#i could write an essay on why this ship is much more flattering to their characters than being shipped with gojo | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shuxiii · 5 months

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hey shuu!! it's me hahaiahsja twice in a day who would've thought

this might be a bit (a lot) big because I just finished my run through of next door and cat page after so long of neglect due to school, so here's your warning for that!!

I'll begin with cat page because I'm excited ashdjam I'm not even going to lie one of the first reasons I put a hold on my reading of it was because the thought of hating cats hurt my heart in many ways and I wasn't prepared for it (even if it would pass and it wasn't anything too evil aaaahasjje) but haerin being petty in the latest chapters had me laughing so much it got me excited to go back to reading cat page as soon as I could!

it makes me cackle so much how cp!yn changed completely because of a crush hahahakshaksj although definitely not in an extreme case like hating cats I too have changed my ways to please a crush in the past and it's so funny seeing this from an outsider perspective I'm loving it (also please don't ever change yourself for someone else unless it's actually a bad habit because people should love you from who you are)

also a bit of a side note but everytime hyein is the younger sister it feels like she's either too stressed or being pulled into complicated stuff that it's none of her business I never know if I should laugh or be concerned tbh 😭😭

and sebastian whiskers is such a funny but actually good name you're a genius shu, a genius.

also also!! haerin being jealous is so funny I'm having so much fun you're insane with humour aaahahdjdj

but I'll stop for now and begin talking about next door already before this actually becomes an essay (I'm so sorry if this is way too big but I don't know if I'll have time today to send more asks so it's easier to send everything together while I can 😅)

now I'll begin this part saying that I love learning new words 🥰 everytime you write a word that's not in english and explain to us the meaning I get all tinglish with excitement because I love learning about other languages and cultures and it's so cool and aaaaahahdhsksj and there's so many of them in next door I love it hihi 😊

and as a musician!! I actually got a bit offended when han said "stupid guitar" on the first chapter I'm not even gonna lie but jake irritates me so much more like mate excuse me I'm trying to enjoy my childhood ""enemies"" to lovers drama can you please move out of the way???

but anyways! poor haerin and dani being pulled into their sisters dramas they deserve a hug and a ice cream each!!

"excuse me?" "you're excused" had me seated with a big bucket of popcorn so hard why are you so good?? aaaaaaahskahdhsk shu you– you bring an unhinged expressionism out of me it actually scares me I love your stuff so much here's a heart 💜

oh! also also! the fact that next door!han is blonde is such a good character detail giving how her personality is here it fits so much!!! you and your amazing brain are so lovely aaajashdj

and their moms and minji being the biggest hanyn shippers they're so cute 🥰 like that's an unspoken rule I have with my stories I think all my childhood friends to lovers have their parents shipping them together because it's just so funny to write that (specially the grandmas I love making grandmas ask every family gathering if the characters are already dating aahskajs)

anyways! I'll speedrun this because it's already feeling like an end of the year school essay and I don't wanna give you that kind of headache hahahaksjdjq

nd!jake makes my blood boil how does a person do that to hanni???? he's so heartless souless foolish I hope his layla bites his ankle so he can't play anymore >:(

well I guess this is it! sorry for it being humongous 😅😅

have a good night amazing shu!!

bye bye shu <3

Oh my god UWBSUAHAHA THIS ASK IS A LITERAL ESSAY 😭😭 SOME KIND OF LONG FIC 😭😭😭😭IM SO FLATTERED AUZBAUSHSH IM EMBARRASSED U TOO UR TIME TO WRITE FOR ME… USZHSUHS I HOPE U ENJOY READING MY SMAUS AND IM SORRY IF I CANT WRITE AND RECIPROCATE UR LONG WORDS BUT THIS MADE ME GASP and i hope u have a good day too AJDHSUS IM FLATTERED U LOVE MY HUMOR AND WRITING LOVE UU

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ibijau · 3 years

Text

Futures Past pt 20 / on AO3

(posting early this week because I might not have time tomorrow)(also, because of the upcoming xisang week, I’m not sure yet if I’ll update this fic next week)

With some help from Su She, Nie Huaisang gets his wangxian ship sailing.

Nie Huaisang guiltily twisted his hands as they left the classroom, already half crying as Wei Wuxian finished retelling his first day of punishment with Lan Wangji.

"I really am so sorry, Wei-xiong!" he lamented. "I really wish I could help you. Maybe if I could find a way to copy part of the rules for you and pass them to you…"

"Lan er-gongzi would surely notice," Meng Yao softly objected. "And then you'd both be punished again."

"Aren't you busy enough with your own punishment anyway?" Jiang Cheng huffed. "You'll be lucky if you can even attend your music lessons with all that extra homework you were given, right?"

With a miserable sigh, Nie Huaisang nodded. Cheating was more work than he'd thought, and he'd have to find a better way to do it if he were to pass that year. Though really, it had been Lan Wangji’s fault for joining the lectures, which he hadn't done the previous year, and also Wei Wuxian's for taunting Lan Wangji by looking at him. Of course Lan Wangji had gotten curious, and he'd noticed the cheating, and…

For some reason, Lan Qiren had decided that Wei Wuxian was the instigator in this business, so he'd been punished the hardest. But Nie Huaisang had been given a lot of essays to write, and he didn't dare to ask Lan Xichen to help, fearing to be scolded for his dishonesty. Meng Yao and Jiang Cheng, who hadn't cheated at all, offered little sympathy and even less help, the first because he was still catching up, the second because he didn't feel like it. Hopefully Su She might give a hand, if Nie Huaisang cried a little.

"It's really not so bad," Wei Wuxian said carelessly. "I won't say that first afternoon in the library with Lan Zhan was fun, he's even more boring than his uncle, but I think I can entertain myself. I bet before the month is over, I can get him to break his self control. Now that'd be fun!"

Nie Huaisang stopped on his tracks and grabbed him by the arm, not a trace of tears in his eyes.

"Wei-xiong, why do you have to antagonise him so much?"

"Why wouldn't I? I'd like to be his friend, but he's too stuck up. Pissing him off is the next best thing."

Baffled by that logic, Nie Huaisang looked at their two friends. Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes, while Meng Yao was trying his best not to smile.

"Wei gongzi is like that, don't question it too much. He likes to tease people, and thinks everyone understands it's meant in a friendly manner."

Judging by the tone of his voice, Meng Yao himself had been a victim of that friendly teasing, and that perhap it hadn't gone so smoothly between them. That would explain why Meng Yao seemed to prefer Jiang Cheng's company, who was less fun to have around, but also a little quieter when he wasn’t shouting at Wei Wuxian.

Personally, Nie Huaisang preferred Wei Wuxian out of the three, but was getting a little annoyed at him right at that moment.

While Jiang Cheng and Meng Yao went their way to enjoy their freedom for the rest of the day (they would waste it studying, they seemed the type), Nie Huaisang decided to accompany Wei Wuxian all the way to the library, so they could chat a little. He still had a plan to put in motion, orders from his future self to obey, and his own natural desire for fun to satisfy.

“I don’t understand why you’re like that with Lan Wangji,” Nie Huaisang said as they took the longest path possible toward the library, trying to keep his tone casual. "If you want to be his friend, there are better ways. Why don't you talk to him nicely?"

Wei Wuxian did not even hesitate. "I've tried, and he ignores me."

That was sadly true, as Nie Huaisang had seen a few times. It didn’t help that Wei Wuxian naturally sounded like he was trying to tease people, even when he was sincere. He was so fun to have around that most people didn’t mind it, but for someone like Lan Wangji...

"Well maybe if you apologised to him?" Nie Huaisang suggested.

"I've tried that too, but he thinks I'm insincere.”

"Because you are!" Nie Huaisang pointed out, fighting a smile.

Wei Wuxian just laughed, but that was an answer in itself.

"Please, at least don't make him any angrier," Nie Huaisang pleaded. "He'll never be your friend otherwise!"

Hearing him get so distressed about that, Wei Wuxian stopped in his tracks, his expression more serious than Nie Huaisang had ever seen so far. He was a little scary like that, something about his height and the shape of his eyes making him look cold and distant when he wasn’t grinning and laughing.

"Listen, Nie-xiong,” Wei Wuxian said in a voice that had lost some of its warmth. “I want to be his friend, sure. I think there's something interesting about him, definitely. I’d really like it if I could be close to Lan Zhan, and given the chance I’ll do it for sure. But if he only becomes friends with me because I start acting like someone I'm not, then we're not really friends, and it's not worth the effort."

“Wei-xiong, I didn’t expect you to be wise like that,” Nie Huaisang whispered, a little awed.

“Only you would find that wise,” Wei Wuxian mocked, and Nie Huaisang found that he could breathe a little more easily now that the other boy was laughing again. “If Jiang Cheng heard me, he’d say that my personality is too awful for anyone to like me! And Meng Yao would say something about compromises. I’m pretty sure they’re the wise ones, but I just don’t feel like acting so seriously.”

