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vesora · 1 year

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is law of assumption real? yeah

i have come across an individual vilifying the loa community and i find their statements kinda funny and stupid but i love having my beliefs challenged bc i can know why i believe in this. please also read my response to this other girl who thought loa ppl were crazy. it is ok to think if it’s crazy. ur welcome to criticize it. also, i am using aesthetic pictures bc of my ocd, i need things to be divided.

this is for the people who want to listen whether LOA is real from MY perspective:

firstly, i was primed for law of assumption from a young age. this means that i experienced many and i mean MANY spiritual things from a young age. i saw spirits (not hallucinations, it was my dead grandma who i had never seen and i described her down to her ring to my dad and he started crying because it was her), started speaking french at random points without ever having consciously learned the language, heard random piano compositions in my ear which i had never heard before, had visions which protected me/warned me about the future/informed me about the future and many manyyy more things. this proves to me the power of the subconscious mind.

the difference between someone who was born with their third eye awakened versus someone who has no spiritual experiences + is not open-minded to it, is that they will view spiritual phenomena from a materialistic practical sense.

this is saddening, because humans before being impacted by materialism were so spiritual and we were the ones who created the pyramids and all the structures you see on earth. we did that.

anyways,

is it real?

my opinion: yes.

no i am not in a cult waiting to pounce on the next vulnerable piece of meat. in fact, my future career is removing people out of cults and helping trafficking victims but anyways.

i have manifested things far beyond logic. you know how and why? because manifestation is the most basic human trait. and awakening to the fact that you are the creator of your reality is the most liberating amazing feeling and practice. i manifested one of my dying cats becoming free of cancer. that is not luck. that is manifestation. i manifested bad circumstances away. not luck, manifestation. i manifested all my exes leaving me the SAME way because i had assumed they would. not a coincidence, manifestation. there is definitely a lot we don’t know about the universe. i can’t say with certainty that all things are attributed to us which is also why i hate any form of victim blaming. but one thing is for sure is that humans have more control over our lives than we think. we don’t need a divine presence outside of us to dictate us the circumstances in OUR lives.

also, law of assumption is not law of attraction. law of attraction is “AHHH DONT THINK BAD THOUGHTS OR U WILL GET BAD JUJU” very fear-based, also seen in dogmatic religions. law of assumption uses a CBT based approach to change assumptions and therefore, influence reality. you have every right to not believe in this and even chastise me for it, i understand. however, i know this is real for me.

i was a victim of many racist attacks, however, as soon as i decided that the outside world is safe for me, i never had ONE negative experience. is this a coincidence? not for me, no. this is a human taking control of their life. this is a human not bound by societal expectations and leaning into divine energy and expressing the truest essence of one’s self. i am not blaming myself for being a victim, it is the racist’s fault. i am not blaming other victims, it is the perpetrators’ fault. however, if there is any fucking chance i can help a victim, i will take it, i do NOT care.

things i manifested regarding other people towards me:

1. no more racism towards me, family and friends.

2. parents being emotionally available with me

3. my friends expressing affection the way i want them to

4. my mum making me the exact food i visualised many times

5. my professor saying the exact words to me as i visualised

6. my friends saying to me the exact words i visualised

7. this guy flirting with me out of nowhere because i visualised it

8. and many more stuff this shit is too easy so

maybe i feel this strongly because i am a fighter for the working class. my main goal in life is to help liberate all oppressed people. if there is any chance that it can be done by mind, i would take it. would you not? would you not help people by the means you have helped yourself?

how can you so strongly and with such conviction without ever practising the law come to a conclusion that is a harmful new age ideology when the maxim prevalent in so many esoteric practices (yes, non-white too) have preached that reality is made by the mind? will we ignore the science behind it too? will we ignore the cia declassified documents? will we ignore ancient accounts of reality shifting? will we ignore hermes trismegistus? will we ignore rumi? will we ignore plato?

you can ignore this. i won’t, however. this is the liberation of the human soul. having said this, anyone is welcome to criticise the LOA community, look at us as vultures, think we are crazy. i value all opinions (even if they’re wrong HAHA sorry).

how is loa different from dogmatic religion?

well for one, there is evidence for conscious manifestation (e.g. dr joe dispenza’s books). i personally do not like religion. i have religious trauma so if you are religious, id advise you to not read this section. abrahamic religion is based on fear to oppress minorities, trap human potential and it also makes you rely on luck and wishful thinking (this view is only if the holy books were to be taken in the literal sense and abused by ministers etc) whereas the human is able to decide its own fate. law of assumption liberates the human by putting the human from an us vs them view to an us AND them view, meaning everyone is one and the same. this is not a christian thing, this is a well documented thing featured in asian philosophy. consciousness is the thing that unites us all. it is within you and it is within me. religion (abrahamic) forces you to look at the people who are not like you, aka dont believe what you do, as these other creatures who have defied the will of God and ahhh will face wrath. LOA instead empowers the individual and promotes free will. i understand if you think this is dangerous, the woo-woo stuff, just dont practise it.

how is loa not a cult?

loa CAN be misused in a cult but on its own it is not a cult. no one in the loa community is forcing the individual to join this practice which lowkey is just manifestation. however, i get your concerns and i advise you to read this reply: x

i wish i took pics of my cat when she was sick so i could provide u guys evidence but of course i didnt take any pics.

anyone is welcome to leave. anyone is welcome to adjust loa to their lives the way they see fit.

the void state

i doubt that so many people are lying about manifesting in the void state. i do think it’s not a big deal but i definitely don’t think it’s fake. besides, whats the harm in trying?

thing is right, if you are not garnering results or whatever, u dont need to stay. i stayed regardless of whether i manifested my shit instantly or not (which in the beginning was hard for me) because i believed in the philosophy, it resonated with me and it didn’t make me alienate my fellow man. however, if you feel you have a chance of being manipulated here or idk what, don’t join this practice. seriously, it’s okay. i am not being sarcastic or anything, because you are welcome to stay or leave. you are welcome to compliment me or insult me. i will love you either way for you are my fellow man.

also this is so random and a general thing but only psychoanalytic/psychodynamic psychologists use the subconsciously thing.

