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art · 1 month

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Creator Spotlight: @camberdraws

Hello! My name is Camber (any pronouns), and I’m a mixed media illustrator located in the southwestern United States. I love drawing everything, but I have a special interest in depicting strange creatures and environments, often accompanied by abstract imagery and mark-making. Professionally, I’ve worked creating concept art and 2D assets for museum exhibits, but currently, I am engaged full-time as a software developer and make standalone illustrations in my free time. I’ve been posting art on Tumblr since I was a teenager, and the site has been very welcoming towards my work to this very day!

Check out Camber’s interview below!

Did you originally have a background in art? If not, how did you start?

I’ve had an interest in drawing since I was barely sentient, but at thirteen years old I decided to become “serious” about art. I was all about reading tutorials and doing a ton of studies. I would tote my heavy instructional art books to school every single day (my poor back!) Despite all this, I decided to forgo art school in favor of a bachelor’s degree in Computer Science at my local college. Alongside my major, I received a minor in Art Studio with a specialization in fine art, which totally changed my views on creating artwork and drastically changed my style.

How has your style developed over the years?

As mentioned previously, my style did a 180 after I studied under some very skilled fine art professors! As a kid, my drawings were very realism-heavy and inspired by video game concept art. I mostly worked digitally, too. During college, I was thrown for a loop when we were instructed to do strange things like, for example, make a bunch of marks on paper using pastel, WITHOUT looking, and then turn said marks into a finished piece of art! I quickly and deeply fell in love with abstract work, and especially appreciated images that are not easily parsed by the viewer. Since then, I’ve made it my goal to combine abstract mark-making with more representational subject matter.

What is one habit you find yourself doing a lot as an artist?

Hmmm, one habit I really enjoy as an artist is strictly tracking the amount of time I spend drawing! I currently work a full-time job wholly unrelated to art, so I have to be careful with my time if I want to spend enough hours drawing each week. I created a spreadsheet that allows you to enter the amount of minutes you’ve drawn each day and calculate how much drawing time you still need to reach your weekly goal (I aim for 20 hours a week.) Having such a clear, numbers-based objective keeps me motivated to work like nothing else!

Over the years as an artist, what were your biggest inspirations behind your creativity?

I know this is a common inspiration, but Hayao Miyazaki’s work has been rewiring my neurons since I was a child. Seemingly all of my artistic interests can be summed up by the movie Princess Mononoke: it has strange/abstract creature designs, a strong focus on nature and environmental storytelling, and a mix of dark and hopeful themes. Additionally, I’ve been deeply inspired by video game series such as Zelda, Okami, Pikmin, and Dark Souls. But arguably, none of these have influenced me more than Pokemon! I’ve been drawing Pokemon since I could barely hold a pencil, and I haven’t stopped since! I believe my love of designing creatures originated with my endless deluge of Pokemon fanart during my childhood.

What is a medium that you have always been intrigued by but would never use yourself?

I’ve always been fascinated by 3D mediums and am so tempted to try them out! Whether that’s 3D models created digitally or sculptures made from clay, I profoundly admire artists who have this skill. Oftentimes, it feels like I don’t have time to delve into a totally different artistic paradigm. However, I feel very strongly that learning new skills can enrich your current work. I should take that advice and someday give 3D mediums a shot!

What is a recent creative project that you are proud of?

I am in the process of creating an art book (a dream of mine!) and have been executing smaller drawings of concepts I find interesting from both a visual and storytelling standpoint. A recent drawing for said book is that of a snail made of ink with an ink bottle as a shell, and it went absolutely viral! I’ve never had an experience like this as an artist before and it has been spectacular! I was able to open a shop using my newly acquired art printer and sell many prints of my snail. Creating something original, directly stemming from my interests, and having that resonate with so many people has been unreal. I couldn’t ask for more as an artist!

What advice would you give to younger you about making art that’s personal or truthful to your own experiences?

I would tell my younger self to chill out and experiment more! I was so caught up in the idea that I needed to have a realistic style to be considered “good.” I also believed that technical skill was the only measure of how worthy my art was. That’s not to say technical skill doesn’t matter, but I now firmly believe the creativity and voice of your ideas far outweigh the skill of execution in terms of importance. Technical skills should elevate ideas, not the other way around. Once I began to revel in strange ideas and stories for my work, depicted oftentimes in odd styles or mediums, I truly found my voice as an artist.

Who on Tumblr inspires you and why?

My peers here on Tumblr inspire me more than anything! Sharing my work with contemporaries and giving each other support brings me joy like no other, and keeps me motivated to continue creating. I wouldn’t be where I am today without them! @beetlestench, @theogm-art, @trustyalt, @ratwednesday, @phantom-nisnow, @svltart, @mintsdraws, @mothhh-hh, @jupiterweathers, @thesewispsofsmoke, @picoffee, @fetchiko, @kaisei-ink, and @pine-niidles just to name only a few!

Thanks for stopping by, Camber! If you haven’t seen their Meet the Artist piece, check it out here. For more of Camber’s work, follow their Tumblr, @camberdraws!

#creator spotlight #artists on tumblr #camberdraws

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ssahotchnerr · 6 months

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How about it’s the first year reader celebrates thanksgiving with hotch as a couple and wants to cook the thanksgiving meal all by herself to impress him but it goes horribly wrong… in a cute way lol

new traditions

cw; fem!reader, established relationship, mentions of food, aaron being the softest man ever <3 wc; 1.1k

you thought you had prepared for every possible scenario.

turkey, out of the freezer with plenty of time to thaw. you strategically planned out what was to go in to the oven when (you in fact, had made a spreadsheet). you had quadruple checked your planned recipes, making sure you had each and every needed spice and ingredient they possessed. if all went according to plan, your first thanksgiving as hostess would run nothing but smoothly.

the one thing you hadn't anticipated, however, your apartment's power going out.

your heart plummeted into your stomach when your apartment dimmed and succumbed to complete silence - the hum of the oven halting loudly. while it was instant, the sound seemed determinately slow, as if it were somehow mocking you. that yes, the universe was throwing a wretch in your plans and you had to deal with the consequences.

once your mixer slowed to a stop, you dropped it into the bowl with no condolences for the potatoes, quietly murmuring a 'no no no' under your breath. maybe you had popped a fuse, maybe all your lightbulbs had miraculously popped simultaneously, maybe your eyesight had suddenly decided to give up on you after all these years. but of course, you couldn't be that fortunate.

dinner was ruined.

you gave it an hour or two, in which the time the turkey should've been cooking, and you should've been aiding to all the other dishes you planned on serving. but instead you spent the time lighting candles around your apartment as the sun set, trying to come up with a solution, such as serving dinner, or some of dinner, late. but word soon spread; a tree branch had fallen on multiple power lines and since it was a holiday, it wasn't promised to be restored until tomorrow morning. perhaps the middle of the night if lucky.

defeatedly and regretfully, you grabbed your phone, selecting aaron's contact.

"hey," his deep, relaxed voice entered your ear, full of enthusiasm at that. "we're just about to head over-"

"about that," you cut him off, "i wouldn't venture too far."

a brief moment's hesitancy, "is everything okay?"

there was no use lying, as aaron could cue into every tone change and ultimately determine your mood or current state of mind, even over the phone. "no, my power went out."

"oh sweetheart," his tone deflated, and you could imagine the expression of sympathy struck on his face. "i'm sorry."

"no, i'm sorry." you peered up at the ceiling, trying to keep your inevitable tears at bay. "it's been out for a while, and pretty much stalled everything. i was hoping it would switch back on but it doesn't look that way. so i don't - won't have dinner ready, i'm really sorry."

"sweetheart..."

"i know you said your colleagues were throwing a get-together? i would just attend that. that way, you'll still have somewhat of a thanksgiving."

as you sulked, tossing a hardened glare to your kitchen every so often, a knock came from your door. you opened it to reveal two smiling hotchner faces, one just taller than the other.

"jack, what do you say?" aaron's hand found the back of jack's head, ruffling his hair in encouragement.

"happy thanksgiving!" jack rushed forward and hugged your legs, before scampering into your apartment.

"happy thanksgiving." aaron echoed with that smile of his, giving you a kiss upon his entrance inside.

you closed the door behind him, dazed from his arrival and the kiss. "what are you doing here?"

"you didn't think we'd let you spend tonight alone, did you?" he arched an eyebrow, his expression communicating a silent 'yeah right'. like a lost puppy, you silently followed him into your kitchen.

"we whipped up the quickest thing we had at home." aaron explained, unpacking the bag he had brought contents onto the counter. "to jack's delight, that happens to be mac and cheese. it's still warm, so we'll have to eat now. we also brought extra candles - i still can't believe it's this dark out this early."

you leaned into him as he spoke, your cheek pressing against the coarse fabric of his jacket.

"it's wonderful but," you sighed, speaking partially into his upper sleeve, "it's not the traditional thanksgiving dinner i promised."

"then we'll make our own traditions." aaron reassured, opening the tupperware of mac and cheese, steam escaping. "it's our first year, first time for everything."

"but the turkey-"

"-would've been amazing, i'm sure. but this was entirely out of your hands, darling, and we'll make do." he pressed a kiss to your temple, his voiced laced with such understanding. such sweetness.

"well." you warmed up a bit, straightening your posture with a little more hopefulness in your tone. "there's rolls, i suppose."

"see." aaron gave your hip a squeeze, the ends of his eyes crinkling slightly as he smiled. "perfect."

and so, your thanksgiving feast was complete with macaroni and cheese (albeit it was spongebob shaped), dinner rolls, cranberry sauce - the few dishes that hadn't needed help from the stove. rather than your kitchen table, you brought your set-aside-for-fancy-occasions dinnerware to your coffee table, and you each found a seat on the floor, cushioned by a pillow. it was filled with laughter, thoughtful conversations, aaron reminding jack to not talk with his mouth full, and you and aaron exchanging long, loving gazes back and forth.

truth be told, illuminated by candlelight and in the company of the two you had grown to love so immensely the past few months, you had forgotten the current circumstances.

once pumpkin pie was devoured (again, a non-essential of the oven) aaron pulled up a charlie brown thanksgiving on his phone, and the three of you curled up underneath a blanket on the couch. aaron in the middle, you and jack adjacently buried into his side, as close as close could be. but ten minutes in, jack crossed his dad's lap and crawled his way onto yours.

you also had a newfound appreciation of charlie brown's given meal to his friends: toast, popcorn, pretzels, jelly beans. even aaron shot you an amused yet cautious glance at the plot line - too soon? but once he saw you had found it humorous, did he lightly chuckle aloud.

sure, it wasn't the perfect, ideal evening you had originally envisioned, but it was one definitely worth remembering. one you could look back on and laugh at, and the reason why now character pasta was a must-have on the table for future holidays to come.

in hindsight, it was better than you could have ever imagined.

#aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner fluff #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotchner x fem!reader #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x fem!reader #criminal minds drabble #aaron hotchner drabble #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds x you

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haveyouheardthisband · 6 months

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『 FAQ 』

USEFUL LINKS: Submissions spreadsheet (gigantic list of every band submission we've received. Song submissions are on the second tab. If this does not load on your device, you can view a plaintext archive here.) Data spreadsheet (List of every band that we've posted or are still in the queue, in order, plus occasionally-updated data for finished polls.) Song submissions form (Suggest a noteworthy song for a band that's already been submitted but not yet posted. First-come first-serve. These are linked in a readmore under the band's poll.)

⏭ Y'all made a mistake! / How do I get in touch? Please scroll to read the whole FAQ first. If your question has not already been answered, then send an ask. We don't respond to most asks publicly, but we do read them all. We do not often check replies or mentions. Do NOT send band suggestions via the askbox, it is for correspondence only. (If the question/comment concerns a specific post, you can also ping me @estradasphere in a reply, but asks are preferred)

───♫───────────── ⏭ Why was this poll tagged with [x]? Genres are usually from the artist's RateYourMusic page, if they have one. Country tags are also from RYM - we tag both formed/birth location and disbanded/death location. As for decades, we do not usually tag all decades a band was active for, just a few that contain their most popular output. If we get any of these wrong, please send an ask!

───♫───────────── ⏭ Why was this album art used? If the artist has an RYM page, the album art we use is of their most-rated album on there. If they don't, we use Spotify or Bandcamp or other sources. We tend to avoid album art that depicts potentially triggering subjects.

