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m88n · 3 years

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geronimo!

part one of the playlist series

smut, comedy, fluff, college + fuckgirl au

a dinner date with johnny suh led to you indulging yourself in him, and perhaps, provided further incentive for you in pursuing deeper relationships with others once more.

►listen to it’s a vibe - 2 chainz, body language - big sean, like i want you - giveon

“Finally y/n has some time to see me, huh?” Johnny teases you as he settles on the seat across yours in a dimly lit diner.

“Hey, don’t make it sound like that,” You scoff, breaking into a wide smile.

“It’s just what it is, y/n, with you being in demand and all,” He says offhandedly as he starts browsing the menu.

You could only lightly chuckle at his remark, Johnny’s always been such a good conversationalist, and you find that his tendency to lean towards playful, flirty banter too compatible to leave alone. That’s how you finally decide to take up his offer on a dinner date despite mostly preferring to stay cooped up at home.

“How you been?” He asks you after maintaining a somewhat lasting gaze on you.

“How have I been? I’ve been alright, I guess—”

“Yeah thought summer camp did a huge number on you, you barely could walk to the bus after two nights of living it up and partying, heh. Remember Mina helping you walk. Great look on you by the way, but I was just a little concerned at the end. Maybe just a tad.” He lightly jokes, but you actually do sense his concern from the gentle tone of his voice.

You burst out in laughter from the utter embarrassment that all that really did happen in summer camp. Damn, you truly let yourself go that time.

“I’m all good, dude, don’t worry. Been through worse when I’m drunk,” You say matter-of-factly.

“…Not sure if I should be concerned or relieved, but I’ll take it.” Johnny chuckles.

You scoff, shaking your head. “So, we ordering or what?”

“Oh, yeah, so I’m assuming you’d be good with drinks too tonight?” He asks.

“Yeah, I’m down.” You respond.

“Cool. Let’s keep it under control this time, don’t want you puking five times a day like last time—”

“Oh my god, shut the fuck up, please,” You say, covering your face from the embarrassment, albeit being unable to suppress your laughter in utter disbelief of your own antics.

“It’s all good, y/n, you’s always a party,”

“Oh god,” You sigh out, in the midst of your chuckling.

After around two hours of eating lightly and drinking copious amounts of alcohol, you both find yourself mildly intoxicated as a result. Your conversations gradually become considerably more open and candid in nature, and it’s become of a harder task to keep your inner thoughts from pouring out in your exchanges with each other.

“Nah, but I really can’t believe she said that about you,” You say a little loudly, earning some attention from the customers near you two.

“Yeah, dude, like, she wanted to collect all the summer camp dudes like pokemans or something,” He says, chuckling, faint whiskers forming on his cheeks.

“That’s kinda fucked… That’d be objectifying y’all too. Like, I’m all for women’s rights and feminism and all, but same goes for you guys too, you know? You don’t deserve that shit,” You say in complete frankness, inhibitions nowhere in sight.

“…Thanks, y/n. That actually means a lot though. You a sweet gal, you know that?” He says half-jokingly.

“’A sweet gal’ what, are we in the 1950’s?” You say, laughing.

“Well, I mean if we were in the 50’s I’d still ask your ass on a date, that’s for sure,”

You squeeze your eyes shut, scrunching your nose as you vaguely pull a wide smile, sipping on your pint of beer.

“Yeah, I like spending time with you too,” You finally respond after placing your beer back on its coaster.

“Damn, thought I was gonna be left hanging there, phew,” He says, placing a hand on his chest to comedically exaggerate his relief.

“Coming on pretty strong, are you now, huh?” You say as you take a fry from one of the plates, munching on it.

“Yeah, I don’t know, sometimes it just feels like we gotta bridge that gap, yknow?”

“What gap?” You say, taking another fry from the plate.

“I don’t know, I just feel like, I gotta establish that we’re moving to the next step, you feel?”

“I mean, okay, yeah, I guess,” You respond, pupils lightly wavering.

For once in this exchange, Johnny sighs out, the brief silence making you look up to him in question.

“You know, y/n, I think you’re really attractive.” He finally says, lazily looking at you with heavy-lidded eyes.

“I mean, yeah, I think so too. Otherwise I wouldn’t be here.” You respond simply.

“What, you think you’re really attractive too?” He jokes, successfully defusing the slight tension that’s built up.

Laughter bubbles from your chest. “Nah, nah, dude, you’re attractive. I think you’re cool. I think we get along really well.” You correct yourself.

“Yeah? You think so?” He asks you.

“Dude, what’s with you, why do you need me to reassure you, isn’t it so obvious,” You ask in the midst of your chuckles.

Johnny just raises his hands in response, “I don’t know, you just never know, you know.”

Even though you’ve both carried your conversations in a lighter tone thus far, you nonetheless sense his feelings of uncertainty. And you’ve come to the slight realization that you’re probably not providing the responses he might specifically want.

“I don’t know dude, I’m really just taking it slow with these things, you know,” You say, casually taking another sip from your beer.

“And what does that mean, y/n?” He asks, also taking a sip from his pint.

“Like, you’re obviously really attractive to me, but when it comes to feelings, I’d like to think I’m a little slow to warm up these days. Because of this and that,” You explain.

“Oh, yeah, I’m chill with that too. I’m just worried I’d be taking you hostage with my eagerness to get to know you more than just a friend, possibly, you know?” He responds honestly.

“Oh, no, I’m down for, whatever, you know. Kind of, whatever,” You say, laughing at your attempts to put your own thoughts together.

Johnny laughs at you endearingly. “y/n, I’m also still figuring shit out, don’t worry. Like I’m not one to commit to feelings or whatever right away either, I honestly just hate if I feel like I’m feeling this insane chemistry one sidedly, you get me?”

You shake your head to physically shake off your feelings of confusion. “Yeah, okay, gotcha. Just know that, you know, if you ever ask me to hook up with you, I’d be down. That’s where I’m at, I’d say. You know, if ever you’d be good with that.”

Johnny smirks, eyes slightly widened. “Damn. Am I just a booty call to you now then?”

You laugh at his remark. “Dude, you know what I mean, come on.”

“Yeah, yeah, I do. That sounds more than good to me,” He scoffs, finally sinking into his seat relaxedly, all while smiling warmly at you.

As the night deepens, Johnny finds his hands on your waist, pushing you against the door to his apartment flat. Your hands find home on back of his neck, linked together and tugging slightly at his long brown locks. You’ve been kissing each other for a good few minutes ever since you both found yourselves alone in the elevator ride to his floor. You moan softly as he captures your lip in between his teeth, then briefly sucking on your lip to soothe the slight, yet pleasurable pain. He starts peppering kisses down your neck, firmly sucking on a sensitive spot, causing your eyes to roll back ever so slightly. Hearing your breathy moans gradually increase in volume, Johnny tightens his grip against your waist, digging his digits into your exposed skin, slightly riding your body-hugging top upwards. You were about to move to reciprocate his touches, when you notice rustling sounds from the elevator area, and you both knowingly look at each other. In what seems like the speed of light, Johnny takes out his keys from his pockets, before finally unlocking his door and letting you both in in a stumbling mess.

The moment the door closes, Johnny captures your lips in a heated kiss, firmly pinning you against the walls of his narrow hallway. You feel your whole body weaken in his grip, as he continues to trail hot kisses down your collarbone to the dip of your breasts. Unable to move your upper body, you nudge your knee against his hardened bulge, causing him to groan as he continues to slip the straps of your top down your shoulders, effectively exposing your chest. He teases you by peppering soft kisses around your nipple, causing you to squirm against his hold, as he’s purposefully avoiding your sensitive spot. You moan needily for more of his touches, and Johnny hums in response, continuing his ministrations against your breasts. He pauses to take a look at you between the long strands of his hair, the shadows further deepening the intensity of his gaze. He takes a brief gander at your desperate reactions, before smirking to himself in satisfaction. He finally takes your nipple into his mouth, causing you to whine against the touch—tugging his hair harder and jerking your knee against his bulge in response. He growls in response, before taking your hips to swiftly lift you up in a princess carry.

