#i cant get myself to play blades | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rissararity · 2 months

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Wrote a little fic inspired by this meme. Art is not mine!

Astarion/Half succubus bard oc. Cat calling, references to SA, comfort, friends to lovers, partners in crime, protective Astarion

Might eventually become a more put together fic, if it does it would be a slow burn friends to lovers

“Do we have any other takers? Any more bets? How about you, sir? Betting man?” the gorgeous bard beamed while she played a melody to raise anticipation on her lute.

“You know what? Sure.” The man tossed a couple gold into the pot.

The crowd cheered while Astarion gave a close lipped smile, eye fucking a couple of the women in the group.

A few more coins trickled in, clinking against the others.

“Now watch and be amazed as I throw this dagger, up to the second floor, it bounces handle side down off that, that then that,” he pointed to a couple of things, “and into the center of that barrel.” He announced with a flourish, parading around dramatically.

While he distracted the crowd, the bard cast a little spell to ensure he’d succeed. Astarion felt the power and confidence surge as her spell took effect, making a big show out of throwing the dagger.

While it flew through the air, Liv took the opportunity to pick a few pockets then make her way to the front before the trick shot was over.

As the blade hit home, the crowd was a mix of cheers and jeers.

“Aww better luck next time, friends!” She offered a supportive smile that hid the inward smirk she felt. She validated a few peoples feelings and casually got each of them to walk away.

The bard scooped up the gold while the rogue retrieved the dagger. They smiled at each other for a moment before quickly and discreetly leaving the area.

To an outsider they’d look like lovers exchanging a look. But they knew they were shit eating grins of victory, and they were in fact not lovers, but 200 gold richer.

Each.

As they reached the end of the alley, they waved to Gale, who stood with hid arms crossed. “Again? Really?” he glared, falling into step on Liv’s other side.

“Oh relax, you benefit from the spoils too. Most of this ends up going to potions and gifts for you.” The half elf snickered, purposely hip bumping him.

The wizard’s glare softened and he ducked his head. “I suppose that’s true. But if you two get caught, you’re on your own.”

The elves smirked at each other, “Somehow I think we’ll manage.” Astarion turned his ruby gaze to Gale who rolled his own.

The men grew uneasy while the trio walked by a group of men who began to whisper after them, staring at Liv in particular. The vampire could have torn their heads off with his bare hands for the disgusting way they spoke about her.

Gale glared back at them, putting an arm around her shoulders protectively. “Honestly, Liv, we can’t take you anywhere civilized.”

“I’d hardly call this place…much less those meat sacks civilized.” Astarion agreed, now wishing he’d been the one to grab her first.

“I’m not doing anything on purpose.” She muttered, dropping her chin.

“Boo hoo, it must be so hard being effortlessly gorgeous.” The vampire rolled his eyes.

“When I cant go anywhere alone without being hassled, propositioned or having wives threaten me for stealing their husband’s eyes-“ “And hearts.” Gale added.

“Right. A few of them did say that.” She pouted, “I know I can more than take care of myself but I get so…” she crossed her arms over her ample chest and shivered with a frown.

The group had noticed fairly early on she seemed fairly oblivious to the leers she got everywhere she went, and that when she no longer was, the attention made her extremely uncomfortable.

She could flirt her way out of trouble no problem but was easily flustered and nervous if a man just started commenting on her body. It made a pit form in her stomach that stayed until someone else from her party found her.

Even Shadowheart had played the role to make the men think they had no chance.

She sighed, “And Astarion,” he looked at her. “You sound jealous when you say stuff like that. You’re too pretty to be jealous.”

Gale smirked as the vampire’s jaw dropped for a moment, blinking in surprise “I…er..um..you’re absolutely right.” He pushed his hair from his face and shook out his shoulders, “You passed the test.”

Liv rolled her eyes while the wizard shook his head, a small smile on his lips.

Red eyes grew annoyed as he saw this, prompting him to cross his arms and pout, “I’ll meet you back at camp.” He strode of into the masses of people on the street.

The pair laughed, keeping their leisurely pace.

“He adores you, you know.” Gale told her once their laughs became little giggles.

Her cheeks grew dark, “No, he would have made a move by now if he did. We’re just good friends.”

He arched an eyebrow, “Is that so?”

She mimicked him, raising her own and dropping her voice, “Yes, that is so.”

The wizard made a face, “You’re too good at that.”

Wind whipped her long blonde hair around while carrying her laugh. “What can I say? I give a performance like no other.”

Liv yelped as a hand seized her elbow. “I bet you do, babe. Why don’t you come with me and give a private show?”

Her entire body froze as ice set in, eyes wide with fear as her legs stopped moving.

“I’m going to give you one chance to let go of the lady and be on your way.” Gale’s voice dripped with venom in a way she’d only ever heard in situations like this.

The barbarian sized him up then laughed, yanking her arm confidently, causing her to stumble closer. “Fuck off, mate. If you can’t defend your woman, don’t bring her outside.”

They couldnt go throwing magic in the middle of town, the creep knew that.

What he didn’t expect, was Gale to cast a hold person spell, locking him into place.

He then gently unfurled the man’s fingers from Liv’s arm and put a protective arm around her waist. “You need to learn some manners. Best hope we don’t ever meet in a battlefield.”

The man’s eyes burned with rage as Gale pressed a kiss to the still shocked bard’s temple and led them back into the crowd.

She pressed herself into her companion’s side all the way back to camp, trying to match his breathing the entire way.

No one knew what caused this reaction in her, but they had an idea. None dared broach the subject and figured talk if and when she wanted.

Normally in battle, she was fearless and thoughtful. But when confronted with someone like that barbarian she locked up.

When they returned to camp, Astarion had already thought up a snappy quip-the perfect amount of sting and sass.

Unfortunately, it died in his throat as soon as he looked over at them. One look and he knew.

Gale was softly rubbing her forearm, reassuring her while he led her to his tent.

