#gives me a story about someone like me

[i-dreamed-i-had-a-son]

Since Stranger Things season 4 is coming out soon I would like to state for the record: Will Byers is aroace and I would really love to see them confirm this

#aroace will byers #stranger things #stranger things season 4 #asexual will byers #aromantic will byers #kay can i just catch my breath for a second #like i know y'all are really into shipping him with mike but we have had stories like that before ya know? #i want to get some representation for me this time is all #obviously hc him however you want it would just mean the world to me if this show (which i would never expect to acknowledge this)... #...gives me a character that i relate to who is confirmed to be like me #gives me a story about someone like me #i just think that would be so meaningful #to me and a whole lot of other people #you don't even have to use the specific words i don't care just have him say 'i don't like people that way. i don't like *anyone* that way' #that would be enough #it's already set up it would be so good you've shown you're not worried about showing queer characters on screen can you do this one for me #aksjdjf #anyways

[treasureplcnet]

btw i love revenge stories i dont think anyone should ever move on peacefully. a bit obsessed with the way weissman went to the synagogue and rabbi and asks, "my choices killed a child. would god take mercy on someone like me?" and the rabbi says "it's not god's mercy you should look for. its the child's" and like you think that would spur this man into charitable activities and to maybe look out for orphans but instead he goes on a 24 hour revenge bender that ultimately ends in two revenge killings and his own death. what's better than righteous anger and wrath and love twisting someone into the worst but also a truer version of themselves <3

#like im not even reaching here. (sort of am. whatever) #rabbi goldstein essentially goes 'think of esther. you need to be a man she would take mercy on. be someone she can forgive' #and it takes all of 10 minutes for karl weissman to decide yeah ok what i need is double homicide #do i think esther would have wanted revenge in her name. dunno. maybe. #she is 11 and very much the victim of this story. maybe she would have wanted karl to just live. kids are cruel and kind in that way #but to be fair this is esther 'fuck with me and you'll hang like a dog' jankovsky #so im willing to believe she was rooting for him #also the immediate choice to make elias suffer by shooting his leg (? maybe arm) before actually killing him #i dont know. the deliberate cruelty right after he visits the synagogue. an act of defiance. giving himself up after its done. it gets me #i love . I LOVE REVENGE :) GREATEST PLOT POINT EVER!!!!!!!! #sorry everyone about the bodies thoughts. i have no idea how long this is going to last #bodies netflix #karl weissman

[lord-squiggletits]

One of my favorite parts of phase 2 (and indeed one of the few moments I resonated with IDW Prowl) was when the neutrals were coming back to Cybertron and Prowl said that he refused to let Autobots be pushed aside and overruled after they were the ones who fought for freedom for 4 million years (the exact wording escapes me atm).

And I mean, that resentment still holds true even once the colonists come on bc like. As much as it's true that Cybertron's culture is fucked up, and as funny as it can be to paint Cybertronians as a bunch of weirdos who consider trying to kill someone as a common greeting not important enough to hold a grudge over.... The colonists POV kind of pissed me off a lot of times, as did the narrative tone/implications that Cybertronians are forever warlike and doomed to die by their own hands bc it just strikes me as an extremely judgemental and unsympathetic way to deal with a huge group of people with massive war PTSD and political/social tensions that were rampant even before the war?

Like, imagine living in a society rife with bigotry and discrimination where you get locked into certain occupations and social strata based on how you were born. The political tension is so bad there's a string of assassinations of politicians and leaders. The whole planet erupts into an outright war that leads (even unintentionally) to famine and chemical/biological warfare that destroys your planet. Both sides of the war are so entrenched in their pre-war sides and resentment for each other that this war lasts 4 million years and you don't even have a home planet any more. Then your home planet gets restored and a bunch of sheltered fucks come home and go "ewww why are you so violent?? You're a bunch of freaks just go live in the wilderness so that our home can belong to The Pure People Who Weren't Stupid And Evil Enough To Be Trapped In War" and then a bunch of colonists from places that know nothing about your history go "lol you people are so weird?? 🤣🤣 I don't get why y'all are fighting can't you just like, stop??? Oh okay you people are just fucked up and evil and stupid then" ((their planets are based on colonialism where their Primes wiped out the native populations btw whereas the Autobots and OP in particular fought to save organics. But that never gets brought up as a point in their favor)) as if the damage of a lifetime of war and a society that was broken even before the war can just magically go away now that the war is over.

