#his death being tragic in its own right because he had an entire life to live and was a kid who up until then thought he wanted to die

[bandtrees]

the “good luck liking this character because all people get out of their arc is the surrounding satosugu” club

shoko

riko

yuta

#babbles #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk spoilers #in Tags #sooo tired of how ppl treat shoko like the only person geto+gojo are important to are eachother #as if their thing wasn’t being. A Trio #like hidden inventory is not just geto and gojo. there is a whole entire third person in that friend group #riko saddens me because (pronoun hcs incoming) his arc is so so tragic and he’s such a good character and YES the impact he had #on geto+gojo emotionally is important in fact that’s the entire reason he exists as a character. but its still saddening to care about riko #and only have people talk about him in the context of his role in other people’s arcs and how his death made geto Sooo Sad and not #his death being tragic in its own right because he had an entire life to live and was a kid who up until then thought he wanted to die #(I LOVE GETO HES ONE OF MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS BUT CAN WE CARE ABOUT RIKO ON HIS OWN… pls…) #yuta here is mostly because jjk0 is just the satosugu movie to some people. But he doesn’t get this treatment As bad as the other two #(hmm shoko and riko in particular i wonder why.. #obligatory I LIKE SATOSUGU I JUST THINK PEOPLE ARE ANNOYING

[valenteal]

I’ve been posting a lot about my thoughts on Dazai’s characterization and motivations but honestly I’ve been dedicating a lot more energy to trying to understand Oda. Dazai is an amazingly complex character but he’s a constant in the story and we know quite a lot about him, comparatively. Oda is incredibly mysterious and much harder to understand. My breakthrough earlier figuring out that Oda had the book has really helped me open my mind to another side of Oda I hadn’t yet considered.

The things is, authors have to be a bit cruel. Oda’s reasoning for not killing because he wanted to be a writer doesn’t make sense, we kill our own characters all the time. We put them through hell over and over for entertainment/to convey a deeper meaning. I think maybe one of the conditions of having the book is not killing directly, or maybe a certain level of removal from the storyline. Like, if you control reality and others lives with the book you’re giving up a certain amount of control physically in the moment.

Oda is a killer. He is friends with killers. And if I’m right about him being the author of the Dark Era he wrote the deaths of the kids. I think his reaction was genuine, I think he really felt like he shouldn’t have the book, that he didn’t deserve to be its author anymore, but I really think that he wrote the story to give Dazai the opportunity and the motivation to get a better life. I mean, I’ve made myself cry with my writing. The most compelling stories are full of tragedy.

Oda was a child assassin. He was a writer. He was a mafioso. But most of all he was Dazai’s friend.

Wait! Holy shit idea!

Okay so Natsume had the book before Oda, but he was definitely following Dazai around before he got the book so we know there’s already a connection there. I’ve been wondering why Oda was so attached to Dazai. But Natsume wrote the story he adored, the third installment which Oda finished was The Book. But what did Natsume write about? What exactly were the books Oda loved? What if it was Dazai’s story? What if Oda knows Dazai so well because he read his life story over and over and yearned to give him a happy ending? What if his whole motivation was to finish the story in a satisfying way? And everything from the orphan’s existence to Ango’s betrayal was to create an open ended story in which Dazai could potentially have have a better life?

Oda is such an incredible character. He’s full of contradictions until you actually start thinking of him as an author. We authors have strange minds, we love our characters but we put them through so much. Because we wouldn’t love them if we didn’t make them struggle, make them realistic and deep and meaningful. Oda knew the kids were going to die, he wrote it. But he got attached like anyone would. But he was done writing the story, all that was left was for it to play out. So he passed ownership of the book to Dazai and went to play his role.

Fuck I’m getting emotional omg Odasaku is wonderful. I don’t even care if the entire theory is wrong, I’ve figured Oda out with the information I was given and filled in the blanks. Asagiri himself wouldn’t be able to make me give this theory up.

Oda isn’t a good person with strong morals the way he presents himself. He does that to fill the mentor roll for Dazai and to get Dazai to make the desired decisions. He just a fan who was given control of the story by the original author and basically used all the writing tools ever to create a story in which the character he loved but who was tragically doomed and seeped in darkness could find some happiness. Just like anyone writing a fix-it fic. Accept his fix is canon.

Holy shit I’m a genius.

Don’t come at me you have no idea how proud I am of this! Either I figured out the most confusing character ever written or I have created a genius explanation that nothing will ever top (for me anyway).

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd theories #oda sakunosuke #bsd odasaku #bsd dazai #dazai osamu #analysis #writer rambles #im so proud of this rn #im either a great detective or a great writer or both #the book bsd #bsd natsume #author odasaku #author dazai #but also #main character dazai #fan odasaku #imagine becoming the new author of your fav unfinished series #but its real and to tell the story you actually need to kill real people #holy shit

[goodfish-bowl]

A Way of Death

Ectoberhaunt Day 12: Way of Life/Cause of Death

AO3 Link

Summary: Everything had been going pretty well for Danny, all things considered. Things being his own body buried just outside of town. Joseph Brown is having a decidedly horrible day, and really hopes this ends in a court case. 

Warnings: Description of corpse

Words: 1149

Notes: I do love me some Corpse AU. As a treat.

@ectoberhaunt

The Coroner, Joseph Brown, looked down at the body they’d been given, then at the info sheet. He’d ran the standard series of tests, like protocol demanded, and his gut wrenched. He’d never dealt with a John Doe corpse before, not like some of the bigger city morgues. His role and title in the APPD was more cosmetic than anything else. Since the ghost arrived over a year ago, human crime had been at an all time low, hell, they probably had the lowest numbers in the country. He mostly worked in the funeral service now adays.

The body in front of Joseph was small, not much larger than a child, and the tests confirmed as much. Male, young, probably early teens, and had been buried in the ground for at least a year at this point, probably since right before the ghosts had shown up. There weren’t really any leads at this point, but it wasn’t his job to find leads, just make notes of what he finds. Which is what he’d been doing.

The blanket the teen had been wrapped in was already sealed away into a specimen bag, faded and tattered from it’s time in the ground. It looked like it had once been space themed, and had been tightly, almost lovingly, wrapped around the teen, liked he’d been tucked into his grave. Which made no sense, since he had been found in an unmarked grave on the outside of town, not too far from a well known stargazing spot. It was dichotomic. Joseph had noted as much in his report. The clothes too, Joseph noted, were odd. They were definitely the ones the teen had died in. They didn’t have the same damage as the body did. It had been a hoodie and sweats, also added to a specimen bag. It really was like someone had lovely put this boy to bed before burying him deep in the ground. It made him nearly sick to think someone could do that.

The body itself had its own issues. He was dealing with a John Doe, with no identifiable features other than Caucasian and black hair, and perhaps a clothing size. Everything else had rotten away during his time in the ground. This surprisingly didn’t stop him from identifying a bit about the boy’s life, nor his cause of death.

Whoever his John Doe was, he had a mild case of malnutrition and some growing problems. Due to what? No clue. Genetic tissue wasn’t usable for something as fine point as that, and Amity didn’t really have the resources for that anyways. A bone sample found the kid’s exact age to be 13-14 years old, which was tragic in its own way. The cause of death had been electrocution.

Joseph had read about electrocution victims in his textbooks, but whatever voltage this boy had been hit with was high enough to cause visible bone damage across his entire left side, along with instantaneously cooking him alive. Kid went out painfully and quickly. It appeared to start in his left hand, probably where he ended up touching some exposed electric whatever, went through his entire body, before exiting from the right foot into the ground. Whatever the kid had been wearing must’ve been protective to some degree, because the voltage seemed to have a hell of a time leaving once it got in. It probably ended up doing more damage than it did good.

On that note, Joseph didn’t think it was murder, this definitely seemed accidental, probably some kids just messing around. But accidental or not, there had been a cover up. He didn’t understand why whoever found the body hadn’t just reported it and gone about things the legal way. They had obviously cared about whoever this kid had been, so why bury him in an unmarked grave?

After a moment, Joseph found a reason. With how young the boy was, on top of the malnutrition and cause of death, a neglect case could be filed against his parents, which would also link into the lack of a missing person’s report matching the profile.

Joseph sighed aloud, thinking to himself, What a way to go.

  Danny had been minding his own business, carrying out his daily afterlife like he typically did.  Barely sleep, go to school, sleep in class, fail his classes, ditch because a ghost showed up, and then sulk around town (a.k.a. avoiding going home for as long as possible). Usually this happened with or without Sam and Tucker. If he was lucky, he’d make it home just before curfew, avoid talking to his parents, and then sneak out again for patrol. Rinse and repeat. It was a shitty way of life, and he knew it, but it didn’t feel like he had any other options.

Danny froze, suddenly feeling sick, almost getting shot out of the sky by his parents in the process. Ignoring the feeling for a moment, he ditched his usual game of ghost and hunter to go find somewhere safe to recover and spill his guts. Usually, he’d keep this up until his parents went home for the night, making sure they left the other ghosts alone, but not like this. He’d mess up.

Danny buckled on the roof of a random building in the old historic district, now dubbed the Neon District. He wasted no time emptying out what little food he’d managed to eat that day. He felt awful, like someone was poking and prodding at his insides. Another wave of nausea spiraled over him, and he fell to his hands and knees, gagging.

Ancients, what was going on? It felt like someone was walking all over his-

Danny’s head snapped up and towards the edges of town. No. It couldn’t actually… He took off at max speed towards the outskirts of town.

The area had always been quiet, and it was far enough from town that it was rarely ever visited. It also just happened to be once of the best places close by for stargazing. His parents used to take him, whenever they weren’t busy with some new invention or project, which happened less and less as the years went by. They hadn’t gone even once since the portal had opened up. He figured it had been a safe spot as long as he kept away from the used area.

Danny touched down in what was blocked off like an active crime scene. The small clearing was covered in powered off cameras and lights, and a hole in the ground in the center of it all. There was nothing but dirt in the bottom of it.

It was gone. His body, which he’d buried in this exact spot, was gone. Danny was filled with a harsh mix of rage and dread. His horrible way of life was about to get a lot more complicated.