Nie Huaisang grinned, a little envious of such a bold way of living. He was not always likeable, according to a lot of people (himself included, when it came to the man he was supposed to become), and so he would never have expected people to fully like him as he was. Nobody except his brother, who had little choice in the matter, and maybe Su She who probably felt like he couldn’t be too picky when it came to friends, and… well, Lan Xichen seemed to like him as he was, too, but that was just because he was so nice.

It was so bold of Wei Wuxian to expect to be fully accepted as he was. But then again, Lan Wangji also wasn’t the sort to make efforts to get others to like him, so at least they had that in common.

As they arrived near the library, the topic had to be dropped. Wei Wuxian, with a grimace of fake agony, went inside to sit with Lan Wangji, while Nie Huaisang had the pleasant surprise of finding Su She about to leave the library, and free to spend some time with him. Lan Wangji had asked for his help to put some order in a section of the building while waiting for Wei Wuxian to arrive, and Su She couldn’t decide if he was flattered or annoyed that the request had been made to him rather than another disciple.

Su She ranted about that for a little bit as they walked away from the library, before complaining about his classes, and then about a letter from his mother who wanted him to send home some talismans because she was still convinced their house was haunted even thought he’d visited during winter and hadn’t noticed anything amiss. Nie Huaisang listened, and even reacted here and there, but couldn’t quite focus on his friend’s problem that day. Su She noticed of course, and asked what hung so heavy on his mind that he couldn’t even laugh at his description of a clearly fake haunting.

“I might have a silly question to ask you,” Nie Huaisang replied. “But please, don’t make fun of me for it. It’s kind of important, and I think you could really help me.”

“That sounds very worrying, but fine, ask me.”

"How would one seduce a Lan?"

Su She gave him such a long, serious look, that Nie Huaisang started feeling he’d rather have been laughed at after all.

"So you're finally doing something about Lan gongzi?” Su She asked. “About time, it was getting annoying how clueless you are. And, well, if you want my opinion…"

"Oh, no, this is about Lan Wangji, not Xichen-gege!"

Su She stopped walking and fell silent for a moment, his expression turning complicated. He looked as if he’d eaten a very sour lemon that also happened to be moldy, all while there was a cut in his mouth.

"Lan er-gongzi? Really?"

"Yes. See, I think Wei-xiong and him could be good friends,” Nie Huaisang quickly explained, startled by that strong reaction, “so of course I want to help. But they're the two most difficult people in the world, you know? Xichen-gege is helping, but a second opinion never hurts."

"Ah, it's just that," Su She said, instantly relaxing.

He resumed walking away from the library, and Nie Huaisang followed.

"Well, yeah. Why did you think I needed help about Xichen-gege?"

Su She hesitated, and even opened his mouth a few times to say something. Eventually he frowned and shrugged.

"If you're too stupid, it's not my problem,” he said. “Let's talk about those other two instead, since you’re so preoccupied. Aside from being equally good at fighting, what do they have in common?"

Nie Huaisang crossed his arms on his chest and shook his head.

"Nothing at all."

Su She nodded.

"Then I guess they need to fight again. Maybe in public."

"You think that'd help if they had an audience?" Nie Huaisang wondered.

"No idea,” Su She said with a wicked grin, “but I'd like to see Lan er-gongzi in a fight that makes him break a sweat."

Nie Huaisang poked him in the ribs.

"Mean. But… Wei-xiong can be pretty full of himself,” he admitted. “I guess I'd also like to see if he's as good as he thinks. How to get them to fight though?"

They’d reached a more isolated part of the Cloud Recesses, a small garden that rarely saw much use, just at the border to the wilderness. They found a bench, and after removing some dead leaves they sat there to continue chatting in peace.

"In two days, you get a day off from lectures, right?” Su She asked. “Get your Wei-xiong to the training grounds after lunch. Lan er-gongzi is always there at that time on a free day, and I'll do my best to be as well. It'll be pretty easy to get them to spar."

"Su-xiong you're just the best!” Nie Huaisang exclaimed, hugging his friend who barely even grumbled against such effusions. “What would I do without you?"

"You'd be less efficient for sure. Now can we talk about something less boring than Lan er-gongzi?”

“Yes, yes! Tell me more about your parents’ haunting, I’ll really listen now! If it’s not a ghost, then what is it?”

Pleased to return to a more fun subject, Su She started discussing his theory about some wild cats and a few squirrels that he suspected to have found their way into the currently disused ‘haunted’ room, and talked about it with such indignation that Nie Huaisang was soon in tears from how hard he laughed.

Although nobody had been warned of the duel to come, a small crowd had quickly assembled around the training grounds once it became understood that Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian were having a friendly fight. They were both reputed to be insanely skilled after all, and rumours about their first duel under the moonlight had spread fast.

So far, Nie Huaisang had to admit that both boy's reputation was deserved. If anything, they were both more talented than he would have expected. They exchanged blows and parried them as if it were easier than breathing, making for a beautiful show. Su She, who stood on Nie Huaisang's right at the very edge of the training grounds, appeared consumed with admiration and envy. He'd fallen silent a while ago, and perhaps regretted this fight he'd helped organise.

On Nie Huaisang's left, Jin Zixuan was almost as upset, just a little better at concealing it.

"I can't believe such talent has been wasted and given to the world's most obnoxious person," he complained as Wei Wuxian dodged a blow.

"Apparently, that's also Lan Wangji’s opinion," Nie Huaisang cheerfully replied. "But I think he's warming up to Wei-xiong now."

Lan Wangji, after a moment of surprise at the way Wei Wuxian had avoided his attack, lunged at him again with renewed vigour.

"Yes, I can see they're on their way to becoming best friends," Jin Zixuan sneered. "Well, that's getting boring. I was hoping to see Wei Wuxian put in his place, but now he's just going to be more insufferable. I'll see you later, Nie gongzi."

He left, but the spot next to Nie Huaisang didn't remain empty for very long. Lan Xichen quickly made his way there. Nie Huaisang immediately smiled at him, but unlike the rest of them, Lan Xichen didn't appear to pleased by the show.

"Huaisang what's going on here?" he asked. "What are they fighting about? Did something happen?"

"Oh they're just fighting for the sake of it!" Nie Huaisang cheerfully explained, only for Lan Xichen to look even more distressed.

"Wangji got into a fight without reason? How?"

Alerted by his tone, Su She tore his eyes from the fight and gave Lan Xichen a quick bow.

"Lan gongzi needs not worry. They're not actually fighting, this is only a friendly spar."

"Yes, we thought it'd be good for them, so we made it happen," Nie Huaisang confirmed. “I think it’s going great! Wei-xiong looks like he’s having the time of his life!”

Reassured that no rules were broken and no serious harm was intended by either party, Lan Xichen finally properly looked at the ongoing duel. He observed the two fighters for a moment before eventually nodding.

“Wangji too is enjoying this,” he said after some consideration. “I’m glad for him. It is so rare for him to get an opponent of his level. Other juniors are rarely a match, and adults won’t spar with him because they don’t want to lose to someone so young. You had a good idea, Huaisang.”

“Oh, that wasn’t even my idea,” Nie Huaisang replied, beaming. “It was Su-xiong who suggested it, and who asked to see them spar.”

Lan Xichen turned his attention to Su She, who appeared a little uncomfortable. Nie Huaisang realised, a little late, that scheming to make people fight, even in a friendly manner, was probably against some of Gusu Lan rules.

“I am glad you have such a good friend helping you set your plan in motion,” Lan Xichen said with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Still, don’t drag him into too much mischief. I would be very disappointed in you, Huaisang, if you caused Su-shidi to get in trouble. He’s worked so hard to prove himself to our teachers, let’s not ruin his efforts just because you like to have a little too much fun.”

“Of course not!” Nie Huaisang exclaimed. “Su-xiong, you wouldn’t let me cause you real problems, right?”

“I only agree with Nie gongzi’s ideas if they don’t contradict the rules,” Su She confirmed, bowing again toward Lan Xichen. “And I wouldn’t let Nie gongzi do anything dangerous or ill-advised. Lan gongzi can be at peace, I won’t let anything happen to his friend.”

Lan Xichen smiled stiffly.

"I know I can trust Su-shidi to take good care of Nie gongzi. I am… quite happy to leave him in your hands, where I know he'll be safe."

It was a rather odd way to say that, and there was something a little too cold in Lan Xichen’s tone which did not quite please Nie Huaisang. But Su She himself seemed unbothered, so this might just have been Nie Huaisang imagining things. It was probably just that Lan Xichen still remained doubtful regarding Lan Wangji’s potential friendship with Wei Wuxian, which had to affect his mood.

But things really were going quite well. In fact, they were going much better than Nie Huaisang had hoped. After fighting a little more, Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian eventually stopped when a Lan teacher approached them to explain that he needed the training grounds for his own class. There didn’t appear to be a clear winner between them, as far as Nie Huaisang could say. Later, when he asked Su She, his friend gave his more expert opinion that although they had completely different fighting styles, they were equals in strength and capacity. It would be interesting, he said, to see them fight side by side instead of against each other.