───♫───────────── ⏭ This artist is morally reprehensible! We do not endorse or support any artists posted here. We're asking if you've heard them, not if you like them - and doing a background check on every submission is infeasible. You are free to warn others via reply, reblog, etc. That being said, we may reject submissions at our own discretion.

───♫───────────── ⏭ Can you add a "yes, unfortunately" option? No, and we don't think this is the best perspective to have. Every band is someone's favorite! We are not intent on changing the three options we have now.

───♫───────────── ⏭ Can you post more/less of [x] genre? We run entirely off of submissions, and go through those mostly in chronological order. We do not control which bands get submitted. That being said, we do try to space out polls in the queue if there's a lot of submissions of the same genre/vibe in a row.

───♫───────────── ⏭ When will band submissions reopen? If/when we get through the bulk of the current submissions. Our backlog is so massive that this may not happen until 2026 (at the latest) though. Sorry!

───♫───────────── ⏭ When will my submission be posted? You can check our progress by looking at the submissions spreadsheet. Finished submissions are the ones highlighted turquoise. Keep in mind that we post once per hour, and you can probably estimate the date from there.

───♫───────────── ⏭ Why didn't my submissions post in the order I submitted them? We rearrange the queue if there's a lot of bands of the same genre/vibe submitted in a row. Or for no reason.

───♫───────────── ⏭ Why didn't my submission get posted at all? A few reasons this could happen:

Your band is still in the queue, just not in order (see the question above this one)

Your band has been submitted before (search the blog or the data sheet for them)

Your band is so obscure we couldn't find album art or genre info for them

We genuinely made a mistake: thought we did them already, or accidentally skipped them, etc.

Feel free to submit them again (though, if possible, please first search the suggestions spreadsheet to make sure nobody else has submitted them again already). If you're positive your submission got skipped, you can also send an off-anon ask or DM a mod, and we'll post a poll for them ASAP if the submission is valid. Accidents happen.

───♫───────────── ⏭ How do I suggest songs for multiple-artist submissions? See here and here.

───♫───────────── ⏭ What's the policy on vulgar/offensive band names or album art? Generally OK, but it'll be decided at our own discretion. In the case of album art, we try to find one of the artist's other works at around the same popularity, and if we can't, we'll trigger tag it.

───♫───────────── ⏭ Why don't you tag polls with the band names? Tagging it would put the post in the lap of every fan who follows or searches for the tag. For popular bands, we feel this would skew the results too much.

───♫───────────── ⏭ Can you trigger tag [x]? We currently tag common triggers like gore, nudity, body horror, and suicide (as "#____ tw"); if we missed a post with one of those, please let us know! As for implementing new trigger tags, sorry, we have enough on our plate at the moment and probably wouldn't remember it. We recommend using Xkit Rewritten's post block feature and/or Tumblr's built-in tag/content filtering.

───♫───────────── ⏭ Have y'all considered increasing the post speed to more than 1 per hour? We don't really want to, sorry! Making 24 posts per day to keep pace is enough work for us already, haha.

───♫───────────── ⏭ How many posts are in the queue? It's maintained at around 150-250.

───♫───────────── ⏭ Do y'all want/need another mod? Not right now. If we ever do, we'll make a post for it.

#faq written by rottel and formatted by eddie!#talk #Last updated Apr 9 2024

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cassolotl · 1 year

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Results of the nonbinary name survey

Hi folks, just thought I'd throw together a quick report about nonbinary names based on the recent survey.

The survey ran from 4th until 13th May, and there were 5,179 usable responses. For this one I won't share the full spreadsheet of all responses, as it contains potentially identifying information. Having said that, you can find a spreadsheet of the information I can share with you here. Every name entered only once has been redacted.

Most popular names

Let's kick it off with the main reason I did this survey, finding the nonbinaryest name:

Alex was #1, with 1.6%, which is 1 in 62 nonbinary people.

Here's the full top 10:

Alex - 1.6% (83)

Jay - 1.2% (64)

Sam - 0.9% (49)

Charlie - 0.7% (36)

Max - 0.7% (36)

Ash - 0.6% (33)

Robin - 0.6% (33)

Rowan - 0.6% (31)

Kit - 0.6% (30)

Eli - 0.6% (29)

Name length

I'm familiar with the stereotype that nonbinary people choose names by taking 3 letters from a bag of Scrabble tiles, or that nonbinary people take letters off their given names until it's one ungenderable syllable, and I would like to take this opportunity to add that these are both excellent ways to create new names. :D

This graph takes a rolling median name length from the whole list, and it shows that generally speaking the most popular names tended to be shorter:

The average name length was 5.1 characters long.

This seems to support the stereotypes, but I feel it's worth mentioning that we can't know for sure whether it actually does, because for all we know, binary people's names might show these kinds of patterns too.

Number of names per person

Participants could enter as many names as they wanted, in a list separated by commas. That made it pretty easy to count them, and it turned out like this:

That's fairly straightforward, most people have only one name.

Problems with survey design

Overall I definitely feel that the survey had some flaws. I knew in advance that there would be some people who have more than one name that they like more or less equally, but for some reason the first question I came up with assumed that you have one name that you like most and then required a single answer from a list stating how that name happened to you - leading the respondent to a different section based on that answer.

What if you've got two or more names that you like equally, and one was given to you by your parents when you were born that you use for work, one is a nickname based on that name that evolved between you and your family and friends as you were growing up, and one is a name you chose yourself and your closest friends call you that? That's pretty much an impossible question, isn't it?

And there were several other questions in the survey that took that approach, making the data from those questions basically useless.

I didn't think it would cause problems for so many people, but it did, and I have learned my lesson there.

However, there was a question asking you to list all your names, and that's what I used to make the ranked list. I don't see how people with more than one name that they prefer completely equally (i.e. those people who would be thrown out of the survey by an impossible required first question) would prefer different names from people with one name only, so I think the ranked list is probably approximately okay, and same for the number of names per person graph and the average name length.

Implications

I haven't decided yet, but I definitely think there's scope for doing this survey annually - but separately from the identity/titles/pronouns survey, for anonymity reasons. It could be fun to track popular nonbinary names over time, similar to the popular name lists for babies that are usually split by boys'/girls' names. It might be a bit meaningless unless I collect country data as well though, which is why the list currently reads very....... American..........

Now that I've learned a lot from a big and not-so-well-designed survey run on my personal account, I'd feel more comfortable designing something a bit more fit for purpose, and running it from the @gendercensus accounts to hopefully get more participants.

~ Fin ~

#survey results #nonbinary #nonbinary names

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theboombutton · 3 months

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Bad Fictional Data vs Fictional Bad Data

WARNING: This post will include discussion of a name that might be Alice Dyer's deadname. I won't be calling Alice by this name or using it in the context of that name being a pointer to Alice, but I will be using the name, uncensored, when talking about where and why the name appeared in chdb.xls .

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You may know that as part of the ARG, the sleuths on Statement Remains uncovered a document called chdb.xls, allegedly a list that has something to do with The Magnus Institute. There's a list of names, ID numbers, first and last names, dates of birth, and information apparently related to each person's "score" in an assortment of psychological/personality tests. Three of the names in particular have stood out in a lot of analyses: Samama Khalid, Gerard Kaey [sic], and Connor Dyer.

You likely don't know that the commonly linked version of the spreadsheet, ported to Google Docs and linked in the TMAGP ARG Masterdoc, is presented out of order. (I'm guessing they didn't lock down editing until it was already all out of order from various people messing with it - totally understandable, this is not a callout post, thank you for making this easily accessible to people.)

But let me tell you about something I discovered by looking at the spreadsheet in its original order, and the almost certainly incorrect rabbit hole of theorizing it has sent me down.

Bad Fictional Data

Until episode 2 I had the same thought about the Dyer listed in the spreadsheet that I think most people did: that it was Alice's deadname, and that she had therefore been one of the Institute's young subjects. But after Alice had absolutely no reaction when Sam mentioned the Magnus Institute to her in episode 2, I now think this is significantly less likely.

Don't get me wrong: it's still reasonable to think that the Dyer listed in chdb.xls is Alice. Maybe she had some kind of supernatural experience that wiped her memory. (It probably wasn't that Alice was too young to remember, as the Dyer on the spreadsheet is listed as being at Piaget Stage 3, which occurs from 7-11 years old; but it's always possible that the Magnus Institute was using the names of legitimate psychological tests to hide their tracks when recording more esoteric data.) The point is, this isn't hard evidence that Alice has no connection to the Magnus Institute; it just made me go looking for more evidence.

I went back to the spreadsheet to look for more clues about whether or not this was Alice's deadname. What I found instead was some extremely sloppy fake data at the bottom of the spreadsheet.

For context, here are first ten names in the spreadsheet:

Note how each ID begins with the name's first and last initial.

Now check out the last ten names:

Not only do these IDs no longer always match their subjects' names, they occur in order: CD, EF, GH, IJ, KL, MN, OP, QR, ST, UV. The first names of each pair match the first letter of each ID, but many, though not all, of the surnames don't match the second letter.

My first thought was that whoever Rusty Quill had contracted to generate these names had gotten sloppy at the end of the list, created the IDs all at once using this alphabetical pattern, and picked names to fill in that roughly matched the IDs. But hey, we could use this to our advantage! Any name that was filled in as part of a series of IDs with an alphabetical pattern like this could be removed from consideration for red string analysis - we'd know they were meaningless fakes added by a lazy contractor, and not clues or characters that might show up again later.

Scrolling back up the spreadsheet, we can see the person generating the data having more care the earlier we go. We find the beginning of the AA/BC/DE/FG/HI pattern at line 136, but at first, the names mostly conform to the initials they've been given. JK09874 "Josie Jordan" at line 154 is the first break from the "first two letters of the ID are their initials" pattern; and breaks occur more often the further you go down the sheet.

Scrolling up to before line 136 (AA09911 - Aaron Atkinson), while the pattern isn't yet at AB/CD/EF/GH levels of obviousness, the first initials are still in alphabetical order. Zoe Hart follows Yara Logan follows Xavier Freeman follows Wyatt Edwards. The data creator skips a few letters - for example Niamh Fenton is followed by Phoebe Emmett, and S and T are together in the same line in Skye Travers.

We can follow this less-obvious version of the alphabetical pattern up to an abrupt break right at line 118, above which the IDs don't follow an alphabetical pattern at all. (They might follow a different pattern, but it's not one that I've found yet.) So that means we can discount all the names in line 118 and below as purely fake, generated lazily by a contractor, and not worthy of our attention for the purposes of red-stringing. Right?

What the fuck?!

(highlight is my own, it is not present in the original document)

My first thought was that the sloppy data generator had done the funniest thing imaginable, sending everyone on a wild goose chase about Alice's deadname just by having the name "Dyer" on the brain while looking for a surname that started with D. This would be Very Funny. No plot relevance, no implications, just the brain fart that launched a thousand theories.

My second thought was that maybe Connor Dyer was the last legit name on the list, and whoever started filling the rest of the sheet in with alphabetical junk data was inspired by the "CD" initials in the first place - whoever it was went on from there.

These are both valid thoughts! But I prefer my third thought:

What if it's on purpose?

Fictional Bad Data

There is a very obvious break between the set of data that doesn't look obviously* fake, and the set of data that is immediately identifiable as such. If we assume that this was intentional - and I want to reiterate that it all being unintentional is still a very real possibility here - why would someone at Rusty Quill want the data to be structured like this?

If the sharp dividing line between reasonable-seeming data and obviously fake data is intentional on RQ's part, it would suggest that we should take the data above row 118 as in-universe real data, and the data below row 118 as in-universe falsified data. It suggests that someone, either at the Institute or after its demise, was adding nonexistent children to the roster of The Magnus Institute. Why would someone want to do that?

There are all kinds of possible reasons, but here are a few off the top of my and my theorizing buddies' heads:

Financial fraud (institutional edition). If the Magnus Institute received funding on a per-child basis, they'd have an incentive to inflate their numbers.

Financial fraud (researcher edition). One or more people on staff were blowing off their child-analysis sessions and recording fake numbers for fake children. This would be ballsy as hell if they could be fired for it, but it was the Magnus Institute, so there's decent odds they couldn't be.

Scientific fraud (faking conclusions edition). The Magnus Institute in the Protocolverse claimed to be doing research on giftedness in children, which is the kind of thing that you'd normally publish in a scientific journal. It's not unheard-of for dickhead academics to falsify data to generate statistically significant results, since statistically insignificant results aren't going to get you published.