Prowl fucking sucks but he was basically the only person that pointed out the injustice of that.

And then from then on out most of the characters from other colonies like Caminus and wherever else are going "i fucking hate you and your conflicts" w/ people like literal-nobody Slide and various Camiens getting to just sit there lecturing Optimus about how Cybertronians are too violent for their own good and how their conflicts are stupid, with only brief sympathetic moments where the Cybertronians get to be recognized as their own ppl who deserve sympathy before going right back to being lambasted.

Like I literally struggled to enjoy the story at multiple points because there was only so much I could take of the characters I knew and loved being raked over coals constantly while barely getting to defend themselves or be defended by the narrative so like. It was just fucking depressing and a little infuriating to read exRID/OP

#squiggposting #and like dont get me wrong barber wasnt trying to make cybertronians the bad guys or whatever #it's just a problem with his writing where like. he has A Message he wants to send #and so he uses the entire story literally just for The Message even if it involves bullshit plotlines #or familiar characters ppl were reading about for the past decade being shit on by OCs made up to fill a new roster #like barber's writing tends to lean way too much on a sort of lecturing tone #without giving proper care towards including moments where characters get to like. fucking express themselves and share their side #sort of like how barber couldnt be bothered to write pyra magna and optimus actually talking to each other during exrid #and instead during OP ongoing pyra is suddenly screaming about how OP is unteachable #even tho she never even tried to teach him bc she and OP never interacted bc i guess barber couldnt be bothered #he just needed someone to lecture OP so fuck making the story make sense or like letting OP get to say anything in defense #this is the infuriating part of barber's writing bc i think he has incredible IDEAS and was in charge of the lore i was most interested in #but most of the time his execution sucks and he's basically just mid with a few brilliant moments occasionally #or like he has a message about the cycle of violence he wants to convey #but his narrative choices trying to convey that theme made his story come off as super unsympathetic to the ppl who suffered #to the point where barber actively kneecapped some scenes that couldve been super fucking intense and emotional #in favor of the characters lecturing each other or some stupid plot to criticize OP #that time in unicron where windblade screamed about how this is their fault and then arcee replied that her planet is build on coloniation #shouldve happened more often than literally the last series of the ocntinuity. like goddamn stfu about your moral superiority #when your own sins are right fhere lol

[gideonisms]

I love arranging it's like YES YES THE OBJECTS ARE IN LOCATIONS

#i do sometimes wish i had a messy apartment and a put together life #anyway i acquired a new favorite object at goodwill yesterday a mug in my favorite color #i was wondering about the previous owner and why they would give up such a nicely shaped mug #was it an older person who passed away or just someone moving? #maybe they're just in a smaller apartment now and they have other mugs they like better #maybe their favorite color isn't sky blue #i wish i knew their whole story #why didn't you like this mug? #i do think about the people who owned my things before me and wish them well sometimes #it's nice to be connected like this #i think that's what i like so much about stories where people explore abandoned places #it's also about knowing other people in a very genuine way #not what they present to the world but how they really lived #idk

[joyflameball]

What yougotta understand is that when you're interacting with blogs from a fictional universe, such as the English Willy saga, ya DON'T GIVE THE GAME AWAY. Don't just TELL THEM all the plot. Don't tell them exactly what's happening!! Don't tell them the important names!! Send asks and such but actually think through, how would a normal person respond to all this? How would a normal Tumblrina respond? The answer is YOU PROBABLY WOULD NOT FIND FUCKING EVERYTHING OUT IMMEDIATELY. The answer would probably be memes and clowning on things! If you wanna allude to things that will happen in the plot, ALLUDE to them. If you know that someone's gonna burn to death, say you hope the stress doesn't cause them to burn out. Please, my Tumblrinas, learn the art of subtlety in writing. You are not the main character in fictional universe blogs. It's okay.

