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#couldnt eat for 3 months
oifaaa · 1 year
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I just saw ur post about how you draw Dick with braces to indicate he is 15-19 years old, and how that was prime discowing era and????? I know NOTHING about the comics but Discowing was THAT young?????? Oh god I've been mocking it so much but rememering how I dressed at that age I gotta give him props for making a choice but oh my god that threw me into a little crisis (love your art btw, very cute)
Ohhh no I've misguided you a bit I fudge with dicks age a bit bc I personally think it makes more senses time line wise that dick would become Nightwing at 16/17 but canonically Dick became Nightwing at about 18/19 which tbh I personally still think the outfit makes sense at that age I've never known an 19 year old with much sense in them it's prime "I'm adult now" where you don't realise there's still a lot of stuff you don't realise and your about to make some of the worst choices of your whole life in the span of 12 months
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kafkaguy · 4 months
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character wrapped 2023 💥
tagged by @davidtennantpussytulpa ^-^ i didn't know how many to do so i copied tara and did top 10. i know the severance guys are Four Of Them but i can't separate them theyre all equally important to me
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will graham (hannibal), em haywood (nope), aziraphale (good omens), mark & dylan & helly & irving (severance), hawkeye pierce (mash), martha jones (doctor who), ivan karamazov (the brothers karamazov), kim kitsuragi (disco elysium), stewy hosseini (succession), ruescott melshi (andor/rogue one)
i will tag... @fagician @britomart @libraryfag @roadwhores @majorbaby @globuspolski @hadleyfraserfaggot @tenderscience if u want to ^-^
#and now i will explain them all in detail#cos i started watching hannibal back in like. january or february and will immediately set up camp in my head and started to settle there#*I* pay rent to *HIM*. he lives there permanently. sweating and monologuing constantly#em was not only the character of 2022 but also of 2023 and of 2024 and the rest of the decade and all decades to come#she had such an impact on me keke palmer's performance will live with me forever and i love nope so fucking much#i almost didnt include her because nope was more of a last year obsession. but she lives on#aziraphale.........no comment#severance.......i love them all so much and at first i wanted just irving and then just helly and then i realise i cried over mark this week#and then i realised i couldnt possibly leave out dylan when hes probably my favourite character. so then i settled for all of them#hawkeye is my fucking wife. enough said#martha... well i knew i had to have a doctor who character. i thought maybe the doctor but then i thought their companions mean more to me#sometimes at least. i did have a fourteen icon for a while but then i was like but Donna..... and then i thought. well#these past few months at least martha jones has been eating away at my heart. i go batshit insane when i think about her#her impact. her grace. her power. so she had to go on the list.it was a toss up between her and donna for sure though#then i figured i had to include a karamazov since reading that book took up half of my year. and ivan was my favourite of the 3. so <3#kim goes without saying. literally nothing to be said hes the character Of All Time. to me#stewy also goes without saying ive had so many Stewy Save Me moments since the beginning of season 4 all the way to the end of the year#i miss him every day. he is the moment. i wish there was more of him all the time#and the last one is a bit of a wildcard cos all my insanity abt melshi has been on my andor sideblog.#but rest assured ive been thoroughly Not Normal about him. he literally side appears in 4 episodes and has 11 total minutes onscreen#but i love him. so much. and hes occupied most of my thoughts since september. once again his impact his power his grace. his homosexuality#enough said. that's all. thanks for reading. this was a great year for autism and madness#tag game#🍪
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seariii · 2 months
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alr ate something... probably not a proper meal, but its still a win on my book
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todayisafridaynight · 6 months
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I don't wanna laugh at your expense but also KIND OF a funny series of events😭😭😭here's to recouping that $20...
Speaking of Ryuji... I ended up going through like 60 fucking reviews (WILL throw up if I have to read even one more) and while I'm gonna hold my tongue on all that for now, I still can't quite tell if the Ryuji thing is main story or a substory or a substory that's needed to progress... that said, apparently there are a bunch of fights with fakes that feature flashbacks, including a fake Kiryu and a fake Nishiki? Weirdly the flashbacks make me kind of wish there was a fake Mine since I'm not sure there's gonna be anything all that deep with the style change mechanic in Infinite Wealth
it can get even worse Watch This the exam i thought i was gonna have wednesday was today :))))))))))) when i say i had to fight every urge to just get up and start flipping desks :))))))
fake kiryu AND fake nishiki ???? wild....... we finally getting a boss rush mode since like... y3 omg....
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orcelito · 10 months
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Honestly hate how hard it is to start writing again when you've gone too long without it. Like for fuck's sake man Why's shit gotta be like this
#speculation nation#daydreaming of the early discacc days when i wrote 70k words in 3 weeks. those were the days...#im just... so tired and wrung out and everything is so fucking hard#im barely even Doing anything besides working. my apartment is in horrible shape rn.#what is it about grief that makes life so hard to live man. you lose a cornerstone to your life and suddenly everything is in shambles#and i know he wouldnt have wanted this for me. for me to be Barely functioning bc my brain has been so bad in response#im alive im going to work im feeding myself and showering every day#but i havent been doing the dishes i havent taken out the trash theres Stuff all over my floors and cat messes i havent cleaned#and i dont have the energy for any of it. i get home i eat and then i climb into bed. rinse and repeat.#im just... tired. im so very tired.#i keep wanting to turn to my hobbies to cope with things but it's so fucking hard to stick to#constantly oscillating between manic moods where i think i can finally start moving on (but i dont have the focus to do writing)#and depressive moods where Good Fuckin Luck doing anything besides laying in bed#if you couldnt tell im in the second boat right now. in bed as we speak. and so i shall remain until it's time to go to work#at least ive been going to the woods almost every chance i get. it hasnt given me the power to write but it's been good for me i think#get out of the apartment. experience nature. pick up a snail. you know how it goes.#i kinda feel bad for entering a fandom and trying to dig out a place for myself and Kind Of succeeding#i have a good handful of followers. people who wanna see more of my analysis and fanfic#but i havent posted anything significant in like a month bc i have belonged to the void. all month.#losing family will do that to a person i guess. doesnt stop me from being frustrated though.#negative/
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utilizing all of my willpower in a daunting battle against The Fixations just to get basic household tasks done, i am very brave 
#currently in a 'pace around my house for 3 hours staright talking to myself making up character scenarios in my head' phase#which is good because often that is literally how I write and get writing ideas like things start as concepts#and are only fleshed out once I spend hours talking to myself in different voices trying out dialogue and noting down the words#and situations that are the most interesting out of my daydream walkabout freakshow improv acting session but#this is BAD actually when I have 800 other things to do#I couldnt even eat dinner I just wanted to go in the other room and walk around talking to myself#which just happens#I think it's part of the natural cycle of my creativity or what the hell ever like I just.. get Like That#once every few months I become obsessively fixated on wanting to spend all of my time talking to myself like.. idk#maybe just as a way of processing ideas and stuff that have been floating around in my head for a while or somehting#then after a week or so of constantly having to fight the urge to spend all day talking to myself it's like my brain has gotten it out of#its system and I can function again#but for those few days lol#yesterday I made free time to sit and watch a show that I like and I was literally like.. no... I cant even get into the show I dont#care about this.. I would rather pace the living room and act out imaginary people#Which I know some people daydream about exisitng media characters or like their ships or something like this explicitly is not that#it's like... not even anyone in specific. original characters but not even my pre-established cast of exisitng characters#from the various things I'm writing. I just mean I literally walk around having random interactions#Like I'm playing DnD and I'm the DM and also all of the players hiknjk#but also I'm up walking around acting everything out physically and speaking so its maybe more like LARPing#but everything is just random on the spot. like just testing things out. what if I were these 5 random people off the top of my head#in this random scenario off the top of my head. is that anything? huh? then I debate with myself if it is or not#also one of those aituations where having someone spying on you would be more funny than creepy like.. * throws a punch* *also falls on the#ground because I am both the puncher and the person getting punched* *quickly rises and dashes across the room bevause I'm also a third pers#on who's just a witness* * eating a piece of toast while frantically emoting towards a blank spot on the wall#* etc. and so on and so on gybjh#also sadly yes I have super aphantasia I cannot see shit in my head this is probably why I have to physically act out all imagined#scenarios instead of just visualizing them. rip to people who can silently zone out lost in their imaginations but I'm different (WORSE)#ANYWAY I have a ton of projects right now like a game being finished and the giant worldbuilding videos and costumes and all of this stuff#bad timing to get sucked into the vortex of one of my many evil wizard afflictions that manifests once every few months
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hearties-circus · 1 year
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I!! Hate!! Random!! Hunger spikes!!!
