#i didnt know if i wanted to go with the first one or the second so i went with both

[restlesschilled]

TMagP 013

Note: As Always, I am a backer so this was written 23 April, 2024 and scheduled to be posted on 25 April, 2024

oh god its another episodes written by Alex

awww thanks odin <3

Im dreading this

PRE STATEMENT/ CASE

OHHH DATE TIME

THE FLIRTING

This is so cute but i cant trust it because alex wrote it

"that you dont know how cute you are" adshfjagdhflakshdf

WERE STARTING WITH THE BIG STUFF

"hi im from an alternate universe"

CELIA IS A MOM

JACK IS HER BABY

"i had a while few years when I first moved here"

IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO CELIA OR JACK I WILL RIOT

HOW DARE

SHES A SINGLE MOM

"that depends on your baggage. DISH"

"they were the first ones that didnt want me" oooooooo\

Alice's Parents are dead good to know

"most pathetic vague post shes ever scene"

"more wine" "please"

LENA OFFICE

GWEN MY POOR BABY

"is it my fault?"

MY POOR PRECIOUS GIRL

"were managing the bad guys" FUCK

CASE

this hold music is a BOP

i had to stop and have my friend explain public school in England to me because that is not the same thing as American public schools

oh lovely a "fiance guy"

a hedge fund guy what i mean is a hedge fund guy

Why in gods name, would you use experimental setting on a hedge fund/ investing app… when you have no idea what it does and it has a shit tone of disclaimers??? i get being desperate but that's just stupid

also the irony of this guy saying hes a good person when hes betting on people failing with hedge funds

do people even steal phones anymore?

i feel like they are not worth all that much and just have to many ways to tack them for it to be worth anything unless you are targeting someone specifically

yeah i figured they might have targeted him

im pretty sure this would qualify as inside trading somehow

betting against your own company and than tanking the company is very illegal

pretty sure betting you'll have a shit time and then making sure you have a shit time would be the same thing

basically this man is committing insurance fraud... but through a hedge fund

it just occurred to me hes calling from the hospital that's what the beeping is

also vertigo mentioned

he was attack by computer bugs lol

shitty "finance guy" gets whats coming to him asmr

post statement

okay i know sam probably mean "be professional" like stop with the flirting

BUT WHEN YOU SAY IT LIKE THAT I SOUND LIKE YALL HAVE BEEN HOOKING UP AFTER WORK SOMETIMES.

HAVE YALL BEEN HOOKING UP?

this is how i choose to interpret this this is my new head canon( it was already kinda my head canon)

But if you ever ask me to be professional again, I'm going to have to take a shit on your desk." ALICE

"you signed the official secrets act in your onboarding. And I know all your school friends say treason's 'bussin'' and 'fire', but it won't look good on your CV." i love her so much

"its fine when I say it"

this episode really said fuck capitalism didn't it

also do week need to talk about the fact that celia's son is named Jack Ripley like jack the ripper

WAIT A SECOND JACK IS A NICKNAME FOR JOHN/JON

DID SHE NAME HER SON AFTER JON?

#this show has me in a chokehold #tmagp #tmagp spoilers #the magnus protocol spoilers #gwen bouchard #celia ripley #tmapg #tmagp 13 #jack ripley #alice #alice dyer #lena #restless reacts to tmagp #live #liveblog

[good-beansdraws]

Mutual left this tag on one of my Fuuta analyses and yeah...

Part two of "Fuuta’s central theme is invasion of privacy and he has extreme anxiety over being watched, so it's interesting that we get to pick him apart and see all his worst, most private thoughts" :(

#milgram #fuuta kajiyama #i didnt want to be annoying with a tag but thank you trinipopkt for the original tag :3 #ive never posted something like this so let me know if i need to tag anything #my writing brain may be struggling rn but you can bet im still over here drawing fuuta 😅👍 #part one was the lil moodboard on main #this also had slight oc connections (my brain was going brrr having a scientist oc) but once again its general to the audience overall #plus i was really proud of the composition/posing/colors i switched to -- i was excited to share!! #it took me like 80 years to pick a composition/pose that worked asdfsadsg #and i had to redo all my coloring and shading because i wanted a more neutral sterile science look than what i originally had #anyway it wasnt my usual type of drawing so it was a lot of fun to see it come together! #i did the first version and my partner said it was mean (and against procedure) to keep him awake #but then the second version felt equally mean :(((( so in conclusion rip fuuta #he is my little bug and i am going to figure out what makes him tick

[daily-crabbys]

mmg,, i might hiatus again,,,

I'd hate to do it, but there's no joy in crab posts as of right now, and also as of a long while ago.

