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chaos0pikachu · 5 months

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Is BL Being Overly Influenced by Modern Western Romance Tropes?

Short answer: No. anyways, in the following essay I will explain that James Cameron is a weeb...

(okay fine~~ lets actually do this)

TLDR: discussing what media globalization is, how fandom can distill it down to only American/European cinema, showcasing how a lot of current BL is influenced by countries within it's own proximity and NOT "the west" but each other, also James Cameron is still a weeb

I had seen a post that basically proposited that BL was being influenced by modern western romance tropes and had used things like omegaverse and mafia settings as an example. I found this, in a word, fucking annoying (oh, two words I guess) because it's micro-xenophobic to me.

It positions western - and really what we mean by this is American/European countries, we're not talking about South American countries are we? - cinema as the central breadbasket of all cinema in and of itself. Inherently, all following cinema must be in some way, shape, or form, influenced by American/European standards, and as such America/European countries are directly responsible for cinema everywhere else, and these places - namely non-white countries - do not influence each other, nor have their own histories in regards to storytelling or cinema and do not, in turn, also influence American/European film making either.

Now like, do I think all of that~~ is intentionally malicious thinking on behalf of folks in fandom? No, so chill out.

I do, however, think a lot of it is birthed from simple ignorance and growing up in an environment where ~The West~ is propagated to be central, individual, and exceptional as opposed to the monolith of "Asia" - by which we mean China, Korea, Japan don't we? How often in discussions of Asian countries is Iran, India, or Saudi Arabia brought up even tho they are all Asian countries? - or the monolith that is South America - in which some folks might believe regions like the Caribbean and/or Central America belong to, but nope there both North America.

Anyway, what we're talking about here is the concept of "media globalization":

"The production, distribution, and consumption of media products on a global scale, facilitating the exchange and diffusion of ideas cross-culturally." (source)

"The media industry is, in many ways, perfect for globalization, or the spread of global trade without regard for traditional political borders. [...] the low marginal costs of media mean that reaching a wider market creates much larger profit margins for media companies. [...] Media is largely a cultural product, and the transfer of such a product is likely to have an influence on the recipient’s culture." (source)

Typically when I see fandom discussing what falls under MG the topic is usually focused on how "the west" is influencing Thai/Korean/Chinese/Japanese media.

Enter, Pit Babe.

Surely Pit Babe was influenced by Supernatural right? Omegaverse is huge in the west - love it, hate it, meh it - it originated in the west - specifically via Supernatural after all.

Nah.

Omegaverse has been popular in Japan and China for almost a decade, if not longer. The earliest omegaverse manga I can think of is Pendulum: Juujin Omegaverse by Hana Hasumi which was released in 2015, almost a decade ago.

(what if you added furries into omegaverse? WHAT IF?? - Japan)

There's countless popular omegaverse manga too, and the dynamics only moderately resemble the ones we're familiar with in the west. Juujin is part omegaverse and part furry/beastmen - the alphas are all beastmen the omegas are humans - while something like Ookami-kun Is Not Scary only slightly resembles omegaverse dynamics as a hybrid series - beastmen are really popular in Japan in part b/c of historical mythology (you see the combination of romantic Beastmen and Japanese culture & folklore in Mamoru Hosoda's work The Boy and the Beast and Wolf Children).

Megumi & Tsugumi (2018) is so popular they're an official English edition published by VIZ's imprint SuBlime and that's a straight up omegaverse story.

(look at the omega symbol on the cover loud and proud baby)

So if Pit Babe was influenced by anything, it certainly wasn't "the west" it was Japan, Korea and China. Because those countries have a thriving omegaverse sub-genre going and have had such for 10 plus years now. Supernatural is popular in Japan, yes, and that may be where Japan and Japanese fans originally found omegaverse as a fictional sub-genre.

HOWEVER

Japanese fans took the sub-genre, bent it, played with it, and evolved it into their own thing. As such, other countries in their proximity, like Thailand, China, and Korea who read BL and GL manga, found it and were like "hey, we wanna play too!"

(is that an omegaverse yuri novel I spy?? yes, yes it is)

When I watched the Red Peafowl trailer, it had more in common with Kinnporsche, History: Trapped, along with films and shows like: Jet Li's The Enforcer, and Fist of Legend, Donnie Yen's Flash Point, Raging Fire, and Kung Fu Jungle, Han Dong-wook's The Worst of Evil, Kim Jin-Min's My Name, Lee Chung-hyeon's The Ballerina, Baik's Believer & Believer 2, Yoshie Kaoruhara's KeixYaku, popular Don Lee films The Gangster, the Cop and the Devil and Unstoppable alongside BL manga like Honto Yajuu and Bi No Isu (probably one of the most well known yazuka manga to date).

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Like, we're seeing a rise in mafia based BLs and people think that's because of "western influence" and not the absolute insane success of kinnporsche??? Especially in countries like China, Korea, Taiwan, Philippines and other Asian countries???

Mafia films and gang shows aren't even that popular here in America/Europe; don't get me wrong, they still get made and exist, but the last full length film was The Irishman which did not make it's budget back, and while Power is still on-going it's not a smash hit either. The heyday of Breaking Bad, The Sopranos, The Wire, Goodfellas, and Scarface are long gone. And if you've watched any those shows or films they have very little in common with Kei x Yaku, Kinnporsche, or Red Peafowl in tone, or style.

(who knew martin just wanted to make his al pacino/robert de niro fanfic come to life all these years?)

Another example, The Sign, which is clearly taking inspiration from Chinese costume dramas: Ashes of Love, Fairy and Devil, White Snake (and it's many adaptions), Guardian, & Ying Yang Master Dream of Eternity. Alongside Hong Kong and Korean cop and romance shows like Tale of the Nine-Tailed, Hotel Del Luna, Director Who Buys Me Dinner, First Love, Again, and previously mentioned cop dramas.

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Like, I know y'all don't think Twins is influenced by, what, American sports classic Angels in the Outfield?? Gridiron Gang?? Rocky?? Nah that shit is inspired by the popularity of sports manga like Haikyuu!!, Slam Dunk, Prince of Tennis (which even has a Chinese drama adaption), and the like. And also probably History 2, & Not Me but I'm like 87% sure Twins is just Haikyuu fanfic.

So like, does this mean that there's NO history in which American and European cinema influenced these countries? What, no, obviously that's not true, American/European totally have had media influence on countries like Korea, Japan, etc.

Astro Boy by Osamu Tezuka considered "the father of manga" was inspired by Walt Disney's work on Bambi. Another more recent and prominent example is director Yeon Sang-ho and his film Train to Busan.

"And it was Snyder’s movie [Dawn of the Dead, 2004], not the 1978 original, that filmmaker Yeon Sang-ho recalled as his first encounter with the undead. “That was when I started my interest in zombies,” Yeon said, in an email interview through a translator from South Korea. Even today, he added, “it’s the most memorable and intense zombie movie I’ve ever seen.”" (source)

HOWEVER, the global influence doesn't stop there. It's not a one-way street. Yeon Sang-Ho was inspired by Zack Synder's Dawn of the Dead, a remake of George Romero's own work, but Yeon Sang-Ho's work has inspired countless Korean film makers to make their own zombie media; following Train to Busan there's been: Kingdom (2019 - current), All of Us Are Dead (2022), Zombie Detective (2020), Zombieverse (2023), Alive (2020), Rampant (2018).

And hey, wouldn't you know it now we're starting to see more zombie media coming out of places like Japan (Zom 100 the manga, movie, and anime) and High School of the Dead.

Do you know what Domundi's series Zombivor (2023, pilot trailer only) reminds me of? It's NOT The Walking Dead (which is the only relevant zombie media America has created in the last decade) it's Korea's All of Us Are Dead (2022). Comparing the trailers, the settings, the tone, it's clear where Zombivor is pulling inspiration from: Korean zombie cinema. NOT American zombie cinema.

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In fact a lot of Domundi's shows - Cutie Pie, Middleman's Love, Naughty Babe, Bed Friend - are all very clearly inspired by Korean filmmaking, specifically that of romantic kdramas from the 2016 - 2020 era. Not always in story, but rather in technique.

This is media globalization. It's not simply ~The West~ influencing non-American/European countries but countries who are often more close in terms of: proximity, culture, and trade are going to have more influence on each other.

It is far more likely that Aoftion (Naughty Babe, Cutie Pie, Zombivor) was influenced by watching Train to Busan, All of Us Are Dead, and other Korean zombie shows and films than a single episode of Walking Dead.

My point isn't that this goes one way only, but rather it is very literally a global thing. This includes American and European film makers being influenced by non-American and European cinema.

Martin Scorsese, Steven Spielberg, Darren Aronofsky, Christopher Nolan, the Wachowski sisters, George Lucas and James Cameron have all been influenced by Japanese film making, especially the works of Akira Kurosawa, Satoshi Kon, and Mamoru Oshii.

John Wick's entire gun-fu sub-genre is heavily influenced by classic Hong Kong action films, specifically John Woo films. Legend of Korra, The Boondocks, Voltron, Young Justice, My Adventures with Superman are all obviously inspired by Japanese anime but animated by a Korean animation studio (Studio Mir). Beyond that, the rise in adult animated dramas like Castlevania, Critical Role Vox Machina, and Invincible to name a few are very clearly taking inspiration from anime in terms of style. The weebs that were watching Adult Swim's Inuyasha, Bleach, and Dragon Ball Z have grown up and are now working in Hollywood.

