your purse to find your wallet.
“Economics huh? Are you a ManEcon major?” He asked, leaning towards you slightly, ignoring Jisung who had arrived nearby.
You looked up from your bag, “Huh? Oh, yeah ManEcon. You?”
Your hand was still deep in your back when he replied. “Same, I’m a Junior, I managed to switch in last year.”
“Really?” You raised your eyebrows, “Was it difficult?”
“No, I mean I knew I wanted to switch early on, so I already was taking the classes I needed.”
You nodded back, “That makes sense. Have you taken macro yet? I’m signed up this quarter but I’m a little nervous.”
“I had Zeggert last quarter, she was pretty good.” He smiled, nodding, “She likes it when people go into office hours, really tries to help.”
You cracked a smile of your own, “No way, I have Zeggert. Thank goodness, I’m definitely going to use her office hours a lot then.”
You took a moment to successfully dig out your wallet, sliding him your card.
“That’s good, well, I’m here basically all the time. So if you ever need help, you know where to find me.” He winked at you, returning the card.
You murmured out a quick thanks, and stepped aside to let Jisung pay for his books.
Jisung didn’t take long, and you noticed that he was particularly cold with the cashier, who in turn wasn’t nearly as friendly with him as he was with you.
“He was kind of flirting with you.” Jisung mumbled out, picking at the brand new spine of his unneeded textbook.
You glanced at him, stepping through the door that he once again held open, not knowing how to respond to him.
“Don’t you have a boyfriend?” He asked under his breath as you caught up beside him.
“What?” You shot him a puzzled look.
Jisung raised his eyebrows, “Your boy...friend?” He slowed his words, questioning them himself.
“I don’t have a boyfriend.” You let out, not pausing in your steps. The same couldn’t be said for Jisung.
He jogged slightly to catch up. “But your date…?”
“My date?” You asked, now choosing to stop and face him. You shook your head, confused, “What date?”
“The- the guy you were with at the restaurant Wednesday.” He studied the sidewalk intently, flustered at his confession.
“You saw me?” You leaned down slightly, trying to catch his gaze.
“I-uh… I mean I didn’t mean to watch you. But we just happened to go to that restaurant.” He mumbled, choosing to walk forward and escape the situation, but you quickly caught up.
“He’s not my boyfriend, I mean, we were on a date, but he’s not my boyfriend.” You felt the need to defend yourself, or at least clear things up. Although you didn’t know why you felt the need.
“Oh. A date.” He mumbled. He was overjoyed at the fact that you weren’t dating anyone, but couldn’t help but be disappointed at the mention of a date. From what he remembered, you seemed to be enjoying yourself then.
The silence grew until you reached your doorstep. It had taken Jisung fifteen minutes to decide, fifteen minutes to pluck up the courage he needed.
“How about a date with me?” Although he refused to meet your eyes, you felt the genuinity.
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Part 2
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faedawayyy · 3 years
Text
//so i’ve done a little editing to lucinda/lucie for next gen - i’m using stassie for her again, so! anyway, nadine and i were briefly talking about plots seeing as lucie and dixie both go to rosewell and study fashion, then i figured we could do a skeleton friendship group using fcs from kylie/stassies friendship group for next gen! these are all brief bios and ideas for anyone who might want to pick one up! don’t feel you have to. however, there’s enough for every roleplayer to take one! you can make them someones child or maybe figure it out later!
IDEA: a group of fashion students living in paris who’re just trying to figure shit out. they all got assigned the same 2 or 3 rooms which is how they know eachother. it could be as messy as it is friendly bc lowkey they’re all in competition sometimes! they own the parisian version of the insider (blog to be made) and it mainly picks apart peoples looks at events, but gossip too.
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DIXIE CARMICHAEL: THE PRINCESS - played by @yeaahishowedupatyourparty​
i obviously got this from nadine & am not god-modding
fashion designer & make-up developer 
obviously the richest of the group being who she is.
it was her idea for the girls to ditch the university flats and move into a huge apartment together in the centre of paris instead which is what they’ve all done.
tends to get her own way due to being the one who bought them the apartment/gets them into the better events in the city 
very loyal to each of her friends
can definitely be a bitch, though, and has a tendency to want what any of the others have - especially career success/guys - and likes to be the one in the centre.
hetero
fc: kylie jenner
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LUCINDA QUINN: THE SOCIAL CLIMBER - played by yours truly
make-up artist
lucinda is probably has the least wealthy background of all the girls but nobody would guess because she’s been spoilt by elysia
her main aim in life is to achieve celebrity status; she loves the glamour and never passes up an event 
she ALWAYS hypes up her girls and makes them feel special 
it’s also very obvious that she’s using them to some extent though. she knows being in the group will give her leverage
can be a bit of a gossip and has a tendency to backstab
bi
fc: anastasia karankialou
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ALEXIS: THE PARTY ANIMAL - OPEN 
model 
literally the life and soul of the party. she’s never at the apartment after 6pm because she’s always found somewhere to be. 
100% suffers from ADHD 
100% failing classes
100% hungover most mornings and comes to class late in pyjamas with starbucks
textbook extrovert, she’ll give you her opinion and tell you exactly how it is. 
she’s lowkey insecure and hates feeling left out of anything. used to get bullied in high school for being bigger and lost A LOT of weight before rosewell. she doesn’t tear others down but does mentally compare herself to the others constantly.
bi
fc: sydney carson
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PHOEBE: THE ANTI-MENINIST - played by @papcrhouses​
fashion designer
lesbian and proud, she didn’t come out until first year and before that was in a two year toxic relationship
HATES men (not really but it’s her brand) and is over their shit. she’ll be the friend to be like “no girl” if you’re thinking of texting that random guy you met at the club on the weekend 
will also interrogate any of the other girls boyfriends 
she has a daughter from previously mentioned toxic relationship but the dad won custody after lying about the impact her bipolar was having on her parenting
still has said daughter on specific days
lesbian
fc: victoria villarroel
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CHER: THE MOM FRIEND - OPEN 
fashion designer & make-up artist
the sensible one! 
designated driver and forever responsible for making sure the others get their drunk asses home on time 
from a very wealthy family and is quite humble/lowkey with her wealth compared to the other girls
takes her education VERY seriously and is a high achiever 
still fun despite being the mom; always thinks of the best days out
the designated cook and cocktail maker. her skills are untouchable.
secretly has a thing for lucinda but has never come out with it 
bisexual
fc: jordyn woods
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MONROE: THE SUGAR BABY - OPEN
make up artist & stylist
gets very easily starstruck
she has around three different sugar daddies in the city but unlike the girls who just have to send pics, hers expect her to meet them/sleep with them 
like lucinda, her family isn’t as wealthy as people assume, so she feels like she has no real choice 
imitates a lot of what dixie does but in a harmless way, she just looks up to her
gets used/her heartbroken by guys every 3-5 business days and really doesn’t have confidence in real romantic relationships anymore. she just sticks to boomers who’ll buy her a chanel for going down on them 
hetero 
fc: kelsey calemine - IF she isn’t taken, pls lmk if she is! 
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SUTTON: THE BOHEME - OPEN 
VEGAN/ETHICAL fashion designer
very environmentally aware and is big on sustainability 
usually the first to recommend hosting charity events on rallies for different causes
most definitely a stoner lmao
if cher is the mom, sutton is the cool aunt; has great style, gives good advice and laughs with you - not at you - when you fuck up 
kind of a tomboy, really into her sports and has a lot of guy friends 
a lot of people brand her a ‘pick me’ but she’s probably the most genuine feminist of the group. believes girls should get to act how they want without being labelled all of the time. 
when all of the academies went on tour to vegas, she got married to some guy and has no idea who he is. 
big supporter in hook-up culture. lowkey never wants to marry or settle.
wanted to be a recording artist but is really shy about sharing her music.
fc: olivia o’brien 
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POPPY: THE DITZ - OPEN
model
huge airhead and needs the most looking after out of all of the girls
she pretty much believes anything and is super gullible 
the nicest of the girls for sure but she still gets caught up in a lot of gossip and is easily led with her thoughts 
(tw) very attached to all of the girls and never really goes home. she was sexually abused by a relative/close family friend growing up and her ditziness/child-like behaviour is definitely in response to that but nobody really knows this
genuinely a pretty in demand model. she tends to get work through all of her designer friends which is pretty smart of her. 
very passive, finds it way harder than she should to say no & can be easily intimidated 
has never had a real partner but lots of queue up to sleep with her because of her looks.
bi-curious
fc: hailey bieber 
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hopevalley · 3 years
Text
Season 8, Episode 5: What the Heart Wants
I was going to try to follow my scene-by-scene format for the entire season, but I’ve been getting a lot of migraines recently, presumably from staring at the computer too long, so I don’t want to spend all morning working on typing up the play-by-play for this episode.
Also, for what it’s worth I think this episode lends itself to plot discussion better than some of the previous episodes...at least in some sense.
And as another head’s up, it’s back to being critical for me. ;P
Storylines:
School Ends/Graduation/Parent-Teacher Conferences
The Dress Shop/Rachel
Postal Service, Ned
Bill’s Uniform, Nathan’s Vacation
Carson and Faith
Henry
Elizabeth and Lucas
Clara’s Dilemma
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School Ends/Graduation/Parent-Teacher Conferences
This plot felt a little scattered, but for once it wasn’t the kind of storyline they foisted too much drama upon. After years of every single function possible being besieged by bullshittery, it’s a relief to see one go off without a real hitch.
The beginning scene with Robert hugging Elizabeth was sweet. I enjoyed the Canfields immensely and am intrigued by Angela’s role in the story long-term (PLEASE let her befriend Allie!). Nathan...eh, I have thoughts—but I’ll talk about that a bit soon. The actual ceremony was cute and kind of fun with the kids singing. 
Neat Thing I Noticed:
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Continuity? Cat Montgomery is still listed as Emily’s mother. ♥♥♥ I don’t know why but this made me really happy???
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Complaint Corner:
Parent-teacher conferences should have been in this show from a much earlier point, and so should graduation have been. If there was a point to this celebration (the first year in a while anyone was old enough to graduate) that would have been a nice touch, too. It just managed to feel sliiiightly out of place.
I’ll forgive the “everyone in town goes to the graduation” thing because this is 1918...something like this would be a whole-town affair IMO. Invite everyone and have a nice get-together/party, probably on a Sunday afternoon after church but Hope Valley does whatever it wants, so...eh.
The threat of merging Hope Valley with other schools doesn’t fit in this scenario and it feels like they ripped it directly out of Tales from Avonlea which was almost rage-inducing to me.
Look, school mergers happened a lot in the early 1900s, especially around the WWI mark, but it wouldn’t be hitting a rural western town just yet. They don’t have any way of getting these kids to other towns for schooling. Where would the next closest school be? It would have to be pretty large and modern to merge multiple schools together.
*Adjusts nerd glasses* This felt forced and completely unnecessary. If anything this guy could be telling Elizabeth that they’re working on building a modern school somewhat close by, and could even have her involved in some decision-making regarding layout. Then they could bring in a “merger” storyline next season without it feeling out of place.
It mostly just felt dramatic for the hell of it, and it was boring, as was this man’s threat that Elizabeth had no right to teach a blind student. As if they’d accept Angela at a better school? As if her parents could afford top tier education for her? PLEASE.
Now it’s time for Nathan. The man chose to go fishing instead of to the parent-teacher conference? It makes him look like a tool. This isn’t about him or about Elizabeth; it’s about Allie. I understand why he didn’t want to go, but he should have done it anyway. It would have taken five minutes of his time. 
His flippant attitude annoyed me because it went completely against his character as we know it, but Elizabeth’s lecturing was irritating, too. For a moment I thought we had Lorigail back on the show...
I think Elizabeth was well within her rights to warn Nathan about the effect his work has on his ward, but that inquiry took like a week AT MOST. Heck, let’s be generous and say TWO WEEKS. Allie’s concentration suffered for two weeks. There was no need to say more than, “Hey she worries about you and her work suffered for a bit during that time frame, just so you’re aware.” 
