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lilgynt · 1 year

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if my mom puts my dad in a home im gonna have a break down the likes of which no one has seen before

#personal #bc i’ve fucked with my broken foot severely relapsed in my ed and have a slipped disk #just to physically show for this shit show #don’t even wanna get into mentally what’s gone down hill or how all my familial relationships fall apart with this #i’ve ruined my life just to put him a home anyway?#all of this for what?#maybe he does get better maybe it all works out but right now it’s my weekend and i’ve spent 2/3 days only doing stuff for my dad #i just need to sleep and clean #in my room #i just need to sleep and clean that’s all i want to do on my weekends #and watch the hannibal movies like i’ve been trying for WEEKS #they all keep fuckin getting interrupted #i just want time off from my job #it’s stressful 4 10s with only a 15 and a 30 for the whole day #i just want time off #edit re reading it seems like i don’t want my dad in a home #i do and don’t. but anyway if it does happen i’m gonna go insane for a bit #like any decision or outcome im going insane for a little bit

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vurelly · 23 days

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Are you listening, God? It's me, the monster you created.

#cotl #cult of the lamb #cotl lamb #cotl narinder #narilamb #cotl narilamb #my art #i need them to make out but they both need to just be covered in blood #im going sleep now i love posting art i will never clean up and fully render <3 #this has been a delightful evening of soul cleansing

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uncharted-constellations · 5 months

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I’ve started a new job and still gotta get used to the flow so for now have a peter dooble

#art #my art #peter parker #spider-man #sketch #sketches #marvel #cleaned it up a little bit just cuz it was on a page with some wonkier doodles #ive almost completely flip flopped my sleep schedule and have not yet fully adjusted #but i will get there eventually #but i needed a post for the month and i dont think ill have time next week so for now here ya go #spider-sense being vaguely halo-esque? its more likely than you think

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mattodore · 3 months

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playing with dionte's hair bc i'm procrastinating

#river dipping #dionte duval #lykos #ts4 #i do really love how dionte and nicholas kinda have a b4b (bald for bald) thing going on.... but that first hair........#he looks so good... the urge to keep it is gonna make me develop a twitch under my eye...#i love the shadows the locs add btw like i personally loveee when hair creators add shading #like the DRAMAAA it adds!!!#also don't look too closely at him here bc i actually haven't updated him yet hence no proper edit of him (tho i probably won't change much #i'm really just supposed to be cleaning out the hundreds!! of duplicate households in my library dkhjnkfgh i just. get so distracted #i also have to fix mattodore's households bc i think i accidentally deleted the updated version of them at 20...#like there are multiple other saves?? but they're all with matthias's old chin??? like literally WHERE did the updated version go #so i need to clean out my library from the top down and fix their sims #i really messed my sleep schedule up the day before yesterday when i was working on those edits of delphi btw #but i did enjoy rewatching secretary and watching charade while staying up all night to do them <3 #also listened to the first two chapters of freedom is a constant struggle! editing may take me forever but i do do other things as i do it #...........talking a lot in these tags bc i'm seriously procrastinating jdkhnf i do NOT ! want to clean through my library it's a mess #OH. ALSO GOOD MORNING I FORGOT TO SAY THAT ‼️#seeing this again two days later and seeing the amount of notes....... y'all weren't meant to reblog this kjhdkfjhndkjgnh #now i'm like damn... is there any reason to make his intro edit like i did for ria and delphi 😭😭😭😭😭

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fisheito · 1 month

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at last....yakumo with CHIKEN

#i have finally achieved Goal. i drew yakumo with a happy chickcen #legitimately there were several moments of me redrawing yakumo's eyes and yelling #nO! THEY'RE NOT UWU ENOUGH (makes the irises bigger) WAIT . TOO UWU (makes irises more oblong)#WAIT!! NOT MONSTROUS ENOUGH (narrows the pupils) SHOULD NOT HAVE MORE EYELINER THAN FOXY GRANDPA (shrinks the lashes)#did u know that chickens like to sleep on tall things? the higher they are the safer they feel? (according to my cursory internet search)#so i imagine when yakumo finally grew taller than the chickens' roosting spots #some of them started just napping on yakumo any time he came to clean the coop #and he'd be so scared of waking them up that he'd try to do his chores in the tiniest movements ever #several hours later grandma checks in on him bc hmmm! he's taking longer than usual!#sees him covered in birds+bird poop and he's aaaallllmost done cleaning with his restrained broom sweeps #(birds don't stop pooping just cuz they're sleeping u see. how productive)#that's a cue for grandparents to move the roosts higher . bc yakumo doesn't have the heart to shoo the birds off him #he needs to get things done! becoming impromptu bird bed for 3 hours a day is not sustainable!#it's all for the good of chiken anyway. happy chicken happy life #yakumo

