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kiriona-apologist · 4 years

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omg, “you can’t run from time” but cophine. like season 2/3 when cosima was sick

i cracked open the clone reports to double check this info more times than i care to count

We're chasing stars (716 words)

“I always wanted to travel the world,” Cosima says, barely wincing as the needle slips into her arm. She’s gotten used to being poked and prodded over the past few weeks, after all, and Delphine is skilled enough that she barely feels it at times. “I mean, I traveled for a bit before I started at Berkeley but I mean really travel the world. South America, Asia, all that stuff. Meet new people, see new sights. Eat new food.”

“Once you are well enough to travel, we can certainly do that,” Delphine replies, methodically filling a few vials of blood.

“Take anymore and I might start to think you’re a vampire,” Cosima teases, nudging Delphine’s shin with her foot. All she gets is a hummed reply, so she continues on. “You know what I really would have liked to do? Take you surfing." Delphine looks up from her work at that, question in her eyes. "We could have gone camping, made a whole thing out of it." She stifles a cough into the elbow that Delphine isn't holding steady. "Or stargazing. It's really hard to see stars here in the city, it would have been really nice to get out for a little while."

"We can still do all of that." Delphine's hands tighten around her arm slightly and before Cosima can get a read on her expression, she's looking down again. "We'll find a cure, Cosima, and then we can do all of that."

"And if we don't, Delphine?" Cosima asks, trying her best not to shout. it's not Delphine's fault that things are the way they are. "My condition's not exactly getting any better, is it? It's not as if I've made a sudden turn for the better." She stifles another cough, face contorting and Delphine lets go of her arm for a moment to brush a hand against her cheek. It's against the rules they've set for themselves, trying to limit the affection they showed at work. Their situation is precarious enough that they don't need anymore strikes against them. For the moment, however, Cosima lets herself lean into the touch for a moment before pulling away again, nodding towards her arm.

"We are going to find a cure," Delphine says. "We have to. I won't let you die."

"You can't run from time, Delphine," Cosima says, and she tries to say it as gently as she can. Even then, she feels Delphine's slight recoil in the pit of her stomach. "There's so much that I want to do, but I don't know if I have the time to do them. And I want to do them with you." She inhales shakily, holding it for a second before exhaling. "WEll, maybe not all of them. But there's a lot that I want to do with you and-"

"Cosima," Delphine says softly, and she's bandaging up the inside of her elbow, bringing her arm up to press a kiss to the bandage. She looks on the verge of tears and Cosima swallows thickly. "You cannot give up hope. That is what will sustain you, in the end. If you give up now, it is as if you are already dead. We have a chance, Cosima, a real chance at curing this disease."

"I know, Delphine," Cosima murmurs, watching Delphine pull away and start to tug the gloves off her fingers. "I just..." she trails off. They don't speak for a long moment, filled with Delphine bustling about to clean up the station where they'd set up, Cosima swinging her legs as she watches. There isn't much else she can do in the moment besides watch and think.

"Let's go to the park," she says when Delphine has finished. "Just a short walk around. It'll be good for me to get some fresh air." Delphine looks about to protest and Cosima waves a hand to continue speaking. "And I'll make sure to tell you if my chest starts hurting or anything like that."

"And no discussions of clones?" Delphine asks, and she looks hopeful and it's all Cosima can ever really ask for, isn't it?"

"No clone talk," Cosima says and she slips off the edge of the table to walk forward and link their hands together, mustering the most genuine smile she can. "Promise."

#this was fun to write tho #thank you so much #love me some angsty cophine #orphan black #orphan black fic #cophine #cosima niehaus #delphine cormier #angst #my fic #prompt #asks

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detectivehoward · 4 years

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cophine fanfic rec list <3

With quarantine in place, I feel inspired to create a fanfic rec list for my favorite ship Cophine (Cosima Niehaus & Delphine Cormier from one of the most amazing TV shows: “Orphan Black”). Quick searches of “_ fanfic rec lists” on Google and Tumblr are what started my reading of fanfiction... so hopefully – if someone ever goes down my “fanfic journey” – they’ll find this fanfic rec list.

*note: list is not constructed in any particular order (e.g. most favorite to least)

**summaries provided are the ones written by the author. i will try to add my own summaries if there wasn’t one (already) provided. overall, thank you to the authors for blessing us, readers, for everything.

1. I’m not French, I’m Jealous. By TB80.

Summary: Cosima is traveling the globe with the love of her life, and things have never been better. Everything is perfect. Everything except for two simple sentences that won't stop haunting Cosima's thoughts."I'm French. We enjoy lovers."

2. Daylight Savings Time. By KaydenVayne.

Summary: Cosima never used to be a morning person, but perhaps the shift from night owl to early bird is proving to be more problematic than Delphine originally anticipated. A bit of domestic Cophine fluff written for the prompt "things you said at the kitchen table."

3. grey’s anatomy’s got nothing on us. By BeggarWhoRides.

Summary: “Hey,” Xinyi hisses from her bunk, when Harper is just starting to teeter over the edge into sleep. “I’ll bet you fifty bucks they’re having hate-sex." Or, five times surgical interns Harper Rowe and Xinyi Zhou tried to figure out the relationship between Dr. Cormier and Dr. Niehaus, and one time they knew exactly what it was.

4. Dance Me To the End of Love. By SonnectCXVI.

Summary: A series of vignettes about Cosima and Delphine in a loving, long-term relationship.

*one of my favorites. so beautifully written.

5. Nothing Gold Can Stay. By SonnetCXVI.

Summary: Delphine ponders photographs of Shay and Cosima.