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entropy-sea-system · 1 year
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put diclofenac ointment on my gums bc they hurt (deposits form every few months and my gums are already retracted so. orofacial issues go brr)/it hasn't helped much but. ugh yeah my teeth r probably 'body horror' to some bc of how retracted the gums are...
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kethabali · 9 months
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omg this is the first time a summer internship turned into something longer i never thought it would happen to me because my summer jobs are always busy work types but this time its at a nonprofit that does political advocacy which is what i'm studying and working on in school so it actually matches my ~career~ so idk but i still thought it would just end in august because i wasn't giving like my 100% maybe 75-85%.. but yeah i'm surprised they want me to continue until december.. that means i'll have regular income for like 4 months that hasn't happened since.. honestly i don't think that has ever happened i'm always living off savings from doing odd jobs here and there for a month or 2 so this is exciting and with all the financial aid disbursements and the summer internship income plus my fellowship fundings i will actually save up a shit ton of money and i won't have to worry about running out anymore ive been worrying about that for a whole ass year ever since i had to pay for this stupid apartment and i rented the airbnb to get away from my mom.. i mean it was worth it and its good that i have this apartment now but ive been seriously stressed about money for the past year so this is a really big relief that in a few weeks i won't have to worry anymore i feel like 5 times lighter now like idk i feel so much more relaxed maybe now i can stop spending so much money on weed
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vote2 · 1 year
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ahhh summer class choices open 8 am tmr.
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So ive gotten canker sores for...as long as I can remember
Like I was YOUNG when I first started getting them
But for a good 10 years I've barely had them. I've only had a couple since middle school and they were caused by my braces
But for some fuckin reason they've started back up again. And I was talking about it with my parents and my dad was confusing them with cold sores. And when I corrected him he asked if canker sores have a genetic component since not everyone gets them but if a family member gets them you might too
Which i didnt know
So I looked it up
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And while they don't know 100%, they do believe there is a genetic component
But then I was looking through some other sources and came across this
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Ik it says "most common" so not everyones gonna fit in that
But goddamn
TEN? There's people who don't start getting canker sores til they're between 10 and 19????? Lucky bastards
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hannieehaee · 5 months
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18+ / mdi
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content: loser!chan, virgin!chan, sub!chan, afab reader, smut, dry humping, unprotected sex, penetrative sex, etc.
part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4
wc: 1943
a/n: upon absolutely no demand whatsoever, loser!chan makes a comeback
masterlist
loser!chan who feels like he's about to cum his pants at the sight before him, laying on your bed and mouth agape as his eyes are unable to remove themselves from your figure.
it was like you wanted to kill him. it was already bad enough that you jumped him every single time he crossed the door to your apartment throughout the entirety of the bio project you'd been working on for the past month (his first ever b, a feat due to his lack of ability to concentrate whenever you were sitting in front of him). now, even after the project was done, you kept seeking him out, always giving him insane pleasure with the barest of touches. it was like you got off at the thought of chan cumming with your most minimal effort.
chan couldn't complain, really. he was absolutely obsessed with you. thoughts of you plagued his mind day and night. he couldnt concentrate at school, always looking forward to any time you'd send him a text along the lines of 'miss u channie :c come see me?' you had him at the palm of your hand, and he loved it so bad.
today, you had pulled a new one on him. the two of you arrived at your room, deciding to settle on a movie (that's right! he moved past study buddy to, uh, whatever it was that your relationship was by now). you put on the movie, excusing yourself to go to your restroom really quick. he didnt think too much of it, simply settling on your bed and eating some of the popcorn you had prepared. he had less of a hard time relaxing around you now. it'd been two months since that first time you'd made him cum in his pants when be came over to your place for the first time. now he was able to hold conversations with you, but was still extremely shy when it came to any sexual encounter with you.
his thoughts were unable to progress past that the moment he heard you clear your throat, signaling your return to your room.
holy shit.
the sight before him was one he had only ever pictured in his most intense wet dreams about you (which happened more often that he was willing to admit). you were wearing objectively the prettiest thing he'd ever seen. it was a cute pink lacy set. it was almost completely see-through and with cute little flowers embroidered onto it. it was adorable, but you werent. you were the sexiest thing he had ever seen. he couldve sworn his dick stood right up just at the sight, already leaking with arousal.
"do you like it, channie?", you purred as you crawled on the bed, not bothering with the mess you created upon pushing off the snacks out of your way.
your eyes carried a lust chan had never seen. he felt like prey, and that excited him like crazy.
"y-you .. fuck ..."
"yeah, channie? tell me," you now sat atop his form, which had been him sitting cross-legged on your bed. his hands immediately went to your hips, making you push yourself even closer to him, "tell me what you think. is it pretty? do i look pretty for you, channie?"
he nodded enthusiastically, "yes. you look so ... fuck, so beautiful ... you're perfect."
"aw, thank you, baby. you're so sweet," you had begun pulling off his clothes the moment you sat on him, somehow managing to even get his pants off despite the awkward position (with his help, of course). letting you undress him was second nature to him by now. his body just moved in place to allow you access to his almost completely bare body.
he felt goosebumps form at the way you softly ran your hands throughout the entirety of his skin.
