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mondstaub1 · 1 year

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Modern/ABO Lucemond fanfiction

- When Viserys died he left everything to his daughter, brother and grandkids (Rhaenyras kids of corse) several houses and mansions around the world, his company, his money, stocks .... all in all several millions $

- So Alicent and her kids were left with nothing and in a terrible finacel situation since:

- Aegon (beta) was a highschool dropout with a alcohol and gambeling problem

- Alicent (omega) never worked before (she was a gold digger, or used as one, that is up for discussion)

- Daeron was in middle school (alpha)

- Helaena (beta) had graduated from highschool but had problems with autism (everyone else had problems she is just so sweet, not her fault her family can't see that) so she was working part time with kids

- Aemond (omega) was about to finsh highschool and since he could not bare to leave his family could not go to collage

- Otto is dead (we are all so sad) (Daemon problably threw a party)

- So they moved into a small aparment and tried to find work with was difficult for several reasons, mostly their lack of experience, Aegons drinking problem and the fact that most people were freaked out by Aemonds eyepatch

- All of them got paid the bare minimum wgrn the had jobs and whenever they had a bite saved up Aegon would spend it on himself

- So in his desperation Aemond used his status as an Omega and got a job as a dancer at a stripp club (Alicent nearly fainted)

- He danced behind a one way mirror so he never saw who he danced for and who it was his was undressing himself for (no touching ever)

- Aemond also took hormons to make his chest and ass grow (he hated the way it made him feel and look but he needed the money)

- Meanwhile Rhaenyra, Daemond and their family ran the buisness and slowly everyone grew up - Jace (beta) studied business to one day take over the company

- Luke after turning out to be an alpha to everyones suprise went to Driftmark to study merean biology and he learnt how to sail from his grandfather

- Joffrey beta got into highschool and played sports (he already had offers from collages for a full scolorship -

- Aegon and Viserys got into a privat school which they enjoyed and Visenya enjoyed her life as Rhaenyras youngest and daddys little girls with lots of sibling so spoil her (not presented)

- Baela (alpha) became an aphlate and Rhaena (omega) studied language and traveled

- After Luke graduated and passed his sailer purment Jace and some of Lukes friend dragged him to a stripped club (guess with one)

- They insisted Luke should have some fun and hired a stripper for a privat dance, they heard of a stripper nicknamed ,,The pirat" and thought it would be perfect to celebrat Luke offically becoming a sailer.

- Luke blushed but let himself be talked into it and the moment he saw the half naked omega through the one way mirror he felt his jaw drop, because in front of him dancinging in the most suductive poses was his oncle whom he had not seen since he was 14

- Aemond had chanced, he used to be so scary and intimidating and now he was dancing around a pole in a string tanger and a BH that seemed so small, well that did not matter when he took it of.

- Luke knew he sould look away but he couldn't and he didn't want to.

- The last time they talked Aemond told him he was a dirty bastard and his mother a whore, so this felt like sweet karma and honestly Aemond was hot

- So Luke sat there hard and with a shit eating grin, watching his uncle dance

- Once it was over Luke claped an said "Wow uncle, it's so nice to see you again. Even if I honestly didn't expect to see so much"

- Aemond went first pale and then red before he grabbed his underwear and ran away mortified

- Luke couldn't help but chuckel before going back to his brother and friends, but he decided not to tell anyone about Aemond.

- Aemonds heart nearly stopped when he heard the voice of his nephew, it had been years since the had seen each other but somehow he know instandly that it was Lucerys. Blood shot into his face once he became aware of the state he was in and so he flet, like the coward he once acussed Luke of being.

- His face burned, his intire body burned with shame, how was Luke even hear? This had to be a nightmare. But it wasn't and he knew it.

- At the end of the shift one of his coworkers aproched him and handed him money, saying it was a tip from one of his clients. Aemond knew immediatly from whom it was.

-He wanted to throw it away but he was not in a situation in with he could turn down money, so he took the 200$, feeling dirtier then ever before.

- The next day at breakfeast his mother anounced that they would meet with Rhaenrya at their old home, to celebrate Lukes graduation.

-Aemond wanted to die, he didn't want to face Lucerys, he didn't know it he could but it seems like he had no choice.

- On the other end of town Luke was grinning after this mother told him his aunte and uncle would attend the party thown in his honor. He could no wait to see Aemond again.

#aemond x lucerys #hotd #lucemond #mortification #pole dancer Aemond #sailer Lucerys #modern au #a/b/o fanfic #rich Lucerys

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dramaphan · 3 years

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Fuck it I’m just gonna live react in bullet points until I get bored

•I know I’ve already read the intro but I’m reading it for real this time and it. It do be sounding like a vegan cyclists Instagram caption here and there. I keep waiting for him to tell me that despite all these bad things he’s talking about, he learned how to eat fruit and now he feels better. I gotta remember which oh my god as I was typing this I got an Adrian notification how did he know

•(absolutely horrifying please don’t search) Dan I guarantee the only people reading this book have already seen hello internet shut up

• “the pressure it put on my personal life was too big to handle” should I start an ‘I wish he would elaborate on that’ counter? Fuck it. 1

•I don’t know why I had convinced myself that this mf started therapy in like 2014 because it’s seeming like that didn’t happen until post tatinof. Interesting

•man does anyone remember that old picture that used to circulate with photos of like 20 youtubers and they all had a label like “bullied in school” or “abused as a child” or “eating disorder” and the whole point was to say “hey your faves are people who have been through some shit” but then you get to Dan’s and his was just “college dropout” as if that was the biggest issue he’d ever had. If only we’d known, eh

•man I really get some sort of icky feeling at that last line in the intro. “If laughing at my pain can make it easier for you, I’m happy to. I’m used to it” like I don’t know why that’s bothering me so much but I’m bothered.

• “I’m not an expert. I’m just a guy with a laptop and a story” yeah we know that’s why we’ve been giving you so much shit about making a book instead of a video 💀

• “it’s up to you to take what is contained in this text and apply it to you and your life” absolutely not gonna do that king

• “we can feel depressed or anxious without having serious diagnosable disorders” oh man you mean to tell me that sometimes things that are a symptom of something are also normal behaviours that don’t necessarily mean anything? Wild.

• “mental health problems aren’t some sort of badge of honour and suffering isn’t aspirational” go off king fuck anti recovery bitches

•I’m on page 36 and I’m starting to get bored already I’m really trying to push through this first section come on you can do it

•blah blah eleventh dimension blah blah brain lasers blah blah

•damn he really do mention menopause in this bitch

•”six million years ago when we were stressed apes” is doing something to me this is the first funny thing he’s said

•”primordial fish brain” alright fine he’s funny I guess

•I’m never not going to find it hilarious that he talks about nervous shits in the first few pages that’s genuinely the only thing that I’m ever gonna remember about this book

• “based on what I’ve seen from domesticated cats-“ what is this man even talking about

•there’s a whole chart about physical symptoms and what they mean and the footnotes are killing me this man really put a footnote in his self help book to make a joke that shitting yourself during a fight is a good distraction technique

• “use your brain. Please go see a doctor” okay maybe he does give good advice

•we’re talking about how finding a safe place during a panic attack can actually be bad and I’m feeling very called out. If I want to cry in the linen closet at work for ten minutes whats it to you

•”chaotic and argumentative holiday family dinner” you say? Please elaborate on that: 2

•Jess is going to hell for thinking about tits??? Dan this is a self help book not conversion therapy

•why is Dan making me imagine wasps that look like old people banging

•”if you recognize these symptoms in yourself, please question it” me, after being called out about ten times in one paragraph ❌👄❌

•”I always appreciated someone making a joke in poor taste at my expense” boy Dan you’d love it here at dramaphan dot com 💀

•okay I’m finally at the end of the intro section. Gonna stop for now. Review so far: it’s fine

#ywgttn spoilers

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crackspines · 3 years

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Just for the Night

Tim Drake didn’t think he was a bad kid, but the evidence was mounting. Parents of good children could stand to be in the same room with them without it dissolving into a screaming match about an A- on a spelling test. Parents of good children don’t have to fly around the world for ten months out of the year to get away from their kids, leaving their multi-million dollar company unattended.

And lastly, Tim thought as he dabbed his bloody lip with a square of toilet paper, if he wasn’t a bad kid, then they wouldn’t have to hit him.

So really, a rational mind could only come to one conclusion.

Tim’s eyes watered in the mirror, and he gave up on the lip. It was swelling now and most of the blood was trapped under the skin. Chapped lips and a backhand to the face is a recipe for disaster.

Heading back to his bedroom, he moved quickly and silently, inching the door closed behind him. In the wake of their family fight, the house had gone completely quiet. Even the sound of a nine-year-old’s slippers on hardwood was like a gunshot to Tim’s ears. His nerves felt like live wire, like every little noise and sensation was grating on him with a serrated blade.

After settling in under his comforter, Tim’s eyes didn’t close. His face ached fiercely, making him too uncomfortable for sleep. Even without the pain, his mind kept the events of tonight rolling through his thoughts on repeat.

He could see his mother’s hand swinging for his face. Beside her, his father had pulled off his belt and was brandishing it in the air. Both of their eyes were alive with a hate that Tim could hardly believe was directed at him.

He never thought he’d long for the days when they left him alone for months at a time while traveling. Six months ago, when they told him Drake Industries was in trouble, and they’d have to stay in Gotham semi-permanently, he’d leaped for joy. They finally had the chance to be a loving family living under one roof. It was his fantasy come to life.

And now Tim had to leave.

As quickly as he’d gotten into it, he slid out of bed. His school bag was stuffed with books and a school tablet. He placed it all neatly on his desk. Hopefully, Mrs. Mac could return it to his teachers.

Instead of books, Tim filled the bag with a few sturdy outfits, toiletries, a granola bar, and his camera. He knew the latter was probably a bad idea, but he couldn’t bear to part with it. His parents had given it to him for his seventh birthday.

He took a step back and stared at the half-full bag that contained what would soon be his only possessions. He bit his lip out of habit and winced as the gash opened, blood dribbling down his chin.

After wiping the blood away, he reached under his bed and pulled out his Batman blanket. His last nanny had given it to him years ago, sewing it herself. He knew he shouldn’t take it. It was childish. Something for babies. His parents had tried to throw it away, but he’d begged them to let him keep it.

After a moment, he hastily shoved the blanket into the backpack. He quickly zipped it closed, though there was no one around to see his moment of weakness.

_____

Jason Todd didn’t consider himself a good kid, but he’d definitely met worse. He may do what he has to to survive, but that never involved hurting another person. No gangs, no drugs, and no supervillains. That was more than he could say for most of the homeless middle school dropouts in his neighborhood.

His relatively clean conscience wasn’t the only reason why he stuck mostly to petty theft. Jason didn’t want trouble. If he wanted to stay alive and out of the foster care system, he couldn’t afford it either. He kept his nose in his own business, and people left him alone for the most part.

His personal rules went out the window, however, when he came across the batmobile, idling unsupervised in Crime Alley, just a few blocks from his squat. As soon as Jason got a good look at those custom, sleek, black tires….

Well, he considered himself a decent kid, not a fucking saint.

He’d already removed two bolts from the first tire when he realized he wasn’t alone. At the movement from the corner of his eyes, he jumped up from his crouch, brandishing the tire iron.

“Come out from behind the dumpster, creep,” he growled, expecting some two-bit thug or maybe even Batman to step into the dim light of the street lamp.

Instead, it was a little kid with dark hair, blue eyes, and a hell of a fat lip. Even from a couple yards away, Jason could see how his hands gripped the straps of his backpack like a lifeline, knuckles white. The bag was almost as big as him.

“That’s the batmobile,” the kid blurted out.

Jason raised an eyebrow, and the young boy’s ears went slightly pink. “I noticed. What are you doing out here, kid?”

Because it was obvious he didn’t belong. The kid was a little skinny for Jason’s taste, but his clothes were quality, and he’d definitely been bathing on the regular. There wasn’t a single speck of dirt under his nails.

Instead of answering Jason’s question, he eyed his shoes as he scuffed them against the dirty pavement. “You shouldn’t take Batman’s tires. He’s a hero. He fights bad guys and makes the city a better place.”

Definitely hadn’t been on the streets long, Jason thought.

The older boy rolled his eyes. “Since he’s such a great guy, I’m sure he won’t mind donating his tires to the cause.”

The other boy didn’t have anything to say to that, so they lapsed into silence. Instead of picking up the tire iron and finishing the job or heading for the hills, Jason eyed the kid.

“Your parents do that to your face?”

The younger boy’s hand drifted up to his bloody lip, seemingly without his permission. “N-no.”

“Lemme guess,” Jason drawled, “you fell.”

The boy’s eyes went wide, and Jason snorted. “Word of advice, kid: come up with a better excuse before child services catches up with you.”

“I don’t want to go into foster care,” the kid mumbled.

“Yeah. You, me, and every other kid in this city. It’s the stuff of nightmares.”

There was a rustle of movement on the roof above him, and Jason froze. He’d been perfectly willing to risk Batman’s wrath when it was only his bacon getting cooked.

“Run, kid,” he ordered, eyeing the roofline with suspension.

“Why?”

Internally groaning, Jason grabbed Tim by the elbow and pulled him along. The kid didn’t put up any kind of fight, which would get him killed or worse pretty quick on these streets. Jason put that out of his mind for the moment, though, running down the unlit alley with the younger boy in tow.