For now though, they politely bowed to each other, and Wei Wuxian, grinning more brightly than Nie Huaisang had ever seen him yet, asked if they might train together again in the future.

It was quite funny to see Lan Wangji’s conflicted expression. On one hand, Wei Wuxian was nearly a criminal in his eyes, who had disrespected his uncle, broken many rules, and cheated during an exam, all of which was unforgivable and marked Wei Wuxian as beneath his consideration. But at the same time, this looked to have been a very fun sparring session, Lan Wangji had been forced to use all his skill to keep up with his opponent, and that was something too precious to be easily dismissed.

At a loss, Lan Wangji turned to look at his brother, hoping for guidance. Lan Xichen, in turn, only briefly glanced at Nie Huaisang before nodding at his brother with an encouraging smile.

“Behave in class,” Lan Wangji ordered with a slight frown, before turning away.

Wei Wuxian looked disappointed by what he must have mistaken for rejection, but Nie Huaisang saw that answer for what it was and ran to his friend to explain that Lan Wangji had, in fact, very warmly agreed to fight him again.

#xisang #nie huaisang #lan xichen #double time travel #mo dao zu shi #mdzs #jau writes

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1rintooru · 3 years

Text

Little Agreements

Pairing: teacher! Sugawara Koshi x gn! reader

Themes: fluff, enemies to lovers

Word Count: 2k one-shot

Warnings: light swearing - that’s all!

Summary: You and Sugawara are rival teachers at a reputable elementary school. Even though you can hardly stand each other, your students have started shipping you together and it’s just awfully annoying! Little do they know, you’ve been keeping a secret from them the entire time.

a/n: teacher suga is good suga... this was so fun to write and purely self-indulgent - i can't get him outta my fat brain🥴 but enjoy anyways..!

You clicked your pen once. Twice. Three times. Perhaps to an outsider it would appear that you were annoyed – impatient even, but you knew it was nothing more than a habit, much like the restless tapping of your foot or improper care kept to personal belongings. You eyed the worn-down mathematics book that was currently being hastily shoved into a backpack, the spine barely keeping the pages glued together.

“Looks like you’re all set to go,” you proclaimed, putting down your pen and eyeing the student in front you. The boy beamed, yanking the zipper of his backpack shut and throwing it over his shoulder.

“Couldn’t have done it without ya, teach!”

You nodded and smiled appreciatively. You were flattered but you couldn’t take all the credit. The boy you were tutoring for a couple weeks now always claimed he didn’t care for school; you still remembered how he once told you that sports were ‘where it’s at’ – whatever that meant. However, the improved grades paired with the purple shadows under his eyes told you an entirely different story. He’d made his way to the door, his hand already grasping the handle before turning around, an impish grin plastered on his face.

“Even though you and Sugawara-sensei are cute together, we’re still gonna beat your butts!”

You bolted out of your seat and glowered at the young boy.

“Don’t you have other classes to tend to?”

He smirked at your chagrin.

“I’ll see ya around!” he shouted, sending you a quick a wave goodbye before finally leaving the room. You plopped back into your seat upon hearing the door close behind the student, rubbing your temple discontentedly.

Ah. Of course.

How could you forget the school speed quiz? It was an annual event that the school implemented three years ago as a means to motivate students and raise class scores. The idea was that a group of children would be chosen to represent their class and be quizzed on a variety of subjects – the questions becoming increasingly difficult as the game progressed. At the time you sneered at the idea and even complained to the school director that it would only waste funds and resources. Now you were glad that he didn’t listen to you, though he could have skipped laughing in your face. With that being said, the event was a double-edged sword. It made you incredibly happy and filled you with pride seeing students find the joy in learning again, but on the other hand it only exacerbated the teasing comments from the students. They adored seeing you two together and you never could quite wrap your head around it. After all, you and Sugawara were rivals.

Your eyes darted down to your wristwatch: fifteen minutes left until next period. Not a whole lot of time, but just enough to shotgun a coffee and have snack in the solace of the staffroom. You hurriedly tidied the mess on your desk, arranging everything to your liking for the next class before finally stepping out into the bustling commotion of the school hallway. Excited chitter-chatter and non-discreet gossip filled halls as you found yourself surrounded by young children. Each face was familiar and you could have assigned a name to every single one. Even the tall one with fluffy gray hair and gentle brown eyes with the recognizable birthmark.

Wait, no – that’s no child; that’s Sugawara.

He walked towards you with a pep in his step and a bright grin, parting the busy hallway like Moses as students stared at him slack-jawed and awestruck. He was the school celebrity, proven by the sheer number of students that called out to him as he passed – and he loved it. You tried to swerve around him, but it was surprisingly difficult to escape through a sea of grade schoolers.

Damn it, just when you were looking forward to that coffee!

“Here, like I promised.”

Sugawara’s voice rang clearly as he firmly pressed a stack of essays into your hands, the weight of the stack momentarily catching you off guard. Your eyes instinctively scanned the first page laying on top. As per usual, your students performed well in academic pursuits but that wasn’t what bothered you.

“Green glitter gel pen?” you teased, lifting an eyebrow questioningly.

His hazel eyes gleamed confidently. “Hey, we agreed that I would help grade assignments that you couldn’t catch up on – you never said I couldn’t use my colored pens!” He mirrored your teasing lilt before continuing. “Besides, from a psychological standpoint the color green is more uplifting and motivational than a harsh red.”

He wasn’t entirely wrong. You both had agreed that you would tutor his students in mathematics and sciences while he would help grade assignments to take some of the workload off your plate. But that didn’t make his claim any more convincing and it only made you roll your eyes disparagingly.

“That pseudo-science is why I’m the one tutoring your students.”

“Geez, point made Y/N!” he scratched his head embarrassedly, the other hand defensively creating a barrier between the two of you.

“Y/L/N,” you quickly corrected him.

Sugawara’s posture visibly deflated at the curtness of your words. As mature and gentle as he was, he had a tendency to have his heart on his sleeve. You felt a little guilty and even considered saying something to mince your words, but the opportunity was stolen from you as a group of young girls skipped past, snickering as they went.

“Oh my god, Y/L/N-sensei and Suga-senpai are flirting again!”

Your secure stance faltered as the unsuspecting comment hit you like a brick, nearly making you drop all your papers. Sugawara’s eyebrow quirked upwards, thoroughly amused by your loss of composure. You hoped that the heat you felt in your face couldn’t be seen from the outside as you gingerly smoothed out the folds of your sweater.

“Suga-senpai?”

Sugawara’s playful grin immediately dropped as he noticed the daggers you glared at him.

“Huh?! A-ah it’s not like I told them to call me that! It – it just kinda happened.”

Seeing him so flustered would normally have made you smile, but you weren’t going to give him any kind of reassurance. Besides, it would have only worked as ammunition for privy students stalking your conversation. So instead, you simply shook your head, an exasperated sigh just barely escaping from your pursed lips.

“Well, if you don’t mind, I have a coffee waiting for me – and you have recess duty, have you already forgotten? So, if you’ll excuse me.”

You gave him a patronizing poke on the shoulder as you moved past him, beelining towards the staffroom.

The two of you were so vastly different in your teaching methods. You took your work seriously and prided yourself in the academic success of your students – your class always scored extraordinarily well. You were stern but incredibly ambitious and dedicated to your craft. Sure, Sugawara was popular with the kids, but playing the role as best friend wasn’t going to help them pass their classes. You failed to understand why most of the schoolchildren were obsessed with you two being an intimate couple; even prior to the school speed quiz event the two of you were rivals. His laissez-faire teaching methods didn’t mesh well with your own – in fact, you resented them. That’s why it was akin to pouring salt into a fresh wound when each year your respective classes tied during the annual event.

You decided to ignore the thought. This year was going to be different.

****

Oh, how you loved being the one responsible for cleanup duty.

At least, that’s what you would say if it weren’t that you were the only one responsible for cleanup duty.

As you watched one of your students – a petite girl with long dark hair – collect a pile of dirt into a plastic dustpan, you began to wonder how Sugawara roped you into this. Again. You and him had a lot of agreements, for the sake of professionalism of course, but this was not one of them. The school day seemed to drudge on forever and you were not spared from any incessant comments, even in its final moments. Ironically, one of your pupils turned into somewhat of a teacher as they explained to you what ‘shipping’ and ‘OTP’ meant.

Why on earth would they consider you and Sugawara something like that?

You dismissed the remaining students after carefully examining the room. The floors were cleaned and the whiteboard was spotless, but the wastebasket hadn’t been emptied and the desk arrangement was crooked. It wasn’t exactly up to par with how you usually left the room, but you were no heathen and you noticed just how lethargic everyone was becoming.

You also needed to find a certain someone that deserved to be chewed out.

That certain someone was found in the school’s gymnasium, excitedly talking to the school volleyball team that was retiring for the night. The frustration you felt immediately melted once you saw how animated Sugawara became as you overheard his motivational tangent. His passion was infectious and easily fired up the young boys in yellow and blue jerseys listening to him.

Was this where Sugawara always disappeared off to?

