#i knew going in [REDACTED] dies. like everyone has known for forever. it was still sad to watch | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

copperpieceharlot · 3 years

Note

Bud I’m sorry to swing into your inbox uninvited like this but my soul is having an OOTS renaissance thanks to your content in the tag and did you say Leverage AU

haha holy SHIT this got Long. but yes. i’ve been. Thinking. (also literally Never feel like you have to apologize for sending me messages. i was Hoping someone would ask me about this. now i have an Excuse to share EVERYTHING ive written abt it :3)

Obviously, Roy is the leader/brains of the outfit. He grew up having some Strong Opinions abt what’s Legal versus what’s Right due to tragic backstory involving the death of his little brother which was definitely SOMEONE’S fault for negligence but since there technically wasn’t any illegal behavior, there were no consequences for it. Also he’s still angry at his dad bc he thinks his dad is also partly culpable (and also also just a dick). He’s the Moral Backbone of the team (alongside Durkon, more on that later) in basically the same way Nate was in og Leverage. He’s actually not the best at figuring out what people want (that’s Haley and, shockingly, occasionally Elan), but once he has that info, he is the absolute best at figuring out the ideal plan of attack to use in any given case.

Haley is still a thief. I mean she maps to Parker almost PERFECTLY. Her dad was a thief & a conman, her mom wasn’t but knew about it and mostly accepted it, but she died tragically in a mugging gone wrong or smth, which made Ian crank the paranoia WAY up and taught Haley to do the same in the name of “safety”. Let’s keep the “Ian is in Trouble and Haley needs money, Fast” which is why she signs on to the first job in the first place. She’s less acrobatic than Parker, tending towards finding (or making) weak spots in security, but she can still make a tumble check when she needs to.

Elan is the grifter who is somehow an Idiot but also not???? It baffles everyone. When he’s playing a part for a con, he’s FLAWLESS, but then the rest of the time he’s just. No Thoughts Head Empty. He probably gets lured in initially because he’s decided to try his hand at being part of a full team, rather than the two-man cons he’s been running that invariably end w his partner conning him as well and stealing half of his take. Also he likes the idea of being Crime Friends. He’s that tweet where it’s like, Roy: “after the heist is over, we split up and never communicate again” / Elan: [about to unveil his Crime Buddies Forever Friendship Quilt Puppets]: “never?”

Vaarsuvius is the hacker/gadget person. They have a Vaguely Snobby Yet Unidentifiable accent, dyed(?) purple hair (nobody has ever seen their roots) and nobody knows who they “really” are or where they came from, but they’re good at what they do so everyone just accepts the mystery. They probably got suckered into the team by their initial employer (who I’ll get to Eventually, lol) framing it as a challenge to their intellect, like, “oh, I see, you’re not smart enough to make this team work for you...” to which they were like Fucking Watch Me and also melted his computer. Anyways. They are joined (digitally) by their Intrepid Friend And Co-Conspirator (his words, not theirs), a fellow hacker known only as Blackwing, or, on certain forums, Blackwing_Bird. (In the first season, V only occasionally references him when saying they’re “calling in extra help” or smth for a particularly complex hack job. He starts showing up a little more in s2 and eventually by the start of s4 is a regular & established presence, but only appears as actions in a computer interface or output.) Elan is convinced he’s an AI, Belkar doesn’t think he actually exists, Haley pretends she doesn’t think he exists, and Durkon and Roy try not to think about it too hard, as long as B and V still get the job done.

Belkar is the hitter. He is on the team bc their initial employer got him out of jail for it. He doesn’t have a tragic backstory, he just likes doing violent crimes. As the series progresses, he grows some empathy & stuff, but really only for people who actually deserve it. Assholes still get decked. It’s all very touching. (Also he has dwarfism caused by achondroplasia. It doesn’t actually bother him and is useful in fights bc his opponents frequently have no fucking clue how to approach him, but he likes Pretending to take offense at stupid things just to see how far he can go with it.)

Aaaand last but not least, Durkon is the least involved member of the team. He’s actually a career criminal and Roy’s mentor, and wasn’t a member of the initial team that [redacted, I’ll tell you later, PROMISE] put together for a couple of reasons, the main one being that he’s Officially retired in order to spend more time with his family, which consists of his mom, his friend (not girlfriend) Hilgya, baby Kudzu, and a truly stunning number of aunts, uncles, and cousins. Roy frequently calls or visits him for advice and he Occasionally shows up to help out on local jobs, but generally he avoids doing crime if he can (as part of a deal with Hilgya, who is also a career criminal; basically, they’ve both cut back on the crime in order to provide a more stable home environment for Kudzu. But sometimes, you gotta do a little crime, and in those cases, Sigdi enjoys spending time w her grandson.)

