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mannaima · 2 years

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Can i request some filty noncon for eddie munson..

just imagine your dustins older sister you come home from collage for spring break and meet eddie, at first you dont think much of the lingering stares and ''accidental'' toutches if only u hadn't been so naive

Homesick

Omgmgk Fmfmfm I’ve literally been thinking of this exact scenario for days and I get THIS in my inbox. It’s like fate.

Summary: You take a trip back to Hawkins and you meet an unfamiliar character.

Pairing: Dark! Eddie Munson x fem! Reader

Word Count: 4K

Warnings: Noncon, pregnancy, breeding, slight stalking (if u squint), pevert eddie, babytrapping

Hawkins. A lovely place, something you wish you could say, but there’s a reason you moved almost across the country to California for college. Well, not the only reason, you had a wide variety of colleges to choose from compared to Indiana, but you wanted to get away from that stuffy town, and college was your chance. You’d never tell anyone that, no, it’s like the people of this town have some unspoken love for it, despite its many many flaws. Spring break was approaching, and you were given two weeks off. A phone call one night before your vacation revealed your mom had bought you tickets to come back to Indiana, much to your displeasure. You wanted to spend your last spring break getting drunk with some of the few friends you had, catching up on some reading and maybe making a mixtape or two. But instead, your gracious mother had decided the best decision would be to buy you a ticket to boring old Hawkins. You pretended to be excited on the phone with your mom, her giddy tone made you feel guilty for not wanting to come, but as soon as you bid her a “see you soon!” You nearly punched a hole in your wall out of anger. Say goodbye to drunk nights at some random frat house, and say hello to boring old Hawkins.

It had been almost a full three years since you last came home, you were slightly nervous of all the changes. The plane ride was like a blur. A long. Boring. Blur. You just hoped your mom was still the sweet, albeit, a little crazy, woman. And you hope your baby brother was still the little dork he was, you sorta missed them. The flight had finally ended, the pain searing through your body as you stood, you felt like you had worked out for hours. God, why was being on an airplane so exhausting. You had gathered your luggage and you had begun to look around for your mother and brother, who had promised to pick you up.

“Think fast!” You had whipped your head in the direction of the voice, it sounded familiar to your brother’s slight lisp, only to be smacked in the face with a bouquet of flowers.

“Dustin! That's no way to greet your sister!” Your mom began to scold him and hit him on the back, which prompted a sour look to appear on his face.

“It was just a joke…” you had smiled at him and gave him a hug, you didn’t really care, you just missed being around your family, despite not even wanting to come here in the first place. Your mom joined in the hug, which made you feel warm, for the first time in a long time.

————

After moving your clothes and other assorted items back into your old room, you had felt truly at home. Just like the old days, only now you felt a little less anxiety knowing you didn’t need an escape plan, it was all temporary.

You got the usual questions, “how’s school?” “Is everyone in California stuck up?” “Do you live next to a celebrity?” “Do you have a boyfriend?”

You particularly didn’t like that last question, but you opted to pretend like it was like the others, not wanting anyone to pry further. You had a nice dinner with your mom and Dustin, talking, laughing, just like the days when you were young. Dustin talked a lot about this hellfire club, his old friends that you didn’t care about enough to remember their names, and some new dude named Eddie, who was apparently twenty? You side eyed your mom, but she dismissed it, apparently he was a sweet kid. He talked about fighting the monsters around town, meeting his girlfriend, and a bunch of other stuff that made you smile. You were glad life wasn’t boring for him, he found happiness where he is. You wish you could say the same.

You bid them goodnight, you were basically half dead from the flight and all you wanted was the sweet comfort of your bed, which made you pass out almost immediately from the soft cushion feeling.

——-

“But mom, pleaseeeee! Mike can’t host Hellfire tonight because his parents are having a party and Will and Lucas' parents won’t be home!” You heard your little brothers whining as you walked out of your bedroom, rubbing your eyes and yawning.

“I’m sorry dusty, but I have work tonight and I won’t be home until after midnight, maybe you boys will just have to cancel-“

“NO! Anything but that please! I promise to be responsible, take out the trash when you tell me to, and-“ His babbling went on, but when your eyes locked on to him, he stopped, and his eyes lit up.

“SHE CAN WATCH US!!! She’s old enough! Oh please please mom! I promise we’ll take good care of the house.” Your mom looked worried, but when she looked at you, she looked at the ground and sighed.

“I don’t want a single thing messy or broken by morning! And if your sister tells me you guys didn’t listen to her or were too loud, you’ll never have friends over while I’m gone again!” Dustin nodded and practically pushed your mom out the door, telling her to be safe at work and to have fun. You sighed, knowing you’d have to take care of a bunch of kids, nerdy ones at that.

“Did you really have to volunteer me? Now I have to watch you freaks instead of doing stuff that actually entertains me.”

“Well I don’t think drinking vodka until you can’t remember your name is something mom would approve of either way, so you’d have to watch me regardless. Besides, you can just stay in your room, Eddie can watch over us.”

“Oh, so is Eddie like your big brother now?” Dustin playfully punched your shoulder, prompting you to push him back.

Oh this was gonna be fantastic.

———

Around the time it was getting dark is when you heard the sound of people arriving. You trusted Dustin to be responsible and not light the house on fire, so you just stayed in your room reading some book you left on your bookshelf and playing ‘The Smiths’. You were at peace, hoping to keep it like that for a while.

You heard talking, shuffling, some small bangs here and there, but nothing to draw your attention. You were almost done with your book when you suddenly heard a loud scream, which made you jump into a panic state. All you cared about was Dustin, so you bursted out of your room. Only to see a group of kids surrounded a table covered in graph paper and weird figures, and some guy on the floor pretending to be dying.

“Uhh. What’s going on here…” You looked weirded out to say the least, why was he screaming so loud.

The dude didn’t stop though, his long hair flopping back and forth as he made gurgling noises and just overall strange sounds, you felt a tinge of embarrassment for him. But, in reality, you were the outsider, you were the weird one, everyone else seemed like they were having a good time, laughing along with the strange man, so you opted to just leave after he continued to “die”, and after the weird look your brother gave you. So much for trying to protect them…

Settling back into your room, you once again picked up the book and began to read, humming to the soft music, just low enough to hear the occasional laugh and bump from the group of kids. You sighed, looking at the clock, waiting for the time to go by quicker so you could fall asleep in peace, without being woken up by your mother about how irresponsible it would be to sleep while you were supposed to take care of your brother. The calm atmosphere was ruined by a knock at the door. You got up to open it, hopefully thinking it was Dustin telling you that everyone was leaving.

Instead, it was the weird guy, long shaggy hair, and a smile on his face.

“Um. Hello?” You greeted him, he seemed fixated on the room behind you.

“Woah, you like Joy Division? New order? The Clash! That’s surprising coming from a girl like you! I’m more of a metal guy myself, but these aren’t half bad…” He had pushed past you and began walking around your room, pointing at posters plastered against your wall.

“Girl like… Me?” You were slightly offended, making sure your face and tone of voice made that fact clear.

“No, look I didn’t- I meant it like- Uh. Let’s start over.” He whipped back to you and shook your hand.

“I’m Eddie Munson, President of Hellfire Club, and you are….” He began to shake your hand as you slowly said your name, very awkward…

“Sorry for the rude introduction back there, I just got really into the game. Did want to properly introduce myself to my best friend’s sister. How come I’ve never seen you before?”

“Oh, well I go to school in California. Haven’t been back to Indiana in a few years.”

“Aw, I get that. Well, it’s nice to meet you, gotta get back to the game. Hope to see you around!” He left, leaving you confused as you watched him join the game. What a strange man.

———-

Eddie didn’t have to hope for too long. He began to see you almost every day for the next week. He had decided Dustin’s place would be best for their next campaign, which they decided to do every night of the week since it was spring break, and they had nothing better to do. It was perfect for them, your mom was out until one in the morning, so they could be as loud as they wanted to. You didn’t feel like scolding a bunch of kids for screaming over fictional monsters.

But Eddie seemed oddly fixated on you. You didn’t want to seem like you were conceded, but he would stare at you the few times you left the room. He would step in the kitchen with you and just say he was getting water, but he took his sweet time grabbing a cup and staring at you while he drank. You could pass it off as him trying to get to know someone his age, instead of hanging out with a bunch of kids almost six years younger than him. But he looked at your lips more than your eyes, he always seemed to laugh at things you weren’t trying to sound funny. When you asked the group if they wanted pizza, he made sure to follow you in the kitchen while you called to order it.

“Do you think you could order a sausage pizza?” He made sure to put a lot of emphasis on the word sausage, and you swore you saw him lick his lips as you looked away. Yes, everything you said could just be seen as being nice, but with everyone else he seemed goofy and funny, but once he was alone with you, he seemed almost like the perverts you’d meet during frat parties.

Early in the day, you ran to the pharmacy to grab a few things. But you wish you had gone to the one just a few blocks away, cause Eddie freaking Munson was right in front of you, thankfully, not paying attention to you. If you only moved quicker, because the second you even thought about walking out, his eyes turned to look at you.

“Hey cutie!” You felt grossed out by the little nickname, but what was even grosser was what he was holding.

Condoms. Not just any, but the brand known to be for larger sizes. He also held some bottle of soda and a few bags of chips, but your eyes bore into the specific contraceptive.

“Hi Eddie. Sorry to bother you, I’m already about to check out-“

“Oh, I’ll check out with you!” Your eyes almost rolled to the back of your head out of frustration, but you just smiled and walked to the register.

“Soooo, did Dustin tell you about the sleepover tonight?” Your eyes nearly blew out your socket.

“Sleepover? At… my house?” He gave you a huge nod, almost like a little kid.