Okay so like, what's the point of all this? What's the issue? Since American/European cinema does influence et all cinema does any of this really matter?

YES.

I take contention with this line of thinking because it centers "the west" and our supposed individual importance way to much. Declaring definitively that "BL is being influenced by western tropes" and then including tropes, narratives, and film making styles that aren't inherently western and actually have major roots in the cinema of various Asian countries, removes the existence of individual history these countries have which are rich, varied, and nuanced. It removes the "global" part of globalization by declaring "the globe" is really just America and Europe.

It distills these countries down to static places that only exist when American/European audiences discover them.

BL doesn't exist in a vacuum you can trace the development of Korean BL to the development of Korean het dramas almost to a T. You can also trace their development to the queer history of each country and how Thailand interacts culturally with China, Japan, Korea, etc and vice versa. It also ignores the history of these countries influencing American cinema as well. Don't mistake "the globe" for only your sphere of experience.

Anyway James Cameron is a damn weeb y'all have a good night.

Check out other posts in the series:

Film Making? In My BL? - The Sign ep01 Edition | Aspect Ratio in Love for Love's Sake | Cinematography in My BL - Our Skyy2 vs kinnporsche, 2gether vs semantic error, 1000 Stars vs The Sign | How The Sign Uses CGI | Is BL Being Overly Influenced by Modern Western Romance Tropes?

[like these posts? drop me a couple pennies on ko-fi]

#kinnporsche #pit babe the series #the sign the series #twins the series #red peafowl the series #domundi #gmmtv #chaos pikachu speaks #fucking a this was an entire essay #i should drop a ko-fi link cause good god damn #chaos pikachu metas #Youtube #pikachu's bl film series

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serenityinstone · 2 months

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Feline Fiasco

Hetalia x Reader

This is written for a female reader but there isn't really anything specific that would suggest that besides a few references. If you want to read, I'm not going to stop you.

Also (Y/n) is completely uninterested in the countries for the majority of this, all she's interested in is the cats. This is way fluffier than anything else I've posted, which is two things, and this part is relatively America-centric because (Y/n) works for him. This is also way less quality work than those two posts but idk deal with it?

There is more to this but it's unfinished and I'll probably never post it. My friend also helped with the cat names so if you don't like them... uh assume that they chose them. One last note, I thought it would be funny to write the accents so you also have to deal with that.

As one of the many secretaries working in the White House, it was actually quite a surprise to you that you ended up as the main secretary to the human personification of the U.S.A.

Because of this, you had become quite close to Mr. F. Jones and more importantly: his cat.

You couldn't help but coo at the adorable and floofy feline. Sure, you should probably finish filing those papers, but national security can wait a few more minutes. Besides you couldn't resist the allure of the purr. It would be an understatement to say, when you learned that the other personifications also had furry friends of their own, you were excited.

America didn't want you interacting with the other countries, especially not Russia. But you honestly didn't care and you weren't the recording secretary for those meetings, so it's not like you were in attendance anyways. That somehow didn't stop you from having to tag along and meeting more nation cats; of which you weren't sure why they had brought them along in the first place. It's not like you were complaining.

Ball of fur after ball of fur. No cat went un-petted. Except for Germany's cat; he had evaded you time and time again. But no longer! For today was the last day and you were going to pet that cat if it was the last thing you did.

There it was. It's sleek black fur, the ribbon in Germany's signature colors around its neck, and that always alert look on its face. He would evade you no more. You crouched down in your very inflexible pencil skirt and prepared to pounce.

"Vhat are jou doing?" A voice thick with a German accent called out, startling you and the cat who decided to bound back towards him and into his arms.

"Uhhhh." You blanked.

"You're America's secretary right? Vat vere jou trying to do to my cat?" He questioned, eyes narrowing with suspicion.

You gulped and tried to explain your actions in a way that didn't sound absolutely ridiculous.

"I-uh. I wanted to pet your cat and… he kept evading me and I thought if I snuck up on him that I could pet him." You looked away and pitifully whispered, "Sorry."

"If jou vanted to pet him, all you had to do was ask."

"Really!?" Your eyes lit up and you looked up at the German with pure and unbridled excitement. He coughed and looked away with a slight blush resting on his cheeks.

"Of course." He held the cat out. You, with no hesitation whatsoever, immediately started to adore and love the cat, even shifting it from Germany's arms to your own.

As you continued to pet the cat, who despite his earlier refusal, seemed quite happy, you asked Germany a question. "My name's (Y/n). What's yours if you're willing to share? No pressure though."

His eyes widened a bit before he shook it off and gave you an answer. "Ludwig Beilschmidt." He responded, studying his cat. "Germouser seems to like jou."

You could barely stifle a laugh at the name he had given to the black cat. He sensed your amusement and gave an explanation.

"Feli- Italy named him. I vas going to name him Johann or something similar. Italy was zoroughly horrified by my suggestions and vould not rest until I vent vith his."

You smiled at the Italian's antics and shook your head with amusement. "Germouser is a fine name for an absolutely wonderful cat."

Germany seemed to get flustered again as he watched you coo at his cat, completely ignoring his presence. He would have just left him with you, but the meeting was starting soon and he didn't want to be late. Luckily for him, America decided to pop around the corner, demanding your attention. So you were forced to give up the precious kitty cat and return with Mr. Jones.

Alfred was annoyed. Not at you but at everyone else. Why did they have any right to be around you? You were an American citizen. His citizen. Sure, all you were really interested in was their cats. But what if you thought that they and their cats were so cool that you left him and went to live in a different country instead? He couldn't let that happen.

"So, (Y/n), dude, broette." He said on the way to the meeting room. "Here's the deal."

You gave him a look and raised an eyebrow.

"I need someone to watch Hero for me and my sitter flaked so you're gonna be watching him." He fingered-gunned at you and stars seemed to shine in the air around him. This, of course, was nothing new to you. It wasn’t like you would have rather been attending the meeting anyways.

So you stayed in a different unoccupied meeting room with a lovely, furry friend. It wasn't until he started hissing at a corner that you were in trouble.

"Hero, what's wrong?" You asked, concerned at the agitated cat. His tail bristled up and his ears flattened down as he took a defensive position. Out of nowhere another fluffy cat waltzed in from the very corner that Hero had been hissing at. It was Boris, a cat that belonged to Russia.

You hadn't actually gotten to pet him yet because to be honest, you were also scared of Russia. But… He wasn't around… and his cat was. And his cat was purring.

That was about all the reasoning that you needed to brush past Hero and scoop Boris up into your arms. The former started yowling for your attention and followed you as you went to sit down with the Russian cat.

You laid down on the plush carpeted floor and lifted the cat that you were holding up above you. Boris’ fluffy body was placed onto your chest and he immediately started purring louder once he got comfortable. He nuzzled his face into your neck, much to the annoyance of the American cat. Hero yowled at you and pawed at Boris, desperately trying to get him off.

Boris only gave him a smug look in return and kneaded into you, further solidifying his spot. Hero decided that it wasn’t worth the fight and that he was going to get his owner to remove the Russian cat and put him back into his mother’s lap: aka you.

The surprisingly smart and agile cat leapt around the room and pushed down the door handle, slipping out through the crack. You didn’t notice this as you were currently immersed in the bliss of a cat sitting on you and letting you pet it.

Eventually the purring lulled you into a peaceful and warm slumber, the two of you deciding to take a cat nap.

It would be Russia who found you first. Ivan realized that his cat had gone missing and he honestly didn’t care enough about the meeting to stay. It's not like anyone would try to stop him.

So as Hero bounded down the halls towards the meeting room, Mr. Ivan Braginsky came from the other direction; his sense of where his cat was at any one moment was completely uncanny.

The Russian gradually opened the wooden door and it quietly opened without any resistance. He turned his head towards where he heard purring and was met with a surprising sight. It was America’s secretary, with his cat, lying, with his cat.

You were breathing softly and the movements of your chest moving up and down also moved Boris. Ivan couldn’t help but faintly smile at the sight. Said cat opened a singular eye to acknowledge the new presence in the room. He flicked his tail and settled back into his spot. Not wanting to bother you or the cat, Ivan pulled out a chair and sat down.

He pulled out some paperwork, seemingly from nowhere, and began to work on it. The sounds of your quiet breathing, combined with the light purr from Boris, made for a calming work environment.

As the three of you remained in peaceful bliss, another kitty cat was running around the corner on the never ending search for food. Itabby trotted up and down the corridors looking for an open door that might lead to some food that didn’t come from England. Her golden fur glimmered as the sun shined through the many windows in the building. She looked over at a door that had opened slightly and was too blinded by the thought of food to notice the scarily familiar scent coming from the room.

Itabby scampered over to the door but screeched and meowed as she was sent flying by an American blonde and his equally irritated cat. She tentatively peered around the door at the scene forming.

“HEY!” Alfred yelled, startling both you and the cat. You shot up straight, Boris falling into your lap. “What are you doing with her?!” He yelled again, getting his face up into Ivan’s. The other man gave him an unamused look and stood up, towering over him. Alfred, despite this, did not back down and continued to stare angrily at him.