I think what annoyed me about the math program thing is that...Elizabeth being a teacher would probably be VERY WELL AWARE that MOST of the parents to her students aren’t good enough at schooling to assist their kids with their homework. I dunno, it just feels out of place for her to tell Nathan that she wants to put Allie in an accelerated “program” and that Allie might need his help with her homework. It’s even more out of place when he admits he used to bribe his sister to do his work for him. Like. It’s very possible he’s not that good at math and isn’t capable of helping. (But maybe that will be a plot down the road...?)
“Or a tutor...” BITCH WHERE IS HE GONNA FIND A TUTOR IN THIS TOWN?! It’s super annoying to see dialogue like this that feels completely out of touch with the reality these people would be living in...lol. But also if she needs a tutor to stay caught up in an advanced program, she probably...shouldn’t be in the advanced program.
I don’t know how to feel about this whole thing here: “Nathan, you are Allie’s world. You’re the only father she’s ever known, and as she grows up you will always be the measure of the quality she’ll look for in a man as she chooses who to marry.” 
On one hand, it does fit the situation (he seems to think everything is behind him but Elizabeth’s words are kind of a caution that 1) his actions still have an effect on Allie, and 2) every day he’s teaching her by example). On the other hand, it seems almost wildly inappropriate to bring up? At the same time, it’s probably not wrong that Allie will measure other men (friends, acquaintances, potential future romantic interests) against Nathan’s example.
I dunno. The conversation felt disjointed. 
I think what they were going for was Nathan just feeling too awkward and weird about being with Elizabeth to want to be there for the conference, but...he interacted with her quite normally after the inquiry and stuff (even after she’d broken things off with him), so...it feels out of place. Like maybe this should have taken place right after the breakup and not weeks later?
Anyone else have thoughts on this and why it doesn’t feel quite right?
--
The Dress Shop/Rachel
This plot wasn’t what I would call a waste of time (rather, it’s worth having it mentioned now), but part of it was completely pointless and stupid. The whole Rachel getting lost thing was tacked into the promos to stir up drama, but nothing happened and there was nothing worrisome even going on. YAWN.
Rosemary’s desire to do something meaningful and different with her life is super interesting. I’m very curious to see what they decide to do with her if Dottie does sell the dress shop.
Also, Rosemary finding the book under Rachel’s bed was pretty funny.
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But yeah, I didn’t really find much in this plotline to care deeply about. I guess I am pretty interested in knowing who might be purchasing the dress shop and/or if this decision is to bring someone else onto the show (a female love interest for the man who doesn’t win Elizabeth’s heart in the end, or even to bring back an old character*) or to take the dress shop out of the equation entirely... It’s also just as possible that Rosemary/Lee or Clara/Jesse end up buying it themselves down the line... Thoughts?
*I can’t begin to imagine who would be the best fit for this in this case, though. Who would have the money to buy her out?
--
Postal Service, Ned
Ned is just honestly so cute and fun. I love him. He’s really been doing well this season and seeing him wander around town delivering mail door to door was kind of nice.
Also, he’s one SMOOTH operator! Look at him, talking about putting a bell on the door so that he and Florence won’t be caught off-guard if they’re in the middle of...something. 
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Oh my, Ned. What might customers be...interrupting? :3
Continuity? Not only was the ulcer from last season brought up, but the horrid cabbage juice was, too. :’) It was a nice touch. And these two had just enough screentime to be kind of fun/interesting without also taking up too much time.
--
Bill’s Uniform, Nathan’s Vacation
Nathan got his vacation and Bill is in charge...again. This happens an awful lot. I wonder if it’ll actually impact the next few episodes or if it’s just here for the hell of it.
I love Bill a lot and I want to brag up his character in this episode a bit. I’ve complained many times in the past about him being written like a Grumpy Old Man Yelling at Clouds but this episode was super respectful. He got his scene with his uniform. Nobody interrupted it. There weren’t even any words. I quite liked it.
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But it also felt kind of...pointless? I don’t want to judge it too harshly yet. Like the dress shop plotline, this could actually be going somewhere in the next couple of episodes. 
Plus, unrelated to the uniform, it was nice to see Bill acting fatherly toward Clara. While it sort of came out of nowhere for the wedding, I appreciate the attempt at continuity there. Plus, so far this season, I’ve felt like Bill’s almost been a father-figure to Clara, Fiona, and even Nathan, so I’m enjoying that a lot.
--
Carson and Faith
CONTINUITY? The show finally remembered that not only is Carson actually a surgeon, but that was his original passion. It’s not that they completely forgot (S5 had him performing surgery on his sister-in-law, after all), but giving Carson a PASSION makes him a way more interesting character to me. 
And also, finally, this feels like a REAL high-stakes plotline for him and for Faith.
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I really liked Faith’s take on things. I know, I know, I’ve been rooting at them to break up, but the reason is mostly because they’re just so BORING together. I’d rather watch Henry twirl around in a chair for an hour than suffer through date scenes with these two.
It’s not that I’m against a doctor wife/husband team. I’m not. I just think Faith was a much more interesting and cool character on the show before Carson showed up and usurped her place (and completely overshadowed her for literal seasons). This plotline for Carson might actually be interesting. Like, a fellowship? For modern surgery? IN BALTIMORE?!
I hope this is Faith’s way of saying she wants a break and/or a break would be good for them. I can’t picture her leaving Hope Valley without any trained medical staff, let alone long enough for a fellowship... 
But if this goes through, what will they do with it? Would they really write Carson off the show? To be perfectly honest with y’all, I’d be fine with that. At least it’s the type of write-off that makes a lot of good sense (unlike some of the other ones we got). I guess this is just another “wait and see” plotline which is uhh...the theme of this episode, huh? Anyone have thoughts on this?
--
Henry
Henry barely had any screentime, but I do want to say he is #relateable. The man is back at work for ten seconds and already exhausted. SAME.
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Also, I appreciate that he’s ready to be back in the oil business. At what cost? I know people were worried they were gonna kill him off, and I really doubted it, but now I’m starting to wonder where they’re going with this exactly. Yet another wait and see moment LOL!
--
Elizabeth and Lucas
Some damn fine scenes for Lucas and Elizabeth in this episode. Mostly the scenic ones. :P
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I enjoyed the agreement to a date. The horseback riding stuff was pretty cute. 
Complaint corner? I don’t know. I have petty complaints. Even though the celebration for the kids was a town-wide event, and therefore Lucas was invited, it still felt out of place to see it brought up. Maybe it should have been mentioned as a town celebration from the start?
Then Lucas’s comment about not wanting to make things awkward for Nathan (who is actually a parent and there) makes a liiiittle more sense. I do think it was good of him to not go, even though he wanted to spend more time with Elizabeth, but it gave off a weird vibe, like, “Look at how good and wholesome Lucas is!” Is that intentional? I’m not...sure...?
For what it’s worth I already felt like Lucas was an honorable person in this regard. He loaned Nathan money, after all. Maybe he should have told Elizabeth he views Nathan as a friend and doesn’t want to hurt his feelings unnecessarily and/or if he was there he’d want to hog her all to himself or something cheesy. Hm.
My other complaints are:
Elizabeth running to the saloon would be WAY faster than all this getting set up at her house...?? Who thought this made sense?
Elizabeth’s dress looked like a nightie she bought at Kohls.
Too many damn candles.
Characters Do What Plot Dictates Even Though Plot Makes No Sense. More at 11:00!!
I have no further comments on the dress. It needed sleeves or something so it looked more like a dress and not like a nightgown/piece of lingerie.
I think the candles might have been on purpose to parallel Jack...but I hated it lol. Fire hazard? HAVEN’T ENOUGH THINGS IN TOWN BURNED DOWN/EXPLODED?!
I didn’t hate the date scene! But I never feel like Elizabeth has any meaningful conversations with Lucas and it’s starting to drive me batty. 
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Could we get uhhh something of substance please? It has to be surface-level nonsense on purpose. Right? RIGHT?
(And no, discussing a book for ten seconds on-screen is not “intelligent conversation” okay...?)
It’s really a shame because I’m starting to actually warm up to Lucas a little bit in this season but it feels like the conversations are just...kind of stilted and she’s not really into dating him—just agreeing to it because he’s the only option. 
And I can’t believe I’m saying this, but...he deserves better than that. 
Don’t get me wrong, by the way. If it’s part of the story and it’s revealed as such down the road, I’ll be fine with it...but I always worry they’ll just skip important relationship milestones and/or important conversations and expect us all to just accept it.
Kiiiiiind of looking forward to the rainy date scene in the next episode, though. I’m Team Nathan mostly but I’m keeping an open mind and I think I might actually enjoy it. Hopefully they’ll get some good scenes together that don’t feel like this one did.
--
Clara's Dilemma
Clara’s fears about running the salon without Fiona...are legit. LOL.
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Also, this little bit was funny (between Mike and Jesse and Bill):
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Anyway, if Clara was that worried about it, she should have just...told Fiona no? I hope it comes up down the road. Poor Molly??
I genuinely don’t know how I feel about Clara and Jesse’s involvement in this episode. I guess it was okay. I liked Clara’s scenes with Bill. I thought the idea of Clara and Jesse buying into the cafe was a nice one. Jesse having “invested” their money and lost it all, though... They did a similar plot with other people in what...Season 5 was it? Or was that the start of S6? He didn’t even say what he invested it in? But he admits the money is all gone? 
I think that’s what was missing from that scene. “I invested it in X, hoping to make us more money, but it didn’t work out and we lost everything.”
I’m not going to criticize Jesse’s characterization, only because sometimes character "growth” doesn’t happen for the better of anyone involved. My biggest worry here is that it’ll be solved by the end of next episode....but I hope that’s not it.
Like, I think they did better with Frank and Abigail if we’re going to talk about a man who didn’t know how to live like he was in a committed relationship. It made more sense with Frank, too, being older and single most of his life. His bouts of selfishness felt realistic.
Jesse feels like he’s somehow getting worse and worse as a person as the show goes on. I’m kind of at a point where I hope he and Clara divorce, because he’s so damn selfish it’s embarrassing. He’s off having a beer while his wife works multiple jobs? And then he has the audacity to act like they should save money when he just blew all their savings? 
I’m sure it’ll work out fine but I hope Clara puts herself in charge of the finances at the very least.
As to investing failures, I liked how they did that with Henry and Abigail. That was the kind of tension and worry that felt natural to me—like she trusted him with her money after he’d proven himself untrustworthy ten million times throughout the years, and he failed and had to uhh admit that. 
Jesse straight up betrayed Clara. Which, if it’s dealt with in a satisfying way...I think can be a good plotline. I just worry about it actually being dealt with properly. That’s a huge stumbling block in a relationship. And why is he continually getting worse as a person? There doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to it. 
Gasp... it’s almost like it’s just plot because they feel like they have to give someone something every damn episode.
--
Which brings me to THE FINAL
COMPLAINT CORNER (The Big Boy™ Complaints)
The show has really struggled with finding its footing. I wish they’d take notes from better shows with ensemble casts (cough cough Road to Avonlea cough) without also ripping off their storylines (cough school merges cough).
My #1 complaint at this point in Season 8 is the SHEER AMOUNT OF THINGS GOING ON EVERY EPISODE.
I want continuity, so I want to see things happen naturally over a season, but my God do we not need to have mindless pointless crap in the episode. Rachel getting “lost” for ten seconds wasted literal MINUTES of screen time that would have been MUCH better allocated to basically anyone else in this episode.
And I don’t think it would bother me so much if it wasn’t also shoved into the promo like it was supposed to matter. It didn’t matter. Nobody cares. Why was it allowed to stay in the episode alongside stuff like Clara and Bill’s conversation?
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Or Lucas and Carson’s?
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I think they want to appease all the fans in every episode by giving them scenes of their favorites, but what did Henry sitting in his chair accomplish in this episode? Rachel getting lost? Jack not sleeping well/missing his mom? The school superintendent?
Did Bill trying on his uniform have to be in this episode? Did Jesse and Clara’s problems have to come fully to light right now?
When every episode is formatted like this, with 10 plotlines all interconnected slightly and going on at the same time, I feel like...nobody gets the spotlight they deserve when they deserve it.
