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#either that’s true or I’m insane
snugglebeans3000 · 2 years
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Why am I so good at doing things last minute?? I wish I knEw because I want this madness to eNd
Also I don’t know what went wrong with my marker like????? My skin tones are copics???? I paid a lot of fucking money for these, why are they shIt??????
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mazzy-rockstar · 4 months
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Monday blues are hitting me hard today
#you can ignore this if you want cause im gonna talk a lot of shit and sads and feelings#but as i’ve realised i literally have no one to empty my heart out to irl#and it’s fucking heartbreaking cause i love my friends but I don’t think they love me back#which is an insane though but I genuinely think it’s true like#i moved away 4 ish months ago and i know that communication comes from both side but like i wanted to test smt#so i stopped texting first and guess what?? only 2 friends texted me#1 because she’s genuinely a good friend i think and the other because she needed money (which i gave her like a fucking fool)#my heart just hurts cause i realised i’m not as important to them as they are to me and I’m completely misreading our relationship and#it sucks because I thought they were going to be my friends for life but now they’re all posting recaps of 2023 and im in none of their pics#even in pics where i was present at the time#and i dont know if it’s intentional or if im just being an insecure little bitch but it fucking hurts#i just want to be important to someone#i want to be someone’s person#not a last resort like#they keep doing stuff together which i get like life moves on and i’m the one that left#but not a single text or a pic or a ‘we miss you!’#not even a fucking heart on insta stories#am i being desperate?? or do I actually have shitty friends#like i have impostor syndrome in my own fucking friendgroup???#I can’t just drop them either cause then I’ll actually have no one#idk i must exude some sort of energy#i dont think ive ever had a genuine good best friend like for some reason they leave after 3 years#(and this is why i have trust issues and attachment disorders)#anyway I’ll probably just suck it up and go about my day#ive lived 24 years like this what’s an entire life#it’s wild cause i have a good time whenever i’m with them (i think) and then i leave and it’s crickets#i feel like hired entertainment sometimes#idk my head hurts so I’m probably overthinking but like these feelings come from somewhere right?#i have to stop
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no1ryomafan · 5 months
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So I finished mazinkaiser awhile ago after months of procrastination on it and for one reason or another I’m not gonna give my solid thoughts on it but there is one specific thing I wanna point out, not as a critique but more so a confusion. That being: I find it weird how Mazinkaiser isn’t the turning point for Mazinger where they finally go “hey the robot is sentient” because it’s not yet near the end literally EVERYONE talks to Venus A as if shes actually a person:
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I’m not saying this as a criticism for the reason of my already biased to vaguely sentient robots-because as much as I prefer this angle with mecha, I understand not every and all mecha can approach this because sometimes the robot is JUST a narrative tool and not a character, which is fine-however I’m confused with Mazinger of all things didn’t take this approach when there’s already so much emphasis on Mazinger being tied to gods. I mean, apart from the fact the robots are based off Greek Mythology and there is a constant message of “will it become God or Devil” which feels like it warrants this enough, it would start to make sense if the robot grew sentient because Mazinkaiser is treated as the ULTIMATE Mazinger. (And where have we heard a case where the “ultimate” form of a robot starts to be the one that displays more self awareness *cough* GETTAH🗿)
Especially also within this ova- it seems to do stuff on its own accord to PROTECT Koji, like going on auto pilot as he’s knocked out and somehow keeping him safe from being burned alive in magma, but I cannot tell if this IS a indicator Mazinkaiser is actually sentient or if it’s just all auto pilot. Oh and it’s a more minor thing but also just- the human poses Kaiser and Venus take during the beach episode… I cannot tell if that’s something they wanted or if their pilots just posed them comfortably because lines seem to blur with the robots just being treated as the extensive of the pilots. (Venus is literally based off of Sayakas appearance after all)
It’s just weird Nagai never went this route and just stuck to metaphorical stuff, when it feels like SOMETHING he would do given the nature of his stories and yet the only fully sentient Mazinger media I know is Zero. Of course I still have such a limited window on Mazinger so if this is me actually being wrong please feel free to correct me, but I still will never not find it weird Mazinkaiser lacks this aspect asides from maybe vague allusions to it that may or may not be implying it. Maybe if I ever rewatch it or find more Mazinkaiser content specifically I’ll be able to piece things together a bit more.