“Go away.” The white-haired male said, his accent heavy as he crossed his arms. “You have startled them with your unnecessary noise. You are just like the rest of your country.”

The air tensed and became heavier as the seconds went on. They began to size each other up as Hero, ironically, “heroically” walked proudly over to you and with his front paws, pushed Boris off of your lap. He quickly took his place and started purring. Boris’ fur began to puff up as he hunched down and prepared to pounce. His back legs flexed and he made the jump, sending both him and Hero flying towards their fighting owners, who were remarkably somehow not in a physical fight. Yet.

You very quickly realized that you did not want to be in the middle of two superpowers fighting and quietly took your leave. (E/c) eyes met feline amber ones and you swept up the cat and made your escape, leaving behind the feuding men and cats.

Itabby snuggled into your arms as you finally slowed down to catch your breath. Her round tail whooshed back and forth as you tiredly walked through the long hallway. The two of you eventually ended up in the rose gardens of the meeting building. The area was well taken care of and beautiful if you did say so yourself. The meeting was taking place in England and Mr. Jones had told you about how the Brit enjoyed gardening, so it made sense as to why it was here.

Speaking of the British, you spotted a fluffy feline shape from the corner of your eye. It was deeper into the gardens and among the trees. Itabby finally decided that it was time to go and return to her owner. She gracefully leaped out of your arms and landed on all fours and trotted off to beg Italy for some pasta. You instead continued your approach to the cat, which at this point, you could tell was a Scottish Fold.

The left side of his face was brown and so was his tail. Alike to his owner, he seemed to have what you assumed were some kind of eyebrows and when he opened his eyes to look at you, his olive eyes stared into yours. He flicked his tail and layed back down onto the wall that he was laying on. His collar jingled as he moved and you quietly moved up to him. On the gold circle attached to the same olive color collar, was a name.

‘Scone’ You thought. ‘Oh my god. This is the most English cat name I have ever seen.’

You almost started laughing but the smoldering glare the cat gave you made you think otherwise. The stone wall was surprisingly cold for the summer sun and as you sat down, you took a look at Scone. He seemed to still be quite grumpy, but he knew you from earlier in the week, so he was not alarmed. You lifted up and moved your left arm forward to start petting him.

Scone was soft and clearly well-taken care of. His fur was clean and had no knots or dirt insight, despite laying around a garden for half a day. You continued your actions and the both of you started to fall back into slumber. Your hand hovered on the back of the feline and your head slumped alongside your body.

It was peaceful. With birds chirping and the wind lightly blowing. There was a river babbling somewhere in the background and it made for a serene scene. The only reason he had let you pet him was because you had fed him earlier in the week. He didn’t have his collar at that point so this was the first time you had gotten his name. Your eyes closed as you recalled the event from a couple of days prior.

The day after the plane landed you were on the hunt for felines. Armed with some cat food, a retractable mouse-on-a-stick and hope, you made your way around the building England had set aside for housing the rampant countries, and byproduct, their cats. France’s cat, Monsieur, was an absolute attention wh-. He really liked attention, and would rub himself against your leg anytime the two of you crossed paths. It’s not like France, or Francis, was much better.

It’s not like you minded petting him. He was adorable after all. The cat, not Francis. But you had wanted to meet as many other cats as you could and so you had to stop by Francis’ room multiple times to drop off Monsieur.

“Je suis désolé.” He said, taking Monsieur out of your arms. “He keeps getting out. But I guess he knows when there’s a lovely lady around.”

You ignored his attempts at flirting and instead scratched Monsieur’s chin one last time before leaving. He purred at you and while you felt bad about leaving him, you were on a mission! Besides, you had a certain Japanese cat to track down. Monsieur meowed at you as you walked down the hallway and if you didn’t know better you’d say so did Francis.

Either way, nothing was going to stop you from petting Tama, Japan’s cat. He was an adorable little black and white feline with the cutest little bob for a tail. You had actually spotted him earlier and was about to go up to him before Monsieur literally jumped into your arms, demanding attention. Of course you weren’t going to say no so Tama quickly left your sight as you went to return Monsieur.

Wait, isn't Monsieur just sir in French? Oh well there was no time to think about questionable cat names, this building was full of them.

Monsieur wasn’t the only attention whore of a cat. Prussia’s cat, Purrussia, wasn’t much better. He would follow you down hallways and meow with his scratchy meow at you while Austria’s cat, Allegro, whined behind him. He literally tried to jump up at you a few times.

Of course both of them were interrupted when Hero ran straight at you and tackled you like a professional linebacker. You had thought that it was mostly fluff, but no, apparently Hero could pack a punch. He knocked the wind out of you as you fell backwards onto the tiled floor. The cat sat proudly on you and looked around like he was waiting for something or someone. Whoever he was waiting for, however, wouldn’t show up fast enough to see Purrussia return the favor and tackle Hero off of you, much to Allegro’s horror.

The white cat had a German ribbon as well but it looked like it was fraying at the edges. The reason you were bringing this up was because Hero was currently using one of the edges to try to choke Purrussia and Allegro was using the other to try to pull Purrussia away from Hero. Neither was really working and all it was really doing was making Purrussia more and more agitated.

“PURRUSSIA!!!” A shrill voice yelled out from down the hallway.

The cats stopped their roughhousing to see two of the countries barrelling down towards them. Well Prussia was. Austria was slowly walking over, looking more inconvenienced than anything else.

“Purrussia! Purrussia!” Prussia reiterated, pulling his cat up by its arms. “Did jou vin?!”

Everyone but the two Prussians stared in disbelief at his statement. The albino feline furiously nodded his head and if he could have talked you would have imagined that he would have been saying, ‘I’m awesome!’

Hero angrily meowed down below, as if to oppose Purrussia’s non-verbal statement. Allegro just haughtily licked his paw and stuck his nose up as if to pretend that he was disgusted with their fighting as if he hadn’t just been a part of it. Austria picked up his in-denial cat and you picked up Hero who calmed down as soon as you did.

“Sorry about him.” You said, brushing his unruly fur down with your hand. “He gets a little competitive.”

“Ja. It’s fine.” Austria said, petting his own cat. “Purrussia is not much better.”

“HEY!” Prussia yelled. “My awesome Purrussia is doing his best! And besides, at least he actually does something!”

“Jour cat picked a fight vith a vall (wall) Gilbert.” Austria sassed.

“Vell jour cat’s piano playing is trash!”

Austria gave a gasp of horror before inching closer to the Prussian.

“Jou take zat back, RIGHT NOW!”

Prussia just laughed, still letting Purrussia’s back paws dangle as he held him like one would a toddler. He got in close to the Austrian’s face, smiling deviously at him.

“Nein.”

He suddenly, while still holding Purrussia, took off, running away from Austria. He wasn’t far behind though and you could hear the man yelling in German all the way down the far corridor.

“Well Hero.” You said, looking down at the cat who had made himself very comfortable. “That was weird.”

He just snuggled closer to you and you sighed. You scratched him once more before heading down the opposite hallway. The destination was clear, before you could continue your cat quest, you’d have to get this one safely back to its owner.

You suddenly snapped back to reality, still sitting on the wall. The sun was now high in the sky and the spot underneath you was no longer cold. You were especially warm as you now had a Scottish Fold sitting comfortably upon your lap. Quietly cooing at the cat, you looked to see if there was any way to escape your furry prison. The most important rule of cats: once a cat sits on you, you’re not moving until they do.

You sighed, legs uncomfortably stiff. Scone was far more content and his bushy tail occasionally brushed against your leg. It was incredibly cute but it didn’t make your back stop hurting from being hunched over for the last half hour.

Voices came from farther within the garden. There were two people currently engaged in a soft conversation. You caught bits and pieces of it; there was a man with a British accent and a man with what you thought was American until you heard him say ‘aboot.’ You couldn’t help but snicker at your own observation, disturbing Scone in the process.

He scornfully meowed at you and you offered pets in an apology. Around the corner turned Scone’s owner and a man who looked incredibly similar to America. They both turned to look at you when the Scottish Fold you were fondling stretched out to impossible lengths and complained like a cat while he did it. England looked down at your lap to see his cat very happily cushioned on your thighs. The man next to him was also holding a cat who again looked very similar to America’s.

They were clearly different though. This man’s hair was more auburn and his eyes were a shade of impossible purple. There was also more of a wave to it whereas America’s hair was as straight as hair comes. Familiarity lit up in your eyes, not for the man however.

“Maple!” You exclaimed, wanting to go to the cat but also not willing to disturb the one on you. “How have you been?”

The men stared at you, wondering if you were talking to them or the cat. Of course Maple himself answered this as he jumped out of his owner’s arms and darted over to you. He gracefully climbed up the small wall and placed himself down by you. Scone was on your lap and he was nicer than Hero so as to not push him off. You moved one of your arms to pet Maple and kept the other on Scone. They were so cute you felt like you were going to explode.

“Oh.” A quiet voice spoke out. It came from the man behind England. “You’re Alfred’s secretary right?”

You smiled and nodded at the man. “And I assume that means you’re Canada, right?”

He looked a tad taken aback before nodding himself. “Yeah…” He trailed off and England instead picked up the conversation.

