#but it’s more likely due to stress which is less like a cool house episode

[cartoonscientist]

“im not anorexic dan im just not hungry very often”

“that’s literally the clinical definition of anorexia herbert”

23 kudos

#this but unironically #tw disordered eating #shitpost #im fine guys im a digestive soldier #i ate tons of stuff today and im in contact with healthcare providers #i have an insane theory that a really bad heat wave this summer altered my gut flora #but it’s more likely due to stress which is less like a cool house episode

[spaceygoobert]

Penny for some thoughts about the clusterfuck that is Solar Opposites s2 (Contains spoilers)

Now that I am no longer drunk out of my mind and watched s2 four more times just to be sure I didn’t miss anything while I was crossfaded. it’s time to talk about it

Ep1 was great. It had more lore for shlorpians with a different perspective and i find it interesting that Korvo didn’t even know there were rich shlorpians. They also lived on floating platforms in the sky, like rich people lived in the clouds and working shlorpians lived on the ground, literally separating the two types of classes

The rich shlorpians said they wanted the pupa so they could get back to being rich, which means they don’t know that they will die, either way, they been jebaited

Did not expect shlorpians to be religious... kinda. but i’m not complaining.

The jokes hit hard and everything was kinda fast. The funniest thing about the season was a wacky plots 

I like how different Terry and Korvo are when dealing with negative emotions 

Terry becomes passive aggressive when dealing with negative emotions. specifically with anger. 

When Korvo basically changes everything about Terry in the Lake House episode, the only thing he doesn’t change is how Terry deals with negative emotions. Imagine not being understood and then becoming a goth because no one understands you, not even your partner, who is essentially the same person as you now. And it’s great.

I love violent goth Terry.

kinda shows how repressed he is to the point of “breaking”

Korvo becomes petty when dealing with negatives emotions too, but instead of anger, it’s sadness or when he’s hurt emotionally

S2ep2 reminds me of s1ep3, they both have something to do with parties and Korvo not being included and because he’s petty af he makes a complicated plan. the plot for the episode was just as mind-fucking as s1.

When Korvo’s sad/hurt, instead of talking about it, he makes a whole ass bill to ban Terry from having to hang out with his human friends because he spends too much time with them and not enough time with him. It isn’t until the shit hits the fan that he finally fesses up, which I find to be perfect. AND it ends with a uwu kiss. 

I find it odd and genius that Terry isn’t how you expect him to be. He looks like he wears his heart on his sleeves, yet he’s the one who shows less emotion than Korvo. Plus he doesn’t know how to express bad emotions and does the whole pretending that everything is fine thing

Could be due to being a laid-back person. By being laid-back, it means not worrying or at least showing it (which btw, if you express emotions, it means you care) 

Maybe someone hurt him enough for him to be passive aggressive OR it could be Shlorp, who the fuck knows

it begs the question, if he represses the bad feelings, what else does he repress?

Korvo LOOKS like he wouldn’t be the type to express emotions, yet he’s the one who is able to show sadness and anger— or a better way to explain, he doesn’t hold back on his emotions. He’s more open of the two adult aliens

AND THEY COME FROM THE SAME PLACE.

When Korvo insults Terry, he gets angry

When Terry insults Korvo, he gets sad and cries.

Korvo and Terry do things to cancel each other out. It’s cute.

Like when Korvo bans dinner parties and Terry still goes to them using sci-fi stuff to do it.

or when korvo goes to live with the other aliens and Terry trashes the house to get rid of his presence. Then mentions that Korvo’s dead

They bond over making fun of humans.

I’d expect this from Korvo, but Terry also makes fun of them too, despite wanting to be liked by them. Dunno, maybe Korvo rubbed off on him.

Korvo and Terry strive to get people to like them.

Korvo with the new aliens

Terry with humans

The way they do it is different. Terry acts like himself with humans, Korvo tries to act like himself but he lies to fit in

The wall, my god, the wall was amazing. The episode that focuses on the wall doesn’t take place inside the wall.

I never thought i’d feel for The Duke, though i expected he and Cherie would have some kind of relationship going on

The music, my god so good

Also the trope with the hero who unknowingly saves the villain.

Forest City, (Wood City?) I don’t remember what they called it

The plot for that was so ridiculous; they lose their car in the forest so they use a device to build a city so they could rent a car to find their car, but they end up getting lost in the city.

The fact that Terry took somewhat studied “pathfinding to prepare for life on dangerous aliens world”

I died when Korvo said he wanted to be a gangster, then he never actually becomes one and keeps getting chased by wolves. In the end, he was just a guy in a business suit

Jesse becomes a bad bitch like I knew she would

I can’t believe all four of the characters lost sight of their goal within a few days probably.

Also yumyulack jr

and the ref to wolf of wall street. Wait, is that why wolves were chasing Korvo because he was attempting to be a gangster? WHAT IS THE RELATION, besides being in a fucking forest?

Prostitute Terry and his tiddies

Korvo and Terry actually like being in each other's company

Red Goobler

My eyes were burned out of my skull, you know what i’m talkin about, the “sleeping through the alarm” scene, which got me second guessing myself that maybe it might be an alarm but it turns out they’re fucking. and there’s a wet condom on the ceiling.

the possibility of Korvo being pregnant? For s3? Impossible but still, it would be funny, then it turns out he’s not pregnant, it’s another red goobler, but he can’t tell if it’s from stress or the fucking

Terry is trying his best

I hope they don’t make terry into an idiot. Like in s1, he was dumb but not an idiot.

also terry admitting he’s too insecure to form his own opinions and Korvo liking the fact that he doesn’t have a firm belief

I am happy for that basic rat chick

Also if Korvo’s a bottom, and assuming Terry is one too, they don’t fuck because they’re both busy being bottoms?