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nuppu-nuppu · 11 months

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Do you guys have any tips on how to take care of yourself and your environment when you’re kind of at a low point where you have no energy to do anything...pls help

#this is embarrassing #but i have been sleeping on a bed with no sheets for the past month #because I’m just too tired to get clean ones #and it’s super hard to take care of myself #my house is a complete mess #is this neurodivergent culture #neurodivergent #actually neurodiverse #actually autistic #actually neurodivergent #adhd #pls help #I’m so ashamed of myself but i need help so that’s why i am asking #also for moral support

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nox-sssscraps · 4 months

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Gawd I’m. it’s 4:20am and I’ve been listening to exclusively the new 21 savage album since it dropped last night and I’m thinking abt my ocs . And spacewaffles I suppose

#RRRGG I can never get Bacon’s colors right but it’s ok!!!#it’s sooo okay and fine I’m deffo not upset abt it ^_^#lifesteal smp #baconnwaffles0 #planetlord #oc: Corduroy #im so proud of the name Corduroy I really like it . need to flesh out her character more <33 #UGH ok I dislike how Planet’s head/hair looks and Bacon’s hair is too fucking saturated AND you can’t tell that’s it’s braids !!!#Corduroy looks fine. love you Corduroy <333 #according to procreate I spent 2.5 hours on this OHGG MY GOD WHYYY #ok caption true tho new 21 kinda awesome #my favorites so far r see the real and uhh #wait hold on #and just like me . special mention should’ve wore a bonnet . THAT song takes me straight back to middle school and swing screen doors <3333 #AND ICE POPS AND WATER BALLON FIGHTS that we were allowed to start past 7pm cuz parents would make us clean up and we had school #damn. I love music #ok bye I’ve been here for long enough and i probs need to sleep lol #nox art

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teecupangel · 6 months

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I have been thinking what about if Desmond turned into a Pegasus, a Hippogriff or even better a Griffin. I just really like the image of Desmond's ancestors riding into battle or just flat out jumps from Desmond's back mid flight leap of faith style.

To be honest I like Griffin Desmond more. The combination of bird of prey and big feline is just so fitting for the Assassin's Brotherhood. Aerial superiority plus the stealth agility and flexibility of a cat. Plus imagine Altaïr finding cub Desmond during AC1 and thinking he is just a cat sized chubby ball of fluff that can fly and claw at the enemies faces (and also curl up with him at night and purr, Desmond's feathers and fur are very soft). Then fast forward a few years where baby is all grown up, can claw through steel and armor, is bigger than most horses and capable of easily carrying two people comfortably on his back and still have space for a third (that doesn't stop Desmond from sleeping in Altaïr's bed much to Altaïr's delight displeasure).

Also could put some AltMal in there with cub Desmond helping mend their relationship (Kadar is alive because I said so, maybe he saved him at the cave). And bringing those two for a nice flight.

Desmond goes down in Assassin history as a legendary creature whose chosen rider/companion goes on to do great things.

I wrote a pegasus idea but I can’t seemed to find it :(

I think I also wrote Griffin version but I’m soooo unsure so… have this little scene instead? XD

.

It was the sounds of quick feet hastily walking away that alerted him.

Altaïr raised his head and placed the quill back to the small ink bottle next to the journal he had been writing on, the two pages filled with the ongoing designs for Desmond’s armor with notes all over concerning the materials and possible alternatives.

He stood and waited for Malik to open the door to reach the mentor’s office from the second floor of the main keep. Altaïr kept his face blank, observing Malik’s face.

He was frowning with lips set on a grim line.

But his eyes did not bore any darkness nor blaze.

So… annoyed but not murderous or angry.

Altaïr could work with that.

… he just have to find out what he did wrong this time before Malik’s annoyance boiled into anger.

“Malik…” Altaïr greeted cautiously with a nod.