Managing messages and responding to people in replies and being tagged and all the stuff in inbox is. a lot.

I never intended or expected crab blog to get this big, and it feels like such a chore to do at this point. Not that I dont like it, and not that I dont enjoy the fellow crab lovers, but it's certainly overwhelming.

That plus other socials and such that I manage and real life stuff is just. IDK, it's a lot. Usually, if I get to this point, I just drop off, maybe delete the account if I really can't stand it, but I'm definitely not going to do that here.

At the very least, I'm going to empty out the submissions that have been piling up, but after that, I'm not sure. I may not even get through all of those, I've already been relying on those for a long time at this point, and I think that's pretty obvious.

It feels like a hassle to deal with those anyways since most people don't even identify what type of crab it is that they submit, so I have to take the time to find it, which is usually not at all easy. There are so many posts that I've just had to guess what to tag it as because I just don't know, and there's no solid answer that I can find, at least not usually.

Which is also partially my fault, I've never said anything about it before, and I never specified it at an earlier time to make incoming ones less stressful to deal with, but even so I just. I don't know, I don't.

I don't know exactly when it'll happen, but it's the most likely thing to happen from here. I think I'll modify some stuff about how I handle the daily-crabbys blog to make it easier on me when I come back, but I'm not entirely sure what that'll be. I've never managed a successful daily posting account before, I haven't the slightest clue how to make it all easier on me.

Sorry that this has gotten so long, I didn't mean to rant. There's just so much that I feel like I need to say.

This isn't something coming out of nowhere, and it isn't going to be immediate. I've thought about wanting to do this for a while, and I know I did this already not too long ago, but I didn't really change anything for myself, so I'm just burnt out a lot faster.

Sorry again, both for the length of this and the fact that it's going to happen, but I've just got to make things better for myself before I carry on long term. I really just fucked myself over by not doing this the first time, but if I don't do something about it eventually then I'll just end up hating this blog too much to continue.

🦀💜

#not crab posting #heads up that this is quite a long post so in case you may not want to read it all(dont blame you) theres just a few things to know #firstly this isnt a random decision i made. ive thought about it for a while and dont think i was ready to come back in the first place #second is that it will not take place immediately! i dont want submissions to sit for too long so ill empty those out before i disappear #this includes a few that i wouldnt ordinarily post or have never found the right time to post. theyve just gotta go #third is that it is no ones fault. well thats not true. its mine. i didnt make changes i should have the first time i went on hiatus #im suffering severely from that now and have burnt out wayyy too fast. which is again no ones fault but mine #im going to change things to make it easier to handle. i need to if i want to keep this going for a long time which i very much do #i just cant when the thought of posting on here every day makes me so unhappy. im just too overwhelmed #im not sure what the changes will be just yet but they're going to be beneficial to me greatly

[roseworth]

the only people that say that comic books arent hard to get into are the people that have been reading them since they were a kid. and the only people that say that comic books are too hard to get into so you shouldnt try are the people that have never bothered opening a comic book.

#as a bitch that got into them like 2 years ago. its fuckin hard #especially if you dont like not knowing things #however its not as hard as some people want u to believe #like one of the first books i read was batgirl 2000. fantastic entry book #first of all its amazing second of all you dont really need a lot of prior knowledge to understand it #but even then. it gets confusing. #since i didnt know a lot about other big events i didnt know what was going on in any crossovers #like ok um why is bruce wayne being convicted of murder rn. #like when i was getting into comics i had wikipedia open for like half the comics i read #i think the hardest part is finding a starting place #then continuing to expand from there. like there’s so much and it’s HARD #and sometimes saying ‘just use a reading guide for a character you find interesting’ um. does not work #my rose reading guide is my baby but it is NOT a good starting point for people that haven’t read comics #anyways i’m sorry this is not meant as a slight to anyone #i just love to give my two cents all the time

[dayurno]

general hcs for aftg zombie apocalypse? me i think kevin would try to be leader but unfortunately no one would listen to him/take him seriously :(

now i think if we’re talking like a few years into the apocalypse then it gets interesting like how the characters would change physically like….and what weapons would they use!! they’d def run into people who use exy rackets as weapons and kevin would be disgusted with them i think.