“It’s just gonna be me, your brother, Mike and Lucas! The other parents weren’t ok with it sadly.” You wanted to run out of the store at that very second. You had to not only deal with boys for an evening, but now all night? You firstly wanted to punch Dustin for not telling you sooner and also wanting to punch the smiling man in front of you.

Even though your items were separate, the cashier gave you two a smirk. You were confused until you saw the condoms on the conveyor belt right next to your assorted items.

“Thank god you guys are using protection. Kids these days are so irresponsible….” You wanted to interrupt her and tell her this freak standing next to you was not your boyfriend, not even your friend! But Eddie laughed, and swung his arm around you. Oh god, embarrassment filled your entire body. You wanted to die right then and there. You can’t believe he just did that. You paid for your things as quickly as possible and walked out the store. You hated Eddie Munson.

“Hey! Wait up! I'm sorry!” He was a pretty fast runner, cause he caught up with you in record time.

“I’m sorry, I just didn’t want the cashier to feel awkward. I kinda freaked out too, don’t worry. I'm sorry, can I make it up to you?” You shook your head, you didn’t want whatever favor he’d grant you.

“It’s fine. I'm just embarrassed. You don’t need to do anything.” He had his arms on your shoulders now, and he got close, almost like he was gonna kiss you.

“Ya sure?” You nodded and he smiled, got into a more acceptable position and ruffled your hair. You began to walk in the other direction, hoping he would get the hint and leave you alone. Thankfully, he did.

————

The stares tonight were more intense than any this entire week. You were baking some cookies, you were bored of just reading and listening to music, so you used some baking skills to make the kids some treats. But the kitchen and the living room had a clear view of each other, so everytime your eyes went to glance at the group, you caught Eddie staring at you. It was creepy. He had a weird smile. You just thought he was excited for cookies, but you just chose to believe your lies. You felt sick knowing he wasn’t gonna leave by the end of the night as usual, no, he was gonna be sleeping in the house you were supposed to feel safe in.

You just wanted to be asleep as soon as possible, so you didn’t have to do anything with them, not like they ever asked you, but who knows.

“Cookies are done guys. They’re in the kitchen if you want it, I-I’m going to bed…” You don’t know why you sounded so sad and nervous, maybe it was the stress of being confined into a small town again, or just missing California.

“Whatttt, why so early?” Eddie chimed, hand on his chin like he was staring at you for a while.

“Just don’t feel good. But don’t let that keep you guys from being loud, I can barely hear you in my room. Have fun guys.” You lied, you could hear them being very loud, using music to drown out the sound, but you could put on earplugs if you needed to, you wanted these kids to have fun. You laid down on top of your bed and started to fall asleep, you were so tired from the stress of everything that you seemed to sleep almost instantly, letting your mind create shapes and colors as you drifted into dreamland.

———-

You felt something. You felt multiple things actually, a touch on your cheek, the sheets shifting, your neck being rubbed. You kept your eyes shut, it was probably a dumb prank from your brother and his friends, it had to be, who else would be touching you? You wanted to give no reaction, nothing that would indicate you were annoyed or upset about this. But, the touches wouldn’t stop. There was no boyish giggle after they touched you, no, you heard a soft moan as the strokes got lower, to the neckline of your shirt and one hand began to rub even lower. This wasn’t the work of some kids, it was clearly someone with disgusting intentions. You finally got the courage to open your eyes.

Eddie. You knew it was him the second you saw his messy hair. He wore a Metallica tee, loose and had a few holes around it, clearly worn. His rings weren’t on, and his hair seemed more a mess than usual, probably from laying down. Fear sorta ran through your body, you were very tired and had no energy, but you were still scared and disgusted.

“Oh, you’re awake.” He said as if you were supposed to be used to this, so nonchalantly. The way his hands moved around were skilled, like he knew where to touch to make you feel good. But you didn’t like it.

“You’re so pretty. I can’t stop looking at that cute face, you’re just so adorable. When Dustin first told me he had a sister, I thought you’d be some nerdy girl, some geek like him, but no, you’re this little sexy deviant. But if you were a nerd you’d still be hot. B-But, anyways, I really can’t stop staring at that body like. Fuck, you’re so pretty. Ok, what I’m asking is, will you be my Girlfriend?” He was nervously looking at you, the words spilling from his mouth like word vomit, voice even cracking at certain points. You just stared at him, he couldn’t be serious, right? He couldn’t actually think that you would say yes, after he woke you up by touching you in your own bed.

“W-what? No, I can’t. You’re, you’re… Look. Maybe you’d be sweet, but I'm just not into you like you are with me. Also, this isn’t something guys should do. You shouldn’t creep on someone and wake them up in their own bed. Sorry Eddie, can you please leave now?” You felt nervous saying all that, yes, he did do some creepy stuff, but you didn’t want to hurt his feelings too much. He just stared at you. No emotion on his face at all, eyes sinking into yours, when suddenly it was replaced with a smile. Like he just got a joke.

“Ohhh, I get it! You’re playing hard to get! You want me to keep trying. So clever. Come here.” You shook your head, about to tell him he was wrong, that all you wanted was to sleep, but he slammed his lips against yours. His lips moved while you tried to purse your lips as tight as possible, sadly, you didn’t move quick enough, because his tongue slipped into between your now moist lips. You felt sick, you wanted to gag and scream and tell him to leave you alone, but you froze up.

His hands moved around your body, sliding around your waist as he reached to squeeze your behind, which warranted a twitch from you, and more squirming. He just wouldn’t get the hint, the longer his tongue moved in your mouth the more you began to blame yourself. Did you lead him on? Did you say things to seduce him? Were you in the wrong? But you just kept letting the thoughts get to you as you lay still, his hands never leaving your skin, the warmth suddenly felt like burning heat. His mouth began to move away, a trail of saliva connecting the two of you, barely visible in the dark room, illuminated by the moonlight.

“You’re so fucking beautiful. I don’t think a single girl has ever compared to you. You’re gorgeous.” His eyes stared into yours, romantic words spilling off his lips, but it was in one ear and out the other. The love he radiated maybe would have wowed you years ago, but after dealing with frat creeps, you knew the lengths men would go through to get into your pants. But strangely, the more he spoke, the more genuine he seemed to become. Letting himself stutter and trip on his words as he confessed his love to you. He probably didn’t know more than your favorite color, how could he possibly love you?

He gave you a kiss on your forehead before shifting your figure on to your back, his legs straddling around you. He seemed to be only wearing his boxers, because he pulled out his cock in record time. You winced, knowing you only wore panties and a tee from your college, too lazy to put on proper pajamas. You were setting yourself up, you had let yourself be vulnerable knowing he was in your home, it’s like inviting the prey to kill you.

“Fuck. I bet you did this for me. Waiting for me to get in here. Look at you, all exposed to me…” His middle finger began to pull down your panties, cold air hitting your pussy, making you jump.

“I can’t wait any longer, I’m sorry princess. When we do it at my house I promise to do more.” He swiped off your panties and began rubbing his tip all around your entrance up to the clit. It was a strange feeling, you didn’t like it, despite getting pleasure out of it. You didn’t have any more time to analyze the feeling before he began to push into you, making you whip your head up. Before you could even make any type of noise he slapped his palm against your mouth, shushing you while he pushed in further. Your cries were muffled by his hand, but you hoped someone could hear you. The pain felt unbearable. It stung, burned, ached, everything in the book, nothing but stupid pain.

“I know, I know, baby. I know it hurts. It’s okay, it’s gonna feel good soon, just let me thrust, alright?” You shook your head, you knew the pain would just amplify, and you were correct. After the incredible pain of bottoming out into you, he began to move his hips, dry cock filling your pussy. You squirmed, eyes closed as you screamed into his hand. He kept lowly groaning as he did so, and his pace quickened.

Despite you shaking your head, the pain began to slowly fade away as you could wear wet noises, sloshy and strange, but you knew it was the body's natural response to this type of infliction. You cursed the female form, but you began to feel pleasure take effect. You wanted to stop yourself, you wanted to keep screaming, but you began to moan, it felt incredibly good, you had forgotten the pain he had inflicted on you, almost like you were in a trance.

“Aw fuck, you like that baby? I b-bet you do, your pussy is so fuckin’ tight right now, it’s squeezing me so hard. You’re gonna make me c-cum baby. Jesus…” He didn’t stop his speedy pace, he let himself moan a little louder, but his hand kept pressing against you rather harshly. You couldn’t take it, it was so overwhelmingly amazing, you kept your eyes shut, as every glance at him made you remember this wasn’t to be enjoyed, but the pleasure you felt couldn’t be ignored, you could do nothing but allow it to happen, too weak to fight back.

“Oh god my love, I’m gonna cum. I'm gonna cum inside you. Y-yeah. M-make you a mommy. Y-you’re gonna be all pregnant with my kid. It’s gonna have such a pretty mom. I love you, oh my god I love you.” He tried to stay quiet, but he got rather loud, but your eyes opened immediately at the word “pregnant.” Oh my god, he wasn’t actually going to cum in you was he? You remembered he had bought condoms at the store, you had assumed he slipped one off while you were trying to make yourself disappear. He was just saying that, maybe he’s trying to scare you. Please be a prank, please just be him trying to make you intimidated, please please please.

And with a muffled moan into his free hand, he slammed his hips into you and let out his cum in your pussy. You felt the warmth flow within you, you could feel it running, a feeling like no other. You just stared at the ceiling, you couldn’t believe it. Your little brothers best friend just came inside you, possibly getting you pregnant of a baby you never wanted, from sex you never asked for. The numbness took over, you hadn’t noticed he’d taken out his cock from inside you and had pulled up his boxers and smiled at you, he laid by your side.