6. Heartbreak Even. By jaybear1701, OBFrankenfics, & tatarrific.

Summary: Cosima and Delphine in the aftermath of 3x01. A Cophine spec fic based on various OBS3 spoilers.

*one of my all-time favorites. i re-read this one all the time.

7. Before (a series). By Celine1618.

Description: A collection of related works loosely based on the Before trilogy (Before Sunrise, Before Sunset, and Before Midnight).

8. Delphine’s Descent. By gigi2690.

Summary: “I wasn’t supposed to fall for you, but I did.” ~Six vignettes telling the story of how Delphine Fell.

9. Continuing Travels of Cophine (a series). By ce_ucumatli.

Description: Post-season 5, Cophine Adventures.

*a fandom favorite

10. Like Real People Do. By backtoblack101.

Summary: Cosima ends her relationship after she finds out Delphine knew the stem cells were from Kira's tooth. Both women realise they can't live without the other, though it takes both of them a very long time to admit it.

*another one of my all-time favorites .. guess i like angst ha

11. Passengers. By zolawinters.

Summary: COPHINE VERSION OF THE FILM PASSANGERS (2016) - On a routine journey through space to a new home, Cosima, sleeping in suspended animation, is awakened 90 years too early when the ship malfunctions. After a year of being alone Cosima makes a drastic decision, and Delphine awakens. As Cosima and Delphine face living the rest of their lives on board, with every luxury they could ever ask for, they begin to fall for each other, unable to deny their intense attraction, until they discover the ship is in grave danger. With the lives of 5,000 sleeping passengers at stake, can Cosima and Delphine can save them all.

12. The Martians. By TB80.

Summary: Cosima Niehaus had dreamed about going to Mars her entire life. Due to a freak sand storm, she ends up getting more than she bargained for. Getting stranded on Mars alone would be hell, but getting stranded with Delphine may just be the best thing that ever happened to her. Cophine AU based on the movie The Martian.

13. Love Match. By Mondax.

Summary: Multi-chapter AU: A series of last minute, happy accidents causes Cosima – an underrated and underachieving professional tennis player, and Delphine – an up-and-coming actress, to cross paths. Intrigued with each other from the get-go, would they be willing to complicate their already busy and accomplished lives with love? You don’t need to get tennis to read this story.

14. The Webs We Weave. By fembuck.

Summary: A look at what was going on in Delphine’s head during the scene where her secrets are revealed by Cosima.

15. A Beautiful Surrender. By jaybear1701.

Summary: A recovered Cosima travels to Africa to join a DYAD research expedition and meets a beautiful, but haunted MSF doctor in need of some cheering up. Canon-ish AU mildly influenced by Evelyne Brochu's film Inch'Allah.

16. into the night with me. By LtTanyaBoone.

Summary: Cosima'd figured that perhaps she could offer Dyad a trade. She's a scientist, after all. Her natural curiosity, her penchant for science and learning, along with being immortal, it's helped her gain quite some knowledge in her lifetime. She'd figured that perhaps the Institute would be interested in hiring her. aka rewrite/expansion of the vampire!AU of Every Me and Every You

17. Noise Complaints. By hellafitzgerald.

Summary: Delphine gets a noise complaint from a new neighbour. Good things result. Who even knows how this happened. First I was writing cute fluff about Delphine hearing Cosima sing in her kitchen and then there was smut. *shrugs*

18. Who Do You Love. By ghostriverunicorn (formerly known as otp424B21).

Summary: This takes place after 03×06. Cosima wakes up in the middle of the night and needs solitude, but what she finds is what she really needs.

*i love this piece of writing. love.

19. In Vino Veritas. By skivvery.

Summary: "No one gave her much credit for anything, but if there was one thing Delphine Cormier could claim for herself (and there were several, truly, though she was humble enough not to brag – when sober), it was willpower."

20. Holiday Strife. By anonymouscophine.

Summary: Requested: Domestic AU: Having to put up holiday decorations together after a big fight. Rated T

21. something always brings me back to you. By wingardiumleviosa111.

Summary: Three weeks and two days after Delphine breaks up with her, Cosima finds herself caught up in a furry sweater that smells like Delphine, the remnants of an Eskimo Pie still dotting her lips.

22. burned but not buried. By sharkfights (feartown).

Summary: Delphine is never going to look in the mirror and see Rachel. set s3.

23. 23 feels (23 Flavours, and Then Some). By trylonandperisphere.

Summary: Okay, here's my entry for the "23 emotions people feel, but can’t explain" challenge. What can I say? I'm totally mired in the save Delphine/cophine feels of late.

24. wedding planner AU (a one-shot from “Every Me and Every You”). By LtTanyaBoone.

25. coffee shop AU (a one-shot from “Every Me and Every You”). By LtTanyaBoone.

26. Corresponding Shapes (Like Puzzle Pieces From The Clay). By novel_concept26.

Summary: Soulmate: (n.) A person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner. An anthology of unconnected AU environments, as prompted by various souls on Tumblr.

27. (If You’re) Going My Way. By geekmonkeyramblings.

Summary: Cophine Hitchhiker AU: Great things (and people) can turn up in unexpected places - like, for example, on the side of the road, holding a sign that reads “San Fran or Bust.” Delphine is not at all the type to give a stranger a ride, but there’s something about Cosima that she just can’t resist. What are the odds that a random hitchhiker could have such a profound effect on her life in a single day?

28. Business & Pleasure. By mveloc.

Summary: Some gratuitous Cophine porn without (or with very minor) plot.

