#how funny is it to have a garage full of literal souls???

[spoonyruncible]

I think it would be hilarious if someone sold their Kia Soul to the Devil and I think the Devil would agree and allow it just this once.

#the devil is lying #he thinks it is funny every single time #he now has over 50 kia souls #he loves each one of them #they crack him up every time #how funny is it to have a garage full of literal souls??? #the devil is a huge fucking nerd is my point

[tw-episodereactions]

Teen Wolf 1x06

Apparently his mom doesn’t do all the grocery shopping anymore.

Also, I’m once again struck on what the actual setting is? Beacon Hills has a Sheriff so it’s gotta be rural, but, like. Most of the houses scream affluent suburb, and a multilevel parking garage for a grocery store screams city.

Honestly, Scott, making all those car alarms go off was very smart, I love it.

So this was some sort of training thing by Fuckface? So he’s a terrible teacher too. Not surprised.

Okay, what the fuck? Scott, the Sheriff getting hurt was not your fault, number one. He barely got bumped, number two. And number three you were there? Like, you’d literally saved Allison from getting hit by a car (which would have been a lot worse for her than the Sheriff) like two seconds earlier. And finally, like, you’re sixteen and the Sheriff is an adult? And there were lots of adults there?

Like, I get feeling guilty and scared, but boy do not take that burden on, I beg of you.

“I don’t even know if I can teach you.” Wow, so for weeks you’ve been holding over Scott’s head that you’re the only one who can teach him and now you like, actually I suck and I was mostly lying and manipulating you. Awesome. Fuckface deserves so many awards for each subsequent level of terribleness that he reaches.

Aaaaaand Fuckface gets another award. Goddamit! What the actual fuck is this guy’s problem?

I don’t even know if I can teach you, but I sure am going to make your life as miserable as possible in the meantime. Fuckface doesn’t just want Scott to not have distractions, he wants Scott to not have a life. Which he’s essentially said before.

Also, Scott’s clearly having money problems, they’ve mentioned it several times, and Fuckface just destroyed his phone for no reason. The more I think I can hate this guy the more he proves me wrong.

THIS MAN IS FULL OF BULLSHIT. HE IS LYING TO YOU. YOU HAVE SHIFTED SEVERAL TIMES WITHOUT ANGER AS THE IMPETUS AND YOU HAVE SHIFTED BACK WITHOUT USING PAIN.

Fuckface is full of anger and pain and he’s trying to make you like him: a tragedy of a barely human soul that only cares about cruelty to others.

“This is the only way that I can teach you,” is very telling. He did not say, this is the only way that you can learn. He’s terrible for you, Scott, and I wish you could/would get away from him.

Lol, if you can teach me, I can stay away from her, is also telling. Because it’s clear Fuckface can’t teach him, so why should he stay away?

Once again, I have to wonder if Kate is supposed to be breadcrumbing Allison or if she’s doing it against her parent’s wishes.

See, that’s the thing when you sneak up on the kid for no reason you’ve now trained him to think it’s you being a Fuckface and not an actual threat.

Funny how the Alpha is just hanging outside the Argent place. You’d think they’d have some sort of protection or warding or traps or something.

Spiral again.

Btw, I’ve just realized that Fuckface has probably caused Scott almost an equal amount of trauma as the Alpha has.

“You can’t ask me to trust you and then keep things to yourself,” is 100% fucking valid, Scott. But you should literally never trust him, he’s been nothing but awful to everyone, but most especially to you.

What the fuck does that even mean? It’s worse than you beating him and hurting him for no reason? It’s worse than the Alpha wanting to kill bond with Scott or just kill Scott in general?

Or is it worse for you, Fuckface? Is it worse because it will make you look even worse in Scott’s eyes than you do right now and cause him not to trust you even more?

Cause I’m feeling like that’s more accurate.

What the fuck is Stiles’ problem?

Oh so this is where Scott is getting the guilt about the Sheriff getting hurt. Well Stiles can fucking suck it. It still wasn’t anywhere in the realm of being Scott’s fault.

At least Stiles and I agree on Fuckface being useless.

Love the loudly talking in the halls about Scott killing people.

Umm, wait. Okay, so, like, Fuckface is bad news, but Stiles has literally never had a good plan. I mean, sometimes they worked, but mostly by accident, and I am scared for them.

I’m thinking back to the first episode when Stiles said something like Scott was dragging him down by his nerdiness. Like, Stiles. Bro. I do not think the nerdiness is all from Scott.

Once again, Stiles strikes me as a cop’s kid and that’s not a compliment. Rich kids and cops kids always, always think the rules don’t apply to them, and it’s anger inducing how often they’re right.

The heart rate thing theoretically makes sense, but I’m incredibly concerned about the duct taped wrists. Why are we not just having him do wind sprints or something?

Why do all of these people conflate anger and pain? They’re not actually the same thing.

Also

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK, STILES? Scott is getting beat up all the time by Derek, he’s being stalked and hurt by the Argents and the Alpha and now he gets to be beat up by you? WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK.

We have already established that while Scott can heal, it still hurts. How many times has he had to deal with physical trauma in the last two months? Fifteen times. Twenty?

He’s averaging once every couple of days. And by people purporting to help him! This cannot be good for his mental health, honestly.

Scott, buddy, that doesn’t make any sense. Allison doesn’t make you weaker, and also, you totally controlled the shift after like a minute, which is way faster than it’s taken you in the past. I absolutely do not condone Stiles beating the fuck out of you with lacrosse balls, but it proved the opposite of what you think it did, my dude.

Not a fan of that hallucination, but the effect was nice.

Sitting kind of close there, bud.

Allison, I love you. Call him out, girl.

“Do you know what it’s like to be the best player on the team?” I mean, she was Nationally ranked as a kid, I think she probably has a good idea about pressure, Jackson, and yet she somehow still manages to not be an asshole.

What’s that quote? When you’re accustomed to privilege, losing it feels like oppression? IT’S NOT.

This is even worse because he’s in a team sport, tbh. Like, this is just showcasing how fucking selfish he is. If he cared at all about the sport or the team he’d be over the moon (no pun intended) about having Scott on the team.

See? Allison and I are of the same mind on this. And no, he wasn’t joking.

He’s bad and also being creepy now. Run, girl.

Poor Allison is having a hard day. Lydia being dismissive, Jackson being creepy, Scott avoiding her.

Scott, seriously, use your words. Tell her that you’re grounded or something. Tell her that your grades are in free fall and you can’t date until they’re sorted. You have options other than just ignoring her.  Even though I don’t think you have to because your assumptions are wrong.

The writers did it again! This time it wasn’t with Stiles, but they had Scott ask a ‘dumb’ question just so someone could be sarcastic back! Such a weird character choice.

Man, this is so mean! Are there any good teachers in this show?

AWWWWWWWW. I mean, absolutely horrible way to show it, but that’s sweet! I knew Allison wasn’t a weakness. Both cause Fuckface is full of shit, but also because this is not the first time he’s calmed down because of her.

Stiles how are you the dumbest smart person? You’re still not forgiven for beating Scott up, though.

Once again, PAIN IS NOT THE SAME AS ANGER AND YOU NEED TO STOP BEATING YOUR FRIEND UP. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? STILES YOU ARE NOT FORGIVEN EVEN A LITTLE.

This actor is not doing well with this scene. Like, he does anger fine, and he did the scene with Kate fine, but I pretty sure this is supposed to be tugging at my heartstrings and all I can think is, like, did you even visit this guy once in six years? Or did you come back now just to show him off to Scott as a physical reminder of your pain, and then yell at him when it’s clear that you’re useless?

Still haven’t ruled that guy out as the Alpha. Don’t know why he killed Laura, but maybe he’s pissed at her for deserting him too.

He didn’t even park in a spot? I mean, just one more asshole behavior, but still. That’s a place where disabled people may need one of those spots you blocked, Fuckface.

Oh. Oh, this is even worse. Stiles did those things to punish Scott for something he had no control over or any responsibility for.

Scott needed to be physically punished TWICE for Stiles to feel better. That’s just…like I don’t want to throw around the word abusive, but this is not a good look at all. Are we supposed to give Stiles a pass because he’s loyal? Because obviously he’s loyal only up until the point where he blames you for something.

I reject that Scott has to do something. Scott is not in charge of protecting the Sheriff or the school or the town. With great power comes great responsibility does not mean all the bad things that happen are his fault. You can’t put that weight on anyone let alone a kid. He’s responsible for helping where he can, just like everyone else, not whenever it’s needed.

Does that teacher know something too?

I still like the Vet. He’s so nice to Scott.

He was better at lying to the Sheriff, but he still wasn’t great at that.

Welp, Fuckface has reached another level of terrible. There could have been a half dozen reasons his heart rate increased, but this guy’s first instinct is always cruelty and violence.

The Vet trying to protect Scott and Scott trying to protect his boss is lovely. I really do like their relationship and I wish we could see more of it. Obviously the Chemistry teacher didn’t know what he was talking about because Scott has a good male role model in the Vet.

The spiral just means revenge? Like, bro, why wouldn’t you just say that to Scott in the first place? YOU MAKE NO SENSE. NONE OF YOUR CHOICES MAKE SENSE.

“Hit him again and you’ll see me get angry.”

Wooooboooooooy, you tell him Scott!

Also, the Vet was clearly knocked out once already and his face didn’t heal and Fuckface is beyond stupid.

Fuckface asking Scott for a plan. Like, I can’t begin to imagine asking a sixteen year old to plan something for me.

“Personally I’m a fan of ignoring a problem until it goes away,” says the guy who got his friend beat up twice because he thinks that just because Scott has these abilities (that he can barely control) he should have protected the Sheriff.

This plan is sounding more like a Stiles plan, Scott. Initial idea with zero idea on follow through.

Dude, Scott got him some base.

Oh, yay, we’re done with Fuckface. Love that for us.

I’m glad the Vet got out of there, but..uh. Boys? We got us a problem.

#teen wolf #scott mccall #allison argent #episode reaction #1x06 #derek hale #jackson whittemore #stiles stilinski #alan deaton

[sugar-petals]

:: Two Girls Dominating SuperM

↳ NOTE: Since sharin’ is carin’ 😋 Happy holidays! Get the list Santa cuz here go seven kinds of naughty. PS: I use different POVs here, whatever fits best.

words. 3.3k

warnings ⚠️ bondage, pegging, flexibility kink, sex toys, some switch!kai, rough sex, harnesses, oral (m giving), possessiveness, taemin’s evil lady kink, ice cream

⎡Taeyong⎦⇁ I think it’s time to reveal an unspoken truth about the pop industry. You ready? When Rihanna did S&M, a vision of Taeyong from the future whispered the lyrics in her ear. I swear to god. That’s exactly how it happened. Just the way we’d expect, dear Taeyong is gonna float in paradise. Not one domme ready to shake him up, but two? He can retire. Boy doesn’t need anything else. Except maybe a bit of cash to buy harnesses he can model but they’ll treat him to that anyway. That being said. Knowing that two fly madams in latex are ravaging his body at every chance they can get is gonna make him know he can die happy one day. Like, he truly lived. He won’t really hold back with restructuring a lot of parts of his life to let this dynamic unfold all the way. We’ve heard of his DIY skills. This sounds funny but Taeyong will design, paint, decorate, and maintain a special area for their play. Not necessarily just one room, he varies that. We know how gifted he is with interiors and domestic ideas, so. Prepare to get blown away by his sheer efforts. And man, the amount of spare time he can stretch to get a quickie out of that time window. Incredible. Even more interesting is gonna be the range. Taeyong can handle girls that dress up super differently every time, he goes along with any roleplay or character they come up with. He’s gonna be their little prince, their hotel boy, their waiter, their flight attendant, their Jack Dawson incarnate. And their dream boy altogether, cuz that’s what Taeyong is.

His frustrations are bound to work up over weeks if he is busy at SM, so finally seeing them again will have him so excited. And nervous. And so involved with preparing things for them, the perfectionist comes out. Can you imagine Taeyong donning his apron and preparing a four course menu for an entire afternoon? You bet he’ll pull that off. Butler Taeyong will be at full throttle. He’s gonna end up getting viciously fucked in the kitchen anyways. Like to the point where all his hair is a mess in his face and everyone ran out of breath. And seriously, he’s the type to completely surrender and place all trust in the girls. Which they know, and they’ll reward him so well. With things Taeyong loves best aka getting whipped and plowed. One of you could be binding him to a fucking machine and controlling the remote, the other marking his legs and upper back. The little bun gets terribly turned on if you push him on all fours for that and hold the nape of his neck in place so he can’t go anywhere. Consider your carpet ruined with semen. While Taeyong is busy recharging for the next round lying on the floor exhausted, you take polaroids.

⎡Baekhyun⎦⇁ Okay listen, I’ll tell you the secret. You can pull a complete duality on him. Baekhyun, getting nuzzled and snuggled and squeezed from all sides because he’s so sweet? Absolutely his jam. He got two hands to hold, after all. And two mochi cheeks to kiss, my friend, two of them. But also, getting a full dose of freaky stuff inflicted on him with some good music playing? This loud little fucker is going to levitate. These two raging girls can take complete control of his body and fool around to their liking. Grabbing his butt, feeding him cake, dressing him up or stripping him down, riding his face to oblivion. Like not just circling your hips. Actual sharp thrusting and making him forget the light of day. And using some cute pink ropes to string his pretty wrists from the ceiling as a treat. Only a matter of time until he’s an arching mess. As you already suspected: A giant dose of ass destruction is only one step away. Any toy suffices. At best, when he’s trying to beat a new high score and has to concentrate on the game. Nice challenge for his focus, he likes that. He wants to feel how he’s getting stretched out from all directions until it hurts so good. Screaming „Ah!“ is his favorite word. Maybe not too straps in one hole, that’s Taeyong territory, and Baekhyun’s ass is really tight generally, but spitroasting? His favorite pastime. Stuffed up and getting a load of extra hard thrusts. He can suck and gyrate all the way, all at the same time like he never did anything else. It’s gotta be hard and fast. I’m telling you, he’ll make it sloppy anyway.

Did he ever think he could get fucked up like this by a sexy tag team? Nope, he squarely thought he was undeserving. Now that he’s getting regularly suffocated and earns the praise for being so cute, Baekhyun is actually starting to believe he can ask for and enjoy that glorious wreckage. Because if there’s one thing he wishes for, it’s drowning in his own spit. These two are gonna be so territorial and wild, his dick and tongue are gonna threaten to fall off every night. How many condoms Baekhyun’s gonna fill, those will be record numbers, it’s like the album charts. Baekhyun’s a straight-up cum bank dairy cow extraordinaire when it comes to milking him dry. Like what did you think if two mommies feed him with all sorts of delicacies, all that juice is going to stock up and get ready to blow. And the amounts and types of collars Baekhyun’s neck is gonna be in: Whole lot, even with leashes attached. Oh god, they’ll strap him stupid with some dog ears on as a reward. Baekhyun’s prostate is gonna be a constantly spongy ruined mess, poor mochi gonna end up waddling around the kitchen to chug a liter of water at 3 AM.

⎡Taemin⎦⇁ You know who’s gonna be in his element. You just know it. Taemin is ride or die when it comes to wanting someone to be the boss of him. He’s not just dabbling in all that jazz to experiment, he’s livin’ and breathing it. Taemin’s imagination is the 3D version of AO3’s finest fanfics. Hell, he even imagines the sounds over and over, it’s gotta be 4D! He’s already crafted the most intricate fantasies for some seriously action movie-like roleplay. But let's start from the beginning. What’s on Taemin’s ever-wicked mind when he goes to sleep at night? Two intimidating ladies ganging up on him. Arriving on their black motorcycle at his house, flirting the living hell out of him, raiding his fridge, grinding on his lap in their biker gear, licking his face, taking his luxurious clothes off, calling him names, making him dance for him (that one’s a staple), biting down on his torso wherever they please, and having their way with him until it’s all one big orgy. Hell, probably on that motorcycle in the garage. Taemin pretty much getting one dry orgasm after the other because it’s the time of his life. Like, they’re really spoiling him. And he’s giving himself to them. That kind of scenario going down? To Taemin, that sounds like his wettest of dreams come true. He’s like yes, yes, yes and yes. A dynamic duo of sadistic girlfriends, that’s gonna leave him so shook and utterly addicted. Like he wants to get backed into a corner, bring on all the kabedon, Taemin goes all the way the way we know him. Nobody loves that fantasy more than him.

Now… the trick is. They’re actually really fun and sweet and pet his hair incessantly. You know, casually, doing daily life things. Cooing at him and getting all the sweetest princely kisses from their angel. My god, they’ll be so gently in love with him. But in the bedroom, it’s raw business. Taemin is gonna take is so hard, he’ll be seeing stars. That he’s getting slapped around — the thighs included, he loves that — while getting a handjob has to be the most orgasmic experience ever. Taemin is gonna bust fifty-thousand nuts over having his hair pulled by one girl and being choked by the other. Boy is he gonna be hard even if the pants stay on. What if he’s not the one grinding around this time. Two scary girls riding his lap, cuffing and belittling him — wow. Taemin never wants that feast to end. Getting roughed up at any occasion makes his day. He is needy, but the girls have all the cruel shit could ever ask for, and he has the stamina to handle all of it. And the class, he never loses his mystery. A fucking marathon with some pretty brutal bondage and impact play involved, no problem, he’ll last it. You can torture the soul out of him, he’s gonna be winding and gasping for more. Except maybe that his voice is gonna be pretty hoarse if they don’t gag his mouth for the most part. Man, Taemin is so vocal. This will have the ladies all runny beyond imagination. Nobody who meets him casually is gonna suspect it, but Taemin has the wettest dick in all of Seoul (unless Lucas is doing an allnighter) and no pliable brain left because he’s got is fucked out hard daily and he gave it daily. Now you know.

⎡Jongin⎦⇁ Kai is gonna act smug about this right from the start. He’s gonna be the guy who’s proud to show you off, walking around arms over your either shoulders, him right in the middle. Like hello, I’m experienced. The entirety of SM Entertainment is gonna have rumors circulating but nobody’s gonna be surprised. Little does he know you’re down to make his naughty lyrics come true. Kai is gonna get pegged and punished holding onto his dear oversized teddy bear. Literally, these two will have him burying his entire face there. Whimpering and high-pitched moaning like it’s time for EXO adlibs. His couch is large enough for three people, so. Somebody is gonna end up horny and crying. With his album on repeat because there’s no better music to fuck to, don’t kid yourself, you likely don’t, anyway. It’s Kai we’re talking about. He has sluttiness for days. Getting your hands on all that tall dark and handsome goodness is just all that you need as a domme duo. Have you seen how this guy moves just breathing and walking and cocking his head on the occasion… I don’t wanna know how far he can go in the horizontal realm to put it carefully.

But you gotta be ready for Kai’s aggressive side that wants to make things happen. If you like a struggle for dominance, this is the address. You two are just too tempting and delicious not to move around on his bed to assume new positions. And if Jongin doesn’t feel like snapping his dangerous hips into either of you, he’s lying. Kai is ready to fucking dick you down like it’s your birthday. He has to be taught to request and wait like a good boy, on his best behavior and his knees preferably. Yep, I think that Kai is a case for some extended training because he’s so impatient, with good reason, but he still needs to be put in his place. Which Kai likes because it means you go harder on him without restraint. Was it his goal all along? I can see one of the girls taking the role of speaking to him with his head in her lap. Giving commands occasionally, checking in. And the other, getting freaky on him with her instruments. Kai’s body is so sensitive and reactive, it’s gonna be fun to see him twitch and beg. Even something as simple as clamping his nipples will already do the trick. That’s when you have Kai begging.

⎡Ten⎦⇁ Believe it or not. Out of all people, he’s gonna be the one with the most doubts and insecurities — at first. It feels a little overwhelming to Ten because he doesn’t know what’s coming. You know that kind of facial expression he does when he is uncertain. Mind you: Having a whole bunch of people around him isn’t new to him. Bitch, he’s in NCT! A threesome is peanuts against that neo energy. It’s more like, the coordination, he doesn’t know how to act. He’ll be shy and big-eyed and doesn’t know what to say. The king of comebacks and clapbacks: Speechless. Let that sink in. The girls are dealing with the kind of guy who needs a lot of clarity and talk beforehand because he doesn’t have experience with it. It takes him to really know what the program is and damn he’s right about that. Ten really getting into what he’s signing up for is big-brained of him. He asks a lot of questions with an open-mind, but also care. But then again, we know how Ten’s confidence can skyrocket, and that he’s so secretly curious about those things he’s bursting with anticipation. And he knows what to ask for to really get someone going. Touch me, tease me, feel me up, am I right or am I right? He adapts so well to almost any circumstance in his life, it’s admirable. Totally up to the challenge once it goes down, he really grows into that. And I promise that particularly the physical part is absolutely his forte, that’s where he blooms. Ten can be easily taught through the genius of his body and he’s gonna love that.

Once things get hands-on and he finds himself with two girls mounting him, and on go the cat ears, he’s like oh my god this is great. The surprise factor is the biggest in the group here. Ten is gonna almost facepalm because he’s been worrying himself where there was nothing to be anxious about. Because he’s in his groove! Smiling and laughing and having a good time. No stress, just feeling so damn good. Probably with several super-size vibrating toys employed on him because that’s how Ten rolls, always taking the challenge. What a twitchy mess he’s gonna be, I can’t. The two ladies are gonna have a blast themselves bending him around and getting the best of the best erections out of him. Ten is totally gonna snack something while they’re fooling around as three. Or they’re stuffing him with delicacies, he’s gonna be so eager. But that’s not even a glimpse of what they’re gonna do! Ten is ready for almost everything, my friends. Tag teamed while dressed up as Alice? Likelier than you think. With the wig, that’s right. Ten is gonna be their good girl for one long night and truly love it. He obeys so well, spreads his legs like its nothing. It’s all gonna be a hell of a mess on his outfit though. If there’s one person ready to have cum all over him, that’s the right address. He’s throwing peace signs and pose for their phone cameras. Oh Ten, the legend you are.