"channie ..."
"yeah?", his eyes couldnt help but stay glued to yours, wide and waiting for whatever command you had for him. he'd do anything you wanted. you were so good and pretty, all for him. it was the least he could do.
"want you ... want you so bad, channie ..." your hips were lightly grinding against his, probably out of second nature by now.
"y-you can have me. i'll give you anything," his hands were running up and down your body, loving how you leaned against his touch.
"anything?"
"yes."
"can i have you, channie? can i ... can i sit on you? fuck. ive been thinking about it nonstop ... just want you so bad, please, channie. can i?"
oh, god. he wasnt going to make it. you were begging for him? all while he was willing to give you anything you wanted. there was no reason to beg, but it was making him lose his mind. the thought of you finally wrapping around him made him moan out loud, digging his head into your neck as his hips instinctively humped against yours.
"baby ... can i? please, please, i'll do anything."
you wanted him dead. there was no other explanation. he was already crying out against your chest, nodding like crazy as he kissed at your skin. he eventually pulled away to look into your eyes, with his own glassy at the insane lust clouding over him.
"yes ... please .. anything. i'll give you anything, just-"
you interrupted him with a kiss, shoving your tongue in his mouth immediately as you pushed him down to lay on his back.
"oh, channie. ive wanted you for so long, you have no idea. i ... can i have it raw, baby? please! just ... ill let you pull out, i promise. im on birth control too. ill take plan b. i dont care. anything, just please, channie ..." you licked at his moaning mouth throughout your entire plea, knowing how much it clouded his mind when you played with his tongue.
he cried against you, begging for you to do whatever you wanted to him. nothing was off-limits. he wanted your cunt more than he had ever wanted anything in his life. he'd do anything for it at this point. lust had completely taken over his mind, making him moan like crazy at any one of your touches.
you made quick work of your lingerie, throwing it off with no care for its state. you had more pressing matters. it seemed like your brain had also been taken over by lust, even showing it in your desperation in ripping off his boxers. the way you wanted him had him throwing his head back. his glasses were completely foggy by now, not allowing him to see you very well. he went to take them off, only to be stopped by you.
"no! baby, keep them on, please. you look so sexy with your glasses, channie. keep them on? for me?" it was impossible to say no to you when your fingers were pulling at his nipples and your bare pussy was grinding against his length.
"y-yeah ... anything you want ..."
"anything? can i sit on you now, then, channie?", yes! you couldve sat on him the moment he first laid eyes on you at the beginning of the semester and he would've thanked all the gods for allowing him such pleasure.
"p-please ... need to feel y- shit!", you interrupted him by finally lowering yourself onto him.
"oh, channie ... fuck ... feel so ... so full," you sighed from above him, speeding up almost immediately at the pleasure.
he had no time to process the feeling, immediately losing his mind to the feeling. there were no coherent thoughts left in him. all he could do was cry as you rode him. you went crazy above him, practically humping him while you cried his name. he finally opened his eyes back up, falling further into insanity at the view in front of him.
your head was thrown back, with your eyes closed shut. one of your hands was on his chest for balance, while the other played with one of your breasts. the view literally made him salivate, having never been able to picture such an erotic image of you in his head no matter how hard he tried. this would ruin him. he was so addicted to you already, he knew that this would only make him fall even deeper.
"f-feel good, channie? tell me. wanna make y- fuck ... wanna make you feel so good."
"y-yes. fuck ... you- you're so perfect ... w- want ... shit. please ..." he had no idea what he was begging for, he just knew he wanted more.
"fuck me, baby. need to feel you. yeah? just ... your hips, baby, please."
he was delirious, but he was conscious enough to follow your every direction, digging his feet flat on the bed and beginning to thrust upwards, lacking any rhythm whatsoever. but it was enough to have you leaning over his chest and crying his name. it was also enough for chan to lose all control and begin ramming into you like a madman.
there was no control left in either of you, just humping against each other like animals in heat. he wanted to cum so badly, but not as bad as he wanted you to cum around him. the thought of you creaming against his dick made him throw his head back against the bed, eyes rolling back.
"ch- channie ... so fucking good. such a good b- boy for me. sweetest boy, shit. you're perfect, channie. and all mine. go- gonna use you all the time now. want you to give it to me every day. you will, wont you? give me what i want? let me sit on you every day? please ... need more ..." it was like you knew exactly which words to say to push his buttons. he'd give you anything you wanted. there was no need for you to ask.
he was about to blow his load, suddenly remembering you said you'd pull him out, but having his thought interrupted by you reading his mind once more.
"inside, channie. please ... i know- know it's not safe, but please ... im on birth control, its okay, channie, just- fuck! oh, channie! shit!", you began moaning uncontrollably, suddenly freezing above him as your walls tightened against him. you had finally reached your peak, dragging him right along with you.
he had orgasmed with you before, but never like this. he couldve sworn he blacked out for a few seconds, feeling his head go completely blank as he let the pleasure consume him. his voice went as high as ever, expressing the loudest moans he had ever let out. by the end of it, you were both empty shells of yourselves, landing against each other's bodies as you attempted to catch your breaths.
"baby ... are you okay? did you like it, channie?", the first thing you did was check on him. it truly made his heart soar.
"i love you."
shit. he hadnt meant to say that. he didnt even know he was feeling it? he was half-aware his feelings for you went past just attraction, but what he had just felt only confirmed it for him. he wanted you all to himself, except now he might lose you over his lack of control over his words after you got a hold on him.
"you do? channie ...'" you paused, "i love you too," you sealed your confession with a peck, still sitting on his dick, but ignoring all the juices traveling between the two of you.
he felt insane relief, deciding to further wrap his arms around you and pull you directly into his chest.
"'m gonna keep you now? mkay? you're all mine now, channie."
god, was he more than okay with that.
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medium-rare-bimbo · 10 months
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Disappeared for almost a year, willing to answer questions about that thank you for all the concern :)) but really sorry for abandoning you all <3<3
♡masterlist♡
Stalker! Ghostface! eddie x bimbo! reader
-Steve is also mentioned <3<3
Eddie = stu
Steve = billy
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!!!WARNINGS!!!
contains: dark! Eddie, noncon/ Dubcon, breeding kink, mentions of pregnancy (obvi <3), knife play, blood, murder, mentions of necrophilia, crying, kidnapping, mentions of suicide, mentions of self harm
MINORS DNI
♡ you're one of the most popular girls at school or maybe in the entirety of Hawkins, you were pretty, always best dressed and most importantly eye candy for those around you. It didn't help that you were the sweetest girl to exist, despite the difference between you and the losers of the world you didnt treat them any different humans were humans what they looked like or how they acted wasnt apart of your conscience.