“You know…” He stroked your cheek, making you look at him, face as emotionless as possible.

“I wonder how cute our babies would look…”

—————

Your life has changed since that night, that disgusting, horrible night. That night became one of many.

After he had taken you by force, he had taken it upon himself to tell your mom you two had begun to go out. She was shocked, saying how she’d never expect you to date someone from Hawkins, always expecting you to date some surfer from California. Yep, you never thought the same.

You felt as if Eddie had told everyone in town you two were a couple, because in two days, old high school acquaintances had come over to say hi and say how good it is to meet you, and how they never thought you’d be dating the current school freak. You never thought you would either.

Eddie had also told your mom that you were pregnant, which you had no idea if you were. She was shocked, but not upset, but told you she wouldn’t let you return to California, that you would spend your days in Hawkins, you needed to stay with the father. She was the one paying for your tuition, so your hands were tied. Eddie also had his own threats involving a knife or two. You felt sick, your dreams of living anywhere else except Hawkins, Indiana were crushed by some guitar freak who now was the father of your children.

Everyday, Eddie kissed your stomach and then you, cracking a few jokes as he laid with you. All you did was stare at the wall and wondered how different life would be if you never came back. If you stayed in california. If you cut off contact from your mom, if you had only come for a weekend. Anything. But you just looked at Eddie talking and explaining something about DnD. You missed California more than anything, you missed the bright sun that kissed your skin when you left the house, you couldn’t stand the gloomy weather that constantly cursed Hawkins. You missed the girlfriend’s you made, sure, they weren’t the best of friends, but so much better than the so-called-friends you had here in Hawkins. You missed being free most of all. Eddie insisted you stay inside all day, not letting you get a job or go anywhere without him. You stayed in his trailer all day while he attended school, his after school activities and sold his drugs. You could do nothing but stare at the wall and wish you had never come back.

Your stomach grew, there wasn’t any way you weren't pregnant, he constantly fucked you and came in you each time. Despite the treatment Eddie gave you, you stroked your belly while he was gone, maybe it was instinct or hormones, but you loved the baby growing inside you. Maybe you could learn to love the man who helped you make it.

#dark eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #stranger things season four #dark! eddie munson x reader #stranger things smut #tw noncon #tw pregnancy #tw babytrapping #stranger things x reader #eddie munson smut

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sphericalbee · 12 days

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this is long asf and i know it STARTS w me being like 'i should kms' but im gna spoil it for u all and say that's NOT where it goes lmfao im just dumping out all my thoughts

!! very very rambly, not proofread even once, probably makes no sense and is very cheesy

i wrote a fucking novel holy shit LMFAO no hard feelings if u skip

if i can be kinda depressing for a second i think ab killing myself too much for someone who is basically fine (that might be a lie idk i don't feel like thinking ab it more rn) 😭 like the world just has so many issues i dont wna deal with,,, yk? and it would be so much easier to just move on to whatever's next, bc i KNOW ill have a fuckton of debt in college and have to live through miserable relationships and watch the earth fall apart bc our leaders r so incompetent. even now im living through like 5 genocides, insane global warming, a poverty crisis, inflation, and all of this can be boiled down to greed and hatred

also a lot of kids my age are so horrible for no reason and it's sad to think how many people just absolutely suck ass

but at the same time i won't kill myself bc there are people who i wna make sure get through everything alright, and ik i have good things to live through too

so ive compromised and decided i get to shoot myself in the head when im like 60 if i don't have a wife and the world is still a mess 💀 like i don't wna live longer than i'll enjoy it (lets be reallll global warming will kill us all before i have to do anything anyway)

surprisingly, i got a lot better after reading philosophy books? making sense of the world and appreciating the genius of the philosophers, who were ppl just like me, helps

i feel like ive found so many new ways to think ab and experience the world through philosophy. it's a beautiful part of humanity, trying to understand and having genuine fascination about the way things are and what everything means

good music helps too. yerin baek to fall in love with everything and cry over every single feeling you've ever had ever, universe mongae when that's too much and i have to detach

i listen to universe mongae a lot in class bc my classmates fuckingh SUCKK and she sets me apart from my emotions or feeling lonely when im leaving myself out on purpose bc they're not good people

a few days ago, i was listening to yerin baek as i walked back to school from lunch and the world was suddenly so beautiful and i realised how everyone else has a consciousness and worlds just as real as mine and i fell in love with everyone (by everyone i mean like 30 people)

suddenly i couldn't even care how much i missed out on or the people who i wish loved me more because in the grand scheme of things, im allowed to be careless and love without reciprocation and it won't matter because i hold no more worth than a dragonfly... to have zero expectations for what you could and should feel or be and just enjoy yerin's voice in the moment might be one of the happiest moments i've ever had, honestly

yk whats ironic? it was a love song directed as another person that made me realise i could feel love and not care if i was still no one's favorite. life is beautiful anyway because i can love and make it beautiful on my own

not that my state of 'im fine with loving everyone alone' will last very long. i mean,, im just a mammal LMAO i can't deny my own brain chemistry

even just earlier today i finished the math test earlier and accidentally started thinking ab my childhood. idk why it happened but i did

and i remembered how i was so selfish and couldn't let anyone see i was anything less than perfect

there's one memory where i mispronounced a word and a girl corrected me. and i immediately tried to say, "no i know, but my brother says it that way and i do it too on accident". she called me out, obviously, and i rolled my eyes before whispering "it's true though" in the hope that someone would hear and think "oh she actually knew that"

it's sad to think how i used to be. that's from around 7th grade, i think, so i would've been 11 maybe?

up to a few months ago i would randomly remember that and feel insane anger and hatred for my younger self

it seems so foreign to me now and weird that i could hate a child for being brought up with horrible conditions and lacking emotional maturity. i thought that if i could go back in time i would just look at her and feel bad bc i got so much better since then

maybe even love her idk she's not having fun either 💀 do u think she enjoys holding herself to absolute perfection and looking like a dumbass in front of everyone when that's inevitably impossible??

there was another time that made me so sad to think ab

i got dragged along to my brother's friend's birthday party and some kid did smth rude

and i watched as the kid got chewed out by his mom and then went to apologise to the birthday kid

and the birthday kid just said, so seriously, "I accept your apology"

and i remember thinking smth like 'whoa that's cool id be so embarrassed talking like that'

thinking ab that time (i think i was 12ish maybe) is so crazy. like my parents did such a shit job that i thought i had to be SO ALOOF and above it all that accepting an apology was weak and embarrassing?? jesus i cannot wait to move out 💀 ill send them an email when im gone telling them everything they'd send me back to therapy for

ive been reading too much philosophy, and a lot of that revolves around the meaning of life and how to achieve happiness/catharsis. but i think i have my own conclusion of what it means to be happy even without plato haha

ive never been happier than when i began to forgive and understand myself

it feels like i can live as i want and it's not important. one of my favorite quotes is "i could die tonight and hold no more significance than a dragonfly's death". i wouldn't say im a nihilist but i do like the idea that nothing means anything other than the worlds we have in our minds

it's my mission to make those i care about happy and carve out a good future for myself

ive tried to follow a lifestyle of "i work for my future without ruining my present" but ngl i just ended up anorexic literally three times in the past 5 years 💀 idek what i did wrong like DAMN?? chill tf out hggsdhgfsgd i had a panic attack over eating an extra bit of cheese one time

also fuck my parents for giving me no life skills. raising urself is really hard and you end up with so much internalised bullshit

im honestly so proud of myself for turning everything around after 8th grade

i guess i owe a lot to my classmates for not letting me get away w bullshit and caring ab political issues

it's pretty wild that i cry at movies now when last year i was apathetic all the time

i think i like having feelings? pretty undecided still ngl

i think it's a step up

but i can't even talk to my parents ab how they fucked everything up for me and i had to pull myself out pf the absolute trenchessssss or theyll make me do family therapy and ill end up forgiving them which id rather explode than do

anyway ig my point is if you're having trouble with existence or mental health, pls don't give up on yourself. i promise there's people out there who either love you or will in the future and you just need a few quality coping mechanisms to make it through the day

whether that's antidepressants, the powerpuff girls, philosophy (:33 which it should be), yerin baek (which it also should be), or vent art, find ways to make life liveable until you're ok again. bc you always will be in the end

i probably don't know you but i love you because you have a life and a consciousness

please recognise that about everyone

i read somewhere that everything will always be alright in the end and if it's not okay yet, it's not the end either. it sounds dumb and doesn't really make sense (where's the logic lmao site ur sources at least) but it's such a nice sentiment

i think ummm i will go to school and give all my friends a big hug tmrw so pls don't be sad in the meantime

anyway loossemble's new album is good im so happy for them

this is the happiest and healthiest hyeju's ever looked i lowkey wna cry over how well theyre doing ;v;

also highkey want her to put me in a chokehold like GHSFDFJFSDHGJK those ARMSSSSSS MOTHER??

fuck modhaus tho i hope artms r doing well... fucking jaden jeong ugh

#tw suicide #motivational kind of maybe i think??#i won't kill myself gdfhgggdsad dw i just think ab not having to deal w everything and it seems like such an easy way out #but i got more shit to do!!#ur not getting rid of me for 40 more years at the latest #vent #(??)#not rly #more like #a thought dump #tw anorexia #tw ed #tw eating disorder #just mentioned but still there #personal #thats not even a tag i use im just putting whatever #bye bye #there's a giant ass bug in my shower so i washed my hair in the sink

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nonclassyparty · 2 years

Text

Hiraeth (P.SH)- Teaser

A hundred lives across a million realities.

Life is weird for Park Seonghwa. Especially when he’s lived through more than one. One life he falls asleep as a king and in the next, he wakes up as a college student with exams next week.