#loa #law of assumption #manifesting #manifestation #neville #neville goddard

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pixeljade · 3 months

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I hesitated to post this because I dont want to distract from the genocide in Palestine specifically, but. Y'all. This current setup of conflicts could actually, truly collapse into world war 3. And i'm one of those people who rolls their eyes every time people cry "WW3!" at the tiniest conflict involving a world power. Let me explain:

So first of all, we have Israel genociding Palestine at the center of all of this. But Israel and Palestine are not by themselves, in fact, basically every nation on earth has picked a side. Mostly, the military aid is going toward Israel, because the US and UK and Canada have all been giving them as much as they can, but the Palestine side is escalating (they kinda got to in order to meet the powers against them), as we see with the ICJ case (which we get a result on tomorrow). On top of that we have the war starting in Yemen, not to mention the Ukraine-Russia war is still ongoing (day 700-something i believe), and the genocide in Congo and. Point is there's action across the globe okay, and America is involved in a lot of this shit.

Now look at it from the point of view of our global opponents. They want America to fall. They have seen how divided America is since 2016, and have been noting the uptick in anti-American sentiment amongst American youth in general. Same youth are organizing at a ridiculous scale, we have had some massive unions forming, and unions have formed the backbone of any worker uprising you can think of. Meanwhile the government is stretched ridiculously thin, trying to manage their capitalist-genocidal interests abroad while simultaneously balancing PR with the people of America AND the potential return of Trump. It wouldnt be too much of a stretch for one of these anti-America powers to start funding the worker movement here, meanwhile sending operatives to one of the many proxy wars across the planet, countering our actions.

Basically: the world is a fucking powderkeg and we only really need the right spark and tides could change. Something to consider right now actually is what that spark could look like. And whether or not it would be worth it.

I'd share my opinions on those but 1) thats potentially dangerous 2) my opinions upon this realization are still half-formed and 3) i want yall to come to your own conclusions. But. Consider it.

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catsconflictscopicsandchamomile · 9 months

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stop hating on the Coffee Theory ffs

ok listen.

I've considered Aziracrow to be amoral & selfish AT BEST, and hedonistic, uncaring and totally disregarding of human free will, nature, or anything but them selves at worst, WELL before s2. My views of both of these characters are, and always have been, FAR harsher than anything these anti-Coffee Theory posts are arguing for.

I'm also really, really, REALLY tired of seeing ppl getting heated and making "anti"/"critical" posts ovr a random, fluffy, tropey-asf fan theory.

I'm ride-or-die for the Coffee Theory. I love it. Here's why:

The two months after a DEVASTATING finale are explosions of creativity and expression in fandoms, even if some of it is Extremely Silly(tm). If the Coffee Theory is still as prevalent and simplistic in a few months, maybe there's a problem- but like, it's only been a week.

It might end up leading to a deeper/better theory, I've seen some posts trending that way. It might be consigned to the realm of au fic or fade away altogether once the shock of ep 6 isn't as strong and ppl have had time to rly think abt it. Or, it could vanish as a specific theory/hc, but leave trends/tropes behind for GO/Fandom as a whole to play with.

The level of Weird Obscure Bible Shit that ppl are researching to justify it is genuinely delightful, I've never seen a whole fandom really hit the lorebooks for fix-it content like this and would love if it became more common.

also it's been ONE WEEK.

have some faith that once the dust has settled and ppl start really thinking abt the events, they'll understand what Neil is trying to say.

to semi quote an anti-Coffee Theory post, the fandom will change their mind once ep6 wears off.

no it's not the point of the episode, or the character, or the show.

Let. People. Enjoy. Things.

ALSO.

whenever I see lines being drawn in fandom with terms like "anti-" or "(insert thing here) hate" or "(thing)-critical", and that Thing isn't something that's harmful in any way, red flags go up. this is a time of MASSIVE strife for writers and creators, and Neil has made it clear how much fandom needs to show up and show up LOUD both in support of a 3rd season and in general support for the ppl who make these stories. "anti-" and related mindsets carve up, distract and divide fandoms, I've seen it happen before with fandoms I was in.

this is the worst possible time to start pointing fingers at each other. Good Omens is a solid, supportive, amazing fandom, and the amount of anger and wank I've seen at this theory is ridiculous. I've NEVER gone on ANY good omens tag and just seen a screen of top-to-bottom angry/hateposting.

Click away, mute the tag, whatever, this is the NOT the time to section off the fandoms over something this fucking trivial!

the companies would LOVE if we were divided. they WANT us to point our anger and frustration at ANYONE BUT THEM. DONT GIVE THEM THAT. Get your tempers under control and use the mute button. Don't give them what they want.

We're an amazing fandom. this is a theory about coffee that kinda sorta ignores canon characterization.

also stop sending angry messages to Neil. wtf yall.

for fuck's sake just chill

#good omens #gos2 #good omens season 2 #coffee theory #good omens s2 #coffee theory critical #good omens spoilers #gos2 spoilers #good omens s2 spoilers #good omens season 2 spoilers #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #sag aftra strike #sag aftra #wga strike #neil gaiman #longpost #rant

