#because its just not worth it

[hassianlovebot]

i hope they change dispel arrows at some point,, i feel like they need a serious buff? i was hunting a proudhorn with two other people and we all had dispel arrows (which we used the entire time - no one switched to fine), and that thing was still teleporting... took us from statue garden all the way to the flooded wall... i'm okay with the dispel arrows stopping the magic for a short amount of time and not forever, but they literally felt useless the entire time. i get that they want us to hunt them together and the dispel arrows being too beefy would encourage solo hunting them but like,,, they shouldn't feel useless???

#has anyone else felt like dispel arrows are a waste to make? #like.. it didn't immediately teleport and then it did and kept doing it the rest of the hunt #like im sorry devs but your fancy anti magic arrows shouldnt feel like normal arrows for 99% of the hunt #like i want to clarify - it didnt teleport for One second and then immediately did and kept doing it #again im totally cool with the effect not lasting forever but i do think it should last longer than it does now #especially when everyone is shooting it with anti magic arrows and it still does its magic? cringe. #im sure there are more important things for them to work on but i feel like more people would be inclined to hunt- #-proudhorns and azures if the dispel arrows actually did something #like i dont know if its a bug but i hit two different azures with a dispel and both immediately cloned #i literally thought it was a bug at first #and maybe it is?? but i also dont know??? is it an intended feature for the dispel arrows to just not work???? #does anyone have some insight on this... is this on purpose... have the devs said anything about it... #im still going to hunt the magic animals because i like hunting but ik there are a lot of players who arent going to bother #because its just not worth it #and slightly unrelated but i do feel like the antlers and tail should always drop for the proudhorn and azure #if we're going to go through the pain of being run in circles for these things i think we should get guaranteed good drops aldhg #its kind of insane that we dont already actually #like im willing to trade less meat and fur if it means guaranteed antler and tail

[gwyoi]

hi everyone sorry to make another post, but I was sick with a sinus and ear infection that I had to miss 4 days of work to recover from. I just need enough to get out of the negatives and pay for my car insurance, which is $160. I’ll hopefully be getting a second job remotely soon but until then I am a little bit fucked.

4/12/24 - $0/300

paypal - gwyoi

venmo - gwyoi

cashapp - gwyoi

#I tried selling more clothing items but I think I’ve run out of stuff since this time I only got $10 for shoes. #I’ll be selling a watch I got for my 16th bday but I think it will only be worth $80 since its just Kate spade ? but idk if it will sell #soon on Facebook #I feel bad asking again since I had to ask for help because I was really sick in December but hopefully once I get second remote job I’ll #be able to work weekends too #gwon

[agentravensong]

ghost trick is a video game that's about these questions: "when something bad happens to you, what do you do with that trauma?" and "when you do something terrible, when you make a terrible mistake, what do you do with that guilt?". it's about fate and family and hope and truth.

but, equally, crucially, it's also propaganda for the best little doggie in the whole world

#ghost trick #ghost trick phantom detective #it's also about another very good pet but that's getting into spoilers #but yeah. spent my weekend playing this (on switch because my computer can't handle its Sick Graphics apparently) #(it was worth buying twice though) #thanks secret sleepover society and lauren the flute for streaming this #and getting me invested enough that i just had to see the rest for myself asap

[chickenoptyrx]

....I just wanted to draw gators :T at this point these 2 are more 'a representation of my last 2 brain cells' then they are actual characters 😅

#im living vicariously through the cartoon guys #because i want to A. pick up gator (strong man style) #and B. ..pick up gator (hug) #ok but so i recently found out an area where i take stupid little walks for my stupid little mental health #has! GATORS!! (potentially. theres signs.) #and this is great cause seeing gators would def heal me as a person #but ok so when i look for hiking places i always look north cause the terrains more hilly #but now im lookin south more cause turns out i AM in fact far enough south to see gators!! #and yeah looks like theres a handful of nature reserves w hiking trails the same distance away as the little mountain trails i go to #its flatter and the trails are less extensive so ill hafta see if i think its worth it #but then too theres a really big black water swamp that.. further away then i wanna drive.. #but also i drove 5 hrs once just to go to mammoth cave as a day trip so.. we'll see.. #my friend says he wont go w me tho :T he'll just report me missing #this has been a tag ramble about my sudden outset intrest in seeing a gator #my bullshit #lol barely but still #also- i told myself not to over do it drawin the scales or coloring it #and as you can see i dont listen to myself ever #lol they look outta place but idc i got to draw 2 of my favorite characters and also ALLIGATORS :U #living the dream rn