“I thought you were supposed to be watching his furrball cat, Hero.” He walked over and leaned against the wall.

“I was. But then he and Boris got into a catfight… and then America and Russia got into a catfight.”

Canada laughed in the background but quickly covered it up. England stared at Scone, looking to see if there was anyway to get him off of you without being scratched himself. He had enough injuries, that should have scarred had he not been a country, from the cat. He shivered a bit, though also began to pet the feline, scratching his under the chin.

“That sounds like those two.”

You hummed in agreement, continuing your affections. Canada also came over to pet his own cat who ironically did smell like maple syrup.

“Can I make you the villain of this story?” You asked England, gesturing to Scone. “I do actually have somewhere I need to be.”

“Oh I suppose I can assume that role.” He mused, carefully picking up his cat. He was not happy to be moved but England just shushed him.

Canada also picked up his cat who was slightly nicer about the whole thing. He fidgeted with Maple’s ear as he held him.

“I’m Matthew.” He said, carefully shifting Maple so he could put one arm out to shake your hand.

You finished the formal greeting. “I’m (Y/n).”

The other blonde butted in from the background. “I’m Arthur, love.”

“It’s very nice to formally meet both of you. Seeing you from across a meeting room doesn’t really count.” You smiled and gave a small pat to each of the feline’s heads. “Well I wasn’t kidding about needing to get somewhere. I really didn’t mean to get stopped as long as I did.”

You playfully glared at the Scottish Fold sitting comfortably in his owner's arms. He promptly ignored you, instead turning around cutely. England apologized but you told him it was fine. You were at least 50% sure that Mr. Jones was probably still fighting with Russia. Those two really were like angry cats. You waved the two men off and went on your way to find out the answer to that question.

Instead of coming across two feuding superpowers, you came across two of the Asian nations’ cats. You had already met them both but this was the first time you were seeing them together. Tama was sitting up high on a shelf while China’s cat, Meowzedong, was angrily meowing at him from down below. Everytime he tried to climb up, Tama would use a paw and swipe a book or other object down at him.

You flinched as a very breakable, very expensive-looking, vase crashed down. It was this movement that alerted the two cats to your presence and Meowzedong wasted no time at all to come over to you and complain. Now you couldn’t exactly speak cat but you got the jist.

Bending down, you carefully picked up the cat. Meowzedong always had a weird clump of fur that looked almost like a ponytail that, no matter how much China cut it, always grew back. He yowled at you and pointed a furry paw in Tama’s direction. The other cat had already loafed on top of the high shelf and you looked at him, back at Meowzedong, back at Tama, and then back at Meowzedong again.

“I don’t know how tall you think I am but I’m not that tall.”

Meowzedong just narrowed his eyes and meowed at you again. You sighed, looking back at Tama. If he had a long enough tail to flick it at you he would’ve. Sensing the futility of his quest, Meowzedong instead spread himself out in your arms and if you didn’t know better you would have said that he was mocking Tama. And if you really didn’t know better you’d say that it was working and that the bobtail was getting more irritated by the second. The personifications might have had to act cordial but their cats had no such qualms.

Finally, Tama de-loafed himself and gracefully hopped down a few other layers before reaching the bottom. He gracefully walked over to you and sat on your foot… Well shoot. What were you supposed to do now?

So here you were, from one cat prison to the next. Standing in the middle of some random, out-of-the-way hallway because the nations’ cats were all attention-hogging, though very adorable, brats.

You didn’t know how much time had actually passed. There was no clock in the hallway, you didn’t wear a watch, and both of your hands were occupied so you couldn’t check your phone. As cute as they were, your legs felt like they were about to collapse in on themselves. You couldn’t even shift how you were standing because Tama had taken it upon himself to lay across both of your shoes. Your arms also felt like they were going to fall off at any second. Meowzedong wasn’t a particularly heavy cat but try holding anything over five pounds for longer than five minutes.

You were desperately hoping that either they would finally get bored and leave or someone would come to save you. Wow you guessed you really did need a “Hero” right about now… Dammit you thought that referencing needing a hero in your head would magically summon America or his equally hotheaded cat.

“Tama. Meowzedong.” You murmured. “Can you please get off?” You hoped to whatever god or gods were out there that they didn’t hear the desperation in your voice. Never show weakness to a cat.

The two cats made eye contact with each other for a moment and seemed to come to an agreement. Meowzedong stretched his body out before jumping onto the ground. Tama did the same but instead greeted Meowzedong when he landed.

It wouldn’t be an exaggeration if you said that you collapsed onto the wooden floor below. You quickly got up however as you didn’t want them to see it as another chance to sit on you. At least not right now. You pulled out your phone to see all of the messages and calls you missed. You had put it on silent while watching Hero and forgot to turn it back to vibrate.

‘Oh my god Mr. Jones called me twenty-three times.’ You thought, frantic. ‘I’m gonna be in so much trouble!’

You raced down the hallway, startling a group of micronations as you went. There was no time to apologize! You had to keep your job! If not for you then for the cats!

Not even thinking to knock you burst open the door where America was staying, side note why wasn’t it locked? And were greeted with the sight of!... Mr. Jones… crying? His cat looked pretty dejected too and was currently hanging himself off the side of the bed like a rug.

“Sir?” His head shot up to look at you.

He quickly snapped his head back away, mushing at his face in an attempt to try to make it seem like he wasn’t crying.

“(Y-Y/n)” He stuttered for a second, before immediately going back to the hero persona. “Where’ve you been!?”

“Are you okay?” You ignore him, instead asking your own question.

You titiled your body to look at what he was looking at… Was that a framed picture of you?!

It didn’t matter because he was very quickly all in your face again. You could see what seemed to be a rapidly healing black eye and a tooth that hadn’t fully regrown in yet as he smiled at you. Just how long was he fighting with Russia for?

You sat him down on his bed, considering if you should even bother getting a medkit for him. Either way you ended up spending the rest of the day with him, watching movies and sitting what you considered a good ways away from each other on the plush couch. He apparently had a nicer room in all of England’s properties from when he used to live there during parts of the year.

Hero filled the gap in-between you of which America was mildly annoyed about. He kept trying to get you to use ‘Alfred’ but you insisted that it was unprofessional. He’d close the gap one day.

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marvelobsessed134 · 1 year

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Rizz you up (Kate Bishop x Fem!Reader)

Summary: at a party sitting with the Young Avengers, America bets that Kate doesn’t have rizz. And the archer wants to prove her wrong.

A funny fic that’s also really cute lol

“I guarantee you don’t have any rizz. Girl, when was the last time you had a girlfriend?” America asked, taking a sip of her Fanta. They were all sitting at one of the couches in the Avengers Compound. Tony decided to host a party to celebrate the formation of the new team. They were the center of attention.

“I do too ‘have rizz’ which, by the way is really cringey, Chavez.” Kate replied.

“No because she’s right. You get no play whatsoever.” Kamala butted in. The raven haired girl rolled her eyes, “Shut up, Kamala! I can get play. I can smooth talk my way into any girls’ pants.”

“Then prove it,” America said as she leaned back on the couch, a smug smile adorning her face. “Fine.” Kate rolled her eyes and then searched the room. Her eyes landed on you. Your short red dress and hair flowing over your left shoulder.

She couldn’t keep her eyes off you as she walked up to you, straightening her suit. You were just leaning against the bar, sipping a virgin margarita. She couldn’t help but admire the way the dress shaped your ass.

Kate licked her lips before clearing her throat behind you. You turned to see the archer. She looked very attractive in her black suit. “Kate Bishop. What an honor to meet you.” You gushed as you held out your hand. She shook it with a smile.

“Thank you. Can I ask what a pretty thing like you is doing at a bar all by herself?” Your cheeks were a light shade of pink when the words came out of her mouth. “Well, I somehow got invited to an Avengers party and now I’m here. I don’t have anyone to go with so I just went by myself. I don’t even know why I did.” You explained.

“Well then, I’m glad I found you.” She said before sitting in the stool next to you. You sat down as well. “Say, what’s your name, pretty girl?”

“Y/n.”

“What a beautiful name for such a beautiful woman.” Her voice was lower as her eyes raked over your body making you shiver. Her hand went on your bare thigh right below the hem of your dress.

“How about we go on a date sometime, huh?” She asked.

“I’d love to go on a date with you, Kate Bishop.” You responded. The two of you exchanged numbers and before she left to go back to her team, she grabbed your hand and brought it to her lips, the action making you blush even more.

After you said goodbye since it was getting late, she decided last minute to walk you out to make sure you were safe. She draped your white furry coat over your shoulders before walking you out to your car.

After you drove away, she walked back inside to her team and sat down on the couch with a smug look on her face. “I clearly have rizz, so your welcome. And thank you for getting me a hot woman to take out.” She said while the rest of the Young Avengers’ jaws hung open.

#kate bishop #kate bishop x female reader #kate bishop x reader #kate bishop x you #funny #cute #fluff #fluffy fanfic #gen z humor #tiktok humor #au where everyone is alive #post endgame au

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libraryofmoths · 9 months

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Moth of the Week

White-Lined Sphinx

Hyles lineata

The white-lined sphinx is a part of the family Sphingidae. They are sometimes known as the hummingbird moth because of their size and how they hover over flowers for nectar. The were first described in 1775 by Johan Christian Fabricius as Sphinx lineata.