#danny phantom #ectoberhaunt22 #EH order #eh chaos #way of life #cause of death #goodfish writes #corpse au #danny literally felt like someone had walked all over his grave

[rillils]

imagine post endgame bucky having to go alone, without someone to support him, to say sorry to all the people whos family he killed and he keeps saying that he didnt have a choice as his excuse

and he keeps thinking that its not a good enough excuse, that hes not good enough

no, you see, you see!! one of the things that made me uncomfortable about their treatment of Bucky, back when I was watching tf*ws, is precisely this

gonna slap this under a cut because BOY I have things to say

I WWILL NEVER STOP BEING MAD ABOUT THIS. I MEAN.

deciding that he has to apologize for all those deaths implies that he murdered those people willingly, while he was perfectly aware of his actions, of their consequences, and just did it anyways. so now, you know, he has to "atone for his sins", or make amends or whatever. so we're just going to send him off to those dead people's relatives to immolate himself because of course that's the only right thing to do. BUT idk, say what you will, this entire concept just sits wrong with me, I can't help it.

like first of all, we're acting as though killing all those people was a conscious choice on his part, as though he were completely 100% in control of himself and actively chose to murder a bunch of people, just because it suited him or something, when we know, WE FUCKING KNOW, WE HAVE BEEN LITERALLY SHOWN THIS, IT'S A RECURRING THEME IN AT LEAST 2 OF THE CAP MOVIES, that THIS. was NOT. the CASE. and fuck anyone who says any different tbh, mcu included

second, they might argue that by walking up to the victims' relatives and apologizing, Bucky's giving them closure or something, but. just. look at this from their point of view, right. as far as they're concerned, this is the guy who murdered their loved ones in cold blood, and he's just! walking free! getting away with murder(s), apparently without suffering any consequences whatsoever for all his crimes and all the grief he has caused. is that REALLY gonna give anyone closure? or is it just going to hurt them more/make them even angrier/unnecessarily reopen old wounds when there's nothing, really, that can heal or soothe them at this point, but rather just make them more painful than they already were????

so, it doesn't give them closure. and it sure as fuck doesn't give him closure, either.

they send him on this horrible, tragic, terrifying, sad errand, and all he gets out of it is torturing himself some more. seeing the pain and the hatred for him on all of these people's faces, the moment he says "yes, it was me, I pulled the trigger, I killed this person you loved". like, torture, yes, torture!! that's all this is!!! that's all it earns him!!! no peace of mind, no sense of closure, no hint of forgiveness! just more pain!!!!!!

just. I just hate this, you know, I just. I really, really hate this. I especially hate how, as you said, the way they insist on him having to personally apologize is just going to make him feel like his own hardships (aka being physically and emotionally tortured until he broke down and had his identity, agency and free will stripped away from him) were just "an excuse". as though a victim (because THAT'S what he is, THAT'S what he always was, a victim himself) needed an excuse for all his suffering. as if he brought it upon himself. as if he was "asking for it".

nah, all of this, it's just going to make his sense of guilt grow stronger and deeper over time, making him feel even more Unworthy (unworthy of love, unworthy of acceptance, unworthy of living a normal life after everything he's been put through, unworthy of friendship, unworthy of being seen as a whole person, as a human rather than a murderer) than he already felt before, making his own pain so overwhelmingly powerful that he might end up feeling like his entire existence is a mistake, and everybody would be better off if he just wasn't around anymore. and that's just so horrifying that I refuse to contemplate it.

#stucky just stucky #personal #like most of the time i feel like they just *hate* him down at the mcu quarters you know #it's like all they're interested in doing with him is just 'hey let's see how much more crap we can throw at this character' #just for funsies lmao #and i'm not even going to touch on what they did to steve (and - by proxy - to bucky himself) or i'll never shut up at all #i'm really sorry i went on a tangent honey #i just have way too many feelings about this 😭😭😭

[showmethesnowplz]

i don't think any media will ever consume my thoughts in the same way as Xenoblade 2's Torna DLC. When you play through the base game, the fate of the Torna party seems tragic on its own, but seeing them for yourself? Going through their entire journey together, knowing they can never have the happy ending they fight for, knowing that every single character you meet cannot escape this unscathed? I will never be the same as I was before.

Hugo, emperor of Mor Ardain? He is a kind, gentle man who wants nothing more than to protect the people he cares about and to fight by his best friend's side. Brighid and Aegeaon are endlessly loyal to him, beyond the level that Blades already are loyal to their Drivers. At the end of it all, he does achieve his goals. He protects Mor Ardain and Addam to his final breath, sacrificing his all to ensure their survival. Brighid and Aegeaon, in turn, were so closely bonded to Hugo yet forced to forget everything they shared with him. Brighid could only rely on what she had written of their time together before Hugo's death, and I can't recall if Aegeaon even had that.

Addam managed to stop Malos for a time, but he still failed. He couldn't prevent the fall of Torna, he couldn't save his best friend and his retainer, he couldn't master Mythra's power because he was afraid of it, and he couldn't ensure the threat of Malos or Amalthus was gone. Minoth managed to find people he could forge bonds with after leaving Amalthus, but he could never truly escape Amalthus's influence. He could never escape the ghosts of his past, being forced to encounter the influence of both Malos and Amalthus even 500 years later despite being supposedly freed by his Flesh Eater status. Mythra ultimately failed to stop Malos and, despite forging powerful connections with the Torna party and Milton, could never truly feel as if she was accepted due to both her power as the Aegis and her personality. After Torna concluded, she made Pyra to "fix" everything she perceived to be wrong about herself, and never felt fully accepted until her journey with Rex 500 years later.

And Lora, Jin, and Haze are quite possibly the most tragic of all. Not only was all of their fighting for naught, not only was Malos still a threat to what they cared about, but none of them were given a chance to enjoy the little peace they had fought to make. Lora was killed by Amalthus's forces within months, her life cut short so early at the whims of a depraved Praetor. She never got to see the Tornan survivors find homes in Tantal or Leftheria, and she left behind so much in Jin, Haze, and Mikhail. Jin lived on after in his own sort of sorrow. He had to consume Lora's heart to keep his memories of her, but grew so disillusioned with humanity that he sought its destruction in just the same manner as Amalthus and Malos. He brought his surrogate son, Mikhail, into the same sorrow, and both lived in this desolate state for centuries before at last being reunited with Lora in death. Haze met the fate of most Blades, losing her memories after Lora's death, but was then violated by the theft of her core crystal and her reawakening at the hands of Amalthus, Lora's very killer. She also existed in a state of lost identity and was used as a puppet and tool for propaganda for centuries before her "merciful" final death at the hands of Jin, her former companion and friend.

Even Malos never received a decent end. He was injured severely, lost a substantial portion of his power, and still couldn't escape the permeating influence of Amalthus as his Driver. He remained a puppet in his own right, never discerning what he truly desired or whether his goal of destroying humanity was his own or yet another inheritance from his Driver. He and Jin could rarely find solace in anyone but each other, as even if they had been foes before, nobody else could truly understand what each had undergone.

The only character who truly received a "good" ending from Torna was Amalthus, who was wholly undeserving of it and made everyone else's lives so much so much more terrible in the process. Despite everything, his desire for the end of humanity and his installation as a god went completely unchallenged. Directly or indirectly, he singlehandedly caused half of the problems in the world of Xenoblade 2 in pursuit of these goals.

In conclusion,

A. Fuck Amalthus. All my homies hate Amalthus.

B. I am feral for these hopelessly tragic characters. As much as it tears my heart apart to see them struggle in futility, I enjoy them and their narratively-induced dooms so very deeply.

#like. none of them got out of this ok. not a single one. #other than amalthus but fuck him. #i love and hate seeing them torn apart by the Plot Maelstrom. #jin xenoblade #lora xenoblade #haze xenoblade #mythra xenoblade #minoth xenoblade #addam xenoblade #brighid xenoblade #aegeaon xenoblade #hugo xenoblade #malos xenoblade #amalthus xenoblade #torna the golden country #xenoblade chronicles 2

[i-like-sticks]

Gonna dump this here cause I can since I am reminded of the names I picked out for my OCs in Destiny (especially for the Witness's people)! Did anyone ask for this? No! But, hey, its here for notes and reference if anyone is curious to ask!

As I mentioned on an ask on my main, I take a lot of names that are mostly in line with my own culture while trying to fit them with the character's personality or a trait they have.

-Karaya's name literally translates to "moon" and if people know me very well for a long time, anyone that is named after the moon tend to be tragical figures of a sort. And sadly, Karaya is no different. Though, despite his suffering and challenges, he does overcome them and is dedicated to the changes he makes by showing he will persevere and not be taken down. Why I pick to associate him with the moon mostly goes in hand that its the same as it often does with many of my stories. Tragical as it may be to be associated with the moon, each one is strong and pushes through to become something mighty and grand in the end. Plus, the moon in my culture is known to be just as jovial and persevering despite the sadness She endures.

-Tureygua translates to "celestial skies" but also goes by the nickname Turey which ironically translates to "sky". Again, this is more of a play that Turey has a connection with the stars and therefore, an association with Karaya (as he is a distant ancestor of his). Though Turey isn't an astronomer, he does look up to the stars for knowledge and strength, guidance as a means to comfort him in dire times. In a way, Turey is like the person that goes "the sky is not the limit but the start" sort of person, pushing through every challenge in front of him because he knows he can do it.

-Homayoun is one of the few characters that doesn't share a name within my culture. Instead, it borrows from the Persian culture in terms of meaning fortunate/rich/noble. However, his name is sort of an irony as his beginnings were never noble or fortunate. He's an individual plagued by constant misfortunes that have in the long run made him rather bleak and hold a depressed outlook in life. Its only after his marriage to Tureygua and certain things that have happened that eventually allow him to make a change of his outlook on life and gain that fortune he had never had. Its with his family he is noble and rich, fortunate and blessed to have what he has before his passing.

-Mirari (Turey and Homayoun's child), is also another character whose name is not based on anything in my culture. Instead, it borrows from the Portuguese word "miracle" as that is literally what they are for the pair. Being born premature and right at the cusp of death for both them and their "mother", it was a miracle that they made it through and managed to live a long and healthy life. They are the pair's little miracle and will cherish them as such considering how much they love them and how much joy they bring them as a family.

-Hutia translates to "rabbit". Its not because they look like a rabbit that I picked this name for Hutia, but more so, because he is skittish like one; easily overwhelmed and frightened in the way a nervous rabbit would be at times. Its more a jab at my own anxious personality as I am always compared to a rabbit at home by my own family. Plus, rabbits are cute and also hold a lot of meaning for me in stories as well! Being anxious at the start but able to overcome their fears by proving such things won't rule their lives entirely. Something to which I have planned out for Hutia in the Alternate Timeline AU.

-Zinato (Hutia's first spouse before their divorce) translates to "irritated", which is pretty much their biggest personality trait when they are seen as their true selves. Anything that doesn't go their way instantly annoys them to a point of being completely selfish and intolerable. And often times, its usually with Hutia they share this sentiment with because they are total opposites in personality. Zinato is more outgoing and adventurous, impulsive and brash. Hutia is not. Therefore, Zinato becomes extremely irate anytime Hutia wants nothing to do with their plans or just seemingly wants to be left alone.

-Guani' (Hutia's second husband) translates to "noble man", to which I like to reflect on his more caring and gentle approach to things. He may not be of noble origins as he comes from a poorer background, but he certainly has the heart of a good person and carries it boldly. Its this sort of approach that helps Hutia come out of their shell and be more accepting of themselves as well as others who genuinely care for him. Plus, it also hints where he will take his family line down in the Alternate Timeline AU!

