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sttoru · 10 months

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“AS IF THE MEMORIES HAVE A HEART THAT ONLY BEATS AT NIGHT.”

༄ sypnosis. your boyfriend is on a business trip, yet always finds the time to call you at night. though, this time he’s lonely and in need of comfort.

༄ note. inspired by one of mahmoud darwish’s poems plus by my love for this man. sigh he’s so pretty. excuse me if this is too sappy.

༄ tags. satoru x reader. female reader. pet names such as ‘sweet, love, baby, babe, angel”. satoru is clingy. this is just uhh, fluff and sprinkles of angst + reverse comfort. spoilers jjk manga (stuff w/ suguru & toji).

“what are you doing,” “where are you,” and “who’s with you,”

satoru, as always, didn’t give you the chance to greet him properly once you picked up his call. your boyfriend was sent on a mission overseas and has been calling you every night since.

he says it’s to ‘hear your pretty voice’ and because he apparently ‘can’t survive without hearing it at least once a day’.

“satoru— love, calm down.” you chuckle softly, putting the call on speaker before going back to eat your dinner.

you hear the sorcerer let out a small whine over the phone, “my bad, sweet. you know i always look forward to speaking with you.”

you hum lightly in response. satoru has always had the habit to call you whenever he misses you even in the slightest of amounts.

some may find that annoying, however you’re aware that you are the only person satoru can rely on at the end of the day. that’s exactly why you try your best to answer all of his phone calls.

“how’d the mission go?” you ask after swallowing a bite of your food.

“pfft, the usual. dealt with some annoying curses that’ve been plaguing the area.” your boyfriend groans; he wished he didn’t have to take care of his duties so he could be with you all the time.

satoru just wanted to hold you in his arms, cuddle you, shower you with love, take you out on cute dates and spoil you with all kinds of gifts. his responsibilities as a teacher and as the strongest sorcerer constantly got in the way of that simple dream.

“good work, baby. you did well today.” you reply, earning a small ‘i-know-i-did’ huff from your boyfriend.

“thanks,” satoru adds, his voice muffled. it sounded like he had some food in his mouth, which you easily guessed was something sweet, “you know.. i was thinking about us— eh, you in particular.”

a silence falls over the phone afterwards. it was like satoru gave you a moment to process his words before he continues.

“well, when do you not think about me?” you snicker.

you couldn’t see it, but satoru rolled his eyes at your comment before letting a chuckle escape his lips, “hey! was trying to create a sentimental mood there.”

“but, i guess— yeah. true.” your words were the truth; satoru was a hopeless man when it came to you. you’ve invaded his thoughts, his heart and even his soul.

“anyways,” your boyfriend continues, pausing slightly to swallow the snack in his mouth, “i know i say this every day, but i wish you were here with me.”

you stop chewing on your food as soon as you hear the slight change of tone in satoru’s voice. you immediately knew that he needed you at the moment.

“mhm, i know,” you reply quietly. you wanted to let him get it all out before comforting him properly with your words.

satoru took that short answer as a sign to keep talking and opening up about his feelings to you.

“it’s just,” he sighs defeatedly, “actually, i don’t know. i guess being alone during times like these really gets to me.”

satoru stared at the ceiling as he laid on his back. his phone was on the pillow right next to his head, also on speaker.

when he’s with you, it’s easy to forget about all kinds of gloomy thoughts that may enter his mind. all satoru has to do is focus his attention on you and he won’t have any time to dwell on such stuff.

however when he’s alone, he’s left with his own brain and the thoughts that ate away at him ever since the inevitable incident with toji a few years ago.

suguru. amanai.

rustling sounds; satoru’s moving positions on his bed to somehow focus on your voice again.

“i guess it’s also because it’s unknown what the future holds.” satoru pauses. this time the pause was for him to collect his thoughts.

you knew what he meant by that; satoru had went through a few traumatic events over the years. he’s faced betrayal, loss and death ever since he was a teenager.

even if he doesn’t say nor show it, satoru is scared of what the future holds for him. especially with you in the picture now— he doesn’t want you to change or disappear on him. the thought alone makes his heart ache.

“..hey, can you promise me one thing, angel?” satoru eventually speaks up again, his voice a hushed whisper over the phone.

“of course. what is it?” you answer softly.

a third and short silence falls between you again.

“promise me that you’ll stay safe.” satoru sounds like he’s desperately trying to keep his tone neutral, however you could sense some vulnerability in there.

now that you’re thinking about it, you’ve never seen or heard satoru cry out in sadness or distress. though you know for sure that those feelings are building up somewhere inside of him. it’s only a matter of time before they need to be released.

“i promise,” you start in a comforting tone, “i promise i’ll stay safe, satoru.”

you could hear your boyfriend sigh in relief. just a small promise like that was enough to calm him down a little. for now, that is.

“i’ve failed many people before,” satoru continues, still trying to keep the tone of his voice neutral, “however, i will not fail you.”

you nod to yourself. the rest of your dinner was getting cold as you used your chopsticks to absentmindedly poke the rice while listening to satoru over the phone.

“you’re too important for me to lose,” he murmurs, taking a deep breath to steady his voice, “if it ever comes to that.. i don’t know what i’ll do.”

satoru actually doesn’t know how he’ll react or what he’ll do if you—the only person worth fighting for—would leave him; will all the thoughts come crashing down on him and cause him to finally break down?

he doesn’t know. nor does he want to find out. ever.

“don’t you worry, love.” you answer, “i hereby promise you that i won’t leave your side any time soon.”

you sigh, a small smile on your face which satoru couldn’t witness. you figured to cheer him up with your own words— it felt like he needed a mix of distraction and comfort at the moment and that’s what you wanted to give him.

“i’m not going anywhere. you’re completely and utterly stuck with me for now.” you playfully warn him, putting emphasis on the two words, “there’s no backing out of this, ‘toru.”

the sorcerer couldn’t help but laugh slightly at your last remark; you always knew how to make him feel better in an instant. that’s why he loved you to death,

“make that forever and we have a deal.”

“fiiine,” you reply in an over exaggerated tone before giggling, “forever it is. don’t get bored of me any time soon then.”

“oh, don’t you worry, angel.” satoru chuckles, sighing the stress away in one deep breath, “i’ll never get bored of my favourite girl. never in a million years.”

he sits up on his bed before standing up and walking to the window of his hotel room. satoru looked outside while grabbing another snack from a nearby table.

the sky was beautiful; it reminded him of you, though your beauty was no match for the sky. you were prettier than nature itself.

“satoru.” you call out to him over the phone and he immediately snaps back to reality.

“yeah, baby?” he replies, unwrapping his chocolate bar with one hand in the meantime.

“be reaaaal honest with me. like really honest.” a grin forms on your face as you thought of what to say next.

“you know i always speak the truth with you,” satoru mutters with a smile while putting a piece of chocolate in his mouth, “go on.”

“how many of those chocolate bars have you eaten today?”

the question caught satoru off guard and he instantly stops chewing.

satoru turns his head to the left and then to the right, eyes narrowed and body in a defensive stand like somebody was going to attack him any time soon.

“wh— the hell? how did you know? don’t tell me you’ve been secretly watchin’ me the entire time.”

you could already picture the way he’s probably checking his entire hotel room at the moment. your poor boyfriend may be strongest, but not when it comes to such silly ‘scary’ stuff. it’s adorable.

“babe, you never go a day without eating that one specific chocolate bar.” you giggle softly, taking another bite of your own food, “i’ve come to know your eating habits by now.”

“that so?” satoru grins to himself as he puts another piece in his mouth, “what am i thinking at the moment then? if you know me so well.”

you roll your eyes and get up to put your dishes away, taking your phone with you to the sink. “hmm.. well let me think.”

“take all the time you need, baby.”

satoru constantly tells you that you’re always on his mind, so you figured that this time wouldn’t be any different.

you know it’d probably be something sappy that’ll make you both giggle uncontrollably.

“maybe, something like—“ you start in a teasing tone, “i don’t know, uhh— ‘i love you?’”

there it goes; the uncontrollable giggles and laughter that fill both of your ears. it felt like you were two young teenagers in love again.

“damn, i’m really that predictable, huh?” satoru eventually says, trying to catch his breath as his tummy started to hurt from laughing so much.

“nah. i’d say it’s the power of love.”

another fit of laughter follows.

so, the night went on and on; going from discussions about random stupid stuff to deep philosophical conversations and back to the cheesy, lovey dovey remarks.

and of course, the call wouldn’t end without a direct and sleepy ‘i love you’ from your dear boyfriend.

#sttoru writes.#jjk x reader #gojo x reader #gojo x you #jjk x you #gojo fic #satoru x reader #satoru x you #jjk fic

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james-is-here · 1 month

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oh? OH? 👀 🫢

Part two

Blogs: @heartbinn

Tags: Angst, my first hurt/no comfort cause I have a soft heart and could never go through with it, Chan is the one not getting comfort, Members forget Mn, Made the manager...attached to Mn? He's just as sad to see you go.

Lmk if any other tags are needed. Feedback and comments are welcome, it makes me so happy seeing how you thought of my writings.

You realized something was off when you were 'forgotten' for the second live stream in a row. You don't know when it happened. How it started. You just started noticing more and more that you were being left out.

"Sorry, Mn, I thought you were busy. Didn't think to invite you." They always thought you were busy.

"Hectic schedule, I'm sorry." You guys have the same schedule, that's not an excuse.

"I'm sorry, Jagi, I thought that was tomorrow." Even Chan forgot things.

You never use to be like this. You were all once connected, always talking, always hanging out when there was time. They listened to your feedback, they agreed with your inputs, and when they needed, they'd go to you for comfort.

Now it's like you're a ghost. Present but not visible. You look like a deer caught in headlights when they talk about stuff that you haven't been caught up on. There was one time in the choreography that you were to catch one of the boys and you stood around aimlessly and ended up getting yelled at. You yelled right back because they never tell you anything and you didn't know you had to catch one of them. It wasn't fair!

"Mn, you could've hurt Jeongin! Why didn't you catch him?!" "How could I have caught him if I didn't know that was the next move! You guys don't tell me anything anymore!" "Yeah we do!" "Christopher, Don't lie! You are doing it too!" "Mn!" You didn't care that you disrespected him and used his full first name. You were annoyed.

Your breaking point was two things. The first was when you had to find out about an upcoming album through your manager. He had sent you a preview photo of the album cover and you flew into a panic attack. New Album? When? How? They decided on things without you? You're apart of the group too, how could they not have realized you weren't there?!

The second was when you were waiting...and waiting...and waiting in Chan's room. He had promised a movie night for your anniversary and yet four hours later than when he promised, he still wasn't there. You just left his room, red eyed and absolutely pissed. That night, he didn't even check on you when he came home.

It took a couple days but you had officially left Stray Kids. You couldn't take the neglect anymore, it was unfair, uncalled for. Your manager was sad to see you go but he understood, even he noticed the others neglect but it seemed that when he told them off it went through one ear and out the other.

You packed at night, taking about half an hour to debate if you wanted to take memories of being in the group but instead you just took down the photos of you and the boys and cut yourself out, leaving just the boys along with the few albums and photo cards you kept on your desk, throwing the pieces of you in the waste bin underneath.

Tears streamed down your face as you packed your suitcase. Midway, your realized you folded the two hoodies Chan gave you. You lay one on your bed but decide to keep the white one as you zip up your luggage and start packing your other one.

Leaving in the cover of night let you leave without seeing their faces, without seeing possible confusion or pity pleads to have you stay. In the days it took to be out of the group, you also managed to get accepted into another company. You would've stayed at JYPE if it didn't mean you'd still see the boys that once brought you joy, if you stayed you'd have to put up with them trying to talk you back into the group. You just can't seem to trust them anymore.

You ex-manager was nice enough to take you to your home where you're staying until you can properly integrate into your new company, possibly into a new group. You heard that the company knew you and would be helping you to try and join a group or even help you become a soloist.

That morning, the boys went on with their lives, completely oblivious. It wasn't until after practice and recording that they were finishing up and getting ready to leave the room they gathered in to discuss the album when Chan looked around and finally noticed. "Wait...Where's Mn?" Their manager looked at Chan and the others before sighing. "Really? Haven't I yelled at all of you to stop ignoring him? It took you almost all day to realize?" Your manager felt really bad for what they were doing to you so he did get a bit heated.

"What do you mean?" The manager sighs before guiding the boys out. "Let's get to the dorms." Is all he says. When they get there, the manager makes them sit on the couch, hands on his hips. "Have any of you really realized that you were excluding Mn? I asked him about the album cover and he told me that he didn't even know a comeback was planned to happen. He also told me that you yelled at him for almost dropping Jeongin but you guys never told him or showed him the choreo, how could he have caught him if he didn't even know what was going on?"

With a deep sigh, the manager looks down at the floor before delivering the news. "Mn signed out four days ago..." He looks back up to the boys, staring at him wide eyed. "What?" "He's gone, Chan. I took him home last night." "W-Well, we'll see him at the company at some point right? So he's not-" "He's moving to KQ. He thought that if he stayed at JYPE you guys would stop him at any opportunity to try and get him back. They're already looking to either put him in a group or help him be a soloist." Han was the first to move, running past the manager to run to your room.

The others hear him cry out a moment later then return with your cut photos in his hands. "He's gone..." A few others run to see it for themselves as Han drops the cut photos next to Chan and slides down the nearby wall to cry into his hands.

Chan picked up one of the photos. A picture of you and him, a selfie with him hugging you from behind with his chin on your shoulder. He remembered the negative space where you were, you had your head turned, looked at him with so much love and a bright smile that matched his.

"I'm sorry, Chan...but he was tired of being just a shadow. I wanted him to reconsider but I saw everything and I knew it would be worthless." He saw in the corner of his eyes some members trying to call you only to huff when they got your voicemail.