Scientific fraud (obscuring paranormal bullshit edition). If the Magnus Institute was using legitimate psychological test names to record Fear-related test results, it's possible their results showed different patterns from what you would expect from the real tests. They could have added the fake children to balance out the dataset as a whole.

Pseudonyms. The children are all real, the Institute just started using fake names for them for privacy purposes. They couldn't go back and change the names they'd already written properly for some reason. Probably something paranormal.

Those are all pretty interesting possibilities, and if we could narrow them down, it might tell us something about what things were like at the Magnus Institute before it burned down!

And the other big question is: why did RQ make the dividing line between the two sections, the first likely-fake entry, Connor Dyer?

One straightforward reason could be as a troll, a red herring to watch fans get in a lather over. And once the community inevitably noticed all the obviously falsified entries, RQ could eat popcorn and watch us lose our minds over whether or not that's even a real entry! (That sounds really fun, I would absolutely do that.)

But let's dig a little deeper, and look at what Connor Dyer being on the border between the real and fake entries would mean in-universe. Because of its position as the border between real and fake, it would be very easy for that entry to be accidentally included in the wrong group - a real research subject discarded as fake, or perhaps more interestingly, a fake research subject accidentally reclassified as real.

Remember, if a name is fake in the context of the Magnus Institute's research, that doesn't mean that the name itself is made up. If I was trying to think of a name that fit the initials CD, and those were the initials of my next door neighbor's kid, I might just write their name in as a lark. Especially if it was my first time trying to get away with falsifying information: this is a kid that verifiably exists and lives in the area.

My theory, supported primarily by my love for The Implications instead of actual evidence

Twenty years on, after all institutional memory of the fraud was long gone, trans icon Alice Dyer applies to work for the OIAR - an institution that (according to this theory) has an unofficial preference for hiring former Magnus Institute kids.

They are very confused when Alice proceeds to act nothing like a former Magnus Institute kid. It doesn't occur to anyone that her entry might have been falsified. What reason would anyone have to do that?

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* Of course people with a background in data analysis or statistics will see immediately that even above line 118 this is a wild-ass dataset that would raise red flags for falsification, but at least it's not "the alphabet over and over" levels of obvious.

#tmagp theory #alice dyer #tmagp arg #chdb.xls #tmagp speculation #tmagp #the magnus protocol #cw deadnaming

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ikeuverse · 11 months

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OUR KIMCHI — s.jaeyun

PAIRING: bf!jake x fem!reader GENRES: fluff, slight angst WC: 3.2k+

WARNINGS: a slight disagreement between yn and jake, nothing too serious, and a lot of fluff, mention of food (the title gives it away hehe).

NOTES: second enhypen story in a while, i've really gotten addicted to writing. i was looking at some pictures of jake and layla and just thought about it because, seriously, it's so cute. hope you enjoy it!

masterlist

Can you walk Layla today? I'll be a few extra hours at work. I love you guys, I'll be home with our dinner.

Jake smiled at the cell phone screen after undoing the buckle on Layla's leash, letting the dog run through the small park lit by the streetlamps. The boy sighed with relief that he had managed to get home from work early that day, no longer able to stand having to deal with numbers and spreadsheets for a while. It was a long way from his vacation - and he was grateful because he wanted to take it at the same time as you - so Jake opted to work some overtime and get an early start sometime during the week. Which was like today. And he knew you were doing the same because you would also need to leave work early sometimes to just throw yourself on the couch and rest. After a walk with Layla, of course.

The priority of the two of you with a canine daughter who barked excitedly every time Jake threw the colorful ball and called for her to bring it back. He genuinely laughed every time she ran towards him and even jumped on his lap, causing him to stagger and fall on his butt on the floor.

"Okay, girl. I guess we can go home" he was panting, and knew that Layla needed water by the time the dog had her tongue out "Are we lucky if mommy gets here before I get out of the bath?" Layla wagged her tail and Jake laughed again, as if that was the perfect answer to his question.

He then decided to let off her leash since it wasn't too far from where they lived to the park Jake had taken her to. He wouldn't have to cross any streets, so he felt relieved to simply let Layla free from his house. But the boy was wrong. Jake swallowed dryly when Layla barked loudly, running across the street and into a narrow street on the other side.

"Hey, Layla!" he shouted intending to call her, running to where his dog had gone. Jake was running so hard he didn't even know how out of breath he was and how his breathing almost failed him when he stopped running to meet her there. Standing near a pile of garbage and barking non-stop. "By God, do you want to kill me from the heart?" quickly his hands ran through his hair before resting on his chest to try to calm himself.

Layla kept barking, but as soon as she saw Jake, she started whining and even ran toward him.

"What is it? Is everything okay?" he asked as if she was able to answer clearly "Okay, where do you want to take me?" he asked again as she turned around and pushed her head into Jake's calf, forcing him to walk.

Without much effort to get to where Layla was standing, Jake felt a sudden urge to run away, because he didn't know what he would find there. And even less did he know why his dog was so desperate to show something in the trash. He had heard a few times from you that Layla liked to sniff strange places, but he thought it was normal because dogs usually do that. Only that was getting weirder and weirder.

"Layla, what—" Jake's speech was interrupted by a low cry, almost similar to Layla's. He widened his eyes before looking at his dog and then at the trash, mustering up a little courage to bend down and start pulling out some cardboard boxes that were there. Hoping that it wasn't a rat or some poisonous animal, or he would be putting his own life at risk just because of his dog's instinct to be so shrewd.

Once Jake got enough cardboard out, he moved a black bag that was torn, almost choking on his saliva when he saw that little shrunken puppy.

"Oh my God!" was the only thing he could say when, without thinking, he took it in his hands. Not caring how dirty the little critter was, just for taking it out among the garbage already feeling Layla around him barking louder "Thank you for saving…" Jake paused for a moment, analyzing the puppy before continuing "This boy here" he smiled nervously, holding him carefully as the dog barked and whined at the same time "You hungry, buddy? Hurt, maybe?" all the questions were directed at Layla and he knew that if anyone walked by on the street they would call him crazy because Jake was talking to two dogs.

But he didn't care. Quickly taking off his jacket, he managed to wrap the puppy in the fabric and held him carefully in his arms.

"And you, girl, will stay on the leash, I don't want another scare" with his free hand, Jake called for Layla to hook her leash onto the lead and make her more secure "Now let's take him to your vet? Will you be a good hero and share the care?"

And as predicted, Layla barked as if to answer him and Jake smiled proudly. Looking down at the puppy in his arms who had now stopped barking and was snuggling into the fabric of his jacket.

"Come on, he needs us, Layla."

Jake needed to walk fast until he got home and got the car, but that was no problem. As long as he could get the necessary care for the little dog, he and Layla would be happy.

Jake gave up counting how many times he paced back and forth in the living room of the shared apartment, wondering how he would tell you that now, in addition to Layla, he had another puppy in there. It wasn't definite, but when the vet said that he had a fractured leg and needed a place to rest for a few weeks, Jake quickly volunteered. The consequences of talking to you he would bear later, but at least the little mixed-haired one was sleeping on a makeshift bed in the corner of the room under Layla's supervision.

As he went over a whole convincing speech, all the words seemed to fade away when the clatter of keys was heard on the other side of the door. Quickly Jake looked at Layla, who already had her head up looking at him as well.

"You tell, I don't want to" he whispered to the dog, who stared at him without moving from her seat. At first, the boy thought it was cute, Layla was protecting the newly arrived puppy. Second that you had just entered the apartment calling for the two of you.

"I brought food" you hummed as you closed the door behind you. Jake stood in the middle of the living room when Layla finally stood up to run towards you "Hi my love, did you have fun with daddy today?" her weight on your legs made you smile, as you tried to balance the bags of food in one hand, with the other smoothing Layla's hair.

Walking quickly to the kitchen without looking at Jake, you left the food on the countertop and disposed of your bag on one of the stools, taking off your coat as well. Walking back into the living room, finally looking at your boyfriend who looked distressed.

"Is everything okay?" your question sounded so calm that Jake relaxed for a few seconds, just long enough to feel your arms around his body in a heated hug. He hugged you back, leaning in to kiss your lips as slowly as he could.

"Yeah" Jake whispered against your mouth "How was the overtime at work?" he was trying to make time so he could tell you, also letting the puppy rest a little longer before - maybe - you had a little outburst.

"Tiring" you sighed "But at least tomorrow I can get out early and walk you and Layla, can't I, baby?" your gaze searched for the dog and as soon as it landed on her, your whole body tensed "What's that?" your voice coming out a little higher from the fright, analyzing whether you had seen straight.

And from Jake's half-hearted chuckle, you weren't seeing things.

"Can you please explain to me why we have another dog in our living room, Jake Sim?" you were serious in tone, but you didn't sound angry. Still Jake shrugged his shoulders and when Layla let out a bark, the puppy woke up.

"Hey Layla, what did we talk about waking him up?" Jake pretended to scold her, running towards the small bed to kneel and pick him up on his lap "Hey buddy, I want you to meet someone."

Then he walked over to you with the puppy in his arms. He had a bandaged paw and you almost mumbled cute words when Jake was close enough to notice every little detail of the little animal.

"Love, meet our new guest," the joy in Jake's voice was that of a child who had just gotten a new toy. It made you chuckle softly, sighing as you accepted the little animal he was handing you, into your arms.

"New guest? What do you mean?" your question coming out as a whisper because now Jake had made you take the dog on your lap, and by the gentle way, he was coming back to sleep soundly in your arms at that moment.

"We found him injured in the street—" Layla barked right then and there "Okay, she found him. It was to her credit and not mine" Jake's frustration made you laugh, and you quickly excused yourself to the little guy on your lap when he stirred in fright.

Stopping to listen to the story of Jake and Layla, who found the little one injured, they both took him to the vet and gave him a proper bath. With all the consultations to get him out of there decently. But knowing your boyfriend, you knew that his huge heart would not let the little animal go to a place out of your sight. Jake would monitor him until he couldn't, and this whole guest thing wouldn't stop there. You knew that.

"Well…" you began, biting your lower lip as you handed the puppy to him again "We can't keep him, so… Have you thought about where to leave him when he gets better?"

"What?" Jake turned quickly to you after placing him on the makeshift bed. You were walking to the kitchen to serve dinner when he hurriedly followed you, "Why can't we keep him?"

You sighed for a while, not answering Jake as you went to the cupboard to look for pots and a plate to serve the portions and kimchi you had bought.

"Because we live in an apartment, Jake. And we already have Layla who takes up a lot of space" you had thought the little one sleeping in your living room was adorable, but thinking about how Layla was already there, it seemed impractical "Not to mention we barely have time for her. Let alone one more…"

"We'll manage. I don't know, I get off work early every day to hang out with both of them. I—"

"Jake" you called to him with a softer tone, causing him to stop talking. Jake stared at you with a sad look, swallowing dryly.

"He can't go back out on the street. Please, y/n, let's stay with him."

You noted that Jake sounded like a child asking this of an adult. And your heart broke when you nodded negatively at him, quickly, and the boy's gaze in front of you was bright.

"Okay. Thanks, y/n."

"Let's just eat…"

"I'm not hungry anymore, bon appetit" Jake left the kitchen just as quickly as he arrived. You threw your head back and huffed, trying to figure out a way to fix what you had done. Running the few steps into the living room, you realized that Jake was not there either. So he had probably gone to the room. It would be better to leave him alone for a while, talking in that state would not be very good.

"Are you going to hate me too?" you asked Layla who was lying with the new puppy the whole time. She lowered her head, seeming to feel the energy in the house. When you and Jake argued she always looked that way, so maybe it was no different. Or Layla shared the same sentiment as her owner, not at all pleased to hear that you wouldn't let the two of them have their new guest.

"Sorry," stooping down to stand near the two dogs, you stared at Layla for long minutes. The dog then looked at you and then stuck her snout between the covers of the quietly sleeping puppy. The quiet breathing and the little paws tucked in between the covers you identified as Layla's when she was smaller. You and Jake have never disposed of anything of her since you took her to the shared apartment.

"What have you done with those two, huh? You heart conqueror!" a whisper coming from your lips was enough for the puppy to open his eyes and move quickly on the bed. He barked a little, which caused Layla to become agitated beside him. "Okay, calm down," you ordered between giggles as the little puppy jumped on your leg wanting to climb into your lap. Layla, with her size, managed to knock you on your butt on the floor making you laugh even harder.