It was a silly question, really. Seeing him zealously offer game strategies with the biggest grin on his face made the answer obvious. You cleared your throat, suddenly feeling awkward as all the children – and Sugawara – turned to face you. The boy you had tutored earlier today, now clad in a yellow jersey spoke first.

“Well teach, did ya know that Sugawara-sensei was a volleyball player in high school too? He was a setter, believe it or not!”

You could only stare dumbfounded as your eyes bounced back and forth between the braggadocious athlete and a proudly grinning Sugawara. The lack of response on your end began to unnerve the gray-haired man as the corners of his mouth began to twitch downwards and his eyes glossed over with doubt.

You shrugged, “I don’t really see it, honestly.”

The both of them gasped in unison. The young teen stared at you dumbstruck – his jaw would’ve hit the floor if it could, while Sugawara staggered backwards as if a spear had punctured him in the chest.

“She’s a tough cookie, Sugawara-sen–” the teen’s underhanded comment earned him a swift kick from his teacher.

“Well, I think it’s time to call it a night. How about we tidy up and retire for the evening?”

And just like that, Sugawara had roped you into another cleaning duty. Thankfully the volleyball team was still so fired up from his speech earlier that the tidying up went by remarkably fast. Eventually you and him stood alone in the building, after finally saying your goodbyes to the remaining kids.

He looked at you and cocked his head to the side, to which you nodded in response. Perhaps it was a simple unspoken agreement or maybe it was just a force of habit to head home together. Regardless, it was hard to imagine it any other way.

The cool autumn air greeted you the moment you stepped out of the gymnasium. Goosebumps pricked your skin as a crisp autumn breeze embraced you, sending a shiver down your spine. The sky had turned into a watercolor of fiery oranges and deep purples as evening drew closer. You glanced over to Sugawara, nestled in the layers of his scarf and his hands hidden in the pockets of his coat.

“Do you have regrets?”

Sugawara paused, brown and orange leaves twirled with the wind just short before his feet, but that wasn’t what stopped him. He was clearly perplexed by your question.

“Regrets?” He scrunched his nose as though the word itself repulsed him. He dug his hands deeper into the depths of his pockets and his features visibly softened as he pulled out a golden ring. It gleamed magnificently as the rays of the setting sun reflected off the band. Seeing him fit the ring snugly onto his finger prompted you to do the same, pulling out the velvet pouch that protected the ring within it. Sugawara smiled as he watched you slip the ring on, fondness etched into his features as he extended his hand towards you. You happily obliged and entangled your fingers in his.

“How could I ever have regrets with the life I have now?”

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #sugawara koshi #sugawara koushi #sugawara x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios #selfmade

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botherkupo · 3 years

Text

20 questions: writer’s edition

thanks for the tag @carpisuns

How many works do you have on AO3?

What’s your total AO3 word count?

1276156 (hjkhk i’ve written a lot)

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

11 (but i only have 5 on AO3). First one was Harry Potter, but have also written for final fantasy VII and XIII, Dragon Ball Z, Cowboy Bebop, Detective Conan/Magic Kaitou, Nanatsu no Taizai, Avatar the last airbender, legend of korra, and miraculous ladybug

What are your top five fics by kudos?

1: a lie for a lie

2: the undying fire: blood and fire

3: i’ll be your (wing)man

4: caught in the chat

5: Zuko’s tiny dilemma

gonna put the rest under the cut

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

yes! i will try to respond to every comment, as i really appreciate that someone has taken the time to share their thoughts. you have no idea how happy you make me (although, admittedly, i can take a while if i fall behind -- i have replied to some people over 200 days late hkjhjhk, but i genuinely like replying to comments and have actually made some good friends through comments/replying

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

i don’t do unhappy endings. some of them can be bittersweet, i guess, like heroes and lullabies or been here before , but the only stories that have ended on a properly angsty note are ones that are part of a series, so i don’t thikn that really counts

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

i don’t know to be honest. i have written a lot of humour and fluff

Do you write crossovers? If yes, what’s the craziest thing you’ve written?

my first fanfic was actually this awful harry potter/final fantasy crossover. i mean it was awful. i deleted it because it made me cringe so much hjkhjkhk. These days i just write the odd au stuff set in another world, like Marinette and the Moving Castle (hmc au)

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

hkjhkhjkhk yes. a lot. most of them make me laugh (especially the essay-length rants), but there have been times where i’ve been genuinely frustrated. still, for other writers who have to deal with this kind of thing, just remember that the 1 or so % who hate on your fics are just that -- a small number of people. they really aren’t worth your time

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

i have in the past - more emotional and not super graphic -- but i deleted those fics because it’s just not my thing at the end of the day and i don’t want to read or write that kind of stuff anymore

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

yep. back on good old FFN. it was rubbish as well so i don’t know why the person bothered hkjhkjhk

Have you ever had a fic translated?

quite a few. i am forever surprised and flattered that people have taken the time to translate my fics, because i know it’s not easy. never mind all those words -- it’s just super hard to get the right meaning or effect across when translating, but these people take the time to do that as a hobby. you’re all amazing and deserve way more recognition in fandoms

Have you ever co-written a fic?

i did start an atla one with @cabbage-foam but i think we’d both agree we’re never going to update that one again 😅. Otherwise, i’m working on two idiots and a hamster with @carpisuns (and it’s lots of fun)

What’s your all time favourite ship?

at the moment it’s lovesquare, but i actually really love Nalu (fairy tail). I’ve just never done anything fandom-related for them

What’s a WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

doctor tsurugi wants a day off. it’s a lukagami sherlock au and was supposed to be a fun slice of life kind of thing, but i never ended up getting past chapter 1. i just set it as complete because i don’t think i’ll ever find the energy to do anything with it. But @masilvi did this amazing art for it, which i love so, so much, and i wish i could keep working on this fic if only to do justice to the art lol

What’s your writing strengths?

hmmm, i care a lot about the flow and readability for my writing -- i want it to be as accessible as possible -- so my writing is pretty concise. i try not to waste words and (i hope you’ll agree) i have a good balance between dialogue, introspection, and description. Humour comes easily to me, and i think i’m pretty good at getting emotion across

What’s your writing weaknesses?

i could be better at my wording when it comes to description -- i feel like i use the same phrases a lot and i wish i could be more creative hkjhkjhk. romance is also difficult for me, mostly because i’m aroace and will just straight up cringe and ahte what i’m writing lol. But also i just don’t really understand physical attraction, so all of my leads probably end up feeling ace-coded, even if i don’t mean them to be 😂

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in fic?

i don’t do it because, if the setting is based in a language that isn’t my native language or the one i’m writing in, it’s already suggested they’re speaking in that other language anyway. Plus, not everyone will know those words or phrases, etc, so it’s kind of unfair and distracting in a way. This is actually happened to me as a reader. the author had a wee translator note at the end of the chapter, but i still spent that whole chapter just being like wtf does that mean

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

harry potter. i still laugh when i think about how i stumbled across fanfiction, not knowing what it was, and being so confused why the “leaked” sections were written in hermione’s point of view

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

ahhhh i don’t know. i have a huge soft spot for zuko’s tiny dilemma and more than (yes, the rednana month fic hkjhkjhk), but i’m terrible at choosing favourites. each of them are special to me in their own way

phew that was a lot

Tagging (and no pressue) @thewritewolf @zimtlein @emsylcatac @emletish-fish @cabbage-foam @maketea @trashcatontherooftop

#writer stuff #tag game

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macandstella · 2 years

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CSI NY, of course!!

sorry for the delay @frostysfrenzy mobile was being super wonky about formatting. though, i suppose, when is tumblr ever not wonky?

my favorite female character:

you already know the answer to this and if you didn't, reading my url would give a big clue lol. it's stella bonasera. i could (and perhaps someday might) write an essay about why i love her but the thesis would be that she has gone through so much, experienced such heartbreak and trauma, and she chooses to be kind.

and what makes that even more spectacular are the times in which she easily loses her temper, where she snaps at people - suspects and friends alike. she doesn't trust easily, and lets so very few people in.

so kindness and warmth are something she chooses. it isn't a default for her - she tries to act that way. and there is something beautiful in a character that grew up so alone, that has had a series of the worst life has to offer thrown at her, who could easily allow herself the prickliness she clearly has inside her deliberately choosing to be kind instead.

my favorite male character:

sheldon hawkes. we don't get to know as much about him as some of the more main cast, but what we do get, i really love. sid hammerback is a close second here, but what puts sheldon over the top is two things

1) i love that he's a walking encyclopedia. its fun and he owns his nerdery happily, he's not self-conscious about how smart he is at all.