After one night of implied sex, Korvo wanted to marry the red goobler. was the implied sex that good?

The apple pencil pro was just weird

Now that the solar opposites are dead, but not really, what now?

Can we talk about how they all went to fulfill each other’s goals more than their own. It’s sweet.

Lets not talk about Terry wanting to eat out Ms. Frankie, but Korvo does it instead, and he keeps going at it

Korvo likes eating out confirmed?

There was a lot of sexual stuff in this show. I dig it.

Also Terry being the first to die in the last episode, I dunno if I could see him killing his family. I mean I know he would but everyone else had some kind of contraption, except Korvo, who used magic instead, which is funny because he’s the most scientific one there, unless he uses science in it then it would make sense.

Mini Korvos look cute but I know they’re all little shits

i kinda wanna know more about Yumyulack’s past as a bounty hunter, like what did they do as a curriculum, was there even a course on bounty hunting? did Yumyulack only say that to sound cool? who knows! I hope s3 has Korvo and Jesse plots because I see them to be the most alike.

Dunno why, but all the solar’s head exploding was aesthetically pleasing and when they all get rebirthed again with their heads popping out of the tree, reminds me of the tree from pocahontas

This season had a bunch of sci-fi stuff and I love it. I hope there’s more sci-fi stuff in the future.

Also Korvo and Terry are both fucking idiots and I live for it.

#Solar opposites #Solar opposites spoilers #Korvo #Terry #Yumyulack #Jesse #Tervo #literally the longest post i ever did about gayliens

[heloflor]

So, given that I didn’t have much time to work on fics recently because school, I’ve decided to relieve some stress by making a random representation of how I imagine Cavendish and Dakota’s house in their time-period looks like. And since I have no plans to ever describe it in detail in a fic, here it is ! Though, given how bad I am with designs, showing the house is mostly an excuse to infodump on domestic headcanons.

Regarding the last names, I didn’t make a typo for Cav. I like to imagine the two getting married way before the events of the show, with Cav taking “Dakota” as a last name, mostly because he got several siblings in-law on the Dakota side who adopted him on the spot.

And about the representation of the house : yeah it looks like shit. Since I can’t draw, I’ve decided to do something rather quick using MSPaint but yeah, not the best thing in the world. Though, if I get back to playing the Sims 3 at some point and end up making a Dwampyverse savefile, I’ll most likely try to recreate that house and could share a few pics.

I also went with a rectangular house with one floor instead of some futuristic-looking thing, mostly because I have no imagination when it comes to design. Though, you could still use the excuse that they want something more “old-timey” given their job or that they don’t have all the money of the world so they chose a simple house for the small cost. But yeah, by the end of the day, the choice is mostly because I can’t design shit.

But still one thing in my defense : looking at episodes that take place in the future like “Missing Milo” or “First Impressions”, it seems that most buildings are square-y with the roof being the weirdly-shaped part, with B.O.T.T. being one of the few exceptions. And looking at “A Christmas Peril”, the buildings are definitely more wacky but it’s 20 years later so…

I could also mention that I’m a bit unsatisfied with how empty the living-room and the bedroom ended up being but I’m drawing a total blank when trying to come up with the kind of stuff Vinnie and Balth would have that are linked to their interests. Though, maybe the excuse of them not being often at the house works ? Idk. Let’s just say I have ideas for the “basic” stuff, aka what you find in basically every single middle-class house, but draw a complete blank for anything that’s decorative. Still posting a map of the house tho because I don’t really consider it a work in progress if I simply have no idea and may never do. I’m very bad at design so bear with me on that one ! It’s not only about the house, it’s also about the fluffy headcanons !

So here’s under the cut some random info about the look of the rooms and furniture + a bunch of headcanons regarding Vinnie and Balth’s lives in this house. For each part of the house, you first have the info about how it looks first and then the headcanons.

Those headcanons are made with the idea that Vinnie and Balth are married (duh) but also, for a few, that Vinnie has three siblings + a few in-laws that he has a good relationship with.

(very long post ahead)

General :

- They bought the house in 2162, 2 years after getting married.

- It’s in the suburbs, or at least what the future version of the suburbs would look like. In other words, the presence of a backyard is debatable.

- There could be a garage for their time vehicle, so that they don’t have to go to headquarters every single day. And if not an actual garage, there’s at least some space to put it. In both cases, it would be near the bedroom’s side of the house.

- While the walls outside would have that futuristic “metallic” look, the walls inside would be a bit warmer. At the very least, the inside isn’t “future metallic white”, especially with Vinnie having photophobia.

- The intensity of the lights in every room can be adjusted. That way, Vinnie can put the dimmest light and navigate the house without his glasses. This is mostly useful for showering and midnight snacks.

- When they went house-hunting, Balth was the one who insisted that they needed a place with those kinds of lights. This is also the same kind of lights that Vinnie had in his now-former apartment.

- You know how near the end of the episode “First Impressions” you have Balth going into Mr. Block’s office ? Well, the way the door opens in that moment is how the door opens for every room of the house, perhaps excluding the main entrance (I like the idea of their front door being an “old” one, aka the “normal” doors we have today).

- Every room would have a spot that can create “tactile panels”, like some holographic tablet that can be used to change the settings of the house, for example changing the lights or the internet or even lock the doors and blinds.