Description The forewings are dark brown with tan stripe cutting across mirrors on both sides. The veins of the forewings are lined in white. The top edge of the forewing or the “costal margin” is outlined in a light brown and the forewing’s side edge or the “outer margin” is lined in gray. The hindwings are black with a pink stripe called the “median band.” The furry body is also dark and light brown with black, pink, and white stripes and spots.

Wingspan Range: ≈5.1 - 7.6 cm (2 -3 in)

Diet and Habitat Caterpillars of this species eat a variety of plants such as: Willow weed (Epilobium), Four o'clock (Mirabilis), Apple (Malus), Evening primrose (Oenothera), Elm (Ulmus), Grape (Vitis), and more. Caterpillars can form large groups when finding food and damage many gardens and crops.

Adult moths drink the nectar from various flowers such as: Columbines, Larkspurs, Four o'clock (Mirabilis), Petunia, Honeysuckle, Moonvine, and more. The type of flower an adult feeds from depends on the visibility during certain times of the day. At night they will feed from white flowers because they are easier to see in the dark. Durning the day, they will feed on brighter flowers.

This moth has a large range spanning from Southern Canada down to Central America, going through Mexico and most of the United States. They are found occasionally in the West Indies and on even rarer occasions in Eurasia and Africa. They live in habitats such as deserts, gardens, suburbs, and the Mountains of Colorado. However their population varies in many places.

Mating This moth has two generations per year with more in warmer climates. Eggs are laid in the spring on the host plants. A female can lay hundreds of eggs, which overwinter as larvae and emerge in February to November. This is also when they begin eating.

Predators This moth prefers to fly at night but can be seen during the day. It is preyed on by common enemies of moths: birds and bats.

Fun Fact Caterpillars were, and still are in some places, eaten by Native Americans. They were skewered, roasted, and dried to store/ground. When compared to hamburger meat, the larvae have almost as much fat but 1/3 less saturated fat and more energy in calories, protein, carbohydrate, riboflavin, and niacin.

(Source: Wikipedia, Moth Identification)

#libraryofmoths #animals #bugs #facts #insects #moth #mothoftheweek #lepidoptera #Hyles lineata #white-lined sphinx #Sphingidae

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enemywasp · 9 days

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Fiction does affect reality, it's scary to see so many people deluded into thinking it doesn't. Minstrel shows full of exaggerated stereotypes are a great example, the phobia of sharks after Jaws, y2k scares, thousands of people assuming furries are a kink because of a CSI episode, the list goes on. Wild that incest and abuse is played off as, best case nothing worst case romanticized these days.

Fiction absolutely can effect reality but it certainly depends on the audience, context and way it is handled.

Minstrel shows were specifically made to make fun of and mock black people, this is is essentially under the category of propaganda. Stereotypes are created and excentuated with the explicit goal of turning the public eye against certain groups. That is definitely a form of fiction designed to effect reality.

The phobia of sharks and shark killing example is mostly a myth, of course it did have a small scale effect but not to the level people often say. For one, it only really effected areas across America. Most shark killings are actually for shark fins or caused by fishing. I'm afraid I don't know the statistics of shark phobias.

I'm no expert of the Y2K scares but as far as I'm aware that was a matter of misinformation and mass panic rather than fiction.

Again we are talking of stereotypes when it comes to furries. I would never for a moment doubt the effect stereotypes have on people's mindsets. CSI has multiple cases of giving small groups a bad name. This happens mostly with minorities or lesser known groups that didn't get large amounts of attention in the public eye until this moment. It is often due to this information being stated as fact and piles of media jumping on this. I remember a furry was also on my strange addiction or a show like that where the directors actively pushed to try and make this poor person's hobby look bad and weird to the public.

Most classic TV shows, fandom content, games and Fanfiction is quite clearly known for not being factual or a basis for real life. Incest, abuse and pedophilia are well known and frowned upon topics. They're crimes, they're morally wrong. There is no unknown here, people reading about this in fiction are not only just hearing about these topics. An author does not have to say these things are bad and immoral directly for people to understand that.

The only content that should be spoon feeding you morals is children's shows, fan spaces are greatly not for children and most fan content is well labelled on its content and warning.

Very few people are going to read a story about incest and suddenly decide that maybe it's not so bad.

When it comes down to it the separation between reality and fiction it mostly depends on each media and each person. It's not a black and white situation

Sorry I am bad at wording things but essentially yes fiction can effect reality but this is not a constant. Every situation is unique.

#another moment of I'm bad with words #but essentially i agree fiction can effect reality #but that doesn't mean it always does or does so on a one to one basis #proship #proshipper #profiction #anti anti

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statecryptids · 5 months

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DEVIL MONKEYS- VIRGINIA

Though South America, Central America and southern Mexico have a great diversity of primates, northern North America has none aside from humans. This is ironic given that the earliest known primate- a small, squirrel-like creature called Purgatorius- evolved on this continent. Descendants of Purgatorius and its relatives diversified into several lineages of tarsier- and lemur-like forms that inhabited North America during the warm Eocene epoch before supposedly dying out as the land grew cooler and grasslands became more abundant.

A fossil find in 1960s altered this view when molars from a lemur-like creature dubbed Ekgmowechasala (Sioux for “Little Cat Man”) were unearthed on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation in South Dakota. This animal lived in the Oligocene, millions of years after other primates were thought to have died out, proving that at least a few of these lines had continued. Though no younger North American primate fossils have been found since, what if descendants of Ekgmowechasala survived into the present day?

In 1959 a couple by the name of Boyd were driving home near Saltville, Virginia when a strange, monkey-like beast attacked their car. They described it as having light “taffy-colored” fur with a white belly, and powerful, muscular legs. Other people in the Saltville area reported seeing a similar creature around the same time.

Then in the 1990s a woman driving on a dark Virginia backroad saw a creature run in front of her car that she described as black and sleek with a long tail, pointy ears, a short-snouted face, a man-like torso, and powerful hind legs. Though the earlier Boyd cryptid bears little resemblance to this animal- and may in fact have been a different species- both incidents have been conflated in pop culture as encounters with what have come to be called devil monkeys.

While the Virginia encounters are the most well-known sightings, devil monkeys have been seen throughout North America. Coweta County, Georgia, for example, is haunted by the Belt Road Booger, a simian creature with a “flat, beaver-like tail covered in hair”. Run-ins with the Booger began in the 1970s, many of them now believed to have been hoaxes by pranksters dressed in gorilla costumes. But other encounters have not yet been fully explained. The Belt Road Booger has become such a local sensation that a taxidermist in Newnan, Georgia even made a fake “Booger” head out of a white-tailed deer’s posterior as a decoration for a friend’s hardware store.

There is also possible photographic evidence of a devil monkey. In 1996 photos surfaced online of a strange, furry, baboon-like carcass lying along the curb of a Louisiana highway. Dubbed the Deridder Roadkill, the body bears a distinct resemblance to descriptions of these cryptids with its long snout, bushy-haired body, and ape-like feet. While some have suggested the carcass was a devil monkey, others have proposed that it could be a rougarou, dogman, or even a chupacabra. More mundane suggestions include a large Pomeranian dog, or even a prop. However, as so often happens in these cases, the body disappeared before samples could be taken, so its identity could not be proved definitively.

Devil monkeys are often said to have powerful kangaroo-like hind legs that allow them to jump huge distances. This feature has led some cryptozoologists to wonder if widely reported “phantom kangaroos” sighted throughout the US and Canada might actually be these animals.

While stories of large non-human North American primates like sasquatch and skunk apes are abundant in folklore and cryptozoology, no fossil evidence for these creatures has been found. Thus if they are real, one could argue that they likely migrated to this continent late in geological history along the same routes that humans used. Devil monkeys, on the other hand, may represent a species of home-grown North American primate possibly descended from Ekgmowechasala or similar animals.

REFERENCES

Eons. (20, November 12). What happened to primates in North America? [Video]. PBS.org. https://www.pbs.org/video/the-first-and-last-north-american-primates-dztigm/#:~:text=Why%20don't%20we%20have,and%20eventually%20they%20all%20disappeared.

Gilly, Steve. (2018, April 20). The Devil Monkey. MountainLore. https://mountainlore.net/2018/04/20/the-devil-monkey/

Grundhauser, Eric. (2016, December 22). Does America have a secret kangaroo population? Atlas Obscura. https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/does-america-have-a-secret-kangaroo-population

Leftwich, Rebecca. (2023, October 30). Who put the “boo” in the Belt Road Booger? The Newnan Times-Herald. https://www.times-herald.com/news/who-put-the-boo-in-the-belt-road-booger/article_ee9d689e-770f-11ee-a003-8bb851ca9cb4.html

Lynch, Brendan M. (2023, November 6). Fossils tell tale of last primate to inhabit North America before humans. University of Kansas. https://news.ku.edu/2023/11/06/fossil-evidence-tells-tale-last-primate-inhabit-north-america-humans#:~:text=The%20first%20primates%20came%20to,about%2034%20million%20years%20ago.

