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a-town-called-hometown · 1 month

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yippee! apologies if my takes are horrendously bad

my personal take on the matter is that i definitely think the dark worlds can work as a metaphor for escapism without undermining the darkners' personhood. it can be more than one thing, yknow? the darkners are important, their lives matter. and the lightners do go to the dark world as an escape from the problems they face in their own life. but that's not the darkners' whole PURPOSE, yknow? i mean. according to the laws of the universe of deltarune yes darkners' "purpose" is to serve the lightners but like it's not their whole purpose in the STORY.

it's sort of like how, in UNDERTALE, LOVE represents how distant you've become, how easy it is for you to hurt people. but it also literally gives you the power to destroy the world.

i think the biggest reason i believe escapism is at least a part of deltarune's narrative is queen.

queen's whole speech in both of her fights is about how she intends to provide escapism for the lightners (so that they will worship her but also so that they will he happy). she wants to turn the whole world into a dark world, so that everyone can live in bliss and not have to worry about the woes of the light world. she mentions "Staring, Tapping, To Receive Joy. Staring, Tapping, To Avoid Pain." which is like pretty much the definition of escapism

she wants to help Noelle with the problems she faces in the light world ("Noelle. Who Will Be There To Help Her? Her Strange And Sad Searches" and "My One Idea To Help Noelle, Failed") by just... shoving it away for a blissful fantasy world ("Wake? No, She Has Already Awakened Too Much. Let Her Close Her Eyes And Sleep Away, Into A Darker, Darker Dream.")

...i forgot the rest of what i wanted to say!

well first off, thank you for your ask! I'm going to get extremely in depth in my answer, so bear with me here. sorry it took several weeks to write this. the escapism reading of deltarune is pretty deeply entrenched in fandom, and to refute it, I felt it required a full-length essay to completely explain my viewpoint.

yes, "the lightners desire escapism" does not automatically translate to that being the darkners' actual narrative purpose. escapism can be a theme without dehumanizing those who are used in order to escape - in fact, I've read a number of stories that use someone's desire to escape to HIGHLIGHT how they're hurting others in pursuit of that. I believe that toby fox is definitely capable of telling a story about kids having a valid desire to escape, and about them grappling with having inadvertently created a world of real, living people as a result.

(I'll reiterate again that this is not the story arc that generally shows up in fanon. the common consensus is that the game will end in an omori-esque "growing out of" the dark worlds. it's why I have a huge dislike of the fanon escapism reading, given that the darkners are shown as people whose lack of agency parallels kris' own. it would feel cheap if the resolution to that plot was that the darkners were actually never meant to be agents in their own fates. but this is a digression.)

the reason why i DON'T believe that this is a story that toby fox is telling is because of the way the world, themes, and characters are written. put simply, it just doesn't come across as congruent with the story being told.

deltarune's main themes are agency, fate, identity, and control. this is a conflict that shows up in nearly every major character, is baked into the worldbuilding, and is the central struggle involving us, the player. the protagonist of deltarune is literally possessed by us against their will. the darkners are objects that have no choice but to serve and be discarded. over and over again, there is emphasis on roles that characters play - and crucially, roles that are imposed on them.

what would escapism mean, in this thematic context? in real life, escapism can represent any number of things, but in a story, a major narrative theme generally has to dovetail with other major narrative themes in the work. I would argue that escapism in deltarune would likely mean going to a place where characters are able to choose for themselves what roles they embody, or even to discard the notion of roles altogether. a fantasy of control is the only way to escape a reality where you have no agency. and honestly, it's hard to imagine that something could count as an escapist fantasy if you don't even get to choose whether or not you participate in it.

let's talk about kris.

I see a lot of discussions around kris that say that kris goes into the dark worlds to escape. the dark worlds are posited as kris' fantasy of heroism. it's a world where they can seem heroic and cool, a world where they can have friends. this theory makes a decent amount of sense on the surface level, but only until you consider that kris is being controlled in order to go into the dark worlds. and it is not a control that they appear to welcome.

if those worlds represent kris' fantasy, then why don't they get to choose what happens in those fantasies? why are they being controlled by an external force, one that they actively push back against? if it's really an escape, then why does everything about this world reflect their lack of agency? if they really think this world is just a pure fantasy, then why do they care if spamton falls when his strings are cut?

because they're being deliberately obscured to the player, it is hard to say how kris actually feels about many subjects... but I do seriously doubt that they view the dark worlds as an escape. they don't act in a way that is consistent with that. they resist their lack of agency, and what little we do see of their reactions to darkner characters doesn't suggest that they view those characters as part of a disposable fantasy, either. they seem to have complicated feelings on ralsei. and of course, one of their biggest emotional reactions in the game is to the spamton fight. I would argue that that suggests they have empathy for spamton, which is a hard emotional reaction to have if you believe he's just part of a fantasy. not impossible, mind you, but it seems unlikely that kris believes that all this is simply fantasy.

also, considering that snowgrave both actively discredits the idea that the dark worlds are mere fantasy and is actively traumatic for kris... I seriously doubt they'd open another dark world in chapter 3 on a snowgrave run if their motive was purely to escape. on that route, they've seen the damage we can cause in a dark world. they know that berdly has sustained lasting damage due to our actions, assuming he's not outright dead. why would they want to try and "escape" to a place like that again now that they know what can happen?

the only answer is that they have a motive that isn't escapist.

now, as for ralsei... what part does he have to play in all this?

ralsei does play a lot to the fun, fantastical elements of the dark worlds. he delivers the prophecy that kickstarts the adventure. he flatters both kris and susie endlessly when they act appropriately heroic. he welcomes them into the castle and even makes nice rooms for them. he initially seems tailor-made to enable a fantastical experience where no real issues can ever complicate anything, and where the pain of reality can successfully be hidden from. but there's a lot of complications to the idea that he might represent an escapist fantasy.

the first, and what honestly seems the most important to me, is that he doesn't encourage kris and susie to remain in the dark worlds. he is welcoming and kind, but once the adventure is over, he prompts them to return to the light world. he wants them to deal with their more "real" problems like homework. that doesn't feel like he is trying to facilitate escapism in them. a real fantasy would encourage you to stay in it, wouldn't it?

and while ralsei is definitely invested in making sure the lightners are happy, there are always cracks that show. he isn't able to make kris ignore what happened in the spamton fight. he isn't able to convince susie to be peaceful and kind. and in his very essence, he represents a number of uncomfortable ideas. very importantly, he represents a number of uncomfortable ideas to kris.

this probably ain't your first fandom rodeo, so I'm not going to explain all the different ways that ralsei interacts with kris' personal issues. there's plenty of posts on it out there. what i will point out is, once again, it feels odd that a character who seems tailor made to bring up kris' most uncomfortable associations with their lack of agency and their outsider status in their own family would be part of a fantasy of escapism to them. you'd think that they'd prefer something that didn't have an inbuilt hierarchy, a prophecy that denied them autonomy, or especially a person that reminded them how little they fit into hometown.

that doesn't mean kris doesn't care about him at all - it seems very likely that they do. what I mean to say here is that he just seems ill-suited to an escapism reading, both behaviorally and on a conceptual level. it doesn't seem like that's at all part of his servitude towards the lightners.

of course, there is another non-lightner entity that ralsei seems diegetically engineered to serve. but I'll discuss that later.

now as for susie...

yes, susie definitely views the dark worlds as more fun than the light world. and why wouldn't she? the light world sucks for her, and she doesn't seem very aware of the fact that the dark world can also suck. you could definitely make the argument that she views the dark worlds as a fantastical escape from reality... were it not for the fact that she treats her darkner friends with just as much importance as she does kris and noelle.

can someone treat components of an escapist fantasy as real and important? of course. but given deltarune's themes of agency and control, as well as the fact that darkners exist in servitude to the lightners, I feel like you'd have to make escapism tie into forcing others into a lack of agency if you wanted the theme to feel coherent with the rest of the work. this would require susie to be limiting the agency of the darkners around her. and obviously, she doesn't do that. her presence around them might be inherently limiting, just by simple virtue of being a lightner, but she isn't aware of it, and clearly is uncomfortable with the idea of limiting anyone's agency. she encourages ralsei to make choices. and she supports lancer in basically anything he wants to do. her treatment of lancer is integral to chapter 1's narrative, and it seems like that treatment of ralsei is integral to the ongoing narrative as well!

her preference for the dark world feels very rooted in her engagement with it as its own reality. rather than trying to avoid her real-life problems by engaging in a pretense, she seems to simply want to spend time with her friends in a place that isn't cruel to her. she isn't ignoring any of the dark world's problems in service of that, either. she notices when things don't line up. if she thought of it as a fantasy, wouldn't she be inclined to ignore issues that impede the fantasy?

and critically - like kris, she does not intentionally choose her imposed role in the prophecy at first. she steps into the role of bad guy to resist it, but that role is limiting too, and she eventually acquiesces to being a hero. it's never something she's completely on board with, though. she actively pushes back the limitations that the role places on her. I find this important to reiterate when we are discussing the notion of the characters viewing the dark worlds as fantasy.

noelle has a complicated relationship to the dark worlds. susie tells her that it's a dream to make her accept the strange reality she finds herself in, which works well on her. she continues to think of it as a strange dream throughout the chapter. (though, like the others, it is not a 'dream' she entered of her own volition!)

it is also a markedly unpleasant 'dream' at times. she has her agency restricted, is kidnapped, has to evade a controlling monarch, and is even tied up in a weird evangelion cross thing on the hand of a giant robot. it's not purely fun. noelle does like scary things, and while it might be healthy for her to have an experience where she stands up to a controlling adult figure... again, the circumstances make it difficult for me to assume that this is a fantasy she would choose for herself. not impossible, mind you, but it's not the first reading of the situation that comes to mind.

and while she does say she wishes she could dream like this every day in the normal route, that does happen specifically because she was talking to the girl she likes. it makes sense she'd find that pleasant. I don't think that necessarily equates to her finding the dark worlds escapist.

and importantly, this isn't the sentiment that she expresses in every route.

again, there's a lot of analysis on snowgrave, so I won't bother regurgitating it much here. but it's nightmarish for both kris and noelle, and very likely fatal for berdly. noelle needs to believe that the event is a dream, for her own psychological safety, but one of the most important parts of snowgrave...

...is that its events, and the world it took place in, are very, very real.

noelle wants to have the strength to face her problems, both in the regular route and in the snowgrave route. rather than escaping from them, she views the "dream" as a chance to practice dealing with her day-to-day issues. it's just that in the regular route she finds that strength authentically, and in the snowgrave route, that desire is manipulated and pushed until she is forced to kill berdly. she doesn't interpret snowgrave as an escape gone wrong. she views it as a dream that became a nightmare. and those are two extremely different things.

but i haven't even gotten to the biggest thing that undermines the concept that the dark worlds are a metaphor for escapism! which is: this fucking guy is dead wrong about everything.

so full disclaimer - I really love berdly. I think he's slept on a lot in the fandom because he's annoying and weird. which is fair, I suppose, but I think ignoring him hinders a lot of people's understanding of deltarune's overall narrative. because berdly often illustrates a lot of concepts in the game, but his narrative framing as a joke (usually...) prevents the player from taking it completely seriously. he has things to say and ideas to show off, it's just that he's often very loud and kind of dumb in his expression of them. which is kind of the point!

ralsei brings up the idea that the darkners are meant to serve the lightners very seriously in chapter one. by extension, and by way of the literal mechanics involved in a dark world's creation, we can infer that this logic is probably something that also applies to the dark worlds themselves. they are allegedly worlds and characters that only are supposed to fulfill a dream of the lightners. but due to narrative framing and deltarune's themes, we know that that's not the full truth. however dark worlds and darkners are created, they deserve to have their own agency. they can't just exist to fulfill a higher being's wishes.

you know who else undermines that view of the dark worlds? berdly! berdly does!!!!

because berdly is the only lightner in the game so far who does take the dark worlds to be an escapist adventure! he wants to turn cyber world into smartopia. he views this as a chance to be a cool hero. he believes he's going to get the girl, he's going to shape this world to his own liking, and maybe also he's going to get queen to acknowledge him or something so he stops being a forgettable little bluebird. and not only does none of this happen, his steadfast belief that it will happen is continually a joke within the narrative!!

berdly's wishes for uncomplicated escapist fantasy are flat-out denied by the dark worlds themselves. as a lightner, those worlds should be serving him. he should have the power to do whatever he wants within the bounds of an escapist fantasy. these npcs should be singing his praises!

but he doesn't have the power. and this world doesn't sing his praise. because it just isn't an escapist fantasy. he isn't right to view it that way. his wishes for heroism are always going to be thwarted.

so now that I've gotten all that out of the way, let's swing back over to the subject of your original ask. queen.

because, like berdly, queen's entire character arc is about how she's completely wrong about what the lightners actually want.

queen would in fact like nothing more to place the lightners into an escapist fantasy. she believes that that's the best way to serve them and make them happy forever. as a darkner, queen has very much internalized the idea that a lack of control is what actually makes people happy. since darkners have no choice in their destinies and are supposed to be happy in it, and since she personally finds her role as a darkner fulfilling, she believes that that's true of all people everywhere. if you want to make people happy, you just have to remove that pesky personal agency!

so she spends the story trying to force the lightners and particularly noelle into situations where she controls them in order to make them ostensibly happier. she does genuinely believe that this is the right thing to do, but as she finds out eventually, she's just wrong. noelle doesn't want that. queen believes that escapism is why the lightners use the internet... but that's totally wrong too.

while there are other searches mixed in, noelle is trying to use the internet to find her sister. instead of trying to hide from whatever happened, noelle wants to figure it out. queen's thesis about noelle and the lightners is proven wrong even before she personally encounters noelle in the dark world. it's just that queen doesn't realize it due to her limited perspective.

the concept of escapism being brought up with both queen and berdly is not there to say that the dark world is escapist. rather, it's there to say that it isn't. despite the dark worlds being a fantastical place, they are extremely real. to view them as a means of escape is foolhardy at best. you cannot act as though you are above consequences within them.

themes and ideas exist within the story for a sake of an audience. so let's get into the final character I need to discuss here. hopefully this will tie my thesis of deltarune together neatly.

that character is of course us. the player.