Now with both puppies close by, you gave Layla a long ruffle through her silky hair and kissed her affectionately on the top of the head as you always did. While the little one on your lap looked up at you intently. You looked back at him, holding him between your hands to raise him to the height of your face.

"I hate to be made to give in so easily, you charming little bugger," your voice deepened as the puppy barked and wagged its tail at you.

Then, in one swift movement, you also kissed the top of his head to put him back on the bed.

"I think I have to fix something first. Take care of him, okay?" your gaze ran over Layla and then over to the little dog who, even though he was awake, seemed to have enjoyed lying in his new bed.

Your direction then was to the room you shared with Jake.

Slowly approaching the room, you opened the door to notice your boyfriend lying on his side of the bed. The covers pulled up over his head, and only Jake's hair out of the blanket. You let out a heavy breath and decided that before anything else, you needed a shower.

You had barely arrived with so much information that you hadn't even taken off the clothes which you had worn to work.

The whole time you undressed, got yourself a clean set of clothes and showered, Jake lay motionless on the bed. And even though you knew he wasn't sleeping, you kept him still at all times until you slowly pulled back the covers to lie down on the bed next to him.

"Jake?" you whispered. He didn't respond to your call the first time "Jake, love" you called back, but he still didn't respond.

It was a difficult task for a grumpy, upset man lying next to you in bed, but you were not going to give up. So nimbly, running your hands around his waist and hugging the larger body in front of you, Jake moved his hands to place them over yours.

"Jake, talk to me" his request coming out as a whisper.

"No" the shaky voice indicated that he had been crying for a while before you came into the room.

"Then turn around and look at me, even if you don't say anything" your request, at least, was granted and Jake turned to face you.

His eyes were red evenly with the tip of his nose. You thought it was so cute that you wanted to crush him and kiss him, but then you closed your eyes and sighed for a while.

"I'm sorry for making you upset about this. Please?" your hand slowly ran up his arm and Jake closed his eyes at the contact, letting out all the breath he was holding.

Then with each sentence, his hands touched a different place. Now it had been his cheeks, squeezing them lightly and forcing a pout on him.

"I ended up speaking without thinking, and worse" you paused dramatically before sliding your thumb down his jaw, fitting your hand into the curve of Jake's neck "I tried to convince myself that what I said was an absolute truth."

"What do you mean by that?" the husky voice of Jake caused shivers to run through your body, you let out a long sigh when he opened his eyes and frowned at you.

"I mean I was right until I looked into those piercing, passionate eyes of that little puppy you and Layla brought in."

"Hey! Wait—" Jake's head lifted from the pillow, his eyes widening at you "Y/n…"

"Jake—" you called him as he did, widening your smile as the boy kicked off the covers and sat up in bed almost in a leap.

"You… I mean… Really?"

You sat up as well, feeling his hands grip your face and pull you close to him.

"Baby, is this serious? You're not kidding, are you?" he asked, seeing that you had denied it with a nod. "Can we… Can we keep it?"

"If you promise to do what you said."

"What? Leaving work early?" Jake asked.

"Yes. The three of us are going to need you earlier every day."

Jake didn't even respond with words, pulling you into a long, passionate kiss, almost throwing you on the bed again. If it hadn't been for the sudden barking from the other side of the door, the two of you would surely have deepened that kiss. Then you managed to shake off your boyfriend's elation when he got out of bed to open the door, revealing the two dogs standing there.

"Did you hear that, Layla? We're keeping Kimchi!" Jake took the puppy on his lap as Layla ran toward the bed to jump up and go on his lap.

"Kimchi? Have you decided on his name without me?" you asked laughing, earning the dog a lick on her cheek and Jake approaching with the little family member in his arms.

"I've been thinking…" he rambled as he sat on the bed, letting you pick up the puppy as Layla now went on his lap "It was one of the first foods we ordered when we first started living together. So it could be something of ours, you know?"

That had been one of the most beautiful thoughts Jake had verbalized to you. The way he thought of the name was full of affection and symbolism for their relationship. The nostalgia in remembering the sparsely furnished apartment when you first decided to move in together, but always ordering a serving of kimchi for dinner on the kitchen counter making plans for the future.

"Kimchi is perfect" you whispered, feeling your eyes burn at the sight of the dog licking your hand and snuggling into your arms.

But nothing compared to the warmth in your chest from watching your little family grow.

#jake fluff #jake angst #jaeyun fluff #sim jaeyun fluff #sim jaeyun angst #enhypen angst #enhypen fluff #enhypen x reader #jaeyun angst #jake fanfics #enhypen au #sim jaeyun #enhypen jake #jake x reader #jake sim x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen masterlist #enhypen imagines

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riririnnnn · 2 months

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As I mentioned in my post earlier:

His cuff (that thing around his neck) is near transparent which gives us a lot of room to ponder since we don't exactly know what this chain even represent.

Taking Hiori as an example, let's suppose the chain represents the burden that holds back someone's true ego.

His cuff being transparent gives us two things:

1. It might be plastic which doesn't really make any sense if I were to be honest.

2. It is glass which makes a lot of sense because how's glass? Hell yeah, my geniuses, glass is really fragile which completely fits into what he said:

Further, in that volume cover, he has pulled down his collar which puts a lot of spotlight into his blue rose tattoo, and we all know what that tattoo symbolises for Kaiser.

In case you don't remember: Kaiser got this tattoo as a reminder to himself to never fall back into his weak mentality because Blue Rose symbolises the achievement of impossible, and he saw it as an example to turn impossible to reality since Blue Rose, itself, is artificial and defies the natural order.

What is said above can be found with a quick Google search:

But what grabbed my most attention is this panel:

WHY?

If he only wanted to push the soccer industry to despair, then why he is adamant about winning the Champions league and the World Cup?????

Also, contrary to popular beliefs, I don't actually think Kaiser has a superiority complex because, look:

What Chris said could be considered as an exaggerated way to rile someone, but isn't this, indirectly, exactly what Kaiser says after the Manshine City match ended?

Kaiser said something along the lines of, "BM's main character is Noa and it's impossible for me to be the current number one, that's why I came to NEL to use Isagi as a way to increase my value." He even went as far as to say that he is a secondary character in BM because BM is Noa's team.

I don't think so that anyone with superior complex will admit such real facts.

Further, why did he got so angry when Chris said those things? Isn't someone bound to be angrier if the other one was to point out their obvious weak point? So, does this mean, Kaiser actually got an inferior complex?

I'm not a psychologist, so I'm not dwelling too much into it.

However, there is another thing I want to point out:

So, because of that spreadsheet/official art of a very damaged soccer ball beside Kaiser's foot, the Fandom widely believes that Kaiser was poor while growing up .

BUT!

Being poor as a backstory has already been used three times: Naruhaya Asahi, Noel Noa, and Lorenzo Don.

I understand that in any sector with a lot of money and/or fame, there are many people who come from a poor economic background, but this is fiction, baby. No author wants anything be repeated to the point it feels overused.

That's why, I highly believe that Kaiser was either bullied or mistreated by his seniors when he started playing soccer which explains that he practiced fucking hard that the soccer ball was damaged, and also his supposed hatred towards the soccer industry. It also explains his long, unkempt hair because he was too indulged in practice.

OR!

It goes a bit darker, so proceed with caution:

Soccer somehow destroyed his family's peace just like the brotherhood of Itoshi brothers.

I may write about others in another post, but in this post, I would like to think that the person who destroyed his family's peace was his own father. It could be that his father was a soccer player himself and due to some circumstances, he fell off the soccer industry which took a toll on his mental health, and he started physically abusing either Kaiser, his mom or both.

Why physical abuse? Because Kaiser is shown having an affinity to choking.

If we get our minds out of the gutter, then there have been instances when he choked himself because he was frustrated. Also, didn't he say that he stroked his rose tattoo as a good luck before matches and compared it to, "as if tightening a noose," or something.

That's why, I kinda think that, AT LEAST, someone has choked Kaiser as abuse/bullying.

I'll rant about the above thing in another post tomorrow or some time later because I don't want this post to be too long, and also because I'm hungry af.

I remember a vivid dream when Kaiser threatened me to join BM.

#blue lock #bllk #blue lock theory #bllk theory #michael kaiser #雪 ranting

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hotvintagepoll · 2 days

Note

I thought you'd like to know that I shared this rounds polls with my dad while we were waiting at the neurologist... and boy, did he have opinions! Some of the choices were easy. While others he went on five minute rants about (it was a long wait and to say he's a movie buff is putting it mildly... he carries an excel spreadsheet on his phone so if he sees a movie at the store/mentioned in passing he can check and see if he owns it (he's got over 3000 movies)). He wanted everyone to know that Katharine Hepburn aged like fine wine... but that Natalie Wood was waaaay hotter when she was younger. He feels the same about Jane Fonda and Rita Hayworth, BTW. Grace Kelly might be a literal Princess (and has the same hair color as my mom, which is def a plus in his book) but Hedy Lamarr was a brilliant, opinionated woman who took no shit (also a plus in his book). He couldn't decide between Lauren Bacall and Pearl Bailey because "They're both hot in totally different ways." He also is hunting down Marpessa Dawn movies now because of these polls.

So thank you for this... it made the 30 minutes we had to wait at the neurologist go by a little faster.

Thank you so much for this! Made my day. I am in awe of your dad and his movie collection!

#:D #family lore #asks

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justlemmeadoreyou · 6 months

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Vexed

Summary:(this ask) Hey, I absolutely adore your work. Could you write about like a burned out reader who doesn't feel like doing her work and needs encouragement? Been having a bad few months lately. <3

Word Count: 1.3k

Summary: mentions of crying, tooth rotting fluff

masterlist | ask box(requests are open!)

“Fuck!” you wanted to yell that, but ended up saying it with a gritted face. Your co-worker Theo was passing by, and seemed vaguely interested in your misery.

“What’s wrong, Y/N? You look…tired?” he remarked.

“I am tired. So fucking tired” you slumped down in your seat, slowly sliding down more and more into it.

“You could take a break”

“Break? That’s what you’re suggesting? You know how many deadlines and pile-ups we have, right?” you raised your eyebrows, too annoyed at him already.

“I know that Y/n. I’m quite burnt out myself. But if you take a break, things will be a bit better.”

“I don’t have time for a fucking break, Theo” you put your right palm on your head, which was throbbing from stress.

"Look, I get that you're stressed, but you don't have to take it out on me. Maybe if you focused on the work instead of yelling at everyone, you wouldn't be in this mess."

“Oh thank you, Theo! I was so desperately in need of a lecture from you, aren’t I? Just go away!” you yelled again, and he got pissed off, and left.

You couldn’t stand being there anymore. The atmosphere was so frustrating. Everyone clammed up in a small space, running around, doing their work. It shouldn’t be frustrating per-se, but you were. You had been working without rest for the past 40 hours, and there were so many projects and reports lined up, you wanted to scream. And cry too, maybe?

Gathering up your stuff from your table, some files, your laptop and stationary, you decided you would do this at home. After you had had “a break”.

Driving to your house was miserable too, every signal seemed so much longer than it actually was. Every speeding car that made you slam your brakes hard made you want to get out of the car and yell and curse them. It was so vexing.

Pulling up to your house, you parked the car in the garage, and got out. You left your stuff in your car, deciding to take it out later when you actually felt like working.

You lived with your boyfriend, Harry. You had been in a relationship for more than a year, and had just moved in a few months ago.

Everything about him was great. He was so loving, you loved him so much. He took care of you, you cooked and baked together. After a long day of work for the both of you, he would be there for you, holding you and comforting you, telling you that everything will be alright.

You missed him so much. You wished he would come home early.

As soon as you entered, the dark house resembled the state of your mind, all blank and foggy, unclear with no idea where to go. You decided to take a shower and cry.

You walked to your shared bedroom, stripping off your clothes one by one. As soon as you entered your bathroom, you threw everything away, opened your hair and turned the water on, standing below it.

As the water cascaded down, you couldn't hold back the tears any longer. The day's challenges, the pressure, the relentless tide of responsibilities—it all spilled out in the form of silent sobs. Alone in the shower, you let the water wash away the stress, if only for a moment.

Tears streamed down your face, flowing away with the water into the drain. It all felt so meaningless in the moment. Your job, the never-ending work, the deadlines, the piled up spreadsheets, the tension, the stress. It was eating you alive.

Little did you know, Harry had come back soon too. He parked his range rover, and saw your car too. He became happy that you were home soon, and you would get to spend some more time together.