The kid kept gasping something about not needing to run from Batman. When Jason finally stopped to catch his breath, he said, “Second word of advice: Batman is not your friend, kid.”

A stubborn line in the other boy’s jaw appeared before Jason’s eyes.

“Yes, he is,” the boy said mulishly. “He’s a hero.”

Letting the matter drop for the moment, Jason appraised the boy again. He was painfully small and would be easy prey for predators, traffickers, and all manner of bad guys that roamed Crime Alley. Honestly, he’d be surprised if the kid lasted the night.

But that wasn’t Jason’s problem, he reminded himself. His squat was only a block or so away, and there was half a can of tomato soup and a few cheetos waiting for him. He could barely keep himself alive and fed. He couldn’t go involving himself with every runaway he happened across.

Jason heard himself ask, “You have somewhere to stay tonight?”

The kid glanced back the way they’d come, and Jason remembered he’d found him behind a dumpster. There were worse places to spend the night. The smell kept most people away, and it’d be warm enough on a September night.

Jason had certainly had worse, so why did the thought of this kid curled up on the dirty ground all night make his chest hurt?

“I’ve got a place,” he said slowly, regretting it even before the words were out of his mouth. This kid was undoubtedly trouble. “Nothing fancy. Four walls, roof, whatever. If you wanted--”

“I could stay with you?” The kid finished eagerly.

“One night offer only,” Jason amended gruffly.

There was a wetness to his eyes, and Jason hastily looked away before it could tug anymore at his heart. But instead of crying, the kid smiled.

“That’s ok! One night would be great,” the kid said brightly. “People don’t usually want me around longer than that anyway.”

Jason swallowed at that. “What’s your name anyway, kid?”

“Tim,” he said, and then stuck out his hand like a miniature of a businessman on TV.

Despite himself, he laughed. “Jason.”

The answering smile was blinding. “Nice to meet you, Jason.”

He finally gave in and shook the boy’s hand, if only to get him to put it down. “Let’s go home, kid.”

“Home for the night,” he said, walking along Jason without complaint.

“Right,” the older boy said doubtfully. “Just for the night.”

Let me know what you think/read more here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31240799

#batman #robin #Tim Drake #Jason Todd #fanfiction

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gayenerd · 3 years

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I have literally no source for this interview, but it’s one of my favorites because Billie seems to be really honest about his songwriting here - this is when Nimrod came out

The day I met Billie Joe Armstrong he flashed me his new tattoo, a Chuck-Jones-perfect cartoon character on his right bicep. Above it was some skull or Celtic armband or something, but below was the name "Joseph," exquisitely lettered, for his firstborn child. It's that image of him that I always keep in my head, and what I think of when I hear his band, Green Day: loopy humor and face-punch riffs and sincere sentiment I tight formation, worn as close to the skin as possible, covered in sweat. From the band's first records on the local Berkeley label Lookout, 39/Smooth and Kerplunk!, through the multi-million selling Warner Brothers releases Dookie, Insomniac, and now Nimrod, Armstrong has written dozens of perfect little punk-rock ditties that are probably the most sincere and playful acts of musical aggression since that first punk wave twenty years ago.

But the songs are more than throwbacks. Armstrong writes from a very personal perspective, the perspective of someone born in the Me Decade, raised in the Me-vs.-You Decade, and trying to cope in the Yet-to-be-Stereotyped Decade. His songs are about the current crises of being alive right now, in a society that's used up and marketed all of its counter-cultures, and has little use for its youth except as consumers. The songs are also about how one reconciles anger and rebellion with love and desire to not be so down all the time. It's less political and more personal than its punk rock predecessors, an angry/crying/shouting/fucking definition of self.

It made me wonder how you can take bile directed at you and turn it into a song that gets sold at the local Sam Goody. I figured I'd ask, so I called him up at his home in Berkeley.

Q: Where do you start when writing a song?

A: Most of the time I'll come up with a melody, and I'll do lyrics, but I'll tackle them at different times and not connect the two, you know? So I'll come up with the riffs, and the melody of the song, like a short ditty. I'll put some lyrics to it and bring it to band practice and then we'll just start to pound it out. And then, as things need to be restructured, sometimes Mike [Dirnt, bassist] will have an idea for something, or Tré [Cool, drummer] will have an idea for something, or sometimes we'll just leave it alone and it's sort of already done.

Q: Have there been any particular songs that have stayed the same from the original inspiration to recording, or have they all gone through changes in the process?

A: There's a lot of them that stay the same. "Redundant" really never changed, except we made it a little longer by adding another chorus at the end. And there's this song called "All The Time" that's pretty much exactly the way I had it.

Q: So how much does a song change then, in producing the record? On Nimrod there are a lot of different arrangements: strings on "Good Riddance," horns on "King For A Day." Did you have the ragtime horns in mind when you were writing?

A: No, not at all. I actually demo'd that song and played all the instruments myself and showed it to the band and they're like, "oh, that's pretty cool." We fucked around with it and practiced it a couple of times, but we never expected it to go onto the record. Then when we got to the studio, we said whatever, we'll just put it on there. It ended up being pretty good, but the song was just screaming for horns. We got Gabe [McNair] and Steve [Bradley] and it was so funny. They said, "what do you want us to play?" And I said, 'I'm sure you'll think of something.' And they looked at me like, "aw man!" So they basically wrote all the horn parts to that song.

Q: What's more important, lyrics or the music?

A: I think lyrics are really important, because there are songs that, musically, I don't think are the greatest in the world but lyrically are amazing. I mean, Johnny Rotten never had the greatest voice in the world but he wrote really good lyrics for the first Sex Pistols record, and that goes for a lot of people. But the thing is, a lot of people tend to -- especially in pop songs -- they tend to take the music and put something sappy to it, and it's just a one-dimensional emotion that the rest of the songs has to carry. I was actually thinking about that yesterday. I went to a friend's house, and they were joking around, putting on the Spice Girls records. And it was blatantly catchy, super catchy, but at the same time it really didn't say anything. You could only hold it at face value, there was no depth behind it, you really couldn't tell anything about the people singing it. But I guess there's a need for that. People want to hear songs that don't say anything, they want to go out to a dance club and shake their booty.

Q: That's a good question, then: what makes a good song? Depth, a point of view...?

A: I guess so. I don't know. I know what I like, personally. Like, yesterday I did my top ten favorite songs or something like that.

Q: What's on there?

A: Let's see. "Surrender" by Cheap Trick. "In My Life" by the Beatles. A song called "They'll Never Call It Quits" by a band called One Man Army. Generation X, "Kiss Me Deadly." "Outsider" by the Ramones. Hüsker Dü, "Makes No Sense At All."

Q: How do you deal with writer's block?

A: I write something else, just for fun. I'm just habitual about it. If I can't come up with the song...the great song that you want to write that will leave your mark forever or something cheesy like that, I'll write a polka number if I can't come up with something.

Q: Do you put that kind of pressure on yourself? Do you say "this one's gonna be a statement?"

A: Sometimes I do. Sometimes I'll think way. I just have a really strong work ethic. I have that sort of way about all my songs that, lyrically, every single one of them has to have some subliminal thing going for it. But most people don't really get what you're talking about until 10 years after the fact anyway. That seems to be how people respect songwriters through time.

Q: Do you have a time of day or a place where you write? You say you have a work ethic, how does that manifest itself?

A: Anytime, every time. The other night I was dead tired. All I wanted to do was fall asleep, and me and [my wife] Adrienne get in bed, and we're laying there. I was just dozing off a little bit, and all of the sudden this music was popping in my head, going over and over. And I was like, aw man, I have to go downstairs to put this on my guitar and just write it down. But I don't want to. I was so tired. So finally I got up and I go, 'goddammit! I have to get this done.' Otherwise I would forget it.

Q: When you're writing, do you write with an album in mind or song by song?

A: Song by song. I can't really conceptualize that far in advance. We knew we wanted to change and bring in new elements on the new record. But we really didn't know how to do it. So I wrote, constantly, all kinds of songs. Fifty or something. And you try to find some sort of natural progression within those songs, and try to capture that on the record.

Q: So are the songs you write linked by your state of mind, or thematically?

A: Sometimes if I'll get into a depression, writer's block, where I can't write, I get really bummed out and then I'm not working at all, I'm not doing anything. And then I'll deliberately get myself down to the lowest of the low that I could possibly get down to. And then a song will pop up. And I'll be happy, I'll get ecstatic for like the next month and then all of the sudden another one will pop up.

Q: So you revel in the dark zone and it's useful.

A: Yeah...sort of...I kind of...well...definitely.

Q: But you don't necessarily choose to be there...

A: Sometimes I'll cause problems just so I can get in touch with that emotional side or whatever, you know. Just to see if something will spark up, start a fight or something (laughs).

Q: Can you name a song that has come out of something like that?

A: Umm...a song called "Worry Rock."

Q: Seems like a really personal song.

A: Yeah. I think I got drunk and put my fist through a window. Adrienne called me an asshole or something like that and, I don't know. We just got into some meaningless fight like most couples get into, those fights that don't make any sense. A fight for the sake of fighting, which can be destructive to your relationship. That's how that song came about.

Q: Are you okay with that kind of exposure that comes from investing your personal life and emotions in a song like that? Is your family okay with that?

A: Yeah, I think so. I guess the only problem would be if, say, Adrienne doesn't have an outlet for herself. That's the kind of thing that I worry about. The things that she could say about me could be pretty horrifying.

Q: In what way are you a different songwriter now than you were on 39/Smooth and Kerplunk?

A: It goes in a way of, you know, what kind of person were you at sixteen, and what kind of person are you at twenty? It's almost like two different people in some aspects. I think that most of my stuff is based on infatuations with women. Some are just straight obsession. I mean, nowadays you could call me a stalker (laughs). The quest for that ultimate happiness with another person, which I think started to change, and it changed pretty dramatically with Kerplunk, because I started to talk about other things, like loss of innocence, going out on your own, moving out at the age of seventeen, being a high school dropout, living in west Oakland in a warehouse with fifteen people. Where the first record was more...mushy...the next one you could tell I was going through some pretty dramatic changes.

Q: So Dookie comes out, and where are you there?

A: I think I turned more bitter. I started to realize where my true friendships were, the politics of Berkeley were setting in, drug abuse was starting to fuck with me a little bit. I was trying to figure out what was wrong with me, but I couldn't really do it and that had a lot to do with drugs. I started to get a lot more bitter. Life wasn't how it was supposed to be when you're on your own. There's a couple of different songs on there...I mean, the psychoses that went into that record! Songs like "Basket Case" and "Coming Clean" were blatantly neurotic songs.

Q: That's messed up: amazing success, and it's your bitterness you're being celebrated for.

A: I don't know. It's funny because I feel that once you write a song, and then record it, and then release it, it doesn't necessarily belong to you anymore. I mean, you can hold that piece of work closer to you than anybody else can, and that was one of the big problems for a while. I felt so misunderstood all the time. Which goes with the territory, anyway, of writing songs. Because nobody really understands what the hell you're talking about. Other people have interpretations of whatever, figure out their own plot, make it fit to the soundtrack of their own lives. It messed with me a little bit, 'cause people didn't know where I came from, people didn't know where I came from, people didn't really know what I stood for. People calling us a throwback to 1977, I guess I got affected by that. Because punk rock is a lifestyle for me, and has nothing to do with 1977 or any particular band, but the relationship that you had with and the amount of work that you put into your local scene. And it gets completely misinterpreted as trying to make a buck.

Q: It wasn't a fashion statement, it was a lifestyle.

A: Yeah, a lot of people took it as a fashion statement, even to the point where I think a lot of people thought we were the '90s equivalent of Sha Na Na or something. Some of that's kind of funny, whatever. But now I sort of don't care. No one's gonna understand it anyway. The whole success or fame thing was so new to me at the time, it came so abruptly, and I was like, wow, this is too much. I didn't know all this baggage was connected to all this shit. I thought I'd just have the opportunity to play my songs for people.

Q: Is that why the new album is as different as it is, because you're just doing what you want to do, you don't have to be what people thought you were, or even what you thought you were?

A: I think so. That might have something to do with it. I think when you stop caring and worrying about what people think, even stop caring what you think of yourself to a certain extent, and just sort of do it, it's a release to push your past behind you. I think that's when the best stuff comes out. And, of course, when you're forging ahead really hard. I think this time our songs are much more than just things that you can listen to, but actually visualize at the same time. It's like this guy told me the other day, this friend of mine, he goes, you know I was listening to that song "Platypus," and I can totally imagine this big western stampede of horses and cows. And that, for me, is exactly what I was thinking. Not that I was thinking of a stampede, you know, but that kind of quality.

Q: So you communicated an image and a feeling.

A: Exactly.

Q: Of any of your songs, do you have a favorite?

A: Lately, I like "Walking Alone" and "Uptight" I've been into. My mind changes all the time.

Q: Let's talk about one of those. What are the circumstances around a song like "Walking Alone?"

A: I play in this side project band called Pinhead Gunpowder. This guy Aaron Elliot writes all the lyrics and a lot of the music. And he wrote this song called "I Walk Alone," which is about walking at night, the streets, being a street punk. And so I wrote...I don't know what you'd call it -- an alter ego song? -- called "Walking Alone."

Q: An answer song?