“Follow me.”

With that said, Malik walked out of the office and Altaïr grabbed the journal, not wishing it to be seen by anyone. He kept it open though because of the ink but followed Malik quietly, ignoring the way the other Assassins and scholars rushed (while walking) out of their way.

Malik led him to their private quarters and Altaïr was trying to remember if he had forgotten something.

Did he leave books haphazardly again?

No.

Altaïr was sure all the books had been organized this morning. He hadn’t even touched any of them, having been woken up by Kadar before dawn because of a new merchant who thought he could pull a fast one on Kadar with the absurd prices he had set for supplies.

Well…

Kadar was the reason why he had woken up but it was Kadar’s assistant, a young Assassin who had to leave the field due to a severe injury, that had woke him up and begged him to intervene before Kadar pushed the merchant off the fortress wall and make it look like an accident.

… not that it ever happened before.

Was it because Altaïr left in a hurry with no time to-

No.

Malik wouldn’t be annoyed by something so small.

They entered the room and Malik led him to…

Ah.

“Care you tell me about your bedwarmer when I’m not here?” Malik asked dryly.

To anyone else, they would probably assume Malik thought Altaïr had been spending the night with another behind his back.

But…

Desmond stared at them, wings twitching slightly as he remained curled on the bed, currently in disarray with feathers all over.

One of the pillows (the blue one that no one really uses anyway) had been eviscerated, its guts flowing out from the telltale talon marks.

“I can explain.” Altaïr started.

It was bound to happen.

Malik didn’t know that Desmond would come into their room and sleep with Altaïr whenever he was away.

Altaïr wasn’t even sure if Desmond did it to comfort Altaïr or if he wanted some comfort but it had been a habit they formed since he found Desmond as a cub, so small he could fit in one of Altaïr’s arms effortlessly.

Malik raised an eyebrow as he said, “Alright, I’m listening.”

Desmond slowly got up and tried to make himself look small (a fruitless effort considering his actual size) while crawling towards the now open door.

“Desmond.”

Desmond froze at the sound of Malik’s voice.

“Stay.”

Desmond stared at Altaïr, his big eyes seemingly becoming bigger, glistening with plea.

Altaïr turned his eyes away.

Desmond made an almost clicking sound before walking towards Altaïr, going on his haunches next to him.

“Well…” Malik glared at Altaïr, “Go ahead, Altaïr.”

Altaïr stared at Malik and wondered.

… what the hell was he supposed to explain?

#desmond is a griffin #desmond is like half a pet and half a brother to altaïr #altaïr always cleaned up after desmond sleeps with him #desmond needs altaïr to open the door for him #otherwise he might just ram it #i just realized that if one doesn’t remember desmond is a griffin in this one #this entire idea feels more soap opera drama lol #ask and answer #assassin's creed #desmond miles #altaïr ibn la'ahad #malik al sayf #teecup writes/has a plot #fic idea: assassin's creed #altmal

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sysig · 5 months

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Delusions (Patreon)

"Could I have your hand, sir?" Max didn't move, which Dexter was, sadly, getting used to.

"Sir?" Max jerked, then turned and stared at him, lost and blank. "Your hand, please."

Max's hand lifted shakily, and he laid it gently in Dexter's upturned palm. Dexter gave a quick and quiet "thank you," then turned it over in his own hand, observing him closely.

Too closely - his knuckles were rough and his fingernails were dull and cracked in places. His once-soft, not-a-day-in-his-life-subjected-to-hard-labour hands were now, already, toughened and split and scarred in places, especially the heel of his palm. He turned it over again, this time to stop looking so intensely. He had only wanted to give it a cursory glance to begin with.

"Do you know what I see, sir?" he asked as conversationally as he could manage, running his fingers along Max's abused flesh. He seemed to be at least half paying attention, his eye gazing down between them, and he'd occasionally twitch, encouragingly Dexter thought. He seemed to want to curl around him, then stopped and shook, his hand squeezing into a fist. Dexter coaxed him back out, encouraged him to hold himself lightly.

"What do you see?" He was almost startled by Max actually continuing their conversation, that happened so rarely now, shaking and quiet as it was. He took a deep breath, was he really going to do this?

"I see a hand, with five fingers." Max remained quiet, though his brow curled, and a guarded look came into his eye, though he still wasn't looking at Dexter. He felt a pang of guilt, but he had to try. "What do you see?"

