#horrible thought popped up in my head right about now what if she is also dead but is staying alive via puppet magic | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

circle-with-me · 3 months

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the way you bend, the way you break

Pairing: Joakim Jolly Karlsson x OFC (Violet)

Content Warning/Tags: ⚠️18+MDNI!! daddy!jolly, mild degradation, vaginal fingering, oral sex (female and male receiving), unprotected vaginal sex, squirting, use of restraints, overstimulation, light choking, praise kink if you squint. Some fluffy af aftercare. Seriously, Jolly is the king of aftercare.

Word Count: 4.4k

Tag list: @concretenoah @deathblacksmoke @ladyveronikawrites @malice-ov-mercy @sitkowski @nerdraging4point0 @tearfallpixie @foliosriot @collective-heartbreak @cookiesupplier @cind6547 @meekahy @lacktoesandtoddlerants @jilliemiw86 @sammyjoeee @blackveilomens @thisbicc

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The doorbell rings and Jolly looks up from his book confused. He wasn’t expecting any visitors today. He sits the book on the coffee table and pads to the front door peeking out the small window beside it. A short, raven-haired woman stands outside with her arms folded against her chest bouncing on the balls of her feet. Jolly smiles as he unlocks the door and opens it.

“If it isn’t my favorite flower.” He announces, grinning at his guest.

Violet rolls her eyes. “This flower is fucking freezing, are you going to let me in, or not?”

Jolly laughs and steps aside, allowing his friend to enter his home. Violet takes her jacket off and hangs it up by the door. She slips her shoes off and walks straight into the kitchen, leaving Jolly behind her.

When he makes it to the kitchen, she’s already rummaging through his refrigerator. He hears a bottle clinking and she pulls out two beers. Popping off the tops she hops up onto the counter and takes a drink, sighing.

It wasn’t uncommon for Violet to show up like this. They’d been friends for a few years now and spent many nights together drinking and eating junk food on his couch. They had consoled each other during breakups and life problems in general. Unannounced visits were not uncommon.

However, he knew something was wrong immediately.

Maybe it’s the way she chews on her bottom lip. Or how she fidgets while she rambles on about how horrible traffic was on the way to his house. The small talk was an indicator in itself something was wrong, but then he notices she’s barely opened her beer and she’s already peeling the label off it.

“What’s wrong, Vi?” Jolly interrupts her.

Violet whips her head over to look at him. She looks down at the beer bottle in her hand, resuming her task of destroying the label and shakes her head.

“Nothing. Why do you ask?”

He leans back against the counter across from her and crosses his arms.

“Because you’ve been here for five minutes and you’ve nearly chewed your lip off. Not to mention you think I give a shit about traffic?” Jolly raises his eyebrows at her in amusement and she huffs a laugh.

“Also, that poor beer bottle. Give it a break, won’t you?”

Violet groans and sets the beer bottle beside her. “You know, it’s really fucking annoying having you as a friend sometimes. You’re so observant.”

Jolly chuckles. “Tell me, my flower. What is it?”

“I have a favor to ask you… but it’s a big favor. I mean, a huge favor.”

“Go on.” Jolly says, taking a swig of his beer.

Violet sighs, straightening her posture.

“I want you to fuck me.”

Jolly chokes on his beer, coughing and nearly spitting it everywhere. He wipes his mouth off and looks up at her. He searches her face for a sign she’s joking. This is a prank, right? She’s just messing with him.

What he sees instead is a look of pure sincerity with a hint of embarrassment and shame. He realizes that she is, in fact, not joking and she was rambling because she was nervous to ask him. It occurs to him that he just made things infinitely worse with his reaction and he decides he needs to do damage control.

“Sorry, went down the wrong way.” He clears his throat. “Um.” Jolly closes his eyes to process her request, trying to ignore how his cock was already twitching at the thought. He flounders for a second longer and finally gathers himself.

“I am completely flattered. Believe me, but.. you could literally go out and pick any man you want. Why me?”

“God, trust me, I’ve tried.” Violet says, rolling her eyes. Jolly ignores the feeling of jealousy that starts to creep up inside of him. “I’m just not.. getting what I need, Jolly. Do you know what I’m saying?”

Jolly definitely can’t ignore the twitching in his pants this time. He swallows and nods because that’s all he can manage at the moment. His best friend is telling him that she thinks he can fuck her better than all of the other guys that she’s been with. The thought has his head swimming and he struggles to not grab her and fuck her on his kitchen counter.

“And you think I can?” He says, a little higher pitched than he intended.

“I know you can. Remember that night we got really drunk and started talking about our kinks? You told me how you loved taking control, giving your partners multiple orgasms..” She pauses, her cheeks flushing. “Degrading them a little, if that’s what they want.”

“Is that what you want?”

Violet nods, chewing on her lip. “Yes. Very much so.”

“Are you sure about this, Vi?” Jolly questions, stepping closer to his friend. He towers over her even as she sits perched on his kitchen counter. Their size difference has never crossed his mind before but suddenly it is all he can think about.

“Please, Jolls.” Violet begs as she scoots closer to the edge of the counter. She opens her legs for him and he steps in between them. “I need this more than anything and if I can’t trust you then who can I trust?”

Jolly begins to speak but is cut off by her warm hand running up his chest. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, his hands gripping the counters on either side of her legs. When he opens his eyes, her bright green ones stare back at him and he folds.

“You can always trust me.” He breathes, eyes flickering to her lips. She leans in to kiss him but he pulls back slightly. “Just know that once we start this…” He pauses briefly and places his hand around her jaw, squeezing. “I won’t stop until you’re fucked so dumb you can’t even speak.”

Violet’s breath hitches. Jolly feels her thighs squeeze against his and he smirks. “I’m ready..” She breathes and he lets her pull him in by his shirt, their lips ghosting over each other. “Please don’t make me beg you again.”

Their lips meet as he grabs the back of her head, closing the distance between them. A sharp pain shoots through Jolly’s lip as she bites into him, a metallic taste following. He growls and jerks her closer to him, their hips slotting together.

He meets Violet’s movements as she grinds on him. The way she clings to him and pants so heavily into his mouth makes Jolly realize she was serious — she did need this. He scoops her up and carries her to his bedroom.

They leave a trail of clothes on their way down the hall. By the time he gets her on his bed he’s swirling his tongue around her nipple and working her leggings off with one hand as he cups her other breast with his free one.

“Before we get started,” Jolly begins, his own gasp cuts him off as Violet pushes her hand into his sweats and wraps her hand around his cock. “I want to—god, hang on..” Jolly reluctantly pries her hand off of him and sits back on his heels. She raises up on her elbows, a confused look on her face.

“Are you having second thoughts?” She questions.

Jolly’s eyes widen and he shakes his head. “No, God no.” He watches her as she relaxes. “I just want to make sure you understand the traffic light system. I don’t want there to be any confusion or..”

Violet raises up and puts a finger to his lips, effectively shutting him up.

“Green means keep going. Yellow means slow down. Red means something’s wrong and we need to stop. Right?”

Jolly nods and she smiles at him.

“Perfect. Now…” She palms his hardened erection through his sweats. “I believe you promised to fuck me dumb. Or are we going to sit here and chat all night?”

Jolly chuckles humorlessly, and cups her face in his hand, rubbing her bottom lip with his thumb.

“Watch it, my flower.” He presses a soft kiss to her lips. “Or I’ll fuck that pretty mouth of yours and leave you to fend for yourself.”

“I-I’m sorry. P-please don’t.” Violet shudders against his lips. Jolly kisses her deeply, licking into her mouth and enjoying the taste of her. He runs his large hands up her thighs and she keens. In one quick motion he grabs both thighs and yanks her down so that she’s lying flat on her back. Violet yelps, clasping a hand over her mouth.

Jolly gets off the bed, walking across the room to search through his drawers. He pulls out a red silk tie and wraps it around his hand as he walks back to the bed. He grabs Violet's hands and wraps the tie around them, raising her arms and securing them to the headboard above her.

He makes sure it’s tight enough to keep her secure but not so tight it’ll cut into her skin and then crawls on top of her.

“I wasn’t planning on tying you up but you decided to get mouthy. Be good for me and I’ll untie you, okay?”

Violet makes a noise in agreement but that doesn’t satisfy him.

“I need your words, baby.”

“Yes.”

“Good girl.” He pats her leg, removing her panties and discarding them off to the side. Crossing this boundary with his best friend wasn’t ever in his plans, but Jolly would be lying to himself if he said he hasn’t thought about this moment before. Nothing could have prepared him for what he was seeing though.

Jolly licks his lips, the sight of her wet pussy making his mouth water. He sticks his thumb in his mouth to wet it and presses it gently against her clit, rubbing softly. Violet moans, arching off the bed. She really was touch starved. If the slightest touch gave her that reaction, he couldn’t wait to get his mouth on her.

He applies more pressure and picks up his pace, captivated by the way her pussy clenches around nothing. He lies down between her legs and lays his head on her thigh, placing kisses on her soft skin and watching her writhe under his touch.

As Jolly watches her become wetter by the second, he decides he can’t wait any longer. He replaces his thumb with his tongue and moans into her the second he tastes her. Violet bucks her hips into his mouth and he grabs ahold of them to steady her.

“Need to get you ready for me.” He says, sucking her clit into his mouth. They make eye contact as she looks down at him and he presses a single finger inside of her. Once again, she bucks her hips in response and he places his free arm on top of her waist to hold her down.

Jolly notices how tight she squeezes him and he groans loudly, his cock aching in his pants. He ruts into the bed for some relief. He pumps his finger into her, focusing on the spongy spot inside of her. Once she gives him the okay he inserts a second.

Violet’s breaths pick up and Jolly can tell she’s about to cum. She begs him so beautifully to let her move some so he obliges, letting her grind on his face until she orgasms. Jolly keeps greedily enjoying his meal until she’s begging again, this time it’s for him to stop because she’s so sensitive.

Jolly sits up and wipes his mouth off, licking his fingers clean. Violet watches him as he does this, whimpering softly. She looks down at the bulge in his sweats, noticing the small wet spot that has formed. She licks her lips and pulls at her restraints.

Jolly looks down and smirks, laughing softly.

“You want it, baby?”

“God, yes. Please.” Violet whines and nods quickly.

He stands up off the bed and shoves his sweats and boxers down, his cock springing free. Violet’s eyes go wide as she sees his size, and she licks her lips again. Jolly crawls back onto the bed and in between her legs. He kisses her stomach and up to her chest.

Jolly hooks his arm under her knee and pushes her leg up. He uses his other hand to stroke his cock and places it at her entrance.

“Tell me you want it.” He says, ghosting his lips over hers. “Tell me you want my cock.”

“I want your cock.” Violet mewls chasing after his lips. He pushes the tip in and she gasps, the stretch already overwhelming her.

“Say it again”

“I- mmm… I..” She stumbles over her words. Jolly pulls out of her, and she nearly cries.

“I said, say it again.” He says through gritted teeth.

“Fuck, fuck, I want your cock, please!” She cries out moving her hips to try to push herself onto him. Jolly presses inside of her again, bottoming out. Violet throws her head back and he bites down on her neck.

Jolly doesn’t give her much time to adjust before he begins pounding into her relentlessly. She feels so wet and warm around him that it almost makes him dizzy. He dips his head down, licking and biting on her nipples. He wanted to hear every sound she possibly could make.

“Jolly, I— oh my god..” Violet moans. Tears were beginning to roll down her face, causing her mascara to run. Her hair was a tangled mess and her lipstick was smeared. Jolly admires the complete mess she’s become and the fact that he made her that way pushes him over the edge.

Jolly grabs her by the throat and pushes her back into the mattress. Using his torso, he forces her legs back into her chest further pounding deeper into her. Violet cries out using what little oxygen Jolly was allowing her to have.

“You call me daddy when I’m fucking your cunt like this.” Jolly grunts. The only response she can offer him is a nod. He relaxes his grip on her throat but he keeps her in place.

“Aww, what’s wrong?” Jolly laughs mockingly. “Fucked dumb already?” He says, accentuating each word as he snaps his hips into her.

“Daddy…” Violet writhes beneath him, her hands pulling at her restraints. Jolly raises his eyes and sees her hands twist violently begging to be released.

“Tell me, my flower.” He gently squeezes her neck. “What is it?”

“Daddy, I’m gonna cum.” She whines.

Jolly slides the hand around her throat up to her jaw, gripping it tightly forcing her to look at him. He pounds into her harder, groaning loudly as he feels her clench around him. It’s clear the feeling becomes too intense for her as she attempts to close her eyes and lay her head back but he snaps it back to him.

“Look at me when I’m making you cum. I want to see what I do to you.”

Violet sobs as her orgasm washes over her. Jolly watches in awe as she convulses underneath him. Her gorgeous face twisting in pleasure, breasts bouncing with each thrust. The sound of her calling out for him was like a siren song. Jolly was hooked instantly.

Her body goes limp beneath him as her climax comes to an end. Relaxing the hand around her jaw, he rubs the spot he had been gripping to soothe it. He grazes his teeth against the skin but feels her arm shaking violently next to him.

Jolly unties Violet’s bound wrists from the bed and allows her to relax her arms. She places them around his neck and pushes her hands into his hair. He envelops her face with his hands and wipes the mascara from her eyes and cheeks with his thumbs. Jolly kisses her face softly and she hums.

“Color?”

“Green” Violet laughs, shuddering as the aftershocks of her orgasm continue to hit her. “So fucking green.”

Jolly laughs in response, removing her arms from around his neck. Violet pouts as he pulls out of her. He laughs again and pats her leg gently.

Jolly flips Violet over on her stomach, admiring how her pussy and thighs were still twitching and shaking from her orgasm. His hands roam up the sides of her stomach and her arms. His journey ends at the juncture of her neck and shoulders where he leaves playful bites.

“I’m gonna leave your wrists bound.” He says sucking a spot into her neck. “You’ve been good for me, so I won’t tie you back to the headboard.” He licks the shell of her ear. “If you act up I’ll tie you up so tight the only movement you’ll be making is from me fucking into you.”

He grabs the flesh of her ass, rubbing and kneading. Using two fingers he spreads her slit and slowly pushes into her. He rocks his hips into her slowly, pulling out almost completely and sliding back in.

Violet mewls, pushing back into him desperately. Jolly slaps her ass and tuts at her.

“What did I just say?”

“I need to be good for you, but...” Violet whines, trying desperately to stay still. “I need to feel you. Your cock feels so good inside me, daddy.” Jolly feels her repeatedly clench and release around him. Jolly is grateful that she isn’t facing him as she clenches him so tight his eyes roll back into his head.

Jolly grips the headboard in front of them to steady himself and regain control over the situation. He grabs her hips and pulls her up to him. His large hand tangles in her hair and pushes her face into the mattress.

He grinds into her so deep and slowly it’s enough to drive him insane, but Violet said she wanted to feel him. Jolly was going to make sure she felt every inch of him.

Violet cries and tries to move against him to create more friction but Jolly’s hands hold her in place. He bends over her so that his chest is flush against her back. Jolly ruts into her so hard he can feel her gasps for air underneath him. He nuzzles the side of her face, licking the salt of her tears away.

“Can you feel me now, baby?”

Gasps and choked “oh fucks” are all Jolly hears. He smirks to himself in satisfaction and snakes his hand around her waist. Violet jolts forward as soon as he circles her clit, but with his grip on her hair she doesn’t get far.

“Mmm.” Jolly hums into her ear, his fingers moving faster. “So sensitive. You better cum quick, baby. Daddy doesn’t think he can last much longer.”

Violet mewls, her entire body going rigid. Jolly’s groans echo through the room as she clenches him so tight and he knows she’s close. He continues rutting into her, his fingers matching his pace.

“That’s it. Give it to me, baby. Fuck. I can feel it.”

As her third orgasm hits, she grabs onto the headboard scratching and clawing at the wood. Jolly snaps his hips into her, finally giving them both the friction they so desperately needed. Suddenly, she wails and arches into him, drenching his cock and the bed as she cums.

“Jävlar!” Jolly exclaims, looking down at his thighs that were now coated. “Så vått!" He pulls out to hunch over behind her, licking up her slit and collecting the juices. Violet shakes violently as he cleans her up and he grips both of her thighs tight to keep her steady.

Jolly devours her pussy like a man starved. “You taste even better when you’ve cum, Käraste.” He moans into her. He dives his tongue as deep into her as he can, trying to collect every drop. Violet pushes back into his face and seizes again, another orgasm hitting her.

Jolly grabs her by the hips and pulls her to him, pressing inside her again. She moans softly and he runs his hand along her back. He slowly pumps inside her and she whines, wriggling in his grasp.

“Shh, baby, I know you’re sore.” He coos. He reaches up and unties her wrists. She instantly reaches behind her and threads her fingers through his hair, pulling him down to kiss him hard.

“Hmm.. What’s your color?” Jolly asks between kisses.

“G-green.” She stammers, out of breath.

“Good girl.” Jolly looks down and watches as she takes him. “You’ve been so good to me. Letting me use you like this.” He grabs her waist, drawing her back into him harder. “Your sweet pussy takes me so well.”

Violet whimpers at his praise, using the strength she has left in her legs to fuck herself onto him. Jolly was so mesmerized by the way her body moved against his, he didn’t even care about control anymore. He throws his head back and lets her take over. It doesn’t take long before his stomach tightens and the familiar pressure starts to build.

“Fuck, Vi…Where do you want me?”

“I-I.. mmm...” She responds. “Want to taste you.”

As soon as the words hit Jolly’s ears, his skin buzzes and what little amount of composure he has left in him dissipates. Her responding whine as he pulls out of her nearly ruins her request. Jolly pulls her up by her hair and turns her around to face him.

“You’ve been such a good girl for me, Käraste.” Jolly places his cock on her open lips. “Good girls get what they want.”