i LOVE apocalypse aus but none center kevin or write him right i wanna know what you’d think he’d be like in one

SUCH A FUN ASK THANK YOUUUUUUU! first of all your idea for kevin is so funny i have to concede. its true no one would care for him at all even if he tries.... honestly though (thinking hard) i think what kevin lacks in leader charisma he makes up for in the department of giving the rest of the group a Reason To Live and creating schedule and purpose where there is neither, so maybe he ummm...... well he's not gonna be the leader of the pack but he can be like the mascot. the shiny thing to cling to. you know what i mean. kevin's indomitable human spirit!

not to be guy who is kandreil pilled but i do think kevin would be very important for andrew and neil to live beyond the survival! i will put a dollar in the kevin day bird motif jar for this but in a way hed be like their little canary in a coal mine... while the crew travels i think kevin would be the one to point out the scenery or the bits of history along or to go over peoples houses and find pieces of life that are useful and maybe even endearing. and yeah hed hate the racquets as weapons! the complaining and the grumbling about it is not as annoying as andreil thought it would be (they are pleasantly surprised kevin still has it in him to care about anything)

AHHH sorry u asked for fun hcs and i gave you a long poem about kevin day being everyones special little boy lets see hmmm... of course andrew has the knives but i think he would eventually pick up something more violent as the world falls deeper in despair. a mallet perhaps? a hammer? something heavy! neil would i think do well with a gun and not actual hand to hand combat, sniping behind them....... i think kevin would also have a weapon of sorts something like a switchblade or a baseball bat. non-lethal but definitely harmful

#sorry i think kevin would be one of those terrible terrible people (me) who would not want to kill #even after fights i think hed be the person to give andreil the stink eye and ask them why they didnt aim for the leg or the arm #kevin would be actually Very methodical about all of this. have many rules as to when its fair to kill a human and when its not #and of course he has his little list of priorities on what to do. it should go something like this #talking first always. never shoot the first shot! we are gentlemen after all andrew #second if talking isnt achievable and violence has to be the answer #you should always incapacitate first #only when That isnt possible do you actually kill someone. its the last resort. for him at least #obviously andreil dont care but you know #also i think hed be a stickler about burials and funeral rites and sending people off #which drags the journey a lot admittedly #but he does insist. so #its faster if andreil help anyway. and they do. Theyve no choice #asks #kevin #andrew #neil

[hecksupremechips]

Honestly though I think it’s really a bad sign when I look at Shin Tsukimi and literally feel like he’s a self insert 😩

#the klock keeps ticking #yttd #i wanna replay yttd so bad but i also like Gotta play other stuff with the time i have akskks #but yeah the brainrot this specific character has given me idk if I ever really talked about it but it was BAD #i like obsessively played the game in like 3 days and it was not a good idea lol but just like shin #i had to take like a week to recover from this guy cuz i couldnt stop thinking about him and how hes just like me fr #first off just the very inconsistent personality hes got going on that is very me he has these different personalities he wears to cope with #all the traumatic shit happening hes both so helpless its comical and so manipulative its terrifying #and idk its really interesting how like good and bad he is at being manipulative like hes very smart and can analyze weaknesses and lie so #good not even he knows the truth but hes also grasping at straws he doesnt think things through at all #like the second main game he just didnt prepare at all hes fumbling his way through everything its going so bad #he just wants to go home he wants to outdo the game makers but hes being used by them so bad he wants it to STOP #and its just the way that like. it hits so hard cuz you know hes really not a bad person not at all he doesnt want any of this hes just #being horribly manipulated and doing whatever he can to survive but its also really scary how #well hes able to lie and manipulate and claw his way through but hes also weaker than a grade schooler #and you never forget that either and as much as he cheated his way through he still failed it was all just a cheap trick in the end #and all of this hits very hard like his personality is eerily similar to mine and just the way he thinks and acts #cuz im the same like im weak and a dweeb who likes funny cats but im also emotionally detached and observant and selfish #but where it hits the hardest is his relationship with midori like oooof that one was too real just like #the first person who was ever his friend was horribly abusive and treated him like a child and didnt respect any boundaries #and he just got sick pleasure out of seeing shin be upset and he was like. a groomer #and shin was fucking relieved when he died but also kept his scarf and adopted his personality to survive #and still goes by sou after ch2 and the scene that gets me the most is when shin ai is asked about his relationship with midori #and you can just SEE how horrified shin is because his deepest shame his abuse is being shared to everyone without his consent #and hes reliving it all in that moment and literally seeing who he used to be experiencing the abuse #he just curls into himself and like covers his ears and pulls his hair thats literally what i do AAAAAA #im just so grateful for the direction they took this character kokichi ouma wishes he was shin tsukimi so bad #and yeah just like damn. its scary how similar i am to shin like damn i really am going through it huh oof #I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I WILL DEFEND HIM WITH MY LIFE HE DID ALL OF THAT STUFF YOUR HONOR BUT LISTENNNN #have you considered that hes cute and smart and weird and maybe just needs friends who arent assholes