when creating a piece of fiction, an astute author will often identify and anticipate an audience's reactions to certain things in their work, and write things in such a way that they elicit the desired reactions. in essence, a writer is directing the "character" of the audience. how we feel and how we are anticipated to react to things is an integral part of nearly every fiction.

that effect is far more overt when dealing with metanarrative fiction that diegetically involves the audience. since the fiction is saying a lot of things about the general 'you,' the audience in aggregate, your reactions to certain things in the story have to be finely cued and anticipated by the author, so that the author can thus commentate on the reactions that you have to the story. the "character" you are assumed to inhabit is posited by the author to have certain traits.

to explain what I mean in plainer terms, I'll use the player of undertale's no mercy route as an example. because undertale is commenting on the way rpgs generally work. the player's behaviors in no mercy are attributed by characters in the story to be the result of us acting like a typical gamer. we kill the characters in the game because we want exp. and more than that, it's because we want to see everything the game has to offer. the role we inhabit in this role-playing game is that of a completionist. you could say that that's assumed to be our "character" in no mercy.

deltarune also posits that certain things are true of its audience. by being written to evoke certain cultural ideas, rpg tropes, and references to undertale, it guarantees that its audience will probably have certain traits, and spends a large amount of its conceptual focus commenting on those traits. one of those traits is nostalgia, which is probably an idea that I'll expound upon in a further essay because it's quite integral to my reading of deltarune. but the main one I mean to discuss here, and why I went off on this tangent about how audiences are dealt with in metafiction, is that we are posited as someone who believes in the logic of certain narratives.

deltarune's writing evokes a lot of portal fantasy narratives. alice in wonderland, narnia, pretty much every story where it's revealed at the end to be all a dream... the story of deltarune superficially resembles a lot of those. this, I think, is responsible for the popularity of the escapism theory. because those stories are often at their end about a child learning to put away fantasy and grow up, people tend to believe that deltarune must be about the same thing. but I truly don't think that deltarune is trying to do anything with that aspect of portal fantasy narratives, at least not directly. its main characters aren't involved in that exact type of coming-of-age arc.

instead, deltarune is very concerned with what happens to characters in fantasy, and specifically fantasy rpgs. if your world is deemed to not matter because it's a dream, what does that mean for you, who has no choice but to live in it? if you are an npc whose role has been predetermined for you via script, then can you ever decide for yourself what you want? what if you want to matter? what if you want to be your own person?

as the major controlling force of deltarune, we are initially cued to believe that deltarune is like a dream. it superficially fulfills so much of what we want from undertale fanon. hometown seems like it's a perfect idyllic town, at least until you start noticing the obvious cracks. and remember what I said about ralsei earlier? he is so reminiscent of asriel, and extremely eager to help us. it's not a stretch to say that making us specifically view deltarune as dreamlike and idyllic is probably part of his purpose in the game.

I would not say that we are posited as escapist. but the idea of escapism as brought up with queen and berdly is meant to strike at the heart of a much deeper idea that deltarune is trying to deconstruct. because if we view deltarune as a dream, escapist or otherwise, then we are inclined to write the internal realities of the characters inside off. the dark world can disappear without it mattering. we can control kris without it mattering. if it's all a dream, what does it matter? why should we care to let its characters go free? aren't we supposed to be in control?

if deltarune is an rpg... what is the significance of us interacting with it?

#deltarune #deltarune analysis #BIG big thanks to tvlandofficiall for being my sounding board and providing the flavor images for this essay #this one gets into some big overarching analysis of deltarunes construction and what it deconstructs. hope u enjoy

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sleepyconfusedpotato · 1 year

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Wildflower

What should Ghost give during Valentine's Day to Jade when she's an actual florist who sees flowers literally every day?

Pairing : Simon “Ghost” Riley x Charlotte “Jade” Le Jardin (OC) Word Count : ~ 6.4k words Warning : Full on fluff-fest, a slight angst, and the good o'l cursings.

Title and story inspired by the song 'Wildflower' by Clay Finnesand and 'La Vie en Rose' by Louis Armstrong.

February 14th.

Fucking Valentine’s day - a day full of love, they said.

He never really celebrated or cared about any of those kinds of days where people commemorate shit like love. For him, it's just like any other day. He woke up today and did his workout before he went on jogging.

However, that day is different as he saw countless red and pink decorations in every store in his apartment neighbourhood, offering Valentine's day discount for couples. He swore he saw more couples walking down the street than usual, that he even saw a man propose to his girlfriend when he was jogging.

Looking at them, Ghost remembered,

He already confessed to Jade during the New Years.

Yep. He did.

Across the London Eye, when the fireworks painted the infinite black, the chimes of Big Ben rang throughout the Thames River, he said it to her,

‘I think I’m falling in love with you.’

Only to disappoint her again by saying, ‘But I don’t think I’m ready yet.’

Had he been a coward for not being ready to commit yet? Jade was a shining light in his life. She knew of his struggles, and she treated him with kindness and fondness no woman ever did to him. All his life he never thought to fall in love with someone, yet here he was.

He wanted to be in a relationship with her. Fuck, he wanted to. But she deserved the world. She deserved certainty and stability while his job was nothing but that. He could get deployed out of the blue anytime – die anytime. He had a lot of things to sort out first.

He saw tears in her green eyes despite the smile. She only hugged him in response, saying,

‘I love you, so I’ll stay right here.’ Jade muttered shakily while pressing her body to his in a tight hug, her fingers grasping the back of Ghost’s jacket.

‘When you’re ready, I’ll be here.’

‘Let’s be friends, yeah?’ She had added, to which he answered with a smile. “Yeah. We'll always be friends.”

That was New Years.

It'd been two months since then. Ghost and Jade had been texting each other regularly all the while continuing their lives. They met occasionally for a food tour as Ghost was a food enthusiast. Their chat was full of ‘Let’s try the new Korean BBQ around the street’, ‘You ever tried a fried ice cream?’, ‘There’s a new movie about a lady becoming a superhero across multiple universes’, and more casual stuff like those. Meanwhile Jade would take him to physical activities such as take him to a zoo, hiking, and even go to arcades.

Johnny had been such a tease on it. He’d been bothering Ghost the whole time in the base as the Lieutenant looked at his phone and typing away on it more frequently than ever. ‘Yer’ lookin’ very happy these days, Sir.’ , ‘How’s Jade doin’?’, ‘Another ‘meet-up’ with Jade?’,

‘Yer’ so full of rubbish. That’s called a date.’ Soap had said.

'Shut your gob. We’re just friends, Johnny.’

‘Friends who go on dates together.’

Soap ran away before Ghost could smack the shit out of him.

But was it really? Ghost and Jade frequently walk together, as friends, Eating at places together, as friends. Watch movies together, as friends.

But seeing that one guy propose to his girlfriend lit up a spark in him.

That's when Ghost texted her for a meet-up somewhere, Jade replied back with,

‘I would LOVE to if it's not the busiest time of the year T_T and every Valentines we'd open from early morning to midnight, so I'm really sorry. We have all our employees working, but it doesn't seem to make any difference.’

He forgot that Valentine’s day is literally the most important day for a florist. Fucking idiot.

Ghost sighed as he looked up from his phone, right in front of the Le Jardin floristry. He wore a black hoodie and a face mask, the black face paint absent from around his eyes as he was on leave, a rare occurrence from his line of work. Inside the garden was an organised chaos, to say the least. Ghost saw at least 6 customers inside the garden, around 4 employees going around the shop to accompany them. Even as one person went out after buying a flower, two people would enter the shop to replace them. The place was positively crowded.

He looked far and wide for Jade inside among the sea of people, until a woman with ginger hair came out of a room with a big rose bouquet, giving it to a man in an expensive suit that was tailored to perfection for his figure. The man paid for the humongous flowers and left the shop with a nervous face, meanwhile Jade instantly attended to another customer. He could tell that she's a leader based on how she commanded her employees with such confidence and authority, yet still had that kindness and gentleness in her way of talking. Her legs brought her around the shop with utmost speed and precision, not a single step was wasted on her feet.

He could only smile proudly beneath the mask.

For about 15 minutes he observed the shop, until a truck pulled up in front of an alleyway right beside the floristry. Didn't have to wait long to understand that the vehicle was meant to pick up flower decorations for a wedding as an old man came out from the alleyway (presumably connected to the backdoor of the shop) brought out a very big, white bouquet in his arms, which size was so big it concealed his head - surely he couldn't see where he was stepping. Ghost noticed that he was struggling to lift the giant decoration onto the truck, his knees looked like it was about to tumble, until his prediction turned into reality.

The old man's knees failed him, and the big white flower decoration would turn into a mess on the ground, if not for Ghost, who quickly leaped in and held the flowers from falling. Ghost huffed in relief that he jumped just in time.

The man leaned to the side of the decoration to see who had just saved him, and saw a big, tall man dressed in a black hoodie and jeans, whose face was concealed by another black face mask.

Regardless, the elder smiled wide, "Oh good heavens! Thank you so much for the assist! My knees aren't as strong as they used to." The old man said as they both put the white decorations into the truck box. "Ah~ being young is so much easier innit?"

Ghost only nodded, avoiding eye contact to hide his identity. Why'd he help him? probably just from reflex, but then again, how could he just leave an old man stumbling to his fall?

"I'm really sorry for the trouble. I wish I could repay you." The old man's expression was so kind it's almost blinding. He wasn't that short or frail for a man with entirely white hair, probably a 5'9". Judging by his quite muscular arms from his rolled sleeves, he could tell that he's not weak, his knees just betrayed him at a bad time.

Ghost didn't say anything to the man as he was about to walk away to avoid more interaction, before a familiar feminine voice called.

"Papa! Are you okay!? I saw you trip!"

Both men turned their attention to the shop, where a woman with braided red hair and dark blue apron was talking from the main doorway.

"Don't worry, Lottie Dear. I got it, but only thanks to this young lad right here." He gestured to Ghost, where he stood right on the elder's left. "If not for him, we'd have to replace all the flowers."

Fuck.

The old man is her father.

It's Mister Le Jardin.

Her green eyes caught the sight of a man whose built and sense of fashion she would recognize from a mile away. "Wait... Ghost??" Jade exclaimed, her face filled with surprise, "What are you doin' here??"

The SAS lieutenant looked up to her with a tinge of panic on his concealed face, while Mr. Le Jardin observed him up and down. "Oh? You know him?"

Jade nodded slowly, still shocked, "Yes... he's uh… he's a friend from work."

He never intended to be noticed by Jade, afraid of disturbing her work, let alone meet her father out of all people.

The father noticed that word. 'From work'.

"Really now? What's your name, young man?" Mr. Le Jardin asked, his voice went higher in delight.

He lowered his head to bow a little, before answering, "Simon... Sir."

"Ah. Nice to meet you, Simon! I'm Eli, owner of Le Jardin along with my wife Gracie – she's inside dealing with the clients." He introduced himself with a handshake, which Ghost reluctantly accepted.

"Sir! Where're the rest of the flowers?!" The truck driver shouted as he got off his vehicle, prompting Eli to walk to the back door through the alleyway, leaving Ghost and Jade at the front of the shop, her face still painted with shock. A lady walked in front of Jade to enter the shop, so she made some way for her and approached Ghost.

"Hey Ghost." The red-head started, happiness filling her voice.

"Hey."

"So… What brings you here?" She surely knew that he wasn't there just because he 'happened to be in the area', so he deleted that reply in his mind.

"I wanted to see you."

Jade's eyes widened, surprised at his straight-forward answer. "Oh."

"Your old man lost his balance loading this decoration into the truck, so I helped him."

"Oh." Still with the same answer, Jade couldn't tell him how fast her heartbeat was, as her father just came in contact with Ghost, the man she fell in love with.

He looked inside the shop, observing the clients and employees walking around. "Busy day innit?"

"Yeah, it is. To be honest we've been busy since the last 3 days. Had to pick up tons of fresh flowers from our fields back in Norfolk, then arrange them for this day. Today's the busiest day, so it's an all-hands-on-deck situation. Also a big wedding is coming up tonight, and we have to transport these humongous flowers to a hotel ballroom for decorations. Biiig money. This is the third truck." Jade explained as her father and the truck driver walked out with two exact copies of the same white flower decor, lifting them up into the truck before immediately running back in. Third truck? The client must've had too much money on their wallets.

Seeing the scene that's happening in front of him, Ghost took a deep breath and blew it out.

"Seems like your Da can use an extra pair of arms and younger knees." His deep voice suggested, making Jade's eyebrow rise.

"Oh? Are you willing to help us out?"

A nod was all she needed as a confirmation. "Got nothin' else to do or to be."

A wide grin fell on her lips as she grabbed Ghost's right hand and pulled him into the alleyway and to the back door of the shop, where a vast storage room was packed full of flower decorations similar to the ones that were being lifted to the truck. There were only flowers where the eye could see, save for the door that led to the front shop. There were huge boxes and boxes of flowers that had big 'Ian & Gia 14/02's written on them.

Ghost turned to the woman beside her. "Big money, eh?"

"Suuuuper big. Businessman and a big shot pianist. Wanted all the jasmines of blue white and red, and we gotta lift them all to the truck." She explained smiling to him, "Think you're up for this?"

"Won't even break a sweat." Ghost began stepping into the storage room, lifting three big boxes at once in his arms. Jade was left impressed by his show of strength as he ran to the truck at an impressive speed, before coming back and picking up more boxes like a machine, his hoodie still up and his mask still on.

Jade scoffed at his feat, as her father came to pat her shoulder from behind, "A soldier huh?"

"...Yeah."

"It's basically written on his whole figure and posture. Is he any special in his regiment?"

The daughter could only let out a light laugh, "Very, very much so."

"Get out of here." His father looked at her in disbelief, "SAS?"

"Yep. One of the strongest, and I'm not even exaggerating."

His loud laugh filled the alleyway as Ghost ran back and forth lifting the flower boxes without a second wasted and tiredness showing. Jade smiled before heading into the shop to aid her mother and her co-workers with the regular customers.