2) significantly more important, i love that we see why he left the ER. he lost one patient too many and so decided to do good where he would do himself less harm. he couldn't bear not being able to help people, save them. and then he applied to be in the field because he wanted to see these people before they ended up on his table, investigate what had happened to them, how they got there. its about compassion, a real love and genuine care for each person he sees. he wants to help.

my favorite book/season/etc:

season 2 or 5, probably. i would argue that maybe season 3 had better episodes, but the season itself was much flatter and also had some pretty bad episodes too. season 4 was done dirty by the writers strike and it showed in rushed plotlines toward the end and curveballs that came from nowhere and never got touched on again.

my favorite episode (if its a tv show):

oooooooooof this is really tough but my favorite might be 'commuted sentences' where two women decide to kill men guilty of sex crimes in a plot a la strangers on a train

its a great exploration of what justice means, what it means for justice to fail, and the people the system leaves behind - the men who got away with what they did were wealthy, powerful, white, and the women were left knowing the system isn't there to protect them.

the contrast, too, between mac's reaction and stella's also made the episode great. mac - whose righteousness is a defining characteristic - strongly disapproved of what those women did. considered it a plot to subvert the justice system because they didn't get the result they wanted.

but at the end of the episode, the woman who'd been raped by the man this woman killed sees her and they share smiles, like she's grateful, like they understand each other. and stella watches, and she seems like she gets it, too.

my favorite cast member:

melina. every interview she's in, she's so funny and its infectious. the BTS tidbit about how once it got super late at night, she would sing show tunes and have gary try to guess what musical they were from? that if she got even more tired, she'd start singing her lines as long as the cameras weren't rolling? i found a fiber, here it is sometimes still gets stuck in my head unprompted. the episodes where she had writing credit were good and well thoughtout. very much about greece and stella's greek identity, but that's to be expected.

my favorite ship:

again i refer you to my url asdfghjkl

i do love mac and stella. they were a very formative ship for me.

on paper, they don't have much in common. mac is the 'straightman' (military background, emphasis on the science and remaining unattached to cases, griefstricken) to stella's 'renegade' (quick temper, penchant for bending - if not outright breaking - the rules, follows instinct as much as evidence).

but they care so deeply about each other. they are best friends and they see each other through their worst times.

"still not sleeping?" "reminds me of the old mac taylor" "i can honestly say i wouldn't do this job without you" "you're happy!" "thats what partners do, we take care of each other" "how are you holding up?" "you and i are a lot alike"

there's a real bedrock of trust and friendship there. they are each other's person, letting them see parts of them they don't share with other people. you believe that they are old friends from the very first time that you see them on screen, and they never lose that sense of familiarity and intimacy.

a character I’d die defending:

for the sake of not choosing stella again (though i would), i'll choose danny.

i really like that the writers made him a character who is flawed but trying. they give him the same tests so we can see how he handles them differently the next time, how he learns, how he grows. he messes up, of course, but we get to watch him realize he made a mistake and either fix it or avoid it in a similar situation again.

a character I just can’t sympathize with:

i hate to keep slamming adam in these kinds of posts because it makes it seem like i really hate his character, which i dont! there are lots of things i do like about adam, even if i do think he's kind of grating overall.

csi:ny very rarely went for sympathetic suspects (not an uncommon choice in crime shows of this era, but fewer than the OG and other Bruckheimer series) and the ones that they did really hit their mark. i never felt like i was supposed to sympathize with a person and just didnt. csi:ny did well with character-based content in that way.

a character I grew to love:

peyton. it took me a couple of rewatches to appreciate her character outside her relationship with mac, and in that way i think she was done dirty by having her introduction scene be in bed with him, the first tension her character faces in the show be about him acting skittish after seeing her at a crime scene despite the fact that he knows they work together.

the issue is we are dropped in the middle of that relationship, so i'm not compelled by that tension. what do i care if mac is still hesitant about this? i just learned that this character and relationship exists a couple minutes ago, i'm not invested yet.

but outside that relationship is actually where her character shines. she's witty and playful and fun, as well as smart and principled and dedicated! i wish we got to see more of who she is outside of her relationship, because as a character she had so much potential to be great. of course, she does remind me strongly of jane - the DNA analyst from season 1 - but while similar, she's her own character and could have been brilliant if she and her relationships had been allowed to develop more organically.

my anti otp:

i dont have one???? which is odd because i can be a contrarian bitch about this stuff sometimes, but the canon relationships range from excellent to decent, and im not put off by anything really

#frostysfrenzy #answered #csi:ny #ask box

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yukipri · 3 years

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I wasn't sure if someone had asked before so I think I spent an hour searching through your blog cuz I didn't want to be obnoxious by asking a question you've answered before, I couldn't find anything, and I'm so sorry if you HAVE answered this before cuz I'm not trying to be obnoxious I'm so sorry. But my questions: Do you mainly ship ASL as a trio, or are you also cool with SabAce as a duo ship? Do you have and lesbian ships you like? Who's your favorite emperor [aside from Luffy cuz, I mean, duh]. What do you think Ace and Sabo's bounty's would be post timeskip where Ace DOESN'T, you know, die? And what are your thoughts on Dragon as a character as well as his relationship with Sabo and Luffy? [Mostly I was trying to think of interesting questions that might entertain you. I love you and your work and appreciate how open and genuinely nice you seem btw!]

Thanks so much for going through my blog! Honestly I don’t mind answering questions again, and if I remember that I’ve answered it recently, I’ll just redirect you to that answer! So it’s no biggie, don’t let that stress you out! (same goes to anyone else who may be concerned about the same thing!)

That being said, I do ask that questions that you might want more detailed answers for be sent in separate asks, as it makes it easier for me to link to the headcanons masterpost if I end up writing an essay, and makes it easier for me to find time to answer bits of questions I DO have answers for, while giving me time to take time answering others. I don’t at all mind a spam of like, a dozen separate asks! I won’t consider it spam at all, and will be flattered that you want to talk to me ^ ^ (in fact, I just updated my askbox thing to make this a lil more clear! It’s not a big deal, just you’re defs not the only person who’s done multiple questions per ask, and it’s just a bit more convenient for me ^ ^;)

That being said, all these are pretty short so I’ll try to give short answers to these too to keep them to this one post ^ ^;

Do you mainly ship ASL as a trio, or are you also cool with SabAce as a duo ship?

Romantically, I ship Ace and Sabo exclusively with Luffy. That being said, I ship Sabo and Ace platonically with each other just as hard as I ship them with Lu. I really feel they’re a well balanced trio who love each other equally. In fact, I’d say my preferred take of Ace + Sabo really pushes that platonic line, more Queer Platonic if anything. Patreon peeps have already seen what I mean by this, but non-Patreon peeps will begin to see that interaction more starting On the Courtship Part 9!

Do you have and lesbian ships you like?

I have several low-key ones, like I think Vivi x Nami’s cute, Shirahoshi x Mansherry etc. But the ones I’d say I actually ship are All the Gals x fem!Lu LOL (since Mermaid AU does contain Nami x Lu, Koala x Lu, and Vivi x Lu among its ships ^ ^; Idk, I don’t really ship them when Lu’s a guy bc most of these gals give me Gay Vibes, but when Lu’s a girl I DO ship them???)

Who's your favorite emperor [aside from Luffy cuz, I mean, duh].

Shanks and Whitebeard, surprise surprise LOL

What do you think Ace and Sabo's bounty's would be post timeskip where Ace DOESN'T, you know, die?

Depends on the specific circumstances that lead to Ace not dying, and exactly what he’s doing during and post timeskip (like in Mermaid AU, the government thinks that Ace is dead, and he’s sorta trying to keep his head down, so his bounty won’t have gone up, etc).

And what are your thoughts on Dragon as a character as well as his relationship with Sabo and Luffy?

Mixed feelings. I think he’s got the right things in mind at heart, and I’m glad someone’s trying to solve the root of the world’s problems by going directly for the World Government and Celestial Dragons. I think he clearly did a pretty great job raising Sabo, and has likely earned the respect of his followers.

I ALSO think he’s a fantastically SHITTY dad, for having Lu and then dumping him on GARP to raise, all the while doing things that he knows would put Luffy in the same situation as Ace, hated and hunted by the government for his heritage alone, which Luffy doesn’t even know about. Like, Roger at least has the excuse of being dead, but Dragon could have and should have done so much more for Lu. It’s lucky for him that he ended up with a kid who’s like the opposite of caring about daddy issues, but Lu could have very much turned into a 2nd Ace in terms of self-loathing if his personality was different. This’ll also be mentioned in Mermaid AU.

Hope those answer your questions! (and, also helps u see why it’s easier for me to get separate questions in separate asks ^ ^;)

Thank you so much for coming to talk to me!!

❀ ❀ Send YukiPri an Ask! ❀ ❀

#YukiPri replies #One Piece #Anonymous

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undeific · 4 years

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i promise it’s not that deep, or why you’re wrong about self-inserts: an essay by your friendly neighborhood chaotic neutral

So, self-inserts. A hot topic, apparently. In 2020. Perhaps it’s due to a dashboard full of young, possibly underage writers (which is not a bad thing! embrace your creativity!), but this is a discussion I believed we had matured past. Since it has been floating around, though, here is my take, and the take a great deal of circles have embraced in the past 6-7 years or so.