Violet opens her mouth completely and sticks out her tongue. He rubs the tip of his cock on it, smearing the pre-cum leaking out. Jolly grabs the back of her head and holds onto her jaw as he slowly fucks her mouth.

From above, he observes her— her mouth full of his cock and her bright eyes staring back at him. He thrusts deeper into her throat and she gags a little, spit pooling at the corners of her mouth and dribbling down her chin.

Violet hollows her cheeks and his knees buckle. He feels her swallow around him and he throws his head back fucking her mouth faster.

“Your pussy is divine but your mouth… god… your mouth was made for my cock.” He grunts loudly. She moans around him, gripping onto his thighs for purchase.

Jolly cums with a shout, spilling his semen down her throat. Violet keeps him in her mouth until he’s bent over her shuddering. Eventually, Jolly pulls her off of him, joking about how she’s trying to kill him.

Violet lies back on the bed catching her breath. Jolly kisses her forehead, rubbing the insides of her thighs and she smiles up at him.

“I’m going to run a bath. I’ll be right back to come get you, okay?”

When Jolly comes back a few minutes later, Violet is already asleep snoozing on his pillow. He smiles and chuckles softly, sliding his hands underneath her to pick her up. She startles slightly but he soothes her.

“C’mon, my flower. Time to get cleaned up.”

Jolly sits her in the bathtub gently, stepping in behind her and situating her between his legs. Violet lays against his chest and he wraps his arms around her. She turns slightly in his embrace and nuzzles into his neck. He can still feel her trembling a little.

He hums softly as he grabs her legs, pulling her into his lap so he can have better access to them. Violet melts into him when he massages her sore muscles and he hopes that she can’t feel his heart beating out of his chest. As much as he loved watching her come undone underneath him, seeing her so peaceful with him meant even more.

They lay together for a while, enjoying the warmth of the water and each other’s skin. There isn’t much conversation, just the sound of Jolly’s humming. Anytime he stops for more than five seconds she nuzzles further into his neck, which he took as a hint to keep going.

Jolly eventually, much to Violet’s protests, adjusts her so he can wash her body. Her demeanor changes when she finds out that back scrubs also come with soft kisses to her shoulders. During his task, Jolly finds out she’s ticklish on her sides and takes full advantage, resulting in fits of giggles and a soaked floor.

After he washes and conditions her hair, he has to threaten to tickle her again to get her to let him rinse her off. After they’re done, he drains the tub and helps her out, wrapping her in a towel and sitting her on the bathroom counter.

Jolly dries himself off and steps out of the bathroom, returning a few minutes later in just a pair of fresh sweatpants. In his hand, he had one of his shirts and another pair of sweatpants, sitting them next to Violet on the counter top.

He helps her off the counter and into his clothes, realizing that he could have skipped the pants altogether once he saw her swimming in his t-shirt. She looked so adorable it made his chest ache.

Violet sits in his lap on the bed as he combs the tangles out of hair. Jolly watches her in the mirror facing them. Her eyes are closed and she looks more content than Jolly has ever seen her. She opens her eyes quicker than Jolly can look away and she catches him staring. A wide smile spreads across her face.

“Do you spoil everyone like this after sex?” She asks, leaning back against him.

Jolly was always adamant about aftercare. To him, it wasn’t an option, it was a requirement. He always makes it special for each partner depending on their needs.

Has he gone to the lengths he went to tonight for her though? Absolutely not.

Jolly feels himself panic briefly, not sure how to respond. He doesn’t want to lie to her, but he doesn’t want to freak her out. He isn’t sure what he is feeling, but they’re not the same feelings he had when she walked in his door earlier.

He stares down at her, her bright eyes once again making him crumble. He cups her face and kisses her gently.

“Just you, my flower.”

#jolly karlsson #joakim jolly karlsson #joakim karlsson #bad omens #bad omens band #bad omens cult #jolly karlsson fanfiction #joakim jolly karlsson fanfiction #joakim karlsson fanfiction #jolly karlsson smut #joakim jolly karlsson smut #bad omens fanfiction #bad omens smut #jolly karlsson x off #fic: the way you bend the way you break

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starieq · 17 days

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“Lovin her seems tiring..” Part 2

Taggies/ warnings; Pro!HeroKats, cheating, fingering, creampie, blowjob, ridding, cumming, squirting, swearing, mention of sex toys, dirty talk, titty fuck, drinking, drunk messaging, dry humping.

part 3!

After that crazy call with your boss, you went right into making reservations so you don’t get yelled at the next week of work.

Wait. Is his girlfriend coming? Should you call and ask? Would he be mad? Do you reserve two rooms? One for you, and one for him? Of course you would! Why wouldn’t you? Don’t make this weird y/n.

You had a lot of what if’s. But, you wanted to be brave and call your hot headed hot boss.

ring, ring, ring.

“The hell ya want now? Thought i made myself fuckin clear.” He grumbles into the phone.

“U-uh,” you stutter. “S-so, is uhm, Kira coming like she usually d-does, or..-“

“No. Just make two rooms. One for you and me.”

“Okay! Thank you for letting me know. B-but i do have a question Mr. Dynamight.”

“Lay it on me.” He says calmly? Wow, you’ve never heard him so calm before.

“So, why I’m I coming..?” You ask a little scared.

“Need ya to come with me cause you’re my damn assistant and you should do as I say. See ya next week y/n.”

He hangs up. God, his voice was so sexy. You couldn’t get enough of it. At least his bitch of a “girlfriend” isn’t coming.

You go to work the next week after your short weekend. You get packed to go to Tokyo, and you plan to maybe go to Tokyo Disneyland since it’s not like your gonna be on patrol with him, right?

Right?

You make your way to the bus station to get to the Dynamight agency. It was snowing and a horrible day to wear a white high waist mini skirt with a cute flower cardigan. At least you have a snow jacket and shoes in the office.

You pay for your ticket and get on the bus. The bus station was pretty packed, you cant be late today. You decided to go on your phone to see the news, until you get a text from your boss.

:Dynamight🧡💥: I need ya to get to the fuckin office now. Go to my office when you’re here.

:y/n: sorry! Bus station is a little full today. I’ll get there as fast as I can! :D

You see the Dynamight agency and run out the bus as fast as you could. You knew Bakugo was a hot head and the last person you wanna piss off. It was kinda hard to run in the thick snow with uggs on, but you couldn’t care less. You NEEDED to get to your boss.

You open the large doors and greeted the front lady that at gives you little candies.

“Thank you Mrs. Hellen!” You wave goodbye and pop the candy in your mouth. You get to the elevator and press floor 8. As you get on, you notice you have a big whole in your tights. Fuck. Those were new too! Damnit.

You gracefully walk to Bakugo’s office and hear grunting on the other side of the door.

You knock on the door and you hear Bakugo startle and race to get up. You’re not sure what he was doing, but your little dirty mind thinks something else.

“What-“ he looks down at you. “Get in here,” He pulls your wrist inside his office.

“Good morning to you too, Mr. Dynamight.” You give him a warm smile and he falls back on his chair.

You notice his face is a little red and his cheeks are slightly puffed. You couldn’t help but also noticed a bulge in his hero cargo pants.

“Ay, eyes up here sweetheart.” He says with a a smug smirk.

“O-oh sorry. I was just thinking about my uh, hole in my tights.” You said. Nice save, you think to yourself.

“Uh huh.” He says turning his chair so the back faces you.

“So Mr. Dynamight-“

“We’re leaving tonight, did ya pack your shit?” You noticed he clenched his jaw when he span his chair to face you again.

“Yeah.. uhm, are you going to pick me up or-“

“Yeah. Text me your address when I leave.”

“Ok.. thank you for your time.” You spin on your heel to leave. You opened the door and took slow steps.

Well, guess you should start working.

@bakugounextswife

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shelbgrey · 4 months

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Code baby(Lance Sweets) Part 1

Paring: Lance Sweets x Wife!Reader, Angela Montenegro x Sister-in-law!Reader, Cam Saroyan x Best friend!Reader

Summary: Lance's wife gets unexpected suprise at work and word travels faster than she thinks

MasterList

“Can you pull the security footage from two weeks ago?” Cam asked. “sure..” Angela said and started typing on her iPad. The footage popped up on the screen and the three of us studied it.

Without really realizing it I slowly started to tune out Cam and Angela by mistake, as they continued to talk about the case my stomach started to turn like it did early this morning and the. I cleared my throat and picked up the hot tea I was drinking, hoping all I needed was a drink. As soon as I sipped it tasted awful and smelled horrible. I forced myself to swallow it and set it back down on the table.

I took a deep and swayed slightly as I moved, I tried to focus on the surveillance footage on Angela's screen.

“N/n…” Cam asked softly and turned towards me. Angela stopped talking and looked at me with a concerned look. The two women watched me like I was about to combust.

My stomach started to turn more and I felt nauseous. “I think I'm gonna be sick…” I looked over at Cam and Angela then nodded. “Yup definitely gonna be sick” I covered my mouth and ran to the nearby bathroom, not caring who in the Lab saw me.

I sprinted through the bathroom door and ripped the biggest stall open making it fly backwards and banging up against the one next door. The noise stung my ears but I was glad it was masking the nauseating sounds of me emptying my sorry excuse of a stomach.

As I took a deep breath there was a soft knock on the door of the stall. “y/n? Can we come in? Are you okay?”

“Yeah... Everything is cool” I groaned to my two best friends from the closed bathroom stall, I screwed my eyes shut then finished emptying out my stomach then flushed the toilet.

“Do you think she's pregnant?” Angela mumbled quietly to Cam as the toilet went through its cycle.

As I unlocked the door of the stall, both Cam and Angela stared at me. Angela crossed her arms and had a slight smirk on her face.

“What?” I asked.

“Are you Pregnant?” Angela said, ripping the bandaid off so to speak.

“Cutting right to the cash aren't you Angie” I chuckled awkwardly.

Cam shrugged. "hey we're just worried is all... You've been acting weird lately and then you puked at just the sight of your tea and now you were in there puking.. just seems like all the signs ya know”

“Honestly I don't know…” I then started counting the days since my last period in my head, then I thought about last week when me and Lance had sex. “Maybe I am” my eyes widened as I chuckled in both happiness and nervousness.

Cam and Angela both looked shocked, but also had small smiles on their faces. Then Cam cleared her throat and looked down awkwardly. “how recently have you ummm.... you know...?”

“What?” chuckled and purposely played dumb. Cam wasn't one to be dirty minded...Nor talk about her sex life. But me being me I just wanted to hear her say it.

Cam sighed trying to not be awkward and stay her serious self. “How recently have you and Lance...You know…”

Angela rolled her eyes and cutted to the chase.“When was the last time you jumped Lance's bones?” Angela asked me, Cam elbows her.

“Umm...this weekend…” I trailed off then mumbled the last part. “In his office…”

Cam and Angela shared a look and busted up laughing. “You did it in his office?” Cam asked, raising an eyebrow, she almost looked impressed.

“huh… Didn't know Lance had it in him” Angela nodded, she looked completely impressed.

My cheeks started to turn red and hid my face in my hands as I laughed. “yeah…”

Cam and Angela kept laughing. “how did it happen?” Angela asked, laughing. “Com’on, details Sweetie”

The three of us never really hid anything about our relationships with our husbands. But Cam was a little less… Detailed then Angela. “mm... So I went to drop off some lunch for him... He was stressed from the case... Then ya know…” I trailed off.

The girls kept laughing. “So you did it right there?” Cam asked, laughing and Angela laughed even harder.

“I mean... The door was locked” I shrugged.

“So just on his desk?” Angela asked, trying not to laugh.

“You girls want a play by play?” I laughed and shook my head.

Cam and Angela kept laughing. “I mean your pregnant after what we just heard it seems like we might as well get the full story and enjoy the fact that you're not the first woman to get pregnant on your husband's desk” Cam said.

I rolled my eyes playfully, knowing she's probably right. “I still think I need to take a test”

“You're probably right,” Cam nodded, looking over at Angela.

I mean... We can use the Dna test again” Angela shrugged. When Angela was pregnant with Michel-Vincent she used a DNA test from the lab as a pregnancy test, then Temperance did the same thing. I haven't done it yet, but I know it as accurately as they come.

Cam nodded. “I can go quick to grab just one if you want”

“Yeah... Let's try it” I nodded.

Cam nods, with a smile on her face. “Okay I'll be right back” She walked out to go get the test, She came back about two minutes later. “all right we have get some blood and I'll test it”

I nodded and the three of us left the bathroom and went into Cam's office to do the test. We sat at her desk as she took a sterile needle and poked the tip of my finger,taking some blood. She put a drop of blood on the test then put it in a container so the test could do its job.

After a few minutes Cam looked at the test because I was too nervous to look myself. She looked at me with a big smile. “it's positive… You're pregnant!”

“Really?!” my eyes lit up as I smiled ear to ear.

Cam smiles, nodding. “You are in fact pregnant!”

Happy tears pricked my eyes and hugged both girls tightly.

--------(3rd pov)--------

Lance was in Seeley's office discussing the case and going through files. It was going slower than usual, but other than that it felt like a normal day for them. What they didn't expect was for Jack to knock on Booth's office door.

“Hodgins, what's up?” Seeley asked, Lance looked surprised to see his brother-in-law. Jack always stayed at the lab with y/n.

“So umm... I'm only bringing this up because the girls have done it before” by the girls he means Temperance, Angela, and y/n. “but umm…” Jack hesitated because in the end it was an odd thing to bring up.

Seeley crosses his arms. “Just spit it out, Bug Boy. What is it?”

“So, the girls have used DNA tests from the Lab as a pregnancy test in the past and when I was taking evidence to Cam's office I saw an unlabeled DNA test…” Jack Cringed now wondering why he even came all the way down the Beauro to bring it up.

Seeley blinks, processing this information, Lance did the same thing but with a more psychological sense to it. “So what? You're saying the unlabelled DNA test from the Jeffersonian was a pregnancy test?” Seeley asked.

“Probably” Jack nodded. “because if it was evidence for a case it would be labeled and with the remains”

Lance thinks through this, trying to process which of the female scientists may be pregnant. Booth snapped his fingers, making Jack and Lance look up. “Wait a second- Hodgins, do you know if the unlabelled test was positive or negative?”

“P-positive…” Jack looked at Seeley and Lance. “One of our wives are pregnant”

Lance raises a brow, but still wanted to hear what Jack had to say. “So wait... you're saying that one of our wives is pregnant but you have no clue which one?”

“It wasn't labeled!” Jack shrugged.

“That's fantastic, just fantastic Hodgins” Seeley rolls his eyes as he says this. “So we have the entire day ahead of us, going nuts trying to figure out who is pregnant, is that correct Hodgins?”

“Would you rather me not tell you guys?”

“Probably” Lance shrugged, closing the file he was reading.

Seeley sighs. “It's fine. So who do you think it is?”

Jack shrugged. “How should I know? I don't your your sex lives” Jack then looked at Lance. “and I rather not know his because he married my sister”

Seeley and Lance both snicker. “Alright then, we need some more information. When exactly did you find the test?”

“about an hour before I came here”

“I think we should keep this to ourselves…Especially if it is one of our wives, they should be the ones to tell us when they are ready,” Lance added.

“Now I think about it… All three of them have been acting kinda strange” Jack said.

Lance was staring off into space, counting in his head. Seeley looked over at him with a questioning look. “Something on your mind, Sweets?”

Lance ignored him and continued counting on his head. Seeley raises his brow “Okay... what the hell are you doing?”

“it's regarding y/n, Do you really want to know?” Lance asked bluntly. Dispite y/n being Seeley's best friend he indeed didn't want to know.

“nope... I'm good”

“It's gonna be a long day” Jack sighed, regretting what he found and just wanted to know who it was.

#Lance Sweets #Lance Sweets x reader #Lance Sweets imagines #John francis daley #Bones imagines #Bones x reader #Bones #camille saroyan x reader #Angela Montenegro x reader #Angel Montenegro #cam saroyan

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hederasgarden · 2 years

Text

Sierra Six

Look, I'm just saying....if people wanted me to....I wouldn't be opposed to writing some reader insert fanfiction about this man.

Spoiler talk under the cut.

I went in expecting a dumb action-adventure movie, but Sierra Six/Court Gentry turned out to be such an amazingly good character. He's a trained killer who is terrifyingly proficient at murdering people, but he also has a moral code and sweet, gentle heart underneath that emotionless facade. His relationship with Claire was beautiful and lent the film some much-needed heart. (When Fitz was dying and she refused to leave him I was SOBBING).

So naturally…I wanna write some reader insert stories with him.

My inbox is open for ideas, but right now, I'm thinking these thoughts.

1 - Zombie AU where Six rescues you from a bad situation and brings you back to the little cabin in the woods he's been surviving in.

“Why did you help me?” You ask, tugging the blankets up higher, like that might offer you protection from the stranger.

“Seemed like you could use it.”

“People don’t just help without a reason,” you tell him.

He turns from the stove to look at you, expression difficult to read. “Anyone ever tell you that you sound a little jaded?” He asks.

2- Six and Claire relocate to a small town where he tries to adjust to domestic life and fails horribly. Claire decides she wants to set him up with you, their new neighbor, when she catches Six watching you.

"I don't really…talk to people." He admits.

When he shifts the grocery bag up higher in his arms your gaze drops to his sizable biceps. You're pretty sure they're bigger than your head. It was attractive and distracting, even more so than his terrible Miami Vice facial hair. "Forgive him. He's actually very charming normally," his niece Claire tells you, drawing your attention away from the prominent vein that runs along his arm. "But we're trying to lay low because he's a secret government agent and wanted by the law." "Oh, well probably best not to talk to people then," you agree, looking up at the man in question. He closes his eyes and exhales, looking so pained it makes you grin. "Claire," he sighs. “What, it's a joke. Chill," she tells him, waving off his concerned look. "Well, secret agent man, do you think you can fix the fence today?" You ask, gesturing to the project he's been laboring over most of the week. "I'd like to let my dog out without fear of him popping in your very pretty vegetable garden." "Six is very serious about that garden," Claire whispers conspiratorially. "It's a new non-murder hobby of his.”