As soon as he reached the door, he found out that it wasn’t locked. He panicked, thinking that someone must have barged in.

“Y/N?” he screamed at the top of his voice, opening the door and locking it. Inside, all the lights were out, and it got more and more mysterious.

He yelled your name, searching for you in the kitchen, in the living room, in the backyard, everywhere. Finally, he climbed up the stairs and went to your bedroom.

There, he saw some of your clothes lying on the floor, and heard the shower. He quickly jogged, and barged in.

He saw you standing under the shower, cold water pouring down. Your back was turned to him, shoulders quivering with each silent sob.

You had had a bad day.

You turned around to look at him, and just stared at him for a second. You turned back around, trying to stop your crying.

“Lovie, you okay?” he asked in a very soft voice, already inside the shower and closing the door behind him.

You sniffled, trying to compose yourself. "Yeah, just needed a moment. It's been a day."

“Sure, love. Mind if I join?”

You nodded silently. You both knew how much you needed his presence, him, in this moment.

He quietly stripped down behind you, and walked in, closing the shower curtain.

As soon as he was near, you quickly turned around, hugging him. Your sobs and tears flew freely, without a care in the world. Harry held you tightly, rubbing your back, trying to calm you down.

"It's okay, lovie. It's all okay. Shh," he reassured, gently patting your back, allowing you to cry as much as needed. He was present now, and he wouldn't let you go through this alone.

After a few moments, your tears had stopped, and there were only sobs coming out of your mouth. You pulled yourself from his embrace, looking into his bright green eyes with swollen ones.

“I’m sorry, I’m too much sometimes” you tried to pull off of him, wanting to give him space if he wanted.

“No, please don’t say that. You’re never too much.”

“It’s just that-there’s so so much work, Harry. So much workload piled up, and I don’t want to do anything. I just want to burn everything away and sleep. “

“It’s okay. You’ll be okay. Understand? There’s no need to blame yourselves. You’re so good at your job. You’ll figure it out. I know you will.” He kissed your forehead gently, and you sheepishly smiled.

“Thank you, Harry. I love you so much.”

“I love you too, love. Now, how long have you been standing under this ice-cold water?”

“Long enough”

“Alright, let’s get out before we get sick”

He walked across the shower and brought you a warm, fluffy towel, softly wrapping it around you. You were shivering now, and he looked at you with disbelief.

“I’m sorry! I just wanted to cool off.” You pouted cutely, and his frown immediately went away.

“Can’t get angry at my cute bunny, can I?”

You smiled, and you both walked out of the shower. He dried you off outside, picking up fresh pajamas to wear.

“Tell you what. I’ll bake you some cookies. With that new frosting we bought. And some coffee too?”

“No. Hot chocolate”

“Sure, love. You can find a movie for us to watch till I make you food.”

“But I want to be with you” you walked over to him, clinging to his body like a koala bear.

“Okay, love. You can sit on the island and I’ll feed you cookie dough.”

“And chocolates”

“And chocolates.”

“And kisses too?”

“So many kisses for you, my love”

a/n: to the anon who requested this, i hope you liked it. sorry for the daly, and i really hop you're alright, love! you can talk to me whenever you want

lovely divider by @cafekitsune

i hope you like this! please don't hate me

here's my ko-fi if you feel generous

requests and feedback is welcome and much appreciated!!

>>>

general taglist:

@freedomfireflies @gurugirl @thechaoticjoy @styleslover-1994 @gem1712 @ellaorchard @bxbyysstuff @opheliaofficial07 @rafaaoli @tchlamqtsgf @the-mouse27 @indierockgirrl @vrittivsanghavi @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @drewrry @babyiamperfectforyou @me-undiscovered @tbsloneely @whoreonmondays @kathb59 @avalentina @kittenhere @speedywritingharrystylesjudge @mypolicemanharryyy @theendx888

let me know if you want to be added, removed

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blue-macaron · 6 months

Text

kiss kiss kiss!

characters: rei sakuma, cameos / mentions of other characters x gn!reader, fluff, slightly suggestive(?), total 1.5k words a/n: This is such a rushed happy birthday fic for Rei but I really wanted to get something out for him!!! Also hello from like 6+ months worth of hiatus, I've been busy and too tired to write anything >_< (then of course rei's birthday shoots ideas through me) Happy Birthday Rei!!

"My dear, how could you? Woe is me, no love from my other half, my soulmate, my lover, my-"

You threw a pillow at Rei, effectively shutting him up from saying anything more corny at your face. Rubbing the back of your neck, you sighed as Rei seemed to sigh even more.

"Rei, I love you, but I need to get this done before I can spend a little time with you.." You trailed off, not sure what else to say.

In reality, the "assignment" that you were working on was actually a spreadsheet that was shared with a good chunk of Rei's friends to celebrate his birthday that was coming up. Plans and ideas littered the columns, and check marks for what had already been done.

The plan was to trick Rei into thinking the UNDEAD practice was a regular one, until the lights were to be turned off and everyone would litter in with the cake and party poppers.

Looking at the clock, you realized that his birthday was pretty close, as it was 11:34pm. You didn't realize that time had passed by so quickly, which must have been why your lover was lamenting his sorrows from the lack of attention from you.

Feeling pressure on your legs, you looked up to see that Rei had moved from his spot on the other side of the couch to your side, resting his head on your legs while he laid on his stomach. Luckily with the way you were sitting, the computer screen wasn't in his sights.

You chuckled a bit before closing your computer, offering a brief sorry in your head to Koga who also happened to be on the document with you.

"So now my lover returns to my side?" Rei teased, tracing shapes into your thigh.

"I was technically always by your side, my love." You raised an eyebrow, putting your hands into Rei's thick locks of hair. Brushing them out with your fingers, you did the small knots that had accumulated throughout the day.

Rei sighed out of bliss, feeling the way you scratched his scalp and smoothed down his hair.

"Oioioioi, don't tease me like that. You will hurt this poor vampire's heart." He shook his head, fake wiping a tear from his eye.

You laughed, and Rei could feel the way your body shook while his head rested upon your legs.

Smiling brightly, you pressed a kiss into his forehead. "You know I will always be there for you, Rei." You softly uttered against his forehead.

Rei grinned, before tilting his head up to steal a kiss from your lips.

"And this old man is very thankful for that."

"How thankful?" Your lips moved against his while you whispered.

Rei rose from his spot on your legs, pinning his hands on the sides of your head on the couch's armrest.

"Fuhuhu, let this old man show you how thankful I am, from all of my heart..."

Leaning in, Rei swooped down to press his lips against yours, your lips moving in tangent with his. He freed one of his hands to move it to gently hold your face, his thumb stroking your cheek as he moved to deepen the kiss.

You broke off from the kiss for a breath of air, but that was short lived as Rei once again went in to steal another kiss, another, another, and you tore your head from Rei's onslaught of kisses before he could fully steal your whole breath.

Moving your hand to cover Rei's lips, your chest heaved as you scowled at him.

"We both need to breathe... Rei..." You felt slightly lightheaded from the amount of kisses he had given you.

Rei pouted, burying his face into your neck. You could feel the tips of his fangs slightly poking your skin as he spoke.

"I'm afraid your lips are just too delectable, my dear."

You wrapped your arms around Rei's neck before lightly sighing. Feeling Rei smirk, you moved too late before he moved to once again take over your lips.

Melting into his lips, you tightened your hold on Rei as your stomach fluttered with the way Rei kissed you. He moved his kisses from your lips to your jaw, then to your neck. You felt a shiver throughout your body, brokenly sighing with how warm the air had become.

Rei's body runs cold, but in times like these, you can't help but feel he's like a heater, a light source that you couldn't help but be drawn to.

He always shook his head when you likened him to a star, changing the subject, but you knew that a star will always shine bright even when covered by darkness.

A sharp ring had cried throughout the air, and you realized that it was your alarm you had set for 11:59 to remind you to wish Rei a happy birthday.

You tried to reach for the alarm, breaking off the kiss that Rei captured you in, but you soon realized that Rei's strong arms had you trapped under him.

"My-"

Smooch

"Love, yo-"

Another smooch

"Oh for goodness sak-"

You kept trying to break it off from Rei to shut off the god awful noises that rang from your alarm (you thought you had changed the tune to Bloody Moon Vampire, although it seems it had slipped your mind), but Rei kept stopping you.

Brute forcing your body to turn a complete 180 degrees from Rei, you leaned forward to finally turn off the alarm on your phone. You sighed after turning it off, slightly turning back before your felt a hand on your chin facing you towards Rei, up close.

"My dear, I hope you know I do try to be a patient man, but when I'm with you, I can't help but feel like I become the most inpatient man. Know that your lover may become a beast if you tempt him for too long, hmm?" Rei muttered with narrowed eyes, holding your chin with a firm but gentle hand.

You felt your stomach turn over with butterflies, your mouth gaping widely as you felt a shiver rack through your entire body.

Rei smirked, tilting his head at you. "Well?"

"Well," you glanced at the clock, before shifting your eyes back towards Rei. "Happy birthday, my love."

You grinned from ear to ear, eyes twinkling with mirth as Rei's eyes widened.

Rei let out a chuckle, before softly smiling. "I suppose my years are coming up on me."

You snorted, before finally turning your body to face Rei. Putting your hands on his cheeks, you leaned in with pulling Rei closer.

"Well, I suppose before your years actually start creeping up on you, we better make the most of it, no?"

Pressing your lips against Rei's lips, you felt Rei frozen, but then you could feel the way his lips smiled into yours, before responding by moving his lips with yours.

You buried your hands into the raven's hair, somehow pulling you two closer as the two of your bodies were pressed up against each other.

Rei surprisingly broke off the kiss, gazing into your eyes with a fondness that you couldn't describe.

"I really do love you my dear, more then you will ever know." Rei pressed a kiss into your temple, softly sighing.

You kissed his neck, "I don't know if you will ever know how much I love you, Rei."

Rei smiled, "I suppose that means we need to be with each other for a while to understand our feelings, no?"

You smiled back at him. "I would love that."

"Fuhuhu, I do wonder what you lot have in store for my birthday."

"...Eh!? How do you-!?"

"A vampire always has good ears, my dear, ohohoh.."

"Hah? He already found out?" Koga scowled, before fiddling with one of the balloons.

"I don't know how either.." You trailed off, fiddling with your own balloon.

The rest of UNDEAD and the five eccentrics prepared the room, slighting changing the plan to just surprise Rei as soon as he walks in. You all realized that he could guess some of the plan, so that's why you decided to alter it.

"Well, I suppose he will be slightly surprised at our plan change..?" You questioned.

You felt a buzz against your leg, before realizing that someone was texting you. Pulling out your phone you realized that Kaoru was frantically texting you that Rei was ahead of schedule.

"Ah, wait everyone, Rei is coming!?" Everyone startled a bit, and you were about to open your mouth again before the door suddenly opened.

"Ah, Adonis, Koga, there yo-" The balloon Koga held had slipped out of his hands from being startled, and had been launched, ploppin against Rei's face.

Everyone gaped at the situation, before you quickly shuffled to the front. You raised your hand to countdown from 3.

"Happy birthday, Rei!" All of you said, ignoring what just happened.

Rei chuckled, before bursting out with laughter.

"I suppose you did catch me there with this surprise, fuhuhu."

happy birthday rei!

#macaron's writing #esworks #ensemble stars #ensemble stars x reader #enstars #enstars x reader #rei sakuma #rei sakuma x reader #happy birthday rei sakuma!!!!

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antimony-medusa · 2 months

Text

MCYT on Ao3 - March '24

The state of MCYT on Ao3, just for fun. Yes I do this every month, I like numbers.

There were some very significant changes in the MCYT space with certain people being outed as abusive or predatory, with some people describing the wave of people coming forward as "mcyt's #metoo moment", so I would expect to see that reflected in the statistics. Let's go for it!

Incidentally, I reached the limit for bullet points on Tumblr, so it's time to switch this over to a spreadsheet! Which means I get to do colour coding, fun.

Some Notes:

I didn't see any new fandoms this month, but ocassionally I've missed something. Feel free to let me know if I've missed a fandom!

Fics are still primarily in english, but we have three exceptions with significant spanish fics. Karmaland (751 of 860 are in spanish, from 750 last month), Tortillaland (109 of 115 are in spanish, the same as last month), and QSMP (845 of 8,475 are in spanish, from 827 last month.)