NOW. THE BIG REVEAL YOU’VE BEEN WAITING FOR. Who got the team together in the first place?!

The answer: Lord Shojo (or whatever Normal Person Name you want to assign him). Now this is where it gets tricky: he had them do a thing that they thought was good, THEN they thought it was BAD, but then when they confronted him he revealed that it Appearing to be bad was actually a test of character and would they consider working as basically internal investigators for him? But then he had a heart attack, so, rip. But THEN it turned out that he’d left them a bunch of money anyway and they were all feeling kind of Inspired so they formed the Order of the Stick, LLC (which, no, i am not coming up with a new name, actually, because I just don’t care. someone else can come up w a justification for that name, tho, i’m sure it’s possible). Also Miko was there and was unhappy abt their actions, and also their general existence.

Moving on. Villains!

Redcloak is the Sterling replacement, because that DEEPLY amuses me.

Xykon is a season-long main villain, probably one that Redcloak finds himself working for but then “teams up with” (read: blackmails) the Order to bring him down bc even Redcloak finds Xykon distasteful. That’s season 3, let’s say.

Tarquin is another season villain, say season 2. Nale probably shows up pretty early in s1, actually, as another recurring antagonist like Sterling but uh. Less good at it. Anyways the s2 final 3 eps deal with them (accidentally) discovering that Tarquin runs some Evil Empire Company, then trying to outplay him and take him down. Idk if Nale still dies in this version tbh.

Tsukiko is a one-off s1 villain who returns briefly in s4 alongside Miko, who has gone well and truly off the rails.

Season 1 finale has to do w Roy finally getting Vengeance for his little brother.

The vampire squad is the s4 finale villain who do smth terrible to Durkon and then get the Mother Of All Revenge served up to them by the Order.

I envision the show as being 5 seasons (like og Leverage) but I’m not going to sketch out s5 because I think it should be based off whatever happens in the current story arc, possibly involving some legacy of the OotSquiggle.

Other stuff!

The Order of the Squiggle is a legendary criminal team from the 60s who stole a BUNCH of famous shit & then proceeded to legendarily implode. This has no bearing on the plot I’ve sketched out, I just think it’s fun.

The Sapphire Guard members should probably be reworked as FBI. I don’t care about most of them but I do think that Lien and O-Chul could be like, FBI agents who Choose to look the other way while the Order does their very-much-not-legal-but-still-fair Justice Crime, and maybe even help them out on occasion.

So, the Final season-by-season outline, based on everything I’ve written so far:

s1 e1: getting the team together, doing a con for Shojo, then at the end he dies and the gang is like “dang what now?" and intend to split up except then they Don’t.

mid-s1: Nale shows up and tries to trick the Order, but then gets beat like a drum.

late s1: Tsukiko is an underling of the Villain Of The Week, winds up in police custody. But She’ll Be Back.

s1 finale: Roy’s Vengeance: The Vengeaning. also we meet Redcloak as an antagonist.

s2 e1: the truth abt Haley’s father comes out

early s2: The Two Live Crews Job but it’s the Order vs the Linear Guild and the Linear Guild ARE all bad guys.

mid-s2: Redcloak returns. ugh.

late s2: the sapphire guard FBI makes its first appearance, hello O-Chul and Lien.

s2 pre-finale: once again they’re in conflict w Nale over smth, he spends the whole episodes making Cryptic Remarks, they basically beat him (like a drum!) but then the stinger at the end is that Tarquin reveals himself and Elan is like “Dad?!”, roll credits.

s2 finale, part 1: Elan is hanging out w Tarquin bc he’s DEEP in Denial, the Rest of the team tries to take Tarquin down, but it doesn’t work.

s2 finale, part 2: Elan finally gets a clue and they manage to beat Tarquin. still haven’t decided if Nale dies or not, but I’m leaning towards yes. also they rescue Haley’s dad.

s3 e1: fuck dude idk.

early s3: Redcloak shows up, AGAIN, everyone groans. he has blackmail on them, he wants them to take Xykon down.

mid s3: The Rashomon Job but it’s about stealing the Talisman of Dorukan and it turns out that Nale was there too (“oh!” Elan says. “I was wondering why I looked so weird in all those mirrors! But it wasn’t my reflection, it was Nale’s!” “Sweetie, that wasn’t Nale’s reflection,” says Haley. “Huh,” says Elan, “so the mirrors were broken?”, cue eye rolling from everyone else.), and the Successful thief was Hilgya, who’d nabbed it from the owner before it even went on display.

