“Hey, I need to get married for bullshit Infinite Realms reasons, you two in?”
“Tt, of course.”
“Sure thing! Do we need to get going for that like, right now? Or later?”
“Eh, like in a couple of hours? The Observants are demanding some Royal Ball or something and they pulled out some stupid old laws out of their collective asses that if I’m not married by the time it starts they can assign me spouses of their choosing, can you fucking believe that shit?”
“Woah, what the hell? Can they even do that?”
“I was under the impression they were only permitted to observe.”
“Right? It’s total crap, but apparently there’s like this super old law on the books and they didn’t bring it up until now when there’s like no time left to try and force me to marry someone they pick.”
“They are training to gain influence over you?”
“Eh, more like they’re trying to get control of my Dad by way of me. But still fucked as hell.”
“So why do you need to marry both of us? Or do you just need to marry one of us and we should play rock paper scissor for it?”
“Technically I only need to marry one of you, but I don’t want them pulling out any loopholes or something. So, it’d be great if one of you could be my consort for my role as Queen of Mirrors, and one could be my consort for my role as Crown Princess. You two can figure who’s who on that all that, I’m good with whatever.”
“Oooh, can I be consort for the Mirror Court? I can annoy Kon more that way.”
“I am amenable to that. Grandfather will have a fit when he learns that I can cut his access to the Pits off at my discretion and there’s nothing he can do about it.”
“Awesome, okay are you two good for meeting up at like, three? We can pop over to my Lair and get everything sorted out there.”
“Works for me, my only class til this afternoon is at one and the professor already said we’re cutting out early because she has to go out of town this weekend.”
“Four would be more agreeable if possible, I have to take Titus to the vet for his checkup.”
“Okay let’s aim for four then. It’s just signing some paperwork, making some quick blood-slash-ectoplasm pacts and swearing a couple binding oaths… Should only take like five or ten minutes?”
“They’re not gonna make you have a huge royal wedding or anything?”
“Nah. Dad keeps things pretty chill so as long as the paperwork is all in order we’ll be good. Though once Auntie Dorathea finds out she’s absolutely gonna make us have one. She loves planning weddings. Swear its what she makes her hoard out of somehow.”
“So long as we have a say in some of the proceedings I have no issue with that eventuality.”
“Same, it sounds like it’d be a fun way to annoy the Observants even more.”
“Don’t for get all the weirdos trying to be my suitors and all that bullshit.”
“We have an accord then. We can reconvene at the usual place.”
“Awesome, you two are the best! I gotta jet and let everyone know and get the ball rolling on the paperwork stuff. See you guys at four!”
With that, Nomad - Stella Phantom, Crown Princess of the Infinite Realms, Queen of Mirrors, Core of the Speedforce and ghostly hero of the Titans and the Justice League - tore a rip in the fabric of space and time and darted out of the room the same way she came. Through the mind-bending tear in reality the eerie, eye-searing green of the Infinite Realms glowed in all its unsettling glory, Phantom Keep a glittering expanse of night sky made solid in the distance.
Jon waved at her cheerfully as Damian gave a nod of farewell before both silently turned their attention back to their respective tablets as the portal closed behind their friend and teammate and the glimpse of the Ghost Zone disappeared again. Completely unbothered by the conversation just held or the life changing implications that came with them.
Jon was humming as he tapped away at something on the screen before him, Damian propping his head up on his fist in vague boredom as he frowned down at the information he was reading.
The rest of the room Nomad had left behind was caught in a frozen, stunned silence in the wake of the baffling conversation they’d all just been witness to. All eyes in the room darted between Flamebird and Pheonix seated calmly at the end of the table, then to the space where Nomad had disappeared to, back to the young men, and then towards the head of the table where Superman and Batman sat looking bewildered and a bit on the verge of heart attacks.
The short status update meeting was about to become much, much longer it seemed.
Though a lot more entertaining.
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suicide cw
look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am.
ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.
this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.
He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!
you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.
it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions.
what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT.
am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying “only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!
yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).
The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.
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“Absolutely not.”
“But Ferdinand~” The new Aub Alexandria said, “Aren’t you curious about what could be inside it?”
It had been just another Fruitday for Rozemayne, waking up next to Ferdinand, sharing a gyu, having breakfast, doing paperwork until tea time and having tea.
However, unlike most Fruitday’s where they would have tea time in the drawing room, Rozemyne decided to exploit the perfect weather and have tea time outside in the gardens (Ferdinand could really use some sunlight, he was starting to look like a [vampire] staying inside for so long!).
Which had lead them to their current predicament as while getting ready to walk towards the garden in her new regency-inspired wrapper dress, a frantic Ordoschnelli from Philine made its way to her.