[puppyeared]

fake ep idea + doodles

#i was thinking abt how funny it would be if there was a shiftythrifting blog equivalent in lmk. and half the stuff on there is #submitted by wukong. so i thought a yard sale ep would be funny lol #basically the hoard becomes problem one way or another and wukong figures the best way to get rid of his junk is thru ebay #somehow ends up selling world ending artifacts to random megapolis citizens so mk mei and redson have to scramble to find em #purposely meant to mirror the weekly shenanigans s1-2 style eps that are really goofy (dumpling ep noodles ep etc) #but it gets darker and darker because MK is not fucking ok after that whole thing with the scroll and some unchecked identity crisis #for me id want him to kind of. freak tf out because they have to find MULTIPLE chaos inducing items that could end the world while trying t #be sillygoofy and funny about it. so hes trying to mask his panic with “ohhh guys its just like the good ol days ^_^ remember that ^_^” #ESPECIALLY after that whole thing with the ink scroll. also mei doesnt buy any of it and is worried for him the whole time #as for the B plot it could be monkey king also trying to be very relaxed abt selling 4000 years worth of stuff and tang getting all huffy #like “these are priceless artifacts that could help us learn so much about the past!! wtf man!!!” #and maybe it reveals smth like wukong not wanting to hold on anymore bc his past weighs him down. and theyre all reminders #i think azure mentioned that wukong is sentimental (idk if that was genuine or lying to mk) so that could be touched on to #so basically. the theme would be some sort of conversation abt nostalgia. i think. im not a writer so its very fuzzy in my head #if anyone wants to add on or include their own spin on it feel free. also included undercut redson as a treat somewhere in there #myart #lego monkie kid #monkie kid #lmk red son #lmk mei #lmk MK #lmk xiaotian #lmk xiaojiao #lmk sun wukong #lmk swk #doodles #lmk tang #lmk pigsy #lmk traffic light trio #yard sale ep

[bread-wizards]

I think a lot of the meta about Orym forgets that Orym isn't just an adventurer, he is a former bodyguard. His self worth is tied up in how well he can protect people and especially his loved ones. Thats why he sold his future to a hag, because its all he had left to give in order to be able to help.

Thats also why he seems so angry after FCG's death.

Otohan has killed his husband and father. Then him. Then he is brought back and told she also killed Fearne and Laudna. She killed Eshteross. She almost kills Keyleth. Now FCG has to sacrifice himself to save them all and kill Otohan and Orym was knocked out for it.

His job is to protect people and even with the added power from Nana Morri, it's still not enough. 6 years later and his loved ones are still dying and he can do nothing but watch.

#cr spoilers #critical role #orym #they have all lost people and are all grieving #but i have seen a lot of people saying he isnt acknowledging other people grief #give him a week to cool down #i see this like laudna when the groups rejoined and she was mad at the other team for having a nice trip #bor'dor was traumatic for all three of them for different reason #but her killing him and leaning into delilah specifically set her off in a way it didnt with the others and they got that #thats also whats happening here #otohan dying from a friend sacrificing themselves to save them all sets orym off #its not just grief this is tied into his everything #like i said #i will argue that a good 95% of his self worth is how well he can serve others #he has chosen to be their protector and everyone is dying #there is no closure to be found in otohans death because he failed even with the power from nana morri #and before anyone jumps on the 'orym fans cant take criticisms' #please just block me #i am being reactionary because people annoyed me #let me do that in peace #i wanna be sad about my little guy

[ceniwen]

average friend group

#dungeon meshi #my art #ive been loving standee charms lately #and i also dont wanna make enamel charms #because they turn yellow in time #ive wanted to make dunme merch for so long because i loved tha manga #but from my experience its just not worth it #and a waste of money to make merch #from a non anime series #cough bnha #laios #marcille #falin #senshi #chilchuck #izutsumi #i actually just wanted to draw chilchuk and marcille looking like that #and the rest are just filler