[divorcetual]

The meower

#Queued... technically March 23rd? #I mean its march 22nd in oregon. but im not there rn lolz #either way im late. SORRY !! i forfor to queue on the 20th then i was on planes for like 21 hrs total #well no 5 of those were a layover @ the airport but #ANYWAYYYYY hi future me !!! #Howww was the trip? im on my first (second actually- its 4am of the second day if u coukd the arrival) day in Hong Kong #Its rlly hot and humid so I think im gonna die. BUT ITS ALSO SUPER COOL !! #Even just from the few hours I had out earlier its amazingggg. The lights and the buildings are so cool and theres such a fun but chaotic #atmosphere - idk if its just bcs its a big city or specific to HK? #I loveee large cities in general. New york. Tokyo. HK. thats all of the ones ive been to ig #I havent seen even close to all of HK. Im in central rn but we're goin to other parts later #Dad says the other parts are totally different- Like theres LOADS of gisnt buildings here (WAY MORE THAN U SEE IN ******!!! u know that tho #and theyre almost all residential of the ones I passed. Im sure theres offices n stuff i just didnt see them in the likd 20 minutes cab #ride lolz. U know all tuis already tho #ig what im getting at is HOW WAS THE TRIP !!!!! How was the rest of HK? WHAT WAS KYOTO LIKE?? #augh soo many cool things..... #Also also !! Have you learned any mire katakana? #ive JUST learned the vowel line so maybe u lesrned the k line now too? #I cant imagine school is any different. OHH DID U FINISH THE M P 10P COMIC?? #I started it and got abt one page done on the plane #I think it should only end up being two or three pages idk #Ohh !! Hows the new meds going !! I think u should have ur blood test done by now so do u know if it helped at all? #I hope soooooooooooo #Mm I think thats all I have to say .... NO WAIT HAVE U HUNG OUT W/ JACKIE?? #i rlly want to b friends with her ^.^ #Alright Thats all !! HAVE A GOOD DAYYYYYY I LOVE U #queue drop #weather report #WAIT EDIT DID THE TRIGUN VOLUME COME. HOW IS IT

[munch-mumbles]

ive been a little upset about it all night so i need to write out all the things that happened at work today and are bugging me so i can TRY to get it out of my head and actually RELAX bc i just keep pacing in circles around it instead of just accepting it and moving on

#for context i was working frying chicken today. ok so i arrive and literally all the chicken out expires within ten minutes of each other #meanwhile to remake everything takes about an hour 20 #tried my best to get everything out and replaced and make sure i have enough of everything and then take my break bc with chicken there are #few narrow windows to take your break in you have very little control over when it is #get back and while im getting ready for my next fry one of the assistant leaders comes back and passive aggressively asks 'everything ok?' #and when i say yeah shes starts saying how shes 'just checking' because apparently i didnt have enough chicken out for her liking and went #on about how we're in a chicken drive (I KNOW. I WORK CHICKEN SHE NEVER HAS.) #etc etc. i just say ok and she leaves #like 20 minutes later she comes fucking back to rag on me again about how i need to choose my break times better and i need to have more #chicken out there as back up (extremely difficult bc there is literally only so much room in the fryers. the batches i usually make already #nearly completely fill them up) blah blah and then when i try to explain how i WAS making pretty big batches people are just snatching them #up fast she keeps trying to walk out the door right away and keeps stopping and looking over her shoulder to just stare at me while i try t #finish my sentence #and she just. doesnt say anything in response when i do finish she just leaves #so clearly she didnt want a conversation she just wanted to rag on me #then later for cleanup the timing of everything just kept lining up inconveniently so i kept having to get in and out of raw cleaning gear #and slowing myself down and i end up having to stay almost 15 minutes late to finish cleaning #during cleaning i have to go grab a key to the back door to take out my trash and this one coworker i have was standing in the way of the #door. i say excuse me and she just stares at me and goes huh? #and i say i need a key and she barely moves out of the way without responding and she has a look like im bothering her #why are you acting like im being douchey. i just need a key. thats something she does a lot she acts like im inconveniencing her by asking #basic favors . ive stopped asking her to help me open the back door (sometimes needed if i also have raw garbage to take out and therefore #cant touch the key myself) for some reason she takes it upon herself to almost completely close the door after i walk out so when i come #back i have to awkwardly use my foot to reach around and pull the door open #ive asked her before not to do it and she just ignored me #GRAH GRAH. and then like i said in my last rb i realized while i was drivign home i forgot to wash a damn pan #im mostly worried about it because ive forgotten a couple times in the past too . in my defense its a pan i personally dont use but it just #gets left behind from first shift sometimes and then second shifters end up having to make sure its clean #im just irritateddd and im mad im worried about it all. its all little things piling up on each other #LOL I WROTE A LOT MORE BUT THE REST GOT CUT OUT IG I HIT A TAG LIMIT. tumblr voice ok dude quit your bitching !!