“Lady Rozemyne, there… There is a strange door in the middle of the garden with a wooden katze carved into it. I am unsure what to make of it.”
Ferdinand, upon hearing this, sent for Justus and Ekhart and had the knights on standby. Currently, they were trying to figure out what to do, Damule had sensed summoning magic had brought the door to the gardens, but who would do that? Why would they bring this random door into the gardens? Was it a trap, sent by a foe?
“Might I suggest I, myself examine the door and where it leads to?” Justus said, “I may be able to deduce how someone could have moved the door inside the castle parameter without alerting Lord Ferdinand’s wards.”
“Be careful…” Rozemyne said, “Who ever managed to get through Ferdinand’s defences… That too with none of us noticing… They must be very powerful and very skilled.” Nothing of such sort was described in the Book of Magic, not in hers nor Ferdinand’s, they were dealing with something new entirely.
“I will, My Lady.” Justus said as he opened the door.
As the door opened, Rozemyne saw the inside was bathed in a soft orange glow and… Sniff sniff… Was that… Sniff sniff… Miso?! Without thinking Rozemyne ran towards the door.
“ROZEMYNE!”
“MY LADY!”
“LADY ROZEMYNE!”
Inside looked to be the interior of a typical [Izakaya], how?!
“Hello and welcome~!” A server with dark hair and dark skin said, “Please! Have a seat.”
“Rozemyne!” Ferdinand started to scold her as Eckhart pulled out his sword and pointed it at the severs and the customers, Angelica and the other knights doing the same, “Stand back! These people are dangerous!”
“I’m fine!” Rozemyne argued, but Ferdinand was not having any of it.
“Not until we have done an in-depth background check on everyone here!” Ferdinand said.
Just then, the chef came out from the kitchen, “Hello there.” The man said, “And welcome, I intend no offence Sirs and Ma’ams, but please put away your blades, you are scaring the servers and the customers.”
“Who are you?” Eckhart said, though it sounded more of a statement than a question, not that Rozemyne was paying attention, the only thing she could smell was the heavenly miso! “And what is this place?”
“This is Nekoya.” The chef said, “We’re a humble restaurant serving western food, mostly.”
“A restaurant?” Ferdinand said, his voice was even but Rozemyne knew Ferdinand did not believe a word the man had just said, “Very well then, explain how your… restaurant had an entrance laying in our garden without any of us knowing.”
The chef just shrugged, something considered obscene amongst the nobility, “The details aren’t clear with me either, it just happens really. According to an elderly regular, it distorts space-time and multiple doors appear in many locations, all leading to this very restaurant which is in another world.” Another world? Rozemyne felt hope well inside her, were they in Japan?! “Please, have a seat, order whatever you like.”
Rozemyne pulled on Ferdinands hand, “Come on Ferdinand! You’ll love it! Everyone come as well!” Trust me! Rozemyne tried to say with her eyes.
Rozemyne could see the conflicted look on Ferdinand’s face, on one hand, he did not want to cause a scene, on the other, his survival instincts were telling him to take everyone hostage and look through their memories to see if they truly had no bad intentions, “Very well then.” Ferdinand said, “If Chaocipher hides within Gebordnung however, the consequences will be… Severe…”
“Excellent.” The chef said, “Riya, could you please hand out the menus? Oh and uh.” He looked at them, “Can you read the [Eastern Continent’s] Language?”
Rozemyne shook her head, “I do not know of this Eastern continent you speak about.” Ferdinand simply narrowed his eyes and Justus and the other retainers kept looking at everything, soaking up every piece of information about this place.
“I think they’re from that new place, Sir.” The server named Riya said, “That one where the other patron is from is from… Yurgenschmidt?”
“We are.” Rozemyne nodded, Ferdinand looked like he could pinch her cheeks for telling them such vital information.
“Ah well.” The chef said, “We have menus written in Yurgen as well.”
Riya showed them to their seats, because they were a large party, a few chairs and tables had to be pushed together closer. “Here’s the menu~!” She said, “I’ll come back in a [minute] to get your orders-”
“-Wait!” Rozemyne was acting unladylike, but she had to know, “This restaurant… He said this is a restaurant from another world… Is that world-”
“-Rozemyne-”
Rozemyne ignored Ferdinand, she needed to know, “-Is the original place, Japan by any chance?”
“Yes.” The server said, “How did you know?”
“We would like to have a few moments to discuss what we would like for tea.” Ferdinand said with a noble smile.
The server looked taken aback, “Oh- uh- Ok then, call me when you’re ready~! One more thing. I would recommend the melon soda, it’s a [fan favourite]!” With that, she left.