There’s always been a self-insert problem in the community — not necessarily self-inserts themselves, but rather the response to them. It’s no secret that these characters are commonly regarded with disdain and always have been: they’re viewed as the most self-indulgent form of character, the least creative, and the worst-written, having been made solely for the purpose of connecting with canons and living out one’s own Mary Sue-adjacent fantasies. To some extent, these generalizations make sense and line up with a reality we are all very familiar with; after all, these assumptions must come from somewhere, and there would be few canon-portraying writers among us who could say they’ve absolutely never been met with an uncomfortable situation brought on by an overeager self-insert. In 2013, the worst crime a roleplayer could possibly commit was create a character like this, and would result in what was considered, and many times was, a well-deserved blacklisting from entire fan spaces and writing circles. A self-insert was, after all, created with no integrity and only had bad intentions.

We all know the self-insert girl — and yes, she is a girl, of course. Her dialogue is clichéd, her plots are threadbare and consist primarily of smut and romance, her backstory is tragic and attention-seeking. She often has the same name as her creator and her faceclaim is self-flattering. She seeks out canons and attractive original characters of the male persuasion, persistent in her attempts to reach out, hoping to begin shipping with her victim — or victims — of choice. She is a being purely of self-gratification and wish-fulfillment. She is, in a word, embarrassing. We do not like her. She is told on the rule pages she does not read that she will be blocked, banned, and ultimately mocked by those who have seen her floating about. She is “politely” insulted and threatened for crimes she has yet to commit, and chased from the platform as quickly, cruelly, and efficiently as possible. Yet she always comes back in one form or another, like a cockroach.

These characters still exist, of course. They were never a myth. I am familiar with them, as are you, and everyone else who has dipped their toes into the writing pool. But they are an exaggerated breed these days, and often used to perpetuate elitism in spaces where it is entirely unnecessary. The shadow of the stereotypical self-insert’s reputation has been cast over original characters as a whole, specifically female characters, and has created an unwelcoming environment prone to cliques and harassment. A character outside an established canon is suspect. A woman outside an established canon — and sometimes even within — is eyed suspiciously, hypercritically, before being thrown a generous bone by a “lower-tier” roleplayer who will determine whether or not she’s worthy of attention.

If any desire for wish-fulfillment is detected or perceived, she’s dropped quickly, often with no warning.

There is a strange idea that permeates throughout roleplaying culture that wish-fulfillment writing is done in bad faith. This is flawed logic in many ways. Roleplaying is not a job. It is not an inaccessible artform. If you engage in this form of entertainment, you are getting something out of it. You are stepping outside of yourself and becoming someone else, and you are enjoying it; you are, in other words, engaging in a form of wish-fulfillment, though perhaps not with the sticky connotations you are familiar with when contemplating the term. This very idea goes against the rhetoric that has been built up by the community, however — self-indulgence is taboo, roleplay is serious business, and only those worthy and “quality” shall partake and be given attention. (It has even been taken to the rather sad extent that if one does not keep up with aesthetic-based trends, they are met with passive disinterest if not outright disdain. But that is another essay entirely.) If you seek wish-fulfillment, you are not welcome. If you are a self-insert, you are not welcome. If your character shares too many traits with yourself, you are obviously seeking wish-fulfillment, and probably a self-insert to boot, so you are not welcome.

There are layers to this. People do not want to associate with these leper characters, and so they create strict rules to be adhered to — and that makes sense, as everyone is entitled to their own pleasurable experience, and their own guidelines. But these rules become meaningless in the shuffle, placed on carefully-crafted Google Documents to do nothing other than promote elitism and limit creativity, whether that is the intention or not. If you like a character, but find out it shares the same name and birthday with its creator despite little else in common, what do you do? If this character does not seem interested in pushing a ship onto you in your interactions, are they still breaking your rules? If a character was created with its writer as the base, though they do not behave in the stereotypical way that makes self-inserts unbearable, why is it so important? What do the origins of a character have to do with its current iteration? Why, if it does not have a negative impact on interactions, does it matter if a character is a self-insert or not? At the risk of sounding like a dusty academic, the bard once wrote, “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” What, aside from preconceived ideas, does a character’s self-insert status have to do with anything?

“Discomfort” is the word primarily used when discussing these characters negatively, and many hoops are jumped through to justify why this discomfort is felt if there is no concrete reason, no offense committed. If one is willing to dissect another’s character, but not one’s own reasons for their own discomfort when confronted with the simple, low-impact reality that this character exists, some self-reflection is warranted. Even more so if this character is, as far as you have seen, well-written, fleshed out, and interesting, with the only “downside” being that it is, in fact, a self-insert.

To write well, one must understand the character they are working with. Divorcing oneself entirely from the characters they write will only work to their detriment. All creations, all characters, must contain a piece of the writer within them to some degree; that is the only way a piece of fiction will function — but if that is against the rules, we cannot write. We cannot engage in any sort of believable storytelling. Self-inserts are, at their core, only the most exaggerated form of original character.

This, of course, is capable of leading to problems; one of the greatest issues here is the possibility of the lines between fantasy and reality getting blurred. This has happened to me when dealing with self-inserts, as well as other original characters and even canons. It is distressingly common, one of the most unpleasant situations to arise in roleplay spaces. However, if it is your assumption that the lines of fantasy and reality will be blurred purely because a character has self-insert origins, that likely says much more about your own grasp on reality rather than the self-insert’s. It is and always has been important that proper distinctions and boundaries are maintained, no matter who the writer or character are. During heavy or dark threads, writers will often be found shooting jokes back and forth in the tags to put each other at ease, and people give out their handles on instant messaging platforms to ensure easier, more efficient communication out of character. If this is done efficiently, any issues that arise are handled in a stable, mature way, and the problems that lend themselves to roleplaying become ever rarer.

Self-inserts are like any other character, they just have a label with nasty connotations and an unfortunate history and stereotype attached. There should be no thorny questions here, only whether or not the character interests you personally. If the very term is a dealbreaker for you, you are taking yourself, and this, too seriously — and missing out on some fascinating storytelling in the process.

That being said, the character I portray owns a knife and I own a knife, so I am practically a self-insert myself. I guess I’m gonna be blocked!

#in honor of izaya's birthday i'm going to be controversial #disclaimer: i have no personal stake in this matter; i have not had a self-insert character since i was twelve;#i just hate roleplay culture as a whole.#i have a lot more thoughts on this but the essay had gotten long enough;#if anyone wants to engage in friendly and mature debate #or ask questions #i am open to it! because i am nice and stable and an adult.#this is just a polite and academically-leaning reminder that maybe we don't have to be so hostile.#forgive the sarcasm at the end lmao!#anyway back to writing in character.#✚ OUT OF INFORMATION.

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surflove808 · 7 years

Text

All things “queerbait”, “so gay”, cranky shippers, etc ad infinitum. Here’s my long-ass essay on why I think it’s destructive to this show and fandom mentality in general. Part 1 :D

This is going to be sooo long. Because I am sooo fed up with the bullshit I keep seeing on here. So, I am going to break this into 2 parts. Part 1 deals with the show and its FICTIONAL characters. Part 2 will deal with the actual actors involved in making this show. I'm pissed because what could have just been supposition and discussion among fans took a wrong turn somewhere, and turned into a forum for bullying and scandalizing the actors/show. And seeing that even when they try to have a sense of humor about it, or be ingratiating to the fans about it, it always backfires on them....and ultimately, something that should be harmless (a ship) has become a toxic force of nature.

I'm going to give my 2 cents on the most annoyingly common misconceptions that I've seen being used as more can(n)on fodder because if I post and get this reblogged enough, maybe, just maybe... more people can be exposed to a more balanced interpretation.

My problem is not with the possibility of Dean being gay/bi. My problem is not with Dean and Cas possibly exploring a romantic relationship. Not at all. My problem is with the dedicated and rabid group of people that have gone over the top with their harassment on public forums regarding these characters sexuality, and linking it to the real, live human beings that portray them. Both crossing and blurring lines in a very destructive way, on Tumblr, Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, you name it... This show has so many incredible themes and messages regarding friendship, love, loyalty, trust, perseverance and family and THAT'S your takeaway? An unhealthy obsession with Dean's sexual preference??

Dean, by virtue of his looks, charisma and personality, has chemistry with almost EVERYONE. Have you noticed?? The character of Dean is written and portrayed as a naturally charismatic, flirtatious and sensual person. He wholeheartedly dives into anything that he enjoys. Eating, hunting, fucking, drinking. He doesn't seem to really appreciate boundaries or restrictions. So, what's stopping him from exploring his sexuality with men?

As far as I can see, the character of Dean as originally conceptualized and executed brilliantly by his frigging creator, Eric Kripke, was then, as you see him now, many things. But also hetero. He's also accepting, scarred, goofy, resilient, co-dependent, loving, protective, the list goes on and on.