The vampire frowned and exchanged a look with the wizard on the way. He immediately regretted his hasty exit earlier. He noticed pursuers were more easily deterred when she was with more than one man.

Astarion silently crept over to listen, able to hear their magic friend leading her through breathing exercises. When she’d calmed down, Gale finally left the tent to get some dinner.

He was about to stand only for Shadowheart to beat him to it, heading toward Gale’s tent to comfort the half elf.

Annoyed as he was, he knew for Liv’s sake that only one person could be with her at a time.

Much to his dismay, she stayed for an entire hour and a half.

He started to head over only to stop in his tracks when the tent door moved and Liv emerged, looking tired but otherwise okay other than her red cheeks and the fact that she used a spell to change her appearance to the one she preferred-the one that more clearly showed her half-drow ancestry.

Her skin kept its pink hue but her hair shortened to a pixie cut, blonde at the root morphing into silver tips that sat perfectly in place. Her blue eyes shifted to one bright blue and one silver. A ring sat in her septum above her lips that wore a coat of black paint, matching her winged eyeliner and eyeshadow.

Her pointed ears were dotted with two in her cartilage on both sides, and a silver ring on the lobe. She bore tattoos of solid black up her throat with flame-like tendrils licking at her jaw, a small flame adorning her forhead.

This was who she preferred to be. Who she felt the strongest, and most confident as. It was also her defense.

The others knew not to be surprised or comment on what she decided to look like that day. The long blonde look was always used for public performances; it had even earned her the title “The Angel” by word of mouth.

Astarion thought she was perfect both ways, but he knew the other men liked The Angel, while Shadowheart and Karlach shared his adoration of who he dubbed the demoness, the little devil, and simply the drow.

She hadn’t noticed him, and headed for her bedroll by the fire.

Astarion’s chest tightened as he realized he was too late to comfort her. If he hadn’t ditched her this probably wouldn’t have happened. They’d be sitting around the fire while she played her lute and told them legends and stories.

He should have stayed. This was his fault.

He should have stayed.

Jaw clenched, he thought, I’ll never abandon you again, my angel. You have my word I will remain close at hand.

What he couldn’t see, was her small smile as their tadpoles relayed the message in his voice.

In fact, he'd been so distracted that all his thoughts of guilt and protectiveness were made privy to the blonde.

He didn’t know it, but they grew closer that night without him ever speaking a word.

The following morning when they returned to the little town of Hodge to continue their search for information. Gale noticed Liv go out of her way to insure they passed by the same intersection from last night.

It was fairly early and the roads were fairly clear, blue sky above them.

As they neared it, Gale stepped forward and took her hand. To everyone’s surprise, she turned her blue and silver gaze to Astarion and held her other hand out to him.

Shadowheart pouted as the visibly confused vampire somewhat hesitantly took her hand and walked on her other side.

Liv squeezed both of their hands as they strode down the road like they owned it. When they got to the next street, she pressed a kiss to the back of Astarion’s hand and gave him a grateful look before letting go and repeating the gesture with Gale.

The vampire blinked in surprise as an odd fluttering feeling danced in his stomach, Gale’s cheeks darkened a little as he returned her smile.

He followed her blindly like they were magnetized, eyes wide as he tried to make heads or tails of this feeling.

Her still short hair shined like silver in the sun, contrasting the warm, sunny light from the blonde near her scalp. Even painted with dark makeup, she was breath taking-silver septum ring glinting back at him a top her confident smile.

Especially when she was exuding confidence like she now was, leading them through the streets to their first contact.

Her rapier carefully tucked into her overcoat, lute strapped to her back, she walked through intersection exuding joy once again.

Astarion’s maroon eyes stayed locked on her profile while he continued to remain at her side. Gale went to talk to Karlach, leaving the two side by side leading the group.

The vampire's eyes flicked down to her hand, yearning to hold it again; to feel her soft, dainty hands in his calloused but well manicured ones.

The butterflies in his stomach hadn’t quite settled down yet-he’d heard some young women gossiping recently and learned that’s what it was called.

Though if it meant what they insinuated it did he refused to believe that was what was happening to him.

He supposed Liv was pretty enough…oh who was he kidding? They didn’t call her The Angel for nothing. She was beauty incarnate, in both of her forms. Her movements were naturally elegant and graceful, her acrobatics during battle were unreal.

Everywhere she went an air of lavender and vanilla followed. You couldn’t be in a bad mood when she was around-he would know. He tried.

She was exactly what Cazador would have sent him after.

At that, he looked away from her shamefully. He didn’t deserve to walk beside her, figuratively or literally. His steps slowed so he could merge with the others but this stopped when her hand brushed the back of his – making his breath catch for a moment as sparks shot up his arm.

She caught his eye and winked, a small smile on her soft lips. “Walk with me, Astar.”

He was about to scold her for the nickname but for some reason from her he didn’t mind it.

“Gale holds your arm through town.” He murmured quietly as they walked.

Her cheeks darkened, “So he does.”

“It’s only fair-rr- I mean….proper.” He collected himself. “It’s only proper that a lady gets escorted.” He raised his chin, keeping his eyes ahead.

“Of course.”

“After all, you tend to get sidetracked and lost.”

“Sounds like me.”

“Hells forbid you see a cat!”

A little annoyed now, she glared, “Are you gonna do it or what?”

“Of course I am, don’t be stupid!” Came his rushed reply just before he almost aggressively looped arms with her like Gale often did.

Behind them, the entire team silently laughed. Gale crossed his arms over his chest, batting away Shadowheart to pretended to try and loop arms with him. He turned away from her and glared playfully before pushing her into Karlach who caught her then gave her arm a reassuring pat before going back to minding her business.

Astarion glared venomously at any one that looked at them too long, thankfully only a few people due to her still being in little demon form. He felt like her bodyguard, and as such had to be the scary dog that made outsiders keep their distance.

And unlike most bodyguards, he actually HAD bite.