Ferdinand dropped his act, “What were you thinking?” He said in a low voice, “They could be enemies!”
“They know what Japan is!” Urano’s home country… How she missed it…
“Let us order something.” Justus said, “Keep our intentions under Verbergen’s shroud until Chaocipher comes out to play.”
Rozemyne looked through the menu, it was mostly western food such as spaghetti and pizza, but there were also japanese food such as chicken curry~ But what Rozemyne wanted was one thing and one thing only, “Excuse me?” She asked the server, “Do you have anything with [miso]?”
“All our set meals come with a bowl of miso soup.” The server said, “Are you [vegetarian]?”
Oh, the server must think she was looking for vegetarian options, “No, I just like soybeans.” Rozemyne said.
“Well, in that case we do serve [tofu] and [natto].”
They had tofu and natto?! “I would like natto with rice please!”
“Very well then.” The server started to write it down, “Would anyone else like to order?”
In the end, their table ordered:
1 natto with rice
1 chicken curry set meal
1 beef stew
3 chef specials
2 omurice
It took a while for the food to arrive, until then, they conversed amongst themselves.
“I believe they are telling the truth.” Justus said, “I sense no ill intent from any of them.”
“Keep your wits sharp.” Ferdinand grumbled.
“Ofcourse, My Lord.” Justus said, “I do find it odd however, they said they had another patron from Yurgenscmidht, I wonder who they are…”
When the food arrived, Rozemyne could cry tears of joy, but being a Lady (Aub no less!) She could not show weakness, instead, she slowly started eating, savouring the taste of every bite. Ferdinand, on the other hand, looked confused when the server did not taste test the food, “Don’t worry, everyone.” She said, “This is normal.”
“We must make sure this is not poisoned-”
Rozemyne stopped him right there, “It’s not poisoned.‘ She insisted, “If it was, they wouldn’t have been able to stay in business.”
Ferdinand just stared at her, Rozemyne stared back, “Let’s not make the servers work anymore difficult than it already is.” She said, pointing to the servers who were working in a flurry, between greeting new customers and taking orders and giving food and collecting the money, the three servers barely had time to breathe.
“I shall take the first bite.” Eckhart said as he used his knife and fork to cut into the pizza, he took a bite and slowly chewed at, after a few minutes he finally said, “I do not taste a hint of poison.”
The rest of the table sighed in relief, finally eating the food, their eyes lighting up in wonder, “The food is befitting to be served to the Zent!” Leonore said.
“Indeed~” Angelica said.
“Despite the rustic atmosphere, the food is sublime…” Hartmut said, “But the food Lady Rozemyne had created is better!”
“I agree!” Clarrissa said.
OOO
Riya was unsure what to do with the small gold coin, the food all together was seven large silvers but the newest patrons told her to keep it as a ‘tip’. ‘I’ll just add it to their tab’ Riya thought, Mako paid her more than enough, because he was paying her the salary of a Japanese server in Tokyo and Kolkata was cheaper and she was still living with her parents. She had so much money she didn’t need any extra money, the money she made was enough to buy at least 30 family packets of oreos each day. “Please come again next time!” She said to the group.
“We will!” The (maybe) twenty-year-old with dark blue hair and bright yellow eyes said. “We had a lovely time.”
“Please remember! The door only shows up once every seven days.” Riya said.
“Oh…” The lady looked heart broken for a split second but her demeanour became bright again, “We shall come next Fruitday again then!”
“Rozemyne.” The guy with the light blue hair said as he turned to look at Riya. “ We shall think about gracing this restaurant with our patronage. It seems Dregarnuhr the Goddess of Time has woven today's threads with exceptional speed and grace.” He said as he and the rest of the group left.
… What a weird way of saying goodbye… Riya didn’t have time to think about that as another customer entered, “Hello and welcome~! Oh it’s you, Shuu!” It was Shuu~! “I haven’t seen you in two weeks!”
“My manager kept wanting me to attend the Saturday meetings.” Shuu said with a sad sigh, “I managed to convince him to have those meetings on Friday, however.”
Shuu was a v-tuber, which one Riya didn’t know but she was pretty sure he was Akuma-Akuma (he won’t say however, that goes against his contract so Riya just has fun guessing). He lived near to the location of the actual Nekoya but after finding a door in his local library that lead to Nekoya one day, he also started coming every Saturday (Atleast, the ones he could manage to come). “Will it be the usual?” Riya asked.
Shuu nodded, “And today’s special.”
Riya gave him a thumbs up, “One melon soda float and one today’s special coming right up!”
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