You are always there, in every life. Taunting him with the mistakes of his past. Always an inch out of his grasp and never his completely, yet Seonghwa thinks that every life in which he meets you will be the one where he gets to keep you.

A hundred lives across a million realities.

No one is the same but does anything really change? What a fucking joke.

pairing: seonghwa x reader

warnings: EVERYTHING. smut, angst, death, blood, gore...idk i’ll add later

taglist: send me a message if u’d like to be added :)

status: coming july 2022.

a/n: so SO SO SO here’s a little part from hiraeth, it will be a one-shot i finally decided bc it will go on forever if i make it a mini series 😭 this is just a little preview, me trying to test out something a little bit different lol. i hope you guys enjoy it bc im really having a lot of fun writing it also, there’s obv a lot of history involved here so don’t hold it against me too much, my knowledge from the japanese occupation of s.korea and all the other eras i mention is very basic (which i know isnt good if i want to write this properly but it is what it is, dont take it too seriously).

Myeong-dong, Seoul, 1921.

Seonghwa's mother hated when he smoked in front of the bakery. Apparently, it was a bad image that drove potential costumers away. As if a guy smoking tobacco outside of the humble establishment would somehow deteriorate the quality of their bread rolls. They were the only bakery on the street as well. She was so dramatic.

But thankfully, she wasn't here today.

Which is precisely why Seonghwa sat on the wooden bench of the display window, with the thin stick filled with tobacco between his lips as he lit it up with a match. He wasn't on break, per say, but if there weren't any costumers in the store and Jongho didn't need any help with the kitchen work in the back- there really wasn't a reason why he should be stuck behind the counter, especially with how hot it was inside due to the oven being used.

It was a little bit over noon, Hongjoong should be around here somewhere anyway. His childhood friend had nothing to do but roam the streets, looking for a mess to be in. It was why Seonghwa's parents never really liked his friend. They thought he influenced Seonghwa badly.

Little did they know that behind almost every bad idea they had, Seonghwa was always the main culprit and not the other way around. Hongjoong just followed him, for the sake of it.

"I'm assuming Mrs. Park isn't around today since you're smoking outside." Hongjoong spoke loudly as he approached where Seonghwa sat, taking a seat next to him on the windowsill. His white shirt was missing a button and was wrinkly, very different from Seonghwa's carefully ironed and buttoned up shirt, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows.

"You would be correct." Was Seonghwa's response as he stared at the people moving up and down the street.

Ladies holding mini umbrellas to protect them from the spring sun, holding onto the elbows of the gentlemen that walked beside them. The neighbourhood kids of the working class running around with their toys in hand as shrill laughter followed them. It was always so lively here.

"They went to the docks to collect packages for the store today." Seonghwa explains as Hongjoong lights up a cigarette of his own. His cigarette box was embroidered with gold and it served as a constant reminder of the difference between them.

Hongjoong wasn't like Seonghwa. He was a rich kid, the son of the man who owned the biggest factory in town. Maybe that's why Hongjoong was so careless in following every bad idea Seonghwa had. Seonghwa did it because he was reckless and dumb while Hongjoong did it because he could afford it.

Even now, despite barely making it through basic education, he has a job secured. Maybe even outside of South Korea, if things get worse here. It's why he can parade around the town every day like this, with his wrinkly shirts and golden cigarette cases, because he will always have a place to fall back on.

Seonghwa, on the other hand, only had the little family bakery which he will probably inherit if the military don't throw him in jail or something by the time he's old enough to run it.

But he wanted to go to school more. Maybe become a translator for the Japanese so he could get an office job and get away from flour and the heat of the oven. He couldn't though, it was only available for people who could afford it, meaning children of the upper class and the militants from abroad.

Oh well. It's the stack of cards he's been dealt with in this life, so he'll just have to make due.

"There's a festival at the square tonight. You should come." Hongjoong offered, exhaling the smoke with his eyes crinkled from the sunlight poking into them.

"Can't. When mom and dad get back, we'll probably spend the whole night restocking in the back." He responds with a sigh, his lips quirking a bit. It's nice that Hongjoong keeps asking, despite knowing what the answer will be.

Ever since their last debacle which involved a stolen pig and running away from the guards, his parents held Seonghwa on a tight leash. It's been four months now and they still weren't budging.

"I'll tell you all about the pretty girls I see, don't you worry." Hongjoong teased, clapping Seonghwa on the back and he chuckled in return, shaking his head a little.

"Not like you're going to have any luck with them." Seonghwa teased back with a smirk, eyes still set on the strangers moving up and down, peering into the displays and so on.

"Hey! I'll have you know that me and Eunji from the Songs had a great time behind the hay barns." His friend complains with a whine, punching Seonghwa's shoulder lightly.

"Sure. Sure." Seonghwa was still smirking.

"Asshole." Hongjoong mutters, looking through the display into the bakery, "Where's Jongho?"

"He's somewhere in the bac-" Seonghwa's words get stuck in his throat as he catches a glimpse of a figure from across the street, walking with two children on each side.

A girl.

A girl clad in a white dress that reached her ankles, cinching at her waist. The wide sleeves of it swayed in the light breeze with every step she took as she observed the displays of the passing stores. Her long, midnight black hair was intricately braided and rested over one shoulder with a ribbon tied at the end.

Seonghwa found himself unable to tear his gaze away from her figure, something deeper than butterflies settling in his chest than when he normally spots a pretty girl. Something that makes him feel like he's getting pierced through the chest with a knife the longer he stares at her. Something aching to...pain? It was...Why is he getting the urge to be near her? What was this feeling?

This went beyond regular attraction and Seonghwa couldn’t explain why. Deep sorrow filled him up as he stared at the beautiful girl and his insides were twisting like a hurricane, bending and swaying anything in its way. He wanted to be closer-

"Forget about it." The voice that comes from his side cuts his train of thought and he turns his head to Hongjoong who was watching the same girl.

"What?" Seonghwa chuckles, awkwardly trying to play it off like he wasn’t almost brought to tears while staring at a complete stranger.

"Her?" Hongjoong asks, subtly nodding his head in the girl's direction. She was now crouching down next to the little boy that was with her, pointing out to him something in the display. "Forget about it."

"Why? Who is she?" Seonghwa questions with furrowed brows, the awkward smile slipping when he noticed how serious Hongjoong was being.

"Mayor's niece. Her name is Yumiko." His friend spoke with a hushed tone, gaze still trained on the girl's, your, figure. "She's here for the summer, lives in Tokyo, grew up there as well. Filthy rich family. I heard she's going to be one of the first women to start higher education there. So just...forget about it."

Seonghwa stays quiet, eyes still trained on you across the street. Yumiko. You seemed familiar despite the fact that he knows he never saw you before because he definitely would have remembered you. That name doesn't suit you, Seonghwa has no idea why he feels that way but he just does.

Yumiko. It means arrow child in Japanese. At first glance, he would've expected your name to be something softer, gentler and complimenting to your looks. Hm.

"Hwa," Hongjoong's stern voice and Seonghwa pulls his dazed eyes away from you once again and turns to Hongjoong who is staring at him with sharp eyes. "I'm serious. I know I always support all your stupid ideas for shits and giggles but just trust me on this, you don't want to get involved with her. Her father is fucking insane."

"I was just looking at a pretty girl, Joong." Seonghwa replies with a small chuckle, "it's not like I'll ever even talk to her or anything."

"Good, keep it at that." Hongjoong nods, taking another drag of his cigarette. "Besides, she's probably been spoken for in an arranged marriage ever since she was, like, twelve or something. It's how families like that work."

"Yeah, okay." Seonghwa nods finally, staring at his friend a little bit longer and trying to keep his thoughts in check. Yumiko. Yumiko. Yumiko. Y/N. Yumiko. Yumiko. Yumiko.

#seonghwa x reader #ateez x reader #ateez angst

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misspickman · 8 months

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tim and cassie for the headcanons!

for cassie

Sexuality Headcanon: lesbian

Gender Headcanon: transmasc, in a butch lesbian way

A ship I have with said character: cassierose, cissiecassie,, she and kiran could be cute too i just dont have much to say about it since kiran got very little time to shine, i believe in it tho

A BROTP I have with said character: cassie & tim!! theyre messy and they get each other. im a loud hater of tt03 but i do think about them during that grief era a lot, horrid relationship but very compelling as a trauma response. AND theyre best friends. also cassie & artemis i miss themm they were so fun, cassie & diana too i feel like they really dropped cassie from wonder woman comics a while back and its never been the same.. but theyre sisters<3

A NOTP I have with said character: cant imagine cassie with men.. i appreciate the mess between her and tim for fun and i think her and kons relationship is important to their characters, just not for actual like. romance reasons. but i guess these count

A random headcanon: i think she should play football not american football just u know the vibes. yes i think shed kill it in yellowjackets

General Opinion over said character: cassie my best friend cassie i just finished going through my reading list for her and im so sad she never got a longer solo bc we get so little about her civilian life and the lack thereof. i think the choice to have her commit to being a hero full time and living at the tower is v interesting (and a shame that rebirth brushed that away just to say shes going to college and thats it) and i would love to see her deal with that and how not having a civiliain identity would impact her life further, also who she wants to be after wonder girl.. this is less of an opinion and just me rambling but agh cassie. she makes me sad and sometimes she is just like me fr

tim

Sexuality Headcanon: bi! as he is<3

Gender Headcanon: i think ive been very loud about my transfem tim thoughts but that might just be in my head bc i think about him a lot. anyway its real to me. i know her. if it seems like i default to cis guy tim in my fics its just bc he hasnt had his gender crisis yet, trust. i do also like the idea of a more gnc cis guy tim which might or might not lead to him being genderfluid. much to think about