s3 finale: they beat Xykon, actually factually, because he deserves to get his ass Thoroughly kicked, even if only in AU form. Lien and O-Chul are there, so are some other less helpful FBI people. There’s a bit where O-Chul Exact Wordses his way out of telling his superiors about the Order’s less legal activities without technically lying. King shit.

s4 e1: doesn’t really matter. maybe smth to do w some legacy of Tarquin’s company to set up the drama w Malack & Durkon later.

early s4: Durkon gets SENT TO PRISON. Malack approaches the Order abt this because sure they have Different Ethics but they’re still Friends. (Roy is surprised and a little hurt that he’s never heard of Malack, but he ignores that in favor of Let’s Get Whatever Fuckers Did This To Our Friend.)

immediately after that: Miko and Tsukiko return as a Team, preventing the Order from working on the Durkon situation

mid s4: Redcloak makes another unexpected & unwelcome appearance but he’s maybe a little less of a dick? the Order collaborates with Malack & his Crime Buddies (hello, Vector Legion) to pull one over on him tho, because “less of a dick” does not mean “a pleasant or decent person”, and also he was mean abt Durkon being in jail, so he totally deserved it. he still gets whatever he wanted tho, just takes a blow to his pride. also prevents the Order from helping Durkon. they’re having a LOT of setbacks wonder why that could be, not to make sure the season fills its whole length or anything, no sirree

s4 finale: something something taking down the organization, headed by Hel (yes that’s her real name), which framed Durkon for their Big Crime. Durkon goes free and Extra Firmly retires, For Good, He Swears, but says he “met someone new” who might be an asset.

s5 e1: minrah joins the team! and the episode is set in like, somewhere really snowy. that’s all i got.

the rest of s5: don’t know, don’t care, it’s open-ended until the comic finishes up.

#mine #ask #corvidcorgi #order of the stick #oots #leverage #leverage au #oots au #au #outline #haha this thing clocks in at 1.9k words because i am LITERALLY incapable of shutting up #hope u enjoy it bc i spent Way Too Much Mental Effort mapping out how the OotS plotlines might play out in a leverage setting #and then promptly ignored Most of that in favor of making it funnier & dumber & more villain-of-the-week #(bc lbr the comic is Good but it's got an overarching plot form that the Leverage story style does Not jive with)#i'm not tagging all these characters lol

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sikhyes · 6 years

Text

red ledger ━ taehyung

a/n: this is the first part of a (mini) series !! i’ve been working on this for a pretty long time, partly because i take forever to write -.- but i hope you like it !! genre: kingsman!au, action, eventual romance pairing: taehyung x reader word count: 4.145 warning: some crude language, action

“We need to ask her.”

“She’s in seclusion. No one knows where she is, let alone ask her for help.”

Taehyung suppressed the cry of pain from his thigh when he forced himself in a standing position to approach Seokjin and Yoongi’s hushed conversation. “Wait, hold on --- who is she?”

The two elders turned to face their newest recruit with a grim smile, as though they were afraid of their answer.

APPROX. 2 YEARS AGO [ FILE HAS BEEN PARTIALLY REDACTED ]

“You’re about to embark on the most dangerous job interview in the world. Good luck.”

The man with the glasses (he introduced himself as Merlin) gave a final nod and tucked his silver clipboard beneath his arm before he exited the dorm. Half the candidates (which were subsequently all male) immediately relaxed from their formal position and mingled together, laughing like old friends in matching tweed jackets. Their faces said ‘mid twenties’ but their attire said ‘aging fifties on tenure’.

But while the majority of them acted as though the severity of the situation wasn’t daunting, Taehyung turned his attention to the body bag (an empty one) sitting on his bed. His name was written in black, unforgiving letters as though his death was an imminent event.

“Need a pen?” A soft voice asked, a stark contrast to the deeper voices that echoed around the room. Taehyung turned around and was soon face to face with a small female, dressed similarly like the others. But the haughty expression was lacking and instead a kind smile highlighted her soft features.

“Thanks,” Taehyung said and gave a quick smile before taking the pen to scrawl down his next of kin on the body bag. He handed it back before deciding that maybe making a friend wouldn’t be too horrible. Even if they were fighting for that one spot. “I’m Taehyung.”

“Seulgi. Nice to meet you, Taehyung.”

“Tae, is it?” One of the males approached the both of them. With the way the others flanked around him, anyone could assume that he was the leader. “I’m Jihun. Where’d they pick you off the streets?”