♡ eddie was set on you being his first statement victim, his first chance to show hawkins that people who peak in highscool were nothing more than burnouts, his first time showing the world that popular people meant nothing in the big picture, the big ocean of the world were you're nothing more than a drop of water. You would make headlines, your name and reputation would let everyone know just what they would be dealing with. who they were messing with.
♡ he stalked you for hours, days, weeks, months, memorizing your habits, your friends, your daily routines, your class schedules, what you do when you get home, who you hang out with, your dates, your family, how you respond to calls, who you talk to, your house layouts, entrance and exit points. Every. Single. Detail. He had taken up a habit of stealing some of your belongings scrunchie, hair tie, pieces of paper you've doodled on, notes, strands of your hair, eddie wanted everything. when the small opportunity became available he would occasionally break into your home, convincing himself that this was to memorize the layout of your house but not stopping himself from taking what he pleases panties, bras, lip balm, shirts, skirts, anything old and useless or in a large quantity would go missing. You never seemed to notice things go missing anyway
♡ nothing was off limits for eddie, NOTHING. He watched you walk, talk, eat, shower, get dressed, EVERYTHING. maybe it was the pre murder adrenaline that made him overthink, the fear of getting caught, the risk he was taking, the orgasmic haze that flooded over him everytime he thought about your corpse laying infront of him, botched up, dismantled, butchered into nothing more than your own worth. perhaps this rush made him plan out every possible outcome. He couldnt waste a lifetime in prison over some dumb bimbo who didnt know what pythagoras was. He had no reason to feel guilt it wasnt as if he hadnt gotten rid of some nobodies before but this was you, this was different this, was more meaningful. a few dead people who no one knew the name of wasnt something people cared about because they werent popular. They were freaks and no one cares for freaks except the circus, a place where they can point and laugh.
♡As much as eddie feared the consequences of his actions he needed to do this, his entire life hes been treated as if he were a freak. This is what he was made to do picking off all of the useless nobodies who think they matter in a sea of carbon copies. No one should miss a model or an athlete when there were people out there becoming scientist, people out there saving lives while others make a living by simply existing.
♡ When steve had fallen from grace, dethroned by billy Hargrove, it was like something inside him snapped almost like something dark had taken control of him. he became this standoffish creature yet he still had charm and almost like ink to water the darkness naturally spread to eddie, somehow, someway the two became as thick as thieves overnight
♡ Eddie had always been dark, dark clothes, dark hair, dark eyes, dark music, dark life but Steve's influence made that darkness deepen, stories upon stories could come out about how disturbing eddie was yet they soon got swept under the rug when he was out with steve. creepy, charming, funny, manipulative, strange were all words you could describe eddie 'the freak' munson. Pherhaps he was already stained, perhaps steve reopening the wound letting the blood spill out was what caused this disaster, he needed to reignite the spark that made him, HIM and that spark seemed to be enough to cause an explosion.
♡ steve was the one to bring up the idea of murder, Nancy wheeler his ex girlfriend would be their (his) final girl every other victim a pawn and statement in his plan, his message to Hawkins, the world. although eddie had dabbled in the idea of killing someone almost obsessing, idolizing, romatizing dreaming of it he had never had the balls to pull it off, he knew there would accusations immediately pointed at him, soon losing the game he so desperately deserved to win at.
♡ eddie latched on to Steves reputation like a leech to flesh, he could get away with anything and no one would bat an eye. An alibi coming from steve 'the hair' harrington meant much more than cheerleaders who were known to torment eddie. The cops brushed off the suspicion with sympathy, poor eddie being targeted once again. Although that wasnt just the reason eddie became so attached to steve, him and Steve now shared the same ideology of the uselessness of popularity, billy hargrove was the best thing to come out of this school. Eddie now had a ride or die.
♡ when the topic of you being the first statement victim came up steve wasnt too pleased at the idea, you hadnt been mean to either of them and he was hoping the first assertion would be someone like billy, jason, chrissy or even Johnathan. He battled with eddie for days, weeks even, soon agreeing on the terms that it would be after he had used you, he wasn't about to slaughter a girl like you without trying you out first.
♡ a reluctant agree from eddie sealed the deal, steve sleeps with you, eddie ends you.
♡ they're outside your house steve in a tree eddie in a bush, their bodies unseen in the darkness as they watch their prey move about. Living room, hallway, kitchen, hallway, stairs, hallway, your room. Although they couldnt see into your room, this time you had remembered your curtains and as much as steve felt disappointment about not being able to witness your last moments he knew it was better this way. You wont see them and the nighbours wouldnt either
♡ as soon as your situated in your room he wait about 30 minutes before calling, going over the plan with eddie and hoping you're too warm to get out of bed and grab a knife. signalling to eddie that it was time to go He strategically moves around the perimeter of your house, making his way to the kitchen window that you never locked despite the fact there were murders, you never seemed to lock any of your windows almost as if you were inviting him in. the kitchen gave him the advantage to be unseen by cars possibly driving by and an easy way to grab an extra knife if needed.
♡ he crawled through the unlocked window, the black clothing blending into the night the only part of him visible is the white ghost mask covering his face. He could hear you talking to steve upstairs, answering his questions, asking questions and seemingly trying to get off the phone. He was excited almost, the thrill rushing over him as he heard your voice.
"Oh I dont really watch horror movies"
"....?"
"Yeah I get creeped out so much i usually watch them with someone, I dont like being alone watching monsters"
"....?"
"Yeah i just hate the suspense-"
So does he
"-it kills me-"
You have no idea
"- i just hate the music and the way you know you're obviously going to be scared but you just cant tell when"
"......?"
"Noo I'm not into cult things either, ever since the fire at melody lane I cant look at them the same"
".......?"
"Listen I'm just saying its really weird there was a fire and then the band blew up"
"......"
"I mean youd get suspicious too right? they're total cultists"
".... .....?
"T-they didnt sacrifice me I was just saying- listen is there a reason you called so late"
"......."
"If you're Jason or something I already said no leave me alone! I'm busy"
"..... ............. .......?"
"What do you mean where you are? I dont want to meet up for a quick fuck and I definitely dont want to know the name of someone who calls at god knows what hour"
"........"
".....what?"
"....."
"....The bathroom?"
"...."
".....The kitchen?"
"......"
"How close are you?"
"....."
"I'm not playing in to your stupid prank! I have things to do!!" You slam down the phone
♡ It was his go time, he waited and waited and waited hearing the phone ring and you quickly hanging up before the ringing stopped all together and he could hear the sound of your sheets moving. He waited some more, he wanted you to forget about the call, this time there would be no suspense youd think you're safe and sound until you're suddenly impaled by the knife in his grip.
♡ minutes ticked by he was sure steve thought he had pussied out. He reached his hand to the door knob and froze as he heard cries- moans. He couldn't believe this. You slut, you filthy, dirty, stupid slut you had just been threatened and told that there was someone in your house and you're touching yourself? Maybe eddie had been waiting so long that you had called Steve's the callers bluff.