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pansyfemme · 2 years

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Wait for real? I always heard T bottom growth kinda hit a cap at a couple inches, and it just sort varied on your body how big you'd be. You learn something new everyday

it depends on the guy! Like you said, it actually does depend on ur body and like genetics! Some guys have very little to no change in size on t, while others keep reporting changes for like up to a decade after starting it! the thing abt hrt is that theres really not like widespead enough research that we’ve pinpointed a clear timeline or like list of effects- whats on ur informed consent sheet is just the start! I find like tbh, a great deal of my changes were with my sexuality and relationship to my body! It’s easy to say that hrt like mimics cisgender puberty and so the timeline would be similar- but in my experience.. its not at all! on top of that, theres always the debate that pumping will increase ur growth, but thats like. such a divided idea that i have no idea if it has any truth to it. There was like a pretty unfortunate trend on tiktok a few months ago where like pre t guys would go on there and complain abt shit they didnt want on hrt (usually bottom growth and/or attraction to men) and while like. i get that. it often came off as making trans bodies and desires seem gross or bad bc our genetalia doesnt resemble the cisgender ideals. for some guys its like, well if i have to have a vagina, i want it to at least look like a cis womans. but in reality, i get being upset at certain changes, but its not a pick and choose kinda thing. Ive heard abt some ppl going on different types of hrt that have or dont have certain effects but, just gonna be honest with you, i think its gonna be pretty hard to get a reliable prescription for an undereseached type of testosterone, but maybe im just pessimistic. But going to be completly frank- Bottom growth isnt the only change to your genetalia, and it IS going to be different than a cis womans. changes in smell, urination, atrophy, and sensation are going to happen. Although i know different people have different ideals for their bodies- we also need to adress that internalized transphobia fucks over a lot of young trans men making us feel that we need to be ‘delicate’ to be respected. It’s a result of fetishization and cisnormativity that results in the idea that bodies should always look similar to cis ones. Yeah lol some dudes just want to look skinny and frail and hairless- but like.. we need to look at why thats the ‘ideal’ body type for young trans men. i dont think body postivity or better, neutrality can really exist without understanding that personal ideas of what you want your body to look like are affected by cultural phenomea around you. Weight, Race, Colorism, Cissexism and transphobia affect our perceptions of ourselves. So like, lol, its natural that a body that LOOKS trans is seen as undesirable to some people. But if you plan to get hrt you’re gonna have some changes that dont corospond to either idea of a cis, perisex binary. Not even a passing thing, really. It’s more for being openly trans, but only feeling desirable if your body resembles the binary idea of sex. This is also why phalloplasty is constantly ridiculed online by trans men. ‘It doesnt look realistic’ ‘It looks fake’ …. but why does it have to look ‘real’? Maybe i turned a random anon into a rant abt the transphobia related to bottom growth, but like. im passionate. this is a t dick appriciation zone and while you can not want one on hrt u need to 1) accept that is is a part of hrt 2) accept that saying a real part of many people’s bodies is ‘gross’ affects more people than yourself and 3) that trans bodies are viewed by a cis society and therefores our perceptions of them ARE affected and it’s not as ‘personal’ as we might think!

#i know someones gonna be mean to me abt this but like #u can not want bottom growth but u cant call it gross or weird bc yeah i am gonna be an asshole abt it #disrespecting trans bodies is fucking uncalled for and vile no matter whos doing it #and if u still cant wrap ur head around how our personal ‘wants’ for our bodies are affected by society then.. i dont understand you lol

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lovelessmotel · 3 years

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7, 8, 9, 12, 14 👀

7.Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?

hmmm i dont think so! if anything, theres stuff that ive grown to love and appreciate even more! ☺️

8.Have you received anon hate? What about?

girl you know i have and its always about nonsense lol! it hasnt happened in a while though and i hope it stays that way cause i dont need that negative energy in my space! ✨

9.Most disliked character(s)? Why?

doug, which is a given. and also ana 😔. ive always viewed her with this idea that they would give her development and growth (which is my fault for having so much faith in the show) but after the finale its obvious they arent. i dont hate her, but i dont have many reasons to like her either. shes sort of just there and if they arent going to give me a reason to root for her, im kinda ready to see her go

12.Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

i know theres lots of divide on this, but i really like the lawsuit arc! i think the conflict was interesting, and we got to see characters that we love make decisions that were good and bad, and i love getting into the really human flaws of our fav fire fam! i take issue with the way some stuff was done and how some fandom made buck into the victim, but otherwise i really enjoyed it!

14.Unpopular opinion about your fandom?

hmm unsure if this is unpopular but i have to say its one of the nicest ive ever been in! of course it has its bad spots but all the folks i interact with are all amazing and talented and so so nice!

#thank uuu mads ❤️❤️

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tangerinegod · 4 years

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How do you feel about people who are straight but only ship exclusively gay ships

uuuh i guess ill answer my surface level thoughts and then put a read more for a longer answer?

short answer: im gay+trans and i simply do not think or care about cishets. if a cishet only ships gay things im deff side eyeing and wouldnt interact cus of how much there is to unpack with that LMAO

long answer below the cut because the way this is phrased leaves a lot open ended + ik this is definitely an issue that needs to be talked about. ie here is what there is to unpack

long answer: in this context, straight/gay is a loose way to put it because trans people exist so boiling things down to if something is just like gay or not is kinda eh if you’re going into representation with the LGBT+ community and how people participate with/within it. i’ll make sure to define if im talking explicitly about a cishet person or someone within the LGBT+ community with this q.

if you mean someone who is cishet and only ships exclusively gay ships id probably say theyre fetishizing it to some extent considering there can be healthy relationships between anyone? my point with trans people above is made to say that trans people can be/are in straight relationships or are straight; so there are also most likely trans people who are straight and only ship gay ships. people in the LGBT+ community can participate in whatever way they want and if theyre not hurting others in the process i really dont have anything to say on it. this isn’t to say i’m like dividing things but people within the community have been forced to see straight and cis relationships in media all the time so honestly its our option on if we wanna ship straight or not. i feel like this was worded poorly so feel free to correct me, i just dont wanna brush over the fact that consuming only gay content can lead to the erasure of trans people and transphobia in general. i know this question didnt directly involve trans people with the mix but its important to include, especially with another point made down below.

if someone is cishet and exclusively ships gay ships esp if they’re diff gender like example cishet man only consuming wlw or a cishet woman only consuming mlm then they should probably reflect on the following

1. why they are so focused on consuming only one type of sexuality/gender related media and what community are they in that resulted in that; are they in a space where they are overstepping their bounds?

2. would they be ok with it irl and not just in fictional settings?

3. if a character within that relationship was trans would their view on it change? ie are they tying gender to genitals/are they transphobic and view trans people as not who they are?