29. Le Fil. By Dangereux.

Summary: Inspired by another fabulous prompt from thetravelingkid: "Delphine is an important person at a party, and Cosima is the bartender who hits on her with no idea who she is."

30. Any Other Time. By VillageVoice.

Summary: Non-clone AU. Cosima, after going through a nasty break-up and an aggressive auto immune disease, decides to take a “sabbatical”

*** if any of the links are not working or are incorrect (i.e. goes to the wrong fanfic), let me know! also, i’ll be updating this list (or at least trying to) whenever i find a new, lovely fic.

#orphan black #cophine #cosima niehaus #delphine cormier #cosima x delphine #delphine x cosima #orphan black fanfic #orphan black fanfiction #orphan black fanfic rec list #cophine fanfic rec list #cophine fanfic #hopefully ppl enjoy this hahahahahah i love this

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ao3feed-cophine · 4 years

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Continuing Travels of Cophine, Part 4

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2MEVKFp

by ce_ucumatli

Picks up pretty much right where Part 3 left off.

Words: 6428, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Series: Part 4 of Continuing Travels of Cophine

Fandoms: Orphan Black (TV)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/F

Characters: Cosima Niehaus, Delphine Cormier

Relationships: Delphine Cormier/Cosima Niehaus

Additional Tags: Oral Sex, Teasing

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2MEVKFp

#IFTTT #ao3feed #fanfic #Obfic #cophine fic

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ao3feed-orphanblack · 4 years

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Continuing Travels of Cophine, Part 4

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2MEVKFp

by ce_ucumatli

Picks up pretty much right where Part 3 left off.

Words: 6428, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Series: Part 4 of Continuing Travels of Cophine

Fandoms: Orphan Black (TV)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/F

Characters: Cosima Niehaus, Delphine Cormier

Relationships: Delphine Cormier/Cosima Niehaus

Additional Tags: Oral Sex, Teasing

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2MEVKFp

#ao3feed #fanfic #orphan black #fanfiction #obfic

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janyolski · 7 years

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The magic spell you cast...

(Give your heart and soul to me)

Just a sweet Cophine one-shot. Link on FFN | AO3

You brush your thumb against the felt covered-lid of the small box you're holding. You close your eyes as the memories, uncontrollable, wash over you carrying tidal wave after tidal wave of emotions.

Three.

Three years after the defeat of Neolution; three years since the love of your life and her sisters achieve the freedom over their own bodies and three years of travelling around the world; inoculating each LEDA clone, saving 274 people and giving them the chance to live their lives free of any worry or threat from greedy men and corporations and scientists.

Your lover turned to you after the last LEDA received the vaccine you both risked your lives for, fought for in blood, sweat, and tears. She smiled, laughed, then broke down crying. You were taken back to that moment on the floor of her apartment, chin resting on folded hands on the edge of the bed, pressing send on the evidence incriminating the institution that has held you both hostage for so long; putting the final nail into the coffin, destroying all those that hurt you both - all those that tried to own her.

But your Cosima wasn't meant to be owned. Not in reality, not by anyone. Not even you.

And isn't that the one thing you loved about her?

But then she decides to give herself to you. She chooses you.

And then you're just hers even more.

Two.

Two years after that, two more years filled with domesticity - of a warm home, of kiss-goodbyes and kiss-welcome-homes, of "have a great day at the lab, baby", and more crazy science, of holidays with Sarah, Alison, Helena, Felix, Art, Donnie, Scott and the children. Two years of research and studies and much-deserved awards and galas and thank-you speeches where you both never ever forget to mention each other.

I would not be here if not for the love of my life…

Thank you to my better half for being with me through it all…

To Delphine, I love you…

To Cosima, enchantee, forever...

Two years with no bad guys and corporations and evil clones to fight or unaware clones to cure.

Two years of just being Delphine and Cosima, the nerdy lesbian aunts.

Two years of peace.

Two years filled with so much love.

One.

It’s one o'clock in the afternoon and you're sitting inside your car playing with the dark blue tiffany box. Your heart has been pounding madly in your chest and you've been trying to contain all of the emotions for the past ten minutes since you arrived and parked under your building.

You start humming out of the blue.

Des yeux qui font baisser les miens Un rire qui se perd sur sa bouche Voilà le portrait sans retouche De l'homme auquel j'appartiens

You've always loved La Vie En Rose and believed it to be one of the most beautiful love songs ever written. You shift to english and start singing out loud now, exiting your car, going up the elevators to your floor.

Hold me close and hold me fast The magic spell you cast This is la vie en rose

You stand in front of the door to the apartment you share with your girlfriend. You both always start counting from the year you met. The door suddenly opens as you put your hand on the knob.

Zero.

Your heartbeat starts ringing even in your ears now as you lay eyes on the woman you've woken up next to for the past five years.

"Oh, hey babe! I knew you were out here. I had a weird feeling in my gut."

She gives you her usual lopsided toothy grin. Her dreadlocks are formed like a bun today instead of the usual ponytail.

You take a deep breath and exhale.

It's now or never.

You pick up where you left off in the song and serenade your lover.

When you kiss me heaven sighs And tho I close my eyes I see la vie en rose

Cosima raises an eyebrow, probably wondering where this was all coming from. You press yourself against her. You hold her waist with one hand and you raise her hand with the other in a waltz position.

"Whaat?"

Cosima laughs and you press your forehead against hers, chuckling also. She is so beautiful and she is all you've ever really wanted, you think, from the moment you laid eyes on her until now. You are a ball of nerves waiting to explode and so you push through because if you can't forgive yourself if you don't, so you continue singing and you start swaying.