-Mabuya literally translates to "ghost" or in some cases "evil spirit" though it is debatable to be honest. However, I am taking the context of that of a simple ghost. Sort of a joke that they are aptly named after the little companions guardians gain when chosen by the Traveler and because they are so quiet and often hidden in plain sight to other characters. Its their eerily quiet nature that sort of puts people off to think them as a ghost, but they are actually pretty chill and just quiet and reserved. They do like talking to Scooter though! Even if its just in tiny whispers. Mabuya is a direct descendant of Hutia and his husband Guani' as well as Karaya in the Alternate Timeline AU.

-Bijirita translates to "cooing dove", though he is far from the idea of a tranquil little dove that innocently sits on a tree. If anything, he is quite the opposite. Sadistic at heart and sly like a fox, always waiting to strike his prey like a viper eying its prey in silence. Why I named him after something so peaceful is to play on the idea of surprise and that is what Bijirita holds as a character. He is literally full of surprises when given the chance to show them. But like a dove, his eerily calm demeanor helps him use his charm to trick people into getting what he wants. Its perhaps one of the biggest surprises his husband Shaan came across when they first met. Bijirita is a descendant of Mirari and Karaya in the Alternate Timeline AU.

-Baracutey translates to "solitary" in terms of a person and animal alike. This wasn't always quite the case for him in his early life but he was and still is a person that prefers to handle things on his own then admit he needs help in the long run. Pride runs deep in his bloodline and sadly, he holds that fault in his own. And this holds especially true after particular events in his life, in which he becomes more reserved and solitary in general. Does it mean he is completely devoid of emotion and love and is a constant edge lord? No. But he just has a hard time expressing things out of trust. Baracutey is the son of Caguana and a descendant of Karaya.

-Rahe translates to "daughter", though gender in general of the Witness's people literally mean nothing to them. This one is sort of simple as they are the child of the General Baracutey, but do not know this until much later on in the story. Neither of them are aware of each other's presence aside from the brief meeting they have early on in their life. Brief as it was, they hold no memory of their father whatsoever. They identify as nonbinary with they/them pronouns mostly but sometimes will go by she/her. They are Baracutey's child and the grandchild of Bajari Caguana.

-Caguana translates to "fertility mother". She is aptly named after the goddess of fertility in my culture as she is sort of the "mother" figure to her people being the Bajari (another word that translates to one's utmost respect in title). And being Bajari means being both a leader and mother/father figure of one's people, which is the role she takes on as such. This also goes in hand that her children rule alongside her as many previous Bajari have done, echoing back to days when Karaya became the first. Yet, despite her motherly figure for the people, she is a very doting mother to her children and grandchildren as well, once again echoing the love and care Karaya had for his own children and grandchildren when they came about. She leads on with examples of utmost care and caution, wanting only the best possible outcome to ensure things go well, thus ensuring a better means of prospering for her people in the long run. She too is a descendant of Karaya, the mother of Baracutey, and grandmother of Mabuya, Rahe, and Bijirita in the Alternate Timeline AU.

-Shaan is another character that is not named from my own culture but borrows from the Hindi word of "pride". And if anyone knows Shaan well, he is definitely a Lubraean full of such pride and more and is not afraid to show it either. He is loud and bombastic, egotistical when insulted and will be damn sure to let anyone know no one insults him and gets away with it. His pride is not out of stroking his ego though as he does hone the skills to brag about his awards and accomplishments. He does, essentially, have the very right to brag and be open about it to anyone who challenges him and he will be sure that when anyone who does so will feel his wrath following such pride. Does that mean he is always right? No. He can and will be wrong many times, Bijirita has shown him that. But he won't let anyone know that nor live to have that under their belt. This Lubraean is one you don't want to mess with, especially when complimenting Bijirita's sadism and cunning with his own to be rid of his enemies.

-Scooter literally has no name of translation. He earned this nickname purely because I call one of my cats "scooter" at times. Its a playful name that does, however, reflect his playful and outgoing nature and he no qualms in earning such a name either. This nickname was also given to him in "canon" because he often liked to play on wheeled items and scoot on them for fun. If he had a scooter or skateboard, he may be able to do all the tricks on them.

-Tzaatehk also has no real meaning to his name. Its actually a play on a villain's name from a show I used to watch as a kid (who ironically was an evil vizir that plotted to kill the prince of his homeworld). However, in terms of personality, Tzaatehk is far from the simple "evil" of a jealous vizir. If anything, he is just evil inside and out, rotten to a core that would infect anyone who dare take after him. He's not a good person and should be avoided at all costs. Even others of his kind do not enjoy his presence nor wish to be around him. Many plots have been made to be rid of him but somehow, he always seems to prevail and capture his would-be assassins, killing them in turn as punishment to challenge of his own standing.

And lastly, I am adding in the Witness as a probable player but only in terms of historical context for their people. However, here they are mortal but the child of the current Bajari at the time of history (thus meeting when their people and the Lubraean's meet for the first time and clear Lubrae of its hold of the Regime).

I had initially given them the name Cauta as it translates to "center of the universe", a play of description of them being well, literally what they are to their parent and the role they play for their people later on in the Alternate Timeline AU. However, I also debate on giving them the name Guaroco, which translates to "remembrance/to know" as an homage to their true canon selves.

I do have several nicknames picked out for them that will be given to them by Rhulk, but for now, its a fight between these two names in general.

But as of now, these are all the named characters I have thus far for my own stories. I might and will have more to add later! But for now, this is the current set list (minus all the smaller characters attached to the these).

#the chatter box #just info dumping stuff for my ocs and stories #destiny #destiny 2 #destiny oc #oc stuff

[kreideprinz69]

Something that really grates on me about a lot of anti-Koma people is the complete lack of empathy for Nagito in regards to his actions from the Dead Room to the Chapter 5 Trial. Treating it as if it's the single most reprehensible thing any culprit has done over the course of the entire series. When it is pretty much the exact same shit that Asahina was pulling in the first game's fourth trial. But with a far less petty motive. We see how the remaining five survivors react when they discover the truth of the NWP in Chapter 6. They are all on the verge of a breakdown as it all starts to become too much for them, and they only narrowly pull themselves back together to initiate the shutdown. Now imagine how they would react if: 1. All those survivors were isolated from each other when they learned the truth. 2. They were not made aware of the fact that their apparent turn to evil wasn't actually voluntary, and that they too are victims. 3. They did not have the three DR1 survivors and AI Chiaki to offer moral support during these revelations. 4. They were not made aware that any person who dies in the simulation will actually be possessed by Junko's AI in the real world. Because those were the circumstances of Nagito learning the "truth" in Chapter 4! His antis get so worked up over his bitchiness towards Hajime and the others, that they refuse to see just how tragic and pitiable the situation really is. What at first seems like a bizarre and vicious betrayal is actually a young man finally having his spirit broken after a life of endless traumas. Becoming so ashamed and disgusted with himself that the only thing he can think of as a small act of penance is to torture himself to death and get his classmates executed for their crimes. While not realizing that he's inadvertently aiding the same Ultimate Despair he's trying to stop. And it pisses me off when it bleeds over into fanfics too, with most of the cast ostracizing him for it. Because come the fuck on. Characters like Teruteru, Fuyuhiko, and Peko really don't much have a leg to stand on with that, considering their actions would have had essentially the same result if the class trials went their way. Me personally I like to think they'd keep a careful watch on him. But also make clear to him that while they don't condone his actions and think he made a terrible mistake, they're not going to condemn him either. Acknowledging that if they'd been in his position, they don't know what they might have been capable of. Considering how his character grew, I like to think Fuyuhiko would be one of the first people to admit that he'd probably have reacted just the way Monokuma wanted him to if he'd been given that special "prize".

YESS this! this right here omg, i love talking about this.

i think it's really easy for people to treat nagito with a total lack of empathy because of just how far removed nagito is from his own humanity. so a lot of people just put the insane label on him and don't take much of a further look at his actions. but the reality is that every action he's taking holds so much meaning and has never not had a well thought out reason. doesn't make them justifiable, but does offer so much more depth into his character than just being "crazy."

also i agree on the aoi part, i really don't get how people hate nagito for chapter 5 but don't say anything about aoi trying to get her classmates killed in the trial. dont get me wrong, thats not me ragging on her, because i adore aoi. its just the inconsistencies in how people treat characters for their actions that bother me. i think people forget just how much of a stressful situation the cast is in. suddenly waking up where you're not supposed to be, missing memories, knowing your friend or you might die at any moment, not to mention the investigations and trials; thats all pretty fucked up.

and like you said, nagito was ENTIRELY on his own when he learned the truth about everything happening. he was already in a lot of mental distress when the killings started, so the whole "truth" would have just completely broken him. he's been so violently traumatized his entire life, literally everything has been taken for him and supposedly he's going to die from his illness soon since there's nothing left for his luck to take. the only thing he's been able to do is cope through his obsession with hope, (and if we remove the obsession with hope and just focus on the fact that they're inside a simulation and caused the world to end, that's already stressful enough. the main cast BARELY coped even with all the help) so when you take that into account AND that he was actively working against the one thing that could never leave him (hope)- that's pretty fucking destroying! the only way for him to not lose the last thing he had, was to commit suicide in the way he did. which he full heartedly believed was for the greater good.

the sheer mental distress you would have to be under to be totally okay with torturing yourself before committing suicide is, KIND OF A LOT lol. also, props to him for coming up with such an elaborate plan despite the stress he was under. i honestly feel like his death was heavily foreshadowed. the entire game he talks about wanting to be a stepping stone for hope and that he's okay with being killed for it. his entire life has all just been one big tragedy too. the way he died, his motives behind it, and goal to become the ultimate hope; it was honestly a great ending for him. but im not gonna go into depth on that because im already probably getting off topic here whoops

but lets talk about his bitch arc for a second (chapter 4.) people blow it SO out of proportion. nagito was an asshole for one afternoon and was bullying hajime because he's angry he's in love with some loser. its just funny to me how some people make it a huge deal and use it to say nagito hates hajime. in chapter 5 before he dies, he literally shows remorse for his actions and barely anyone talks about it!. i can talk about that a bit more on a different post if someone is curious but im trying not to let this get ungodly long lmao

also yes, the way characters in fanon will be overly critical with nagito. while i do believe they were a littleee bit harsh with him in the game (another thing i could rant about but i'll spare you) i really don't think they would hate him after the simulation. on the final trial with junko, they almost let her win. and when they learn about being remnants and they all wake up, i think they would have come to understand nagito at least a LITTLE bit better. literally none of them are inoccent, so they probably came to realize they weren't all that much better than nagito. while we don't really see nagito interact with the other characters much in the danganronpa 3 hope arc; he looks to be on good terms with the rest of the cast. and just judging by how they all agreed to just live for the future and put the past behind them, i do think they would try their best to give nagito a chance, even if they're a bit weirded out by him. also i totally agree with the fuyuhiko bit! i think he's a very reasonable person that understand morally grey areas, so i like to think he was one of the first to start giving nagito a chance.

okay sorry that this was SO long oh my god. i cannot make myself stop talking sometimes, especially if it's nagito related sdhjfbsdfkhjb. but thanks for the ask because i find discussing this stuff super interesting!!! <3

#nagito komaeda #danganronpa 2 #sdr2 #sorry if this is incomprehensible i am barely awake

[lemonhemlock]

Sooooo tired of the Team Black allegations. For the 1256th time, they either do NOT like Helaemond and dislike it as well OR don't care about it at all. Sure, there are some self declared Helaemonds out there who say they are Team Black but they're like…five people??? Why is it so difficult to admit Helaemonds are 99% Greens? Otherwise yes, there are trolls who will love the drama of the kids being bastards or simply the idea of the Green side having its own incestuos affair because it will paint the fans who hate incest as hypocrites (and many are for sure since they ship Helaegon, sorry, but it is the truth) as they will have to defend Aemond from it but do we have to care about them and their opinions? They're going to find stupid and baseless reasons to hate the Greens regardless of Helaemond becoming canon. F**k them. Also, this whole Team Black thing is very transparent and reminds me of the times when Al*smonds and antis were accusing Helaemond shippers of being secretly Team Black because they want to justify Blood & Cheese and paint the Greens as hypocrites. Yes, this happened.