- In 2175, when they were forced to leave the future, Vinnie stole a device from B.O.T.T. that made him able to create some kind of forcefield around the house that only he and Balth can remove. So, even if they’re not there anymore, the house still is theirs and can’t be sold to anyone else. And before you ask why B.O.T.T. didn’t simply send agents to bring the duo back and force them to open the shield : the forcefield works with hand-scan detection and Vinnie convinced Balth to use their left hands, the hands with the wedding rings. So if time-agents come knocking, they could try convincing the agents to let them use the bathroom first and they could wash their hands and use the soap to remove the rings. That way, the scan wouldn’t work and the agents would have no way of knowing why.

    Living room :

- There’s more furniture than showed here like souvenirs from previous missions or some random stuff that belongs to them. I just don’t have enough imagination. : /

- Likewise, the corridor has a few pictures or posters, like pictures that Vinnie didn’t have the space to put in his memory room but still wanted to display. Also, I want to say that Vinnie would display pictures of his family (sibling, in-laws and nephews) but I’ll see him more as having an album for family pictures, or a framed picture on his nightstand.

- There could definitely be a carpet or two. They would either be modern ones to fit the fact that they’re from the future or vintage stuff found in some of their missions. One of the carpets would be under the coffee table. Another would be in the big-ass space between the living-room and the kitchen, or in the corridor.

- The style is a mix between old and new stuff, with also a few things related to their interests. Like, for example, the couch could have an animal pattern or something (AND BY THAT I DON’T MEAN REAL ANIMAL FUR).

- Speaking of the couch, after looking up “futuristic couch” on the internet, they would absolutely have one of those gigantic couches that have like a bed attached to them due to how big they are. Btw I have no idea which company came up with this design and I couldn’t care less. It’s just that the design looks cool and would fit a futuristic house.

- The side table is a floating square, given how we see in “A Christmas Peril” that tables in the future don’t have feet anymore (that’s one way to protect your toes).

- The floor lamp is more futuristic. It’s like a white orb attached to a lamp foot.

- The TV is attached to the wall. The remote is some kind of holographic tablet, kind of like the house settings thingy.

  - This is where Balth would spend most of his mornings and evenings when they stay home. He’d just be sitting with a cup of tea, most of the time also a book, with the sun illuminating the room, just feeling comfortable and peaceful. The side table/cube was bought specifically for Balth’s tea. He would also use the lamp while reading in the late evening, either for the peace of having little to no light and solely focusing on the book or as a way for Vinnie to be in the room with the lights at the lowest setting. And speaking of Vinnie, he would sometimes join his husband on the couch, lying down with his head resting on Balth’s legs (cue Vinnie falling asleep, leading to a frustrated Balth who needs to pee but doesn’t want to wake him up).

- Since there’s a mini-table for when Balth drinks tea, the table right in front of the couch is mostly used for Vinnie to rest his legs on.

- And speaking of fluffy headcanons : movie nights. From time to time, aka minimum once a month, probably more, the couple would be in their pajamas cuddling on the couch while watching a movie, with Dennis resting in Balth’s arms.

For the movie choices, Balth would choose science-fiction, especially if there are any Professor-Time-themed movies, but also historical fiction (for some reason I tend to see Balth as having a liking for history ? I think it’s because of the way he dresses + his small rant about pirates in “Game Night” ? Idk honestly. It’s mostly a random headcanon that’s here for some weird reason). As for Vinnie, it’s mostly animal documentaries (Balth falls asleep halfway through but Vinnie doesn’t notice until after it’s over) or animated/family movies (the future equivalent of D*sney, S*ny pitcures, P*xar etc. Which are movies Balth would enjoy as well). For some weird reason I’ll also see the two of them being into mystery movies (crime-solving movies basically).

And if they sometimes decide to watch other genres, I could see Balth having a liking for some romance movies, because for some reason I like the idea of Balth being sappy. Besides, the guy is passionate when it comes to proving himself at his jobs and takes them pretty seriously in order to reach his objective. And given how he can be insecure and sometimes feels like a ball of anxiety, who’s to say he isn’t passionate when it comes to love too ? And no, I don’t mean passionate as in “making out all the time”, I mean passionate as in taking relationships seriously and making it work while also wishing to make sure his partner knows that he’s loved, even if Balth isn’t really the best at expressing his affection all the time.

On a different note, to get back to other genres : Vinnie would probably like horror movies. Because if cuddling in front of a sappy movie is great, having your husband show his love and trust for you by clinging to your arm out of fear is even better, nevermind the fact that you’re as terrified as he is.

    Kitchen :

- It’s one of those kitchens with two walls of cupboards/cabinets, both on the ground and elevated. One of the cabinets is used entirely for snacks. Because Vinnie.

- The wall separating the kitchen and the living room “has a hole in it”. It’s like you have a small wall with cupboards, a hole, and a wall connected to the ceiling with a few cabinets. Basically, you look up “kitchen cupboards” and imagine that the space in-between is a hole instead of the wall (why is it so hard to explain something so simple ?).

- This would be the most futuristic-looking room of their house. Looking up at references, they’re that Pinterest post showing a room with white cabinets with round corners and what seems to be slide doors. This is pretty much how I’ll see their kitchen, except bigger, with a different wall color and with one wall not being here (see above).

- The table is floating because of course it does. The chairs don’t tho. Also the chairs are as futuristic as the rest of the room. And looking up the internet again, the chairs are shaped like chairs.