A: Yeah, cause we always work in that sort of way. I wrote a song called "She," so he wrote an article in his fanzine called "She." It's kind of funny, it's really good to bounce things off of each other. So "Walking Alone" and "I Walk Alone" were sort of the same thing. I think Tom Petty could play that song. It's got that harmonica and the big smashing snare sound on it. But it was the first time I ever played harmonica. I can't play harmonica at all. I had to teach myself how to play that.

Q: Hey, you did great.

A: Oh, thanks. We actually tried to get a studio musician to play it, but I think he was a little too hobo for us.

Q: Smelled bad?

A: Actually, he had almost too much soul for it. He was too good at what he did. And I wanted it to come across more loosely. Not as good, I guess. So I played it.

Q: It's not a confident song, or a song about confidence. "Sometimes I need to apologize/sometimes I need to admit that I ain't right."

A: It's sort of like sticking your foot in your mouth sometimes, and thinking out loud, but the lyric changes. It turns into talking about friends and how they change and your friends either become lawyers or the local town drunks.

Q: Any advice for people writing who want to be hit songwriters?

A: Oh God, I don't know. Don't take advice from anybody.

#'The things that she could say about me could be pretty horrifying'#yeah i bet #interview #article #articles #billie joe armstrong

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always5hineee · 4 years

Text

Hell and Back- Chapter 33: A Halfway Leap (Trials 50-60)

Word count: 3839

Chapter warnings: Mild language, strong themes, severe gore

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The Faith Trials would end up being the least favorite of hers in the bunch.

Looking back on her own story, she never would have guessed the shit she was about to be put through. It was unimaginable, and yet, she had nothing better to do than think about it. Rushing past her, thousands of millions of entities, and yet no way to stop, all she could do was think. And what better to think about than them?

She hated the Faith Trials because they drove everyone apart. It was the smallest little things, yes, but they would fester and grow until there was nothing left but sickness and disgustingness between them. She was no exception.

How was one to know when a friendship was over? Is it when you're first forced to Google that fateful question? Is it when you have nothing to talk about, or the you begin actively hating each other?

They only had three trials left incomplete. They chose two truths, and one dare. She didn't care to remember the truths. They made everyone angry. Why else would they be given to them, after all? Of course, in the course of events, someone must know what happened. The boys certainly remember what happened. The narrative does exist. However, this is Y/N's fault, her prize, her story. If she doesn't remember, there is nothing to be done. She scolded herself for forgetting. It was like deleting a few scenes of your favorite movie just because your favorite character died. It was incomplete. There was a significant difference, though. This was most assuredly not her favorite movie.

She was elated when that fateful screen graced her vision.

Congratulations! You have completed the Faith Trials. Welcome to Round 5, the Delegate Trials! Round 5 will consist of 8 trials for any and all players. If a player cannot continue or chooses to drop out, the trial will be null for that player and they will be penalized with the dropout fee. Other players are not affected. Round 5 will end after trial 60.

They all slept alone the night before these trials. The Delegate Trials. Certainly a gruesome experience. It was also the shortest set of trials since the preliminaries. That didn't mean they were any better. Maybe it was the sheer visceral reaction of what was to come that made her memory so flawed regarding the trials beforehand. Their concept was simple. Each trial would select a Player. Sometimes they'd be given the option, other times not. That player could choose to complete one task, (again, obviously, chosen by the game), or force another player to do a different task. She didn't know exactly what these choices were based on, but the task was always revealed before the first player made their choice, so it was complete guilt. What a perfect game to play just after their foundations had been so steadily shaken.

For example, Trial 53. A classic party game. All the trials seemed to start out this way, with a mildly risky, innocent game of fun. By the end of each section, they were lying under trains. In this case, they selected two players. Suho demanded a turn, as well as Kris. Once they'd been put into the app, they were offered a decision. One was to place his hand on a dartboard, (something that, as boys, they actually did own), while the other threw darts. The initial player could position their hand however they liked, but couldn't move it during arcs. They could only rearrange it between throws. No darts would be taken out of the board under any circumstances until five had been thrown, and any that missed didn't count. Their other option was to force Baekhyun and Lay to take up the same offer.

They had argued heavily regarding this trial. Baekhyun had significantly smaller hands than all the other players involved in the challenge, so he was the obvious choice for the dartboard. In fact, he pointed this out himself, more than willing to take it on, and putting no risk on Lay. Suho, as always, had a problem with this, as he wanted to assume the brunt of the danger, even if they were all a bit on edge. In the end, Baekhyun had no ability to dictate his decision, and since Suho had requested to keep the trial, he was the one who got to put his hand on the board.

Kris had admittedly good aim, likely from all the shitty party games he'd played in his years. Suho, inversely, was unwavering in his stance, whether to keep appearances strong for the group or simply because he'd numbed himself. He was only hit once. It was on the third dart, and his blood dripped down the wall in a beautifully tragic red stream. It was between the two tendons of his middle and pointer finger. Kris looked concerned and moved to help, but Suho only reminded him that they weren't to remove the dart. They finished. Lay healed him, with some difficulty- he was growing tired.

Trial 54. The knife game. Again, simple, a common party game. Except people tended to use butter knives, pencils, or other relatively harmless objects. True to form, this little endeavor required a real knife. It was either Kai's challenge, or he could pass it to Y/N. She insisted that she was familiar with the game, begging him to let her do it instead, but he refused. He passed with a little nick to his ring finger, barely even bleeding. Lay had fallen asleep, so they covered it with a Band-Aid and moved on.

Trial 55. This is where things started to get really, really serious. They were told to supply a player once again, and Xiumin volunteered. Once he received his challenge, though, he'd quickly regretted it. He was meant to stick his hand into the garbage disposal of the sink. There were four switched on the back. They would have to flip one. Even if any of them remembered which one turned on the drain, (which, none of them did), whoever was in charge of the trials had proven themselves capable of changing the circumstances. It could have easily been tampered with. If Xiumin didn't want to do it, he could pass it on to Chen.

Chen insisted on letting him complete the trial. Even though Xiumin was older, he scared a little bit more easily, and Chen felt as if he hadn't really done much since the start. Obviously, they had all been through a lot, but he wanted to contribute, especially after Xiumin had been forced to hang from the roof of a building against his will. It took a few minutes of debating, but Xiumin finally conceded. Chen was left to do the challenge.

He shoved his hand in the drain as Kyungsoo explained the mechanics of a sink garbage disposal. Thankfully, there weren't actually any sharp blades, so unless he stuck his hand all the way in the bottom where the bolts held the metal pieces, he shouldn't be cut badly should it turn on. Any trauma to his hand would be blunt force. That didn't do much to make him feel better about it. Out of the four switches, they debated which it could be. They figured the one furthest from the sink was a safe bet, as for wiring purposes it would be impractical to place it there.

They had been wrong. He broke three fingers. Lay was still passed out, so even as the tears of pain rolled down his face, he wrapped his hand up and indicated to continue the trials. He could fix it later. Xiumin felt awful- that should have been him, he let a kid take his place and now Chen was in serious pain. He would have undone it if he could... But they'd lost that ability with Tao. Even then, he may have been limited- they weren't even paying attention to the qualifications at this point. She was zoning out further and further with every challenge.

Trial 56. This was the first trial in which two options for activities were given. Activities was a shitty name for them- she didn't know what else to call them. Events? Outings? It all sounded corny and completely non-representative. Either Lay could lie on the highway for five minutes without moving, or Y/N could let one of the other members carve a '56' into her forearm with a knife. She remembered thinking to herself that this was bordering on abusive- as if it hadn't already crossed, chewed up, and spit out that line.

Suho wanted Lay to do the challenge. He under no circumstances wanted Y/N doing anything to hurt herself, as had been evidenced in the Solo Trials. Y/N, in turn, saw that something was going on with Lay, not to mention that the risk of the highway far outweighed some light bleeding. In truth, the thought of someone slicing up her skin made her sick, but what was she to do? Out of all of them, she had done by far the least to continue the trials, and she was the one getting the reward! But... they didn't know that.

Suho was arguing with her, much louder than she would have expected from him. He was normally so respectful, especially when it came to her, but something in him had snapped since that one round of truth. Maybe he just didn't have as much of a regard for her after she'd chosen him. Nonetheless, he couldn't do anything to stop her as she sprinted over to Lay's sleeping form, shaking him awake. He blinked forcefully, eyes tearing up at the light as he muttered something about not being able to see. She muttered that she needed him to say 'I concede'. That was it, that's all the app needed to hear. The stupid, fucking, nightmare of an app. He did it.

Kris was the one to do it. Kai looked like he was going to throw up, turning away to face the wall. Sehun covered his ears like a baby to try and avoid hearing her hisses of pain. He used her own pocketknife, the one she'd been carrying since the beginning for the trials. It was as small as he could make it without the letters becoming indecipherable. Didn't stop it from hurting like shit. The 6 was the worst, as it was one long, drawn out, agonizingly slow cut into her skin. As soon as it was done, he promptly bandaged it.

Trial 57. This was strangely easy- they had to select a person, for which they put forth Chanyeol on his own volunteering. He had the choice to harm him self with his own powers, or choose someone else in the group to hit him. As someone with fire powers, he wasn't sure if he'd be able to forcefully make his body allow himself to be burnt, but he didn't really care to find out. He let Suho hit him, since Chanyeol had been one of the ones to agree that he was the most obnoxious. It hurt, but not as much as a burn. That was the very abrupt, fairly calm end to trial 57. It was nothing compared to what was coming for them.

The fifty-eighth trial was something that would be ingrained in her mind forever. It was the sickest device pf psychological torture she had seen in her life, and although short, it was still saying something. The plot was elaborate to say the least. It took them to a location outside of the one they had been spending time in. The day was coming to a close once again, and she could barely remember how long ago they'd started this mess. It couldn't have been more than a few days, but it felt like millennia.

The setup was in a field, a baseball field to be precise. It was lit by floodlights, but there was no one in the area, so there were likely no games scheduled. On the side with the canopy, there were four harnesses tied to ropes, all lying in the copper colored dust of the playing field. Those were hooked into the canopy, then lowered back down, with three times as many ropes as had been entered. There were also two more garishly noticeable details- a giant, rusted, yellow device, and an oversized pair of garden trimmers.

The trial was complicated, to say the least. They had been split into two groups, not of their choosing. They would have to decide which group took the harnesses, and which took the clippers. If the group with the extra member chose the harnesses, they would all be strung up, but if the other did, they would simply have one extra harness. Once they had decided, they would be suspended over the functioning woodchipper. The more people strung up, the less ropes would be cut, as there would be less people on the ground team. However, in a worst case scenario, all of the suspended team could end up chuck. If it was any consolation, the game offered them a skipped trial for every person who felt into the chipper.

The teams were, as far as they could observe, randomly selected. The larger team consisted of Sehun, Kai, Kyungsoo, Chanyeol, Chen, and Lay, with the smaller being made up of Y/N, Suho, Kris, Baekhyun and Xiumin. In this, they were torn. The smaller team, most particularly Suho and Kris both wanted to be the ones up in the ropes. Not because they were particularly brave, no, but more out of a sense of responsibility and pride. However, it conflicted with all of their interests to bring Y/N up there with them. Not only that, but with the larger team cutting, there was more of a chance of someone getting dropped. Kyungsoo tried to explain how this wasn't exactly true, and that the math worked out evenly, but no one really cared.

Y/N insisted that she'd be fine in the harnesses. After all, for every one person, there were three ropes. That was only a 33% chance of getting dropped. Not only that, but altogether, the percentage was actually less, as there would be an extra harness. Sehun asked what would happen if she were to get dropped, but swallowing, she just reminded him of the rule for Player 1. That didn't sit well with anyone.

They decided on the smaller team. It was, simply speaking, the least amount of people at risk. They all stepped into the harnesses, buckling them around their waists and tightening them to a snug fit. The app gave a warning before they started that, should they escape from the harness, and somehow manage to avoid the sharp fall, they would automatically be rewarded with the dropout penalty. She didn't even catch what it was before the screen glinted away. She tried to reach it, but Suho calmly told her not to bother, as none of them were going to drop out anyway.

As soon as she'd selected they were ready, their bodies were flung into the air, and the woodchopper activated. She had no idea how remote these systems were, but looking down into the churning blades of the machine was making her want to scream out for someone to help her. Xiumin didn't seem to be faring much better. Baekhyun had gone into some sort of shutdown, not reacting to anything or anyone, simply staring into he void, as if he wasn't even looking at the machine below them. Kris was acting cool, and Suho seemed to be... at peace.

She'd remember Xiumin's whimpers for the rest of her life. It was like a sick dog cornered by wolves in an alley, just barely audible over the screeching of the appliance beneath them. She heard one line clearer than crystal, though.

"Y/N, I don't wanna die."

"You're not going to, honey."

Kai was the first to cut a rope. He was the boldest out of all of them, but in reality, it was out of cowardice. The more ropes there were, the less of a chance he had of killing someone. He didn't want their blood on his hands. Luckily, he didn't have to worry about it. His cut was a blank.

Lay was still not doing too hot. He was still not doing too well, and his skin was rather hot, although he complained about being cold. Kai had given him a Tylenol, basically figuring out that it was a fever. It had helped slightly, which is how he'd been able to make it to the field to begin with. With the assistance of the other members, he made his cut as well. Blank.

After Chanyeol made his cut is when Baekhyun started to get antsy. Kris was still holding himself strong, but he wasn't saying anything, leading her to be certain that it was all an act. As long as he could keep it up, though, she was willing to let him. They couldn't all be messes by the end of this. Chen was next, glaring up at Kris, and she wondered if he was silently hoping that he would fall in. No one did.