Years later, they still felt hallow. They were happy and working well but they still felt empty. They know you've blocked them but they still texted you or tried to call you even after this long.

Telling Stay was really hard, they just told them it was for mental health issues but some Stays also noticed the neglect and pieced it together, especially when some fans noticed you in another group.

They were backstage getting ready to preform at the award ceremony the main title from their new album, decked in pirate like outfits with layers and accessories but still dressed a minimum amount to be able to dance.

Chan was helping Felix with his headset when Felix caught something out of the corner of his eye. "Mn!" His eyes widen as a smile took over his dropped jaw and the others turn in the direction Felix is looking. You stop hearing your name, turning to see who it was only to stare at the group of boys unmoving. Felix's hand hesitated before waving at you with a gentle smile.

It's been so long that you were honestly thrown off by how much they've grown and how handsome they've become. You see Jeongin smile at you and you notice his braces are gone, Hyunjin has grown his hair out along with Felix. These little details are forgotten the moment you feel a hand on the side of your face and you turn back around. "Hey." You smile, Seonghwa completely taking your attention as you watch him smile in return, your hands resting on his waist. "Come on, Jagiya. We've been waiting for you." He says, leaning forward to give you a quick peck but you pull him back to you for a slightly longer kiss before you take his hand and he takes you back to the table.

You heard their gasp when you kissed Seonghwa but honestly, you didn't care. You were seen in Ateez, heard and included way more than you ended up becoming in Stray Kids.

Chan's heart was crushed, he honestly had hope that you guys could talk it out but also knew there was no way but he still hoped. His tears blurred his vision as he let a sob left him, he tried not to let them fall, he had to go on stage soon, but it hurt. He had lost not just a member but someone he actually truly loved. He didn't mean to forget him, he didn't mean to push him away. The regret of not realizing sooner still weighed heavily on his shoulders after this long.

The way you held Seonghwa was the same way you'd hold him. The smile and shine in your eye you gave the other idol was the same you'd give to him, the same one in the taped photo that still remains on his desk after he found the other half. The members also have the other photos, taped as well and put on the fridge.

What crushed Chan the most in that moment?

You didn't look back as Seonghwa took you away.

pssst, I would write more Ateez but I don't fully know their dynamics and personalities completely so I'll probably just insert them like I did in this fic 😁

#random #bleh #stray kids #straykids #stray kids x male reader #bang chan #bang chan x male reader #seonghwa x male reader #ateez #ateez x male reader #ateez seonghwa #stray kids bang chan #seonghwa

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onesidedradiostatic · 2 months

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helluva boss s1e1&2 reaction

alright gonna start this I guess, filter the #osrs.helluva tag if you don't want this on your dash

if you haven't heard before! I have never watched helluva boss, only seen a couple clips and screenshots on twitter. I have heard about some stuff regarding plot/characters though but otherwise, don't know too much

episode 1

so um first off, the thumbnail

holy fucking shit humans!??!??!

you know despite having heard all about it

the first half of the episode made me completely forget that this story had a main romance LMAO

and oh they weren't kidding this is a fucking mess, it's soooo clearly imbalanced in stolas' favour atm

"I will fuck you and your wife" I'M CRYING?????

yeah I can see how these can act as silly filler stuff we don't get to see in hazbin, didn't realise the episodes were this short, makes binging pretty manageable

episode 2

this song!! I've actually heard it before, a cover of it's come up in my youtube mix before

IS THAT THE GUY

also jesus christ can stolas only think with his dick CALM DOWN man

THEY HAVE THAT BIG OF A HEIGHT DIFFERENCE???

LUCIFER HAS A PARK CALLED LU-LU WORLD LMAO??????????????

oh wow fizzarolli's stuff really has a lot of cameos early on

holy shit I love how you can see beef between blitzo and fizzarolli this early on (no idk all the details, all I know is they have some history together)

also I actually didn't expect him to sound like that even if it's just a robo him

and as I was typing this I got this anon ask LMAO

okay thank you for clarifying

holy shit yeah whatever the fuck is going down with these two is what I'm looking forward to LMAO (LIIIKE I said before, what I've heard about fizzarolli interests me even if he only properly appears later on)

awww this is cute

and that's the first 2 episodes!! pretty silly so far but I see hints of interesting stuff that'll come in the future so that's cool, stolas..... well I'm sure you'll improve soon

may end up binging this so idk whether reactions will be as consistent (or if I'll keep grouping them up in 2 episodes) but if I have something to say I'll say it 🫡🫡

#osrs.helluva

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dazaii-osamuu · 21 days

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list of headcanons (that I totally and MOST DEFINITELY didn't forget to post abt... lol who would do that?)

Doesn't know when to take things "seriously serious" unless the atmosphere itself changes

^like, yk that feeling of tension when ur parents start arguing? yeah, that, basically

Dazai has a tendency to get gifts for his friends (unironically) at the most random time

^^ and thus whenever he's outside and sees a shop, he'll think abt that one person and debate whether or not should he bother

^^ (actually pretty considerate, if you think abt it)

Mainly awake at night (bad habits carried from pm)

speaking of pm, he's still in contact w like most of them but has strained relationships

^^and that most of his habits originated from him being the demon prodigy and all

Likes to interact w old and new ppl that he has heard of and prob lower their lifespan just by existing

Still sucks at cooking—

—but can cook simple things only

bc he can't cook much, he's usually starving to death

Druggie just to feel some other feeling whenever alone (not sure if that's canon already bc my memory is that of a goldfish) sooo—

—bad habit of consuming random substances

Can probably recognize 20% of pills alone

His bandages are usually old and worn by now, but he still keeps them (rarely replaces it)

^ stinky guy (obv)

probably doesn't have a good ability to smell?

Annoying ppl is his top priority (<he's prob like. really bored at life at the same time)

Love language is to vaguely admit his feelings (maybe like to poems, ramblings, notes, etc?? idk how to properly explain this one tbh)

Writes abt something and then just doesn't end up finishing it 50% of the time

^ quotes. letters. thoughts. you name it.

thinks about the current state of life and sometimes complain abt it

Is very chaotic at most times, but his personality pretty much varies depending the person talking to

Alcohol not only to feel something, but to remember the good times in pm

dunken ramblings at a late hour (prob 2-5)

^probably reminisces abt the past A LOT

he likes the idea of memories and friends, is bad at creating/cherishing them

bad at mental feelings (good w personal feelings)

^aka. knows basic emotions all too well

Probably has girl talk hours with yosano/ranpo

Weird intrusive thoughts. Let's be real- this is Dazai.

Bad at feelings, but still very straightforward and confident about himself/when just talking casually, obv

Bad habit of falling in and out of love

Deep and unspoken desires that are more than just suicide

Implied abandonment issues (only for a few)

Interest in cannibalism/self harm in a romantic way

The feeling of violence empties Dazai mostly, but in an unhinged sort of way, he thought of it as romantic too (idk ask chuuya why)

Usually romanticize life (like. A LOT.)

^^ he like. dates multiple ppl at the same time just to experience more "human life" (bc wtf dym that he dated 400+ ppl < idk maybe i remembered that wrong but STILL.)

^^speaking of which, he's actually trying to make an effort to seem more like a person (like imagine urself just listening to an indie band in the early 2000s. that's what I'm feeling, idk)

^^ although it's more of a distraction to dazai than new fresh experiences, he still enjoys it

Aware of these things about himself, refuses to change/get rid of them (either laziness or whatever)

It's either he purposely ignored things, forgets about it, or doesn't know it. no inbetween. (<Like. Not acknowledging much on how it's his birthday, and stuff?)

okayyy n I think that'll be all for now! obv I might be changing stuff here and there, but I'll end it off here for now aywaysss (reminder for myself to make navigation tags

#ooc notes #ooc post #bsd rp blog #bsd roleplay #bsd rp #bungou stray dogs #bsd #bsd dazai #dazai osamu #dazai headcanons

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amidnight--dreary · 1 month

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20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks so much for the tag @zsparz !!!💖

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

166!

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

2.013.111. I write when I‘m stressed, can you tell?

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mostly the MCU. Frostiron my beloved 💕 I recently posted a Huskerdust fic, though, and a couple years ago I posted some Good Omens stuff! I have another Good Omens wip brewing, but I haven‘t worked on it in a while.

4. Top five fics by kudos

First one up would be Your Call, a multi-chaptered ABO Frostiron thing that‘s sadly unfinished because I‘m not happy with where it was going somehow. Then Corners of Reality, my baby, Yes or No, Dereliktion and last but not least Vita Nova!

5. Do you respond to comments?

God I try. I’m so bad at it though. On long fics I always answer comments on the last chapter when I post the new one, but I keep forgetting to reply to comments on older chapters or oneshots😭 They all mean the world to me though.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ohh I wrote a few angsty oneshots but it‘s been a while. Maybe Here, that‘s the most recent one. Of the older ones I remember all my light most clearly. Tony is dead or dying in both of these lol, poor Loki.

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I like to think the happiest endings in stories are ones you had to fight for a little bit, so maybe Dereliktion. That was a long ride filled with angst and messed up relationships lol. I think Haywire (my first and so far only Sentinel/Guide fic, I love that trope a lot akfj) also has a pretty fluffy ending, and I have some oneshots that are pretty much all fluff!!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Occasionally? Just the other day I got another anon ask on here complaining about my recent stories. Makes me extra thankful for everyone who takes the time to tell me they enjoy my stuff!!💖

9. Do you write smut?

I do! Pretty much all the time lol. I love writing Dom/sub relationships!

10. Craziest crossover?

I don‘t think I‘ve ever written one before?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yesss. I‘m not sure if they just didn’t know any better though, they deleted the copied parts as soon as I told them.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes!! I‘m always so happy when that happens!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Also yes. One year I did a whole Frostiron Advent calendar with @rabentochter (do you remember this????? How did we have the time??????? Insane) and we wrote a few more collabs beyond that.

14. All time favorite ship?

Frostiron!!!!!!!!!!!! I love my sassy messed up geniuses lol

15. What’s a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Uhhh I‘ve got a few. I‘d like to finish/rewrite Your Call. Once I also had the cracky fever dream of Loki doing random standup comedy shows in New York because he‘d KILL that. Can you imagine the sarcasm. The gallow‘s humor. Anyway I started that and then realized I Cannot Write Standup Routines at all. So there‘s that.

16. What are your writing strengths?

What I like to write the most is character and relationship development, so hopefully I‘m decent at that? Also dialogue, I hope, but that kinda comes and goes depending on the conversation.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I kinda suck thinking of longish plot that goes beyond “will they kiss?? Will they FUCK???” so I’ve been trying to practice that. Also scenes with lots of action😭

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I like it. I’ve been wanting to write a fic where Tony can properly show off his language skills but I don’t know enough languages to pull that off lol

19. First fandom you wrote in?

The VERY first was Dracula, back when I was 13 or so. I had a big thing for van Helsing back then. My first fandom on ao3 was Once Upon a Time!!

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Ooohhh. That would be Corners of Reality, because I worked on it for years before I even started posting it and I love how it turned out. It’s a slow burn time travel enemies to friends to almost lovers to enemies to friends to lovers to enemies to allies to lovers fic. I had SO much fun writing it I still think about it all the time😭😭

I’m just gonna tag some writers I know are on here: @endlessstairway @xottan @izhunny @arabesqueangel @bouncydragon no pressure though!! And if you see this and you’re a writer please consider yourself tagged!!💖

#ask game #frostiron #fic rec

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maochira · 1 year

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After reading Noa, Chris and Lavinho as father figures I can only imagine them giving the reader "the talk", just because they saw him talking very closely to a teammate or a friend. Chris is 100% the kind of father figure who says "you're at an age where your hormones are crazy, you need to understand a lot of things" and Lavinho wouldn't be ashamed to give the talk to the reader, making it clear that it's totally normal at his age. BUT NOA WOULD BE SO EMBARRASSED, HE KNOWS TALK IS NECESSARY BUT SHY TO TALK.

I LITERALLY CAN NOT STOP GIGGLING ABOUT THIS. IT'S SO TRUE. Omg that just really makes me want to write more for these headcanons and make them like a series,,, so request some stuff in asks!!!