He carries you towards his bed as if you weigh as light as a feather, throwing you onto the surface with gentle force. He impatiently takes off his shirt, revealing the incredible musculature that you’ve always felt above layers of clothing. You can’t help but gaze at the glaring size of his toned biceps, feeling your drool seeping out of your lips a little. You shift your sights towards his abs, and you could see, perfect six packs sculpted onto the surface, as if the gods were to do that last-minute in an attempt to create the most sexually stimulating visuals for you. But no. Johnny probably just spends time in the gym. A whole lot, you might add.

“Like what you see, baby?” He asks you with a smirk, noticing you taken off guard.

“Damn. Spending time in the gym really doing you good, John.” You finally say after somewhat managing to come back to your senses.

“That’s what I’d like to hear, babe,” He says, before moving his way closer to you on the bed, eventually towering over your body with his gargantuan figure.

He kisses your lips gently whilst caging you against the pillowy surface of the mattress, allowing you to place your hands against his arms. Desperate to take in more of the warmth radiating off of his body, you lightly squeeze the surface of his skin as the feel and texture of his distinct muscles continue to pour liquid fire in your belly. You sigh onto the kiss, allowing the entrance of his heated tongue into your mouth. As your lips and tongue continue to entangle itself with each other, teeth lightly clashing, you feel the featherlight touch of his fingers slowly go lower and lower on your body, until it reaches the waistband of your skirt. He pushes your skirt down to your knees with little to no effort, before quickly slipping a finger into your panties. Your breath hitches at the action, and you notice him stop kissing you, choosing instead to observe your reactions with heavy-lidded eyes whilst wearing a slight smirk. After some moments of teasing around your entrance, he finally pushes a finger into you, causing you to take a sharp inhale, as Johnny gazes over your reaction amusedly.

“Damn, so wet for me, baby,” He drawls, finger prodding your insides, as he maintains his sights on your face. You let out a strangled mewl, before he lodges a second finger into you without any warning, allowing a soft guttural moan to pass your lips right afterwards.

“…Ugh, John, your fingers are so fucking.. thick,” You managed to say in between broken breaths.

“Wait until you see the real thing baby, you in for a real surprise,” He says slightly comically, suddenly taking his fingers out of your insides, earning a surprised sigh from you both from the shift in mood and the abrupt retraction of his digits. You finally let out a hearty chuckle from his whimsical remark, before observing how he keeps his gaze heavy on yours as he sucks his fingers fresh off of your folds.

“…Mmmm, never told me you’d taste this sweet,” He hums.

“Pfff, haha, alright, that’s kinda hot.” You respond honestly, albeit still quite humored.

He suddenly forcibly takes your black, skin-tight midi skirt down from your knees, along with your panties, earning a startled yelp from you. He bunches the skirt up with one hand, taking your arm with the other, and continues to tie your wrists above your head with your skirt.

“….Damn, okay,” You mutter in response, feeling your core heat up in anticipation. You rub your thighs against each other to soothe the need for any friction in between your legs, before Johnny rests his large palms on both your thighs to stop you. You look up at his face, only finding him wearing a playful smirk on his face.

He snakes his palms towards the bottom of your hips, before gently hoisting your legs upwards, propping them firmly on his broad shoulders. You feel him gripping your legs firmly, his muscles bulging from the slight force, as he digs his fingernails onto your exposed flesh. He looks at you with a hungered gaze, before moving slightly forward to lightly suck on the skin of your thigh, teeth and tongue grazing your delicate skin. You whimper lightly at his touches, feeling limp from the helpless state you’ve been reduced to.

He lines his crotch with your entrance, before noticing that he has yet to unzip his pants. He quickly fondles with the zipper to his jeans, swiftly freeing his hardened member from the confines of both his jeans and his briefs, tossing his clothes onto the general direction of the floor, before reassuming the position he was at prior. Your jaw slackens at the sheer size and girth of his rock-hard length, tip reddened and angry, seemingly ready to burst at any time.

“Oh… F.. Fuck,” You mutter to yourself, not noticing that you’ve done so out loud.

He looks at you through his loose strands of hair, smirking once you’ve met his eyes. “You ready for me, babe?”

“I mean… Fuck, yeah… But…. Will it fit though?” You ask, genuinely puzzled.

He scoffs, “I mean we’ll just have to see if it does. Don’t think you could get any wetter than that,”

You blink, still amazed at the sheer size he’s sporting. “…Shit.., yeah, come here baby,”

He moves to gently lift your hips, aligning it with his length, before taking a brief look at your face for any confirmation. You let out quickened breaths in immense anticipation and a dash of slight fear—the good kind, you might add—and upon noticing this, Johnny touches his forehead with yours, smiling at you.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be gentle with you,”

If you weren’t so distracted by his insane size and the fact that you’re about to be broken in by the large object coming at you in plain view, you would’ve really noticed the way your heart skipping a beat at his gesture.

You finally feel the tip of his member nudging your folds, followed by Johnny slowly moving his hips forwards in order to sink himself into you. You wince, feeling your insides completely stretched in ways you’ve never felt before, letting out a helpless, desperate whine. Noticing this, Johnny captures your lips in a brief, hot kiss, before firmly anchoring himself with his arms on the mattress to fully sheathe himself into you.

“F…Fuck, hold on, I feel so full—”

“Almost there baby,” He mutters, beads of sweat trailing down his forehead.

“..It’s not fully in yet?!” You breathily ask, not believing that he’s got more to go.

“…God, you’re so fucking tight,” He groans in between gritted teeth, and you notice the way his veins bulge even more prominently on his arms, him seemingly trying his best to go slowly for you.

His arms move to grip your legs resting on his shoulders, in an attempt to hold himself from lodging his length too quickly into you. You finally feel the rest of his girth splitting you open and filling you up in your absolute depths, and you could only let out a strangled, guttural moan as he finally buries himself into you.

“..We in?” You ask, panting and heaving from the fullness.

“We in, balls deep.” He responds in between ragged breaths.

You were about to chuckle when you feel him slowly drag his length from your folds, making your eyes roll back, your own hands gripping each other in the confines of your skirt.

“God, baby, you’re taking me in so well,” He gasps to himself.

“…I.. I sure hope so,” You pant breathily, trying not to come undone with the way he’s filling you up to the brim.

He pushes his hips forward in a quick snap, drawing a throaty whimper from you.

“Sorry, I can’t help it—you feel too good,”

You respond in an incoherent string of moans and whimpers, as he decides to continue assaulting your pussy with an inconceivable speed given his unbelievable length. Your legs quiver and your toes curl from the way he’s hitting all your sensitive spots with each stroke. You’ve never felt this good before, you couldn’t believe you hadn’t fucked him any earlier. As he angles your hips to fuck you even deeper, your legs still hoisted on top of his shoulders, you quickly feel the contents of your brain replaced with white noise, thoughts only gathering in the way Johnny’s cock making you feel all stretched out, your limbs weakened from total loss of control. You feel so much pleasure being this dominated by Johnny, by Johnny’s tall, muscular figure, by Johnny’s burly cock. His cock, his damned thick cock filling you up with each stroke. As he continues to fuck you senseless, gripping on your legs sure to leave bruises the next day, your eyes roll back even further and your vocal cords let out unintelligible noises, while tears begin to form on the ends of your eyes from being fucked so good without being let up even for a second.

He drops down to kiss you, tongues and teeth clashing, effectively muffling your moans as he continues to stretch the depths of your sensitive pussy. He takes one arm, gripping your wrists on top of your head harder as to further emphasize the power dynamics in this situation. You feel tears stream down your face as you continued to be assaulted in your helplessness, yet feeling your entire body bloom with heated pleasure.

“You good, baby?” He asks in between pants, swiping a tear from your left eye with his thumb.

“..I-I’m good, i-it just feels too good..,” You manage to whine out in between broken breaths.

“..Fuck,” He breathes out.

Then without so much of a warning, he takes your hips with both of his arms, flipping you over on all fours, earning a startled whine from you from the loss of his fullness as well as the sudden change of position in your body.

He lightly grasps your head with one hand, pushing it downwards against the mattress, while he hastily pushes his member against your folds, once again filling you up with the fullness you’ve come to miss for a brief moment. You elicit a throaty groan from the feel, feeling your body once again experience that familiar loss of power that comes from being dominated by him. He fucks you roughly and quickly, groaning with each thrust, and you once again feel your consciousness rapidly slipping from your frail grasp. His hands move to your breasts, allowing him to fuck your brains out while firmly grasping onto them, completely making you feel like you’ve been reduced to nothing more than his personal plaything.