#cassie rambles #english willy #this post was prompted by me getting annoyed ppl in the comments of the english willy posts were just straight-up giving everything away #PEOPLE. LEARN THE ART OF ''WAITING'' AND ''SUBTLETY'' AND ''YOU'RE NOT THE MAIN CHARACTER HERE'' #like just straight up saying ''yeah that probably means elizabeth! that's probably a murderer's corpse in there!'' #girl these reveals take TIME #the reason the "lisbef'' thing and the ice cream thing work is because we know the plot to fnaf! we know what he's talking about! #we don't need it to be said explicitly! that's what show dont tell is! #and it sucks the wind out of the sails if you just say ''oh yeah that's a reference to elizabeth afton'' #it's like if the op brought up fires and someone immediately said ''oh fazbear frights is gonna burn down btw'' #like NO. THAT'S NOT WHAT GOOD WRITING IS. THAT'S NOT HOW YOU DO REFERENCES TO THE SOURCE MATERIAL. #the reason saying like ''aw i hope mike doesnt get cold in there i hope he brought smth to stay warm :('' works is because it isn't blatant #i mean if you know hte plot to fnaf 3 it is but if you don't it doesn't break immersion by just telling us the plot #all of this is said lightheartedly #anyway. #LIKE NO YOU IDIOTS!!!! DON'T JUST BRING OUT CIRCUS BABY BLATANTLY!!!!!!!!!!!! #YOU'RE TRYING TO RUSH THE STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!! LET IT BUILD UP AND THE PAYOFF WILL BE BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #STOP TRYING TO BE THE MAIN CHARACTER!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE A SIDE HARACTER HERE ADN THAT IS OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[herearedragons]

tag the oc that's most likely to get stuck in a time loop and what kind of time loop it would be

#I feel like Kyana has time loop potential but idk what the exact loop would be #maybe the loop is the entirety of DAO and she keeps getting companions killed/locked into their Bad Endings #and the loop only stops when she manages to get them all to survive the Blight #something something she needs to learn to be a good leader and care about others #unsuccessful loops reset via the archdemon killing her (even if the dark ritual was performed) #Selene gets the classic 'your love interest keeps dying and you try to stop it' time loop #to escape the loop she must Let It Happen (and then it turns out it's fine and everyone survives) #Secret gives me the vibe of someone who knows they're in a time loop but has given up on trying to solve it #she's just going through it. trying everything. keeping herself entertained. trying to stay sane #sometimes she clues Varric in on the looping. sometimes she doesn't #actually maybe her time loop rule is that someone else has to save her from it. nothing she does by herself will work #idk what the exact reset point would be #I'm thinking the Arishok fight maybe. or Meredith #I don't think it would go as far as the Fade #also. after writing Homecoming I did have the thought of a time loop story #with Dorian as the one being trapped and trying to prevent Neil from dying/becoming possessed #maybe in his case he's not really trapped. he can stop anytime he wants but he keeps choosing to go back #the reset point is something Solas-related maybe #herearedragons meta #oc: kyana amell #oc: watcher selene #oc: secret hawke #oc: neilar lavellan #oh. actually. Aqun would be pretty fun to put in a time loop #that runs over some part of DAI and/or Trespasser #Adina is his time loop buddy (the person he usually tells about the loop because she immediately believes him) #idk what his reset/escape condition would be though #maybe in his case it's something purely mechanical #like there's no lesson to be learned it's just a magical anomaly he's trapped on #and on a meta level the 'lesson' is accepting that not everything has a Purpose or a Reason

[mildmayfoxe]

FOR CHARMERS TRICKSTERS CONMEN AND CADS: redux of a vintage pin in my collection 🃏 give em a little hint about who they're dealin with 😏😉 shop / patreon

#shop tag #art tag #when i posted my high speed rail button a hundred years ago my original pin was in the photo #and i got people being like 'ok but i'm gonna buy the card one' and i was like noooo that doesn't exist!! that's mine! #i can't find any information about it online except a brief mention of someone sharing a story of giving one to ace frehley in a forum #no pictures at all! though i haven't tried a reverse image yet #the original one is green so i was trying to not do a direct copy. but it was hard bc the original is perfect to me.