Morphy, Rob. (2010, January 13). Deridder Roadkill: (Louisiana, USA). Cryptopia. https://www.cryptopia.us/site/2010/01/deridder-roadkill-louisiana-usa/

Morphy, Rob. (2010, December 6). Devil monkeys: (North America). Cryptopia. https://www.cryptopia.us/site/2010/12/devil-monkeys-north-america/

Spooky Appalachia. (2023, April 26). The story of the Virginia devil monkey. [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nsv-mBSEX74

Taylor, Jr. L. B. (2012). Monsters of Virginia. Stackpole Books.

#cryptids #virginia #cryptozoloogy

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booksandwords · 4 months

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The Boy Who Wanted to Be a Deer by Ember White. Illustrated by Marta Maszkiewicz

Age Recommendation: Pre-School Topic/ Theme: Integrity/ Authenticity (it's all about being true to yourself so...) Setting: Unspecified, America at a guess

Rating: 4/5

I never would have found this or read it without stumbling across the author on social media showing some of their... weirder reviews, and tbh asking for Aussies to balance out the crazy. I saw at least one review calling The Boy Who Wanted to be a Deer grooming and to be honest, if you want to see it that way, that's how you will see it. Though why you would choose to see it like that I don't know. That's just weird. To look at this absolutely beautiful book as something with a malicious message is beyond me. I'm glad I did read this though. Not so much for Ember White's story as lovely as it is but for Marta Maszkiewicz's stunning illustrations.

I will make some comments on Ember White's story first. Let me start by sharing a quote from one of Ember White's tumblr posts. "I wanted to tell that story of anyone's who ever felt that they didn't belong anywhere. Whether you are a nerd, autistic, queer, trans, a furry, or some combination of the above, it makes for a sad and difficult life. This isn't just my story, and this is your story as well." Ember's story is quite unlike anything I've read in a while. Their story is well thought out well, and you can see that all their heart is in their book. You can see that their book is the book that they wish they could of had as a child. Embre gives us Tommy a young boy with a secret. In his case it is a pair of deer antlers that he keeps in a box and a want to be something else. The message of The Boy Who Wanted to be a Deer is to just be you. It shows the pain of repression, the pain that happens when you try to be someone you aren't. The phrasing is beautiful and enjoyable. I can see how this could be a very good read-to, it has the right message and easily memorable writing. The choice of a deer as the animal the boy wants to be is a good one. It's one of the animals with the most diverse symbolism some of the basics are harmony, happiness and innocence (phrased as being in touch with your inner child).

I would love to know who paired illustrator, Marta Maszkiewicz and Ember White. Marta's a perfect match style-wise for Ember's script. I adore her beautiful style it feels young and playful when it needs to and adds that moment of darkness when it is necessary. Her dark stormy moments with the purples and blues have the perfect depressing tone for Tommy's sadness. Storms have a rainbow-like background a nice touch. There is a scene where Tommy is looking at potential future careers (doctor, accountant, engineer), I love the choice Marta makes to give Tommy oversized clothes, a child playing dress up. Not just playing dress up but uncomfortable and awkward more than expected. Marta has done a fantastic job of aging Tommy up from his child self to his adult self to his true self. His true self is kinda in the middle in appearance, like he has shed the weight that he was carrying around as an adult that he has now shed. The dance/performance element is executed particularly well. I can sense the movement coming off the page and that outfit is lovely. The final illustration is just beautiful it is light and hopeful and innocent. Honestly, I can't praise the illustrations enough. I really want to find more of Marta Maszkiewicz's illustrations.

This is highly controversial and will remain so. It does what Ember wanted it to, it challenges the status quo and some people aren't ready for that. But some of us, librarians, parents and those outside the neurotypical, cishet sociocultural norms that are ready for it. The ending is unexpected but I really like that The Boy Who Wanted to be a Deer chooses to break the conventions that the children's publishing by giving the reader an unexpected ending of fulfilled dreams. I'm happy I read this and I think many others willing to look beyond the judgemental reviews probably will too.

Ember White is @emberwhite on here.

#ember white #the boy who wanted to be a deer #marta maszkiewicz #picture story #book review #ktreviews #read 2023 #booklr

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northwest-by-a-train · 7 months

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Mutual 1: I wish someone could kill me so I could be reincarnated as a saxophone solo in Al Stewart's 1991 song Year of the cat

Mutual 2: Horror keeps piling upon horror and we will live old and wrinkled in this time of horrors. The only cure is to post black and white pictures of men who have problems

Mutual 3: killing baby Caesar does lengthen the lifespan of the roman empire by ~350 years, as it dissolves into some sort of federalist-feudalist structure not unlike the Holy Roman Empire. The main difference is that a sort of loose syncretic pan-imperial polytheism is the dominant religion, leading to Icelandic temples of Isis and Ethiopian temples of Epona. As such, this timeline was spared the drawbacks of a centralized state-enforced organized religion. The main drawback is that being a furry is considered blasphemy by the vast majority of humanity.

Mutual 4: if Pendleton Ward does not make Mr Cupcake a Trotskyist I will set the cartoon network offices on fire

Mutual 5: if Serial Experiments Lain was made today they would make her cis. Well. Not on my watch

Mutual 6: Can we take a minute here and normalize arms trading? Marginalized communities need those 3D-printed untraceable ghost guns with Family Guy muzzles, I need to make a living since I was thrown out of the commune by Hannah-Arendts-Strap (message me for details), Seth MacFarlane needs people to watch season 27. But Academia will talk about Kant's white-ass categorical imperative to argue no one should sell guns. Typical.

Mutual 7: I am in your walls. Why is there lead paint on your radium plumbing my dude. You know that's not aryuvedic.

Mutual 8: I'm sorry but Robespierre was a scapegoat of most of the French revolution's atrocities, and bourgeois reactionary elements have tried to turn him into a proto-totalitarian crazed madman, but the historical record paints a much more complex picture. Which is why I don't believe he would ever whip Danton's ass like you just wrote. He would be the one wearing the ball gag. How can I make you see the truth my brother ?

Mutual 9: Arabic and Eastern European poetry have been superior throughout the late 20th/early 21st century. We also have the best cigarettes. If we keep going we can surround Constantinople in the next decade, and restore the Palaiologos to their rightful place.

Mutual 10: The callout posts are true. Reflecting on it, it was obvious that our attempt to create a secret #LiberateBelize discord channel without British people was chavphobic. We are listening and learning.

Mutual 11: Pinkie Pie could negotiate the Oslo Accords, but Bill Clinton could never bag pony Weird Al

Mutual 12: If I think about Betty Groff for more than two seconds I'll divorce my husband. I got the papers and everything. But I won't. I'm brave like that. #ChristianLove

Mutual 13:

Mutual 14: I was visited by the virgin Mary last night. Again. She told me I can't make my girlfriend pregnant like that. Again. But I know Ron L. Hubbard is with me, and it's all that matters.

Mutual 15: Mustard gas doesn't even taste like mustard. You guys lied to me. My Mac & Cheese is ruined.

Mutual 16: Stop saying my think tank advocates killing orphans. We're pro-harvesting organs in youth correctional facilities for reduced sentences !!! But again we see the pro-carceral bias inherent to Lutherans. Have you guys even read Angela Davis ?

Mutual 17: Here's my solution to the Israel-Palestine conflict: spend a hundred billion dollars for multiversal research, reach the mirror universe. Israelis get the biblical kingdom of Israel borders on this earth, Palestinians get the 1948 borders in the mirror universe. I think this is the fairest deal America can offer at this time.

Mutual 18: I tried to live the life of a restless European adventurer in Macau playing roulette and serving as a mercenary to various conglomerates. Turns out they also charge rent there. And income is taxable too. And I bet everything on Red. And I don't speak Mandarin, Cantonese or Portuguese. Help me pay for my flight home! 6¢/50 000$ collected!

Mutual 19: Yeah the canonization of Bolaño as the latest LatAm literary genius speaks to a sort of general malaise in post-colonial literature due to the collapse of magical realism as a viable tradition for meaningful political messaging. So the literature of unease and obsession and maladjustment itself is canonized, like an oyster canonizing the grain of sand that's tearing it apart. The fact that no other major voice has really appeared on the continent within the past 20 years should tell us this isn't working. Which is why the Brazilian JoJo fandom has a unique opportunity to meaningfully impact the course of world literature. #Multipolarity

Mutual 20: wow guys someone left a tray of perfectly good Mac & Cheese on a windowsill! Yummy!

Mutual 21: Did medieval surgeons pulling teeth get erections? I wouldn't normally ask this of my followers but I'm arguing about Sex Work with the ghost of Andrea Dworkin and I need hard evidence (no pun intended lol)

Mutual 22: Electro-Swing is a Belgian psy-op. I can't prove it, but I know it

Mutual 23: I'm the first neutered catgirl to be tried in a military court. But I know I'm not the last.