Their words were funny. It was as though they could actually bring him harm when he’d heard far worse from his step-dad at a much younger age. By now, nothing can break Taehyung. It was the only thing he had that helped him believe he could make it through this damn job interview.

Seokjin had been the one to deliver the news that his actual dad had been killed in a training accident, being the far younger partner who truly couldn’t do much due to the restraints of still being a rookie. His step-dad came into the picture soon thereafter, wooing his mother with empty promises and a strong fist. A fist that Taehyung would soon have to protect his mom and sister from.

After the unsolved death of his step-dad, he soon delved into a world of small and petty crime. It was after a pick-pocketing scheme gone wrong was he finally given an ultimatum: give up his partners and walk free or spend the next two years in jail.

But he was saved by the bell. Or in this case, a phone call.

Somehow, a mysterious stranger called in and paid the hefty bail, letting Taehyung walk out of the precinct with an immeasurable amount of questions. Fortunately, his answer came to him in the form of Kim Seokjin. After a couple days of weighing his options, he finally agreed to take the job interview in hopes that he could find out more about how his father actually died.

Turns out, he might have to actually experience it.

The training itself was brutal. Hand to hand combat, training with any gun known to man, dismantling a bomb as well as creating some, and the continuous laps around the whole settlement every morning. With copious amounts of reading and studying that tested on subjects from math and sciences to liberal arts, Taehyung managed to pass them all with flying colors. The poor kid raised on the wrong side of the tracks became to fill the Golden Boy position with Seulgi close behind.

If it wasn’t for her fear of heights.

[ REST OF FILE REDACTED : KIM TAEHYUNG’S PERSONAL REPORT ]

PRESENT TIME

The blast had thrown Taehyung back a few meters, landing unceremoniously upon the grassy hilltop. Shards and rubble from the explosion embedded themselves into his left thigh, provoking a grunt to escape his chapped lips. When he tried to sit himself up, individual strikes of pain from a clustered area on his thigh shot up and he immediately ceased his attempts. He could already feel bruises blooming upon his tailbone but the physical pain was incomparable to watching his newest home fall apart right in front of him.

He might’ve screamed but he wasn’t sure; his ears still rang from the explosion. Taehyung fought to crawl forward but two sets of hands grasped his battered frame to stop him. He felt himself fight against their restraints and despite the ringing, he could vaguely hear Yoongi’s raspy voice break through.

“Taehyung! Get up!”

It was like his body was on auto-pilot, obeying his voice without question like he was training again. But the sharp, individual pains returned and his body folded at the waist, barely supported by Yoongi and Seokjin’s arms. Once he was able to somewhat stand, his weight leaning completely on his right leg and the two males by his side, he faced the destruction again.

The large, classic mansion was nothing but half of its’ former glory, the rest has been taken in by the large fire still raging on despite the heavy rain. Yoongi was the one who was just riding up the road, involuntarily stopped at a hill where the blast of the bomb forced his car to inch back a little. He was miles away but the high point of the hill gave him a sickeningly perfect view to see the mansion crumble right in front of him. It wasn’t until he approached the scene did he see Taehyung looking close to hysteria, crawling closer to the old mansion.

Seokjin arrived next. Seulgi was nowhere to be found.

“Seulgi ━ ”

“We don’t know where she is. But her glasses…” The techie pulled out his phone and after a few taps, he pulled out a map that showed their exact location. Three dots were gathered together but the fourth wasn’t seen anywhere. “I can’t locate her but she’s online.” A few more taps and a list of the Kingsman members appeared on the screen.

Merlin. Galahad. Percival, himself. Lancelot (Seulgi).

“Well, we know she’s alive. That’s all that matters.” The elder members fell silent but the firmness in Taehyung’s voice nearly cracked and they didn’t have it in them to bring up the other possibility.

“Come on. The internal files are on automatic deletion if there’s any unauthorized explosives. There’s nothing else for us here.” Yoongi corralled the other two in the other car and hit the road.

No one knew where their techie was taking them. Familiar streets faded away to make way for rural areas to unfold by their windows. The neat tar streets melted away to gravelly roads and the sun above them lowered for the moon to take its place. Seokjin had fallen asleep in the front seat while Taehyung occupied the entirety of the backseat. When Yoongi stole a glimpse in the rearview mirror, he was partially taken aback at how young Tae looked. The stress of their job and the newest weight of their home taken from them was nowhere to be seen upon his soft, tan features.