Thank you for pointing out Aemond's duty to his Baratheon betrothed. You're actually one of the very few Green bloggers who do so. For some reasons most forget, or pretend to, about this which is…very telling! I also hate the theory that Aemond will stop caring about duty after Storm's End and B&C. Although not impossible like you've mentioned, for Aemond to act as if he can go and do anything is very child like behavior and feels like it would be really bad characterization and, at least in my opinion, will make him really, really unlikable as a person. No matter how awful he will be feeling about himself, his remaining family still depends on him honoring his promise to the Baratheons. It's literally a matter of life and death, he can't just say "Fuck duty, fuck everyone, I will be marrying Alys because I can and want to" and expect no consequences, especially militarily. Why should the Baratheons accept such an insult? Having bastards is one thing, he would very easily get away with it being a man, but marrying a bastard servant twice his age? Do these people think he can marry Alys and, if he wins his battle against Daemon, return with her as his wife to King's Landing afterwards? Do they think the remaining lords should simply accept it?

I'm not kidding, if they go with this interpretation, with Aemond not giving a fuck anymore, I will only 100% ship him with Dark Sister. I'm not sure I can bear how insufferable antis will become if Aemond will be leaving his remaining family's fates to the Blacks for a woman, because this is what the whole affair would essentially be even if they will claim it to be a tragic love story and go after anyone else who disagree as they're doing right now. And I hate even more how the same people who use the duty BS argument against Helaemond claim that he married Alys BECAUSE he is DUTIFUL and didn't want their kid to be a bastard. It's just baffling. The hypocrisy is amazing. Yeah, I get it, we should like it because love >>> duty and Aemond still became a kinslayer despite following his duty so why he should care about it anymore? but regardless, these people we are talking about are royals whose actions have deep repercussions across the entire realm. They can't do whatever they want even if it's in the name of love.

Also the idea that we should protect Helaegon from the infidelity allegations when show!Aegon is out there cheating (and raping women) on Helaena is just sick, and dare I say misogynistic. It's simply insane to expect her to stay faithful to him no matter what, especially if there is someone out there who genuinely loves her and vice-versa. Why is it that every time a situation like this comes up (the man cheating with other women) it is ALWAYS on the wife to remain faithful?

I have to say that this post had me in stitches, so thank you for that. I basically agree with everything you've said, love the passion & also, you're going to love this, because I was on Four Storms alert ever since my first Aemond/Alys post. [For any new visitors, there's more in my tag + this particular post that delves some of the points anon is talking about, with contributions from many other friendly voices. Also, ofc, my Maris/Aemond cinematic universe. Alrite, enough shameless self-promotion].

Yeah, the idea that we should protect the sanctity of the helaegon marriage never really sat right with me when Aegon is out there cheating left and right and Aemond is making the beast with two backs with a random woman he's known for 5 minutes. Meanwhile Helaena is subjected to indescribable trauma and gets a horrific ending, but she's not even allowed some measure of reprieve after the showrunners made sure to depict even her book!decent!marriage as sketchy. Personally, this concept of unconsummated courtly love rings rather too flavourless to my ears, as well - what can I say. To each their own, but it's kind of unfair to Helaena.

A further observation I would like to make is that I, too, often find this discourse on Aemond's sense of duty lacking, because many fans seem to treat duty like a switch. "Aemond is dutiful up to X point in this linear timeline I've decided upon (and any alternative interpretation is blasphemy and should be vigorously suppressed), after which his sense of duty completely dissipates because I need to make his relationship with Alys ~romantic~ and he basically doesn't give a shit about his family or political responsibilities anymore." I actually think helaemonds have the right of this, because they're always more likely to paint Aemond as a conflicted figure, consumed by a very byronic inner turmoil, who's always teetering on the edge of doing what's right by his family vs experiencing the freedom of giving into his own desires for once. It is within that precarious balancing act that you can build the most compelling dark princely figure that makes the girlies' hearts a-flutter! Whereas the first interpretation feels very robotic and soulless to me, yes, perhaps even shippable with Dark Sister.

To close off, nothing would ever justify Blood & Cheese, even IF Helaena's kids would be Aemond's. The retributive "payment" for Luke's life would be Aemond's life aka his actual killer END OF. "A son for a son" does not make sense and is not justified - that was always the point of it. Needless brutality, the horrific inhumanity of it. Killing off innocents who had absolutely nothing to do with the act is not how people enacted retributive justice. I'm pretty sure Hammurabi would agree with me on this.

#ask #anon #helaemond #blood & cheese #riverdragon #anti alysmond

[woodchipp]

hoo boy

"it's fiction, it's supposed to/has the right to be extreme!"

Omocat herself said the plotline of "Sunny kills Mari" that's featured in the final product was chosen primarily because it was considered "a believable circumstance" lmao. because a 12 yo kid improvising a cover-up for his bestie's manslaughter sure does sound believable. happened to my buddy Eric once

Secondly, the entire theme of the game is guilt and forgiving yourself and making Mari's death intentional will minimize the message.

If you want a story that handles themes of guilt and forgiveness with actual nuance and tact, you already have Silent Hill 2. Or even Bojack Horseman, for that matter. OMORI having a different message won't be a significant loss because it can't even handle those themes right.

Just make Sunny's arc about trying to deal with that "I made her feel unloved before she died, I should've noticed she was unwell, I should have died instead" type of guilt and understanding there's no point in beating himself up over Mari killing herself because it wasn't his fault. Characters tend to elicit more sympathy when they're fucked over by circumstances they couldn't control (as an example, this is why what happens with Lucas' family in Mother 3 is so tragic in the first place), and since OMORI really wants you to see Sunny as the Poow Widdle Bapy who was dealt a bad hand (even though he was responsible for killing Mari and thus created most of his problems himself), the only feasible way to rewrite the game without deviating from the game's original framework too much would be to actually screw Sunny over by circumstances he couldn't control.

the Mewo room in black space orchestrates and demonstrates the feeling of hopelessness

If you don't remember about the "Stab" option, that is. Speaking of that

It orchestrates and demonstrates the feeling of hopelessness, and that ending your life (choosing the stab option) is a much better option than facing whatever horrible reality (cutting Mewo). However, if you do in fact cut open Mewo, you are shamed.

Okay, wait. I need to unpack this.

The post asserts that cutting Mewo open represents "facing horrible reality" right before mentioning that you're shamed for cutting Mewo open. So the game actually insinuates that ending your life would be the better option in this case. bruh

If this game had better writing, I'd be able to write that off as Sunny's thought process being warped by his suicidal ideation. But since the narrative (how the story is presented to the player) never contradicts Sunny's unreliable narration (and even reinforces it at some points), I can't.

It's also important to note that the interpretation of the Mewo room presented in this post is just that. An interpretation. The game itself doesn't give you any solid clues to figure out why it suddenly wants you to kill a cat.

So, how does the "truth" help amplify the guilt? Simply by making the player blame Sunny

Name one OMORI fan who played the game and blamed Sunny. I'd give them head

If the game's intention really was to make the player blame him, one look at the fandom will tell you that it failed. Horribly.

Coming back to the intentional death option, I think it would be a more realistic approach, but it lacks the psychological turn (not events, but emotions!)

"Psychological turn" is quite a fancy way to say that the game pulls a plot twist out of its ass just for the sake of subverting the audience's expectations without regard to how it might impact the story.

Ah, but of course

(not events, but emotions!)

Whether a plot point logically makes sense for the story you're telling doesn't matter. It's all about the Emotions said plot point makes you experience.

Feels before Reals.

It's straightforward, and the player would sympathize with Sunny. They know, for a fact, that it wouldn't be his fault if Mari took her own life.

Sometimes, "straightforward" doesn't mean "bad."

"the player would sympathize with Sunny" OMORI's entire plot is based on pushing you to sympathize with him lmao

But with the other scenario, we get a deeper understanding of Sunny's guilt/fears from his perspective.

And we wouldn't be able to get a deeper understanding of Sunny if his sister killed herself because...?

No, seriously, what is this point even supposed to insinuate? Do you really think that the pain of losing a loved one to suicide is somehow less complex and easier to deal with?

I like that this post never mentions that having Mari commit suicide would've allowed the story to take a deeper look into Mari herself by elaborating on the reasons why she felt compelled to take her life.

But of course Mari's never relevant in such discussions. She's just the girl in the fridge, after all.