“Fuck, baby, I’m close, Fuck—”

“Cum on my back, John, fucking paint me white,” You cry against the mattress, slightly sobbing with tears painting your cheeks from the incredible pleasure.

The moment you feel warmness trickle down your back, you couldn’t recall any other time in your life that you’ve been made to feel this good. You reach your own high almost at the same time, feeling yourself black out a little—the only thing you’ve managed to feel with your senses is your entire body quivering, the lasting imprints of pleasure left from Johnny’s cock, and your own delicious wetness you’ve grown to feel between your thighs.

You’ve finally come back to your senses when you discovered that Johnny has taken the time to clean yourselves up while you lay on his bed motionless for a good several minutes. He lays on the bed close to you, gently tucking strands of your hair behind your ear.

“..You alright?” He asks you with a slight concerned tone, eyes fixed on your expression.

“…Yeah… Yeah, fuck yeah, I’m alright, John…. I’m great…” You mutter with a smile, eyes closed, stretching your body to revel in the bliss you’re feeling post-intercourse.

He chuckles, looking at you basking in the pleasure still. “I’m glad. Cause it felt really good to me. Was kinda scared I’d break you there,”

“Are you serious? You didn’t even give me a second to breathe, John, don’t give me that,” You say with a smile on your face.

Hearty laughter bubbles up from his chest, and you’d be lying if the sight of him looking all sweaty, sexy, and incredibly cute didn’t cause a slight skip in the way your heart is beating. You could only fake pout as a response, not too sure how to respond to him, not too sure, perhaps, how to respond to yourself.

He quickly ruffles your hair, before placing a chaste peck on the tip of your nose.

“You were gripping me so tight, though, don’t lie, you wanted it as much as I did, too,” He says teasingly, looking at you straight in the eyes.

You roll your eyes in response, not being able to suppress the smile breaking onto your lips.

“Shut up. It’s been a while for me. And didn’t know you were sporting a monster cock,”

“y/n! Language!” He calls out to you teasingly, yet not being able to stop himself from laughing, whiskers forming on his cheeks.

“Really, John? After all that?” You ask, chuckling with him.

“I know this seems a little generalizing, but thought you’d have more action. I mean. You’s sexy. Just curious though. Was it a matter of choice or…?”

You gently push Johnny’s head with your hand in a joking manner. “Dude, cmon,”

“Haha, sorry, sorry, nah, it was just a question, you’re obviously free to answer or not,” He says offhandedly while chuckling.

You scrunch up your face for a moment to deliberate whether or not you want to open up a little more. Something that you’ve come to know about yourself—that it’s much easier to open your legs to someone you’re attracted to rather than to pry open the crevices of your heart. But you see how Johnny’s genuinely attracted to you. Not your body, not you as an object, you. Even as a friend, even as anything. You consider that it wouldn’t be a bad idea trying to make yourself more emotionally open, because otherwise you wouldn’t even take the step to do it yourself, with no one else prompting you to do so.

“It’s a trust thing—” You start, and Johnny’s sights gently snap onto you, winning his complete attention. “I’ve been through relationships and hookups that completely shat on my feelings of trust, you know. Long story short, dudes have made me feel like an object that guarantee their feelings of security and power, nothing more, nothing less.... You know how things could go. It’s like my mental health didn’t really matter—”

You shift your gaze to Johnny, taken aback from the undivided attention he’s giving you and the lack of surprise he exhibits in the sudden shift of your tone.

“…And I’ve been wanting to work on it, but the more I try, the more it eludes me, I guess. The more I try to get to know more people, the more I realize the method I’m doing it isn’t the right way. I keep trying to welcome people in, but they could only come as far as the front door. It’s like trust is a paper, and once it’s been crumpled, it’s damn near impossible to get it as smooth as before.”

Johnny keeps his gaze still as you keep trying to explain yourself, prying some of the truths open from the depths of your heart.

“That’s why I just found relief in knowing that if, from the start, I’ve only made it known to others that the front door is as far as they’re gonna go, I think it’ll be alright. No one’s gonna be hurt big time, or anything like that—so that’s where you came in, I guess. If that made sense.” You finish.

He smiles at you, and looking into his warm brown eyes, you really do feel like you’ve found comfort in him. He makes you feel safe, as if you’ll be fine, just the way you are, the way you want to be—however you choose to be.

“Thank you for opening up to me, y/n, must’ve been a big step there,” He says gently, ruffling your hair with affection.

“Thank you for making me feel safe enough to, John, it really does mean a lot to me.” You respond with a big smile, your eyes turning into beautiful crescents. A slight warm blush creeps onto Johnny’s cheeks, and he averts his eyes for once in this conversation, being taken aback from the sight of you.

He clears his throat, managing a slight smile. “That’s alright, I care about you, y/n, that’s what friends do,”

You smile from the unconditional comfort you’ve been allowed to feel around him.

“I get it though. Trust really is a rickety thing. I’ve been there too, so, I do get it. But you know, what? What better way to kick this human dilemma in the ass than to get to know more good people around you. Or at least, try to, I suppose.” He says lightly.

You narrow your eyes, unsure of what he really means. “What are you proposing..?”

“My birthday’s coming.” He responds.

“Oh. Okay, well, happy almost birthday! I guess—”

“I’m holding a party on this apartment’s rooftop on the day of. I’ll be inviting some good company. Some people from the camp—Mark would be there. You do know Mark, right?”

You narrow your eyes once more, trying to fetch an incredibly vague memory of a “Mark Lee” in your memories from within the summer camp. Some hints of a sprained leg, a hasty need to connect—you decide that yeah, you do perhaps know him. Not that well at all, though.

“Or is your 3-day streak still messing with your memories?” He teases, whiskers apparent.

“Hey!! I’m not that bad… Or maybe I am. I barely remember him. Dang..” You say, palming your own face.

“You literally had a moment when you just talked to him in the corner during one of the nights. Too hammered, I take it,” He says, laughing.

“Yeah, shit. I guess I’ll have time then to refresh my memory a little. But really though, thanks a lot for inviting me, it’d be cool if I could come.” You say with a smile. “Is it gonna be a big party?”

“No, not really. Just inviting people I feel would be cool to celebrate my birthday with,” He says, smiling back at you.

“Awe, I’m cool to you? Haha thanks Johnny boy!” You say whimsically while wearing a smirk.

“Johnny boy, alright, that’s a new one,” He chuckles. “Damn, of course I’d think you’re cool, I literally pried your pussy and heart open in one go wassup,”

You pinch the bridge of your nose to recoil from Johnny’s sense of humor you could never really get used to. In a good way, you might add.

“Sure, alright, no objections there.”

319 notes · View notes

lesbianrobin · 3 years

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steve

favorite thing about them

the way he’s such a sucker for kids and he’d do anything to protect them... like it makes me wanna cry all the goddamn time he loves his children so much he risks his job to sneak them into movies and he risks his life to protect them and he risks his reputation to be a good big bro to them... it’s just so much and i can’t handle it.

least favorite thing about them

genuinely cannot think of a single thing i dislike about steve. like yes he can be a whiny little bitch sometimes but he KNOWS when he can be a whiny little bitch and when to suck it up for the sake of others... he’s literally perfect!

oh wait i hate how many polo shirts he owns. absolutely despise it. so that <3

favorite line

this is so fucking hard but i’m gonna be decisive here and say “We’re not gonna die. We’re gonna get out of here, okay? Just—you gotta let me just think for a second.”

it’s not a huge line but it’s like. i just think it’s so representative of who steve is as a character yknow? he’s goofy and romantic and he’ll be dry and sarcastic and bitchy all day long but when shit gets real his Only concern is the safety and wellbeing of his friends, and he puts that on himself. he consistently makes it his job to save those in need of saving, even if nobody’s asked him to, and i think that quote from when he was literally tied up, beaten and bloody on the floor in a bunker thousands of feet underground... i think it’s just so him.

brOTP

steve and robin baby!!! steve and dustin are cute and i love them but like... steve and robin have literally changed my life they are the parents i’ve never had the siblings everybody would want and the friends everybody deserves i don’t know a better duo