A variation on this is you have some trouble with a shitty ex and Six does his controlled yet violent thing which impresses you.

3 - You’re a nurse who Six visits when he's banged up and can't surface quite yet. He randomly pops into your life and you have sex with him.

#the gray man #sierra six x reader #court gentry x reader #court gentry x you #sierra six x you #court gentry #sierra six

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p-artsypants · 5 months

Text

Would You Still Love Me if I was a Worm?

“She’s not my girlfriend!” Was the declaration he made. Robin kind of figured that would have consequences, but not like this. Now they were stranded on an alien planet, isolated from each other. Robin thought this new slug-like alien was his end, until it spoke with a familiar inflection. “…not…friend…not…girl…”

Ao3

---

This fic is based off the episode Stranded. It's also gross.

—-

“Give me space!”

If you were to ask Robin later, he’d say he’d been a little harsh. But they were in a life threatening situation, so not that harsh.

The fact that the alien came back and attacked the ship had been bad enough, but then when his teammates did the exact opposite of what he wanted and separated, Robin felt betrayed and frustrated.

Now as he hung upside down, dazed and nauseous from his crash, Robin had to wonder where exactly the day went to crap.

A very cynical part of his brain would say it was when Cyborg made that stupid joke.

“…unless you want to stay here goofing around with your girlfriend.”

Cyborg and Beast Boy commonly teased him about his affections toward Starfire, and he could roll with it. But he could not handle the teasing in front of Starfire.

Feelings. The one thing he just couldn’t tackle.

Granted, he didn’t have superpowers influenced by emotion like Raven. And Batman taught him how to harness his anger into strength and not let him go too far.

But a crush? Anything near romantic love?

Forget it.

His reaction to their dumb joke had been just as immature as the joke itself. He fell for it hook, line, and sinker. “She’s not my girlfriend!” He declared.

“I am not a girl?” Starfire had squeaked behind him. “I am not your friend?”

And he hadn’t clarified anything. Hadn’t had the brains to retort, to reassure, to do anything but stammer and blush.

“If I am not your ‘girlfriend’ then what am I?”

Then the space station they were trying to save started falling apart and the alien that caused all of it returned, and they had to flee.

He glanced at the environment monitor. Luckily, despite the outward appearance of the planet, it looked like it was hospitable. Breathable air and slightly cooler temperature.

He kicked the window out. “Titans! Come in Titans! Is everyone okay?”

Nothing but static.

He dropped to the ground.

The air was musty and damp as he landed. He had landed on a fallen tree, and walked out to the end to get a better view of the landscape.

“Cyborg?” His voice echoed. “Beast Boy?” There was no life for miles. “Raven?” He was alone.

“STARFIRE!”

Utterly alone.

But they had to be here, right? Hopefully. He had crashed because the alien had landed on his pod and he had lost control. The rest of them separated and flew away. Did they join back up in space without him?

He opened his communicator, looking for their positions. There was nothing yet.

He used his grapple to get back up into his ship and activate the beacon. Maybe his friends would be able to find his pod eventually, but for now, he would look for shelter.

Nothing more to do than go off and see the lay of the land.

It wasn’t long after he cleared a ridge that he saw another pod from the T-ship.

Starfire’s.

“Starfire!” He shouted, running toward the ship. It was still, and still smoking from the back. It didn’t look like Starfire had opened it. The window was cracked and a long crater dug through the rock where she had crashed. With the state of the ship, she could very well be injured…or worse.

He dug a birdarang into the crease of the window and popped the pod open.

“Starfire! Are you okay?”

There was a vicious snarl before a horrible, ugly, black and green slug-like monster emerged and attacked.

It had a bit of purple fabric in its mouth.

Robin kicked it away, his foot colliding with its head. “What did you do to Starfire!?” He snarled.

The creature let out low grunts like a pig and snorted as it recovered.

Robin attacked again, tackling it and sending them tumbling down the ravine.

Robin had the wind knocked out of him and only had a second to recover before the six legged beast was on him again, its pincher-like jaw snapping at him. He kicked it away again, sending the thing rolling down a hill and colliding with a hard rock.

Robin didn’t relent. He ran, slid down the hill and came into a flying kick to its chest.

The creature’s soft underbelly absorbed the hit, coating his foot in a thick green ooze.

He punched once, then again, both limbs getting coated as well.

He was stuck, and the creature snapped at him.

Robin contorted and kicked it in the face, getting just enough leverage to break free and get away. But not too far away, since the goop was like glue and kept him firmly stuck to the ground.

So this was it, huh? He had a feeling he’d die on the battlefield, but he was hoping it would be on Earth, where his friends and family could find his body and give him a proper burial.

The creature approached him, huffing and grunting. Its pinchers clacked thoughtfully, as it grew closer.

Robin clenched his eyes shut, preparing for the worst.

Instead, the creature let out a long huff, almost like a sigh, and started to lick the goop off his hands and feet, freeing him.

“Uh…” Robin said aloud, as he was able to get to his feet.

The creature backed away slowly, then, with a very guttural and nearly incomprehensible voice said, “…end…me…”

Robin stared in surprise. “You…you can speak? You can understand me?”

The creature nodded its head slowly, “…end me…”

“I don’t want to do that,” Robin declared, “you spared me when you had the chance to kill me.”

The worm skittered around him, crawling on all six legs. Its acid green eyes squinted at him.

“I’m looking for my friend,” Robin tried again. He gestured back up the ravine they had fallen down. “That pod you were in, that belonged to Starfire. She’s a pretty Tamaranean with red hair, wearing purple.” He swallowed thickly. “I saw that fabric on you. Please tell me you didn’t eat her.”

The alien shifted its jaw, but said nothing.

“Please, I need to find her. She’s important to me.”

The creature slowly backed away, and then turned to leave.

“Hey! Wait!” Robin called, running after. “You didn’t say if you saw her or not!”

“...leave me…alone…”

“I will, I just need to know what you know, please!”

The creature stopped mid step. “...Troq…”

Robin’s nostrils flared. “Hey! She is not a troq! You don’t know anything about her!”

The creature huffed. “...I…am Troq…”

“Oh.” Robin halted. “You mean, that’s your name? Or that’s what you are?” He was under the impression that ‘Troq’ meant ‘nothing’, but it could possibly mean this species of alien…which would also be an insult, he supposed. The alien was pretty hideous and gross. “My name is Robin, and I’m a human from Earth.”

“Rob…in…”

“Yeah! Look, maybe we can be friends? If you help me, I’ll help you.”

“...end…me…” The alien pleaded again.

Robin shook his head. “I can’t do that. Are you in pain?”

“...so much…pain…”

“I’m sorry. Did…did I cause that?” He thought back to the ruthless attacks he’d unleashed when he first saw the creature.

“...yes…”

Now he felt bad. He hadn’t known this was a sentient being.

“I’m sorry. I…I thought you hurt Starfire. If we find all my friends, we can help you. My friend Raven can heal you.”

“...can not…”

“We don’t know if we don’t try.” He got in front of the creature, making it halt its retreat. “But first, I need to know what you know about Starfire. Please.”

The creature shifted its jaw again. “...I…am…”

“You are what?” He pressed, when the creature seemed to trail off.

“...give…you…space…” The worm said then, and attempted to move past Robin.

But Robin got in its face, looking it dead in the eye. “What did you say?”

“...give…Robin…space…” It whimpered, shuffling away from him.

Then it clicked. This thing was in Starfire’s pod.

He gaped. “Star? Is that you?”

She whimpered again, backing away from him.

“Hey, hey,” he reached his hands out in a soothing way. “I’m your friend, Starfire. What happened to you? Why do you look like this?”

Starfire looked around, looking for a way out, and presumably found it as she darted away.

“Starfire!” He chased after.

She was fast, but not very coordinated with six legs as she skittered, tripped, and slid. She let out a long whine.

Robin caught up to her quickly. “What’s going on? Talk to me, Star.”

“...leave me…”

“I’m definitely not! I’ve been looking for you!”

“...ugly…”

“You’re certainly…a little different looking.” He offered.

She snorted.

“Okay, so you’re a lot different looking. But we’ve been through this before, when you went through Transformation. I’m your friend. I don’t care what you look like.”

“...not…friend…not…girl…”

Robin’s jaw dropped. “Star! You’ve transformed into a worm and you’re still caught up on that?! Seriously?!”

She whined again, and covered her head with her front legs.

He sighed, wiping a hand down his face. There was no getting out of this conversation, huh? “Look, uh…’girlfriend’ means something different on Earth. It’s like…a special relationship. Boyfriends and girlfriends go on dates and stuff. You’re my friend, but you’re not my girlfriend. Does that make sense?”

Starfire whined again, and growled, “...I am…not special…”

Robin’s shoulders sank as he felt frustrated and a little forlorn. Starfire was hurting, and somehow transformed, but it was like trying to reason with a wall.

Maybe he needed to change communication tactics.

He knelt down in front of her, and rested a hand on her head. Even through the gloves she felt slimy. “Hey…Star, you are special to me. I think…whatever this is, whatever turned you into this, is clouding your mind with doubt and self-loathing. Once we get you fixed, you’ll see. Everything is fine, okay?”

Starfire didn’t answer right away, but looked up at him. Her pinchers fluttered and she let out a snort. Then she said, “...always trust…Robin…”

He offered her a smile. “Hey, I’ll take it.” He checked his communicator again, seeing her signal faintly. “Do you have your communicator?”

She quivered and made a horrible gagging sound before barfing up her communicator.

Robin suppressed every disgusted reaction he had, and just said, “ah, I’ll hold onto that for you.” As he tucked it into his belt, he said, “let’s go see if we can find the others. Raven might be able to figure out what’s wrong with you.”

Starfire snorted, whatever emotion she felt clouded by her hideous form. Then she scurried on ahead, at a nice clip.

“Hey wait!” Robin ran after to catch up.

She turned to him. “...find friends…or wait…?”

“We’ll find them, but let’s travel together.”

“...must we…?”

“Uh, yeah?” He asked, a little offended. “They won’t recognize you. I didn’t. You don’t want to travel with me?”

“...give…Robin space…” She said again, trudging on.

Robin quickly caught up with her, but didn’t stop her.

“I’m sorry if that hurt you. I was panicking and needed to think about escaping the space station. I don’t need space anymore. I need my friend.”

“...not friend…”

“Yes, you are!” Robin shouted, honestly a little harsher than was necessary. “In fact, I’d say you’re my best friend!”

“Do not…believe you…”

“Ouch. Why would I lie about that?”

“...try to…save my feelings…too late…”

Robin had to remember that whatever form this was was extremely pessimistic.

Heck, he’d probably be pretty depressed if he was a worm.

“Well, I’m not lying. I’ll find a way to prove it to you.”

“...does not…matter…”

He rubbed a hand down his face. Maybe walking with Raven would have been sunnier.

He gave her some time in silence, as it was hard enough to find something to talk about. This form didn’t allow her to freely communicate either.

“I hope we find the others…and soon,” he muttered.

“...silence…” Starfire said, quietly. “...ground…unstable…” And she carefully started stepping with purpose over the slightly glowing surface.

Robin mimicked her movements, his brain still wrapped up in Starfire’s predicament. There was plenty he didn’t understand about alien biology, but he couldn’t imagine that Tamaraneans spontaneously transformed into worms.

Did they?

“Look, Starfire—”

Ah right, the ground was unstable.

Robin screamed as a burst of flames and gas exploded under his feet and he was sent soaring across the landscape…right towards a crevasse filled with hot pink lava.

He was only saved from certain death by a slimy purple appendage wrapping around his waist and yanking him to safety. Once on solid ground, he caught his breath and realized the appendage was Starfire’s tongue.

He decided not to comment on how gross that was, and instead said, “thanks, I thought I was done for!”

Starfire grunted, and started waddling away from him.

He only sped up to keep pace with her. “So…are you still able to fly?”

“No,” she spat.

“And no starbolts?”

“No.”

“Okay. That’s fine! I can protect you!”

“I…almost killed you…” She hissed.

He came up short, and then chuckled. “True. You don’t need me to protect you. I guess…you never really did, huh? You’re stronger than me, and you can fly. You’ve caught me more times than I can count.”

“...you are…valuable ally…”

Robin felt his heart shrivel. ‘A valuable ally’ was how he felt about Tram, Aqualad’s aquatic partner.

She kicked him out of the friendzone and into the Tram-zone. Harsh!

The barren wasteland they traveled didn’t get any less treacherous, and there was still no sign of the other Titans. Robin feared the worst. Were they trapped here forever? Would Starfire remain like this?

A plume of orange smoke erupted from the ground, obscuring Starfire from his sight.

“Star?” He called out, moving to where he had last seen her, but finding a drop. He followed the edge, keeping his eyes on the plume. When it finally cleared, he saw Starfire standing maybe 50 feet away, on the other side of a ridge. The bottom was dark and deep.

“Starfire!” He shouted to her.

She turned and stared at him, nervously shuffling her many feet. He had a horrible feeling she was going to bolt. She would run and he’d lose her, and maybe never see her again.

“I’m coming over!” He withdrew his grapple line, and shot it into the rocks behind her. Then he simply glided over to her. “We shouldn’t get separated.”

Before she could respond, the ground shook beneath their feet, before giving out.

As Robin fell, he twisted and turned, looking for a way to safety. Nothing but sheer cliffside and his spent grapple line disappearing rapidly above him.

It seemed like Starfire would be his savor again as her tongue wrapped around his waist and he was pulled against her with a slimy splat.

She scurried up the rock face like a lizard, keeping him firmly tucked to her sticky underbelly with her front legs. Then she darted into a cave, where the entrance caved in immediately after them. Then they were alone in the dark.

“...am sorry…” She pried him free and dropped him, dripping with goop, onto the cave floor.

Robin suppressed a gag and a shutter. “Uh…don’t be. You saved my life.” He attempted to shake the goop free.

“I have…stained your suit…”

“I have others. It's fine, Star.”

She grunted, not believing him.

Since all his gadgets stuck to his gloves, he simply peeled them off and dropped them on the ground, then he was able to pull his communicator out for faint light.

The cavern wasn’t very big, but thankfully contained some old, dried tree roots that would burn fine. Besides that, there didn’t seem to be any other way out.

“Looks like we’re stuck here.”

Starfire whined again.

“Well, for now,” he added, trying to be optimistic for both of them. “The ship should pick up our communicators when Cyborg gets it up and running.”

“...leave me here…”

“Not happening,” he said without hesitation. He got to work collecting firewood, made a pile, and lit it using one of his emergency flares. While he did all of this, Starfire just sat a few feet away with her back to him.

“Do…you want to come closer?”

“No.”

He sighed. This was not going well. It was going quite bad, actually. It was one thing to be stranded on an alien planet, but if Starfire had been in her normal form and able to communicate like usual, he wouldn’t have worried at all. They were unstoppable together!

But this was…different. This whole dynamic was wrong. He hated it. And he hated that he didn’t know how to fix it.

Just then, a new thought occurred to him. One that probably should have crossed his mind earlier, but his thoughts were always a little jumbled when it came to Starfire.

“Star…do you know what transformed you into this?”

Her answer made dread coil in his stomach. “...yes…”

He clenched his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose. Right. Of course she did. And if he had bothered to ask instead of just assume, maybe this would have been solved a few hours ago and they could have had a pleasant search instead of this awkward…whatever it was.

“So, what happened? How can I help?”

She glanced at him with her acid green eyes. “...not friend…not girl…”

He groaned. “Starfire! We are sooo far past that!” He didn’t want to yell at her, but he was certainly ready to.

“...not understand…”

“Okay, where did I lose you? What do you not understand?”

“...no…Robin…not understand…”

Well now he felt awful. He sighed again. “You’re right. I don’t understand. I don’t understand and it makes me really frustrated. I want to help you Star. I don’t like seeing you like this. So just…” he sat on a rock by the fire, and took a long deep breath. “Just tell me what’s going on.”

Starfire whimpered.

“I’m sorry I was short with you. I will just listen, and I won’t judge.” He folded his arms over his knees and just waited.

Eventually, Starfire crept a little closer. “…Tam…rean…”

“Tamaraneans?”

“…yes…powers by…feeling. Fly joy…strength confi…dence…”

He nodded in understanding. He’d seen Peter Pan as a kid. Happy thoughts equal flight was not a foreign concept.

“...feelings…emotion…is everything.”

“And a strong enough emotion can change you?”

“...Tam…reans…love once. Mate for…life. When love…rejects…” she whimpered, bowing her head. “...heartbreak…chaos…”

“Wait,” Robin held his hands out. “Wait wait wait…let me make sure I understand this. You’re saying that Tamaraneans…love once? Like, they only fall in love one time in their whole life?”

“...yes…”

“And if the person they fall in love with rejects them, the heartbreak they feel causes chaos?”

She nodded with a grunt.

“But how did—?” It took a second but he got it. “ME?!”

She shuffled backwards, awkwardly. “…Robin said…not friend…not girl…broke heart…”

“So you literally became something that’s not a friend or a girl.” He groaned. “Starfire…you’re in love with me?”

“...sorry…” Acid tears rolled down her hideous face and sizzled on the ground.

He fought for words for a long time, because on one hand, he was thrilled. Elated even. She loved him! It wasn’t that surprising, given how close they were and the amount of teasing that came from Beast Boy and Cyborg (it had to be prompted by something) but to hear it! She loved him, before anyone else! He, who was a little short, ill tempered, and job obsessed.