Kyungsoo tried to think about it logically, calculating which ropes had already been cut and the probability of distribution. He was worried his overthinking would be his downfall. Finally, he just shut his eyes and picked at random. He wasn't a fan of chance, but in this case, it seemed to be his best bet. It payed off.

Sehun was the last to cut. Looking at him, one would have thought that he was the one hanging from the ropes. He was trembling, although trying to hide it, as he held the clippers in his hand. Eyes flitting back and forth frantically between ropes, trying to mentally grab the one that wouldn't kill anybody. It was here that Y/N made eye contact with Suho.

It was scary, his expression. His eyes were half-lidded, and he had a small smile floating across his face. His hands, which had been previously clutching onto his belt, were limp at his side, his body seemingly completely relaxed. He noticed her gaze, and looked over to her lazily. It was scaring her, especially after how angry he'd been all day. No matter how old she'd grow in the future, no matter how many times she thought about his next words to her, she had no idea how he'd known.

"You know, Y/N, I was always scared of getting old." Her brows had furrowed when he said this. Then, everything went silent as his body dropped from her vision. She knew she screamed, she felt it scratch her throat and rip her lungs into shreds, but she didn't hear it. It was probably for the best. Have you ever heard someone fall into a woodchipper? She was glad she didn't. If someone had asked her before this, she would have made a joke out of it, probably say "crunchy". Not now.

The blood splattered up past her knees, leaving the four of them basically soaked. It wasn't just the liquid, either. Xiumin was crying and screaming, torn between covering his eyes and staring into the abysmal, silver and red void of the machine. Kris, for the first time threw up, coating himself and the ground below him in nastiness. She had completely zoned out, unable to scream again through the pain, vision swimming as she tried to comprehend what had just happened. Baekhyun was clutching himself and rocking back and forth from the rope as the machine turned off, the harnesses lowering to the ground, all four of them curled up in the dirt, not knowing what to do.

The other group would have come to help them, but they weren't faring much better. Sehun had fallen to the ground almost immediately, screaming out in a mix of terror and guilt, covering the back of his head with his hands as he shook. As woodchoppers traditionally worked, one end was for wood, and the other for wood...chips. This one functioned no differently. Before anyone had even gotten the chance to realize Suho's fate, he was already spewed all over them in small, wood chip-like chunks. It was disgusting.

There was nothing any of them could say. At least they got to skip a trial? At least Suho didn't have to face his worst fear? At least it was only one? None of it added up. That was their leader, one of the cornerstones of their friendship. He cared for all of them, no matter how harsh he could be. He would have gladly died for any one of them, but he shouldn't have had to. And now he was gone. Not only gone, but there wasn't even anything for them to bury.

They went home in silence. They could have reported it to the police. Something gave them the sense that the evidence would be gone when they returned. Everyone needed to shower. It almost felt disrespectful, but no one wanted to go to sleep with Suho's blood on their hands, literally, or figuratively. Sehun was in a state of shock, but he was only minority ahead of Xiumin and Baekhyun. As she showered, she saw the water beneath her turn red, causing her to throw up again. She heard one of the boys knock on the door to check on her, but she didn't answer. They probably understood.

When she made it back to the room to figure out the sleeping situation, she saw that one of the only other people done showering was Kai. They hadn't been on the best terms as of late, but she was scared, devastated, and so, so tired. Saying nothing, she sat down next to him, leaning into his chest. He didn't ask any questions, wrapping his arms around her. A few minuets later, she felt another body against her. One eye opening a sliver, she saw that it was Xiumin. As each boy returned, they joined the pile, not one saying anything. She didn't remember when, but at some point, they all fell asleep.

They didn't want to keep going. They convinced themselves that it's what he would have wanted, but that was a cruel joke. None of them had expected this to be fatal. They needed Tao. No one knew where he was, and his name had been removed from the game. There were some injuries that Lay just couldn't fix, not to mention his sick state.

They were able to skip trial 59, thankfully. The last one, 60, quite classically, was a game of Russian Roulette. It didn't have nearly the effect it was supposed to. They were all numb to it. She thought that everyone, silently, probably wanted to be the one to lose. No one did.

And yet... they all did.

Go to Chapter 34

#exo #exo x reader #exo fanfiction #exo fanfic #kai #kyungsoo #baekhyun #lay #xiumin #sehun #suho #chen #chanyeol #kris #luhan #tao #kpop #Kpop x reader #Kpop fanfiction #Kpop fanfic #x reader #trials

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uss-birdbrain · 5 years

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Ruby’s Rainbow

This is chapter one of an original work with original characters. Any comments or criticism is more than welcome!(I’m on mobile so I generally apologize for formatting)

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"Today's the day," Ruby muttered to herself as she closed the door. Turning to lock it behind her, then she went through a mental checklist; water bottle? Check. Two weeks of food? Check. One hundred and fifty dollars? Check. She had everything she needed. After two years of careful preparation, she could go find her hero; Captain Lawrence; a revolutionary from Smaragdine.

She could not wait to meet him in person after all these years, of only his ideas in books. When her father gifted her his book two years ago, she had no idea how much it would change her life. She had to find him and help him reunite the fractured kingdoms.

“Welcome home honey; how was school?” Ruby’s mother was singing, as she walked in (With smudges of flour on her chestnut face, and in her crimson hair) to hug her daughter.

“It was fine mom,” Ruby replied happily while she went to put her backpack away. “Where’s dad? I need to ask him some questions about my trip.” Ruby asked.

“Looking for someone?” Her father questioned from the stairs holding a backpack bulging at the seams. “Today’s the big day! You’re finally leaving to join the revolution! I know, you’ve been dreaming about this for years, I mean, I’ve only heard about it, what, five hundred million times!” he said sarcastically.

“Really dad? Pass me the provisions.” Ruby quipped back at him. He sent it sailing through the air towards her and she barely catches it. “Hey! I said pass not throw. You could damage something!” she said, annoyed. “All I’m doing today is a quick check of all my stuff. Tomorrow is Saturday so I can head out early and get to the royal docks by 10:00 and be on my way to Smaragdine! If I’m right, no-one should bother me and I will get to Smaragdine in two days’ time.” Ruby said with a determined smile on her face as she unzipped the backpack. She looked everything over and with a smile said, “Everything's here. I’m going to eat dinner and go to bed early so I can have an early start tomorrow!” she said already making her way towards the fridge. She opens the fridge and grabs some leftover meat and a bottle of water.

She downs the water quickly and then only spends a few minutes on her food before putting her dishes in the sink and going upstairs. She goes to her room and falls asleep as soon as her head hits the pillow

“Beep beep bee-” My alarm goes off and I slap the OFF button. I crawl out of bed and go to my closet to get dressed for my journey.

I pick out a pale red long-sleeve shirt and dark red jeans. I’m sad to cut my madderian fire-red hair that had hung to below my waist back to only a couple of inches. I’m careful to put on a hoodie so I can easily hide my hair. On my way to the table, I tug on a pair of hiking boots and grab a bagel off the kitchen counter. While I eat, I scribble down a note to my parents,

“Dear mom and dad,

Sorry I didn’t have time to say goodbye but I had to leave early

Love you-Ruby”

I begin to head for the door and before I leave I turn around and look back at my house, my home that I may never return to. I remember my childhood, first five years as an only child before the twins: at first, I hated them but, now I love them.

It was my first day of middle school, I was miserable because it was so much harder than elementary school. As soon as I got home the twins (fresh from their first day of kindergarten) swarmed around me. They told me so many stories of their days that I had to smile. That was when I knew my life would be worse without them.

I look at my watch and grimace, no more time for memories I have to get going. I turn around and leave barely remembering to lock the door behind myself as I head off into the world...alone. I walk away from my house determined before my best friend Sylvia comes running at me.

"Slow Down it's not like I'm gonna' run away," I say and I barely catch her before she runs into me.

"Isn't that exactly what you're doing? Besides I wanted to see you off!" she says with a huff.

"Point taken, now let's head off into the great unknown!!" I end with a shout.

" Ican't, gotta get to school on time for early morning tutoring, Unlike one dropout I know of!" she says laughing before running off. As she left sadness rushed over me, but I must move on

I make my way toward the royal docks well I guess the only docks. With the only boats on the whole island.

As I walk I make sure to avoid big streets and anywhere there might be a guard to see me. Citizens are not allowed at the dock and definitely not off the island. Well too bad for them because I'm going to do both of those things and they can't do anything about it.

I arrive at the docks just as the guards go on their five-minute break in between shifts... exactly as planned. Once I know I won't be seen. I sneak over the fence. after climbing over the fence I board a ship almost ready to go, but before I can set sail a bell rings. The bell means I took too long and the shift change is already over. There won't be another one until noon and it's only 9:00 in the morning! I scrambled under the tarp covering the boat before I'm seen and set my watch to alarm me five minutes before noon. After I know I'm safe I take off my sweatshirt, ball it up to make a pillow and take a nap

I wake up to the beeping of the alarm on my watch and rub my eyes before realizing the time. It is already 11:50 I only have ten minutes until the 12:00 shift change. I sit up as much as I can and gather my belongings. I only have time to put my sweatshirt back on and get my backpack on before I hear the bell ring. I wait a minute to make sure all the guards are gone before springing up from the bottom of the boat and getting the sails ready. once the sails are ready I realize I only have two more minutes before the bell rings again. So I decide to set sail without getting my map and compass set up beforehand. I hurriedly untie the ropes around the boat. I'm almost out of the area when I hear the bell signaling the workers to return to their posts. after leaving the area of the docks I finally unpack my bag and retrieve my map and compass. I look at my compass and to my surprise, I'm facing the wrong direction.

#writing #writeblr #ruby #ruby’s rainbow #ruby roman #original fiction #original characters #original #story

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thelastspeecher · 5 years

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Stan Dreams of Genie

Full disclosure: I have never seen “I Dream of Jeannie”. Just stole the name of the show for a witty title for this fic.

This fic was inspired by an amazing ask I got yesterday about a potential AU where Stan ends up in the Middle East during his years as a vagabond, and stumbles across a genie bottle. He rubs it, out pops a genie, and right after Stan wishes for a million dollars, he wishes for the genie’s freedom. The genie is so flattered by his compassion that she gives him a third wish, free, and becomes his travel companion. And thus ends up in Gravity Falls in 1982 along with Stan.

Enjoy.

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Stan slammed his fists on the metal of the machine that had taken his twin from him.

“Stanford! Stanford!” he screamed. He dropped to his knees. “I just got him back, I can’t lose him again, I-” Stan froze.

I still have a third wish! He spun around, raced over to the bag he had dropped during his fight with Ford, knelt, and unzipped the bag with such force he was surprised the fabric didn’t tear.

“Angie!” he shouted at the oil lamp nestled amongst his dirty clothes. “Get out here, I need you!” A faint yellow smoke began to escape from the spout of the lamp. Remembering the last time he had been too close to the lamp when Angie emerged, he fumbled back. “Can you pick up the pace a bit? It’s urgent.” The smoke began to pour out more quickly, eventually coalescing into the form of a young woman about Stan’s age, sitting cross-legged on the ground before him. She flipped her caramel-colored braid over one shoulder and adjusted her flannel top slightly.

“What’s wrong?” she asked. Stan opened and closed his mouth silently. Angie frowned, visibly concerned. “Stan?”

“It’s my brother, he-” Stan started. He looked over at the machine. Angie followed his gaze. Her eyes widened.

“That looks like a portal of some sort,” she remarked, getting to her feet. She strode over to the machine and began to inspect it.

“Well, that makes sense, then, ‘cause my brother went through it,” Stan said. He stood as well. “I need you to bring him back. I’m cashing in my third wish.”

“You have to phrase it like a wish, remember?”

“Right. Right.” Stan cleared his throat. “I wish for my twin brother to be back here with me.” Stan waited expectantly for the golden sparks that accompanied Angie’s magic, but nothing happened. “Uh, Angie? He’s not back.” Angie turned to face him, confusion etched on her face.

“Yeah. And ya still have yer third wish. I can feel it.” Like usual when Angie seemed distressed, her accent became thicker, and clearly southern. Which, in Stan’s opinion, was odd for a genie he’d found after breaking out of a Middle Eastern prison. But then again, he didn’t know much about genies.

Half the time, I don’t think Angie knows much about genies, either. Angie dug out a piece of paper from the back pocket of her denim shorts and scanned it. Yep. Out comes the cheat sheet. Stan would see Angie take out the piece of paper whenever she did something new with her powers. She even had to go over whatever was written on it before she granted his previous two wishes. Great. Ford’s rescue team is a high school dropout and the world’s worst genie.

“That’s…odd,” Angie mumbled to herself.

“What?” Stan asked. Angie looked up.

“I- if my magic didn’t work, he’s outside my range of effect,” she said, bemused. Stan immediately broke into a cold sweat.

“So what, he’s on the moon or something?”

“No, that’s in my range.”

“Pluto?”

“No, still in my range.” Angie chewed on her lip. “Stanley, the whole universe is within my range.”

“He’s not in the universe anymore?” Stan demanded.

“I- I guess not.”

“Then where the hell is he?”

“A dif’rent one.”

“A different what?”

“Universe,” Angie said. Stan stared at her. “Multiverse theory holds that there are multiple universes, based around different characteristics or paths people took.” Angie glanced back at the machine. “I guess yer brother managed to build himself an interdimensional portal.”

