#hemorrhoids | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

phoenixyfriend · 1 year

Text

If your reason isn't on here, just click whatever is the closest.

#menstruation mention #childbirth mention #polls #phoenix polls #shaving #waxing #blood mention #hemorrhoids #tattoos

233 notes · View notes

your-fav-has-hemorrhoids · 3 months

Note

darkstalker from wings of fire

darkstalker from wings of fire has hemorrhoids!

#darkstalkers #wof #wings of fire #hemorrhoids

33 notes · View notes

contac · 2 years

Photo

#Hemorrhoids #that's it #just Hemorrhoids #vhs #gif #text

454 notes · View notes

abrahamlincoln-official · 2 years

Text

Dear Aging Userbase of Tumblr:

I've recently found out that many of you don't know what hemorrhoids are, other than being an "old person butt problem."

Well, congratulations; you've made it. You're now old enough to deal with hemorrhoids.

President Lincoln is here to teach you about what they are and how to deal with them, because unfortunately, as the butt of many jokes, nobody ever actually takes them seriously. So, you wake up one day, you go to the bathroom, and you find that your anus? Is bleeding.

TLDR: Hemorrhoids are blood vessels that are inflamed, and the skin over them is stretched thin. This is caused by severe straining. Sometimes they pop. Sometimes they become wounds. Other times they become semi-permanent tender blood balloons in your rectum. Like varicose veins from hell in your ass.

So.

What do you do about them?

Thankfully there are some pretty straightforward solutions:

Get fiber gummies. Not fiber pills. Not drinkable-sawdust-metamucil. Fiber gummies. Take those every day in the recommended amount. It'll give your anus time to relax and heal without further exacerbating that shit. Also overall it'll improve your life. You're old now and you need to think about fiber. Sadly we're poor and food is [yelling] so, just get some fiber gummies. It can also -prevent- this shit so you never have to deal with this.

Stay hydrated. While you're dealing with a hemorrhoid, you need to stay hydrated, and you want to avoid vasoconstrictors like caffeine if at all possible; that'll just stretch everything worse. It also stimulates your bowels, so you're going to have a worse time anyway.

Get hemorrhoid treatments. So, there are a number of medicated wipes and creams you can apply to your butthole that are going to save fucking life here. Preparation H is a common joke, but damn if that stuff doesn't save some buttholes. Preparation H wipes with witch hazel? Just wipe that shit on your butthole when you're done pooping. TLDR, a lot of these are just very mild numbing creams and muscle relaxants to allow your butt time to heal. Hemorrhoids are caused by straining; if the muscles are relaxed medically, this gives them more time to heal.

Breathe while you shit. This is going to sound like a weird one, but did you know a lot of folks just hold their breath and try to strain as hard as they can to get a shit out? Don't do that. That'll make it way easier for you to burst a blood vessel in your rectum, and it'll sting like hell and take forever to heal, because you can't easily bandage and get a mobility scooter for your anus. So just, don't do that.

See a medical professional. Worst case scenario, you go see a doctor. They can get you prescription butt-muscle-relaxants. There are sometimes surgeries needed to remove a hemorrhoid if you let it go too long and let it become irritated enough. Which is why you seriously should just get fiber gummies to begin with. ANYWAY This has been a Tumblr Blaze public service announcement to protect your anus. You may now resume reading about your blorbos and lamenting the absence of female presenting nipples. Love, your tumblr mom, Abraham Lincoln

#hemorrhoids #tumblr #blorbo #Serial Experiments Lain #dragons

961 notes · View notes

sportsandlaughs · 10 months

Photo

#hemorrhoids #preparation h #gross #marriage #relationship #twitter #love #sexy

54 notes · View notes

bitchriotsworld · 9 months

Text

i had a worm on a sting once. named him hemorrhoids.

then he got decapitated by a child. we had a whole funeral for him and everything.

then i got another one. named him hemorrhoids 2.0.

then he got gorilla glued together. we didn't have a funeral.

#riot rambles #hemorrhoids #worms #wormblr #worm on a sting

7 notes · View notes

saigonreviewvn · 2 months

Text

Bệnh trĩ là một căn bệnh khá phổ biến, đặc biệt đối với các cấp độ nặng thì bạn nên đến các phòng khám bệnh trĩ tại TPHCM để tìm biện pháp chữa trị nhanh nhất. Đồng thời, bác sỹ cũng đưa cho bạn những lời khuyên bổ ích và cung cấp nhiều loại thuốc đặc trị.

#saigonreview #sài_gòn_review #health #Hospital #Clinic #Hemorrhoids #benhtri #healthy lifestyle #health tips #health and wellness #healthcare #health & fitness #healthyfood

5 notes · View notes

medixic · 2 months

Text