#i ventured into the 'omori analysis' tag out of pure morbid curiosity and it's needless to say that I shouldn't have #because WOW. the takes I saw in there are. well. they sure do exist. #omori #omori game #omori sunny #omori mari #omori fandom

[actuallylorelaigilmore]

2023 Movie Journey #3: Elvis

elvis. i watched this with @actuallylukedanes​, which is the only reason it landed so early in my viewing this year. it was on my list but not a high priority at all: obviously i love tom hanks but i knew he wasn’t playing his lovable usual here, and i really have no feelings towards elvis either way. i barely grew up aware of who he was, my exposure to him was entirely secondhand through an episode of designing women and a john waters movie that i imprinted on like a baby duck when i was way too young to be watching a john waters movie (and which i can never enjoy again cuz now Some Things ruin my childhood retroactively).

so honestly, the only reason this movie went on my list is because i read a long profile about it that was really about baz luhrmann, and because moulin rouge was like a gift he gave just to me that lasts forever, i’ll give anything he makes a chance. once i was reconsidering my disinterest in the subject matter, the plan to watch it with leander sealed the deal. 

putting it behind a cut even though i have less to say about it than some other movies, because it really...wasn’t good, exactly. i wouldn’t say it was bad, either, but it was structured really similarly to every other biopic, which surprised me. the visuals were baz luhrmann all the way, but other than deciding to make this a story of ‘elvis through the lens of the complicated figure whose presence both made him and doomed him’ (as opposed to just centering the story on freaking elvis, whose name is on the poster!) his life and career story is told almost identically to how they framed the whitney houston biopic i saw. start near the end, then take us back to the origin story, and eventually make it back to where you started after showing how we got there. then conclude with a tragic death (offscreen).

so i mean, the performances were good. i can give the movie full credit for that. austin butler did a good job and is very talented. tom hanks (who i already knew is talented, obviously) really fills up his character so that even though he’s a truly cruel and masterful huckster, there’s still a chance that he might believe his own lies in the end. i didn’t recognize elvis’s father as being played by the duke from moulin rouge but leander did right away, so they get all the points. :) and billy from stranger things was there! wearing eyeliner! he is very pretty in eyeliner and i highly preferred his styling in this to stranger things.

but underneath all the glitz and the big performances, i guess to me the movie just felt so shallow. watching it didn’t make me feel more interested in elvis, though it did make me like austin butler more...and i have to wonder if some of that is because for all its big visuals, this movie didn’t go as big on emotions. 

it is so invested in the character tom hanks plays, but he’s a canny operator with few sincere feelings we can connect to. a lot of elvis’s emotions are all about his love of performing, so we get establishments of his marriage and family but quickly speed past those things to his affairs and eventual divorce. when he loses his mother and when his marriage ends, he’s given about a minute onscreen to mourn each before it’s quite literally back on with the show, prodded forward by gambling-addicted tom hanks.

and so instead of being a movie that explores elvis, exactly, this is a movie where we watch elvis be so often a passive actor in his own life. a young man naively trusting a greedy influence, a lonely man accepting affection from strangers despite its effect on his family, an addicted man taking whatever drugs he’s given to keep moving. it was hard to feel connected to the main character when he was being constantly taken advantage of or only seemed happy onstage and was, in this telling, a star who kept doing whatever he was told no matter how much it hurt. (his very brief rebellious phase before they sent him to basic training was my favorite part of the film. that had some power.)

i can’t help comparing this movie to the whitney houston one because there was such life and joy in that, which gave its sad ending all the more impact. i knew to expect a similar depressing ending for elvis, and yet, this movie held his death at a distance, repeating the framing of tom hanks narrating about elvis in the end. i was glad that the whitney biopic didn’t show her death, and didn’t need to see his--but we could have seen his family and friends reacting, or some moment of him in private, rather than the last shot we got which was literally physically distanced, too. 

using colonel parker they way they did gave tom hanks a lot to do, but it felt like a concept the filmmakers were too excited about as a ‘twist’ to realize that it sapped what makes a biopic great: the force of the star at its center. if they elevated tom hank’s role because they were worried about fully giving austin butler the stage, i don’t think they needed to be. he was a good choice, and i just wish they had trusted him to do more. then maybe i could’ve seen the movie i expected this to be, in which baz luhrmann told me the story of elvis--rather than one where tom hanks did so while defending his villainous actions as he got the last word.

(though technically elvis got the last word in a delightfully predictable post-credits moment and i do give them--ahem--credit for that. and leander more points, for playing that part on purpose.)

in conclusion, not my favorite viewing experience for a lot of different reasons, but i’m still glad i saw it. because austin butler was fun, and, well, baz luhrmann. the man makes the shiniest glittery movies, and i love them so much for existing even when i don’t love them at all.

#elvis #baz luhrmann #austin bustler #2023 movie journey #tom hanks #actuallylukedanes #i have the best best friend

[starlene]

Some Titanic thoughts after seeing the 25th Anniversary Rerelease!

Thought number 1: about being a Titanic fan

Back when I first fell in love with Titanic, the backlash was pretty much at its height.

I became interested in the history of the real ship immediately after finishing the movie. I also immediately found out that if you wanted to be taken seriously in online communities centered around the historical Titanic, you couldn’t admit that you liked the movie, and to be taken seriously as a person in general, you also couldn’t admit that you liked it. It was just the absolute epitome of cringe back then. People don’t fall in love like that in two days, it’s so stupid~

And I just want to say that remembering all that nonsense makes me so glad that we’ve moved past that!!

I love that even serious history nerds can say they like the movie these days – and why shouldn’t we. James Cameron is clearly one of the most committed Titanic nerds of all time; he’s gone on record saying that the movie was an elaborate excuse for him to dive to the wreck. We could’ve had a big successful movie set on the Titanic directed by someone who only wanted a dramatic historical backdrop for their story and didn’t care about the details – but instead, we got a movie made by a Titanic nerd, with lots and lots of goodies for other Titanic nerds. And I’m also grateful that these days, you can mention Titanic being your favourite movie without people literally rolling their eyes at you.

Now, if only we could shut down the eternal “would they have both fit on that door” debate, then I would be perfectly content...

Thought number 2: about the romance

Personally, I’m as asexual as they come, and usually, I’m not especially excited about fictional love stories – with a handful of rather dark and/or tragic exceptions, because sometimes, you just gotta stare into the darkness and think about desire and death and heartbreak for a while. Yet I adore this movie, and always have. Of course, it fits the tragic bill... but at least at this point in my life, I don’t enjoy the romance because of the tragedy. Instead, to me, it’s all about the light; all about Rose’s character arc.

Presumably, Jack is the first person who ever sees Rose for who she is, instead of what they want her to be – and that, having a person she can safely be herself with, even if it’s only for two and a half days, gives Rose the courage and determination to live the rest of her life on her own terms. But for Rose to grow into the woman she’s destined to become, she also has to lose Jack. It’s only via being forced to stand on her own two feet, without anyone around to push her or to hold her hand, that she unlocks her full potential. Seeing those photos of her life at the end feels so rewarding somehow – she survived, and then she learned to thrive. I love that for her.

In a nutshell: to me, the appeal of this love story is that it’s also a story about a woman realising her full potential. Also, the feeling of being with someone you can be 100% yourself with is a powerful, lovely thing, no matter whether you experience it in a romantic or a platonic or familial or whatever context, so that speaks to me too.

Thought number 3: what makes me cry

I guess it’s because I was touched by the way they portrayed him in the musical, but I found myself paying close attention to First Officer Murdoch today, and I feel like my perspective of the movie’s portrayal of him changed a little. I’ve always interpreted it as pretty negative (and I know there were complaints about his characterisation when the movie was first released), but this time... dunno, the character just felt more human and sympathetic to me than he ever has before. I managed not to cry for the entire sinking, but then, spotting Murdoch in the finale right next to Thomas Andrews hit me with an unexpected force, and there I was again.

Good thing I wasn’t alone with my feelings, though: I don’t think I’ve ever seen a queue to a ladies’ room look so distraught than after this showing. I guess when you’re a fan of this movie (and I bet everyone who found their way to a 12:30 showing on a Friday was), it just always finds its way into your heart, no matter how many times you’ve seen it.

I feel like in general, the older I get, the more works of fiction make me cry. What’s up with that?

#I have a somewhat weird relationship with this movie #I love it to bits and it's my forever number one favourite... but I also watched it only once between the 2012 and 2023 rereleases #I guess a little of it on the big screen (with a side of some nice gifsets sprinkled on the Tumblr dash) really goes a long way #I don't need to watch it often to always hold it close to my heart #personal. #Titanic

[hardestgrove]

THE MUNGROVE FILES: ELRIC/LOTR

Fantasy as a Means of Examining the Dynamic Between Billy and Eddie Or Why I Think You Should All Read Elric and Associate It With Billy

This is another unhinged essay from me and I will be doing a lot here, arguably the most, certainly too much. But fuck it it’s 2008 and I’m writing a shipping manifesto bc tbh I think LJ had it right and long ass metas are fun. In this essay I will be talking about why I think Billy would be a fan of the Elric Saga, how this works thematically with Eddie and why I think that the difference in which series mirror their character cores enhances the dynamic.

For starters, Elric of Melniboné — what even is that?

The Elric Saga is a series of about 7 books written by the English author Michael Moorcock from the 60s to 00s, the majority being written in the 60s-80s. They were printed in magazines and then novellas and then compiled into larger books so it can get a little confusing when you looking for information about them. The Elric Saga is a seminal piece of dark pulp fantasy that has been just as much of a foundational piece of western fantasy media as The Lord of The Rings if not as well known by the masses. It’s been referenced by countless bands including Blue Öyster Cult, given Edward Elric of Full Metal Alchemist and White Wolf Publishing their names, been one of the foundations of Dungeons and Dragons entire creation and is the inspiration for the Targaryens and Valyria in George R. R. Martin’s series A Song of Ice and Fire — just to name a few places where Elric has had an effect.

(Also the Eldar from Warhammer 40k are LITERALLY the Melniboneans. Almost to a T.)

The story of the series follows Elric of Melniboné, a sickly albino sorcerer king of a decadent and corrupt empire still clinging to it’s glory from when it ruled most of their world. Elric at first determined to somehow do something about their slow decline, not just in power but in humanity, exiles himself and sets out to travel the Young Kingdoms of the humans to learn more than he could from books and study. Because of Elric's introspective self-loathing and hatred of Melnibonéan traditions, his subjects find him odd and unfathomable. However, his cousin Yyrkoon (next in the line of succession, as Elric has no heirs) interprets this behaviour as weakness and plots Elric's death. Complicating matters is Yyrkoon's sister Cymoril, who is deeply in love with Elric; Yyrkoon covets her, and part of his plan for usurpation is to marry Cymoril himself.

Elrics greatest aids in his quests for peace for his people, and then later only himself when he realizes there is no hope for Melniboné, are his patron and master Arioch, a Lord of Chaos and Duke of Hell and the evil eldritch blade with a mind of its own bestowed to him by Arioch, Stormbringer. The sword confers upon Elric strength, health, and fighting prowess, allowing him to do away with his dependence on drugs, but it must be fed by the souls of intelligent beings. In the end, the blade takes everyone close to Elric and eventually Elric's own soul as well. This is the most constant element of the Moorcock’s stories, that anyone who is too close to Elric for too long shares in his tragic fate by Stormbringer’s or Elric’s hand. The other is that Elric is trapped as a pawn in the cosmic war between Order and Chaos (this is where the DnD alignment chart comes from).

Elric himself is a handsome but weak and miserable man forever fighting against his own depression and despair as he feels his situation in life becomes more impossible to bear. He also has a lot of sex for someone who’s so miserable to be around which is pretty impressive. He’s a byronic anti-hero, at times really even more of an anti-villain and literally everything about him is sexy and tragic. He comes from a cycle of cruelty and is considered somewhat impure of breeding, that impurity is also likely why he still has even scraps of basic decency left compared to many of his country men who revel in atrocities. Even with him being the least terrible he’s still cruel, arrogant, prideful, spiteful and generally apathetic to life and most joys.