The headcanons mentioned: Noa, Chris and Lavinho becoming your father figure

Series masterlist

Tags: gn!reader, sexual themes mentioned but nothing explicit, the headcanons linked above are good to know for context but not needed (basically reader has neglecting parents or no father figure in their life, so Noa/Chris/Lavinho decided to be their father figure), reader is a teenager

Giving "the talk" (headcanons)

Noel Noa

-he's so unsure about what you know already and what you don't know yet, but he really wants you to be educated so nothing bad happens. Like, he's pretty sure you learned about it in school but he wants to be double sure. Also, he thinks it's better for him to explain because then you can ask him questions if you have any

-also, he doesn't trust your biological parent(s) to educate you properly, so like many other things about you, he makes it his job to take care of

-Noa is definitely the type of guy to write notes on his hand or arm to look at so he can really make sure he won't forget anything

-he keeps telling himself "today I'll talk to them about it" then he gets too nervous about it and doesn't. It takes him at least 3 weeks until he finally drops the "I think there's something I need to talk about with you"

-he does it during one of those car rides in the rain after soccer practice. But he stops in some parking lot to talk to you about it

-and it ends up being easier for Noa than he expected. To his surprise, you were fairly well educated already, but there were still things you didn't know yet. So giving you "the talk" was a good decision

Chris Prince

-unlike Noa, he didn't put any thought into it before. I mean, he didn't get the chance to. Him giving you "the talk" happened very much out of nowhere for Chris, because you were the one who asked him about it

-he's a bit surprised, but also happy and proud that you trust him enough to ask him about something like this

-he's serious throughout the entire talk, making sure you understand everything properly

-he would repeat over and over how important consent for everyone involved is and how it's okay to say no and stop, even throughout "the act"

-when the conversation is coming to an end, he tries to make everything more lighthearted by saying some jokes but he would also be serious at the same time, making sure you know you can ask him any questions at any time

Lavinho

-not embarrassed or nervous at all, although he does think about how to address it to you for a couple days

-is very open and doesn't mind talking to you about this, it's a normal thing after all. And hey, you're very much like father and kid so he has to be the one to educate you, because no one else will do it well if he doesn't

-I feel like usually, even during serious conversations with you, he tends to goof around a lot to make you laugh every now and then, but this time he doesn't

-okay that was a lie he would definitely drop a random deez nuts joke in the middle of it and then continue talking as seriously as before, as if the joke never happened. If you continue laughing, he would tease you with "Uhmmm what's so funny??? This is serious" and then laugh along with you for a bit, before returning to a serious tone again

-he would mainly talk about how a lot can happen emotion-wise during puberty, not just related to "the talk", and that everything is completely normal

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yae-energy · 9 months

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ㅤㅤㅤㅤ╰┈─✩ ˚ ‧ random thoughts ‧ ˚

✧˖° synopsis : random headcanons i have pertaining to jjk

✧˖° cast and crew : yuji itadori, megumi fushiguro, nobara kugisaki

.ᐟ content warnings : cursing, me just rambling

⤑ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ authors note : just smth to post ! some of these i’ve probably posted about on here? but y’all will be seeing them again just cause i wanna expand on some of them 😝

yuji <3

- he’s allergic to animal dander but still pets dogs and cats and stuff cause he simply just doesn’t care. but because of this, he forgets that he needs to wash his hands after playing with them, so if he ends up toughing his face his eyes get all swollen and he’s all itchy

- he listens to britney spears when he cleans ! sorry, i don’t make the rules. he also blasts it really loud and megumi is absolutely sick of it LMAO

- his favorite way to pass time is play thumb wars with megumi. he never wins but he genuinely finds joy in it cause no one else wants to play since he beats everyone else

- he uses inside jokes he made with someone else on other people who don’t know the context and thinks its funny. cause ultimately they end up confused and just kinda smile and nod

- hates any “fresh linen” scents cause it gives him a headache

- has a peanut allergy and will still try to eat shit containing said allergen

- calls nobara’s hair a “fuck ass bob”

megumi <3

- keeps the volume on all his devices on at an even number. yes he gets irritated if it’s not

- he loves apple juice, like bro will actually down a whole gallon and still want another

- his favorite snack is apples and peanut butter

- he is allergic to most seafood

- he loves doing crossword puzzles ! like he’ll knock them shits out so fast it’s insane. he’s great at finding all the bigger words too

- prefers overhead headphones and has like 6 different pairs to go with different outfits (he also let nobara and yuji put stickers on them)

- he is a plain milk drinker

- he prefers savory over sweet, and loves to snack on crunchy foods

- he skips every other step when he goes up the stairs

nobara <3

- she was a movie star planet player

- her favorite food changes every few weeks so she never has had an actual “favorite food” , and that’s the same reason why she doesn’t have a favorite color

- she is an apple juice hater and loves orange juice. her and megumi argue over this constantly

- she cant cut her nails properly and always has maki do it for her

- she sleeps with socks on and is trying to get megumi and yuji to see her vision, she has yet to succeed though

- she doesn’t like mustard or mayonnaise

- she’s allergic to pollen and grass

- she hates jello

- loves coffee but doesn’t drink it much cause she’s worried about it staining her teeth

- doesn’t like cake icing

⤑ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ysl production credits : inspired by a conversation i had with @romiantic

⤑ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ tags : @morosis-haze @jogeto @mypimpademia @ivanari @planetlunaa @cosmiles @milesmolasses @chinieh @romiantic @stqrriichiigo

if you wish to be tagged in any future works, here’s my tag form to fill out <33

if you wish to submit a request, here’s my ask box :)

⤑ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ closing notes : def making a part 2 to this cause i need EVERYONE to hear my thoughts 😋. anyhow, love y’all, and drink some water cause it’s still hot as a bitch outside.

- xoxo, yves

#saint laurent productions #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen season 2 #jjk headcanons #jjk hcs #megumi fushiguro #megumi fushiguro headcanons #nobara kugisaki #nobara kugisaki headcanons #yuji itadori #yuji itadori headcanons

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prettyboykatsuki · 1 year

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jack(ass) of all trades | a. levi

✮ tags ; role reversal, gn!reader, reader is taller than levi, best friends to lovers, teasing, heated making out, petnames, modern au!, levi is mid thirties ish + a professor, reader is in I.T., 18+ bc they allude to sex and some nsfw stuff

✮ wc ; 3.1k (???)

✮ a/n ; levi.... i desire you so bad king. also maybe iffy characterization bc i dont write him often

✮ synopsis ; amidst the complicated endeavor of falling in love with one of his best friends, levi forget a crucial detail.

that you're a complete jackass when it comes down to it.

(or that time levi wants to progress in your relationship but you refuse to make the first move)

In an absolutely astounding turn of events, Levi Ackerman is head over heels in love with one of his best friends.

Perhaps, even more shockingly, he's also currently entrenched in a romantic relationship with them.

And really, truly - he doesn't know how the fuck he got here.

Life has a very funny way of turning his world upside down in the span of only a few months. It's happened to him multiple times - like some cruel and sick turning of fate that never ceases to make him feel bitter by the end. Not too bitter, because everything works out in it's own way.

But bitter in a why the hell do i need to go through this way. It's been an unfair and unjust life, both in big doses and small. Levi doesn't take it to heart because that would make him annoying. Anyone examining his life could say it objectively, Levi has had an excruciatingly hard life.

He always pushes through, because whatever. It is what it is, and he has to keep going. But it's true, certainly, that shits been rough from the get-go, but it always has a funny way of working out. His mothers untimely and sad death and being raised by a deadbeat uncle in a slum gave him motivation to turn his life around by any means.

And now he works as a professor with a cushy job. He nearly didn't have enough money for college because his advisor screwed his schedules and he needed an extra year. Nearly became homeless when trying to land a job after being kicked out of dorms when he was still in school.

A couple of robberies and bad dealings with people from when he was still out on the streets, it's been real. But Levi doesn't resent it because shit usually works out in the end as long as he tries to push through it. He's lucky to be living, despite of everything.

Character development or whatever.

A lot of the reason he was able to stay clear of anything too morbid was because of the people he get to meet in his life. His friends and family and all the people who've been with him for a long time.

Of those people, Levi hasn't even known you the longest.

But three months ago, he came to the conclusion that he was in fact, deeply in love with you.

And for another time in Levi's life, he was completely and utterly screwed. For the first time, he really had no fucking idea how this was going to work out.

You met Levi in college when you were both working at some run-down restaurant to make ends meet. You didn't get along great at first, reason being you were very different. Where Levi was quiet and aloof, you were personable and friendly. Too friendly for his tastes, Levi sort of assumed you were the shallow type.

You lacked the eccentricities that usually made him have some trust and there was something about the way you weaseled out of situations that made his stomach turn. Back when he was on the streets, you were the kind of person he'd always avoid.

Unpredictable.

Hange seems unpredictable, but they're actually calculating. Levi learned that quickly. You were actually unpredictable - as in Levi had no idea how to read you for the longest time. What you were up to, what you wanted.

It all culminated at a holiday work event, where Levi was properly shitfaced and catching some cold air. You were also drunk and you apparently decided to cut the shit for the night.

And in some corny twist of events, you had a long heart-to-heart where Levi smoked his first cigarette (your cigarettes) and got to see your laugh (your real laugh) for the very first time. From there, you became quick friends despite Levi's obvious grudge towards you.

You've been friends for nearly ten years now. You spend a lot of time with each other, especially lately since you've landed a job on his campus doing I.T.

In the ten years you've known each other, you've both been in several relationships. Semi serious ones at that, with your longest one being nearly 5 years. His longest only amounting to two, with a lot of interludes in between.

Levi has a complicated relationship with love. He always assumed maybe he was just especially picky, or maybe romance wasn't something he would be fulfilled by. He had a very close knit group of friends and he didn't often find himself longing for that kind of companionship. His relationships always ended amicably, over Levi's disinterest nearly always.

Your committed relationship had a rocky break-up but you were always a naturally affectionate person in the rest. Levi got to witness it real time, when you'd bring over whoever you were seeing. Doting and gentle, nose nudging someones neck with some liquor in you. Seeing that always made him yearn. He figured he just needed to meet someone he clicked with better, though he'd never uttered the words outloud.

But three months ago, you got this new job and now your proximity is really close. Instead of just in-the-same-city close. You saw him nearly everyday and often fixed the projector in his classroom with a goofy smile - calling him an old man in the process.

He usuaully eats lunch with you and you talk about a lot of nothing together. Sometimes you talk about relationships.

And one time, you tell Levi about the sort of dates you take people on. After he accuses you of being a shitty lover, in jest of course.

( "Thinking about you courting someone gives me chills." He says, over a cup of plain coffee. You pause.

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean? You can say a lot about me, but I'm a good lover, Ackerman."

He snorts. He knows you probably are but shakes his head anyway.

"Yeah? And hows that?"

You scoff, smile playing at your lips anyways. You look a little far-away for a minute before looking him in the eyes, head cocked.

"Mm. Some chivalry does the trick, usually." )

It was an awful epiphany with even worse timing. He was forcing the reaction down until he was on his way home. In his car, he slumped over the wheel and cursed as loud as he possibly could because that one moment was all it took.

Levi Ackerman was in love with one of his absolutely moronic best friends.

He's never been so upset. But it clicked all of a sudden, he had this realization. His longing for relationships was never about love but about you. His disinterest made sense when he pictured crossing those lines with you. Holding your hands and taking you on dates.

He was blushing. Just picturing it was making his face flush with embarrassment and Levi knew he was screwed.

You've got to understand. Levi was in love with his best friend who's friendship he valued a lot. And he's not one to overthink, but with no way of affirming or knowing your feelings - he was adamant to bury this emotion as far as possible. To lock it away forever and dismiss it as some crush.

But once the ball was rolling, Levi couldn't. He couldn't be normal around you. He was avoiding you and obviously you noticed and he even went as far as telling Hange and Erwin while wasted. And apparently they already knew, and thought he knew.

Everything was a mess for those two months of limbo. Levi knew he was going to have to address it eventually because by simply avoiding it he was already fucking up your friendship. So, like the no bullshit person he is - he gave you a time and place and decided he was going to confess.

He thought a bar would be good. To drink and eat snacks, and be casual. But the intimacy of the whole thing was making him a little sick, and it took him three beers to even bring it up. Five to muster up the courage and say it.

("I'm...in love with you." He says, words slurred. Heart pounding, fists curled and fully prepared for rejection.

It's silent. When he opens his eyes to look, you're taking sip of beer with a little surprise in your face.

"Oh. Me too.")

In a shocking twist of events, you were also in love with Levi. In fact, you knew that when your 5 year relationship ended. That's why it even ended. But you figured Levi would never be interested in a similar desperation to protect the friendship - you dated around and hoped it would die down eventually.

After that went down, Levi went to your apartment and you talked it out for a bit. Where to go from here, what to do. Levi told you that he wanted to take it slow, calling you a heathen knowing the details of your hook-ups. You really didn't protest. Just shrugged and said he could control the pace.

And for the last month, he'd been doing just that. Nothing much has changed in that time period.

In fact, nearly nothing has changed other than sometimes - Levi will hug you for a bit longer and holds your hand in private.

That's the thing, the issue, the debacle.

It's all fun. It's great, it's nice. And Levi really is wanting to take it slow or at least he thought he wanted to take it slow.

But it's been a month and you've never even kissed. He can't tell if you're just being sadistic or what, but you are keeping your promise of only letting him control the pace and it's really starting to get on his nerves.

___

You're coming to pick your boyfriend up for a movie date in five minutes.

Right now, he's waiting outside of the bar with Hanji - who's laughing their ass off about Levi's furious blush and apparent predicament.

"Dunno, Levi. You made your bed, so lie in it, yknow?"

"Fuck you," Levi buries his face into his scarf "I don't even know why I told you."

"Because I'm your good friend with sage advice,"

"Oh, yeah? What kind of sage advice are you offering, exactly? I'm dying to know." He deadpans. Hanji laughs more before their expression goes soft.

"Make the first move. Not saying your cat adjacent charm isn't working but," Hanji clicks their tongue between their teeth "Knowing Y/N, they're definitely not gonna make a move first if you drew the line."

"But why? I don't get it. They're being so obvious about wanting it too."

"Definitely to mess with you," Hange says, not missing a beat. Levi widens his eyes "Oh, come on. Don't look at me like that. They're your partner now but you know what they're like."

"What they're like?"

Hanji chuckles.

"A tease. A flirt. A prankster. Whatever you wanna call it. They're obviously messing with you and they're obviously planning on committing to the bit no matter the cost."

"You're joking."

"Do I sound like I'm joking?" Hanji sighs, looking at Levi (who's mouth is currently agape from disbelief) "Do you remember that one time, when he had that party at Erwin's house? During Christmas."

Levi nods.

"And do you remember how we got stuck in bathroom in the guest bedroom? And we could hear them hooking up? We were pretty shitfaced but—"

For the first time it clicks. In the midst of dating, of falling in love, of nonsense - Levi had forgotten. For one moment, he truly forgotten one crucial thing about you.

That you're a jackass and a lover of malicious, indiscriminate compliance. If he were being nice about it, a tease.

You're—you're fucking—you're messing with him.

And Levi is so annoyed for a minute he thinks he's gonna break up with you right the. It must show on his face because Hanji laughs harder than ever before and Levi is red in the face because how annoying is that. You're not going to kiss Levi until he's left with not a shred of dignity.