[simmyfrobby]

listening to a sports podcast like: you guys would do numbers on hockeyblr

"(18:50) The not having to share Kris Letang ... That's changed the complexion of the top 6 immensely ... (26:15) There used to be this sharing of Kris Letang ... you could see Sullivan kind of trying to spread him around a little bit and they don't have to do that anymore. Kris Letang, who himself is having an phenomenal season, is now anchored to the hip of Evgeni Malkin. That's a benefit he gets to enjoy 24 hours a day and you can see it in the results. I think you're getting some of that 2009 bully Malkin back ... (38:00) The two of them getting all this time together has been good for both of them, frankly."

#please boys wheres the fic #evgeni malkin and his very own little free use defenseman #who he gets to bully #because its good for. um. morale. #anyway worth a listen if youre like me and just need to be told how wonderful geno is all the time #mr dougiejack dont listen to this they hate your boy #pittsburgh penguins #evgeni malkin #kris letang

[vigilskeep]

lots of people reacting with surprise to the “zevran is 25” post. to be clear iirc this is world of thedas canon so a) i would not expect it to be obvious to anyone who hasnt read WOT vol2 or obsessively googled things and b) i still consider WOT kind of wishy washy canon where like it’s basically fine if you made a different assumption and prefer that. that being said i think being 25 only adds to zevran’s character and that people would write more accurate zevrans if they kept that number in mind

#i think people see this impression zevran puts out of being you know worldly and experienced #and they often end up with a zev who is much more emotionally aware and especially self-aware than i find particularly believable #if zevran is the guy in the relationship who is really easily recognising emotional problems and leading his partner through solving them #hes probably not quite right #like you dont want to overshoot it on the other side and have zevran be #essentially babied by the wise warden who never gets anything wrong because they take their lines directly from a therapy textbook #which i also see but like. there’s a balance #i just think its worth remembering he’s the ‘you dont want the earring you dont get the earring very simple!!’ guy #and is 25 #i think that makes for more zevvy zevs

[yourhighness6]

It's funny to me when people insist that "ATLA was really feminist" as if there wasn't really only one feminist message which was the very generic "girls can fight too" spiel that every 2000s show had going on whenever they briefly tried to jump on the feminism bandwagon or whatever

#the main female characters who ended the show in relationships had all of their depth removed because of those relationships #I'm talking specifically about katara and mai but suki was by no means exempt from this either #also the only way female characters were ever shown to have an empowered role in society was in fighting #whereas male characters were political leaders strategists inventors ect #and its also worth mentioning that even though female characters could supposedly fight just as well as men #there were never any women in high ranking positions in the military and we were only shown any women in the military in breif cameos #and that was only in the fucking fire nation which sends entirely the wrong message #atla #avatar the last airbender #anti bryke #anti kataang #anti maiko #katara #mai #suki #toph #ty lee #ty lee is actually a really feminist character but I would say shes probably the outlier here #sexism #atla sexism #fandom sexism

[jakes3resin]

Hmmm thinking thoughts about Modern Clegan Break Up Fight AU

Just the pair getting into a fight because Bucky wants to go public about their relationship, but Buck doesn't understand why. Their close friends know, and they know. Who else needs to know? Buck asks this, and Bucky says he wants everyone to know. He wants to do all the cheesy romance shit like meeting the parents and siblings and stuff. Bucky wants to go to parties or events with Buck as his date. He wants to go out on public dates where people see them and know. Buck says he likes their private dates, and he likes how they don't have to be a side show for the people they go to school with (university not high school).

They go back and forth until finally Bucky bursts out that he wants everyone to know because he doesn't want to be the one left behind anymore. Bucky's the good time guy, or so everyone who's ever hooked up with him or gone out with him has said. He's scared that Buck will eventually agree with them (like Buck ever would but Bucky is scared). So now he wants to prove to Gale that he's serious about this, serious about them.

But, Buck's scared in his own way. His dad's still in the picture, and he would rather die than let his shitty excuse for a father anywhere near Bucky. Because his dad is the type to show up and try to teach the boy dating his son a lesson. Except he doesn't say that to Bucky. He says John I don't want to go public with this.