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hydaelynsanswers · 16 days
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due to recent events i actually have decided that i DON’T have room for men and their mental health struggles. you’re just not elevated enough to understand me! only taylor swift does!
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diorsbrando · 2 months
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i am reminded why i can’t watch anime around other individuals 😵‍💫
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orrsoared · 3 months
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those viral videos of people scrambling to get the latest stanley cup in target - but that’s literally the nhl during playoffs.
there is no difference between a forty five year old white woman in one of those videos and sidney crosby.
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boltgunkiller-archive · 4 months
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my glee powers are too great, why’s my sister starting to get obsessed with it too
#miracle i haven’t made her rewatch sexy more than the one time she’s seen it#i seriously do not mess around about that episode#i’m nothing without analyzing santana’s behavior throughout it#the eye contact thing. her refusal to make eye contact during the sacred sexy sharing circle#and then her trying to keep eye contact with brittany throughout landslide to convey her true feelings for brittany#and prove that she’s being serious and genuine and that she’s full of love and wants to tell brittany her feelings#and even have a relationship. “it’s better with feelings” remember?#and then during the confession she’s still anxiously checking her surroundings#but she tries her best to look at britt#but then she gets rejected. and it hurts. and she closes up again and doesn’t even let britt touch her#she immediately turns away. no more looking#and then in 2x16 during the dirt locker scene she won’t look at brittany for a while either#she keeps looking at her locker (“i miss being your friend…” + santana replying with “still waiting for the question.”#like she literally keeps looking at her locker bc she got rejected and she’s reserved again because her expressing herself only resulted in#her getting hurt again… 😞)#and the “stop looking at me. i can’t remember my locker combo.”#yes it’s a funny line but also#distressing. when you examine her relationship with eye contact. naya’s acting is insanely good#Anyway idgaf about sexy guys.#this was meant to be about my sister my bad.#gleeposting
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cvctuslesbian · 6 months
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my mom tried to call me an idiot today because i said that i think the united states being built on the blood and subjugation of other people is bad
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arthur-r · 1 year
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i have the most insane fucking news
#fafsa got reprocessed they gave me a pell grant and my college saw that and gave me 20 fucking thousand dollars of grants#i’m in a special club now too with a special name for Scholars with Exceptional Financial Need#i fucking THOUGHT so. was terrifying when they gave me zero dollars and i am so glad it was a mistake#anyway i told my teacher this and he says it’s cause i manifested it….#i would say that my anxiety around the matter was not the kind of energy that brings in good things. but maybe i was secretly being positive#idk shdhdf it did arrive like five seconds after i decided i should commit anyway and figure out how to make it work#so then the universe said oh you’re actually gonna do it?? maybe i’ll save you from the hundred thousand dollars of debt actually#maybe college can be actually a possibility for you without ruining your life forever#so anyway everything is freaking incredible now and everything is okay#and i needed this. cause things have been getting worse and worse at home so like. positive news from an outside source is very much needed#i fucking knew i qualified for a pell grant and financial assistance i felt like i was being gaslit#they literally just miscalculated my family contribution. thought my dad must be funneling his income into something illegal cause we do not#have the money that the fafsa told me we did. but it was literally just fucking wrong and everything is okay#and my dad came into my room crying a couple days ago saying he wants to do everything he can to help me with my loans as soon as he’s done#with paying off his own or once they get forgave in a couple years. so arthur supportive father arc i guess. SHDHDHDF#that graph benji made about my dad getting less transphobic over time it’s coming true. guy put prefer not to answer in the gender section#of a form and he HOVERED OVER THE TRANS BUTTON. that’s insane coming from having screamed at each other about trans issues since before i#even knew that i was trans my dad and i had gotten in screaming debates about queerness and now he keeps saying weird stuff about how he#wants my life to be good. which is fucking baseline father behavior that’s what you’re supposed to get out of a dad but like. i have always#felt like i’m either drenched in expectations or