On the other hand, it meant that this was all his fault. His inability to talk about his feelings, his hesitation to clarify the misunderstanding, and his wildly immature reaction to Cyborg’s joke. He could have laughed it off. He should have just ignored it, but because he made the bold and angry declaration, ‘she’s not my girlfriend!’ of course Starfire would feel rejection.

“Starfire…” his shoulders sagged. “I didn’t know.”

“...did not want to tell…happy being on Earth…happy just being…Titan…”

“You were never going to tell me?”

She shook her head. “...heartbreak…dangerous.”

He threw his head back with a groan. He felt like the absolute scum of the earth. “What do we do to fix this?”

“...cannot…”

“So…you’re stuck like this? There’s nothing I can do?”

“...if I…kill you…” she whimpered. “...but cannot…will not…”

His eyes widened. “That’s why you attacked me at the pod. But then you couldn’t go through with it.”

She laid on the ground and covered her face with her front legs. “...still love…even now…”

Tears welled up in his eyes. He hated to admit that this was killing him, but it was. He shook his head, resigned. “I’m such an idiot, Starfire. Even if I told you right now that I love you too, you wouldn’t believe it.”

She whined loudly, the sound akin to a sob.

“I’m so sorry. The truth is that I…really care about you. Like...you’re the first thing I think of in the morning, and the last thing before I fall asleep.”

Starfire lifted her head to look at him.

“Our relationship is…probably the most important one I have in my life. Yes, I love our friends and I consider them my family, but you…you’re extremely special.”

She crawled closer, her eyes still dripping acid.

“I’m so out of my depth right now,” he confessed. “I’m not good at talking about my feelings and stuff. Batman wasn’t good at it. So we never practiced.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I’m making this worse, aren’t I?”

She crawled ever closer, making little huffing sounds. “...please…keep going…”

He patted his thigh, inviting her closer.

She rested her head on his leg.

Even though she was gross and slimy and her hide had a weird texture, Robin rested his hand on her head and started petting her. He simply refused to be repulsed. Just like he refused to be afraid when they first met.

“I think I always knew you were special to me,” he stated. “When you kissed me when you arrived on Earth, I think it left a pretty big impression on me. After that, I found myself seeking you out. I enjoyed spending time with you. I liked showing you all that Earth had to offer. I liked listening to your stories of Tamaran. I was…sensitive to you. I knew when Blackfire came to visit that things weren’t okay. I kept an eye on you, because I didn’t want to lose you. I almost did…” he swallowed. “That fight was amazing to watch. You were so focused, so resolved to take her out, it just took one bolt. It was…awesome. Everytime I watch you fight I’m amazed. You’re the strongest girl ever, and you’re really graceful when you fly.”

She released a low moan, and he realized talking about her ability to fly was probably a sore spot at the moment.

“Star…I’m not a perfect person. I think I’m far from it. I’ve done a lot to hurt you and the others. I don’t deserve someone as wonderful as you loving me…” he gnawed on his bottom lip. “There was this moment that has always stuck with me. It was during that battle while I was Slade’s apprentice. You and I were squared off. I had that laser, and you had a bolt aimed at me. I couldn’t shoot you. I just couldn’t. I was silently begging that you would shoot first so I wouldn’t have a choice.”

His voice warbled. “But then you dropped your hand. You said, ‘I cannot live in a world where we have to fight. So if you are truly evil, do what you must.’” He shook his head, new tears coming to his eyes just remembering it. “You were willing to die. You would have rather died than hurt me. I shared that sentiment, but it wasn’t until I infected myself with those nanobots that I was able to act on it. But that’s when I—-”

“Rob…in…?”

His lips twitched as he held back a sob. This vulnerability was uncomfortable, but Starfire needed it. So he’d push on.

“That’s when I knew. I knew I wanted to be with you, somehow, forever. It may have been a crush, or maybe the beginning of love. I don’t know. I hadn’t felt like that before. Nothing to compare it to.”

He wiped just under his eyes with his free hand. “I think Cyborg figured it out first. He kept teasing me about being jealous when Aqualad or Speedy talked to you, or when you got betrothed to that gurgle-what’s his face. And he was right! I was jealous!”

“…didn’t need to be…”

“I know that now!” He couldn’t help but laugh. “I wish I had known.”

In hindsight, it was actually pretty obvious she had feelings for him. She always sought him out first. She was quick to fret over him in a fight.

How many movie nights had she ‘accidently’ fallen asleep on his shoulder? She was always the one that begged him to come out of his office to eat or spend time with them.

She made sure he was safe, healthy, and happy. Is that not what love boils down to?

And he constantly took advantage of that. Instead of the gratitude she deserved, he gave her grief. Even now, being the person that he was caused her great pain.

“I’m so sorry…” He cried. “I did this…”

“...Robin is good…at being mean…to Robin…”

“And you were always so good at stopping me from doing that. I don’t know what I’m going to do now. It might actually destroy me…” He saw it all unraveling, just like she had relayed from the future she had seen. His friendships falling apart, and he becoming a carbon copy of Batman; brooding, obsessed, and alone.

“We’ll just have to adapt,” he said stubbornly. “So, you’re a worm now. You still kick butt!”

“...Robin…”

“The others will just have to get used to it. And to the rest of Jump, you’ll be my lizard-alien girlfriend. They already think we’re together, so it’s not that big of a stretch.”

“...Robin…” she grunted. “...this body…hurts. It is…unnatural…”

He used his hands to wipe away her tears, but when he found them to burn his flesh, he used his cape instead.

“...when the others…find us…please…end me…”

“I…I don’t know if I can do that,” he breathed. “I’m sorry. I want to make all your pain go away. I want to fix all of this, but…I can’t kill you, Starfire.”

More burning tears fell.

“I know I’m being selfish. All I ever do is hurt you.”

“...untrue…”

“Well, it certainly feels like it. And right now, I want to see if there’s something else that can be done. Maybe Raven can help. I want to try everything we can first.”

“...alright…always trust…Robin…”

He clenched his eyes shut, guilt swirling through his veins. “Can I hold you until they find us?”

“...am…disgusting…”

“I don’t care, Star! I don’t care!” He wrapped his other arm around her and pulled her head to his shoulder.

She was cold. There was no warmth to this hug. She secreted a foul smelling ooze that coated his arms the longer he touched her. Her acid tears dripped on his shoulder and burned through his cape and tunic, right down to his skin.

He winced in pain.

“…repulsive…”

“Do you not want me to hold you?”

She didn’t say anything, unwilling to lie. She was in pain, emotional turmoil, completely unable to love herself. Being held by the man she loved was the smallest favor she could ask for.

“I wish I had told you months ago,” he lamented. “Romance, dating, that all scares me. I think Batman did it to me on purpose. He always said that love is a weakness, and that a girlfriend would be used against me. I was scared.”

Starfire made a little trilling noise.

“But it’s so stupid, because our bad guys tried to target you to get to me anyway. Not that they were very successful since you kick butt. But it was like I had the weakness of loving someone without the benefits of getting to enjoy…you know, romance. There are so many places I wanted to take you, just you, but I didn’t know how to ask without it sounding like a date. We could have held hands, or k-k-kissed or whatever the Tamaranean equivalent is!” He sighed. “Bruce made it seem like falling in love is the scary part. He’s totally wrong. This is the scary part. I could have spent the rest of my life learning about you and falling in love with your quirks. But losing you? Imagining what comes after? No, this is the scary part.”

“…Bruce…?” She asked.

He was surprised that’s what she chose to comment on. “That’s Batman’s name. Bruce Wayne.”

“Oh…”

“And my name is Richard Grayson, Dick for short.”

“…I know.”

“…you did? When did—how did—?”

“…first met…lived with you…before tower…saw mail…your secret…I keep.”

“Thank you. It means a lot.”

“…what is John?”

“What do you mean?”

“…Rich…ard John. What is…?”

“Oh. John is my middle name. I guess Tamaraneans don’t have those. John was my father’s name. My mom's name was Mary.”

“Pretty name…” She sighed. “...gone?”

“Yeah, they’re both gone.” Then he realized that her curiosity never left. Even in this painful slug-worm form, she still wanted to learn.

Or maybe it was just because it was him. Any opportunity she had to catch a glimmer of what hid behind his mask, she took.

So he took the mask off, dropping it to the floor. Whatever came after today, he didn’t really care. All he wanted was to give Starfire anything and everything she wanted.

He told her everything. His life story, his tragedies, his cherished joys, his darkest secrets. At first, it was uncomfortable. It was like confessing a crime, but the longer he spoke, the easier it became. The truth poured out of him like a fountain.

His fears on the field with Batman, his insecurities, his likes, dislikes, anything he could think of.

“...do not need…to share all this…”

His gentle petting of her gross hide had progressed into a massage, as he hoped it would ease some of her pain. “Sure, I don’t need to, but I want to. Because I trust you. I’ve always trusted you to catch me on the field, or perform a maneuver when I call it…if I can trust you in a situation where lives are at stake, there’s little room for error and very little time to think…why shouldn’t I trust you with everything else? You’ve had my heart for a long time, Star, and you’ve taken good care of it. Better care than I have. I know I am completely safe with you.”

He swallowed and exhaled as the last little bit of truth came out. “When I’m with you, I’m home.”

Her reaction was not what he was expecting, or wanted. She cried out in pain and writhed away from him.

“Star! Star, what’s wrong?”

She didn’t answer as she snorted and grunted and contorted on the ground.

He hovered nearby, his hands reaching for her, but not quite touching, as he didn’t know what to do. He grimaced as she cried out again.

“I’m so sorry,” he cried. “I don’t know what to do!”

Slowly, she stopped wriggling, and laid still on the ground.

“Starfire?” He breathed.

There was no movement. All the acid green coloring to her eyes and mouth faded, until she was all a dull dark green.

Robin swore as he slumped back against the rock. This couldn’t be happening. It couldn’t be. Not now, when all the pieces fell into place. When he finally felt peace, when he finally figured out what he needed and what he so desperately wanted…it was gone. She was gone.

He buried his face in his hands as the tears came. Bitter tears of searing loss that were painfully familiar. Tears of losing someone you loved and not being prepared for it. A lesson he didn’t learn from.

He didn’t cherish her enough. Didn’t love her when he had the chance.

Stupid and foolish and cruel and—

There was a crackling sound.

It came from her body. Something was shifting under the skin.

“Oh, this just keeps getting worse, huh?” He lamented.

A fist punched itself free of the confines of the worm, a humanoid hand with sun kissed skin.

“…Starfire?” Robin squeaked.

Another hand ripped the slimy black skin away, and a head with red hair emerged. She had her back to him, but he knew those shoulders.

Starfire shook her arm, flinging some strands of green goo away from her. “I wonder if this is how it feels to be a freshly molted Tomethean fly.”

“Star…?” he asked again, crawling towards her.

Starfire whipped her head around to stare at him. “...Robin…” She said, just as softly.

He knelt at her side and withdrew a birdarang to cut away the rest of the worm-carcass. She was completely naked, but he tried not to dwell on it.

“I thought…” she whispered. “…I did not…” Her lips trembled as she tried to collect her thoughts.

“It's alright now, Star,” he wiped some slime off her cheek. “You’re okay.”

“Robin…” she sobbed. “I did not know it could be reversed!”

He held her face tenderly. “I’m glad it was,” he smiled at her softly.

She self-consciously pushed her goopy hair back and covered her chest with an arm. “Surely, I am still disgusting and you do not need to touch me until I have had a proper bath.”

“Actually,” he grinned. “I think you might be the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

“Really?” She stared at him, those beautiful green eyes sparkling like emeralds.

“Yeah,” he pulled her forward so they could touch their foreheads together. “You’re out of this world.”

She giggled, and rested her hands on his shoulders. “On this planet, we are both aliens.”

“Hey, I guess you’re right.” As he wiped more goop off her face, he realized it didn’t smell foul like the slime earlier had. And it dried rather quickly, like Aloe Vera.

“All those things you said, it was all true?”

“I meant every word, Star. I love you. I want to be with you. I want a future with you.” He cringed slightly. “As long as you want that. I’d understand if you had mixed feelings or needed time after all of this.”

“Robin, if you can say you love me after seeing me in this most foul state, then I shall certainly take you up on that offer.”

He pulled her into a tight hug, a hold so tight it would have hurt any other woman, but Starfire just gleefully returned the hug. He’d savor the bruises for later.

“Come on,” he scooped her up into his arms and lifted her out of the remains of her cocoon. Then he walked them back over to the rock and sat with her in his lap, keeping her close. He unhooked his cape and draped it over her. “I know it’s not much, but at least you’re partially covered.”

“A state of undress does not bother me,” she said casually. “In fact, it is a sign of affection on Tamaran to have skin to skin contact.”

“O-Oh?” He squeaked.

“Yes. Your lip contact is just used for language assimilation, and then of course, copulation is used solely for reproduction. Of course, I am not adverse to these practices if it is something you wish to partake in. I am sure that with you, I would find pleasure in most things.”

Robin felt his face color several shades. “Well…the uh…copulation thing…let’s not worry about that for a while.” He rested his bare arm on her stomach, his hand slightly massaging her side. “How else do Tamaraneans show physical affection?”

She became shy, a cute blush dusting her cheeks. “We…touch our tongues together. Though humans have much smaller tongues than we do, I imagine it will be difficult.”

“We have a similar practice, actually,” he gently bonked his forehead against her temple. “You may have heard of it as French kissing, or making out.”

“Oh! Yes! I have heard that on the television! Also, Beast Boy once told me a joke about it that I did not understand.”

“What was the joke?”

“He asked if I had ever heard of Australian kissing. I said I hadn’t, and he said it was like French kissing, but down under.”

Robin scoffed. “That’s so crude. He should have known better than to say that to you.”

“But I still do not understand it.”

He sighed. Maybe the real joke Beast Boy told was imagining this exact scenario. “Australia is commonly called ‘Down Under’. The joke is that an Australian kiss is a tongue kiss…down below, instead of on the mouth.”

Her eyes went comically wide. “Are you suggesting that your people have tongue to gential contact?”

“...yes?”

“I cannot imagine that would be sanitary.”

He chuckled. “We do a lot of gross things.”

“Perhaps we shall try it sometime, and I will change my mind.”

He sputtered as he blushed harder. “Again, we’ll worry about that later.”

Starfire had her arms around his neck. She reached a hand up to hold his face. “Another form of affection we have is prolonged eye contact. I will admit I tried to do this often with you, but your mask…”

“I’ll try to have it off when we’re alone.” He offered.

“Your eyes are so very beautiful. I am grateful you allowed me to see them.”

“Thank you.” I could say the same about your breasts, he thought. “Your eyes are pretty too.”

Starfire just sighed happily and batted those big green eyes at him.

He gazed into them lovingly for a while, and then begrudgingly broke contact. “Hold on. Now that you’re okay, I should probably check to see if the others have gotten any signal yet.”

Starfire rested her head on his shoulder, embarrassed. “I had forgotten.”

“You forgot?”

“I was caught up in the peril of being a worm, and then the euphoria of being loved in return.”

“Well, when you say it like that, I understand completely.” He kissed her temple before he took out his communicator. Thankfully, there was a new blip on the screen, marked as Cyborg. He called to see if they could get through.

Starfire quickly put his mask on for him.

“––bin? Tha–you?”

“Cyborg? Can you hear me?”

“Kinda fuzzy. —fire with you?”

“Yes, Starfire is with me.”

“BB—me. Fixin’ —ip. We’ll meet up—done. Might be—while.”

“Have you heard from Raven?”

“Not yet.––location on ship. She’s not––far from us.”

“Okay. We’ll sit tight for now.”

Robin very clearly saw Cyborg and Beast Boy smile smugly on the other side of the screen, before Cyborg sang, “have fun with your girlfriend!”

Robin just smirked back and said, “thanks! I will!” Then he turned the communicator to Starfire’s face, and kissed her fully on the mouth before ending the call.

She squeaked as he made contact, before she melted into the kiss.

He attempted to pull away, but she held him firmly in place, deepening the kiss and carding her fingers through his hair. Oh yeah, Robin thought. I could definitely spend the rest of my life getting used to this.

#robin #starfire #robstar #teen titans #tt animated #TT #dick grayson #koriand'r #episode: Stranded

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bro-atz · 3 months

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1024UB CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE: IS THIS A DATE?

word count: 3.5k

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Gyuri didn’t think she had any weird kinks. She got turned on by the standard things, and that was pretty much it. However, seeing an exceptionally emotionally vulnerable San the other night really did it for her. She thought about the look on his face at odd hours during the day, and it definitely wasn’t helpful to visualize him in the middle of cooking, or class, or literally any other time. She absolutely adored the way he kissed her that night, too. She always hated kisses that were just pecks on the lips, but she’d literally do anything for him to kiss her softly like that again.

Whenever the thought of him that night popped into her head, she involuntarily touched her lips, and right after, she would remember the sad yet sultry look on his face when he hovered above her. Every time she thought about it, she could feel heat rush to her cheeks, and she would have to press her hands against her cheeks to calm them down. It was quite annoying to do this on the hour every hour she was awake, but God, that look was everything to the point where she really wished she had a picture of his face.

In the same vein, she was also extremely frustrated with him. She wanted to know what led him to that point that day, but every time she brought it up, he just brushed her off and avoided the subject or gave her a half-assed answer. Heat rampaged through her stomach thinking about how much she wanted him to look at her like that again but with at least knowing the reason why this time. Her fingers found their way to her lips once more and pressed lightly.

“Hello? Earth to Gyuri?” Gyuri snapped out of her trance when someone waved their hand in front of her face.

“Sorry, I spaced out,” she immediately apologized.

She was at Ze Cafe with Seonghwa just grabbing coffee and chilling out. He asked her to hang out with him, and given the situation they all were in, she had no choice but to say yes. She wasn’t opposed to hanging out with Seonghwa, but honestly speaking, she wanted to spend a little more time with San on the weekends.