Mutual 24: Did you guys know you could eat olives? The thing they make oil from? I ordered three kilos of motors, so I can eat it with my roommate's Mac & Cheese

Mutual 25: Anglicans, amirite ? [Sounds of raucous applause]

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stupidbeecandle · 23 days

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Today i had the greatest gardening day yet! A big furry pest killed my cucumber and zuchini plants so I went out to the deluxe nursery to get replacements since its so late in the season I wanted to get starters incase my seeds didnt take

BUT

When i got there I talked to the staff and they let me dumpster dive and I got a ton of giant black plastic hefty (not pretty but useful!) 12 inch nursery planters (these are like 9$ a pop online). I also got a lovely 14 inch decorative pink planter bucket, and a ton of seedling containers

But! But! The holy grail of all dumpster finds! I was delighted by my 80 dollar haul of planters but theyd tossed a really rare (to me) Snowbank blackberry starter that looked to have had the shit beat out of it. But I think I can bring it back! It still has two leaves and its a rhyzome plant anyway.

These things are so cool bc the berries are pure white but taste just like the original blackberries. They have a really cool history too by the guy who invented the most common potato in america and really worked his ass off in the 1900s to address hunger and famine.

Fuckin sick. Im so excited. I tossed my new living babies and this lil blackberry cane in some of my best costco soil and he (blackberry is a he) already looks a lil better. Heres hoping he thrives!

#gardening #me #dumpster dive

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eli-being-silly · 5 months

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obligatory intro post.

hello! i'm the scary trans socialist facebook warned you about (if you're a terf i'll bite you)

name - eli

age - 16

pronouns - he/him (kind of apathetic though)

nationality - live in australia, scottish culturally

religion - agnostic ex christian, though i intend to convert to judaism once i'm 18

FANDOMS

like everything. bbc ghosts, sherlock, hell followed with us, the spirit bares its teeth, pjo, magnus chase, the kane chronicles, the magnus archives, malevolent, hozier, will wood, camp here and there, archive 81, the penumbra podcast, it, i am not okay with this, the secret history, the atlas six, if we were villains, etc. i like so many things i can't keep track of them.

DNI

i don't have any strict dnis. this is the internet, i'm posting on it, the general majority of the earth has access to the internet, so i can't expect that no one i don't like will see my posts.

that being said, the block button is my best friend, and please don't let my blog be a place for hateful bullshit.

DISABILITY

this might not be relevant for a lot of blogs, but i do post about disability on here, so i thought i should do a quick summary. i have hEDS, affiliated chronic joint pain, fibromyalgia, localised muscle dystrophy, autism spectrum disorder, and chronic fatigue syndrome, among other things.

AHH. THE FORSAKEN PART: POLITICS

i am a leftist punk. i indiscriminately hate fascism, capitalism, and bigotry, and any and all byproducts.

trans people are facing a genocide in many places throughout the world.

respectability politics is bullshit. if you can support a white skinny cis gay man, but as soon as you see a black fat trans lesbian, or a trans person who doesn't want hrt, or someone who is kinky or a furry, or someone who uses neopronouns, or disabled queer people, or cishet ace men, or people who call themselves faggots or transvestites or transsexuals, your allyship is irrelevant.

palestine must be freed. israel is a fascist, colonialist theocracy. that being said, jewish people have a right to self determination, and i'm fucking sick of people using the ongoing situation to justify antisemitism. hamas is evil, the idf is just as evil but much more dangerous because every major political power sponsors it.

(tl;dr) i hate netanyahu, i also often hate people who hate israel because they think that israel is jewish. they're antisemitic, not decolonialist. just like how decolonisation doesn't mean we have to push every white person out of america, israeli people should not be forced off that land

political and religious zionism are different and people's actual thoughts can't be expressed over a tumblr post, you need three hours, a pot of tea, and two armchairs to properly understand someone's beliefs.

if you're confused, i'm very very happy to talk with you in dms, even if you just want to make some casual conversation :) i love making friends

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mybrainisoveractive · 6 months

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Ahem ahem I present to you, not in any order, some words/phrases/ideas I associate with these fandoms (including things from fanfics & memes):

Percy Jackson- baby seal eyes

- Percy 'imma just insult the Gods' Jackson

- literally any demigod memes or/and water related memes (tho technically can be used for H2O)

Naruto- Sasugay

- that one drawing of Sasuke sitting with his fingers interlocked and just staring

-the bad timing pause effect on Sasuke (distorted body in an 'S' shape and arms in an inverted 'C' shape) with the caption 'I can see you! ' in a black box with the caption: S A S U K E he can see you'

White Collar - Neal NO!

- Mozzie making ridiculous theories

- crossover with Batman/DCU

Danny Phantom- little ghosty

- little baby man (LBM)

- literally anything green and/or glowy

- vivisection (AO3 tag)

- crossover with DCU/JLA/Batman

Merlin BBC (TV Show) - Arthur 'I must be lucky! ' Merlin 'hell no, that was me'

- clotpole (actually spelled 'clotpoll' outdated slang term for idiot/dolt)

- 'your Royal Pratness'

- Gay but Not Gay aka very very Close Platonic friends

- crossovers with Harry Potter (AO3)

Lout of the Count's Family (LCF) / Trash of the Count's Family (TCF) - Cale 'i want slacker life' , never really actually had the opportunity to Slack, half of which is his own fault

- Cale 'lemme just stab myself with a stick through my heart'

- ✨Misunderstandings✨

- 'cough cough.. oh shit there's blood'

The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System (SVSSS) - Shen 'I need to hug the thighs of the protagonist' Yuan

-Bingpup

- 'I can't be OOC!' That is Still OOC anyway

Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint - Self-insert Fanfic

- Kim 'im gonna sacrifice myself' Dokja/Kim 'im Yoo Joonghyuk' Dokja

- squid

- dumpling

- Sunfish

- regression

- existential crisis

- space time continuum

Jujutsu Kaisen (JJK) - death, death and dead

- Gojo aka the one with expensive eyes (and everyone simps for it)

Demon Slayer - Muzan 'he dies, she dies, everyone di- oh shit' Kibutsuji

Attack On Titans (AOT) - Eren 'im gonna kill all titans as revenge! But also..Like you know.. (✨becomes a titan✨)' Yeager

- Levi aka (also) the one everyone simps for (who is also a germophobe)

Case Closed (CC)/Detective Conan (DC) - teen ➡️ child

- teenchild blends in but still comes across murders and help solves it

- Teenchild also goes to teen-pretending-to-be-adult (dead dad)'s heist.

-Teenchild has crush on teen who is taking care of teenchild

- Teenchild is canonically called shinigami

Untitled Goose Game - a normal everyday murderous Goose

- 🪿 🔪

Batman- Furry Combat Brigade

- too many goddamn universes to keep up

- Bat 'i work alone' man/ Bat 'adoption problem' man

- alive ➡️ dead ➡️ alive

- Tim's lost spleen/ Tim Drake's Missing Spleen tag on AO3

Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) - war, war some more war

- Ironman vs captain America thingy

- wrinkled grape with stones

-Some time travel thing

-ironman with stones

Harry Potter - 'you are a wizard, Harry! ' 'you are a hairy wizard! "

- annual murder attempts

- 'did ya put ya name in da goblet of fire?!!?! ' Dumbledore asked calmly

My Hero Academia (MHA)/Boku no Hīrō Akademia (BNHA) - we do not talk about the ships, there are no ships sailing anywhere, not today, not in my mind, especially not the weird ones, please

- weird powers

-how did some students get in class 1-a?

-some people simping for Aizawa (his neck? I think)

- midnight's death 😔

- Aizawa's leg

- Hawk's... Everything(sad boi)

二哈和他的白貓師尊/The Husky and His White Cat Shizun/Erha (2ha)- sad backstory

- similar to SVSSS but sadder (probably cause of the different povs)

- love triangle (I think?)

Alex Rider - child spy

- Bombs✨

-quite a lot of dead people for a teen book

-child assassin

-pickpocket

Special mention(s):

-Hellblazer #247 (John Constantine)

-badly explaining all of omniscient reader in 6 minutes (YouTube vid by ferd) (if you want to know about orv without being spoiled but confused)

- So This is Basically My Hero Academia (YouTube vid by JelloApocalypse)

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tony-the-tigers-juicy-armpit · 9 months

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another echo worldbuilding detail:

chase thinks about raven: "they're [dogs] not common in Echo, or this side of the world, for that matter"

so it seems like people from the same area are generally the same animal, which i guess makes sense, but also doesn't? i keep imagining chase as a white man (because "Chase Hunter" is like...a pretty white name i feel like, maybe i'm insane) but if ancestral location dictates species in the same way it dictates ethnicity in real life, this would make chase indigenous american/canadian

and also, this makes a distinction between dogs and wolves. leo is a wolf, and is - ostensibly, could be a spaniard? - native to south america, and yet wolves in real life aren't native to south america.

also: kudzu is chinese, but raccoons aren't native to china.

the only conclusion i can come to is that even though history in echo's world has followed basically the same curve that it did in real life, evolution absolutely did not, which would make sense since hundreds of almost completely unrelated species across the world all became sentient bipeds. it's not out of the question that raccoons might've evolved in asia, or wolves might've evolved in south america, or otters evolved in wherever chase is from

OR...the furries in echo's world similarly all evolved in africa, and then evolved into other species - staying bipedal and sentient - as they spread across earth. this also doesn't make a huge amount of sense.

whatever

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rrcenic · 11 months

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hey you guys should read the winnie the pooh/bee movie (with a camp camp reference because i was a basic bitch) short horror story i wrote in 7th grade

cw for blood, violence, substance abuse, addiction, and overall gore/horror

Morning dawned on the little cottage in the Hundred Acre Wood. The little yellow furry yawned, stretched his legs, and slowly waddled to his bathroom. He looked in the mirror and saw Winnie the Pooh, an innocent little bear.