A ship I have with said character: i often default to timkon but i really like him with danny, lonnie and tam too

A BROTP I have with said character: cass, cassie, helena, dick, i also would have liked to see more of him and rose without the uhh very weird writing going on with them in tt03 and tt cold case. tim and steph in their divorced era specifically are also very dear to me

A NOTP I have with said character: whatever people are doing with fanon timkon which is mostly bc of what they do to kon but my god the woobifying of tims character is also so bad. all the many incest ones but a special aside for j/ytim bc its so painfully ooc they would not fucking say that. my god

A random headcanon: well car guy tim is very canon but also i think hed be fixing his own car like, for fun. he would get a car he can tinker with specifically. in some au i think itd also be fun if he did car racing

General Opinion over said character: hes fine

#thank u<3 #ask #i cant give u a general opinion on tim ill never shut up

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ashthemadwriter-archived · 2 years

Text

Seeing you in a wedding dress for the first time

Fandom: Haikyuu

Pairing: Oikawa x fem!reader

Genre: Fluff,Humor

Format: Scenario

Warnings: Tiny bit of NSFW,but nothing too accurate

Word count: 0.9K

A/n: dude i wrote this at 3 am and i was supposed to be sleeping/studying for my upcoming exam in the morning,but im just obsessed with this scenario

not proofread

here you go Oikawa stans! youre welcome ;)

Suna version

it was just a crazy idea.an idea that popped into your mind the minute you laid eyes on the gorgeous wedding dress in the showcase of the shop near your college.

"what would Tooru's reaction be when he sees me in this?" you thought to yourself while caressing the soft,fluffy material on its skirt.

so you rented the dress,just for one night-tonight.it didnt cost you a lot because the owner had seen you gasping and literally drooling while staring at the dress,more than once,which made her feel bad so she gave you a remarkable discount.

And now here you were,wearing red lipstick and eye make up on, your hair chignoned Elegantly which couldnt have been done without the help of your roommate,who was sitting in front of you on her bed, her eyes moving from her watch to your face every ten seconds.

"what time he said he'll get here?" "in a few minutes" you mumbled,while scrolling through your phone,wishing to come across something interesting. "well it has been half an hour since he told you that,and i cant see any sign of him here" "SO IMPATIENT! why do you even care anyway?" you giggled as you present her an innocent smile, already knowing the reason why she was acting like this;but you couldnt miss an opportunity to tease her,could you?

"EXCUSE ME? are you for real? dont tell me that you forgot about how you made me stay at my friend's house the other night you wore a dirty outfit!" "but its not a dirty outfit this time!" "yeah! its a wedding dress! thats even worse!" she whined dramatically,pouting as the memory of that night became lively in her mind.her friend's house was not nice-not at all like her good old dorm room,which she had to share with you,unfortunately.you weren't a bad roommate,you were just...just...

too carefree when it came to being with your boyfriend.

you two continued chatting-which was basically you listening to her nag about things that was bothering her,and you were definitely on top of her list-until you heard a slight knock on the door. "babe? you there?"

you smiled as you heard the familiar voice that belonged to your boyfriend,and got excited cause it was show time!

"your prince charming has finally arrived,idiot" your friend says while opening the door,facing the usual nice while mischevious look on Oikawa's face. "well,arent you a pea-" he was planning on teasing her a bit longer,but was speechless when his eyes met with yours.

"Awwww what happened?did the cat ate your tongue?" you gave him a cocky smile,gliding toward him as you gyrated to give him a better view.

"so,what do you think?" he remained silent,but the sparkle in his eyes did all the talking for him.there wasnt much left for him to say.

however,there were plenty of things he could do.

within a blink of an eye,he literaly threw you on the bed,came on top of you as he crashed his lips into yours,tasting them harshly like a starved man.youre friend could swear that she heard the bed crack at that moment,but there were more important things to care about.

"h-hey! do this shit when youre alone together!" it was clear that you both heard her words,but anyone could tell that none of em really mattered right now.Oikawa was head over heels in love with you already. you were one of the most important things in his life and he really wanted to spend his lifetime with you,but seeing you in that dress...

you looked like an angel.an angel he wanted all for himself so badly.

at first you just continued your little make out session to tease your friend for a bit,but now? you couldnt resist his touch.

not when he was this passionate.

his hands traveling through your body,caressing the delicate skin with his fingertips as he comtinued smooching.you could hear his heartbeat,racing like hell.why was he so impressed anyway? you didnt really see this coming,but he was obsessed with you.he wanted to wake up with the feeling of you clinging to the side of him.he wanted to go to sleep with you in his arms,placing small kisses on your sensitive neck while breathing the sweet scent of your shampoo that was left on your hair.he wanted to be the one who gets to comfort you when youre feeling down.he wanted to be the one who you share kids with.he loved you,so much more than you can even imagine.

you were both running out of breath,but were too stubborn to break the kiss.air was not that important anyway...

your hands gently found their way under his boxers as you felt his hardened lenghth rubbing againts your clothed cunt,peeking at the room with your right eye just to realise your friend was gone long ago,

and you were too all over each other to notice.

Bonus:

◆you did buy the dress in the end,cause your beloved Tooru ripped it apart

◆and you actually started thinking about starting a family with him,and he seemed to be on the same page as you but was looking for a great opportunity

◆he got the opportunity when he found you in your bed looking kinda sick,with a used baby check on the drawer a few days after "the incident" :D

Reblogs are super duper appreciated! ty for reading this and i hope you enjoyed it :)

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obxsprincess · 2 months

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heyy girl, how are u? i know ive been kinda missing but i might need your advice on something bc im very confused and unsure (and my friends are being kind of unhelpful bitches lol

So, im in college right? and theres a lot of fraternities around, and I met this guy, a friend of a friend, and he lives in a fraternity.

So far so good right? We kinda flirted with each other for a few days until a party last night where we finally hooked up (i was drunk but everyone said it was pretty hot :)) but i had to leave bc my roomate was very sick so i never got to talk to him abt anything else basically. And my friend said tomorrow they'll have a small party to celebrate a bday on that fraternity, and everyone keeps saying i should lose my virginity to this guy (ik shocking im a virgin), but the thing people dont understand is that i get attached very quickly and to me our kiss basically locked in, so im kinda nervous ill get attached and he wouldnt want anything serious w me

Reading it back it feels kinda dumb but specially for people on campus and SPECIALLY on fraternities is very rare for u to get kinda together w someone so quick, so I DUNNO WHAT TO DO

- 💋

hiii babes, ofc ofc im always here to help!! and remember not even my opinion should persuade you into anything, cus I can only go off of my own experiences with virignity loss and hook ups 💞 but I hope my insights helpful!!

I lost my virginity at 16 back in high school (a long time ago and not at all saying ur guy is like this ! cus he probably isnt! especially cus hes an adult so I hope to fucking hell he isn’t) and it definitely happened very fast and quick, texted for a few days, made out, and then met up to have sex. in summary it ended with my nudes being leaked around the school and almost a felony on my name (for sending them?) but the thing ive took out of it (and only reason for the story, im srry cus I was so young so it might seem weird to include) n held close is to remember trust is one of the most important parts of sex really! because your putting your pleasure and body into someone elses hands, but also your emotional trust because sex is so much more than just getting physical for a few minutes, and its important to remember that the lingering thoughts shouldn’t ever be negative, or the guy broke the trust you put in him. truly the after sex reaction is just as important as being taken care of during. in my experience, because I didnt know the guy well, I went into it blind not knowing what I total asshole he was.

and trust, in my eyes, means knowing you’ll be treated right afterwards no matter what, even without a relationship basic aftercare if the bare minimum. and to me it doesn’t seem like you are convinced he’ll do that for you ! so pls pls be careful 💞 who knows ! he might be an amazing guy but if you arnt ready to take that step yet, don’t ! because the good ones are always willing to wait. I would say text him/talk to him in person if you have to too. because and I’m hoping not but you never know, his and your friends might have ‘talked’, and sex might be on his mind too. so if you feel comfortable, get on the same page with him with whatever you decide angel !! you deserve to lose your virginity and be glowing afterwards, its so much better than regretting it 💗 whether u choose to get to know him better or lose your virginity to him, stay safe bby and use safety <3 (pls make sure to discuss possible STD history on his side too btw !)

hope this helped a little love, love you and never let anyone pressure you please, cus fuck that

#my pretty 💋 anon <3

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theladyinwhite13 · 7 months

Note

Hey! Ghost, bonfire and cobweb for the ask game🎃

ghost - is there someone that you miss having in your life?

honestly no. there’s a lot of people that have fell out of my life, and I typically miss them for a while, but in most cases there’s a reason we don’t talk (whether it was their fault or mine) and I don’t think it’d be healthy for me to miss them, bc I might try to justify things that I shouldn’t justify. and honestly I’m better for it. and some people I simply don’t talk to anymore and it’s not really anyone’s fault, which kinda seems like a blessing in disguise for me, bc if we weren’t close enough to make the effort to say in each others lives than I don’t think it’s a relationship I need to continue. like my childhood bff (who I was really close to until about middle school) I moved and we fell out of touch but in hindsight, we wouldn’t get along now! she’s VERY christian (which isn’t a bad thing in itself!) but I have a lot of religious trauma and think I staying friends would’ve been really unhealthy for me! I’m a big believer in fate, and I think I lost certain relationships for a reason, even if I’m still not sure of the reason 🤍

bonfire - describe your dream house.

it’d be the cool aunts house!! I would put checkered pink tiles in my kitchen!! and I’d have the coolest vintage furniture!! there would be crystals EVERYWHERE and I would have fresh muffins on a tray in my kitchen!! I also have always liked the way houses with black exteriors look!!

cobweb - (if you’ve graduated) do you miss high school?