You see, Elric and his people are doomed. There is truly no hope for them. Thanks to an ancient deal made thousands of years ago the Melniboneans are tied to Arioch and as Arioch is a Lord of Chaos this means he is a monstrous corrupting force and the source of all the depravity bastardizing Elric’s people over the generations. Elric as their king is in many ways little more than a slave to Arioch’s wishes. While Elric as a facet of the Eternal Champion inevitably works for Balance and works with agents of Order at times, he is an agent of Chaos because the pact with Arioch which cannot be broken and Arioch is happy to bring him back to heel when he sees fit. There is no peace or happiness or safety for Elric, his god —and his sword— do not wish it so and Elric cannot fight back.

Elric became a very popular place to pull inspiration from for Hard Rock and Metal artists because of these darker themes. It’s noted that Elric’s relationship with Stormbringer is similar to an addiction. He relies on the sword to feel better/be healthier but it’s evil. It has it’s own agenda and frequently robs him of his own will or control over his own body, forcing him to cut down his own friends and loved ones. It fuels him by devouring the souls of others, damning them to a fate forever trapped inside the hell that is the sword. This dark parasitic/symbiotic relationship helped it hit home with musicians of the era.

Many people in the community consider Billy to be a secret bookworm or just more passionate about reading than you’d immediately think from seeing him. I throw in my hat for the Elric Saga being Billy’s favorite series. It’s fantasy, it’s metal, it’s got sex in it, it’s got a very handsome man absolutely going through it in conflicts he has largely no power over that get into questions of fate and self determination, all that shit. It reeks of Big Billy Energy™. You can even see parallels between his character in season 3 and Elric in what I just said about Elric and Stormbringer. Fun fact— The Eternal Champion always bears an aspect of the Black Sword as his or her weapon, though it may not always manifest as a sword (black veins anyone?).

I can see Billy finding Elric’s life and struggles much more engaging and emotionally resonant to his own than he ever could with say, The Lord of The Rings which as one of the biggest fantasy series of all time and present in this era I know many like to use when talking about what he reads. Elric is a miserable fuck, he hates himself and wants to die but he persists through everything. He curses the gods, picks himself back up, gets back into the pit and commits a few atrocities, fights a dude, saves a kingdom, accidentally kills his new best friend, saves the universe, weeps into his wine over his dead girlfriend, has sex with some lady, kills another dude—rinse, repeat. It’s honestly pretty impressive since he so clearly needs a therapist or 80.

The idea for many as to why Billy reads is for a certain amount of escapism from Neil and the abuse which I agree with. But I don’t think that LOTR has the kind of escapism Billy would resonate with because of its more optimistic and comforting tones. I don’t think that even in his escapism Billy likes to be “lied” to. He prefers stories where while it might not be the focus, the harsh realities are there. His escapism is in power fantasies, in stories set in rich and compelling worlds (which yes, LOTR also has), and in putting his pain into a character. I think many things that are baked into LOTR because of who Tolkien was don’t always sit well with Billy. Sometimes you win, but it’s a pyrrhic victory and you also kinda lose because the cycle of conflict continues. Sometimes the exiled king isn’t some stalwart dude who’s rule will fix everything with no good explanation as to why that would be, sometimes he sucks and there is no way out of the tailspin anyway. Sometimes you end up alone because of your own cruelty and selfless. Sometimes it takes the Apocalypse to finally get a chance to free yourself from your masters. Elric is as compelling as he is tragic and he’s only one facet of the Eternal Champion, a being that exists in different forms throughout the Multiverse. The Champion exists to uphold the Cosmic Balance, and could even be said to be an aspect or reflection of the Balance.

Most Champions don’t even know that they are a Champion and multiple can exist in the same place at the same time. I can see him fantasizing about being one. Billy is at his heart a protector, I can see him daydreaming about being a warrior for Balance, protecting the world from the war being Law and Chaos, and never even knowing he was. I think for Billy, who feels worthless and unwanted, the inherent fantasy of being just Built Different™ is more appealing than the “anyone can be a hero” vibes of LOTR.

With that let’s get into why The Lord of The Rings is Eddie’s favorite series and then the whole compare-y constrast-y “and that’s why they should kiss” part.

If Billy looked at Elric and said “yeah I’m about to make this dude my whole personality” then Eddie did that with Frodo. Frodo is essentially the town eccentric who was raised by his uncle, the other town eccentric. He’s intelligent and kind and no one’s idea of a hero at a glance. But he is heroic and he takes on an incredibly heavy burden because someone has to and he cares too deeply to let someone else be stuck with it, even if he wishes anyone else could have it. LOTR at it’s core is a story of hope, of unlikely friendship and heroism that stands up against time, distance and unspeakable evil. It’s a story of faith in your beliefs and your friends. It talks about surviving through harrowing events and the darkest times and how love and friendship can do so much to help you continue on against the odds.

It feels like a no brainer why all of that would appeal to Eddie. Unlike Billy, Eddie has a loving uncle and has managed to build a support system. His life is by no means perfect but he’s certainly doing better than Billy is. Eddie prefers the story where good inevitably triumphs over evil in a pretty clear cut way because that’s what he feels is right. It’s his escapism. Frodo’s struggle hits him emotionally and the plot itself is likely part of the foundation of his belief system. When asked to go with the party he says they’re asking him to walk into Mordor which yeah, fucking stupid, was stupid in LOTR too. But it was also the only option and the only right/good thing to do. Even if they didn’t succeed they would have at least tried. So of course Eddie goes too.

“Man was not born to a world of justice. But he can create such a world!”                 ― Michael Moorcock, Stormbringer

“War must be, while we defend our lives against a destroyer who would devour all; but I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend.”                  ― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Two Towers

Their choices in favorite media are basically symbols of their philosophies, beliefs and aesthetics. Elric is one man’s quest to find his place in the world and failing that, making a new world. Of overcoming endless adversity in a harsh uncaring universe. It’s got all the aesthetics you think of when talking about 60s-70s pulp fantasy— scantily clad ladies, handsome sword boys, crazy shit, totally unpronounceable words, weird architecture etc. LOTR is the story of a group of people working together to end a war and save their world. They have total faith in each other and their friendship, love and humility is in the end what helps them win. It’s aesthetics are more classic because well— it fucking codified the classical fantasy genre look. Also like fucking 8 million poems and songs everywhere constantly.

Billy does not take pride in his softness, he takes pride in his resilience, in his anger. Eddie takes pride his creativity and his care for others and his kindness. He talks about how he saw the boys alone in the cafeteria and went out of his way to take them under his wing and he runs a whole club built on collaborative creativity. Billy has worked alone his whole life to find ways to deny Neil’s shrinking of him. He plants his feet when he’s hit and refuses to be someone you forget. He refutes a universe that would walk by his existence, he will not be denied his space. He’s miserable and arrogant like Elric— Elric who only wants to be at peace. Eddie has found is little niche and he’s content in it, but when pressed he will stand up to defend it even if he’s scared. Because it’s the right thing to do, because he cares, because he couldn’t bear putting someone else in danger just so he’d be safe. He’s adventurous and loving like Frodo— Frodo who saved the shire for everyone, but not for himself.

Billy and Eddie are complimentary forces. Their differences create a conversation between them which can lead to growth and change and their similarities ensure it happens on even footing. They’re both poor, from dysfunctional families with bad dads, they both love metal, they’re both unlike the people around them. Billy can say the world is shit and Eddie can say “is it really?” and a dialogue can be opened that gets them both thinking. Billy ensures Eddie’s kindness isn’t abused, that the Shire remains unscoured. Eddie gives Billy the affection he craves and gives him the space he needs to feel peace. Because Billy is a protector and Eddie is a carer. Eddie shows on multiple occasions his emotional sensitivity and compassion. Like Elric traveling the Young Kingdoms, most people look at Billy and see a threat, a villain, because of what he is (a Melnibonean/an abuse victim with unhealthy mechanisms). Like Frodo, Eddie has the big heart and open mindedness to show pity and compassion even to Gollum who would’ve absolutely loved to bash his head in with a rock. And that kindness is what allows what’s left of Gollum’s humanity to shine through as Sméagol, the man he used to be.

I’m losing mental steam here because I’ve been at this Billy/Elric shit all day but I feel like this quote from Moonglum, another aspect of the Eternal Champion, kinda says what I’m getting at here.

“He had never understood his friendship with the albino. It had always been a peculiar mixture of reserve and affection, a fine balance which both men were careful to maintain, even in situations of this kind.

Elric, since his passion for Cymoril had resulted in her death and the destruction of the city he loved, had at all times feared bestowing any tender emotion on those he fell in with.

He had run away from Shaarilla of the Dancing Mist, who had loved him dearly. He had fled from Queen Yishana of Jharkor, who had offered him her kingdom to rule, in spite of her subjects’ hatred of him. He disdained most company save Moonglum’s, and Moonglum, too, became quickly bored by anyone other than the crimson-eyed Prince of Imrryr. Moonglum would die for Elric and he knew that Elric would risk any danger to save his friend. But was not this an unhealthy relationship? Would it not be better if they went their different ways? He could not bear the thought. It was as if they were part of the same entity different aspects of the character of the same man.

He could not understand why he should feel this. And he guessed that, if Elric had ever considered the question, the Melnibonean would be equally hard put to find an answer.”                   —The Vanishing Tower by Michael Moorcock

#mungrove #billy hargrove #eddie munson #stranger things meta #meta #writing.doc #JUST FUCKING TAKE IT #no one is gonna read this why do i keep writing these things i know no one is gonna read lol

[sirenofthegreenbanks]

i find zhou zishu’s late blommer (re)discovery of enjoying life and not wanting to die very charming, and incredibly cathartic. even before he arrives at the turning point that makes him go “Oh, actually, I’m an idiot”, it becomes obvious that the nails, as zhou zishu’s choice of fucking off, are a very out-of-character decision. i find that tragically hilarious. liang jiuxiao’s death, the specific manner of it, the entire thing of it (gestures at zhou zishu’s last chapters in qi ye and the arising conflict at large), has made it so that zhou zishu, very befitting of him, loses himself. liang jiuxiao was his anchor, the warmth in his life. not just him losing his life hurts zhou zishu so (which would, like, already be enough to wreck a sane person kfkdjfd), but their final misunderstanding that, because of liang jiuxiao’s death, never gets cleared and that is being taken to his grave. in his heart. liang jiuxiao has readjusted to this new order of things, and he has neither forsaken zhou zishu as the shixiong he loves nor their shared dream. but zhou zishu doesnt know that. he does not know, and he never will. the only thing he can do is find out for himself whether either of them has been right, and realize that actually, no they werent. its like the continuity of a conversation he had with liang jiuxiao before his death, and that he now, one-sidedly, has to finish for himself, without the other person to join him. this is the cruelest thing, i think. that zhou zishu has all these revelations and all these realizations, that he makes all of these discoveries and fully comes into his own, and it is both a result of liang jiuxiao’s death and the very cause of it. his leashed wants have never done him any good; all the things left unspoken, all the wishes left unadressed. in his nature, zhou zishu has never been a person who would, ever, choose death over a challenging life, but liang jiuxiao’s departure turns him into a shell of himself and has him questioning everything he thought he knew, and has him try to make amends by living out the last wishes of a dead man.