I cANNOT believe I’m saying this, but this plotline for Carson, especially if it will end with him leaving the show for a while or permanently should get the focus it deserves. But it won’t if we get tiny snips of it here and there and then BOOM decision made because Reasons.
And again, I know I’ve said before that I want more continuity throughout the season, but... the best way to do that is to tighten up the plots. Have fewer of them per season and give more screentime to the ones you choose to pursue. 
--
Anyway, I’m still enjoying the season, but I hope they keep some of this kind of stuff in mind for next season. They don’t need plotlines for everyone in every episode. They need the plotlines they choose to write to be worth their screentime.
Sorry this was sloppily written and all that. Hopefully it makes sense. Very curious to see y’alls thoughts. Feel free to make your own posts and @ me, or reblog this or comment!
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ryansmusicboard · 2 years
Text
My Three Favorite Artists As Of December 1, 2021
Hi everyone. I’m not sure how much I’m going to use this music board, but its a good way to waste time, as I labour day after day at my job that just doesn't pay enough, and lets me vent my thoughts to whatever is going on at the current moment, which is usually music. I could talk about things that piss me off, like Pop Smoke’s label milking his name for all they could, (Although the Kanye West and Pusha T song on the album does not make me mad), but instead, for my first post on this blog and on the website in general, I want to talk about my top three favourite artists currently.
Now this list has changed drastically since I started really getting into music in early February of 2019, which is when I started my main playlist, which now stands at a whopping 65 hours and 58 minutes, with 1,261 songs. When this playlist began, I didn't realize the wormhole I was opening up in terms of creative experiences, but I am so glad that I started it.
Lets start the list, shall we?
3. JPEGMAFIA
Man, JPEGMAFIA. I remember the first time I was introduced to him. A friend of mine from California, who, at the time I’ve known for about 1 and a half years, sent me this song called 1539 N. Calvert. I trusted his music opinion, he listened to mainly electronic music and still does, but a majority of the stuff he sent me, I liked. So, being the naive kid I was, I opened the link, and heard JPEGMAFIA for the first time. I finished the song, took off my headphones, and thought, “Man, this song is absolute garbage.”.
Weird introduction to my third favourite artist, right? In hindsight, I think the same way. However, I never heard something like that ever. The production was insane, vocals were out of this world, and I just couldn't even start to comprehend the blood, sweat, and tears put behind this one song. A week later after I put my headphones down, I started thinking about the song again. I didn't like it, but it was interesting. Something about it just clicked in my head the second time around, and instead of thinking it was absolute garbage, I thought, “Man, I want more of this.”. That lead me to listen to his 2017 album, “Veteran”. Song after song, I was floored. One by one, the production started to click in my brain. Songs like “Germs”, and “Rock N Roll Is Dead” are still stuck in my head to this day, just because I love the songs that much.
JPEGMAFIA kind of stayed in the back of my mind for about a year, once in a while I would go back and listen to Veteran, or one of his other projects like “Black Ben Carson”, but I wanted something more. Something was missing, something I didn't get until his 2019 release, “All My Heroes Are Cornballs”.
When the first single off of the album released, “Jesus Forgive Me, I Am A Thot”, I knew I was in for something fun; and I do mean fun. Not only could I hear that Peggy was at the top of his game in this song, but that he was genuinely happy making it. Somewhat related, but isn't it so great that you can hear when an artist is enjoying making their music? It’s some kind of shine that you can just, feel. Anyways, I was eagerly waiting for the album drop, and on the Friday when it did, I was not dissapointed. I don't think there's a single song on this album I don't like, which is a reoccurring theme you may see throughout this list. The title track may be my favourite song on the album. Peggy is in his game on this, really putting in his all throughout the track, and you can see it. Top tier production, great bars, and just an overall good time. If you only count production in this list, JPEGMAFIA would be number one. But hes not. And this is my blog, so we’re playing by my rules. Sounds good? Good.
Lets move on to number two.
2. Smino
If you could search up the definition of feel good music on Google, I don't think, I know, that Smino would be the first artist that pops up on your feed. Melodic flows, incredible producers and mixers, Smino plucks every single string you would imagine, and more.
Unlike how I started listening to JPEGMAFIA, I started listening to Smino though an Instagram post, surprisingly. Even funnier, I was listening to him for the first time while working out, which, if you listen to him, his music isn't really made for that. Its made for, other activities - activities which I’m not sure I’m allowed to state on this website (Its my first post here, okay?). Needless to say, I was hooked instantly - who wouldn't be? “blkswn” was the first album I listened to from him, and wow. I have an issue with albums that go over 15 songs - I find it hard to stick to a lot of the songs if you do a continuous listen, but Smino manages to nail it with his infectious flows and smooth beats.
Following up my listening of “blkswn”, I decided to listen to “NOIR”, his other album. Imagining nothing could top his previous album, I went in with low expectations. That thought, without question, made the listening experience multiple times better. On first listen, I was hooked by the most popular tracks, like “L.M.F”, and “KLINK”. Those songs were incredible, but as I re-listened and re-listened, I fell in love with deep cut songs, like “HOOPTI”, and “LOW DOWN DERRTY BLUES”. There’s something about Smino’s voice that just makes you feel good. His entire discography, from what I’ve experienced, feels like a warm hug - and that's just how I like my music.
What really cemented Smino’s place on this list was one of his singles that was released recently, “MLK Dr”. God, I love this song so much - I genuinely do not think I can put into words how much I adore every aspect of this track. Instrumental, vocals, mixing, I cant say anything other than wow.
This dude has the best ad libs ever. Period. I fucking love Smino.
Im gonna stop gushing cause its getting annoying. Number one time!
1. Saba
I usually feel obligated to write a long text blob explaining my love for an artist, or what makes them special in my eyes. For Saba though, I don’t feel the need.
Raised in Chicago, Saba learnt piano at just seven years old. From there, it seems like music was just made for him. From keys on a piano to keys in beat-making software, the kid seemed destined for greatness. He released two mixtapes in the early 2010′s, and collaborated with Chance the Rapper twice, with the second song “Angels”, blowing up and pushing Saba into the spotlight. Later that year, after the songs success, he released his debut album, “The Bucket List Project”.
This album is great, and obviously has no skips. Songs like “Stoney” and “Church / Liquor Store” became instant classics in my eyes, and I still enjoy the album thoroughly to this day. Everything seemed great for Saba.
The next year, tragedy struck in the form of John Walt’s death.
John was a close friend of Saba’s and other members of Pivot Gang, the collective he was a part of. The death was unexpected and horrible, and nobody understood why or how it happened initially.
Over the next few weeks and months, details became more clear and members of Pivot Gang were able to grieve. Saba did something special, though. He took that grief and turned it into something beautiful.
In 2018, Saba released “CARE FOR ME”, a beautiful tribute to his late friend. This album is perfect - there’s no debate. Saba pours his heart out on this album, speaking of childhood experiences and how they have shaped the person he is today.
As you probably have noticed, I link songs that I speak about when I talk about them. For this album I’m not going to do that. I want you to experience this album all by yourself. Listen to it, and when you’re done come back and let me know your thoughts. I’m curious, genuinely.
Ending
Well, this is the end of my little talk about my favorite artists. It’s not much, but I wrote it and I’m proud of it, so you better like it too.
Seriously though, if you read this all, thank you. It’s nice to be heard from random strangers on the internet, it’s great.
This may be the first post of many, or maybe I’ll never post again, we’ll see.
Bye for now.
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darthmelyanna · 3 years
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1. John is bored. Bored, bored, bored. He’s also pacing back and forth, restless and feeling claustrophobic with the knowledge that there’s an understanding that he won’t try to leave, despite the door technically not being locked. It doesn’t help that the room feels small, the walls pressing in. In a moment of inspiration, he decides that he clearly needs to determine exactly how small by turning his pacing into useful steps of measurement.
2. He’s just completed the length of the room (around 10 strides, although now of course he is realizing he doesn’t know how long one of those actually are), and is primed to measure out the room’s width when a gentle yet pointed clearing of the throat distracts him. He pauses, foot hovering over the ground, and eyes Elizabeth in trepidation. She’s sat on the floor, leaning against the far wall and staring at the tablet balanced against her knees.
3. ‘If you don’t stop pacing,’ she says, her voice deceptively pleasant in a way John knows she only uses during particularly annoying political negotiations. ‘Then I will shoot you with your own gun, and the only thing that will remain when they release us from this quarantine will be your desiccated corpse.’ John waivers a moment, but wisely decides not to call her bluff, and instead crosses back over to where she is sat, dropping down heavily beside her on the floor.
4. ‘I’m bored,’ he mutters, sounding petulant even to his own ears. She huffs quietly, but doesn’t move away when he settles his shoulder against hers. ‘I know you don’t like being grounded and away from the action,’ she says, even as she finishes typing out a response to what he assumes is yet another budget request from a scientist wanting to blow something up. ‘But we are only seven hours into a two-week quarantine period, and one of us is going to go insane if you can’t settle down.’
5. ‘Carson could have at least provided us with more than a few books and the beds,’ he points out, just to support his argument. He knows the good doctor will surely deliver more items to them during their two weeks of isolation, especially considering how hastily the team had had to go into this quarantine, but he’s feeling frustrated enough by the situation to belabour the point anyway. Elizabeth merely raises an eyebrow, but her expression when she finally lays down her work tablet is soft.
6. The mission had gone so well at the start, he reflects ruefully. He should have been suspicious, because things rarely were so easy for any of their missions, especially when Elizabeth made one of her rare appearances off-world. He was starting to think she was cursed with bad luck. And yet, Lt Miller and some of the locals falling seriously ill had not been on his list of potential things to go wrong when she had marched through the gate with them.
7. ‘Hey,’ he feels her hand touch his arm gently. ‘John, what’s really bothering you?’ The concern in her voice makes him deflate, and he sighs heavily. In reality, it was no hardship to be stuck in this section of Atlantis for a couple of weeks, especially when his team was currently safe, still healthy and a radio-call away. And, above all, it had the added bonus of being around Elizabeth without any major risks of disruption. Honestly, it was all fine, except –
8. ‘It’s going to sound stupid,’ he admits. ‘But I remembered it was your birthday today, and well, I had a nice celebration plan set out for us – dinner and everything. Finally having the time for a proper date. The team wanted to do a party for you this week as well. And now, it’ll be spent with you stuck in here, with no good food and only work emails as a present.’
9. Her hand slides down his arm until their fingers can intertwine gently, and he feels her rest more heavily against his side. ‘I’m sure that would have all been very nice,’ she says, her hair tickling his chin as she moves. ‘But I’m also quite happy to have a great excuse to spend two weeks of uninterrupted time with you, you know.’ He feigns shock at this, pressing his free hand against his chest. ‘Why Elizabeth, what are you proposing we do for all this time?’
10. ‘You can get a head-start on your paperwork,’ she deadpans, and then laughs at whatever disgusted expression is surely on his face. ‘Ooor, who do you think persuaded Carson that quarantining in pairs to combat loneliness was a good idea?’ This time, he can’t help but be genuinely a bit surprised, especially when she punctuates her sentence with a slight eyebrow waggle. ‘I like the way you think,’ he says, truthfully, and tilts her head up for a kiss. ‘Happy Birthday, Elizabeth.’
(OK, technically it is not still your birthday here, but thaaankfully it is in the US, since I was away from my comp all day and couldn't gift you this lil fic present. Happy birthday! Sending hugs from across the ocean :) And hope you’ve had a nice day so far!)
*
EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You are always a delightful surprise, Inbox Fic Anon. Thank you so much! I love it. It’s perfect.
I’ve had a great day. I hope you did too!
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jordm · 3 years
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Heartland 14x06 - The New Normal recap
Hello hello! Last week I didn’t end up writing a recap because I didn’t end up watching the episode until around Friday... and uhhh this is the same but this week i’m a little less busy so I have some free time to actually write something up.
So anyways, episode 6!
Horses are being pushed out of the herd and the new leader, Kaz is apparently ruthless. Okay, maybe not ruthless but so far 3-4 horses have been pushed out and they need to re-home asap. Amy agrees to put on a clinic to help re-home them and apparently people are interested because its Amy. No pressure. Nope, none at all.