[suckishima]

rrrrrrrrr im so frustrated with my writing. its just been weeks of struggle and whyyyy. idk i think i need to rework or rethink what im going for with this one or something, its like i can feel the threads of the themes i wanna do are sooo close to tying together but it just isnt quite reaching yet and so it reads like a stilted bland mess but the more i stare at it the further away it feels aaah

i know it can get there i kNOW it can, the ending and like aha moment is so cleaaaar that i think its almost too solid and thats why my beginning feels so fucked—like i just keep asking myself 'well if hes gonna get there in chapter 5, whats stopping him from getting there now in chapter 2??' i tHOUGHT i had reasons but now that im there i just keep instinctually writing him to have the connecting/realization moment anyway and like. if that's how it is then what even IS the story??? i need a break

#leaving for my parents for christmas tomorrow and while its always a little lowkey stressful there esp during holidays #itll be nice to at least have a different stress than this one for a few days lmao #mandatory writing break coming at a good time ig #anyway a lot of the real problem is that a big reason i wanted to write this fic is bc i wanted to explore tsukkis mental space during #the ball boy arc bc i feel like its an interesting transitional time for him in terms of like being after his big moment but then #he slightly regresses in that post match bathroom scene until yamaguchi sets him straight and like. i love just how furudate is showing #that growth isnt linear and so i wanna explore how tsukki would feel during the camp (which he didnt seem stoked to go to) #and in contrast with hinata who couldnt go but weasels in anyway and like how does tsukki deal with #that intensity of stupidity and passion in regards to how he feels about his own relationship to volleyball now #like i dont think its a straight line from blocking ushijima -> admitting yeah sometimes volleyball is fun #i think theres some wavering in there and oooo i wanna explore it but FUCK its hard?? #why furudate why does tsukki deny extra practice the first night of rookie camp but accepts the second night?? #i know why he accepts night 2 im excited abt that. i'm big time struggling with pinpointing why he says no night 1 in a way #that doesnt come off like 1 hes fully regressing 2 like im having him say no purely bc thats how it is in canon so magical ~plot reasons~ #truthfully furudates reason is probably just 'was funny to have tsukki and kunimi say no in unison' and it isnt out of character for #tsukki to say no either but i also can feeeel it i can feeel the threads of a solid character developmental reason that will fit with #all the OTHER stuff im also trying to do lmao #i just need to piece it together in the right way in the right order and right emphasis #and its so cloooose rn but ugh it just feels wishwashy atm #and so. i struggle lmao #eesh anyway fun tag rant yay #heres to hoping not thinking about this for a week will help #x #....who wants to take bets on whether ill delete this later lol

[hassianlovebot]

i hope they change dispel arrows at some point,, i feel like they need a serious buff? i was hunting a proudhorn with two other people and we all had dispel arrows (which we used the entire time - no one switched to fine), and that thing was still teleporting... took us from statue garden all the way to the flooded wall... i'm okay with the dispel arrows stopping the magic for a short amount of time and not forever, but they literally felt useless the entire time. i get that they want us to hunt them together and the dispel arrows being too beefy would encourage solo hunting them but like,,, they shouldn't feel useless???