Max's eye unfocused and began to water. He looked up, but not enough to reach Dexter's gaze in return, instead staring through his chest, and he felt just as hollow and empty as he must look to him.

"Do you take me for a fool, DAX?" Quiet and as close to angry as he'd heard since they'd been here.

No, not angry.

Betrayed.

He swallowed down the stinging lump at the back of his throat. He had to put on a brave face, had to keep his composure if he wanted Max to get better. That was the only thing he wanted, more than anything.

"Of course not, sir. Genuinely, what do you see?"

Max pulled his hand away and turned his body, his bandaged side facing Dexter. Shutting him out, pointedly. Dexter's empty hand curled into a fist, he was no better.

"Please, don't..." Max took a shallow, shuddering breath, and several beats before he spoke again, even quieter. "Don't ridicule me." Dexter could hear his breath catch, and he wanted nothing more than for this all to just stop.

"Sir, I didn't-"

"I've had enough of that." He shook his head stiffly, the action strange and wrong, like he had forgotten how. He stilled, his head turned even further away. "More than enough."

#Doodles #SCII #Helix #ZEX #Dexter Favin #And a drabble-fic under the cut #I ended up writing that the night after I read - I was a bit too inspired while busy so it's a little on the unfocused side haha #I would've cleaned it but I worry it wouldn't make it out of that stage! Please enjoy it for now <3 #This set is mostly periphery ideas - inspired by events rather than directly shown ♪ I suppose the first two kinda count tho #But they're more directly of the little scene I wrote ouò Poor ZEX </3 #And Dex! He's usually so capable! But he's stretching himself so thin ahh it's hard to watch in the best way #Of course he doesn't want to give ''Max'' over to just anyone - anyone at all really - both of their trusts have bottomed out #But how much could he reasonably care for him in that state? When he's still being actively haunted and most importantly - Not Max #He needs helps he needs support he needs to sleep and shower but a second with his eyes off Max and - then what? He'll immolate from fear #It's hard to imagine him crying but pushed to this extreme? To the thought of losing Max utterly and completely? Hhhhh #I do also just love him being possessive even outside of how terrible the situation is - he's always had his glimpses but this situation #Brings out the worst in him <3 In terrible ways #Really his method is just setting ''Max'' up nearby and prompting him over the sound of the shower like that's not nerve-wracking at all #Like he already doesn't answer half the time if that #As for the mini fic I was really interested in Dex's line about indulging ''Max's'' delusions #Apart from the fact that they're not delusions - not that anyone believes him outside of the Institute - what it means to indulge is weird #I saw one example of how to handle delusions that stuck with me - how not to deny them outright while also not reinforcing them #Since it's not actually helpful to be told ''That isn't Really happening to you'' when to you - to ZEX - it really is! How invalidating #And so rather to take the approach of ''I don't see/feel/hear what you are - I can't find any evidence of it myself'' and extrapolating #Dex taking the approach of ''What reality are you experiencing right now?'' and trying to build from there!#Unfortunately ZEX has already been treated like....well like all that - he's not in the mood for games even well-intentioned ones #He /knows/ he's in a human body. He can feel that and see that and understands that. It doesn't change who - what he /is/#The idea of a completely broken ZEX is so sad to me :( He's so strong and prideful and vivacious - Max really is another him </3 #It's not the same but he was saved from death! To fall into torture... But even despite that I want to see him succeed! As much as he can #Even in that small and shaking way I want to see him be hateful and spiteful - angry. Powerful <3 Fighting ♥

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protectoratenova07 · 1 year

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I will never not get annoyed over people saying that Brian/Grue joining the Heroes was the obvious and easiest choice out there. Admittedly, the WOGs expand more on it, but even with what we get from Arc 4 when he talks about his trigger event, I can't comprehend how anyone wouldn't see the reasons for him not wanting to join the government sponsored heroes.

Basing this off memory, but to sum it up, Brian goes to him moms house after getting a text from Aisha asking for help. He finds her in some poor condition ( I don't think he goes into detail and it may not matter if he did cause he's not telling the full truth here) and when he tries to take her back to his dad's, their step-dad gets in thew ay and doesn't let them leave. Brian proceeds to beat him up, take his sister back, and gets powers sometime in between.