[pcktknife]

what do you think about the newest penacony story patch in hsr?

penacony numero uno. actually the best arc out of the 3 so far but sunday should kill himself*

#*i cant beat the boss what else is fuckinggggg new 🚬 #im typing this after my idk 4-6th attempt #the fact that you cant do the world level thing like you can in genshin is ass #bailus healing annoys me and gallagher...is actually pretty good for the fight i was worried taking him in but he does p well #i hate complaining about the difficulty of the game cause the reality is that im just not a stats guy and only vaguely understand how #everything goes. im better at an open world beat the shit outta everything game like genshin but i like sr more </3 #and theres so few imaginary characters. DIE #aventurine and luocha were really good but either didnt care or was saving for someone else and im paying the PRICE #asks #anon #anyways ueah penacony fire story. gallagher and misha u are the world 🫶🏾 #also it just looks really good all the maps are so nice looking #the characters are enjoyable i like how everyone plays a part and i actually cared about the story #star rail spoilers #b4 i got to the part ingame i saw mishas va on twitter give a lil thank you and i was like hes deeefinitely dying lmaoo #it was a nice ending for those 2 though bittersweet. im glad misha did get to experience the astral express even if it wasnt the one we kne #mhy

[moongothic]

You know, I would love it if we could see Mihawk just. Get slightly fucked up by someone, have his sword stolen and watch him figure out how to fight with some random ass sword instead

I just think. It'd be neat.

Like we kinda know how The World's Greatest Swordsman fights with his itty bitty knife, we know what kind of damage he can do with his iconic Yoru

I just think it'd be fun to see him fight with a regular katana and try to get his stolen sword back or summin' IDK

#Moon posting #Cross Guild #Mihawk #OP Spoilers #OP Meta #IDK something something Cross Guild can't pay for Garp's bounty so Blackbeard's crew goes and attacks them #Kidnaps Crocodile and Buggy to steal their abilities and takes Mihawk as captive to see if he'll join BB or not #Steal his sword in the meantime to give to his crew as a toy to play with or something #I don't know there's something about this scenario that facinates me #Also if Luffy and co went to save Garp from Blackbeard I could imagine a scenario where the crew find CG in the prison #And free them. And could you imagine Mihawk asking Zoro to borrow one of his swords while he goes gets his back or summin #I JUST THINK IT'D BE NEAT #This scenario facinates me. I would love to see it #Especially since we didn't really get to see that much of Zoro and Mihawk interacting so like. It'd be cute #Also like GENERALLY SPEAKING I would just love to see Mihawk in a 1v1 duel with someone OTHER THAN ZORO #(Or Shanks) #I dunno I think Mihawk is just Neat but we barely get to see him Do Things so it'd be so fun to see him Do Things #Break Week is hitting hard. It's been So Many Months and we still have no idea where the CG subplot is going #I can only speculate and make 50 different suggestions for where the story could go from here #(I say ''break week is hitting hard'' on the Friday evening after 1101 was released unofficially) #(This week is gonna be rough y'all lmao)

[copepods]

i love suns and pebbles canon dynamic in my head its kind of weird and fucked up and i wish more people depicted it as that (tag ramble incoming)