⎡Lucas⎦⇁ Wong Yukhei… the entire concept that is him literally screams for it. Two people handling all that fucking hunk. So much space to work with, that body is a drug. Xuxi is one staggering big boy, his forehead is making love to any door frame. Lot of waist to grab (…like why is it shaped like that. Offensive!) lot of wrist to tie. And those long fucking model legs, for god’s sake, you just gotta do something with those for once. Get those thigh harnesses! Plus he’s a literal baby who’s all down to date girls his senior. Yukhei is a sucker for mad girls acting possessive over him. And he’s a handful, one fucking tease, one chaotic man. Two times the payback is just so much more appropriate. He can just get fucked and fucked and fucked some more. As is two times as much stimulation. You can imagine. Yes, all over his body. Grabbing his necktie and guiding him around this that (good shit) and caressing his face, and his back, and his chest, and his stomach, it’s so sexy to touch him there.

But let’s not lie. A certain somebody has cock and balls for two people. Lucas is one hell of a stallion. Lot of girth to make hard and to edge. That needs a duo of two unhinged girls, forces of nature, someone shy won’t do. It’s their job to make him shy and docile, not the other way around. Because Lucas enjoys being teased and flattered right back, and is more than fine with being toyed with, even playfully beaten up. You know he loves to be on the receiving end of bickering. Doesn’t mean he suddenly forgets to be an active party or just leans back. He has giant hands and knows how to use them, he’s chartered some major clit territory as well, remember that. That’s gonna be three people losing their fucking minds. Imagine all those luscious, raspy groans. Lucas never holds back, no filter, he knows what the ladies like. Drenched in sweat is all you’ll gonna be. And probably a whole bunch of lube because that’s the other thing the entire concept of Lucas is screaming for. The more ye know.

⎡Mark⎦⇁ Alright my friends. Cute Mark vibes different but that’s no secret. Boy’s gonna admit he’s really intimidated and shy, but so happy he’s gonna get sandwiched once he agrees to try it. It’s all a matter of courage. The girls will be the ones approaching him because they bought him ice cream, and the conversation starts from there, but it’s up to Mark to really set the mood. Oh boy, he’s not gonna stop blushing. This nerd with a girl on each side, that sure as hell looks great on him, I assure you. And if Mark Lee is your trophy rapper poly boyfriend, you truly made it, so. This is gonna be a dynamic right here. And the most fun, imagine the mayhem. He’ll talk his mouth off like his life depends on it. Mark doing sexy talk with two girls at the same time would be so entertaining. They will own his ass. Like wow… they’re making out with him, alternate with french kisses and putting their hands all over him, and ruin his face with ice cream. Mark would be so sexy to pull close by his collar.

And you bet it’s gonna slowly escalate from there, he’s tapping into some sides of him he never knew were there. Ice cubes down his chest, tongues down his mouth, hands in his hair kind of afternoon. As a brief and hilarious interruption, a shivering, horny as hell Mark takes a phone call from Johnny. Who, as you learn, is completely unsuspecting. „Hey, I’m at IKEA, uh. The living room section, actually. Should I buy the blue pillow or the yellow one? I can’t decide. They both have the same print on them, so.“ Mark is gonna blurt out that blue is probably gonna be a good idea and ends the phone call before anybody can moan into the speaker. Johnny is left confused at the other end of the line. The girls will end up teasing Mark that he said blue because that’s what his balls are for sure. Freudian slips, always glorious. Mark is not gonna deny that and ultimately ends up with his face between two cleavages — talk about melons, are we gonna kid ourselves — and two hands down his jeans. This is gonna need a lot of towels. Mark has never gotten this fucked up in his whole life and he is grateful. Watch out people, he’ll write a whole mixtape about this.

#superm #super m #super m smut #super m x reader #super m scenario #super m imagine #super m x dom!reader #poly!super m #baekhyun smut #taemin smut #taeyong smut #mark lee smut #ten smut #kai smut #yukhei smut

[derekmorganscrocs]

Last Summer: Ace x Reader (OneShot)

Here’s an adorable Ace gif for you because I love him.

Word Count: 2, 064

Summary: You and Ace are best friends but it turns into something more.

Quick Note: This is the first thing I’ve written that I’ve fully finished and am posting so I’m like freakin our right now. Also this isn’t my usual style but I’m super happy with how it turned out and I hope you (anyone who reads this) likes it! I’m considering a series but I also have several other things in the works, so it might not be soon. Anyways, let’s get this show on the road!

Ace and Y/n. Best friends since they could walk. Inseparable through elementary, middle, and high school. Where do we start?

To be honest, there’s not a lot to explain. You and Ace kind of just... were. It made sense. Best friends, always had the other’s back. You both work at the Claw, you’re both a little burnt out and worn down, but still clever and funny. Everything always made sense.

You always joke, laugh, and do stupid shit together. You’ve bailed him out of trouble more times than you can count. He’s done the same for you. He’s your favourite person, you’re his.

And you’ve been in love with each other forever. Except neither one of you can tell that the other loves you back. So we’re at a roadblock.

You got weird when Ace dated Laura back in the day.

Ace got weird when you dated James, the biker dude in high school.

You got weird when Ace started crushing on Bess.

Ace got weird when you mentioned that Ryan Hudson was hot in a douchebag kind of way.

Summer was different though. Had you known it’d be your last summer before you spotted Dead Lucy, saw Tiffany Hudson’s ghost, were introduced to the spirit world, and started doing seances and rituals every other day, you may have appreciated it more. But oh well, right?

Not right. The start of summer was when you started realizing you couldn’t go on the way you were, but that you also couldn’t live without Ace. So how do you confess? You don’t.

A couple weeks go by before you start to notice the way Ace looks at you, how he always stands just a little closer than anyone else does. How he puts himself between you and the guys that ogle you as the two of you walk to the pier. The way his jaw clenches when someone cute hits on you. His hand always right beside yours, and you wonder if he gets the urge to grab your hand like you do his.

And by the end of June, you’re this weird something. Not just friends, you’ve both seen the way the other stares. But it’s unspoken. You don’t know if you can bring yourself to tell him. He doesn’t know if he can bear the risk of losing you.

Don’t get it twisted, despite the buried feelings you and Ace are the best pair of best friends anyone in Horseshoe Bay has ever seen. Constantly laughing and cracking jokes, seeing who can get more tips in a day. Ace is always the one you turn to, you’re the one Ace turns to. For pretty much anything.

When July rolls around, you both get more time off. The fourth comes quickly, and you make plans to watch the fireworks from the roof of the claw. Upon climbing up at sunset, you decide to just hang out for a few hours until it’s actually time for the fireworks. You talk and joke, and you and Ace carve your initials into one of the shingles. Laying against the shingles, he only carves an A, and you ask if you’ll ever find out what his last name is.

“Maybe when you take it.”

Those are the five words that change everything. He looks up from his knife, startled at his own words. You’re frozen in place as the sky finally reaches its full darkness. And the first boom grabs your attention. You look over in the direction of the beach, and see red sparkles in the sky. Turning back, Ace is sitting up now, both of you still shell-shocked at his joke. Was it a joke?

His knife is long gone, tucked safely in his pocket, and he grabs your face and kisses you. You kiss him back, obviously. He kisses you passionately, slowly but strongly, and fireworks erupt. Both metaphorically and literally. You both end up laying side by side on the roof, kissing and watching the fireworks. It’s the best night ever.

But it’s never made official. There’s still no blurted out confessions, and it never happens again. His eyes still dart to your lips when you speak to him, you still imagine his arms around your waist, and you both still stare longingly at the other whenever their back is turned.

Until August rolls around, a month filled with storms and fog. And death. Ryan Hudson and his goons pull up for dinner. You and Ace serve them when all the others bail, make jokes about insufferable rich people and stare at each other’s mouths, both trying to not get caught as you wish you could just have what you want.

Then the lights go out. Screaming outside from Nancy, and Tiffany Hudson is dead. You and Ace are pretty much free to go, alibis confirmed. The next day Nancy comes to you with evidence that Tiffany Hudson was killed by Lucy Sable. Dead Lucy. Oh god.

The case unfolds and you’re wrapped up in a supernatural mystery. All the while trying to figure out your very natural mystery. What the hell is going on between you and Ace? It’s normal but not, and you don’t want to lose him, but you can feel the drift starting. It’s so uncertain. For once in your life, nothing makes sense.

You cover well though. Burying your feelings is a lot easier than it should be, and you and Ace still joke and pull stupid shit all the time. George and Bess are tired of being caught in the crossfire of your pranks, Nancy would be, but the only time she’s actually noticed anything is when you shot her with a nerf gun because Ace dodged. Nick, the guy from the garage, makes his way into your crew, and takes immense amusement from you and Ace. It’s fine. Great, even.

Then in September, after Tiffany Hudson’s funeral, you go to the Claw to talk to Ace. But he’s beyond talking. He’s got his tongue in Laura Tandy’s throat. And you knew she was back in town, hell, that’s what pushed you to finally talk to Ace. Only you’re too late. You’ve wasted the summer, your summer, being afraid of losing him. Just to lose him anyways.

So you spend a miserable month pretending you’re fine and fake gagging every time him and Laura have their backs turned on you. You bitch to Bess, who’s all too keen on the drama. Nancy’s so wrapped up in the paranormal and her own love life that she’s barely bothered to notice that you’re drowning. George on the other hand... she’s supportive. Well as supportive as George can be. Mostly threatening Laura and saying she’ll fire Ace if you want her to. But you can’t do that. He may only be a dishwasher at the Claw, but he loves it. He loves being part of the team.

And then you walk in on Laura asking Ace to go to Paris with her. You nearly lose it, but manage to keep it together, hiding around the corner with a hand clamped over your mouth as tears threaten to finally spill free. When they’re out of sight, you call Bess, then George, then Nancy, all to no avail. And so you’re hyperventilating and alone, sitting on the front porch of the Claw when Nick swoops in to save you.

Of course it was Nick. The only one who doesn’t know about the whole mess with Ace. So he makes you explain and watches in horror as you refuse to let tears fall and successfully convince yourself to just not be sad. Over the next few days he turns into a brotherly figure, managing to help you realize that feelings are okay to have.

So the garage is your new hangout, and you don’t realize that Ace is actually missing you. Because the only one he wants to ask about going to France was you. Nick sends you back to work on the fourth day, you don’t want to go but he forces you. He says ‘mixing shitty Caesars is the best remedy for any amount of pain.’ It’s the first time he’d seen you laugh in a while. Actually, the first time you’d laughed in a while.

The first person you see when you walk in the diner, of course, was Ace. Sitting at the bar, staring into the wall’s soul. You manage a quiet ‘hey’, and when he turns to see you looking mostly back to normal, he nearly tackles you into a hug. He manages to restrain himself though, not sure what to do. You two never fight. Is this even a fight? How do you make up from a not-fight-fight? Instead he asks you to sit with him. You do, reluctantly, but only because he insists and you can never say no to him.

“Say the word and I’ll stay. Say you want me here and I won’t go.”

And there he goes, changing everything again. You freeze, just like on the Fourth of July, and stare at him in shock. This time though, he isn’t surprised, it’s just you who’s shell-shocked. It takes you a while to understand that he is actually saying what he’s saying, and you kind of just stare at him for a minute. Then you make your decision.

“I can’t tell you what to do. You need to make this call on your own.”

And then, you mix Caesars. And more Caesars, and more Caesars. The restaurant could be supplied for a week if it weren’t a festival day. You would’ve kept going, but what’s left in the bottom of the vodka bottle looked pretty delicious, so you down it instead. Still mostly sober, but tipsy enough to manage a smile, you patted George on the back and said goodbye before heading to the garage.

Nick makes you crash on his couch in the loft, and after a power nap and a glass of water you’re back to completely sober. Good as new. The only thing that’s missing is... your phone. You left it at the Claw earlier. Which means you have to go back. And probably see Ace again.

So back you go. You get the phone without running into anyone, but pause at the sound of voices in the dining area. Frozen in the kitchen, you watch as Ace tells Laura he’s staying. That he has a ‘purpose here. And a person.’ She tells him to miss her, which gives you mixed vibes, and leaves.

“Ace?”

“Jesus! Oh, Y/n! You’re-you’re here. Oh that’s great, you saw that. How much did you hear?”

“That you have a purpose here. And a person.”

A smile finally appears on your lips, and he reciprocates. You walk into the dining room, toward Ace. He watches your every move intently, as if he’s entranced with you. He is, because he hasn’t seen you smile since Laura came to town. And even though he’s been playing it happy, he’s been miserable. He loves Laura, he really does, but it’s more of the ‘maybe in another world’ kind of relationship.

You and Ace. That’s the ‘perfectly perfect, made for each other, soulmates, in any world’ type of relationship. Best friends to something more, with ups and down. Real. Not some whisk you off to Paris and live in a movie. Horseshoe Bay’s ugly, scary, haunted, real life.

Sitting on a barstool, back to the kitchen, you lean against the bar and look at Ace. You think about what to say. There’s so many things you could do. That you want to do.

Slap him.

Kiss him.

Throw him off the roof.

Hug him until he has to peel you off of him.

Throw a bottle at his head.

Jump into his arms, wrap your legs around his waist and stay there forever.

Stick Lucy on him to suck out his soul.

Kiss him until you run out of air.

Maybe you’ll say something instead. There’s lots of things you could say, but you’re not sure how many of them are true.

Did he really betray you by seeing Laura?

Are you grateful for this because you met Nick and gained a brother?

What would’ve happened if Laura never showed?

Are we still us?

Instead, you decide to go with something you know is the truth.

“I’m your person.”

And he smiles like he’s won the lottery.

Tags: @vexfulfun

#ace x reader #ace nancy drew #nancy drew cw #nancy drew #nancy drew fic #ace nancy drew x reader

[troped-fanfic-challenge]

JATP ROUND THREE FICS!

We received fourteen (14!!!!) fics for Round Three of the JATP Event! These fics are full of that sweet, sweet canonverse goodness that we can’t get enough of, but with our signature TROPED twist! We loved to see you all challenge yourselves with the theme, tropes, and pairings!

Please try to read as many fics as you can! Take some notes, leave some kudos/comments for the authors, and help us vote on the winners!

Voting will be open until May 29th at 11:59pm EST! Vote here:

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/BZ3W5FT

———

Just say you won't let go (Rated G) [Julie/Luke]

Summary: Hey, Julie

You're the heart and soul 'round here, it's plain to see

in which Julie has a second chance with her boys, and then another

we will fight to shine together (bright forever) (Rated G) [Bright Lighting Guy/Rob from the Orpheum]

Summary: “Hey,” Chris says, walking up to the boy. “What are you doing?”

“Oh,” he puts the dandelions down and stands up. “Hi. I’m trying to make a flower crown, but I don’t remember how.”

“Cool. I’m Chris, I live--” he points to his house. “Over there.”

The boy gives him a lopsided smile. “I’m Rob. I’m staying with my grandparents for the summer.”

~

or: the rob/bright lighting guy fic literally nobody asked for but i wrote anyways. enjoy gays, bring ur tissues

what happened when (Rated G) [Alex/Luke]

Summary: Before Julie and the Phantoms, before the guys became ghosts, before Sunset Curve -- they were Luke and Alex. Not 5 feet apart cause they're totally gay.

who cares if one more light goes out? (in a sky of a million stars) (Rated T) [Ray/Rose]

Summary: Rose moves in across the street when he’s eight and she is seven. Their parents push for them to play together, because that’s what parents do. They’re not wrong about it though. The two of them get on like a house on fire and some of his happiest memories from his childhood are just him and Rose, sitting in the large oak tree behind their houses. Hidden up in the branches, between the millions of dark green leaves, they played together.

or: The first and the last time Ray ever kissed Rose.

we can forget the world (just you and me) (Rated T) [Alex/Willie]

Summary: “This was the first place I ever came out to someone,” Alex says, spinning around and taking in the tree house.

together we can take on the world (Rated G) [Alex/Reggie]

Summary: Alex Mercer meets Reggie Peters on October 8, 1983, which means that two days have passed since Reggie's sixth birthday, because Reggie is a Libra according to the magazines that his mom reads when she gets Reggie to paint her toenails. He’s also just moved to Los Angeles, California from his hometown of Gatlinburg, Tennessee, a small town in the mountains, and he’s told Alex Mercer about all of this in the three minutes that they’ve known each other, and he might be the loudest, most obnoxious boy that Alex has ever met, and he absolutely has to be Alex’s new best friend.

The Peters family moves in down the street from the Mercers in 1983, and so begins the rest of their lives.

Long Live (Can I start another life with you?) (Rated T) [Julie/Luke]

Summary: It's all too much for one day: first a muffin, then more heartbeats. Julie just needs some time to think. If Luke runs after her to sit by her side so she doesn't lose it, she won't complain.

Except afterwards, he starts acting weird. Very weird. And months later, she's tired of letting him keep his distance.

She can’t do this. Not right now. Not today.

She jumps back on her feet.

The excited grin falls from Luke’s face. She doesn’t try to catch it.

“I – I think this is too much. I need some time. Alone. Sorry.”

Then she runs. She runs past the calloused fingers reaching out to her. Past Reggie and the door, past carved pumpkins on porches and Cornelia Street.

She just runs.

Roses (Rated G) [Emily & Luke, Alex/Luke]

Summary: It becomes a sacred place she shares with her son. Mitch is usually off at work from dawn until six o’clock, but Emily’s working from home for now. She works as a florist’s shop right outside the neighborhood. So she brings home seeds and little flowers and other cuts from the store; she and Luke will spend hours out in the dirt, planting seeds and making mud pies and Luke will babble about whatever happened in daycare and make up stories about the different flowers.

Somewhere Only We Know (Rated T) [Nick/Carrie]

Summary: Nick Danforth-Evans met Julie Molina when he was six years old. He had no idea how much an impact that afternoon would have on his life.

___

A journey through Nick Danforth-Evan's life as experienced in the safety of his backyard hide away.

The Itty Bitty Details (Rated T) [Alex/Willie]

Summary: “Did I forget to mention William, I also get your soul,”

Willie could feel a stinging feeling and a purple stamp appeared on his hand. When the stamp appeared he could no longer remember who Alex was. The name meant nothing to Willie now.

Or 5 times Willie knew Alex and one where Alex knew Willie

you're the only one who makes me (my wildflower) (Rated T) [Bobby/Reggie]

Summary: The tree was Reggie's safe space, and Bobby was his safe person. He could escape all his troubles there, except for one nagging thought - did he have feelings for his best friend?

Dying complicated things.

because i've known you so long, i know every cadence and what they mean (Rated G) [Alex & Julie, Julie/Luke]

Summary: Alex and Julie have always lived right next to each other. Through highs and lows, they grow up together. Also, 5 times Luke kisses Julie and it doesn't count plus 1 time Julie kisses Luke and it does count.

Alternatively, the Juke 5+1 fic from Alex's POV. Strap in, folks.

Someday (I'll See You Again) (Rated T) [Alex/Willie]

Summary: They’re wrong. Alex, you are not a failure. You’re incredible. You’re smart. You’re funny, and the best friend I could ask for. You’re a wicked talented drummer and you have a beautiful voice. And more important than all of that, is that you’re you, Alex. And the you you are is wonderful, and lovable and perfect. If your parents can’t see that, that’s their own fault. But I swear, Alex. If you’re afraid of them, I need you to tell me. You have to be safe.” Willie’s voice had gone desperate by the end. Alex deserved to know how freaking amazing he was and the fact that his parents didn’t bother to tell him, and actively worked to tear him down instead, was infuriating.

But Willie also worried about him. He’d worried about Alex since the first time he heard Mr. Mercer shouting through the window, a worry that never really went away. Not with the way Alex automatically straightened up when his parents were mentioned, as if he could hear his dad lecturing him about appearances from miles away. Not with the way Alex looked when he was with them, perfectly pieced together and falling apart at the seams, eyes distant and shoulders tense. Willie was pretty sure he had worrying about Alex etched in his bones by this point.

The Energy Never Dies (Rated T) [Gen Fic]

Summary: Well, I ain't always right, but I've never been wrong

Seldom turns out the way it does in a song

Once in a while, you get shown the light

In the strangest of places if you look at it right

--- Scarlet Begonias, Grateful Dead

Four moments across time in the loft of the Molina's garage.

#troped: jatp #round 3: canonverse #jatp fanfiction #round 3 submissions #round 3 voting #troped: voting

[sunset-curve-fantom]

You could do one where the reader is a mean and scary girl who scares everyone and she is friends with the boys and likes Reggie. Until one day the boys go through her things and discover that she likes someone, but does not say who. They repent anyway because the reader finds out and gets angry making the boys afraid of her. Reggie, with a bit of courage, asks the reader who she likes and she confesses that she likes him and Reggie confesses back?

Warnings: None

A/N: I HOPE YOU ENJOY, I HOPE I DID THIS JUSTICE FOR YOU.

You had always been the girl everyone was terrified of, everywhere you went something terrible happened. Eventually, your friends began dropping out of your life, afraid of something happening to them for being in the same room as you.

So, you ended up being the freak, the person everyone was terrified of. You had lost so many people in your life; it seems everyone else was trying to avoid getting hurt as well. So, they just walked away when you needed people the most. 

The only person who had enough courage to approach you was Julie Molina, bless her whole heart. She just lost her mom and she was going to confront the most mean and scary girl in her school.

“Excuse me?”

You turned around, hair swinging over your shoulder as you looked her up and down. Too busy to even care about her standing there. You turned back to your friends, “Excuse me” You heard again, but slightly more forceful.

“What” The anger was dripping from your words, everyone was terrified of you. Why wasn’t this girl? She just didn’t know when to walk away from a dangerous situation, meaning you.

“I just- can we have a moment skank’s?” She said, looking at your group of friends. This only make you laugh as you nodded at them.