But what he is NOT and has NEVER been written as, is gay or bi. And if you have a problem with that, that’s not a flaw in the program you’re watching. That’s your problem. If he undergoes character development that radically redefines not only how he sees himself, but how the viewer sees him, after 12 years? That's a delicate task that I don't envy the writers having to undertake, considering, the only reason they would do that so late in the game, is because they caved to pressure from the "fandom". And I use quotation marks there because, if you want an iconic character to represent your views? Write them yourself. Create them. But don't try to bully your way into another persons creation. Here's the kicker. Out of 264 episodes that have aired so far, and countless canon instances of Dean being hetero.... here are the handful of examples that certain people have latched onto as gospel:

1. Dean and the Siren, season 4, episode 14, Sex and Violence: I can't tell you how many times I've seen some Jr. detective go "A-HA! Deans siren was a MAN! Therefore, he is GAY!" If you use just a smidge of deductive reasoning and pay attention to the season leading up to this episode, and the description of a siren that was helpfully included in the episode, you could easily and reasonably deduce that because a siren's powers of seduction come from the ability to be ANYTHING to ANYONE and be that persons greatest desire.... that it makes sense for the siren to take the form of a cool, non-judgemental, trustworthy younger brother-type who has the same taste in and love for music that Dean has. Someone he can relate to. A peer.

What do you get the man who can have almost any woman that he wants?

Not a stripper, folks.

And what does Dean really want? At this point, he wants a brother who trusts his experience and instincts. A brother that he can trust. A brother who doesn't feel like a complete stranger. A friend, for fucks sake. It's not implied. It's not a theory. It's literally written and discussed IN THE EPISODE, people. Move on.

2. Dean and Gunnar Lawless, season 11, episode 15, Beyond the Mat: If you know any guys who are into sports or bands, and have never seen them go batshit fanboy over one of their sports or music heroes...then you just haven't spent enough time with them on their turf.

3. Deans "gay thing", season 8, episode 13, Everybody Hates Hitler: If you've never been hit on when you weren't expecting it, especially by someone you weren't expecting it from, I could see why you couldn't comprehend his behavior. If you HAVE, you were probably flustered by it. Probably didn't react as smoothly as you thought you would, amiright? I know I haven’t.

It seemed he was flattered, but didn't know what to do with himself. If he were bi/gay, and attracted to the possibility of a no-strings hookup with a willing and anonymous stranger... a blow-and-go in the mens room, for example... I think Dean could/would have easily pursued it, based on his hit rate thus far. The one area in which he has 100% confidence and zero shame, is sexual conquests. Sam wasn't around. There was nothing holding him back. So, aside from being uncertain of how to extricate himself from an awkward situation, and being flustered, I got nothin’.

4. Dean and Dr. Sexy, season 5, episode 8, Changing Channels: Not much to say here. Dean clearly had a man crush on Dr. Sexy. Would he have boned him if given the chance? Maybe. Maybe not. Ask a guy friend who idolizes Aaron Rogers or Eddie Vedder (for example) if he'd let them stick it in his pooper based on principle alone. Chances are, that guy friend would probably say "Hall pass!" If the situation actually presented itself though? He might just gush over the guy and call it a day. Who knows? WE don't.

5. Dean and Crowley: Again, ask a guy friend if he would share a room and triplets with a buddy if there were no consequences (girlfriend, things getting "weird, etc), and see what he says. The answer may surprise you. Maybe I just know a lot of uninhibited, sexy bastards!

6. Dean and Benny: Brothers in arms who go through intense combat together can and more often than not, DO form close bonds. There was nothing in this friendship that even intimated at these two having any sexual or romantic designs on each other, yet.... people still try to make it work. Bless their hearts.

7. The Big One: Dean and Cas: Dean has had countless opportunities over the years to make a move. And I DO believe he loves Cas, very much. Cas clearly loves and admires Dean. They have been through some serious shit together since day one, that neither Sam nor anyone else can compete with. But some very good advice I heard once, applies here (and this is why the 10-year crush turning into romance in rom-coms is such bullshit): If someone likes you - you WILL know. They will make a move. Or you will. And neither of you will take 10 + years to do it if there are no barriers (significant other). And if a move is made and not reciprocated? It's not because they or you is holding something back. That's just a lie we tell ourselves. SOMEONE is just not interested.

Though I love their dynamic, I'm not a Destiel shipper, but I'm willing to go either way with this one. I will say, I don't by any stretch of the imagination think the writers, actors or directors are 'queerbaiting", though. That's like accusing a crush of leading you on when it was really in your head the whole time. Their chemistry is incredible. But from what I've seen with my eyes, in the actual episodes, his relationship with Cas does not say unrequited love, sexual attraction or romance. However, if I went by the slowed-down, out-of-context gifs that are prevalent on Tumblr, I could see where people get the idea. And because these are two men who love, admire and respect each other and sometimes bicker like an old married couple, I suppose that makes them different than us and our best friends, somehow? This makes me sad, because this is a unique show, in that it deeply explores mens relationships with one another (because they're human beings too), and they just can't do that without a group of immature people giggling behind their backs in the hallways because intimacy is so intimidating that it must be mitigated by making fun of it or spreading nonsensical theories about it. Right?

Small wonder that heteronormative men, as a general rule, have so much social conditioning and shame to wade through when it comes to expressing love and care for their same-sex friends and family. (Yes, men have problems too. Not as many as us, by a long shot. But this is one of them)

You see, menfolk are expected to behave in a manfolk way, and if their behavior isn’t within the traditional and narrowly defined parameters as “hetero male”, they face the perceived stigma that accompanies “coming out”, which involves the very real fears of supposition, persecution, politicizing, backlash, gossip, undermining. etc.

This show has taken many chances. And they’re not afraid to write for and represent LGBTQ characters. But Chuck forbid that emotionally resonant, well-written, vulnerable and emotional male characters exist AND allow them to be straight. Unthinkable! And that snarky, gossipy, “tee-hee” mentality is just what enforces rigid gender roles on men and women in the 1st place. Every post I see that giggles about Cas and Dean being gay for each other because....gifs...just throws us back 50 years. Your words do have meaning, people.

If you want to know what you can do to pave the way for LGBTQ representation in entertainment and the world at large? Take the small step of acknowledging that same sex characters can feel the same range of emotions that you do for your same sex friends. Can have sustained eye contact. Can love one another, and can tenderly care for one another without you sexualizing it, fantasizing about it and policing it. I’m asking you to think about this, because this way of thinking affects everyone. Gay, straight, etc.

Season 1 Sam and Dean: Hetero. Sam in an LTR at beginning, Dean with potential to re-enter his relationship with Cassie.

This show was marketed towards males in the 18-24 demographic, but curiously, more women are interested in these boys and their story. Because they’re allowed to care without judgement. Ahem.

*As seasons go by...* Clearly, judging by the polls and hate mail...neither brother can ever have or sustain a romantic relationship with a woman. EVER again!* And it as been widely acknowledged by the cast and producers that the fans don’t want to see the Winchesters spend too much time with what they deem as a threatening female.

Why do you think Castiel was even allowed to make it this far? Sure, he’s an amazing character. But if it were Anna who dragged Dean from Hell and ultimately stuck around? Yeah, no. That was never gonna happen.

Basically, these fuckers can’t win. If they’re hetero and stay hetero, that’s a bad thing. If their characters do a 180 to please the most vocal (unfortunately) fans - then they’re caving in to pressure.

Either way, I think it's safe to say, us fans are ultimately invested (I hope) in these characters achieving happiness, wherever they find it. And personally, I'll be happy either way. But seeing this hyperbolic, over the top bullshit online that this crew are queerbaiting, etc...and that "If Destiel isn't made canon, I'm gonna do X,Y,Z..." is disgusting to me.

The musings, wishful thinking and conspiracy theories are one thing. And that's perfectly fine. I’ve got nothin but love for fanficiton writers! But drawing parallels and conclusions from some of the flimsiest crumbs available, and using that limited intel to cajole, threaten, bash and attempt to shame the actors, the crew, and the producers who work their asses off to bring us this amazing show, is pretty fucking shitty in my opinion.

These aren't public servants, guys. We're not paying them to make this show. If you want to know how a show on the CW gets funded and made - google it. If you want to know how much of a time crunch/pressure cooker situation the writers are working in, not to mention the entire team in order to produce 23 episodes per season....again, google it. And then tell me how they're able to not only craft compelling episodes and cram so much storyline, exposition, dialogue, character development, arc support, scheduling, casting, art direction, stunt coordination, set design, etc ad infinitum into each and every week, and STILL have time to drop easter eggs, and "queerbait"....

Just. To. Fuck. With. You. And undermine LGBTQ efforts at representation? They are very kind and loyal to their fans. And we DON'T OWN THEM. If you don't like what you're seeing, don't watch. But for fucks sake - do the fandom and yourselves a favor and direct your crusade towards ACTUAL threats to LBGTQ freedoms and rights.

Here's a list of places to lend support (to name a few): Family Equality Council Human Rights Campaign GLAD PFLAG Transgender Law Center Your local congressman, FFS

Rant over. If you made it this far, thank you. I owe you a fruit basket! And feel free to engage, put me on blast if you want. Let's have a discussion. But if you agree with me at all, please reblog this.... just to give some folks another point of view.