When you press me to your heart I'm in a world apart A world where roses bloom

And when you speak... angels sing from above Everyday words seem... to turn into love songs

You raise both your arms over your heads and you twirl her. Cosima giggles now. You remember the first time you promised yourself to her in her old apartment. You also remember the first time you heard her say it in words that she gives herself to you, that night at Felix's first gallery opening after you bought the painting of her.

You keep singing and swaying.

Give your heart and soul to me And life will always be La vie en rose

You end the song and Cosima smiles up at you. She moves in for a kiss but you stop her. She raises an eyebrow at you in confusion.

You go down on one knee, open the tiffany box and hold out the ring.

The confusion in the eyes of your lover turns to shock to happiness to glazed from the multitude of emotions swimming in the brown orbs that hold your heart and soul. Tears roll down her cheeks and everything blurs and you realize it's because you're crying now, too.

You try to push the question past the lump in your throat.

"Cosima… Will you marry me?"

Cosima smiles then laughs, then breaks down crying harder. She bends down and hugs you and holds onto you so tight that you just know that this is her giving you an unspoken 'yes'. Cosima cries so hard that it was impossible to speak.

You think back to the night at her apartment, sending those files; to the night after inoculating the last LEDA.

But somehow, you think these tears are different.

You think it's because unlike those two times, Cosima isn't crying because she's finally free or relieved.

Now, Cosima is crying because she is home.

Song is La Vie En Rose. It really is one of the most beautiful pieces of art out there.

#la vie en rose #and life will always be #cophine #cophine fanfiction #cophine fic #cophine fanfic #fanfiction #mine #orphan black #fanart #cophine wedding #cophine proposal #delphine cormier #cosima niehaus #cosima x delphine #delphine x cosima #the magic spell you cast #my fic

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sisterhoodofthetravelingrai-blog · 7 years

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Sapphie Meets her Idol

July 2017, USA

Greetings Sapphic friends! You can call me Em. I’m 29 years old of age, and if you get that reference, you know why I’m here. I fully blame Santana Lopez, Brittany S. Pierce, and the Brittana fandom for unleashing my inner gay. And because sapphic Tumblr is basically the Hotel California, when Glee was done I stayed for the Shoot, the Cophine, and most importantly, the brilliant sapphic ladies who helped me along on my journey. It felt like we were all in this together… like a sisterhood, you might say.

And so, at one sleepless 4 in the morning, I thought… “there needs to be a Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants… but like… gay.” After some reassurance from my sapphic Tumblr tribe that this was, in fact, a great idea, plus some discussion re: what sort of inanimate gay object would make a good travel buddy, Sapphie the First was born!

Sapphie the First and I had a great time together. She helped me play my ukulele for the very first time, got to express her artistic side by painting Halloween pumpkins, and helped me with some other crafting projects. She then went on her merry way to meet my wonderful friend from college, Heather. From there, she went to meet a lovely young lady who was on her way home to India. Sapphie the First went in her suitcase, and I guess that suitcase must have been both very gay and very enthusiastic, because she decided to take Sapphie on her own adventure. We never heard from either of them ever again, so I’m assuming they are off in the Himalayas somewhere, meditating and taking in nature.

We waited a number of months to make absolutely sure Sapphie the First was on a permanent meditation retreat. Once we got confirmation, Sapphie the Second (heretofore referred to as Sapphie) was born!

Sapphie’s first adventure with me was a very gay adventure. That’s right, you guessed it: we went to go see Wonder Woman!

(Clearly General Antiope was impressed with Sapphie!)

Listen, friends. I had been hearing tales of sapphics ascending to new levels of gay when seeing this movie. I could not have anticipated just how true this would be. What is it about fierce, strong, beautiful women in battle that just makes everything turn rainbow??

Overwhelming gayness aside, Wonder Woman is now a favorite of both of ours. It’s funny, it’s sweet, it’s empowering. Diana is inarguably both adorable and awe-inspiring, Etta is a treasure, and the Amazons deserve an entire prequel just about them. After seeing this movie, Sapphie and I felt like we could take on the world! Which is why, two days later, we went to go see it AGAIN

After our second and equally awesome viewing of Wonder Woman, we went on an adventure to the craft store. I got some embroidery floss to make my brother a Ravenclaw bookmark, and Sapphie had lots of fun meeting the baby rainbows!

Sapphie’s next big adventure was big first for me: fireworks! I hadn’t been in years, and was so excited to finally celebrate the 4th of July by watching the bright, beautiful lights. We watched from our camping chairs in a parking lot, and the show was magnificent! Fireworks have definitely upped their game since the last time I saw them. My favorites were the gold ones whose sparkles lingered in the background long after the other colors disappeared. Sapphie loved it when there were as many colors as possible in the sky!

I’d planned to send Sapphie along on her next journey after that, but then, something amazing happened… I found out that Heather Morris was going to be on tour with Dancing with the Stars. In my city. Read: I had the chance to see Heather Morris dancing live and in person. As a former dancer and forever Brittana fan, I brought this to my mom’s attention immediately. As a former (sane) dance mom who appreciated Heather’s dancing as much as I did (we are both still salty about her early elimination from DWTS), she encouraged my immediate purchasing of tickets.

Oh, but it gets better. At this point, the tour was mostly sold out. The only seats we could get together were VIP tickets… tickets that included a photo opportunity with select dancers on the tour. Meaning, not only would I get to see Heather Morris dance live and in person and very close… I might actually get to see her face to face.