♡ a shaking hand, one of delight not fear, twisted the door knob being silent however he doubted you could hear anything over you own moans to caught up in your world to acknowledge the murderer standing in your door way. The sight before eddie had been breathtaking and in any other circumstance he would have watched you until you came.
Hands down the front of your panties, head thrown back, eyes closed with nothing but a t shirt on, you clearly werent wearing a bra as he could perfectly see the outline of your nipples. He supposes adrenaline has different affects on everyone, yours just happens to be becoming horny. What a wonderful discovery
♡ he stalked towards you despite his heavy boots he made no sound, whines and gasps erupted from your throat as he neared closer truly getting the full show to it all. He leered above you like a hawk taking in the view before him until he strikes. He grabbed your mouth quickly shutting you up, muffling the scream that made it's way out of your throat, your hands immediately grabbing his own giving him a view of your sticky fingers all while shuffling up the bed to try and save your own dignity trying to block you body away from his sight.
♡ he climbed on top of you, pressing you into the bed and pinning your legs in place stopping the kicks from reaching him. He hung over you, his breathe heavy as he watched the horror in your eyes brighten as they caught glimpse of the weapon in his hand. You pleas and begs muffled into his glove as he stared at you giving you no indication of mercy
♡ He suddenly flips you over, your head forced into your pillows and stuffies silencing your protests with your ass raised, he pulled at you hips ragdoll-ing you into the position he wanted you in. He moved his hands down hour body towards your out of place panties reaching for the edge of them before you started yelling
"Get the fuck off of me-"
He roughly shoved your head back into the pillow once again silencing you
"Stay the down and shut the fuck up, I'll kill you now. I'll make you unrecognisable that the police will think you broke in do you want that?"
A sobbed out no and shake of the head came out, he once again shoved your head into your pillows as a warning
"Great now as you reminisce on your life, rethinking everything you've done and havent experienced you're gonna let me play with you until I'm bored got it?"
You once again nodded weeping into your pillow clutching the bears next to you, knowing the inevitable you accepted your fate. Atleast you'll be able to pray your family and friends knew you loved them
♡ eddie pulled your panties down slapping your leg indicating you to lift you knees up, he pocketed them keeping a souvenir for later. His hands found your thighs crawling their way up to your most intimate area he spread your holes with his thumbs, playing with the flesh revealing the sight of the juices leaking out of you no doubt from your little escapade. Eddie pondered while mindlessly playing with your anatomy, should he just kill you? Back out of this and get the job done? He shoudlnt be doing this, he was supposed to hunt food not play it. I mean it wasnt as if steve would mind right? He got his time to play and He wont cum in you probably, no dna behind the crime and he should atleast indulge. he is the one doing the dirty work. rationally he might as well have some fun before mutilating you right? Hes still going to kill you, has to. Maybe even kill you mid thrust and fuck your bleeding out corpse if hes up for it, going round after round until your body is cold.
♡ eddie, snapping out of his pondering thoughts, stopped playing with his now decided fleshlight shuffling his way up to you so his hips meet your ass, he hesitated slightly but barely before unbuckling his belt. Pulling down the tattered and worn out jeans (along with his boxers) to reveal his hard on. You sobbed harder as you felt him rub his cock on your cunt soaking in your juices, you were quickly shut up by a slap on your ass getting the memo you tried to bargain with him
"Please- please dont i- I can give you money or anything you want just please-"
He pressed his tip inside you, throwing his head back as you squealed and cried. A deep groan fell out of his mouth as your warmth wrapped around him. He brought his hands to the back of your neck gripping the hair harshly before leaning down
"I dont want money or clothes or food or a magic show I want your life and youre gonna give it to me you're gonna let me abuse this cunt and there's nothing you can do about it understood?"
"Mhm"
"Great now the only noise I want from your mouth are moans and cries because I dont want you to ruin this for me okay? I've waited so long to steal you away from the world this is only some self indulgence on my part you should be grateful"
♡ he began to slide in deep "Wait!"- you reached your arm back to push his hips away before his cock could enter "you need a condom I dont want to get pregn-" Before you could finish eddie pinned your arms against your back (forcing it to arch more than it already had) shoving his cock inside you to shut you up, you were being too loud as you actively ignored his order. You're such an idiot you wont be alive to carry a child, if he did cum inside, your body wouldnt be able to catch his seed youd be dead by then, hes about to murder you why would he leave behind obvious evidence?
♡ You squealed as his cock breached your hole barely giving you time to process the sheer size of it or the piercings that littered the underside. It wasnt long before he started thrusting in and out of you, he couldn't care less about your pleasure this isnt about you. You didnt deserve to adapt to the sudden abuse of your womb, you didnt deserve anything.
♡ although eddie was empty for your pleasure he did enjoy the moans and gasps coming out if you. If you had been a hook up at devils kettle after his band he would have took his time on you savouring the feeling of your walls as you took him, he would have tasted you until you couldnt breathe, came inside you until you couldnt walk, so many things he would have done differently. Nonetheless he doesnt regret what hes doing and what hes eventually going to do it's just a shame he couldnt relish in the tightness of your cunt regularly. Like poison you could only do have it once
"You know maybe I wont kill you think you can impress me enough for me to spare you? Huh? Or are you to dumb like the whore you are to even understand what I'm saying?"
"Mmm"
"Aww that's what I thought it's like you didnt want to live"
♡ his pounding picked up his grasp on your hip tightening almost squeezing immediate bruises into your skin. One of his gloved hands reached your headboard using it as leverage to fuck aswell as pulling it towards him to stop the repeated banging from it smashing into the wall. Your moans were a mixed with sobs and mumbles, you didnt even know what you were asking for, did you want him to stop? Or keep going? You're brain hazy and blinded by the violent treatment to your pretty puffy cunt
♡ Sweat from his brow dripped down into the mask soaking the fabric that covered the eyes and mouth. the mask in question did no job of muffling or hiding the noises that tumbled out of him, a mix of grunts, whines, groans and growls admitted from the man. He was unleashing all the pent up anger and insecurity into his thrusts. Stuttered breaths came from him although it sounded like snarls. His eyes couldnt focus on where to look, your face covered in your own sweat, tears and spit or the way your hole swallowed him in, practically sucking him back inside as soon as he left. It was a beautiful sight, your cunt now leaking down both his and your own thighs. red and raw from the ruining of his manhood and swollen balls repeatedly beating against your lips and clit.
♡ god he could keep you forever, locked in his rooms with nothing on, your only purpose is to be filled. Be his little housewife. Youd make such an amazing mommy you're so sweet to everyone youd be so good to him and his babies- what the fuck was he thinking?! Hes supposed to kill you not breed you like a cow and marry you what the fuck is wrong with him?? He picks up his forgetting knife tracing over your spine with it you squealed as he did, pressing yourself into your mattress to get away from the blade. He dragged the knife down to your thigh before making light marks upon them, maybe he could make it look like you were struggling mentally and was just some crazy bitch who cut herself to cope, if he stabs you correctly he could make it look like suicide.