OTP

nOTP

do i even need to say it

random headcanon

steve always says that he never gets sick. and he truly believes that in his heart of hearts!! he absolutely gets sick just as much as the average person if not more, but he just always does some insane mental gymnastics to explain away whatever symptoms he can’t flatout ignore.

he’ll be like hm i think i haven’t had enough servings of veggies today that’s why my head is spinning and i slept with the ceiling fan on last night that’s why my throat is so sore and i think that stray cat must have gotten in my car at some point and that’s why i’ve been sneezing all day lol what bad luck that all of those things happened at once <3 lol how craaazyyyy <4 no i’m not sick i don’t get sick henderson mind your own business

unpopular opinion

steve was justified in breaking that camera like sorry i love jonathan but steve ABSOLUTELY should have done that!! nancy was WAYYY too forgiving about it and i think the show kinda mishandled that whole thing by depicting steve as the Mean Bully when he was literally just. saying hey don’t take fucking creepshots of my shirtless girlfriend through my bedroom window you weirdo. and taking away jonathan’s ability to take those creepshots. like it was a reasonable response in my opinion.

song i associate with them

the way i literally have a sixteen hour long steve playlist and now have to pick one song. scream. i’m gonna go with... i am steve by STEVE. no this is not a joke pls go listen to it.

favorite picture of them

tiny steve on the counter my beloved...

#thank youuuu!!#asks #em talks #steve harrington

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nukenai · 3 years

Text

Gotta love that my brain’s like “never talk about your legitimate body dysphoria that really overwhelms you sometime, it’s not a gender-related issue so no one will take you seriously and everyone will get mad at you!” but like, the couple of times i’ve mentioned it to people their general response is “i really don’t understand that but i want to support you”. I DO feel so weird talking about it because like what kind of conversation starter is “i feel dysphoric about existing in an organic body and wish i had cybernetic parts” like wtf. I gotta wonder if part of it comes from my body being so broken and barely-functional, but I do know that a lot of it is an aesthetic thing because... in terms of IRL I am really borderline REPULSED by the human body (there is a VERY dramatic line between reality and fiction tho because like ooga ooga fake boys). I don’t like looking at myself in the mirror at all, literally the only part of my entire body that I’m remotely ok with are my eyes, I think they’re pretty, but I seriously want the rest of my body to be completely consumed by hellfire lol it’s badddddd

I guess I’m a little sore from the time I tried talking to one of my coworkers about it and he got all “you won’t be able to Feel things physically if you have ROBOT HANDS” and it’s like that’s not really the point obviously what I’m talking about is a total impossibility anyways, and it would be technology that would be able to recreate that. I don’t want like prosthetic limbs at the level of technology we have for it RIGHT NOW that is not what I’m talking about

But anyways I have this nice pair of robot-print leggings that are very nice but I’ve kinda been looking forever for some kind of top to wear. My sister sent me this cute top with like circuit-y print on it tonight, idk if she knows my Issue with all this but she was like “I thought of you!” because I am a renowned Robot Person yknow. But I started looking and found this cute crop top on etsy for like, raves and shit lol so I’m considering that.

Obviously like most issues like this it’s not 24/7, and I don’t exactly want my entire body covered. I’ve got 5 tattoos and I rather love all of them; definitely getting tattoos has been a huge help in me feeling comfortable in my body and liking to look at it. Oma was super upset with my giant Wind Fish tattoo but it’s one of my favorite parts of me now. I have 2 on my right leg, one on each shoulder, and one on my left wrist.

this is just a rambly vent post i need to make once in a while to help myself feel better. i have a playlist of music for this, songs that have synesthetic qualities that help (hard to explain) but other than that my only real coping tool are those leggings which are getting pretty beat because of how much I’ve worn them.

i weigh 108 pounds and i’m basically a skeleton with skin on it anyways so it couldn’t be that hard to make me cybernetic right, why isn’t it The Future mannnnnnnn c’mon

anyways so my favorite of my self-insert fanfics, in terms of my own representation in it, is my TMNT “Space AU” where I just hang out in space with Honeycutt all the time and my arms were replaced with cybernetic ones that get upgraded eventually. Then later I get my legs blown off because, there’s a war, it’s a long story, anyways i get fun robot legs too and it’s great. it’s my favorite self-design and is what I wish my true form could be lmao. tmnt space au supremacy. anyways

#being human....... not a fan

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smoljamswrites · 5 years

Text

BTS as your best friends:

I’m kind of proud of this and it’s my first one so yeah. If you like it please like or reblog, it’d mean the world to me. Thank you! x

KIM SEOKJIN

okay hands down Jin would be such a good best friend

He’s very protective of you

10/10 would get triggered if someone hurt/upset you

comforts you by putting on a funny movie and chills with you on the sofa or tells you an endless supply of his dad jokes

If you go shopping with him, it’d be like a father and child moment

he keeps telling you to stop messing with stuff on the shelves

continuously jokes around and tells you to put things back

and will definitely ask you what you think he should eat next on EatJin

actually, when he does EatJin you’re usually behind the camera just lying around on his bed or whatever, keeping quiet and playing games on your phone

because I get the impression that Jin loves it when he’s got company and he’s in someone else’s presence

asjskjskjsjs does that even make sense

like he just wants you to be there

even if you ain’t doing anything together

you’re just doing your own thing while he does his

he loves that

also because he’s a Mario fan, and he can be extra af, I think if you guys couldn’t decide who got to choose, between the two of you, something like which takeaway you should order

then you are playing Mario Kart and the winner gets to choose

and boi boy does he get competitive at Mario Kart

if you do win though, expect to witness a spluttery loud-ass Jin

not that he genuinely cares that you get to choose the food

I mean, he loves food so whatever you choose he will eat anyway

but he gets chaotic because he knows you find it funny

he’ll do anything to make you laugh

believe me when I say Jin lives to see you happy

being your best friend, he’s seen you upset and at your worse

which upset him in return

so he makes it his mission to make you smile and laugh when you’re with him

MIN YOONGI

Lets you chill in his studio whenever you want

you even have the password

you just walk in most evenings, pass him some food and drinks, and try your best to help him with whatever he’s working on this time

he appreciates this so much

you still annoy him a lot but lets be honest he wouldn’t want it any other way

the other guys often say that you and Yoongi are like a couple

surprisingly Yoongi doesn’t really care that they call you guys a couple

matter of fact, it probably doesn’t help the situation that you and Yoongi are a l w a y s cuddling

Like if you are on the sofa watching a film with the guys, you best expect his head to be on your shoulder, face nuzzled into your neck, arms draped over your stomach, by the end of the night

he just finds you comfy

similarly, if you are with him in his studio and its really late

and you refuse to leave without him because you know he’s tired too

he’ll be all huffy for a bit, but neither of you end up leaving because you’re both so stubborn

instead you’ll end up on his lap, your face on his chest, while he continues to work

and when he’s finally done, if you look too exhausted he’ll just take you back to his place and let you stop there for the night

you always beg him to teach you the piano

“but Yoongi you’re the piano god” “go away y/n”

he insults you everyday but only because he loves you and he knows you can handle it because you insult him right back

you balance each other out perfectly

he’s calm and collected

you’re more bubbly and giggly enthusiastic

both of you are equally savage though

normally all you do is either hang out at his place or his studio

if you do go out then it’ll be at night, where it is typically quieter

you’ll go get a coffee or some food and just drive around, talking for ages and listening to music, time running away with you

so much sass omg

JUNG HOSEOK

Takes you shopping and judges your fashion choices

when he comes back from tour, he’ll have lots of gifts for you even though you always tell him not to bring you anything back

also if you used to be scared of loud noises well,, lets just say you’re not anymore

you’re used to his happy outbursts and sound effects

but you also know the other side to him that the public doesn’t see

ofc he’s not always going to be the happy, bubbly jhope you see through the cameras

he can truly be himself when he’s around you and he can relax

but when he is acting loud and chirpy he sort of rubs off on you

like your enthusiasm is fed by his enthusiasm

so good luck to those around you because they basically have to handle jhope x2

you get on so well with his family, especially his sister

with his sister being into clothes and fashion too, when you visit her with hoseok, she always compliments your outfits

and hobi will be smirking in the corner because (like i said above) he takes you shopping

and trust me, he would not let you leave that shop with ugly clothes

have you seen that man

he’s the fashion icon

so he takes full credit for every one of your outfits

always gets you to dance with him

he enjoys teaching you new BTS choreography

you’re both easily scared so if there’s a bug for example, the situation would go down like this

“Hobi you get rid of it!”