Meanwhile, Liv was blissfully unaware of the mission he’d given himself, waltzing down the street casually.

When they arrived at their agreed upon meeting place, Liv wanted to go in alone but the entire group was quick to shut that down.

“Just in and out-it’ll be quick. Everyone leaves happy, no big deal.”

Astarion’s lips quirked up in a grin while he held his laughter, little sounds sneaking out. Karlach immediately began to belly laugh, drawing the attention of a few townspeople. Gale sighed and shook his head while the bard looked at him oddly.

“Sweet summer child.” He pressed a patronly kiss to her temple and hugged her cheek to his chest for a moment.

With knit brows, she let him hold her for a moment. “Anyway, any alternative plans then?”

“Well, you aren’t allowed to go anywhere alone so write that down.” The vampire rolled his eyes, missing her little smile.

“Our best bet here is to not arouse suspicion, and to appear as normal as possible to blend in. I think Liv and I should go in together, since we look the most like the locals." The wizard spoke up.

“Human, you mean?” Shadowheart asked, crossing her arms at the other half-elf.

“And not head to toe in armor. Not exactly common garb in these parts.”

She relented, “Liv and I could go. Two women won’t look odd and I’m sure she has an outfit I can borrow.”

Gale gave a snappy retort, angering the Cleric. They bickered over who was going in with Liv until Karlach physically turned their heads to show them Astarion had already whisked her away and toward little café, both in all their silver headed glory.

After casting an apologetic look over her shoulder, she spoke “You didn’t ask me to put on the angel.”

He paused, “I’ll never ask you to change, darling. However you feel best is how I want you.”

She squeezed his arm, smiling up at him while he avoided her gaze.

Luckily everything went according to plan for once and they got another lead.

Before they returned to their team, waiting in the distance in the town square, they decided to slip out the back door to see if they could make a few extra coins.

Liv put on the angel to aid in the con on her own accord, excitement in her stomach as she and Astarion approached a small group of people already with a game in progress.

---

“Where is she? I need to see her.” Astarion pushed past Shadowheart and headed toward Wyll’s tent.

“She’s going to live. Don’t interrupt her healing session. It’s…private.” She trailed after him, wishing Wyll hadn’t taken some personal time away so he could cast a hold spell.

Ordinarily Shadowheart was stronger than Astarion, but now he was in a protective rage, eyes blazing like a wildfire as he sought his little devil.

This fueled him to overpower her, tugging free of her grip and delivering a sharp shove that sent her on her ass, blinking in shock.

He entered the bubble of silence cast around Gale’s tent and froze as he recognized the sounds of lust and sex, as well as the all to familiar scents that went along with it.

His blood ran cold as he hid and peaked in. He knew what to expect but was still aghast when he saw Gale on top of Liv.

Liv’s nude body was dotted with scrapes and bruises from their last fight, her head lulled to the side, eyes half open. She didn’t react much to the wizards deliberate, confident thrusts, her breasts bounced in recoil to punctuate each one.

Gale bit his lip, brows knit as he began to speed up. Liv's shallow breaths along with a few gasps softly joined the other sounds.

Astarion felt rage like never before and had the biggest urge to reach straight through Gale’s back and pull out his still beating heart.

But he knew that was a bad idea.

Liv’s head turned to the other side and she accidently met the vampire’s eyes, her own going from half lidded to wide, cheeks ablaze.

Feeling much like a scorned lover, though not sure why, he silently sneered at her and left.

The following morning, the air was tense between the two troublemakers-Astarion and Liv.

Gale hadn’t noticed him, and she hadn’t told him.

She avoided her rogue as much as possible without drawing attention, seeking a distraction.

Otherwise back to her normal self, she pulled her violin from her bag of holding and began to play an upbeat jig, a smile on her face as she watched Karlach and Wyll prepare breakfast.

Gale and Shadowheart clapped in time with the music, smiling and enjoying the morning.

His eyes narrowed at Gale as he approached, considering how he could catch the wizard’s robe on fire, stopping short to watch the end of the song.

Liv hesitated a bit upon seeing him, but being the professional she is, she didn’t let it hiccup the song. Gale noticed the jovial mood in her eyes dulled, and used his tadpole to connect to the vampire -immediately realizing what had happened.

The bard finished the song with a flourish of her bow then bowed for the applause that came from everyone that didn’t drink blood.

Gale connected to Liv for a moment to see if she knew, appreciating that she told him the truth and didn’t make him search her memory.

I think it’s time to tell him, Angel. He’s the only one that doesn’t know and he’s clearly upset.

She sighed, I have to, now. We can’t keep going like this.

He gave a short nod, then made an excuse about wanting to show Liv how to feel the weave so they could both go into the woods together.

They were correct in assuming Astarion’s jealousy would have him tailing them.

Once they were away from camp, his body froze mid-step as Gale cast a hold person spell on him.

The pair turned around and headed over to him, ignoring the slew of curse words falling from his fangs.

“What in the hells do you think you’re doing?!” He growled at last.

“We need to talk- and by that I mean you need to listen. We can’t have you attacking Gale or running off before we explain.”

He glared at her, inwardly annoyed that the passing breeze carried over her lavender scent.

“I’m not sure what I saw other than the two of you acting like a couple of randy teenagers.”

Liv crossed her arms, nodding, “That’s exactly why you’re stuck right now.”

Gale’s lip quirked up for a moment at her flat tone before he spoke, “That’s all you saw? Are you absolutely sure there was nothing else of note?”

“Gale, darling, I’m not going to comment on the size of your staff if that’s what you’re fishing for.”

The wizard blinked in shock, blushing, “No! No that’s not what I meant.”

Standing slightly behind him, Liv giggled, cutting herself off when Astarian glared at her again.

“Think back. Really think-I’ll even help you.” She cast a focus spell on him while he huffed and closed his eyes.