------

“Chacha, the pink wrapping paper and white 2.5 is out! We need more from the storage, please!” shouted Fiona, her co-worker and best friend of southeast asian descent, who mainly works in the front counter, preparing the flowers right in front of the visitors (which worked as an added value to attract more people). Her wrapping skills were second to none in the shop, even to Gracie, Jade’s mother, who sat right beside her counting the incoming revenues and accepting orders by call.

“One minute!” Jade shouted back from the studio room, which was right behind the wall of the main display room while her hands also swiftly moved to arrange roses inside a heart-shaped box. The order had come in pretty fast; she had to make three of them at a time, and now she had to go up to the second floor to get the items Fiona requested.

“Let me get it.” A deep voice came from behind her, making Jade flinch and look back to the source of the voice, where Ghost stood.

“A-Are you done with the loading?” Jade asked him with a start, as it was not even 20 minutes since he started to help her father lift all the flowers inside the truck.

“Just finished. Truck left just now with your dad to arrange the decorations in the ballroom.”

“Oh.” Jade leaned back to take a glimpse of the back storage room, and true to his words, it was empty. “Wow.”

“Where are these… pink wrappings and the ‘white 2.5’s’?” Asked Ghost with a tone of confusion in his words. Jade could only giggle as she never thought she’d hear the word ‘pink’ out of his mouth.

“Okay, so go to the second floor. On your 3, duck down and the pink wrapping is on the 3rd shelf from the bottom - take 4 rolls of ‘em. ‘White 2.5’s’ means the white-coloured satin ribbon with a 2.5 centimetres width. Don’t mistake them for the rest as there are the .5, 1.2, 4, and 5 centimetres as well. From the shelf go to your left and there should be a high rack and you can find the thingy there. Take two rolls. Don’t forget to close the door before you go down.”

Ghost stood in silence as he processed the information.

Before Jade could ask him if he remembered all that, he answered: “Affirmative.”

The man walked to the side stairs and stepped over 2 stairs, disappearing from her sight to the upper floor. Jade scoffed at the sight before going back to her handiwork. When else can you command an SAS officer like this?

----------

“Chachaaa~ Where're the pink wrappings and white 2.5s?! I need ‘em no–” Fiona noticed the new pink wrappings and white ribbons on the table as she worked. That was fast.

She then looked up, expecting to find her red-headed best friend who was shorter than her, only to find a big, tall man dressed in a black hoodie and a face mask instead, who exudes danger in the way he stands. Fiona, Gracie, and the clients looked him up and down with mouths agape, as they never saw this giant man around, ever. The scene looked too damn comical for his liking.

“...Is this correct?” Ghost started with a voice lower than the depths of hell, which surprised the whole room. Fuck. Being looked at by people was the one thing he wanted to avoid, but here he was.

“Lottie dear, Who’s this?” the old lady beside Fiona asked Jade with a quite high volume, who was still inside the studio arranging the heart-shaped roses.

Judging by the nickname and those braids in her gray hair similar to Jade's, this lady could only be Gracie, her mother.

Mrs. Le Jardin.

“H-He’s a friend from work! I called him up here to lend a hand!” Jade shouted back from the studio. Even with the answer, all the people were still staring at him, especially Jade’s mum, and it felt like having ten laser sights aiming at him.

He swore he saw a smirk from Gracie.

So before he attracted more attention, Ghost repeated, “Is this correct?”

“Y—yeah.” Fiona answered nervously, meanwhile her mother was still eyeballing him like she found a leprechaun. Upon hearing that confirmation, Ghost left the items in the counters and fast-walked back to the studio where Jade was, disappearing from sight.

-----------

“Chacha, are you serious? ‘A friend from work’?” Fiona asked her best friend as she threw a piece of french fries into her mouth. The Le Jardin floristry was currently having a lunch break, and most of the employees went out to get their own meals, while the two stayed inside to talk about the man who was currently sweeping the floor of the studio alone, silently.

Fiona stared at his back from where they were eating at a counter, chewing at her fries. “Are you saying that you have a friend built like that with a voice like that working as a volunteer in the orphanage dealing with kids???”

“Nooo no no, that’s not it–!” That was where Jade messed up. She forgot that neither her best friend, nor any one of their employees know that the Le Jardins used to be MI6 black agents, except the fact that Jade was adopted. They both started to become friends when Fiona applied for the job 3 years ago, right when Jade just retired from MI6. All that she knew was the fact that Jade only had two jobs: Floristry on weekdays and in the orphanage for weekends. She never mentioned the other work that she did for the last two decades of her life. “I didn’t mean from work, I mean I met him when I was at work.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah.”

“When and how did you meet him? Heck what is his name?” Shit. She needed to make up stories about him at this point. But what?! Jade hated lying. Sure it’s super easy to manipulate people by changing reality, but she didn’t want to lie to her best friend! Fiona’s the one who’s been helping her adjust to the life of being a florist and a normal life for the last three years (after saying that she’d been living abroad).

However, how can Jade just say, ‘oh so actually I was an MI6 agent. Both of your bosses were too, actually. Not only agents – we were black agents who were trained since we were not old enough to make our own decisions to do the illegal stuff! I retired three years ago and that's when I met you, but they called me back again, and that’s when I met that guy who happened to be an officer of one the most elite task forces in the world!'

That’s just absurd!

How did she meet him? How did she meet him?!

"Ja– I mean Midg– I mean Lottie, where do I put these–"

The two women turned their heads to Ghost, who came out of the studio with the broom and dustpan in his hands. Looking at the two women's expression, he knew he fucked up. He didn't know what to call her outside of work. Her call sign 'Jade' was directly tied to her work as an MI6 and he couldn't know for sure if Fiona knew about that name. 'Midget' was the name he called her regularly, but he thought it was too harsh in front of her best friend, while 'Lottie' was…

"Why did you call her that?" Fiona asked him while chewing her fries, suspicion painting het face, while Jade sucked her lips and widened her eyes in shock.

Fuck. He thought right. It's a pet name used exclusively by her parents.

"Wait. No way." She turned to Jade and Ghost back and forth before standing up abruptly, startling Jade, meanwhile Ghost stood calmly, still holding the cleaning tools in his hands.

"Chacha… is he your secret boyfriend?!?"

That sentence shocked both of them as Jade quickly denied in panic, "No! No, he's not!! Just– sit down will you?"

"That name is exclusively used by the bosses, ya know." She started walking towards Ghost slowly.

Jade followed her from behind, trying to hold her friend back. "Fiona, he isn't! I swear!"

"No, seriously. How did you meet her? When?" She started closing in on Ghost excitedly, looking up at him. "What’s your name, by the way?"

“Simon.” Ghost answered deadpanly, as the last question was literally the only question he can answer casually. As long as he didn’t give out his last name, it’d be fine. “Name’s Simon.”

"Ooooooh so he's the reason why you've been going out a lot after closin' up! You've been on dates!!"

"NO!! We haven't–"

"Yes."

Ghost's deep voice interrupted the two girls' argument, making them look at the man.

"We've been on dates."

Jade's face turned as red as her hair, and her heart beat so fast and so hard she swore Fiona and Ghost could hear it. Why was he suddenly doing this??? All the while, Fiona's jaw dropped to the floor, eyes glaring at her best friend in shock.

Jade glanced at Ghost, but that damned hoodie and face mask did not help her at all. "I KNEW IT!!! I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU'VE BEEN DATING BEHIND MY BACK??? I mean– I am happy for you, Chacha, but WHY ARE YOU HIDING IT FROM ME???" Fiona excitingly chimed to her best friend, grabbing Jade's shoulders before shaking them like she's a ragdoll.

"Wait– Fiona I can explain–"

"Okay! Explain then! Tell me everything! And don't you dare try to hide anything from me." That's right. She deserved to know. Fiona had been with her for the past three years. She's her first best friend ever. Jade knew she could trust her.

Jade relented with a big sigh and glanced at Ghost with a questioning look. He caught her cue before he himself took a deep breath. "As long as she can keep her mouth shut."

Fiona turned to Ghost, "Wh-what? What is this about?"

"Fiona. My dear best friend. My very beautiful friend that I trust. I love you, so, so much, so I will tell you the truth." Jade started before Ghost cut her again.

"Jade where do I put the broom and the dustpan."

"Owh just put it on the side there yeah. Thanks."

"Who's Jade?"

—------------

"Okay. So let me get this straight." Fiona clapped her hands together in front of Ghost and Jade, who were sitting on the chairs behind the counter together while Fiona was standing up. Jade sat like she was being interrogated, while Ghost folded his arms in front of his chest.

"You, Chacha, had been working as an MI6 black agent for the last twenty years, since you were a wee kid, and then retired three years ago." Jade nodded.

"But two years ago, they called you back to this city called… Verdansk, and that's where you meet… Simon." She gestured to Ghost, who nodded.

"You only met briefly, until last October, you got called back from retirement again, and that's when you met him for the second time. But this one was special, as you guys started to develop feelings for each other, am I right?" Both of them nodded.

"GOD this sounds like a Wattpad type of shite!!" Fiona grasped her hair from frustration, "And you're an MI6 BLACK AGENT??? REALLY???"

"Was. Papa and Mama were, too, actually."

"Oh my Dear Lord in Heavens. THE BOSSES WERE BLACK AGENTS TOO?????" Jade nodded again. Clearly she didn't have any single clue of the burden that came with the words 'MI6', 'agent', especially with the added word 'black' in front of it.

"And you, Simon. So you're a soldier. Which one are you from? Navy? Is it the Royal Artillery? Or is it Life Guards like James Blunt?" Fiona asked with her very limited military knowledge.

"You promised to keep your mouth shut so keep your promise." That voice came out harsher than he intended it to be, prompting Fiona to be taken aback.

"SAS."

The black-haired woman gasped so hard, covering her mouth in shock. "...like Bear Grylls?"

Jade couldn't help the giggle, as Ghost was utterly flabbergasted at her reaction as that was the first thing that came to her mind from the revelation. "...Yeah. Like Bear Grylls. And no I don't know him."

"Wow. Okay. So why the face mask? Does this have anything to do with secrecy and stuff?" Fiona asked him again as Ghost still had the hoodie up and face mask. She hadn't seen his face at all. "Am I not allowed to see his face? Wait Chacha you have seen his face right?"

"Of course I have! What do you mean by that!?" Jade countered, clearly overwhelmed by the barrage of questions. "Ghost. it's up to you."

Ghost huffed, lifting up one hand to the upper hem of his face mask. Fiona observed as Ghost pulled down the mask for a good 3 seconds, catching a glimpse of his strong jaw, his light brown stubble, the faint scars on his face, before putting the face mask back into place again. "Happy now?"

"Oh. Wow. Okay. I am happy." Fiona confirmed with start, turning to look at Jade again, "Chacha you hit a jackpot on this one – so you guys are a couple, right?"

The man and woman looked at each other for a long time, Jade bit her lower lip as her expression fell. Ghost could only close his eyes in regret.

"Wait, no way you guys aren't a thing already. Whaaaatttt?" Fiona expressed her confusion because, for the last two months, Jade had started to buy more makeup and clothes, and the sudden interest in her looks had made Fiona suspicious. She really thought her best friend was dating a man secretly, but now that he's right here, both of them could not say that they're in a relationship?

"Look, Fiona… it's complicated, okay? We're just taking things slow right now. Our… jobs have their own risks, and we're just trying to enjoy things as they are now." Jade tried to explain with a bit of a sad tone to her voice.

"So… you guys are friends, who happen to go on dates occasionally?" Fuckin' hell. Ghost thought. How could she say the exact same thing as Soap? Was it really weird? For two friends to just go together doing whatever they liked?

After both of them nodded for the hundredth time that day, Fiona sighed in acceptance. "Chacha, Luv, I might not understand what you guys are going through right now, but Simon," she turned to Ghost, who lifted his head to see her clearly. "You better not make her cry."

The man glanced to his side, where Jade silently sat on the chair. He knew she'd already hurt her feelings by saying he wasn't ready for a relationship yet, but if he wanted to be honest with himself, was ‘scared’ and ‘afraid’ the right word for it? As Soap and Fiona said, they’re literally doing what couples do.

He’s just afraid to put a name on it.

“I’ll try.”

—------------

Jade had texted him earlier that during Valentine’s, Le Jardin’s floristry would open until midnight. Ghost wondered why as it had been a while since the employees had gone home, including Fiona (who told her that they were going to have a long chat on the phone) who had to go home and have dinner with her family. The sun had long drowned, replaced by the moon that accompanied the cold winter of London. Warm lights from the shops and a few street lights were the only thing lighting up the streets - one of them coming from the floristry.

The sales peaked around 6 PM to 9 PM when people finished their work to be with their loved ones. Ghost had absolutely no skills in flower arranging or wrapping, so he did all he could to help the other employees to pick tools or items from high shelves, and even change the lightbulb when one of them died. Ghost didn’t mind it one bit as he found simple domestic things like this relaxing compared to what he did in the military - full of pressure, stress, and blood.

Meanwhile, the utmost form of stress in Le Jardin’s (at least what he saw today), was a customer who kept changing the flowers that he wanted, and then lashing out at Fiona when his bouquet wasn’t tied the way he wanted to. Ghost almost wanted to step in, drag him out of the store, and throw him out to the streets, but Jade stepped in and calmly asked the customer for references, dealing with the situation one at a time, and finally, the man stomped out. Ghost knew that there were more variety of problems in retail, but at least he got to experience one today. To be honest that was probably the least angry person in London.

That was 3 hours ago. Now, there’s only the Le Jardins and Ghost; the father had come home at around 4 PM after finishing the decorations. He took a photo of the ballroom and showed it to his family and Ghost, who was quite amazed at the old man’s sense of composition and aesthetic.

The four of them were all in the front room, Gracie counting the revenues, Jade tidying up the display flowers, Eli wiping the windows, and Ghost sweeping the floors (again). The clock showed 00.23, the shop was empty, and even the cafe opposite them was already closed. As Ghost finished his chore, he put the cleaning tools to the side before approaching Jade.

“Are you not closin’? It’s past midnight.” He muttered to her, who was tidying up the edelweiss display.

Jade smiled, “We usually extend about an hour.”

“Why?”

“You’ll see.”