Because you're an asshole, and that little smile you do is definitely sadisitic. Fuck.

With cosmic irony, your car pulls up the minute he's come to this same conclusion. He's hardly there when he opens the door, and slides in your seat. The sound of Hanji's laugh haunts him as he shut the door, and he doesn't process the first 10 words you say.

"Well, anyway, you ready to watch the movie?"

Levi grunts.

"Yeah. Ready."

As is the pattern for Levi at this point, no matter how much he tries - once he realizes something, it refuses to detach from his conscious unless he addresses it.

You drive to the movies, buy two tickets, and Levi holds your seats while you go buy popcorn. You watch the trailers before-hand in silence, and you have the decency to hold his hand while that happens.

And you watch the film in silence. Levi is somewhat able to pay attention. It's a good movie, a psychological thriller that he's been itching to watch for a while and it meets his expectations. And it's all fine, until the movie inevitably ends.

You leave the theater, make it outside, and decide to go for a little walk and maybe get something to eat.

And Levi, no matter how much he tries, can't let it go.

Before he knows what he's doing, he grabs your wrist and looks around before pulling you into the closest, poorly lit alley.

He can hear you make a little noise of surprise as your back hits the pavement, a little lost. His hands on the wall behind you. It's times like this he's annoyed about the height difference, but he grabs the lapel of your coat to knock his forehead into yours.

His irritation must show in his face because you look concerned. Good.

"Uh. Baby? Gonna explain or—"

"You," He says, menacing. Seething, really "You're doing this on purpose."

You smile.

You grin. You fucking—

"What are you talking about?" You say, feigning innocence and Levi really considers knocking you out for a minute.

"Don't you play me dumb with me, you little shit. You're doing it on purpose." He repeats. You look so smug. If it wasn't so annoyingly sexy, he would be even angrier.

"Doing what on purpose, though?"

Oh, you. You're gonna make him say it. The nerve.

"You're avoiding it. Initiating. It's been an entire month, we're grown adults and we haven't even kissed. I thought you were just dense, but no - you're doing it on purpose."

You hold back a laugh, using your tongue to run over your lip.

"You think so?"

He hits your chest.

"I know so. We started dating and I forgot you were a complete jackass."

"Kinda on you," You say, smiling at him. He hates you for looking so pleased "Are you saying you wanna kiss me, Levi?"

"Use your brain for a minute."

"No, no. I'm saying," Levi almost chokes when he feels your hand around the base of his neck. How you're stood up, knees bent - inches from his face. His hearts pounding. It's not like he's never kissed anyone before, so why is he so nervous "Do you want me to kiss you, Levi?"

"You're annoying"

"I'm respecting your boundaries." You counter. He frowns.

"Just do it already."

"Sorry, sorry."

Like he said, he's kissed people before. Plenty actually. He used to get drunk in college and makeout with strangers and he's not exactly unfamiliar with it. It's not different, or it shouldn't be different. It shouldn't feel different.

Maybe it's the months long wait, or maybe it's the mountain of feelings he's had to reconcile with in the last few weeks alone. But he doesn't think he's ever been so conscious of a kiss in his entire life. He's probably never been so conscious of any one person in the history of ever.

He knows. It's just a kiss. Hardly anything to scoff at. But he's just so affected, for a minute - it feels like he's forgotten how to do anything but melt. He feels like he's gonna turn into a puddle of water, and his hands are around your shoulders. You are frustratingly good at kissing. You're slow and easy, and your press your lips against him and coax it a little deeper.

And your hands travel down his waist and he doesn't stop you from touching him. He feels blood go somewhere it shouldn't and he pulls away before it can get too bad. He refuses to let your first sexual endeavor be in some shitty alley - but by the time he's pulled back, he's longing to kiss you again.

You give him a smile, ditzy and annoying and so charming.

"Already over it?"

"Shut up. I'm not having sex in alley for our first time."

"Another time, then?" You tease, tilting your head to one side "We can makeout a little though, right?"

"You're terrible. A menace to society. I hope you get arrested."

"I'm sorry," You say, dragging the syllables out "It was kinda cute seeing you get frustrated though. Over little old me, at that? Once in a lifetime opportunity."

"Count your days and watch your back."

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry. Lemme make it up to you?"

He huffs, and pushes himself up to kiss you easier. God it feels good to kiss you. Like being given some ounce of relief after being starved of it for months. He wants to touch you. He wants to do a lot more than that, but for now - he lets himself hug your body as you kiss. You hold him tight, arms around his waist - creeping under the waistband of his pants but not going further.

The pressure of your body, and the warmth, and your hands. God, your hands feel so good. Your lips are soft and you taste like theater popcorn and soda. Levi has never felt so fucking desperate for a kiss in his life and he hates it a little. But he imagines when people talk about passion, this must be what they mean.

You pull away, just for a minute and Levi nearly chases you before getting a grip on reality. You giggle against his mouth.

"I like kissing you."

"If you ever pull some shit like this again, you won’t hear the end of it."

"I'll take that as reciprication."

He kisses you this time, face in your neck with a sigh.

"Read the room."

"Right, right. My bad, baby."

#writing tag #levi x reader #aot x reader #aot x gender neutral reader #levi fluff #aot fluff

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kaminocasey · 1 year

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25 Days of Life Day: Day 13 - Decorating the Palace with Boba

a/n: I wasn't too confident with this one so don't feel bad if you dislike it lol.

warnings: pregnancy, a teensy lil bit of angst if you really look? idk.

25 Days of Life Day Masterlist

“You know we have people to do that, right?” Fennec chuckles, leaning against the wall while you finish putting tinsel around one of four trees.

“Mmhm, but I’d rather do it how I want.” You smile.

“I’m gonna go grab the-” Fennec starts.

You and Boba have been married for two years now and Fennec still doesn’t like you doing your own stuff around the palace. Granted, you’re seven months pregnant and maybe a tad bit more fragile than you were last Life Day but this is where you find peace in your life. Decorating the place, yourself.

“No, don’t. I’m content doing it.” You assure her. “I promise.”

“And what do you think Boba is going to say when he gets back and sees his very pregnant wife doing all this extra work?” She quirks an eyebrow.

“He’d be proud to see me take initiative?” You chuckle.

“Would I?” You both hear Boba’s voice in the hall.

You turn around, smiling at your husband. You’d missed him so much since he’d been away on business with whatever it was he was up to these days. Gathering allies, or visiting old friends. You can’t keep up.

“Hello, my love.” You grin.

“Don’t ‘Hello, my love’ me.” He looks firmly at you. “Please, get down.” “Fine.” You huff and start to step down off the ladder with Fennec giving you a hand.

“We’ll talk later.” Boba nods to you before walking away.

Fennec gives you an “I told you so” look and you roll your eyes, walking away. It wasn’t like you were that high up off of the ground. But Boba is Boba and he’s always been overprotective of you. You used to find it endearing and sexy. But with being pregnant and all these hormones pumping through your body, it’s starting to be a bit much. Life Day has always been your favorite holiday and Boba knows it.

“Boba.” You call out to him.

He stops and turns toward you, his expression softening. You can tell whatever it was that was keeping him away didn’t go well.

“I missed you.” You reach up and cup his face, kissing him.

He pulls you against him, as much as he can with your belly in the way, wrapping his arms around you.

“I missed you too, princess.” He murmurs against your lips. “I’m sorry about-” You wave your hand, dismissing it. “Already forgotten.” “I’ll never understand how I got so lucky.” He smiles down at you, kissing your forehead.

“Stop thinking about business for a bit… decorate with me.” You look up at him with begging eyes. “Please?”

He sighs, softly, pulling his hands back around to rest on your stomach. “You know I can never say no to that face.”

“And just think you’ll have a daughter with a face like it in a few months. You’ll never stand a chance against two of these faces.” You laugh, leading him back to the tree.

“I’m doomed.” He chuckles as he stands up on the stool so that he can hang the ornaments for you.

“Yes, but you’ll be happy about it.” You shrug, handing him the ornaments.

He grins down at you, obviously forgetting about whatever it was that put him in a bad mood earlier. “With you as my wife and our perfect child, how could I not be?”

He continues to help you decorate the palace until you retire to bed so he can properly apologize for earlier, which you gladly and eagerly accept.

TAGS: @grievouus @brynhildrmimi @madameminor @dumfanting @rain-on-kamino @misogirl828 @rexandechosandwich @corona-one @tecker @ladykatakuri @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @twistedstitcher27 @zoeykallus @maulslittlemeowmeow @littlemousedroid @arctrooper69 @rexxdjarin @agenteliix @padawancat97 @idlenesses @hated-by-me @sleepingsun501

#25 days of life day #boba fett #tbobf #boba fett x reader #boba fett x you #tw: pregnancy

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rubyreduji · 11 months

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eat your young | the games pt 3

tags: hunger games!au, fake dating, angst warnings: death, violence, blood, gore, probably inaccurate medical stuff (its fiction shut up) wc: 4.4k an: you are legally obligated to NOT be mad at me

m.list

That’s two more gone. Ten remain. Half of them are careers. You stare at the fire blankly.

You don’t want to be on this island anymore. You don’t want to think about how Wonwoo died less than thirty feet away, but you know on this island you can get fresh water and a good supply of food, so you don’t dare move the boys.

“Y/N-ah.” Jihoon’s voice is soft as he approaches you. He sits down next to you and wraps his arms around your waist, resting his chin on your shoulder. You slightly melt into his arms, enjoying the safety of his arms locked around you, just for a moment.

“I’m okay Ji, I just need a minute.”

“I know, I know. I just wanted to tell you that Hansol and I are going to sleep soon. Please don’t stay up all night. Wake one of us up to take watch, okay?”

You nod. “Let Hansol-ah into the sleeping bag tonight, okay?”

“Okay. Don’t forget to put the fire out soon.” Jihoon presses a kiss to your forehead. It’s the first time either of you have shown any physical affection other than hand holding or cuddling at night. The feeling lingers there even after Jihoon gets up.

You huff. That’s another problem that you don’t want to worry about. The stupid crush you have on your fake boyfriend. You think you may have had a crush on him even before either of you were reaped, but now it’s real. It’s not just a passing crush on the idea of someone. No, now he’s here and real and holding your hand and kissing your forehead and making your heart go crazy.

You don’t think it’s healthy to feel this many emotions at once. Being in the Hunger Games is not for the faint of heart, you will say that.

You grieve for Wonwoo. He was your friend and your ally and he saved your life. By morning though, you will be back to good and ready to assess the next problem that arises. You have to be if you want to keep Jihoon and Hansol safe. You have to push all personal emotions aside so you can think properly and just get through the next challenge.

It’s late when you put the fire out. It’s way past the nightly recap. You didn’t bother watching tonight. You sit in the silent dark and stare at the moon. It’s not real, just another thing made by the Gamemakers, but it still brings you some comfort.

You think about your family. You hope your sister is sleeping right now. You hope your father isn’t worrying too much about you. Joshua is probably up right now. He’s always been a night owl.

“Hey Shua,” you whisper into the night. You use your old nickname for him. The one you gave him when you two were in elementary school. You’ve graduated to calling him ‘Josh’, especially in public, but every once in a while you’ll revert back to the old nickname. It helps remind you both of your past together and how far you have come.

You’re not sure if he’s going to be watching. He was never someone who would watch intently. Neither were you, but you kept more tabs on things than he did. Maybe he’s watching just because it’s you. Maybe he’s not watching for that exact reason.

“I miss you. I miss you a lot. You know after thirteen years of friendship you’d think we’d be tired of each other, yet it’s only been a week away from you and it’s like I’m going crazy. It’s hard not having you here. It’s like a part of me is missing. Well, not like. A part of me is missing. You.

“Remember when you used to accompany me during work and you’d complain about it the whole time while I chopped down tree after tree, but you stayed because it meant we could spend more time together? I wish we could go back to doing that. Jihoon and Hansol are good company, but they’re not you. I’ll love you forever, my Shua-yah.”

You’re pretty sure the Capitol isn’t going to air your little speech. You don’t care though. It makes you feel better being able to talk to Joshua in some way.

The rest of the night you wonder what District 7 has been up to. When the sunrises you look over and smile softly at the sight of Jihoon and Hansol in the sleeping bag. They’re adorable smushed together with their sleeping faces.

You stand up and all of your bones crack from sitting in the same place the whole night. You stretch your body out and grab the bag. You find the tap and put it in a tree before collecting water for the day.

You hear rustling coming from behind you and soon arms are wrapping around your waist, a sleepy face pressed to your back. “You didn’t sleep last night.”

“I’ll sleep later, after Sol wakes up.” You lean back into Jihoon’s embrace. “I wouldn’t have been able to sleep anyways.”

“Remember, you have to take care of yourself too.”

Jihoon’s words make your mind flash back to your final conversation with Soonyoung.

Promise me one more thing? Take care of yourself as well, yeah? I know your new focus is on Jihoon, but you’re important too.

You know that if you don’t care for yourself, you won’t be much help to Jihoon either. It doesn’t matter if you actually take care of yourself to take care of yourself, it won’t matter in the end. You need to be at your best for Jihoon though.

You turn around so you can face him. His hair is a mess and you reach up to fix it. “Let’s go to the shore today. I wanna wash in the water.”

Jihoon nods, though you have a feeling he’s only half listening. You lean down and kiss his forehead, as payment for the one he gave you last night. As you and Jihoon are in your own little world, you can hear Hansol starting to wake up as well.

Jihoon squeezes you once more. “Go sleep. We’ll go to the shore later.”

You nod. With a yawn you climb into the sleeping bag, and let sleep overtake you.

When you wake up, it’s way past noon. The sun shines bright in your eyes and you crawl out of the sleeping bag. Hansol and Jihoon are both lounging about and both perk up when they see you’re awake.