“Well isn’t little Molina confident today, how can I help you?” She cowered back a little, almost afraid if she got too close something was going to happen. You had never actually hurt anyone, but lots of people close to you had died. Sets a bad precedent, I guess.

“Uh yeah- uh-uh-uh…”

“Spit it out, Molina” At this rate, she wasn’t going to tell you what she needed till Christmas.

“Uh- I was just thinking… I know you don’t have many close friends. And I know you lost your mom- so I was wondering if you wanted to come over after school? Just for a bit?” Julie said, almost scared of your reaction. No one has ever wanted to be your friend; let alone this girl you barely knew.

Your expression softened; it was not something you ever expected from her. She was the epitome of happiness and light, while you were so dark and full of sadness. It was an odd mix.

“Can I think about it? If that’s okay, Julie…” You said in a low voice, she nodded. Handing you a piece of paper with her phone number on it. To just let her know before the day was over.

This idea of a new friend, it brightened the anger you held in your soul. The mean and scary just became a way of deflecting the pain and suffering. It made you stronger and that was what was important, especially after such loss.

By third period, you had come to one conclusion. You were going to try your hardest to be friends with Julie Molina… and that was the first goal you had in many years.

You met Julie at the end of the day, walking back to her house. Deciding to spend your afternoon in the garage, you were surprised by the three boys sitting on the couch and chatting.

“Uh hi- I didn’t know you invited others?” You said, confusion clearly coating your features. While Julie was just stunned, clearly startled that you saw them.

“You can see them?”

You blinked rapidly and they were still there, “Uh yeah? Am I supposed to pretend they don’t exist or something?” You just chuckled under your breath, you found yourself quite funny.

The boys looked just as confused as Julie, “What?” You said again.

“They-they-uh they are ghosts…” Julie said, clearly waiting for your reaction. Instead of freaking out, you just sat your bag down before reaching out to the boy closest to you.

But your hand didn’t go through his shoulder, it just landed softly. As if he was really sitting in front of you. You whipped your head towards Julie, this girl you barely knew. You both were absolutely confused.

“Why-um I can touch him?” You said, swallowed the thick lump in your throat. Did you die and go to heaven or something? The boy you were touching finally spoke up,

“Well that’s a new occurrence because Julie goes right through us… And hi, I’m Reggie.” He said, clearly uncomfortable with his new reality. You could touch him, and it seems you are the only one who could.

“Well hi, uh I am Y/N. I just became friends with Julie today and this is totally weird but yet cool.” You said, the scary and mean behavior that everyone was used to, sliding off. Revealing the hurt, and scared girl underneath, who was trying so hard to hold herself together throughout the day.

You were in your own world before Julie spoke up, “And that’s Alex, and of course Luke. Ignore him, he flirts too much” You just laughed at her remark.

Instead of making one friend, you made four in one day. That is a whole new record.

The next few months were filled with some of the happiest times before you were faced with something new. A crush, a crush on a ghost. Like how do you even approach something like that? There is no book for it...

“Julie, what do I do? I have a crush on a ghost, he’s not living and technically I am a freak of nature and shouldn’t be able to see him” You huffed before landing on her bed. She just laughed at your reaction.

“You a crush? I thought you were all mean and scary and didn’t need anyone? Besides whom is-” Throwing a pillow at her before she could finish her statement, she laughed at your horrified reaction.

‘Seriously Jules… you don’t need to ask who it is; you already know just think about it” You said, handing her your journal. It was filled with lyrics and journal entries. It never mentioned a name, but it was clear that it was Reggie. He had opened a door into your world, that you never ever wanted to close.

She sat across from you, squealing at each entry. It was everything you didn’t know how to say, you had never been good with words. Especially after your mom died, it was hard to open up to anyone and be able to hold real relationships. That’s were the mean and scary persona comes in, when you hide your feelings. No one wants to be your friends, which means you didn’t have to open up. But that changed with Julie and the guys.

Julie was too busy squealing to herself, that she missed the boy’s poof in. She only noticed they had company when Alex spoke up, “Whatcha reading?”

He carefully made his way over to where Julie was sat, when you ripped the journal out of her hands, “It is none of your business, okay? You need to be rehearsing anyways” You said, placing the journal back into your bag. You and Julie made your way to the garage, but little did you know the guys stayed behind to read said journal.

In their eyes it was clear you had a crush, and it was bad. You were falling hard… They knew something had changed, as you didn’t come across so harsh anymore and you genuinely seemed happy, more often than not.

They put the journal back, and poofed into the garage before you and Julie got there, but the moment you saw them, you knew. You knew they had done something, but you couldn’t put your finger on what. That was until Luke started to sing YOUR song lyrics under his breath,

Life is a risk, but I will take it

Close my eyes and jump

Together, I think that we can make it

C'mon let's run

And rise through the night, you and I

We will fight to shine together, bright forever

You quickly turned around, glaring in Luke’s direction. The minute he caught your gaze, he knew he was in deep trouble, not only with you but with Julie.

You charged at him; every ounce of happiness drained from your face. “YOU?!? Do not tell me you did what I think you did…”

If he had blood running through his veins, he would be as pale as a literal ghost. He carefully backed away from you, hiding behind Alex

“We just wanted to know… Who is the guy? Cause you have been a lot happier recently” Luke said, you pushed Alex out of the way before making a beeline for Luke. You swiftly picked up a book from the piano and chucked it at his head. Of course, it hit him instead of going through.

“OUCH… I may have forgot you can do that. But we just wanted to know. You don’t have the scary façade anymore; you seem more genuine which is something we love to see. I didn’t even notice it at first, Reggie did.” Luke said, rubbing the back of his head. You whipped around again, this time looking at Reggie. He looked like he was going to shit his pants any moment.

“And what do you have to say? Cause it better be good” You said, stepping closer to him.

“I just- You seem more yourself, and I love to see that. I only wanted to know who this lucky guy was because you are one in a million. That’s all, I just wanted to know who he was and if he would take care of you the way you deserve” Reggie said honestly, it felt good to get it off his chest.

Alex just Aww’d in the background until you gave him a deathly glare.

“Reggie all you had to do was ask, you didn’t have to read my journal. It doesn’t really tell you anything.” You said, as Reg laughed under his breath. You were so caught up in him, you missed Julie escorting the boys out, in their words “at the best part”

You took a deep breath before finishing your statement, you could feel the tears beginning to pool in your eyes.

“Reg I have always the girl everyone was terrified of. I was scary and mean, and I had no one. Everyone, and I mean everyone hated me, and no one wanted to be my friend... I met Julie and that helped some, but you came into my life and you opened a door into my dark world. You fill everything with light, and I have fallen for you so hard. I have been so scared to even say something, I know my behavior has changed but that it because of you. You bring a happiness into my world that I never want to be without. It is you, Reg. I love you.” You said, hot tears pouring down your face.

He stepped towards you as he watched you fall apart. Reaching out he placed a warm hand to your cheek. His calloused thumb rubbing away tears. He wanted nothing more than to take away the pain from your past. He wanted nothing more than to fill your life everyday with happiness until he was unable to anymore.

“You, my love have no idea how much I have fallen for you. You aren’t scary or mean... you are perfect. That is all I see in you.” He said, placing a swift kiss to your forehead.

For the first time in your life, someone was deciding to stay instead of running away. You weren’t scary, you just needed to find the right person to bring a light into your life that you were missing.

Reggie was that light.

Taglist:

@notasofti @julies-molina @parkeret @calamitykaty @kcd15 @crybabyddl

@all-in-fangirl @gia-kerks @morganayennefertyrell

#julie molina #julie and the fat ones #julie and the phantoms #julie x reader #alex julie and the phantoms #reggie julie and the phantoms #reggie #reggie x reader #reggiesmut #alex #alex x reader #hollywood ghost club #luke patterson imagines #luke patterson #luke patterson x reader #luke patterson smut #luke

[nobody-knose--archive]

i’ve been aching to commentate spirit phone’s commentary for ages. glad i finally got around to it, this was an ejoyable experience. liveblog below the cut

-i'm like half certain i've heard this commentary before. maybe not the whole way through & it was probably actual years ago

-nice hearing stuff like this. in-depth personal view of the album-making process. makes it seem like more of a real thing i could do myself someday

-neil cicierega real person momence

-i could probably go real in depth about neil cicierega/tally hall parallels specifically concerning like. the arc of their musical careers. but i won't, here

-wild how i legitimately don't care much about micheal jackson

-didnt we get a bunch of spirit phone stems from the needlejuice release/his patreon? we could probably hear the funny track he speaks of here in that

-i love hearing musical artists, especially neil cicierega, talking about the meanings of their songs. like, not only has this song been claimed to hell & back by the tumblr gays, but with later ones i just can't see where he gets these ideas from. also, claiming there's any one meaning or plot to a song just seems silly to me

-shoutout to neil reusing a midi from like, 1998, that he made at 12 years old, whose entire melody was reused for the main verses of everybody loves raymond. loved finding that out on my own 2 years ago. now it's common trivia in this fandom. not bad times

-it'd be neat if neil did individual trans tracks here like he did with view monstel, those things are half of why i consider it my favorite album

-it's a lot easier to ignore the creator's intended meaning behind a song when he can't even remember it. thanks neil

-seesaw effect

-and there's my joke all but 1 of my followers wont get. moving on

-what kinds of movie theater lobbies has neil been to where there are arcade machines. i mean im not one to talk but that does sound rather strange

-why do songs' titles even need to be taken from the lyrics. ive never seen that as any sort of requisite. it's like titling any form of prose you can just give it whatever name ya like

-"this part sounds pretty cool right"

-is neil's vocal range only mildly better than mine? with training i could change that

-oh i haven't processed any of the last 25 seconds hold on

-god. a shit ton of vocal modification in this song. it's like neil returned to his roots but with quality this time

-i, as an ace/aro, have never related more to an allohet guy in my life. what is the point of eyes!

-professional humming/whistling takes skill. it's different from the recreational or casual stuff. i'd know

-there's a name for the way sound (especially music) gets distorted when moving past you and i can't remember it but it's probably what neil's referring to here in the way he recorded the intro

(- update: it's the doppler effect no need to tell me cas already did)

-as someone who hasnt seen the rugrats or take me there by blackstreet i'll just say it sounded like a bouncy music box melody. nice to hear a song that messes with the typical scales though. lydian & diatonic.

-that's a rather specific thing to be glad about, but given what he talked about in his last full audio commentary about the jew harp i suppose i'm not surprised

-i know that tmbg song now. listened to it & saw the music video too. yep they're different alright

-where the hell does neil get all these instrumence from anyway

-huh. hadnt heard this part of the commentary before making my oc concerning this song but i like to hear neil's approval concerning part of my interpretation

-i love how ive heard a billion different tellings of this mellified man story from lem dem fans talking about this song and neil's is by far the wildest

-good god that does only make it worse neil

-i love making liveblogs of lemon demon albums. with the fullerenes or tally hall i cant name a specific dude to take out my woes on generally but with lemon demon i can just say neil all the time. i like being on a casual first name basis with this dude ive never interacted with once ever

-is sweet bod the one other than cabinet man with a demo in the bonus tracks? i forget

-holy shit the boston molasses disaster someone call up soapy if it doesnt already know, it'd love this

-two thousand nine. god i miss the fiddle solo. the ver with it is truly the best one

-he pronounces it jeff? i've always read it as gef with a hard g. that's what i get for knowing words that are never spoken aloud

-that's a fun meta interpretation of this ghost story that's over a century old. i like that

-i've noticed neil generally does the same synths across a whole album. it's especially more clear in the earlier ones, and does mean i occasionally mix up songs between clown circus & live from the haunted candle shop

-ah! ancient aliens! my least favorite track on this album. i cant even claim to have the least interest in a popular one i've just generally not liked this one much from the beginning. so im curious to see what neil's got to say, i think ive been in ~new commentary zone for a while now

-anyway. newest update on the loolin not realizing a song's funky time signature front: i think this one's in 6/4. or at least switches a lot between time signatures. granted i dont listen to it very often for the reasons stated above

-see the way neil describes it. eldritch horror upon being visited by the unknown at a time when humanity'd hadn't even yet had a chance to imagine such a thing occurring. should be right up my alley. but the sound itself & many of the lyrics simply turn me away.

-must i specify i don't dislike it? spirit phone is neil's best album it not being my favorite doesn't mean i think it's bad yadda yadda nobody should be surprised by this it's not like anyone in these fandoms reads my liveblogs <3

-granted i think this is. the first bit of spirit phone content i've made on my blog ever. so who knows things can change <3

-the transitions in spirit phone are much less view-monster transition tracks & more extended outros. view-monster's were a bit more intro than outro sure but they also seemed directed upon making a 2-way rather than 1-way bridge between tracks. or something like that

-.............soft fuzzy man is an incredible nickname for a cat. i'd steal that if i werent afraid of introducing my relatives to lemon demon

-jirls

-an underlying metaphor is good enough. the literal side of the lyrics are fun. nothing but agreement here neil my good man

-the transition into as your father i expressly forbid it from soft fuzzy man is the best one in this album

-buddy you ask if a musical idea has been used before odds are the answer is yes in this day & age the question is has it been used in the way you're using it. like sure this soul jazz record from the 60s that was sold out in kansas stores for a week used this bassline that youve found yourself copying. but seeing as youre using it in some angsty garage rock ballad type tune does anybody actually care

-doesn't everybody like to say things in an unhinged manner from time to time

-imagine having a guitar dad, i say, with my dad being a folk accordion/fiddle dad, which is infinitely worse in every way

-i think he was in an actual folk band at some point. idk the 90s were weird

-iron my life?

-m-more intimate? there are a lot of ways i'd describe this song but intimate isn't one of them. granted as your father is negatively intimate so from there i guess you've got nowhere to go but up

-...still glad to see his interpretation kinda supports my oc at least

-the way he says characters in songs shouldn't worry about death really strongly makes me think this is some sort of. thematic continuation of stuck from dinosaurchestra, even if there's no real death in there. interesting. would also mean that the dad from these past 2 songs is named carlos betty (no last name)

-i literally never assumed this was a flute solo. piccolo at best. it's pretty clearly a recorder

-my mom plays the recorder. i wonder if she can play recorder better than neil cicierega

-we can throw a party in honor of the crushing weight of responsibility! i simply won't be the one throwing it because i have enough on my plate already <3

-what the hell does "a sense of intent" mean

-i've never heard rush before however i disagree with neil's understanding of 6/4. 6/4 is meant to have emphasis (onbeat or another term i can't remember) on the 1st & 4th beat of every measure, which is greatly different from a measure of 4/4 then a measure of 2/4. it's why his 5/4 always sounds weird, because while it's recognizable in sequences of 10/4, it's more 2 measures of 4/4 with one of 2/4 tacked on the end. that's also how it's different from 3/4. i don't know much music theory but what i do understand i will fight to the death about

-"canonized" that's. a very interesting term to use when referring to a former president

-from now on i will interpret every love song directed at some unseen "you" to be inviting me to marry them for tax purposes. thanks neil for being an aromantic icon

-ah hell yes hell yes man-made object is my favorite goddam song on this album

-short & sweet & good damn vibes. neil's thoughts on it all are only making it better

-wild how he uses very few vocal effects for a song that he clearly is straining his vocal range for. go off neil

-the qualifier of man-made is a wonderful thing. oldest or biggest thing? oldest or biggest man-made thing? what a incredibly important specification. a world of possibilities lie between the two. oh i love it

-just gets me thinking yknow! what we consider weird/impressive in another species, in our own species- what kind of equivalent to that would there be from an outsider looking in? are there alien versions of the significances we place upon things, that we could never imagine? the limits of the human imagination mean we could never conceive of something else in the world that isn't, in some way great or small, just like us- and are we wrong for thinking that? such a juicy topic i wish there were a name for it because it's kinda hard to explain concisely

-spiral of ants. my second favorite song from this album, in fact. a good one to experience

-the vocals are just another instrument. they really truly are. i wasn't going into this commentary expecting to feel solidarity for neil cicierega in this chili's tonight on more than one occasion but here i am.

-like, his whole stance on interpreting songs is something i agree with almost entirely. you can take it at face value, you can dig to their very depths, you can listen to songs without caring what the lyrics mean whatsoever, and those are all fun. & yeah while any of these people can be annoying as one of the types who enjoys gliding on the surface more than anything i find those who dedicate themselves to figuring out the whole meaning of a song over anything else to be both slightly scary & slightly annoying <3 keep up the good work

-i want to make songs for my siblings the way neil makes songs for his sibling(s)

-spinch

-neil really shouldn't be allowed to be this funny like this whole album youre thinking golly! he's just a normal man this neil cicierega! and then he starts listing the cat hacks jokes & you remember he's had ridiculously consistent viral success with all his humorous endeavors and holy shit it's neil cicierega in action talking about his music. god bless you neil

-you're welcome, no problem, my pleasure. good eveternoon, radio audience!

#lemon demon #spirit phone #pretty sure this is my first bit of spirit phone content on my blog. hi greater lem dem fandom nice to see y'all. go listen to deporitaz #loolin liveblogs #i enjoyed this less for the content the commentary contained & more for the way i handled it. more pleasant than some times ive had #tis i #i havent listened to spirit phone in general in ages. i know why. so this was nice #to the world and back again

[emilywatchescursedshow]

S1 E19 - Provenance

Director: Philip Sgriccia Writers: Eric Kripke, David Ehrman

These two are def gonna be murdered by this painting which I’m in favor of.

Yes they are getting murdered by the painting

Dean getting digits we love to see it

Lmao I stopped watching this episode like 2 weeks ago now I’m back baby jetlagged and can’t work so here we are back at it

Dean is smiling very uncomfortably and bringing two beers to a table that already has two full beers on it

“What’s that supposed to mean” i think the meaning was pretty clear

Dean is... hungover?? Why is he asleep in the car? This is not explained its just supposed to be funny ?

License plate “the krip”

“It’s like a garage sale for WASPs if you ask me” Dean pretty sure you’re a wasp man, unless you were raised Catholic ??

Dean has some attitude in this episode I like it, eating just everything he can get his hands on

Oh was the setup of Dean getting a woman to contrast with Sam trying to get this woman with his brains and charm

This painting looks ugly AF.

Gross she’s giving Sam wistful looks for literally just that??

Oh this is a choice of hotel decor

Sam is very uncomfortable he looks like a baby. Wow this was the lipgloss era huh

What is the thing with the wine list “I’ll have a beer” girlboss moment

Why is she so quick to give up all this information abt her mom?

We are spending so long on this scene. Ok it’s over now

The lighting in this hotel scene is pretty good, very nice half illuminated faces

we are 10 minutes into the episode this cannot work but this is very good 90s era hacker scifi breakin music/pacing/lighting

It is so bright in my room and I cannot see anything

Yeah it’s a pretty hideous painting

Oh they have to destroy the frame ?

I guess this is how they figure out the painting is still around and this is such an awkward scene Sam trying to act through Dean crushing his story is very funny. “OH MY GOD” cannot contain himself at seeing the painting freaks completely out. Wow this girl has a lot of patience

OHH WE HAVE MORE PAPER PROPS YESSSSS THESE WERE SO WELL DONE BEFORE AND THEY ARE AGAIN NOW!!! Love this librarian too, very excited about the murders and the lore this is me about the paper props

Dad sold the painting again

Dean is actually trying to be a good older brother here what a sweetie. I did forget that Jessica was a thing. Ok so we don’t get an explicit explanation of what “the main part” is

Why would someone actively try to get that painting

She’s just standing by while they pick the lock oh no she’s here too

Is she going to be a regular on the show?

We love Dean standing by forcing Sam to do all the heavy lifting. Why does sam only have one tone of voice.

“Sam. Marry that girl” she’s having some real girlboss moments here.

Wow those pants are so low waisted we hate the 2000s. Another lipgloss moment

“We don’t get paid” big mood

Oh no is it gonna actually get romantic between them? WOW SHE JUST STRAIGHT UP ASKED HIM good for her. This is a lot of progression in one episode after they literally just met. Oh he’s telling her that his girlfriend died. Ok two data points don’t make a curse Sam. “Very sweet and very archaic.” WOW ANOTHER GIRLBOSS MOMENT. She’s really bursting through all his walls at once after knowing him like 3 days. She also lost her mom so this seems a little insensitive on Sam’s part “oh boo hoo my gf died it was so sad” well her mom died and now she wants to bone down after being sad for a year.

I hope it turns out that she’s playing him and leaves him after they fuck that would be so girlboss of her.

It was the little girl the whole time her soul is in the doll that’s a nice twist.

Pretty sure they’ve used the “low sodium freaks” joke before

YES CREEPY LITTLE GIRL

We need to know how they figure out where her soul is which is why they keep flashing to the doll

“That is just so wrong” great line

THEY LITERALLY KEEP FLASHING TO THE DOLL oh it’s so Sarah can have another girlboss moment

I keep calling these girlboss moments but it doesn’t really count as such I’m sorry

GO DEAN GO

oH NO Sarah is going to have to fight by herself now another girlBOSS moment

Yeah you moron literally just shoot the glass in

Suspense

Wow the hair really lit up didn’t it

Why is she bleeding oh who cares Sam is touching her finally

Oh I was genuinely hoping they’d kiss bc I’m a freak.

Oh no a touching goodbye. No Dean, we only thank you for getting out of the way so it can be Sam’s episode. SHE WANTS TO FUCK HIM SO BAD lmao that’s sweet.

Oh is she gonna run out and kiss him are we gonna get that no he’s coming back to do it literally stomping on her girlboss moment.

Gross Dean look away.

#spn #supernatural liveblog #supernatural #s1e19

[klvht]

The Occult vs. “A Cult”

The Occult vs. “A Cult”

How many can agree that Christianity is a cult?

I thought so too, at first.

I grew up in a Catholic faith, went to a Catholic church, and attended a Catholic school. Over the years, it has changed. I have been to a few different churches, but all focused-on God.