“Yeah, I could tell. What’s on your mind?” Seonghwa asked.

“Oh, nothing, really…”

“Are your lips chapped or something? You keep touching them,” Seonghwa pointed out. “I have some lip—”

“No!, No, they’re fine,” Gyuri interrupted him.

Seonghwa nodded and took a sip of his coffee before saying, “Are you okay? You seem out of it.”

Gyuri didn’t know how to respond to that. She knew she had to lie because there was no way in hell she was going to tell Seonghwa about her and San— not yet for that matter. She moved her fingers from her lips to her forehead and said, “Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just a little mentally-not-here… That last assignment was horrible.”

“God, yeah, that was killer,” Gyuri was relieved that he accepted her response. “Maybe we should take the day to do relaxing things?”

“What, relaxing at Ze Cafe isn’t enough?” Gyuri couldn’t help but laugh.

“Let’s do something new and go out.”

Her heart tightened— why did he phrase it like that? Did he mean go hang out? Go out and hang? Was he asking her on a date? Gyuri thought that denial would be her friend in that situation, so she said, “Sure, we can go hang out,” hoping that the crisis would be averted.

“Cool. I was thinking the museum— that new photography exhibit just opened up, and I know how much you’d been wanting to go,” Seonghwa smiled and leaned back in his chair.

“Oh my God, yes!” a smile immediately spread across her face, only to fall seconds later. “Wait, but can we even get tickets? They’re sold out already… I tried to get them the other day.”

“I managed to snag two,” Seonghwa said nonchalantly.

A bad feeling started to emerge from deep within Gyuri’s gut. She had been trying to get tickets for the exhibit for well over two weeks now, and the fact that Seonghwa just happened to have two tickets didn’t sit well with her. She hoped that he originally got them for him and his ex-girlfriend, and now he needed someone to go with. Gyuri kept telling herself that as she responded, “Okay, let’s go.”

“Let’s leave now, then?” Seonghwa stood up, his coffee mug in hand.

Gyuri nodded and stood up as well. She locked eyes with Seonghwa, only for him to grin widely. Gyuri responded with a weak smile because she just knew something bad was going to happen, but she didn’t know how the hell she would get out of that situation at that point. Also, she still really did want to go to the exhibit, so she swallowed her fear and doubt and went with Seonghwa to the exhibit.

Upon arriving at the exhibit, she and Seonghwa were talking pretty normally, which made Gyuri feel a whole lot better about the situation. They barely stood in line for the exhibit, and when Seonghwa produced the tickets for them to get into the exhibit, Gyuri caught a brief glimpse at them. There were timestamps for the tickets, but it was not the purchase date— rather, it was an entry time. Gyuri checked the time on her phone and tried to recollect the time on the ticket, but she was only able to see it in the fleeting moment. Regardless, something was definitely weird about the tickets and the way Seonghwa got her to come with him for the exhibit.

The exhibit itself was a dream for Gyuri. Since she loved traveling the world, she also loved pictures of the world. She was a novice at taking them herself, so she was always in awe of the people who could do what she always wanted to do. Her heart fluttered as she saw the beautiful landscapes of South America. She quietly resolved to herself that the next place she solo-backpacked through would be South America.

She stood before one picture in particular: the Bolivian salt flats. She just stared at the reflection of the sky on the flats and wondered how on Earth a place like this existed, especially after humans ruined everything. Her arms rested at her sides as she just took in the beauty of the photo, the sounds around her filtering out. It was simply just her and the photograph.

That was when she was snapped back to reality. She felt someone come up from behind her, and she immediately turned around to see that it was Seonghwa. He didn’t seem to notice that she was looking at him— he, too, seemed enamored with the photo. Gyuri hesitantly directed her attention back to the photograph, painfully aware that she and Seonghwa were standing extremely close to each other. She could feel her heart racing, and it took everything in her to not hold her hand over her beating heart. She settled for balling her hands into fists.

“Hey, there’s more over here,” Seonghwa whispered, his voice dangerously close to her ear.

He turned and walked towards the place he was talking about, but before he had, Gyuri felt his shoulder and hand brush lightly against her. She froze. Her mind was reeling. She wanted to know what the hell her own feelings were. Did she still have a crush on Seonghwa? Was it guilt that she was here with Seonghwa? She asked herself various versions of these questions as she and Seonghwa continued walking, the questions making her unable to even comprehend the rest of the exhibit.

Gyuri was able to calm herself down and act normal as they left the exhibit and went to a nearby bistro for lunch. They sat across from each other, and thankfully they were able to converse normally. Honestly, Gyuri was starting to forget how their friendship used to be before she started having that crush on him, and now she was remembering. They talked about dumb shit from their high school years and their college days, and overall just had a good time.

“Do you remember when Mr. Lee asked Ms. Song out during Valentine’s Day?” Seonghwa asked.

“Oh my God, yes! I was part of the committee that handed out the valentines that day. Seeing their names really freaked me out,” Gyuri covered her mouth as she remembered.

“I still can’t believe she said yes. I heard from someone that they’re actually engaged now.”

“No fucking way! Good for them.”

“Oh, speaking of engaged, did you know that Hyunjin is actually getting married in a couple months?”

“Yeah, I got the wedding invitation. It’s so crazy that he’s getting married so young,” Gyuri munched on her salad with slight disgust.

“Forget that, I can’t believe he’s the first one of us to get married. That boy was such a slut, I’m surprised he picked one person,” Seonghwa laughed.

“Dear God, yes! There was that rumor that he was spreading whatever STD it was around the student body, right? That wasn’t real, right?”

“No, he’s clean.”

“How do you know this?” Gyuri was a little skeptical.

“He forced me to come to the clinic with him as a witness,” Seonghwa frowned. “He didn’t have to go so far to prove the point… The receptionist thought that we were together.”

Gyuri nearly choked on her salad just thinking about her best friend dating that boy slut Hyunjin. High school Gyuri would’ve also been mortified.

They continued to talk, but at some point, it was Gyuri driving the conversation. She kept the conversation going even long after all their food had disappeared and their coffee cups were empty. She was complaining to him about something Wooyoung did, and that’s when she noticed it. Seonghwa was laughing with her, yes, but not in the way he normally was. She felt like he was really observing her, and his smile was sweeter than usual. His sweater was pulled up enough to give him sweater paws, which she only noticed because he was resting his cheek on his hand, his elbow on the table. His dark, neatly styled hair was covering his eyes where Gyuri could see them, but not to the point where she could really figure out the expression on his face other than his breathtaking smile making him seem so much happier than he had been in a while. Her heart was beating so loud that she was worried that he would hear her heart pounding against her ribs; but he was sitting across from her, so he definitely couldn’t tell.

They ended up leaving the bistro right as the sun was setting. Gyuri was about to ask Seonghwa if they should head home, but he started walking in a different direction and said, “Let’s go for a walk.”

Gyuri didn’t know how to oppose that, so she nodded and walked alongside him. They reached a park with a beautiful garden that actually had flowers blooming despite the harsh weather of November, a path to walk through the orange-hued trees, and a playground with children enjoying their lives. Gyuri couldn’t help but smile— she wasn’t overly fond of children, but just seeing the way they played made her nostalgic of the days when life wasn’t so complicated. She felt her heart ache.

Along with her heart aching was the bad feeling returning to her gut. She looked to Seonghwa to see him just looking straight ahead of them at the path through the trees. They didn’t utter a word to each other as they both found their feet leading them to the path. Gyuri wanted oh so badly to say something to relieve the building tension between them. She didn’t want to know what was coming for her despite basically knowing what was going to happen. She’d seen it in all the dramas and tv shows; it was such a cliche that she found it hard to believe that she was now living the cliche.

She felt his fingers wrap around her arm and pull her aside, Gyuri losing her footing and nearly falling right into Seonghwa’s chest. There was a runner coming their way, and she definitely would have collided with the guy had Seonghwa not pulled her aside.

“Thanks,” she croaked out; great, now the anxiety was pouring out of every crevice of her body.

Gyuri leaned back and tried to get her arm out of Seonghwa’s grasp, but he held on the slightest bit tighter. Her heart thudded wildly in her chest as his hand moved up towards her face. She didn’t dare close her eyes, and it was a good thing she didn’t because all he was doing was brushing a leaf out of her hair. Gyuri laughed awkwardly and smoothed her hair in the exact spot Seonghwa moved the leaf from, only for her to place her hand on top of his. She looked up to see his intense, focused gaze. Their eyes met, and in that moment, Gyuri forgot how to breathe. She took in all of his beauty and felt her heart go even faster as she still forgot to breathe.

Seonghwa pulled her in slightly closer— only the tiniest bit. His hand moved from her hair down to her cheek. She felt his fingertips trail along her neck tickling the nape of her neck. His face came in closer slowly.

Gyuri was frozen. She closed her eyes tightly as she felt his soft lips press lightly against hers. He moved away for a split second before kissing her a little more lovingly. She did not dare move as he leaned away. She opened her eyes to see him smiling softly at her, and she immediately felt tears spring to her eyes. His hand that was holding onto her arm slipped down so that he was barely holding her fingertips, and his other hand completely moved away from her body. Gyuri felt like every spot on her body that he touched grew hotter by the second.

When Seonghwa exhaled, Gyuri looked up at him again. She hoped that he had just kissed her out of curiosity, that he wasn’t going to say what she thought he was going to say. However, like the cliche, he said something she really didn’t want him to say with that soft smile still on his face. “I’ve been wanting to tell you since our senior year in high school, but I really like you. I can’t imagine spending a day without you. Not seeing you when I was stuck with Bora was horrible, and I hate that I listened to her lies… But I know now, and I’ve learned from my mistake. I should have told you that I liked you before she entered our lives, but I kept quiet. I kept quiet for so long because I was worried you wouldn’t feel the same way about me. I was insecure. Now, all I know is that I want you to know how I feel.”

“Hwa…” Gyuri’s voice wavered. “If you really liked me all this time, then why’d you say all those nasty things about me to my face?”

“It was all because of Bora. She was the one shoving poison down my throat. I’ve never once thought of you like that. You’re my best friend, Gyu.”

Gyuri stepped back slightly and shook her head. There were many thoughts revolving in her mind, one of them being Seonghwa kissing Bora and how happy he looked with her. In their seven years of friendship, not once did he look at her like that, so she couldn’t believe a word he was saying. She remembered how traumatizing it was for him to call her those horrid names and walk out on their friendship so easily for that girl. “…You really have no idea how much you hurt me,” she managed to say out loud.

“I’m sorry, Gyuri. I truly am so sorry. Please forgive me. You’re everything to me. Everything and more.”

Seonghwa wrapped his arms around the girl and left a light kiss on the top of her head. She tried to get out of his grip, her tears falling rapidly. “Seonghwa, please, let go of me… Please stop,” she sobbed.

Ignoring her, he petted her head slowly until she stopped fighting him. She still wanted him to let go, but she lost all the strength she had. Gyuri settled for grabbing his shirt collar and measly pushing against him, only for her head to rest against her chest. She stared at her shoes as Seonghwan’s hug eased up the slightest bit. Her tears were still falling, but she stopped sobbing.

“Let me make it up to you,” Seonghwa’s voice broke slightly.

Gyuri looked up to see tears in his eyes too, making her want to cry all over again. His lips were pulled into a painful frown as his thumb shakily wiped the tears from her eyes. She just couldn’t hold eye contact any longer. Her heart was hurting so bad. She felt like someone drove a stake through her heart and kept twisting it and twisting it. Her mind went blank as she unconsciously wrapped her arms around his waist. A gust of wind rushed past them and knocked more leaves out of the trees, but Gyuri didn’t hear the wind rushing past her ears or feel the leaves falling through the sound of her heart pounding and her body slowly getting numb.

Right at that moment, San popped into her mind. She thought about the way San held her and how he somehow knew exactly how to comfort her in various scenarios. She didn’t feel right in Seonghwa’s arms, and her face did not press into his chest comfortably. She didn’t like the way Seonghwa was petting her hair despite feeling that pet for years. Her body ached to get away from Seonghwa and run to San. She managed to pull away from Seonghwa enough so that he would let go of her. He tried to hold onto her arm or hand, but luckily, she was able to slip out of that.

The two stood in silence, unable to look at each other. Gyuri looked away and dried her tears to the best of her abilities before saying, “I’m sorry, Seonghwa. I don’t feel the same way about you. Not anymore…”

The last part slipped out of her mouth without her realizing it until she heard herself say it. She prayed that Seonghwa wouldn’t pick up on that, and her prayers worked. “It’s fine. I just want you to know how I feel. You don’t have to feel the same way, not yet at least. I’ll wait for you.”

“No. You shouldn’t,” Gyuri shook her head. She wanted to tell him it was because she liked San, but she couldn’t bring herself to admit the whole truth; she settled for part of the truth, “I think we need to stay friends for now. It’s going to take me a lot of time for me to trust you again.”

“I understand.”

He really didn’t, but at that point, Gyuri wanted to do anything to leave the situation. Seonghwa successfully reclaimed her hand and sandwiched it between his hands lightly. Gyuri nearly flinched, but she saw the look on his face— he was sporting the saddest smile, and his eyes glistened with tears. They were silent once again as they looked at one another.

“I, uh, think I should head home,” Gyuri whispered.

“Okay…”

Silence again. Not a single person moved.

“Can I at least walk you home?” Seonghwa broke the silence.

Gyuri could only really nod. The two ended up walking home in silence, Gyuri walking a couple feet ahead of Seonghwa. When they arrived at 1024UB, Seonghwa took her hand one more time. Gyuri looked at him sadly; he was not making this any easier for her. They both made eye contact one last time as Seonghwa said softly, “I want you to know how I feel, but that doesn’t mean I want to stop being your friend. Take some time for yourself. I’ll wait for you.”

With that, Seonghwa gave her hand a light squeeze and entered the building before her. Gyuri remained frozen in place from the second Seonghwa left until the elevator he took returned back to the lobby. Numb, she took the elevator to her floor, entered her apartment, set her belongings on the dining table, and made her way to the couch. She sat on the rug in front of the couch and hugged her legs to her chest.

She thought about the kiss he gave her, and then thought about him and Bora. She thought about the way he held her hand and then remembered the first time he introduced Bora as his girlfriend and how he held her hand that day. She thought about him hugging her, him apologizing, his sad smile, his warmth, and then she thought about the rage in his eyes, anger in his voice, the tension in his fists, and the malice in his words when he chose Bora over her. Tears flooded Gyuri’s eyes, but before they could spill, she wiped them with her sweater sleeve. She did her best to keep her sobs as quiet as possible, which was definitely a Herculean task given how much paint every single part of her heart was enduring.

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stellasvault · 7 months

Note

I’m not exactly sure where to go for requests so I’m gonna assume this is okay (I’m new to making requests 😭😭😭) but we all know that Miles grew up in New York and loves the culture there and I just think it would be really funny if he had a girlfriend who was from a very rural southern area and she isn’t used to city life at all. Idk just a silly little thing that popped into my head that I think was cute

ur in the right place don’t worry!! also ur right this is such a funny idea i love it, thank u for requesting! 💜

“sorry, i’m not a city gal”

pairings: 1610!miles morales x fem!reader

warnings: sfw, reader and miles are kinda in a long distance relationship

you loved miles, you really did. you loved everything about him.

his adorable cheeky smile when he was genuinely happy, the way he awkwardly held your hand when he was feeling clingy. there was just one thing you didn’t understand:

how did he live in such a large and loud place?

you had grown up in a country area where everyone was spread out and cars were consistently used to go basically.. everywhere. so it was definitely a change when you first arrived in brooklyn with no idea where you were going. you were fresh out the train, dusting yourself off and adjusting your headphones.

you already didn’t like this place. did people seriously just be this disrespectful and live with it? chewed gum and stickers blanketed the walls and ground, and you swore you heard the sound of tiny feet scurrying. rats? blegh, you didn’t even want to think about it.

ok.. you thought, just find his apartment, and walk up to his floor. that’s it. you reassured yourself, looking at your cell to remind yourself of the directions.

it took lots of turns, retracing your steps, and asking strangers who had no interest in you, but you made it. you looked up at the tall building blanketed in graffiti.

what if they talk in city slang and i don’t understand? you panicked, biting your freshly-manicured nails. or what if miles decides he wants to break up?! you got yourself even more riled up with your horrible scenarios, fidgeting with your phone.

your panicking was interrupted by your phone’s familiar ringtone, vibrating in your palm. you picked up, still nervous. you perked up as you heard the voice you loved so much: the voice of your boyfriend, miles.

“mi amor, you okay?” he spoke into the phone, obviously anxious to talk to you.

you smiled at his usual awkward reaction. “yeah miles, i’m fine. what’s up?” your visit had been planned for days, carefully organized so that it would fit both of your schedules.

he sighed. “my parents, they won’t let us go out until they talk to you…” he trailed off apologetically, knowing talking to rio and jeff could be a challenge.

you gasped sharply. again?! what do they want this time? you thought to yourself, ridden with fear.

“hey, i can feel you being nervous from all the way over here!” he laughed into the speaker, it was almost like you could hear his stupid grin. “it’s fine. they just want to make sure you’re ‘respectful’ or whatever.” he reassured you.

you felt a smile tugging at your lips, your boyfriend was too adorable for his own good. you sighed in a mockingly dramatic way. “fine, if you insist.” you heard him mutter ‘yes!’ in victory, making you giggle.

“see you soon?” he asked rhetorically.

“soon.” you repeated excitedly, before rushing up the stairs of the apartment.

—————————————————————————

the last hour had been a blur of sweating nervously, having laughing attacks, and sneaking tight squeezes of the hands when mrs. morales & captain morales weren’t looking. you couldn’t even count the amount of times mrs. morales had corrected you on her and her husbands names.

you now sat at the top of the apartment. it was dark, but the lights of the city illuminated the sky beautifully. miles had shared this was one of his favorite places to think, his favorite place, however, was where his late uncle told him how to spray paint.