♡ the pretty pearls of blood blossomed around the wounds he made, they were shallow but god did he love the sight of your blood as it trailed down your thigh similar to your own juices. Switching hands without pausing his momentum, swapping out the one holding your headboard. he began to do the same to your other thigh, relishing in the whimpers of either pain or confused pleasure although he guessed you enjoyed it from the way you clenched around him and started to try and move back against his thrusts. Knowing soon that if he didnt restrict with his mutilation he wouldnt be able to stop himself and it would no longer look self inflicted. He threw the knife next to him, leaning down to the crook of your neck breathing in your scent, his hand tip toed it's way to your throat pressing against your wind pipe as he watched your face, the face that was stuck in a pleading expression he knew you wanted mercy whether that be to cum or to live he knew you couldnt have one so he gave up on silencing the banging and reached his unoccupied hide down to yout clit pressing against the poor nub to gage your reaction immediately you moaned trying to turn you head into you pillow the hand on your throat disobeying you to even move. He rubbed the poor pearl in circles letting you cry out and your tears soak into his gloves
♡ his fun however was cut short by a person in the doorway, steve, dressed in his costume, head tilted with his arms crossed a disappointed stance as he watched the show infront of him 'really?' Was what steve was trying to say. In response eddie leaned up relocating his hand from your neck into the back of your head shoving you into the pillows before slapping your ass with the same hand staring directly at steve 'what are you gonna do about it'. You cried out at the sudden abuse which was met with another slap, steve having seen enough walked out probably raiding your fridge or something.
♡ you felt amazing hes kind of envious of steve for getting to you first, a slight wave of frustration washed over him as he couldnt have you again. His animalistic behaviour along with his feral treatment of you brought you close to the edge. Eddie's hands that now found their place back on your hips received urgent taps as you tried to communicate your end. He coudlnt care less though but he might aswell get the most he can out of his toy. Snaking on of his hands down to your clit, listening to your heightened wails as you drew closer the other hand leaving your hip and pressed against your stomach feeling the way he destroyed your insides. His body fell foward encapsulating your withering body that was too gone to hold itself up right.
"I- I'm gonna cum- I'm gonna cum- please let me cum please please please please-"
"Shshshhhh you can cum- you can cum im gonna make you cum and you're gonna thank me for doing such a nice thing before you die arent you?"
"yes yes yes yes- yes- oh please fuck- th-thank you thank you oh my god- please- thank you-"
♡ you tightened around him your back arching as your orgasm fell upon you, your fluids squirted along his cock as he continued his rampage, he was so close your pussy practically crushing him as he fucked your dead weight body
"Please- I'm s- sensitive I cant- s'too much- cant- cant take it"
"Y-you can take it. You can take all of it, you're taking me right now- you can take some more-"
♡ he felt his end near as he spoke, the urge to praise you and degrade you flooded through his brain desperately wanting to tell you how good you feel although nothing good ever last forever and he knew he couldnt mark you with his seed
"Didnt think youd be so tight- th-thought after all- all the dickheads you fuck wou- would loosen you out fucking slut, little bitch only good- for getting off"
"Nuh uh mmhmm'not- not a slut- dont sleep around- fuck please slow down please- they lie I dont-"
"They lie about it huh?- shit- they lie about fucking you? Just want to brag huh?"
"Mhmm"
♡ if heaven is real he it would definitely be inside you he didnt deserve heaven, not with the things hes done but he can spoil himself this one time right? Eddie pressed his head into the crook of your neck, the irritating fabric of his hoodie scratching your back, howls and groans spilled out of him he wanted to time it perfectly to pull out as soon as he cums, so much easier to wipe cum from skin then scrape it out of you. Though he doubts the cops would care if they found anything inside you a known minx filled with cum was not a surprise. He felt his hips buck into you stuttering as clawed his way to be closer to you, eddie isnt a strong man he couldnt pull out even if he wanted to, steve can go fuck himself they could find someone else, anyone.
♡ he spilled himself inside you wrapping his arms around your mid section to hold you against him, biting at any exposed flesh he could find, licking and sucking marks into your skin as he fell into greatness, He could feel his cum spill around his cock filling up your insides. Pants and heavy breaths came from the man above you maybe even whines but you couldnt be too sure, whispers of words you couldnt comprehend overflow from behind the mask as he slowly came down sloppy thrusts slowing down as he can to a halt. Over stimulated and hazy minded you barely acknowledge his peak, fuzzy and dumb you couldnt care less about what he does to you body. Your bedding was now soaked as you soon came to realize, he let go, forcing your body to fall flat on the bed. Carefully he pulled out of you watching his seed pool out of you, adding to the mess of your pretty little bed sheets, your poor pussy almost bruised and swollen from his attack, his cum highlighting the beauty of it
♡ he sat back and watched suddenly he didnt feel the urge to harm you, too caught up in post nut clarity. Instead of reaching for his knife he reached for your holes once again, spreading and playing with them, pushing his hard work back into it's new designated place listening to you let out sleepy whimpers and whines. He felt your combined juices melt into the fabric of his glove yet he couldnt care, hed do this every night for the rest if his life if it meant he could experience the warmth of your body.
♡ Eddie shifted off the bed catching a glimpse at your fucked out face barely able to keep your eyes open as your lashes fluttered, he knew you were fighting sleep a part of you aware of the danger you were currently in, however you werent aware of the change of plans. Eddie slipping his knife in the pocket of his jeans gave you one last look, strolling up to you and lifting his mask above his mouth, a small, short kiss pressed against your temple
"I'll be back baby"
♡ he made his way out of your room down the hallway, down the stairs and into he kitchen were he found steve sipping one of your dads beers.
"Did you do it?"
"...nope"
"Didnt think so.. wasnt any screams... jesus christ Eddie we've been planning this for months you were the one that suggested her"
"I mean... can you blame me?"
"Yes"
"That's fair... but you cant tell me her pussy didnt sway your mind about the whole murder thing"
"...."
"Steve lets be honest"
"I guess but that's not the point shes probably going to snitch on us you know that right"
"Please she's practically passed out on her bed, fucked dumb shes lucky she can even acknowledge where she is. She isnt gonna remember this"
"And what if she does"
"I can always go for round two"
"You're disgusting we are so dead"
"Well just have to wait and see wont we?"
♡ safe to say when monday came around there was no talk of your encounter with the infamous ghostface infact there was no indication that you had even had an interaction with a murderer, life went on as if nothing happened.
"Told you"
"You could've gotten us caught"
"But I didnt"
"So who next? I was thinking-"
♡ eddie zoned out as steve rambled one, his eyes travelling to your table as you chatted with friends, his marks were still there and he had no doubts your little girlfriends questioned you who did it. He liked the look of you wearing his claim. He'll visit you tonight, this time he'll fuck the way he truly wants.