  - So I put a stove but tbh I’m not sure how much these two would cook, given how in the show they’re always seen eating out (granted they don’t have a kitchen in their ‘apartment’ in Milo’s time). And given how most things seem automatized in the future, let’s just assume that the house can do most of the cooking itself with like a robot (aka plot-convenience technology) but still needs the necessary furniture and ingredients for the recipes. Also, if there’s an issue with their cooking system, they’ll probably know a few recipes and can feed themselves (Vinnie’s oldest brother Enzie would definitely teach his younger siblings a few recipes, at least enough to survive on their own. And he would be more than happy to teach his brother in-law as well).

- I put 4 chairs at the table but honestly I could see them keep 2 at all times and put the others in the storage room, especially the times they get very busy with their job for a few weeks and don’t have the time for social life.

- At some point, Balth probably tried to convince Vinnie to have better food habits and tried to put his snacks on the higher shelves. Not only did it not work because chairs exist but also it led to Vinnie getting frustrated. So Balth dropped it. Though, he would still try to talk Vinnie into working out to stay rather healthy.

    Memories room :

- Vinnie’s personal space. He basically saw the third biggest room of the house and went “mine now” and Balth had no issue letting him have it (hard to say no when Vinnie’s eyes shine like that).

- He already had a memory room in his old apartment.

- Basically, Vinnie brings back souvenirs from his missions, along with pictures he took, and put them on display. For more information, I made a post about it a while ago, so check it out if you want info on it.

And side note : I learned more about ADHD and autism later on and found out that the correct word for Vinnie’s passion for animals is a special interest, not a hyperfixation. The main difference between the two terms is how long your interest last. The reason I used “hyperfixation” in my post is because 1. I didn’t know that “special interest” was a term that existed and 2. people with ADHD kept talking about having hyperfixations and most people see Vinnie as having ADHD. So yeah, my bad for using the wrong term. And while I won’t change the current text from my post, especially with someone in the notes correcting me (I don’t want them to look like an idiot), I’ll definitely add a few words at the end of the post about it.

 - This is where Vinnie spends most of his time when at home, trying to keep the room in the best condition.

- There’s a window in the room but Vinnie condemned it in case some of his souvenirs were sensitive to the sunlight.

- The room is made entirely of shelves, with like four-five rows on the same wall. The shelves are either integrated into the walls or they’re floating because future. In any cases, there’s nothing around the shelves, it’s just shelves with stuff on it.

- When you enter the room, one of the rows of shelves next to you has all the animal-related stuff he gathered before starting a relationship with Balth. The rest of the room can have a few animal-themed objects but the pictures tend to be more linked to him and Balth.

- Likewise, when you enter the room, on the shelf you’re immediately facing, there’s a miniature recreation of their wedding altar with their wedding picture in its center. The miniature is made out of the future equivalent of papier-mâché and the altar is themed around time-travel with objects from all kinds of time-periods and cultures. And for those who might ask regarding the picture : Vinnie has a black suit and carries the bouquet while Balth has a white suit. Both have a hat that’s basically Balth’s usual hat (with the Professor-Time goggles, because themed wedding) but colored like their respective suit.

    Balthazar’s office :

- The room has quite a few libraries but this is mostly decorations. Basically, this room is more of an 1800th century study than anything, especially a rich/royal study. Yeah, for some reason I see Balth as having an office that’s just “rich 1800th century” aesthetic. I think it’s from the headcanon of him being a runaway prince 🤔.

- So yeah. The bookcases are vintage, the piano is your usual black piano, the armchairs are vintage and tbh Balth almost never uses them because he’d rather read in the living room, and the desk is vintage, though the stuff on the desk is futuristic. Balth is up to date with the technology he’s using to work, he just likes the older aesthetic for the rest.

- On his desk, despite literally living with the guy, Balth has a framed picture of Vinnie (again, I want the stubborn gay disaster to be sappy from time to time, with his love language being small touches and attention to details like for example being able to quickly see the kinds of foods Vinnie like the most so that when he’s in a bad mood, Balth can get him that specific food to make it better ; or learning Vinnie’s body language to know when he’s upset or bothered by something).

  - Balth mostly spends his time here to make the reports on their missions or work some administration stuff when needed. When he isn’t at his desk, he’s there to play the piano.

And yes, I throw out the window that line from “Backwards to School Night” that indicates Vinnie doesn’t know about Balth playing piano but tbh I ignore or question quite a few things from this episode such as : the line indicating that Vinnie and Balth don’t live together in their time-period since Balth doesn’t know Vinnie’s weekend habits ; the line about how the ray thing age you down to 90% your current age and yet baby Vinnie seems younger than the parents despite his adult self seeming older; the fact that Melissa read a book 16 times in the span of 6 minutes ; the fact that it’s called a “age regressor ray” and not a “age regressor ray-inator” (seriously, I am the only one always expecting Vinnie to say “inator” and being disappointed when he doesn’t ?).

- The couple absolutely sing songs together with Balth playing the piano. Or at least Vinnie would sing a song in the middle of the living-room and have Balth be annoyed by it, only for Vinnie to hear Balth play the same song on the piano later and join him.

    Bathroom :

- Not much to say here. It’s a bathroom. It’s futuristic-looking. The mirror is a cabinet. The tub is round. The bin comes in and out of the wall. The clothes drier also irons the clothes. The toilet is glued to the wall. The walls are dark gray or dark blue or at least a darker color so that Vinnie doesn’t have to dim the lights to the lowest level when he’s showering. There are also several little lights along with a main one so that Vinnie can light the small ones instead of getting a headache due to the brighter light. During lazy/slow days, Balth would take baths instead of showers (and Vinnie would want to join him to make out). Balth may or may not sing in the shower (Vinnie definitely does). That’s pretty much it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    Guest/Storage room :

- Only used as a guest room when one or several members of the Dakota family are visiting the states and end up in the Tri-State-Area. So for 90% of the time, the room is used as storage.