You three walk down to the shore where you get into the water. You clean your body off from all of the dirt and grime and blood from the last few days. The salt water still doesn’t leave you feel completely clean, but it’s something.

Hansol and Jihoon do the same and you’re all feeling slightly better afterwards. You stand on the sand, waiting for them to finish up. You glance over at the island in the middle of everything. You can see the glint of the metal Cornucopia in the distance. The place where all the careers reside.

“Y/N-ah,” Jihoon pulls you from your thoughts. “Ready to go back?”

“Yeah.” You pull your eyes away from the Cornucopia and grab Jihoon’s hand.

Another canon goes off later that evening. You guys are sitting around the fire, eating roasted nuts that Hansol found. The sound of the cannon doesn’t make you jump anymore, but it still caches your attention.

There are only two other non-career tributes out there. You wonder if it was one of them. You don’t have to wonder for too long because the nightly recap starts. When you look up at the sky you’re not expecting to see a career.

The picture of the District 4 boy you attacked on the very first day sits high in the sky. Hyunwoo? Something like that. You wonder if his leg injury got to him, or something else did. It doesn’t really matter. What matters is there are now only four careers left.

The night is peaceful. The next morning is as well.

You find a hunk of wood and grab a knife. You’re not sure who’s knife it is anymore, but it doesn’t really matter. You’re glad one of your hobbies can be done with even the simplest tools you have available to you.

The Capitol citizens have to be finding this funny right now. People are dying and you’re sitting here carving wood.

“Hey, that’s my song,” Jihoon says. Your concentration is broken and you look up at him.

“What?”

“You were humming,” Jihoon explains.

“Oh, sorry. Force of habit.” Whenever you’re working you end up humming a song. You don’t know many songs though, so you always go back to the same two or three you’ve heard Jihoon singing.

“Don’t apologize, I like hearing it.” Jihoon looks a bit shy and you think it’s adorable.

“You two are gross,” Hansol says, breaking the moment. “It was better when Wonwoo was here, so I had something to focus on that wasn’t you two.”

You laugh lightly. “Sorry Sollie, we’ll tone it down.”

You don’t want to tone it down though. You want to keep it going. You want to do more and have more and be more.

The rest of the afternoon is quiet. Then evening comes.

While everyone is sitting around, you sit up from where you’re leaning against one of the trees. There’s a rustling of leaves and in an instant you’re up on your feet. There’s a flash of something and suddenly you’re pulling both Jihoon and Hansol up, pushing them ahead of you.

“Mutts!” You yell out and start to take off at a full running pace. You glance behind you and quickly look away. It looks to be a mutation between a rhino and a large feline. It has the horn and build of a rhino, but the coat, teeth, and paws of a jungle cat. There’s only one, but it’s large and fast and you’re doing your best just to get through the thick foliage of the jungle.

The only thing that makes you feel even a sliver better about this situation is that you can clearly see Jihoon and Hansol in front of you. As long as you’re between them and the mutt, everything will be okay.

You’re a bit too focused on the boys though, because you trip. You land with a hard thud on the ground and you can barely even think before the mutt’s on you. You let out a scream as it tears sinks it’s claws into your arm.

It doesn’t let up and you’re sure you’re going to die. You feel something digging into your side and you remember your axe is on your belt. You struggle to detach it from your belt. As you do so, the mutt moves and grabs right onto your leg with it’s teeth. You’re sure if it wasn’t for the sheer panicked state of adrenaline you’re in right now you’d be dead.

With a cry you lift your axe and slam the blade down into the skull of the mutt. The mutt’s teeth loosen up on you and falls dead. Your arms fall limp as well and you do your best to remember to breathe.

Your ears are ringing and you can hear the faint sounds of Hansol and Jihoon but your vision is starting to go and you’re scared. You’re so, so scared.

Jihoon can’t breathe. There’s a lump in his throat and a stab in his heart and you’re going to die and Jihoon can’t breathe.

He sinks down next to you and cradles your head in his lap. There’s fear in your eyes and that scares Jihoon the most, because he doesn’t think he’s seen you scared a day in his life.

“J-Ji,” you call out to him.

“Shhh, shh, I’m here. Hi, baby, I’m here.”

A tear rolls down your eyes and Jihoon quickly moves to brush it away. He doesn’t feel too far away from crying himself. There’s so much blood. So much blood and your leg doesn’t even look like a leg anymore and you’re breathing is slowing and you’re gasping for air.

“Ji, Ji,” you sob, tear freely falling now, “I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die anymore. Please Jihoon.” Your fingers dig into Jihoon’s arm, pleading for his help in some way.

“Shh, shh, you’re okay, it’s okay, you’re not going to die. I- you’re fine. We’re gonna be fine.” Jihoon tries to keep the panic out of his voice as he comforts you, but he knows he’s failing. “I- Soonyoung please help.”

Jihoon cups your face with his hands, and brushes his thumb over your cheek, hoping to calm you some. Jihoon leans down to press a kiss to your forehead. The taste of salt and dirt linger on his lips.

Ding.

A parachute falls down next to Hansol. He quickly picks it up and opens it. Inside is a plethora of medical supplies and Hansol quickly gets to work. Death may work quick, but Kwon Soonyoung works quicker.

“My mom’s a medic,” Hansol explains quickly as he feeds you a couple pills. “I don’t know as much as she does, but I can do this.” His hands are shaking, but Jihoon doesn’t have a doubt in his mind that he can save you.

Hansol takes a piece of cloth and ties it around your thigh and uses a stick to twist until it’s tight. Jihoon’s never seen a medical procedure like it before but he assumes it’s to cut off blood so you don’t lose even more than you already have.

He then moves on to your arm. He takes some of your water reserves and cleans off your arm before grabbing the needle and thread that was already in your first aid kit grabbed from the Cornucopia. His fingers are still a bit shaky as is his breath as he stabs into your arm the first time. It seems like he’s also trying to keep himself from crying, the only thing stopping him is having to stitch you up. It’s clearly a novice job, but Hansol eventually patches up your whole arm.

Despite your arm being taken care of, your leg is still mangled. Jihoon can’t look at it for too long or he’ll actually throw up. He can see a bit of bone though and it’s all meaty and bloody and slightly bent out of shape.

Even Hansol looks disgusted as he looks down at it. Inside the container that Soonyoung sent is some ointment, but Jihoon isn’t sure how much that can help when you have a literal chunk of your leg gone. Still Hansol rubs it onto your skin where he can and then wraps and splints your leg.

You’ve calmed down and your breathing is soft, but steady, and Jihoon thinks it has to do with the medicine Hansol fed you at the start. Jihoon has been petting your hair the whole time, watching Hansol meticulously. There’s a tight feeling in his chest and it doesn’t go away until your body shifts just the slightest bit.

You weakly reach out for Hansol and he helps you by grabbing your hand in his. “Th-thank you.”

Jihoon’s thankful for Hansol and Soonyoung as well, but he also knows that if you don’t real help soon, you won’t make it much longer. The suffocating fear that you’re going to die creeps up Jihoon’s throat and he does his best to swallow is back down.

From that start, it was clear you were going to die. You were going to lay down your life to say Jihoon’s. It was something he had to come to terms with. Now that he’s faced with the reality of it though, he can’t accept it. Not yet. He’s not ready to let you go yet. He needs more time.

So maybe he likes you. Maybe he’s always been a little interested in you. The strong, reliable woodsman from District 7. Now you two are here together and he has you but he’s about to lose you and he can’t handle it.

Hansol gets up and leaves to go back for the supplies. Jihoon’s took shaken to do anything other than pet your hair. Hansol comes back soon and Jihoon finally gets up.

Together they make a shelter. They tie the tarp to a couple trees like a lean-to and put branches and leaves over it so it’s more hidden.

Your face isn’t in the sky when night falls though, and that’s all that matters right now.

The night is long and Jihoon doesn’t sleep a wink. He can’t, too busy monitoring you. When morning comes Jihoon finally gets a good look at you in full light. Your skin looks dull and sickly and Hansol’s stitching on your arm looks even worse in the broad daylight.

Jihoon takes a peek down at your leg. It’s still all bandaged up and Jihoon can’t even imagine the monstrosities that lay under the coverings. Jihoon can only hope that more medicine will be sent soon.

You’re sleeping right now and Jihoon keeps a hold on your hand, but only so he can keep his fingers pressed to your pulse. It’s slow and faint, but it’s there.

Soonyoung sent the group a good portion size of soup and Jihoon must think the sponsors feel bad for them. Jihoon doesn’t really care, as long as it helps you stay alive.

The next few days are slow. Other killings happen, but to other tributes, and Jihoon doesn’t really care as long as it’s not you. None of it’s okay, this whole situation is fucked up, but deep down Jihoon knows that every canon that fires gets you and him closer to winning. To surviving.

You spent most of your time sleeping. Jihoon doesn’t care though, because it seems little by little your strength is coming back. Especially with the extra healing cream Soonyoung sent. It came with a note to Jihoon to keep it up and Jihoon thinks it relates to the fake dating act they’re putting on.

Jihoon’s cried multiple times since you got attacked and he spends all of his time coddling you. Soonyoung must think Jihoon is putting on an act for the camera and the Capitol is eating it up, but little does Soonyoung know that Jihoon is genuine in everything he does. Every forehead kiss, every hand squeeze, every sweet word, he means it.

The cream is doing its job though and you’re slowly starting to recover. Your arm has healed nicely and you’re able to stand and even walk a little bit, but your leg is still messed up and it bothers you if you use it too long. Capitol technology is a wonder, but it’s still not perfect. But you’re alive, and that’s all that matters right now.

It’s down to seven tributes. You think about how that means there’s going to be family interviews. Your dad and your sister and Joshua. You miss Joshua. You’re glad the leg that got fucked up isn’t the one that has your bracelet on it because you’d honestly be more upset about the bracelet than your leg.

You’ve been dying lately though. Jihoon keeps coddling you, and it’s not that you don’t like it, but you so desperately hate being a sitting duck. You made Hansol find you a large stick that you’ve carved into a walking stick for you.

You force yourself to get up and walk every once and while. It’s been four days since you got attacked and you’ve been doing nothing for too long. Another island has sunk since then and two tributes have died, one being the other District 1 girl. Nayeon, maybe? That means it’s just three careers, your group of three, and one more tribute left.

The three careers left are the ones you like the least. Seungcheol and Jeonghan from District 2, and Mingyu from District 4. Not only do they have disgusting personalities, but they also pose a large threat to your group, especially now that you’re injured. If you don’t get your leg back in working shape soon, your whole group is in a lot of danger.

It’s the next day when you realize that you’re just about out of food. Your leg has been screaming at you since you woke up and even with the painkillers Hansol keeps feeding you, your leg is still killing you.

“We need stuff,” you groan.

“We’ll go get it, you rest,” Jihoon tells you.

“No,” you protest. “My leg is so stiff, I need to move it. Please. It’ll be okay.”

“No. Remember, you need to take care of yourself. I’m not kidding this time Y/N. Hansol and I will be back soon with food. If I found out you’ve moved from this spot, I’m not going to be a happy boyfriend.” Jihoon’s commanding voice and the use of the word boyfriend has you shutting up.

Jihoon drops a kiss on your forehead before he and Hansol head out in different directions. Just a week ago you were roaming these woods with Jihoon and killing a hog together. Wonwoo was still with you guys and he and Hansol were out finding you guys nuts and fruits. So much has changed since then.

You sigh and reach for the bag. You can luckily grab it without much effort and you grab your piece of wood and your knife out of the bag. If you can’t do anything, the least you can do is go back to your carving.

The sun is starting to move and you’re wondering where the boys are when you hear a blood curdling scream. It sounded like Hansol.

“Sol?” You call out experimentally. No response. He didn’t sound that far away. Dread starts to fill you. Something isn’t right. “Sol?” You struggle to your feet and look around frantically. Where is he?

"Y/N! Y/N!" The voice is panicked and high pitched and it makes your older sibling mode kick into gear. As quickly as you can, you start to race through the trees. Pain shoots up your leg, but you keep going. You’re not sure where you’re going but you need to find him.

"Sol-ah? Hansol!”

You nearly miss it. Nearly miss him while running, but a glint catches your eye and you sprint over. Lying on the ground is Hansol’s body, blood soaks his jumpsuit and his eyes are barely staying open. The glint you caught was his knife, still in his hand. His leg is tangled up in some jungle vines.

“Y/N?” Hansol reaches his hand up and you drop to your knees and grab onto his hand and pull it to your chest.

“What happened? Who did this?”

“The District 2 boy. I got caught in the vines. He found me and I tried to fight him off with the knife but he overpowered me.” His voice is soft, and his breathing is unsteady, his words taking a while to come out.

“I can save you. Like you saved me. I can fix this, just-”

Hansol clutches your hand tighter. “No Y/N, you can’t. You can’t save us all, it’s okay. Jihoon should win.”

You can’t save him. Hansol is going to die and you couldn’t protect him. You grab your axe and start to cut the vines away from his leg. When he’s finally free, you scoop him up and start to walk towards the edge of the island. Your leg is screaming at you, begging you to stop, but you can’t pay attention to it. You can’t when you have to focus on Hansol.

You set Hansol down on the sand and cradle his head in your lap. You don’t care if it’s fake, if it’s just made by the Gamemakers, Hansol deserves to have this. The sky is a myriad of colors over the ocean and you pet Hansol’s hair, trying not to drop tears on him.

It isn’t fair.

“It’s okay Y/N.” Hansol’s hands reach up to grab your face. He uses his last bit of strength to pull you face down to kiss your cheek. “Thank you for taking care of me.” He pats around his jacket pocket before pressing something into your hand.