Yoongi almost had a slight urge to just ignore the route and take them both away to safety. He was the first to be recruited out of the three of them, despite Seokjin being a year older, and he had an unexplainable instinct to save them out of their newest hell-hole. He already felt partially responsible for losing Seulgi.

“We need to ask her.” Taehyung had woken in time to hear the middle of his seniors’ hushed conversation. Seokjin sat at the passenger seat still, looking as restless as ever. His entire upper body was facing Yoongi but the latter didn’t even spare him a glance.

“She’s in seclusion. No one knows where she is, let alone ask her for help.” With the annoyance that laced the techie’s reply, Taehyung could deduce that their current topic was worn out to its limits.

Taehyung suppressed the cry of pain from his thigh when he forced himself in a sitting position to approach Seokjin and Yoongi’s hushed conversation. “Wait, hold on -- who is she?”

The two elders turned to face their newest recruit with a grim smile, as though they were afraid of their answer. “Go back to sleep. We’ll fix your leg before we get into the planning.”

Although the temptation to veer off course increased, the distance between them and their destination decreased. In only a few short minutes, the car slowed down to a crawl and inevitably stopped right in the small parking lot of the dilapidated motel. Despite its unseemly appearance, they were apparent still running with the flickering ‘VACANCY’ sign.

“Wake up.” It took only a couple taps on Seokjin’s shoulder to wake up the eldest but Yoongi had to shake Taehyung a few times to rouse him from his deep sleep. He had fallen asleep nearly instantly from the moment he sat down in the car; it was like he was desperate to leave reality for a little while. Once everyone was out of the car, Yoongi withdrew a large canvas duffle bag, painted black with a gold stripe running down the middle of the straps.

“Omelas.” Taehyung read the large, fluorescent sign above the motel. The blue glow washed over their tired expressions and Seokjin only offered a little grunt in reply before entering the sketchy establishment. There was only one guy manning the concierge desk (if you could even call it that) and all Yoongi did was hand over a bundle of cash before three keys to their largest room were deposited into their waiting hands without question.

Taehyung wasn’t sure if he was experiencing shock. He may have felt it when Seokjin first delivered the news of his dad’s death but he was stupid and childish. The sudden lack of a father figure didn’t seem to quite hit him as hard as it did when he watched his home burn down to the ground. But as tempting as it was to just hide away in an obscure forest in a cave and live the rest of his days as a hermit, his training was practically ingrained in him, keeping him from becoming an empty shell. For the first couple of days, he kept to simple workouts (despite his healing thigh) that could be done indoors. However, cabin fever hit and he nearly had to beg Yoongi to let him run a few laps down the streets every morning.

While working out kept his mind off their newest loss, Yoongi hid behind the massive glow of three large computers he set up. (“Finding our solution,” was all their techie said when Taehyung finally asked.) Seokjin, on the other hand, busied himself with rearranging all the weapons that were left in the car. Cleaning, taking apart, putting back together. After a week and a half, the clicking and sliding of metal pieces became the strange, crooked melody that they’ve slowly grown accustomed to.

When two weeks had passed, the three had realized the weather had begun to mimic their countenance. Gloomy, dark, and not a ray of light to shine through those thick, gray clouds. After Yoongi had lashed out upon one monitor that didn’t provide the answer he was looking for, the other two Kingsmen decided to steer clear until he found their ‘last saving grace’. Apparently Merlin got a tad dramatic when he was at his wit’s end.

Call it poetic justice but Taehyung knew there had to be some supernatural force looking out for them because right when the rain ceased and the clouds faded off, Yoongi immediately stood from his seat, the chair knocking behind him, and pointed at his screen.

“I found her.”

Seokjin immediately rushed over and Taehyung was quick to follow. In the middle monitor was a grainy, street image of a figure that looked distinctly female. Her frame was swaddled in a large, oversized sweater but yoga pants hugged her legs. The hood was pulled up and over her head but at the angle the camera took the photo, Taehyung was able to barely distinguish her facial features.

“Jesus… she looks the exact same,” Yoongi chuckled. Seokjin joined in but there was an uneasy tinge lacing his lilting laughter.

Her apartment (Taehyung still didn’t know her name) was tucked right in the center of a street of red bricked buildings. Each of them were exactly alike. Stone steps led up to a black door with a golden engraving the apartment number and two windows on either side of the door. Right beneath was a pocket of flowers. It looked like it came out of a perfect town of suburbia. Yoongi and Seokjin seemed to have braced themselves as they climbed up the steps, Taehyung behind them. When they knocked, he expected a sweet citizen to answer, maybe a couple kids at their feet. It was what he thought would fit in such a happy neighborhood.