His mind’s eye took him back Gale’s tent, his eyes glued to the scene before him. Liv looked exhausted from their last battle. Her body was scraped and bruised here and there and bags sat under her eyes.

Her baby blues lacked the spark they usually held.

The vampire knit his brows, growling at the other man. “Did you do something to her?”

Gale’s jaw dropped, Liv spoke up and vehemently denied it.

“It’s not like that either. I look right as rain today, right?” she gestured to her face- bright and clear as always.

He nodded.

“You know I’m a half elf, right?”

“Of course. Drow-correct?”

Liv smiled, happy he remembered that given her normal, warm and sunny appearance. “Right. Well…it turns out…the other half wasn’t human.”

“I’m sure you’ve noticed Liv is much more adept at magic than a normal bard…hells I’ve been trying to convince her to let me train her as a spellcaster…”

She rolled her eyes.

“Anyway, the other half…my father…was an incubus. So…I’m half elf half-“

“Succubus.” Astarion sneered, “It all makes sense now. The power you hold over others with the simple toss of your hair.”

They waited to see what he would say next, giving him a moment to think.

“That’s why you look so much better than you did…last night.”

She nodded, “I seem to have an odd mix of traits and abilities. My little demon appearance can’t be washed away by any manor of magic because it’s still real. When I take after my father, I become the angel. But my mother was the drow.”

“It doesn’t trigger my detect magic ability either.” Gale added, “Because of her half succubus nature, every week or so she needs to be…reset, or she gets sickly and weak.”

“That’s why she’s gotten so much stronger since the began traveling together.”

Liv blushed and shuffled her feet, “Look, I’m really not as smooth as I pretend to be-its an act.”

The vampire was quiet for a long while, “So when you say you cant sleep alone-“

The half elf gasped, “Not every night! God’s Astarion I’m not an animal! Gale told you…once a week. I try to hold out for as long as I can though…” she looked down, “I know it’s a big ask. More often than not I just need to cuddle.”

Gale patted her shoulder, a kind smile on his lips. “I assure you it’s no toil for us. I admit it can be difficult when you’re…in rough shape but knowing it’s the best way we can help you-“

“Mmmhm nothing to do with the fact that you get to have sex with her, I’m sure.” The vampire cut him off, winking when he was done.

The wizard’s warm brown eyes widened, cheeks darkening-it was certainly not a chore, but an honor.

Liv quirked an eyebrow at him, stifling a laugh and trying to force the corner of her mouth down.

Astarion relaxed as he watched her reaction to this. His jealousy faded as he realized for Gale, and hopefully Wyll, this was a friends with benefits situation, not a romantic relationship.

“Oh do let me go now. I’m listening.”

After a nod from Liv, Gale released the hold spell.

Astarion straightened himself and pushed his hair back, shaking off the stiffness. “The girls were already aware, I’m assuming?”

Liv nodded. “Unfortunately, my succubus healing only seems to kick in with men. I guess I need a…bridge to transfer.”

“You had sex with Shadowheart?”

Gale raised an eyebrow, “You tried to.”

“Well yes, but for a different reason. It’s not the same.”

“If anything, my reason is better than yours.” Liv glared.

He tilted his head, “Is it? Who’s to say? Besides, it only makes sense to gather as many…potential healers as possible and keep one on hand at all times. It was smart of you to try, since the two of you normally pair up when we split.”

Silence for a beat.

"Though I must tell you, I thought we were closer than this, little angel.” He turned to her. “Why was I the only one left unaware of your…condition? Did you not want my…” he gestured to his body, “help.”

Gale turned to her, too, curious.

The bard blushed, keeping her eyes on the ground. “We've always been great friends and I didn’t want to risk making it weird.”

“So you didn’t think it weird to proposition your companions weekly to steal their energy when they orgasm?”

Silence.

“It's really not bad. One sip of a health potion and you're back to rights.” Gale defended her.

“Alright, well,” he approached Liv, who shyly looked up. “This doesn’t change anything between us, darling, not if you don’t want it to.” He tilted her chin with one finger. “But if you decide you do, I assure you I’m more than capable of not treating you any differently if we slept together; dearest friend of mine.”

Her cheeks blazed, lips parting in shock. Gale rolled his eyes and looked away while the two had a moment.

He knew his friendship with Liv was clearly different than whatever it was she had with Astarion, so hearing her admit that hadn’t stung like one might expect. It was no secret the two had more in common, more laughs and a knack for getting in and out of trouble.

Gale, as well as Wyll, knew what this was.

Giving the half elf a wink, Astarion turned around and headed back toward camp.

She didn't ask for his help yet, but he hoped she would.

And when she did he would be whatever she wanted him to be; a simple friend with benefits due to a caring heart and sense of obligation or...maybe...

Well he wasn't sure but he was looking forward to her helping him find that out.

#astarion #astarion fanfic #bg3 fanfiction #bg3 memes #astarion bg3 #baldurs gate astarion #baldurs gate 3 #bandurs gate 3 astarion #astarion x tav #astarion x oc #bg3 fanfic #dom astarion #protective astarion #astarion is baby girl #astarion is a cat

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pix3lplays · 10 months

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hi again!! gepard,dan heng,welt,jing yuan and blade with a teen!reader who simply cant sleep?

so since they cant sleep they just make it [insert character]’s problem by clinging to them during nightime asking for lullabies,company etc.

also, a tiny reminder; please dont forget to take care of yourself!! :)))

-star ruby anon

I like, let’s do it! And I’ll take care of myself, thank you💕

-(Platonic) Honkai star rail men with a teen!reader who can’t sleep-

Gepard Landau: You want a lullaby?? From Gepard Landau?? THE Gepard Landau? Notorious for his…beautiful singing?? Okay but it’s on you when you end up disappointed and a little bit concerned with how someone could be That Bad at singing.

Dan Heng: Dan Heng is a bit of a night owl. If you’re struggling to sleep then fine, join him in the archives, the two of you can go through files until you’re bored enough to sleep.