I haven’t graduated yet, but i’m currently doing some college courses and I’ll start my degree next year!! honestly I won’t miss the awkwardness of my earlier teen years AT ALL, however I was always really into math and so I had five math credits by the time I was fourteen, anyways I don’t take any math classes right now and when I start college, I’ll be a communications major, and I don’t think I’m gonna be doing many more math classes in my life, which I’m weirdly sad about? like sometimes I just want to do a geometry lesson and I DONT KNOW WHY, so yeah I’ll miss high school math I guess lol

#asks <3

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01tsubomi · 4 months

Note

hi!! if you dont mind me asking, how did you manage to end up teaching in japan?? ive been researching but info online is so extense and overwhelming and i never have good answers....

hello!! first of all i wanna say i understand the stress - i applied to j/et first and was going to work on backups like int/erac and private hiring if that didn't work out and i'm always thankful that i didn't have to. honestly now that i'm here it feels funny that i stressed out so much during the application process bc i always find myself thinking "damn they'll let anyone in" (often about myself lmao). it can be really odd and unexplainable who j/et does and doesn't take but japan needs a lot of ALTs to keep the system going so if you've got the enthusiasm for it there's definitely a place for you!!

i would definitely recommend trying for j/et and int/erac first before worrying about the other options!! since j/et has the biggest reputation ofc there's the double-edged sword of it feeling the most prestigious and hard to get into but again they do hire a ton of candidates every year, plus it has the highest guaranteed pay and takes care of so much for you pre-departure. idk where you're at in life/when you'd plan on applying but if you wanna start the job as soon as possible, int/erac has pretty much a rolling application and their main recruiting cycle is for spring departures (while j/et won't start recruiting again til october, for departure in summer 2025). int/erac gives you a little less pay and a little less initial help, but it's still very reputable. int/erac ALTs also have a few more freedoms once you're in japan bc i believe int/erac has your school hire you directly intead of employing you to your city's board of education. so for example my BoO doesn't let ALTs commute by car, but int/erac ALTs and private hires don't have that restriction. knock on wood, if neither of those work out, there are lots of sites like gaijinpot posting private hire opportunities. i don't know about the competitiveness of those and they do often require you to sort out visa application or housing on your own, but opportunity is always out there! seriously though i wouldn't worry about that at first. that's the backup plan ace up your sleeve

in terms of what you can do to raise your chances of getting hired, again, i think the enthusiasm is the key!! people say the j/et interview is a glorified vibe check bc they've been known to reject people who sometimes seem overqualified for the position (maybe for good reason - the amount of responsibility you get and teaching you get to do is suuuuper variable and dependent on your school, and probably about ~1/3 of my work days every year i have no classes and little relevant work to do, if any). i don't have a background or certification in teaching but i did a lot of tutoring in college and minored in japanese so i had a lot to say about my passion for language education. i know j/et really loves the angle of "what will you get out of the position, and what will you give back" - i can tell you're excited about the idea of teaching in japan so i'm sure you already have your answers!! if you have hobbies related to japan it's good to explain how being in japan would help you continue them. or you can always research what you could do with your non-japan related hobbies in japan! i love cooking and i started taking classes at a chain studio that does a mix of japanese and worldwide cooking. again i know the hit-or-miss element of it is scary but really they just want friendly open-minded people who can share their culture, have enthusiasm about education and exchange, don't mind the hours/job restrictions, and are down to pack their bags and live in japan. if you have any other questions please ask!! i know this is random but i've helped a couple of friends with their applications so if you do want some extra eyes on a statement of purpose my inbox is always open!! cheering for you!! 🎉🎉

#seriously i got. so so stressed out during the whole application process. and nothing any of my friends could say abt how i #seemed perfectly qualified could help #i really do understand the position you're in #but seriously the job is so much lower stakes than i thought intiially and a lot of the reason i say that is because of how little #responsibility i get #i love my school and my teachers are really receptive to my ideas #but basically once you're here all the meaning's gotta come from you #the dreaded Every Situation Is Different applies ofc #but at my school i don't get directly asked for activities much and get told i don't have to come to class pretty often #so if i'm not taking the initiative and making stuff myself or going to talk to the students myself it can be very easy to just coast #which i think a lot of people do. which i can't blame anyone for because 1) i know people who are physically in the classroom less than #8 hours a week #disregarding if they're given an active role in those lessons or if they're just asked to read vocab #and 2) i also don't use all of my downtime on work-related tasks and i honestly find it hard to imagine how i could #i'm just getting into my thoughts about my job now which is something i could talk about for hours and hours #trust me i do really love being here and i actually like that i have to challenge myself to speak up and carve out my place #i'll cut myself off there because i have too many thoughts #but genuinely good luck!! you can do it!!#asks

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ifeltfree · 8 months

Note

Yeah, of course I'll talk with you about it. I'm sorry to hear you're recently diagnosed. I'd say it gets better, but I'd be lying. What does change is that you get tougher, more resilient. If you're lucky, you have people around you who understand and support you well. The seizures never stop being terrifying.

It's an awful disease and one that is extremely misunderstood. Isolating is the right word, for sure. I was diagnosed at 16, so I know how hard it can be to have it as a teenager/young person as well. It feels like it's stealing from you. It is. Don't let anyone tell you any different. Your feelings are justified.

As far as how I cope? Poorly, for a long time, but recently things have been looking up. I was seizure-free for about five years before a recent set of breakthrough seizures (I crashed my car too, lol what a time), so I'm relearning how to deal with the fear and paranoia.

Logistically, I've done a few things:

I was able to get my job to let me work from home 3/5 days of the week.

I sleep. A lot. I still hang out with people and I have a lot of friends, but I had to accept there are things I can't do.

I spend a lot of time in quiet. Overstimulation doesn't help. I found this out the long way - took me forever to realize shutting up one or a few of my senses cut down the brain activity (I'm dumb).

I don't drink. I used to drink - probably too much. Substance abuse and epilepsy don't mix. That wasn't the reason for my breakthroughs, but I do have a little sobriety app. Kinda fun, honestly.

I talk to my friends about it.

That last point is something that I'd never done before this year. It's hard, of course, but I think it's helped that my friends now know I'm having crises of sanity, faith, philosophy - whatever - every day of my goddamn life. It's impossible to live with this disease and not think about what's real, what's not, if I'm losing time, what exactly is a soul...you understand.

Also, seizures are impossible to describe, but I try. That helps as well. Horrifies my friends, but they've said it's ok to talk about.

Every seizure I've had (barring these last ones, or I'd have killed myself) has stolen my personhood from me. I'd wake up as a different person, and then I'd just...live in a stranger's apartment, wear a stranger's clothes, wake up in a stranger's bed. After about a week, the feeling starts to fade but nothing ever goes back to that first reality. That disorientation is, for me, one of the worst parts of epilepsy. It's fucking scary. And if you go through that, I am so, so sorry.

If you want to talk about this more, let me know. I'm much less serious than I seem, and I write like this because I'm overeducated after being scared shitless by my brain. So.

Anyway, feel free to publish this and I hope you feel better soon.

Also, tell your tattoo artist what happened - they'll thank you for not coming in, and they also need to know you're not a flake. Don't want to make them responsible for an unconscious body when they don't have to be! :)

thank you for talking to me more about this. you worded a lot of this really well and its reassuring to know its normal to feel that way that i do about it all. my family thinks im exaggerating it so sometimes i question if im blowing things out of proportion.

anyway, thats terrible that you crashed your car. thats such a huge fear of mine and i cant imagine going through that, im so sorry. its so unfortunate that you have to miss out on things, but im glad you figured out what works for you to keep you in better shape. im gonna try and be mindful about the things you mentioned and see if they make a difference for me, thank you

i dont have much of a support system, most of my friends stopped talking to me after college and i find it hard to meet new people where i live. its significantly harder to cope with shit like this when youre on your own. im sure you get it. and i totally understand what you mean by losing your sense of self. it feels like everything is foggy, all the time but even worse on days i have seizures. it almost makes me mad cause its not fair that after everything else that comes with it, i have to have a diluted watered down personality too.

again thank you for this. ill definitely reach out if the urge arises and you definitely can too. im always open to talk, about anything

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worminmymoutjh · 1 year

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i got my teacher to watch community and we had a really interesting conversation about it that left me super inspired. i havnt finished the show so any speculation or theories could be wrong but i wanted to write this down.

she asked me first “how much of the show do you this is through abeds perspective” but my attempt to answer it wasnt productive so she asked me “what percentage of the show do you think is just references” and then asked me if i thought that there were so many references, not just from abed, because abed is the main storyteller and we are seeing the group through his perspective. i dont know if this is already a super big topic in the fandom cus i have watched zero video essays yet but she also brought up that her husband said maybe the cast is filled with famous actors because its a movie abed is making. i think thats just normal hollywood type BS but i like that thought nonetheless. abed is able to express his emotions and better comprehend others emotions though movies, so thats how hes able to explore the lives of the rest of the group in that way. even if the show isnt being made by abed, there are plenty of episodes from his perspective, whether its obvious or not. im wondering about Remedial Chaos Theory. is it a glimpse into other universes or is it abeds imagination. i REALLY hope im not just missing something here cus i was thinking about that a lot

she also thought it was interesting how close troy and abed were and wanted to understand their friendship more. i brought up Conventions of Space and Time and what Abeds “friend” said to him. i might not be remembering it exactly right but he said that neurotypical people couldnt understand them. and that troy and britta were gonna go off and live their lives without abed, because abed wouldnt change (hopefully im not getting that wrong). and then it seemed to me, like the message at the end of the episode was that abed needed troy to keep him somewhat grounded. and while i dont 100% believe every neurodivergent person NEEDS a neurotypical best friend (i dont have one and im doing so cool), i told my teacher about that factor in their relationship, and she basically said “do you reallyy think troy is neurotypical though?”. SO FAR it seems like the show wants you to think so. im not sure if i buy it. but i also told her about Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps just cus its funny that the autistic character is the sane one compared to a group of neurotypicals

i also went on my rant about how there MUST be some story about troys family that i dont know about because i know quite a bit about jehovas witnesses and unless he is hiding his life from his family or they are hiding his life from their congregation, there is no way hes an “actual” jehovahs witness. there are PLENTY of things he says in these one off jokes that prove he must have moved away from his family and religion (good for him). the fact that he LIVES with abed and annie would get him disfellowshipped. his closeness with abed would be unacceptable. i also found it strange that he says multiple times that hes gonna be “the first in his family to graduate from community college, cus the rest of them graduated from real college” because going to college is heavily frowned upon in the johovahs witness community right?? thats the reason so many of them get jobs that dont require a degree.