“No why should it be me? I think you should do it”

“No, i’m scared! You do it!”

“Y/N you’re closer to it, just do it!”

This arguing back and forth lasts for a few minutes until the bug flies/crawls away and you both run off screaming that its gonna attack you

so yeah, literally never a dull moment when Hoseok is your best friend!

KIM NAMJOON

Lowkey wants you both to match outfits but he would never ask you

could either be goofy with you or he’ll go completely psychological on your ass

there’s no in-between with Joon

You sometimes have to remind him that hes only human and reassure him he’s a great leader because I feel like he’d sometimes get in his own head and let the haters get to him, yknow?

You just gotta keep telling him he’s doing a great job and help him not let the stress get the better of him

You’re always there for him, supporting him

and he’s always there for you too

listens to all your problems

he gives the best advice

he’s also very protective of you

yknow when he clenches his jaw? or he raises one of his eyebrows? omg please tell me you know what i’m talking about well he’d do that if some one hurt you and he’d get hella mad

your family love him

they say he’s a very positive influence on you

he gets you to help him write lyrics because you’re his “muse”

he always convinces bighit to let you come on tour

even if he has to pay for you himself, you are coming

always leaves his broken stuff in your room

recommends you books to read (regardless of whether you actually like to read or not)

he is also the reason why you’re dirty minded

like forget expensive girl, have you ever heard ‘trouble’??

you’ll be with the other guys and you two just accidentally end up speaking English and the other guys are like..um hELLO?

PARK JIMIN

okay so I can imagine Jimin buying him and his best friend matching necklaces or something?

hear me out

its christmas day and Jimin passes you a small black box

inside is a necklace with a small key on it and engraved onto the key is “PJM 1995″

and you’re like “why have you gotten me a necklace with YOUR initials and birth year”

and then he shows you his necklace and it has your initials and your birth year

like this idea is so cute it makes me so soft sjweufbewjfn

will flirt with you just to make you laugh or maybe because he loves you or wHaTeVeR

he gives the best hugs

like BTS have already confirmed this in an interview

if you’re feeling down and need a hug, Jimin is your man

he is always with you

and if he isn’t, then he is texting you

you guys are inseparable

if he gets drunk around you then you’re gonna have this clingy, sappy, emotional, koala of a man wrapped around you for the night because he will not leave your side even for a second

its cute tho

but that also means he has a hard time during tour because you are usually not there with him

always drags you to his family parties and such

you love to go, and he knows you do, but you always whine when he asks you just to make him laugh

his mom loves you!!

not gonna lie she ships you both and when you go see her, Jimin has to beg her not to say anything about it to you

he loves to rest his head on your shoulder and you like to do the same

G I G G L E S

If you mention how short he is then good luck because he’s gonna chase you down and tickle you until he hears an apology

not that he really cares though

he just jumps at any chance to see a smile on your face

KIM TAEHYUNG

personal hype man

his camera roll is full of pictures of you

hates it when you’re sad

if you’re sad then just letting you know you’re in for a treat

he would organise a sleepover and would aim to cheer you up for the entire night

you always laugh at his pingu impression

you’re like Yeontan’s mom

yeontan l o v e s you

you’ll go to Tae’s house and as soon as you open the door, yeontan will run straight to you

you walk yeontan together at night whilst you share headphones listening to whatever’s on tae’s playlist

recommends you music because hands down this boy has the best taste in music FITE ME

He’s a big fan of skinship so people actually mistake you guys for a couple sometimes

plays with your hair all the time

your parents love him and treat him like he’s part of the family

your parents would genuinely love it if you two dated

Tae doesn’t mind it when they ask you questions like

“so are you two together yet?”

but you get annoyed purely because you find it so embarrassing

Tae just laughs it off and makes a joke out of it

“no i could never date y/n because her feet smell”

if you need a hug, he’s there

and he’ll sway you side to side and by the end of it you’re laughing so much because he’s hella goofy and you love it

JEON JUNGKOOK

Bullies you all day everyday (but you know he’s only joking)

sends you memes when you both should be asleep

he definitely has a crush on you or at least he has had one at some point in time

doesn’t stop teasing you

he’s so competitive and has to prove he’s better than you in everything

likes to hug you from behind

eats steals your food

you constantly steal his hoodies and he gets annoyed

but he can’t stay mad at you for too long though

he lives for your compliments

though it normally ends up with you playfully hitting his chest when his ego grows a little too big

he is never serious with you

always has his arm around you, it’s like a habit

always stares at you

always bursts into your room to hang out and then ends up sleeping in your bed

when he’s feeling cocky, he takes his shirt off and tries to make you feel his muscles

when he’s all sweaty from either going to the gym or dance practice, he makes it his mission to find you and get you to hug him while you’re screaming that he’s all sweaty and “gross”

the guys are convinced you two are dating

and Guk lowkey wishes you were but you didn’t hear that from me ;)

he wants you to play with his hair 24/7

being best friends with him means that, if you weren’t already into video games, then you definitely are now

#my writing #jk #jm #th #jn #jh #nj #yg #bts #bts headcanons #bts imagines #bts scenarios #jungkook #jimin #taehyung #jin #namjoon #yoongi #hoseok

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ellagracehargreeves · 4 years

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“The Spark” Music Playlist.

Here’s the Playlist on Youtube! The songs are also individually linked below!

I don’t have spotify or any of the other music things because I don’t listen to much music and I am BROKE!

(PLEASE GOD DON’T MAKE FUN OF MY VIDEOS IF YOU LOOK, I WAS A SMOL DUMBASS CHILD I SWEAR I’M LESS CRINGY NOW OK, I PROMISE.)

Love y’all. And I love these songs, Here’s why:

Lean on me - Bill Withers : Ella’s lullaby. Vanya started singing it to her around the age of 1 when she heard it on the radio at the 7/11 while she was trying to calm a fussy Ella. She began singing along with the song as a last ditch attempt, and it surprisingly worked like a charm. Ever since then, Cara and Vanya, mostly Vanya, sing it to Ella sometimes at bedtime, substituting the words with “Mother” and “daughter” when needed. It always calms Ella down.

Hazy Shade of Winter - Gerard Way (feat. Ray Toro) : …. Duh. Plus this gets me hype for Ella being powerful and happily violent and just being a part of the Hargreeves clusterfuck. ….This just slaps.

Cold Blooded - Khalid (slowed) : So this doesn’t fit entirely, but basically to me this feels like what Vanya feels when she’s empty, sad, and just blank, but then she sees her daughter being happy. It doesn’t erase the deep sadness within her, but it strengthens the resolve that she has. She will give everything she has for her daughter, just to make sure she’s warm and happy. Also this song makes me think of Ella forcibly cuddling Vanya on the couch when she is having a bad day.

(Slowed Down) Elastic Heart - Sia : Just…. V a n y a.

Dancing with your Ghost- Sasha Sloan : This song makes me think of Vanya and Ella and Cara, being happy and dancing together and making memories, but at the same time Vanya struggles with her guilt involving her siblings. She can see them sometimes within her girl, she can see them as she makes the memories. She feels like she doesn’t deserve to be happy, because she never has. She struggles with that feeling when she feels so happy her heart could burst. This song also makes me think of the relationship between Cara and Vanya, it just makes me think of Vanya trying not to cry over something but then Cara pulls her head down to her lap and runs her fingers gently through her hair and Vanya can finally let it out and it’s peaceful and happy.

(Slowed down) I found - Amber Run : Vanya…… If the commission wins.

(Her mouth is open in a silent scream as she cradles the small body towards her, this can’t be happening, no no no nonononono not her baby-

Why aren’t they helping her- Please, she’s hurt, can’t you see-?- She can’t tell the difference between her tears and those of the heavens, between the tears on her face and the blood on her hands-)

(She is no longer herself, she is a steadily growing drum-beat of pure pain and grief and power and she is not thinking but the very earth shall pay for the blood that has spilled, HER FLESH AND BLOOD-)

Somebody That I Used To Know (slowed down) - Gotye (ft. Kimbra) : The Hargreeves siblings and Vanya, after her betrayal is revealed. They feel like they should’ve been told about Ella, even if they weren’t close to Vanya at all, which is valid. But Vanya remembers them as being cold and shitty to her and tbh she’s only telling them for Ella’s sake. Plus this song is just melodramatic and I feel like it would fit the Hargreeves in any situation. Like, I can see Klaus or Diego stubbing their toe and then having this song playing in their head. They’re all extra as hell and this song works for any betrayal.