Show day came, and Sapphie and I both felt ready to go into orbit. Sapphie continually reminded me that Heather is half the reason she exists, while I had to continually remind both of us to breathe. There wasn’t much to do before the meet and greet, but we had fun talking to other fans, imagining what the show was going to be like, and taking pictures.

Finally, they started calling people up to the line for photos. It was somewhat awkwardly placed in a separate room, so we had no idea who was going to be there until two women we’d been talking to came back from their photo. They named four people. Heather was one of them.

And then I died.

Thankfully, I managed to restart my heart when it was our turn to get in line. I felt like I might go into orbit yet again, so I tried to chill by mentally rehearsing what I would say to everyone once we were let through the doors. I’m glad I did this, otherwise I probably would have gone mute when I met Heather’s strikingly blue eyes from across the room.

Listen, ladies. She. Is. So. Beautiful. She’s lovely on TV, but in person? Wow.

She is also much tinier in person. I was expecting to have to look way up to speak to her, but I didn’t! She said, “Nice to meet you,” and stuck out her hand to greet me. I shook her hand and asked if I could hug her, and she gave me a hug and asked my name. Sapphie was zooming around joyfully in my pocket the whole time. I greeted the other dancers and then stood next to Heather for the photo. Sapphie was in the pocket right next to her, putting on her best smile!

The show itself was a lot of fun. In the second number of the show, Heather did a fun jive with a hip hop break in the middle. It was only about 4 counts of 8, but it was the best 4 counts of 8 in the entire show. She was so confident and powerful and cool, and I swear to Wonder Woman it was impossible to see anything else in the theatre she was shining so brightly. It was incredible. Wow wow wow. My jaw is still on the floor as I write this. Sapphie almost lost her clouds over it. A. Freaking. Mazing.

The next day was Sunday, so Sapphie couldn’t fly away to her next friend just yet. Instead, she helped me work on my crochet blanket. I’m making one hexagon for each day: the color of the hexagon corresponds to the outdoor temperature, and special days have beads on them. Sapphie helped me make hexagons for Wonder Woman, the fireworks, and Dancing With the Stars! It was a lot of work to do all at once… luckily, some friends swooped in to help her:

We had a little pep talk about all the adventures she was going to have, and then Sapphie got tucked into an envelope for her long journey. The next morning she was off to the east coast! I’m so excited to see what her travels bring :) Thank you everyone for being a part of this!

Love and rainbows,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Want to be a part of the Sisterhood? Read Sapphie’s Travel Guide and sign up! :)

#LGBT #wlw #queer #sisterhood #traveling rainbow #sapphie #sapphic #USA

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lobsters-on-their-heads · 4 years

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Got this done just a hair before my personal goal of January.

If you’re into writerly critique, please do let me know what you think works and doesn’t. This piece feels different for me than previous chapters, mostly because I’ve been focusing on other projects for several months, and because I’m focused on improving different elements of my craft than I was earlier this year. I also might have been inspired by different works outside of the OB universe, and whatever other media I’m into tends to leak in to my own work.

Also, I’ve been doing line edits for so long I no longer have any idea what English is supposed to look like.

#my writing #my fic #Cophine fanfiction #Continuing Travels of Cophine

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lobsters-on-their-heads · 4 years

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For the folks who asked for more Krystal Goderitch.

And, like, other stuff.

#Continuing Travels of Cophine

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lobsters-on-their-heads · 5 years

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This chapter is dedicated to the groups of suburban “pro-life” nut jobs who protest outside of my neighbor Planned Parenthood every single weekend.

Also, on a serious note, I think it’s time I took a hiatus from this work, for an unknown period of time. I have a few other projects that are occupying my mental energies, including a finished novel I want to publish and two very different novels that require a lot of historical research. I’m sure I’ll pick this fic back up for Part 4 - I’ve already written several pages of it, actually - but it could quite some time, and it’s better for me to just be on hiatus.

#continuing travels of cophine #my fic #writing

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lobsters-on-their-heads · 5 years

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A lot of talking

#Continuing Travels of Cophine #Cophine fanfiction

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lobsters-on-their-heads · 5 years

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In which I get to practice my French a little bit.

No, not like that. You’ll see.

This has also been wonderful procrastination. I should be prepping my class, or grading papers, or looking for a new job, but instead, I finished this.

#my writing #continuing travels of cophine #cophine fanfiction

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lobsters-on-their-heads · 5 years

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Continuing Travels of Cophine, Part 3 Chapt. 10

Fucking finally. I’ve been trying to get my novel out to literary agents, which has taken up a lot of creative energy on top of regular life activities and things (bipolar doesn’t always work in my favor, either). But, here it is!

You can read all of Part 3 here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16820221

Cosima didn't know how to write a condolence card. She sucked even more at picking one out, but on Tuesday that was her One Job.

At the card-and-party-goods store Sarah brought her to, the card section stretched over three full aisles, and the “sympathy” cards were ten percent of that. “Just grab a card,” she muttered to herself, “any fucking card.” But all of the cards she picked up sucked. Donnie Hendrix just lost his mother – the first person in his entire life who loved him – and the trite pre-written message on a two dollar piece of card stock was supposed to sooth his pain? Were the swoopy cursive letters and watercolor flowers actually supposed to comfort anyone? Or wasn't it all just a ploy to make those who hadn't lost anyone feel better about themselves? Like saying “look, I helped” without actually helping anything at all?

She picked up a card showing a tire swing at sunset. Always remember that every part of life is a part of God's plan, it said.

Cosima huffed. “Is cloning a part of God's plan, too?” she asked the card, and stuffed it back into it's slot.

Another read, Nothing happens without a reason. A whole bunch of Cosima's life experience contradicted that one, too.