Just as he was about to question it, the phone rang besides Gracie, who picked up the call immediately,

“Le Jardin Floristry. Yes, we are still open. You might be our last client, Sir. We do have tulips available. What colour? Red and pink, got it. The bouquet will be here when you arrive. Yes. We’ll be here, Sir, don’t worry. Thank you!” After confirming the order, Gracie smiled towards Ghost as she put the phone back. “That’s why, Simon Dear.”

About twenty minutes later, a man entered the shop in a hurry, dressed in a dirty fire brigade jacket. He clearly just finished his work and then drove to the floristry immediately after he extinguished whatever fire broke out somewhere. The moustached man approached the counter, where Jade had his order ready. “I’m here for my tulips?” He muttered, clearly tired from the way he panted.

“Here it is, Sir. That’ll be 18 pounds.”

“Thank you so much. You guys were the only shop open at this time. I’m forever grateful. I already told my wife and children that I’ll be late, but I truly felt bad.” He pulled out his wallet before putting a 20-pound note on the counter.

“A pleasure for us, Sir. Have a good night!” Gracie chimed as he took the tulips in his hands, exited the shop and finally drove off. With that, Eli flipped the ‘Open’ tag to the ‘Closed’ tag.

“Delightful! Now.” Mr. Le Jardin put his hands on his hips, “Let’s have dinner.” Once Ghost heard that, he immediately planned his escape from the floristry like he needed to escape an enemy’s vicinity.

“Simon Dear, you’re joining us, aren’t you?” But after hearing the gentle yet commanding tone coming out of Gracie, he decided against it, as what he heard in his ear was, ‘We’re going to have a conversation about you and my daughter’.

—-------

Fuck. There’s the question. “No, Ma’am." He replied slowly, "Not yet."

“So, Simon Dear.” Gracie's voice startled Ghost as he was cutting the carrots for the chicken soup they're making, all the while Gracie was stirring the ladle on the pot. His hood was still up on his head, but he's taken off his mask to smell the chicken broth in front of him. He figured that if there's a civilian he'd let see his face, it's an ex-MI6 whose daughter he loved.

It was only the two of them in the kitchen on the third floor as Eli and his daughter were still tidying up the first floor. “Are you Lottie’s boyfriend?”

Ghost expected a questioning look followed by a 'why', but instead she gave him a light nod. “She’s very fond of you, I think you should know." That one caught Ghost's attention, briefly slowing down his slices. Did Jade talk to her mother about him?

"The way she talks about you, I know how deeply she really cared for you. She saw her future with no man, at all, until she met you. Had to do with 'understanding one another' she said." Gracie put in more black pepper into the pot.

“May I know, what stopped you from committing to her?”

More questions to answer, but this one, he didn't know how to answer.

“...I don’t know, Ma'am."

Not long, Gracie muttered with a tone he almost forgot. Motherly. “...Are you afraid?”

And that's when he found himself so vulnerable, so open. And the weird thing was, he only felt like this when he's with Jade. He thought Gracie's her adoptive mother, but this magical familial trait where people could instantly open up to them was almost scary.

He expected judgement, but what came was a light smile. “You remind me of Eli and me, back when we were still with MI6."

Was it a yes? No, he's not afraid. He just thought that if they started dating, she might be wasting her time with him. Well, he's afraid that all this love that he's feeling and all these moments with be for naught if he's just dead after a deployment gone wrong. He can't promise anything to her. Ghost knew how serious Jade was about a relationship. She wanted a long-lasting one.

Ghost didn't mutter a word out of his mouth. Only continuing his work. He could feel her gaze on him, but he still chose to stay silent.

"He was afraid of the life we’ll lead. Constantly running, followed by death everywhere we go. Stability and domesticity was a dream impossible to achieve.” As Ghost listened and wondered how the fuck did she read his mind, he lifted the cutting board and poured the cube-cut carrot into the pot.

“However, I can tell him anything, he can tell me anything.” Gracie continued, looking up at him. Her gaze was as soft as Jade's, grey eyes softly gazing into his soul. “Eli had his own problems, I had my own, but what mattered was the fact that we both tried to be better, for my own sake, and for his sake.”

“He was my best friend, and I was his. It was a leap of faith to be together.” She said as her palm tapped his shoulder firmly.

“I’m saying this as her mother. If you love her, then go all in. She deserves all of you.”

---

Dinner was eventful, to say the least. The Le Jardins, plus Ghost, ate their dinner together in their house on the third floor. Chicken and vegetable soup accompanied by warm cups of tea was enough to fill their stomachs. Ghost, of course, had to take his hood down and took off his face mask to eat with the three of them.

It felt odd.

When was the last time he had a family dinner like this? Eating a delicious meal without having to find a place where there's no other people? A place where he could freely show his face to others, the warmth of a family?

It didn't take long for Eli to finish his meal, as he stood up and put on 'La Vie en Rose' by Louis Armstrong on the classic gramophone. Gracie scoffed loudly, stood up, and took Eli's hand in hers.

"Heeeere we go." Jade rolled her eyes, seeming like she had to watch this for the thousandth time.

As Louis Armstrong started to sing, the two old couple put out an amazing slow dancing show in front of Ghost and Jade. Seeing them so unashamedly happy, and the fact that both of their eyes only stared at each other with so much love, Ghost unconsciously smiled.

And when he turned to look at Jade, there was she, two hands holding her phone horizontally, taking a video of her parents, grinning ear to ear while her eyes gleamed with joy.

It's such a warm scene to witness.

He only hoped it was him and her in place of Eli and Gracie.

—------------

The time showed 02.13. Ghost and Jade were standing in front of the shop, a long scarf wrapped around Ghost's neck as the cold was harsh that time of the day. Jade insisted that he wore them, or she said he would catch a cold.

"Thank you, Ghost. For today. My dad had been having regular trouble with his knee, so thank you so so much." Jade started, cheeks blushing that was certainly not because of the February winter.

"Well, I doubt that, considering how well he danced with your mum." Ghost replied, making Jade laugh. Her smile was a sight he'd never get tired of seeing. “Are you going anywhere tomorrow?”

That question quite surprised her. “Well… Tomorrow my shift starts at 3 PM. So I'm free in the morning. Why?"

“I want to make do for today. We haven’t had a proper… date. Yet. I honestly had wanted to bring you flowers, but I remembered you're a florist. So I felt like a prat.”

Her face turned as red as tulips at that. “Honestly, you helping out in the shop was more romantic than anything you could ever give."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah! So… what are you thinkin’ for tomorrow? What do you wanna do, Ghost?”

“What do you wanna do?” He asked back.

“Oh? W-well… Hmmm." Jade contemplated, pouting her lips, glancing at the moon high in the sky. "Ice skating. And then Korean barbecue after.”

“I-Ice skating?” Ghost stuttered, not expecting that answer.

“Yeah. What, you afraid you’re gonna fall?”

“I have no clue what you’re talkin’ about.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll hold you if you do.”

He wanted to say something along the lines of 'fuck-off' or 'sod you'. But he deleted that reply before it came out of his mouth, instead saying, "Please do."

Jade grinned ear-to-ear at that response. She was anticipating a clap back from him, but it was such an unusually warm reply that she couldn't help the blush in her cheeks.

No matter how much she wanted him to stay close to her, he had to go, and Jade said her goodbye. "Thank you for today. See you tomorrow, Simon."

Still standing still, Ghost muttered, "It was fun."

She thought he was going to start walking away towards his apartment, but instead, a glimmer of light reflected on his brown irises, still gazing at hers with such hopeful and wistful eyes.

And before she knew it, Ghost leaned in closer to her face, and placed a soft peck on her cheek.

As he stood back, Jade saw that his face burnt red, seeming like what he just did took great courage and resolution. His face still so close to hers, Ghost left her speechless.

And before she could say anything, he said his last words to her that night,

"See you tomorrow, Lottie."

----------------------

Hope you like it! (❁´◡`❁)

#WHEEEEEEEWWWW #if I can draw more scenes I would #but I'm just so PACKED #might draw more and add them to this post in the future #call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #cod mw #cod #simon ghost riley #charlotte jade le jardin #cod mw22 #call of duty modern warfare 2022 #art #ghost x oc #ghost x jade #valentine fic #valentines day fic

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charlie-lec-stories · 7 months

Text

The Socca Fiasco // CL16 & MV1

Pairing: Charles Leclerc / Original Female Character / Max Verstappen

Summary: Charles feels like he doesn't do enough compared to his partners so he decides to make a traditional Monaco dish for them. What could go wrong?

Warnings: None, just Charles being adorable and two curse words.

Author’s Note: This is a story that it's actually part of a sort of series. Little story time: A few years ago a friend of mine got into a polyamorous relationship with a girl and a boy. He motivated me to add this relationship concept to a longer story I wrote. Since I've never been in one, I decided to write short stories with a domestic vibe to practice and get more comfortable with how to write the dynamics of such relationships as accurately as I can. This is where this comes from. All of the Charles x Max x Y/N stories are part of the same universe, you could say, like they are all stories about different situations the three of them go through. I hope you all like some domestic Lestappen x Y/N. Rate: PG

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It was a tradition for them to have Max make Stroopwafel for breakfast, it was the dutch's way of showing affection, since he wasn't exactly expressive with words or romantic gestures on a daily basis. He would usually wake up earlier than Charles and Y/N, having been always a morning person, and take command of the kitchen to make sure his parters had a good breakfast. "It's the most important meal of the day", he always said whenever the other two refused to eat in the morning. Charles was the worst when it came to food, he would always complain that eating so early made his stomach feel funny and that he needed some time before he could actually eat something. Max came up with a plan, to make sure Charles would eat, he would make something Charles liked for breakfast, that way the monegasque would never refuse to eat in the morning ever again. His plan worked, and with the addition of the Stroopwafel to their breakfast menu, Charles started to eat every morning without making a single complain. That's how the tradition started and Max loved it, he felt like he could tell his partners he loved them, without having to actually say it, something that made him feel kind of awkward.

To the breakfast tradition a new ritual was added when Y/N started to cook a traditional dish from her country every Sunday. She had traveled back to her parents house for a few days and noticed that she actually missed those Sunday family gatherings that used to occur every week when she was younger. Her family would spent the whole day together, playing board games, watching movies and listening to music. The point of Family Sunday was to create wonderful moments together to remember forever. And she remembered them all with love. With that nostalgia settled in her heart, she decided that she wanted to keep that tradition alive with her new family. Every weekend she would buy everything she needed to make the meal and dedicate the Sunday morning to cooking. Charles and Max had their own roles, Charles taking care of the getting all the board games they had in the house and setting up the table, while Max was the one that prepared the brewages and picked the movie or vinyl that would play in the background. Family Sundays were their favorites because they could manage to celebrate them anywhere in the world, all they needed was a grill for the food, some board game and music. If it was race weekend, they had dinner and if it was a free weekend, they had lunch. They spent some Family Sundays in hotel rooms, simply cooking their meal in the hospitality of Red Bull or Ferrari and then taking it to the room to eat it together. Y/N really liked those moments, it made her feel like they were officially family.

Charles, at some point, started to feel like he wasn't doing enough. Max made breakfast, Y/N made Family Sunday meal and he was always enjoying what they made instead of doing something for them. He wanted to do something, he wanted to give them as much as they gave him. He wanted them to know that he loves them. With this idea in mind, he tried to cook pasta a few times, but it didn't end up well. Max had ended up banning him from the kitchen because he was sure that Charles would burn the apartment down. Pasta was off the table and it was the only thing that Charles knew how to cook, even if he didn't do it well. He expressed this concern to his brothers, who instead of giving him some cooking ideas, suggested him to just simply express his affection with other actions. Charles refused, he wanted to make something and he was going to do it.

"I'm just so bad at this, Maman". He complained to his mother on the phone. "I mean, Y/N isn't that good, but at least she can pull something off! I'm not asking to cook as good as Max, I just want to do something right". His mother could hear the stress in his voice. She actually believed that Charles didn't need to cook anything for his partners, they already knew that he loves them and that he shows that love through different methods. Still, she decided to please her son's wishes.

"Okay Charles, I'll send you a recipe for Socca. It's an easy dish and you'll have no problem making it". Charles' spirits lifted quickly. "It's beginners level of complexity. You'll be fine"

"Thank you, Maman! You're the best. I love you!".

It was summer break and Charles had been practicing the recipe for three months. He did it at the Ferrari hospitality every week and it was his most sacred secret. He wanted it to be a surprise so Y/N and Max couldn't know about it. It took Charles a lot of effort to hide his cooking practices, but he was finally ready to cook Socca at home. His skill with the dish had improved a lot, he had to admit that the first ones he made were so bad he couldn't even eat them. His younger brother, Arthur, even gagged when he tried a piece once.

"Charles, if you feed them this, you'll end up single". The younger Leclerc said as he spit the food in the bin.

"Oh Lord. 'How to loose not one but two lovers in one go'. I can see that Buzzfeed article". Charles glared at Lorenzo, his older brother, who was laughing at Charles poor attempt of Socca while he threw that comment.

But, his Socca upgraded since then and while Max and Y/N were out for a jog, Charles told them that he wasn't feeling like running and stayed home. He had an hour until they were back, more than enough time to cook and surprise them. Only four ingredients were needed: Chickpea flour, water, extra-virgin olive oil and sea salt. Once he had everything on top of the kitchen island, he started to mix everything in a bowl. He whisked until there were no lumps in the mix and then set a timer to let the batter soak for thirty minutes. The oven at home was nothing like the one he used to practice with so he had a few set backs when trying to turn it on, but he finally did it and then placed the pan inside to make sure it'll preheated before pouring the batter on it. In the meantime, his mother called to know what plans they had for that weekend. Charles loved talking to his mother so he sat comfortably on the couch and proceeded to tell her all of his summer break plans while he waited for the batter to soak. After a few minutes, he went to the kitchen for a glass of water and when he looked at the kitchen counter he noticed that the timer wasn't working. Slightly panicked, he took the phone away from his ear and check the time of the call. He had been talking to his mother for twenty minutes and before that he had trouble with the oven, but how long did that took him? He didn't know. It was quite a struggle, maybe it actually took him another ten minutes. With a rushed apology and a promise to call later, he hung up and decided to concentrate on his task.