“A-” Stan dragged his hands down his face. “Angie! What the fuck!”

“I don’t have any answers fer you.”

“You’re supposed to be magic!”

“I’m well aware,” Angie snapped. She crossed her arms. “What, ya think I don’t get bothered by how I can’t always help?” Stan began to pace. Angie sighed. “You’ll just work yourself up to a full head of steam if ya-” she began.

“How the hell can I bring Ford back?” Stan ranted, ignoring her. “Magic won’t work, I don’t know shit about science, I don’t know who does, I don’t even know what the fuck Ford was really working on here. Why did he come to Bumfuck, Oregon, when he coulda done a million things with his science…stuff? Why here?” Stan felt tears begin to prick the corners of his eyes. “Why did he want to travel to other universes? Did he- did he really hate it here so much he had to get away? Across the country wasn’t far enough for him? Why-” Stan’s eyelids suddenly became very heavy. He yawned. “Why…” He could hear faint humming. “Angie…” Before he could say another word, everything went dark.

-----

Stan awoke in what seemed to be a darkened study of sorts. A desk was pushed up against the wall with loose pieces of paper scattered across it. A small table hid by the door, holding what looked like half-empty liquor bottles. And sitting on the floor in lotus position, was his genie. Stan sat up.

“Sorry I didn’t put ya in a bed. Couldn’t find one, fer whatever reason,” Angie said, uncrossing her legs. Stan shrugged.

“Eh. I’ve slept on worse.” He looked down at the blanket draped over him. He hadn’t seen it before, but its flowery, yellow pattern didn’t seem Ford’s style. “I’m guessing this is yours.” Angie nodded. Stan tossed the blanket over to her. She caught it, folded it quickly, and set it on the floor beside her.

“I apologize ‘bout all that, by the way,” Angie said sheepishly. “I wasn’t sure how to peacefully calm ya down. You were awful stressed. And ya needed some sleep anyways.”

“Wha- you made me fall asleep?” Stan demanded. Angie held up her hands in a placating gesture.

“A dreamless sleep,” she said. “So’s ya wouldn’t have any nightmares.”

“Angie!”

“Look, you were startin’ to cry! I’ve only ever seen ya do that when ya get overwhelmed and need a break. But you weren’t goin’ to take a break. You were goin’ to work yourself up more ‘n more, until you were a complete mess!”

“Yeah, but-” Stan ran a hand through his hair. “Holy Moses, Angie, ask next time! You basically drugged me!” Angie’s eyes widened.

“Oh. I- I hadn’t thought of it that way. I’m very sorry.”

“Yeah, well, you should be,” Stan muttered. He looked away. “So, did you figure out how to fix your magic while I was sleeping?”

“No.”

“Figures.” Stan huffed irritably. “You’re not a very good genie, y’know.” He winced.

I shouldn’t have insulted her. I always hated it when people told me I wasn’t smart.

“I’m workin’ on it.”

She doesn’t sound offended. Good. Stan frowned. Why the hell wasn’t she offended?

“And I might not have figured out how to make yer wish come true, but I think I’ve come up with a dif’rent route,” Angie continued. Stan looked at her again.

“Whattaya mean?”

“Directly transportin’ him won’t work, since he’s outside of my range. But what if ya wished to be able to bring him back?”

“That might work,” Stan said slowly, nodding his head. Angie beamed. “All right, I’ll give it a shot.” He cleared his throat. “I wish to be able to bring Ford back.” For a split second, it seemed like this wish wasn’t working, either. But then, accompanied by a shower of golden sparkles, a bedraggled man fell out of the air and onto the floor in front of Stan.

“Ow,” the man moaned weakly. Stan stared at him. The man’s clothes were dirty and torn, his hair had sticks and leaves in it, and he was splattered with mud and maybe worse. But the most noticeable thing about him was… Stan’s nose wrinkled.

Sweet Moses, he stinks like someone took a shit on a dump truck full of skunks. The man slowly got to his feet, his movements punctuated by more groaning. Stan looked at Angie for some sort of explanation, but she seemed shell-shocked, stunned into silence by the man’s sudden appearance. She opened her mouth cautiously.

“F-Fidds?” Angie squeaked. The man looked over at her. His jaw dropped.

“Angie?” the man said, aghast.

“Wait, Angie, you know this guy?” Stan asked. The man switched his attention to Stan.

“S-Stanford?”

“Uh, no.”

“No. No,” the man muttered. “His twin.”

“…Yeah.” Stan stood up. “Who the hell are you?”

“I’m-” The man abruptly passed out, his head narrowly landing on Angie’s folded blanket rather than the hardwood floor. Stan threw his hands up in the air in exasperation.

“Great!” He turned to Angie. “You acted like you knew him. What’s his name?” Angie was still visibly shaken but managed to respond in a steady voice.

“Fiddleford. Fiddleford McGucket.”

#.....not linking to the ask bc apparently links mess with tags #it's just under my ''ask'' tag on my blog tho. real easy to find.#Stanley Pines #Angie McGucket #Fiddleford McGucket #Angenie AU #AU of Stanley McGucket AU #my writing #my stuff #ficlet #speecher speaks

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reneehearts · 4 years

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Sunrise or sunset? Sunrise

Are you mentally ill? Yes

Are you physically ill? Yes, chronic illness

What is the most expensive thing you have bought? A college education

Do you have a job? Yes

Are you in school? Yes

Are you a dropout? No

Are you in college? Grad school

Introvert or extrovert? Ambivert leaving towards introvert

What do you think when you look at your body? Usually I think I look pretty good unless I’m pms-ing or bloating/feel like I ate a lot

What have others said when they look at your body? You’re tiny

Do you have a particular song that you feel deeply? A few

Talk about a time in your life where you have felt most alive? Dancing onstage

Are you confident wearing a bikini? For the most part

Can you look people in the eyes while talking? Yes

Has anything terrible happened to you? I mean yeah but in the grand scheme of things, no

Has anything wonderful happened to you? Of course

Favorite part of your personality? I’m genuine, observant, respectful, generous and loyal

Least favorite part of your personality? I can be insecure, a little bit of a loner, get jealous, and withdraw if uncomfortable

Favorite part of your body? Abs

Least favorite part of your body? Inner thighs

Favorite quote? “The higher you soar the smaller you appear to those who can’t fly”

Do you have friendships with all genders? Yes

Do you have a good relationship with your father? Yes

Do you have a good relationship with your mother? Yes

Do you have a good relationship with your siblings? For the most part

Have you ever been hurt physically or mentally by a family member? Mentally, yes

Have you ever had a near death experience? I felt like I did when I passed out the other day, my life flashed before my eyes

Do you know anyone who has taken their own life? Not personally

Have you ever tried to take your own life? No

Biggest lie you have told? I really don’t know, probably something to do with ED

Do you follow any conspiracies? Nah

Do you believe in a New World Order? Nah

Do you respect your government and the way your country is run? Hell no

Is there currently any strife in your country? Yes

Have you ever been displaced within your country? No

Are your friendships healthy? Yes

Are you currently fighting with a friend? No

Are you jealous of a friend? Why? A little bc she has her life together, got a PhD and then her dream job, she’s getting married and her family is so awesome

Do you believe in the Illuminati? Nah

Do you think any celebrities are associated with the Illuminati? Who? No

How can people tell you are nervous? I fidget/shake my leg/tap my foot, twirl my hair, bite my fingers

How can people tell you are sad? I get extremely quiet and withdrawn and possibly cry

Do you ever express your true feelings? Sometimes

Regrets in your life? I try not to live with regret but there are a couple things

Achievements in your life? Graduated college, did AmeriCorps

What did people say about you in school? I was quiet

What did you say about people in school? Nothing ??

Is there something you have never told anyone? Yes

Have you committed an illegal act? I mean like driving over the speed limit and underage drinking

If you had two days to spend one million dollars how would you spend it? Buy a house, rescue dogs, plan a vacation, give some to family

What were your aspirations at age 5, 10, 15, 18? 5- probably a princess 😂, 10- a teacher, 15- a dancer, 18- not sure at all but went to college

Describe your first kiss? Was it how you imagined? It was at the beach at night with a guy I thought was so hot and had a huge crush on. It was honestly amazing I couldn’t have asked for a better first kiss

Growing up were you in a wealthy, average, or low income household? Average

Are you from a broken marriage? Nope

Have you been raised by a solo parent? Nope

Do you know both your parents? Yes

What colour eyes, hair and skin do you have? Hazel/brown, blonde, pale

Have you abused drugs or alcohol? A lil but not to an extreme where I have gone to rehab

What languages can you speak? English, un peu francais and italiano

Do you conform to your societies standards? In most ways yes I guess

Do you cry often? If something happens

Do you tell people what you think of them? If I like them yes, if not I keep that to my self

Are you comfortable accepting compliments? Yeah

Are you comfortable giving compliments? Yup

Is any mental illness hindering your life? Kinda yeah

Is any physical illness hindering your life? Nah not really

Do you keep up with current events? For the most part

What’s the latest news in the world you have heard/read? Impeachment

What have you done today? Gone to work, try to tie up loose ends with a new internship, my financial aid, and a job schedule

Do you sleep well? Generally yes

Do you sleep badly? Maybe once in a while

Have you ever hurt anyone because you were hurting? Probably

Has anyone ever hurt you because they were hurting? Yes

Have you ever had to end a friendship/relationship? Why? Yes an relationship bc we were growing apart

Have you ever stopped someone from hurting themselves? I think so

Has anyone ever stopped you from hurting yourself? Yes

Do you like your laugh? Usually yes unless I snort haha

Are you preparing for an apocalypse? And what kind? Uh no

Do you have any funny family stories? Um TONS

Are you religious? Not really

Do you like to watch true crime shows or movies? Sometimes

Are you interested in cults? No

Would you like to raise a family in your country? I mean I probably will but not really

List some things you wanted in your childhood but never got? To be a professional dancer or a teacher

Is there a large age gap between you and a sibling? A decent one 5.5 years

Are you from a blended family? No

Do you believe in marriage? Why/Why not? I personally do bc I like the commitment but I have lost some faith in the idea bc of the amount of cheating and stuff I see in marriages

What is the nicest thing anyone has said to you? I wish everyone was as nice as you

Do you keep a journal? I used to

Would anyone be hurt by reading it? Maybe a little

Do you have children? No

Have you been pregnant? No

List your favorite movies? Remember the Titans, the lion king

List your favorite people? I mean like my family and close friends

Talk about the birthmarks and scars on your body? I have a bunch of scars just from falling as a kid and I have a birthmark on my inner thigh

Do you look after yourself? Yeah

Do you put yourself or others first? Depends on the situation

Are you happy today? Eh

Are you loved? Yeah

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doomedandstoned · 5 years

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On Bands Embracing New Social Media Platforms

~Bacon's Blog~

Photographs by Rita Fevraleva

☿

So this is one that you probably aren’t going to like reading, since I’m not especially stoked to be writing it. But here we are. One of the fundamental truths of marketing your band in 2019 is the fact that you need to be first to market on stuff. This is for a variety of reasons, so get ready, because we’re going to dive fairly deep into all of them.

Now I get it, this is a pretty conservative audience. Not in a political sense, obviously, but some of you are slow movers. I am a slow mover. It took me way too long to take Instagram seriously. However, now I've been asked to give a keynote in Norway because I was able to figure it out. I don’t want to make the mistake of being slow to adopt new social media platforms again, and I don’t want your band to make the same mistake I did. This is a struggle we’re all going to face every few years in the digital age. We saw it happen first with Myspace, then with Facebook. There are new platforms starting to shake things up -- most notably TikTok -- that I think you need to start being aware of, because they just might end up blowing up.

In a world where we are starting to feel the heat on Instagram, as the organic reach of that vaunted platform continues to die, it seems like Zuckerberg & Co. might not actually have the next big social media platform. A lot of influential people are starting to say that, in fact, TikTok might be that platform. Yes, at the moment it’s basically a platform for kids doing silly videos with filters, but it has HUGE functionality, way above and beyond that of Instagram.

Think about the people on Instagram who were there from the get-go, who have a disproportionate following relative to how big their band actually is just because they gave it a shot back in 2014 when the platform had just started to get traction. On some fundamental level, we need to be aware of this stuff. Now, yes, you can still get a lot of traction out of those more established platforms today, but do you think that will be the case in five years? I doubt it.

Of course, I already hear someone arguing that they don’t want to do it because, "What if it dies the way Snapchat did?" Well, first of all, Snapchat didn’t die -- it still has 188 million daily active users. It’s just that their market isn’t one that is relevant anymore to many people in our demographic. That being said, it still has a fighting chance, and it still might break through.

TikTok is currently blowing up, to circle back to that example, and I could see it being highly influential. One of its major selling points is its direct integration with Instagram and Facebook. So worst case scenario you just have some cool new filters. Sure, that sounds silly, but to be honest, the filters on TikTok are way better than those on Instagram -- just saying. But again – this isn’t all about TikTok. When you’re first to market somewhere, you’ll meet all the other cool people trying to dig in to see if this cool new thing can help them. So the odds are that at a minimum, you’ll meet some other highly motivated bands trying to do cool things.

Furthermore, in this worst case scenario where in a year TikTok still hasn’t gotten traction, at least you got a chance to understand the zeitgeist. Snapchat may be losing market share, but it still inspired Instagram stories, a key feature in 2019. You can look at what young and digitally savvy creators are doing, and then emulate their approaches to things. You only learn by mimicking the people who do it best, especially when it comes to social media. You can only read so many articles before you have to see things put into practice.