Those who love us never really leave us.

“Way to rip off Sirius Black, yo,” Cosima told that card. As she suspected, JK Rowling was not credited with the message anywhere on the back.

She had no idea how close Donnie was (had been) to his mother. If (when) Cosima's mother died, there wasn't a card in existence that would even dent Cosima's pain. To make matters worse, in her search Cosima came across sympathy cards for the loss of a spouse or partner and she nearly fled the card aisle to join Sarah in the “summer fun” aisle with the pool noodles and plastic sand buckets. The two news alerts from Syria she got a few minutes ago really didn't help, and Delphine wasn't even in Syria yet.

Cosima was scowling at a card reading Don't cry. They're in a better place now when her phone rang. She crammed the card back in it's overcrowded slot and answered. “Hey gorgeous,” she said.

“Hey,” Delphine said. “Is everything alright? You said you needed some help?”

Delphine sounded exhausted, and Cosima chided herself. Delphine had treated two Turkish clones in two cities in two days. She deserved some time to herself. “Totally alright,” Cosima assured her. “Nothing to worry about. Forget I asked.”

“Euh, not very likely. What do you need help with?”

“Well, you seem like a classy lady, and so I thought – ”

Delphine's snorted laugh cut her off. “I'm sorry, what?”

“I have to buy a sympathy card for Donnie, and I have no frikkin' clue what to get, or, like, what to do when we see him later today.”

“Oh.” Delphine's mirth vanished. “Why are you buying a sympathy card? What happened?”

“His mom died. She had a stroke on Friday and she never woke up from the coma. Not, if you ask me, the worst way to go, but still sad, you know?” Funny how none of the sympathy cards said that: It wasn't the worst way to go, but it's still sad, I know.

“Hm.”

“Anyway, I'm trying to find the right card, and nothing seems right. Sarah doesn't know either, and the whole “sorry your mom died” thing kind of sent her to a bad emotional place too. Totally understandable, you know? She's distracting herself right now. I'd normally ask Alison, but obviously that doesn't work here. Scott's socially inept in these areas, even worse than me, and my mom's off the grid until June, so I can't ask her either.”

“I see.” Traffic rushed by on Delphine's end, and she said, “hang on,” a couple of times before the traffic noise ceased. “I'm not sure how much I can help, actually. I'm not exactly an expert in comforting phrases or what to say after someone dies. In English or in French, actually.”

Cosima sighed. “Well, you've gotta be better at this than I am. Like, what kind of card would you want if your mom died?”

Delphine laughed again. “That depends.”

“On what?”

“How she died, if she'd decided to talk to me before she passed, if she has a will...”

“Let's say there's no will, you were on speaking terms, and she died of a stroke.” Cosima had no idea about the will part, but assumed it didn't matter here. “In fact, you know what, scratch that. You'd probably want a card saying something like Guess what? She's dead.”

“In my case, yes, that would be fine. But this is not my case.”

“What kind would you want if I died?”

Delphine inhaled sharply, and Cosima kicked herself again. Delphine already had those nightmares. “I'd rather not think about that.”

“Yeah, fair. Ditto.”

“Cosima. What kind of card do you think you should get? What would the right one say in this situation?”

“I just want one that says, This sucks, and we all know it sucks, and we're here for you. None of this greater purpose, heaven and God shit. I mean, I know the Hendrixes go to church and all that, but... I don't know. It seems off base to me, and it'll be super obvious I don't mean it.”

“Don't they have any blank cards? You can write in your own message if you want.”

“I am not sure that would be better, actually.” She sighed again and held a hand to her forehead. Chances were, this would be their only conversation that day – it was dinner time in Bursa, and Cosima would be spending the next few hours with the Hendrixes. She should get the most out of her daily Delphine Time. Walking away from the cards towards the big store-front window, she asked, “How'd your day go, then? How was the treatment?”

“Fine. She's asymptomatic, as we suspected.”

Cosima smiled. “Nice of you to use the plural there. If I remember correctly, you're the one who convinced me not to drop clone fest to inoculate her back in March.”

“You weren't terribly opposed, though.”

“Mostly because I knew Alison would kick my ass.” Cosima giggled. “If only we'd known how Clone Fest would actually go! Alison might've been happy for us to miss it.”

“I thought you two smoothed all that over?”

“Eh. I guess. Forgiven but not forgotten, for my part.”

“Doesn't sound like you've completely forgiven, either.”

“I've forgiven enough to not bring it up again with her. How's that? I'm letting it slide.”

“As long as you're both okay.”

“I am fine. Alison's husband is the one I should be worried about right now. And you. I'm always worried about you.”

“Don't worry too much. Bursa is very nice. Rainy, but nice.”

“Oh, I'm sure it's nice. And it's not really Bursa I'm worried about, either.”

Delphine made a noncommittal noise. Cosima picked up a little animatronic Easter bunny from the store's clearance bin and pushed the button on its ear. While it danced around to its tinny robotic song, Cosima tried to think of something else to say – something other than “you know there have been chemical attacks in Syria recently” and “you know our security team can't really protect you from everything.”

“How's everyone else?” Delphine asked.

“Fine. Charlotte's still being Charlotte. Sarah's worried she's gonna fail her math class, so we're all trying to help her out with that.”

“Wait. Sarah's worried that Charlotte will fail? I thought she was strong in math.”

“No no no. Sarah's worried that Sarah might fail math.”

“Ah!”

“Too many shes, I know.”

“Hm.”

Cosima looked around to make sure Sarah wasn't in hearing distance. “I'm trying to kind of gently coax her into, like, an advisor's office or something. Maybe an academic counselor.”