#has anyone else felt like dispel arrows are a waste to make? #like.. it didn't immediately teleport and then it did and kept doing it the rest of the hunt #like im sorry devs but your fancy anti magic arrows shouldnt feel like normal arrows for 99% of the hunt #like i want to clarify - it didnt teleport for One second and then immediately did and kept doing it #again im totally cool with the effect not lasting forever but i do think it should last longer than it does now #especially when everyone is shooting it with anti magic arrows and it still does its magic? cringe. #im sure there are more important things for them to work on but i feel like more people would be inclined to hunt- #-proudhorns and azures if the dispel arrows actually did something #like i dont know if its a bug but i hit two different azures with a dispel and both immediately cloned #i literally thought it was a bug at first #and maybe it is?? but i also dont know??? is it an intended feature for the dispel arrows to just not work???? #does anyone have some insight on this... is this on purpose... have the devs said anything about it... #im still going to hunt the magic animals because i like hunting but ik there are a lot of players who arent going to bother #because its just not worth it #and slightly unrelated but i do feel like the antlers and tail should always drop for the proudhorn and azure #if we're going to go through the pain of being run in circles for these things i think we should get guaranteed good drops aldhg #its kind of insane that we dont already actually #like im willing to trade less meat and fur if it means guaranteed antler and tail

[hanaasbananas]

people who leave 5 star reviews without saying anything are so interesting to me

#banana speaks 🍌 #I also do this when i can't think of anything but #this is specifically ab that book i published on amazon way back when #got curious and looked it up and??? it has a 5 star rating from 2 reviews but none of the reviews SAID anything #and its funny to me bc um #exactly 3 people got it hahsgdgs #i want to pick those peoples brains to know what they thought #which story was their favourite? one of the ones i wrote? or my sisters? or my dads? #this book was an assignment for my publishing as an industry class at uni and i remember asking them to contribute to it #and then using a story i wrote for a previous assignment for my first one #panicking bc i gave my sister a word count & then said she could go over & id edit it down when she asked bc i didnt think she'd go too far #AND THEN SHE WROTE 9K WHEN I ASKED FOR 2.5 #so it took me DAYS to cut it down so it wasnt noticeably longer than the other stories #and then i wrote my second story in the collection 12 hrs before the deadline at midnight and continued editing it on my train to uni lmaoo #which is doubly funny bc i think that story is both amazing and terrible #(you can tell i was uh. 21 when i wrote it is all ill say) #but also i sometimes remember the opening of that story and giggle so

[skylilac]

i love talking to her but we are so bad at talking

#and its not even our fault we’re just doomed by every fucking force ib life #its like i respond to her message trying to start a convo and thats EXACTLY when her moms calling her #ive been free all day but the second sue tries to text me oh fuck i literally have to go #were like okay well are you free in an hour to ft?? and both of us agree and then we FORGET #AND DONT EVEN get me started on like actually talking as in seeing each other as in hanging out #the days shes free im not and the days im free shes not anf the days both of us are free neither of us have a ride etc etc #i just want. a text conversation with her. that is all #i cant keep responding six hours later bc my phone accidentally didnt show me the notif like what even is this #convinced the universe hates us both bc WHY CAN WE NEVER ACTUALLY TALK YO EACH OTHER #AND THEN. she got a haircut like five days ago and she wants me to be the first to see to judge #and she wont take a pic so we HAVE to ft but we literally NEVER GET THE CHANCE #so she literally wont meet up or video call like any other friend like literally no one else knows she got a haircut #bc she refuses to reveal it till i get to see slash judge which is SO. why does life hate us #I JUST. wanna talk to this ONE PERSON god give me a moment when we’re both free at the same time #avery rambles

[july-19th-club]

characters in the x files will just get hypnotized at the drop of a hat. cant relate

#i cant even MEDITATE. states of altered consciousness without the use of like. booze etc are completely foreign to me #cant lucid dream cant meditate cant get hypnotized and dont want to be able to #cant do like. automatic writing or anything like that #i guess you could go out on a limb and call a panic attack a state of altered consciousness but YOU know. none of the on purpose kinds #whenever i watch an x files scene where somebody just gets hypnotized i remember when i was in college #and i was at some event a dormmate dragged me to. very first semester didnt know anybody so i hung out with this one girl #who dropped out in the second semester. and she brought me to this event where they had a hypnotist #and he was like ok im gonna hypnotize the audience so raise your hand if you wanna get hypnotized and ill do it #and then everybody was like doing wahtever hypnotizing stunt he wanted them to do. and they all CLAIMED it was real #and they weren't just........like. playing along #but i just sat there watching like girl what in the fuck am *i* doing here. this is ridiculous