Amy isn’t sure that she wants to lead the clinic - not because of the horses or her abilities about, but because of the people. She’s afraid it could lead to new clients, who know nothing about her except that she’s a horse whisperer and all that surface level stuff. She’s also afraid that people will just feel sorry for her - which is also valid but you have to start putting yourself out there.
And then CLINT shows up! Clint - and he didn’t bring a child for Amy to take in temporarily like Luke, so that’s an improvement right? It’s great to see Clint. I’m reminded that Clint had his own special bond with Ty and he is essentially the reason Amy and Ty even met, so it’s great to see him again. 
I can tell that Amy is getting used to running clinics again but i love to see her do her thing. When Amy can’t get Shadow to jump - and in her first clinic back she feels like she failed. I don’t think other people are thinking that but we always tend to think the worst of themselves.
Amy wants things to be the way it is. She wants people to stop feeling sorry for her and being sensitive to her feelings. Here’s the problem, the people who love you often want to not see you upset and thus seek to protect your feelings, even if its not for the best because you want to be treated normally. Secondly, things will never be the same - they will never be the same as they were before Ty’s death and often you just need to get used to the “new normal.” Once she comes to terms with the new normal, hopefully with time, Amy will come to look back at the past fondly without falling apart every time. And then maybe she can continue to make future plans for her and her daughters future.
Lou (possibly to the detriment of poor Peter’s sanity) turns the visit into a sleepover in order to support her sister and be there for her. It was nice to see Lou supporting Amy and being the best sister she can be. They even bonded over seeing her father and her ex boss kiss, which was a nice moment. I’d like to think that Lou’s encouragement helped Amy open up and be brave enough to get back into the ring - literally. Seeing Spartan and Shadow be bffs was just the cutest.
The guy who Clint brought, I also forgot his name, came looking for some horses for his clinic thing and after the show Amy put on, he offers to buy all 5 horses! Amy graciously says no to helping to train them but offers to put him in touch with some other trainers, but something tells me that Amy and this guy will cross paths again.
Katie doesn’t seem to be taking Mitch & Lou’s relationship well (I feel like Katie thinks that she’s getting a new dad and she doesn’t want that) but I think she’ll come through. Maybe Peter will be the one to convince her Mitch is not trying to be her new dad? Mitch loves Lou and is not trying to replace Peter - and sometimes this takes kids longer to get (or even adults!).
In the end, all Katie wanted was to not to lose her dad. Katie saw Lyndy lose her dad and she didn’t want the same to happen to her, even though both situations were arguably very different. I love seeing the relationship between Peter and Katie grow, its a very special bond and I’m glad Peter assured her that he wasn’t going anywhere. This conversation also convinced me that Peter won’t get in the way of Mitch and Lou seeing how he supported their relationship.
We also get a Carson and Caleb appearance! (okay, i thought i heard Carson this could be wrong). We also get a glimpse of Caleb as a father and its just the cutest thing. Look at how Carson grabs Caleb’s finger and how well Caleb entertains Lyndy and Katie. Just the cutest. I’m hoping for Cassandra and Amy scene like that next season.
Speaking of which, we also get a Cass update! Good news, they’re still together. Bad news - or good? She had a chance to step up at the clinic with Ty’s death and she took it and while Caleb is happy for her, he misses her and is struggling to parent (mostly) alone.
Fred wants Jack to be the spokesman for Heartland beef. But just Jack. JUST JACK. Jisa arrives at the conference and in a suit! He has a meet and greet, itinerary and everything and goddamn, that hotel is beautiful. Except Jack is suffering - everything is just too nice! Lisa, however, is enjoying every minute.
Luckily, Jack is a star. The star of the conference. I love seeing Jack and Lisa thrive, get away from the ranch and have some much belated alone time. Even a broken wrist cannot stop them from having some quality time and having a romantic evening in. I LOVED Lisa telling her husband he does not always have to be the rock, he can feel things and be emotional. He does not always have to put his feelings aside to help Amy, nor does he have to feel guilty to he happy. Ty would want his family to be happy.
The last convo between Jack and Tim, where they both agree to “live and learn” is ironically very funny. Jack had a “horrible time” and “nothing” happened between Tim and Jessica. Yep, totally.
Lastly, do I smell a romance between Tim and Jessica?? I’m here for it. But let’s hope this ends better than his romance with Jen. Jessica even kind of looks like Jen... from afar. I love them bonding over both having cancer/having a cancer scare and I think they fit well together.
On a side note, I cannot wait until Georgie is back. I can’t wait to see and explore how she feels and dealt with Ty’s death - something we’ve been doing with other characters in the last few episodes. I presume she’s also changed a lot from her time in Florida as well.
Oh- and Mitch is back on our screens! Like, literally. And not through a phone.
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Okay, here are my initial thoughts on Princess Adventure. These are in no way organized; they’re just as I can remember them. Feel free to send asks if you want
- Barbie defending Chelsea’s creativity and imagination is great to see. It’s one of the best parts of Dreamhouse Adventures so it’s nice to see them continue that in this film
- I like “Try It On” a lot more now. It’s not my favorite, and I think it’s one of the weaker songs in comparison to the rest of the soundtrack, but it’s honestly kind of a bop.
- “It’s like they don’t even want me in this movie!” LOL even Tammy herself knows she’s been done an absolute injustice.
- Holy crap Amelia’s plan is so freaking funny to me. She could’ve just, like...invited Barbie over to her kingdom since she’s the princess and was already a fan of Barbie’s vlogs anyway. But nah, she’s gotta have this whole convoluted “cultural exchange” bullshit I just can’t
- Speaking of Amelia, it’s a little disappointing that we don’t spend nearly as much time with her as we do with Barbie, and, thus, we don’t get to see who the supposed “real” her really is. She says she finally got to explore things about herself, like her fears and dreams, but she never goes into details. Ironically, the audience never gets to see who the true Amelia is, we just have to go off what she said about “who [she] is does matter”. I mean, we certainly get glimpses of it (again, the convoluted plan - she’s obviously ‘act first think later’), but overall it’s not nearly enough, at least to me
- “(Not A) Picture Perfect Girl” might just be my favorite song from this movie. It honestly made me tear up a bit. We’ll see if that changes over my next rewatches
- The running gag with Trey mixing up Barbie and Amelia while Ted and Ned knew was a lot funnier than I expected it to be
- Trey is now trans and you can’t change my mind.
- I really appreciate “Somewhere New” a lot more now since seeing it in the movie. I love that the choreography starts on the plane. It was a cool choice that really felt like a “musical” thing to do. I also like that everyone got to sing at leaset a line or two on their own. 
- WTF happened between Floravia and Johanistan? Did they have a war or something? Why are they being united into just a bigger Floravia? It sounds pretty fishy. I can understand why Johan is so upset based on what little information is given to us, so I wish they had gone into it a bit more.
- Johan asked “Amelia” (Barbie in disguise) if she remembered what they said they would do as rulers when they were kids. That never comes back and it really bothered me. What was the promise? That they’d rule together? That they’d treat each other’s kingdom equally? I actually thought at the coronation that Amelia would give the answer to that question (something like “Johan, remember what we told each other...”) and then do something like absolve the treaty so that she and Johan would rule their own respective kingdoms. l
- IDK, I think I would’ve just liked it more if Johan had been like Amelia’s brother/cousin/whatever that wanted to become King. He’d be a more boring villain that way but it would be less complicated than this.
- WE GOT REPRISES OF 2 SONGS BUT THEY AREN’T ON THE SOUNDTRACK?! I will NOT stand for that. As soon as the movie comes out on DVD I’m ripping those tracks out and adding them to my playlist
- I really thought Ken and Barbie were finally going to get together. I shall now accept my clown shoes and wig. I’m already applying the makeup now.
- The sequence for “Life in Color” disappointed me a bit. It’s one of my favorite songs on the soundtrack, but the placement in the movie felt like it came out of nowhere. I was really hoping for a nice, tender moment between Barbie and Amelia. Even if they were kept separated, it could’ve started with them video-chatting again. Maybe they’d talk about their personal struggles and then Barbie would stop the recording (”We don’t have to film this...”) and they’d just have a moment between themselves to talk.
- On the other hand, “King of the Kingdom” was such a good scene. It was very entertaining and I laughed a lot (which I had to hold back a lot since I was still at work). Also, those boys can move!!
- To make up for all of the interruptions and missed opportunities, Ken Carson deserves at least 3 episodes centered on him and his life and 1 where he finally tells Barbie how he feels
- TAFFY HAD NO REASON TO BE IN THIS MOVIE. I don’t care that Barbie almost always needs an animal sidekick. Snowy (Amelia’s bunny) fills that role. Taffy just gave everyone a freaking heart attack. Also, how the heck did she survive the plane ride? California to Floravia is a 10-hour flight so how did she stay unnoticed for so long?? ROBERTS FAMILY, GET SOME DAMN LEASHES!
- Speaking of that scene, I hate it. It ate up valuable time that could’ve been later spent developing the plot or Amelia’s character. It was only like 2 minutes but in a movie that is already pretty short (1hr11min) every second counts
- Can DA please finally drop the whole “Hey look Renee is claustrophobic” already? It’s repetitive as all hell and honestly it rubs me the wrong way how often it’s played for laughs. It works in the DA Halloween episode since it’s all about everyone facing their fears but everywhere else it feels like a cheap & undeserved laugh (it only happens twice in the movie I think but I wanted to mention it anyway)
- Morningstar being a little bitch to Barbie was hilarious. I don’t really like animal toys anymore but I’d totally buy her. (She’s part of a doll-horse set called Prance & Shimmer Horse. The Barbie doll has Amelia’s princess dress).
- “This is My Moment” really warmed my heart. The last shot with Amelia and Barbie smiling at each other reminded me a lot of Princess & the Popstar actually. I also really like how they brought back stuff from “Try It On” for Barbie’s verse. Musical finale numbers that bring back earlier motifs is something I just cannot get enough of. 
- I liked Alfonso. Like Amelia said, he means well; he just didn’t put as much thought into what Ameila herself wants as he could have. But hey, he was learning just as much as they were
- I LOVED all of the stuff with Barbie trying to make it big and that bitch Rose Ross being all “This is what you have to do to make it sweetie :)” like that’s a great thing to show to kids. You can want to be famous and expand your content like Barbie wanted to, but you have to be smart about it, and you have to stay true to yourself. That plotline also mixed pretty well with Amelia’s life being formulated for the public too. I really did like all of that stuff about how media, social media especially, is constantly fabricated and edited to make things seem easier/better than they might be in real life. 
- THEY FINALLY WENT BACK TO INDIVIDUAL END MORALS THANK GOD. I got really tired of seeing “This is our story, what’s yours?” after every Barbie movie, especially when every movie that used it wasn’t going for that message. Hell, that’s not even a lesson or anything, that’s just a random end quote.
- “Life doesn’t happen on camera. Life is what happens when the cameras are off” THAT IS SO GOOD AND RELEVANT I CAN’T EVEN!!!
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carewyncromwell · 3 years
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Hello :).
So.. Can i get some Headcanons for both Jacob and Carewyn cromwell about "How would they react when they see a random little kid crying and how would they handle it"?.
And, "What kind of their music taste like? Rock? Pop? Orchestral? Etc..".
Then, "Which muggle sports the most appealing in their eyes and do they want to try it too or nah?".
Last, "The most awkward/don't know what to do if someone confessed to them (Romantically)".
Ah, sorry for this 😅. Hope you have a great day! Don't forget to smile 💙 :)
Oh my gosh! So many lovely questions about my precious Cromwell kiddos!! Thank you for the good wishes, as well -- I’m feeling a lot better today, and the support really does mean a lot. *virtual hug* <3
All right! Let me see here...Carey and Jay!
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"How would they react when they see a random little kid crying and how would they handle it?”
Carewyn: Immediately get down on their level and try to comfort them and figure out what was wrong! Carewyn is the ultimate Mama Bear.