"Well, I'm sure that has to be ready". He said to himself. Sighing, he opened the oven to take the pan out, he forgot to grab a kitchen towel and ended up burning his right hand. An instant hiss left his lips and he dropped the pan. "Putain!". Charles cursed under his breath, he grabbed the kitchen towel and picked up the pan again. A lot more stressed than he expected to be when he started cooking, he poured the batter on the pan, put it inside the oven and closed it. Twenty minutes later, Max frowned the moment he set a foot inside the apartment, turning towards Y/N who was looking at him with the same expression. There was a funny smell coming from the kitchen and he knew that it wasn't good sign. Keeping Y/N behind him he walked into the living room area, Charles was nowhere to be seen, but his singing was in the air, clearly coming from the bedroom. Max went straight to the kitchen while Y/N went to the bedroom to look for Charles. She was about to turn on the light of the hallway when Max yelled from the kitchen.

"Schat, don't touch anything!". Charles peaked his head through the bedroom door and his eyes met with Y/N's, they smiled lovingly at each other, but Max's dutch curse words quickly caught their attention. Charles jogged to her side and pecked her lips as a silent greeting while the two walked to the kitchen.

"Max, what's wrong?". Y/N asked while the dutchman opened the kitchen window as wide as he could. "Did you find the source of that smell?"

"It's the oven, it was leaking gas". He looked at Charles. "Charlie, you turned on the gas but never lit it up".

"No! I did, I swear!". Max shook his head.

"Don't turn on any light, let's just open all the windows and let the wind from outside renovate the air". Charles went to the living room and sat on the couch, huffing and with a frown on his face.

"I don't get it!". Y/N sat next to him and grabbed his hand. "I lit it up".

"Sometimes closing the door to harsh or an object hitting the oven can kill the pilot light". She explained. Charles remembered the pan he dropped.

"I am stupid!". He said, his accent thick. "I dropped the pan when I burned my hand. That must have done it".

"You burned your hand!?". Max and Y/N asked worried, Max running to stand in front of him and checking on his hands.

"It's nothing". Charles assured them, embarrassment filling his chest. Max kept looking at his hands anyways. There was a small red mark on his right palm. Y/N went to the bathroom and grabbed a lotion for burns from the first aid kit. She gently ran in over Charles' palm, him letting out a sigh of content at the cool sensation against his burned skin. "I am stupid".

"You're not stupid, don't say that". Max looked at him sternly, he hated when Charles called himself that.

"But I am! It took me three months to learn how to do the easiest dish in Monaco, which already proves how useless I am, just for me to fuck it up when I finally try to do it for you!". He was pissed so the other two left him get it all out. "You always cook for me and I can't even make a fucking Socca for you, I just wanted you guys to feel like I love you... I suck".

"We do feel like you love us, Charlie". Y/N said as she caressed his arm. "We know that you love us".

"But I never do anything for you". Charles said looking at his lap.

"That's not true". Max sat criss-crossed on the floor in front of Charles. "You always try to cheer us up when we have a bad day, and you always know what we need without having to say it. I think that's something important to add to a relationship".

"That's right". Y/N agreed. "Who cares if you can't cook? You still took the time to learn how to do it just for us. You spent three months learning something that it's hard for you all to make us happy". She ran her hands through Charles' hair and he looked at her. "That makes me feel really loved".

"You mean it?". Charles asked looking between the other two. They nodded eagerly.

"We do". Max's voice assured him quietly. Charles smiled.

Maybe Charles was doing more than he thought.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Well, I hope you like this one!

#charles leclerc imagine #max verstappen imagine #lestappen x reader #lestappen imagine

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antlerqueer · 5 months

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sorry im literally putting all of my complaints about ppl's critiques of leave the world behind here bc it's alll..... like what? so i literally looked up interviews from sam esmail and rumaan alam and i'm not crazy!!! the things i was like "this is the opposite of what was going on??" were actually the opposite of what was going on.

Some criticism I've seen is people saying "the movie mocks Rose's dependence on technology with the final scene" but it was like... Rose's journey was seeking her own solution to not wanting to be miserable and inside and waiting for death?? And she found it??

Quote from Sam Esmail, from Rolling Stone (emphasis mine):

During the early days of the pandemic, I remember how we were all very scared. We were scared for our loved ones, we were scared for one another, we were scared for ourselves. People were dying on a daily basis and we were locked in and trapped. There was this real sense of fear and anxiety. And then Tiger King dropped on Netflix and that was all we could talk about for weeks. As silly as that show is, I love that we as a community dropped our differences to engage with this story and to laugh with it and talk about it. I just found that very human. I love when you can mix tragedy and comedy like that because I do think the essence of tragic comedy speaks directly to who we are and to the human condition. So when I was constructing this story, I felt that throughout all this bleakness, to have this character, Rose, escape into something comfortable — I thought that was just something that felt like a kind of universal touchstone.

Rumaan Alam, the author, also says this to Variety:

I say it’s funny, but I don’t think it’s a joke. I don’t think it’s a joke on Rose. I don’t think it’s a joke on the audience. I don’t think it’s a joke on “Friends.” It’s a reminder that art is kind of a salve.

Sam Esmail LOVES media. He's not fucking condemning a child for wanting comfort????? Anyway. The dependence on technology isn't a point of inherent criticism, it is a point of what do we do when our survival is reliant on technology but we lose it. It's part of the horror. It's scary.

Literally, a quote from Esmail in GQ:

[It] really kind of underlines the theme of this reliance on tech, and once it goes away, what are we left with? And that in its own way is pretty terrifying.

I've seen it said Julia Roberts's character was "redeemed" in the film from her bad actions, which I so heavily disagree with, and so does Rumaan Alam, in the Variety interview:

In that final scene between Julia and Myha’la, they don’t embrace. Even prior to that, when they’re in that little shed and come to a détente, Ruth acknowledges that there’s some truth to the things that Amanda has said, that they’re in agreement about something, but it doesn’t end with a hug. It’s not that kind of story.

(A detente is "the easing of hostility or strained relations" - not a reprieve or a reconciliation, but an easing.)

These characters don't have to like or forgive each other to agree that there are things more important to survival and making it through than Amanda being overbearing and racist. Ruth lost her mother and even though Amanda steps in and maybe saves her life (we don't know what the deer were gonna do) that is not an apology! And it's not treated like one because we don't see any sort of forgiveness from Ruth!

And then the whole "it's an attack from a foreign government making the US a victim" shit. Like... GH theorizes, out loud, that this could be the US government's doing? Anyway.

#leave the world behind #it's a rant folks #i'm sorry i'm like this

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megamind2010 · 2 months

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Ladybug dies how

peacefully in her sleep at the ripe old age of 94 NAYYYYY IM SORRY

Assuming youre here cuz koby told you to come and yell at me for doing this and id like to say first of all im very sorry i just love tragedy soooo much. koby got really mad at me when i first brought up the idea and it also tortures me horribly too And we also talk a lot about the alternate universe where she doesnt die and instead she and casey just move to new york and hang out and get married and Chill Out

but in the "canon" ending im sorry yes nell dies (ducking rocks and bricks) IMMM SORRY! She's subject to the hereditary blue beetle curse of dying in a fight tragically young (she jumped in front of the metaphorical bullet for jaime on account of he's exempt because he has a much healthier support system than other beetles)

i'm a hack so i haven't really drawn or written anything concrete about it but how it goes down in my mind is your classic event/crisis where all the heroes are mobilised to fight off the annual universe destroying threat. this time it's aliens of some kind and while the league and the rest of the important guys are up there fighting or negotiating or punching the universe or however this particular one gets solved, ladybug is down on the ground in gotham helping to evacuate people and deal with some alien scouts/robots/etc that are menacing civilians. (casey has already been evacuated and is safely sheltering underground with a bunch of other civilians, being checked in on every now and then by some flash or another, & her general attitude is UGH Can you idiots get this sorted out so we can order chinese and watch real housewives...)

it happens while ladybug is getting a family to safety and an alien scout lands on the roof of their apartment. he ushers them downstairs and to his credit does a good job of holding off the attacker while the civilians get out of there - nell has no powers but is a very competent fighter and also is decked out with plenty of kordtech gadgets to help even the playing field :] but it's been a long day and she's so exhausted and there's only so much you can do when an alien shoots you in the chest with a laser and flies away and leaves you to bleed out

so there's nell with her communications down & unable to move & lying there staring at the sky full of invading spaceships and flying superheroes... if she could get someone's attention she might be okay but everyone is busy. it's a crisis! and nell knows that, she knows what this whole business is like, and she's been ready for something like this to happen for a while. nell is a very confident person but she isn't deluded about her own mortality... it's part of her personal philosophy that it's cruel to have too many attachments if you're likely to die horribly young (a mentality learned from the death of her mother and refined by the death of ted kord) so isnt it great that she doesnt have many friends? and that she's on okay terms but not super close with her family? and that casey doesnt actually care about her at all and wont be affected by her untimely death past the inconvenience of finding a new place to live?

lol

at the end of it all nell isn't really that upset about dying... they went out doing something worthwhile, they saved lives, they did the best they could with what they had, and they made a positive impact on the world while they were here. and that's about what he's always wanted to achieve so hey a+ work ladybug! obviously its not like he WANTS to die, theres always more to do, things he's going to miss... he'll miss talking to ted, working on gadgets and sorting through problems and making him laugh... he'll miss his family obviously but they'll be fine without him... michelle is someone she hadn't expected to get so close to, but she and ted both have booster to keep them on track

really annoyingly as she's closing her eyes the person who keeps coming into her mind though is casey. At this point nell is pretty aware that she cares about casey more than she ever planned or wanted to and has done a lot of mental gymnastics to convince herself that it's fine that nothing ever came of it (and now nothing ever will) and in her last moments she reassures herself that it's onesided and casey doesn't love her and he'll be fine without nell and You did a great job at not forming attachments ladybug that's why you're the best! but she can't help the surge of intense regret and fuuuuuck what if it was different and what if what if.........

here's my primo ladybug dying on a roof song

Nell's fatal flaw will always be her self-reliance and conviction that she's doing things the right way despite it all. if she bothered to communicate with the people in her life then she might be swayed on her views on love, or if she was less stupidly independent then maybe she would have been working with another hero and wouldn't have been in this situation. but that's tragedy i suppose, knowing how a character could have escaped their fate and yet having to accept that in this scenario with this set of rules there was no other way for this to happen

anyway if you'd prefer to think about nell alive and happy living in new york with casey then please do that. It's easy and free and it makes me smile

#i... i... Sorry #SORRY!#caseybug

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cinnamonest · 11 months

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So happy your asks are open, absolutely love your work, it’s gets my heart racing so much!!

I keep thinking about your post where darling gets isekaid into the MMAU and couldn’t help but wonder, who would want to (idk how to word this) obtain isekaid darling. Like since they confirmed she’s from another world and all that, who would be most curious/driven to obtain her?

Thank you so much for always feeding us!!! <3

Ahhhhh I like this thought ty anon

//kind of fetishism for "foreignness" (of course this is fictional places we're talking about but just in case)

Top contenders for such a thing: Xingqiu would be the most likely, followed by Albedo and Dottore, and while not necessarily driven by a desire to obtain, there's also a likeliness to end up with Kazuha.

Often times, girls are imported to a different land than the one they initially came from. This is because there will always be those guys who perk up at the idea of something "foreign" to them, it has a certain appeal to them, in the same way art or media often catches attention when imported to a different location, as it stands out. Consequently, this transporting girls, while it costs money to do so, is ultimately profitable, as they can then market it as such. A lot -- a LOT -- of men have either general fetishism for foreignness, or sometimes specific fetishes for certain accents or regional facial and bodily features. Frankly, most girls find it just as cringey and annoying as they would in any universe, but hey, at least no matter where you're from, there's plenty of rich guys in a far away land somewhere who're willing to pay a fortune for you.

Finding something from an entirely different world is a whole new matter. And more importantly, laying eyes on you, to traders, is like looking at walking cash. Rich people will pay a lot of money for that... if they can get them to believe the story, which may prove challenging, but they usually find ways by getting you to demonstrate things you know, the clothes and devices you had on you when you arrived, and so on.

Such appeal is a status thing for the wealthy, but more mature guys tend to see past such marketing tactics and have enough impulse control to know they shouldn't just buy the first thing that catches their eye. Instead, they tend to look for personality qualities they know they want in the long-term. Younger, more immature men, however, are suckers for that sort of thing, and are already known for impulsive decisions.

Thus, it's heavily marketed to young rich boy types... and for all his efforts to give off a more mature, sophisticated aura, as much as he tries to seem like he wouldn't be one to do so, at the end of the day Xingqiu is not immune to those impulsive tendencies and easily caught attention. In fact, he's read fantasy novels with plots much like this! Ideally, you'll be just like those characters written into those (nauseating, to anyone outside the target audience) male fantasy fulfillment pieces, some sort of alien species that looks just like humans but are these hyper-submissive creatures that are breeding-crazed... but, okay, even if that's not the case, you'll still be a cool possession to show off.

However, such an individual also has great appeal to those with an innate sense of curiosity and inquiry, which is where Dottore and Albedo come in. Both aren't going to go out of their way to buy a girl normally (not out of ethical concerns or anything like that, it's just sort of embarrassing), but when you take into account the fact that it's coming from presumably another universe entirely... that piques the interest, and could prove an incredibly beneficial resource in the study of pursuit to each's goals. Granted, you're infinitely better off with the latter than the former, based on the idea of researching you being asking you questions and taking vitals and giving you mild concoctions to drink versus cutting you open to prod around at and take chunks of your internal organs, but you know, every scholar has his unique methods. Still, for both, seeing you would be intriguing enough to go through with the purchase.

That all being said, there's not exactly a guarantee you're going to find yourself initially in a populated area. Teyvat has some rather large expanses of wilderness, and there's good chance you'll find yourself out in the middle of nowhere, wandering until you find a road and picking one direction to travel at random, just hoping someone comes along... and, of course, when the one who finally does come along happens to be a soft-voiced, sweet-looking young man, you would think you've gotten very lucky to not end up with a bad person... even if he does seem very wide-eyed and shocked by your presence and seems to be way too overdramatic when he swears he'll protect you if you stay by him (he's just escorting you through the wilderness, right?), he surely wouldn't do anything bad to you. Not until you settle down for the night, at least.