- Bed’s not that big and very “squary”. Might or might not be floating.

- It’s mostly random junk that they don’t know where to put and don’t want to get rid of, like some stuff they got from their missions but that Vinnie doesn’t want in his room or some old things they want to give at a garage sale or that one Professor-Time body-pillow that Balth refuses to let go of while Vinnie just wants to trash the thing. The body-pillow being in the storage room in a junkpile was their compromise on the issue. Also, whenever someone might stay in the room, Balth makes sure there’s no way they will find the body-pillow (his sister in-law Bettie would never let him live it down).

- Not much to say here either aside from that.

    Master bedroom (the room in which the proportions are way bigger than the rest of the house because I have no idea what I’m doing) :

- I described the room quickly in my fic “nightmares” but yeah basically the room has several posters and pictures related to their interests, along with a bookshelf full of animal encyclopedias, time-travel facts, history books, Professor-Time fantasy books etc. There are also albums, whether it be family pictures or album of the two of them.

- Like for the living-room, there can definitely be more than what I described/pictured here. I’m just really bad at imagining the kind of stuff people would have in their bedrooms related to their interests. And speaking of which : at some point, there was the aquarium that Vinnie mentions in “Time Out”.

- Unlike the other rooms in which the windows have roller blinds (apparently that’s the english word for it ?), this one has curtains on top of it because Balth likes to open the window in the morning but he doesn’t want Vinnie to hurt his eyes. So with curtains, he can open them enough to light the room but not enough for the light to reach Vinnie’s face.

- The bed is pretty classic for a futuristic bed but with round edges and these two idiots definitely go crazy with the sheets design (animals, food, Professor-Time, past time-periods, stuff like that). Also, the bed is “open”. By that I mean that, if you look at futuristic designs, there tends to be some roof thing above the bed and linked to it. They wouldn’t have that.

- The nightstands are floating cubes.

- “Dennis’ chair” is just some random old wooden chair where Dennis stays most of the time. Balth almost never takes him during his missions and Dennis is a comfort object that Balth mostly talks to when sitting on the bed, movie nights aside. So the bear stays in the bedroom.

- The bookshelf would also be made of wood.

- The wardrobe is futuristic, with doors that can open by themselves with sensory detection. Also, unlike what that poor “drawing” shows, the wardrobe is “taller” than it is “larger”.

- The armchair is an egg chair.

  - They sleep

- They spoon

- Balth is the big spoon because 1. he’s taller and 2. he grew up sleeping while embracing a teddy bear and old habits die hard.

- When Balth goes to sleep or wakes up, he can’t help but play with Vinnie’s hair and give the small man a few kisses, feeling satisfaction in seeing his husband smile or try to pull away while laughing.

- Vinnie sleeps on the side closest to the window while Balth sleeps on the side nearest to Dennis.

- Balth’s nightstand has an alarm clock that’s basically just a holographic square with numbers on it, while Vinnie has an album or some random animal trinket. Vinnie’s alarm clock is not feeling Balth’s warmth against him. But if Vinnie has to use an actual alarm, the sound would either be some old-fashioned song or an animal noise (is this starting to get too much insistence on the “animal-loving” side of him ?)

- While Balth likes to read in the living-room, Vinnies likes it better to chill in the bedroom when reading. Also, during weekends and vacation days, Balth would sometimes read in bed before sleeping (yeah for some reason I really like the idea of Balth being a reader. I think it has to do with him being old or british ??? Weird brain is weird. And besides, if Balth reads, it would most likely be science fiction related to Professor Time). Vinnie uses this time as an excuse to cuddle.

- They have themed pajamas. Balth mostly has Professor-Time stuff (clocks, Heinz or Perry’s faces etc) while Vinnie has mostly animal-themed or food-themed pajamas.

- Vinnie sometimes sleeps naked in the summer. Balth is still trying to figure out how he feels about that.

- Random headcanon regarding Dennis : while he belongs to Balth who keeps him close when in doubt in order to vent or when he wants to get comfortable somewhere, I actually like to believe that, between the two, Vinnie is the one who talks the most to Dennis, mostly because Vinnie would just enter the bedroom and casually greet the bear, or he and Balth would have a dumb argument and Vinnie would playfully tell Dennis “Can you believe that guy ?” while pointing at Balth. Just, Vinnie being Vinnie and having random one-sided conversations with the bear.

And a little cute thing : while Vinnie really just talked to Dennis because why not, seeing the guy like the teddy bear so much would actually make Balth feel better about himself. I like to believe that grown-up men having plushies would still be seen as a ridiculous thing by most people (because toxic masculinity) and Balth got the habit of hiding Dennis when he was still trying to find the right guy for him. So seeing Vinnie have no issue whatsoever with the teddy bear and even liking him would definitely help Balth’s confidence, along with warming his heart.

- And since this post is all about headcanons : two things about phones and these two being sappy that have nothing to do with houses.

1. One day, Balth left his phone on a table and Vinnie decided to take a selfie with it because why not. After seeing that, Balth acted frustrated but ended up putting the pic as his phone background. Ever since, Balth’s phone background is a picture of Vinnie. The most recent one is from “We’re Going to the Zoo” with a picture of Vinnie holding squirrels in his arms while a third one is coming out of his pistachios-filled pants. The pic on the phone is a closeup, only showing Vinnie’s head and upper body. And for those who like angst, I’ll let you imagine how he must have felt having this as his phone background during the rogue arc.