You press your hands over Hansol’s as his eyes go blank and his arms go limp. You close his eyes and hold his body tight to yours. A cannon goes off. You don’t move until you hear a hovercraft coming to take Hansol. You gently lay his body down and back away as he’s lifted into the air. Your own outfit is now dirty with his blood and your leg is now even worse than earlier, but you don’t care.

You look down at your hand and sitting in your palm are two matching bracelets. Faded, worn leather braided together. District tokens. You clutch them close to your chest. One belonged to Hansol, the other to Chan, his district partner.

“Y/N? Hansol? I heard yelling.” Jihoon pushes through the trees but stops when he sees you on the sand. “Y/N…?”

“He- he- I didn’t even know they were on the island. I don’t know where they came from or where they went but I couldn’t save him and now he’s-,” you can’t continue, your words getting caught in your throat. You wonder if the pain in your chest will be enough to kill you.

“Oh, oh. Oh no.” Jihoon quickly moves to you, sinking down to his knees as well. You bury your face in his chest and sob. Jihoon cries too. Soft, silent tears, his chest taking shaky breaths every once in a while.

You cry and you cry and you cry until it’s it dark out and then you eventually just…stop crying. You’re too dehydrated and your head hurts and you know that crying won’t do anything. It won’t bring Hansol back, and at it sure as well won’t help you avenge his death.

Jihoon helps you back to the shelter and you basically fall to the ground as soon as you get back. Pain is overtaking your whole body and as soon as you hit the ground your eyes white out and the world goes black. Your last thought before you pass out is that there’s only six people left now, and District 2 is going to get it.

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milkymoon2483 · 2 years

Text

Kiss it better

Pairing: Jake Lockley x female reader

Summary: This fic explores cheating from the cheater’s perspective. You are a wife and mother, content with your life…until something awakens within you, and it will not go back to sleep.

Rating: 18 + Minors DNI, this stuff is for grown-ups

Warnings: Angst galore, Cheating, infidelity, SMUT, Unprotected P in V (reader makes all sorts of bad decisions folks).

Dedications:

Thank you miss @cozykalii for sending me down the fanfic rabbit hole all those months ago. Thank you Cici @astroboots for being amazing and for answering all of my asks. Thank you bestie (you know who you are) for helping me bring this baby out. ;-) Thank you @foxilayde for allowing me to tag you, and for the amazing stuff you write. Lastly, English is not my first language, Spanish is not even my 4th (thanks Google Translate) I tried my very best.

Word count: ~8500

You were watching TV while mindlessly playing on your phone when it happened, you looked at the screen and the broad chest was the first thing that caught your attention, the camera moved down to his big veiny hands as he grabbed the weapon. Sweat glistened on his face, collecting in the cupid’s bow above his lips. You didn't know the actor’s name but you watched breathlessly, the surge of heat to your core was immediate. Oh my goodness.. you whispered under your breath. You wanted to lick the beads of sweat off his lips and take his thick fingers into your mouth, watch him gaze at you lustfully. Your husband’s snores from the other side of the couch informed you that any satisfaction you were after would need to be achieved independently.

Not that he would be much help anyway…

It’s not that you didn’t love him or were not content with your life, it’s just that your sex life was never perticularly exciting. And it got much less so after the birth of your son. Babies would do that to you.

You knew you had everything that anyone could even want; A loving husband, a wonderful smart kid, a great job and a big beautiful house. You were happy to settle and keep your sexdrive in some hidden drawer at the back of your mind, stuffed behind embarrassing memories and questionable decisions. However that night it crept right back out, like a pest you could not get rid of, demanding your attention.

The batteries in your vibrator ran out the following week. You looked at the anatomically accurate member with disappointment. Feeling both frustrated at the sudden loss of pleasurable vibrations and ashamed at the amount of times you've abused it. You had plenty of orgazms but it was clear to you that you barely began to scratch your itch, you needed more.

You wished you could dream about it. Even just once, you wished your mind would conjure a proper erotic dream. That would be enough for you, with all of your daydreaming and longing and inappropriate googling, you'd think that it would be able to come up with a decent dream. Alas your realm of dreams was filled with random stressful scenarios.

You would find yourself on the streets naked (not in a sexy way), or you'd forget to pick up your kid from daycare, or you would leave something on the stove for too long, causing your entire house to engulf in flames. “Some very anxiety-ridden-demented-senile shit” as you described it to a friend.

Any semi-sexual dreams would almost always be about rejection, or dissatisfaction, or the inability to have any privacy. They would almost always feature your husband. Because apparently your sleeping brain couldn't be bothered to keep up with your very filthy and creative waking brain. It had a very impressive curated selection of men to choose from, but it went with the blob snoring next to you. All you wanted is to be properly fucked, licked, adored, desired…to feel the delicious weight of a man on top of you as he glides into you, his kisses flowing from your mouth to your jawline and to the neck, him whispering softly how good you make him feel, how soft and sweet and wet you are for him…and a dream would do. You could live with a memory of it, it would possibly sustain you just for a little bit longer, maybe would quench your thirst, even slightly.

*******

You were on your second chocolate bar of the day, looking at Vivienne typing away on her computer. She looked you up and down, judging silently your choice of afternoon snack.

She's always on some diet or another. Probably explains the constant resting bitch face.

You however, have been replacing sex with chocolate for weeks now, attempting to fend off the intrusive thoughts and somehow satisfy the hunger that was pulsating inside of you, permanent and relentless.

The evening came quickly, you were grateful work managed to keep your mind busy. You were yawning repeatedly while trying to catch a cab. After waking up at 5AM that morning and working for 10 hours, the exhaustion was making your eyes sting. The rush hour meant that it would take some time, but to your surprise not a minute passed before a cab stopped.

The smell hit you as soon as you sat down. Musky masculine cologne mixed with something fresh and minty, and the faintest scent of a man, ghost like, almost as if you could smell his pheromones. You inhaled sharply, breathing in the scent. It brought back a memory that you couldn’t quite place. You never had a date that smelled this amazing, let alone a cab driver. “Where to miss?” the driver asked, his voice husky with a hint of an accent. You gave him your address, piercing brown eyes gazed at you from the rear view mirror.

He drove silently through the dark streets, gentle Spanish music was playing in the background, the backseat was very spacious, dimly lit, you began to doze off, surrendering to the fatigue that had built up throughout the day.

Jake looked through the mirror, you were leaning on your palm, breathing peacefully.

Your delicate neck was exposed, and he noticed the slight cleavage of your button-down top. You looked tired, but serene.

He usually drove in silence, not eager to share his thoughts on current affairs or to have to listen to people’s problems. You seemed to appreciate it, as you fell asleep within minutes. He smiled to himself. He wished for a moment all of his passengers were asleep, which would have made the job much easier.

Jake parked the cab in front of your house, the suburban street was quiet.

“Miss? Miss?... We're here, miss, wake up”

You did not budge, your breath heavy and steady. He waited a few more seconds, inspecting your sleeping body. Your head was still leaning on your palm, hair softly cascading down your shoulders. There was something picturesque about your pose. You looked like a painting or a photograph.

"Necesito despertarla.. mierda" (I need to wake her, shit)

You stirred when his large gloved hand touched your knee gently “Miss, wake up please” Now you could see his face, stern but handsome. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry” you finally came to it, his gaze felt heavy on your skin. Penetrating. You apologized profusely and opened the cab door to exit.

“It’s ok, buenas noches” he said, a faint smile on his lips did not reach his eyes.

You quickly bid him farewell, missing the lovely smell as soon as you exited the cab.

*********

The next time you entered the cab Jake recognized you right away. “Buenos días, bella durmiente” (Good morning, sleeping beauty). He seemed quite pleased to see you.

You recognized him too. He could see you take a deep breath as you sat down, closing your eyes at the beautiful masculine scent. A warmth pooled in your core. Am I getting turned on just by this guy’s smell?

“Buenos dias to you too” you chuckled shyly. Gosh that sounds wrong with my accent.

“Hope you slept well, where can I take you?”

You gave him the address, not saying anything else as you felt yourself actually becoming nervous. He drove silently for a while, but the nervousness continued.

A song Jake loved came on the radio and he began to sing along quietly. Your eyes lifted to him and your ears perked up.

His voice was beautiful and smooth, less deep than you thought it would be, a lovely tenor. You smiled to yourself as he sang, the Spanish flowing from his mouth so effortlessly. You finally worked up the courage to compliment him, but you waited until the song finished. He seemed to be enjoying it too much for you to disturb.

“You have a great voice” You finally said. “Gracias, miss….?” He replied, with a genuine smile this time.

“I’m Y/N…. You also smell really good… I mean your car…CAB. Your cab smells really good”.

You felt yourself blush, cheeks heating up immediately after the words left your mouth. God that was embarrassing.

Jake chuckled “Thanks, sweetheart”

Sweetheart… you couldn’t help but smile to yourself.

He took the opportunity to look at you again for a brief moment, he saw you tucking your hair behind your ear. Light catching on the golden band on your ring finger, face blooming in a shade of pink.

“Im Jake, encantada de conocerte”

“Nice to meet you too…?” You were not sure you understood but you guessed your best. Suddenly eager to learn Spanish.

“Ci, That’s right.”

“Maybe you should teach me some more Spanish, at least while I’m here”

Ok now you're FLIRTING…? You obviously forgot how to..

“Well I charge extra for that. Es muy caro”

He's flirting back..?

“I bet you do. Guess we’ll have to stick to English then”

“Or agree on a payment plan, I can give you a discount” He chuckled.Oh, he IS flirting back.

The tone between you two was playful, laced with just enough suggestion, and you were loving every minute of it. It felt like it’s been forever since you properly flirted with a man, and a warm feeling bloomed in your belly.

When he stopped in front of your office building you were disappointed that you actually had to get off.

He turned back, reaching out a gloved hand.

“Pleasure doing business with you” you said playfully, reaching your hand to him, expecting a handshake.

He took it gently, turned it and placed a peck on the back of your hand.

Heat rose to your face and you giggled.

Well HE obviously didn't forget how to flirt.

When you exited the cab you allowed yourself to smile fully, exhilarated by the exchange between the two of you. Ok calm down. He’s a cab driver, probably flirts all the time with his clients, just some harmless fun. He probably knows that women fall for the sexy Spanish shtick.

You giggled to yourself as you repeated the words “sexy Spanish shtick” out loud. Giddy like a goddamn teenager.

Later you replayed the whole conversation in your head, overthinking as usual, you tried not to let it get out of proportion, it’s just that it’s been so fucking long since you felt noticed and desired, you were ready to cling to any interaction that made you feel like that.

Some low hanging fruit you are.. you told yourself, wondering if you cooperated too quickly, if the whole exchange made you look pathetic.

It was hard to admit to yourself that you needed to be desired by men, other than the one you married. It felt juvenile, greedy even. Even when you did come to terms with it , it was clear to you that it was obviously limited to looks and words, you didn't plan on acting on any of it.

**********

The heatwave was washing over the city, laying thick like a heavy blanket you could not shake off. July was merciless, and the mid- day sun burnt so bright it caused heat to reflect from the scorching pavement.

You’ve spent all morning running errands, and now you were finally done at the market, making your way back to the bus stop. Your work did not cover cab fare on weekends and the bus ride wasn’t too long. The 5 minute walk to the station was, however, much longer than you imagined. With the heavy bags in your hands cutting the circulation to your fingers, your dress sticking to your body, sweat pooling on your back, and the blazing sun above, you felt as if you were about to melt into the sidewalk. You imagined yourself turning into a puddle, and then evaporating quickly under the blazing heat.

BEEP BEEP

The sound jolted you, you looked to your left as the cab window rolled down.

“Need a ride?” Jake smiled

Your core went all jittery at the sound of his voice. You'd clap with excitement like a baby seal if your hands were free…calm your tits.

“Hey Jake! I’m actually walking to the bus stop, it’s just around the corner”

You hoped he would insist.

“Come on, it’s on my way, I’ll drop you off”.

“How do you know it’s on your way? I haven't told you were I was going”

You just couldn’t resist teasing him.

“No seas un sabelotodo. You’re melting, get in” (don't be a smartass)

“If you insist… I AM actually melting”

Jake opened the driver’s door, he walked up to you and grabbed the grocery bags to put them in the back. You were finally able to get a good look at him. He was wearing a white button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up, with a black tie. Hat and gloves still in place, defiant against the scorching heat. You couldn't help yourself from sneaking a good look at his butt. His dark jeans complimented his ample ass and thick thighs.

“Get in the front seat, the AC is much stronger”

You nodded and got in, the heavenly smell filling your lungs again, a bit stronger now that you sat closer to him.

Jake cranked up the AC as you leaned in, lifting your hair up, relishing in the breeze, albeit artificial. Your neck arched back, exposing more skin to the cooling air. You closed your eyes and a satisfied hum left your lips.

Jake was careful not to stare, but he couldn’t help but notice the way your neck was exposed completely, your skin glistening with sweat. Your dress rode up slightly when you sat down, revealing a little more of your thigh.

A few seconds passed before he remembered he actually needed to drive.

“Where to, miss Y/N?” He asked

“Home please, the address is..”

“I remember where that is” “You must have a great memory then, because in this heat I barely remember”

“I try to remember the important stuff”

Jake replied, a small grin adorned his lips and you grinned right back, avoiding his eyes. That would be much too intense and you were already boiling.

When you arrived he parked the cab. "I'll help you carry the bags inside" he said before you had a chance to protest.

"Please you have already done so much, it's really not that heavy" you tried to resist. He waved his gloved hand at your statement and proceeded to take the bags out and carry them towards your door.

As you unlocked the door your heart sank, you weren't sure you wanted him to come inside.

When you both walked in, he placed the bags on the kitchen island and looked around. There was no point in denying the family photos and scattered toys.

"Cute kid, seems happy" he said, picking up one of the framed photos.