QSMP also shows 47 fics in French, up from 43 last month, and 454 in Brasilian Portugese, up from 452 last month. While I did not check every language this month, I checked on the languages I knew had a fic in QSMP and we see 1 fic in Bahasa Malaysia, 1 fic in Dansk (Danish), 2 fic in Deutsch (German) up from 1 last month, 1 fic in Esperanto, 1 fic in Filipino, 5 works in European Portugese, 2 fics in Polski (Polish), 7 fics in Русский (Russian), 1 fic in Suomi (Finnish), 1 fic in Svenska (Swedish), 1 fic in Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese), and 4 fics in 中文-普通话國語 (Mandarin Chinese, I believe) up from 3 last month. While several 한국어 (Korean) speakers were recently added to the QSMP, there are currently no fics in 한글 (written Korean). The one fic in ASL has been either re-filed or deleted.

In the small and micro-sized fandoms, HBG's atypical increase of 16 fics last month was followed by a decrease of 7 this month. So not sure what happened there but something happened there. The fandom with the greatest increase is New Life, with an increase of 11, followed by My Inner Demons, with an increase of 9.

In the middle sized fandoms, another Aphmau fandom took the flag, with MyStreet showing an increase of 42 fics. That is followed by Minecraft Diaries and Evolution SMP, at 26 and 25 respectively.

In the post-canon big fandoms, 3rd Life was our standout, with an increase of 398 fics (less than last month's 558 or the previous month's record 831. Origins was noteworthy for posting an actual decrease of 30 fics, in contrast to the previous month's increase of 19. Dream SMP was probably the fandom hardest hit by the outing of abusers mentioned at the start, and far from last month's increase of 591, they showed an actual decrease of 801 fics. So a difference in expected fics posted of approximately 1,400 fics.

Dream SMP was actually not the fandom that posted the greatest decrease, as that belongs to Minecraft (Video Game), which saw a decrease of 1,555 fics, a difference in expected fics posted of approximately 1,800 fics. So many fics were deleted that Video Blogging RPF, which showed an increase of 3,513 last month and this time last year had 3,343 fics posted, only showed an increase of 51 fics.

In the currently airing big fandoms, Hermitcraft's increase of 628 did not reach the previous month's 716 or the month before that's 784, but does beat December's 574. QSMP was also, presumably, hit by the deletion wave, as this month's 391 did not reach the previous month's 729. This marks the fifth month of decline for QSMP.

#dsmp #hermitcraft #qsmp #traffic series #mcyt on ao3 #ao3 #fandom stats

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redleavesinthewind · 4 months

Text

elliot's 2023 fic wrap up

2022 version

alright friends it is once again time for me to review the (many) fics i read in the previous year and try to write a more or less concise rec list of my absolute faves (i wish i didn't have to chose but heh i'm not gonna subject anyone to 332 fics in 1 post - also wait only 332 fics? that's like. over 100 less than last year, what the fuck. anyway)

okay now first the part that interests no one but me (yes you may skip this) and that's the numbers part! i'm not making a whole elaborate spreadsheet to then not throw around cool numbers. anyway.

i've read around 4,932k words in 332 fics across 18 fandoms. that is much less than last year, and yeah, i've been generally less productive in 2023 but we don't have to talk about it. at least i have more variety of fandoms this time (let's ignore that it's only 2 more and also that from fandom 13 on there's only 1 fic per fandom)

i started out the year strong with 847k words across 72 fic in february (followed by 753k across 42 fics in january, and 621k words across 63 fics in march). it goes downhill for the rest of the year. eh it wasn't my year so what! 2024 is gonna be more filled with fic reading again!!!

my top 3 fandoms are so entirely unsurprising to me i am almost disappointed in myself. when did i become so predictable. top fandom is young royals with 166 fics! congratulations young royals, you are a very persistent hyperfixation, you didn't peter out after 2 months like i expected. Spot number 2 is taken by avatar the last airbender with 41 fics! giant leap there, but it's also funny because i fell into an atla rabbit hole late 2023 (as i do every few years) and it still got up to 41 fics despite uni not allowing me to read last semester (uni is evil). Same as last year, spn takes third place with 38 fics. speaking of persistent hyperfixations.......... *big sigh*

and that is it the boring part is over let's go to the fun section LET'S REC SOME FIIIIIICCCCSSSSSSS (under the cut)

JANUARY

bet you you'll ... (noraverse) (series) by @gh0sthugs | young royals, wilmon | teen&up | 52k words

a kid fic!! and such a sweet one too! i'm kinda weak for kid fics ngl, and nora is so sweet and wonderful, and the relationship that slowly forms between wille and simon is beautiful and comfortable. this whole series is just such a good time

spreadsheet notes: ah to fall in love with the dilf next door who also happens to be the ex crown prince of the country

A Royal Intervention by AnxiousAnaconda | young royals, wilmon | teen&up | 18k words

erik is being such a dumbass in this one. like, he means well, but he's kinda messing up and pissing people off (understandably). it's nice to get a view on erik that's not portraying him as this perfect guy though, and the fic is actually so much fun to read. and hey, the prime minister of luxembourg gets mentioned, which i was kinda waiting for in yr fic ngl

spreadsheet notes: big sigh... erik you fucking idiot. stop listening to august. also shoutout to xavier bettel apparently (edit: this aged poorly, fuck xavier bettel)

and each slow dusk by @if-fortunate | young royals, wilmon | mature | 49k words

okay. ooookay how do i even begin with this one. ohhh boy. okay. so. world war three. wille gets stuck in bjärstad with simon, many many things happen, it's about finding hope in a horrible situation and trying to live life despite everything falling apart around you. it's incredibly well written and something about it just has me in awe

spreadsheet notes: i don't know what it says about me that this is without a shadow of a doubt the best fic i have ever read in my life

Put Me Back Together and Take My Heart by @notalotgoingonatthisinstant | young royals, wilmon | mature | 50k words

i once again don't know what to say, this one is sooo good. simon is suffering and both wille and i hate it, but... but wille is there for him and ugh, they just... they just can't be apart. a story of reconciliation and healing from both physical and invisible wounds, and of making the right decisions for yourself

spreadsheet notes: ugh. UGH. my guys. MY GUYS. yeah let's go blackmail the queen

Department Six by @thisdiscontentedwinter | teen wolf | gen | 4k words

a fun short one about stiles and danny working for the fbi and being delightfully weird and mysterious

spreadsheet notes: HILARIOUS i'm in love with outsider pov always

FEBRUARY

There Are No Wolves in California by @thisdiscontentedwinter | teen wolf, sterek | gen | 5k words

you know, sometimes you see a fic you know is going to hurt you, and you've never clicked on anything faster. this is definitely one of those fics

spreadsheet notes: let's be wolves today yeah well derek what if i just break down and cry instead

you got my body, i got your body by @prince-simon | young royals, wilmon | explicit | 9k words

this one's technically part of a bigger series (which, definitely read that one too), but i'm highlighting this one cause... damn... this made me feel things... like, gender things... which is really weird cause wille's gender in this is very much different from mine BUT STILL

spreadsheet notes: how almost 9k of pwp gave me so many gender feelings i will never understand

Changing Channels: Queer Premiere by @emeraldcas, @fellshish | spn, deancas | gen | 27k words

this might actually be one of the funniest fics i've ever read. dean and cas are so stupid (affectionately) and all the crossovers are delightful (bonus that i knew all the other shows). everyone go read this it's gonna be the best time

spreadsheet notes: mel and fells have genuinely outdone themselves this is the most hilarious shit i've ever read

Catalyst by @stretchoutfics | young royals | teen&up | 3k words

a backstory for boris! this fic is within a series of other side character ficlets, but this one has a soft spot in my heart

spreadsheet notes: AAAAHHHH HE KNEW ABOUT THE RECKLESS DRIVING BUT DIDN'T BRING IT UP but also... him being a gay man trying to help the queer crown prince navigate his sexuality that's kinda nice actually, like boris understands at least a bit

The most beautiful boy by lovelysarcastic | young royals, wilmon | teen&up | 88k words

there's something incredibly grounding about this fic. the way it develops, the way wille rationalises his thought processes, the way the relationship between wille and simon develops... this fic just kinda sucked me in and spit me out again feeling... content and calm and... it's just... this fic is so beautiful

spreadsheet notes: dude i love this so much??? they're both so stupid??? i love them???

MARCH

All's Fair in Love and Hunting by @badjoices | spn, deancas | mature | 20k words

they're playing gay chicken but also are being incredibly competitive and stupid about it, and i'm just sorry about the shit sam has to witness. so many shenanigans in this fic

spreadsheet notes: they are both so stupid omg

["mi cotufita" started sharing their screen] by @omar-rudeberg | young royals, wilmon | explicit | 60k

so... this is a follow up to one of my favourite fics and it is a delight. very horny but also very sweet? and also for some reason there's porn. fun times! oh, and this fic made me cry. it really has the range

spreadsheet notes: how are they so horny it's so funnyyyyyy, but also if i were wille i could never look linda in the eyes again

A Light To Guide You In The Dark (Warmed By The Fire's Glow) by 80shairmetal | stranger things, harringrove | teen&up | 19k words

this is just... people taking care of each other out of the kindness of their hearts. finding comfort in strangers who become family. growing and helping each other. there's such a beauty to this one

spreadsheet notes: this is just..... comfort

did you see the love in my eyes, oh were you gazing through this disguise? by @tooindecisivetopickaurl | young royals, wilmon | mature | 67k words

fake dating my beloved. they're so in love with each other but they're pretending not to be while pretending... to be? i'm obsessed with them. but they're so respectful with each other and cautious of boundaries and they really are best friends who also happen to be obliviously in love

spreadsheet notes: love a good fake dating au they're so stupid i love them

flash like a setting sun by @playedwright | 911, buddie | explicit | 22k words

because you only realise you're in love with your best friend when you're scared you're losing him. that's the fic. and it's beautiful

spreadsheet notes: oh this is sooooo beautifully written and ugh just <333

Other people's secrets by @sflow-er | young royals, walty & wilmon | mature | 239k words

yooooo hello? so first off this is an outsider pov on wilmon which i am always obsessed with anyways but the focus isn't just on them, this is henry's story. it's a beautiful story about how friendships form and warp and change, how feelings manifest in different ways, how decisions and actions have consequences. it's an incredibly mature take on post-s1, and it's probably my favourite of the year. also ace representation!!!!

spreadsheet notes: ace henry my beloved <33 also love seeing wilmon from an outside perspective! such a good, well thought out fic with lots of healthy comminication <33

APRIL

if i stare too long by @brawlite & @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger | stranger things, harringroveson | explicit | 191k words

i haven't seen st s4 (and probably won't watch it) but that definitely won't stop me from reading harringroveson fic. i mean, who wouldn't look at those three and immediately want to see them together. the way their dynamic is written in this fic is peak, i don't even know what more to say. i also very much trust these authors with billy, and again i wasn't disappointed. there's just something in his head that's intriguing.

spreadsheet notes: this whole fic is such a vibe it makes me feel of hot summer chillin

MAY

Rewrite the Stars (series) by @in-amor-veritas | young royals, wilmon | mature | 137k words

definitely one of the highlights of the year, simon's whole life in new york... those scenes, they just show such a wonderful life simon has built for himself, and his relationship with wille doesn't change it, but he manages to fit in (after, you know, fun rom-com drama shenanigans). also. this is a kid fic. kid fics are my weak spot. rasmus is my new favourite little guy. also shoutout to luis best side character ever

spreadsheet notes: YELLING i love this fic sooo much it is everything

Where The Wind Will Carry Me by @1-life-to-give | young royals, wilmon | teen&up | 49k words

AND THEY WERE ACTORS PLAYING LOVE INTERESTS. do i have to say more? the tension guys the TENSION. also erik's side-plot i'm in love

spreadsheet notes: hopping up and down like a hyperactive chihuahua EN I LOVE THIS

Your love is my turning page (the t4t wilmon as girldads au) (series) by @willesworld | young royals, wilmon | teen&up | 17k words

i know i know another kid fic BUT!!!! t4t wilmon. makes it automatically superior. i'm not even kidding, add trans characters and i will like your fic (that i probably already like a lot) aroun 300000000 times more. but also this series comes for your feelings. it hits

spreadsheet notes: i am weak for t4t wilmon AND them having a biological child there's something so beautiful about it like that could be meeee ; siiimon i need to hug him and i need to hug wille they're gonna get out of this i prommy ; recovery and one step forwards a hundred steps back, but they made it there in the end ; they were so happy :((((