2. Vinnie’s (numeric) phone password is 2703, aka march 27, the date of his wedding anniversary. The day is put first and the month second because Europe. Also, during busy weeks, this would be a good way for Vinnie to remember the anniversary.

(fun fact : I was trying to come up with scenarios for fics when I ended up thinking about Vinnie’s password and that number came to mind. So I just went “guess that’s their wedding date now”)

#Milo Murphy's Law #Vinnie Dakota #Balthazar Cavendish #Dakavendish #long post #VERY long post #headcanons #Flor talks #hey look I'm rambling again about random shit #I am SO. BAD. at design #but yeah #have a house #and random ideas #also have Balthazar Dakota #it sounds more and more normal when you think about it a lot #also Dennis Cavendish #or is it Dennis Cavendish-Dakota ? #now to edit the memory room post

[mycandylovefanatics]

Word count: 2.5K

Genre:Angst maybe

Warnings: May contain !!!SPOILERS!!! for Nath’s route if you don’t already know what exactly Nathaniel is dealing with? So if you haven’t gotten to episodes like 15 or 16 it might give it away but I think at this point everyone knows.

Reading guide: Y/N= Your name, H/C = hair color, E/C= eye color, S/C= Skin color, etc.

Notes:This oneshot is based off of episode 1 for Nathaniel’s route! I really wanted to touch on his inner feelings and what he might be thinking underneath the whole tough guy front he tries to put up. I felt like there was a lot more to it than we actually saw. 

Nathaniel makes his way down the street. He breathes out a long, stress-filled sigh. It had been a long week for him. Multiple meetings with his “boss”, who had him going all over town to finish deals, collect payments and recruit new “customers.” He was tired, and you could see it on his face. He had been told he wouldn’t be needed for the next few days, but that was always bound to change, so he didn’t count on it. He had just finished his last deal of the night, which unsurprisingly happened to be in a really shady part of town. Some months ago, he would have pissed his pants right then and there but after doing this so many times, he walked through these neighborhoods with confidence. The local thugs and buyers knew him and knew him well enough that the last thing they wanted was to get into a fight with him. He wasn’t invincible, but spending the past few years taking boxing classes and going to the gym definitely benefited him in this specific situation. He sighed again, a sleepy wave taking over his body. All he wanted was to get to his house, in the shower and right into bed with Blanche curled up by his side. Soon, he’s walking past the cafe windows. He’s caught up with the beautiful idea of sleep, when his thoughts are interrupted by a voice. 

“LET ME GO!!”

He stops and turns in the direction of the voice, and peers down the alleyway. He can’t see clearly due to the lack of lighting, but it’s no issue to make out the figures of a woman, and two men who are nearly double her size. He sucks his teeth, wondering to himself what girl in their right mind would decide to go down an alley alone at this time of night. He begins walking towards the figures, getting more agitated once he sees the two men refusing to leave the girl be. As he gets closer he recognizes the men, as the two goons he sells and does deals with occasionally, and rolls his eyes. Of course they’d be the ones he’d find in a situation like this. 

“She told you to let go,” he states, firmly.

The two men turn around to face him, puzzled but challenging looks on their faces. The taller man takes a few steps forward and questions, “And who the hell are you?”

Nathaniel gets a bit closer, about to respond, before he inspects the woman to find…you. 

He could almost swear that his heart stopped beating for a moment. You clearly haven’t noticed him yet, but as soon as he sees your fear filled (E/C) eyes, he knows. How could he forget them? The eyes that once looked at him with so much love, the ones he looked to when he was scared, when he felt weak? The eyes that kept him safe? He could no longer count the amount of times he had dreamed about you after you’d left. Less often now, but still every now and then. He’d go to sleep, and suddenly he was staring into your beautiful, bright orbs. 

Only a few seconds go by while he’s trapped in his thoughts but it feels like eternity to him. His face contorts into something of sheer rage as he reveals himself to the two men. 

“LET HER GO IMMEDIATELY!” He is surprised by the volume of his own voice, not realizing how enraged he had actually become. The two thugs back down as soon as they see his face in the moonlight, instantly feeling intimidated. They all knew what would happen if they crossed Nathaniel. Again, he wasn’t invincible, and he sure as hell wasn’t the boss, but neither one of them wanted to get on his bad side, for fear of ending up like the last guy who did. The shorter man puts his hands up in defense. “S-sorry man, we didn’t realize it was you!” 

“Yeah, man. Chill, we’re leaving,” the taller one says as they walk backwards towards the end of the alley before fully turning and sprinting away. Nathaniel has a look of disgust on his face as he watches the two of them leave, but the look is instantly replaced by a look of worry as he stares at you, your arms hugged tightly against your body and looking down at your feet. Your breathing is shallow and you don’t seem to be fully aware of what's happening. He walks up to you, and speaks in a gentle but firm voice. “Are you okay, did they hurt you?” 

No response.

“(Y/N), can you hear me? You must be in shock…” 

You respond, telling him you’re fine before your face perks up in confusion. “Wait… You know my name?” You finally look up at him, trying to make out his features in the darkness.

“(Y/N)... It’s me!” He says, stepping closer to you. Your eyes widen at the realization. 

“Nath?? Nathaniel?!” You exclaim. His eyes soften for a brief moment at the sound of his nickname. Sure, everyone called him that. But you had a sweeter tone with it, and would say it with love. But he pushes those memories to the back of his mind.

“Yep, it’s really me.”