#i have a lot of thoughts about suns as a character #since theres not much from them in the story its mostly headcanon though #i think suns is someone who desperately wants to be liked and admired #like maybe theyre one of the youngest in their local group (i think theyre in a separate neighboring group to moons) #and they're not really used to being looked up to in any capacity #so pebbles is the first person who really respects them in that way and because of that they have this weird contradictory relationship #where sometimes suns relishes in that dynamic a little too much and holds the power over pebbles head and gets a little mean #and sometimes because suns still wants pebbles to keep liking and admiring them they can get a little too indulgent of him #hence the gold pearl. i think suns gave it to him bc they wanted him to find some kind of happiness but there was also a selfish element #'if i give this to him he'll like me more' etc #i dont think suns is intentionally cruel i just think they had never had that kind of relationship before and fucked a lot of things up #after spearmaster they start to get better at it esp since spearmaster is kind of a second chance for them. so suns learns to be kinder #on pebbles' end. i like to think pebbles was a lil infatuated with them. esp because he felt like they were the only one who understood him #unreciprocated tho. suns cared about him but more from a mentorly point of view than anything #kind of a weird thing where he looked up to them as an authority figure but also really kind of wanted them to be on the same level #in conclusion: toxic robot yuri can be cool sometimes #text #rain world

[alagaesia-headcanons]

I've been turning over in my mind the scene where Nasuada yells at Murtagh to fight against Galbatorix, the way she sees him and how she confronts him. It reveals this fundamental misunderstanding of who he is. And I just think it's so sad. For Murtagh, the people he loves are what matter most to him, and in the case of Nasuada and Eragon specifically, he cares so very much about them that he consistently does everything in his power to help them. And they in return put such pitifully little effort into understanding him and caring about him. It's not that they've proven incapable, it's that, to them, Murtagh isn't worth even the effort of trying. It's so fucking sad.

#eragon #inheritance cycle #murtagh #nasuada #eragon shadeslayer #recently been thinking about characters' inclinations to prioritize the needs of individuals vs the needs of a cause #as defining their behaviors and outlooks #and the ways those inclinations have benefits and the ways they cause harm #blah blah whatevr maybe remind me to elaborate on that later #anyway eragon and nasuada owe murtagh a serious fucking apology #a significant driving force for the post canon stories im writing is to give murtagh people who actually care about him #for him to be recognized and cared for as a person like he deserves #he deserves to matter to someone -not begrudgingly -not conditionally -genuinely and whole heartedly #ya know. just read my fic #im clearly just in my murtagh feels tonight

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

I hope MC knows how iconic she is in this event for being like "No I want him to be a little bit fucked up actually" in Comte's story because GIRL SAME. S A M E

#ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp comte #ikevamp saint germain #ikevamp mc #the way i deadass resurrect every time comte walks into the room #laughing crying yelling #i just can't stop wheezing at the latest collection story #im here like yes. YES GIVE ME THE MANS OF MY DREAMS #and the game is like 'literally why are you like this. actual freak.' #comte i SWEAR to god #'are you looking for someone more...StImUlAtInG' #oh fk this im gonna jump him #every single event story im like 'that come hither look won't work on me. i'm stronger than this. endure.' #comte: **come hither look** #me: FUCK #literally what is it about this man that just makes me invariably act up #im so like 'MAKES NO DAMN S E N S E. compels me tho.' #ive had a sudden insurgency of spoons because of hozier's NFWMB #literally can't unsee the association now #hozier walked so that comte could run no i wont take constructive criticism #dont even get me started on his 6th year anniversary stories because literally this man #THIS M A N #wildly oscillates between 'actually????? the most adorable romantic?????' #and 'If My Wife Doesn't Want Me Carnally Every Five Hours I'm Going To Scream' #and apparently that's my type (so sorry everyone im the bearer of the curse)

[puppyeared]