Jacob: At first he’d probably assume the kid’s just throwing a tantrum or something and ignore it. If the kid was alone and/or in visible distress, though, he’d probably look around for the parents. If he doesn’t see them, he’d then try to see if the kid was lost and help find them.
"What kind of their music taste like? Rock? Pop? Orchestral? Etc..”
Hahahaha, okay, Carewyn and Jacob’s music tastes are completely antithetical to their respective “images,” so this is a particularly good question.
Carewyn: “Little Miss Perfect” is all about the rock and roll, baby! Her favorite band is the Eurythmics, but she’s also a huge fan of artists like Queen, AC/DC, Elton John, and Michael Jackson among others, and of course she adores the Weird Sisters. Carey-Bear actually really enjoys rocking out to the hard stuff with Tonks, Charlie, and Carson Ivey @ariparri.
Jacob: The eccentric, grungy, cocky magical prodigy known as Jacob Cromwell likes a lot of chiller and/or cheerful 60′s and 70′s folk and pop music, such as Don McLean, the Osmonds, and Olivia Newton-John, but his ultimate guilty pleasure is ABBA. If you put on Dancing Queen, Take a Chance on Me, or especially his favorite song Mama Mia!, Jacob will be almost physically unable to not dance and sing along.
Both of them are also incredibly fond of singing Christmas carols with their mother Lane! When Carewyn and Jacob were young, the three Cromwells used to go caroling with a group from the Muggle church down the road from their house every year.
"Which muggle sports the most appealing in their eyes and do they want to try it too or nah?"
Carewyn: Carewyn’s much more into watching and playing Quidditch than any Muggle sports, but she does find figure skating competitions a lot of fun to watch! She thinks the talent of the competitors is incredible and their routines are very artistic and pretty too.
Jacob: Jacob’s even less of a sports person than his sister, unfortunately, so watching and playing sports of any type isn’t really his jam. He’s honestly way more of a scholar than a jock.
"The most awkward/don't know what to do if someone confessed to them (Romantically)"
Carewyn: Oh boy. Please don’t confess to this poor child unless you know for sure she feels the same way -- otherwise she will hate herself FOREVER knowing that she can’t be what you want her to be. Carewyn has a lot of self loathing as it is and constantly feels like she’s never good enough for anyone she does feel for, so if she doesn’t feel the same way for you, she’ll resent herself so much for hurting you, even if it’s totally not her fault. There have been a few times Carewyn’s gotten valentines from secret admirers in the past, many of whom she never learned the identities of, and she hated receiving them because she hated the thought both of someone liking her who she didn’t like back and of someone claiming romantic feelings when they probably didn’t even know her very well. (Most of those secret admirers maaaay or may not have been kind of “headed off” by some of Carey’s buddies and told to cease and desist, so as not to get their hearts broken and not upset Carewyn further. *cough*TulipTonksandCharlie*cough*)
Jacob: *snorts* Um...Jacob is an absolute idiot when it comes to people, and that includes romance. There are plenty of times my poor disaster bi boy has had a crush on someone, but it took someone else explicitly bringing up his weird behavior around the person or asking him if he felt something special for Jacob to even realize he had a crush in the first place. Admittedly Jacob’s reckless overconfidence, genius intellect, and risky escapades regarding the Cursed Vaults tended to ward a lot of his classmates off, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t have any admirers at school. The few people who were  actually brave and foolish enough to try to make any romantic advances toward Jacob, however, had to deal with his boy best friend Duncan Ashe, who did NOT approve of just about anyone who might want to date Jacob. Sometimes Duncan would stand back and let them ask if he knew Jacob wasn’t particularly interested, since it was funny to watch those people comically hit the wonderfully book-smart, people-dumb brick wall that was Jacob Cromwell -- but from time to time, Duncan would also hide a love note sent Jacob’s way, partially to “protect” Jacob and partially out of pure jealousy. Often those notes were from people that Duncan acknowledged could be attractive in some way to Jacob (i.e. physically), but Duncan just didn’t trust them around Jacob for whatever reason, whether because he didn’t like them as people or they had a reputation for playing with people’s hearts. Duncan was never able to admit his own feelings for Jacob before his death out of his own pride, and Jacob didn’t ever acknowledge the feelings he’d subconsciously been nurturing for Duncan until after his death, and that’s a rather sore spot for both of them.
Send me one of my characters, I’ll give you a headcanon!
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I’ve often wondered if this place is haunted. It ought to be.
Series 1, episode 5
Previous episodes 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 
I will start by saying this may be my favourite episode so far. The manipulation, oh boy, it has reached new levels. Ms. O'Brien's middle name has to be that; manipulation. She may be the best thing in the episode.
The subplot of the flower show brings us into the mindset of the bootlicker and while Violet is not exactly tired of having such people around her, she's shown to be magnanimous and surrender her own prize to Mr. Molesley. But whose bloom was actually the best? We'll never know...
Mrs. Patmore has cataracts, there are some funny scenes about it and then we see Carson being a good hearted boss to her. 
Right now, I wonder if something had happened between Mr. Patrick and Ms. O'Brien. God forbid someone speaks for the Titanic.
Sybil continues her quest to help Gwen find a job. They have a little adventure that could have been avoided had she trusted the stalk... sorry, I meant Branson. (The budget was low and Leech was not in the episode though). The job interview was unsuccessful, but we saw Sybil being good hearted and a rebel all on her own. Go girl
Daisy is still itchy aka traumatised after watching the transfer of Pamuk's dead body and everyone (and their dog) has noticed. Mary's in trouble. 
Robert gets a letter from his sister. Mary's in double trouble. 
Of course, like other people in this house, she can't keep her mouth shut for appearances sake. The letter, as we learn later on, is bad news. Her reputation is in tatters. Hmmm I wonder who's responsible for that. Wait, Thomas sent a letter to a friend of his, "Lady Mary was no better than she ought to be." The friend is a valet of a gossiper who clearly spread the news around London.
Now, the interesting part is "you won't tell, will you? I'm in enough trouble as it" and once again we see he acts first and thinks later. It doesn't really cross his mind the consequences of his actions.
As opposed to Ms. O'Brien, whose thoughts are precise and she’s thinking well ahead of the results if the acts succeed. 
Thomas steals the wine. If anyone wondered in the last episode who the thief was, we found him here. Bates catches him in the act. Of course it was Bates!
So, when he tells Sarah Bates saw him nicking a bottle of whine, she starts having thoughts about it and makes him think he has to do something about it. She manipulates his fear expertly.
Thomas on the other hand is certain Bates will tell Carson when "he's feeling spiteful". Why does Thomas think so? Is it projection? Is it the way he's been treated all his life? The certain is that this is what he believes. Bates will tell the truth to Carson, eventually. In the meantime, in the next episode, Bates says clearly to Anna that he doesn't plan to say anything to Carson because he doesn't want anyone to lose his job. Not even Thomas.
Thomas acts under false pretenses.
And I think it's safe to assume (as safe as is to assume) that Ms. O'Brien is behind his certainty. 
Back to Mary,
Her parents claim she has to get married. Since Matthew is out of the question, there's a new gentleman, Strallan, in the picture. Robert doesn't like him. He's the same age as him and dull.
Matthew doesn't like Edith the way Edith would like him to like her (Hint; he likes Mary). He makes it absolutely clear to his mother. He says as such to Mary as well. It makes me question Matthew pov as well. Why does he do it? Matthew is not stupid. He has seen how the sister behave towards the other. His affections for Mary though clouds his judgement. Of course, Mary turns around and says so to Edith.
And Mary uses it against Edith.*
And O'Brien uses it against everyone.
Because the master mind is Ms. O'Brien.
She starts with Daisy, and what she knows about Mary and Pamuk.
She continues with Cora in a superb scene. Cora says her daughters are all grown up and they need their own establishments.
"No one ever warns you about bringing up daughters. You think it’s going to be like Little Women. Instead, they’re at each other’s throats from dawn till dusk."
Now, besides the fact this is something Sarah is going to use, there is a certain insensitivity from Cora's side to say that to her maid when said maid has no children. We don't know if it was a decision willingly made, or if O'Brien just didn't have the chance to get married and have children of her own. Or even if she wanted to have kids.
Which brings Sarah to Edith, manipulating her insecurities that have caused her to dislike her older sister, using Daisy's story.
And as it happens, Mary shows Edith she can have any man she wants, whenever she wants him, may that be Matthew or Strallan (whom Edith likes after realizing Matthew doesn’t want her. Like Edith’s heart has clearly many leaves ready to be shared), followed by listening to her mother and Mary talking about her. 
 You mustn’t be unkind to Edith. She has fewer advantages than you.
 Fewer? She has none at all.
(Between you & me, Mary had it coming!)
So Edith sends the letter to his Excellency the Turkish (Ottoman) Ambassador in London.
Thomas and O'Brien betrayed themselves with their behaviour to Anna and Bates who in turn, turn the tables on them.
 The bastard’s hidden it in my room or yours.
 Why did I ever listen to you in the first place?
Bates hasn't hidden it in their rooms, but he’s made them believe it. It's interesting again, how O'Brien blames the fiasco on Thomas. 
*  Everyone is sorry for Edith. Bates and Anna are sorry for her. Anna thinks she was in love in Patrick who was engaged with a Mary who didn't really want him, but she would have married him because he was the heir.
We can compare the stealing of food by Carson in the first episodes to give to his old friend who was blackmailing him and Thomas stealing the wine.
Carson is remorseful, he doesn't do it because he wants to, narratively-wise he also gets a background that justifies his actions. The audience gets to see it's an act he despises and also gets to see why he does it. 
Thomas? The audience sees him stealing wine. Why? To what purpose? We have no idea. No explanation given. None whatsoever. And it's because it's not thought. I don't know, they could have been seen drinking it with O'Brien in the roof, for all I care. Give the audience a reason as to why he steals the wine. Have Sarah asking him why she did he steal it? 
The problem is there is no actual reason for Thomas to steal wine. And it’s never used again other than seeing how he doesn’t deserve to work in the Abbey. 
I hate the wine stealing for this reason.
Interesting quotes from the episode:
Thomas: I’ve often wondered if this place is haunted. It ought to be.
Sarah:  Of the spirits of maids and footmen who died in slavery?
Bates: I always feel a bit sorry for Lady Edith.
 Anna: Me, too. Although I don’t know why, when you think what she’s got and what we haven’t.
Bates: Perhaps Mr Patrick did love her [Edith] back, he just couldn’t say it.
Sometimes we’re not at liberty to speak. Sometimes it wouldn’t be right.
Mary: Kemal? My lover. Kemal Pamuk.
Robert: She thinks, if you put a toy down, it will still be sitting there when you want to play with it again.
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thran-duils · 4 years
Text
In Your Arms (Chap 4)
Summary: Alone and pregnant, in the post apocalyptic world after your Alpha died, you’re found by the Saviors and brought to Negan’s doorstep. Negan may be the answer to your loneliness. Pairing: Omega!Fem Reader x Alpha!Negan Rating: Explicit Words: 1,292 Warnings (for the whole fic): Smut, fluff, ABO dynamics, some angst sprinkled in
Part 3 || Masterpost  || Fanfic masterpost
“Are you afraid?” a voice sounded behind you.
Turning, you faced the voice. You came face to face with a young man, who was peering closely at you.
“Of?”
He gestured at your stomach. “The baby.”
Shrugging, you admitted, “Maybe a little. It would be my first one.”
The man looked amused. “Only a little? That is brave. Although, I have typically found women can be far braver in some instances than men – even Omega – contrary to belief.”
You did not know what to say and he sensed it. Stepping further towards you, he held out his hand.
“Ariz,” he introduced himself.
Taking his hand gingerly, you returned timidly, “Y/N.”
Ariz’s eyes crinkled, his smile wide and friendly. His artfully messy hair brushed his shoulders, coal in color. The skin was chaffed at his hands and you wondered if it had been like that before or an adaption due to hard work since the world fell apart.
“Well, what good are we guards if you’re not all that afraid?”
“Uh,” you started thinking. “I mean, I can’t run as fast as I used to, so I’ll need someone covering my back.”