#.mmau

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sunsafewriting · 1 year

Text

for the prompt: do a flip universe + TLOU

“Well, obviously more than one. Two or three, at least, right?” Ava says.

She's got her head in Beatrice's lap, having usurped the print-out Beatrice was reading a few minutes ago. It's inarguably the best setup in the world: she's got the whole rest of the couch to stretch out on, and both of Beatrice's hands on her — one gently stroking back her hair, the other resting on Ava's arm.

“Three seems like a lot,” Beatrice replies.

But that’s not a no, and Ava can work from there. “Diego will help us, won't you, bud?”

He looks over at them from where he's sitting on the carpet, sketching out a new comic. He prefers to draw on the floor rather than at the table, which is presumably because the artistic vibes are simply better lower to the ground. “Totally,” he confirms.

Ava beams at Beatrice, reaching up to catch her wrist, to sweep her thumb over the soft skin there. “See? We can do three. Or four.”

There’s a moment of deliberation, but Ava knows when she’s won. Not only does Beatrice have about six different tells — microscopic, but observed by Ava over the years and lovingly documented — but also Ava has a compelling track record when it comes to this sort of thing.

“Okay. Three,” Beatrice agrees. “But four is definitely too many.”

“True. It might get confusing.”

“Also, I don't feel that a zombie apocalypse is likely enough to merit four separate survival plans.”

“HBO makes a very compelling case, babe. A lot of things can go wrong.”

Which Beatrice is aware of, because she sure doesn't turn a lot of pages of her book while Ava's watching The Last of Us on the TV.

“Plus, it's best to be prepared,” Ava adds. “You love being prepared. This way, we have a backup for our backup.”

While Ava still prefers a general guns-blazing, swing-first-think-second approach to life, she has come to appreciate the value of planning ahead. For example, she’s managed to streamline her morning routine to maximise the window of time she has for making out with Beatrice before one of them has to go to class or work.

“I have paper,” Diego says. “We can write them up now. I think the most important thing is probably to get a catapult, or a sword. But there aren’t a lot of good places around here to get swords.”

“Put down get a sword as step one anyway, that’s a great start,” Ava tells him. “I also vote that we steal a really cool car for step two. Obviously, it has to be heavy-duty enough to plough through zombies, but the most important thing is that it’s super dope. Better than Mary’s. I’ve got to have this, because you know she’s going to out-apocalypse me.”

“Steal a car,” Diego echoes back. “Brackets, cool.”

He’s been getting very into brackets, as of late. Also semicolons, but he seems to just pepper them into sentences whenever he wants, with no regard for their intended function. Although it’s very possible that he actually does understand how they work, and is just drunk on the power of learning a new punctuation mark.

“Clean water. Or some means of effectively decontaminating water,” Beatrice suggests.

Ava shakes her head. “No, that’s too legit. We can put that in our, like, good plan. The second plan. This first one should just be based on what you’d most want to do if all of society fell apart.”

“I’d most want to make sure we had clean drinking water.”

“It has to be ridiculous and fun. Like, we should also steal a boat. The zombies most likely won’t be able to swim. And I think I’d rock a captain’s hat.”

“Or a pirate hat,” Diego supplies. “Boat is step three. Hat is step four.”

“Exactly. See?”

“This is starting to seem less like a survival plan and more like a list of your dream crimes.”

“The beauty of the apocalypse is that nothing is a crime,” Ava tells her. She kisses the back of Beatrice’s hand and then nudges it back up to her hair. Beatrice automatically resumes her steady, gentle motions, and Ava settles into the feeling with a pleased hum.

“Well, I don’t really have a list of dream crimes.”

Ava can’t say that comes as a surprise. Beatrice does have a list of dream bookstores to visit though. If the zombie situation isn’t too out of control, they could totally manage to hit a few of those locations post-apocalypse, too.

“You can borrow some of mine,” Diego offers generously.

Ava nods. “And then we can put your clean water in the third plan.”

“I thought it was going in the second?”

“I demoted it. I think our second plan should be to secure a mall. Then we’ve got everything we need. We can just lock all the doors and keep the zombies out. Boom. Nailed it. Can’t have a boat in a mall, though, so that needs to be its own separate plan.”

Malls are also currently in Ava’s good books because when she went to buy a jacket last week, she got to kiss Beatrice in the changing room. But they’re also strategically defensible strongholds. Never let it be said that Ava's decision-making is too heavily influenced by opportunities to make out with Beatrice. Even though it is.

“That’s so smart,” Diego says, scribbling down the idea on another sheet of paper. “Malls even have water, too, so that works for everyone.”

“And we should get a horse for the mall.”

“How does the horse help with the zombies?”

“I don’t know, but that had horses in The Last of Us, and it just feels right.”

“So then also cowboy hats,” Diego reminds her.

“Of course.”

#we have been watching TLOU and im super enjoying it #anyway doing little short prompts is fun so little stress #sunsafewriting #avatrice #ava x beatrice #avatrice fic #avatrice fanfic

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the-au-collector · 1 month

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So the fact that Christianity exists in Legend of Zelda is endlessly interesting to me. Obviously, it's very different than our version that exists in real life but like... it's just really fun to play with.

Anyways here's my thoughts:

The Ocarina of Time Sages (Zelda, Impa, Ruto, Rauru, Naboru, Saria, Darunia) are saints

So I feel like this doesn't need a ton of explaining. In-universe, the towns in LoZ are named after the Sages so obviously they're pretty important. It doesn't really make sense to me why they wouldn't be canonized. Especially since they all have some sort of powers or holiness anyways due to being Sages.

But Who is Jesus

This one is a little less clear. Since I'm worldbuilding Legend's Hyrule right now (and I love the idea that Legend is Christian) and they kind of really hate the Hero of Time since he failed and all, it can't be Time. I feel like Sky and Sun are a little too intrinsically connected to Hylia and everything. And since Christianity believes in God and not Hylia I doubt they'd make Sky or Sun Jesus (they probably in some way still incorporate Hylia . Most likely, they have a saint based off her or she's an angel. Sky and Sun would likely become saints as well under that logic). So I have a few options:

Option One: process of elimination leaves the hero between Sky and Time as a possible candidate. That would be Four. I like the idea of the whole Christianity thing existing before the timeline split but, like in real life, it didn't get very popular for a few centuries. In the other timelines, it would have fizzled out. But because of Time's defeat, Christianity just gets more popular in the Downfall Timeline. I'm not sure what the exact story surrounding Four would be. I want it to somewhat mirror real-life Christian beliefs, after all. At the same time, I'm kind of on the fence about making the Jesus-figure one of the heroes.

Option Two: Mido is Jesus. There's this theory I saw about Mido becoming a hero after Time's defeat and helping during the Imprisoning War, which is why he gets a town named after him in LoZ. I just think it would be cool. Again, I'm not sure what his story would be yet but at least his is a lot more flexible to work with.

I'm curious about what everyone else things, though? I'm really torn between "Four is Jesus" and "Mido is Jesus." On one hand, Four would be funny, but Mido sort of make sense.

#linked universe #the implications of Christianity in LoZ #lu sky #lu four #lu time #lu sun #collectors worldbuilding rambles #in which I try to worldbuild Legend of Zelda/Linked Universe

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thestargayzingetherian · 3 months

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She-Ra In He-Man Revelations/Revolution

So it's been a few days and I wanted to put this post out there to basically publicly give my thoughts on some... recent developments concerning He-Man Revolution. Before I go into this, MASSIVE SPOILER WARNING FOR THE SHOW!

And also, and this is probably MORE important than the spoiler warning. Do not, and I repeat, do not take whatever speculation I put in this post as gospel or something that is GOING to happen. I may be a bit more knowledgeable than a lot of people about this stuff, but I don't wanna consider myself an expert. This is just me speculating and giving my thoughts and I don't want to get anyone's hopes up because there's a good chance, that what I'm saying turns out to be completely wrong and I don't wanna be responsible for that, so please, take all of this with the smallest grain of salt possible.

With that out of the way...

So the new season of He-Man ends with the reveal of this lady, Despara. For those who don't know... she is Adora. As in She-Ra Adora. In the DC He-man comics, Despara was the name Adora was known as when she was raised as Hordak's daughter. Her name is often used by Catradora fan artists and fic writers who really wanna just make Adora a hot evil lesbian, usually with a hot butch hairdo. It is likely that if/when another season of this show comes, Despara will be the main focus.

Now this raises the obvious question... how are they going to handle the She-Ra stuff. As I have made posts about before, the She-Ra rights and He-Man rights have been separate for a very long time and apparently, the last thing I heard, Mattel themselves can't use any of the She-Ra characters in animated form due to Dreamworks owning them now.

So naturally, you might be thinking that Despara here is just a placeholder because they can't use She-Ra. Except... there are a LOT of She-Ra references in this season that are way too numerous to be just references.

For example:

They recreate the exact scene from the 80s She-Ra movie where Adora is taken as a baby by Hordak in a flashback scene. They also mention Horde Prime existing as well and they EVEN imply that Shadow Weaver exists in this universe as well and Hordak's new robot second-in-command, Motherboard is a replacement for her.

So yeah, all signs SEEMINGLY point to some sort of She-Ra-inspired adaption being the next part of this show. Now, considering the very complex rights issues... I can see this going one of two ways.

Mattel and Dreamworks did a deal like the one Sony and Marvel did with Spiderman to temporarily get the She-Ra rights back for JUST this next season. Despara is revealed to be Adora and her arc will be her learning her true family AND eventually becoming She-Ra to fight Horde Prime with her brother and possibly all the other She-Ra cast are there too. This I feel like it would be the ideal solution to all of this.

2. Despara is revealed to be someone else OTHER than Adora under her helmet because her face is obviously not seen in her brief scene when she takes her helmet off. Technically, Mattel would own Despara outright and not Dreamworks and they could easily make Despara her own character. This was also how they planned to include her in the second season of CGI He-Man. HOWEVER, considering all the foreshadowing and knowing how many people working on these shows loved SPOP... I feel like it'd be really unsatisfying if it wasn't Adora under the mask, both as a fan and from a creative standpoint.

As for my personal theory of what Despara's whole deal is, I think she's ruling Etheria on the other side of the galaxy with Catra and serving personally under Horde Prime. Basically SPOP but a bad ending. The plot will be He-Man and his friends finding out about Etheria and going there to free the planet and Despara will redeem herself and she and Catra and whoever will join team good guy.

But that's just my personal theory. I really don't know what the hell is going to happen here or even IF more episodes will even be coming and I don't want to get people's hopes up. There's a reason I myself have been working on my own She-Ra and He-Man crossover extended universe stuff for the last while so, at the very least, there'd be a fanfic that would satisfy my hopes. I am prepared to be very wrong here.

But even if none of this speculation pans out, I still highly recommend this show to She-Ra fans. The second season definitely fixed the few issues I had with the first one and I hope more comes out of this version of He-Man... then again, it wouldn't be the first time a He-Man series was cancelled.

Hope you find this post informative!

#Catradora #She-Ra #He-Man #motu #motu revolution #Despara #Adora #anaylsis #spoilers

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butchsophiewalten · 10 months

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Findjackwalten 07/15/23 Update #1 and #2 Walkthrough

Findjackwalten updated TWICE yesterday! There's no new pages but a LOT of already existing pages have changed, several of them more than once.

UPDATE #1:

Findjackwalten.com

Lots of these images of Bon have appeared on top of the whole page. The page in this screenshot is SUPPOSED to be grey except for the new bons, but The Wayback Machine doesn't archive that color overlay in the page capture.

If you use something like Ublock Origin to remove the Bon assets you can see the bit of white-on-black text reads "Say something..."

This image also seems to be the same as the backdrop to this teaser

Seeing it now it's more obvious what the drawing is actually of. Bon is wearing a hard hat, with little screws and bolts of electricity around him. It seems engineering-related, like somewhere Susan would work.

Findjackwalten.com/martinguaridasecretanoentrar

This page has been outfitted with three new Funny Walten Facts

"Goodfaith Caring"

This one's enigmatic. Exact google search results are nonexistent (IE, searching the name in quotation marks), so it probably refers to something in universe? It's capitalized, so it's a proper noun. Maybe the name of a company? Maybe even the name of an episode of something? An episode of The Walten Files? and episode of Little Bon's Neighborhood? An episode of The Showstoppers Comedy Extravaganza?????? It's so vague I really don't even know what to say here.

"Sha was originally named "Belle" or "Belly" so that all the names would start with a B and be named the "THE 4 B's" or "THE B PACK" instead of "THE SHOWSTOPPERS", but Sha sounded more adequate. She was actually the last showstopper to be made and a final addition because back when TWF was a fangame i needed a character to balance the group more and a more adequate stage companion to Bon than Banny (too similar to Candy and Cindy from good ol FNaC) so Sha was made, so yeah, my fav showstopper right there."

Something I mostly knew already but was pretty obscure! I always really love getting a look into the creation of The Walten Files, and this bit about Sha only existing as to make Welcome to Bon's Burgers less similar to Five Nights at Candy's is a really fun fact.

"No she wasn't homeless, it was just cheaper than paying for an actual apartment"

An elaboration on the Sophie fact from before. This just makes this previously devastating Sophie information really funny. He lived in a meat shop for three years because the rent was cheap. His whole life is so bizarre.

Findjackwalten.com/poker

Nearly the same as always, except the top text has changed to read "It was not quick."

Findjackwalten.com/890247895yuiowarsehiofhkjy890wte

There is LOADS of text on this page now. It reads like more Anthony website posting, which definitely confirms this being a sort of bizarro 'missing link' from the nonfunctional "Object Possession" link on /brightonghosts.

This "Jazmin Doll" story is completely fictional and exclusive to the universe of The Walten Files. There is some (completely unsubstantiated) speculation that Child's Play could be based on the real-world haunted artifact of Robert the doll, but that's obviously not what's being referred to here.

The important information here is this:

"dOnce [sic] the soul chooses it's vessel, it becomes it's body. However, the longer it spends inside of it. The more it becomes it's ACTUAL body. (Jazmin's body was the doll, the wood was her skin, the wooden arm was her real arm.) it can cause it pain and it can feel everything it touches. this has been named amongst us ghostfans as "Post-Extensive Object Possesion"'

This is like. a CRAZY bomb of information to be given about the ghosts in this universe. I don't want to theorize about it too much since I try to keep crazy theories away from these walkthrough posts, but holy shit.