I believe a couple days ago, that God put it on my heart to write about the occult and witchcraft, but I wasn’t sure how to, in order to get my full point across; So I figured I’d just share my journey.

As many of you know, I used to live in Salem, MA & have been visiting there for most of my life. (Shout out to Mr. Roy who had brought my father up there almost his whole life as well, R.I.P.) Don’t get me wrong, Salem is a BEAUTIFUL place, and I love it there, even til this day. The area is super peaceful, has an amazing history, and is overly beautiful. I believe that Salem is one of the centers of witchcraft, and unfortunately, I got into it too. I used to read oracle cards, use a pendulum, practice spells, create sigils, the list goes on. Even as a little girl, my parents were getting their car fixed, and there was a witch there who wanted to speak with me, for whatever reason, which now I find funny that I ended up walking down the same unrighteous path as her later on in life (but as early as 12 years old).

Let’s go back to the home that started it all... upstate, NY. I got my first pack of oracle cards when I used to live in a house built in the 1800’s; my mom purchased them for me. They were contained in a beautiful package littered with “Angel” messages, that would help me tell the future. I also had my first pendulum in that house that I purchased from a visit in Salem. It was a beautiful home, the first one my parents purchased, and we had acres of land, including and above ground pool, a separate garage/bay/barn area, chickens, guinea hens, and an awesome pup.

Above the garage/bay/barn area, there was a door. You walked up the stairs in my backyard, up the hill to the right, and found it. It was very weird, but since the home was so old, we never thought anything about it. I remember the first door, and first room. It was wood, dark, damp, and gross lol. But if you kept walking forward, you came to this second door. I cannot stress enough that this door had Satanic writing all over it, including warnings saying “demon/devil inside”, “do not open”, had a big pentagram on the door, as well as sigils written all over it in what I believed to be red paint or ink. Thinking about it now, I wish I never had the curiosity to open that door, I wish I understood that it was a true warning, whether people believed it to be or were just fooling around. I truly believe upon opening that door is what could have led to the outpouring of demonic and evil spirits in that house, and could have latched on to my family, because once we moved into that home, things were never the same. I remember a trap door being in there, and I remember a burst of warm/hot air that came out as soon as I opened it. It took me a while to open that door, and I’m not sure if that was the only reason, but there were ghosts in my house, and demons, and no one knew any better. My mother saw, felt, and heard a few different ghosts in that house. One she called the ‘cowboy ghost’ which stood in the doorway in one of the hallways that went by my living room and led to the upstairs. She was also in our downstairs bathroom one time, and heard a woman call out “Hello…” as if she just wanted my mother to know that she was there. Lastly, my mother was asleep on the couch one day, and woke up to something screaming in her face, which I know now, had to be a demon. My sister at the time, who could not have been older than 4 when we were living at that house, saw a little boy ghost walk straight through the wall. I never saw anything, but I never really have, I’ve just always been the one to feel presences.

There was sooo much negative energy in that house, and sorry to say it, but so much had manifested over time and had increased the greediness, heartlessness, separation, and negativity in my family. I didn’t see my parents much, they ran a successful construction business out of the home, us kids would NEVER go downstairs or walk around at night by ourselves, and my brother was definitely attacked and latched to in that house.

Upon seeing, feeling, and experiencing all this, my mom went to the local psychic to find out what was going on. She did not know, but trust me, you guys should NOT be relying on a psychic to tell you about your life. The psychic may tell you true things, they may be able to see your home through their ‘third eye’, and they could probably predict things that actually came true at a later date, BUT their messages come from Satan, and other evil spirits who wish to destroy, manipulate, and kill. I’ve experienced this a few times, I’ll elaborate in a few paragraphs to come. The psychic my mom went to, described our home “to a T”. She spoke about my grandfather who had passed, and other life experiences my mom had gone through, which most psychics start off with to gain trust. Then she moved on to how a dark entity was basically scaring my brother day in and day out; he wouldn’t even shower alone. She told my mom how our home was a “walk through” for spirits because there were two cemeteries on each side of the home, down the road both ways. I don’t remember if we ever tried to pray Jesus over the home, or had a priest bless the home.

My mother became ill in that house. Long story short, she collapsed on her and my father’s wedding anniversary in 2005, and my dad resuscitated her. I fully believe she has been latched on to, regardless of what anyone says. It has been 15 years, and the doctors STILL don’t know what is fully wrong or what happened that day. She has had multiple operations, been on a variety of medications, and still, cannot seem to get better.

My most recent encounter was with the New Age religion, earlier in this quarantine time, sometime in February 2020, which seems to collaborate all types of faiths, such as buddhism, chakra practices, satanism, witchcraft, meditation, spirit guides, and even some excerpts from the Bible. The problem was, that I have always known that I had a type of psychic gift, as well as, I considered myself to be an empath; and while that may be true, I did not hold the true meaning or source of these gifts, that were given to me by God, and manipulated by Satan.

What I got out of being involved with multiple groups of “The Great Awakening”, moving from “4D to 6D consciousness”, practicing “meditation” to find my “spirit guides”, “the law of attraction”, etc. was that it is ALL motivated by Satan and manipulated to deceive the souls created by God, to fool them, and to use them for his purpose, just by putting a simple twist on the subject, and to practice this type of inclusivity that the world had never seen before. That’s the thing about Satan, he appears warm & fuzzy, cool & collected, cares about all types of love and inclusivity, JUST to deceive people. He’s an evil mastermind. Remember that when he decides to reveal himself and push his new world order, just as the Bible says will come in these end times.

Let me tell you, the New Age religion is false. I found myself headed down the path very abruptly, and it was like I could not focus on anything else. Whatever demons I was letting into my life legally, (because that’s what you do when you welcome and practice in sin, worldly matters, emotions, feelings, and forms of witchcraft), were now starting to manifest and turn my whole world upside down. I was in a dark and depressed time, suicidal thoughts were again surfacing, I wasn’t caring about my wellbeing, I was hateful towards others, the list goes on.

One day I was meditating to find my “spirit guides”, and idk maybe about 10-15 minutes in, while focusing on my ‘third eye’ chakra, I saw a demon. A literal demon. It was crawling on all fours, had menacing, scary, sharp, flesh ripping teeth, and it JUMPED at me. (Think of those stupid jump scare videos on social media). As SOON as that happened, I called out to Jesus and said the ‘Our Father’ prayer, and instantly at once, I felt safe again. It was either that day or a few days later, that Jesus visited me in a dream to save me once again, because I had decided to focus on dark powers to give myself purpose, identity, and power. He was there for me, even though I left the path that He was with me on.

Others that I have spoken to that once practiced meditation and finding ‘spirit guides’, said that as soon as they turned to Christianity and Jesus once again, the same thing happened. These ‘spirit guides’ were demonic in spirit, but appeared as nice, helpful beings initially. This is terrifying stuff guys, but that’s what Satan is all about. He wants to deceive you until the very last second when Jesus comes, just so you will worship Satan and his beasts, rather than knowing that you can call on Jesus anytime to come help. There really is no way to “close the circle” as some witches call it during some of their sacrificing, or “white magic” rituals.

I have to admit, that I do feel guilty and a bit of groaning within me because I waited so long to write on this, because God put it in my mind and in my heart a couple days ago. And now look, there’s a full moon/eclipse that’s happening tonight, and witches all around the world are trying to “hex the racists”, “restore order”, and “bring peace” with their practices TONIGHT. I’m just glad that God showed me that before I went another day without writing on this subject.

Again, if you have any questions or want to hear more about my experiences, (I have plenty more that I may write about), feel free to comment or inbox me.

Thanks for reading,

God Bless You,

Jesus Saves.

I love you guys.

#occult #satanist #satanism #religion #perspective #truth #realtalk #personal #storytime #horror #truestory #experience #personal experience #psychic #witchcraft #witch #jesus #jesusismysavior #christianity #cult

[witchofthemidlands]

WHY POWER RANGERS 2017 DESERVED A SEQUEL. In This Essay I Will...

A lot of people are gonna disagree with me on this, but in my opinion, Power Rangers 2017 is a goddam masterpiece. It’s probs my second favourite film of all time. It’s beautiful, it’s funny, I felt that soundtrack in my soul and it has an amazing cast. I adore it, alright? Have done since I brought the dvd, because I couldn’t see it in cinemas at the time, because of those stupid ass exams... Anyway, I’m in a shitty headspace, I kinda want to yeet myself out of a window, I’ve had a drink, so, like the piece of actual garage I am, I am going to yeet myself into the trash can of Power Rangers 2017 & explain, why I believe that this film deserved a sequel.

First off THE CHARACTERS. Honestly, one the best things about this entire film is just these five wonderful characters. I could’ve watched these characters do random shit for a whole twenty four hours & not get bored istg, they’re great & they all deserved the world.

Jason Scott: Red Ranger, leader of the squad. Jason is probably my favourite out of the squad if I had to pick one & that’s not just because he’s played by the absolute legend, Dacre Montgomery. Jason won me over from the minute he said ‘tHat’S nOt aN uDDeR dUDe!’ (how tf did the cow get out of the gym to be in the field when Jason’s driving away though) Jason was completely different from everything I was expecting him to be. I thought he was just gonna be another one of those dumbass jock characters, who would slowly start to get on my nerves, but nope. Unlike what I was expecting, this character showed a great range of emotions. He was loyal, brave, hugged his best mate twice and cared so much about his family & friends. I mean the guy went so goddam HARD for Billy Cranston after only knowing him for five minutes. I stan that level of immense friendship.

Kimberly Hart: Pink Ranger. I adored her, honestly, I loved everything about her. She was played by the gorgeous Naomi Scott & was a really interesting character, because she was a character that had done a really shitty thing, but was trying to do better. What I liked about all these characters, was that they were all flawed in some way & were not perfect like all these kinds of films try to portray their characters, which was honestly, why Power Rangers was such a breath of fresh air, because it actually showed decent characters, that were not perfect and were working to try and become the best versions of themselves, but knew that they had a long way to go before they could do that. Kimberly was a part of a cyber bullying incident & it was great to see that they never tried to excuse the shit she did, but got her to accept that she did do it and that she couldn’t change what she did. When I first watched this film, I immediately expected Kim to be a major bitch, but she wasn’t. Seriously, these characters were so well written istg. Also, I know the kiss scene was deleted & I both agree & disagree about them deleting it (I shipped Jason & Kim, guys. Then again, I pretty much shipped them all at random times. Jason & Kim, Jason & Billy, Kim & Trini, all the Rangers in one big beautiful poly relationship etc) Yet, what I did like about it was how forward Kim was, most these teen based films, it’s always the guy who makes the first move, gives the first kiss etc, but ma girl, Kim WENT for it. I mean, she full on went for it & topped Jason. I have never stanned harder. You go, Kim! Again, I adored her. Enough said.

Billy Cranston: Blue Ranger, honestly the purest of them all. I loved this guy from the second he appeared (screw that asshole who broke his pencils in his first scene I’d have done more than just slapped that bitch istg), he cared so much about his mates, he gave everything into becoming a Ranger, like the guy was so pumped about becoming a superhero. Too pure for this world, I swear & was such a cheerful character, I mean, the poor dude literally died & he was still probs the happiest of them all. His friendship with Jason was literally one of the best friendships I’ve seen in a film between two dudes, they loved each other & were pretty much joined at the hip throughout the film, honestly legends. Again, these writers really wrote some bloody good characters, because they wrote Billy to be an autistic character & it’s rare to see representation of autistic characters, especially ones that are main characters, which is another reason why the character of Billy Cranston was greatly appreciated, because they handled it well. I will always love that scene where Billy is trying to explain his autism to Jason & he’s just like ‘you don’t have to explain it to me.’ Because Jason accepted him for who he is right away. This friendship was beautiful & the fact that we were robbed of seeing more of it in a sequel is a crime against nature.

Zack Taylor: Black Ranger, was honestly my dude. This guy was so much fun, but honestly, the stand out thing about his character was how much he loved his mother! I appreciate how realistically written these characters are, I really do. It was great to finally see a teenage character who was shown to be a care provider for a relative. It broke my soul when Zack said that his greatest fear was coming home & finding his mother dead, as someone who helps care for a relative, that is a very real fear & I appreciated how they wrote Zack’s explanation about his mother. Another thing I liked about him, was that even though he was a tease & flirted with Trini throughout most of the film, he totally cooled it down when she admitted that she was questioning her sexuality. Honestly, a character to stan here.

Trini: Yellow Ranger, an absolute mood. Oof, what a character. I honestly didn’t know that Becky G could act, but she honestly blew me away in Power Rangers. Trini was definitely one of the best characters in the film, she came across as tough as nails, but she slowly started to find a family in the Ranger Squad. Her & Kim were awesome (I pretty much ship all these characters in various ships, but I gotta admit, I got some hella gay vibes during that doughnut scene). She evidently had helicopter parents, but got on well with her siblings, even if one did say that he thought the Yellow Ranger was a dude, honestly iconic. There was an interesting part where she was talking questioning her sexuality & her parents want to use labels, again, these writers really gave it their all with these characters, because that is incredibly realistic & I really felt for her.

Seriously, this is an incredibly talented cast (Dacre Montgomery deserves whatever awards they can throw at him for Stranger Things) & is one of the more diverse casts I’ve seen in a film & the fact that they want to reboot it again without this cast is just wrong. Yeah, the story was a bit patchy in places, it wasn’t a groundbreaking film, but to me it was a masterpiece, because it made me feel things, it made me laugh, it gave me something I could escape to when I needed it. It had fantastically written characters that you could actually relate to and it was just a whole lot of fun. There’s so much shite out there these days that gets sequels green lit that isn’t nearly as half as good as Power Rangers 2017 was. They also didn’t give us a complete ending, what with the post credit scene, where it seemed like they were introducing their proposed version of Tommy Oliver. I wanted to see who they’d want as Tommy, how they’d write the character & how they’d change the character. I heard somewhere (don’t quote me on this I saw it on tumblr) that Tommy could’ve been a woman in this version, that would’ve been epic. They had so much potential there & they just gave up & decided to reboot because of what? Was it because the film did that badly, did the cast not want to do a second film? I totally respect them for that if they didn’t, but it totally sucks ass that they’re rebooting it again, because they had the perfect set up there, they had a banging soundtrack, the best cast known to man & god & PLEASE can someone create an actual Alpha Five? I need a motivational robot like that in my life.

Power Rangers 2017 deserved sequels.

However, if it must be rebooted, my fan cast for the reboot would be.

Dacre Montgomery - Jason Scott

Naomi Scott - Kimberly Hart

RJ Cyler - Billy Cranston

Becky G - Trini

Ludi Lin - Zack Taylor

Bill Hader - Alpha Five

Whoever they want for the rest of the cast.

POWER RANGERS 2017 DESERVED BETTER FOLKS.

✌️

#power rangers 2017

[caranfindel]

Recap/review 14.15: “Peace of Mind”

THEN: Snakes. Michael. Donatello’s soul, or lack thereof. Samwitch. Jack’s soul spell. All the other hunters are dead. I am a Winchester!

NOW: A young man runs down a street (past a movie theater showing Scooby Doo, hee!) and into what seems to be a malt shop. He embraces the young woman working there and says he doesn’t want to leave without her, but she says she made a promise, and sends him on his way. He doesn’t get very far. He runs past the sign welcoming you to Charming Acres (“Where everybody’s happy!”) and into a convenience store, where his head explodes. Title card!

Bunker. Jack is cuddling with Felix, the snake he rescued from last week’s MotW. Cas comes to check on him, and he says he’s good, but Cas disagrees. Jack tells him the snake doesn’t feel well, and Cas thinks maybe he misses his monstery owner, and he’s been through a lot of change lately. Just like Jack! Cas asks Jack if he has his powers back, because enough time has passed that they’ve had funerals for all the hunters and yet no one has asked him that yet. He thinks so, and demonstrates by levitating a pencil.

(I guess if they’d asked him earlier, and he’d shown them the pencil trick, they might have said “cool, how about you bring all these dead hunters back to life?” Would that have been a good thing or a bad thing? Discuss.)

He says he feels different, and Cas asks about his soul. The pencil drops to the floor. Ha, that’s not symbolic at all. Jack doesn’t know how much of his soul he burned off when he killed Michael, and he tries not to think about it. Huh. I wish there was someone, anyone here in the bunker, maybe even someone in the room here with Jack, who knew how to see if he had any soul left. But apparently there isn’t. Okay then. {sigh}

In the kitchen, Dean’s eating a huge sandwich. Cas says he thought he was going to sleep “until the cows dragged you home,” and there’s a cute moment where Dean starts to explain and realizes it’s pointless. He says Rowena called and is “not great, but coping.” Cas tells him Jack claims he’s good and asks about Sam. “He says he’s good,” Dean replies. “I think they’re both full of crap.”

Sam arrives at the bunker during this conversation and stops to unload at the map table and reveals that Dean is right, he’s not good at all. He has flashbacks of the other hunters slumped dead at the table, and Maggie running toward him calling his name as she dies, and he’s just so beautifully upset (hi, I’m Caranfindel and I have a problem) and on the verge of tears, and can I just say how much I appreciate that Show is not ignoring how traumatic this would be for him? And not just because his trauma is so damn pretty.

Sam comes into the kitchen, brandishing his tablet, and tells Dean he found a case. Like, just now on his way home, apparently. Dean says they just did three hunts back-to-back and he needs a night off, and so does Sam. So, where was Sam coming from? Did he go on a hunt without Dean? Did they come home together, and Sam sat in the Impala looking at his tablet while Dean came in and made a sandwich?

Sam takes this in and completely ignores it and says “well, I’m leaving in ten.” Dammit, y'all. Traumatized, driven Sam. I love it. I also love that his attitude is “this is what I need, so this is what I’m doing.” Cas volunteers to go with him and tells Dean he should stay with Jack, because he looks up to him. “And his soul… you’ve seen this before.”

Oh. Well. Yes, Dean has seen this before. Sam has LIVED this before. I wonder who would be the best person to talk to Jack about being possibly soulless? (And I also still wonder if there’s ANYBODY in this bunker who is in a better position to detect Jack’s soul. ANYBODY AT ALL.)

No, no, see, I was not great with Sam when he was, uh…

But Jack’s soul isn’t completely gone. At least, I don’t think so. We just don’t know how much is left?

Well, how am I supposed to figure that out?

I don’t know! Just talk to him. Get him to open up.

Jesus. Okay. I do appreciate that Dean recognizes he didn’t necessarily handle the Soulless!Sam situation well. But I’m having a hard time getting past the fact that CAS KNOWS HOW TO CHECK FOR THE PRESENCE OF A SOUL. {sigh}

With the guys separated, I’m going to stick with Cas and Sam instead of going back and forth. Cas and Sam drive up to the convenience store where the guy’s head exploded. Cas is driving. I don’t know why. I don’t know why Sam doesn’t have a car of his own. I don’t know why Cas replaced the Pimpmobile, or why they’re not using any of those cars in the bunker’s garage. I don’t know a lot of things. (I know Sam’s in an overcoat and I like it.)

They think they’re looking for a witch or demon. Sam yawns but says he’s fine, because that’s what they do, and Cas lectures him on needing to rest. “Can’t,” Sam says. “Just because I’m tired doesn’t mean the monsters are gonna stop. Doesn’t mean anything. Plus, we don’t have as many hunters as we used to.” Oh Saaaaammmmmy.

They introduce themselves to the clerk as Agents Scholz and Delp, which I immediately recognize as members of Boston, but it’s not until halfway through the episode that I realize the title is a Boston song. Oh, you clever, clever show. They tell the clerk they’re investigating “the incident,” and he says “incident? that’s what we’re calling it?” and I have an out-of-body experience because I used almost that exact dialog in a fic (waves to Steve Yockey, who surely reads my LJ). The clerk tells them what happened and that the victim, Conrad, probably came from Charming Acres, a place he calls “weird.”

Turns out Charming Acres is weird in a very retro way - it’s like a town straight out of the 50s. Well-dressed people wearing hats roam its perfectly clean streets. “It’s like we’re stepping into a Saturday Evening Post,” Cas says. He gets a funny look from Sam, and I don’t know why, because surely Sam remembers that Metatron crammed all of that cultural knowledge into Cas’s head. “I look at them after you fall asleep at night,” Cas explains, and if I were a Sastiel shipper I’d point out that he says after you fall asleep instead of after you go to bed, suggesting that he doesn’t just know when Sam goes to bed, he knows when he falls asleep. But I’m not, so I won’t.

There’s no cell service in Charming Acres, which is probably part of the reason why it’s so charming; none of these people walking around have their noses in a phone. Sam gets out of the car and bumps into a couple - Justin Smith and his “foxy wife” Cindy. They don’t know anything about a death, but they suggest the nice G-men ask around at Harrington’s, the malt shop we saw earlier. Justin asks what Sam is holding, and is mystified at the answer. “Cell phone. A cell phone?” he muses, as they walk away.

“What was that?” Sam wonders. Cas answers “Maybe they’re Mormon?” Hee!!!

Harrington’s, where your first milkshake is free. Uh oh. Guys, never trust that. Sure, the first one is free, but that’s how they hook you, and the next one will COST you. Sunny, the chick from the opening, is working behind the counter. Sam’s doctor from “The Born-Again Identity” comes out from the kitchen and tells her to make sure they have more root beer, and she says she already sent the order. She then puts a couple of shakes on the counter for Sam and Cas. It’s like she knew they were coming. Sam tells her they didn’t order, but she says the first one’s free. Don’t drink that shake, Sam! But he does, and is surprised at how good it is. Cas just takes a whiff and calls it “delicious.” Mmmm, smells like molecules.

(Sidebar: I’m not the only one who’s watched “The Born Again Identity” enough times to immediately recognize that guy and remember his name, am I?)