Chortling, Ariz stated, “Good point. Although I’m sure Negan doesn’t want you running anywhere.”
You could not hold back a smile at this admittance. “Nor do I.”
“Or the baby, I’m sure. Be a bit of a bumpy ride for it, I imagine.” Reaching into his bag, he retrieved a small serving of bread. “One of the kitchen folk were instructed to tell me that I was in charge of bringing this to you. Took a bit to track you down, so it’s cooled a bit.”
“I’m sorry.”
Shaking his head, “Gets me outta patrol and having to listen to those creepy assholes growling outside for a bit. Don’t be sorry.”
Nodding in agreement, you told him, “Yeah, I don’t care much for them either. But Negan said it’s safe…”
Ariz looked amused, closing his bag. “Doesn’t sound like you’re that convinced.”
“Are you?”
“Course not. It is not good to ever feel completely safe in this world. But, I can tell you that I feel a hell of a lot safer inside these gates and walls than outside.” He swallowed, contemplating his next words. Leaning in, he told you quietly, “There’s some… questionable people that live here. But overall, this place is really what we call it. A Sanctuary. You just gotta stay on your toes and fall in line with the right people.”
Picking at the bread, you asked, “You mind telling me who those people are?”
“Well, me, for starters.” He grinned broadly, leaning away again.
You cocked an eyebrow, “You know, that seems like something exactly someone who was not the right type of person would say to throw me off.”
Aziz let out a hearty laugh. His eyes twinkled with amusement as he said, “No wonder you survived as long as you did outside on your own. You’re not an idiot. That’s good. Well, yes, that could be a tactic someone would use. But, could you just take my word for it that I’m just looking out for you? Not just for your sake, but for Negan’s. Gotta keep the boss happy and he’s lost enough as it is.”
His statement arose questions but you refrained from asking them. Instead, you conceded and nodded. “I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt.”
“Lovely,” Aziz said cheerfully. “You enjoy that bread now. Make sure you eat the whole thing. You are eating for two now.”
With that, he turned on his heel, leaving you. You watched his retreating back, digesting what he meant about not wanting Negan to lose anymore. Were you already being seen as his?
<> <> <>
Aziz’s arm was tight around you as he struggled to help you down the hallway. Grunting, he asked for the umpteenth time it felt like, “You sure you don’t want me to carry you?”
You gasped out, “No. I told you! It’ll just make it worse!”
He had come to you to check in and bring you your lunch as he had for the last month. It had become a routine, he never seemed to be bothered about taking time out of his day to cater to your meal. The two of you had begun chatting over the time, learning bits and pieces about each other. You learned about how he had lost his husband, just like you. How he had traveled halfway across the country to get to where you were at now before settling with the Saviors. The two of you had become close.
And now here he was escorting you to Dr. Carson. You had been uncomfortable this morning and the pain had gotten worse quickly. He noticed the moment he approached you and when you said you thought you were in labor, he had taken to action quickly.
“Where the hell is – Gerard!”
One of the other Saviors had turned the corner and stalled, looking at the pair of you in shock. You were sure you looked a sight, breathing heavily and sweating up a storm.
“Hey! Help me! We need to get her to Dr. Carson ASAP. Baby is coming!” Aziz ordered Gerard.
Everything became a blur as the pain increased. It lasted for hours – that felt like an eternity. But in the end you awoke groggily, finding Dr. Carson handing you a small bundle.
“How many drugs am I on?” you murmured, not feeling quite right.
“You telling me you shouldn’t be holding the baby?” Carson tried to joke. You held the bundle closer and he chuckled warmly. “You’ll start to feel better soon. I gave you a pretty high dose of pain medication.”
“Is that safe for the baby?”
“Shouldn’t bother her too much,” Carson said reassuringly. “But, you can wait a bit before you try to breastfeed. You should rest a little more.”
Looking down at your arms, you smiled seeing your baby yawn, her little fingers flexing.
“Well, would you look at that.”
Your gaze moved to the door where Negan had walked in. His smile was bright, taking in the scene. Instantly, you felt safer having him near. He came to the side of the bed, peering down at you.
“You mind?” he asked, gesturing at the little girl.
Shaking your head, you loosened your grip on her. Despite trusting him, your heart beat quicker when he reached down and wrapped his hands around her tiny frame. You felt colder when she was taken from you, your eyes trained on Negan bringing her close to his chest.
You watched his eyes crinkle, adoration in his expression. He was gentle as he cradled her.
His eyes flicked back to you and he asked, “You thought of a name yet?”
“I didn’t know what the sex was going to be,” you reminded him. “But… I had a few names in mind.” He looked at you expectantly. “But… I think I like Naomi.”
Negan teased, “Choosing an ‘N’ name after me?” Your cheeks reddened and he chuckled, “I’m only teasing, Y/N. I think it’s a pretty name. Good choice. Right, Naomi? Mommy is smart, giving a beautiful name to a beautiful little girl.”
A smile tugged at the corner of your lips as he carefully leaned down to hand her back.
“I’m gonna stay in here with you for a bit if you don’t mind.”
“Of course I don’t.”
Negan took a seat and said, “Good. Just gonna watch over you the first few nights.” To Carson he said, “Not that I don’t trust you. But, I think I’ll feel safer being right here making sure Y/N is being well cared for.” To you, he said, “And of course Naomi.”
~~~
Tags: @daniissuchadani @mblaqgi @astrobabezblog @sleepyartistsworld 
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hopevalley · 3 years
Text
Season 8, Episode 1: Open Season
Work was busier than expected on Monday, but the deep dive into the first episode of S8 begins now!
Scene 1: Narration, Elizabeth and Nathan, Lucas
The awkwardness between Elizabeth and Nathan was...palpable at first lol.The best part about the non-narrated part of the scene is twofold: Nathan interacting with Jack is a well-needed and very nice touch, and of course it’s always nice to see that Nathan is patient concerning Elizabeth’s situation and reassures her that she can let him know when she’s ready to go to dinner with him.
My problem with the whole thing is that...if she hasn’t spoken up about wanting that dinner date yet, and she’s not saying yes she’d like to get dinner with you now, it’s like...any sane person would assume at this point in the story that Elizabeth isn’t interested in Nathan. Worse, Nathan isn’t the kind of man who wouldn’t take a hint. I’m pretty sure this is why the opening scene felt just a little bit off. I think they ought to have let Elizabeth be a little more enthusiastic about the idea while still failing to commit to it. 
To be fair to the writers, I can’t imagine it was easy for them to figure out how to open this season after such a long time gap. They let a whole winter elapse between last season and this one. How do you explain literally no major development with the love triangle in that amount of time? Especially after the way the last season ended?
Random consideration: the camera focuses on Elizabeth’s face a lot and makes her wedding ring clearly visible.
Boom, the flashback with Lucas. I think having him leave out of jealousy was a better idea than having his mother fall ill (we’ve certainly seen that enough at this point), and maybe we should also consider the fact that while Lucas was gone, Nathan didn’t really jump on the opportunity to woo Elizabeth himself.
I wonder if we’ll get an explanation for that or not. What makes Lucas so sure that after 4+ months, Elizabeth hasn’t started courting Nathan? Maybe he kept in touch with someone in town? Or he just knows Elizabeth well enough to know she wouldn’t feel quite ready to commit in that time frame anyway?
I did really like Lucas’s opening scene with Elizabeth. Honestly, he was quite likable, here: admitting he was wrong, admitting his shortcomings, apologizing. All good things. “I’m ashamed I let my jealousy get the best of me... The worst of me.” That’s such a good line.
It didn’t feel equal in enthusiasm to the Nathan scene, but I’ll have more thoughts on that later. I do believe it was on purpose.
--
Scene 2: Clara and Jesse’s Fight, The Café
I like the concept of some marital discord for Clara and Jesse. Marriage is easier said than done and like any serious relationship, it’s a lot of consistent maintenance. It starts out pretty well, with Jesse sleeping in the other bedroom. At this point I fully expected to find out Clara kicks in her sleep or she snores a lot or something that’s funny to hear about but really difficult to actually deal with in real life. Color me disappointed later, but I’ll get to it.
--
Scene 3: The Mercantile, Ned, Florence, Carson
This just set up things with Faith’s situation so there’s not much to say, but as always I do love Florence. I hope she gets some good scenes this season. And I love Ned so I hope the same for him.
Henry coming in to mail a letter was interesting, though. I’m not sure it’ll mean anything in particular later, but...it’s possible.  Then again, maybe he’s just here to set our expectations regarding Faith’s return (of course it’s a long trip from Chicago) or Carson’s worry (a bit unreasonable unless he expected to hear from her at a specific stop).
--
Scene 4: Nathan, Dylan
Dylan is such an incredible scumbag. The spurs were a nice touch. He says things almost fondly (“She’s growing up... My little girl.”) and then wants nothing to actually do with Allie. 
The guy’s actually a pretty good actor. The way he segues into being glad for Allie’s sake that Nathan wasn’t the one killed. If the next words out of his mouth weren’t a demand for go-away money you’d almost feel those words were genuine!
--
Scene 5: Lee and Rosemary’s Return + Faith’s Return + Dylan Part Two
Lots of energy in this scene, both good and bad. I always appreciate what Lee and Rosemary bring to the show. I genuinely just don’t care that much about Faith. I’m ready to ship her with Cowboy Brett Brewer. He gets a name, which makes me wonder if he’s gonna show up again. :3
Lol at Carson’s jelly face:
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I MEAN...
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Not a fan of Faith’s outfit...but to be fair we’ve never really seen Faith outside of uniform. That just doesn’t strike me as something she would wear to travel in...?
Dylan approaching Jack and Jack speaking to him was so hilarious to me. “A puppy!” It’s extra funny after he looked afraid of Rosemary. Nathan intervening was undoubtedly for the best, but I can’t imagine why he would have approached Elizabeth or Jack. He doesn’t know who they are, or their connection to Nathan. Maybe too convenient. Might have been better to have him approach someone else entirely--like Opal.
--
Scene 6: Nathan and Allie
It’s great Nathan’s officializing the adoption but he had literal years to do this and only chooses now, when there’s a threat? Legally Dylan doesn’t have a leg to stand on even in that day and age (he did the abandoning in the first place + Nathan is a lawman)... It kind of ruined the cute moment for me, and I think it will come back in a bad way later.
I don’t mind Nathan’s inability to confide in Elizabeth in this situation. At this point, she doesn’t need to know, and the situation is just weird enough that he probably doesn’t think he needs to dump his own problems on her.
--
Scene 7: Carson and Faith
I’m the jerk who just chanted “BREAK UP BREAK UP BREAK UP” during this scene in my head. I just...don’t care about Faith and Carson.
--
Scene 8: Bill and The Gals
I hate that they keep retconning Bill’s ability to cook well with every passing season. In season 2 and 3 he was more than satisfactory. In S4 he made dinner for Dottie and it was really nice. Now he’s godawful and doesn’t taste his own shit before letting other people try it? Come on.
This is the kind of stuff the writing team needs to cut out of the story. It’s not funny. 
Worse, outspoken Fiona lying to Bill? I just don’t see it. At least Molly told him the truth...but I still am just SO tired of seeing this shit. It makes me think new writers only watched the last couple of seasons instead of all of them.
Also, if Bill is literally running the cafe most of the time, if he was bad at cooking, then...the place would have shut down ages ago. What they should lean into if they wanna do a cooking joke is that Bill isn’t good at creating recipes from scratch. Maybe he doesn’t have a strong sense of taste (my husband has this issue so it’s the first thing that comes to mind) so he’s likely to over-do things like spice or sugar or salt on accident. There’s also a lot of room for jokes about his “taste” in things that can come of it (women, clothes, et cetera).
--
Scene 9: Lee’s Pants
Good scene, 10/10, wouldn’t change a thing. I hope this pants thing becomes a running gag. This is the good kind of humor I want in my life. And I like that Jesse wants to emulate Lee. It’s wholesome. 
--
Scene 10: Rosemary and Clara
The ribbon as a tissue was funny, but it was just SLIGHTLY too over the top for me.
--
Scene 11: Faith and Carson Again...............
