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hanaasbananas · 9 hours
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Oh I’m an asshole.
So today pulling into Stop and Shop, this lady cut me off and nearly drove into me, and then, when I tried to pass her, she swung to the right and nearly hit me again, and then flipped me off.
So somebody is having a bad day and taking it out on me. That’s fine. It’s harmless, and I don’t know what’s going on in this woman’s life. I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt she’s not just a piece of shit and is just having a bad day.
But then I park and she follows me, and gets out of the car and starts swearing at me and getting in my face.
Now I go from “indifferent” to “I’m gonna fuck with this woman’s head.” Now I would say I’m a gentleman of size, and in all black and bemohawked I probably look spookier than I actually am, so props to this lady for getting in my face. Now of course I’m not going to hit her, or even threaten violence. That’s shitty. Nobody should get threatened with violence.
Instead, I take a step back, narrowing my eyes like I’m studying her face really closely, and then I touch one of the several piece of “occulty” jewelry I’m wearing (none of which, by the way, are magicked in any way at all). Then I mumble some nonsense under my breath, and then make the fig gesture and the horns at her.
She stops, wide-eyed.
“WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST DO TO ME?”
I chuckled, and shake my head. “Nothing at all.” I say in a not-terrible convincing voice. “But every time something bad happens to you today, you’re gonna be thinking of me.”
Then I winked at her, and walked away.
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hanaasbananas · 9 hours
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it's always bad for adults to interact with minors, which is why when I was born my mother was positioned at the window and I was birthed down a giant slip n slide that safely transported me to the hospital grounds, where I was quickly accepted and raised by a gang of feral babies who were born under similar circumstances. and that's why my posts are so bad
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hanaasbananas · 11 hours
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“Don’t wait until the last minute to do your assignments!”
listen. I don’t. But I am always trapped in a vicious cycle.
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And the only thing that breaks this cycle is the dread of an imminent deadline
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hanaasbananas · 12 hours
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Its crazy how jack blacks kid just looks like if jack black had a son
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hanaasbananas · 12 hours
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My favourite underrated kaz moments from the books pt 2
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hanaasbananas · 17 hours
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Israel has killed more children in Gaza since October than in four years of worldwide conflict
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hanaasbananas · 17 hours
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[Reblog for a larger sample size, etc etc]
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hanaasbananas · 19 hours
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Ella Enchanted book of all time. Linguist Ella. Banner-sliding friendship. Thinking up clever ways to skirt orders particularly to frustrate Mandy & demonstrating active resistance. Finishing school frustrations. Making the choice to run away from finishing school rather than be actively cruel. "Happy to be obedient" arc. The letters. Breaking the curse by resisting something you want more than anything because you know that it wouldn't be safe to take it.
How does it feel to be the most correct person on this website, Anon.
(May I also add: Prince Charming of color! It's like two throwaway lines, but Char is not white in the book!)
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hanaasbananas · 19 hours
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Ella Enchanted really said True Love will break your curse—not just because it happens to you but because of the strength of will that love will give you. You will break your own curse because the love in you is stronger. and I never recovered
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hanaasbananas · 23 hours
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tvl adrien in marinette‘s pov is so funny bc he seems almost healthy and well adjusted. he’ll be like hey marinette if you’re upset with me for any reason please don’t try and protect my feelings :) I want to know so I can fix it :) and then u get to HIS pov and he’s doomposting about it. contemplating death for causing her a slight inconvenience
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hanaasbananas · 23 hours
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top 10 most divorced men to ever live right behind henry viii
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hanaasbananas · 23 hours
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downside: going to have to include a picture of the Giza pyramids in the slides for the lecture upside: i get to give people a crash course in why perspective matters in two frames, because
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followed by
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is such a funny sequence
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hanaasbananas · 23 hours
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hanaasbananas · 1 day
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y'know how in some areas like south asia, the caribbean, and so on, feral dogs are a serious pest issue, and some people kill them, eat them, etc? and yknow how that fact absolutely horrifies people in countries like the US? i wonder how many of those dog defenders fucking hate pigeons.
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hanaasbananas · 1 day
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The amount of Ws this woman has racked up in such a short amount of time are astounding
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hanaasbananas · 1 day
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no cause some of the shit y'all are saying has me genuinely worried that you don't understand the difference between immigration and SETTLER COLONIALISM. y'all do realize that if jewish people just mass migrated to palestine and lived peacefully among palestinians as neighbors and countrymen, then none of this would be a problem. right? you get that, right? you get that our issue was never "there's too many jews here" but rather "why am i getting kicked out of my house." RIGHT?
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hanaasbananas · 1 day
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Today I called a girl homophobic as a joke and she almost started crying
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