Then, he, aisha, and their dad go to the police the very next morning. They explain what happened and Brian still describes how he almost got sent to jail. Only aisha backing him up and his step-dad missing an asshole anonymous meeting saved him. And he still got some months of community service. Like, in my opinion he did the right thing every step of the way and still almost got screwed over.

Sometime later, (not immediately cause he's 14 to 15 when he gets powers) he decides to try and take care of aisha by being a villain to get enough money/backing to do it.

That's all described in arc 4. Now we get into the WOGs. Again, basing this off memory, but I can try to find them later.

First, Brian lied about his trigger, a little bit. General event still happened, but when he claimed he didn't know who the man was besides being his mom's new boyfriend, he lied. He knew that man bc it was the same boyfriend who had abused him in the past. And his mom brought him back and let him interact with his sister. Add in his mom's other problems and his dad's ("I wouldn't describe him as abusive") there was a fair bit of emotions Brian was going through that he didn't share. But at the end of the day, every adult in his life failed him and his sister. He wouldn't be willing to extend his trust as easily.

Second, a different WOG described Brian getting into crime in a panic bc aisha had done something afterward that led to her needing to get bailed out of something with money (again, going off memeory) so even if he wanted to join the wards he'd be doing it with a record. Presumably he later decided he might as well go all in on it and get aisha into a safer environment than both his parents. He probably thought it may help with keeping her out of trouble as well if she wasn't around two people who didn't know how to raise kids (not that he did either, but he probably thought he couldn't do worse).

Third, by WOG he did actually consider the wards, but after researching them decided they wouldn't be worth it. Admittedly this was moreso bc of his own hangups with commitment. Bc telling the big organization your power and identity then trying to bail wouldn't really work out, but apparently it was still preferable to a career of crime. It's not like the Protectorate would actually have authority to take a child away from their parents anyway without major proof, especially if that kid isn't a parahuman themself.

Fourth, the undersiders were generally a low risk high reward chance until Taylor joined and brought them her bad luck. They operated for a year and only got into some mild skirmishes with Lung and them being escape artist didn't have an issue with him. Besides that, they made a shot ton of money on top of the 2grand their sponsor gave them.

Fifth, I don't think we ever learned what the time table was for Coil helping out with Brian getting custody, especially given how suspicious Brian was of their mysterious boss and his motives preleviathan. Maybe Coil admitted to knowing Brian's problems and offered a solution at the start. Maybe Brian opened up with it as a condition to him joining. Or maybe after a few months of getting 2grand a relatively easy missions Brian decided to trust the boss who hadn't screwed him and ask for the money to be given to him in a legal paycheck for better chance at custody. I say that last option bc Brian is supposed to be the careful pragmatic one who thinks about his choices and doesn't do the crazy option unless bug girl decides to go full throttle and he begrudgingly goes along. And giving his personal details and a sure fire way of blackmail isn't excalty the pragmatic choice.

Tldr: he has to have some pretty big distrust of authority cause shifty parents and probably shotty police and by WOG became a criminal in a panic before going full in on it. Cause he was, again, like 15 years old.

Now, the argument for him joining the wards is that the Heroes/PRT could have snapped their fingers and given everything Brian would want. And seeing the deal Madcap got I can definitely see the idea behind it, but there are a few problems with that. A) Brian wouldn't know shit about how desperate the Heroes are bc they don't advertise that. B) I'm not sure how much power they would actually have over taking kids away from unhealthy environments cause laws and shit would probably limit that. C) as stated above, he says he almost got jailed for hurting his step-dad so I don't see him liking authority at this stage, no matter how just he was in the eyes of the law for it. D) Brian's own issues and that he's a 15 year old so he won't see the world as a perfectly rational being.