“Were you jealous of that cowboy?” I think he should be. The cowboy is better. I don’t give a damn about these characters. And I genuinely hate that the strumming is Carson’s Thing Now. At the very least we should get some Carson and Bill doing a duet together which would be cool.
It just felt like it was shilling Paul and had nothing to do with the characters.
--
Scene 12: Mmm Money
This is arguably the most interesting scene in the episode. Lucas nodded at Nathan. Nathan went to Lucas for money. Lucas didn’t need to get the scoop to find out why Nathan needed it to loan it to him. Elizabeth is officially the least interesting part of the love triangle.
They treat her like she’s such a prize to be won, but I’m starting to worry that she’s become the new Lorigail on the show.
Anyway this scene had some gay vibes and I liked them.
--
Scene 13: Rosemary and Elizabeth Catch Up
YES. GOOD SCENE. It starts off fun and it gets serious, and the transition feels really natural. “Did he have reason to be [jealous]?” I’m genuinely glad this is in the episode. It needed to be. I hope Rosemary continues to ask the hard questions.
Elizabeth needs to face either dating one of them, or dating neither of them so that everybody can get on with their lives. If you’re not that enthusiastic about either of them I’d say...maybe don’t date either of them idk.
--
Scene 14: Nathan and Bill Talk
"If he sees you with me, then...” The problem with this scene is uh...twofold, let’s say.
Issue 1: ThEN HE WILL WHAT, NATHAN? WHAT HAS HE EVER DONE BEFORE THAT WAS SO BAD if he’s not a hard criminal? Maybe an example would be useful here...?
Issue 2: The old Bill Avery would have heard “if he SEES YOU with ME” and mentally been like, “all right so it’s only bad if he SEES ME” and spied on Nathan.
Nathan wanting Bill to stay behind in case Dylan doubles back isn’t a terrible idea, but it almost comes across more like...the writers just want Nathan alone.
--
Scene 15: Oil
I like the discussion and that Hickam gets to do something. I feel like Henry is low-key advising against shooting the well, and that Lucas and Hickam will end up doing it and causing an issue. It’s just setting up for the future and it’s nice to see those kinds of scenes in the series again!
--
Scene 16: Jesse and Lee
I’d like this scene more if I felt it gave us ANY insight into the problem Jesse and Clara are having. It mostly comes across like Jesse gets home and does nothing at all until bedtime and Clara is lonely. Could have been a better scene. It’s mostly just repetitive right now.
--
Scene 17: Nathan Cancels the Date
“Tomorrow’s Saturday.” Nathan’s like uhhhhh. This actually works really well to do what it’s supposed to do. By that I mean, he seems “off” so Elizabeth realizes he’s a bit stressed and leaving town = mountie business = dangerous.
I kind of wish Rosemary and Elizabeth would talk more about this, but maybe that’s coming in an episode soon...?
--
Scene 18: The Barbershop
Just a cute nice scene that shows a good friendship between Fiona, Clara, and Faith. I like this stuff. Keep it coming, Hallmark!
--
(Skipping Scene 19 because it’s just Nathan riding around...)
--
Scene 20: Lee and Rosemary Scheme
I really enjoyed this little bit where they decide to buy something for Clara and Jesse and we don’t get to see what it is. Super wholesome and very fun!
--
Scene 21: Nathan gets Ambushed
This scene was absolutely wild. Probably one of the best scenes like this that they’ve ever done. Dylan taking Nathan’s hat, “Take care of my little girl” after he takes the money and Nathan’s gun. It was super good.
Also, not too fake that Nathan was on the ground that long. If you got roped off of your horse you’d have the wind knocked out of you super hard lmao.
--
Scene 22: Bill & The Girls
Clara and Fiona are so cute. Bill playing the “Dad” figure to them both is really nice and it’s good for him. “I’m a lawman. I get to sneak.” What a Bill response. 
--
(Skipping Scene 23 since it’s just Nathan finding his horse.)
--
Scene 24: Lucas visits with Elizabeth
Lucas and Elizabeth are flirting via a nursery rhyme. I...don’t like that LOL. But Lucas’s “Helen Bouchard taught me to read and after that I was on my own.” She really sounds unloving. This was a pretty decent scene, though.
Also, Grand Isle Louisiana had a major hurricane in 1909 and 1915.
They also seem to have been hit by more mild hurricanes in 1916 and 1917, but the 1915 one was a Cat4, so...the most notable.
--
Scene 25: Rosemary and Lee in the Dress Shop
This tries to solve the issue of Clara and Jesse’s marital problems, but it doesn’t actually do that. “Let Jesse read when he gets home.” “I’ll talk to Jesse.” Meh.
--
Scene 26: Barbershop
“Why do this when you’re so good with women’s hair?” I fully expected Fiona to say, “That’s where all the hot gossip is, of course.” I do like  her gumption, though!
--
Scene 27: Nathan Finds Dylan
“I had to let you ambush me, so I had grounds to put you away.” COLD BUT EFFECTIVE. I appreciate this.
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Imagine getting to be this smug. I wish it were me.
Anyway, long-term thoughts on this are mostly that...there is just no reasonable way Dylan’s story is over yet. It’s too juicy of a storyline to let go this easily. Allie is going to find out what Nathan did and she’s going to struggle to come to terms with it, especially after her grandfather really did try to turn his life around. Why couldn’t it be the same for her father? Why couldn’t she get lucky like that?
I hope it feels satisfying, whatever they choose to do. Otherwise this was just wrapped up too neatly/too quickly.
--
Scene 28: Nathan Returns
Very good scene. Nathan’s in a good mood and he does my favorite trope of all time when one person in the relationship has a child: “Why don’t we all go?” You already all know each other, so why not? It’s wholesome and good, and it shows he doesn’t care how he gets to spend time with Elizabeth, as long as he does.
Also, it takes a lot of the pressure off of her for the duration of the date and at its conclusion. This was a cute and good scene, one of the better they’ve had, I think.
--
Scene 29: Jesse and Lee Talk
This was a nice attempt at a talk, but it really comes off like Jesse has stopped loving Clara for no reason. That his romantic interest in her is what is causing the failure in their relationship.
The problem is: WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS CAUSING IT. NOBODY EVER SAID. 
I agree that love isn’t “just” a feeling or “just” an emotion. It’s ALSO a choice. Marriage is a commitment you choose to continue every day. That is all good.
“Choose love. Then you feel it.” is probably some of the worst dialogue they’ve put in the show, though. Yuck. It left a bad taste in my mouth. It feels like it’s shaming people who legitimately fall out of love or who are in bad relationships. “If only you chose to work harder.”
I don’t think that was their intention at all, but it really soured the scene. I would have MUCH rather have had Lee get Jesse to talk about what’s wrong and then offer him pointers on how he could do better. Maybe he’s stressed out and losing himself in books, or he wishes Clara would sit and read with him because that’s something he always wanted. Or maybe Clara would be down for reading time if he read to her while she did her sewing.
There’s so much they could have done here to really send this home, but it didn’t work very well. At the very least Lee could have said, instead of ‘choose love’: CHOOSE COMMUNICATION. Make sure she knows you still feel that way about her.
The biggest thing is like, Lee could also be very encouraging in saying like, the honeymoon phase doesn’t last forever but just because things settle down doesn’t mean the love is less.
THERE IS SO MUCH GOOD STUFF THEY COULD HAVE WRITTEN FOR THIS but they chose “Choose love. Then you feel it.” WTF. That’s awful advice.
--
Scene 30: Jesse and Clara
Him bringing her flowers was a nice touch, and her getting him the book was also nice. The tandem bike was SO unexpected to me and I loved it. It’s just goofy enough that it works. The best part is that they know it’s not going to fix anything, but it’s still a fun and nice thing to do, and that’s wonderful for Rosemary and Lee. They both like to make the people they care about happy.
--
Scene 31: Mama Bouchard
MILF ALERT.
Elizabeth is just so shook at all of this she doesn’t say a damn thing for so long it made my palms feel sweaty.
“Someone ought to take an interest in your writing, don’t you think?” I rewatched the episode to understand the tone, and it’s a little hoity-toity/uppity, but she actually doesn’t sound condescending. It’s good for an editor to meet the author, after all, and meet to talk about their writing/book. This has always been custom, even in the early 1900s. Authors didn’t usually get their work published by an editor they’d never met (though of course, you will find some exceptions). 
From the little we saw, Helen seems fine. The preview for the next episode tells us she’s UH, AN EDITOR DOING HER JOB, so I’m not looking forward to the editor being the bad guy, but I guess I’ll have to deal with that when it arrives. (To be clear, Elizabeth has never proved to the audience that she’s a Good Writer, let alone a Great Writer. She’s also not experienced which means her work probably NEEDS SOME WORK.)
Anyway, Elizabeth is immediately rude as HELL. Nobody can make an excuse for this. Helen isn’t THAT big of a deal. There are other publishers. Your father is filthy rich. If she changes her mind about your book you can pub to someone via your father if you have to. Like...Helen wouldn’t have taken you on if she didn’t see any potential in you. 
Even if it was a big deal, Elizabeth has NEVER been a flake. EVER. 
This is a classic case of a writer forcing the character to go out of character in order to bend to what the plot dictates. 
If I were Nathan, I’d drop Elizabeth like a brick.
How to fix this scene? I’ll honestly have to think about that for a while. This was the first hint of truly bad writing this season. The bit with Lee and “choose love” was careless writing, but this scene with Nathan is just Bad.
The thing is, I KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING. I know they put this in there so that it looks like she’ll choose Lucas because she never even goes out with Nathan, and then BOOM. I know it’s meant to be this big thing about how she’s scared to feel anything for Nathan because Lucas is the safer option and also a good man (so why would she fall for the more frightening option?).
But this was not the right way to do this type of scene. I hope to God in the next episode someone says something about it. Allie could tell her it was rude and it hurt Nathan’s feelings/you shouldn’t have said yes if you didn’t want to. It’d be fully in character for her. Rosemary could also say something similar. If they do, I might be able to forgive this...but if it’s not called attention to by the other characters, then it’s a massive failure as a scene to me.
--
Did I miss anything? Do you want my thoughts on something in particular? Shoot me a message HERE and I’ll do my best to answer! 
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JULY PICKS!
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You heard me correctly, I said JULY! Whoosh, this year is going by fast-but not in a good way if you know what I mean. This will be my last monthly wrap up where I am strictly staying home in quarantine as this upcoming week I’m heading back to work in person. Wish me luck!
We had quite the range this month from newly released, reality, musical and then some favorites from last month that I’ve continued watching. Without further ado here we go....
There’s going to be PLENTY of SPOILERS this go round. ESPECIALLY with my first pick of Stargirl. You’ve been warned!!!
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DC’S STARGIRL
I need to talk about 1x10 or I’m going to burst!!! As stated above there will be A LOT of SPOILERS IN THIS POST!! So scroll down to the next picture if you don’t want it to be spoiled. 
You’ve been warned...again.
IT CANNOT END LIKE THAT!!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME???? Henry! Wow! 1) Epic fighting 2) The backstory and how he wasn’t going to give up on his dad AND THEN how he wouldn’t give into his dad. 3) HE DIED RATHER THAN JOIN HIS SIDE OR PRETEND (which I honestly felt was going to happen). His character arc and I can’t believe it’s over!!! 4) His speech at the end: *weeping.* I knew Brainwave was going to say he killed his mother. It just felt like the build up. Brainwave Jr. would have been a GREAT ADDITION TO THE JSA! AND OMG THE WAY THE REST OF THEM FOUGHT FOR HIM! I loved how they framed it so you could still see them in the back when Henry spoke to his father. Super heartbreaking. Man, it feels like a lot of people have been killed off this first season (or am I just still thinking about Joey?) 
Side note: Check out the Instagram Live between father and son Brainwave on Stargirl’s CW page. Jake Austin Walker did an AWESOME interview in his take over.
This was one of the strongest episodes overall and definitely one of my favorites so far. I agree with many others that while it is SOO GOOD and I want to rewatch it again, I don’t know if I can emotionally yet. I can’t remember the last time I felt that way about a show. 