( slowed down ) lovely - Billie Eilish (ft. Khalid) : This is honestly one of my favorite songs, especially slowed down. I just listen to it while writing because it’s beautiful. But it also kinda reminds me of Vanya and her glass wall, constantly struggling with the feeling of being trapped and being stuck within her childhood abuse. She fights against it for Ella, her beautiful Ella, who gives her hope no matter how trapped she feels. This song is just a sad bop tho. Good shit.

Night Bus (Slowed) - Gabrielle Aplin : A happier sounding bop, but still slow and chill. I know it’s about lovers, but we ain't gonna take it that way okay.

“I’m on my way home to you for the last time” obviously doesn’t fit, because Vanya wouldn’t leave her daughter alone, ever, but this song kinda makes me think of Vanya gradually letting Ella go and letting her be her own person. Like, she’s still her mom, and this song also makes me think of the love between them. It makes me imagine Vanya watching Ella play in the park, or maybe watching her interact with the other girls at Gym, and thinking to herself “She’s got this. She’ll be okay. I don’t have to stay so close, she’ll still come back to me in the end even if I let her go.”

Also, this song is calming but happy, instead of most of these which are calming and sad. I needed a happier song, one that made me think of hugs and playing outside and having snowball fights and happy squeals and playing tag with wide involuntary smiles and flushed cheeks. In short: ‘Tis a bop. A happy bop. Happy times.

revenge (slowed & reverb) - xxxTentacion : Makes me think of Vanya, disillusioned, believing that her siblings have known about her powers this entire time. Makes me think about her thirst for revenge, to make them feel the soul-deep infraction against her. Makes me think of Vanya being torn between keeping her daughter safe, keeping her terrified daughter comforted, and her revenge. Torn between holding the one she loves most and punishing those who were supposed to love her. It makes me think of agonizing indecision.

IMPORTANT NOTE: I don’t know if this scenario will happen in the fic! I’m not sure how things will go down, and how Vanya will find out and react to her powers. I’m making this shit up as I go! But this song made me think, “What if?”

Dollar For Your Sadness - Unlike Pluto : (They hurt her daughter, her world, her Ella, She will DESTROY them, ALL OF THEM-)

JOLT - Unlike Pluto : The lyrics perfectly describe Vanya’s eternally growing resentment, her struggle of trying to forget her childhood, her trauma, her siblings, while raising her daughter. Trying to leave the past behind so she can move on with her Ella and Cara, her real family. They’re all she has now. Aren’t they?

(Also, Jolt. Electricity. Sparks. Heh heh heh. I’m so clever.)

Villain of My Own Story - Unlike Pluto : I’m unsure of this one, not sure if it fits. Vanya getting fed up with her siblings’ muttered remarks and snide comments? (*unconvincing cough* Diego and possibly Luther) Her just going “yknow what fuck all y’all you can suck a cattapilla dick” and being angery and pissed off? Tbh I just put this song in here because I discovered Unlike Pluto yesterday and went feral.

Maybe Vanya during the explanation, or her when she snapped at Diego? (The first time) or maybe it’s just her feeling so put down and invalidated and such a failure that she just goes “fuck this.” Vanya when Ella got bullied? It makes me think of the moments where she’s ticked off and her powers show up but just barely bc she eventually calms herself.

It makes me envision a young girl, possibly Vanya, idk, in tattered, dirty clothes, running down an alleyway in slow motion, and all I can see is the back of her hair flowing in the wind as she runs, the bottoms of her feet as she takes another step. I can see her checking behind her to see if she’s being followed, her hair whipping on her face so she can hardly see. It makes me think of frustrated anger, just an overall feeling of “FUCK THIS SHIT.”

Whatever. I listen to it when I write. It’s in the playlist.

Stay and Decay - Unlike Pluto : (Cartoon masks and gunshots. Flashing lights, ears covered tight, eyes squeezed shut, tears staining her cheeks, fear-)

(Mommy? Mommy! Mommy, no, nonono-)

(There’s dark blood staining her small, small hands- they hurt Mommy, they hurt her, she’ll hurt them- Mommy’s blood dripping- spilling, flowing- onto the wood floor and why won’t it stop-)

(-MommyMommyMommy- Please Mommy, I’m scared-!)

(She’s running after them, her feet hitting the ground, her mother’s blood splattering behind her, Mommy yelling garbled, broken protests- ringing ears, pounding heart, eyes sparking green, r a g e- )

(-she’ll get them, she’ll hurt them, she has to, THEY HURT HER MOTHER-)

Rocky Mountain High - John Denver : :) this is Cara’s favorite song, and my mother likes it as well :) Cara hums it a lot, and sometimes she sings it to Ella. Vanya’s not approving of it, because the song is about WEED, but she doesn’t do anything to stop it. Cara finds the hidden meaning hilarious when she sings it to the child.

everything i wanted (slowed + reverb) - Billie Eilish : Vanya has everything she needs, but she’s still drowning inside herself. Vanya has everything, yet she still feels so so dead. But Cara holds her, smelling like forest leaves, and Ella smiles at her, looking like beautiful starlight, and they make it better. They will always make it better, and she loves them.

The Phoenix - Lindsey Sterling : Ella. Ella, dancing in the air. Ella, hugging her mother tightly. Ella, sweet, gentle Ella- bright as the sun itself, Ella, powerful Ella. Ella, her happy light infecting everyone she meets, Ella, her excitement emerging in response to every new thing she encounters. Beautiful, beautiful, chaotic Ella- adjusting reality with a twitch of her finger. Ella, summoning a tornado full of destructive everyday things with a single tantrum. Ethereal Ella, dancing and laughing and smiling and hugging and throwing and yanking and crushing and destroying Ella. Just… Ella. Loving, Obliterating Ella.

That’s all I have for now! I gotta admit, writing all that out kind of drained me. I might reblog this with additions as I add them, if you guys want! Thanks for checking out this glance inside my process.

#music #writing music #writing #writing post #The Spark #The Umbrella Academy #Umbrella Academy #the umbrella academy fanfiction #vanya hargreeves #vanya hargreeves fanfiction #original character #original child character #ella hargreeves #ella grace hargreeves #playlist #fanfiction #fanfiction playlist

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she-adores-you-only-you · 5 years

Text

Listen to the sounds of my lame Heart!

It's hard explaining with words

I usually use a song for such a thing! As you know by now. I always always have a song ready for these events. Because music is my everything in the same way you are to me.

So a playlist for my feelings to you! Properly

https://youtu.be/2qc1JWNN7v8- All night!

All night is pretty self explanatory in my opinion >_> but please dont misinterpreted the only one in the world like this is more of a song in regards to our time during your shift. Really I should put it in chronological order...yeah I'll do that.) I won't lie I feel embarrassed doing this and making the post but I wanna push myself. I want to myself to be great for you. I want to be good for you. I want to be make you proud endlessly.

Songs of my heart .🖤

You don’t have to click the link unless you want to have the ability to go one by one.

https://youtu.be/hVa16y2Uoxg

(yes yes Friend like me~ Because wahaha there is only one great okamiko! Friend or Foe I'm unforgettable! And I wanted to be such a cool friend to you.) This isn’t included in the play but pft my cockiness from you being so much older and wanting to be my friend was unbelievable. I felt so cool that you wanted to continue to talk with me. I was like wahaha I must be cool after all to pull old men into my hands again after all this time.

https://youtu.be/D6TcKLwcQvM - Plastic Love

We both maybe saw it coming but this is a timeline of my heart. 🤔 anyway. TO EXPLAIN. I was super duper prepare to live like this for a few years. Maybe forever? I was a lonely weeb what can I say? :c no but honestly I used to think love and affection were something that would and could only hurt me so I was like heck yeah material things as you know! Material things were often a cover and thus the only love I believe in was the one for clothes and shoes. Clothes and shoes can never leave you, they can never disappoint you too much as you can fix it if you really need to. Who needs love where you can get hurt So I really related to this song hard hard but then something changed....so Then!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also, lets be petty and do stuff to plastic love one day just because for some reason when I listen to it, I imagine lots of stuff occurring lately

https://youtu.be/Dd_gDFsZd-4 - Rum pum pum!