“Sarah, you mean?”

“Yes, still Sarah. Like, it's weird.” Cosima looked around again. Sarah had moved on to the “Over the Hill” birthday aisle, where she was laughing at some tombstone shaped decorations. “She's obviously smart,” Cosima whispered to Delphine, “and she's doing everything she's supposed to do. She's working her ass off for these classes, and she just can't get it. Me and Scott are still tutoring her like once a week or so, but I dunno. I think she needs something that we're not able to give her, but I don't know what. She just keeps saying she's too stupid to get it, but I don't think that's the case.”

“No, I don't think so either.”

“She was joking the other day that someone must've dropped her on her head as a baby.”

Delphine was silent on the other end, but in the silence Cosima heard her thinking. The gentle tap of a pen or pencil gave it away. Before either of them to continue the conversation, Sarah came over and waved a “old man survival kit” at Cosima.

“Art's birthday's all set, then,” Sarah said. When Cosima just stared, she clarified. “He's turning 40 in a couple weeks.”

“Oh,” Cosima said. “Cool. Um. Send us the date, yeah?”

“Sure. He doesn't want anyone to know, but whatever.” She waved at the phone in Cosima's hand and raised her voice. “Hi Delphine!”

Delphine chuckled softly and said, “Hello Sarah” in a voice soft enough for Sarah to miss it.

“I should get going,” Cosima said into the phone. “I probably can't talk much later, but text me if you want, yeah?”

Delphine agreed to, they both said “I love you,” and Cosima hung up. Then she turned to Sarah. “How'd you know I was talking to Delphine?”

“Your face, mostly. Anyway, you ready yet? Where's the card? I wanna get outta here before I buy too much shit I don't need.”

* * * * * *

On Thursday, as Delphine travelled to Izmir, Cosima sat in their apartment and scrolled through job listings. The exercise was futile – she wouldn't apply to any of them and anyway, she didn't have her PhD yet. Her advisor sent back a list of dissertation edits yesterday, but Cosima had only made two of the smallest ones. More and more, every time she sat at the computer, her mind drifted. Some of it was the same old shit: anxiety over the state of the world and the nagging feeling that nothing she did amounted to much. And worry about Delphine. She always worried about Delphine. The job search began as a combination of those – worry that she'd never get a job good enough to give Delphine the kind of life she deserved.

Her family made sure to get her away from the Rabbit Hole for at least an hour every day now, and Cosima was not allowed to protest. If she did, they pretended to move in with her, loudly, until she left the apartment in frustration. That only happened once, though. Tuesday's outing was to the store and the Hendrixes, where Clone Club gathered to support Donnie in his grief. Yesterday, Cosima was back at Bailey Downs, to “help Helena with the boys” while the Hendrixes attended the funeral in Hamilton. “Helping with the boys” made no sense, of course, since Cosima didn't know what the fuck to do with one-year-olds except make silly faces once in a while, and Helena resented the obvious supervision. Cosima spent half of that visit riding Alison's bicycle aimlessly through the subdivision by herself.

Thoughts of the twins and the suburban expanse of Scarborough set Cosima's mind spinning again.

She remembered the sprawling, packed metropolises of Mexico City, Istanbul, and São Paulo. Those weren't even the biggest cities in the world, and still their size and scope took her breath away. She remembered the bustling streets of Lima and Cairo, and she'd never stopped being amazed at how many distinct individuals existed in the world. Little Arthur and Little Donnie were unique, just like every single one of those people. Just like Delphine. Just like Cosima and each of her sisters.

She shook her head and tapped her own cheeks. Another cup of tea was in order, but before she got up her phone emitted a weak little chirp – another news alert from Syria.

“Fuck it,” Cosima told her laptop. Grabbing her coat and purse, she went outside, leaving the job search and dissertation edits behind.

The Syrian news alerts never made Cosima feel better. Even the occasional cease fires failed to get her hopes up, because most of them devolved into violence again, or yet another armed group entered the scene to fuck shit up again.

At least Cosima now checked those alerts only from outside of the Rabbit Hole, with a view of sky and trees rather than drab walls and a moldy ceiling she lacked motivation to clean herself. Ignoring the chirps from inside the apartment didn't change the situation, but it helped Cosima keep her head screwed on, and it kept her from telling Delphine to just stay far the fuck away and send someone else to cure the Syrian Leda.

Not that she hadn't thought about it. The trouble was that no one else would do it – not the way it needed to be done, or with the appropriate discretion.

Cosima ordered a chai latte at the cafe around the corner, sat near the window, and gave in to her brain's desire to dwell on bad news for the day.

Fighting in Aleppo schools bombed in Hama clinics shot up in Ghouta ISIS kidnapping people in Deir ez-Zor

Hundreds of thousands of people were trying to flee with the clothes on their backs, and the only people trying to get in were ISIS recruits, aid workers, and foreign military “advisors.” By the time this whole shit show ended, Cosima doubted there would be anything left of the beautiful country she'd wanted to visit as a teenager – encouraged by her tenth grade math teacher who just happened to be Syrian and also super fucking hot. But that was now beside the point. The point now was that a different super fucking hot object of Cosima's affections would be in Syria within the next couple of weeks. Their purchase earlier that year of “kidnap and ransom” insurance only made Cosima feel worse.

Skimming over the most recent alert from Damascus, a pair of chimes interrupted her. The first was from Qamar, their remaining Arabic translator, requesting a phone call in a few minutes. She did that often, preferring to relay messages longer than five words verbally rather than in writing. Cosima sighed and agreed.