Some other thoughts this episode: WAY TO GO BARBARA! Way to record them to translate later (such an awesome app btw, how do I get it?). I’m glad her and Pat came more to an understanding because I love them especially with that glimpse into how they met. Jordan’s parents give me the creeps, like the couple from The Visit vibes. I feel like Mike’s got to find out ASAP, especially because he’s spent time in the garage. Something’s got to show him the truth; because I’m really feeling he figures it out rather than being told. Very curious to see what his reaction will be. SOLOMON GRUNDY. Thank God Beth talked Rick down. She really is like Chuck in being the voice of reason. She did really well in the cafeteria too. While I still don’t believe Starman is Courtney’s dad, how cute was it when she put together her and Henry were cousins? Speaking of Court’s dad, who else didn’t feel like Starman was her dad until they saw that upcoming promo? I don’t know who that impostor is but he is not her dad. Something’s fishy.
Loving this show. So happy it’s renewed for a second season!! 
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THE 100
From a show I can’t get enough of to one whose final season is a disappointment. I’m not going to spend too much time talking about The 100 because I feel I’ll just be repeating myself from previous posts. However, I did want to include it because I haven’t spoken much about the previous 2 episodes that I wound up watching back to back and I didn’t overly dislike them. 
As many have complained, when you have a final season you shouldn’t introduce SO MANY new characters and just push aside your originals (or the ones who are left). You also shouldn’t include so many confusing plots that are making it look like were the main points overall (like this many world concept was around since the first grounders) and playing with time in so many episodes is hard to keep up with too. Having so many people separated makes it difficult to remember what just happened to this specific group because I haven’t seen them in forever. ANYWAY, I did promise some positives. I didn’t except to like 7x08 because of it being a flashback episode with brand new people that was just going to feel like a potential spin-off pilot. Well...I actually really enjoyed it and the concept that the bunker was used before One Crew. The characters were easy to like and it was cool seeing Allie again (and this time not as the villain). While it felt forced including the orb (is that what it’s called? If not that’s what I’m calling it), but I liked how all the other pieces fit together (ex: the flame, the grounders’ language). Honestly, I surprise myself to say this, but I’d watch another episode. For 7x09, I liked being on Bardo and watching Octavia, Echo, Diyoza and Hope slowly get “brainwashed” I mean trained. We all knew it wouldn’t work for Hope and if I was them I would rather be on Sky Ring than Bardo (but then I guess I’d go crazy, so...) I enjoy the Octavia and Levitt relationship and would love them to work out, but if this show taught you anything it’s to be skeptical. I also want to shift to the Primes plot, just to showcase John Murphy for a second. THAT MAN! What a character development he’s had on this show. From the first season where I was like come on Murphy to now me awaiting his scenes. From cockroach to someone who won’t view himself as a hero. So good and something that is fantastic about this final season. They might have forgotten about other characters, but they’re doing it right by Murphy. 
Well, that was more than I was expecting. ;)   
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THE CIRCLE
It feels like I haven’t watched a lot of reality TV this year, which makes sense because of our quarantine situation (but then again I’m watching World of Dance, but that’s a different because it’s more of a competition/dance show. I’ll stop rambling). The Circle is a reality ‘game’ show that could be easily completed during quarantine and social distancing because the contestants do not see each other in person. They each have an apartment in this complex and only communicate with each other on a social media platform called the Circle. The objective is to become the most popular and an influencer who gets power over who stays and who goes in the competition. There’s some side contests throughout, but most of the show is just people chatting through an insta messenger and trying to learn as much as they can. Alliances are formed and cat fishes try to thrive all for the grand prize of $100,000. (Wow, that’s a lot!) It is SUPER addicting and very funny. Having a voice-over narrator really makes it even funnier because she says what we’re all thinking. Just about every episode a contestant leaves and then is able to meet one other person in their apartment. It’s been cool seeing their reactions as oftentimes it’s someone they did not expect AT ALL. I can’t wait to finish it. If you’re a fan of Big Brother than this is definitely for you. Looks like there will be a second season, which I am excited about.  
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THE BABYSITTERS CLUB
Jumping from one Netflix show to another. Released on Netflix on July 3rd, I tried not to binge it all in one day because then it would be over (and we still don’t know if there will be a second season yet). This is definitely my feel good watch for July. If you want something that’s a quick watch and just wholesome and fun to escape our current world than this is for you. I always felt so happy after watching and couldn’t wait to watch another. While I was familiar with the franchise--the 90s movie and of course the books (although I was more of a Babysitter Little Sister fan, so I was very excited to see Karen), you don’t have to have any knowledge of the Babysitters Club to enjoy this show. I was hooked just about right away by this new series shown by me watching the first three episodes back to back. I really like how they set up each episode with one girl as the main focus (just like in the books) where she takes over the voice-over narration. Great representation and made modern to fit in with our current times. The first example that comes to mind is when Mary Ann babysits Bailey who is transgender. I liked how Bailey says those are her old clothes while they’re playing. It’s shown in a way that explains the situation without feeling like a lecture. It fits so naturally into the episode. And then Mary Ann’s speech at the hospital is super powerful for both Bailey and herself. This is just one example of how well represented this show is. Extremely strong cast and actresses who are the proper ages. I also love the adult casting and how they threw in a Clueless reference from Alicia Sliverstone (who plays Kristy’s Mom). As someone who is writing for this age group, I really liked hearing and seeing how authentic this show is. 
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FEEL THE BEAT
A Netflix original movie that has been on my list for a while that I just got around to watching. It didn’t come out too long ago. In the film, Sofia Carson’s character is a dancer who is a perfectionist. She gets on the bad side of a big NYC producer when she not only leaves her in the rain as she steals her taxi, but also knocks her, accidentally, off stage and becomes a viral video-this basically blackmails her in Broadway. This all happens within about the first 10 minutes of the film and the majority takes place back in her small home town (very Hallmark-like) in Wisconsin. While there her old dancing teacher wants her to share her Broadway wisdom with her young students. Meanwhile Carson has only been a chorus girl, so she doesn’t really have any. What draws her to helping the young girls is the chance to perform in front of a big choreographer that could get her to be the star she always dreamed of. The catch is that it’s the teacher dance in the childrens dance competition. While this might sound like a movie you’ve watched many times before, it was still worth it and a really fun watch. I think the kids really make the movie. They are adorable, funny and super talented. You feel connected with them really fast and want to see them succeed. I loved Dickie and how he joined the group. I think he was my favorite overall. I loved how inclusive the cast was here too (just like BSC) from a mixed race family, to single parents and even a student who was Deaf. It was great seeing the other actors sign to her. Carson’s character, April, can be annoying at times, but you understand it’s her character and something she needs to overcome. As I said before the plot may seem familiar, but the ending was something I didn’t see coming. Overall, wholesome, feel good and fun for the whole family. You can consider to watch while babysitting. (See what I did there??)  
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VIOLETTA SEASON 2
She’s back! I know last month when I included Violetta it was mainly me being excited to see the second season FINALLY streaming on Disney Plus. I had watched a few episodes (remember there’s 80 altogether, so even if I watched 20 that’s still very early on and just a dent in the season) and was still getting used to this season. Well, now I’m happy to report I am in the 40s and more than half way. For a bit I was watching many of these episodes a day, which told me that I was loving it again. Recently, I feel I need a little more of a push to watch, but it’s mainly because of certain story-lines that feel like they’re dragging. (For example: Violetta’s voice. One minute it’s fine and the next she’s like dying). For this section I have two words: LOVE TRIANGLES. And I’m not just talking about Violetta, Diego and Leon. For a bit it felt like each character had their own love triangle, which honestly I was loving. These characters have definitely developed a lot from last season, which allows this to happen. Olga was in a love triangle, which just recently got resolved. I think German is still in one because of his alter ego Jeremias. Jackie was “kind of” in one. For her it was more of a misunderstanding, which is very classic on this show. Lots more secrets have been uncovered in these episodes as well as songs! You know how excited I am for those. Overall, I think I’m still enjoying season 1 songs more (which get referenced enough in this season), but some of the season 2 ones are really growing on me. Specifically Leon’s Entre dos mundos and when he sings with Diego Euphoria in English. Also, Yo Soy Asi has been real catchy. I know Frederico will be coming back soon and I can’t wait to see him again!  
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HAMILTON
Like many I watched Hamilton this month-actually on the day it came out. It’s been a musical that I’ve been intrigued by, but never thought I’d get a chance to watch because of how popular and expensive it is to see on Broadway. So, I was very excited to hear I’d get the chance when it was to be released in theaters for a special event. Then because of Corona it was released to Disney Plus, which was EVEN more convenient and exciting. I really enjoyed it and watched it twice within the same week. I immediately downloaded the playlist and started singing it around the house. I do this a lot with many of the plays I see, but depending how good they are is shown by how long I listen to the soundtrack. (Some of my top ones are Bandstand, Once, Newsies and Anastasia.) Because there are so many songs in Hamilton it is taking me a little longer to know all the words, but I feel pretty confident with the first act. It was the perfect timing for this to be released on Disney Plus. Not only because it was July 3rd, but also because of the world we are living in. Lin’s diverse cast brings to life the world of 1776 and the revolutionary war (as well as the time after it), but it’s such a strong commentary on our world today. This is something I am continually noticing with historical dramas/pieces being released within the last 5-10 years. It feels like there’s more we can say in this genre than in a commentary piece. I also like all the analysis videos I’ve seen popping up, which just make it even more powerful. (Like it being Eliza’s story and her putting herself back in the narrative. That the play Hamilton is named for both her and Alexander.) I don’t know if all of what I see were intentional, but  either way well done. I hope it doesn’t leave Disney Plus soon. 
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1917
And lastly, 1917. I promised quite the range this month and you can see that’s definitely the case. I always enjoy watching war films and with 1917 there was so much hype (both before it came out and after) that I was interested to give it a watch. Giving the movie to my dad for father’s day felt like the perfect excuse to be able to watch it. Even though our DVD stuck in a few places (still don’t know if it was the player or the DVD itself), the film was very entertaining and I would suggest it to anyone who is a history/film buff. Taking place in WWI, we follow two British soldiers as they attempt to deliver a message about an upcoming ambush that could take countless lives. I feel that I often watch more films revolving around WWII, so it was very interesting to be immersed in the first great war. After watching I am not surprised that the film was up for so many Oscars. While cinematography is the first thing everyone discusses when it comes to this movie (and it should be because the one shot/long shot is sooo impressive and beautiful to watch. It really brings you into the scene and has a way of making you feel like you’re there too. There’s a realness to it that’s raw and new compared to other war films I’ve watched in the past), there’s so much more to this film too. First, I like how it connects back to Sam Mendes’ grandfather, so while it’s not a true story it has real facts in it. I LOVE the score and music to this film. In the scene where George Mackay runs at night through those ruined buildings I could really hear how well the music worked with the action. Because of this I made sure to listen to some of the soundtrack and now I’ve added some of the songs into my writing playlist. I have chills just thinking about it. The other point I want to bring up is the cast! While there are SO MANY big names in this film from Colin Firth to Benedict Cumberbatch, the two main characters are played by George Mackay and Dean Charles Chapman and they are the ones with the most screen time. If their chemistry and acting wasn’t so great then the movie wouldn’t be as successful as it is. Because of this I have been watching non-stop YouTube interviews of the two of them for this film. 
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They are so well-spoken, stand-up guys and I can’t get enough of their dialogues with each other and others. (You should watch these interviews too). While familiar with Chapman’s time on Game of Thrones, I haven’t seen him in much else, so I’m excited to see what he’ll have in the future (as well as checking out his IMDB page). For Mckay, I’ve seen him before when I just watched Ophelia earlier this summer so that was my first time watching him act. After that film I was curious what else he was in, but it was only after 1917 that I started doing more research. So far, I’ve only been able to watch the short film he was in called Infinite. While only 17 minutes it was very strong and deep. I highly recommend. As I’ve shared on this page already, in another post, the more I hear him talk the more of a crush I am developing. It’s been a long time since I’ve experienced a celebrity crush this strong so soon. This quarantine has to end so I can make it to England to just casually bump into him like one does. :) 
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