Welt Yang: Welt Yang prefers to go to bed at a reasonable hour, but if you’re really struggling to sleep, then fine, he’ll stay up with you and play card games until you’re inevitably ready to hit the hay. Right? You’ll eventually be tired, surely??

Jing Yuan: Jing Yuan also prefers going to bed at a reasonable hour, but if you’re insistent and nag him enough then he’ll stay up with you and play some starchess until you’re ready to fall asleep.

Blade: I could see Blade as a bit of a night owl, to be honest. I don’t think he’d have a problem keeping you company, getting in some training til you’re finally ready to actually fall asleep.

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strawberrybabydog · 3 months

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for me, some level of trauma related to being the least-favourite child is directly related to playing videogames and boredom

growing up my younger sister got handed the SNES controller and i didnt. she played with my parents and by herself and i watched but didnt play. sometimes this was because i wasnt allowed and other times i thought it was a choice, even though, my choice was because i didnt know how to play and if i asked my mom would have said "really? you want me to start a whole new save file JUST for you?" and i would have quietly said nevermind, and remembered not to ask ever again

when we got a wii, for my sister's birthday she got 2 wii games. for my birthday i got decorations even though i was too young to understand what a decoration is and i just tried playing with them (emphasis on try). sometimes i would come home from school and my sister would have a random gift (something i never got) - another wii game! because it was on sale at blockbuster, and oh sorry Luna, we didnt get anything for you because they didnt have anything you would like.

by the end of our wii, i had 1 wii game that was mine - i chose whenever i wanted to play it, for how long, and if anyone else wanted to play it they had to ask. that was the rules, because it was mine. my younger sister has 11 wii games.

when i was in middle school, i was not allowed to get a better (real) console. it was too expensive. plus, we have the wii, it works perfectly fine, just play on that. m...my one game? that i've been playing since i was 9? that i've 100%'d 5 times? yes.

when i was in highschool i wasnt allowed to have money, especially not to spend online. "luckily" i met an internet friend who was a hacker and sold what he claimed to be abandoned steam accounts. he gave me one for free. i played stardew valley and oblivion religiously, because my laptop was built in 2010 and could barely handle the lowest graphics settings of a game several years older than it. it ended up getting double-hacked so after a year of using it, i once again had no more videogames

now im an adult and i just... cant play videogames. basically none of them. after abut 30 minutes of playing i get so anxious that i have to stop. i havent played stardew valley in about 2 years, my favourite game of all time that i used to stay up until 8am playing.

the game loads, and im anxious because i forget the controls. i walk up to an npc and get anxious because if i dont pick the perfect dialogue tree, im failing myself by not being perfect, so i'll pause the game and go on my phone for 10 minutes to find the answer (i HATE doing this.) i approach a puzzle and im anxious because what if im not smart enough to solve it and i fail again? i need to check if anyone's in the room with me now because if anyone is watching me play they'll know i'm a failure too so i should stop playing. but, videogames are communal (they must be,) i have only ever experienced playing them with someone else there (watching sibling/parents play, watching youtube letsplays) but if someone else sees me fail i'm the worst person ever. and i mean, realistically, how do you even play a videogame for more than 1 hour? how do focus on 1 thing for that long? sounds fake to me

but... i want to play videogames. i know they're experiences. and i want to have experiences. especially because as a disabled person my only other option is youtube. so if i'm not playing videogames, i'm bored out of my skull laying in bed, doing nothing, staring at my youtube screen watching the exact same video essay for the 6th or 7th time this week because the algorythm's only other choice is "perfect damascus steel knife blade DIY"

other than youtube, what am i supposed to do? i cant play videogames - i'm not perfect at them, i cant focus, and i just dont deserve them. there is nothing else.

#and im not even touching on how this has othered me socially #i had to go to high school and listen to my friends talk about playing soulsborne while i had to go home and play fucking #my sims kingdom for the wii. that was my game. that was the 1 game i had #i didnt even choose it either. or ask for it. or know what it was. my parents bought it because it was in the fucking clearance bin #once again i should emphasize that there was no reason for them to treat me this way at fucking all #i am autistic but i am also like very fucking normal. painfully so #i was especially a very normal child #but in their brains they just see me as the RWord and that's enough justification to not give me things that i need or make me happy #sorry for posting this on this blog i pretty much have 1 friend and she talks to me like once a week lol #personal #not dog #parental trauma #yes im including this as trauma btw i literally cry when faced with the task of playing a video game i literally panic #there's also something to be said about growing up in a hypermisogynistic environment and how living with 1 male and 1 TV #makes me immediately give up videogame powers to him. like. why am i playing the tv im a girl he's in charge He should be playing videogame #big shout out to the 0 people who will read this entire post why tf am i posting this oh riiighhht i have no friends. ok tumblr post now

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empty-blog-for-lurking · 9 months

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Here's my pitch for vld sequel. Based on bnha world's hero mission, a movie i have never seen from a series i stopped watching a long time ago (do not take seriously) #Alluralives #Kuronlives-

• Keith and Pidge get framed for like a very serious crime and are on the run and wanted across the universe.

• Allura is alive and there and it is never confirmed how (Someone: Wait, Princess Allura? Didnt you die? How are you still alive? Allura: Oh yeah i did almost die! However *background loud car crash noises, machine revving sounds, things falling sounds, cats sound in the background. Just basically that One troupe™, you know the one* and that is how i survived.)

• Kuron is also alive, it is also never confirmed how (Some completely random bullshit: *happens* Kuron: This is just like the day i came back to life)

• Anyway while Keith and Pidge are on the run, Allura and Coran are handling the diplomacy front since you know Keith and Pidge are both pretty high profile, Kuron Hunk and Matt along the Blades handle damage control, communication and extraction of Keith and Pidge. Shiro and Lance have the arguably the most important job, find out whodunnit while also distracting the detectives on the case from getting too close to Keith and Pidge.