“it can’t be that bad!” miles laughed, playfully shoving your shoulder.

you sucked your teeth. “i’m afraid it is that bad.” you placed the piece of scrap paper even closer to your chest, making sure it was completely hidden.

“if you show me, i swear i’ll show you my sketches!” he promised, waving around his chunky sketchbook in his hand.

you debated whether not to give in, all the outcomes running through your head. but, the lingering curiosity got to you, you knew you had no choice.

“if you laugh, all those precious figures of yours are going straight out of the packaging.” you warned him with gritted teeth. the anger you showed was hiding your plain anxiousness. miles absolutely adored art, you knew that. but what if yours wasn’t good enough?

he shrugged, confident that he wouldn’t let out a single chuckle. you slowly turned around the white paper to reveal a sketch of miles. in the picture, a slight smile was tugging at his lips, and his eyes seemed to shine through the paper somehow.

he almost immediately tugged the portait into his hands, observing it silently. “wow..” was all he could say.

you squirmed slightly. all his face showed was that he was definitely focused, but did he like it?

“mami, this is amazing.” he turned his head to look at you in awe, but his expression showed he was getting a burst of energy. “how did you hide this from me? you always insist you never want to draw, but there’s no way you’re bad at this!” he laughed, grabbing one of your hands with his free one.

you tried to decipher whether he was just trying to be nice or if he was being honest.

“so let’s see that sketchbook.” you smirked. his face scrunched up in anger.

“i hate you..” he muttered under his breath as he flipped through his book.

“and i love you.” you cupped his face and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek.

—————————————————————————

AHHHH I LOVE MILES ☹️☹️

thanks for reading! likes and reblogs mean the literal world to me <3

•☘️☘️☘️

#across the spiderverse #atsv x reader #miles morales #earth 42 miles x reader #miles morales fluff

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sarahivess · 11 months

Text

WARNING: LONG RANT AND EXPLANATION

I feel like I have to stand up for myself now when I’ve seen the way some of the people in this fandom have been spreading rumors about me on Twitter.

I’m going to take this from the beginning.

In November, I was kinda new on Twitter. I remember seeing a tweet in my feed, it said “Let Robin say lesbian in season 5” and to me, who lives in Sweden, the word lesbian isn’t a very “bad” word. It’s actually a very common and normal word here, and we have a bunch of movies and tv-shows when lesbian girls and women simply say: I’m lesbian! So to me, I had NO IDEA that in the US, it’s seen as a “bad” word and that’s why the fans wanted her to verbally say it. I totally get that now, but I wasn’t aware back then. Silly me then made a comment, because a very cute and funny little moment popped up in my head and I felt like: AH I need to write this. It was something along with:

“Or gay, because imagine how cute it would be if Will came out as gay, and Robin would say “I’m gay too”, and then a stunned Dustin (or someone) would say “Okay, so while we’re at it - does anyone else want to come out of the closet?” And then Mike slowly raises his hand.”

I didn’t think much more about it, and the next time I logged into Twitter I had gotten like 50 qrts with: LOADS of death threats, gifs with people murdering people, people calling me lesbophobe, people mocking my grammar, my age, people saying weird things to me about Will etc. I was in such shock, I deleted the tweet right away and had a panic attack. What the hell just happened? How did that made me a lesbophobe? I’m bisexual myself, and I LOVE lesbians. I have also a bunch of wlw ships that I love. But all that shit just because I didn’t know that the word lesbian was very uncommon for americans to say in American media and how they wanted to change that.

Anyways, I deactivated my Twitter because all these horrible rumors about me triggered my suicidal thoughts (I suffer from depression), I made a new one and people figured me out right away so I changed alias and pfp/header but people still figured out it was me.

I blocked every single toxic person I came across, a few months passed and one day I was on Twitter again. This time, it was about an analysis of a scene in Stranger Things. Me and an iconic Byler here on tumblr were analysing the scene when everyone says goodbye at the end of season 3. First, Mike looked uncomfortable af when El kissed him, and later on he looked uncomfortable when she was close to him, hugging and touching and making a forehead touch. In one of the gifs, to ME it looked like the hand movement from El was kinda harsh when they made that forehead touch and I just couldn’t understand how people thought it was cute. It was a personal opinion and just a harmless analysis. Both me and this other person were also saying “Nothing against El though, she’s a kid, but I guess if the roles were reversed - if Mike would be the one to kiss El with her not kissing back, with open eyes, looking uncomfortable and shocked, I guess people would have accused him for SA or something. Not that we did, but we know that it would look a lot more bad if Mike was the one who kissed her and not vice versa simply because of the statistics. WE NEVER ACCUSED EL FOR SA. We both love her and she’s my favorite female character in the show. I just don’t like the SHIP Mlvn and I didn’t get how people thought that scene was cute. It was simply an analysis, nothing more. Not an accusation. Not a hate post. That post had over 200 likes and LOADS of reblogs with people who thought the same. But still only me and my friend were attacked. That also lead to ANOTHER accusation: of me being antisemitic. Why?

In year 2006, I first started my YouTube channel. I was very interested in learning how to edit, so thanks to tutorials I learned by myself how to edit. I was 14 years old when I read Anne Frank’s diary for the first time and I saw so much of myself in her. I also loved the way she described her relationship with Peter in the diary, so I watched “Anne Frank: The Whole Story” from 2001 and thanks to my family I could get that movie on my computer so I could make tribute videos of her since she inspired me so much, to never give up on my dreams and to ALWAYS follow my heart and believe that every person is truly good at heart. I made my own trailer for the movie, because there was none to be found on YouTube. My edits became very popular for being back in 2007, and soon loads of people found them. 90% was so happy I made these tributes, that I let the memory of her and all the people who tragically was murdered by the nazi’s back in the 30/40’s live on. But there was also a bunch of REAL antisemitics who called Anne a bunch of horrible stuff in the comments, people who claimed the holocaust never happened etc and I was defending her and the other victims for dear life. I was so proud of my edits, like I said: I was 14 years old and she was my biggest inspiration. My parents also watched these and they didn’t think they were problematic in any way so of course I trusted them and their moral.

And yes, I also made two tribute edits of her and Peter (I didn’t even knew about the term “shipping” back then) but this person on Twitter said I was making “ship edits” about Anne Frank. I have made all of my old videos private now, mostly because of the bad quality but also because of this person who now made me embarrassed of them instead. I wouldn’t make these edits today. Here’s a glimpse of one of them:

Is this antisemitic in any way?

Anyways, because of this person + a lot of others, this made me and my friend to eventually deactivate our tumblr accounts. I hade SO much going on in my personal life back then too, so this was just too much. They found out things about my family situation and that made me freak out, I was threatening them with the cops just because they were attacking and stalking me and my family on a personal level. They were harassing me on TikTok. On DM. On Twitter. People were leaving me and I felt like shit. Luckily there was a bunch who still were standing by my side through all of this and I am SO grateful for you all. Never forget that, you guys made me come back here.

Also, now when one of my tweets became popular on Twitter, of COURSE these people found me and started spreading these rumors again. I found that out from some of my friends here, sending me ss.

I just can’t fucking believe these people. All because of a silly little tweet which ended up in a total DISASTER.

End of rant. I hope at lease some of you understand.

#angelwithnightmares #byler blog #priv rants

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thirtysevenodddogs · 8 months

Text

Teenage Dream Ch11

MATURE CONTENT 18+

Pairings: Main-Joel Miller x Ofc/Reader/You (reader has a name)

Secondary- Joel x Tess / Mentioned- Ellie x Riley, Tommy x Maria

Fic Warnings: 30/y Age Difference, Joel is 48, Reader is 18, Underage for Ch1 (reader is 17), Unprotected Sex, Oral Sex, Vaginal Sex, Anal Play, Use of Sex Toys, Outdoor Sex, Squirting, Sex Tapes, Infidelity, Rough Sex, Spitting, Face Slapping, DV, Pregnancy, Spanking, Daddy Kink, Anal Sex.

Word Count: 10.5k+

AU-No Cordyceps Outbreak/Sarah is alive

BFD!Joel Miller

Joel Miller is having an affair with his daughters' best friend.

You can read the rest of this fic in my AO3 -> In Madness

Notes and reference images can also be found on Ao3

💕Boyfriend💕: 'We need to talk'

Your stomach sinks, and you feel a cold shiver run down your body.

And to think you had been so happy when you felt your phone buzzing in your pocket, you'd actually felt annoyed that you had to wait all through Mrs.Dyer's class to be able to get it out so she wouldn't take it from you, your giddiness and eagerness to get out of class right as the bell went off was such that you'd almost left all of your stuff, if it wasn't for Riley catching you attention, you would have left the class bare handed, your book and laptop completely forgotten, not even put away in your backpack.

Now tho, it was as if someone had walked by with a push pin and popped your little happy bubble.

Joel hadn't responded to any of your texts since yesterday morning, not even to comment on your photo like he normally would have done, he hadn't even looked at most of them until very late at night, or maybe early this morning, You're not exactly sure, you just know that by the time you got back home from your apartment and went to bed, they were all delivered, but not all read.

You had fallen asleep feeling a little hurt and worried, but you figured his important day hadn't gone all that great, he had told you on Tuesday, how he had something REALLY important to do the next day so he wouldn't be able to see you, he had kissed you goodbye and promised he'd be home "...Thursday sweet girl, I'll be here before you get back from school" and he had walked you all the way to your car, kissing you again pushed up against de driver side door, and well... Thursday, was today.

And you had been so eager too, to see him and give him the gift you had planned for your anniversary, and you kind of figured he didn't even know it was your anniversary today, but you knew it wasn't his fault, he was tired and so worried about work and just, life, all the time, of course, he wouldn't have time to be counting the days like you were, and you had hesitated this morning, when you noticed he hadn't replied to anything, not even to just say good night or to give you his usual morning greeting accompanied by some random emoji he just liked that day because he didn't really know what any of them meant, to even tell him what today was.

And now, this...

His words cut deep into you, and you feel like you could cry because you know there's only one thing they can mean, You've seen it before, in all your shows and your favorite movies, the same line, followed by the whole 'is not you, it's me' schpiel, and you really thought you had more time, you really thought your love story was going to be longer, would have a happy ending.

Such a fool.

You don't realize you're actually starting to tear up until Ellie's shaking your arm "Jen? You alright?" she asks, and you lift your gaze from your phone then, sniffling and wiping at your eyes, you don't even know how long you've been standing in front of your locker, Riley must have called Ellie and Sarah over at some point and you feel even sadder because they don't know, they can't know, not really, so you just shake your head and smile, wiping at your eyes "Sorry" you say softly, sniffling again "Just some stupid boy" you say, trying to shrug it off, and then you curse the horrible timing of the situation as you hear a fake laugh and a grating voice chime in from two lockers down.

"Ha! Trying to get with another girl's guy again?... Slut" Ellie rolls her eyes, but it's Srah's voice that cuts through "Shut up Courtney!" she says, and all three of your friends start pulling you away, you all have a free period next anyway, and you just don't feel like dealing with Courtney and whatever her deal is, she's been bugging you since the Halloween party, but it's been getting worse lately, a lot worse, and is not like it's your fault that her boyfriend came on to you that night, you barely even remember the guy and you're pretty sure you shot him down, even if you can't remember much, you do remember pulling your head back when he tried to kiss you.

You realize, while you're sitting on the bleachers in the track field pretending to pay attention to your friends, that she's not half wrong, you came on to Joel, you kissed him first, you begged him to have sex with you, you crawled into his bed... a man who is taken, in a committed relationship long before you had even met him, and you don't really know Tess, but you're pretty sure she has been there at a few house parties, and birthdays, and maybe a few Miller family dinners you think, and she seemed... perfectly lovely.

Maybe he's right to want to end things with you.

Who would want to be with a slut?

Joel wakes up in... increments.

Stretching his limbs until he can hear his joints crack and pop, his head throbbing, his stomach feeling like it's turned over in itself, and his alarm keeps blaring.

Every day there seems to be a new aching pain, in his back, his knees, his head... his soul.

"Nggh... Aaagh!" He grumbles and yawns, loud and long, he brings his hands up to his face to rub the sleep away from his eyes, smacking his lips and sticking his tongue out, opening his mouth until he can feel and hear his jaw pop too.

Everything feels out of place, his body and his mind completely detached from one another as he lays there, just staring at a small spot of humidity on his roof, a reminder just like the crack he saw downstairs, that his house is getting old, just like him, both their foundations ricketty and creaky, whining with every movement, worn out by the elements, age spots all over the paint... all over his skin.

"Fuuuuck" he sighs, finally grabbing his phone and hitting snooze on his alarm, sitting up with a groan, another reminder of his age, and getting out of bed. He doesn't even know at what time he finally went to sleep, he remembers switching from his concoction of Fireball and Jaeger to a couple of beers with Tommy, and then pretty much just pitch black and the warm cozy feeling of his bed.

He looks down at himself and grumbles in disgust, he's still wearing the same clothes he had on yesterday, and he smells of a combination of vomit and sweat and the sickly sweet scent of the Prada perfume Tess loved to wear, it's fucking awful, he strips his bed and his pillows along with his clothes, and tosses it all into the laundry basket at the foot of his bed.

He takes the entire basket with him as he leaves the room, grabbing a towel from the linen closet and knocking on his kids' doors "Any dirty laundry not in the hamper by the time I'm out of the shower, you guys are doing it on your own" he shouts when he hears the grumpy groans of his daughters waking up, setting the basket down in the middle of the hall and stepping into the bathroom.

He stands in front of the mirror, just like he had done a few weeks ago, and he sees... the same thing. Nothing's changed, not really, he's still aware that he's no bad looking, he's not even that old really, but what he's looking at and how he feels are two very different things, he's tired, he's stressed, he has a job that drives him crazy most days and too many worries to count.

he leans against the counter, just over the sink, looking into his own eyes, worn and old, bags and wrinkles making his lack of sleep very evident, and just thinking about having a baby, starting everything over again, he doesn't know if he can do it.

He sighs and stands back up, rubbing at his face to get the gunk out of his eyes before slipping out of his boxers and into the shower, his body moving almost on its own as his mind fires a mile a minute, reminiscing about everything from the moment Olivia told him she was pregnant in between huge smiles and happy tears waving three different positive home pregnancy tests in the air and running into his arms as soon as he'd walked through the door of the little San Antonio appartment they had only just moved into, to the moment Sarah was born.

All the sleepless nights, the constant crying, the figuring out what colic was and when to feed her and when to change her and when to hold her and... when she was just being a manipulative little baby girl who wanted attention and knew screaming would get her anything she wanted.

He thinks about the moment they brought Ellie home, just a few days over one year old, he thinks about how Olivia cried for days when she wouldn't nurse from her, how she felt like she was failing her brother who had entrusted her to care for his baby, he thinks about how she went so quiet, and withdrawn, and how she stopped nursing Sarah too, he thinks about how he had to take care of all three of them on his own, feed them, bathe them, hold them... love them.

And he thinks about walking into their brand new home two years later to find it empty of all her things and a note that just said 'I'm sorry Joel' and that his babies were next door with Mrs. Adler, written just like that too, not Sarah and Ellie, just... 'your babies'.

He's going through the motions of his morning routine on autopilot, trimming his beard and brushing his teeth, getting dressed without even looking at what he's wearing, and running the laundry downstairs to get the first load going before his girls come down for breakfast.

And he thinks about how difficult motherhood was for his ex-wife, over a year she was gone, no phone call just to let him know she was ok, not even a sign of her at all before she came back begging for forgiveness on Sarah's fifth birthday. He thinks about how hard it will be for Tess.

In the cold light of day, he knows that what he did to Tess was wrong, he knows he reacted horribly, and said things he didn't mean... He thinks about when his girls were ten and he got served divorce papers at a soccer game from a woman he still shared a roof with, and he doesn't regret ending the relationship at all, but he knows he has some damage to repair.

And there's a very important conversation he needs to have.

He's in the laundry room, setting the second load to rinse while Sarah and Ellie are in the kitchen having breakfast when he finally reads all the messages you had sent him yesterday, just short little bursts of thoughts you had throughout the day and cute little complaints about how much you were gonna miss him all day and how you couldn't wait to '..kiss you tomorrow, baby, I love you!', and he can picture your little pout so perfectly, your gorgeous lips, your pretty eyes...

Two hours later, sitting behind his desk at work he still hasn't found the correct words, 48 years old, and he still doesn't know how to do this, so he just tells you that he needs to talk to you and he knows that he'll be able to find the right words when he has you back in his arms again.

He sends Tess the same message and just hopes for the best.

You spend the next few hours feeling sad and unsure.

Almost sick, and you wish the anticipation of heartbreak was a good enough excuse for you to blow off class and go lay down in the nurse's office until the last bell rings and you can go home and just cry in your bed wrapped around your pillow.

But is not, and you can't.

So you just sit there through lunch and then through third and fourth period, you smile at your friends' jokes and you nod at their comments and you pretend you're not dying inside, you're so distracted and in your own head that you just agree on instinct when Sarah and Ellie invite Riley and Abby and you to the last pool party at their house before their dad... Joel, your mind is quick to correct, empties it out, and shuts the deck over it for winter. It'll be a blowout, they tell you, and you know, you've been to the past two Autum barbeques, the Millers do know how to throw a nice party.

You just hope it won't be awkward after Joel breaks up with you, and you wonder for a moment if she'll be there... Tess. You wonder again if she's always been.

You wonder if she has been at any of them, and you just never noticed. You frown a little, thinking back, and you realize you don't even know how long Joel has been with her, you're pretty sure it's been a few years at least, but try as you might all you can remember from those events is Joel, his friendly smile, his tender touch, the way he accepted you into his home and treated you so sweetly, Joel at birthday parties, Joel chaperoning school trips, Joel, Joel, Joel... and no one else, you've liked him for so long, and now...