Poor Bucky takes that the exact wrong way. Usually he can read Buck like the back of his hand, but right now he's too emotional and stuck in his own head. He can't see past the facade right now. They start to really argue, building off of each other's energy until finally Bucky says that he can't be with someone who feels like they have to hide being in love with him.

Bucky storms out saying they're over. Heads back to his apartment where he tries to calm down and breathe. He goes and drinks some water to calm down. Except he accidently slices his hand open dropping his water glass. He gets blood all over his bathroom trying to fix it. That's how Curt finds him.

Curt is Bucky's roommate. He wasn't even supposed to be there that weekend. He was actually supposed to be in a different state for a concert the next night, but he forgot his wallet and turned back around after only being on the road for an hour. He finds Bucky bleeding and crying his eyes out, telling himself that that's what he gets for trying to be more than a good time. Curt goes into lockdown mode cause that's bullshit. He cleans Bucky up, and when Bucky looks at him with bright teary eyes and says he and Buck broke up, it's heartbreaking. Bucky sniffles and says he doesn't know what to do because he can't face anyone after this. Curt stuffs Bucky into his car and books it. Bucky forgets his cellphone in the apartment in the rush to get out of there. He realizes it a few hours later when it's too late to turn back.

Buck, meanwhile, has had his panic attack and calmed down. He knows that neither of them were in a good place for that argument, and he gives Bucky some space (a few hours) before he shows up to try and talk to him again. Only Bucky isn't at his apartment, and when Buck can't find him at any of the parties or bars on campus or with their mutual friends, he starts to get scared. Bucky's phone goes straight to voicemail over and over again. Buck goes back and breaks in (uses the spare key Bucky gave him) only to stumble upon an apartment trashed and covered with blood. He freaks out and calls everyone he can think of. Everyone joins the search, and it turns into a whole thing.

Hospitals get called, and then the cops get called, who since they're college town cops are suitably useless. Buck spends the next three days thinking Bucky hurt himself or was hurt bad enough he can't make it to one of their friends or a hospital.

Bucky is having a lovely time by the way. He managed to get a ticket to the concert, maybe Curt had an extra, and it's a great band. He's still heartbroken, but sometimes you just have to scream along to some artist you only learned about yesterday cause it's better than crying. He and Curt end up so hungover the next day that they don't get on the road back to their university until it's super late. They don't tell anyone they got back in town and pass out not knowing everyone in their life thinks Bucky is missing.

Bucky shows up to classes the next day, and he doesn't understand why Brady loses his shit when he sees Bucky walking around campus like their entire friend group hasn't been losing their shit all weekend. Brady drags him away even though Bucky's whining about missing his morning class.

Big reunion scene back at Bucky's apartment where Buck breaks down in tears because he's just so fucking relieved Bucky is okay. They work through their shit, and Bucky has to promise never to go on anymore impromptu road trips.

#okay so i have disappeared after bad break ups so to me this isnt so out there #but also i know that doing so is not a normal or healthy response to breaking up with your so #do better than bucky and i folks #also curt blocked buck's number immediately after bucky said they broke up because buck didnt want to go public #he stands on principle also its so he could resist leaving death threats in Buck's inbox for making bucky doubt his worth #so thats why buck couldnt just call him and ask where bucky was #mota #masters of the air #buck x bucky #john bucky egan #gale buck cleven #clegan #john egan #gale cleven #is this dramatic? yeah but i enjoyed writing it so whatever

[moeblob]

Hey so I have to inform you all because I am morally and legally obligated to inform people about this movie -

I have told you before that Clue (1985) was available on Amazon Prime and today I have even better news. I don't know when it was added BUT ! it's FREE TO WATCH (with ads) ON YOUTUBE !

Also it's my favorite movie (this doesn't matter I just have to say it).

Also also just because I found this out five minutes ago it was released on Dec 13, 1985. Which was a Friday. A movie about a board game about murder released on Friday the 13th ? Truly a move of all time.