JUNE

A trace of dew by nuncflore | elden ring, this is too complicated | gen | 13k words

very elden ring-esque writing style, wonderful representation of whatever the hell is going on in the lore. hehehehehhe fucked up family ehhehehehe DIVORCE. my friends are so talented :))

spreadsheet notes: CAP I AM EATING YOU

Hanging from the Ceiling by @spicymiilk | spiderverse | teen&up | 6k words

for like. a week after i saw the new spiderverse movie i made miles 42 my entire life. that also meant reading this fic. and damn did this fic hit. i am still thinking about it

spreadsheet notes: i need more miles 42 content he is my favourite guy ever

The Darkest Little Paradise by @yourdemiurge | young royals, wilmon | explicit | 79k words

*holding you at gunpoint* read this fic. read it now, in this moment. you are not gonna regret it. believe me when i say you NEED this fic, you really do. doesn't even matter if you've seen yr or not. you're gonna thank me later

spreadsheet notes: THIS IS INSANE I CAN'T BREATHE MADY WHAT THE FUUUUUCK

JULY

Protected (series) by bastuba | young royals, wilmon | explicit | 69k words

hey do you ever read a fic and you just feel. so incredibly grounded because something about the characters feels grounded? like, they aren't grounded, but they still give off that vibe? idk how to explain this properly but that's this fic. also wille and simon cook together (i haven't read all parts of the series yet btw)

spreadsheet notes: incredibly grounded very mature how is wille like this ; i'd be like wille, always complaining about the heat ; they're soooooo. idiots. getting tattoos for each other ; i too would come out on a podcast about food ; SAFE SEX

AUGUST

The Season of Rebirth by @notalotgoingonatthisinstant | young royals, wilmon | mature | 30k words

part of a series, but i'm picking out this one specifically because it's soooo sweet!!! the title fits the fic so well, like yes it is the season of rebirth, but simon and wille's relationship is also rehashed in a very cool way, this fic is like one giant easter egg, i love it so much!

spreadsheet notes: wille taking the season of rebirth to recreate their early relationship, i am obsessed with him he's such a dumbass romantic

The Upgrade by @groenendaelfic | young royals, wilmon | explicit | 13k words

it's about the moment simon realises who wille is. that's why this fic is here. i mean of course also because it is very good, but mainly because of that moment

spreadsheet notes: the moment simon realised who wille is i am wheezing

Right Where You Left Me by @armandgender | spn, deancas | explicit | 94k words

if you're wondering why this fic is on my 2023 list instead of the 2022 list.... well that's because it took me almost a year to read the last chapter, and in terms of how my spreadsheet works, that makes it a fic i read in 2023. anyway. if you haven't read this fic yet, what are you even still doing here. click on that link right now. you want complex emotional situations? intricacies of ill-advised marriages? you wanna pick through abusive behaviour and encourage infidelity? well you're at the right place! also this has one of my favourite jack characterisations ever. it also made me go on multiple rants

spreadsheet notes: I FINALLY FINISHED IT AAAAHHHH I LOVE THIS FIC THE CABIN THE CATS JACK!!!!!

Alejito y Marimar (series) by th0ughts | red, white, and royal blue | teen&up | 18k words

OBSESSED WITH THIS DYNAMIC YOOOOOO. seriously the friendship between alex and martha is an expansion of the rwrb universe that is much needed, trust me

spreadsheet notes: the friendship i didn't know i needed in my life <333 ; they're just chillin!!!

SEPTEMBER

Change of Address (series) by hearmerory | avatar: the last airbender, zukka | mature | 134k words

okay. oooookay. strap in for this one, it is a lot. emotionally. like yes zuko is autistic, yes yes yeeees, i agree, also azula is treated like an actual person with actual mental issues, she deserves to be treated with care and this author definitely does that! this is the kind of series that makes me want to disappear in it, but it's also the kind of story i need breaks from, because it is so heavy (definitely check the tags for this one). zuko's relationship with sokka is written so thoughtfully and iroh is characterised incredibly and the author even included ursa in a way that didn't undermine everything that happened in the series before she appeared again. i can only recommend this one!

spreadsheet notes (there's lots of parts to the series, so this one is long): hhhh if i were ms jamieson i would have snapped after two days probably ; be nice katara!!!!! he's nervous ; i need to murder ozai ; and i need to murder zhao as well ; iroooohhhhh he should have just. taken the kids with him that first time he noticed something off ; yeah i think there was a reason why iroh never took zuko to the movies ; ozai needs to suffer ; i need to destroy ozai. violently and painfully ; iroh is the best uncle ever, zuko deserves all his kindness ; azula...... you don't have to fight for affection, it's not a competition..... they love you ; iroh should have taken her with him the first time around, she was like. 10, he could have just picked her up or sth ; ..... hakoda you idiot ; IROH BACKSTORY IROH BACKSTORY ; sokka and the plan that changed his life <3333 ; they are so soft with each other ; they all deserve all the therapy and support and yes sokka obviously you have adhd get with the program ; URSA??????? also i am living for sokka and azula's dynamic they are everything ; i don't. i don't understand her. i don't fucking understand her how could she not want her own children. how can she talk about them like that. like she knows them she doesn't know them she LEFT

Every night my teeth are falling out by @sulkybender | avatar: the last airbender, zukka | mature | 9k words

i was in need of some good zuko angst and oooohhh boy was i lucky to find this author. PEAK zuko angst. this fic in particular is very dear to me because it explores how mental illnesses would be handled in a world where there's practically no resources to help. i think we need that more

spreadsheet notes: yes well. how DO you deal with a schizophrenic fire lord in a fantasy world? (you stay with him and support him that is how)

OCTOBER

for years or for hours by @ghostinthelibrarywrites | the witcher, geralt/eskel/jaskier | explicit | 52k words

listennn i love myself some good polyamory fics, and this is the first fic i read for this ship and now i am OBSESSED with them. but this fic in particular.... the concept alone, like. what do you do when you thought the man you love was dead for 800 years, and then when he comes back you have another man you love. the answer is simple. polyamory. the two men you love also love each other. perfect coincidence.

spreadsheet notes: YO the concepts of witchers in modern times alone is sooo cool but adding in everything else? hello yes?

this is a love story by @achillestiel | supernatural, deancas | mature | 3k words

listen, i've never seen fleabag, but that's not the point. this is intriguing and funny, that's the point

spreadsheet notes: fucked up families and you want to fuck the priest hell yeah

The road not taken looks real good now by @stretchoutfics | young royals, wilmon | explicit | 90k words

it's not even the wilmon part i love about this fic (i very much enjoy it of course don't get me wrong) but wille and his kids. like, i don't want to spoil anything but like. wille's interactions with his kids are so important in this fic, and they're written so well. like, emilia is my favourite character in this, i kinda wish there was more with the kids honestly. this fic is definitely a highlight of the year, and to get back to wilmon, i do love how they're portrayed in this fic, how their dynamic plays out, and specifically how certain decisions do not depend on simon

spreadsheet notes: no but. the care put into this story. i can't--

NOVEMBER

Averno (series) by @sulkybender | avatar: the last airbender, zukka | mature | 12k words

a fascinating take on a fire lord zuko that was never part of the gaang

spreadsheet notes: HE JUST DESERVES KINDNESS but also he's a little fucked up WELL NO WONDER GIVE HIM KINDNESS ; i mean.... what makes a monster really ; well then let's get him out of his cell shall we (also hiiiii suki hello <3333)

Half Awake in Our Fake Empire by @hmslusitania | 9-1-1, buddie | teen&up | 34k words

another kid fic!!! but in a different fandom this time!!! seriously, giving buck a child fills so many of my life's needs it's ridiculous

spreadsheet notes: THEY'RE A FAMILY (thank you for giving that man a child)

a soldier (who carries a mighty sword) by @ghostinthelibrarywrites | the witcher, geralt/eskel/jaskier | explicit | 92k words

everything about this fic is wonderful!! the world(kaer morhen!!)building, the developing dynamic between geralt, jask, and eskel, ciri and yenn, the conflict, jask as a teacher!!!! aaahhhhh!

spreadsheet notes: they're my new favourite guyssss this whole fic is so cool, what they've done with kaer morhen <3333

Will We Last the Night by CSHfic & VSfic | avatar: the last airbender, zukka | teen&up | 143k words

this fic asks what if sokka had been stuck with zuko since the end of s1 and delivers a delightful answer. this is the adventures of zuko and sokka (and sometimes iroh) travelling through the earth kingdom. shenanigans ensue

spreadsheet notes: i am obsessed with this i'm just. i know it was only shortly but their life in ba sing se. obsessed

DECEMBER

Grudge Match by @catcas22 | elden ring | gen | 17k words

i'm not entirely sure how to explain this. it sure is an elden ring fic

spreadsheet notes: i don't even know what to say. this is ridiculous and brilliant and stupid and genius all at the same time. hell yeah suburban demigods

Lonely Digging by @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger | stranger things, harringrove | teen&up | 3k words

this is hilarious. go read it to unlock intense life-threatening flirting

spreadsheet notes: best way to flirt billy's doing everything right

***

(quick note: i’ve tried to find everyone’s tumblr handle, but i’m aware that not all the authors have tumblr/have it on their ao3, however if i somehow missed someone, i can go back and rectify that!)

if you’ve made it all the way down here i am giving you a kiss <3

#pigeon coos #fic reading shenanigans #fic rec #ALL THE LOVE TO FIC WRITERS YOU GUYS ARE DOING AMAZING!!!!

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zilabee · 4 months

Text

I listened to the final ep of @anotherkindofmindpod's Fine Tuning, yesterday. I'm so sad it's ended. I loved every.single.second. I don't think I've posted about it at all, but it's only because everyone was already saying it better, and my posts end up in drafts half finished and confused and full of runaway sentences of little import.

I'm really grateful for the whole thing. Grateful the way I was when I watched Understanding Lennon McCartney the first time, like being given a genuine gift of fandom making sense of itself. I don't know. It's just lovely to have. And it's done so well.

When, in the first ep, they casually mentioned that there were going to be ELEVEN episodes I knew it was going to be amazing. Proper genuine "we have a lot to say and we're going to say it all so you don't think we didn't think it through" you know? I love that they didn't start making eleven episodes and then decide that was too many and cut 40% of it out, it's more like they wanted to make twenty episodes and then cut out about 40% of that. Making eleven episodes and then being like 'we didn't even have time to talk about anything that we LIKED about this book' is a real move. A perfect shiny move.

The fact they made a spreadsheet sends me into fits. I love it.

Cards on the table I have not read Tune In properly, I have skimmed and picked at it, and obviously I've seen loads of it quoted on tumblr, but EVERY quote you read from it (and everything he says in interviews) makes it so fucking OBVIOUS that he doesn't understand basic things, I've never been able to face it full on. And the frustration that people (men) can't see how bad it is. So having it put out there like this, bit by bit, oh the joy of it.

And then it's also so much worse than I knew, because I'd never really worked out that he was just MAKING UP QUOTES and mushing them together to say new things, and oh my god the stuff that's NOT in there, is insane. The bit in episode 3 where AKOM quickly list off about five or six really interesting things about Paul's art in his schooldays and then you find out that Tune In didn't even MENTION that he liked to paintklsjdofihoijsodijfohwoisjdf OH MY GOD.

I'm blown away by the work of it, and the scale of it, and how well put together it was. I love the *feel* of it. I love its tone when they let the sarcasm ride high. The voices of "sincere surprise" are just my favourite thing. "Oh, so he mentions that Paul did x and y right?" "Actually, weirdly he doesn't!" "Oh, HOW STRANGE. But does he say he was interested in z???" "Oddly no." I love the sense of giddy anticipation in the intro ep, it must have been killing them to have made so much of it and not be able to talk about it.

I'm so fully aware that all of what they're saying will move into other podcasts, and become things that men sort of talk about as if obviously everyone kind of sees the bias in Tune In, even though they've always talked about it as if it's a great work of truth until now. It kills me softly. And they'll claim it's only POSSIBLE to see that now, ten years later when it's spelled out to them, as if it's aged badly or something, when actually female fandom has been fucked off with Tune In for fucking years. But that's FINE. WHATEVER.