Atla live action 😐

#thats my honest reaction 😐 #to be fair ive only seen 20 minutes of the s1 finale bc my parents are watching it but. mmmmm kinda mid #like. the casting is definitely an improvement since the last time they tried a live action but it feels like the writing falls flat #or maybe im being harsh bc ive only heard negative criticism on it beforehand. but fr anytime u bring up the original its already #good and not just because its the original. so much fucking detail went into it to the point of someone noticing azula wielding mai's knive #to how well thought out irohs character is used as a way of uniting the cast especially as zukos foil #i heard that sokkas sexism was toned down and i have to agree that feels like a cheap move. like i get WHY they think it would be better #but its not about how that reflects on real world its about how it affects the story. sokka starts out as a misogynistic asshole because #it makes it that much more impactful when he changes. toning that down makes it flatter and makes his character development weak #and someone pointed out they didnt even make him wear the kyoshi warrior uniform and i know it feels like such a small detail but #come on man. they did that in the original because not only does it help him really walk in their shoes - wearing 'feminine' clothing and #makeup and having suki explain its significance but it also ties in with the shows theme of harmony and intersectionality #i was also disappointed when they had the fire sages explain how the water tribe draws power from the moon because in the original it was #IROH who explained it to aang and everyone else BECAUSE we as the audience is under the impression hes with the 'bad guys' #and it builds up to how he learned from the other nations which reconciles his past as a war general and his character overall #AND its an excellent starting point for the cast and audience to understand how the nations arent as closed off as you would think #plus you would think its only fire nation doing propaganda but they expanded on that with earth kingdom censorship and it WORKS #a lot of things in the live action also feel arbitrary like. they gave momo a near death experience for 5 minutes for no reason #im firmly on the stance of bringing back filler moments instead of putting major events right after each other so that u give your #audience a sense of time passing and to really absorb the story. but i think thats more like shock value than filler and yeah its a small #thing to gripe about but those things build up and its really annoying. the thing abt avatar filler moments is that however small #its at least meaningful. hell even the beach episode emphasizes how isolated zuko and his friends are as child soldiers #i also swore to never watch the first live action since it was that bad but i really liked the stylized tattoos they used for aang #anyway. those arejust my thoughts. im not gonna watch the rest because im a ride or die for the original aftr growing up and #rewatching it at least 20 times as a kid. but theres definitely room for improvement and i wish ppl wouldnt take it as 'better' just cuz #netflix is adapting it. i wouldve killed for them to just reanimate the entire avatar series and touch NOTHING ELSE no redub #no changes to the story. just reanimate the thing and leave the rest alone and youd make easy money just the same #ALSO its very jarring not hearing jack desena and dante basco voicing sokka and zuko cause their voices were the most recognizable to me #i get that its because its live action but im allowed to feel a little sad abt that. and uncle irohs accent was really soothing #yapping

[skylarbee]

milex and 'white nights' by dostoevsky

if you love milex do not, for the love of god and the well-being of your mental health, read 'white nights' - i am crushed and utterly inconsolable, and the fact that this whole story fits so well with the lyrics of 'killing the joke' and 'the meeting place' and the la cigale performance has me wanting to cry until tomorrow, and i can't keep all these thoughts to myself.

for those that don't know, it is the story of a man who meets a girl and falls in love with her; unfortunately, the girl is in love with someone else and is waiting for him to come back to her; and in the end, she returns to her lover, but wants to remain friends with our nameless character.

the two characters meet during the night, always in the same place - 'but I want to see you tonight'

the man can't sleep, he is too excited about their next night when they'll meet again; he even goes back to their meeting place on his own: - 'he struggles to sleep at night and during the day/he's worried she's waiting in his dreams/to drag him back to the meeting place/his love had left him there' - 'he's crying out from the meeting place/he's stranded himself there'

things taking a wrong turn is indicated by grey and gloomy weather, rain and dark clouds - 'cause the clocks count down and we're in for bad weather'

the man confesses his love to the girl, despite knowing that she can't love him, knowing that what he is going to say "is all nonsense, all impossible, all stupid! I know that this can never be, but I cannot be silent" - 'why do I always have to go killing the joke?'

the man has been lonely all his life and has been unsuccessful with women, but despite his loneliness and despair, he manages to make the girl laugh multiple times - 'but I, I live a lonely life / but I, I know I'm a funny guy'

at the end, she writes him a letter, asking him to forgive her for leaving him - 'her voice still echoes/ I'm sorry I met you, darling, I'm sorry I've left you'

nastenka's lover has been away for a year, but before he went, he promised her that when he comes back, he'll marry her. but when he does comes back, he doesn't go to her and the girl begins to doubt his love for her - this is when how our character finds her. in her misery, she wants our narrator to come live with her and tells him that she will love him; but after discussing their plans, her lover turns up - and tell me that this does not remind you of la cigale:

"Come along! Look at the sky, Nastenka. Look! To-morrow it will be a lovely day; what a blue sky, what a moon! Look; that yellow cloud is covering it now, look, look! No, it has passed by. Look, look!"