4. is the context is Always nsfw ie consumed to fetishize, stereotype, and sexualize gay people’s lifestyles and relationships?

depending on how these are answered it can become obvious that the cishet person is actually homophobic/transphobic and views gay relationships as some hot jerk off material or some sacred infallible concept, erasing the fact that we exist as normal people in everyday spaces same as everyone else. on the other hand maybe the cishet person genuinely just doesnt have any straight ships LOL i think its a slim chance but a possibility

there is more i could go into because being LGBT+ is like all things, a very intersectional conversation tied together with many other issues esp in modern day society. if anything i said is completely off again feel free to correct me!! this is just my 2 cents as someone who’s participated in fandom spaces as an LGBT+ poc for.... a while.... i really couldn’t care less about a cishet person in the same way i couldnt care less about a white person, they are completely off my radar esp when it comes to content i make or wanna consume/talk about. but i do want to acknowledge that their consumption and participation in LGBT+ media can be very harmful and its important to know why.

i feel like i still have more thoughts on this but it’s a topic that is very discussion based so..... ya

i think it really varies case to case but on the surface level they’re at best ignorant but harmful and at worst homophobic,transphobic, and perpetuating stereotypes that dehumanize and delegitimize us.

#nonart #i think i spent like #2 hours typing this up LOL i really just wanna say i dont give a shit but #i do give a shit....#mhtext #anon #ask #ask to tag #Anonymous #long post

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boojersey · 5 years

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VIC DO ALL THE ASKS BC I LOVE U AND WANT U TO HAVE FUN

*SWEATS* AYE AYE CAPN

cw for like some common lgbt+ topics such as dysphoria violence discrimination etc just. tread carefully if u get triggered easily by bad lgbt experiences

What do you identify as and what are your pronouns? -im a gay trans man and my pronouns are he/him but they/them is also acceptable!

How did you discover your sexuality, tell your story?-oh wow i originally thought i was a lesbian because i didnt even know what transgender was i just thought wishing i was a man meant i was butch and then i met my friend donnie in eighth grade who told me he was trans and it was kinda a huge slap in the face but with a sack of gay bricks? and i found out i dont like women through actually having sex with cis women and finally realizing it. really wasnt for me so now im just a gay man as opposed to queer as an umbrella term but i periodically refer to myself as such

Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it?-oh yea i literally was misgendered today i just kinda brush it off but it can be hard sometimes especially when people know im trans and do it

Who was the first person you told, how did they react?-i first told donnie about my gender, it was a thing where i went to bed the night i met him and was like .. wait holy fuck and then the next day i was like BRO HOLY FUCK but sexuality? i dont really know???? it was so long ago it was honestly probably my group of friends on kik that i had in 2013 (u were included in that mister!!!!)

Describe what it was like coming out, what did you feel?-im not actually fully out but the first time someone who was an adult knew about my trans-ness was what really set in for me the fact that i could come out one day; my friends mom referred to me as seance (and like. obviously she respected my gender she has a trans kid) but it was just super jarring bc no adult had known yet abt my identity in any way and as a result i was rlly glad it was nighttime in that car bc i cried almost immediately; the first time i came out on my Own was to my cousin and he laughed in my face so that was pretty damn awful and its kinda funny cuz the bastard is bi so u would think hed have been accepting but n0pe!

If you’re out, how did your parents/guardians/friends react?-im out to my friends now ! and the reception was generally positive bc i think i do an ok job at picking ppl to be around in terms of morals so there was little bad reception

What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality?-i hate when ppl ask if im gay as in for men or gay as in for women because im trans, i am a man so when i say im gay i feel like that should be easy enough to put 2 and 2 together but when they ask that i feel as if they still view me as a woman

Describe the style of clothing that you most often wear.-emo of the gods themselves it is absolute scene and emo vomit and i love it; its seriously hard for me to wear dresses and skirts without dysphoria and just general discomfort but i own a couple anyway bc theyre cute i just. never wear them

Who are your favourite lgbt+ ships?-my main thing at the moment is gerard/frank/grant morrison bc i love poly fics very dearly and gerard/bert because bert mccracken deserved better than gerawrds internalized homophobia lol

What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any?-makeup to me is an androgynous thing so i wear eyeshadow a lot and lipstick sometimes, eyeshadow is easier on my eyes than eyeliner bc im allergic to a lot of makeup thats on the heavier side so if i put on eyeliner my eyes will water and burn throughout the day but with eyeshadow im mostly ok; other opinion is that makeup on Anyone can be sexy as hell if they do it for fun and wear literally what they truly want and not just what they think is accepted or what they Should wear

Do you experience dysphoria? If so, how does that affect you?-oh yeah my dysphoria is pretty debilitating if im gonna be honest; i used to have very little problems with it because my hold on reality was loose at best (before i was medicated to clarify) but now that i am almost completely Here my dysphoria is pretty bad and even just like. the knowledge that i have breasts is pretty awful; a few weeks ago i put on an outfit that i have to wear a victorias secret bra to fit properly in and just one look in the mirror had me sobbing and i had to change my clothes before i could leave the house and i havent worn a bra since because just the thought of showing off my chest makes this stark fuckin dread shoot through my veins but i also have dysphoria in regards to my voice that i discussed at my last trans therapy group meeting actually ; my voice has a tendency to bounce around my octave range so sometimes ill be like. excited then hear what i sound like. and ruin it for myself immediately u kno? im not even gonna talk about my dicksphoria bc thats just. awful.