The other was the semi-daily update from Nabil back in Djibouti. Like most of the children's texts, it was short and random – a picture of a filthy street cat in the shadow of a trash can that he'd captioned “friienb.” Cosima replied as she usually did, with a picture of her own – her chai latte, framed by a glass sugar shaker and a napkin holder. She added a short and simple message of her own. “Lunch.”

She kept thinking of talking with Qamar about Nooran's nieces and nephews. Djibouti was certainly safer than Yemen, and now that Nooran was cured their life could improve somewhat, but Cosima couldn't let go of Nooran's request – to take the children to Canada with them. She also couldn't forget the role they'd inadvertently played in Cosima's current situation by sending a picture of themselves with the flag of the Muslim Brotherhood in the background. It wasn't their fault, and she would never – could never – ask them about it.

Her phone rang and she answered before even checking the caller. “Hello, this is Cosima,” she said.

“Hi, Cosima,” her mother said, a certain heaviness in her voice.

The dissonance between her expectation of Qamar's chipper accent and the sound of her mother's voice made Cosima reel. “Oh. Hey, Mom. I thought you were out to sea right now?”

“Well, we were.”

“Okay. That doesn't sound good. What happened? You said the boat was having some issues, but – ”

“No, honey, the boat's fine. We got that fixed last month.”

“Okay...”

A garbled, wonky announcement sounded through the phone, like the announcements at airports or train stations, but filtered under water. Sally sighed and waited for it to finish before speaking again. “We're at the hospital right now.”

Cosima froze. “Oh shit. Is it your foot?” She'd been worried about that, about her mother going out to sea so soon after bunion surgery, but Sally said no.

“No, honey, my foot's doing fine. It's Gene.”

“Oh. Is he...”

“It's not his heart this time. He's very keen on everyone knowing that. He did not have another heart attack, and he's been taking his statins regularly.”

“Okay, well that still doesn't really tell me what's wrong with him.”

Sally sighed again. “Well, a couple of days ago, he started noticing blood in his urine. Of course, being Gene, he didn't say anything about it until yesterday, when he couldn't urinate at all.”

Imagining that made Cosima squirm and cross her legs in sympathy. “That sounds awful.”

Beeping in Cosima's ear told her Qamar was trying to get through. Whatever. Qamar could wait. Qamar probably didn't have a urinary blockage.

Sally went on. “Yes, well, after several hours of that, he agreed we should turn around and head for shore. Fortunately we were only about six hours out from Eureka, so here we are.”

“So, what, Dad went like eight hours without peeing? Holy shit.”

“Closer to twelve or fourteen, I think. He's on a catheter now and they're running some tests.”

“Jesus Christ, poor guy.”

“Yes, well.” Sally gave a few of her deep sighs – the kind that came from somewhere beneath her diaphragm and that Cosima was all too familiar with.

“Go ahead and say it, Mom.”

She sighed again. “Well, it's just – I know this has been going on longer than he says it has. The doctors were worried about his prostate last year, and sometimes Gene gets this pinched look on his face, you know? This pinched pained look and then he acts like it didn't happen and he's not in any pain, like I'm some kind of an idiot.”

“That... sounds familiar.”

“Oh, so you noticed while we were in Toronto a few months ago? You noticed it too?”

“Uh, no, actually, I didn't. I was thinking of something else.” She was thinking of Delphine, wincing over the phone and over Skype and swearing that nothing was wrong, all the while having a cracked knee cap. “I think you and I have similar tastes in partners,” she told Sally.

Sally laughed. “Don't say that! Delphine's a nice girl.”

“Yeah, nice and stubborn as hell. Anyway. What's next? What's going to happen?”

“We're staying on land for a while. I knew Gene was really hurting when I told him we'd have to, and he didn't even argue.”

Cosima whistled. “Back to Berkeley then?”

“We'll see. I'll keep you posted. Love you.”

Cosima returned the sentiment and hung up. She needed to call Qamar and see what she'd turned up, but that could wait another few minutes. Pulling up her on-going text string with Delphine, Cosima typed, Would you tell me if you couldn't pee for twelve hours? After hitting send, she kicked herself. Over text, she wouldn't see Delphine's face when she read the question, and in regular messenger it was impossible to delete texts.

The phone call with Qamar lasted four minutes. Samira, the one Leda remaining in Syria, still resided in Douma, but had no cell phone or internet access. All the information Qamar had was word-of-mouth, from the cousin of a friend of Samira's husband.

“I tell him, you see her next month,” Qamar said

“It'll be a lot closer than that,” Cosima said. “Delphine's scheduled to meet the security team there on May 9.”

“May 9? Okay, I tell them tomorrow. I talk them tomorrow.”

“I mean,” Cosima cautioned, “there's also always the chance the date could change. Just like the others.”

“Yes yes. I know.” Qamar had been with them since they got the Leda List, or close to it. She knew the deal, even if she never quite understood it.

Off the phone again, Cosima let out a long, slow breath. Different news would have been welcome – that Samira had fled along with her Syrian Leda sisters and Delphine didn't need to go there at all, ever. Or maybe that Samira was in some unique position to hop over the border into Lebanon for a day or two and get treated there.

Not likely.

Finishing her drink, Cosima debated a trip to the aquarium or to see Scott at the university, where he was working on nanotechnology. She'd just settled on visiting Scott when Delphine's reply arrived. Yes, I will tell you if I can't pee for 12 hours but only on one condition.

That was unexpected. What's that?

You have to tell me why the fuck you tried putting a robot worm in your face a few years ago.

#continuing travels of cophine #my fanfiction #cophine fanfiction

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