Blanket statement for those who are offended and have already called me an “asshole”, etc on their own tags:

1. This is NOT by any stretch of the imagination an anti-shipper or anti-Destiel post. I clearly stated that I don't have a problem with either. And if it happened organically in the show, as opposed to under pressure? More power to them. And I do adore Castiel.

2. This is NOT an anti-LGBTQ post. Again, clearly stated throughout the post.

3. This is NOT and never was anti-headcanon post. We all have headcanons to some degree. And If anyone wants to step up and tell me not to support an organization that's doing good work, just because I sunk their battleship... they can suck it. I also belong to some of these organizations, and I'm pretty sure they're not as invested in your headcanon as you are. And thejabberwock, I still admire your insights and posts, but am bummed that you missed the damn point of mine entirely. Per your request, I have removed your association from the original post.

4. This IS an anti-harassment post, directed at individuals who have taken this ship so far, that they've tainted the word and the concept for almost everyone else with their shitty, pushy behavior. If this describes you? I'm happy to have offended you.

5. This IS an anti-ignorance post, directed at individuals who are presented with facts and reliable data from the writers, the actors and the episodes themselves, yet refuse to acknowledge anything out of their own headcanon. Who insist on "knowing the truth" and using that arrogance to try to *Out* the characters, *Out* the actors and use threats and insults towards anyone who disagrees. If you thought I was talking to you directly, after reading that? I probably was.

6. This IS an anti-misinformation campaign post aimed at clearing up some common misconceptions.

Lastly, reading comprehension is really crucial here. I know it was a lot to read, I apologize for that. But if you're skimming through and picking and choosing something to be offended over, and continuing to feel personally persecuted regardless of whether or not that's the reality... rather than reading and understanding the entire message? Well, there's nothing more I can say or do.

#destiel #dean winchester #Sam Winchester #castiel #crowley #supernatural #spnfamily #spnfandom #Jensen Ackles #Misha Collins #fedthefuckup #queerbaiting #fuckingwafflehouseidontcare #wafflehouse?#cockles #imcomingforyounext

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textsfromumbridge · 6 years

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I think you know which fic scene I want you to do dvd commentary for.......... 🦉

I could make a joke, but I’ll just get on to the scene ;)

So, all the men and women merely players, chapter two, final scene: DANCING. Or, as I like to call it: working up a load of sexual tension

I might use some comments from the epic review essays we’ve been exchanging to expand on some insights.

...

It took her more than a few minutes to realize that they were the only ones left who were still rehearsing. Everyone else appeared to have left - even Mr. Whitefeather and Coach Wilson appeared to have departed (hopefully together).

She kinda shipped it.

You either ship Darryl and WhiJo or you’re wrong. But also, Darryl is absolutely that teacher who is just conveniently elsewhere or focused on something else when the plot calls for it. It’s just like how he runs the firm on the show. He can throw himself into things wholeheartedly and it’s such an adorable quality - and so convenient to write the two leads into interesting moments.

“Okay, once more with feeling,” Nathaniel was breathing heavy.

So of course it was not helping that he’d stripped off a few layers, leaving him in a thin tank top that left those Arms bare. He had good arms. Those were good arms to have.

Not only am I going for Buffy reference bingo, I’m going for the hormones right away. Because SMF’s everything is personally offensive to my sanity.

She just really wanted to be Josh Chan’s official girlfriend before she even attempted to kiss Nathaniel.

As you so astutely pointed out in your essay/review, Rebecca knows that kissing Nathaniel will be a game changer. If she’s Josh’s girlfriend when it happens, that might decrease the effect it will have on her. Getting together with Josh will magically cure everything that is wrong with her, and her conscious mind is definitely lumping this awkward crush on Nathaniel in with those wrong things. Unconsciously, she knows that this crush isn’t just hormones and Nathaniel is making her feel things Josh doesn’t and she is terrified of that. Josh is idealized and safe, Nathaniel is anything but.

“Just dance with me already,” she huffed, stepping closer to him.

For once, Nathaniel was quiet, almost too quiet. He just bowed formally, asking her to dance as the start of their detailed choreography.

Funny, he almost looked princely as he leaned over her hand, kissing it gently rather than faking it for the stage. Glitter exploded inside of her, mostly in her stomach, as she felt herself flush.

That feeling when your crush is completely focused on you? Yeah, glitter all over the place. And I really wanted to show the contrast between the hormonal thing going on between Nathaniel and Rebecca, and this courtly romance between the characters they are playing.

Rebecca wants this fairytale romance, but she’s also aware that real life isn’t like the storybook and real life romance can be painful and intimate and terrifying. Someone actually getting to know the real her and not the version of her she lets people see. So this moment is her ideal version of romance, a prince kissing her hand as the start to a happily ever after - with that current of hormones and reality underneath the surface.

Every time they did these the steps were more fluid, and it became easier and easier to let the glitter win. He was charming, and tall (very tall), and he danced like a dream. And when he looked at her, eyes darker than she remembered them being, she simply had to press herself a little bit closer to him.

They’d worry about fitting her supposedly big dress in between them when they had to - not yet though. Not right now.

“He was tall, very tall / and his eyes were clear and blue” - that’s from actual Cinderella, and it has SMF/Nathaniel written all over it.

It makes sense for Rebecca to be drawn in by those eyes, by the way they’ve fallen into step with each other. Dancing is all about moving together, about finding your rhythm, and that’s just such a great metaphor for their relationship. Their entire relationship so far has been a dance, starting with stepping on (metaphorical) toes, and moving more and more in sync on stage, but still lost in the push and pull off stage.

With a final twirl, she let herself lean back in his strong grip, now trusting him completely - at least in this. He would never let her fall, not on stage. Not just because it would make him look like a bad partner, but also because maybe, just maybe, he’d actually grown a little fond of her.

It was kind of pathetic, while at the same time being oddly flattering.

Rebecca has trouble trusting people, but she trusts him with this. She can read him, see that he likes her even when he hardly knows it (or doesn’t admit it) himself. She pretty much thinks he’s an idiot for liking her, because she doesn’t even like herself. She’s unlovable, so anyone who cares for her is an idiot - and because everyone’s left, no one’s ever dared to prove her wrong. She’s certainly not expecting that Nathaniel “hit it and quit it” Plimpton might actually stick around. Dismissing it is safer for everyone involved.

How long had she been leaning like this? Mere seconds? Forever? She didn’t know and didn’t much care.

I wrote this at work and there was much internal flailing. Yes I flail over stuff I write, because in this scene the characters did everything and I was just documenting it.

“I’ll walk with you,” Nathaniel waited for her to finish packing.

It would be rude not to let him. That was why she nodded, that was why she let him. It had nothing to do with her actually wanting to spend a few extra minutes with him. She’d been spending more than enough time with him for Paula to start taking notice - her best friend had not been happy with the perceived disinterest in the Chan Plan.

“Are you actually being nice now?” she was very aware of how flirtatious that particular statement came out.

“Dream on, Bunch,” he grinned as he held the door for her. “I would never.”

They want to spend time together, but they can’t let themselves admit it. They’ve got reputations to protect, perceived soulmates to seduce... This shouldn’t be happening, but it is. And we just don’t get to see them both lighthearted, but they can still bring that out in each other.

They’ve both got some parental issues and a lot of pressure to deal with both from external and internal factors... For a little while they just got to enjoy themselves, act like carefree teenagers.

I wrote this before they got to be soft and flirty on the show, because the ship is this too, banter and flirting and caring. And Harry Potter references, because NERDS

She’d heard the rumors - she knew all his moves even though he’d only tried a couple on her.

Rebecca really wants to sound tough and experienced and weary, but it just comes across as longing and vaguely jealous. She knows that he’s playing with her a little, knows that at least part of this is him trying to get her out of his system, but she still wants to see his moves.

Once again, she dismisses any sincerity coming from him - that kiss on her hand wasn’t a move, that was Nathaniel acting on instinct. She’s seen underneath his mask more than a few times, but it would just be easier to believe that he’s planned all of this. If this is all planned seduction she doesn’t have to consider that he actually likes her and she’s actually lovable.

She cannot risk actually caring about him without being sure - or she just can’t let herself care. It’s pretty much too late already, no matter how much she denies it.

She was the first to lean in, placing her hand on his shoulder to pull him down to her level. He went along with it rather easily, a hand on her waist as if they were about to start a whole other dance, and they both already knew the steps to that one.

This time, he would let her lead, let her pull him even closer so that their foreheads were touching.

Forehead touching is my kryptonite. And him letting her lead is important here - and Rebecca notices him giving over power to her. He is vulnerable, and that she is not ready to acknowledge yet.

Of course that was when that damn Gavin kid showed up, banging on the door with the janitor’s keys in his stupid hand.

I had to do it, and of course it had to be George.

Easter Egg: George’s names are all taken from names Sherlock’s called Lestrade on the British show. Because that’s how I roll.

...

Also this is super long and self-indulgent but I hope you appreciate it.

Now back to chapter three, 7k down, a lot more to go.

#catty-words #rethaniel #about my fic #fic: all the men and women merely players #cori is actually the greatest

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