#parahumans #brian laborn #grue #worm #why didnt he get an interlude before his 2nd trigger wildbow #i just hate it when i see stuff like why didnt this emotionally ruined teenager act perfect and logical #i wrote this while needing sleep so sorry for typos #also thats not even getting into the 2 decade long nazi problem in the city he lives in #or how the the protectorate probaly just got their asses kicked by lung cause it would be around this time he made the abb #so the heroes arent looking good is what im saying #long post #meta #i guess? not sure #ill find the wog later im going to bed #maybe clean tbis up into an actual formated post as well

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inkybinkyboink · 2 months

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urinetown headcanons (under the cut) while i wait for my headphones to charge >:)

there are. so many.

hope is a total plant mom

her place is like. decked OUT in plants. they are her pride and joy

just like. assume that they all have water. for now.

bobby does not get it. at all. but he's so supportive

bobby and hope get a puppy together and the puppy is scared of loud noises but so is bobby so when hope vacuums they hide in the broom closet together

officer lockstock watches drag race like an olympic sport. it's his version of like a laker's game or a yankees game or whatever

avid bianca del rio stan and i will die on that hill

no sorry i just gotta take a second to like.

lockstock 100% lives in like. your grandparents house. it's decorated the same way. blankets over chairs and couches, plants, LOTS of books, antiques, that sort of thing. vintage but like. humble?

officer barrel collects coins

you're gonna look at this man and tell me he doesnt collect coins?

you're lying

ms. pennywise is a tea fanatic

lesbian hot blades harry

little sally's favorite movie is Coraline

and she definitely takes apart toys and puts them back together to make little frankensteinian creatures like sid in toy story

lockstock would make a hella cool university english professor

tiny tom believes that the moon landing was faked

hope sews

ms pennywise's favorite book is definitely like wuthering heights or something

personally. i think. as someone who's played barrel. that were he given the opportunity to come to terms with his own identity, he would go and sincerely apologize to everyone he's hurt over the years.

like he probably wouldn't be forgiven, and i don't know if he deserves to be, but i think he would at least recognize the severity of his actions

lockstock taught little sally how to roller skate

little sally has an ant farm kit

caldwell b. cladwell has an eerie amount of world war 1 and 2 books.

mcqueen and millenium marathon euphoria together

fipp collects rocks and minerals

barrel lowkey knows how to cook a good ass meal

little becky two shoes is the type of person who you run into leaning against a wall smoking a cigarette while it's pouring rain and if you talk to her you're getting unskippable lore

kinda like your wine aunt but on drugs

little sally made lockstock a friendship bracelet once

idk i kinda feel like lockstock had a kid once and then they like. passed away or something. i just feel like lockstock has a tragic backstory but i dont know what it is

ma strong gets migraines and it got passed down to bobby

*chants* sick fics sick fics sick fics

ok i have a theory that the amenity numbers correspond with street numbers. so it's called amenity number nine because it's on ninth avenue. that way the numbers also still correspond to the quality of the toilets.

so the cops would have jurisdiction based on where the amenities are. that way it makes sense that they're the only two cops, because they only have jurisdiction in that particular area.

ok im done :)

#urinetown #k literally. i have upstairs neighbours and they are. so loud. all of the time. and me and my roommates have done everything we can to get #them to quiet down and they literally wont like its fucking sadistic man #anyways #my point is #i had earplugs and headphones on last night so i could sleep #and then my headphones died bc i had them on all night #and i realized that i left the charging cable at home which is like an hour drive away so i cant just go get it #and i need to clean my place and i cant do that without my headphones #so i had to go get a mfing charger from the store #and THATS why i had to wait for my headphones to charge :)

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nuclearanomaly · 4 months

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Granite in my chest--

#bloodborne #gareth #trying to embrace whatever this render style is a bit more bc it's very freeing #no cleaning. no lines.#as soon as my instinct is to 'do a new sketch layer' I start colouring instead #it might mean some parts are ??? but it's about telling myself the shapes and stuff are still there to sell whatever it is #ie the clasp on his robe lmao #2 versions because I like the clean one lots but what's a bloodborne picture without slapping some blood all over #GARTEH MY SON blows dust off him hi hello #why him? idk he was in my head #and all the sleep token I'm listening to... the album art makes me think about bloodborne #and additionally I know I need to practice more and not just draw Nini again... (takes physic damage)#me before 2024 has even started: I'm gonna try hard to do better with art in 2024 #I will probably fail this idea but hey another year another promise to try and improve maybe this time I will #art: mine #tw: blood

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tblsomedoodles · 9 months

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A SHITTY SETUP WILL NOT STOP ME!

have some Apocalypse Don being soft with his little daughter (with a bonus teen clara doodle.)

i'm on a trip yet all i've been wanting to do is draw this girl and her dad! I was literally drawing at a resturant instead of interacting properly. i just...needed to see these two.