[gonbeeyamada]

i hated shin throughout the entirety of my first runthrough because of the opening scene. i was suspicious of him. hated his guts completely. I cannot describe accurately my initial loathing of him it was bad. then it took me an hour of debating with myself over who to kill in the chapter 2 main game because after his big reveal i had a moral crisis (just cause ive hated this guy for the entire game doesn't mean i wanted him to die yk) then i did vote for him because i <3 kanna

i actually first got into yttd because i saw that shin was the foil character for the game and people kept drawing him with a certain ndrv3 character who i was obsessed with at the time (cringe, but im better now) so i came into the game expecting he was shitty, not to be trusted, and ready to start shit. you could not believe my surprise when i found out he's literally Just Some Guy and not even my favorite character. i love how the game hypes him up so much only to beat his sorry little ass to the ground <3

#first playthough i picked kanna then felt so so so incredibly bad about it so i went back on my save and picked shin #YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND. YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND. I WAS SO SO SO INCREDIBLY DEVASTATED BY ALICE'S DEATH (DIDNT KNOW YOU COULD SAVE HIM) #AND HAVING ALREADY LOST MY FAVORITE CHARACTER I DIDN'T WANT TO LOSE MY SECOND ONE. but the instant regret made me go back on it lol

[segernatural]

what was the first episode you saw

bestie i can't believe you've done this to me

it was 15x19 inherit the earth. live. i watched that trashfire live on a sketchy website link.

#there is a lot of missing context here but. yes. thats the first episode i watched of the show ever. #i knew what spn was im on tumblr of course i did. #and dont get me started on my weird parasocial relationship with s15 that i had while i had never even seen the show before #i heard that s15 would be the last one so i vowed to check in on the tag every time it was trending. as some sort of sign of respect #for trailblazing a lot of fandom stuff #so i literally knew a lot about the plot of s15. i was watching through the window so to speak #i wanted you folks to win. after everything. one last hurrah. i dont know if i believed it would happen. #but damn it kept *going there*. 15x02. 15x03. 15x09. like there was no way right #and then it didnt trend again for a bit so i forgot about it and assumed it ended. but covid was the problem #and then it was like oh its not done. and then. november 5th. tumblr ignited. destiel *real*. i lost my shit. #so i said i have to know how they handle this. & i found a way to watch 15x19 live. and then they *didnt* handle it at all. #this is only overshadowed by my second episode being the dumpster disaster of the 15x20 finale. also live. #which lead to me going. i have to know how we got here. bc the finale sucked ass even *i* could see that. with no other context of the show #and so i started my journey. and holyshit its been a wild ride. #it hurts a lot to watch certain episodes when you already know how it all ends but the episodes you watch are brand new to you #asked #answered #char speaks #spn #destiel

[iamthescalesofjustice]

had a dream segment that was so perplexing that i literally ignored the next part of my dream to sit down and analyze it. 

#on one hand yeah sure what if dean winchester and the yiling patriarch were at canaan house. sure okay why not #on the other hand i dont fucking go to whatever fandom that second character is from and my understanding of the first is derived #largely from osmosis that itself apparently draws almost entirely from early and very late supernatural with massive gaps in between #where its just question marks that ive never cared enough to even make a cursory attempt to fill #there were other characters from other stuff there too its just that those two stood out bc i at least know the other characters #here is the sum total i know about the character called 'the yiling patriarch': they are referred to by this title instead of their name #commonly enough that i have seen it on the internet. they are from something written by the same person who wrote scum villain? there is #apparently necromancy in that setting. and thats it. #the connections i know of between that setting and the locked tomb are as follows: necromancy happens. also many of the characters have #multiple names and titles which they are referred to by which makes attempting to look into the series to get a feel for it and see if you #may want to get into it an exercise in frustration #this is all stuff i hashed out when i was ignoring the rest of the dream as it unfolded around me bc i was busy instead wracking my brains #for it bc i couldnt just look it up bc i would have to wake up to do that and i didnt want to yet if i could avoid it. which was the right #move bc i did end up getting back into the dream plot towards the end but i literally missed a whole middle segment and the introductory #stuff to the scenario of the last big segment before i woke up bc of this. bc i had to process that right after it happened