You look at your friends, still talking excitedly about the party, and you feel worse because for a month you haven't even considered how they would feel, or what you would even say, if either of them found out about what you've been doing with their father, what you've been letting him do to you, and the truth is that they disappear completely from your mind the second Joel crawls between your legs.

In your fantasies, they don't care, they're overjoyed for you and for him, and you all get your happily ever after, in reality tho, you know that if they ever found out about the way he touches you, the way he kisses you, if they ever knew how much you love every single thing you do together, they would hate you, and worse, they would hate him.

And maybe Joel is right, you do need to talk.

You should be more mature about this, you decide, mature like the woman he sees you as, and not think like a kid and get in your feelings over a text, so you sit up straight and you smile at your friends and you push the guilt and the doubt and the fears as far down as you can, you want to give him the benefit of the doubt, he LOVES you, and you believe him.

And no matter what, you'll be at the apartment after school, you'll cook the meal you want to cook, and you'll wear the outfit you have planned.

And you'll wait for him.

It's barely 3 p.m., and he's already on the road.

He feels jittery like he drank too much coffee, and he still hasn't really figured out the right thing to say, he doesn't even know if you'll be there, he hopes you will be, but he knows his text wasn't exactly warm and fuzzy, and you never replied to him, and he's still coming to grips with what he has to do, what he has to say.

He realizes he's scared, and for the first time in a long time, he has to make a decision that's gonna end up with someone he cares about getting hurt, even more... He already hurt Tess and he has to figure out how to fix that, and he'll get right on it as soon as he figures out how to tell you that he got her pregnant.

And that's a whole other thing, he's fine with it now, it happened, and he's dealing. Still doesn't mean he wants a kid or that he's ready to become a father again, he really isn't, he thought that part of his life was done and over with, he was 29 when Olivia got pregnant, he was young and strong and excited for his future, now tho? He's tired and old, and worn out.

And all he really feels excited about is the prospect of getting to spend a couple of hours at a time with you wrapped up in his arms, his heart starts raising just at the thought of it, and his stomach feels all fluttery when he takes the turn into the building's parking lot and sees your car already parked there, he wants you so much, he loves you so much, and... he's gonna break your heart.

He can't stand the thought.

He parks just a few spaces away from where your car is, and he sits in his truck for a moment, and he pulls out that tiny picture, all creased and tattered and he has that thought again, of how he wishes the baby was inside of you instead, and not for any selfish reasons like he had yesterday, but because the idea of a future with you doesn't scare him at all, it doesn't make him feel trapped, he stares at his kid and he knows he'll love him or her as much as he can, eventually, but with you, he's sure he would have loved it immediately.

He sighs and puts the photo away in his wallet, and he steps out of the truck, determined, and he knows in the end, this is what's best for you, you don't need the burden of his mistakes, you don't need the burden of his old age. You don't need him, not really.

Not as much as he needs you.

The elevator ride up to the apartment takes less than 3 minutes, but it still feels like an eternity, because he doesn't want to do this, he doesn't want to hurt you, and he doesn't want to lose you.

He takes a deep breath and pushes his key into the keyhole, he saw your car, yes. There's still that lingering feeling in the back of his head that when he turns the knob and opens the door you won't be there at all, and he's kinda kicking himself for not sending another text, just to reassure you, but the truth is he doesn't think he could have said anything that would make what's about to happen any better.

He's thinking about how he's going miss you so fucking much when he opens the door to what looks like a rom-com scene, there are candles and rose petals, little chocolates, and strawberry skewers.

"What?..." He frowns as he steps inside.

All the curtains are drawn and the light that is coming through makes everything look dim and soft, there are fairy lights strung up all over, and the coffee table in the living room is set up for two, there's a table cloth and glass flutes and... cheap wine.

The entire apartment smells sickly sweet, like vanilla and sugar. The whole thing feels like Valentine's Day's come early and Joel is very, veeery confused.

"Baby?" he calls out, finally shutting the door and getting out of his jacket as he walks further into the apartment, he notices then, that the rose petals are actually pink and red colored tissue paper as they flutter around the floor with each step he takes.

He's trying to avoid stepping over them, everything looks so... pretty.

He takes in the details, marshmallows, and pillows on the floor and their white duvet thrown over the couch like a little fort, he knows your age, he is reminded of it every day, he sees it in every gesture you make, in every little pout, it's in the sound of your voice and your beautiful, YOUNG body, but this right here, it screams teenager in love... and it is sooo sweet, it really is.

It makes him a little uncomfortable too, because all of a sudden the burden of what he has to do feels much heavier.

He really is going to miss you.

"Baby?"

You hear the door just as you're fixing the final touches to your outfit, his voice follows right after the sound of it shutting closed.

You're in the bedroom, standing in front of the full-length mirror he had bought for you just three days ago, turning your body and tilting your head to make sure everything looks perfect.

The dress you're wearing is bright red, tight around your chest, and cinched at the waist, and the skirt is short and puffy, flowing and bouncing with each twist and move you make, your breasts fall perfectly into the soft cups of the top, and there are lace details all over, in the straps and under the skirt and running up and down the body of it.

Your hair is down in a half pony held by a red ribbon, long dark waves falling over your shoulders, your face is clean of any makeup, your whole body is clean actually. You'd rushed here after school and hopped in the shower, and you had gone over every inch of your body with care, brushed and scrubbed and trimmed... and you had gotten yourself ready.

The moment you decided that you were going to be mature about this whole thing, your day got better, and as soon as the final bell rang at 2 p.m. you were in your car and on your way to the apartment, the rollercoaster of feelings had finally settled into a fluttering at the pit of your stomach, and every once in a while you would glace at the back seat, at the red dress that had only just arrived that same morning on your doorstep and the packed bag that was carrying everything you needed for the day you had planned.

You set everything up while your hair air dried, wrapped up in the huge fluffy robe Joel had brought over from his house, It smelled so much like him and you wanted to soak that up as much as you could, his warmth, his scent, the way he made you feel so safe, so wanted, so... perfect.

You had tried to pour all of that into every detail as you fluffed up pillows and made little strawberry, chocolate, and marshmallow skewers, and you tried to set the mood, it was the middle of the afternoon, so you had drawn all the curtains closed to make it as dark as you could and you'd strung up the fairy lights you had taken off of the walls in your childhood bedroom and you had tried to re-create the feeling from your favorite movie scenes and your favorite love songs into the little space from your front door to your living room.

The perfect romantic setting, to give yourself over completely to the man of your fantasies, of your dreams.

One month, today... 4 months and 3 weeks if you wanted to be exact, almost half a year since he first touched you, and you were going to celebrate that, no matter what, because you're pretty sure how this day is gonna end, and you'll have time to cry about it later, right now tho... You know what you want, and you know you will get it, and afterward, he can talk all he wants, he can give you his excuses, and he can break your heart to pieces.

But first, he'll get his gift, because you want him to have it, because it's always been his.

You take one last look at yourself in the mirror and smooth the dress down just to make sure everything is perfect, and you take a deep breath and let it all go "OK" you whisper and nod at your reflection, and you step out of the bedroom, barefoot and ready.

"I'm here", you say, and you both just stand there, frozen, him still almost at the front door and you just barely into the living room, and you say...

Nothing.

The moment you step out of the bedroom, time stands still for him.

A tiny little strangled sound leaves his throat, and he can't even remember once in his life ever before that the sight of a woman made him WIMPER, that's how fucking beautiful you are.

"Wow" it comes out as a breath, barely a whisper, his mouth is dry and his hands feel clammy and he's fourty-fucking-eight years old, he should be able to have more control, but the sight of you... Fuck.

It brings him down to his knees, and it lifts him back up into heaven, you truly are an angel in your little baby doll dress, with your wild hair falling around your shoulders, your supple skin shimmering in the dim light of the sun and the tiny little light bulbs that are twinkling on and off behind you, you're a fucking miracle made woman.

"Wow", he says again louder, and you giggle and twirl for him "Do you like it?" you ask, soft and innocent, his dick twitches when he notices the red ribbon holding your hair and at the way your little dress flares and flutters giving him a peek at your perky round bottom clad in shimmery red panties, you bend over a little then, just enough for him to see the heart-shaped little peephole on the back.

He is in ruins.

"You look incredible baby", he says, and he honestly feels breathless as you walk towards him, his heart is beating so hard inside his chest he thinks it might stop at any moment, and then your arms are around his neck and your lips are against his lips, and there's that sweet taste he's come to learn is just... you, followed by coconut lip balm.

He loves you so fucking much.

"What's going on sweet girl?" he asks once you pull back, looking down into your pretty eyes "What's all this?" He nods towards the living room, and you just smile, your arms are around his waist now, and he's never really thought about your height difference much, but right now it's so obvious, you look like a pretty little doll in your tiny dress and your little hair ribbon, and he's a beastly man, all big and dusty and dirty from work.

You shrug, turning your head to look at the space you clearly set up with the intention for the two of you to share, on this day when you got all dolled up, for him... and he frowns again because now he feels like maybe he's forgettign something important.

"Is it my birthday?" He jokes and you chuckle, shaking your head and turning back to him "No dummy, that was in September and you know that!" You say poking his chest with a finger and biting your lip, looking up at him, and you look a little nervous "We've been together a month... Today" You say, and look down again. You stare at your hand now resting palm flat, against his chest.

Oh shit!...

He sighs, pulling your body tight against his "Oh baby, I'm sorry sweetheart" he says, kissing the top of your head, you wrap your arms around him again, tight, and you shrug "It's ok you didn't know, I just wanted to do something nice for you" you say softly, kissing his chest softly through his t-shirt.

His resolve almost breaks, he shouldn't do this, not today, you are so sweet and perfect and gorgeous, but now more than ever he knows he can't hurt you by lying, he never wants to do that to you, you deserve the chance to kick him to the curb, to tell him how awful he is, you deserve a lot more than to carry the burden of his mistakes, you deserve so much more than an old, worn out man.

He kisses the top of your head again and he takes a deep breath.

"We really need to talk, baby girl"

There's no going back.

You pout and nuzzle deeper into his chest with a groan.

And all you really want to do is ask why and kick yourself for not buying a dress that was tighter around your boobs, maybe even seetrhough, it's only been a month but you know what Joel likes, your eyes... which had been working just fine, your butt, in your tiny little panties that clearly got him hooked, and your boobs... in that order.

And you really thought the get up at the bending over and the baby voice would have been enough, and you're thinking about maybe just grabbing his hands and shoving them up your dress so he'll get a clue... but, you remind yourself, you have to be mature.

You sigh, still clutching his body, your hands fisted on the back of his shirt "Ok" You say finally, but you don't move, you can't, you'll accept it and you'll listen and you'll nod and you'll try no to cy, but not yet...

"Come on sweet girl", He says and kisses the top of your head again, and he is sooo sweet, he doesn't try to push you away, he just bends a little, his hands running down your back, and he lifts you up in one swift move, you gasp, scrambling a little to drape your arms over his shoulders and wrap your legs around his waist, and you're eye to eye now, looking at his beautiful face. "Hey", he says softly, smiling at you, and you can't help it, you smile back. "Hi" you whisper, and bring a hand over to cup his jaw, running your thumb over the soft stubble you find there.

And he still looks so sad, you lean and kiss him again, just a soft little peck, and you don't even notice when he moves but all of a sudden he's sitting on the couch, and you're shifting your body to sit across his lap and it's time.

So you just let your head rest against his shoulder, your palm back against his chest, you just want to feel him breathing, his heartbeat, HIM.

And you're still scared because you know it's almost over, this is where your movie ends, this is the moment you lose it all, and you think back to the first night after you'd made love, and how back then he was the one who was scared, so unsure and guilt-ridden, sitting down on the edge of his bed trying to convince you of what a bad man he was... You think about what you felt like in that moment, how you thought you were not foolish enough to believe you could have him, to believe he could be yours.

But here you are, proven wrong, because you are a fool, to have fallen so deeply in love.

He's careful not to disturb anything, and even tho your plan didn't work and you're not about to have a cute date where you get to feed him strawberries and he gets to take your virginity, the only one you have left, at least you're in his arms.

With your hand over his heart, your face against his chest, and his hands caressing your body softly, you feel safe, it's still gloomy and sad instead of happy and bubbly like you wanted it to be, but it's not so bad. And when he breaks your heart, maybe he can help you keep it together for a little while longer this way, and you hope he will, you hope he'll hold you for a while, you hope he'll love you for as long as he can before he has to go back to work.

Before he has to walk away forever.

He takes a deep breath then, and you hear the muffled murmur of his words echoing inside his body before you really hear what he's saying, but when you do, when the words finally register, your eyes go wide, and you sit up a little, palm still against his chest, to look at him.

"What?" you ask almost in disbelief, because you're not really sure you heard him correctly.

"I broke up with Tess" he repeats, and he's just about to go on, you hear the start of a but, forming. You don't care, your mouth splits open into a huge smile and you take his lips in yours, because this is NOT the talk you were expecting. You thought he was going to say he couldn't do this anymore, that he loved his girlfriend too much, that he couldn't leave her.

Instead, he's giving you his heart.

He's giving you everything.

"Mmm... Babe... Mmmm"

He moans, trying to speak in the split seconds when your lips break apart with each kiss, he can hardly keep it together, the way you look, the way you feel against him, the way you fucking taste, it's so much, almost too much, but he has to push through it, he has to tell you everything.

"Baby... I'm not finished"

He pants finally, after you break the kiss and stop squirming in his lap, his dick is aching and it's all he can do you keep his hips tucked in so you won't feel the bulge against your body.

You frown "What else is there to say?... You left her" he smiles softly, pushing your hair back a little and he wants to soak this in, the brief moment of happiness, because the quiet and your sadness had been chocking him just a minute ago, but he can't, he can't let you believe that's all there is to this, even if he wishes it was so.

"No baby", he says, shaking his head "I broke up with her, but... I can't leave her" The way your face falls, the confusion in your beautiful bright eyes, it hurts, deep in his chest and low in his belly, and he can't say the words, he just can't bring himself to utter them in this place, your place, it can't be tainted, so instead, he takes one of his hands off of your body, just for a moment and he reaches into his pocket to pul out his wallet.

"What... what is this?" You ask when he hands you the folded-up ultrasound, and he brings his arm back around you as you open it, his lips against the soft skin of your neck "I'm so sorry baby. I'm sorry" he says and you just... stay silent, holding the little black and white image and going back to snuggle into the spot you'd claimed as yours against his body, while you look at it.

He holds you, and just lets you be, for a moment.

He knows it's over, he knows he fucked up beyond repair, and he knows he ruined everything.

And he looks around then, at the way the apartment has changed so much in just a couple of weeks, how you and him and the two of you together, are sprinkled all around, a pair of his work boots sits by the door, next to a pair of your sneakers, and there are a few jackets hanging in the closet by the entrance, the kitchen is now fully packed, with plates and glasses and cutlery, a fridge stocked full with snacks and drinks and actual FOOD, and he knows if he were to walk into the bathroom right now he would see a cute little pink bathrobe hanging from a hook right next to his own, his face wash and your perfume, and the tiny travel blow drier he sometimes likes to use and that you giggled at the first time he brought it over because well... he was taking most of his showers here anyway.

The living room has pictures hanging from the walls now, a huge picture frame with wild horses running hangs right above the sofa, two photos he had taken of you, right after you'd had sex, your beautiful nude body tangled up in those dark green sheets where he had taken you for the first time, he'd joked about wanting to frame them when he'd taken the shots last week, and he had come home on his lunch break the next day to find them tucked into a medium-sized frame, perched on the little shelf he had set up, right next to the book you'd been trying to get through but still couldn't finish, it's an incredible image to look at. His guitar leaning against the wall right below it.

You had brought over a small potted plant on Friday, set it up right next to the window where it would get some sunshine, and you had smiled at him and kissed him when you told him that you were starting to love this place more and more each day... and he was surprised to find, he had started to love it too, mostly tho, he loved you in it.

He was still in his head, thinking about how the bedroom now smelled of you all the time, how his drawers were starting to get full, and how the walk-in closet had an entire rack full of tiny little dresses hanging on it... You were making a home, wrapped inside a fantasy that was coming to an end before it could fully even begin.

"Do you love me?" You ask, finally, after a few minutes that feel like an eternity, and the question catches him off guard.

The heaviness of his confession and the graveness of the situation is not lost on him, and when he looks down into your pretty eyes he can see that it is not lost on you either.

So, he tells you the truth.

"I do", He says, bringing a hand up to cup your pretty face. "I actually really, really do, sweet girl" And he's almost startled to notice that he's choking up, and his eyes are starting to get cloudy.

He hasn't felt like this, in such a long time.

Heartbreak's a fucking bitch.

You nod then, biting your lip, and you look back down at the ultrasound in your hand.

You've been staring at it for so long that you have all the information memorized, 4 weeks and 3 days... yesterday. The flash of a memory, his headboard banging against the wall, her voice moaning his name. Four weeks ago, late at night, in his kitchen, Tommy and you bore witness to the inception of this moment.

Four weeks and 3 days ago was also a full day before you got together so... It's ok, you decide.

He's being honest with you, so open and so sooo honest, and you know it could cost you a lot, but you wanted to know if he's risking anything at all, by telling you.

His response tells you everything you needed, everything you wanted, he is risking just as much as you are, he loves you just as much as you love him, and his hand is still loosely holding your face when his voice, a little broken, and in a whisper, breathes out.

"I love you so much, I wish I could keep you"

And two of his fingers tilt your chin up, so you are looking into his eyes again. "You can" you whisper back, and go with his hand as it leads you, your lips crashing together in the softest, most tender kiss you've ever shared, soft, unhurried, small.