I am extremely new to TikTok -- I literally made my first post right before writing this -- but I already see myself consuming new content that might open new doors for me and give me new ideas for how I want to push my Instagram strategy in the future. If you can get a grasp of where the zeitgeist is at, you’re ahead of a lot of other people who don’t even bother. I know that sounds nerdy, but as creators you need to understand the culture, the milieu in which you are creating.

I truly get it. Some of y’all aren’t even on Instagram. You don’t want to deal with a new social platform. These platforms like TikTok and Snapchat don’t have a real audience for your type of music yet. But the thing is, there’s a fuckload of people on there and there’s a lot of things you could be experimenting with. I know it sounds highfalutin’ and crazy, but I think if you missed the boat on Instagram, you probably realize now how big a mistake that was. So if you can do your best to not miss the boat on TikTok, then you’re probably going to be able to make up for lost time.

Yes, it’s more content, yes, it’s more time, but it’s worth a shot. If you really are as dedicated to growing your band as you claim, then it might be something worth looking into. I’m not saying you’ve got to dedicate hours to it, but if a fucking trained ape like me can figure out how to do something on it, then maybe fire up an account yourself and see what happens.

Weird Things by Pressor

So, I guess the takeaway is to understand the value of making the time to experiment if you want to understand how best to take advantage of the cultural landscape we live in. Take the time to see if there is something of value that you can learn from new platforms. Social media is not an easy game, and I know it sucks to have to get in first on something that might not pan out. But again, if it does pan out then you could be a big winner. If it doesn’t pan out, then at least you learned something about the future of social media and how it works.

I’m all about trying to learn and better myself. If you are reading this article, then the odds are that you are too. Take this journey with me, figure out how things work and how we learn. I guess what I’m trying to say is: follow me on TikTok (@mattbacon666).

Matt Bacon (IG: mattbacon666) with Dropout Media is a consultant, A&R man, and journalist specializing in the world of heavy metal. Matt also co-hosts the Dumb & Dumbest podcast with Curtis Dewar of Dewar PR.

#Bacon's Blog #Matt Bacon #Dropout Media #Advice #Eyehategod #Pressor #Doom #Sludge #Metal #Doom Metal #Stoner Rock #Doomed & Stoned

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sweetness-doesnt-touch-my-face · 5 years

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Thank You - Eve of Tumblr Purge.

I created this blog in 2013. I only began to start actively using it in 2014. I was freshly 15 years old. I had just discovered my first rock n roll band. INXS. Back then, I was known as “freedom-take-me-deeper” then by late 2015 during my massive Queen obsession I changed my name to “the-white-lili-queen-walks” In 2016 when I was infected of Bowie, I evolved yet again into “wild-eyed-poet-from-freecloud” by the end of that year, I formed into “msladymidnight”

I had been in and out of multiple fandoms by this point but my presence wasn’t that well known. I was kinda like the kid at the back of the classroom just quietly enjoying the music rather than adding to the chatter of discussion. But that all changed in March of 2017. I discovered Alice in Chains and I can safely say that my life changed forever in ways that I could never have expected.

It was then that I became the name I am now. The one which I’d say still suits me best in this phase of my life. “sweetness-doesnt-touch-my-face” and my header title remains as the “Queen of Sap” What can I say? I love Got Me Wrong and I love the EP and I just so happen to be a sappy motherfucker, aha.

It was in this time that I finally felt like I had found a home. My solace. My eternal muse. I also had unknowingly gained the most receptive and supportive audience that I’ve ever had the blessed privilege of having. I never in a million years would have guessed that the grunge and metal community would be the place where my poetry would thrive to extreme and unbelievable heights.

I first began to share my poems on here back in January of 2016 when I was touched by the immense grief of one of my dearest friends who is a devoted Bowie fan. I wrote a poem about it and found the confidence to post it on here. And the rest was history. People responded well to the personal poems that I continued to post from then on. But it wasn’t until 2017 that it skyrocketed.

I cannot begin to express how much it means to me. Every like, every reblog, every tag, every private message, every anon, every ask. Believe it or not, I remember every single word. Your compliments and comments will stick with me for life. The fact that you so strongly supported a dropout teenage girl from the country side of Australia. That you believed in me and my work so sincerely.

Fuck. I’m gonna cry, aha. It was in May of 2017 that grief hit close to home with me again with the passing of Chris Cornell. I wrote an emotional poem and there wasn’t a thought in my mind that it would resonate with so many fans. Thanks to you - I gained the courage yet again to send it to an online newspaper in Seattle. And it ended up being my first publication ever - anywhere in this world.

That was one of the most happiest bitter-sweet days of my life. I got to share it with everybody who believed in me and my words. Sure, I wrote ‘em. But you guys were the ones that brought them to life. You gave me my voice. And I’m so incredibly thankful and grateful for all of the love and support that I’ve received with every poem I’ve ever posted, along with my newly released songs.

You are my first real audience, and you’ll be one that I’ll miss with all my heart if I should go or should this place crumble into nothingness. I grew up on this website. I spent my teenage years on this website. I spent five good years on this website. Two of them were spent completely doped up. For those that have stayed and stuck with me throughout all the hellish periods of my life. The times when I was most ugly and the most unlovable. Thank you for tolerating me.

Thank you for the prayers, the well wishes, the dozens upon dozens of people that shared their personal stories or gave me messages of hope or words of kindness all throughout the years when I was at my despaired worst. All those people. The most beautiful side of humanity that I so desperately had to see with my own eyes. Thank you. I wish I could hug every single one of you.

I’ve met so many important people on this website that will stay with me for the rest of my life. I met some of the greatest friends I’ve ever had in my life on here. Sure, most of them are gone. But the acquaintances and lovely strangers made up for it. I met my first love on here. I’ve loved and I’ve lost. So many experiences that made me who I am today. I won’t forget them.

At 15 years old, I had no idea of the life that was ahead of me. So much has happened. I found my passion. I became a poet. I had a life-sucking illness. I fell into addiction. I was diagnosed with OCD, social/anxiety and bipolar disorder. I discovered so many of my idols and people that I’m so grateful to have to look up to as not only artists that I adore and admire but as my pillars of strength.

All that the rock community has given me. The relationships and friendships that were formed. The overall bonding of love and appreciation for music. The conversations that lasted for hours. The angels and the demons. The gift of being able to share art that made people feel something with overwhelming emotion. It has been my absolute honour to write for you, to share my pain, to share my little bouts of happiness, to share my fucked up life, aha.

Thank you for reading anything that I’ve had to say, past and present.

Your support has forever humbled me. You made me the poet that I am.

So thank you, forever and always - from the bottom of my heart. I will never forget this integral and wild ride that has been my life of the past five years.

My gratitude is eternal.

Sincerely Yours,

Liliana.

#I love you all.#p.s. fuck you tumblr.

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pulsarsmash · 6 years

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PULSAR’S TOP 10 FAVORITE ANIME OF 2017

PULSAR'S TOP 10 ANIME OF 2017:

Its that time again! Here's my ten favorite anime series of the past year. A few notes:

1. This is just one dude's opinion. If your favorite isn't on here, it's not personal.

2. I decided to include sequel series on this list after a few years of not doing that, because there were a couple this year that were so good I felt not including them would be unfair.

3. If I didnt finish a show, its not on here. Meaning there are a couple shows like Inuyashiki and Juni Taisen that, while I've liked what I've seen, aren't on this list.

Here we go!

#10: GABRIEL DROPOUT A consistently funny comedy about an angel who, after graduating from angel school and being assigned to Earth, discovers video games and ends up becoming a lazy bum. Meanwhile, her best friend, a demon fresh out of demon school, has the opposite problem: she's far too sweet and kind to be an effective agent of evil. This show is a lot of fun and features a couple great supporting characters (a demon with serious delusions of grandeur and an angel with a sadistic streak). If youre looking for some laughs, this is a great show to check out!

GABRIEL DROPOUT is available on Crunchyroll.

#9: KONOSUBA - SEASON 2

Imagine the gang on Its Always Sunny In Philadelphia launching a Dungeons & Dragons campaign. It would probably end up something like Konosuba.

I didn't think this show could top last season in ridiculousness and hilarity, but it pulled it off. This is one of those shows where your sides hurt by the end of some episodes because you've been laughing so hard.

If you aren't familiar with Konosuba, it revolves around a group of four would-be adventurers: Kazuma, a neurotic and slightly perverted NEET; Aqua, an incompetent crybaby goddess and healer; Megumin, a mentally unstable mage obsessed with blowing things up; and Darkness, a masochistic knight. These four are complete idiots and manage to screw up just about everything they try to accomplish... and you'll end up loving them because of it. Watch this one from the beginning if youre looking for a great comedy and like seeing the "sent to a fantasy world" trope completely turned on its head. Seasons 1 and 2 of KONOSUBA are available on Crunchyroll.

#8: PRINCESS PRINCIPAL

This show was 2017's dark horse, it seemed to fly under a lot of peoples radar. Which is a shame, because this is a very fun and inventive spy/intrigue series. Princess Principal takes place in an alternate version of Britain which has been split in two by war. A group of young women double as spies for the upstart commonwealth who are trying to unseat the monarchy. And their secret weapon? The country's own princess, who is in on the scheme. With awesome steampunk-inspired character designs, great action sequences and a story with continuous twists and turns that will keep you guessing, this show definitely deserves a second look from people who may have missed out the first time. Princess Principal is available on Amazon Prime.

#7: KAKEGURUI KAKEGURUI is another show that flew under people's radar in 2017, largely because Netflix decided to wait until the English dub was finished to release it in the US. But I can tell you it was worth the wait. This anime follows a young woman named Yumeko who transfers into an elite prep school in Japan, where the student hierarchy is determined through gambling. Yumeko quickly finds herself a target of the student council when it turns out that not only is she a VERY skilled gambler, she is also very good at figuring out if someone is cheating. And she may or may not be a tad bit insane. If you like over-the-top psychologically-intense shows like Prison School, you are going to love this anime. It also has my favorite intro of any anime in 2017. KAKEGURUI is available on Netflix in English and Japanese starting this month!

#6: SCUM'S WISH Most romance anime are very light and fun, or they are over the top to the point of self-parody. SCUM'S WISH is not one of those anime. This show is about how painful and unfair love can be. Two high school students appear to everyone to be a perfect couple. But the truth is they are both actually in love with other people (their teachers), and are simply using each other as a physical and emotional replacement. The characters in this show are not tropes, and they aren't necessarily all likeable either. One character I would almost call the best villain of the entire year in anime. But in the end, this show makes you care about all of them, to the point where you even want the worst of them to be happy in the end. Scums Wish is not a fun show. In fact, it is incredibly painful to watch at times. But it is absolutely worth watching. SCUM'S WISH is available on Amazon Prime.

#5: THE ANCIENT MAGUS' BRIDE A young woman named Chise is about to commit suicide when she is approached by a man offering to help her "find someone who wants her." Feeling that she has nothing left to live for, she offers herself up for auction, and is purchased for five million pounds by a mysterious individual who turns out to be an ancient mage. And he has selected Chise to be his apprentice... and his future bride. The Ancient Magus' Bride is an absolutely BEAUTIFUL show. There is a sense of magic and wonder to this anime that just draws you in from the opening episode and doesn't let go. And the relationship between Chise and Elias is fascinating. This show will likely top a LOT of people's best-of lists, and I absolutely understand why. The only reason its not higher on my list is it's only 13 episodes in, and there's a lot of story left to tell. I can't wait! THE ANCIENT MAGUS' BRIDE is available on Crunchyroll (subtitled) and Funimation (English dub)

#4: MISS KOBAYASHI'S DRAGON MAID A techie gets drunk one night, misses her train stop and ends up on the outskirts of town. She comes across a dragon, and being drunk, makes friends with her invites her to stay with her. She proceeds to go home, pass out and forget everything... until the dragon shows up on her doorstep the next morning, dressed as maid and ready to get to work. This for me was the biggest surprise of 2017. I went into this show expecting to drop it after an episode or 2, and ended up falling in love with its cast of hilarious and ridiculous characters. The relationship between Kobayashi and Tohru the dragon (which becomes more romantic over time) is absolutely adorable, and the supporting characters/dragons are all a ton of fun to watch. This is one of those series that just makes you feel good while watching it. Definitely give this one a shot! MISS KOBAYASHI'S DRAGON MAID is available on Crunchyroll (subtitled) and Funimation (English dub)

#3: ATTACK ON TITAN: Season 2 Attack On Titan, a show about a world where titans (giant humanoid creatures) threaten humanity's existence and have forced them into a giant walled city, is one of the most popular anime series of the past decade. After a four long wait, expectations for this season were impossibly high. Well, I'm just going to say it: Season 2 of Attack On Titan made Season 1 look like a kids show by comparison. This season ramped up the intensity and sheer terror to 11. Attack On Titan, in my opinion, is no longer a shonen-action series. It's straight up HORROR. And this is a good thing. The best thing about this season was the decision to split up the main trio of Eren, Armin and Mikasa and focus more on supporting characters like Sasha, Ymir and Krista. Ymir in particular went from being a background character to becoming the heart of the show, with her tragic arc being the center of the season's conflict. Fortunately, AoT fans won't have to wait much longer for Season 3, as it will be coming out this year! ATTACK ON TITAN Season 2 is available on Crunchyroll (subtitled) and Funimation (English dub). Season 1 is also available on Netflix and Hulu

#2: LITTLE WITCH ACADEMIA Originally a crowdfunded OVA, and then a sequel, Studio Trigger's LITTLE WITCH ACADEMIA finally received a full season this year, and it was absolutely worth the wait. This is an extremely fun and entertaining series about a school for young witches and a group of new students who have joined, including a young girl named Akko from Japan who loves magic, but doesn't appear to have much natural ability... until she discovers a magic wand that once belonged to a legendary witch named Shiny Chariot. Akko is instantly likeable and you will find yourself cheering her and her friends on even as they make obvious mistakes and get themselves into ridiculous amounts of trouble along the way. Her dorm-mate Sucy (who has a serious obsession with potions and isn't afraid to use her friends as guinea pigs for her experiments) damn near steals the show. And its a Studio Trigger show, so you know the animation is going to not only be great but exciting to watch, and that's definitely the case here. The show wisely takes an episodic approach for the first half, with the overall story arc coming into play in the second half of the series. LITTLE WITCH ACADEMIA is not just one of the best anime of the year, it's one of my favorites of the past decade. LITTLE WITCH ACADEMIA is available on Netflix in both Japanese and English.