#i sound so pretentious #this is full of grammatical errors #troy and abed #community nbc #community spoilers #im just on my shit and needed to rant this is probably nothing #or worse #im so normal abt this exuse me #imagine if im missing the point of the entire show i wonder

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floridensis · 10 months

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huh. so at the advising appointment i showed this pamphlet i picked up at the science building of the campus with all the good classes and wanted to talk about it and shes like oh you dont want this its a technical degree for getting out in the field after the program with experience were going to do your general AA so you can transfer to a university for yoir bachelors because if you do your AA then bachelors here you can only really go into teaching and i just kinda sat there and didnt say anything but im like thinking the technical degree sounds good? that sounds desirable?

im gonna have to think things out and get more info

i never know what im doing and tbh that makes me always hesitant to DO anything but i got the impression from multiple botanists/entomologists ive met that this school is good for more than just filling out your prerequisites and moving on

i think my mistake was going to an advisor at the campus closest to where i live instead of the good campus. i feel like my pathological avoidance and reason are in agreement that in order to best figure out what im doing i need to make the other campus my main campus and see an advisor there

i KNOW its a community college but i also KNOW it can get me networked and into a job and uhhhhughuhuuhhhgghfggggghghhh

everyones favorite environmental science professor, who i knew from the real botanists/entomologists ive met that i need to get acquainted with, hasnt got back to me about the other beetles i was going to deliver him. i should work out my questions and then bring up the beetles again and then when i bring them to the lab, ask him my questions directly

i just dont know what my questions are

i always feel like i missed the instructions for every single thing in life and it all seems obvious and makes sense for everyone else and i dont know shit

also one thing im not sure what to do about is idk. im not one track minded. theres a lot of stuff id enjoy doing. academically or practically. so she asked me what i wanted to do and i wasnt sure what to say exactly. i dont know i just want to do it and i cant do anything on the experience level i currently have.

#wheres mania when you need it

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mobblespsycho100 · 1 year

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also howww much trauma does toby have LOL that guy is from fox and the hound HE HAS TRAUMA I CAN FEEL IT

Im honestly still working on it but basically I think he was abandoned as a child by his mom (she probably did it to keep him safe, but who knows) (very classic orphan moment) but he gets adopted by a couple and he lives pretty nice for a while!! he even made friends (a total of four friends, but thats enough for him and he's happy about that!) (they move away eventually drift apart) (one of his friends is actually Caden and he had a crush on him but its unrequited <3)

but then through divorce or through something else he gets seperated from one of his moms (sorry gay people T_T🙏) and hes back to living some kind of not very fun life because uhh abandonment moment part 2!!! his other mom doesn't really have a job and she's kinda old so he's trying to help out around the house and find work / get money as well by doing probably dangerous probably illegal things (he has many near-death experiences along the way and i mean Multiple. maybe even a 2 digit number. somehow, he always gets out alive. (its actually because of his unique magic))

anyway uhh his magic potential was acknowledged and he goes to NRC because he got accepted yippee, and he wants to try and make his (still alive, still here) mom happy and try his best in school. he was kinda hesitant to leave her behind at first but his mom went "go for it kid its okay!! u gotta get smarter !!! go to college and get more knowledge!" so he goes. and hes sorted in savanaclaw, he got picked on and ran away from a lotta fights but he toughened up and mostly stays out of trouble.

he meets Caden again and they reconnect though Toby knows he's probably not that important in Caden's life and hes kinda resigned to that fact. honestly Toby's still kinda cheerful and silly somehow like just a silly goofy guy despite a turbulent life not because hes actively hiding the fact that he has issues but because he kinda glosses over/represses them so much that hes convinced hes fine for some reason.

Toby acts very polite and keeps his head down, he's not a troublemaker at all but sometimes trouble just follows him wherever he goes rip. His brush off all the bad stuff/optimistic attidude is kind of why hes in Savanaclaw, he's not really confrontational or like a brave tough guy jock like most of the other dudes. He keeps facing danger and not dying / never sustains any fatal injuries and thats persistent according to the Dark Mirror, i guess.

"How does a non-confrontational person survive in NRC?" i dont know . but hes very nice like Silver and Kalim kind of nice (which is because Tod isn't really a villain) and his grades are average / only slightly above average (A W for him). He misses a lot of people in his life and kind of gets attached to people easily (and sometimes a bit too quickly) but he thinks he's fine and normal so let's not worry about all that !!!

#IIIII actually havent planned a lot of his backstory (which is kinda obvious)#but he definitely has issues and trauma‚ and like kalim he does nott think about it .#''i almost got hit by a train once and had to jump down from a bridge to avoid it!'' says Toby‚ not at all disturbed by this fact #asks #toby rufous #hes silly <3 ty for the ask again this actually helps me trynna develop his character #jamie 🌹🗝️ !#also fun fact he is in the science club. where explosions definitely dont happen every other day or so

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tmabutlesbian · 2 years

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i have SO MANY hc's abt martin's family?? like. they're canon to me now. let me try n tell y'all, but btw some ages are not. still very set but yh. also i'll focuse on his mother's side cause i hc martin as half-polish half-korean, n while he does keep in contact, it is far away. but i guess i'll start this hc list by saying:

the first time martin does go to korea is when his mother goes to the care home (or whatever you'd call it) n he feels safe enough to do so. he's around 22/23 years old. the entire family is delighted to see him and all speak english with him, some more broken than others, but martin did learn korean (i hc that he is pretty good at learning languages) n pleades them to let him use it.

also they were shocked at how old he is now, since this part of the family is the one with the most children, so ofc they dont have time for everyone, but omg!! adult!! has a job!! also they dont judge him for not finishing college, and a lot of them are also fat or chubby. just fyi. when he leaves, they decide to send him soju on any given holiday, his birthdays, his mum's birthdays, etc. to the point where martin Does Not Know what to do with all the alcohol in his home.

martin's polish grandparents have kept their lives very secret due to the fact that they had to run away from the country due to committing crimes. they flew to england, and changed their names. they chose blackwood as the last name because it was an author that they both liked n also the reason why they met. the only reason his family ever found out abt this is because after they had died, the children were cleaning their room and stuff n found some journals with their original names ripped, scribbled, painted over, etc. it's the biggest mystery in his family, right next to what happened to his father

the polish side of the family has 6 children, 8 originally, but one died at birth and another tragically went missing when he was five. it consists of 4 women and 2 men (the two dead children were 2 boys, n according to their ages, these siblings had a pattern of boy-girl-boy-girl, which is kinda funny).

the oldest is Uncle Ron, then it's martin's mum, then the boy who died at childbirth, then twins 1 girl 1 boy, then another aunt, then the missing child, and finally the youngest sister, Aunt Z short for Zelda. She is 12 years older than martin

(btw i did math for this just so yknow) forget what i said abt the ages i got it all figured out SO: (martin is 28 for reference) Uncle ron- 54; Martin's mum- 53; dead son- 21 years older; twins- 47; Aunt- 44; missing son- 14 years older; Aunt Z- 40. i do not have months n shit figured out cuz frankly i dont give a fuck but yh. also his grandma was 23 when she had Ron, his grandpa was also 23 but he is 2 months younger than her

Uncle Ron is a sweetheart and Martin's fav uncle. He has a cottage and a farm up in scotland, with a forest surrounding it, and he has an affinity for befriending the wild animals in it, most importantly, bears, which i just found out do not exist there but tbh theres fear god thingies in this universe so u can fuck off if u pull my none existent PENIS because of this, anyways. he introduced 5 year old martin to them and the mama bear at the time thought he was one of her cubs n almost took him away. Uncle Ron has photos of all of this. martin has those photos on his phone. Also Uncle Ron is pretty lean, more than 2 meters tall, n also ace and pan. He found this out much later in life but he's proud he did and is very happy rn. His voice is akin to Con O'Neill but a lil deeper and with some accent from the years living in Scotland (besides the english accent i mean)

imma skip martins mum, except for the fact that recently i thought of the hilarity of her being bisexual and knowing martin was gay since he was 5, but got meaner when he came out because of bad luck, she also got sicker n therefore her mind deteriorated more then. Martin only finds this out through his Aunt Z when he first started his archival assistant job. boy was going through it.