You seem to zone out after he says this, which causes him to worry, but he doesn’t let that show on his face. “Are you okay? You look kind of in shock…”

“N-no, I’m fine. You came at just the right time, I guess…” you say. His stomach clenches at the defeated tone in your voice.

“Yeah looked that way. I’m sorry those assholes were bothering you,” he feels anger rising up again at the thought of the two men bothering you, and he has to stop himself from thinking about the many ways he wants to rip their throats out. He knew the guys he dealt with were shady, and he shouldn’t have been surprised to see them harassing someone, but the fact that they were harassing you, made something click inside him. 

‘“Well if it weren’t for you it probably would have turned out worse. So, thank you.” You look up at him, studying his face as if for the first time, your eyes travel up and down his body, noticing the drastic change in style from when you’d last seen him. You knew he always had a more edgy taste. He’d show that once he had gained freedom from his parents. But he looked just like your typical ‘bad boy’, and you were surprised. 

“You’ve changed quite a bit. I had a hard time recognizing you at first,” you say, still analyzing his face. He notices your eyes dart to the scar on his lip, he’s silently amused at what must be going through your head at that moment. He knew you tended to go with the more crazy, illogical ideas. 

“Yeah, but you’ve changed too!”

“Maybe but, not as much I think,” you reply.

He’s amused by your sudden fixation on his transformation over the years, but something tells him you aren’t all the way there. “Seriously, you just got attacked and you’re trying to play a game of ‘who’s changed more’?” He asks, raising a brow. 

He can see that what just happened is bothering you still, and diverts to another subject.

“You know, it’s cool you’re back in town. I’m surprised, I wasn’t expecting to see you again.”

He says this coolly, but there’s a hesitant tone in his voice. He sees you, he can clearly make out your entire form, but it doesn’t seem real even still. In the back of his mind he keeps thinking that somehow this is a dream, he’s going to wake up and be back in his apartment like it always goes. But the chill breeze on his cheeks let’s him know that this moment is, in fact, real. Your voice brings him back down to earth.

“Yeah, I’m really happy to see that most of the old gang is still around after all these years,” you say.

“Ahh, the gang… There’s definitely one, and unsurprisingly you’d be the one who managed to run into the only scumbags around.” He says ‘scumbags’ with a little more force than he means to, but you don’t pick up on it thankfully.

“Well, I’m glad you were there… seriously…” He can see your mind starting to drift off again.

‘Hey, why don’t we focus on something else?”,he suggests. But you don’t seem to hear him. “(Y/N), should I call the paramedics?” He tries not to let the worry show in his tone. 

“N-no, I think I’m just feeling a bit dizzy, that’s all.”

“Do you want me to walk you home?” 

“No, no… I’ll be fine, but thanks. I should be able to manage the rest of the way alone.”

He grins at this, a small laugh escaping from his lips. He had always loved that about you, even when you were scared you still tried to put up a strong front. He knew that you were still freaked out, but he didn’t try to persuade you to change your answer. He’d let you have your confidence. 

“What a warrior!”, he says while laughing still. “But seriously, if there is ever a next time, run for your life, or scream for help. It’d be a shame for you to get your nose busted before your first week of class even starts.” 

“Oh, come on! I was totally gonna beat their asses!” He laughs in response to this. “ Maybe you’d like a demonstration, Nathaniel?”

His heart flutters at the sound of his name on your lips again, but he quickly regains his composure. “Ooooh, she said my whole first name. I’d better run before the trouble starts,” he says, but then continues. “But seriously, next time run. Don’t try to go looking for a fight.”

You nod your head, and the two of you continue on with your conversation. He asks how you’ve been doing, how long you’d been back. He’s relieved to hear that it’s only been a few days, but still a part of him is disappointed that you didn’t try to get back in touch with him. He understood, but still, wishful thinking he guessed. He learns that you’d enrolled in an art program at the university and a small smile appears on his face. You’d always had a liking for art, even though you weren’t particularly artistic yourself. He remembered you talking about the possibility of that being your focus in school, but shortly after that conversation the two of you decided to part ways. 

Your small talk comes to an end, and he walks off briskly in the direction he came in. He can tell you’re standing there for a moment before he finally hears your footsteps begin to trail off towards the end of the alley way. He desperately wants to keep walking, but something holds him back. He looks over his shoulder to see you disappear around the corner of a building. He tries to force himself to keep going, taking a few steps further down the street, but curses himself when he’s turning around to follow you. He knew he wasn’t going to let you actually walk home alone, but he definitely tried. 

He follows you from a distance, far enough that you don’t hear him, but close enough to be at your side if needed. His eyes watch you closely, and his heart aches at the sudden urge to hold you close. For so long, for so many years you had been his safe haven. You were always there to help him, and at times you were probably the only one to be there for him. Every moment. He had no idea what he would have done throughout high school if you hadn’t been there by his side. He often finds himself wondering, if he would be in the predicament he was in now if you had been around to help him. More times than he could count, he found himself wishing you had stayed, wishing he had found some way to save your relationship. Over time, those wounds grew smaller, but tonight it was as if they had been freshly reopened. He couldn’t recall the nights he had spent having a panic attack, or those first few months when he was constantly paranoid and on edge. It was like his world collapsed as soon as you’d left it, and while he knew it was unhealthy to feel that way, to put that responsibility on you, his feelings didn’t change about it. He had a slight resentment for his friends distancing themselves from him, but he didn’t blame them. He probably would have too if he were anyone else. But you were here and you didn’t know. You didn’t know about the situation he had gotten himself in, you didn’t know about the questionable people he was constantly around and you didn’t know that he was a literal criminal whether he liked to refer to it that way or not. You didn’t know and you didn’t judge him, and as small as that was, it meant the world to him.