What he didn’t expect was a gorgeous woman who reeked of alcohol.

“What do you want?”

Seokjin took in her entire appearance. Day old pajamas hugged her otherwise toned frame, a half-empty bottle of Hennessy loosely held by her left hand, and a remote control in the other. Something told Taehyung that the remote wasn’t for the TV but maybe something far more catastrophic.

“We need your help,” Yoongi answered. She pocketed the remote and gripped the doorknob on her end as though she was contemplating on whether or not to humor the three men in front of her. Even though the distinct smell of alcohol that lingered gave the idea that she was some kind of bum, her eyes were sharp and the way she seemed to take apart Taehyung with just a piercing gaze had him shifting uncomfortably in his place.

“Who’s that?” She pointed with the bottle of Hennessy before taking a swig.

“A new recruit. Our only recruit.” Seokjin spoke up this time and he held out two hands in slight surrender. Taehyung could already see that he was revving up his ‘charming’ side but to his surprise, the woman snorted.

“You know that doesn’t work on me.” And there was a mean, teasing lilt to her voice as she finished off the bottle in one last go. She placed it aside before pulling the door wider. Seokjin took the lead and crossed the threshold with Yoongi following. Taehyung was a couple paces behind before she shut the door.

Her apartment itself was relatively clean if he were to base his initial expectations on her appearance. Empty green bottles occupied most of the coffee table that sat in between the couch and the TV. A blanket was pushed aside at the edge of the armrest and if Taehyung was right, a glint of a half-sheathed knife sat in between the cushions.

“Alright, fellas.” The woman sauntered back into the center of her living room with a fresh new bottle of hennessy. “Here’s how it’s going to work. Explain why you need my help. You have until I finish this bottle.” She uncorked it and tipped back the heavy bottle.

“We’re still not sure how but Headquarters was…” Seokjin’s sentence died on his lips as the amber liquid disappeared fast from the bottle and down her throat. Taehyung’s eyes widened as Yoongi let out a disappointed sigh. “Holy shit.”

“Time’s up, handsome.” She gave out a little burp before wiping the back of her mouth and placing the new empty bottle along with the rest on the table. “Now get out.”

The ferocity that had laid dormant beneath her words was easy to hear and Taehyung had even taken a half-step back in surprise. However, Yoongi did the opposite and stepped forward. “We wouldn’t go to you if we didn’t have another choice. You know that.”

If someone asked Taehyung, he would’ve assumed that his senior’s own argument was comparatively weak to her stubborn stride that she displayed earlier. But to the new recruit’s surprise, he watched the strong resolve behind those eyes to crumble ever so slightly as she gave the tiniest of nods. “You guys must’ve really fucked up to have to come to me. What do you need?”

“Resources. Someone blew up Headquarters and targeted every single agent. There’s no one left of the Kingsman but us.” If the woman was shocked at Seokjin’s answer, she didn’t show it. “Can you get us in contact with the Statesmen?”

She grimaced but nodded nonetheless. “Of course I can. Follow me.”

“Who’re the Statesmen? And who are you?” It was as though the dam inside Taehyung had finally crashed down, releasing the numerous questions that he’d been acquiring from the moment Kingsman was no more.

“I’m Y/N. The Statesmen are the American counterparts,” she answered roughly but polite all the same. She could be patient when she wanted to be. Y/N led them down the hall and entered the small walk-in closet of her bedroom, beckoning them inside and ordered Yoongi to shut the door. Her hands shoved aside the hangers that held her clothing to reveal a password safe embedded into the wall. After punching in a long string of numbers, the safe creaked open and in it was a lever that stuck from the bottom of the casing. She pulled it down and the floor beneath them began to lower.

It was like deja vu. As the drywall rose up around them, it slowly melted away to be replaced with a faded brick foundation, similar to the ones in the tailor shop that led to the mansion. Once they stopped moving, she spun the wheel of an arched door and that too creaked open. “This door hasn’t been used since they first built the damn thing,” she grumbled as she stepped through.

The corridor that greeted them was narrow, forcing the agents to walk in a single file line. After a minute or two of walking, a much more modern looking set of silver double doors appeared before them.

“It’s the shuttle to the base level of Statesmen headquarters. Good luck.”

“Wait, you’re not coming with us?” Taehyung found himself asking. He thought his question was stupid but he earned nods of agreement to his question from his superiors.

Y/N shook her head. “Told you boys. I quit.”

“We can’t enter their headquarters without a mediator. We’ll be shot down before we could even step foot inside.” Yoongi crossed his arms as he spoke, quietly defying the woman’s impenetrable wall of stubbornness.