Yeah this oof..... Very relatable to me.....

you still make my head hurt very very much btw. 🤨 Maybe I need to see what exactly you're up to as I still feel little teeth aches, you really are growing into your spot aren’t you. Please continue to grow well in my heart and Ill do my best to always always always care for you, I will do my best I promise. I’ll bear any kind of pain for you as you really make my heart something else. Because of you I couldn’t sleep as you filled my head entirely too much with your sweet words one second then your completely perverted statements that really exhaust me yknow. +_+

https://youtu.be/AG780VHd_Ww - Electric Shock

So this song ties for 2nd as oof you provoked me tsk tsk. You're waaaay too electrifying for your own good. Once again self explanatory but this was the point where I think I was still in much denial about all my feelings towards you, it was such a shock to come to terms with my feelings for you. HoNeStY let’s be honest, we both know if I could, I would deny that you made me feel so weak and gushy, but I actually love how warm you make me Kuya.

https://youtu.be/EyROOT3Pk2g - OHO Catching Villians

I feel as if I don’t have to write anything here, but at this point of time, this is definitely where it all began to line up and I could feel it in my bones. I wasn’t very happy with the fact that I definitely at this point caught feelings for you. This makes me cringe as I have to really sit and reflect on my emotional states with you and it isn’t the most fun thing to do especially when I remember how confused I was over it all, plus there was the fear of falling in the first place. But ehhhh sometimes you gotta a just let yourself be okay with making mistakes or you miss on things right? Thats what happen to em in the end I would say.

https://youtu.be/cfTQ9hFZlPQ - cheesy song....>_< embarrassed.

Yeah yeah this song, this silly song. Gah So yeah okay moving on this song makes me super duper shy but I really love it and it’s message because yeah I’m pretty sure I’m young and dumb, and I do stupid things when it comes to love, so this song was the song that make say why not. Lets go for it and try it out what’s the worst that can happen, especially as everything seemed so nice. So nice and perfect at times. Everything fell into placee so naturally and automatically, that I am still very surprised.

https://youtu.be/RVUv6Hw3WsE -Automatic

Honeeymoon phase, seriously oof. When I look back to this era, I just go haha yikesssss, you have feelings, ewww. But yes the song really works for this time frame beautifully. Personally, I think the honeymoon phase was especially cute, and when I think of it, I really the warmth of it all, but eww for all the goodness that was all gooey. Even when we started doing stuff it felt okay, I wasn’t as afraid of these things anymore and I truly think that cause of you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzkDSNN1Gr4 - Miracle love Translation

too shy to go into detail this information will be unlocked after maybe December I dunno >_< but I think its reflects how I really maybe feel about our relationship I dunno

https://youtu.be/QeUFmGLhI_s - MINE

THESE

https://youtu.be/nihtBqJ2lNU - Dark Red

ARE SELF

https://youtu.be/e2Qu7P6Ecfo - Galaxy

I debated on this song, but I think it works to reflect my spatial issues I have with our relationship but this is also definitely the song I go to for when I want to explain my desire for reassurance even if the method is a bit weird. I think it stems from my desire to be in small spaces but instead its a desire to have my focus on solely one person who I trust and I know is going to make me feel safe and sound.

https://youtu.be/ETZoSP-9do8 - Internet Luv

EXPLAINTORY AKA I ALREADY TRY TO EXPLAIN TO YOU HOW THESE SONGS MAKE ME FEEL. SO >__<

https://youtu.be/7Is5BKvaLL4

- Let’s Make History. Self explanatory per usual, but I think I want the words to truly come through. I want to make history with you, I’m not sure how I iwll do that just yet but i’M GOING TO DO IT ONE WAY OR ANOTHERS, BUT >_< MU CAPS ARE STUCK...

anyway yes lets make history and do something amazing together. I think I’m scared but happily excited where we’ll end up as everything with you is a safe mystery, I still feel unsure about higher risk but for you I am willing to work towards it, especially as I adore you very much.

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linos-teeth · 5 years

Text

i got tagged

in the 50 questions and the about me tag by @chngbok ty browse!! these are a lot of questions and idk who i want to bother with them (unless you wanna be bothered then consider yourself tagged) but in case you wanna know some random stuff abt me there’s a lot of that under the cut!

what takes too much of your time?

currently, fic writing for sure

what makes your day better?

uhhh ideas, music, skz (except lino bc he literally just makes me cry)

what is the best thing that happened to you today?

lino in the victory song dance practice? (wow there's a theme already)

what fictional place would you like to go to?

hmmmmm the arbor wilds, the crossroads, the forge, h-047c, watford

are you good at giving advice?

nah

do you have any mental illness?

uhhhh not theoretically (as in not diagnosed oops)

have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

luckily not

what musician inspired you the most?

boy i rly can't say, usually it's writers or games that inspire me and music not so much?

have you fallen in love?

most likely yeah

what’s your dream date?

idk man surprise me like...going out exploring and doing things i haven't done before that don't include any drugs or stuff also movies are good

what do others notice about you?

my hair (it's long)

what is an annoying habit that you have?

biting my uh...the skin next to my nails? and my lips? i guess?

do you still talk to your first love?

ha nah

how many ex’s do you have?

zero

how many songs are in your playlist?

i have 685 deezer faves

what instruments do you play?

piano, idk if recorder counts, used to play the oboe but...not any more

who do you have the most pictures of?

myself XD, my da/me chars, also random idol pictures for reaction memes

where would you like to go before you die?

uhhhhh a lot of places like...there's a lot of cities in europe i still wanna see and i wanna go back to paris and london and i also would love to visit like 294503 national parks in the us also maybe a desert (bc stars) and somewhere far north (for northern lights)

what’s your zodiac?

scorpio

do you relate to it?

nope

what is happiness to you?

just like...a content feeling? like...idk words for it but when you just stop and go like fuck this is rly good i'm rly comfy rn and not sad??? like just being good in your own skin?

are you going through anything right now?

not more than usual

what’s the worst decision you’ve ever made?

i made a few sucky time management decision throughout my uni time and still am so i guess that

what’s your favorite store?

what's a store

what’s your opinion on abortion?

i don't rly think i get to say much abt it while i'm not in a position where i can talk yknow? you should be allowed to but i imagine it's tough as shit too

do you keep a bucket list?

nah

do you have a favorite album?

A FEW there's wildness by snow patrol and mania by fob and wild world by bastille and miroh (that's currently tho that shit changes a lot)

what do you want for your birthday?

my birthday isn't happening for a while and what i want i kinda need before so xD for my birthday i wish i could be with my family but i won't be able to :/

what are most people’s first impression of you?

uhhhhh awk i guess which is right, also rly smart and like...organised which is wrong

what age to you seem according to most people?

apparently like 16, i always get asked when i finish school

where do you keep your phone while sleeping?

on my bed next to my pillow, stuffed under some plushies

what word do you say the most?

idk honestly i don't talk much probably some expletive

what’s the oldest age would you date?

idk man i'm not rly attracted to ppl much older than me never have been if it ever happened they'd prolly be like 2 years younger oops that's like the norm with crushes

what’s the youngest age would you date?

oh uh see above i guess like...currently i'm 23 so like? not younger than 20?

what job/career do most people say sould suit you?

they don't rly say anything abt that xD

what’s your favorite music genre?

uhhh rock? alt stuff? i love some folk and some pop too and i'm a slut for lofi

if you would live in any country in the world, where would it be?

here tbh

what’s your current favorite song?

u h h probably still chronosaurus! doesn't look like it's leaving that spot any time soon oops

how long have you have this blog for?

a bit over a month now?

what are you excited for?

how pathetic is it if i say my summer course? idk just...smth new i guess i'm looking forward to it (not to being away from games and photoshop)

are you a better talker or a listener?

listener

what is the last productive thing you did?

i finished vacuuming the house today

what do you want for Christmas?

s h r u g

what classes do you get the best grades in?

language stuff, music

on a scale of 1-10 how are you feeling right now?

a 4? maybe?

what can you see yourself doing in 10 years?

idk man i wanna go into speech therapy so?? that? or research even? but i gotta get into the masters first rip

when did you first get your heartbreak?

oh dear. probably like...in kindergarten when my crush was an absolute ass (so far, 80% of them have been there's a theme) i was pathetic

at what age do you want to get married?

idk man i guess in like 100 years when someone finally decides they rly want to put up with this mess

what career did you want to have as a child?

florist, author, actress

what do you crave right now?

hugs? and drawing skill

1. How tall are you?

i'm jisung-sized

2. What color are your eyes?

hazel

3. What color and style is your hair?

uhhhh dark blonde would be the accurate desc prolly? it's like...blondebrowngoldish and too long and i usually braid it and i have a super messy fringe

4. Do you wear glasses?

5. Do you have braces?

luckily not!