• Lance and Shiro take this job Very very Seriously.

• Like Lance is playing up the dumb goofball as he "accidentally" "loses" the evidence and just doesnt seem to be "taking the job seriously" or is "unable to follow the instructions" really Detective, dont you know? The Blue Paladin is a very clumsy carefree guy! Honest!!!

• Shiro meanwhile is playing up the straight laced bureucrat rule follower. "No we can not go down there yet! We have to follow the protocol!!" Shiro says having never followed that protocol ever. "I am sorry but the rules clearly state we have to do this in this time consuming way" Shiro says knowing full well that rule is ancient and doesnt apply anymore. "I understand your concerns, however the procedure X95t-78v is a vital procedure required for any paperwork to go futher," Shiro says, he made that procedure up.

• Detective's partner suspects they are both full of shit, but cant prove it. Detective knows full well they are both full of shit, CAN prove it, but doesnt really care about it, because she's like 75% sure Keith and Pidge didnt do it.

• The Detective is by the way straight out of a Noir film, like it legit goes black and white when it is her pov and has full noir style narration going on, and she smells of cigars and coffee and rain and is also sopping wet and divorced

• Hunk goes from, "Ok guys i know this is hard but please you have to listen to us, we just want to keep you guys safe." To "I will literally throw hammers at both of you and get you arrested myself if you two dont shut the fuck up."

• Kuron is just vibing man, just chilling, doing his job, a bit red-eyed. He might be a bit high (he needs that weed to keep Traumas™ at bay)

• Allura is fighting for her life trying to handle the diplomacy front and put out fires. Everytime she and Coran make some headway Keith and Pidge end up on the front news after causing mayhem in some random planet and she has to start all over again

• Lance just knows soooo many people. He knows a Guy™ for everything. When asked he's like, "Oh it was during the time when Keith was off with BoM and Lotor was in ship. I kinda didnt have much to do so i just went off on my own." Lance, Lance why do you know these space pirates? Lance why do you know a famed recluse blacksmith who apparently also is a spy? Lance why do you know this mythic species thought to be long extinct? Lance why do you know a god of death? How the fuck do you know a God of Death, and why-why are they calling you babygirl?

• There is another God who knows Coran and calls him babygirl btw

• My main goal here is to gaslight people. There are some facts that were totally canon but reintepreted in a way that wasnt the writers intent. There are some facts that are canon but a little bit molded. There is atleast one episode/season that is hinted to be a mass hallucination and not canon at all. It works best if Netflix removes the original and its wiki gets corrupted./j

• Lgbtqia+ rep is Shiro and Curtis navigating their relationship through long distance, their own trauma and the post war era universe, atleast 2 characters being the focus in a valentine day episode only to come out as aroace, and a B-plot about Lance having just the most atrocious taste in men. Like men you wont believe were allowed to exist.

• i'll add more if i think of more

Dreamworks hire me/j

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generalsmemories · 9 months

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ifound a post abt jing yuan from someone and i rlly wnanna know what u think abt the cutscene w luocha and jingliu ToT im not head deep into lore but i got the gist of it. im so concerned for this man. 3/4 of his besties r criminals, supposed to be dead hates each other one doesnt even remember anything blade cant die whatever jingliu is upto w susboy merchant is probably not good and the 1/4 baiheng is dead-dead (i fink) ToT how does he livew w it

saurs if i got it all wrong the highcloud quintet is a mess and jing yuan is the minimum wage sweeper

spoilers ahead so if you haven't played through the 1.3 epilogue of xianzhou look away

with every new patch i fear for this mans health and wellbeing fr fr.

The High Cloud Quintet lore is just the meme of me going: WANNA SEE HOW MUCH I CAN CRY? before i proceed to sob my entire soul out at this point i love these people so unnaturally much that the fallout is just a big slap over and over again.

I can also go on about High Cloud Quintet but for the sake of my sanity I won't-

The cutscene with Jingliu and Luocha very much insinuates that we're going to return to the Xianzhou in the future, which I do hope we get more explantion this time around because how the storytellers handled Xianzhou was very much an up and down rollercoaster with an anticlimatic ending. (i just like jing yuan so i can hype myself enough by seeing his 3D model on screen, but otherwise the ending left much more to be desired).

As for the actual cutscene - Jingliu here ready to actually go for the Aeon herself and not the abominations who worship them. I don't know how much of her sanity is left within her since I have to put on my actual reading comprehension glasses on to piece stuff together from my own notes HAHAHA All I can say is that Luocha actually hating Yaoshi with a passion was a bit unexpected, but I'm very much up for this expy of Otto to kill an Aeon whose whole goal is to give life to people wanting it.

Jing Yuan left behind to fix whatever the hell happened. He may have not suffered as much as the other 4, BUT BOY DOES HE HAVE TO KEEP REMEMBERING THEM TO PROTECT THE XIANZHOU LMFAO

#narus' message corner #anon #IM DARN SURE THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU WANTED TO READ AS A RESPONSE BUT I JUST SAW HIGH CLOUD QUINTET AND ZEROED IN ON THAT #THE OTHER STUFF BECAME AN AFTERTHOUGHT #but at the moment dear anon my head is empty #no thoughts only jing yuan #give me 2-3 business days before i suddenly make a post screaming.#i can guarantee you it's bound to happen sobs

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moonlogw · 2 years

Text

dont touch her

*since Ghost is becoming real popular on tiktok, my obsession with this man has come back full swing

** for reference I haven't played COD: Modern Warfare since about 2017.(nor have I played the reboot) This drabble is strictly to satisfy my own mind and comes solely from my 15 year old brain rot lmao. This does not portray Simon Riley, or Soap in any way that is accurate to canon bc like i said i haven't played the games in forever... nor do i feel like doing research

might revisit in a few months when i replay all the games

TW: Badly written, mentions of d3ath, kn!ves, guns, blood, t0rture

PROMPT: Main Character must watch as love interest is t0rtur*d by villain and cant do anything about it.