What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard said about the lgbt+ community?-ohhhhhhhh my god u know what? ive heard..so much .. that im gonna instead take this opportunity to mention my mother genuinely thinks dnd is satanic

What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?-the fact that were so strong. we are so fucking strong we deal with violence and opposition constantly and at staggering rates yet we stay strong and we continue loving through all of it, whether its in dark corners in secret or loudly in the streets we continue loving and do so with all of our beings because we know its our own truth and well gladly go to hell if it means we got to love on earth (not that everyone believes in hell or the idea that us gays go to hell but my point stands)

What’s your least favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?-we have this audacity to create divide (to the fault of mostly cis white gay men thank u very much) when what we need to do is love each other because we are different but at the end of the day we all need to remain in tandem and as a family or we will never get to where we need to in terms of acceptance and that means being uplifting and protecting our trans sisters of color, our disabled lgbt members, our autistic lgbt members, our anything past cis white gay man because we all need recognition, we all need love, and to exclude any letters of lgbt is to tear ourselves down and set ourselves on fire

Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not?-no :((( no one would drive me in the past and i dont think ill have a way to get there this year either

Who is your favourite lgbt+ Icon/Advocate/Celebrity?-brian molko! my bisexual, androgynistically-inclined father who birthed me at the tender age of 16 when i found placebo

Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?-ya theres been a few and i dont rlly like to talk abt my relationships with anyone unless theyre online relationships so im just gonna leave it at that

What is your favourite lgbt+ book?-pantomime by laura lam! its one of if not my favorite book to this day

Have you ever faced discrimination? What happened?-y a every damn day bitch ! example is when i was deadnamed by my psychiatrist while she knows full well what my name is the other day; another is the countless times i get called a lesbian ???? and when strict lesbians ask me out i get a very bad taste in my mouth (i understand full well that sexuality is fluid, these are lesbians that spit the ‘penis is gross blegh’ rhetoric)

Your Favorite lgbt+ movie or show?-uh im just gonna say preacher bc its my favorite show altogether n cass is bi/pan/something similar

Who are some of your favourite lgbt+ bloggers?-@ble3dmagic is my boyfriend in crime (not rlly thats a joke) and @musicalsense is my sunburnt Brother

Which lgbt+ slur do you want to reclaim?-queer! i also use f*ggot a lot when talking about myself and my friends that are ok with it

Have you ever gone to a gay bar, or a drag show, how was it?-i went to a drag show and it was so amazing and one of the first times i felt accepted in my own community that i cried

How do you self-identify your gender, and what does that mean to you?-well i identify as a man with no leaning towards womanhood or nonbinaryhood in any way, its just . man . but in terms of Expression i am quite androgynous bc i can rlly appreciate femininity (NOT the same as womanhood) and being a man to me means just that ive always wanted to grow up with that “gender role” like i always wish i was raised as a stereotypical parent would raise a son and ive always been more interested in stereotypically masculine things and people since i can even remember and i feel like puberty was just this unpreventable spiral into something i didnt want. i didnt want it at all . this is tmi but when i got my first period i cried my eyes out bc the idea of being called a Woman repulsed me so much and since i didnt even know that being trans was a concept i was just this scared puppy full of confusion and fear aimed at myself because all the stuff i heard i was supposed to be proud of the change but i wasnt i was so ashamed of it and the idea of being called a woman made me sick to my stomach and i just wish i could go back in time and hold myself and tell me itll be alright

Are you interested in having children? Why or why not?-absoLutely not i hate kids (and by that i mean i hate being around them and the culture that surrounds having children; i do not treat kids like shit and i do not act like hating children is a personality trait; i get migraines and usually the second a child starts screaming or crying i am on the floor of my brain writhing in dire pain and i have absolutely no desire to support another human life when frankly i cant even support myself; its also just not a lifestyle i want to live)

What identity advice would you give your younger self?-god so fucking much. so fucking much. so many things i wish i could say to myself

What do you think of gender roles in relationships?-i think if someone wants to adhere to them then hell yea go ahead just dont expect others to do it or try to tell other people its a Norm or something; theyre for the most part christian in nature so i dont have any desire to follow them myself, i want a relationship (if any) thats more of a coexistence if that makes sense, like. roommates plus dick

Anything else you want to share about your experience with gender?-i always used to anxiously chew on the idea that my chest dysphoria is just me holding disdain for the shape and size of my breasts but let me tell you. the second i put on my binder for the first time i immediately started crying because i was so overwhelmed by the fact that i was looking at something one step closer to myself and i know full well i am never going to have that doubt again. this week has been exponentially cathartic and therapeutic for me

What is something you wish people know about being lgbt+?-i want the cisheteros to know that nothing they learn about us is new. everything about us has been around for so so long but has been silenced and erased to the point where a lot of us dont even know many things about our rich and beautiful history

Why are proud to be lgbt+?-honestly? its hard for me to not just straight up say im not proud of my identity. its taken me years to stamp down the plain grieving toward my identity and wishing i could have the easier path but frankly? the fact that i am choosing this path of hardship and hell on earth just to be who i truly am i think speaks volumes of my pride in my identity at this point; further back in my archive by a few years my posts are littered with sentiments of bitterness wherein i stated that i hate being trans and not just cis but i like to think ive finished hating myself for my identity. i like to think im proud now. to ask me why is to ask too much of me, all i know now is that i am proud and thats enough for me right now.

#LONG POST #KAY I LOVE U BUT HOLY SHIT MY FOLLOWERS ARE GONNA GET MOTION SICKNESS FROM SCROLLING PAST THIS AT LIGHTNING SPEED #saltwaterfox

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fixingforeverandalways · 5 years

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I know you need time...

And im listening, and im hearing you. I now understand, and this was my doing and honestly it’s the least I deserve. But I miss you, and I love you on such a level it’s hard to be without you - I know the past near 11 months since we got in contact again have not all been smooth sailing, but we have had some more than good times, you’ve become my safety in a world full of so much bad stuff.