“Shoot first, ask questions later, huh? That’s a nasty little stereotype,” she sighed. “Fine. Only to keep you dipshits from dying.” She pushed through the doors and entered the slim shuttle. Once they arrived and they stepped out of the fast transportation device, all four of them were each staring down a barrel of an antique firearm.

“We got intruders.” And with a swift swing of their rifle, the butt of their firearm landed against their temples and their vision went black.

Their muscles were shocked awake, synapses firing and Taehyung jolted in his constrained seat. It took a moment for him to realize a bucket of cold water had been dumped on him. “What the fuck…”

“Oi, you sentient, walking ballsack! It’s me!” Y/N’s furious voice echoed around the chamber they were all currently being held at and the man that was holding the incriminating bucket nearly passed out at the sight of the angry woman.

“Oh shit. My bad, Hennessy.” The man quickly dropped the bucket and hurried to free her. “I didn’t think you’d be with one of them.”

“First of all, what did I say about calling me Henny? I don’t go by that, I go by 22.” Taehyung watched the now light interaction with pure confusion. The moment he had met Y/N, she was all anger and alcohol and blunt statements. Watching her affectionately ruffle the other male’s hair (now that he was wide awake, Taehyung could see he was pretty young)... it was unsettling, to say the least. “Jungkook, do me a favor and let them go. They got nothing on them.”

Jungkook frowned, his large doe eyes turning back to the other three men. Seokjin was completely awake now and Yoongi was calculating every possibility of escape.

“Trust me, kid. They’re here to ask us for help.” At Y/N’s second urging, the male obeyed and once they were all free, they stretched out their sore limbs; they weren’t exactly sure of how long they were unconscious. “The Kingsman had been eradicated. Can you take us to see Champ?”

The trip to their chief’s office was long enough for Jungkook to explain the whole ‘Statesmen’ protocol to Taehyung. While Kingsman were given code names taken from King Arthur and his knights, Statesmen used names of different alcoholic beverages. Y/N was initially called Hennessy; she’s called 22 now. Jungkook was Soju. And their chief? His name was Champagne, Champ for short.

“But Y/N… how did you know the Statesmen if you’re a Kingsman?”

A heated glare was sent in reply and before the topic could be pressed, a set of mahogany double doors appeared before them. Seokjin and Yoongi stepped through but Taehyung was held back by Jungkook.

“Let the grownups talk. We should take you to see Doc, you’ve got a funny little limp.” Taehyung had a protest ready to fire upon his tongue but the sudden disappearance of Y/N made him hesitate. Jungkook saw the opening and took it, dragging the boy over to their infirmary.

Doc happened to be an aging senior with the most steadiest hands he’s ever seen. His title was his code name and with his comically blown up gray hair, Taehyung dubbed him as Einstein 2.0 in his head. As he got to work on changing out the sloppy stitches on his thigh, Jungkook decided to fill in Taehyung with the brief history of Y/N.

“If I’m honest, she came to us instead of the other way around. The amnesiac agent.”

“Amnesiac?”

“That’s right,” Jungkook nodded gravely. “She was found in the last booth of one of our bars, which is like our cover. Same as your tailor shops. Anyways, she was practically broken everywhere. Bruises all over her arms. A nasty bruise on her left eye, a cut lip. She was barely breathing. I was one of the other two who found her and when she came to, she didn't have any memories.”

“Was she lying?”

“No. She underwent all of our lie detectors and passed every single time. We were going to fix her up then let her go but she got into a fight with one of our stupid agents. Somehow, she managed to rile him up enough to bait him into a fight. In the end… she won. That's when we found out she had some type of training before she came to us. We interrogated her for weeks but she really didn't know anything. In the end, we re-trained her and offered her a position.”

Right when Jungkook finished narrating, Doc tapped Taehyung’s knee to signal he finished. “I got a message from Champ to go meet him and our new guests in his office.

The office looked like a replica of the Oval Office in the White House but instead of the ivory paint, mahogany was a running theme with the interior design. A wall of aged whiskey bottles lined the shelves and right in front of the two large windows sat a fancy desk with a man sitting behind it. He was twirling his mustache like an action star would and Taehyung found it hard to take their leader seriously.

But with how Y/N suddenly stopped slouching and the twisted scowl on her face disappearing at the sight of her boss, the other Kingsmen straightened up as well.

“We got to talking and we decided to help you find the one responsible. Once we get the perpetrator, the Statesmen will help rebuild financially.” The tension between Champ and Seokjin was palpable but they knew that they had no choice. “I see Taehyung’s walking just fine now. We’ll debrief you tomorrow. For now, get some rest. Y/N will show you to your rooms.”