Another little thing here is that there's some odd letters on this page that i'm not totally willing to write off as just typos. There's a missing "e" and "g" in this bit here:

And an extra letter "d" here:

No clue what this means, or if it spells something, or anything.

Last thing I wanna point out with this one page is the little stipulation at the beginning where Anthony mentions that if the story he talks about is proven fake, he might delete the page. This might be what happened, and why the main /brightonghosts page doesn't link off to it?

Findjackwalten.com/ghosttalk

This page is the same except for this little addition just at the bottom:

This update seems to corroborate the new information on the Object Possession page, that ghosts within haunted objects eventually 'become' the object and experience a sort of 'life' within it.

Findjackwalten.com/brightonghosts

A new update from Anthony!

He's found some new stuff to show us! And apparently the K-9 facility is now demolished? That sounds familiar enough that it might've been something we knew before but I can't exactly remember. The Jane Walten mystery continues.

Findjackwalten.com/btscene

Just a small update, one new image at the very bottom:

UPDATE #2

Findjackwalten.com

The same as the last main page update, but with new white-on-black text:

This is a quote from How The Grinch Stole Christmas, which is... interesting? It's making me think back on notable presents in The Walten Files. We see a lot of present boxes in Bunnyfarm that usually involve a ghost/animatronic giving one to Sophie which kickstarts a Scary segment.

There's also the fact that Rocket was a Christmas present

Findjackwalten.com/poker

A really weird update here. We have that exact same quote from How The Grinch Stole Christmas, and the normal /poker image has been replaced with one with this ominous white face peering out from behind the grandfather clock.

Findjackwalten.com/brightonghosts

Just a little funny edit of Anthony trying to fix his slipup

Findjackwalten.com/poker ....again?

This update to /poker happened maybe an hour or less after the previous one.

the Grinch quote has been changed to read "oops!", and the painting has been replaced with this darkened, almost pitch-black version. If you use some photo editing software to brighten the image, you get:

Oops indeed.

#the walten files #ok i finally.wrote the post sorry i took way too long with this

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michelle-ko-i · 3 months

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The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes

Coriolanus Snow vs. the Underdogs

So a new trailer for the TBOSAS just dropped when I'm writing this, and I haven't really done many Hunger Games analyses. And I just want to say how important TBOSAS is for those who are either new to the series or don't get why Suzanne Collins wrote about this time in Snow's life. So I'm going to break it down for those who may not have seen these connections, or those who just don't get it in the first place. Also, this contains spoilers for the TBOSAS book, so go read it before the movie!

So, i've met many people who don't get why TBOSAS takes place when it does. if you're not aware, it takes place around the time of the 10th Hunger Games, in which Coriolanus Snow is on the verge of graduating from the Academy, and trying to get himself into the University. This particular year of the Games is important for him, because he is assigned a tribute to mentor. He is assigned Lucy Gray Baird, of District 12. Already we are introduced to some parallel between him and Katniss.

Now many fans have made connections between Katniss and Lucy Gray, primarily on the facts that it was because they both can sing, and have a good sense of survival, but the truth is, they are very different characters, but because of Snow's growing apathy, he can't tell the two apart. Lucy Gray is a performer, contrary to Katniss. Remember in the first book how Katniss thought the acting, and the being pretty part of the Games was silly? Remember how awkward she thought pretending to be in love with Peeta was? Lucy Gray wasn't like that. She was used to many people looking at her, hoping for a show. She was extroverted, charming, and more importantly comfortable with her spotlight. Katniss, while she was certainly charming, was not trained to entertain. Katniss was introverted and awkward, and she was afraid to sing in front of Cressida and her crew later in Mockingjay. She didn't like acting for the cameras in Mockingjay and the first book. Katniss preferred to be left to her own devices, rather than rely on someone else for attention.

now you're probably asking yourself; so why would these two girls have much of an impact on Snow? Well you see, they don't have all the impact, they are just one of the very many examples of this interest Snow has.

Obviously, Snow is a vengeful character; if he doesn't get what he wants, he punishes those who won't give it to him. If you hurt him, he will hurt you back. Snow has been able to use this strategy his whole life. but there's one person he wasn't able to punish for betraying him: Lucy Gray. whether she's dead or far away, Snow wants to punish her. So what does he do instead? he punishes those who remind him of her. here are a few examples: Finnick Odair.

Finnick has a few similarities to Lucy Gray; he's charming, extroverted, and can stand out in a crowd. he was--as they say--an underdog, as he was one of the youngest in the arena during his Games, and overcame the odds by becoming the youngest winner ever. so, when Finnick won, to get back at how Lucy Gray used to charm him, Snow made Finnick prostitute himself for money, and threatened that if he didn't go as Snow ordered, someone he loved would pay the consequences. this was his way to get back at betraying Snow's affection towards Lucy Gray.

example 2: Johanna Mason.

Johanna was very much an underdog. According to Katniss's inner monologue in the first book, Johanna came into the Games, playing like she was small and weak; sort of like Lucy Gray. Lucy Gray was no fighter--or at least wouldn't be able to defend herself very well, even if she had a weapon. and because of her unwillingness to give up, and her ability to capture a crowd with her comments and "bubbly" personality, this reminded him of Lucy Gray, he punished her for it.

and finally: Katniss Everdeen. Katniss, to Snow, is the living embodiment of Lucy Gray, practically the reincarnation of her. Even if she and Lucy Gray are very different, there are two things that Katniss and Lucy Gray have in common: they are underdogs from District 12. which in the point of view of the capitol, is the lowest of the low when it comes to the tributes in the Hunger Games.

and that's what all of these characters punished by Snow share: in their games they were underdogs. Finnick--the youngest in the arena. Johanna--the weakest. Katniss and Peeta--star-crossed lovers from District 12. all examples of overcoming the odds and defeating the enemy (which is the definition of a underdog).

Lucy Gray was an underdog. She had the odds against her favour and still one with her charm and talent like all of these victors did.

Lucy Gray is the beginning of this revenge Snow feels towards underdogs. Don't believe me? let's look at the movies.

One thing that makes the movies stand out from the books is how there are multiple scenes that don't include Katniss--even if the books are in her POV. One particular scene that proves that Snow is vengeful against Lucy Gray's betrayal is when he was talking to Seneca Crane about underdogs in the first movie, after . here's the exhange:

Snow: "So you like an underdog."

Seneca: "Everyone likes an underdog." Snow: "I don't... Have you ever been out there? 10, 11, 12?"

Seneca: "Not personally, no."

Snow: "I have. There are lots of underdogs [...] And I think that if you see them, you would not root for them either."

there are lots of underdogs. that's why Snow is targeting Katniss most of all, because Snow has seen firsthand the underdogs produced from the higher districts, like Lucy Gray. Remember, this scene was written before TBOSAS was even published. and Suzanne Collins worked on the screenplay for the films. Lucy Gray was the foundation of Coriolanus Snow's character from the beginning

This revenge, this hatred for those trying to survive is what literally drives Snow to punish them. the fact that they were able to bring themselves up from his iron fist with their charm and wit, and most of all--defy the system that is meant to keep them down. something that he wasn't able to do. Snow was able to manipulate, but never actually figure out the situation for himself. he always had help, he always had someone to rely on--he was never able to do it alone, unlike those victors he punished. but it could also be the other way around. these victors always had help. People betted on Katniss, gave her gifts, she had Peeta.

that's another example of Snow's vengeful attitude towards Katniss--her relationship with Peeta. I feel in some way that Snow is resented towards Katniss's relationship with Peeta. I believe he always knew that she was trying to protect him--something he could not achieve with Lucy Gray, or she never showed towards him.

so there you have it. that is why Snow is the way that he is, and that's what makes TBOSAS so important to the Hunger Games lore as a whole. I personally think that Snow is singlehandedly the most important character to analyze in this series, because what he ultimately becomes was because of a small girl who ran away.

#thg aesthetic #thg #the hunger games #tbosas #Coriolanus snow #lucy gray baird #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #katniss everdeen #mockingjay #catching fire #peeta mellark #everlark

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klausbens · 1 year

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i'm getting used to the idea that my opinions in this fandom will often be the opposite of whatever the general public seems to think, but i thought human nature and family of blood were just... okay. they're very... charming episodes, to be sure, the storyline is novel and the sets, cinematography, costumes and acting are great, i just feel like it left me feeling bitter more than it left me thinking ‘oh, that's a nice episode!’

this, of course, mostly resides in how martha was treated as a character. after two episodes which, more or less, seemed to highlight her qualities and actions and existence beside her feelings for the doctor, we're back at it. and i'm tired of martha being sandboxed in them. and i know that's the whole thing with her storyline, but it's so hurtful to witness over and over how she'll basically never be enough for the doctor, no matter the universe—mostly because so little of it rings true to me. i do not believe ten would never look at her twice. i do not believe there is no way he could fall for her. i do not believe he doesn't like her. he surely likes her enough to flirt with her, and the writers have such fun planting all those little innuendos in his dialogue toward (or regarding) her, but it's like they take some sort of perverse pleasure out of then shutting the door in her face and trying to make the audience believe that's rightful and that she has no reason to be hurt by it. it's exhausting.

martha does have the single most important role here, as she does in quite the number of episodes in her run as the companion. i always joke that the doctor would have regenerated 53 million times if it wasn't for martha, but that's actually not much of a joke. she's saved him so many times. and when, at the beginning, the doctor asks her whether she trusts him, what he really should've done is he should've told her “i trust you”, because the whole thing boiled down to martha having to fix his mess and the doctor 100% believing she would. at least he said something about everything being in her hands, which could be counted as implicit admission of trust, but yeah. the dialogue implying she is the one to have to trust that the doctor will come back to her, despite having to be the one to make him come back, is just...

i adore ten. he is the reason i started watching the show—well, tennant is—and i felt his absence so much during these two episodes that when john smith briefly spoke in the tenth doctor way of speaking my heart grew three sizes, but there's something deeply... off with his characterization at times. or maybe it isn't off, as such, just his flaws are highlighted a lot more than other doctors'—which is fine, per se, he's a 900+ old alien i don't want, need nor expect him to be perfect. it's just, coupled with the questionable general arc of this season with martha and him always in this wobbly, awkward spot between friendship and something else, and the way they seem to use martha as a cushion to fall back onto and punch when the doctor fucks up, it leaves a bad aftertaste in my mouth i guess. specifically because i think too much, and i often think about how so many people dislike martha for things that have so little to do with her and so much to do with the absence of rose, the faults of the doctor and the disservice the writers did to what could've been—and has been, if you look at her—an amazing character. a widely beloved one.

you know what, the episode would have been fine. john smith wasn't the doctor, he had this thing with the nurse or whatever, fine. part of the plot, i guess, was that of course he wouldn't have wanted to give humanity up, and what better reason not to want that than to feel love while trapped as a human? fine. but what i don't really get, and what makes me feel a little sick to my stomach actually, is the ending. where he goes back and talks to joan and asks her, or really, when you think about it, tries to manipulate her into coming with him. that's nothing new, the doctor is pretty manipulative and always has been, but he usually uses the allure of space-time travel and breathtaking sights and incredible adventures to basically kidnap his companions like some sort of old ass peter pan, and he's honest with it. he does genuinely think, every time, that what he'll offer the people he takes with him is so much better than whatever they might be thinking of doing with their lives that they will ultimately be happy they followed him. and they are, until they aren't, because that's the tragedy in doctor who for you, but here. here, he uses feelings. he uses joan's feelings for john and somehow promises her he's still capable of whatever john was, including falling for her. and why would he do that. that's just mean. to joan, to martha, hell, even to himself. i really have absolutely no clue what they were trying to do with this scene except, as i said, highlighting his flaws. because he knows damn well. he knows damn well that, even if he were to fall for her, she'd have to leave or die and it would break both of their hearts. that's the whole theme with him, isn't it? i thought it was. he's just experienced that with rose and he's keeping everyone at arms-length because he doesn't want it to happen again, and that's understandable. but then he goes and does this. i don't know. i simply don't know. there's also the whole thing where joan tells him she wants nothing to do with him, because she's in love with john—not some doctor—and he, the doctor, has caused so much harm choosing that specific place in space-time to hide. and the thing is, he's so creepy in that whole scene. when he speaks to her, the things he says, how he says them, how he looks at her when she calls him out. amazing acting, but there's something so dark about him in these episodes that i can't help but want to crawl out of my skin.

one might argue that he tried to get her to come with him because he remembered what john felt for her, or at least what happened between them. and that's further sustained by them hinting at him remembering what martha said to him about him being everything, and her loving him to bits. but that just makes it feel more gratuitously mean to everyone involved (so, ten as well), and steeps the two episodes in this... bitterness, which takes from the overall enjoyment. for me, at least.

there's also other things i disliked about the ep, like when in the video the doctor tells martha ‘you. don't make me leave you behind’ which kind of sounds like he was expecting he would? same way as he was expecting he'd hurt people because that's what humans do, which i agree with, but why underline the fact that he was potentially going to leave her? of course she would have stayed close in order to make him turn back to himself, i don't think that really needed saying. that's just one of the little jabs to martha the writers love to insert in scripts. thing is, i despise them! anyway, the post is long as it is, just—if there's one thing i loved (and it wasn't nearly enough to make up for the rest, but,), it was the way ten hugs martha after he tells her ‘thanks for looking after me’. with his eyes closed and that genuine, childlike smile. engulfing her completely. i so wish things had gone differently between them.

#doctor who #tenth doctor #martha jones #tenmartha #david tennant #freema agyeman #10th doctor #doctor who meta #meta

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adamworu · 1 month

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Have you seen Codex Entry's video titled "The End of Evangelion Is (Not) A Happy Ending - An Analysis & Critique"? She makes a lot of interesting points in that.

First things first, it keeps hitting me how numerous the death threats were that GAINAX got. The contempt of man, followed by a disgusting lack of consequence has always been a central theme in Evangelion. Seeing just how painful the imitation of art to life is feels like opening old wounds. They were instrumental in EoE's conception among other things (Anno putting his feelings into film being another). The quick flashes of ire in written form really helps give EoE that unshakable bitter, pessimistic feel.