6. What’s your fashion sense?

casual and basic with a dash of experimental and sometimes a bit cutesy

7. Full name?

8. When were you born?

long, long ago, too long ago

9. Where are you from and where do you live

germany!

10. What school(s) do you go to?

no more school for me, i'm going to university

11. What kind of student are you?

the one that kinda gets by far too well for procrastinating so badly (all i have to say in my defense is that i'm anxious as shit abt everything)

12. Do you like school?

i used to!! like...the last 3 and first 3 years were chill

13. Fav subject?

music, history, english, latin

14. Fav TV shows?

i rly only watch b99 but i would be careful calling it my favorite since like...3 eps ago

15. Fav books?

my current fave is less by andrew sean greer (aka it was my fave last autumn and i've read like 3 since and they weren't super great)

16. Fav pastimes?

uhhh writing gaming music and lately, giffing too!

17. Do you have any regrets?

a couple

18. Dream job?

i mean i do still wish i could just like...do smth artsy like be an author or an illustrator but i'm bad at writing and literally cannot draw at all so

19. Would you ever like to be married?

yes absolutely

20. Would you like to have children?

kinda yeah?

21. If so, how many?

22. Do you like shopping?

only for a limited amount of time

23. What countries have you visited?

denmark, norway, france, the uk, spain, italy, austria, slovakia, we also drove through switzerland like twice

24. Scariest nightmare you’ve ever had?

uhhhhhh basically all of the end of the world/war scenario dreams i've had?

25. Any enemies?

does myself count

26. Do you have a significant other?

nah

27. Do you get along with your family?

yeah? we're not super close but we don't hate each other

28. Do you believe in miracles?

I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES WHERE YA FROM YOU SEXY THING no but rly i do

29. How are you?

not terrible

#wow i sound so rude rip that rly wasnt intended #tag things

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unproduciblesmackdown · 4 years

Note

1, 3, 6, 15, 17, 18, 32, 38

1. who’s your celebrity crush?

i’m bad at celebrity crushes b/c it works about the same as everything else i.e. like oh akd and wrol whomst my brain has been often enough focused on b/c it’s been billions time for over a year? i’m like /)u///u(\ sure lol, and then i gotta be like “damn who else exists” lol coz yknow it’s like, a-listers and other like proper big time celebs, first of all who are you people, second of all Shruggg......if i vaguely like someone and they’re in my zone of Interest it just naturally follows that i’m like, ah jeez. This person. whatever lowkey celeb-crushery goes on for me always stems from the Niche Interest Liking lmao otherwise it’s mostly like yeah i guess that person is like, kinda abstractly pretty. but then once i vaguely am like “oh This person” it’s not then like it’s so difficult for me to go u///u about it like sure yeah i’ll just be like “oh this tangentially-related person who has decent vibes is cute too, add it to the list, np” lol. like, there’s been other sorta-celebs i’m sure i’ve also gone like “oh yeah they’re also cute” about but like, i’d have to be directly reminded of them to yknow, remember those specific examples lmao i have never had any dramatic defining celeb crushes spanning eons or w/e. here i’m gonna try hard to think of Any Past Examples lmfao.........well unsurprisingly i’ve failed to think of any after a while but it’s not like it’s ever exactly a big deal.......just out here like boy lol some varied assortment of niche not-a-lister sorta public-ish figures could get it, nbd

3. rant. just do it

well as opinionated as i am you Know there’s a lot of things i could rant about but, as i mentioned above, i can’t Have Ideas or Think Of Things That Happened Prior If I’m Not Externally Directly Reminded so it’s like hmm damn what sets me off that’s like, more petty lmao or stuff i’m not already necessarily always talking about every day here already. well this isn’t a rant at all but it’s about all i can think of which is the other day i was like “hey i remember this one time at least a decade ago when i was listening to music with headphones and my roommate who’d put on music (like on speakers) plenty of times which was fine with me was like ‘you know you can play music aloud’ and i was like hm okay and i mean i can never make playlists b/c Songs I Like works the same way anything else in my brain works, aka i can’t just access that data w/o being Reminded Directly of specific examples, and the stuff i like to listen to is just like, whatever, and might be Me Wanting To Listen To A Song Like 5-50 times in a row sometimes, and also a decade ago my music tastes were sure Assorted and Various though not completely different from now, and anyways like i’m like alright i will play this music aloud and like three songs in baby driver by simon and garfunkel came on and my roommate was like hey never mind lmao and i was like yeah alright fair but anyways when the movie baby driver came out these idk 7 yrs later i never saw it but someone was talking about it and i was like ‘like the simon and garfunkel song’ and they were like yeah that plays in the movie and later on that former roommate expressed also liking the movie and i’m like well well bit hypocritical, are you allowed, remember when you Didn’t like that song” and that’s just a long slightly petty humorous story lmao not a rant but you know, all i do is go on rants @ no one, so we’re not really losing out on anything here

6. how many pairs of shoes do you have?

i have a few sneakers or w/e, a few pairs of sandals, and then like, a few (miscellaneous) shoes lol.

15. what’s a question do you constantly get asked?

i don’t think i get constantly asked much lmfao........i mostly just Recall things i’d keep getting asked that would be annoying. sometimes at college ppl would be like “Lol were/are you drunk” at me deploying just like, the basic level of Goofaround energy, but it does seem like plenty of cishet people have to get kinda smashed to get kinda fun. and i’d just be like, no, that’s just my personality, why are you asking. and then on the flipside, when i’m Not drinking, people like to ask why that is. i’ve yet to think of a great deflection but it hasn’t come up in a hot minute so it’s not exactly pressing. i think the answer here is simply to be a bit rude in return lmao like. it’s a rude question, mind your own business people

17. google the top song from the year you were born

apparently it might be The Sign by ace of base. a piece of alleged trivia i learned about that once is that whatever producer decided to produce it was originally uninterested in the demo for this song but was like, stuck in traffic and the cassette tape got fucked up and stuck on loop and eventually the producer was like “okay maybe this song is alright.” i guess that’s a mood b/c sometimes the first time i hear a song it’s like Eh but then the third time around or something i’m like oh nvm it’s epic i love it

18. rant about your favorite musician

i can’t rly say i have a favorite musician so for evading This rant prompt i’ll have to think of one for question #3 lmao......a challenge b/c even though i’ll rant about like a million things....i have to think of one of those million things. tricky

32. how old do you get mistaken for?

uhhh i used to get mistaken for older, e.g. offered wine lists in my mid-teens, and i wanna say maybe at some point recently i was mistaken for younger? but also i don’t rly remember that particular hypothetical occasion lol i can’t say that anybody’s trying to estimate my age lately ig

38. post a picture of the outfit you would choose if you could have any outfit you wanted

honestly at this point i just wear jeans / shorts and t-shirts. and i’m sweaty so rn my favorite shirt is just this plain black synthetic fiber tee. rayon and spandex apparently. hell yeah. i don’t like to spend much time deciding on an outfit and like At Most it’s like oh i want to bring it on this solo trip to a grocery on a random thursday at 6pm, let me spend like <10 min putting together whatever look. sometimes it’s like hmm yeah maybe if i had like, unlimited access to absolutely whatever fashion curation i wanted i’d get slightly more adventurous / try out different stuff but i’ve never really had occasion to do that & i’m entirely fine with this tees + jeans life so. well also i’d have more like tank tops / sleeveless tops b/c again, i’m sweatie

#thanks comrade #nothingunrealistic1

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