EDIT: Someone wanted to know if you can watch it with adblock on and hey! You can! (I have watched it problem free)

#moe talks a lot #not art #haha get it a move of all time cause it is ... based on a game..... moves..... #anyway hello please I am requesting people to consider watching this movie i own it twice on dvd and once digitally #and will probably watch it on youtube with ads just because i can because its worth it and i want to enjoy it everywhere i can #until the day i die i will try to open a door incorrectly and my brain will scream at me #LET US IN LET US IN ! - LET US OUT LET US OUT ! #thinking about that time i asked a guy his bday and it was dec 13 and im like oh cool just like this other worker #and he widened his eyes and informed me ITS ALSO TSWIFTS BDAY #and now i am regretting being unable to plug my favorite movie to two men who both knew that tswift had the same bday #i had a CHANCE to say OH DEC 13 THE SAME DAY AS MY FAVORITE MOVIES RELEASE YOU SHOULD WATCH IT #gosh i really will plug this movie to everyone

[the-real-bruce-banner]

Imagine Sydney getting offered her own restaurant and she can have her dream spot and be in full control by a poacher because they want to work with her. The poacher sees all the great work that’s went into the Bear and they head about the dishes she’s made and they want Sydney, and Carmy hears about it.

Carmy and Sydney have that argument that is obviously being built up too and by the end it completely mirrors the “Sydney quitting scene”. Carmy is just angry that Sydney was going to walk out on him and all the work they’ve put in. (It’s shown in the freezer scene that the memory of Sydney quitting enrages him, if you look at the montage). So when he hears the inside scoop from someone else that Sydney is leaving, his eyes go bloodshot.

He ends up saying crazy shit like “If you want to leave, leave. I don’t need you. Just leave.”

And Sydney is confused (to mirror Carmy in the quitting scene) like “What? What? Leave?”

And Carmy is just doubling down and spiraling like Mikey, refusing to let her in, pushing her out. “Just leave, I don’t want you here. So go.”

And Sydney just looks so heartbroken as she collects her things but the silence is palpable. And Carmy is fuming and refuses to look at her like the last time. Later, he runs into the poacher/inside scoop person/whomever.

And they’re like “It’s wild how people work.”

And Carmy is quiet but refuses to acknowledge that he regrets what he said. And says something along the lines of “Sydney got what she wanted. Good for her.”

And the person is just like “such a shame though.”

“What’s a shame?”

“That she turned it down.”

“What?”

“Yeah, she said she didn’t want to leave. That she didn’t want the offer.”

And the whole world just collapses on Carmy because he realizes what he did and what he said to her.

I KNOW ITS ANGST! I know! Fic writers, is this something?

#the bear #sydney adamu #sydcarmy #carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto #sydney x carmy #carmy x sydney #the bear fox #I’m just sick #because this shows love’s parallels #and I LOVE parallels #and if they paralleled the quitting scene but flipped it on its head I would lose my shit #but it would be great cinema #so worth it

[possamble]

do you have any particular thoughts regarding marcille being a half-elf? its interesting to me considering the fact that she seems self-conscious about being a half-elf, but denies it when its brought up

i remember marcille looking visibly uncomfortable over laios simply asking her how old she is, which i think the only reason she might feel nervous about this is because it might reveal her as a half-elf to him.

she's never corrected anybody whose called her an elf either.

never mind the circumstances of the reveal, in which thistle goes on about how half-elves are inferior and accusing her of wanting to become full blooded elf, she seemed particularly upset like he struck a nerve-

i wish the half-elf thing was built upon more. also, underrated marcille line:

okay so i revisited this sequence just to make sure I could back myself up and it's just... man. there's a lot going on.

the first reaction we get from Marcille is this huge panel that takes up half of the page

she is viscerally affected. flushing to the tips of her ears with the intensity of it. and we see it again, a few pages later

so it might seem like she's embarrassed about it and lying to herself, but... I really think it's just that Thistle is accidentally hitting sore spots. If you really look at what he says to get these reactions

"you'll live out your entire life [...] and die that way too"

"a hundred years from now, nobody will be there"

Hear me out. I think, if he stuck to harping on about her inferiority without bringing up how terrifyingly long-lived she is, she wouldn't have been as bothered. But right now, Thistle is accidentally hitting all the marks on Marcille's deepest fears-- and this is after the Winged Lion promised her that her dreams could come true in an extremely vulnerable moment, so it also hits her slightly guilty conscience as well.

I do truly believe that Marcille isn't bothered about being a half-elf the way that people assume she'd be bothered by it. To her, the biggest problem with being a half-elf is that it's isolating.