-----------------

“This doesn’t have to be painful,” the Man in Black says. His mottled face of scars twists unnaturally into a cruel smile. I stare at him in complete defiance, my face tilted away as his hand reaches out towards me.

“Don’t touch her,” Ghost threatens lowly. He can barely keep his head up, let alone look at me. From the wheezing I hear coming from his direction, I know that the Man in Black hurt him really bad, maybe even cracked some ribs.

The Man in Black turns to my soldier, but not before I see the playful amusement flash in his eyes. My heart kicks into overdrive, the need to protect Ghost from this man outweighing my need to keep myself calm until Soap finds us. My breath comes out in short, panicked bursts as I tried to speak over the tape covering my mouth. I try to scream, try to yell, to do something to get his attention. The Man in Black either doesn’t hear me or doesn’t care. He creeps over to Ghost, crouching right beside his slumped figure and tugs on his vest. Ghost can’t keep himself straight and falls to the side, leaning his entire body weight onto the slim arm of the chair.

“What did you say?” The Man in Black says lowly, his voice taking on a sinister tone. I cant hold back the terrifying sound that tries to push past the tape over my mouth as he rips Ghost’s head back at an unnatural angle.

Ghosts’ coal rimmed eyes meet mine for a solid second, long enough for me to shake my head vigorously. This isn’t smart. They know not to speak. They know not to reveal any weaknesses. Showing any kind of softness for her would surely lead to more pain for the both of them.

“I said,” Ghost whispers, making the man lean in closer. “don’t touch her.”

Before the man has time to react, Ghost is reeling his head back in some new found vigor and smacking his head against the other’s. I jump in my seat, wishing I could do something other than sit here. The Man in Black goes stumbling back, shock stretched across his features. A growl rips from his throat and his hand is moving faster than Ghost can move away from. The knife comes from nowhere, planting itself in Ghosts’ thigh as a scream is ripped from his throat.

I try to scream again. I try to make a sound. Its useless..

Finally, the Man in Black turns to me. His entire face is scrunched in fury, and he marches over to me and yanks my head back by my hair. “Filthy British,” he seethes and produces another knife.

Agony explodes in my face. Heat sears across my vison and warm wet liquid pours across my face. I scream behind the tape, kicking and squirming against my binds. Blood streamed slow and steady across my face as he cut three more lines into my face, hot against my lips before dripping off my chin and landing in my thighs. I feel it seep under the tape, wiggling its way into my mouth. I want to gag. I want to suck in jagged breaths as my stomach threatens to empty everything. But its all trapped. Panic loops its way through my head as I imagine the sick stuck in my mouth. Faintly I head Ghost shouting.

“Stop. Stop. Don’t touch her!” Ghost is vicious, fighting against his binds wildly. He bucks in his chair, eyes manic. “You piece of shit leave her alone!”

The Man hovers over me, blood dripping from his blade. I stare at it with wide eyes. My heart clenches and the room spins. No amount of training could have prepared me for this. No amount of time in the field, or time with this team could have prepared me for this man and his wicked head. He kills people for pleasure. For the first time, I doubt that Soap will make it to us in time.

“What will you do, soldier?” The Man in Black taunts. “What will you do while tied to my chair?”

“I am going to fucking kill you,” Ghost snarls.

“Is that so?”

“Pray to whatever god you believe in,” Ghosts eyes go dark, head tilting down. “Because you wont make it there.”

The Man lets out a full belly laugh. The idea actually amuses him but he doesn’t know what my soldier is capable of.

It all happens so fast. The ceiling above us explodes. Rock and dirt fall on us as men drop form the ceiling. Suddenly, Ghost is out of his chair, running for me. Soap is standing on the other side of the room. The Man in Black is hauling me out of my chair.

“Let her go!” Soap yells over the commotion. Half a dozen guns are trained on us.

The cold metal of a barrel is pressed to my temple.

Ghost is frozen in his tracks, hands out complacently towards us. My panic is a real and tangible thing now. Its hot and heavy and so big I could hold it in my hands. I look to Ghost with wide scared eyes. His are filled with dread. I wish I could say something. I wish I could tell him everything. But I cant.

And I never will.

A chorus of shouts erupt as the trigger is pulled. The last thing I see is Ghost rushing towards me, his hands stretched out as if he could catch me in time.

Other guns go over, riddling the Man in Black in lead and we both go tumbling down.

Then the world goes dark.

Ghost reaches her as soon as the bullets hit the ground. He drags her away from the rubble and into his arms. The room is quiet, almost like he is in his own vacuum of space and time and it was just them. Her eyes are open, staring unseeing ahead.

She was gone. Just like that. Only two seconds and she is gone.

#ghost #simon riley #simon ghost riley #call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #modernwarfare #codmw #writing prompt

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artyandink · 1 year

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Ive not requested anything before so I’m not really sure what to say, sorry if this doesn’t make any sense

But an Anthony Lockwood enemies to lovers would be so good, like maybe she’s friends with Lucy and followed her to London but cant stand Anthony, in the beginning at least.

I’ve been looking for one and i cant seem to find any, maybe I’m not looking hard enough lmao.

Thank you :) :) :)

HATE YOU AND I HATE MYSELF FOR LOVING YOU TOO

Blades clashed and scraping occurred, grating the ears of those near.

“Feeling tired?”

“Not in the slightest.” I sneered, determined to win this match. I knocked his blade to the floor, pointing mine at his neck. “Touché. How does it feel to lose?”

“I haven’t.” He used his foot to whisk his rapier back into his hand, flicking mine expertly and letting it hit the wall far away, putting me in the position I put him a second ago. “You have. Sorry, Rhys, but you’ll have to do better next time. But better still won’t be enough.”

“Shove off, you narcissistic sod.” I spat, picking up my rapier. “You’ve played that move so many times it’s old.”

“Yet it always works. I wonder why.”