Dr. Kadinsky comes back out and starts to make a request, but Sunny already knew what the customer wanted. It’s almost like she’s psychic or something. He introduces himself to the guys as Chip Harrington and calls them “the G-men I keep hearing about,” even though they literally got out of the car three minutes ago. “It’s a small town,” he says. He’s also the mayor, and says they’re old-fashioned, but people here take care of each other. The guys ask about Conrad, who Chip thinks died of an aneurysm. “Oh, no,” Cas says. “His head exploded. Like a ripe melon on the sun.” The entire place goes silent, and y'all, I miss me some s4 BAMF Cas, but sometimes bumbling, socially awkward Cas is a delight. Flustered Sam is also a delight, as always.

Chip tells the guys where Conrad lived, so their next stop is Dowling’s charming Victorian boarding house, planning to check for sulfur and hex bags. Mrs. Dowling knows who they are and is expecting them. “Small town,” she explains. She shows them Conrad’s room and tells them he was a nice young man. She only rents to men. Women living alone isn’t proper. “Morals. Gotta have morals.” She turns to Cas. “You know.“ I… I don’t know what this means. Even on rewatch, I don’t. At first I thought maybe she detected Cas was an angel. But now I just have to admit, I don’t get it.

Sam asks for coffee as a way to get her out of the room so Cas can search it. He finds nothing of note except a few letters under the mattress. He tells Sam they’re "surprisingly passionate.” Passionate how, Sam asks, as he sips coffee from a teeny cup. “She spends quite a bit of time talking about shape and heft of his-” Sam interrupts just in time and says they should check that out tomorrow. Tomorrow, because he wants to spend the night here, and he probably needs some rest, and Mrs. Dowling is making pot roast. Cas is increasingly befuddled, and Sam is really getting into Charming Acres. And HE IS SO CUTE.

Meanwhile, over at the Smith’s, Foxy Cindy is putting dinner on the table, while Justin is still muttering about a cell phone. “I bought a cell phone. In Houston. For my daughter.” He suddenly remembers his daughter and asks Cindy who she is, and what he’s doing here. She doesn’t have a clue what’s going on. He runs outside and, just like Conrad earlier, gets weird bulges on his face and then suffers a head explosion.

Morning in the boarding house. Cas knocks on Sam’s door, but his room is empty. He goes downstairs and finds Mrs. Dowling vacuuming. She’s wearing earbuds, so Charming Acres might not have cell phones, but it looks like they have mp3 players. She seems annoyed that Cas is there, but offers him some breakfast. He tells her he doesn’t eat and says he’s looking for his partner. “The very nice, the very tall fella? He said he’s going for a walk. And a milkshake.” Dammit, Sam, I warned you. IT’S THE MILKSHAKES.

But when Cas gets to Harrington’s, they’re just opening, and Sam isn’t there. The music playing is the same thing Mrs. Dowling was listening to, and I don’t know if that means anything. He’s also got a huge bird crap on his car, and I don’t know if that means anything, either. Maybe it’s just supposed to be indicative of his day. He tells Sunny he’s looking for his partner, and she says “the tall man” left when he heard what happened to Mr. Smith.

Smith house. Cas drives up and is greeted by a cheery, not-in-mourning, Foxy Cathy. She offers him a martini, which he declines. “I’m looking for my partner. The tall man.” She doesn’t know what he’s talking about. “Hair? He has beautiful hair.” (OH MY GOD.)

“This is complicated,” Cas says, and the poor guy is just more and more puzzled. I don’t usually appreciate a Cas-heavy episode, but I’ve gotta say, he’s killing it. He sits down and Foxy Cindy screams NO! He jumps up and she sweetly explains “that’s my husband’s chair.” Okay, so she is a little distraught over his death, but just handling it weirdly? Um, no.

I’m so sorry, but last night, his head… um… your husband, he died last night.

I think you’re confused. Have you already had your martini today?

Cas continues to try to convince her Justin is dead, and then a familiar voice from upstairs says “Honey, is something wrong” and then…

Agent?

Justin. Justin Smith.

IT’S SAM. SAM DRANK THE KOOLAID MILKSHAKE AND NOW HE’S ONE OF THEM. His hair is pulled back in a ponytail and he’s wearing glasses and a cardigan with a tie (the same cardigan from “American Nightmare?” maybe) and I AM DEAD.

Cas thinks Sam is doing this on purpose, and when Cindy goes to make a martini, he asks him “who does she think you are?” But Sam absolutely believes he’s Justin Smith. He requests three olives in his martini because “I’m feeling adventurous” and Cindy does a little mewl and he says “rawr!” and REALLY I CANNOT HANDLE IT. Neither can Cas.

Sam, I don’t know what’s happened, I don’t know if this is a spell, or a curse, or what’s happened, but you will SNAP THE HELL OUT OF IT.

Sir. You watch your mouth. If we cannot remain civil, then you can skedaddle.

Sam-

That’s not my name. Cindy, grab his hat.

I don’t wear a hat.

(Honey, I don’t think he wore a hat!)

Fine. Sir, using language like that. H E double hockey sticks. You should have your mouth washed out with soap.

OH MY GOD. Sam ushers him out the front door and lectures him with the Single Upraised Finger of Reasonableness and lord, I hope Jared had as much fun doing this as I’m having watching it. And I didn’t like the brothers being separated AGAIN, but now I understand. There’s no way Dean wouldn’t have sucked down a milkshake. But since Cas doesn’t eat, he’s safe. (Sidebar: Don’t you think Sam would have shaved? Discuss.)

It’s nighttime when Cas shows up back at Harrington’s. He accuses Sunny of being a witch who brainwashed Sam and the entire town. She denies it, but he shows her the letters he found, where she begged him to leave. She tries to run, but he grabs her and does the glowy eyes and says “tell me, or I’ll rip it from your mind” and hmmm, that’s a nice flash of angry, protective-of-Sam Cas. Terrified, she confesses that “it’s not me, it’s him, he’s out of control.” And “him” is Chip, who is standing behind them with a few friends. Including Sam. Duh duh duh!!!

So you did this.

What, did you think it was the milkshakes?

Dammit, I did. I completely and totally fell for that. It turns out Chip is just psychic or something. The mill shut down and his wife died and his town was going downhill and he started hearing voice and he screamed “just make things better!” and then, wow, things became better. He wished there were more people at his shop, and there were. “I made everybody happy.” And he murdered the rest. (Sidebar: Is this a political statement about people who wish we could go back to “the good old days?” Discuss.) He says his tricks never worked on Sunny, because she’s too much like him, which explains why she knew the root beer needed to be ordered and the G-men were coming in - she’s psychic too. He asks why his powers don’t work on Cas, and Cas says “because I’m not human,” and he has no problem accepting that.

Sunny runs outside and Chip follows. Sam and the other two guys stay to attack Cas. He tells Sam he won’t hurt him, and gives him the Single Raised Finger of Reasonableness again and says “golly, I told you my name is Justin!” Oh, golly Sam, you’re killing it. Cas takes the other two guys down pretty easy, but Sam knocks him to the floor, and he may have forgotten his own name but he knows where Cas keeps his angel blade. Cas, of course, is trying not to hurt him, and it’s hard to defend yourself against someone who’s trying to kill you when you don’t want to hurt them, so all he can do is try to talk Sam out of stabbing him.

Fight this.

Why? I’m happy in Charming Acres. We’re all happy.

Sam, I know you want to be happy. And I know what it’s like to lose your army. I know what it’s like to fail as a leader, Sam. But you can’t lose yourself. You have to keep fighting. You can’t lose yourself because if you do, you fail us, you fail all of those that we’ve lost. You fail Jack. Sam, you fail Dean!

And that does it. Sam jams the angel blade into the floor next to Cas’s head (just like MoC Dean did) and takes of the glasses. Looks like he found himself.

Meanwhile, outside, Chip is telling Sunny that she’s just as responsible for Conrad’s death as he is, and she can’t stop him, because in this town, he’s God. Sam shows up to smack him upside the head. “No, you’re not, believe me. We’ve met God.” “God has a beard,” Cas adds. I’M DEAD AGAIN.

Chip uses his powers on Sam and he gets the bulges that mean his head is going to explode and no, not his head! That’s one of my favorite parts! Sunny finds her own power and stops him. “You want to be happy? Then be happy.” She whammies Chip and he gets a blank look on his face and I’m pretty sure I’ve referenced the Ren and Stimpy Happy Helmet at some point, but I’m thinking about it again. Cas puts a hand on his head and says “She made him happy. Your father is trapped inside his own mind. He’s in a world that - it’s a beautiful world, but it’s a place where he can never hurt anyone again.”

Which makes me think (1) it’s too bad this isn’t a solution for all those “good old days” people, and (b) WHY CAN’T CAS READ JACK???? WHY?????

Now let’s see what’s happening in the bunker. Jack is trying to feed Felix a variety of different foods, but he won’t eat. Maybe it’s because he’s on newspaper, which seems like it would be uncomfortable for a snake. Dean is adorably uncomfortable.

Have you tried bacon?

Do snakes like bacon?

I don’t… I like bacon.

He also opens a box that appears to be leftover Chinese food but actually contains white mice. Hee! He invites Jack on a drive. Not a hunt, “more like a field trip.” We see them driving through the night, with the snake riding in the back seat. Dean suggest Jack have a snack, but he says he’s not hungry, so Dean says he should try feeding the snake. He gives him two packaged snack cakes - one devil’s food, and one angel food. Oh, Dean, you are the least subtle person on earth and I adore you.

I don’t think you have a firm grasp on what snakes eat.

Yeah, no. I always thought they were kinda cool, though.

Most people think they’re dangerous.

Well, it’s not the snake that’s dangerous. It’s the… bite

Is that a saying?

It is now.

Oh, god. Dean wincing when he says snakes are cool, watching Jack decide which cake to open, I’m dead. Jack finally chooses the angel food cake, and Dean sighs with relief.

They pull up to a familiar-looking house - it’s Donatello’s house! Jack doesn’t understand why their field trip was to come here. “With this whole soul thing,” Dean says, “we’re worried about you. And when it comes to souls, or not having them, Donny here’s an expert.” Well, I guess that’s true. I mean, there’s another person who knows a lot about not having a soul, someone who lives a lot closer than Donatello does, but sure. Go ahead. Go see your expert. Donatello leads Jack inside, while Dean says he’ll stay outside and keep an eye on the snake. Which means slamming the roof of the car for some reason to see what it does, and then moving as far away from the open window as he can. (Sidebar: who else expected Felix to escape and be roaming around inside the Impala?)

How to casually stay as far away as possible from the snake in the back of your car.

Inside, Donatello pours a couple of MASSIVE cups of coffee (seriously these are soup bowls, aren’t they?) He swirls cream into his coffee and it looks like the milky way, which inspires him to say being soulless feels like a galaxy. “A very large, black hole… inside, empty. I feel nothing.” But he tells Jack “Losing your soul doesn’t make you bad, it doesn’t make you anything. It’s an absence. Of pity, and empathy. Or humanity.”

Jack says he doesn’t feel <i>nothing,</i> but he also doesn’t feel the same. “Maybe I just don’t know what nothing feels like. Mostly I just don’t want Sam and Dean and Cas to worry.” (Yes, I do love that he listed Sam first. Shut up.) But he also feels like he needs some time to deal with this on his own, and being on his own is never an option; there’s always someone watching over his shoulder.

When I need to blend, I ask myself “what would Mr. Rogers do?”

Who’s Mr. Rogers?

The best man I know.

Sam and Dean are the best men I know.

So, ergo, whenever you don’t want them to worry, just think WWWD. What would the Winchesters do?

I can do that.

OH JACK. YOU SWEET BABY. You probably don’t want to do what the Winchesters would do, though. It never works out well.

Meeting adjourned. Jack goes to sit in the car, and Dean asks Donatello if he has a soul. “I suppose the first question we must ask ourselves is, what is a soul?” This gets the eyeroll it deserves. Donatello says he thinks Jack is okay, and Dean asks if he’s like him. “Oh, no. I’m a prophet of the Lord, but he’s… Jack’s probably the most powerful being in the universe. I mean, really, who knows what’s going on inside his head?”

Um, I don’t know, Donatello, but I do remember that when you first met him, you could tell he wasn’t evil. You could detect evil. Did you lose that ability, just like Cas lost his ability to check for a missing soul? {sigh}

In the car, Jack grins and waves like a sweet little nougat cinnamon roll. But the music, ah, the music is pretty ominous. Aftermath! Dean says it looks like the snake enjoyed the trip and Jack says "It's hard to say; he's very guarded." I don't know if we're supposed to think he's being literal, or if he's making a joke. Either way, I applaud it. Dean asks Jack if he's okay and he says "it was... illuminating." He then heads into his room with Felix just as Sam and Cas come in.

Dean asks about their trip, and Sam's annoyed that Cas told him about the cardigan and Foxy Cindy. Like, Sam, you KNOW Cas doesn't keep secrets. "He said you were really happy," says Dean, and oh, now I get it. Cas was worried about him. {sniff} Cas goes off to see Jack, and Dean and Sam have this conversation.

Really happy, huh?

I mean, I guess I WAS happy, but it wasn't real, you know?

Well, not a lot of happy going on around here.

... I hate this place right now. I hate it. Everywhere I look I see them. I see Maggie. I guess that's why I, uh, was so desperate to get out of here. Why I kept running us ragged. But I gotta stop that. I can't keep running, I... this is my home. This is our home. Dean, I think I just need some time.

Okay.

OH GOD SAM'S FACE. When he breaks down and admits he hates it here, and when Dean pats him on the shoulder, and when he looks up, teary-eyed, and takes a deep breath, I CAN'T. I know this is the moment of angst we always expect at the end of a funny episode but this one is TOO MUCH. And how is it that we've had so much good emotional Sam this season? WHAT HAVE WE DONE TO DESERVE THIS??? I appreciate that they're making the death of the hunters Sam's trauma. It should upset Mary and Jack too, since they lived with them longer. But Sam feels responsible for them. He's the reason they're in our world. He told them they'd be safer here, and now they're dead.

Back in his room, Jack picks up his snake. "Cas says you miss your friend. You need help. Sam and Dean would help you, so I'll help you. I'll help you see your friend again. In Heaven." As Cas watches from the doorway, Jack does the glowy eyes and the SNAKE TURNS TO DUST AND NO, NO JACK, THIS IS NOT WHAT SAM AND DEAN WOULD DO, NOT AT ALL.

Well, that was a rollercoaster. The funny parts were wonderful, the sad parts were heartbreaking, the ominous parts were horrifying. Can we talk about Sam being so desperate to get out of the bunker, and so vulnerable to anything that feels like happiness, and Justin!Sam's frantic insistence that he is happy and wants to stay happy? About Dean's cake test? About Cas actually carrying much of a storyline and being not only watchable, but enjoyable? About what the ACTUAL FUCK is going on with Jack?

And yes, the stupid parts were stupid, and the unexplained parts were inexplicable. I've chosen to handwave them. What did you guys think?

Please help me stay unspoiled; thanks!

#spn #tv recaps #recap #spoilers #14.15 #peace of mind

[rruffian]

pt. 5

“what did the reviews say?” — “ehh, don’t ask”

i just read them, and they’re all sanctimonious. this is par for the course, and i can easily let them slide, but i wouldn’t want to be in P&C’s shoes, whether or not they ignore the reviews or read them, as per their music hall comedy routine. how thick a hide do you have to grow to survive this uniformly testy critical response year in year out? i had to go back and watch this thing of beauty (and loyalty) just to cleanse the palate.

i thought the friday show i saw was pitch perfect, frankly, the same way i thought Anthems For Doomed Youth was perfect, considering the circumstances. maybe it takes a very specific balance of expectations and stakes, because it’s not like i’m a blind fanatic (though i am relatively new to this), but i genuinely don’t see what my sons have ever done wrong, musically. at this junction it was absolutely the right call to go “unplugged,” unsure as they were about it. i’m sorry but if a band has a back catalogue full of 24 carat gold tunes, and not many bands of the 00s indie explosion do, you have no business judging them for revisiting it and saying an acoustic setting makes no sense. i guess being a latecomer i never did see them as sweaty scuzzy punks, never witnessed the ugly tabloid circus first-hand, so i can’t conceptualize them as these badass danger boys, like this vid does, for instance. i love me some noise, i find the garage rock sound very charming actually, but surely it’s not their roughness that defined them? what struck me right away, back in ‘17 when i first came across them, was the staggering beauty of the songs. it was almost ridiculous how soft and gentle some of the melodies were, how nimble the songwriting. words chasing notes across the measures, pretty rhymes, perfect crimes, perfect lines for love to bind. listening to everything i could get my hands on while reading up on the whole epic 20-year saga, i felt like i’d stuck my arm elbow-deep into ocean sludge and grasped around and pulled out a large handful of pearls.

these songs sounded as organic as they did arranged with the string quartet and trumpet and backing choir because in many cases, no major rearrangement was even necessary (hence carl choosing them, i presume). we’ve always had the bugle! waterloo, milkman and doomed youth were all epic ballads already, featuring the piano, the cello, and expansive backing vocals, respectively. for lovers already had that orchestral sweep, literally, and albion might as well have had it. katie with the classic 60s swagger, plan A with the sinister carnie brass band vibe, the good old days with the groovy jazzy verses, none of these reimaginings were exactly a stretch. even the surprising choices worked for me—the lush soul songstresses completely changed radio america around, and i won’t hear a word against cha cha waster, that tune would have been brilliant even as bossa nova.

i don’t get the accusations of sloppy performance either, sounded fairly tight to me? they can’t have had more than a couple of proper run-throughs, if not just the one on wednesday, which is nuts. i can’t imagine the nerves on the first night, bless their jittery souls.

finally, standing in stark contrast to that charisma vacuum of an opening act, bathed in on-the-nose heavenly backlight, these two are simply the shiniest frontmen i’ve seen in my many years of being dazzled by rock frontmanship. you know how when you listen to comedy bands for a while, all other music seems too self-serious for some time afterwards, or when you see a particularly energetic band live, everyone else seems lazy in comparison? well the deal with peetur and carlos is, they make the rest seem lackluster. milquetoast. the bar has been raised and from now on i will only accept no less than: laugh out loud funny, ridic antics, long complimentary reading list, mad vortex of interpersonal dramz with a happy ending, beautè, magnetismé, verve, fashun, naked emoshun, erotic mic shares, demonstrably life changing, manic pixie dreamness undermined hilariously by excruciating dad dweebness and weird uncle-ness later in life, and finally—good to fans. which is to say: i’m done being dazzled, no one will ever compare.

#ldn

[gaysparklepires]

17. So This Is What It Feels Like to Have Nothing Left

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I sort of had a plan as I ran to the Cullens’ garage. The second part of it was totaling the bloodsucker’s car on my way back.

So I was at a loss when I mashed the button on the keyless remote, and it was not his Volvo that beeped and flashed its lights for me. It was another car—a standout even in the long line of vehicles that were mostly all drool-worthy in their own ways.

Did he actually mean to give me the keys to an Aston Martin Vanquish, or was that an accident?

I didn’t pause to think about it, or if this would change that second part of my plan. I just threw myself into the silky leather seat and cranked the engine while my knees were still crunched up under the steering wheel. The sound of the motor’s purr might have made me moan another day, but right now it was all I could do to concentrate enough to put it in drive.

I found the seat release and shoved myself back as my foot rammed the pedal down. The car felt almost airborne as it leaped forward.

It only took seconds to race through the tight, winding drive. The car responded to me like my thoughts were steering rather than my hands. As I blew out of the green tunnel and onto the highway, I caught a fleeting glimpse of Liam’s gray face peering uneasily through the ferns.

For half a second, I wondered what he’d think, and then I tried not to care.

I turned south, because I had no patience today for ferries or traffic or anything else that meant I might have to lift my foot off the pedal.

In a sick way, it was my lucky day. If by lucky you meant taking a well-traveled highway at two hundred without so much as seeing one cop, even in the thirty-mile-an- hour speed-trap towns. What a letdown. A little chase action might have been nice, not to mention that the license plate info would bring the heat down on the leech. Sure, he’d buy his way out of it, but it might have been just a little inconvenient for him.

The only sign of surveillance I came across was just a hint of dark brown fur flitting through the woods, running parallel to me for a few miles on the south side of Forks. Quil, it looked like. He must have seen me, too, because he disappeared after a minute without raising an alarm. Again, I almost wondered what his story would be before I remembered that I didn’t care.

I raced around the long U-shaped highway, heading for the biggest city I could find. That was the first part of my plan.

It seemed to take forever, probably because I was still on the razor blades, but it actually didn’t even take two hours before I was driving north into the undefined sprawl that was part Tacoma and part Seattle. I slowed down then, because I really wasn’t trying to kill any innocent bystanders.

I didn’t really have a plan. But my conversation with Liam was replaying in my head over and over, with sprinkles of Beau and Edward’s conversation just to add some more pain to the mix. Liam had the right idea, after all. So did Beau. I had to move on.

But how do you do that? How do you just move on? Would it be like in movies where you catch someone’s eye in a crowd and the whole world slows down and stops, till it’s just the two of you? That’s probably what it was like for Beau and his vampire. Didn’t I deserve that, too?

So how do you look for a random soul mate in a crowd? Well, first I needed a crowd. So I tooled around, looking for a likely spot. I passed a couple of malls, which probably wouldn’t been pretty good places to find someone my age, but I couldn’t make myself stop. Like part of me knew this was stupid.

I kept going north, and it got more and more crowded. Eventually, I found a big park full of kids and families and skateboards and bikes and kites and picnics and the whole bit. I hadn’t noticed till now—it was a nice day. Sun and all that. People were out celebrating the blue sky.

I parked across two handicapped spots—just begging for a ticket—and joined the crowd.