You are my soul mate, and I will forever stand by that, it destroys me knowing that I’ve put us through this and all that echos in my head is you apologising for breaking my heart, well what about yours? I seen the look in your eyes today and I know you’re hurting just as bad as I am for being away from me, it feels so so wrong to be apart but I know that you deserve the time and space to establish your own life - so do I - so we can find the perfect way to fuse our lives together and settle down properly. by choice. without any rush or stress. Honestly we both deserve that - i so desperately need the stability of my own strength and i so desperately need a support system in place to turn to when things feel low - and despite getting there without having you 24/7, you will always be and are the centre of that support system, you’re my safe haven and the person I trust the most. In your arms with your voice soothing me, feeling your toastie tootsies at the bottom of the bed - that is the core of my support system and nothing will ever change or replace the feeling i get with you.

ive just taken that for granted too much. I like to think that in time, as I prove to you just how serious i am, and just how capable I am, that you will let me be yours too - i dont want to be the cause of your pain and suffering and i simply wont be any longer. i refuse. if it were down to me we’d be in a home together, taking a few days to ourselves but knowing we have the security of eachother at the end of it. because that’s something we both need, security - knowing that the other person has us 100%, and you’ve proven yourself to me time and time again and even more so in the last two days with your honesty and openness and willingness. and now it’s my turn.

honestly i know me and I know my personality and I know my ability to overcome in situations where i risk losing something i hold close to me. Ahead of me I’ve got 7 weeks of CBT over that period will cover a range of talking therapies based on the idea that thoughts, feelings, what we do and how our body feels are all connected. If we change one of these we can alter the others. so in turn, improving the way I view situations, and improving the way i treat my body will impact how i feel and how i act massively - especially in a situation where i can often feel way too strongly about stuff.

with the idea of CBT, it works based on the idea that ‘When people feel worried or distressed we often fall into patterns of thinking and responding which can worsen how we feel. CBT works to help us notice and change problematic thinking styles or behaviour patterns so we can feel better.’ and i’m already at the point I can physically list the toxic reactions i have when i feel overwhelmed and I know some ways in which personally ive learn to avoid that happening, for example:

Explosive anger / breaking things/ slamming things - walking away to my own space, to play games or blast music or just cry. I would like to have my own little space to do this in, be that just my princess tent. It is not ok for me to react so strongly to being angry, but i do need a healthy way to vent anger as this is very much a normal emotion.

Emotional outbursts/ crying - this is ok to do, but what’s not ok is to drag others into it. it’s ok to break down and be sad, but at this point i need to ask for comfort, a cuddle, a phone call, reassurance, i need to ASK for these things and not assume people instantly know what i need, especially as anger when crying can look a lot like sadness. and in that situation i have very different needs.

Jealousy/ insecurity/ paranoia - TALK. COMMUNICATE. TRUST. Inevitably, I can be paranoid, its arguably the most annoying symptom of them all. once someone gets a doubt in my mind i worry endlessly. by talking, communicating i can get the reassurance I need and drop it - by being open and honest and ASKING before I assume it can avoid any emotional overwhelming. as stupid and unrealistic as some things may sound, my brain will often find a way to find some logic too it no matter how far fetched, so please be patient with this as i’d rather sit down and be able to talk to you no matter how silly you might think it sounds, i dont mean to sound accusing at times i know i have done - but i need to insure i question rather than accuse in a way that isnt attacking, as to not stress or panic you. I know its inconvenient and a pain but i want to be able for us to both communicate and whilst i dont worry or get paranoid all the time, it does happen and the best course of action is just reassurance and patience, being calm with me and listening.

snapping and raising voice - this is usually the tell for any incoming outburst of explosive emotion. the typical result of so much from being tired, stressed, hormonal or simply just born from frustration. This will happen from time to time as with any couple, however its how its handled that matters, we’re both guilty of raising our voices or snapping or coming across blunt and more often than not without really realising. It can be all to easy to get triggered by this and respond in a bad way, but this can be shut down and resolved by a simple ‘there’s no need to snap, or raise your voice’ and i know in the past that has then led to more issues, this is from me taking offence because it sometimes feels like you’re trying to invalidate my feelings and thoughts. this is my issue to work through, and learn to stay calm in situations. which this is all stuff i’ve done before, and let slip when i let my whole life kinda spiral. so its an uphill battle for sure, but its also a very winnable one.

Lack of appreciation - I’m very guilty of this, i’ve been trying more recently to show you that i appreciate the things you do but on reflection actually, it’s all the small things which actually are second nature to you that i feel i dont show enough appreciation for, making juice, making the effort to talk to me and tell me about your day after you’re clearly exhausted. there’s so many things that in just two days of not being close to you that im realising need and deserve that level of appreciation. and this comes with time, it’s so easy to forget as time passes and things become the norm that actually - it’s not the norm and it deserves thanks. This is a two way street and sometimes i feel the same, but at the same time you go more than out of your way to thank me for basic tasks like washing up, changing the bed etc.... and when i feel so low in myself that makes a huge huge difference to my day. so i recognise the importance to express thanks, but i also know sometimes its not always possible or simply gets forgotten.

self care - This is without a doubt something which has a huge impact, I’ve been desperately clawing at life and the things i love trying to drag myself along with my hair and nails and dye and clothes, but honestly? its hard. i hate myself. i disgust myself. and you make me feel so wanted and loved, it changes everything when we’re going so well. but i know that it’s not healthy to be dependent on you like that, there’s no harm in boosting each-others confidence or making each-other feel good but the reality is for me that self care is the thing that will always give me a fighting chance at a good day. be it regular shaving/ bathing/ hair washing/ skin care/ nails it just makes me feel good. i like to get dressed up and look fiiine, but putting the weight back on has made it so much worse. I do want your help and advice about food, eating and working out and I know i often seem to turn my nose up but honestly i worry about being condescended to, its one of my triggers because no one likes to be made to feel stupid. and that’s also something i need to remember. i’ve under estimated you so much. that’s not ok though. but yes, the plan of action is to get my eating back under control (which is going good given the fact i cant keep any food down haha!) and take measures to get into a daily routine, even if i’m not going anywhere - just so when i catch a glimpse in the mirror i dont get low. my weight is a huge contributor to everything self care related, it gets me down massively and its a huge trigger for anxiety and paranoia for me when you make comments about people you see online etc about their weight or call people fat, because i worry you judge me the same way and it sounds pathetic but it does genuinely hurt because sometimes it sounds like size is a huge issue for you and it sends me spiralling downwards, but this is a trigger that needs to be made clear to you as i know deep down you’re just messing most the time.

unfair divide in chores/ laziness - Washing up. when we progress and work through this, can we just get a dish washer? I will hand wash all my fluffy plates etc and the unicorn ones on a fair amount, for example if i use a plate and there’s one waiting to be cleaned i wont just dump mine on top for you to do, providing there’s time i will ensure it doesn’t build up, and obviously this is a habit we should both get into really to avoid any stress over the kitchen area being unclean. especially when you’re working 13 hours a day, i cant imagine i’ll be working that long of a day! so it makes more sense for me to do that when you’re out etc.