Blades clashed and scraping occurred, grating the ears of those near.

“Feeling tired?”

“Not in the slightest.” I sneered, determined to win this match. I knocked his blade to the floor, pointing mine at his neck. “Touché. How does it feel to lose?”

“Shove off, you narcissistic sod.” I spat, picking up my rapier. “You’ve played that move so many times it’s old.”

“Yet it always works. I wonder why.”

“Because you’re a one-trick pony?”

“Not as bad as a no-good, has-been sloth.” We made faces as each other, Lockwood going back to George and me to Lucy and Artemis. “How am I meant to win against him?”

“I dunno. I can’t spot any weakness.” Lucy shrugged. Artemis shook her head, laughing.

“Wrong way to see this, Lucy. We agreed that this match has no rules. Play it that way.” Artemis strategised. “He’ll follow the rules of fencing better than you will, and I have one more thing you can try.”

“What?”

“Seduction. Works every time.”

“Oh come on, Arty, that isn’t fair.” Lucy tutted.

“Anthony Lockwood gets surprised at the thought of any woman being interested in him, especially this woman.” She gestured to me. “Give it a whirl, girl, and if it doesn’t help you win then you can slap me.”

I stepped up, determined, wielding my rapier. “Ready to lose, Lockwood?”

“I’ve never lost to you before, then why now?”

“Oh, you’ll see, handsome.” I lightly ran my finger down the curve of his jaw, giving an attractive smirk. Lucy watched, surprised that I was capable of flirting, George gave Lockwood a side eye and Artemis just chuckled. It actually was working.

“That’s our girl.” She grinned folding her arms. “Now watch Lockwood’s reaction.”

“H-Handsome?” He stammered, adjusting his tie.

“Yeah, a real sight for sore eyes.” I winked, making George burst out into gales of laughter. This threw Lockwood off, but he still shakily raised his rapier. I raised mine, flicking back my hair.

“En garde.”

“Prêts?”

“Allez!” Still flustered, Lockwood was distracted, giving time for me to cleanly sweep his rapier out of his hand, lodging it into the wall. Artemis fist bumped me, both the ladies acting as my wingwomen in this situation.

“How’s that for a no-good, has-been sloth?” I boasted, putting my rapier back in my scabbard.

“That isn’t fair. You flirted with me!” He protested.

“Last time I checked, the only rule was fight with a rapier.” Artemis argued back. “Rhys won fair and square.”

“It worked, surprisingly.” Lucy added. “Come on, Rhys, we’ll go for tea outside to celebrate.”

“Tea without me?!” George called.

“You’re Lockwood’s wingman, not Rhys’!”

•´¨*•.¸¸.•*´¨•.¸¸.•´¨*•.¸¸.•*•´¨•.¸¸.•´¨`•.¸•´¨*•.¸¸.•*´¨•.¸¸.•´¨*•.¸¸.•*•´¨•.¸¸.•´¨`•.¸

We were sitting in the locally famous cafe Just A Cuppa, drinking tea and coffee and eating delicious pastries. Artemis had taken us here after being recommended the place, but so far no one had said anything. Artemis and Lucy were giving me looks and then exchanging them.

“What?” I asked, exasperated.

“Did you see how much Lockwood was simping for you before the fight?” Lucy smirked.

“No, we hate each other.”

“Or you love each other. You came here with Lucy, I know that, and instead of love at first sight it was hate at first sight, but everything’s changed. Might I remind you, Rhys, that when you first came here, you couldn’t flirt to save your life.” Artemis reminisced. “Gave Marco a little bit of a scare.”

“And now you can easily flirt with Lockwood of all people? Put two and two together, hobo, you’re meant to be!” Lucy added.

“Meant to be?!” I scoffed. “More like meant to stay away.”

•´¨*•.¸¸.•*´¨•.¸¸.•´¨*•.¸¸.•*•´¨•.¸¸.•´¨`•.¸•´¨*•.¸¸.•*´¨•.¸¸.•´¨*•.¸¸.•*•´¨•.¸¸.•´¨`•.¸

“Did she… flirt with me?” Lockwood asked.

“You doth be shooketh.” George chuckled. “She got you real good.”

“But no, we hate each other! She can’t like me!”

“Yes she can.”

“She does. You like her too. Obviously.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Maybe. Can you ask her and report back to me-“

“I’m not an owl!” George snapped. “You’re acting like the arrogant version of Anthony Lockwood.”

“But I am Anthony Lockwood.” Lockwood was slapped on the head with a newspaper, making him wince. “Sorry.”

“Try being compassionate for once. Maybe you’ll get the girl.”

“Try being what now?”

•´¨*•.¸¸.•*´¨•.¸¸.•´¨*•.¸¸.•*•´¨•.¸¸.•´¨`•.¸•´¨*•.¸¸.•*´¨•.¸¸.•´¨*•.¸¸.•*•´¨•.¸¸.•´¨`•.¸

Everyone was playing cards earlier, a nice, fun-

Scratch that.

A tense, pressurising, EXTREMELY COMPETITIVE game of Bluff.

“One ace.” Lockwood announced, throwing his card down. Rhys was next to him, so obviously, fuelled by her deep love hatred for the boy, picked it up, but something was written on the card.

I LOVE YOU, RHYS.

I didn’t have time to process it when I felt a pair of lips on mine, the sensation so perfect and inviting that I lost control of my body, my arms wrapping around their neck. When I pulled back, my eyes widened in horror.

“Lockwood?”

“That’s me.” He grinned, eyelids flickering. I had seen that everyone left the room, so I pulled him back for a kiss again, obliging to being pulled into his lap.

“I… hate… you…” I mumbled between kisses.

“I… hate… you… too.”

“Nah, you love each other.”

“No doy, Sherlock!”

#anthony lockwood x oc #anthony lockwood x reader #anthony lockwood #lockwood and co #artemis hernandez #lucy carlyle #george karim

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