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#dailydoseofdaisyrose
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I am learning how to find peace in the simplicity of daily life; how to be content with the natural flow of human existence. everything Is fleeting, from experiences to feelings and even the people in our lives. With this understanding I find it easier to slow down and really appreciate the little things that I encounter on a daily basis.
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Beauty
What is the definition of beauty? Why must we all attempt to conform to a standard that is objective when beauty within itself is forever subjective.
I have always mentally struggled with the idea of beauty, I love beautiful things and they hold a place in my heart and mind but when it comes to people why is it that this idea has to be defined as one specific thing? I logically know that beauty is not what society says it is but somewhere in the back of my mind I find myself comparing, judging, and subconsciously trying to morph myself into a form of beauty that others can digest. I cannot digest it. I cannot allow myself to change my own beauty to fit someone else's definition. With that notion in mind, I stand in a weird secluded place of confusion because after years and conditioning from the media and society, what is my own idea of beauty?
I see beauty as fleeting, nothing truly beautiful will last forever. Perhaps art and photographs can but is that beauty? or is that the capture of beautiful things? Is beauty found in the art itself or the concept that someone created something from nothing? If the latter was true then would us as humans be considered beautiful, not by our physical appearance but because we are creating our lives as we go, creating our identities and beliefs.
It is a hard topic to ponder, the idea of beauty. I say that because I find it easy to find beauty in the world around me but lack the ability to see it within myself. Is it important to see beauty in one's own self? If so, what is the benefit in doing that? why do we put beauty on a pedestal, beautiful things are automatically better, but why? perhaps conventionally 'ugly' things are more beneficial to society than beauty. When humans intake beauty, we gain some form of dopamine, we associate some form of positivity to it and never question anything beyond this 'good' feeling we gain from the beauty around us. We mindlessly accept beauty as a birthright, no questions or thoughts beyond what we see just acceptance and appreciation. However, when we see the opposite of beauty we feel deeply, whether it be feelings of unease, disgust, or pure dislike, we are able to associate some form of negative feeling towards it. Those 'negative' feelings we experience when faced with conventionally ugly things always carry so much weight, they are filled with questions and ideas we should unpack. It is easier to mindlessly accept beauty than to question the weight of the 'ugly', and that is exactly what we, we,humans, do; we search for beauty and reject anything less and flow throughout life with ease.
I believe that one's love for beauty stems from the love they have within themselves, and the hatred for ugly is also from the hatred of their own ugly. We crave the beauty that the world offers because it affirms the beauty we see within ourselves, yet we dismiss the ugly because It also affirm the ugly inside one's self that they are not ready to face. Hence the reasoning that beauty is subjective, we are all unique and view the world as such, intaking and rejecting what we deem fit. This is just a reflection of one's self image.
So, where does that leave us on the idea of beauty? Yes it is nice to have and experience, yet we should not place so much power in beauty for it is simply a luxury we should consume in moderation. The true power is in the conventionally ugly things, it is those things that force us to look within and gain a deeper understanding on ourselves and our minds. Beauty and Ugly are two ends on the same stick and balance is required to maintain a sustainable life, we must not stress about beauty and achieving such a title for it is only one end to a whole. We are all beautiful and equally ugly, whatever your story may be, it is important to not have surface level titles dictate ones state of mind.
Beauty cannot be defined as one description, it cannot be created or destroyed. It is a form of energy that we give and receive, it is an enegitical exchange that is happening all around us at every second the day. The birth can be ugly and the death can be beautiful, for it is all in the eyes of the beholder.
I challenge myself now to question the beauty and mindlessly accept the ugly and see what effect it has on my mental.
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Life
I sometimes forget that I am living life; I do not know how to accurately explain that statement but i will try my best to elaborate. I get so carried away focusing on the minor things such as money, work, school etc that I forget to sit back and smell the roses, to really consider the greater meaning to all the things I am working towards. I forget that it is not about the end goal but the joys I find in the pursuit of my dreams. I plant so many weeds of anxiety and stress in my garden of life that I forget to tend to my other beautiful flowers and its during random times that I realize what I am doing. It is hard having to navigate life especially trying to unlearn so many programs in my brain that have become my default, not only unlearning my own but having grace towards others as they learn and grow. I find that in my life some of the people I have a hard time having grace toward is family, the people I spend the most time with and understand probably more than anyone else. there is, in my opinion, a bit of humour to think that I can easily support and sympathize with celebrities and people who in retrospect I genuinely do not know, but when it comes to the people I grew up with I hold so much bitterness, judgement, apathy for. I do not like the feeling that comes with that realization but it is a feeling I have to sit with and understand in order to rise and become better. I have so much love for my family, no matter what I know at the end of the day I have their backs but somehow in the mix I still contain so much judgement.
I am young, a beginner in this game of life and I am learning the rules, how to play the game and I can say right now she is quite complex. honestly I do no like the metaphor that life is comparable to a game because that create the energy that there is a form of competition, a race like environment. I do believe that everything is energy and a saying so simple that is used worldwide subconsciously creates this stigma surrounding life. I believe life should be like a garden, it has the potential to be beautiful and safe, a space that is uniquely your own but it requires work. Every garden will be different, the geographical regions yield different plants due to its environment, personal preference to which flower you want to plant. inevitable there will be obstacles such as invasive species and bugs, animals trying to eat your fruit but no matter what the issues may be there is always a way around it, you cannot have a lovely garden without the work of a dedicated grander. I must attend to my garden and even when there's season of hash winters that hinder the beauty of my space I hold peace in knowing there is the promise of spring. although I do not know all the ins and outs of life I do like to believe that there is good, that this life is not made to make us suffer.
I am young but I am learning that life does not have to be just one way, I can create my own garden with all the lilies, and chrysanthemums that my heart desires. I do not have to live in the box that society says I must be in, I can do what my heart is leading my to do. Now here comes the fun part, how do you navigate this path your heart is screaming at you to follow while maintaining the pressure of society that fills our brains with how things should be. I find it ways come back to a duality, at least for me, Heart vs. Brain.
My heart wants freedom, excitement and happiness whereas my brain, who understands the desires of the heart, focuses on the restraint, struggle and harsh ships that we face. I do not know where the middle ground is for my heart and brain but I do know that it is not a game I want to play when it comes to my life. I value both my heart and brain to gamble with them freely, but rather I want to create a life that is beautiful and secure, a garden, where my heart and brain can coexist comfortably and grow so I can sit and reap the benefits of the work I have put into crafting my garden.
I know this may not make sense and I might just sound like I am all over the place but in my head it makes sense. I forget that I am living life; sunsets, the stars and the moon, hearing the laughs of strangers and the random animals I encounter on a daily basis. I forget that we are a rock floating in space with no destination, simply travelling forwards in a vacuum of time. I forget that I am human with feelings and experiences that are real and valid that do not need any form of explanation to justify, because they are mine and I am real and valid. I am caught up in the 'game' of tricks and rules that we learn to help us win the prize of freedom, when the whole time we are free. Free to laugh and cry and express our truths just as the earth expresses her weather without hesitation. We are free to love and care for everything and anything without the expectation of returns. We are free to live and see life through the good rather than stress about the bad. Life will always present situations and experiences that make us question the meaning of it all but in the end we are free to make the final choice.
With that I leave with a question, what will I chose today?
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