#1: MADE IN ABYSS

I agonized for a while over whether to make this or Little Witch Academia #1. If you were to ask which show is more fun to watch, Little Witch wins by a landslide. But Made In Abyss is the show that simply would not let me go this year.

In a world where a mysterious chasm has opened up in the center of the earth, cave raiders delve into the depths of The Abyss, as its known, seeking out secrets and treasure of the world below. A young aspiring cave raider named Riko one day receives a letter from her mother, a famous cave raider who has been missing for years, telling her to meet her at the bottom. With the help of her new friend Reg (a human-looking robot Riko found while scavenging), Riko begins a treacherous journey to the bottom of the world.

MADE IN ABYSS is a throwback in some ways to the dark fantasy epics of the 1980s like The Neverending Story. But this series ramps up the darker elements of its story over time. Do not let the cute art fool you: this is NOT a kids show. This show goes places I never expected, and in some cases places I would never want to go back to again. This show never feels "safe" the way kids' shows are expected to. The central characters are always in danger, and one false move could get them killed... or worse. There are times where I had to pause this show in the middle of an episode just to decompress because I felt like I was about to break down.

Prepare to be terrified. Prepare to be heartbroken. And prepare to see the best anime of 2017.

MADE IN ABYSS is available on Amazon Prime.

Thanks for checking out my list. Let me know what your favorite anime series of 2017 were!

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miraculousagentsofkrypton · 6 years

Note

I would assume you're a big fan of AoS and Supergirl. But which character on each show is your fave and why?

You guessed right! :P Sorry for the delay, I wanted to find the time to answer this properly, this is just my stream of conscience though and doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface.

Great question! Ok, so my favs are definitely Daisy Johnson and Kara Zor-El Danvers, but I love pretty much all the characters on both shows. I recently did a post on Daisy’s birthday about my favorite scenes in season 1. A lot of those scenes are what started my love of her.

Both of these wonderful characters have been through so much of what the universe has to offer. They have suffered and suffered. Kara lost her whole world and Daisy never even found one to be part of. She got thrown from foster home to foster home, the protocol never allowing her to stay anywhere for even a year. Kara was an alien, hiding who she was, knowing that if she were revealed both her new family and herself would be in danger. Neither of them were ever accepted by the world, outcasts to their very souls.

They had a right to be angry, to rage, but you know what they did? They took those experiences and learned to love the world. They developed a sense of empathy beyond compare. Both of them love deeply, they love total strangers, they care about even their enemies. Do you realize how rare and precious that is?

Daisy found a way to understand Ward despite everything and she empathized with and tried to help Ruby. She became a Rising Tide hacktivist because it was her way of helping the underdog, helping the world become a better place. That was something, someway she was capable of influencing the world and she took it. When Coulson offered her a chance to make a bigger difference with SHIELD, she jumped on it. She learned what their purpose was and wholeheartedly worked to become a part of it. One of my favorite scenes in season 1 is when Daisy talks to Hannah. She has nothing in common with this lady. She doesn’t have the same beliefs, yet she forges a bond with her, finds a way to use her painful history to connect, and help comfort her.

Kara is unwilling to kill anyone, even the worst people imaginable.(inconsistency issues with the Martians and Non aside) She always, always tries to get through to the person before fighting them. She connects to them, tries to see the best in them. I will always love the scene in season 1 where she has no powers, but she still stops that robbery through her bravery and kindness. She sees each person in the city as a light, and whenever she helps someone, a little of that light becomes a part of her. She remembers the face of every single person she has saved; her super-heroism has absolutely nothing to do with pride, arrogance, or thinking that humans need saving, its just pure love.

Then there’s their overwhelming love for those clostest to them. They created their own families when they had no one to turn too, and they devoted themselves to them. Kara would do anything for any of the superfam. She gave up her powers entirely, for years to protect Alex. She gave up the one thing that she thought would make her feel more normal, and only changed that in order to save Alex. Daisy barely knew the team before she was willing to do anything for them, she gave up opportunities to fulfill her lifelong goal of finding her family. They both risk their life time and time again to protect them.

They are both so self-sacrificing and honestly self-depricating. Daisy gets told time and time again that death follows her. This idea haunts her so much. When HIVE happened, she wouldn’t allow herself to be comforted, the very idea of having hurt, and attempted to kill her family destroyed her, and she wouldn’t accept that it wasn’t her fault. She left the team, when she could have used the most help, because she wanted to protect them. She allows all the blame to fall on herself for so many things that are out of her control, and rarely places it on someone else. She was willing to sacrifice it all when she believed that she was the destroyer of worlds, to stay in a decimated future, to give up her powers she worked so hard to accept and control, to give up her life for everyone else. She doesn’t want to be the leader, even though she makes a brilliant one because sometimes she struggles to see and accept other peoples love and care for her. She denies the possibility of their trust because she doesn’t trust herself.

Kara suffers from survivers guilt. She feels the weight of millions of lives on her shoulders. She failed in her purpose of protecting and teaching Kal-El, and she feels that blame, even if not of that is her fault. She fell under the effects of Red-Kryptonite, and similar to Daisy, she hurt those she loved and tried to kill her sister. It didn’t matter that she wasn’t really the one to blame. She feels the blame for every injury or death around her. Kara puts so much pressure on herself to be perfect and feels like she’s weak if she isn’t. She couldn’t handle the idea of still suffering from her childhood trauma in “Triggers”, having claustrophobia was a sign that she had failed somewhere.

Their coping mechanisms are similar as well. Daisy hides behind humour, when she’s scared or unsure, she turns to sarcasm, to jokes. She holds her feelings in, bottles them up, and doesn’t allow others to really see how she’s truly feeling. This is both to protect herself and to protect the other person. She doesn’t want to become a burden, so she avoids her feelings and issues. Kara has an entire persona to hide behind. Kara Danvers is a happy, innocent girl. Kara hides behind that idea, even when she isn’t pretending to be a normal human, even when in the presence of family. She can laugh and smile even when she’s dying inside. She pushes the idea of weakness away, ultimately forcing herself into denial. Sometimes she is so good at pretending that everything is a-ok that she fools even those closest to her, sometimes they almost forget she’s an alien from a fallen world.

Not everything about them is so heavy. Daisy is always ready to be geeky with Fitzsimmons, watching Paranormal movies, or Doctor Who. She’s the biggest shipper of all the romances. She’s so amazingly clever, but I don’t think she always recognizes that, especially with the high school dropout thing always weighing on it. She may or may not be book smart, but she is definitely street smart, she picks apart and recognizes patterns really well. She has few possessions that she has kept through the years, but one thing that has always stayed with her is a hula girl. Daisy always falls for the broken guy, the one with issues that she can help, because she never stops being a hero, even in her romance. She lived in a van in an alley way for years, by choice. She loves Phil Coulson and Melinda May like parents, but she still loved her parents despite their many issues and flaws and wanted what was best for them. She has learned to accept her differences, because sometimes being different can mean making a difference.

Kara is an artist, she probably uses it in a therapeutic way and to capture her memories to preserve them, since she has no photographs. She adores food, and gorges herself on pizza and pot-stickers. Chocolate Pecan Pie is apparently the best in the galaxy according to her. N'sync is her favorite band and she uses phrases like golly gee adorably. She’s good a Settlers of Catan and connects with kids really well. She initiates game nights and gets really competitive. She’s a genius on Kryptonian levels who learned calculus at age four, but had to leave it behind when she came to earth. She doesn’t understand or like Earth history. She’s horrible at spelling in English, but writes for a living. She’s not genuinely clumsy and will never feel normal, except when she’s with her sister, because the Danvers sisters? They should come with a warning.

#supergirl #aos #daisy johnson #kara danvers #kara zor el #i love them so freaking much #this doesn't even scratch the surface #agents of shield #rae answers #long post

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thesinglesjukebox · 6 years

Video

youtube

CHANCE THE RAPPER - I MIGHT NEED SECURITY

[4.64]

And we might need a better song.

Will Rivitz: Even two full years after its release, I still struggle with just how monumental a step back Coloring Book was for Chance The Rapper's artistic evolution. How could the man who characterized the convolutions and uncertainties of young adulthood so adroitly and poetically set all of those poignant observations aside in favor of an uncritical appreciation of the glories of fatherhood and a shallow nostalgia for how things used to be? I guess what got me was the album's unprecedented change of attitude: I would never in a million years have guessed that Acid Rap's nuanced self-criticism could have morphed into a Disneyfied version of itself not even three years later. In that regard, at least "I Might Need Security" does indeed have a precedent: this is the narcissistic and toxically insecure Chance we've all gotten to know since 2016. "I ain't no activist, I'm the protagonist" is consistent with the Chance who, when a poem he wrote for NPR's Tiny Desk last year was interrupted by the sound of an elevator, started again from the beginning, because the idea of continuing where he left off would have been inconceivable. "I donate to the schools next, they call me a deadbeat daddy" is consistent with the Chance who slid into a Twitter rando's DMs to tell them to "get off [his] dick" because the user had the nerve to say Chance's proposal to his baby mama may have come a few years too late to generate goodwill. "I'll make you fix your words like a typo suggestion / Pat me on the back too hard and Pat'll ask for your job" is consistent with the Chance who made MTV remove a review critical of Coloring Book because it wasn't well-suited to his tastes. (The review, which sums up my thoughts on the album better than most anything else I've seen, was reposted by the author on his Medium page.) At least he's being honest here. [2]

Maxwell Cavaseno: Interesting thing about Chance the Rapper's debut mixtape 10 Day: It wasn't good, it was fine. Besides songs like "Juke Juke" in which you could sort of see his more manic tendencies emerging, a lot of Chance's earliest material was mealy mouthed rappity rap that was adequate but ultimately boring. It's why Acid Rap, where he did find his voice, was so much more rightfully received and recognized. While Chance's excesses and tics have now become downright aggravating, it made sense that he went in that direction because as a straight rapper there's just nothing compelling to his plain lyrics and delivery. Apparently, you might need proof as well, and lucky for us Chance decided to provide such. [2]

Ryo Miyauchi: The Jamie Foxx sample is the only redeemable thing here with Chance throwing random fake-deep rhymes to a piano-led beat that vaguely channels The College Dropout in feel. It's a life update as a stopgap release between his album presumably in the works, and yet another reminder that Chance has been a hero to Chicago since Coloring Book. It's an exhausting point he keeps on reiterating. Will he lighten his sense of self-importance if we erect that statue he so craves to be built? [5]

Julian Axelrod: Chance's nice guy phase was never going to last. You can't be that rich and that famous for that long without a few compromises and some dirty laundry, and the distinctly Obama-era rap star has had a decidedly post-2016 descent. The Noname collabs gave way to DJ Khaled features; the label aversion morphed into Apple Music kowtowing; the social media savvy proved ineffectual in the face of fan criticism. So "I Might Need Security" presents a new Chance: bitter, prickly, his grin warped into an wary smirk. Luckily, this Chance is still a hell of a rapper, and even in the midst of a 45 degree heel turn he's bubbly enough to spit over a cheeky Jamie Foxx sample that makes no bones about his beef. I might actually like Chance 2.0 better than the original; he looks good with his back against the ropes and some dirt under his nails. But I'm predisposed to like any song that big ups Verne Troyer and clowns Rahm Emanuel, so take my opinion with a grain of celery salt. [7]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: A mixed bag, just like everything Chance has done since mid-2016. Points in its favor: Chance announcing that he bought a news site in the second verse of a loosie, "I'm only 25 but I'm Motown 25," calling for Rahm to resign. Points against: all the woe is me, heavy is the crown shit, the Verne Troyer pun, half of his punchlines in general. And yet "I Might Need Security" still works, in spite of itself-- maybe it's just the Jamie Foxx sample, but Chance is channeling mid-2000s Kanye here at his most maddeningly likeable. [6]

Vikram Joseph: An airing of grievances and a settling of scores (some of them on a widescreen, political scale, and some which need Infinite Jest-level footnoting to comprehend), juxtaposed with Chance's laconic flow and a hazy, sun-bleached beat which almost drifts into "Drinking in L.A." at one point. The dreamy "fuck you" hook serves as microcosm for the song - there's anger here, but it's so palatable. [8]