that he just can’t wait for me to leave. so this is really good progress. and with the#financial aid that means that he’s actually going to be able to help. do you understand what this means my dad can help pay off my couple#thousand dollars of loans that are gonna be left over (cause now that they noticed i need aid it’s so fucking cheap) and do you fucking know#do you know what this means. i’m sorry for swearing i don’t know why i am. but what this means is. i won’t be in thousands of dollars of#debt when i graduate or i will be but the monthly payment will be so low and. i can get fucking top surgery is what this means. and go on t#i thought i was gonna be in so much debt that i couldn’t. but its gonna be like. a couple thousand dollars a year something insane like that#so foreseeably i could be getting top surgery by the time i’m 24. that’s insane i can’t even imagine#so anyway. just. everything is going to be okay and there’s actually hope in the world and i’m going insane#obviously saying this can very easily jinx me to literally never ever be happy. but i’m gonna take the manifesting route actually shdhdhf#my life will be So Good Forever. i Believe This Wholeheartedly. Good Things Will Come To Me#anyway i’m gonna run out of tags in a couple seconds but i really needed this you have no idea. i hope everybody is doing well
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starbuck · 1 year
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every time i listen to a mountain goats album i hadn’t heard before, i’m like “this is nice, but it could never become a no-skips album for me… i’ll just listen to my favorite songs from it” and then a week later i’m in fucking tears listening to a song on repeat that i didn’t get at all the first twenty times i heard it…
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goldensunset · 2 years
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shoutout to people who maxed their level in neo twewy and completed the noise report. how
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hobisexually · 2 years
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#I was at a fair all week#I don’t know how to talk about this really#but I met like 80 new people in the span of 72 hours#and I don’t have social anxiety#but I do have anxiety in general#and this entire week. just took so much out of me and I was confronted with myself So Much#I can do more than I think I can! true! but it requires complete compartmentalisation#and I’ve been shutting myself off from everyone since .#well since July basically after I got covid because my life got insanely hectic from that point on#and I’ve grown a lot. I have. I’m proud of the things I’ve done#but idk I find it hard to balance everything#and I find living just hard in general and even when I do these things like this fair#which was 2939:9;993 steps out of my comfort zone and I did WELL so yes I’m proud#but also I’m. frustrated with myself#and how difficult my brain decides to make things#and how disconnected I feel from everyone but how I don’t have the energy to do something about it#you know?#ah either way.#sometimes I wish I picked an easier job because no one seems to get how insane it is sometimes#and how it isn’t just reading#if it was that! it’d be fine#but every aspect that comes with it…… woof#idk the me from six years ago couldn’t have done any of this. she really couldn’t have#I was rereading conversations this morning and the me that I see there. holy hell I just want to wrap her in a hug#so I’m proud of what I’ve done in the mean time. I showed up for myself I really did#but sometimes I’m afraid I changed so much that I’ll lose everyone in the process#idk man post lockdown life is difficult#and my fear of covid is not gone by any means (not even after having had it) but we’re meant to continue on as before#and I can’t rhyme those two things together#ah. this is nonsensical and doesn’t even touch on 1% of what I was trying to say but WHATEVER
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the past few days i have tapped into a reading fervor that i haven’t experienced in many years. went from not having finished a book in a few months to finishing one in three days and getting 300 pages into another today. idc if i’ve read them a thousand times already it’s a crazy feeling
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sweaty-confetti · 1 year
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sweet-as-an-angel · 5 months
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MW Reaction to You Taking the BDSM Test
Warnings: Implied Smut, MW Characters Being Down Bad & Feral, Mean! MW, Rough! MW, Dominant! MW, Submissive! MW, Teasing, Petnames, Profanity, No Pronouns Used For Reader Except You.
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Ghost
His laugh is gruff from over your shoulder. A glower, if you listen closely enough. His hands, rough and calloused with the weight of his atrocities, clamp down on your shoulders. He squeezes them. Tight. Tighter.
“You don’t need a test to find out what you’re into, Love.”
He stands closer. From your position on the couch, you can feel something hard pressing between your shoulder blades. He rolls against you, his grip tightening. You whimper, wince, and he lets go a hum.