(warning for strong personal talks of suicide under the cut)

Anno's mental health worsened at the main series' end. People weren't satisfied with how it ended. They drove him to the point of contemplating suicide. If Anno's reflection of himself manifest through some of the characters, this makes Shinji's state before the infamous sequence even more haunting.

The interviewer asked 'What stopped you?' to which Anno replies 'The prospect of pain. I didn't mind dying I didn't want it to hurt.'

I didn't want it to hurt.

As someone with fluctuating highs and lows of mental health, this struck me more than I'd like to admit. During my periods of contemplating ending it all, one of my greatest fears was the pain. That death isn't the peaceful embrace from it all. That your lasting regrets die with you as your loved ones would eventually find you and become horrified at the fleshy shell that once had a name. You hear their faint screams, your strength is all but gone, and that flickering light within you is snuffed forever.

'Faced with the reality, I stopped.'

I think there's something even more painful about the end. There is no pain, but was lies on the other side...if anything?

EoE asks what if self-loathing becomes our being? Who you are affects your very being. And Shinji's self-hatred seeps into the cast, then the whole world. Considering Shinji's status as an audience surrogate, this sort of thing is very much aimed at the audience, especially those targeting Anno and GAINAX.

I personally don't think, however that EoE is an inverse to EoTV (series end). I do agree with her (Codex Entry), however that EoE is the horrifying reality of if the wrong person turns their back on humanity. EoE is more the explicit version on how humanity came to be in Instrumentality. I still wouldn't call it pessimistic even after all these years. EoTV sees the characters with more self-fulfilled arcs in the very end. There's a sense of catharsis from cast and viewer alike from having climbed a mountain of epiphany and acceptance. EoTV feels more convenient, albeit not unnaturally so.

EoE is more explicit with Shinji's flaws. They stare him in the face with no hesitation. These fears are far uglier and portray him less favorably. Less sympathetically. He views the girls and women around him as how they'd be of benefit. His ire isn't just about the realization that they're people with feelings and complexities deserving of empathy. It's also that those girls and women can as well as do hold the right to exist without him. He sentences the whole world to metaphorical death by way of relinquishment of the AT Field due to his own insecurities. His locus of control is viewed externally. His deterministic point of view harms everyone around him. The train scene is shown here and it parallels his talk with Leliel in episode 16. He blames his reality rather than hold himself accountable.

This is the importance of 'What is your hand for?' It's a gentle nudge into the prospect of free will. It's not just a doctrine of freedom, but one that argues that you are culpable.

My one and only pet peeve with the essay is the confusion of happiness and positivity multiple times throughout. EoE isn't happy, but it is positive. If we were to look at EoE as its own universe rather than a metatext, it is intensely depressing. It tells you that with your hands you can better the world around you. With the fact that it's self-aware considered, it acts as a cautionary tale, that intense self-loathing and disdain serves not just to poison you, but others. We don't all have the ability to damn the human race to metaphorical death until to bring them back because we don't exist. Shinji is understood in Codex' video to be an audience surrogate to great detail. EoE is the existence that did not want to be. Rather than being nihilistic and ireful, it grabs the audience with trembling fingers, saying 'For the love of God, be empathetic. It won't kill you! You are ruining everyone around you with your contempt for outside agency and your arrogance. Please...!'

End of Evangelion is Nyquil. It tastes strong and it tastes bad. Everyone needs bad tasting medicine if they want to get well. So drink the damn medicine.

#neon genesis evangelion #end of evangelion #nge #eva #correct me if i'm wrong #suicide mention

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darklinaforever · 5 months

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Sylki is not incest / autocest / selfcest :

So… I risk repeating myself, but I really hate hearing that Sylki is incest, or autocest. Quite simply because it's not true.

Incest : Sexual relations between close relatives (marriage is prohibited) ; incestuous love.

Sylvie and Loki are not close relatives, for the simple reason that they do not share the same blood / DNA. (Variant = genetically distinct) Beyond that, they didn't even grow up / live together, so also can't be bonded like Loki is with his adoptive family.

Autocest : The act of cloning oneself and having sexual relations with said clone.

First of all, Sylvie is not a clone of Loki. She was conceived naturally and born naturally. And even as a variant of Loki she is not him. Once again, she does not share the same blood / DNA as the latter. Beyond that, in terms of pure personality, no, she's not the same as him. They act differently and think differently. Episode 3 is probably the one that illustrates this best during season 1. The number of times Loki points out that he would not act the way Sylvie acts and she replies that, well, she is not not him. Which is completely normal, since the two have not had the same life experiences. What shapes who we are as a person is the trials of life, our experiences. And Loki and Sylvie definitely didn't have the same ones.

“My interpretation of it is that they're both Lokis, but they aren't the same person. I don't see them as being like brother and sister. They have completely different backgrounds… and I think that's really important to her character.” - Kate Herron.

So in summary, they don't share the same blood / DNA. They also don't have the same experiences, so as a result they have different personalities.

So… literally, this incest and autocest bullshit has no backing.

The whole series spends its time reminding us that Sylvie is not Loki. She says it herself several times. Moreover, to clearly reinforce this trait, “Sylvie” is literally a name that she chose for herself, precisely to differentiate herself from Lokis. It's hammered home throughout the series, Sylvie is her own person. This is also why Loki reminds Mobius that Sylvie, well, her name is Sylvie, when he tells him that he has fallen in love with himself, in 1x04. To remind the viewer that no, Sylvie is not Loki, she is again her own person. And it's problematic for me when so many people try so hard to reduce her to being a Loki. Even from those who love her. Simply because it's something Sylvie hates : Being called / cathegorized by Loki. (Probably because it removes the impression of being a person and brings it back to the fact that the TVA only sees her as a variant, and therefore that she should not exist, knowing that she just wants to have a life and live it)

“Also, Sylvie's not Loki. Sylvie is Sylvie.” - Tom Hiddleston.

The only thing Sylvie and Loki really share internally is being the deity of mischief. Which translates into a role / identity given to them within the universe / timeline they came from, with the same power base ; the witchcraft. Something that is learned and not transmitted by genetics in the MCU universe. So there is nothing biological about it that could relate to incest and even less to autocest.

“They sort of have the same role in terms of the universe and destiny, but they won't make the same decisions.” - Kate Herron.

Are Sylvie and Loki alike ? Yes. But no more than other fictional couples are capable of being. That they resemble each other in some way is not proof that they are the same person. Especially since as said previously, they do not have the same personalities / lived / dna / blood...

Once again, Reylo is the perfect example in terms of comparison to Sylki : - Different, but complicated pasts which return them to their feeling of loneliness. - Their problem of opening up to the world because of there traumas. - The feeling that no one else really understands them. - Similarity in combat techniques and synchronization of movements at various times, etc.

Then, something else that both annoys me and makes me laugh a lot… It's those who use Sylvie's line during episode 5 from season 1, namely “we're the same”, the only one of its kind you will notice in Sylvie's mouth, but ardently use by the antis to prove themselves right in their argument that Sylvie is absolutely the same person as Loki, so that the relationship is considered incest, or autocest. So… I don't know what these people's consumption of cinematic media is, but they must have missed a lot of romances… No, because it's a classic phrase / expression in this area, to express that two characters are alike ! Example :

Telling another person “we're the same” is not a contradiction to “I am not you”. And I can't believe this is something I have to explain / needs to be explained to some people.

“I think he realizes, and she realizes, that while they're the same, they're not the same.” - Tom Hiddleston.

I mean... No one is seriously going to say that the spidermans of the Marvel shared universe are the same person. Are they ? Because I've never seen anyone do it. Normal. Since that would just be completely stupid ! No ? Also, directly in the case of the MCU we were treated to Thor and Jane, both being thunder deities, which didn't bother anyone, according to my memories !

The fact that Sylvie is a variant of Loki with whom he falls in love is specifically there to bring about the rather clear metaphor / symbolism of Loki learning to finally love himself as a person (besides loving someone else entirely), even though he considers himself a monster. Because yes, Loki's narcissism is essentially just a cover to hide how monstrous he feels, something I feel like a lot of people forget.

Loki “falls in love with himself”, as Mobius describes it, is not proof of vanity / narcissism which would prevent any evolution of Loki as Mobius and some antis claim. On the contrary, Loki's love for Sylvie not only leads him to see himself differently, but also allows him a real positive evolution.

“to me, is ultimately about self-love, self-reflection and forgiving yourself, it just felt right that that would be Loki's first real love story.” - Michael Waldron.

“I don't think Loki's relationship with himself has been very healthy,” Tom Hiddleston explains. “Trying to accept those aspects of himself, which he's been on the run from, was a way of thinking about that in a really interesting way.”

Besides, in the end, to rephrase in a clearer sense, Loki falls in love with Sylvie as much because he sees himself in her (the metaphor of the dagger in 1x03) as he finds her amazing as a person (Loki discovering Sylvie's story at the start of episode 4 on Lamentis).

Something that is once again nothing surprising in a romance. Many couples fall in love because they find themselves in the person they love, in addition to for the differences they share. Even if Loki's metaphor for love with the dagger is not entirely correct, the aspect of seeing oneself in it is for some a truth.

“Love [...]. You can see yourself in it.” - Loki, 1x03.

“When Loki meets Sylvie, he's inspired solely by curiosity,” reveals Hiddleston. “He wants to talk to her and understand her and try to discern what was similar about their experiences, and what was different. He keeps asking her questions because he wants to see if his experience was also her experience. I think he realizes, and she realizes, that while they're the same, they're not the same.”

So, not only does the incest and autocest argument not work, but the similarities these two share (which seem to bother so many people) and the reason(s) they fall in love, well are in is more of a classic fictional couple coding question designed to represent either the complementarity aspect or the soulmate aspect.

Sylki is essentially two sides of the same coin, or mirrors of each other, like many fictional romantic relationships. (Reylo again for exemple !) Which consequently causes their influence on each other. Because yes, not only does Sylki falling in love influence Loki, but also Sylvie.

Loki obviously learns, as I have already said, to love himself, but also to love someone else unconditionally, to trust them fully. He also learns a new form of magic, and in the end, he even starts playing the hero. Sylvie learns for the first time in her life to trust someone, to open up, to form a team and above all finally develops her first good memories. People often say that Sylvie is incapable of sacrificing herself for anyone, but the truth is that she literally scrambled herself to have a chance of finding Loki, when she wasn't even sure that It would work and perhaps simply kill her, therefore indirectly committing suicide. Additionally, it is also emphasized how Sylki is stronger together than apart.

“They are a mirror to each other. They challenge each other, and out of the challenge, they grow together.” - Tom Hiddleston.

With everything I have just explained / demonstrated, I really have a hard time understanding how this ship can be so controversial / misunderstood…

I don't find the series very subtle on the message for Sylki and beyond that, the writers and actors themselves have already explained these same things in a more condensed way in several interviews.

I mean, I am aware that sometimes the words of directors, screenwriters and actors can be stupid and incoherent (the case of the HOTD series being the perfect example of that…), but here, don't mess around, the series (at least season 1) was very well constructed and visibly thought out.

Really, I don't understand. One of the reasons why people are so uncomfortable is surely and simply maybe the term variants (and again it's because I'm nice...), which for these people necessarily equates to being the same person in all the meanings of the term, which, as we have demonstrated throughout this post, is absolutely not the case… Which can be verified by the series itself, the interviews with the writers and actors which agree with what is shown on the screen, etc. Knowing that in addition I have seen tons of people on tumblr with absolutely remarkable analytical skills (and therefore also in terms of symbolism) yet surprisingly not understanding what the Sylki relationship is, defining it instead as a incest / autocest…

So I can only at this stage, for me at least, deduce that this kind of talk about Sylki is willful and stubborn ignorance from people who simply don't like the ship, trying to justify it from a more “reasonable” and or perhaps “intellectual” way, no idea… than a simple “I don't like it, because tastes cannot be controlled”. Which is OK, because everyone has the right to like what they like / want !

On the other hand, spreading or saying bullshit / false things about the ship in question, to persuade people not to / no longer like it, is something I can't stand.

Please note, everyone is free to say whatever they want, as long as they clarify once again that it is their personal opinion. I am talking about people who speak of their opinion about this ship (or any ship) as fact while making fun of others who like it, make them feel guilty / horrible, or trying to change people's tastes…

Is Sylki weird ? Yes, of course. We are talking about two variants with the same identity falling in love ! Obviously the viewer will find this strange, because it's a concept almost never seen before after all in tv, and complex. But it doesn't necessarily mean bad, toxic, perverse, immoral or unhealthy relationship as the antis argue (knowing that in addition it is in contradiction with the positive message about love for oneself that the relationship transmits), notably to try to take down the ship, especially since Sophia di Martino said she found Sylki “weird”. Which is infuriating, because they act as if the actress's opinion is dominant over those directly writing the story, and that her simple opinion will change the minds of Sylki's fans or should condemn the ship to any possible future ! But also it is mostly infuriating because, well, beyond that, as @where-theres-smoak-2 so well pointed out :

“when you actually look at the definition of the word weird it doesn't necessarily mean something bad. The definition from Cambridge dictionary is : very strange and unusual, unexpected, or not natural. The Merriam-Webster definition is : of strange or extraordinary character, of, relating to, or caused by witchcraft or the supernatural. Which lets be honest fits Sylki, they are unusual, strange, unexpected, extraordinary and you could argue with the whole variant thing its got that supernatural element to it as well. I mean them being weird is what makes them fun and entertaining to watch so honestly I'm not mad that she said they were weird.”

But in itself, is the relationship incest ? No. Because not the same blood / DNA and in no way grew up together like Loki was do with Thor / his adoptive family. Autocest / the same literal person ? Neither. For what ? Because again not the same blood / DNA, and they have not the sames experiences, therefore different personalities which influence their behaviour. Being variants, for Sylki, simply mean (once again) being the deity of mischief, a role / identity given to them within the universe / timeline they came from. That's all. (Damn, some will also tell me while we're at it that the crocodile Loki is the same as our Loki ?! Be a little objective people…) There is nothing bad, toxic, perverse, disgusting, immoral or unhealthy about the Sylki relationship.

Fuck the antis !

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