#thekpopnetwork #bts au #bts scenario #bts kingsman #bts x reader #kingsman taehyung #taehyung x reader #v scenario #bts fanfic #v fanfic #taehyung fanfic #niniwrites.#mine.gif

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zyx · 6 years

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fav mutuals and why? let's spread some love 💓

i had this in my inbox for so f long, im sorry :/ also i wanted to say that its a cliche but i love all my mutuals lmao i mostly added ppl who ive known for a longer period of time ?… anyway sorry again for replying like 2 months later oops!

@jjngwoo ; i think lucy is the person ive known on here for the longest time, i can’t even remember how long its been… like 8 years skjdkjf and i love her a fucking lot. we sometimes spend a lot of time w/o talking but when we talk again its like time never passed. i hope that at this point she knows how much i love her and how much i care about her. she’s super sweet, and nice and funny and i love having her in my life :(

@thatsummerain ; anna is like… the only person who know me best? like she knows a lot of things that i’ve never said to anyone else and we dont talk a lot lately which its so f*kin sad but she has always been there for me, has listened to me when i needed and she..just has been an amazing friend to me. i wish i could be a better friend for her, but i guess sometimes i just focus too much in my own problems and im a mess so i feel like im not a good friend. but i love her so much and i hope she hasnt forgetten and uh yeah :(

@louiswmalik ; please ash is like… my long time crush lmfao i dont remember who followed who first but she has always been like a zouie queen so i kinda admired her from afar and i was happy she was following me and that she actually liked me ajksjkf cos she’s so cool and idk, im glad she re-followed me when she knew my new identity lmaoooo and just. im happy we’re still in contact and that im able to see her pretty face every now and then !

@nellyhoran ; rita can suck my ass for all i care?????? but akjsjkf honestly i hate her sometimes but she’s like. i love being friends with her even tho we dont agree in a lot of stuff. we’re mostly always saying dumb stuff when we talk lol but when we have like deep conversations its like….. interesting LOL. we have a lot of memories and yes, im gonna mention that one time we were drunk off of our asses and did a lot of stupid AND embarrassing things…….god. she’s super funny and always make me laugh and always make me want to block her but we left that behind just like we did with [redacted]. mi ratmommy …luv u

@blazinginbus1 ; honestly i dont know anyone thats as nice and sweet as emily. ive told her this a lot of times but idk what i did to deserve someone like her in my life. she’s always encouraging me, and telling me nice things when im feeling down and whether or not i believe her its nice to know someone cares and that i have someone out there i can always talk to. we havent talked much but the times we actually did been nice. em is funny, caring, and such a positive person that everyone deserves to have in their lives. im glad i met her and i love her a lot!!!!!!

@birdmen ; kjskjsf pls we have like the most iconic relationship. i think we never talked when we were both into 1d, it was until we both were free from them that we started talking abt how we dont like henry ajksjkf also e sent me one video that changed my life forever and thats basically what tied us akjsjkf i liked how it never was awks to talk to her, and how until now we can message each other about literally anything and itll be like we’ve been talking every day. they’re really easy going and thats what i like the most about them!!!!! im glad we’re still friends and uhhh ilu e :(

@magnusgoatee ; jo!!!!! she has always been so nice with me since day 1! we’ve talked a few times when we were both zouies lol and its so nice to be still mutuals with her cuz i love her so much and i love seeing her on my dash!!!! also i love having jo as a friend on fb ajksjf i wish we can be mutuals till one of us deletes lmao

@myloxylcto ; i??????? love rehab like we havent talked in so long and i dont even know if she still likes me even a bit lmfao but she has been one of my faves ever and :((((( i love telling her how pretty she is cuz its true… also as far as i remember shes still my gf so… :) i got di most preddie girl ! shes so funny and shes just…. iconic, a queen, id die for her

@dokyungsu ; UHHHHHHH what can i say abt ren…… she’s like super nice akjskjf and idk i love how we just kind of started interacting and then she just became my babygurl~ and she’s always so nice with me????? like telling me cute things and i love her a lot, i wanna get to know her more tho. college can choke cuz its taking her away from me……..

i love everyone who ive ever interacted even if it was just once….. but…..yeah akhskjsf

#i hate these type of asks cuz #everytime i just want to @ all my mutuals lmfao #im sorry if i didnt tagged u i love u im just dumb :(#anonymous #answered #im me not tagging kpop mutuals skjsdjkf #only ren.. and well lucy ajjdf

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