On one hand, it's not hard to imagine why she'd distance herself from elves in the west. A lot of them can clock her as a half-elf on sight, unlike other races, and therefore she's always branded with this weird stigma of being Othered -- I would even say that she considers herself lucky for being born outside of elven culture instead of having to grow up in it. I mean, just... look at the way elves talk about her.

Skipping past the uncomfortable implication of what 'not tolerating the existence' of half-elves would actually entail, this is incredibly fucking annoying. You can see why she wouldn't want to be around elves much. You see a lot of Marcille reacting badly here, but honestly, almost all of it can be attributed to her freaking out that her bluff completely failed. She's honestly more paying attention to Izutsumi's footsteps and trying to coordinate an opportunity to escape.

And in the end, you see her built-up frustration at being asked if she wants to be a full-blooded elf like 2-3 times in a row.

Yeah, yeah, "the lady doth protest too much," and all. But we know Marcille. We know that she's a lot more embarrassed and horrendously unconvincing when she's being prodded about something she's actually self-conscious about.

Moving onto the flipside of things, it might seem weird that she "pretends" to be a full elf around other races, but it's not really that strange if you think about it. Again, people are weird about her being infertile or whatever, and a lots of them don't even know much about what sets half-elves apart from everyone else. I mean, look at how uncomfortable Laios is just asking her about it

and look at how exasperated and resigned she looks

And like... she's right. Where would that come up in normal conversation? Why would she go out of her way to tell them? She's functionally a normal elf to other races anyway -- got the ears, the abnormally long "childhood", and the huge mana capacity. Unless it's directly relevant or important for people to know, I don't think it's all that strange or indicative of insecurity that she prefers not to bother with it.

(This combined with her sense of being an "outsider" to elf culture also explains why she thinks elf superiority is embarrassing. She sees the way elves treat short-lived races from the "outsider" perspective nonetheless, and thinks it's obnoxious; especially more so because she usually has to play the elf around short-lived races and deal with the reputation of arrogance that elves have built up.)

The sad thing is, this all means that... she doesn't actually fit in anywhere. She doesn't like going out West much because of how elves treat her. But she's also an outsider in the continents she was born in, treated like this exotic long-lived alien choosing to live among short-lived races for some reason. She is always an outsider, the Other, no matter where she goes. Add in the fact that she'll live longer than literally anyone she knows, and it's honestly kind of heartbreaking.

And I think that's the crux of it. Marcille really doesn't act like she's at all self-conscious about being a half-elf because of any feelings of inferiority or being half-made or whatever. She considers herself a perfectly legitimate being and might even, in some ways, consider herself superior to normal elves because she's not blind with elf supremacy or whatever. (And whatever "elven biases" she displays, all of them are born more out of the fact that she's kind of bad at conceptualizing how other races age and mature compared to herself, not that she actually considers herself better or more mature simply for being an elf.)

I think that whatever self-consciousness Marcille has about being a half-elf is, instead, related to terror and loneliness. The reminder that it ensures she'll never truly belong anywhere for the rest of her very long life. The reminder that, in truth, even she's not actually sure how old she is by other races' standards (hence the discomfort when asked how old she is). She doesn't want to not be a half elf, or be a full elf or full tall-man-- in her ideal world, she's still a half-elf. She just gets to live out her life at the same pace with the people she loves and doesn't have to say goodbye again and again and again until she dies.

and one last very important panel, right after Mithrun tells her that all her desires would be devoured

In her ideal world, she's still a half-elf and reality magically starts marching at her pace. But failing that, the second best thing is that she's still a half-elf-- but one who is able to accept reality and let go of her fear.

(But the rest of the story pans out the way it does because, to Marcille, taking reality apart and reshaping it was less scary than simply and fully reconciling with it.)