But Nastenka did not look at the cloud; she stood mute as though turned to stone; a minute later she huddled timidly close up to me. Her hand trembled in my hand; I looked at her. She pressed still more closely to me.

At that moment a young man passed by us. He suddenly stopped, looked at us intently, and then again took a few steps on. My heart began throbbing.

"Who is it, Nastenka?" I said in an undertone.

"It's he," she answered in a whisper, huddling up to me, still more closely, still more tremulously.... I could hardly stand on my feet.

"Nastenka, Nastenka! It's you!" I heard a voice behind us and at the same moment the young man took several steps towards us.

My God, how she cried out! How she started! How she tore herself out of my arms and rushed to meet him! I stood and looked at them, utterly crushed. But she had hardly given him her hand, had hardly flung herself into his arms, when she turned to me again, was beside me again in a flash, and before I knew where I was she threw both arms round my neck and gave me a warm, tender kiss. Then, without saying a word to me, she rushed back to him again, took his hand, and drew him after her.

I stood a long time looking after them. At last the two vanished from my sight."

and despite all this, the man is not angry with her; the last thing he'd do is hurt her in any way; he wishes her to be happy - and realises, that all his life, he's only been truly happy during these nights with her:

"my god, a whole moment of happiness! is that too little for the whole of a man's life?"

which hits even harder if we read the epigraph of the story:

"Or was his destiny from the start

To be but just one moment

Near your heart?" (Ivan Turgenev)

#i am so unwell #i really bought a book with like 20 stories from dostoevsky but randomly decided to read this one for no good reason #i didn't even know what it was about #and the fact that i can relate to this because very similar things happened to me too is making things even worse #maybe the reason why i feel this close connection with miles is because we go through the same shit #like i can't make this up #we both love our best friend of the same sex who gives us false hope then fucks off with someone who has the same #name as one of our parent #what are the chances #and i'm not even gonna mention all our other similarities bcs no one gaf and it's not even the point #miles kane #alex turner #milex #tlsp #the last shadow puppets #fyodor dostoevsky #white nights #the meeting place #killing the joke #la cigale #milex and

[miraluking-respectfully]

felix being referred to more or less exclusively as "your soldier" in-game speaks to how little the writers put into his character beyond his noggin full of sith secrets & his relationship with the consular; still, i do find it kind of sweet and funny, in a way. he's not a republic soldier, not even your personal bodyguard; he's your soldier. the consular is a small nation-state in and of herself

#accurate. #felix iresso #swtor #jedi consular #open tags for My Rant: #going back through rishi and doing the cute little holocron quest got me brooding - as i often do - on my best boy felix #that the writers could not think to give him anything in KOTXX that wasn't Torture Angst is deeply shitty but a little understandable. #all the other consular comps kind of have a way forward that isn't consular-related when the consular goes away #nadia has the jedi. zenith has balmorra. tharan has his old illustrious career. qyzen has little baby clan and also his religious directive #meanwhile felix isn't involved with your order or a supergenius or a politician or even someone with a lifelong goal #he was a guy doing his best at a dead-end job that turned into a far more enjoyable but still lowkey dead-end job #i would argue they could (should) have sent him to ossus but i can see them balking because Doc was already there #that's a little narratively redundant especially bc Doc has an extremely useful set of non-martial skills you would want to center #when telling a story about survival and persistence against the odds like with ossus #(also he was in the group of companions second-closest in proximity to the emperor in base game) #HOWEVER. #because i am immensely sexy and cool and have a huge brain i think i've cracked it #the way to give felix a compelling story post-consular is to put him the fuck in charge. #no longer your soldier or anyone's. his own. maybe even in charge of a large group of people in need of someone to follow #considering he used to be really good at that #a group like...idk...maybe the rest of the people incarcerated on his prison colony? #much to think about.