"Yeah, he is, thanks" you replied, smiling shyly, not willing to elaborate on the topic.

"I bet you're a good mom" he persisted, still holding your son's picture in his hand. "I love him very much, so I try my best, though nobody's perfect, certainly not me". You replied.

He smiled and put the picture back, perhaps sensing your discomfort.

You never really spoke with him about being a wife and a mother (and you were grateful that both of them weren't home) Although you also never hid the wedding band on your hand.

This was not ok, you knew it.

What the hell is wrong with me?? Inviting a stranger into my house? Happy that my family is not home? Am I demented?

You had to admit it to yourself, this scenario would be 10/10 creepy if Jake wasn't so attractive. He could also be like Ted Bundy, all smiles and charm before he chops me into little pieces.

"Can I offer you something cold to drink?" You attempted to change the subject.

Jake nodded and you promptly handed him a glass of cold water.

He downed it all in one go, as you watched his adam's apple bob on his thick neck while he drank.

He handed you the glass and your fingers brushed against his gloved ones.

"Thank you so much Jake, I really appreciate it, really, you shouldn't have"

"Esta bien, dont worry about it, my pleasure" he smiled.

You walked him back to the front door, feeling awkward and nervous. You weren't sure what to do. Do I shake his hand? Do I peck him on the cheek? Maybe a small polite hug?

You both stopped by the door, facing each other, you finally met his gaze. Beautiful deep brown eyes were looking at you, adorned with long dark lashes. They seemed much softer than you initially thought.

"You have an eyelash on your cheek, may I? " he asked and you could only nod.

Your eyes moved to his hands as he removed his glove, watching with tethered breath as if it was in slow motion. After removing the glove, he very gently brushed your cheek with his thumb. "Now you need to make a wish" he smirked. The air was thick and heavy ,and your heart was thumping in your throat.

Without thinking, you placed your hand on his, and blew on the small lash on his thumb.

As it flew off somewhere you made your wish.

Fuck me. Kiss me.

*******

It was just one of those days. Everything that could go wrong absolutely did. It started with a missed alarm in the morning, continued with a tantrum from your toddler, who was outraged by the fact that the banana you served him for breakfast was indeed shaped like a banana, and not like a pineapple. Following that was an argument with your husband, about the proper way to handle said tantrum.

Your cab driver that morning was insisting on having a political debate which you didn't want to participate in, and to top it off, the traffic was worse than usual.

By the time you arrived at the office you were 35 minutes late, and positively exhausted.

You were sure that with the morning you had, nothing could possibly go wrong at work. You were proven wrong when your boss called you out on a very stupid mistake you made, and scollded you (publicly of course) about your lack of attention to detail. It wasn't like him to do that, but you guessed it fit perfectly with the rest of your miserable day.

After a quiet cry in the bathroom, you were finally able to calm down. You sat on the toilet, wiping your tears away, and the memory of Jake came to your mind. There was something comforting in the thought of him, he was your little secret. He made you feel noticed, seen. It's been almost a week since you last saw him, since the exchange that left you breathless and flustered.

You could admit to yourself that you wanted to see him again, that you liked how absolutely dangerously close you were to making a mistake. All you needed at that point was a tiny push in the wrong direction. Then It made you feel even worse when you considered the implications, playing horrible scenarios in your head about how horrible this could all end for you. Trying to convince yourself that it’s not worth it. The price you’d have to pay would be too high.

Not that anything will actually happen anyway… The thought made you feel both relieved and frustrated. Because damn it, you wanted it to.

When 5 o'clock rolled around you were DONE, completely defeated by the day. You grabbed your stuff as quickly as possible and practically snuck out of the office the moment your boss turned his head.

Jake's cab was waiting under the building. You recognized it immediately. You wondered if he's free, allowing yourself to indulge in the thought of him waiting for you.

For a split second you tried to think of an excuse not to approach him, because getting in the cab with him wasn’t a good idea, on the other hand you were grateful to see a friendly face after the day you just had.

Jake smiled widely when he saw you, signaling you to get in. You got in the seat next to him, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. I will never get over how he smells you thought to yourself as you settled.

“Mi pasajera favorita'' He smiled widely, he seemed to be in a good mood, you smiled back, trying to fend off your lousy one. Although you were sure he’d react politely, you didn’t want to burden him with everything that happened, you didn’t think that cab drivers (or hairdressers, or nail technicians) should be forced to listen to other people's problems while trying to do their job.

He began driving without asking you for an address.

Jake could feel something was not quite right “Que pasa? Everything ok?”

“Just a very lousy day, nothing much really” you replied, hoping he would leave it at that.

“Do we need to go kill someone real quick? I’ll make sure they never find the body” he smirked, trying to lighten your obviously lousy mood. You giggled sadly, as your armor began to crack.

“Nah, I think I’ll let them live, I can’t get messed up in murder, plus orange looks terrible on me”

“Can't imagine anything looking terrible on you” he replied, serious all of a sudden. Your forced laugh tried to break the awkwardness.

“Seriously, you can tell me querida"

You loved his terms of endearment, especially the Spanish ones.

“It really was just a crappy day. Lots of small things that went wrong, but I’m glad to see you. I needed a friendly face after all that shit” you ended the sentence with a bite of bitterness to your voice, fighting back tears that began to sting the corners of your eyes.

It felt so stupid to cry, for a second time that day, and in front of Jake.

“Hey..hey querida.. No, don't cry…” He said softly, which had the exact opposite effect as more tears rolled down your face. It was as if he broke the dam, finally giving you permission to let your guard down.

He pulled over, it was only about half a mile before reaching your house, but he couldn't bear to see you like that.

“I’m so sorry, this is so embarrassing, oh my god, shit…” you spoke through your tears, sniffling, desperately trying to stop them.

He unbuckled his seat belt and turned to you, placing his large hand on your shoulder, rubbing his thumb in soothing circles. It was heavy and warm and made you want to pull closer to him.

“It’s gonna be ok mami, it’s just a bad day, you're gonna be fine…”

You unbuckled and turned to him as well, the sobbing subsided, giving way to the nervousness that buzzed through you. Some tears were still escaping your eyes, he gently brushed them away with his hand and you leaned into his touch.

Your heart was beating mercilessly, belly in knots. You just sat there for a few moments, allowing his touch to both soothe and excite you. There was a lump in your throat and a pool of heat between your thighs. You knew he should stop but desperately wanted him to continue.

“Do you want me to kiss it better…hmmm?” he asked almost in a whisper, making your heart flutter even more violently.

You did not respond, any response would result in a lose-lose situation. You didn’t want to admit how much you wanted this, you also didn't want to say no. You knew this was the dreaded push in the wrong direction, and you were paralized with fear, drawing only shallow breaths.

His gloved thumb grazed over your cheek and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, making goosebumps run down your spine.

He leaned forward slowly placing a soft kiss on your cheekbone,

and then another one on your cheek,

and another one tethering on the edge of your lips.

The fourth kiss reached your lips, soft and delicate, stained with your tears.

Your core heated up immediately, you couldn't help but lean into the kiss, pressing your lips onto his. His hand was gently cupping your face as your lips brushed softly against each other. It was a chaste, delicate kiss. His smell was making you dizzy, the masculine musk in it somehow amplified.

You felt yourself physically torn, lust and guilt mixing inside of you into a nauseating concoction.

"Stop please, I can't" you came to your senses briefly, laying your palm on Jake's chest.

"Lo siento" Jake replied softly, eyes still closed. You were still inches apart, you could still feel his breath on you, his hand still cupping your cheek.

It took you all of five seconds before you were falling off the edge, pressing your lips on his again, admitting defeat, brushing his bottom lip with your tongue. That little flick of your tongue was all it took. Jake's hand moved to your neck, cupping your face between his thumb and index, his tongue licking into your mouth, his lips hot against yours, it was intense and possessive and conveyed nothing but desire and danger. He groaned softly against your lips as he claimed your mouth with his, you were barely able to catch a breath, heart slamming in your chest, mouth gasping for air but not able to break away from his kiss. He was kissing you like he wanted to have as much of you as possible while he still could.

Jake felt the pulse in your throat in his palm, galloping at a merciless pace. He fantasized about this for weeks, and now that he finally gave in, he was afraid he would devour you without being able to stop himself.

A very loud car honk jolted you both as your mouths finally detached. You were almost thankful that you were startled enough to stop, to replace the hunger in your veins with a stress response. You scrambled to collect your bag and quickly exited the cab, saying absolutely nothing, shocked at your own actions and at how far you've allowed yourself to go.

Jake stepped out of the cab after you, calling at you “Y/N I’m sorry! Please let me take you home! Lo siento mucho!”

You were almost running away at this point, and he did not want to cause you any more stress by following you. It was clear that a line had been crossed.

“Jake please go, I’ll walk home, please just go now…please” You shouted back with a shaky voice.

******

Your husband was a grateful man, he didn't know what happened, what prompted you to jump his bones the moment you put your son down for the night. It wasn’t like you to do that sort of thing, but he knew he would be stupid to complain.

You sucked him off like a starved woman before straddling his hips and riding him, your eyes shot with concentration, kisses hot and needy.

All you could think about was Jake, hoping to miraculously conjure him into existence, but it all tasted and smelled wrong.

You finally were able to cum with the thought of Jake fucking into you, mumbling soft praises in Spanish. How sweet his moans would sound, how sexy he would look with sweat glistening on his pecks.

FUCK you were screwed. You only had a small taste and it got you fucking hooked, nothing tasted like he did. You absolutely didn't want to want him as much as you did.

******

The pain in your chest took weeks to subside, but you could still feel the slight sting of it. Finally feeling less and less guilty, although you couldn’t really quit Jake. You would bring him up from your memory every day, like an imaginary friend. Faithfull only in the technical sense, you convinced yourself that it’s good enough, that maybe that earth shattering soul crushing kiss you shared was just what you needed, that you stopped just in time before it all went too far. Truthfully you could only thank that honking car, it was the true ‘hero’ of the story, the thing that actually made you stop.

You knew without a shadow of a doubt that another test would be impossible to withstand. Thank god you weren’t tested.

Until you were.

******

The evening was winding down, you had such a great time with your friends from work, better than you thought you would, you were in a cheerful mood for a change. It was a welcome break after weeks of nothing but work-home-childcare-bed, you finally had the evening to yourself. After three drinks it was clear you needed to call a cab. It would be a long ride, since you were not in your usual part of town. You decided to get yourself some water for the ride, to try and sober up a bit.

Walking into the bright convenience store made your eyes squint. The store was almost empty and quite large, allowing you to wonder quietly, contemplating the snack options that looked very appetizing in your drunken state. All of a sudden you felt a tingle at the back of your head, as if you were being watched. When you turned swiftly there was no one there. As you kept walking the feeling increased, you could almost feel the breath of someone down your neck, but the store seemed completely empty. The alcohol in your blood evaporated instantly and you felt completely sober, as the paranoia slowly set in.

You quickly grabbed a bottle of water and sprinted to the register. That was when you saw him. In the monitor above the clerk’s head, there was no mistaking that strong silhouette, but the cap was really the dead giveaway. He was standing behind the row of shelves, just out of your sight. What the hell?? Your heart rushed. Was it excitement? Fight or flight response? You were not sure. You turned on your heel, walking towards him before he even had the chance to realize what’s going on.

“What the hell do you think you're doing?!” You asked, your voice came out stronger than you anticipated. Perhaps you were still a little tipsy.

“Joder! I’m sorry Y/N”

“Why are you following me? You scared the shit out of me.”

“I..I wanted to come up to you, wasn't sure it’s a good idea, I wanted to apologize, for that time..”

You lifted your eyes to his, dark and hooded, he looked tired. The bright fluorescent lights were probably not doing you any favors either. You wanted to hug him, but of course you did. “Apology accepted,” you muttered quietly.

“Not like this, por favor cariño, can we talk?”

He grabbed your hand in his large gloved one. You looked down and saw your wedding band, pulling it right back. You exhaled sharply “fine Jake, let's talk, not here.”

Maybe closure isn’t such a bad idea, maybe the fact that you feel a little aggravated with him will make this easier.

You walked out of the store, he was a couple steps ahead of you, and if someone had seen you from the side they probably wouldn’t think you were together. You made sure to stay behind him, even walking with him made you nervous, guilty.

The alley was quiet and dark, the street lights illuminating everything in a dim yellow. Jake's face seemed even more angular, eyes shaded completely by his cap, thankfully. You wouldn't have been able to withstand his eyes piercing into yours. You leaned on his parked cab, folding your arms on your chest, while he stood in front of you, keeping a ‘professional’ distance as much as he could.

A heavy silence stood between the two of you, but your body reacted to the sight and smell of him. You were trying to ignore the need to pull him closer.

“Y/N, I'm very sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you, it was weak of me. I shouldn’t have done what I did"

You looked at him but did not respond, letting the obvious set before you could reply.

“It wasn’t just your fault, Jake"

"Por favor Y/N, let me finish" His breathing seemed heavier, but he sounded almost authoritative.

"I…I was selfish. I knew it was wrong, I should have stopped myself, I just wanted to make you feel better, soy un idiota.."

The words you really wanted to reply sat on your tongue. Admit it already. Say it.

"Jake,I wanted it to happen. I kissed you back, 'soy un idiota' too.."

"Soy UNA idiota..female tense" he chuckled as he corrected you.

"Thank you for teaching me the proper way to call myself an idiot"

"Anytime, querida"

His voice softened.

"I love it when you call me that.."

You raised your eyes to meet his, as he took a step to close the gap between you, looking at you with an intensity and hunger, making your heart race.

“I was also weak” you whispered now that he was close, holding your hands in his.

“You make me weak Jake” Your anger has all but dissolved, and you were standing in front of him defenseless, unarmed. There was nothing that could protect you now.