So full of love "It's ok" you breathe against his mouth, the little picture fluttering to the floor, lost in your little pillow fort as you let go of it, your breath mingling with his as you kiss him again "It's ok, Joel" You say, in another kiss, and again, and again, all the fear you had been feeling all day all the dread, draining from your body.

He relaxes too, his shoulders going lax, and his boy melting into the cushions of the sofa as you turn in his embrace, and straddle his hips, you realize that just like you, he had been so scared.

"It's ok" You moan when his hands find the edge of your dress, and grip the back of your thighs, and he's kissing you back harder now, there are tears running down his cheeks, and down yours, the salty taste spreading over your tongues, you grind down against his crotch and he groans, pulling back.

"Aaah" he moans, gyrating his hips and holding you down against them "How are you fucking real?" he pants, bringing you back down into another deep, kiss. "Fuck baby, Mmmm"

"Joel" You whimper when his hands take hold of your ass and squeeze, his fingers dipping into that tiny heart cut-out on your panties "Joel... please" you whine, still grinding against him, and it's like all the sadness and misery and fear are bouncing uncontrollably inside both fo you, colliding with a force as he grips you tighter and you bite down on his lip harder, and you beg...

"Make love to me... please"

He groans, his fingers digging into the flesh of your thighs as he surges forward, "Hold on baby" He whispers before shoving his tongue right back into your mouth and stretching an arm out, bringing you down with him into the bed you had made out of pillows and blankets, under you little duvet fort, you hear the soft thud of the wine bottle you had stolen from your house as it topples over when he pushes away the tray with the glasses and the snacks you had prepared and you honestly couldn't fucking care less.

"Yes!" You moan, when he pulls away from your lips and starts peppering kisses down your neck, nipping and nibbling at your skin as he goes, his huge hands cupping your breast through the soft material of your dress, pushing them together as he kisses his way down your chest, nuzzling his face right between them "Mmmm you're fucking amazing"

He groans, sucking a hickey against the swell of your right breast, both hands still firmly wrapped around each mound, his fingers pinching at your nipples over the red fabric.

"I'm ready baby... Make me yours"

You can't wait anymore, you bring a hand down under your dress and start pushing your panties down, lifting your hips against his body and kicking at your legs to try and flip over onto your belly, your other hand pushing under some of the pillows near the couch, to try and get the bottle of lube you had stashed in there when you were setting up, your fingers are scrambling desperately as his mouth closes around one of your nipples, the soft fabric of your dress pushed under the swell of your breasts, and you feel a gush of liquid drip out of your aching pussy.

"Aaah!! Oohh... Baby, please.. please Joel... take me!"

Your back is arched so high, your fingers tangled in the slik of your panties while your other hand's still palming around to get he lube... your orgasm hits you so hard you don't even realize you're talking.

Still begging.

FUCK!

He doesn't know how you even fucking exist, he doesn't understand how his wildest fantasies became reality, you are so indescribably perfect, so unreal.

"Mmmmm" He moans, suckling at your tit, as you scream and grind against his torso, he pulls off with a loud pop, and moans at the sight, your tits spilling out of your little dress where he pulled at it, your legs spread, and your hand desperately trying to pull your panties off... how the fuck did he get so lucky?

"Fuck baby, yes come on!" He groans, pulling your panties off himself, holding your legs open and just diving right into your sweet little pussy, his lips are barely wrapping around your clit when you whine and start pushing at his shoulders.

"No... noooo" He stops, pulling back and trying to get his control back, you're panting, head's still thrown back, and you're squirming, and you look so out of it, his mind is so clouded and his heart still so heavy, his emotions are in a knott but he doesn't want to hurt you, not ever.

He takes a deep breath and tries to reign everything in, he's heaving, barely able to catch his breath and he's not sure why everything feels so intense, as soon as his body is off of you you flip over, your chest against the little pillow nest, and your knees tucked under you and he sees it then, he doesn't know how he fucking missed it.

"Oooh fuck" he groans, there's a new little toy, crystal and clear, and the way your perfect ass is framed by the frilly red skirt, the fucking way he can see INSIDE of you... He feels fucking faint.

He wraps a hand around his jeans-clad cock and squeezes, he can't tear his eyes away, your asshole is just as pretty and perfect as your pussy, pink and shiny and... fuckfuckfuck, he squeezes his dick harder and shakes his head, he needs to be clear-headed for this, he fucking needs you to be too.

"Shit!" He groans.

"Baby", He says, and his hand is actually shaking but he forces himself not to reach out and touch your perfect fucking ass, if he does, there's no going back and he can't, he needs your first time to be soo good, so perfect.

"Baby come on, talk to me sweet girl" your still groaning and grinding, your hips swaying back and forth, your ass clenching around that beautiful glass plug and your dripping pussy quivering. "Come on sweet girl I need you here with me" he whispers against your cheek, caressing your back, trying to be as soothing as he can, still holding himself back.

"Nnngh Jooooel..." you purr, opening your eyes to look at him, your pupils are blown wide "I'm ready Joel.... please" that fucking baby voice is gonna be the death of him "Shhh... that's good... such a good girl, just keep looking at me baby" he tells you, and slow, soo fucking slowly, he starts moving your body, turning you around, and wrapping one of your arms around his neck, and you catch on, pushing yourself over all the way, wrapping your arms around him "Yes.. come on baby"

His knees pop as he kneels up, but he ignores it, and he scoops you onto his arms, holding your back and your legs under your knees and he forces his body to stand up, fuck the pain, fuck the effort, fuck his age, he's not taking your virginity on the fucking floor.

"Noo baby... I want to" You whine again, and turn your body a little more, latching on to his neck, suckling, and he knows there's going to be a huge fucking mark there tomorrow but he doesn't give a fuck, his dick is throbbing agast the metal of his zipper and his balls feel full and heavy and so fucking uncomfortable with every step, but he makes it into the bedroom.

"Mmm..." You're moaning against his ear, sucking his earlobe into your mouth and everything feels soo hot "Baby, you're killing me" he groans setting you down on the floor, you're clinging to him, your arms still around his neck, and your tight little nipples dragging against his chest, the straps of your dress hanging down over your arms.

"Mmmm fuck you're so fucking hot" He groans as you pull his head down and suck his lip into your mouth, his mind starting to cloud over again when one of your hands falls down to grab his cock through his pants, he hisses, pulling back, his hands holding your face, his thumbs rubbing over your cheeks, and your eyes still look so gone, but you're looking back at him.

And he needs to know.

"Are you sure?"

Are you sure?...

You feel like your body's on fire, and his eyes are so pretty, his hands are so big, you want him sooo much, his cock is twitching under the palm of your hand and you need it, so badly.

You nod, taking a step back and pulling at the zipper of your dress, letting it fall off of your body, and you stand there, naked, and so ready "I want to be yours" you say, and you try to be here with him, just like he asked, just like he wants you to be, but you are so wet and your belly's still tight from coming once already and your ass keeps clenching around your new little toy and you WANT him.

"I cleaned myself", You say, your voice soft as you step over your dress and turn your back to him, leaning forward over the edge of the bed, arching your back, and looking at him over your shoulder, "I did it in the shower, got myself all ready for you"

"Fuuuuck" He groans, his eyes locked on your butt, and you're so glad Barbie helped you because this was clearly the right toy, and maybe if you hadn't worn panties at all this would have happened sooner, you wouldn't have had to be scared, you won't know about his stupid baby... No! you shake your head and push yourself out of that head space, you'll deal with reality when it's time to deal with it.. right now you almost have what you want... he's so close.

"Mmm come on baby, I need you" You purr, and spread your legs, pulling one knee up to start climbing onto the bed, your pussy spreading open, and you smile when you hear the should of his belt buckle coming undone, he curses again and then, he's right there, his naked chest over your back and his hips against yours, his BIG, fat cock, hot and wet sliding against the small of your back.

You have him. He is yours.

He still tries to go so slow, he pushes you fully onto the bed, whispering sweet nothings against your neck and raining kisses over your shoulders, he tells you how much he loves you as his fingers sink between your folds, thick and fast, he fingers you like it might be the last time he'll ever get to do it but is not, it won't be, you won't let it.

"Ooh... Mmm" you moan when he pulls his fingers out of you and taps them against your plug "You got this for me, baby?" He groans against your ear and you nod, "Mmmhm... thought you'd like it" You say, wiggling your butt a little.

He chuckles "Mmm you dirty little girl" he pushes his fingers back into your pussy "Aaahhh... yeeees... yess Jooooel" You push your hips back ridding his hand, and you don't know what comes over you, everything is still so confusing but you want him soo so much, and he's right here, you haven't lost him.

"I'm a dirty little girl, Daddy" and the way he groans at that makes your entire body clench, you knew he'd been holding back on you, and all day you had been worrying about it possibly being the last chance you would ever get, and if you're being honest with yourself... You had been wanting to try it for a while now.

"Oh fuck... I was trying to be nice" He groans, landing a hard slap against your ass check "Wanted your first time to be sweet" another one "But you don't want sweet do you?" his fingers are still pumping in and out of your body and you're so soo close.

"Mmm want it haaard Daddy" you moan, fucking yourself against his hand faster, he bites down on your shoulder at the same time as another slap lands against your butt cheek, the sting of the slap and the pain on the bite and his huge fingers... It's soo much.. too much.

Your orgasm explodes out of your body, you clench so hard you push his fingers out and your back goes taunt, your essence gushing out, spurt after spurt after spurt all over your legs and the bed.

"Fuck yes.... so fucking perfect!" he grabs your hips, and his dick is pushing into your body, and it's hard and fast and you're still coming, his hips hitting against the butt plug with each thrust and it's soo good.

But is not what you want, not yet.

"Ahhh.. Mmm Baby" You moan, rolling your hips, slowing it down, grabbing the back of his head, and pulling him into a kiss "Mmm come on baby, I'm really really ready" You groan sucking his tongue into your mouth.

"I know you want it too Daddy"

He does, he does want it.

And he loves this, he loves it so much when you turn into this needy little sex kitten, he loves making sweet love to you, but when you get like this, incredible things happen, like car sex, and standing up against the wall sex, and ANAL sex...

And you, calling him daddy? Fuck.. he almost came, he had to push his dick into your pussy cause he didn't fucking want to nut against your back, and he's not quite sure what's going on, but you're so hot and you want it so badly and he's aching to have you, and he's still so fucking scared.

He kisses you again, rolling his hips slowly until he comes to a stop, trying with all his might not to come, and it's a struggle when he pulls out, your tight little pussy clinging to him, sucking him in, and the sound it makes when his head pops out, wet and bubbly, you used to blush so much at that... it so fucking hot to him.

"Ok... mm ok sweet girl, lie down on your belly", He says, pushing down softly until you're completely prone, and he takes a second, just to grab the half-empty tube of lube that's in his drawer before he climbs back into bed, his tighs stadlign yours. "Stick your ass up baby" he grabs the pillow from his side of the bed and shoves it under you as soon as you lift your hips, and he can't resist it anymore, he reaches out and grabs hold of a plump cheek, all red and so fucking pretty from the spanking you took, and you really are such a dirty, dirty girl.

He loves you so much.

He puts the lube down on the small of your back and you tens up a little "Shh.. it's ok pretty girl, Imma take care of you" he kisses the back of your shoulder, rubbing your side softly until you relax again, folding your arms up and laying your head on top of them, he kisses your cheek them "I'm gonna take your pretty toy out ok baby, gonna take a real nice look at that pretty hole"

"Mmm ok Daddy" You whisper, you've been all over the place tonight, but he doesn't want to send you spiraling any further "Call me Joel baby. We can play games after okay, but your first time... it's you, and me sweet girl" he kisses a trail down from your shoulders all the way to the little dip at your lower back where the little tube of lube lies, and he pushes up on his knees again. "You're so fucking beautiful, Jenna" He uses your name, to help you get back into a nice headspace, it's you and him right now.

You moan out a quiet little prayer of his name back at him, and he smiles "That's right baby, so perfect" he runs his hand up from your thighs until he's cupping your perfect little ass, so plump and perky, and he spreads you open, his dick bouncing, slapping against the small pouch of his belly at the sight.

It's fucking delicious, the plug is small, about as large as the biggest one of three you'd given him before, and it's snug in there, but the fact that it's clear and he can see your tight little hole gripping it from inside... It's incredible.

You're incredible.

He tells you everything he's doing, he talks you through pulling the little toy out and squirting some lube right into you, and he asks for permission to push two fingers into you, and he soothes and calms you down every time you tense up or get nervous. It's amazing.

"Ok, sweet girl, I'm gonna push just the tip inside ok? just the tip baby" he says, rubbing the head of his cock against your loosened furl, it's still so tight and tiny, but there's a cute little gape from the toy and his fingers, and it's so shiny with lube and your own wetness, and you did such a good job getting all cleaned up for him, it's beautiful.

His eyes roll back into his head at the first push and the way your body gives, sucking the fat bulbous head of his dick in.

He hisses and moans "Mmm... that's it, I'm inside you baby" he whispers, almost in wonder and you whine, squirming a little, your ass pulsing and clenching "Shhhh, shhh you're ok baby, did it hurt?" he asks, and you kick your legs a little, but you shake your head, looking at him out of the corner of your eye where you're still lying over your arms "Feels funny", you say softly, wiggling your butt "Aah... Mmm it feels wonderful for me baby girl, you're sooo perfect" he nuzzles at the back of your neck.

"Gonna push a little more ok" and he does as soon as you tell him it's okay, and you go on like that, little by little, slow and steady, asking and reassuring you that it's all good and you're such a good girl, he groans when he bottom's out, his hips flush with your ass and you're moaning, your hand gripping the back of his head, your back arched. "Mmm you're all mine" he groans, pulling back a little just an inch or so before pushing back in.

"Ahhh... feels good Joel.. so full" Fuck, you're amazing, he's never fucked a girl up the ass who wasn't wincing and complaining and telling him it was too much no matter how much lube he used, no matter how slowly he went... no one ever wanted it again.

You've liked it all the way through, moaning and purring and asking him for more as he entered you so slowly.

You're fucking amazing.

"Aahh"

You roll your hips when he pushes back inside of you again.

It really does feel good, it's tight, and so full, and he was so sweet and so gentle telling you how good you felt from the second his fingers pushed into your butt, to the moment his dick did, it never felt wrong, it never felt bad, it was weird and a little uncomfortable but the more he pushed in and the longer he talked you through, it the better it got.

"Mmm... Joooel" You moan, and he pulls out again, short hard thrusts, in and out, in and out, whispering against your ear the whole time "You are so fucking perfect baby... love this tight little ass"

It went on like that for a few minutes, until you really got used to it, and then it was like he snapped, never pulling fully out of your body, his hips slapping against your ass fast, fast, faaast... and then slow again, hard short thrusts.

It felt incredible, your orgasm started to stir low in your belly, and you realized your pussy had been dribbling steadily, a moist patch of slick forming against Joel's pillow. "Aahhh baby I'm so close" you moaned the next time his hips started pistoning into you "Aaah Joel... I'm gonna come... I'm so close baby"

"Yeah.. come on sweet girl, come with me" he groaned, and you catch just a flash of his hand when he raises it from your hips, and then he's pushing it between your body and the pillow, his slick fingers rubbing your clit fast, so fast. You realize he licked them, so it'd be good for you, and it is... sooo GOOD.

You scream, your orgasm tearing out of you so hard, you feel it all the way from your toes, your legs twitching, you're tummy contracting and his hand is not stopping, and his hips are still going, and his cock is pushing against a spot that makes you feel soo good and you didn't even know it was possible to feel like this from anal... You're squirting again, harder than you had on his fingers, harder than you had ever... you think.

He's moaning and grunting against your ear and then you feel him tense up too, his dick pulsing and a flood of wet, hot, and sticky starts to gush into your body.

It's amazing, soo good, so much.

Everything goes black, and then you hear his voice.

"... Jenna, baby... baby are you ok?"

"Nnngh..."

You're struggling to open your eyes, and you can feel his hand on your body, something warm and wet running between your legs and the bed dipping and jostling with his weight.

"Mmmm... Joel?" You feel the warmth of his arms around you "Shh I'm here baby, You did soo good, sweet girl" He kisses your shoulder and you hold his hand, he brings it up to lay a small little kiss over your knuckles "You ok sweet girl? You where a little out of it for a second there" he says, nuzzling the back of your head, and you feel a little better now, the fog is clearing.

"Mmmm what happened?" you ask, and you muster up all your strength to turn into his arms, you feel drained, and there's a dull ache in your butt and you feel... empty.

You frown, looking up at his face "Did you clean me up?" You ask, leaning over his chest, you expected to feel his cum running down your legs, but you look down and realize your body is wiped clean, your hair is twisted into a loose braid, and there's a huge grin on his face.

"You passed out baby, I got scared for a second but then you started mumbling in your sleep, it was beautiful", he says, pulling you up into a soft kiss. "It was perfect, you're perfect", he tells you, you just look at him.

And you pout, because now the fog is all gone, and your body is calmed down and... he's having a baby.

"You're gonna be a dad", you say, and he's still smiling but it's sad again.

"I am, sweet girl" He pushes the hair out of your face, and you know he loves you, you really do. "I'm so sorry" and you know he is.

You know he's losing just as much as you are, you know both your hearts are breaking.

"It's over isn't it?" you whisper, your arm thrown over his body and his lips against the top of your head, you feel so safe, so loved.

He doesn't have to say anything, he just holds you tighter as your tears start to fall, he keeps your heart held together, just like you knew he would, and you know he'll stay right here, and he'll hold you, for as long as he can, for as long as you let him.

Because you're holding his heart together too.

#mia's fic #the last of us #joel miller #joel miller fic #joel miller smut #joel miller x you #18+#joel miller x reader #best friend's dad #not intended for minors

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