I walked around for what felt like hours. Long enough that the sun changed sides in the sky. I stared into the face of every guy who passed anywhere near me, making myself really look, noticing who was good looking and who had brown eyes and who looked good in braces and who had way too much gel in their hair. I tried to find something interesting about each face, so that I would know for sure that I’d really tried. Things like: This one had a really straight nose; that one should pull his hair out of his eyes; this one could model if the rest of his face was as perfect as his smile…

Sometimes they stared back. Sometimes they looked nervous—like they were thinking, Who is this big freak glaring at me? Sometimes I thought they looked kind of interested, but maybe that was just my ego running wild.

Either way, nothing. Even when I met the eyes of the guy who was—no contest—the hottest guy in the park and probably in the city, and he stared right back with a speculation that looked like interest, I felt nothing. Just the same desperate drive to find a way out of the pain.

As time went on, I started noticing all the wrong things. Beau things. This one’s hair was the same color. That one’s eyes were sort of shaped the same. This one’s cheekbones cut across his face in just the same way. That one had the same little crease between his eyes—which made me wonder what he was worrying about.

That was when I gave up. Because it was beyond stupid to think that I had picked exactly the right place and time and I was going to simply walk into my soul mate just because I was so desperate to. That’s not how real life worked. Not how my life worked.

I wandered back to the car and then slumped against the hood and played with the keys.

Maybe I was just meant to be what I was. I sad, bitter, lone wolf. In the most pathetically literal sense. Maybe my life was just a big, cruel joke, and there was no escape from the punch line.

“Hey, you okay? Hello? You there, with the stolen car.”

It took me a second to realize that the voice was talking to me, and then another second to decide to raise my head.

A familiar-looking guy was staring at me, his expression kind of anxious. I knew why I recognized his face—I’d already catalogued this one. Light red-gold hair, fair skin, a few gold-colored freckles sprinkled across his cheeks and nose, and eyes the color of cinnamon.

“If you’re feeling that remorseful over boosting the car,” he said, smiling so that a dimple popped out in his chin, “you could always turn yourself in.”

“It’s borrowed, not stolen,” I snapped. My voice sounded horrible—like I’d been crying or something. Embarrassing.

“Sure, that’ll hold up in court.”

I glowered. “You need something?”

“Not really. I was kidding about the car, you know. It’s just that... you look really upset about something. Oh, hey, I’m Lucas.” He held out his hand.

I looked at it until he let it fall.

“Anyway...,” he said awkwardly, “I was just wondering if I could help. Seemed like you were looking for someone before.” He gestured toward the park and shrugged.

“Yeah.”

He waited.

I sighed. “I don’t need any help. He’s not here.”

“Oh. Sorry.”

“Me, too,” I muttered.

I looked at the guy again. Lucas. He was good looking. Nice enough to try to help a grouchy stranger who must seem nuts. Why couldn’t he be the one? Why did everything have to be so freaking complicated? Nice guy, good looking, and sort of funny. Why not?

“This is a beautiful car,” he said. “It’s really a shame they’re not making them anymore. I mean, the Vantage’s body styling is gorgeous, too, but there’s just something about the Vanquish. . . .”

Nice guy who knew cars. Wow. I stared at his face harder, wishing I knew how to make it work. C’mon, Jake—make the world stop already

“How’s it drive?” he asked.

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” I told him.

He grinned his one-dimple smile, clearly pleased to have dragged a halfway civil response out of me, and I gave him a reluctant smile back.

But his smile did nothing about the sharp, cutting blades that raked up and down my body. No matter how much I wanted it to, my life was not going to come together like that.

I wasn’t in that healthier place where Liam was headed. I wasn’t going to be able to fall in love like a normal person. Not when I was bleeding over someone else. Maybe—if it was ten years from now and Beau’s heart was long dead and I’d hauled myself through the whole grieving process and come out in one piece again—maybe then I could offer Lucas a ride in a fast car and talk makes and models and get to know something about him and see if I liked him as a person. But that wasn’t going to happen now.

Magic wasn’t going to save me. I was just going to have to take the torture like a man. Suck it up.

Lucas waited, maybe hoping I was going to offer him that ride. Or maybe not.

“I’d better get this car back to the guy I borrowed it from,” I muttered.

He smiled again. “Glad to hear you’re going straight.”

“Yeah, you convinced me.”

He watched me get in the car, still sort of concerned. I probably looked like someone who was about to drive off a cliff. Which maybe I would’ve, if that kind of move’d work for a werewolf. He waved once, his eyes trailing after the car.

At first, I drove more sanely on the way back. I wasn’t in a rush. I didn’t want to go where I was going. Back to that house, back to that forest. Back to the pain I’d run from. Back to being absolutely alone with it.

Okay, that was melodramatic. I wouldn’t be all alone, but that was a bad thing. Liam and Seth would have to suffer with me. I was glad Seth wouldn’t have to suffer long. Kid didn’t deserve to have his peace of mind ruined. Liam didn’t, either, but at least it was something he understood. Nothing new about pain for Liam.

I sighed big as I thought about what Liam wanted from me, because I knew now that he was going to get it. I was still wary about the whole thing, but I couldn’t ignore the fact that I could make his life easier. And—now that I knew him better—I thought he would probably do this for me, if our positions were reversed.

It would be interesting, at the very least, and strange, too, to have Liam as a companion —as a friend. We were going to get under each other’s skin a lot, that was for sure. He wouldn’t be one to let me wallow, but I thought that was a good thing. I’d probably need someone to kick my butt now and then. But when it came right down to it, he was really the only friend who had any chance of understanding what I was going through now.

I thought of the hunt this morning, and how close our minds had been for that one moment in time. It hadn’t been a bad thing. Different. A little scary, a little awkward. But also nice in a weird way.

I didn’t have to be all alone.

And I knew Liam was strong enough to face with me the months that were coming. Months and years. It made me tired to think about it. I felt like I was staring out across an ocean that I was going to have to swim from shore to shore before I could rest again.

So much time coming, and then so little time before it started. Before I was flung into that ocean. Three and a half more days, and here I was, wasting that little bit of time I had.

I started driving too fast again.

I saw Sam and Jared, one on either side of the road like sentinels, as I raced up the road toward Forks. They were well hidden in the thick branches, but I was expecting them, and I knew what to look for. I nodded as I blew past them, not bothering to wonder what they made of my day trip.

I nodded to Liam and Seth, too, as I cruised up the Cullens’ driveway. It was starting to get dark, and the clouds were thick on this side of the sound, but I saw their eyes glitter in the glow of the headlights. I would explain to them later. There’d be plenty of time for that.

It was a surprise to find Edward waiting for me in the garage. I hadn’t seen him away from Beau in days. I could tell from his face that nothing bad had happened to him. In fact, he looked more peaceful than before. My stomach tightened as I remembered the conversation that had given him that peace.

It was too bad that—with all my brooding—I’d forgotten to wreck the car. Oh well. I probably wouldn’t have been able to stand hurting this car, anyway. Maybe he’d guessed as much, and that’s why he’d lent it to me in the first place.

“A few things, Jacob,” he said as soon as I cut the engine.

I took a deep breath and held it for a minute. Then, slowly, I got out of the car and threw the keys to him.

“Thanks for the loan,” I said sourly. Apparently, it would have to be repaid. “What do you want now?”

“Firstly... I know how averse you are to using your authority with your pack, but . . .”

I blinked, astonished that he would even dream of starting in on this one. “What?”

“If you can’t or won’t control Liam, then I—”

“Liam?” I interrupted, speaking through my teeth. “What happened?”

Edward’s face was hard. “He came up to see why you’d left so abruptly. I tried to explain. I suppose it might not have come out right.”

“What did he do?”

“He phased to his human form and—”

“Really?” I interrupted again, shocked this time. I couldn’t process that. Liam letting his guard down right in the mouth of the enemy’s lair?

“He wanted to... speak to Beau.”

“To Beau?”

Edward got all hissy then. “I won’t let Beau be upset like that again. I don’t care how justified Liam thinks he is! I didn’t hurt him—of course I wouldn’t—but I’ll throw him out of the house if it happens again. I’ll launch him right across the river—”

“Hold on. What did he say?” None of this was making any sense.

Edward took a deep breath, composing himself. “Liam was unnecessarily harsh. I’m not going to pretend that you didn’t hear what Beau said. You know Beau only cares about you and your happiness, and he suffers a great deal over your pain. What Liam said was uncalled for. At least what I heard—after a a few minutes of Liam’s tirade, Beau demanded that everyone else leave the room—out of hearing range. They talked for a long while alone, even though it was completely against my better judgement. Anyway, Beau’s been crying—”

“Wait—Liam was yelling at Beau about me?”

He nodded one sharp nod. “You were quite vehemently championed.”

Whoa. “I didn’t ask Liam to do that.”

“I know.”

I rolled my eyes. Of course he knew. He knew everything.

But that was really something about Liam. Who would have believed it? Liam walking into the bloodsuckers’ place human to complain about how I was being treated.

“I can’t promise to control Liam,” I told him. “I won’t do that. But I’ll talk to him, okay? And I don’t think there’ll be a repeat. Liam’s not one to hold back, so he probably got it all off his chest today.”

“I would say so.”

“Anyway, I’ll talk to Beau about it, too. He doesn’t need to feel bad. This one’s on me.”

“I already told him that.”

“Of course you did. Is he okay?”

“He’s sleeping now. Roy is with him.”

“And what about…” I trailed off.

“He’s… better in some ways. Aside from Liam’s tirade and the resulting guilt.”

Better. Because Edward finally understood why Beau had put off changing and everything was all lovey-dovey now because Edward knew that Beau only loved him. Fantastic.

“It’s a bit more than that,” he murmured. “He seems more… resolved. He feels—we feel—there’s no point in delaying any further.”

I stared at Edward, feeling the pain hit me all over again.

Edward went on, acting like he couldn’t hear the screaming inside my brain. “As soon as Carlisle returns—”

“They’re not back?” I cut in sharply. I thought of Sam and Jared, watching the road. Would they get curious as to what was going on?

“Alice and Jasper are. Carlisle sent all the blood he was able to acquire, so as to relieve you from donation duties, but it wasn’t as much as he was hoping for. Carlisle stayed to try another source. I don’t think that’s necessary now, but he wants to be covered for any eventuality.”

“When you say it isn’t necessary?”

I could tell he was watching and listening to my reaction carefully as he explained. “Beau decided, once Carlisle returns, if his heart is strong enough… He’s going to change.”

“What?”

“I… I’m sorry, Jacob. I know this is…” He paused, and I could see my pain in his face. “I don’t know how you are handling it, to be honest with you. Please, understand, Beau is too fragile to delay. The damage this disease has done to his body is… Even if he survived and stayed human a little longer, as he had originally wanted, he would never truly recover. He wouldn’t be able to do any of the things he wanted. No, if his heart is strong enough then it’s time.”

I kept getting my legs knocked out from under me. First, hearing Beau put everything out black and white on the table. Now, I’d realized that I thought of those four days as a sure thing. I’d banked on them.

The endless ocean of grief that waited stretched out before me.

I tried to catch my breath.

Edward waited. I stared at his face while I recovered, recognizing another change there.

“You think he’s going to make it,” I whispered.

“Yes. He’s still in stable condition from the last transfusion of your blood. Which means we should act. But that also means there’s something else I need to talk to you about.”

I couldn’t say anything. After a minute, he went on.

“Yes,” he said again. “Beau is as stable as he’s probably going to get. We discussed everything thoroughly, even brought Royal in for his… opinion. Even Royal agrees, Beau has done everything he can do. It’s time. We just need Carlisle’s help to make it as smooth and easy as we can.”

“When will Carlisle be back?” I asked, still whispering. I hadn’t got my breath back yet.

“By noon tomorrow.”

My knees buckled. I had to grab the car to hold myself up. Edward reached out like he was offering support, but then he thought better of it and dropped his hands.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I truly am sorry for the pain this causes you, Jacob. Though you hate me, I must admit that I don’t feel the same way about you. I think of you as, a… a brother in many ways. A comrade in arms, at the very least. I regret your suffering more than you realize. But Beau isgoing to survive”—when he said that his voice was fierce, even violent—“and I know that’s what really matters to you.”

He was probably right. It was hard to tell. My head was spinning.

“So I hate to do this now, while you’re already dealing with too much, but, clearly, there is little time. I have one last thing to ask of you, Jacob Black—beg you, if I must.”

“I don’t have anything left,” I choked out.

He lifted his hand again, as if to put it on my shoulder, but then let it drop like before and sighed.

“I know how much you have given,” he said quietly. “But this is something you do have, and only you. I’m asking this of the true Alpha, Jacob. I’m asking this of Ephraim’s heir.”

I was way past being able to respond.

“I want your permission to deviate from what we agreed to in our treaty with Ephraim. I want you to grant us an exception. I want your permission to save Beau’s life. You know I’ll do it anyway, but I don’t want to break faith with you if there is any way to avoid it. We never intended to go back on our word, and we don’t do it lightly now. I want your understanding, Jacob, because you know exactly why we do this. I want the alliance between our families to survive when this is over. This is what Beau needed, why he waited.”

I tried to swallow. Sam, I thought. It’s Sam you want.

“No. Sam’s authority is assumed. It belongs to you. You’ll never take it from him, but

no one can rightfully agree to what I’m asking except for you.”

It’s not my decision.

“It is, Jacob, and you know it. Your word on this will condemn us or absolve us. Only you can give this to me.”

I can’t think. I don’t know.

“We don’t have much time.” He glanced back toward the house.

No, there was no time. My few days had become a few hours.

I don’t know. Let me think. Just give me a minute here, okay?

“Yes.”

I started walking to the house, and he followed. Crazy how easy it was, walking through the dark with a vampire right beside me. It didn’t feel unsafe, or even uncomfortable, really. It felt like walking next to anybody. Well, anybody who smelled bad.

There was a movement in the brush at the edge of the big lawn, and then a low whimper. Seth shrugged through the ferns and loped over to us.

“Hey, kid,” I muttered.

He dipped his head, and I patted his shoulder.

“S’all cool,” I lied. “I’ll tell you about it later. Sorry to take off on you like that.”

He grinned at me.

“Hey, tell your brother to back off now, okay? Enough.”

Seth nodded once.

I shoved against his shoulder this time. “Get back to work. I’ll spell you in a bit.”

Seth leaned against me, shoving back, and then he galloped into the trees.

“He has one of the purest, sincerest, kindest minds I’ve ever heard,” Edward murmured when he was out of sight. “You’re lucky to have his thoughts to share.”

“I know that,” I grunted.

We started toward the house, and both of our heads snapped up when we heard the sound of some coughing. Edward was in a hurry then. He darted up the porch stairs and was gone.

“Beau, love, I thought you were sleeping,” I heard him say. “I’m sorry, I wouldn’t have left.”

“Don’t worry, Edward. I rolled over on my wrist—it’s still sore and it woke me up. But I’m fine.”

I walked through the door.

Alice said, “Finally,” and Beau’s eyes flashed to me. That sad smile appeared on the corner of his lips for only a second. Then it faltered, and his face fell. He snapped his eyes close and clenched his jaw, like he was trying not to cry.

I wanted to punch Liam right in his stupid mouth.

“Hey, babe,” I said quickly. “How ya doing?”

“I’m fine,” he said.

“Big day today, huh? Lots of big decisions.”

“You don’t have to do that, Jacob.”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, going to sit on the arm of the sofa by his head. Edward had the floor there already.

He gave me a reproachful look, that quickly moved to deep regret. “I’m so s—” he started to say.

I pinched his lips together between my thumb and finger.

“Jake,” he mumbled, trying to pull my hand away. His attempt was so weak it was hard to believe that he was really trying.

I shook my head. “You can talk when you’re not being stupid.”

“Fine, I won’t say it,” it sounded like he mumbled.

I pulled my hand away.

“Sorry!” he finished quickly, as a grin teased at the corners of his mouth.

I rolled my eyes and then smiled back at him.

When I stared into his eyes, I saw everything that I’d been looking for in the park.

Tomorrow, he’d be someone else. But still alive, and that was what counted, right? He’d look at me with the same eyes, sort of. Smile with the same lips, almost. He’d still know me better than anyone who didn’t have full access to the inside of my head.

Liam might be an interesting companion, maybe even a true friend—someone who would stand up for me. But he wasn’t my bestfriend the way Beau was. Aside from the impossible, unrequited love I felt for Beau, there was also that other bond, and it ran bone deep.

And that connection was more important to me than anything else.

Tomorrow he’d be my enemy. Or he’d be my ally. And, apparently, that distinction was up to me.

I sighed.

Fine! I thought, giving up the very last I had to give. It made me feel hollow. Go ahead. Save him. As Ephraim’s heir, you have my permission, my word, that this will not violate the treaty. The others will just have to blame me. You were right—they can’t deny that it’s my right to agree to this.

“Thank you.” Edward’s whisper was low enough that Beau didn’t hear anything. But the words were so fervent that, from the corner of my eye, I saw the other vampires turning to stare.

“So,” Beau asked, working to be casual. “How was your day?”

“Great. Went for a drive. Hung out in the park.”

“Sounds nice.”

“Sure, sure.”

After a long moment, he huffed a sigh. “Roy?” he asked.

I heard Blondie chuckle. “Again?”

“I think I’ve drunk like two gallons of water in the last hour,” Beau explained.

Edward and I both got out of the way while Royal came to lift Beau from the couch and take him to the bathroom.

“Can I walk?” Beau asked. “My legs are so stiff.”

“Are you sure?” Edward asked.

“Royal will catch me if I collapse from sudden exhaustion.” He deadpanned.

Royal set Beau carefully on his feet, keeping his hands right at Beau’s shoulders. Beau stretched his arms out in front of him, wincing a little.

“That feels good,” he sighed. “Other than the sore ribs.” He took a deep breath and let out another long sigh. “One more day…”

I couldn’t help the pain that shot through me in a sudden, stabbing burst, but I tried to keep it off my face. I could hide it for one more day, right?

“All right,” He started, then he twisted out from Royal’s arms to face me, “Oh, Jake, can we talk when I get back? Please? Just some stuff I want… to… to…”

His face contorted in a strange, pained way. His right hand jumped to his left arm, and he was suddenly covered in a sheen of sweat. He gasped and stumbled backwards.

“His heart—Edward his heart!” Alice screamed.

I could hear it too, his heart was beating erratically, wildly

All of us rushed forward, but we were a second too late. Beau’s back hit the arm of the sofa at an odd angle and there was sickening cracking sound. He bounced off the sofa arm, and fell, his knees making a similar cracking sound as they hit the floor.

Edward caught his head before it also hit the floor.

Beau’s gasping cut off into a sickening, wet, gurgling noise.

“Beau? Beau?” Edward asked, and then his eyes unfocused, and panic shot across his features.

A half second later, Beau screamed.

It was not just a scream, it was a blood-curdling shriek of agony. The horrifying sound cut off with a gurgle, and his eyes rolled back into his head. His body twitched, arched in Edward’s arms, and then Beau vomited a fountain of blood.

#Breaking Dawn #Breaking Dawn Revamped #Breaking Dawn rewrite #The Twilight Saga #The Twilight Saga Revamped #The Twilight Saga Rewrite #Twilight Saga gay #Jacob Black #Edward Cullen #Beau Swan #Beau Cullen #Alice Cullen #Royal Hale

[dorigvbcorvis]

THE MILLSTONE

I once heard that there was a cut scene or scripted but not filmed scene in Glee's Goodbye episode (S3E22) that was between Schue and Kurt...I thought anything done would be a retcon because Schue has done a disservice to all choir members not named Rachel or Finn so this little story came to mind. This is not a prequel to my Song to a Siren (AO3) story but has a lot of the same feelings.

Story Summary: The last day of school and Kurt has to unpack years of baggage  before he can literally move on.  Takes place post NYADA rejection letter.

The Millstone

The 2012 school year was over and the last of a programed system of school bells had concluded. Blaine stood in the doorway to the choir room looking at Kurt.  Most days he enjoyed watching Kurt; his boyfriend's slim frame, the stylish clothes Kurt liked to pick out to wear, or how some of those choices showed off his cotch bulge a little too nicely.  Some days it was the way his pale skin seemed to give off its own light...and ah those blue eyes - What Blaine didn't like was finding Kurt like this; frozen in place with a scrolled letter held tightly against his chest.  It was an easy guess to know what the letter said and this wasn't good news. 

Blaine felt he had to say something, he just needed to rustle up the nerve. "Coming?" He asked, finally breaking the silence - his had buried his hands deep inside his pockets for added security: he had no  idea how Kurt would reply or even if he would.

To his surprise Kurt managed to squeak out a mild toned answer. "Yeah, in just a..." Only that this was all that came out - Kurt couldn't finish his sentence and he remained frozen in the same spot where he had been for over an hour.

In Kurt's  mind he imagined that he could take off in any direction and run forever yet he also pictured that he would be only two steps into that run before he would face plant and crumble into pieces - Why couldnt he be more like Finn?  He took not getting into Pace with ease.  Maybe it was Kurt wanted it more.  Maybe it was just that he came to believe it was assured; Madame Tibideaux did like him;  didn't she?

Finn and Rachel had long since left the choir room  - Exactly how long ago Kurt wasn't sure.  He was stuck; as if being in the choir room he would be able to somehow undo the opening of his NYADA letter and maybe then he could go back to feeling how his highly praised audition would be his ticket out of Lima.  But with the rejection letter out of its envelope the apistevist in Kurt could not escape the reality of the facts.  *We regret to inform you* The words were now permanently etched in his mind.  He felt like he did on the morning that Schue & Miss Pillsbury called him out of his French III Class to tell him about his dad.  Yet for all the emotional parallels he now saw - it remained a mystery why the tears had not yet come.  He was stuck; weighted down by everything that had come before.

Kurt wanted to cry - He wanted to scream actually -He wanted to belt it to the school's rafters like one his lung bursting D6s.  This was not how it was supposed to go.   His boyfriend wasn't offering much in the way of concrete help - clearly he must have some idea of what happened or how badly he felt  - Instead he was making some random comment about Breadsticks.

"We should hurry," Blaine said. "They always run out of French-Fried Ice cream if you are not there to order it..."