His hands drop from your shoulders to the front of your shirt. There, he grips the seam and rips it open. You jump, gasping, the buttons flying off into god-knows where — corners of the room, pinging off furniture.
His hands are on your chest, kneading, needing. He’s rough. He needs you now — he can’t even stop to remember to be gentle.
“I can do that,” he lowers his lips to your ear. His breath is hot.
“And more.”
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König
König had sat with you while you took the test, curious to see what you’d choose — what your heart truly desired.
Of course, despite how close the two of you were, you did try to retain what little of your dignity you could by choosing answers that didn’t make you look insane. Or nymphomanic.
Little did you know that König could see right through you, his lips stretching into a smile whenever he saw your fingers itching to choose the highest values for kinks he absolutely knew you had (whether you were aware of his knowing or not).
When the test was over and you got your results, you thought you’d walked it. “See?” You showed your results to König. “Told you I wasn’t into anything—“ you searched for the term he’d used. “Extreme.”
“Oh, Maus,” König said, almost growling. Purring, perhaps. His eyes were narrowed, feline. “We both know that’s not true.”
König took your phone and placed it somewhere out of your reach. Frozen with anticipation, you gave no fight as König took you by your shoulders and laid you down, pressing you into the floor. He brought his thighs over you, caged you beneath him. His hands either side of your head, he smiled.
“You needn’t be evasive with me, Darling.” His hips dipped down. Something hard pressed against your abdomen. König’s eye twitched. ”Now then, let’s see how many of your answers were true, shall we?”
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Soap
Johnny looks at you with what you could only construe as confidence. A challenge. You could feel the sly remark creeping up his throat as you tried to explain away the results of your test, trying not to paint yourself as someone whose answers suited them a little too well.
“Oh aye, Bonnie — I believe you,” came Johnny. With all the genuity in the world. “I just don’t think you do.”
When you gave him a queer look, his smile grew.
“What I’m sayin’ is you know there’s more to sex than that test’ll have you believe.”
Johnny shifted closer to you, eye-level with you. His hand came up to your chin, taking it between his fingers. He held you there.
“And I’d be more than happy to show ya what you’re missing out on.”
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Valeria
“Looks like mi Cariño’s had a little too much screen time.”
She’s on you before you can even escape to your lock screen, a viper-strike hand plucking your phone from your grip and throwing it over Valeria’s shoulder. It cracks, somewhere, but her frame is all you can see as she pushes you to the floor.
“Seems like you’ve forgotten your place,” she grunts as she forces you to the ground, watching you fall flat on your backside. The carpet is enough to cushion your fall, but there isn’t a material in the known universe that can withstand the fire in Valeria’s eyes.
“Seems to me that you need to be reminded what you like.” Valeria bites her lip, coming to stand over you. Her shadow roves over you, almost as if to grope you, feel you.
She brings her boot onto your chest. Keeps you down.
“And where you like it.”
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Price
“So you think I’m vanilla, Hm?” Price’s voice carried a weight you were not unfamiliar with, but the way in which he spoke suggested something unknown. His ankle sat atop his knee, arms crossed over his chest.
You’d gotten him to take the BDSM Test — “For science!” you’d told him. And, to nobody’s surprise, John’s results had come back relatively tame. Yours, however, were a different story.
John leaned back in his chair, his cigar lying in the ashtray, embers fading.
“Why don’t you come over here,” John said, voice low. He spread his legs, patted the expanse of his covered thigh. His eyes glinted with all the light of a black mirror.
“And teach this old dog some new tricks.”
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Horangi
Hong-jin had seen your results by accident and had decided that teasing you about it would provide him with enough of a distraction to stop himself from salivating at the possibilities they opened.
Sure, it started off tame. The odd comment here and there about you seeming to be ‘tied up’ with whatever task you were doing, that you were doing such a good job of completing your work, etc.
Anything to get you hot under the collar.
And, luckily for Hong-jin, it worked. You came to him, frustrated and very much in need of relief.
Hong-Jin hummed, putting you on his lap. He ground his thigh between your legs, calling you his “Good little pet — behaving so well for me.”