He removed his gloves one by one, placing them on the roof of the cab behind you. His cap followed, revealing a mop of thick black curls, brushing them back with his hand as a few stray ones still bounced back onto his forehead.

You cupped his face, his stubble softly scratching the palm of your hand.

“Kiss me” you finally said it.

One of his arms rested on the cab, cornering you in, your bodies almost touching now, his scent clouding every remaining ounce of judgment you still possessed.

You could feel his heavy breath as he slowly ghosted his fingers on your jawline and neck and leaned in to kiss you.

He set a slow pace, but his kiss was anything but chaste this time. Dipping his tongue into your mouth, gently sucking on your bottom lip, his lips were soft and pillowy and he brushed them masterfully against your own, before breaking off the kiss to swipe his thumb on your lips. Your tongue darted out to lick the tip of his finger as if by itself, Jake's eyes flickered and he slowly pushed it into your mouth, with a quiet moan. Your tongue swirled around the thick digit, teeth scraped it, before he pulled it out only to kiss you again, deeper and more desperate.

His hand laced through your hair, pulling gently and exposing your neck. Jake's lips trailed sloppy open mouthed kisses from the back of your ear and all the way down to your clavicle. His hips were brushing his hard length against your belly. The combination was making your head spin, and your heat pool in your center. Your moans and whimpers were music to his ears. "You sound so pretty like this querida, making those sweet noises" he said with a raspy voice, teeth nibbling at your earlobe. His palm glided down to your breast, he brushed his fingers on it so tenderly that you barely noticed it until a wave of arousal shot into your core. His weight was pinning you to the car, he slid his thigh between your legs, feeling your heat, grinding his clothed cock it into you. Your fingers squeezed under the waistband of his jeans, tugging at the belt, grabbing at as much ass as you could, pulling him closer. You began to pull his shirt out, hands sliding up his warm firm back, he shivered slightly at your cold fingers and chuckled at your eagerness.

“Can I touch you? Do you want me to touch you, cariño?” he cooed sweetly.

"Fuck..ah..hhm" was all you managed to reply, it felt as if your wetness would drown you, your whole body felt liquid in his arms, reduced to a puddle of lust.

He slid his hand under the hem of your skirt, warm callused palm traveling up your thigh. His lips detached from you, he was breathing heavily and studying you closely. Sliding his fingers gently over your drenched panties as your face contorted with pleasure, until your hips started to buck at him. "Please touch me" you managed to breathe out. He obliged, moving your panties out of the way and gliding both fingers in between your folds.

His breath got even heavier as yours nearly stopped completely. "joder mami.." he muttered at the warm wetness coating his fingers. He circled your clit and then slid back towards your entrance, pushing slightly into you, repeating the motion with a featherlight touch. Your moans were getting quiet, reduced to quick sharp breaths and little whimpers. Brows pinched and eyes slammed shut. It was pure ecstasy delivered in the softest and tenderest of manners. "Breathe mami… I'll take care of you. You are so beautiful like this" he whispered and kissed you again, wanting to capture your pleasure with his mouth.

This is what you wanted all along, to have no choice in the matter. To be seduced so completely that your ability to resist would disappear altogether. This must absolve you of some responsibility.

The rolling thunder did not seem to distract you from each other, no honking car, no impending doom would make your mouths detach. You have allowed yourself to indulge in this, moral compass tossed into the nearest bin.

His thick fingers slid inside of you, and every time he pulled them out just to push them back in, his palm rubbed gently against your clit, covering his hand with your arousal. You moaned into Jake's mouth, louder this time, as you felt the coil tighten in your core.

"Tell me hermosa.." he rasped between soft kisses and licks,"Do you think of me when you touch yourself?"

"Hhm, yes.." you replied, stating the obvious.

"And do you think of me when you fuck your husband..?" Your heart raced at the question, it shouldn't have turned you on even more, make you even wetter, but it did. "Be honest, querida, it's ok" his voice was supposed to feel reassuring, but it was laced with coercion, luring and tempting your shameful truth out of you.

"Yes" you whispered, your voice barely came out as a pathetic whimper.

“Mmmm” He purred at your response.

The thunder roared again, and little droplets of rain began falling.

"We're not getting in until you cum, cariño" He said playfully. You hated the rain, you hated yourself, but you would hate it more if he'd stopped.

Your senses lit on fire as the pleasure in your belly was tightening. You felt the drops cold against your hot skin, the weight of Jake's body on yours, the gentle slide of his fingers, heard the sound of your kisses, moans, and heavy breaths, his smell and taste were intoxicating you.

It all accumulated, building up higher and higher, until you finally felt your pleasure spill over the edge. Wave after wave washed over you. You dug your nails into his shoulders, holding on for dear life, groaning into the crook of his neck. "así, mami, así" he said softly as you clenched around his fingers, pulling you gently down from your high.

You both stood there for a moment, eyes shut, breathing each other's air heavily.

The rain intensified, beginning to soak into your hair and clothes, convincing you both to finally get into the cab.

When you got in, the sounds of the street and the rain dissipated, it was so quiet all of a sudden, all you could hear was each other's breath. Your orgazm was still buzzing faintly through your body, but the guilt was slowly creeping up your back.

You found yourself scrambling for something that would make you stop, but came up with nothing. What would be worse? Betraying the trust of your husband or denying yourself the thing you have been desperately craving for months with every fiber of your being? How strong did you have to be to resist this?

Jake sat next to you, damp curls and white shirt slightly soaked by the rain.

He turned to you and placed his hand in the space between the two of you on the car seat, as if asking for permission all over again "Hermosa, are you sure? I will understand if you want to stop".

Without his cap and with the soft look in his eyes he looked boyish, almost innocent. "You are so handsome" You said, as you brushed away a stray curl from his forehead and laid your hand on top of his, granting said permission silently, still not willing to fully admit to yourself what it is that you're agreeing to. "Please querida, I need to hear that you want this too"

You scooted closer to him, slowly running your hands up his arms and shoulders and began removing his tie. Unwrapping your forbidden present to yourself. "I do. I'm sure. I want this. too much" you said, in a voice closer to a whisper, still trying to keep your 'secret' from him, as if there were any left.

You unbuttoned his shirt, taking your time with each button, until you were able to slide it down his shoulders, the tanned broad panels of his pecs finally at your fingertips. He was beautiful, the contour of him gently illuminated from the dim street lights.

You ran your fingers through his soft curls, pulling him closer for a kiss, your tongues swirled together at a leisurely pace. His hands slid up your legs, under your skirt, pulling your thong down. "Eres tan suave, tan dulce, necesito sentirte cerca.." he rasped as his fingers brushed on your thighs.

"You'll have to translate this one for me" you replied gingerly.

He took your hand, laying it on his clothed cock, painfully hard under his jeans. "Here's a translation for you, querida" he chuckled, groaning softly at the friction. Oh god, of course he's big.

"Aww, is that what it's called in Spanish..?" you chuckled back, rubbing him softly through the fabric.

You made quick work of his belt buckle, unzipping his constricting denim, tugging it along with his briefs down his strong thighs as he lifted his hips slightly.

You finally straddled him, your heat pooling in your core, begging to be filled.

His gaze was fixed on your face as he ran the tip of his cock in between your folds. You bucked your hips at the delicious feeling and began to sink on him slowly, relishing every thick inch, every ridge and vein. "Ah.. fuck, you're a big boy" you managed a breathy whisper. Jake almost whimpered as your warm wetness covered him, sinking all the way into you.

He grabbed your hips, impatient and needy, beginning to slowly grind you on his cock.

It felt amazing. That's the only way you would describe the exquisite fullness between your thighs, his thickness dragging against your walls, gently enticing every ounce of pleasure out of you. You raised yourself slowly, just to sink back again, and again, quickening your pace slightly with every thrust. He nuzzled at your breasts, sucking gently on the flesh he could reach, before grabbing the hem of your top and pulling it up. Your bra quickly followed. Jake latched his mouth on your nipple immediately, sucking hungrily, then pressing your breasts together and lapping his greedy tongue over both nipples. There was pure concentration in his face. His eyes were closed, soft long lashes laying on his sharp cheekbones.

For years you'd retreat to the back of your mind, pull fantasies and memories almost forcefully, that's the only way you could enjoy sex. Now you could barely blink at the sight of him. Broad shoulders and strong arms, sharp jaw, black curls. Just so fucking gorgeous.

Jake sensed your gaze and opened his eyes, staring deeply back while he moved into you. Your orgazm began to approach rapidly, as you tightened around his cock. He planted his feet on the floor, thrusting harder, deeper. He spread your cheeks with his palms, slotting himself deeper still. His eyes darted from your eyes to your lips, to your breasts, before he pulled you into another kiss. You could almost taste your orgazm now, and you began moving faster, chasing it, you closed your eyes out of habit, before forcing yourself to keep them open. You needed to etch as much as you could into your brain. You wanted to capture it all - the sound of his groans, the skin slapping on skin, the smell of sex, the taste of him in your mouth. Every. Tiny. Fucking. Detail. Oh. My. God. Yes! Yesss! Fuck me! Fuck! Fuck! The coil in your core finally snapped, stronger this time, hitting you harder. Jake felt you clench around him and he deepened his thrusts, crashing his hips into yours as you moaned and wailed. No secrets to hide, no shame, you've allowed yourself to fully let go, confessing all of your sins loudly and without reprehension. Warmth spread all over your body, flooding your limbs, as the aftershocks of your climax kept coming. "That sounded so fucking beautiful, querida" Jake groaned. Your hands came up to his face, lacing through his hair, as you began kissing him again softly - on his lips, his cheeks, his forehead…You placed gentle kisses on his closed eyes, every soft kiss thanking him for the pleasure he brought you. Jake's pace began to quicken again, you matched his movements, you could feel him approaching his high, hands gripping your hips with surprising strength, moving you on his cock faster, harder, thrust after thrust after thrust. He groaned as he spilled inside you, neck stretching back, jaw clenched ,sweat beading on his chest. He was every bit as stunning as you imagined him to be.

He collapsed into your chest, heaving from his exertion, thrusting his hips slightly into you, coaxing some final pleasurable little waves of post orgazm out of you.

He looked blissed out, completely content.

You stroked him, gently grazing your nails on his scalp, brushing your fingers on his temple. He purred softly and nuzzled deeper into you. You both knew you had very few last moments to enjoy this, to breathe each other's scent and bask in the tender intimacy of it all, before you'd have to go back to pretending this never even happened. "Thank you" you whispered, kissing the top of his head. You really didn't know what else to say, how to express the mixture of gratitude and guilt you were feeling. Could you promise yourself this was the one and only time? Could you resist him? This? You couldn't tell yourself this was 'nothing' because it didn't feel like 'nothing'. Maybe with time you could convince yourself it was.

"I have to get back home, Jake" you finally said. "I know querida, i know you do."

******

The tension had been building inside of you the whole ride home, and you went back and forth between the possibility that you'll be able to come out of this unscaved and the very plausable outcome of completely ruining your life.

You unlocked the door to your house with a heavy heart, dreading what awaited you on the other side. How would you explain the late hour you came in? Would Jake's scent linger enough to be noticable?

And what if you don't get caught, would you regret this? Surely you'd regret breaking their hearts, betraying their trust, being so selfish with your 'needs' that you didn't even consider another solution. But, would you also regret the scorching hot, charming, gorgeous man that fucked you like that, like you needed him to? And if you regret only some of it, does it count as actual regret? Does it matter?

Your brain was running a mile a minute, perhaps trying to prepare yourself to 'face the music' if you must. The bottom line was that the deed was done. And it was lustful and passionate and every bit as satisfying as you've imagined.

As soon as you stepped in you knew you could breathe a sigh of relief. The glow of the TV was the only thing illuminating the space, and your husband's snores assured you that you were in the clear.

You headed into the shower immediately, relishing in the hot water on your skin. For the first time in months your mind was clear. You could think about your plans for the upcoming days, your chores, missing items on the shopping list, the kind of cake you wanted to bake for your mom's birthday… The lustful beast in you was full, satiated, resting in it's cave at the back of your mind.

Thank you Jake.

**********

Jake

The streets were almost empty, the rain subsided into a drizzle, the wet asphalt shimmered with blurry reflections of the street lights and passing cars.

Jake opened the window and lit up a smoke, he enjoyed the cool air that smelled like rain, it blended with your smell on his fingers.

"Do you think of me when you fuck your husband?" He'd ask them.

Most froze, some tried to avoid the question, some would say "no, because I don't fuck him anymore". Hearing an honest answer like yours was rare. Your precious little "yes"... your voice barely whispered it, but it was enough for Jake.

You were special. Something about the guilt written on your face made it more exhilarating for him. You never did manage to hide anything, every emotion was visible, clear for him to see. Your reaction to his smell, to his voice, your clumsy and adorable attempts at flirting, it was all so endearing. You were always so sweet, so responsive when he finally touched you the way he wanted to.

He'd tell himself that he is actually helping. Every woman wants to feel seen and desired, every woman deserves pleasure. He was just happy to oblige, to offer himself up. He did have a type though, and they all had one thing in common - a husband. Some husbands were doing a fine job, but some were not. Dormant in their lives, maybe cheating, maybe just tired.

He would never insist if he saw that the other side simply wasn't interested, but more often than not they were. And there was nothing quite like breaking through the initial apprehension, to reach the bleeding core of someone who needed this just as badly as he did. And boy did you need it. You were starved and he had the pleasure of feeding you.

He apologized for his advances because he knew that you needed to think that he was as conflicted as you were. But he wasn't, he wasn't sorry either.

How could he be when you moaned like that, clenching on his cock, digging your nails into his skin..?

Fin.

#jake lockley #jake lockley x reader #jake lockley x you #jake lockley x fem!reader #oscar isaac #moonknight

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