Blaine immediately thought to walk this all back.  It wasn't that he was an unsympathetic guy - Quite the contrary,  he knew deeply and inexplicably Kurt was his soul mate.  He had simply heard that come rain or shine Breadsticks was where they all would go after they had opened their letters.  Blaine being Blaine this was where his stomach took over.

Now Blaine was a smart guy.  He figured out from Kurt's immobility, ashen face, and his wide eyed stare -  That this was textbook shock.  What he didnt know was what to do about it.  He knew doting on Kurt wasn't an answer - Kurt wasn't a touchy feelie kind of guy.  Likewise  he knew abandoning Kurt was not an option either - It was an impass where it seemed the best plan of action meant waiting for Kurt to make the first move -  but somehow Blaine knew that this couldn't be right. He decided he had to ask

"Kurt, damn, I know it sucks right now - I know it doesn't at all seem fair - what I need to know what I can do to help you."

Kurt answered the question with one of his own   "What didn't I do right?" he said..he needed to know why.

"You said that they only take 20 - maybe you like #21 and only just missed the cut off"

Kurt found this simultaneously the most reassuring thing he could hear and the most upsetting - To be that close.  But this did not explain Rachel.  He could be happy for her if he wasn't so pissed off about it.

"Rachel fucked up and got in - I didn't - Aiso it may cime as a shock but I have done more community theatre than she has." (*Note* It's implied in Mattress/Sectionals and there is also an 'Into the Woods' cast photo on Kurt's season 3 bookshelf)

"Really?" Blaine didn't doubt this but to listen to Rachel it seemed incorrect.

"Yeah, the music director at the playhouse also runs the Sound of Music Sing Along."

"Acting chops," Blaine said with a nod. "explains why you killed it as 'Krupke."

A single tear manage to fall now as Kurt began to recall a memory. "I was a regular until my Freshman year..."

"What happened - If you don't mind me asking?"

"High School jocks happened - They started harassing me first at school - then one day they followed me home.  They put flaming bags of dog shit on my porch hoping that I would stamp out the fire."

Blaine grimaced in full-on disgust. "Eww!"

"After that incident t-they" Kurt started now to whimper.  "tought it would be funny to nailed all our lawn furniture to the roof and then graffitied the garage with slurs.  I really thought they'd quit after the garage but the next day at school they threw pee balloons at me... after that came the dumpsters.  Then I dropped everything that mattered to me...I made a studio out of my basement so I could at least still perform.  I thought I got my confidence back in glee...but this little reminder [Kurt held up his rolled up letter] tells me it was all for naught"

Blaine couldn't hold back not embracing his boyfriend.   He tentatively placed his hands on his boyfriend's shoulders and not meeting any resistance from this he enveloped Kurt holding him up because  in this moment Kurt indeed started to crumble and break away from his mental snair in this moment too came the sobbing. "Breadsticks can wait...I don't think we should go, and I for sure not going to let you torture yourself being anywhere near..." Blaine stopped short of saying Rachel.  "You are the one who is important here - All this time I thought it was only Karoski...it wasnt it was this school."

Long time they just stood there in the choir room until only soft sobs remained.  They would have held their embrace longer if they wasn't so coldly interupted.

"Ah guys?" Schue's interruption came like the critical stop of a bird flying into a window. He had entered the choir room from his side office. "What's going on here?" he continued in a tone that was both surprised as it was accusatory  "And do I have to remind you about McKinley PDA Policy?"

"Come on Mr. Schue show some sympathy here." Blaine growled.  He wondered if the end of the school year meant Mr. Schuester somehow reverted back to some other form - One where he was now a jerk who didn't have to pretend to be Mr. Nice Guy - "Look, the policy is wrong, everyone knows it isn't enforced fairly and," Blaine made it a point to stress  "Sometime slack is warranted."

"I did cut you some slack - this was my classroom.  But after tonight this room will be The Adult Literacy Room for the duration of summer - I won't have any control over that.  I am here only looking out for you guys."

"Right and a hug is still just a hug Mr. Schue" Blaine turned to Kurt to reassure him. "Are you alright?  It's Schue"

"I  know," Kurt said, glaring at his teacher. 

Despite the clock on the wall Mr. Schuester looked at his watch for the time: 7 minutes to 5 "What are you doing in here this late anyways?"

"Mr. Schue now is not the time...really it isn't"

Kurt had stopped sobbing but now it was taking all his might not to turn hostile.  He is gritting his teeth and clinching his fists and this like most things he did in the choir room went unnoticed.

"What's really going on here?" Schuester asked rephrasing his question into a demand.

Blaine continued to speak up for Kurt. "Even if I were in a position to say anything, which I am not - you wouldn't understand - it's best that you just stay out of it and we'll be out of your hair soon enough."

Kurt was never more in love with Blaine for stepping in talking to Schue this way   But Kurt also knew Schuester all too well; unless you were kissing his ass or one of his favorites he was never easily won over.

As always Mr. Schuester  misread what he saw in Kurt. "I never took you for the sentlemental Kurt, but good for you -but I still will be wanting to close up.  I am heading to breadsticks with Emma - We just heard the great news Rachel was accepted to NYADA - I actually thought you guys would be there to cheer her on."

"Mr. Scheu!?" Blaine exclaimed. "Are you really this insensitive?!"

Kurt gave Mr. Schue one of his classic demon stares, a look that if looks could kill the choir director would be a pile of ash...Many knew Kurt didn't have much to say to his teacher - But many did not know his reason - It was something Kurt purposely kept it to himself.  Right now, if someone were to ask he gladly open both barrels and without hesitation tell how he had so little respect for his teacher that he regarded Schuester as willfully ignorant, petty, and lacking the credentials that a good teacher should have....and worse; he was a man who played favorites and threw everybody else under a bus.   Kurt pleaded with himself that he would not start back up again with the water-works  - He didn't want that, not in front of Schue.

"Is this something I can help you with?" His teacher asked, still remarkably obvious.

"No, not really" Kurt said as bluntly as he could.

"This really is a job better suited for Miss Pillsbury" Blaine added, he had not fully parted from Kurt - He couldn't do that - "It's better that you just let me handle this."

"Whatever, but at Five I am closing my doors - I need you both gone by then."

Kurt finally felt a need to take on his teacher. "You really don't know when to quit do you?"

"Do you think I owe you something?"

Kurt gave a sad half sarcastic laughed.  "Like I could imagine you'd ever listen."

"I don't understand"

"Of course YOU dont understand.  You've always been Mr. Oblivious...The man who thinks everybody loves him...Want to know why you got teacher of the year?  Everybody so just damn grateful you stopped teaching Spanish and gave Mr. Martinez your job...He would have been handed the award only Mr. Figgens said he hadn't been here long enough."

Blaine bit his tongue to avoid laughing out loud...but it was what they all thought.  "Come on Kurt we should go - before you really say something you'll regret."

"Do 'you mean there's more?"

"Do you honestly want a full rebut?  How for nearly 3 years I have been a team player but now I have nothing to show from it  - My dad ran against Sue to save your job and still I got not a damn thing in return - No Instead I was ostracized - made to listened to the guys in here call me names, and I can't tell how old it gets being throw into a dumpster every single morning.

"The guys from this class did this? 

"Yeah, the name calling, the insults,  And I think the only reason Puck stopped throwing me into the parking lot dumpster is because one time I was in uniform and Coach Sue gave him an earful... but then you knew about the dumpter long before that.  If I had dollar for every time you walked passed pretending like everything was normal"

"Ah..." Mr. Schuester was uncharacteristically speechless.  He had always enjoyed being seen as the cool teacher in front of the Jocks.  He never thought he'd ever be called out by one of their victins.  He had bought into the belief the dweebs had it coming.

"I am not done here because there's the not so small matter of the promise you made but had no qualms about breaking it with me - You told *ALL* of us how we all would have a chance to shine."

"Come on, I let you sing plenty," the choir director was certain.

"Name one venue- I will save you the trouble there hasn't been one.  That's why NYADA rejected me - You never once featured me."

"I see you blame me for your rejection do you?"

"You had a part in it, yes - You made a promise - I was just a fool to believe you make it good. Instead the closest I got was being told the only way I would get a solo is if I shaved my legs, drop 20lbs, and wore a dress...all this while being told how much I was not being a team player for saying no...and by-the-way while we're on this subject what happened to that first solo? Huh? That great idea you had just before I left for Dalton - Or were you just blowing smoke up my ass?"

"No, I really did have an idea - It was a James Bond Medley - I wanted it for sectionals I thought you could sing The Spy Who Love Me - But then you transferred -  In retrospect I think that had we done that for Nationals that year we might have placed higher."

"In retrospect you should have just left me alone at Dalton - I would be going to Columbia but at least it would be going to New York."

"But didnt those guys at Dalton almost blinded Blaine." Schuester looked over at Blaine hoping for an ally but Kurt was quick to rebut.

"...And they would not have tried had we been still there - So your point is what exactly?  You make a good play about how you are all about team work and fairness but the truth is you play favorites - Maybe by that measture I should count myself lucky I wasn't yours."  Kurt turned on his heels and headed for the doorway. 

"Where are you going" Kurt's former teacher asked.

"Not to Breadsticks," Kurt said, he was finally free.

.

#fanfic #klaine #blaine and kurt #kurt hummel #glee #goodbye #s3e22

[acehotel]

INTERVIEW: Justin Strauss with Honey Dijon

Honey Dijon is a force of the highest order — brazen, idiosyncratic and sharp as nails, she arrived in New York City during the halcyon days of its club scene and became a beacon of light. Heralded for her cross-genre sets and unparalleled fashion intuition, Honey Dijon effortlessly moves from sculpting runway tracks to creating inclusive, dance-utopias in the club. Her first full-length album, The Best of Both Words, was put out by Classic Music Company to critical acclaim and she’s not stopping — ever. In this edition of Just/Talk, she talks to Ace friend and DJ hero Justin Strauss about being a piece of a revolutionary puzzle, eBay sweaters and the synthesis of art, music and being open to everything. 

Justin Strauss: Let's talk about what brought you to New York from Chicago.

Honey Dijon: What brought me to New York from Chicago was actually nightlife. When I was a teenager, we had a store called Wax Trax! Records and that's where I discovered The Face and i-D, Details and Interview Magazine, all of that stuff.

Justin: What year?

Honey: I'm not giving a year because that would be giving away my age, and we're not going to do that. Like Grace Jones says, it's about an energy.

Justin: We know some of those magazines first appeared in the 80s.

Honey: Yeah, they were the late 80s. So I was like a teenager then. I discovered that when I was about 12 or 13 in the late 80s, I just became completely fascinated with, you know, Stephen Saban’s article on nightlife and the Bill Cunningham photographs, and then I also discovered the early Paper magazines and they were documenting the whole downtown thing. And it was just everything that seemed so exciting, all these artists, musicians, fashion designers and creators, all exchanging information and collaborating. And so I always knew that I would end up in New York, just from these worlds that I would read about.

Justin: What was happening in Chicago?

Honey: The thing that people don't realize is that with early house culture, like most subcultures, people communicated with their clothing. And so if you were house, so to speak, you were really influenced by like a lot of European designers, stuff like Versace, Montana, Ferre, and the French designers like Montana and Gaultier. So actually I learned about fashion through house music, and because these were the clothes that people used to wear, and they used to also appropriate a lot of the lower east side new wave scene from New York as well.

All of these things were tied together. I never, ever separated anything. And so as a young kid growing up at the beginning of house music culture that was emulating the new wave sound from people that went to The Mudd Club and Hurrah, and Danceteria — which was also emulating the English synth bands at the time like Human League, Yaz and Heaven 17 — with the asymmetrical hair cuts and Spandau Ballet, part of the late new romantics. And just reading The NME , i-D, Face, BLITZ, Details and Interview magazines...all of this stuff was so connected, even if the music wasn't the same. It was all of these subcultures in bed with each other. I just always realized that. We had just gotten cable at the time and with “Style with Elsa Klensch” show, the Stephen Sprouse show at the Ritz, it was like someone had dropped a brick on me. It was like I had never seen anything like that. It blew my mind.

And then the Chicago Tribune, which I still have to this day, did this whole article on Stephen Sprouse and Teri Toye and Steven Meisel, and it's like a paper trail. You just keep digging and digging and then things just keep popping up. I knew when I could, I was going to live in New York. And that's what brought me here.

Justin: And had you been here before?

Honey: No, my mom used to work for TWA, and so on my sixteenth birthday, I made my dad take me to New York. I specifically remember, because my uncle used to be a tailor, and so we had all these GQ magazines from the late 70s, and 80s that I would look through and that's when I knew about Macy's, Charivari and Matsuda. I remember going to the store Parachute on Columbus Avenue.

So I'd been here as a teenager, but I had never been here as an adult until I basically moved here. And by that time everything was gone. I didn't move here until 98.

Justin: Were you disappointed?

Honey: No. I moved to DC before I moved to New York, so I used to take the bus up to New York because I was really good friends with Gant Johnson — Gant Johnson’s college roommate lived with Derrick Carter. When I look back at my life, everything fits into place. And so I met Gant Johnson at Rednail, which was the loft that Derrick Carter, Mark Farina, Chris Mazuka and G Most lived in. I was saying, "Oh, I'm moving to DC." And Gant was like, "Well, if you ever come to New York, you can stay with me." And I was really known as a dancer. I was a dancer before DJ, and so when I came to New York to visit Gant, Gant was really involved in the Lower Sast Side scene, the drag scene, at Crow Bar.

When I would come up I’d stay with him in his tiny walk-up on First Avenue and 13th Street, and he sort of just took me around and that's how I started to meet people. And it wasn't the New York that I read about, but it was still very vibrant. It was still pre-Internet, it was still pre-Guiliani. At that time you could go out seven nights a week in New York. So Mondays was Sugar Babies, Tuesdays was Jackie 60, Salon was on Wednesdays, Thursdays was Sound Factory Bar and Fridays was either Twilo or Tunnel, and then Sundays...I forget what was on Sundays. But I literally went out seven nights a week every fucking week. And that's just how New York was at the time. I mean, I didn't get to to Area, I didn't get to go to The Mudd Club, I didn't get to go to all those other places, but I still got to experience a part of New York that is not even here today.

Justin: And what were you doing to support yourself?

Honey: I was working in corporate America. I was managing the mental health benefits for the city of New York employees, for firemen and congressmen. If they needed mental health, their insurance would call and I would negotiate rates with their hospitals for inpatient and stuff. So I had a day job, but that's what I was doing when I left Chicago and moved to DC. I was working during the day, then I would come home and sleep for four hours, and then I would go out on every night.

Justin: And how did going out turn into DJing?

Honey: Well, I'd always bought records since I was a kid. I never threw away any records, and I loved house music because I grew up on house music.

Justin: Musically, what was going on when you were growing up?

Honey: My parents were really young when they had me, so there was always music. But I think growing up in Chicago, especially in a very typical, middle-class, African-American household, music is just on 24 hours a day, every day. Barbecues, dinner, when my mom was cooking, cleaning the house, going to the store, there was constant music. That's where my real music education was from, my parents. My second music education was Cable TV when we had a channel called MV60, and that's when I found about all the English bands and they would play all the early new wave videos. I guess the same stuff that they were playing at Danceteria, I was getting in my living room. Bow Wow Wow, and Scritti Politti, all the early stuff.

So everyone knows jacking, when people say “jack your body.” Before that they called it punking out. Punking out was basically emulating new wave culture from New York. And so it never seemed separate.

Justin: In New York we had The Mudd Club, we had Area, we had Danceteria — did you have clubs that kind of fused that all together?

Honey: Yeah, we had that. We had video bars and stuff like that. We had a club called Bistro One and Two, which was predominantly a teenage 18 and over gay club. It was predominantly white. I mean, as you know, Chicago was very segregated, but since I was already into going to Wax Trax! to buy records by Ministry and Front 242, I was a misfit, in a way. I've always been a misfit. I'm still a misfit. But we had industrial clubs because industrial music was quite big in Chicago, too.

This is why it's so funny for me. I just don't see a separation of anything. That's just how I grew up. And it's so funny, because I grew up in a really black and Latin neighborhood, and I was a misfit. Because I was a queer kid, I was already a misfit. So I found my community of misfits through music and culture.

Justin: When you started DJing, did your DJ sets reflect that diversity?

Honey: Yeah, and they still do. I think I just hone my craft all the while. Definitely how I grew up reflects my approach to music. Well, you ask me when did I start DJing in New York? It's so funny, when I moved here things were so separate, and they weren't separate in Chicago. If you were into soulful house music, you went to Shelter. If you wanted the more tribal, big room stuff, you went to Sound Factory.

Justin: It wasn't always like that.

Honey: Yeah, the gay white kids had all their Circut parties. I don't know if Danny Krivit’s 718 Sessions was around at that time, but people that were into what happened at the Garage and The Loft gravitated towards that party. I just thought, that's not how I experienced music, or was exposed to music. So I just literally started DJing. I'd always bought records. I had a huge record collection just from my love of music. I wanted to DJ because I was not seeing music presented in a way that I had experienced in Chicago, with which was no boundaries. What always amazes me about that is that you had inner city black kids that were so fearless and forward thinking about how they played music to other black kids, because these were marginalized people that were listening to a lot of European music. I found out about the B-52s from other black kids. I found out about all of this music from other black kids, you know?

I always think, does that still happen? Because everyone is so mono-vision right now. Everyone just has tunnel vision about what they like. And so I just started DJing out of necessity of wanting to experience music how I experienced it.

Justin: And where were you playing in New York?

Honey: My very first DJ gig was on Eldridge Street at a place called bOb, that I used to do on Monday nights. I used to call it Chicago House. I got paid 60 bucks a night to DJ for five hours. When I go and DJ somewhere for two hours, I'm like, "You know, in New York, if you were the DJ for the night, you played from beginning to end."

Justin: Well, I do know that.

Honey: I mean that's just the culture of New York, and that's how I learned how to DJ.

Justin: It was really hard for me when that whole thing changed, and then I had to play for two hours. I didn't know how to do it.

Honey: I still don't know how to do it.

Justin: I was like, "Oh, This doesn't make sense." There's no time to build up to something.

Honey: To breathe, or let the music breathe, or connect to the crowd, or set up a vibe.

Justin: I mean I figured it out , but it took a while to really feel comfortable doing that.

Honey: I don't like it.

Justin: It's nice to see there are a few places now letting DJs play the whole night again. In New York, I was DJing at The Mudd Club, and then some friends took me to the Paradise Garage and that changed my whole life and what DJing meant, and I finally understood what this all means. Did you go to the Warehouse in Chicago or was there a club or DJ that made you feel like that?

Honey: I was too young for the Warehouse, but I did have a fake ID. I did get to go hear Ron Hardy once, and I used to hear Frankie Knuckles at different places around the city. But my education, really, in the craft of DJing came from Derrick Carter. Just being in the Loft and seeing him. He used to work at Gramophone Records and when you're a kid, the way kids used to make money, was to make mix tapes and sell them at the store. So I would be around while he made mix tapes. He was really the one that showed me what DJing could be. Him and Mark Farina. Derrick Carter was so fearless back then. I mean he still is amazing. I still have a lot of respect for him, but just beat juggling, and phasing records, and acapellas, and different genres together to make something new, taking a pop vocal and putting it over a techno record. We didn't have names for it. It was just this is what they did.

My second education was when I moved to New York and became really good friends with Danny Tenaglia and seeing him go from playing at Gag on Tuesdays at Sound Factory Bar, to when he blew up into the legend that he is, after he'd just moved back from Miami. And I used to see him play at Twilo, just the theater of presenting music, the drama, the space, the sonics and the tension that he builds. And it was a whole different education for me. And then my other education was at the Body & Soul party, how Joe Clausel manipulated the EQ, and how eclectic Francois K. was, and then Danny Krivit bringing more of a heritage soul vibe with a disco element to it, how just all of these different things sonically worked in the course of a night. And also seeing Victor Calderone, and Peter Rauhoffer play at the Roxy. I was able to see a lot of people DJing in a lot of different environments and different ways, and that was my education that I still carry with me today.

Justin: And the DJ world today, there are so many DJs.

Honey: Everyone would like to say they're a DJ.

Justin: Yeah, well. DJs getting paid incredible fees.

Honey: Millions of dollars.

Justin: Who are "DJs" and have never played a whole night.

Honey: Or to a gay audience, or to a black audience. I remember the first time I played at 718 Sessions, and I literally had all of these people that... There's nothing shadier than when you have a bunch of black queens staring at you with their arms crossed, waiting for you to entertain them, that have been around, that know their musical history. Once you can pass that test, I feel like you can sort of DJ, because these people aren't on drugs. They're very serious about their music, dancing, expressing, and the spirituality in music. But having said that, DJing has gone, and our culture has gone, from a community of marginalized people regardless of race, sexual orientation, economic status, social standing, to a middle-class form of entertainment. And so DJs now are marketable. It's no longer about what music you play... it's just different.

Justin: How would you describe your role as DJ?

Honey: To challenge, educate and entertain.

Justin: You know when people come up to you, "Can you play...do you have?" I'm like, "No. This is not what this is about." They don't get it.

Honey: I feel that a certain generation of people look at DJs as a form of entertainment. You're there for their entertainment and so they feel entitled, especially if they don't have a culture of clubbing and DJing.

Justin: That's an issue.

Honey: They think we're a jukebox.

I'm just going to put this out here, it's normally white women of privilege that are the ones that feel entitled to go to the booth and demand that you play something.

Justin: Shove their phone in your face.

Honey: I've even had people say, "Oh, can you play from my iPod."

Justin: We've all had that.

Honey: It's even harder for me when you do fashion events, because when you're there, they really look at you as you're no different than the busboy or the caterer. I recently did a fashion event and five different women came up to me and asked me to play five different requests that were all from the corporate office. And at a certain point, I just said, "Look, can I just do my job?"