Snide remarks - Im the worst for this. think links in massively with the snapping and the outburts. I feel at times i do this because im over whelmed, and i know this is wrong. the solution to this i feel is just pure mindfulness, and respect more than anything else. I feel CBT will help with this massively. I wish I knew more about WHY this is my go to defence mechanism but honestly I have no idea myself.

Passing the blame/ playing victim - I feel I do this more than you, sometimes when i get triggered i feel like my reactions and thoughts are out of my control... which is just stupid. because ultimately it’s my job to decide what i think about something. end of really, it’s my responsibility and after talking i realised that by me blaming you, or making silly comments that made it feel like i was blaming you hurts you, massively. Unless your direct actions has led to something bad happening, for example if you throw something at me and it hits me in the eye and i shout oH FUCK or something, then that situation i would feel that your actions would be the reason i raised my voice for that haha :P the reality of the situation is that on a personal level we’re each responsible for taking responsibility for our own wellbeing - in the sense that while i’ve got every intention of looking after you fully, if you dont open up to me like you have recently then i dont know how to fix it and won’t be able to fix it for you and vice versa.

Invalidation - This I think we’re both very guilty of at times without meaning to - or even noticing we do it. it’s so so important that we listen and understand each-other without judgement. I sometimes do not acknowledge how upset or stressed or tired you are to the extent i need to, i can be dismissive and selfish especially when you’re so late home from work etc. I can get over excited and a little self obsessed to see it from your perspective. With BPD a lot of my triggers are caused by me feeling invalided like you don't understand or take things seriously when i try to express myself and it leaves me frustrated or upset, i know now that it’s not always the case and sometimes you panic and cant deal. I feel this is something we need to work on together. and learn about each other as time passes.

The need for reassurance/ attention/ care - Sometimes I feel like I ask for attention openly and it just kinda gets brushed off or last for a short period of time before you pick your phone or something up. When I ask for attention I mean I’d like to spend some quality time with you one on one, no distractions just me being able to enjoy you. You’ve never spoken to me about needing attention or care really so I would like you to be open with me when you need something, be that for me to help with your food, run you a bath or just get things for you when you’re not feeling so good. I do feel I am a lot needier in this sense with the whole ddlg stuff, and there’s a lot more expectation and pressure for you to care for me, but please know I am more than capable of looking after you when you need it, or simply just want it.

Sex and intimacy - This is a huge huge thing for me because for the first time in a very long time i’ve actually wanted to be physically close to another person. I dont really tend to like people touching me it makes me feel uneasy to actually wanting to be close to you feels amazing. The past few months obviously have been really bad for this, and i feel at times i’ve pushed for you to want to even cuddle or be near me. the lack of interest in me ruins that ‘you make me feel good about myself and wanted and loved’ from earlier and just fills me with safe hate like there’s something wrong with me, like im ugly and gross and you just cant stand the thought of being near me. this hurts me massively. obviously I know now that this was a direct result of everything that was going on but even now in my mind all i can hear and think about is you ‘how can you expect me to want to have sex with you when you say such horrible things’ and it’s like i shut down so much when i feel unwanted and pushed away it becomes a vicious cycle for us both. I know sex isnt something immediately on the cards etc and you need time to heal, but i think it would do us good to talk about what it means to us and stuff. and reasons why or why not we’d do that yknow? i know it’s a bit of a weird one but i feel so close to you when we do that like as weird and twisted as it sounds it feels like reassurance - at this point in my life I associate sex with love, and there isnt one without the other. so in my mind, no sex = no love so when we are intimate and stuff it relaxes me and puts my mind at ease. Regular intimacy is a huge thing, even if that’s just naked snuggles and touching yknow.

Cuddles and sleeps - I have no complaints, just moar pls. all the time. every day. 24/7 ;p I do get though that sometimes it’s too hot to snuggle properly, but similarly to sex i feel that if i dont touch you then i’m not wanted. it might sound stupid it’s just another form of validation i guess.

Money and savings - I don’t really know where to go with this, I find it uncomfortable that you’re still on a joint account with Jezi and are paying off finance items in her house. Personally I don’t want to make any commitments money wise until you sort this situation out which has been nearly a year long now and you said you would sort something out in December. I personally think the situation is weird and not ok. I don’t pay for Ben’s sofa, so why are you paying for hers? This is something that should have been sorted out when you left and i feel that it’s putting our life together on hold still. I don’t want to move forward knowing you’re still on someone elses joint account etc because that isn’t fair on me. I want us to work together as a team and once we take that next step to joint assets for it to be joint between US not you and anyone else. This i feel is a massive personal boundary for me. I want to commit to you and start our life, our home, our savings and bills etc together.

Children and family - Obviously, this is a huge one and i’ve had a pretty shitty attitude to date with this and some stupid shit i’ve come out with. I think we need to draw the line with making rude or offensive comments about each-others families. See the line becomes a bit blurry when you make offensive jokes or comments about your children etc, so the expectation that others dont when you do it isnt right. I do also think we should both have a set routine and more open conversations about this. I think that effort needs to come from both of us with each others families, obviously you dont need to make effort for any of my children because they’re all furry and have four legs. ;p