THE TWINS! i dont have names yet BUT the aunt is known for being a bit bland but nice, with a horrid first marriage but now doing much better with her second husband. she did, however, with the second one, create a HELLISH pair of twins, also boy n girl, who martin babysat Once. never again. she's also bisexual but isnt very sure so she doesnt think much abt it. the uncle, however, went to prison, for aggravated assault and attempted murder (the guy was a nazi and also just a horrible person besides that fact, so he does not regret it); because of good behaviour he got out earlier, around the time martin was 17. he had only been in martin's life since he was 2 so he kinda missed a lot, like him coming out, which he does, which his uncle responds with him telling him that "it's not rly homosexuality if youre on top, i know it, i did that while i was locked up." martin didnt have much to comment but im happy to report that a decade just relaxing and coming back to normal life again has made him realize a lot of things, like the fact that he is gay. he's out of the country, in Portugal, just chilling n living life, still single btw hehe.

the next aunt is the one everyone hates since she is homophobic n racist n just a cunt rly. also shes the only one who is naturally blonde which was just a red flag from the start /hj; everyone else is a raging red head, darker the older you are, the only exceptions being the twins, the aunt is strawberry blonde and the uncle has dark brown hair, almost black. no one cares for the homophobic aunt, since shes also out of the country, somewhere in the USA

AND AT LAST!!! Aunt Z... listen im gonna be honest with y'all, i based her entire personality on Katya, the drag queen, lil bits n bobs, the only difference is that she pursued an art career but was in and out of rehab for most of Martin's childhood, only truly coming out when he was around 23/24 years old, getting back to work and having more sober fun. she is a delight, and isnt afraid of helping martin out with money problems since her time in rehab got her into some great contacts n her art is booming, which also means shes travelling a lot. she is the only one martin truly accepts help from just because she will annoy the fuck out of u otherwise so. u might as well. also, i have some au's where she meets the archival crew and falls in LOVE with Tim n Sasha, she loves them; she is pan, leans more towards girls, and may be non binary but she isnt sure yet, she'll figure it out.

regarding children n cousins, martin is the oldest bby in both families. besides the demon twins, the homophobic aunt has some kids but she had them all the way over on the USA so they dont know them well. the boring aunt, besides the twins from the second marriage, has an older child with the first one, and they are non binary, as well as having a pet frog and snake, whom Martin loves. they're also goth, and remind Martin of gerry once they read his statements. there's no other children.

on the korean side of the family, theres 4 children, one of them being martin's father, status unknown, and their mother is alive. she also cooks very well, tho ofc her children help her as well, but she likes doing things herself. when martin goes there the first time he cried when he ate her food and had to quickly reassure her that its because he loved it too much.

martin's father is the oldest, then a sister, and then 2 younger brothers. i dont have names yet nor ages more because martin also doesnt rly interact with them much, tho he wishes he did.

this is the family with a lot of children. ignoring martin's father, the sister had 4 children, the next brother had 5, and the last brother had 4, making that 13 children. and yes, the two brothers workship their wives, cuz ofmg. the only thing i have rn is that the oldest cousin of martin's from this side is only some months younger than him, and one of his cousins is actually studying art in the UK, so they're pretty close. she's on her last year when martin is 28. his youngest cousin on this side of the family is 13, and martin is his fav cousin btw. mostly because whenever they would all play games, during that first visit, whenever martin would sit out of a game, he'd help his bby cousin cheat and win. all his other cousins are incredibly offended by this.

#tma #the magnus archives #martin blackwood #tmalesbeen talks #tma headcanons #i had to stop here cuz theres a limit????? WHAT #horrible #anyways yh i love them basically

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rosysugarr · 2 years

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its so interesting what u can gather abt someone from their blog like every time i see a post of yours on the dash it's like another little puzzle piece in the Who Tf Is Rosy picture. oh, you're in your thirties and you stay with your family and you stream and you wish you would go outside more. you wish you had more people in your social circle because you dont want to be alone anymore and all your friends live at least hours away. you have a vape addiction and you tried to go to college time after time and it didnt work so now you just sit at home and stream and interact in fandom spaces because you don't have a lot else. shitty home life when you were younger. too much internet drama in the past which is why you stick mostly to tumblr and twitch now. it's okay. you're just another person on my dash and i think that's really cool. keep doin what ur doin.

I. I'm not actually sure how I feel about this message. I mean. It sounds positive! And it's interesting to see someone like. put together so much about me just from glimpses on my blog. It's actually super flattering to the part of me that desperately needs attention to know that someone out there actually like. retains this info I drop about me on here.

I will say, you're missing one piece! I sit at home and stream and stuff not bc my life is a damned trainwreck, BUT because I had to quit my job I'd held for a couple of years because the pandemic was incredibly bad in my area, and I lived with older family and wasn't allowed to wear a mask to work. The only reason I still don't have another job is because I still... live with older family and covid is STILL super fucking bad down here and no one is wearing their masks, and the only jobs I could get around here would be like. cashier or waiter or something, something I would be forced to have contact with a ton of people and then come home to my family and risk exposing someone in incredibly poor health and advanced age to covid. I don't really have much of a choice-- it's either unemployment or risking bringing covid home to someone it would absolutely kill.

I mean I don't owe anybody my personal info but I feel like that is an important thing to note. mostly because I promise I'm not as pathetic as I seem lmfao I HAVE had jobs in the very recent past, but. yknow. covid ruined everything.

#rosyanswers #who tf is this even

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lastwave · 1 year

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do all the asks for dnd renfield i double dare you

DARE TAKEN.

1: How did you come up with your OCs name?

tha dracula special interest

2: Does your OC have a theme?

OH I JUST TALKED ABT THIS!! we decided that this piano of sigmas theme is very him

3: What is their Class?

SOULKNIFE ROGUE. he was going to be a college of whispers bard but then his charisma needed to be shit. also soulknife is cooler and directly tied to the dracula curse (haven't figured out the exact details)

4: What is their Race?

human. lol

5: Are they from a Module or a Homebrew?

the Heckna! module :)

6: What TTRPG are they from? (D&D, VTM, or something else?)

D&D!

7: Have you gotten to actively play them/introduce them to the story yet?

ive rped as him so ya!

8: What do they look like? (Do you have art of them? Are you open to fan art?)

ohh ok ok. so u know my dracula renfield design? that but he has multiple outfits and he dyes one half of his hair brown because he has trouble coming to terms with the fact hes old LOL

9: What is their personality like?

answered this bad boy

10: What’s their relationship with their parents like?

oughhhh god. ok. he has very mixed feelings on his birth parents. they did what was best to keep him safe as a kid but that doesn't mean it didn't hurt (see iliveinprocrastination's ask abt number 11 for context). he has had a lot of parental and mentorial figures in his life tho and i think he loves all of them. and misses them very deeply

11: Where did they grow up? Do they miss it? Would they ever go back if they could?

answered this one<3

12: Did they have any backstory adventures before joining the party? If not, what were they doing before they were introduced?

ehhhhhh? they werent really adventures but he did have an eventful life pre campaign due to being a traveling act (escape artist & contortionist)

13: What is their alignment? What would THEY say their alignment is? Does it matter to them?

answered this bad boy too

14: Are there any secrets to their backstory you know, but they don’t know yet? (Secret parentage perhaps?)

not that i know of. unless the dm has plans i dont know abt

15: Do they have a favorite food?

onion soup 👍

16: Least favorite food?

gooseberries

17: What means the most to them? (Not a person)

BAILEY HIS MEXICAN REDLEG TARANTULA FRIEND

18: Who means the most to them?

hrm. thats a good question. i dont know<3 out of living people probably elaine? first long-ish friendship in a WHILE.

19: Do they hate anything? (Not a person)

gooey textures ?

20: Do they hate anyone?

dracula LOL. he Will hate heckna later but he hasnt gotten there yet

21: Are they currently in a romance? (NPC or PC)

this man is ace/aro (probably more greyromantic but yanno. under the umbrella) so no

22: Do they have any romance in their backstory? If it ended, how did it end?

midlife crisis where he tried to convince himself he enjoyed dating and hookups

23: Do they have a favorite school of magic?

he does not know that humans can do magic yet

24: Least favorite school of magic?

see above

25: Have they ever lost someone important to them?

yea. sorry for putting u in the blender old man its for the themes and motifs and plot

26: If you had the choice, would you rather they have a happy ending, a bittersweet ending, or a tragic ending?

HAPPY. LET HIM REST MY GOD.

27: Are they a liar? Do they lie to the party, or only to others? Do they usually think they have a good reason?

liar is a strong word. he will if he feels its in his vested interest in survival to. hes not a good liar, but hes very good at avoiding truths.

28: What’s the worst thing they’ve ever done? How do they feel about it?

he used to be like. really mean when he was younger in the whole. scaring people department. he probably did a pretty mean spirited joke on someone that didn't end well. i think he feels bad about it.

29: What’s the best thing they’ve ever done? How do they feel about it?

oughhhhh u know? whatever good hes done for other people i dont think he recognizes it because for the longest time he was never able to see the results. im gonna have to think abt this one

30: Who is their favorite NPC? Or PC if they’re an NPC?

bailey counts as an npc right

31: Least favorite NPC? Or PC if they’re an NPC?

unknown at the moment but it will prooobably be heckna

32: If they suddenly lost their class and had to pick a new one, what would they choose? What would YOU choose for them?

he would choose ranger probably. id choose abberrant mind sorcerer because it fucks

33: If they played the TTRPG they’re from, what would they play as?

FIRBOLG CIRCLE OF DREAMS DRUID NAMED FREYA W/ THE FEYLOST BACKGROUND

34: What is their biggest flaw?

answered this and the next one

35: What do they think their biggest flaw is?

see above

36: What is the best thing about them?

he cares a lot for the people around him. he doesn't make it known verbally but u can tell by his actions

37: What do they think the best thing about them is?

he thinks hes soooo funny

38: What would happen if they suddenly appeared on Earth?

he would simply go back to sleep because it would be a dream 2 him

39: If they suddenly appeared on Earth, what time period would you place them in? What location? Why?

victorian era london. puts him back in his habitat

skipping 40 because idk ❤️

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