Well, at least, he used to be an innocent little bear.

It had been 6 years since Christopher Robin left for boarding school.

6 years since the honey addiction started.

6 years since he started trying to find his father.

8 months ago, Owl’s black market trade of honey smuggled in from America had gone dry. Apparently, the bees had revolted against the honey companies. But Pooh had enough.

Until he didn't.

Honey substitutes kept him sane, but they weren't enough. He had psychotic breakdowns, he was shaky, unstable. And worst of all: Christopher Robin never responded to his texts.

Piglet couldn't take it anymore. He did some digging online and found records of possible families. He gave Pooh the address of an investigation bureau.

So he traveled to America, with a note to the office. But at this point he’d given up on finding his family. He now had one goal in mind:

Find honey

Pooh pulled his black hoodie over his head as he jumped out of the white van. He quickly clipped the barbed wires and snuck into the abandoned honey farm. Sneaking in was highly illegal, and just the slightest creak made

Pooh jump. He took a deep breath and kept walking.

The abandoned hives had started to decay, the honey had rotted and turned red. In this lighting, Pooh could have sworn it looked like...blood…

No! he thought, It's just my imagination…

He stopped, and sniffed, his little black nose sticking tentatively out of his hood, his yellow snout scrunched up...did he smell what he thought he smelled?

Honey!

Pooh ran towards the hive, forgetting about the idea of staying secret. Sweet, sweet honey! He began to shovel it into his mouth, when he heard a small voice.

“Hey! Don't you know the laws!” shouted a bee, standing there with his arms crossed.

“It's just a little honey!” Pooh pouted.

“If you take another mouthful of that honey, you will forever pay the consequences!” the bee continued. “You’ll face the wrath of me, Barry B. Benso-”

Pooh had run out of patience. He quickly stomped on the bee and continued eating, convinced that the bee was dead and he wouldn't be bothered again. He scampered over to another hive.

Behind him, Barry’s hand twitched.

When he was full, he filled his van with as many jars of honey as possible. Pooh knew he had to get out of there fast, so while he left, he didn't pay attention to the 25 mph speed limit sign, and was half-an-hour away from the old farm when he first heard the police sirens. He sighed and pulled over.

However, the police officer immediately noticed the sticky red stuff on his yellow paws. “And one more question,” the officer asked after Pooh received the ticket. “What is that?”

Pooh panicked. Honey was illegal now, and he didn't want to be put in jail. “Uhhhh, corn syrup?” he cringed.

“Oh, really?” the officer scoffed. “It looks suspiciously like... blood.”

“It's not! I swear!” Pooh shouted.

The officer grabbed his paw. “Wait, is this honey?”

Pooh hit the gas

He quickly found a place to sleep. A dingy motel, the color of mildew, that smelled like wet socks. Pooh was so tired from the police chase and the jet lag, and the honey effects were starting to wear off. Pooh sighed and rolled over. He tried to sleep, but a little scratching noise on the wall kept him awake. Eventually, he sighed, took a swig of honey, and stood up.

“What is that noise?” he asked. Pooh looked over to the small, dirty window. It was open, and there was a hole in the bug screen. Small enough for a bee to fit in...

I'm just paranoid, he assured himself. Barry is dead. I killed him...didn't I?

“You didn't do a good job of it.” a buzzing whisper echoed around the room.

“Barry?! How are you alive! How do you know what I'm thinking?!” Pooh screeched.

“Oh Pooh, I was never alive. I’m not a normal bee.” Barry smiled a crooked, dead smile. “And you’ve destroyed my mortal body and taken my bee syrup. I'm here for revenge.”

“B-b-but where are you?” Pooh whimpered.

“We are right outside your window” the voice responded.

We? Pooh though. But he’s only one bee...

Pooh looked outside and let out a shriek.

Swarms of bees crowded around his small window. And they looked intent on revenge. Pooh quickly hid the jar behind his back and slammed the window.

Two hours had passed and Pooh was still cowering in his room. Sure, he had stolen some honey. Sure, he had squished the lead bee. But how did Barry get here so fast? Who were the other bees? Eventually, his curiosity got the better of him.

Pooh cracked the window. “Uhm, so sorry to bother you, but...who are you?” he whispered cautiously.

“We are Barry B. Benson, the reincarnation of every bee you’ve ever stolen honey from, and we are here to make sure it never happens again. Barry NEVER forgets. In fact, we are already on the path to vengeance.” the bees screeched in unison.

“What-what have you done?” Pooh whimpered.

Barry smiled. “Why do you think Christopher Robin won't talk to you?”

“H-he’s at school, he may have forgotten-”

The bees began to cackle as Barry held up a rotted head. Pooh’s vision clouded. No, no, no-

He was paralized by the indescribable sight.

(authors note: i edited this at age 12 im sorry)

Pooh ran.

The flight back is in 20 minutes, Pooh told himself. I’ll be fine, it'll be fine. He had all of his honey hidden under his fur coat, which blended in with his fuzzy yellow figure. As soon as he could see the JFK check-in, he slammed on the breaks and ran for it. Through check-in, through security, through international customs, and to Gate 1B of British Airways. The stewardess offered him a cup of coffee. He panicked and threw it back at her, covering her in boiling liquid and mumbling something about wanting tea. The seatbelt signs came on, and Pooh relaxed. He was safe now, there was no way Barry could find him here.

On the back of the plane, a woman asked the grumpy stewardess why there were thousands of bees outside her window.

Cameron Campbell was not your average man. He’d had several crumbling careers, including a failed fast-food chain called McCampbells, a Russian honey-smuggling business, a mini war with Kentucky, and a summer camp. But he’d spent his time in jail towards becoming a better person, and was ready for his first day as a co-pilot. His partner had gone to use the bathroom and left him steering the plane. He smiled, his grey mustache shining in the sun, and turned on the speaker.

“This is your captain speaking. We’re currently passing over the Atlantic Ocean. That island you can see in the distance is-”

He was momentarily distracted by a half-decomposed bee holding an ax above his head. Cameron dropped the speaker and screamed. “WHAT?! WHO ARE YOU- PLEASE DON'T KILL ME, PLEASE-”

With the speed of a bullet, it lodged itself deep into Cameron’s eye. With one last scream, his body went limp. Barry B. Beson was deep in Cameron’s brain. Barry concentrated hard, and bees swarmed Cameron’s eyes. Barry was now in complete control. Cameron’s body smiled and steered straight down, towards the ocean.

“We apologize for the noise and turbulence. Please remain calm. Everything will be fine.”

He clicked off the microphone and locked the cockpit door.

Pooh knew what had happened. He didn't know how it had happened, but he knew that voice. Barry had found him. Pooh ran as fast as he could, but he knew it was pointless. He was trapped.

The bees began to swarm throughout the plane, attacking the other passengers. Pooh hid under a seat, in an empty dog cage. The buzzing suddenly stopped. Pooh looked up.

There were people sprawled everywhere, covered in stinger scratches and dripping with red. Pooh tried not to vomit at the sight. A small child stirred. Pooh ran over, trying to see if he was alive.

“H-hello? Are you quite well?” he whispered.

The child turned around. In her empty eyes, Pooh could see the familiar glare of Barry B. Benson.

“Oh, I feel just nifty, Winnie benson.” it creaked softly.

“B-Benson? What?” Pooh stuttered.

“That's right, pooh. Why do you think you like honey so much? It runs in the family.” Barry’s voice echoed.

In a way, Pooh realized he’d succeeded. He’d found his father. But all these people would be alive if he hadn't.

The lifeless bodies of the passengers stood up and smiled at Pooh, blood dripping from their empty sockets. There was nowhere Pooh could run. He slammed on the cockpit door, knowing it would make no difference. Tears streamed down his face. No, no, no, this wasn't how it ended!

The door opened. Pooh ran inside and leaned against the door. He had about 3 minutes till the swarm penetrated the metal barrier.

Pooh curled up into a ball and screamed. He shouldn't have come here at all. Should have listened to his friends. There was no one to blame but himself. All the bees he’d killed had come back to find him. He’d tried to hide from it, but it was true. There was nowhere he could go where his past couldn't catch up. Nowhere he could run where his problems couldn't find him.

He noticed the parachute bag, 5 feet away from him. There was still hope for the little yellow bear! He wiped his nose, then quickly strapped the bag on and opened the emergency exit door. Pooh thought about everything he had to live for, took a deep breath, and jumped.

Pooh was falling fast. He fearfully pulled the parachute. It opened and-

He kept falling. Pooh panicked and looked up. The parachute was full of little, bee-shaped holes. In one last moment of paralyzing fear for what would happen now, he managed to squeak, “Oh, bother!” before he hit the water.

They never found any trace of Winne the Pooh ever again, except for a small, empty jar of honey with his TikTok username scrolled on the bottom. They never found the bees, either. But legend tells us that every time you take the life of a bee, its soul joins the ever-growing form of Barry B. Benson.

And Barry never forgets.

#i found it when going through old old docs and it made me giggle #i got an A because my teacher was lazy #nics stuff #winnie the pooh #the bee movie #camp camp

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