Justin: I think there’s a disconnect. A lot of kids who are into this today have never been to a club. They go to festivals. It's a show.

Honey: And they read blogs, they look at YouTube. And this is a thing, too. I also have to say no. When I listen to a lot of electronic music today, I'm just like, "You've never really danced," because there's no swing and I can just tell the difference between people really experiencing music in a community of people that are there for the same reason.

Justin: I'm all about new music, and there's lots of great stuff being released. So much in fact. It's just filtering through the good and bad, it’s finding the stuff that you connect with, because it's there.

Honey: That's true. You just have to work a bit harder now because I think there were always horrible records, but we didn't have the Internet, and we didn't have the technology that made everyone a producer as well.

Justin: But we had DJs that we would go hear and we trusted his taste, and he would turn us on to new records.That's where you heard music first.

Honey: And record stores.

Justin: Yes! You'd hang out there. "Hey, did you get this?" You had Wax Trax! And Gramaphone in Chicago, we had Vinylmania and others in New York.

Honey: It was the same thing. When I moved to New York and there was Eightball Records, there was Satellite Records.

I remember, literally, you would take a day and go to all the shops. You would have to take a day just to go record shopping because you went to so many different places.

Justin: And the person selling the records knew you and your taste because you shopped there all the time..

Honey: I was always turned on just by hanging out at the record store. I would be at Satellite Records and someone will play record, and I was like, "Oh my God. What is that?" "Oh, it's in the progressive house section." I'm like, "But that's not progressive house." Or then someone will be playing something like, "What record is that?" "Oh, it's in the trance section." I'm like, "Huh?" And that's what I loved about community of DJs is that sometimes you would go and hear things that you never would look for. And I miss that.

Justin: You had an amazing year. You've become an icon.

Honey: Oh, yeah, it doesn't feel like it.

Justin: It's true. And you've worked your very hard to get there. Well deserved.

Honey: Most people forget that this has been a lifelong thing.

Justin: I know that.

Honey: But thank you for saying that. I'm glad, though, that it happened to me at an age where I'm better able to understand what's happening. I feel now that the pressure is really on, because now there's expectations.

Justin: Right. It's like when no one knows who you are, you're like, "Oh, wow. Who are you?"

Honey: There's a sense of freedom, and now I have to live up to what that last DJ set or the last record.

Justin: Do you get nervous before you play?

Honey: I don't get nervous anymore before I play. I'll tell you why. Certain places I get nervous before I play, but my nervousness comes from wanting to do well. Just always wanting to just be my best, and to challenge myself to be better. It doesn't come from me worrying about the crowd, but it just comes from me challenging myself to be better because I still feel like I'm learning. Sometimes I fuck up mixes. Sometimes I feel like I could have EQed this better, or the flow could have been better. I'm always very, very critical of my work. But for so many years people said no. For so many years record labels didn't take my music. For so many years people considered me a gay DJ, so straight venues or festivals weren't booking me. The gays weren't booking me either because I wasn't playing circuit music or pop remixes. So that sort of trained me to really be confident in what I do musically, and it's nice that all of these things are happening to me, but I still feel no different than when people were saying I was shit, or I wasn't good.

I think the only thing that I'm enjoying about success is that I'm able to finally say I'm a DJ, that I make a living as a DJ, and that I don't have to worry about what my next two months of gigs are going to look like or calling my agent, “why am I not being booked.” And there's still places that I want to play that aren't booking me, there's still things that I want to do...

The funny thing about what's happening, is that just now my name is higher up on the bill. It's the same clubs, the same people. It's just now my name placement is different. And so I look at it very much like that. And it's nice that I make a little bit more scratch, and my name's higher on the bill, but it's the same shit.

Justin: And how does being transgender come into play in the DJ world?

Honey: It is my life, but I think there's just been a lack of conversation about diversity in our culture for so long. I think we've plateaued with just straight white men running the show, musically, culturally, artistically. And I think one of the great things about social media is that it's given a lot of different people a lot of different voices. It's not just a trans thing, but women, women of color, queer women, queer people, gender nonconforming people, non-binary people, now have avenues to have their voice heard and not have someone filter that voice. I have to say, I don't live my life as a professional trans person.

I find it's the least interesting thing about me. I know that people are interested in that part of it, but if I wasn't who I was, I wouldn't have been exposed to music the way I have been. I came up at a time when that music was specifically black, gay, Latin and queer. And if I wasn't queer, I wouldn't have been able to hear music presented in that way in those environments. So my marginalization has actually benefited me in a lot of ways, and now, having a platform to be able to talk about what that's been like and give voices to those people, it's not about me anymore. I really feel like I'm just carrying and giving visibility to the people that have always been there and have always done this shit.

Justin: You're here to carry on the tradition.

Honey: I'm a piece of the puzzle. I mean I'm not so egotistical that I think that I'm the only one, or anything, but I'm a piece of the puzzle. I mean, when Frankie Knuckles died, to me that was the last black, gay DJ. We only really have one left, which is Derrick Carter, just still carrying on that information from that time.

I'm supposed to curate a lineup soon of DJs, queer people playing disco, and I couldn't think of anyone that really has the experience of presenting disco in that way because the club culture that nourished that is gone globally. Those rooms and those energies are gone globally. So it informs my work, but it doesn't define it.

But there's likely less than 20 people. It's a very small pool. And as far as a trans artist is concerned, I don't know of anyone else that just comes from what I come from. So I feel like it's important for me to play how I play, to play the music that I play, because if I don't do it, it won't get out there. A lot of people don't like it. A lot of people like it.

Justin: Well, obviously a lot of people are liking it now.

Honey: Well, more people are hearing about it, so it's nice. But again, I'm just a piece of the puzzle.

Justin: And let's talk about fashion and music, because I grew up with that, and for me that goes hand-in-hand.

Honey: Of course.

Justin: They inspire each other, and like you I live in a house full of magazines and books, and it's influenced my music, my productions. But fashion, like music, has became part of mainstream culture.

Honey: It was more elitist back then.

Justin: Now, like DJing, everyone's a fashion expert.

Honey: Well, now you don't even have to know the craft or design as long as you have surface and visuals, social media presence, celebrity.

Justin: I mean your social media is very focused on fashion, as well as the things that inspired you, that still do inspire you.

Honey: Sometimes I feel that I'm at odds with my social media. Like, "Why am I always posting old shit?" Do you know what I mean? And sometimes I have a problem with that. It's very fashion-focused, but it's music-focused, too. It's heritage music focused. I think I post a lot of that stuff because, to me, they're forgotten sources of inspiration and a lot of people appropriate that work without giving respect to the source. But I'm so envious that you lived in a time when it was the apex of fashion art and music, everyone slept in bed together.

And you really had to have a talent to be even considered. And to me, that doesn't exist anymore. I think fashion has become so commercial and corporatized now. When I do a lot of fashion events it's like DJing a wedding. They want familiar things, and if I play anything with a 4/4 kick drum, even if it's a disco record, they associate that with techno and they have no idea what the fuck techno is. So even though I love clothing, I love fashion, whenever I got into it, I was like, "Who did the hair? Who did the makeup? Who took the picture? Who styled the photo, the composition, the model?" So for me it was more about image making. I was so obsessed with Jean-Paul Goude, and it was just about art and image making. There was always this fine line and a crossover between the two.

Even my favorite bands, what they looked like was just as important as the cover art and what they sounded like. I never, ever separated any of those things, so I try to do that as an artist. I try to be a 360 with art and the use of fashion. I love clothing. I don't love it as much as I used to because I feel like what's happened in fashion has become so democratized and also so corporatized, now there's no soul to what's happening. I wouldn't say there's no soul for me. I don't want to speak for others because someone else they might feel differently. But we're just living in a different time. We didn't have social media back then. We didn't have the Internet back then, and so you actually had to have a point-of-view. You had to research, you had to dig, you had to find a like-minded community of people that felt the same way about these things, instead of just logging on or just scrolling on your phone, having all this information there.

I find that when you find something, when I would discover a designer or something that no one knew about, it just sort of was like a badge of honor for me because it felt like my thing. It felt like I was creating my own thing for me, and it wasn't about someone giving it 100 likes or someone wanting to brand it, or make money from it. It was just my self-expression. I found it, I nurtured it, I let it evolve and that was my thing. And then you met other people that did their thing, and then you came together and created this new thing out of your own thing. And now everyone has access to the same looks, the same designers, so everyone's just basically recycling the same shit that everyone else is doing.

Justin: So how do you stand out and be an individual today? How do you deal with being a misfit today?

Honey: I think being a misfit today is easier. It's easier to be a misfit because of social media. You don't need a magazine editor or the record label to say, "Yes, this is good." You can just do your own thing. So I think there's a great amount of freedom in being a misfit today. However, everyone being different is actually everyone being the same.

I had to go out to Brooklyn yesterday and I took the bus, because I had to go to IKEA, and I saw this kid on the bus who was such an amalgamation of so many different things. He was a Latin kid with gold fronts, but two ponytail poofs, grills, tattoos all over his neck, baggy clothes, but then a beeper. Then he had on a plastic back rave backpack. And I just thought, wow. I don't think he knew how many different things he had mixed together. He had a beeper.

I just thought, wow, he's like cyber punk, but punk, but then hip hop, but then drug dealer. It felt really fresh to me. He wasn't styled. It was a bit rough. It was raw. But I felt something.

Justin: It's funny because you just see everyone looking the same these days. You get on the subway car and half the car is wearing whatever the goose jacket is. It's a uniform, they all want to look the same. When I was a kid, I just didn't want to look like just anybody else.

Honey: Well, I buy a lot of stuff on eBay now, just because I've been finding old Parachute clothes and old Kansai Yamamoto sweaters. I always liked clothing that was associated with cultural movements and expressions. I think why I love dressing so much like the 70s is because it reminds me of when people dressed up to go get laid and go out to get drugs, made an effort to go dancing. Dressed up to go out.

Now everyone dresses to get their photograph on Instagram or a style blog. There was a really good article recently about how all of these girls, and these style blog stars, they're basically given fashion by corporate companies. It's just a different way of advertising. Most of the people that are photographed are thin, white women that these companies are trying to sell to other thin, white women. You have to go out to Red Hook, or Brooklyn, the Bronx, Queens, just to find more real street-style. And these kids are just living their lives — I find that so refreshing.

Justin: Is anything in musically inspiring you right now?

Honey: I feel like as a house music DJ, a lot of my music is percussion-based, and there's not a lot of melody. I mean, there is dance music that is made that way, but I've been listening to a lot of Alice Coltrane, Carole King, Phoebe Snow. Just going back and listening to the music that had great lyrical content and reflected on the political landscapes of the times. Especially in our political climate now, there's a lack of music that is consciousness music. So I've been sort of turned on by that.

And there's a few techno producers that I like. There's this kid called Wbeeza who's from Peckham, which is like the Brooklyn of London. I love his stuff. There's another producer from London called Loan, I love his stuff. Most of the stuff, for me, is still European. I miss the days when we had a New York sound. The last DJ or producer that came out of New York that I liked was Galcher Lustwerk.

Justin: He's great.

Honey: I like his stuff. He's really cool.

Justin: Yeah, I heard his stuff, and I didn't know him, and I just wrote him a message on SoundCloud one day, and I said, "You don't know me. I don't know you. But I'm a big fan of your music." And he wrote me back and we connected.

Honey: One of my songs on my album was inspired by him and I wanted him to do the vocals, but it just never happened.

Justin: That's the one of the best  things about the Internet. That people can connect with you who have been touched in some way by your work.

Honey:  Even connecting with older artists — I don't like that word. Heritage artists. I became friends with the Dj Bruce Forest that way, through social media. And people like you, and I've been able to connect to things that I love. I don't like to live in the past, but I like to take inspiration from that time.

Justin: Yeah, I'm all about that.

Honey: Because I don't believe in a timeline. If you look at physics, the past, the present and the future all exist on the same plane. So I just look at music and art like that. I can still look at a Gustav Clement photo, as well as a Mapplethorpe, as well as something that's happening today, and it all still feels the same to me. I don't separate them. And just like I can listen to 1920s swing music, I can listen to 70s rock, I can listen to what's happening today. All of it informs to everything for me. I just think if you're an artistic person, it all feeds the source.

#just/talk #justin strauss #nyc #ace hotel #ace hotel new york #honey dijon #honey dijon dj #yes #interview #lgbqtia #DJ #music #queer culture #just talk

[weirdwariii]

My Top 20 Albums of 2017 Part 2: 10 - 1

10. Alvvays - Antisocialites: What a delightful album. Like, I should just leave it at that, because I’m not sure what else I want to say about it. This is just the kind of indie pop-rock album that felt plentiful and unavoidable 10 years ago, but doesn’t show up as much anymore. But I don’t think its noteworthy just because it’s filling a niche. It’s just an effortlessly tight album. It sounds good, the vocals are great, the songs are amazing. There’s hints of some interesting inspirations sprinkled throughout (someone was listening to Stereolab…), and I just can’t get enough of it. I wouldn’t be surprised if, in the longrun, this album has some more longevity than most of the other albums on this list.

9. Thundercat - Drunk: Let me start here: I picked up this album on vinyl this year, and it’s one of the coolest looking packages to come out this year; great cover art, lots of art inside, and...the album spread across three 10” discs. To get through the album on vinyl you need the steadfastness to flip three different discs after each side, and to put away each disc and replace it with the next at least twice. That’s a lot of commitment for any album, and the very thought of listening to this album on vinyl exhausts me (considering that my turntable is located on the opposite side of the room from my couch). With that said, I’m pleased to announce that I love this album, despite its presentation. I feel like this is the third year in a row that Thundercat has felt like an important part of important music (see also: To Pimp a Butterfly, You’re Dead! and The Epic), and its good to see that its own name on the cover of his work this year. This is an album that feels uniquely his, and somehow makes a song about watching anime in Japan seem as much of an artistic accomplishment as making the best yacht rock song in 30 years with the help of Michael McDonald and Kenny Loggins. The entire album is an equal parts quirky and soulful trip and hints that future albums could be even quirkier and more soulful. Just, like, listen to it digitally.

8. Rolling Blackout Coastal Fever - French Press EP: So what does this say: For a 6-song EP, these songs must be exceptional if it was better than all those other albums? Or that, as an EP, there’s less of a chance to be bored with it by the end? Well, for what it's worth, this is the only EP on the list, so it clearly did something right. Honestly, if this was at LP length and was 10 songs at the same quality as the 6 presented here, this would probably rank even higher. As is, this is just a breezy and effortless set of indie rock songs from a new band that sounds like they’ve been around 10 years longer than they really have. There isn’t a moment that goes to waste, and I’m always left wanting more at the end - a quality that even some of my favorite albums this year didn’t have. I sincerely hope there’s a full length on the horizon, and that it makes good on the promises hinted at here.

7. Oh Sees - Orc: Sometimes there’s just the perfect album at the perfect time. Maybe its a band that you’re finally getting into as they put out a new album, or maybe it's an album that just seems to mesh with the kind of music you’ve been into lately. Maybe it's an album that just resonates with how you’re feeling in that moment.  Sometimes it's all of the above, as was the case here. I finally got into Thee Oh Sees last year, absorbing their two albums in my quest for more music that was in the same vein as Ty Segall’s Emotional Mugger. Between these albums, and King Gizzard’s 2017 output (we’ll come back to that), I was 100% on board the fuzzed out psych-garage-punk bandwagon, and that's when this album fell into my lap. I just love everything about this album. It’s raw, it’s weird, it’s loud, it has the most epic drum solo I’ve heard all year on it. My garage-rock sensibilities were spoiled silly this year, and this album played a huge part in that.

6. Japandroids - Near to the Wild Heart of Life: I read a review earlier this year for this album, and I’m kind of paraphrasing from memory, but it essentially said: “In a trying year like 2017, you’d think a band like Japandroids would have more to say on that, rather than making more fun punk music.” And that literally made me love the album even more. The best response to the darkness of our world, as it turns out, was to remind you of what it looks when you make it to the light at the end of the tunnel. The band doesn’t necessarily do anything they haven’t done before - there are few risks or moments that would sound completely out of place on an earlier album. But they really are great fucking songs. The title track is, hands down, the best song that was released this year. Yeah, maybe this didn’t call our orange meat puppet a buffoon or anything, but it sure as hell will be playing on my headphones on the day that we wave goodbye.

5. Washed Out - Mister Mellow: As we approached the end of 2016 and with the mostly unknown, but likely dark, void of 2017 looming ahead, I vowed to make art more important in my life. It needed to be an escape just as much as a response. And when I felt overwhelmed by the news cycle, or when the inspiration I needed just wasn’t there, Mister Mellow was. Between the “visual album” aspect of this project (that I strongly urge you to check out) and the music itself, it completely fit in with my aesthetic as artist and never failed in giving me a little pep talk. It's not a long album, nor is it an especially deep one. But in terms of style and just being a pool of strangeness to get lost in, this album never let me down. It might not be an explicit reaction to 2017 in itself, but it definitely aided me in creating my own.

4.Tyler the Creator - Flower Boy (or probably, Scum Fuck Flower Boy): The genesis of Odd Future was a weird time for me as an aging fan of music. On one hand, here was this collective of talented young rappers churning out a near-constant stream of albums for free - a concept that was novel and exciting to follow. On the other, between fast-paced Twitter stream-of-thought and community in-jokes, Odd Future definitely felt like the exact moment that I felt like I was an old man who didn’t get what the kids were listening to. And through that, I followed Tyler from afar. He’s a funny guy who you’ve been able to watch mature, year by year, to someone who feels very much like a spokesperson for a generation (am I crazy for thinking this??). This album feels like his most personal, self-aware, and world-aware album in his career, and there’s a quality in the production and the songs worthy of that awareness.  I recognize the lack of hip hop music in my list this year, and that’s a very fair observation. My only excuse (and it is just an excuse) is that Flower Boy was just that hard to beat, for me.  I listened to this album a lot this year, and I found myself relating to some of Tyler’s own personal revelations.  

3. Father John Misty - Pure Comedy: Earlier this year, speaking to a friend of mine about this album, I was voicing my displeasure: “The album is just far too long and says far too much. I just feel like I’ll never have the energy to slog through the whole damn thing.” But, again, 2017. The world needed protest music, or at the very least, music that seemed to understand the world we now lived in. So I slogged through Pure Comedy and...it wasn’t a slog at all. Okay, sure. It’s long. It takes its time. But Josh Tillman GETS it. Its a bad, and darkly amusing, world out there, and he’s here to let loose about it. The album only got better through the year, with every single listen. Even the 13 minute “Leaving LA” centerpiece feels wholey essential, acting as almost an origin story for FJM as much as it's a state-of-the-union on Josh’s personal life. This album didn’t just grow on me this year, it came to feel absolutely essential.

2. King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard - Flying Microtonal Banana, Murder of the Universe, Sketches of Brunswick East, Polygondwanaland: Not only did it not seem right to pick just one album of the 4 (at the time of my writing this) albums released by KG&TLW this year, but it felt like there was a larger picture here that needed to be recognized. King Gizzard promised 5 albums this year, and of the 4 we got, not a single one disappointed. Not a single one felt like a weak link to me. Not a single one felt like a misstep or seemed inessential. In a year where albums from some of my favorite bands bounced off of me after a listen or two (sorry, Grizzly Bear), this one band somehow made 4 albums that I cared about and kept coming back to. Flying Microtonal Banana and Murder of the Universe were both instantly loveable. They feel right into the same psych-rock wormhole that Oh Sees had me traveling through - especially the latter, with its story-driven sections and spoken words just hit the spot in every way possible. Sketches didn’t resonate with me at first, admittedly, perhaps because of its vast difference in sound from Murder - but I came around on it quickly, and its jazz-leaning pop would actually become the second most listened to of the 4 albums (with Murder being 1st). Polygondwanaland, finally, felt like a singles compilation - a complete set of tracks that, while feeling a little disconnected from each other thematically, shows off everything the band is capable of as well as hinting at what could be on the horizon. I honestly can’t say enough good things about this band, nor can I recall the last time that a band’s entire aesthetic just resonated with me so much. And to bring such a great quantity of music (with equal amount quality) to the table was just...perfect.  Or, y’know, close to perfect. Because these albums are only #2 on the list.

1.  Priests - Nothing Feels Natural: Nothing Feels Natural was one of the first (if not the actual first) albums I fell in love with in 2017, and it felt like the album that all others would be measured against. And, for the most part, this album always felt like the best. There were times when other albums felt more important in a moment (Murder of the Universe and Flower Boy both immediately come to mind), but when the buzz wore off a little, I was always happy to come back to Nothing Feels Natural. Here, Priests nail both a cohesive sound, yet its done through an assortment of genres. The surf-rock of “JJ” (another contender for year’s best song), the spoken word punk of “No Big Bang” and the new wave of “Suck” all seem to be at contrast with each other on paper, but the entire album flows together effortlessly. The band is tight as hell, and for as much as I want to call them “punk” there just isn’t a lot of the discordant noise I’d associate with that label on this album. There’s a Spoon-esque attention to production on this album - everything feels planned and well thought-out and there’s barely any wasted moments. Musically, I think the album holds its own against almost any other that I’ve listened to this year. Yet, I don’t even think its the music that even puts it here in the top spot - that’d be the lyrics. You’re probably as sick of hearing about the influence 2017’s politics had on music as I am sick of writing about it, so I’ll try and condense it a little...but you get the idea. For songs written prior to the year, they certainly hit all the right spots for the issues that mattered in 2017: Identity. Feminism. Consumerism. Culture. Even if it would’ve been the right album at any time, it still felt especially poignant this year, and the fact that it sounds so great only propelled it the very top.

And that’s it. That was my favorite music of this year. All done. The end. Onwards to whatever black hole of despair 2018 will be.

#weirdwariii2017eoy #music #music list #king gizzard #priests #tyler the creator #father john misty #japandroids #alvvays #rolling blackouts coastal fever #thundercat #washed out #thee oh sees