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todayisafridaynight · 7 months
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oh i would could and should draw but ghhhhhggg rock candy...
#snap chats#i survived grocery shopping //demonic screeching//#i bought a new clay pot and can opener while i was gone :) i went over budget 🧍‍♂️#WHAT DID I EVEN BUY i finally got eggs <3<3<3<3<3<3 24 of them <3 <- i will finish this in two weeks#i really wanted to find kimchi but i couldnt find it in the market i was checking... i did buy mangosteen tho :)#which turned out more expensive than i thought itd be 🧍‍♂️ ANYWAY#while i was at the asian market i Of Course happened upon the candy isle#and i saw those little star rock candies aka Konpeito#mental illness took over... i couldnt Not think of honnouji hotel so i said 'ok Oda Nobunaga are these hype or not'#and ive eaten half the bag </3 ITS LITERALLY JUST COLORED SUGAR and yet im being reminded of my youth#wherein i would just eat sugar cubes.. but these are so much crumblier and fun to eat... oops..#anyway im not grocery shopping for another month <3 probably <3 i mean im going home next month so.. lol#and then semester's practically over.. so yeah ill be fine#im so excited to cook with my pot tho.. i bought pork floss and i reaaallyy wanna try it in a rice ball..#i saw my fave filipino youtuber do that once.. and pork floss delicious as is I ALMOST BOUGHT A BIG FUCK-YOU JAR#AND THEN I SAW A SMALLER MORE REASONABLE SIZED CONTAINER#you know whats wild. technically my dad's a filipino youtuber. he had a youtube account for A Month during the pandemic#and the other month he was remembering and he was like 'why did i do that 🧍‍♂️' LOL#ok im rambling im gonna eat this whole bag. NO IM NOT i also got match sweet roll cakes <3 i swear i didnt just buy sweets just these two#andallthefruit I SWEAR I BOUGHT LIKE MEAT AND VEGETABLES i just had some already.. i really did just need eggs to cook..#ok im rambling BYE im gonna make matcha tea so i feel better#if i draw anything it'll be a miracle
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mrfoox · 2 years
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I am legit losing my mind over this constant nausea it's not even funny
I bolted awake at 4 am, after sleeping one hour, ran back and forth to the bathroom 5 times. Didn't pass so I laid awake in bed til like 6 am and then I managed to sleep a couple of hours
Then it's morning and I need to take my medication... Yeah still nauseas :')
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writingoddess1125 · 7 months
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My Heart Breaks Pt. 2
Warning: Angst then Fluff
Buggy X FemReader
Support me on Ko-Fi
Part 1
Replaced the Photo! Cause this was too perfect! Art belongs to Vamos_MK on twitter!!
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You stared up at the blue sky with a tired sigh, finally you were free.. Over two fucking decades it had taken to escape and you did it God damn it!
For the last 20 years you had been imprisoned in the Impel Down- It had been awful yo say the least.. constantly you were trying to protect yourself and saw that the man who had sent you here had been extra cruel in doing so- well not you but the women who you took her place..
You still felt guilt in knowing she had died in your place.. but you couldnt help but be greatful she had wanted to die due to her cause in an accidental death. You hoped in her afterlife she was happy..
However death was definitely kinder then the prison- with monsters at every turn and trying to keep sex deprived prisoners from trying to have their way with you it had been a battle. You had scratched, fought and squeezed your way out of that hellhole.
After a changing of guards you had managed to slip out- unlike most of the prisoners in the Impel Down you had the enate abilies to swim so you did. Stealing a dingy that a negligent marine most likely left behind you made it out. Paddling like your life depended on it sway from that place, however you were in no position to cry in relief yet.
It was another 2 days of paddling before you manages to get to an island. Starving and dehydrated you snuck to the back end of the tiny island so no one saw your prison uniform. Stealing some berries and a pair of clothes from a small cottage you made it through the village, it was clear this place was poor- you blended in with the people who were just as hungry as you and with less berries then you had nabbed.
You went into a pub getting what you could afford, which was bread and cheese and a ale. You took these and stood outside to eat your meal which tasted no better then ash in your mouth.
Looking around you saw two better dressed men walk out of the pub, batting a poor boy on the back and laughing. Congratulating him for joining their merchant ship- catching your ear you finished your meal and drink quickly, following the men. Seeing a large ship with a line of young men wanting to join the ship for a better life and opportunity, so you join them.
Once you reached to the top of the ship, a old man held out a cane to your chest to keep you from moving forward.
"What do you want lady?-" The old Captian sneered at you, Glaring down at your dirty form.
"You're looking for sailors correct?" You say sharply, Taking a steady breath to still your nerves.
"What can a thing like you do on a ship? Do you even have sailing experience?" The Captian laughed in your face. You clenched your fist and glared hard at the asshole.
"Yes I have sailed since I was young- I can.. do cleaning and maintance" You lied a bit- not talking about your skills as a thief since this is just a merchant and not pirates like you were used to. The Captian stared at you for a moment before sighing with a shrug.
"Fine- Welcome to the May's Fairy Lady" He grumbled as he gestured for you to get on board. Sighing in relief as you had a way to sea and a income.
However that was better said then in reality-
To say the merchant ship was terrible as well had been an understatement- It was like the Impel Down all over again.. a group of touch starved and angry men who saw you as an easy target. Thankfully due to your skills you were able to evade any advances, during the day you would stay in the Lower Deck to avoid the men, cleaning and eating the stale bread and water you snagged not trusting the cook since he liked to Leer at you far too long.
At night you would travel to the Main Deck and clean up there and sleep till dawn or if the ship rocked a bit too hard. This had been your like for 3 months till one evening.
While mopping the floor of the deck you looked up at the dark sky, remembering the night with Buggy before that big heist. Grabbing him and kissing his suddently as a way to express your interest in him... your heart hurt at remembering his face when you saw him last at the bars of the window, Placing your bandana and kissing a kiss on the back of his hand.
Snapping you from your melancholy thoughs was a loud bang, seeing what looked like a firework shoot up right above you. Several crew mates from below deck also came up at hearing the noise, you watched the firework come directly on top of the ship before exploding in a cloud of red- It was beautiful. Your favorite shade of red too. The crew began to panic at seeing this as the cloud settled on the ship, you felt woozy and uneasy on your feet before you fell to the damp ground before darkness took you a large shadowy form of a ship came closer and you swore you heard circus music.
Groaning you felt yourself sitting up, a harsh digging from metal against your ankles and wrist. Jerking awake you saw you were seated in wooden benches in a dark room, Hearing the groaning and panic of others around you. You pulled at the chains slightly but winced at how tight they were.
Suddently bright lights turned on, You saw your crew chained up and seated next to you staring at a lowered stage. Your breath picking up as circus music started up, watching as different acts come up- it was almost exactly like how you remembered the show you went to in your childhood? Like someone recreating it from memory? People pulled out sighs to applaud which you saw the merchant nervously do.