I don’t want to feel like my whole life has been shaken up, and you’ve always said it wouldnt be like that, or feel like im being pushed out because like i’ve said from the start i want a life with you - and whilst yes it fully involves luna and celestia i need your word that it wont effect the things we do together, like move in or get married or have our own family etc. because ultimately these are things i want for us in the future, sure not the foreseeable future but I DO want that life with you, and i want it to be just perfect and I feel ive spent so long trying to adjust by myself, trying to educate and calm and sooth myself with a situation that you frankly just dropped me in and left me in that it’s been a struggle. There’s a lot of stuff that I thought I felt to begin with that was just a part of the process for accepting and understanding. I love having fun days out and stuff, and I do want to be apart of their lives and make a positive impact on them and be another person in their support system, but i also need to know that in difficult situations where anyone acts up or misbehaves that you will deal with that, because it stresses me out feeling like it’s not my place to say or do anything, i just feel helpless and confused because this is a LIFE, a CHILD we’re talking about and it’s not my place to do right or wrong. it was hard coming to terms with the fact they’re not something I gave you. i wish so hard that things could have been different and a part of me will ALWAYS hurt that you gave that part of yourself to someone else and not me. but the fact is that it’s done. and there’s nothing I or you or anyone can do to change that. so it was just a case of learning to come to terms with the feelings i had about it, and process them in a way that I could move past it and get on. It’s at the point that my thoughts about everything changed completely. of course i still hate the fact its not something we share, but the reality is that if its important to you then it’s important to me, and whatever your thoughts and feelings I will do nothing other than support you in that. I think my perspective even until recently was a little limited to say the least, it felt like it was a case of me or them, and that you could only be there for either me or them in life, it just felt like a competition for you attention and love because from my experience when we have them you pretty much ignore me and give me the complete cold shoulder and im not ok with that. i know its hard for them to adjust but the reality is that if you want us to be together in the long term then sooner or later they’ll have to get used to seeing us together and honestly it’ll just become the norm if we act normal.

Honesty and openness -

Approachability -

Changes in opinion and feelings -

Worries -

Moving forward -

boundaries on a personal level / exs/ porn/ stupid shit - I will do a whole new post on this! But it’s so important we both have our boundaries with things, or are at least aware of what makes each other uncomfortable or upset. Being aware of this will stop us triggering each other.

dating -

Home -

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tinkiisms · 7 years

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rules: answer all questions, add one question of your own

tagged by: @lanterniisms

1. coke or pepsi: neither tbh. i’m a water fairy!! 2. disney or dreamworks: both, but Disney more....sorry Shrek </3 3. coffee or tea: neither D: 4. books or movies: books 5. windows or mac: windows 6. dc or marvel: who?? 7. x-box or playstation: i used to have a playstation when i was little 8. dragon age or mass effect: n/a 9. night owl or early riser: i’m an unintentional night owl because i lose track of time and stay up too late, but also whenever i get up early i’m way more happy and productive during that day. so both? 10. cards or chess: chess is awesome but i never get a chance to play it so cards 11. chocolate or vanilla: swirl 12. vans or converse: i don’t really wear sneakers 13. Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash, or Adaar: n/a 15. beach or forest: beach!! 16. dogs or cats: both <333 17. clear skies or rain: clear skies are the best but i also love a good rainy day 18. cooking or eating out: eating out 19. spicy food or mild food: i can handle a little spice but i’m so mild 20. halloween/samhain or solstice/yule/christmas: christmas is so jolly 21. would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot: a little too hot. i used to want to be cold but it’s always so cold in my house, i just want the warmth tbh 22. if you could have a superpower, what would it be: flying 23. animation or live action: both?? why must i choose ;n; 24. paragon or renegade: n/a 25. baths or showers: showers, who ever heard of a bath 26. team cap or team ironman: i haven’t watched the captain america movies so iron man?? 27. fantasy or sci-fi: fantasy has to win for me just because of fairies and princesses 28. do you have three or four favourite quotes, if so what are they:

“Have courage and be kind.” + “Having a soft heart in a cruel world is courage, not weakness.”

I love all the quotes on this article which I look at every once in a while for inspiration

I also have a tag on my personal blog where I put quotes, favorite lyrics, poems, word definitions, etc.

One of my favorite books ever, Tiger Lily, is FULL of amazing, heart-wrenching lines so I love all these quotes, too.

29. youtube or netflix: i watch youtube every day and netflix once in a while so i guess yt 30. harry potter or percy jackson: harry potter was first to my heart and is my husband so i have to choose him 31. when you feel accomplished: when i go out and try something new or am busy during the day 33. paperback books or hardback books: both but for bigger books i like hardcover because they can stay open on their own and i dont have to hold them 34. horror or rom-com: rom-com all the way!! i can only watch like 2 horror movies. 35. tv shows or movies: movies 36. Pink or yellow lemonade: neither 37: wolves or tigers: wolves <333 38. 2D or 3D animated films/shorts/shows: l iSTen i’m not a 2d purist, i enjoy both and don’t see why there needs to be a divide 39. cake, pie, or cookies: hmmmmmm ice cream 40. Star Trek or Star Wars: i like both. i got really obsessed with sw for a while so 41. Bold, pastel, or neutral colors? some colors i prefer bold shades, some i prefer pastel, etc. for example i like a really bright cerulean blue, but for yellow i prefer a softer pastel shade that’s easier on the eyes! 42. Dub or sub? SUBTITLES. bc i can tell when the english voices are over-the-top or cheesy or have an annoying voice, and i can’t really tell anything off about the delivery of lines in a foreign language/accent so it makes the viewing experience more pleasant. 43. Rock or punk rock? i'm more of a pop/indie/alt rock kinda girl 44. What would be the first thing you’d do if you won the lottery? pay off all my family’s debts or college tuition or whatever we need (my sister is in college and i don’t think our home’s mortgage is 100% paid yet so i’d do that first) 45. Would you rather live in a bubble colony on the moon or the bottom of the ocean? beam me up

I tag: anybody who wants to!

#⊹*⋅✧ | ᵒᵘᵗ ᵒᶠ ᵏᵉᵗᵗᶫᵉˢ (ooc)#this is fun

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arionacurantesdesign-blog1 · 7 years

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The Latest Guidance On Identifying Key Aspects For Mortgage Broker Melbourne

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Getting The Answers For Recognising Critical Factors Of Precious Metals An Insightful Overview On Fast Strategies In Mortgage Broker Melbourne

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