Ian Mathers: Some of the content here is good, even possibly important. But I don't remember Chance sounding this outright halting in places before, and that sample really sounded like such a good idea they're just going to let it have the last 45 seconds of the track, huh? [3]

Alfred Soto: He's twenty-five ("Motown twenty-five"), expects to see a statue in his honor, and samples a Jamie Foxx routine's "fuck you." Relative to his modest talents, his ego annoys the hell out of me but not as much as his irregularly deployed sing-song: he can't decide whether to cram too many syllables per line or speak-sing the leaden moments. His good intentions scare me most. [4]

Stephen Eisermann: The problem with Chance is his commitment to telling us he's a good guy - the protagonist, even - without doing any of the work. He continues doing the same here, and even though he makes some good points while calling out some bad players (with shaky wordplay, at best), his lack of self-awareness is nearly as hard to swallow as his pride. [4]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: The cover of this single is a rendering of the Arthur's fist meme and the song is held together by a chipmunk'd Jamie Foxx sample. These things make "I Might Need Security" a smart PR move of a song: there's a clear link made between his happy-go-lucky personality and what's present here. He sounds more self-conscious than ever, well-worn to the point of actual aggression. When he finally takes the sample's lead and declares "fuck you," it's clear that he doesn't want it to read as anything other than acerbic. While this may sculpt a more complete image of who Chance is, it unfortunately sounds more labored over and tedious than the majority of his catalogue. Hearing Chance's straightforward talk-rapping recalls his poetry slam past--especially since it's coupled with a beat as static as this--and it doesn't particularly play to his strengths. As listeners, we're asked to primarily revel in the lyrics. When I do, it sounds like a whole lot of boring whining. Which begs the question, why would I want to listen to this? [2]

Nortey Dowuona: Smooth, chipmunk curse coos echo in the back as they hit the slack, soft drums, as purring, bulging bass then drizzling. Deep piano is lathered over as Chance snarls thin threats that bulge out of the cotton candy wool of the production. [8]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

#Chance the Rapper #music #new music #rap #hip-hop #music writing #music reviews

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douchebagbrainwaves · 3 years

Text

OK, I'LL TELL YOU YOU ABOUT TECHNIQUE

Because I'd rather offend people than pander to them, and IBM could easily have gotten an operating system elsewhere. It's technique. But these are equivalent to money; the proof is that investors are willing if forced to treat them as interchangeable, granting the same status to sweat equity and the equity they've purchased with cash. If you write the laws very carefully, that is. Here is a brief sketch of the economic proposition. Remember, the original motivation for HN was to test a new programming language, and moreover one that's focused on experimenting with language design, not performance. It's what a startup is thus as close as most people can get to saying to one's boss, I want to work for the Post Office for fifty years.

Technology that's valuable today could be worthless in a couple years. I wanted to make enough money that I didn't have to. Unfortunately, companies can't pay everyone like salesmen. Stuff has gotten a lot richer. An experienced programmer would be more likely to notice and complain. If one likes you, you become a member of this new group. Until a few centuries ago, the main sources of wealth were mines, slaves and serfs, land, and cattle, and the site rules discourage dramatic link titles. Up to a point it would be more fun. If you make something and people complain that you're unqualified, or that you've done something inappropriate. How do you get bought? They never had to bet the company on a bold decision. And indeed, the lumpy ashtrays we made for our parents did not have much of a larger share that what's left over for the rest of your life you devote to your work.

They were at the time a pair of college dropouts with about three years of school between them, and that can probably only increase your earnings by a factor of two or three. This was the era of those fluffy idealized portraits of countesses with their lapdogs. The techniques for dealing with links have to evolve, because the main value of that initial version is not the hope of becoming much richer than anyone else, it will seem low to others. Which meant, with current US tax rates, that it made sense to invest in it, the way to persuade people is not just one thing. Taking money from the rich. The theory is that minor forms of bad behavior encourage worse ones: that a neighborhood with lots of graffiti and broken windows becomes one where robberies occur. Many innovations consist of replacing something with a small group working on a hard technical problem. In 1976, everyone looked down on a company operating out of a garage in Silicon Valley don't seem to be a rule with them that everything has to start with statistics. A bet with only a few years old. It was the value I derived from it. Big companies can develop technology that's simply too hard for competitors to duplicate, you don't need to join a company to do that.

It's easy to measure how much revenue they generate, and they're worried about some nit like not having proper business cards. But more importantly, if you can believe that. There is a lot of them, but though they can end up in the company and went to work for ordinary salaries, but more mundane technologies like light bulbs or semiconductors have to be small? There is a large random multiplier in the success of a startup as an optimization problem in which performance is measured by number of users. Naturally wealth had a bad reputation. You may not even be aware you're doing something people want. The word try is an especially valuable component. Whatever the cause, stupid comments tend to be short. It's that it tends not to happen at all. If you're a good hacker in your mid twenties, you can compete with specialization by working on larger horizontal slices—by both writing and illustrating your book, for example, by going to work for the Post Office for fifty years. Of the remainder, the smart ones would refuse such a job, as if the important thing, why does everyone talk about making money?

Because I'd rather offend people than pander to them, we had to keep going. That's where you'll find the juiciest projects still undone, either because they seemed too risky, or simply because there were too few insiders to explore everything. So in the future, and the people running the test really care about its integrity. This pays especially well in technology, you cook one thing and that's what everyone eats. When you hear people saying that, you're golden. A friend of mine cured herself of a clothes buying habit by asking herself before she bought anything Am I going to wear this all the time, she wouldn't buy it. Government. But only graduation rates, not how much students learn. When I notice something surprising, it's usually very faint at first. I've observed this in the wild.

In life, as in books, action is underrated. The most common types of fluff links are banned as off-topic. And the harder a scene is to parse, the less energy you have left for conscious thoughts. But I don't think it would be: you need to give someone a present and don't have any money, you make one. Take away the incentive of wealth, and in some kinds of work they can outweigh the advantages. They will have all the extra motivation that comes from being in a small group, and leverage from developing new techniques. In my nephews' rooms the bed is the only clear space. No one wants to do it: give money to the poor, or they could become irrelevant. The greatest is an audience. You have to justify.

If starting a startup were easy, everyone would do it. After all those years you get used to the idea of leaving a trail. Suppose new policies make it hard to make a million dollars, you have to tease apart the components. But if you try to attack this type of wealth through economic policy, it's hard to write a short comment that's distinguished for the amount of information it conveys, people try to distinguish them instead by being funny. Startups yield faster growth at greater risk than established companies. Saying pleased to meet you, whether you are or not. If you want to inhabit.

It won't have any adults. There's nothing dishonest about this. And he said that as a kid growing up in Saskatchewan he'd been amazed at the dedication Jobs and Wozniak were marginal people too. This pays especially well in technology, where you earn a premium for working fast. The disadvantage is that it tends to obscure what trade really means. It sounds a good deal to start a startup, I would have sought security by some other means: for example, the good china so many households have, and whose defining quality is not so much that they copy even their flaws. But this wasn't what made them eminent—it was more a flaw their eminence had allowed them to sink into. So have we just shown, by reductio ad absurdum, that it's false that economic inequality is the inevitable fate of countries that don't choose something worse. Unless you have some users to measure, you're optimizing based on guesses. Imagine walking around for years with five pound ankle weights, then suddenly having them removed. One reason they work on big things is that they interact with the ideas.

Thanks to Chris Anderson, Sarah Harlin, Sam Altman, Justin Kan, Patrick Collison, Fred Wilson, Guy Steele, and Trevor Blackwell for their feedback on these thoughts.

#automatically generated text #Markov chains #Paul Graham #Python #Patrick Mooney #programming #one #energy #pander #version #people

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karmies · 3 years

Text

Simple Wifi Profits Review (2021) - Just Another Scam?

It's quite rare that you see a course with such a scammy name like Simple Wifi Profits. This gets even more suspicious when you see another 2 teenagers who claim to be millionaires. To be honest, I saw this as a red flag, so I did what I usually do in this situation, meaning that I went ahead and bought it so that I can share my opinion with you guys. If you want to know if this course is the right choice for you, then you're in the right place! In this Simple Wifi Profits review, I'm gonna tell you everything you need to know in order to decide for yourself if this program is worth investing in. There will be some interesting aspects, which I would advise you to pay attention to and read until the end. Who Created Simple Wifi Profits? Chris Eom, a Korean immigrant and Andrew Wright, a college dropout are the creators of this course. They recently gained popularity in the affiliate marketing industry because they became millionaires in a short period of time ( like most gurus ). They provide their students with group coaching, as well as weekly coaching calls. Which is very useful if you ask me. If you are a beginner, you will find these calls highly useful. What is Simple Wifi Profits? Well, in a nutshell it's a program that teaches you how to promote products in the "health" niche by using paid traffic. It's really nothing out of the ordinary and this has been done before by many gurus. BUT the way that they teach you to structure your ads in order to get traffic to your offers is kinda new. Well at least I haven't seen it before. I can say that I liked it. There is also a downside to the method that they teach, which I will reveal later. Simple Wifi Profits Review As I said in the beginning, I decided to purchase this course because it seemed very scammy and I wanted to share my opinion with you guys. The second reason why I made this decision was that i saw many other respectable reviewers give it a thumbs up, and I wanted to see if they are lying. Let's have a look at what's inside of the course: Introduction Chris and Andrew start the course by reassuring you that you made the right decision by offering you a very cool bonus pack. Also, they tell you about the Facebook group, which I will highly recommend you to join. I can say that I liked the first few videos. 1st Chapter: The World Of Affiliate Marketing They start the course by outlining the key differences between affiliate marketing and other online business opportunities. I 100% agree with them when saying that affiliate marketing is THE BEST business model and will likely be for many years to come. If you are a beginner, you will like hearing the pros and cons of affiliate marketing based on Chris and Andrew's experience. Also, they will introduce you to Clickbank, an affiliate marketplace that you are probably already familiar with. They will recommend you to promote products in one particular field of the health niche, which we will talk about a bit later. 2nd Chapter: A Museum of a Million Dollar Success As you probably guessed (duh), they will tell you to promote products in the weight loss niche. Which is ... good. Weight Loss is a so called evergreen niche, meaning that there will always be people that will want to lose weight, as well as willing to spend money on it. This is the method that they used to become millionaires. They promoted weight loss products via paid ads. I was also successful in the past in the weight loss niche. The difference is that I used different methods to drive traffic to my offers. Chris and Andrew will introduce you to a 4 step system which is pretty straightforward: - Find a big problem that needs solving online. - Find a product: a solution to the problem. - Share the product via affiliate marketing. - Make sales and money. Such a complicated system, right? :) They will teach you how to use Facebook ads in order to get customers to your funnels. You will have access to all the landing pages needed inside the course. 3rd Chapter: The Invincible Bridge To Profit Chris and Andrew start this chapter by telling you to to use Clickfunnels in order to set up your landing pages. I like Clickfunnels because you can easily tell if your funnel is working or not. You will be able to see your conversion rate, therefore you will know if you need to change something in the funnel. If your funnel is not working, you will be able to insert additional files in the landing page (from inside the course). I really like this method because you are able to make money quickly, compared to something like SEO. 4th Chapter: Build Your Empire In this chapter, they will teach you how to build your actual Facebook ads. I told you in the beginning that this method is kinda unique and that I haven't seen it before. The uniqueness consists in the way the ad is created. It's based on providing VALUE, which quite frankly I haven't seen anywhere else in my 6 years of online marketing. I really like this method and I will continue to use it in the future. Again, everything you will need to know is thaught inside the course. You will not have any problems in making it work if you follow what they tell you. 5th Chapter: The Invictus SWP Empire Begins Here, Chris and Andrew get a bit more technical (don't worry, it's not very complicated). They will show you how to split test your ads in order to maximize the conversion rates. There were some things here that I didn't know. I really liked the texts and images that they provided. 6th Chapter: The Secrets Of Scaling To Mars This is where the fun begins! I tried these methods and they really work. I am always curious when I see scaling strategies inside affiliate marketing courses. Sometimes they are just filler in order to make the course longer. They will teach you how to start your campaigns with like $5-$10 and keep adding more everyday. So, you will be taught how to properly reinvest your profits in order to accelerate the growth of your business. I saw some people in the group making over $35.000/day. This was my favorite module from this course. 7th Chapter: Super Affiliate Hacks This is where you receive your bonuses. In my opinion, they were one of the best bonuses i saw in a course. Some of them teach you how to improve conversion rates, others how to scale quickly and efficiently. Also, the support is very good. I liked it. Simple Wifi Profits Pros - Very effective methods - You can get very quick results - Chris and Andrew are easy to understand - Easy for beginners - It just works Simple Wifi Profits Cons - It works best only with weight loss products - Only Facebook ads are thaught Is Simple Wifi Profits A Scam? While the name sounds scammy, Simple Wifi Profits is 100% NOT a scam. BUT unfortunately they don't tell you some things before you buy it. For example, this method works very well with weight loss products. If you try to promote other products from other niches, you might not be as profitable. If you are experienced, sure, you will not have problems with that. But if you are a beginner, you should stick to weight loss products. So keep that in mind. Conclusion I liked this course. I think it's the best for promoting weight loss products via Facebook ads. If you are fine with that niche, then go ahead and get the course. I personally like that niche and had a lot of success in it. As i said before, this is the best course for promoting weight loss products with FB ads. Read the full article

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