"No No NO! It's wrong! That is not how a crowd should clap!" You heard a sharp voice say, walking onto the stage- He looked like a pirate Captian and not apart of the circus. You did see clown paint on his face and a red clown nose- which made your eyes narrow at the sight.
Your eyes focused on the grown man- Watching as he commanded the crowd with a twisted smile and yelled at the circus people. He sighed dramtically and looked in the direction of the crowd- chastising them for their lack of enthusiasm and not laughing with the cues. However the wind felt like it was knocked from your lungs.. You knew those eyes.. that blue hair expertly tucked away and real rounded red nose.
"Bugs?" You called out loud by accident- You saw his whole body freezes mid step. A twitch seemed to have shot through his system as your merchant crew mates all looked back at you with a mixture of pity and fear. You swallow a nervous lump as he did a slow turn in your direction, your face still clouded in shadows by the lack of lights in the audience section. Doing a silent hand movement his crewmates assended on you, yanking you from your restraints roughly and pulling you to the stage with little grace and tossing you at Buggy's feet. Rubbing your swore wrist you looked up at your childhood friend through your mess of hair.
"What the Hell Bugs? Shackles!? When the fuck do you use Mph!-" You were cut off as he grabbed your face hard tp pull you to your feet, his eyes wide and overly dilated like he was seeing a ghost. You actually felt afraid? His eyes seemed different and there was a unknown emotion behind them, you tried to wiggle free but he held you firmly taking his free hand and pushing the hair from your face fully at seeing your face you see it looks like all the air has been sucked from his lungs and he releases you quickly, you stumble back barely able to catch yourself as he stares at you with wide eyes.
"You're alive?..." He said in utter shock. You nod and cough a bit as you rub your sore jaw from his grasp. You open your mouth to speak but he holds a hand to you to silence you. His eyes looking more like what you remembered, that swirl of never ending emotions.
"Cabaji- Take her to be washed, fed and dressed. Leave her in my quarters" He commanded, the green man nodded heavily and grabbed you far gentler now to lead you off stage.
Just as instructed a group of people washed you up in a massive copper bath with nice hot water, dressed you in simple trousers and a tunic and quickly dropped you off with a plate on the end table of the large bedroom.
Seated in a massive bed you look down at the hot plate set before you, your manners thrown out the window as you tucked in. Having been far too long since you had a hot filling meal-
Without thinking you rapidly start eating it, it tasted like heaven enough for tears to well in your eyes as you ate. Before long the plate was gone- and you felt nauseous, yout mistake of eating too quickly and food you hadn't experienced in 20 years. You scrambled up to the nearest trashcan and began to vomit- so hard you didn't hear the door open. Only when a gentle hand touched your back which made you flitch and turn around to see Buggy, his eyes wide at your reaction before your body lurches and you vomited again. Buggy held your hair back this time as you vomited into the poor trashcan.
"Sorry... it's been a while since I got a hot meal" You admitted, spitting the taste of bile away from your lips as you sat back.
"It really is you" Buggy said in disbelief still, Getting down on his knees next to you as he looked over you. How you looked so unhealthy and weak- even after being cleaned he could see that abuse had done its work on you.
"Dear Gods... What happened to you?..." Buggy voice finally cracked, his hand reaching out and cupping your cheek his thumb running over the heavy bags under your eyes and the new scars that had set on your face.
"...I survived" You say softly, Leaning into his warm touch feeling tears begin to fall. In seconds Buggy held you tightly in his arms, your face pressed against his chest as ragged sobs left you, maybe it was finally being free from both jail and the hardships on that awful merchant ship but feeling Buggy's arms around you holding you close just finally released that emotional valve and you cried.. Harder then you had in your entire life into his chest.
You felt his hands smooth over your messy hair and rock you side to side as you sobbed against him. You tried to speak but sobbing nonsense was all that left you and was mumbled through Buggy's shirt.
After almost an hour of crying against Buggy you had worn yourself out, sniffling against him as he gently pulled back to look at your reddened face. His own makeup having dripped away from his red eyes- clearly he had been crying too while holding you.
He wiped your face with his gloved hand and laid kisses on your forehead to comfort you.
"You never have to just survive again... I-Im sorry (Y/N) I couldn't save you" His voice cracked at that, you shook your head.
"I-It would have been impossible. You two would have been killed..." You say with a sniffling tone, trying to control your tone and keep from crying again. Buggy asked what had happened, as you told him the story of your escape, prison time, the pain you had suffered and how you'd escaped to be hired by those merchants. He listened dead silent the whole time his hands rubbing circles in your arms to comfort you. However you saw the rage in his eyes at the pain you'd gone through.
Once done explaining yourself he nodded at this, like he was trying to find the words to explain but couldn't. Instead just giving a bitter chuckle at this, shaking his head in anger. He reached up and took off his hat with a angry sigh and tossed it aside. Your eyes catching the bandana underneath and reaching a hand out to touch the fabric.
"You kept that?.. after all these years?" You whispered confused, the anger on his face leaving as he heard this and left your touch. Reaching up and gently pulling off the old bandana for you to see.
"Of course- you gave it to me... W-When you... left. I was destroyed" He admitted, you stared at him with tears starting to fall from you again.
"I couldn't look at myself in the mirror without seeing the face that had let you down.. so I changed- I smiled for you, wore your favorite red and became Buggy the Clown"
He said with a chuckle and gestured to himself. You bit your lip to keep from crying more, he wiped your tears away with a shaky breath.
"You did that for me? Why?" You whispered, he stared at you silently before having a nervous smile.
"I love you"
His words made your heart skip- like that spark of life from when you were 15 had hit you again. Your eyes met his, he also seemed taken aback by his admittance.
"You love me?" You questioned, seeing him nervously mess with his gloves. He always did have little nervous tics like this whenever he was in a odd position, however peeling off one of his gloves to dig his nail into his palm he nodded. You reached forward and took his hand into your own to keep him from harming his hand further.
"Well I'd hope so after giving you my first kiss on that little boat"
You both giggled at this. You rubbing your thumb on his naked palm, seeing the deep scars that covered his hands- like he had dug his nails into them so many times that his palms was covered in smiley faces.
"Of course, didn't hurt it was my first kiss too" He chuckled but you winked at him.
"Don't lie, I remember the story of you and Shanks running on deck and your guys mouth smashing together. That counted" Buggy shiffered in disgust at the memory and wrinkled his face which made you laugh.
"That doesn't count!" He protest which earned more laughter from you, he smiled widely at this.
"Sooo if both of us are still interested, Would you like to continue what should have been?" You asked, giving him a blushing smile which he returned. A big Goofy grin on his face-
"Well, let's get you healthier first. What about a dinner date?" He suggested, almost giddy and you could see that same boy you once knew under that makeup again.
"Sounds perfect"
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