#im fine. #really i am. #(cries) #tian ya ke #qiye

[gonegrove]

THE MUNGROVE FILES: ELRIC/LOTR

Fantasy as a Means of Examining the Dynamic Between Billy and Eddie Or Why I Think You Should All Read Elric and Associate It With Billy

This is another unhinged essay from me and I will be doing a lot here, arguably the most, certainly too much. But fuck it it’s 2008 and I’m writing a shipping manifesto bc tbh I think LJ had it right and long ass metas are fun. In this essay I will be talking about why I think Billy would be a fan of the Elric Saga, how this works thematically with Eddie and why I think that the difference in which series mirror their character cores enhances the dynamic.

For starters, Elric of Melniboné — what even is that?

The Elric Saga is a series of about 7 books written by the English author Michael Moorcock from the 60s to 00s, the majority being written in the 60s-80s. They were printed in magazines and then novellas and then compiled into larger books so it can get a little confusing when you looking for information about them. The Elric Saga is a seminal piece of dark pulp fantasy that has been just as much of a foundational piece of western fantasy media as The Lord of The Rings if not as well known by the masses. It’s been referenced by countless bands including Blue Öyster Cult, given Edward Elric of Full Metal Alchemist and White Wolf Publishing their names, been one of the foundations of Dungeons and Dragons entire creation and is the inspiration for the Targaryens and Valyria in George R. R. Martin’s series A Song of Ice and Fire — just to name a few places where Elric has had an effect.

(Also the Eldar from Warhammer 40k are LITERALLY the Melniboneans. Almost to a T.)

The story of the series follows Elric of Melniboné, a sickly albino sorcerer king of a decadent and corrupt empire still clinging to it’s glory from when it ruled most of their world. Elric at first determined to somehow do something about their slow decline, not just in power but in humanity, exiles himself and sets out to travel the Young Kingdoms of the humans to learn more than he could from books and study. Because of Elric’s introspective self-loathing and hatred of Melnibonéan traditions, his subjects find him odd and unfathomable. However, his cousin Yyrkoon (next in the line of succession, as Elric has no heirs) interprets this behaviour as weakness and plots Elric’s death. Complicating matters is Yyrkoon’s sister Cymoril, who is deeply in love with Elric; Yyrkoon covets her, and part of his plan for usurpation is to marry Cymoril himself.

Elrics greatest aids in his quests for peace for his people, and then later only himself when he realizes there is no hope for Melniboné, are his patron and master Arioch, a Lord of Chaos and Duke of Hell and the evil eldritch blade with a mind of its own bestowed to him by Arioch, Stormbringer. The sword confers upon Elric strength, health, and fighting prowess, allowing him to do away with his dependence on drugs, but it must be fed by the souls of intelligent beings. In the end, the blade takes everyone close to Elric and eventually Elric’s own soul as well. This is the most constant element of the Moorcock’s stories, that anyone who is too close to Elric for too long shares in his tragic fate by Stormbringer’s or Elric’s hand. The other is that Elric is trapped as a pawn in the cosmic war between Order and Chaos (this is where the DnD alignment chart comes from).

Elric himself is a handsome but weak and miserable man forever fighting against his own depression and despair as he feels his situation in life becomes more impossible to bear. He also has a lot of sex for someone who’s so miserable to be around which is pretty impressive. He’s a byronic anti-hero, at times really even more of an anti-villain and literally everything about him is sexy and tragic. He comes from a cycle of cruelty and is considered somewhat impure of breeding, that impurity is also likely why he still has even scraps of basic decency left compared to many of his country men who revel in atrocities. Even with him being the least terrible he’s still cruel, arrogant, prideful, spiteful and generally apathetic to life and most joys.

You see, Elric and his people are doomed. There is truly no hope for them. Thanks to an ancient deal made thousands of years ago the Melniboneans are tied to Arioch and as Arioch is a Lord of Chaos this means he is a monstrous corrupting force and the source of all the depravity bastardizing Elric’s people over the generations. Elric as their king is in many ways little more than a slave to Arioch’s wishes. While Elric as a facet of the Eternal Champion inevitably works for Balance and works with agents of Order at times, he is an agent of Chaos because the pact with Arioch which cannot be broken and Arioch is happy to bring him back to heel when he sees fit. There is no peace or happiness or safety for Elric, his god —and his sword— do not wish it so and Elric cannot fight back.

Elric became a very popular place to pull inspiration from for Hard Rock and Metal artists because of these darker themes. It’s noted that Elric’s relationship with Stormbringer is similar to an addiction. He relies on the sword to feel better/be healthier but it’s evil. It has it’s own agenda and frequently robs him of his own will or control over his own body, forcing him to cut down his own friends and loved ones. It fuels him by devouring the souls of others, damning them to a fate forever trapped inside the hell that is the sword. This dark parasitic/symbiotic relationship helped it hit home with musicians of the era.

Many people in the community consider Billy to be a secret bookworm or just more passionate about reading than you’d immediately think from seeing him. I throw in my hat for the Elric Saga being Billy’s favorite series. It’s fantasy, it’s metal, it’s got sex in it, it’s got a very handsome man absolutely going through it in conflicts he has largely no power over that get into questions of fate and self determination, all that shit. It reeks of Big Billy Energy™. You can even see parallels between his character in season 3 and Elric in what I just said about Elric and Stormbringer. Fun fact— The Eternal Champion always bears an aspect of the Black Sword as his or her weapon, though it may not always manifest as a sword (black veins anyone?).

I can see Billy finding Elric’s life and struggles much more engaging and emotionally resonant to his own than he ever could with say, The Lord of The Rings which as one of the biggest fantasy series of all time and present in this era I know many like to use when talking about what he reads. Elric is a miserable fuck, he hates himself and wants to die but he persists through everything. He curses the gods, picks himself back up, gets back into the pit and commits a few atrocities, fights a dude, saves a kingdom, accidentally kills his new best friend, saves the universe, weeps into his wine over his dead girlfriend, has sex with some lady, kills another dude—rinse, repeat. It’s honestly pretty impressive since he so clearly needs a therapist or 80.

The idea for many as to why Billy reads is for a certain amount of escapism from Neil and the abuse which I agree with. But I don’t think that LOTR has the kind of escapism Billy would resonate with because of its more optimistic and comforting tones. I don’t think that even in his escapism Billy likes to be “lied” to. He prefers stories where while it might not be the focus, the harsh realities are there. His escapism is in power fantasies, in stories set in rich and compelling worlds (which yes, LOTR also has), and in putting his pain into a character. I think many things that are baked into LOTR because of who Tolkien was don’t always sit well with Billy. Sometimes you win, but it’s a pyrrhic victory and you also kinda lose because the cycle of conflict continues. Sometimes the exiled king isn’t some stalwart dude who’s rule will fix everything with no good explanation as to why that would be, sometimes he sucks and there is no way out of the tailspin anyway. Sometimes you end up alone because of your own cruelty and selfless. Sometimes it takes the Apocalypse to finally get a chance to free yourself from your masters. Elric is as compelling as he is tragic and he’s only one facet of the Eternal Champion, a being that exists in different forms throughout the Multiverse. The Champion exists to uphold the Cosmic Balance, and could even be said to be an aspect or reflection of the Balance.

Most Champions don’t even know that they are a Champion and multiple can exist in the same place at the same time. I can see him fantasizing about being one. Billy is at his heart a protector, I can see him daydreaming about being a warrior for Balance, protecting the world from the war being Law and Chaos, and never even knowing he was. I think for Billy, who feels worthless and unwanted, the inherent fantasy of being just Built Different™ is more appealing than the “anyone can be a hero” vibes of LOTR.

With that let’s get into why The Lord of The Rings is Eddie’s favorite series and then the whole compare-y constrast-y “and that’s why they should kiss” part.

If Billy looked at Elric and said “yeah I’m about to make this dude my whole personality” then Eddie did that with Frodo. Frodo is essentially the town eccentric who was raised by his uncle, the other town eccentric. He’s intelligent and kind and no one’s idea of a hero at a glance. But he is heroic and he takes on an incredibly heavy burden because someone has to and he cares too deeply to let someone else be stuck with it, even if he wishes anyone else could have it. LOTR at it’s core is a story of hope, of unlikely friendship and heroism that stands up against time, distance and unspeakable evil. It’s a story of faith in your beliefs and your friends. It talks about surviving through harrowing events and the darkest times and how love and friendship can do so much to help you continue on against the odds.

It feels like a no brainer why all of that would appeal to Eddie. Unlike Billy, Eddie has a loving uncle and has managed to build a support system. His life is by no means perfect but he’s certainly doing better than Billy is. Eddie prefers the story where good inevitably triumphs over evil in a pretty clear cut way because that’s what he feels is right. It’s his escapism. Frodo’s struggle hits him emotionally and the plot itself is likely part of the foundation of his belief system. When asked to go with the party he says they’re asking him to walk into Mordor which yeah, fucking stupid, was stupid in LOTR too. But it was also the only option and the only right/good thing to do. Even if they didn’t succeed they would have at least tried. So of course Eddie goes too.

“Man was not born to a world of justice. But he can create such a world!”                ― Michael Moorcock, Stormbringer

“War must be, while we defend our lives against a destroyer who would devour all; but I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend.”                 ― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Two Towers

Their choices in favorite media are basically symbols of their philosophies, beliefs and aesthetics. Elric is one man’s quest to find his place in the world and failing that, making a new world. Of overcoming endless adversity in a harsh uncaring universe. It’s got all the aesthetics you think of when talking about 60s-70s pulp fantasy— scantily clad ladies, handsome sword boys, crazy shit, totally unpronounceable words, weird architecture etc. LOTR is the story of a group of people working together to end a war and save their world. They have total faith in each other and their friendship, love and humility is in the end what helps them win. It’s aesthetics are more classic because well— it fucking codified the classical fantasy genre look. Also like fucking 8 million poems and songs everywhere constantly.

Billy does not take pride in his softness, he takes pride in his resilience, in his anger. Eddie takes pride his creativity and his care for others and his kindness. He talks about how he saw the boys alone in the cafeteria and went out of his way to take them under his wing and he runs a whole club built on collaborative creativity. Billy has worked alone his whole life to find ways to deny Neil’s shrinking of him. He plants his feet when he’s hit and refuses to be someone you forget. He refutes a universe that would walk by his existence, he will not be denied his space. He’s miserable and arrogant like Elric— Elric who only wants to be at peace. Eddie has found is little niche and he’s content in it, but when pressed he will stand up to defend it even if he’s scared. Because it’s the right thing to do, because he cares, because he couldn’t bear putting someone else in danger just so he’d be safe. He’s adventurous and loving like Frodo— Frodo who saved the shire for everyone, but not for himself.