#asks #dungeon meshi manga spoilers #marcille donato #manga panel analysis #this is probably riddled with typos sorry #readmore cut bc it got long lmao #i ended up babbling about it bc it's such an important character detail to me #bc like... wow. she's so normal about it. she's literally just chilling. #the only thing that really bothers her is the material reality of it and how people treat her #the stereotypes the stigma etc. etc. #otherwise it just.. #literally doesn't factor into her criteria for self-worth at all #the basic truth is that marcille likes herself on a fundamental level #she's not plagued by a deep and festering self-loathing the way a lot of characters in her archetype are #she likes herself and is proud of her successes and accomplishments #its just that shes terrified of failure and can have *episodes* of self-loathing when she fucks up #but who doesn't yknow #i know its a very slight nuance that makes very little difference in how her 'overachiever' problems manifest but its there #the sword of abandonment issues that hangs over her head has nothing to do with her self-worth or self-esteem or meeting her own standards #it has to do with the fear of not living up to *other* people's expectations and not being useful enough to be worth keeping around #she's good enough for herself but she's always so so so scared that she's not good enough for other people #i wont say much about what ryoko kui is saying using this as an allegory for real world racial biases but #dungeon meshi's treatment of marcille's relationship with her being half-elf is so incredibly important to me because it gets it so right. #a trauma about inferiority or being a half-being isn't inherent to the experience of being 'of two worlds' at all #that's something that's unfairly drilled into people by their environment #the *inherent* anguish is the loneliness. the constant longing. the fact that you are always homesick no matter where you are #always just a little bit of an outsider and never fully at home #and dungeon meshi gets that. #edit: cleaned it up a little

[commsroom]

there's an interesting statement being made about identity if you accept all of the wolf 359 characters are equally themselves as of the finale: eiffel is form without memory; hera is memory without form; lovelace is both, but without continuity of experience; minkowski is both with continuity - and she's still not the same person that goddard recruited. if we're never the same people we were, but we're always ourselves, then the only way the self can be defined is through its own assertion - and maybe it can be argued that "my name is-" (and later, being able to say "my name is hera" reintroducing herself to pryce) and "i am captain isabel lovelace. no matter how hard you try, you are not taking that away from me" and "without me, who are you?" / "renée minkowski, and that is more than enough to kick your ass" are all the set up for (and part of the answer to) "am i still doug eiffel?"

#wolf 359 #w359 #it's about accountability but also about inevitable change and the willingness to learn from the past #and change for the better #holding those maybe contradictory ideas in your head #that we can't escape who we are. the limitations of the self or the people we've been in the past. but also #that there's no permanent state of self we're bound to #that the self is a constant negotiation of presentation and communication with others and can't exist in a vacuum #but also that it is about inherent worth and self-defined and self-named #i think that line is so interesting. 'we can't just change who we are but we get better.' #because depending on how you interpret it it either supports or contradicts this philosophy #and i think the difference in how hera interpreted it vs how maxwell might've meant it is part of how they misunderstood each other #and why it's an idea that stuck with hera and that she returns to. and feels like it was a lie. after maxwell betrays her #but that's another discussion maybe. #and also of course. the significance of names in wolf 359. but that's a whole thing on its own too.

[flickerintwilights]

on the road to hell

#hadestown #art #my art #tag ramble as promised: #firstly #i’ve been thinking about redoing this as digital art #(like - mostly the same but cleaner and with some of the details fixed) and probably will if i have time #because i like this composition a lot #but! for now i am oddly happy with how this turned out despite being traditional art/watercolor (no undo button. sobs.) #and it Is a noteworthy day for hadestown with lola tung and lillias white departing #(this is Not meant to celebrate them specifically - i used the obc as reference not them - i just think it’s a nice day symbolically) #so i thought i’d put this out. whatever. yknow. #oh a second thing i will say is that this was a great excuse to check out the slime tutorials on youtube #i spent like 9 or something hours on this :/ so. plenty of time to have things on in the background while i was working. we love slime #thirdly! two things i feel like are worth mentioning rq for Symbolism: #wait for me reprise (intro) originally having wedding procession imagery (from anaïs mitchell in working on a song) #is what first made me desperately want to put the flower/petals on the edges (it still fucking haunts me) #though it was a solid composition choice in general i think #and i mean. clearly the carnation should be prominent. it’s the carnation. from hadestown. #i don’t think the wedding procession reference comes across the way it turned out but that was the first thought #NEXT ouroboros. the snake devouring its own tail (i legitimately forgot that this was why i first drew the rattlesnake that way but #fundamentally i really did just want its tail and head to point to each other lmao)