His eyes almost seem to glimmer as he tells you how much he should reward you for being able to hold out for so long. Something to the tune of an oddly specific interest you knew you’d never told him. But that’s alright; your scores told him everything he needed to know.
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Alejandro
He was NOT expecting the answers you got on your BDSM test. And you weren’t fully prepared for what you found on his.
Yes, Alejandro leans towards taking the dominant role in bed. Sure, not all the time, but enough that one look at the two of you could definitively conclude which of you wore the pants in bed.
Which, until tonight, neither of you had questioned.
“You know, Corazón,” came Alejandro. He sat beside you, not looking away from the TV. “It couldn’t hurt to…test some of our weaker areas.”
You looked at him, eyebrow raised. Then, it clicked.
“Oh,” you said, leaning closer, smiling. Knowing. Alejandro looked down at you. You could see him biting back a wide grin.
That night was spent with Alejandro bottoming while you went to town making him cry, whimper and beg for more.
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Rodolfo
You’d assumed that Rodolfo’s results would be, at most, rather banal. In spite of his military background, he was gentle — loving — when it was just you, him and the late hours of the night.
So, when you saw his results and discovered that, oh you’re kind of depraved, actually (in a loving, non-judgemental way; you just weren’t expecting how much his results told you he was into), you wanted to test Rudy’s limits.
A whole day of teasing, complete with a healthy side of blue-balling, had, eventually, caused Rudy to grab you and drag you into the bedroom, slamming the door shut behind him and locking it. He threw you to the bed, his strength masked by his lamb-like disposition.
“I know what you’re doing,” he said. He stood over you, arms crossed over his chest. “And I know why you’re doing it. You’re trying to make me cave — trying to get me to ruin you.”
You couldn’t have put it better yourself. But he could. He approached you, came down to your level, crawling over the bed. You backed up until you hit the headboard (for the first of many times, you suspected), and Rudy, with a dark glint in his eye, gripped the headboard behind you, trapping you.
“Trust me, Amour,” he said, bringing his face level with yours, his voice low.  “With the way you’re acting, you’ll be lucky if there’s anything left of you to ruin by the time I’m done with you.”
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Graves
Bless your cotton socks — you’d forgotten to close the tab on Graves’ phone that had your results splashed across it. Hence, Phillip was having a good old laugh about it now in the confines of his office. Though, the longer he studied your results, the stronger the throbbing between his legs became.
Of course, he sought you out. And of course, he made now secret of your faux pas. And, of course, you tried to explain it away. ‘I took it for fun’, ‘It was for a laugh’, ‘I didn’t t think you’d find it—‘
“Ah, there we go. The truth, coveted as it is,” said Graves, smiling from ear to ear. He stepped over the threshold of your bedroom, backing you up against the edge of the bed. He kicked the door shut behind him. No escape.
“Now,” he drawled, approaching you. “You’re gonna show me exactly what you’re into, where you like it,” He stood chest-to-chest with you now, watching you lose your balance as you fell back onto the bed. He all but pounced on you, taking your wrists and pressing them into the mattress.
His eyes were ablaze with a lustful vengeance as he pressed down on you. Into you.
“Or I’m gonna fuck it outta ya.”
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Gaz
“Didn’t know you were into…” Gaz squinted, looking over your results from over your shoulder. He went quiet.
“Oh…” From the corner of your eye, you saw his face turn pink. Then red. He cleared his throat and took a step back.
“Y-yes, well— uh— that’s a very…colourful scorecard you have there!”
Smiling, a hint of mirth in your eyes, you turned to him. You could see he was nursing a rather pressing, growing problem, and you sought to relieve him of it.
“How about you come and help me make it a bit more colourful, hm?”
At that, Gaz’s eyes widened. His tongue tied as he tried to form words — a word — anything !
Your smile grew. So did Gaz. “Oh, come on, Gaz! Big military man like you scared of a little fun?”
Let’s just say, Gaz also found himself taking the test shortly after you’d ruined him.
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annoyingatfirst · 1 year
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HAPPY POKEMON DAY ‼️ PRESENTS IN 45
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