Billy and Eddie are complimentary forces. Their differences create a conversation between them which can lead to growth and change and their similarities ensure it happens on even footing. They’re both poor, from dysfunctional families with bad dads, they both love metal, they’re both unlike the people around them. Billy can say the world is shit and Eddie can say “is it really?” and a dialogue can be opened that gets them both thinking. Billy ensures Eddie’s kindness isn’t abused, that the Shire remains unscoured. Eddie gives Billy the affection he craves and gives him the space he needs to feel peace. Because Billy is a protector and Eddie is a carer. Eddie shows on multiple occasions his emotional sensitivity and compassion. Like Elric traveling the Young Kingdoms, most people look at Billy and see a threat, a villain, because of what he is (a Melnibonean/an abuse victim with unhealthy mechanisms). Like Frodo, Eddie has the big heart and open mindedness to show pity and compassion even to Gollum who would’ve absolutely loved to bash his head in with a rock. And that kindness is what allows what’s left of Gollum’s humanity to shine through as Sméagol, the man he used to be.  

I’m losing mental steam here because I’ve been at this Billy/Elric shit all day but I feel like this quote from Moonglum, another aspect of the Eternal Champion, kinda says what I’m getting at here.

“He had never understood his friendship with the albino. It had always been a peculiar mixture of reserve and affection, a fine balance which both men were careful to maintain, even in situations of this kind.

 Elric, since his passion for Cymoril had resulted in her death and the destruction of the city he loved, had at all times feared bestowing any tender emotion on those he fell in with.

He had run away from Shaarilla of the Dancing Mist, who had loved him dearly. He had fled from Queen Yishana of Jharkor, who had offered him her kingdom to rule, in spite of her subjects’ hatred of him. He disdained most company save Moonglum’s, and Moonglum, too, became quickly bored by anyone other than the crimson-eyed Prince of Imrryr. Moonglum would die for Elric and he knew that Elric would risk any danger to save his friend. But was not this an unhealthy relationship? Would it not be better if they went their different ways? He could not bear the thought. It was as if they were part of the same entity different aspects of the character of the same man.

 He could not understand why he should feel this. And he guessed that, if Elric had ever considered the question, the Melnibonean would be equally hard put to find an answer.”                  —The Vanishing Tower by Michael Moorcock

#mungrove #billy hargrove #eddie munson #stranger things meta #meta #writing.doc #JUST FUCKING TAKE IT #no one is gonna read this why do i keep writing these things i know no one is gonna read lol #the ancient texts #i'm tempted to someday do a revamp of this essay tbh bc i lost steam/track of my thoughts by the end so i feel i could conclude it better #but i need to let it rest for a bit more before i come back to it

[starswirly]

Info dump on Saucer, please!!!! Give me all the information you want!! I want to know more!!

FEED ME

Also, if you want to, you can also info dump on the ship with Nightmare and Saucer! I think it’s called Rotten Apples, right?

Anon my BELOVED holy moly of COURSE I WILL AUGH!!! (And yes their ships is Rotten Apples :3c)

URGH MY SILLIES- I have slight issues and may have accidentally decided to create an entire alternate Dreamtale so my silly oc and Nightmare could have a tragic childhood friends to lovers arc, I promise I’m so so normal- I really really want to write it out in fic format one day, so I don’t want to spoil it but hmmmmm

Saucer lore- quick facts! From Dreamtale, came to the village when they were ~8 (which, there’s a whole lot for the Lore of this alternate Dreamtale [I’ve convinced myself there a lot i don’t actually know-] but basically the incident happens when they Apple Twins are in their later teens, with a much minor [but still impactful] incident happening when they were 6.) they had run away from home on a quest to become a healer, and met Nightmare that way (ish. Again, details.) the two bond and grow pretty close! Saucer is outgoing and a bit mischievous, but also socially awkward given their upbringing-

which is its own thing- Their parents are a human and a nature elemental, and had lived a pretty secluded life. Naturally, while Saucer is a very curious child, they aren’t great with people at times because of that!

Jumping ahead a bit, when the actual incident occurs, they technically die- their body is left in a limbo state thanks to Dream’s stone imprisonment (which effects the functions of the entire world. It goes wonky and the world outside of the village sort a just… deletes itself. The things left are left in limbo, slowly decaying away until the multiverse’s positivity surges and Dream escapes- breaking this world out of its purgatory.) Saucer isn’t the only one to survive, and they end up teaming with Dream to NOT die immediately after waking up thanks to still-pissed-and-vengeful …villagers? Again, details getting fuzzy, but you get the idea.

getting out into the wider multiverse, Saucer is dead set on finding Nightmare and figuring out what happened to him- a lot of time had passed and they wanted to know what happened to their friend. Dream and them part ways, as Dream is responsible for the positivity in the multiverse and as much as he wants to find his brother he also knows that it wouldn’t be good for him. He’s got his whole thing- Saucer actually DOESNT think poorly of him, just a bit disappointed.

Saucer and NM have a whole reunion/run in- and while a more canon-adjacent NM might’ve killed them, I’m a sucker for self-indulgence, and Saucer just says ‘yeah no you aren’t getting rid of me.’

Hence them becoming the eventual gang’s healer. (They tend to be much more loyal to people rather than actions- you aren’t getting rid of them if they’ve decided they’re going to be around you.)

THE SHIP THOUGH-

Oh I love them. They’re just. So much history. An understanding of everything you are and who you have been and still being loyal and loving each other because- well, it’s what feels right. Like- Saucer pretty much defying death and trekking through the multiverse to find some shadow of someone they once knew, who had been grieving over someone who should have been dead for centuries and who he never got to say goodbye to. Nightmare never having to say goodbye again- because they survived and didn’t want to leave. Just. Incoherent now, sorry, my brain is rotting-

#Rotten Apples #Answered Ask #Anon #No I have no idea if this makes sense #Rotten Apples for the ship name has to do #with the tree obviously #and NM’s corruption #and Saucer literally being rotten/rotted/undead :3 #teehee #The fact that you want to hear about them means so much to me anon #you have no idea

[astralbooks]

Girls of Ash and After by Alex Nonymous

Read: 10th February 2023

Rating: 5/5

Rep: sapphic main characters, f/f relationship, brown disabled main character who walks with a cane, sapphic side character

CW: ableism, blood & gore, body horror, injury detail including injuries to fingers and eyes, death, on-page child death, death of a parent, kidnapping & confinement, murder, nightmares, physical abuse & torture, religion-based homophobia, internalised homophobia, possession, physically & emotionally abusive parental figure, witchcraft & monsters

Review:

Ever is the first child born in the town of After, so named because it positions itself as a haven for those who’d rather live in a world without, or after, magic and witchcraft. As the daughter of the founder she’s seen as something of a figurehead herself with much of the town looking to her to be a role model. However, when Ever starts having nightmares about the other children of the town being brutally killed, and then those same children start winding up dead, she’s faced with the inescapable fact that there is something magical about her, and if she doesn’t get to the bottom of it soon then it won’t be long until every child in After is dead. To get to the bottom of this she forms a shaky alliance with Alisa, the leader of the town’s secret coven of witches and also the girl who was Ever’s childhood friend until Ever accused Alisa’s mother of witchcraft, leading to Alisa’s mother being banished from the town.

This book had the feeling of a fairytale gone very, very wrong, and I vibed so hard with that! This is Alex’s first time writing body horror and they didn’t hold back in the slightest. The content warnings are very serious. I think she did an excellent job with the descriptions of what was happening, and some of them even made me flinch as I was reading. He also did a good job at writing the forest surrounding After, with it feeling almost like a character in its own right throughout. Very creepy, and very well done.

A main running theme of this book is religion-based trauma and abuse. Ever’s father, the founder and mayor of After, has complete control over the town and his daughter and cites religion as the basis behind nearly all of his decisions. The society he’s built is homophobic, has outlawed magic entirely, and anyone who expresses any sort of dissent is soon ‘banished’ and never seen again. Ever in particular growing up in that household bears the brunt of her father’s expectations, and she’s terrified of what he’ll do to her if he discovers the ways in which she falls short. Sadly, she’s proven to be very correct, and not even being his daughter protects her from physical harm if she tries to challenge him on something.

Growing up in an environment that is explicitly homophobic means that at the start of the story Ever genuinely believes that being queer is bad and wrong. However, this is absolutely not the depressingly prevalent and harmful stereotype of homophobes being secretly gay. When Ever says that queerness is wrong, it’s very clear that she’s just repeating something she’s been told is true her whole life, and that she doesn’t fully believe it herself but hasn’t ever known anything else. She’s not being cruel, and her internalised homophobia comes off as tragic rather than anything else. Her emotional journey through this book was one that I’m sure will resonate with many queer people who’ve been raised in queerphobic households, and her growth and growing acceptance of herself were great to read.

I liked how the relationship between the two girls developed! At the start of the book Alisa hates Ever, and understandably so given what Ever did when they were children. On the other hand, Ever doesn’t dislike Alisa pretty much at all, and while she’d prefer to be reconnecting with her under better circumstances she can’t help but be happy that they’re reconnecting at all. Alisa gradually comes to understand why Ever did what she did, that it wasn’t out of malice but out of fear, and I found the growth of romantic feelings between them to be handled believably. This isn’t Alex’s first book featuring childhood friends to enemies to lovers and it’s something they’re very good at.

Something I thought was really cool was the way the girls referred to each other out loud and in narration, how this differed, and what this tells the reader about their opinions of each other. Ever almost exclusively calls Alisa ‘Isa’ in narration, whereas while Alisa sometimes calls Ever ‘Ev’ out loud she always calls her ‘Ever’ in narration. From this alone the reader knows that Ever never stopped caring about Alisa, and that the same cannot be said for Alisa about Ever. Character names in narration as an indicator of how the narrating character feels about others and about themselves is a narrative device that I adore when skillfully deployed, and this was definitely a case of it being skillfully deployed! I got so excited when I noticed it!

Alex has spoken openly about how Alisa’s disability, while unnamed in the novel, is modeled on her own osteonecrosis, and it was clear throughout that the descriptions of what Alisa was going through and how this affects her came from personal experience. Her disability is taken seriously by both the narrative and by non-villainous characters, it isn’t an afterthought with no impact on the story, but there’s so much more to her character than her disability as well. I’m aware that this should be the baseline expectation for representation, but disability rep is still at a point where good rep needs to be highlighted, and I thought this was good rep. Alisa’s cane being visible on the cover is super exciting! Mobility aids aren’t something that should be hidden away or that people should be ashamed of needing, and so seeing it on the cover in silhouette like it’s just as much a part of Alisa as the rest of her body is really cool!

If you like dark fairytales or books about religious trauma and abuse then I highly encourage giving this one a try!

Thank you to Alex for providing me with an early copy in return for some feedback. Details may differ in the published version.  

#review #book review #girls of ash and after #alex nonymous #books #booklr