[thickenmyblood]

I don't know how to thank you. This feels like the end of an era. I can't believe it's been 4yrs since you started posting hiuh and I was instantly hooked. It literally got me through the pandemic. I learned so much from the story and felt I had Neo as a therapist(the best in the world). You must be flooded with asks now but I am really curious how the story formed in your head. It's hard to believe how consistent the story is as you posted chapter by chapter. Did you outline the whole story when you started? did you stick to all the original ideas? if you changed your mind what were they? It really is a master piece - much much better than many published books I read and I hope you will publish someday, if that's what you want.

I'd also offer you my first born to have an epilogue. hopefully lamen with their child(ren) playing on the beach and Nicaise being the doting big brother. they all grew so much and deserve all the happiness. oh and Kastor and Jo and Galen for big family gathering. I'm so proud of all of them.

thank you thank you thank you for all your patience and genius and mostly, generosity.

hello!!!! i'm so happy that my story resonated with you and got you through some tough times. it did the same for me!

It's hard to believe how consistent the story is as you posted chapter by chapter.

thank you!! it will never be as good as it was in my head or as good as I know I could have made it if I had spent more time on it, but for me the most important thing is that it is completed and at least 70% of what I wanted it to be. a win is a win!!!

Did you outline the whole story when you started? did you stick to all the original ideas? if you changed your mind what were they?

i got the idea for a modern au break up fic in 2020 while I was writing and posting wtsioa. i started the story as a 20k one shot and then realized 5k into it or less that it was not going to fit into that word count. the reason was very simple: i did not want a break up fic centered around "miscommunication" in a naive, fluffy way. i did not want to write a fic where the main issue was that one loved the other too much or that they thought the other was cheating when it wasn't true, etc. i wanted to write a break up that felt honest to me, and this meant giving them both issues that felt real, that i saw in myself and in the people around me irl. which meant that it would take them both considerably more than 5k to get over them (if they ever did).

i outlined the fic very roughly. my first drafts . . . they are not it, girl. like, anyone that has read wtsioa knows that. I'm a much better editor than I am a writer, so for hiuh i outlined the main beats (nicaise calls damen after months, damen goes to therapy, nicaise is out of control and some incidents happen, laurent is dating maxime, they get back together). then, i wrote the entire thing in . . . a year? maybe less? then, i made a mistake and got cocky: i edited the first three chapters and started posting on ao3. that's why the fic took so long to post. i had to edit each chapter a lot after the first three were released.

i edited out too many things to count. things you wouldn't believe if I told you now because they make no sense when looking at the finished version. idalia was a pretty big character, and so was jokaste. in the og outline, I debated between claude/heavy drugs for nicaise. i almost named dog NIKANDROS!!!! damen actually punched aktis at the party when he talks shit about laurent . . . which led to him also punching nik. laurent slapping nicaise once. aimeric and damen baking together. then, there were things I wanted to write but couldn't because they didn't feel very real to me, despite being the best self indulgent daydream scenarios ever: damen hunting claude down (yeah, ruth wanted this to happen), dog getting sick, aimeric's EVERYTHING lol, nik and nicaise talking, etc.

thank you for sending this ask and reading the story through all the ups and downs and... lack of updates on my end!!! it has been the best experience ever, knowing that someone out there is reading and cares about what I made. thank you!!!!!!!!

#anon #hiuh #about the epilogue: i feel you #someone asked me what lamen telling nicaise would look like #but I WANNA KNOW WHAT THE PEOPLE WANT OKAY #bc i already know what happens inside my head #some people were pissed about the cut off ending but i think it just gives the story such a hopeful note