Also glorious have been all the posts people posted around it, and how the conversation grew, and especially the fact that @mythserene had clearly been doing a lot of the same work. Her posts in tandem with the show are so wonderful, and make it even more special, the depth of fandom for the love of fandom <3333333

#akom #<33333

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annabelle--cane · 7 months

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hello, I would love to hear your magnus protocol theories if you have any?

every single one of the following theories are exactly as serious as each other, none of these are jokes at all:

the arg end page on the oiar site saying "all of that was 100% a totally fake training exercise so destroy any evidence you kept or be charged with treason" is such a massive lie <3

the oiar is the new seat of power for the alternate-universe-sorta-beholding. the magnus institute burned down and it simply didn't matter to the dread powers, they just jumped ship and let all their human servants die, which would tie-in to the pitch of protocol being more about systems whereas archives was about personal choices. a single person did manage to burn down the torment nexus institute but it simply didn't matter in the grand scheme of things.

lena kelley is alternate jonah magnus's current host

archives 'verse einsamernarr was the one who leaked those statements in 1999 mentioned in mag 68. the timelines don't quite line up, but several time stamps from the usenet forum look rather, shall I say, like they've been affected by exposure to a massive hole in reality that links to a different slightly out of sync universe.

the magnus institute was burned down by a cataclysmically angry mother who realized the extra curricular classes her kid went to was giving them "haunted by ghosts" disease.

gwendolyn bouchard is alternate jonah magnus's current host

hokay one of the arg documents pulled from a floppy disc found at an irl event had a spreadsheet in it written in german with what looks to me like dates and locations of statements (or maybe incident reports...?). I think this might have some clues about the protocol 'verse fear taxonomy, as the notes section of uncorrupted rows seem to have explanations for the events. most of them are "cats lol," but some labels ring bells for me, like "war people / warriors" (slaughter) and "avoid" (lonely), and some don't but are still spooky. "ink" comes up several times, "never again" and "unhappy child" once each. one that took place at a somerset theme park is noted with "mr b," so clearly bonzo himself is also an entity of fear.

lady mowbray is alternate jonah magnus's current host

she's also just a front for funneling money to the great bonzo

I really think that under no circumstances are we going to definitively know what happened to jon and martin from the archives 'verse, but we could definitely see what their alternate selves are up to in this timeline. I've got nothing to back this up but I'd like to see them being evil and doing evil laughs and enacting evil actions.

I shall be real, I have no idea what the deal will be with celia ripley, I just know that it's significant that she's called celia when her alternate self chose that name AND saw a fire ghost woman. here's how agnes montag--[I am shot]

bonzo is alternate jonah magnus's current host

#tmagp #pinkelotjeart #answered

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wannab-urs · 4 months

Text

The Spreadsheet Digest | Vol 29

Howdy folks!

This is the final Spreadsheet Digest of 2023! I started the spreadsheet back in May as a way for me to keep up with everything I read. Basically, I was having trouble finding fics I had read so I could reread them or I was getting two chapters into a new series before realizing I'd already read it. So I did what I do and I made a spreadsheet about it. Then I felt like other people might benefit from a searchable list of fics. Then, and I don't know why, I thought people might want to know what I thought about the stuff I was reading. And here we are - 29 volumes and 34 weeks later.

Sorry for long intro! This week I have 16 fics for you (Frankie, Joel, Max Phillips, Javi P, Ezra, Dieter, Dave York, and Jack/Whiskey). Summaries and Tags provided by the author where applicable - sometimes I filled in some stuff.

You can find my masterlist here and all my fic recs here

Recs under the Pedro!

My Way - Frankie one shot by @goodwithcheese

Summary: Frankie's working on his truck... you interrupt him Tags: PIV Sex, Frankie uses his words, aka "you know he talks you through it," frankie is bossy Thoughts: if he uhhh "uses his words" this much in the series this is technically set in, I do believe I'll be reading that. This was HOT. Like absurdly hot. Lemme be you car girl, Frankie

Cocoon - Joel series by @secretelephanttattoo

Summary: A short ode to Joel's coat. / a bath with Joel Tags: Angst and intimacy. 1 reference to blood and allusion to canon typical violence (nothing is described) Thoughts: God i love little intimate moments like this... wrapping yourself up in Joel's coat, washing the bad day out of his curls... I am SICK! Someone let me hold this man, please.

I'll Leave a Light On For You - Max Phillips one shot by @oonajaeadira

Summary: Max has reservations when it comes to love, and for very good reasons. Tags: Angst. Character death. Allusions to the atrocities of war and its lasting effects. Max is a vampire. Traumatic soul memory. Me assuming I know anything about French culture of the 1930s. Thoughts: This is beautiful. Just absolutely stunning. I have a fascination with the concept of past lives, and I adore the way it's written about it here. There are some really interesting takes on it here with Max being a vampire. Also, side note, this fic made me cry. It's that soft angst that you don't expect to make you sob, but holy shit. When it hit (you'll know it when you read it) it hit. I was devastated. And then because it's adira and "we do soft here" it ends sweet.

Once in a Blue Moon - Dieter one shot by @whatsnewalycat

Summary: You're the only person working when a Christmas blizzard rolls into town and snows you in with a notoriously difficult guest, Dieter Bravo. Tags: one shot, slight dub con elements (power imbalance, isolation, alcohol) although both parties are enthusiastically consenting, hotel guest x hotel staff, blizzard, Minnesota because that’s my best friend, dieter generally being an ‘if you give a mouse a cookie’ ass bitch, kinda enemies to lovers???, Christmas, loneliness, palm reading, food and eating, cannabis, conspiracy theory mention, fluuuuuufffff, smut, dirty talk, a dash of conflict, painting stuff, power outage, poverty mention Thoughts: Aly has this way of writing Dieter that is like she knows him in real life. He feels so personal and real to me in her stories. I think I say this every time I talk about her fics, but my Dieter would not exist without hers. Anyway -- this fic is wonderful. Dieter has all that silly druggie boy charm he always has, there's a really interesting inclusion of him having PTSD from working on the movie from The Bubble and a really interesting way that he's dealing with it. It's got perfect vibes for us christmas haters too. I loved this so much.

Jingle Balls / Dashing through the ho - Frankie series by @idolatrybarbie

Summary: Santa Frankie porn... that's it. That's the fic Tags: santa kink???, cockwarming, cum, like so much cum, unprotected vaginal sex, unethical use of a mall Santa Village, semi-public sex, dirty talk and pet names, mentions of free use. / santa kink again, free use, spreader bar, creampie, come eating, facefucking, throatpie, anal sex, degradation, cum, pet names (honey, little girl, sweet girl, baby), praise, CUM AGAIN GUYS LIKE IDK WHAT HAPPENED HERE. Thoughts: This is mostly my fault and I refuse to apologize for it

Galletita - Javi P one shot by @gasolinerainbowpuddles

Summary: Your sister and brother-in-law have enlisted your help with their small business while they await the birth of their first baby. You help with the cafe and find yourself face to face with a new customer whose appetite might have met its match in you. Tags: big boi Javi P is hungry and a little cranky, you like to bake and Javi likes to eat, belly kink, feeding kink, probably bad Spanish, we’re playing fast and loose with timelines, canon, and everything in general, so just forget about timey wimey boo boo wah wah and enjoy the story lmao Thoughts: I do, in fact, need a big boy

Devour - Ezra one shot by @frannyzooey

Summary: Falling for Ezra on the Green Tags: harvesting violence, mentions of gore and blood, mentions of cannibalism, love as consumption and all the visuals that come with it, so much fucking and filth and ass play and cum eating it isn’t funny Thoughts: It was a gift for me, so I really probably should not be so amazed by how much I love this fic. But oh my god, dude. Love as consumption, freak nasty smut, Ezra being Ezra, bi!Ez, the Din/Ez hints (I'd like to know more about that), it's all perfect. I will never stop being obsessed with this

Tear You Apart - Dieter one shot by @psychedelic-ink

Summary: it's the 70s and your friend invites you to an underground club where one of your favorite musicians is playing: dieter bravo. Tags: innocence kink, mild corruption kink, backstage sex, piv, dirty talk, weed, oral + handjob (male receiving)obsessed with rockstar Dieter. Thoughts: I'm surprised I haven't seen more rockstar Dieter. This was hot, filthy, and just... in the words of the man himself perfect.

One Man Show - Dieter one shot by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

Summary: Dieter gets himself off! Tags: male masturbation, use of sex toys, anal fingering, butt plug, sex tape??? i guess Thoughts: I'm loving this solo session concept so much. Dieter filming himself!!! for no reason!!! is so hot. Everything about this is so fucking hot. I want him to send me that video...

I am a nightmare, you are a miracle - Joel series by @party-hearses

Summary: After your two year relationship with Tommy Miller ends, Joel takes you in — and it’s home like you’ve never quite known before. Tags: slow burn, explicit (eventual) smut, language, infidelity, alcohol, age difference, soft!joel, no cordyceps outbreak, sarah doesn’t exist (sorry), tommy stans don’t come for me. Thoughts: I have been very intentionally not reading WIPs and waiting for them to be finished, but I fucked up. I was scrolling the dash and frannyzooey recc'd this and it caught my eye and I just didn't even check if it was finished. But I regret nothing. Ch 4 is coming soon, I'm manifesting it. I fucking love Joel in this and I'm super intrigued by reader's uhhhh mommy issues and the way that those manifest.

MASTERLIST BINGE INCOMING | @brandyllyn

To sell your love for peace - Javi P series by @brandyllyn

Summary: You are Javier’s newest informant. You’re not his usual type but he’s willing to make an exception. More than one. Tags: smut, sex work, canon typical violence, javi being a moron Thoughts: I adore a lovers to idiots to lovers story... and man is Javi an idiot. The characterization of Javi here is perfect. Protective!Javi is very canon and I love seeing it in fic. Also, I don't normally go for miscommunication tropes (they tend to annoy me) but this was perfect. I loved every second of this story.

The Serpent Under It - Dave York one shot by brandyllyn

Summary: Dave is very good at his job Tags: Canon typical violence. kinda dark yo, soulmate AU Thoughts: I don't typically read soulmate AUs, but I actually read several of brandyllyn's this week. They're very different from the normal trope. This one broke my heart and it's less than 800 words.

To perish twice - Javi P series by brandyllyn

Summary: You can feel when your soulmate comes. Tags: smut, soulmate AU, Javi being an idiot, male masturbation, piv sex Thoughts: This is what I mean... you can feel when your soulmate has a fuckin orgasm??? What a concept. This was really hot, kind of funny, and had just the right amount of angst.

Cross My Heart - Ezra one shot by brandyllyn

Summary: While waiting at a clinic for the hope of a prosthetic arm, Ezra meets a woman who will change his life Tags: Talk of self harm / suicide but no one does it, discussion of medical procedures and prostheses, some use of ability based slurs by Ezra and others, canon typical violence Thoughts: We love a man who will threaten to murder someone's entire family for you... no seriously. I absolutely love Ezra's characterization here and I love the FMC's story AHHH. It's just a very sweet story... with a little Ezra flair.

Into the Shade - Ezra series by brandyllyn

Summary: Why would anyone fake having a soulmate? Tags: Ezra being Ezra, con man!ezra, soulmate AU, smut, Ezra x OFC smut, Ezra x reader is in there though. Thoughts: Yet again, the typical soulmate concept has been turned on its head here, and I love it. I also adore the flores animae - the particular soulmate mechanic in this fic. It's really interesting!

Dreams are Sweet Until They're Not - Jack Daniels series by brandyllyn

Summary: A crimson rose could only mean one thing. Tags: soulmates au, Jack being a slut, angst, smut, happy ending Thoughts: Okay last soulmates AU on the list, sorry. I went a little nuts. They're just so good. The ending of this one was so sweet, dude.

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My fics this week:

Something Sweet - Javi p x reader - You’re new to the team in Colombia and all alone on your birthday. Your partner, Javier Peña, decides to do something sweet for you. (fluff, smut)

Under Your Skin - jack daniels x javi p x reader - You’ve worked on Chucho’s ranch since you were 15 years old, grew up with Javi, loved Javi… He comes back after nearly 20 years to find you hooking up with a certain former secret agent. He’s jealous, for sure, but of who? (smut)

in the a.m. - javi p x reader - Between sleeping with informants and getting in bed with Los Pepes in the fight to bring down Escobar, Javier Peña also finds time to be with you. Wrestling with crippling self hatred, Javi tries and fails to keep his blood stained hands off of you. Based on some of my favorite Arctic Monkeys songs (smut, angst)

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Happy Reading!

#fic recs #the spreadsheet digest #fanfiction recommendations #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro fics #pedro pascal character fanfiction

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