You soon made your way through the gates, and he watched as you walked across the campus grounds. He followed you up until you got to the dormitory building and released a breath that he didn’t know he was holding. He stayed there for a bit, just staring at those doors. He hated that all he wanted to do was run in after you, take you into his arms and never let go. He hated that after all these years you still had this effect on him, he hated how small you made him feel. 

He turns on his heels finally and makes his way back to his apartment slower than he initially was. The image of your face runs through his mind over and over again. The light smell of your perfume still wafting through his nose, which he noticed was the same perfume you used before you left. Your hair was still the same length, your eyes still had that same sparkle and his name on your lips still sounded just as sweet. While everything and everyone was changing around him, you were still the same and he loved that. And for such a fleeting moment, he could swear that everything was okay. Because you were here. 

And you made everything okay.

#mcl #mycandylove #mcl oneshot #mycandylove oneshot #mcl headcanons #mcl nathaniel #mclul #mclul nathaniel #nathaniel headcanons #nathaniel #nathaniel oneshot #mclul headcanons #mcl headcanon #mclul headcanon #amour sucre #Corazon de Melon #corazondemelon

[mistbornthefinal]

Madoka Magica Aniversary Analysis: Part2

Hunting for Witches

(here there be spoilers, proceed at your own risk)

We get a quick recap of Mami introducing herself and blowing away Gertrude’s familiars, before cutting to Madoka waking up in bed much like last ep. Only this time Kubey is being a creepy bunnycat like always and is looming over her bed. Cue Connect.

As the two of them are brushing their teeth in their weird giant bathroom Junko chastises Madoka for being late and not checking in with the family. We then cut back to yesterday as Mami leads Madoka and Sayaka back to her house. Honestly I prefer the original broadcast version of Mami’s house it’s emptiness laid the seeds for the reveal of the desperately lonely girl Mami actually was. 

(Shaft there was a point where this need to stop and we’ve clearly passed it)

Mami gives them some cake and then gets down to business about this whole magic thing. She starts with the soul gem, the source of a magical girls powers which is created when she forms a contract with Kyubey. Kyubey then lays out the terms in exchange for becoming a magical girl he will grant the subject one wish, according to him anything is on the table. But becoming Meguca has a price, a magical girl must fight Witches. 

Back in the present Madoka asks her mom what she would wish for. Junko says she’d oust a couple of board members at her company, maybe the president as well the man is by her account too long in tooth and yet still refuses name a successor. Madoka suggest the she might be the next president and you can almost immediately see the wheels starting to turn in Junko’s head. Madoka watches slightly nonplussed as Junko begins playing her next moves in Game of Thrones: Mitakihara office politics edition.

(Madoka has no idea the cataclysm her off the cuff statement precipitated) 

Hours in the past Sayaka asks what a Witch is and how they are different from magical girls. Kyubey replies (in retrospect very weaselly) that if magical girls are born from wishes than witches are born from curses. In addition Witches can not be seen by normal humans, but none the less prey on them sowing anger and despair. Mami chimes in that many seemly inexplicable murders and suicides are due to witch curses. Sayaka asks why this isn’t common knowlage. The answer Witches hid from humanity in unreal pocket dimensions, the labyrinths.

What happened to the girls earlier is they had wandered into a labyrinth, something that’s usually fatal to ordinary humans. Mami stresses that within the labyrinth even her life is in danger so the two of them ought to weigh their options carefully before making a contract. As tempting as wish might be the price could very well be death. Despite the danger Mami offers them a chance to accompany them on a witch hunt to see what it’s like before they sign up.

As Madoka meets up with her friends on the way to school Sayaka is quick to react to the bunnycat perched on her shoulder. In addition to being invisible to muggles Kuybey also acts as telepathic relay. Though the twos silent conversation give Hitomi the wrong idea

(this scene became a meme for good reason) 

In the classroom Sayaka questions the wisdom of Kyubey coming to school, given the girl who tired to ice him yesterday is in their class. Kyubey says Mami is in telepathic range (prompting her to chime in) and he doesn’t peg Homura as the sort to cause a public disturbance. Homura’s arrival in class triggers another flashback to last evening.

Specifically the part of the conversation were they discuss the transfer student. Mami confirms that she is another magical girl. This confused Sayaka, why would a magical girl attack Madoka, shouldn’t they be allies of justice. Kyubey corrects her Homura was after him, likely to prevent him from making new contracts. Mami explains that conflict among magical girls is a common occurrence. Witch hunting has it’s rewards and sometimes megucas will fight each other to secure them. Sayaka rather astutely connects her interest in Madoka with the presumed desire to keep competitors out of the picture. 

This whole cutting between past and present thing might be a little hard to follow in text recap form, but it does us a service by cutting our big exposition dump and giving us time to breath in between segments. This scene tells us everything we need to know about magical girls and witches (or so we think) and even gives us some insight into what Homura is about. After EP 1 left us with nothing but questions EP 2 has given us faith that this show isn’t going to leave us in the dark. 

At lunch which Madoka and Sayaka have decided to eat on their schools aesthetic as fvck roof, the two discuss the possibilities of a wish.

(this school is cursed and I love it)

Sayaka says that as tempting as a wish is she balks at the cost, then laments that most people should have a wish that they would risk their lives for and that neither of them do shows how privileged they are. There is a brief cut who we will later learn is Kyosuke before laments that there are plenty of people in the world who would risk their lives on a wish, so why them.

Before we can get an answer Homura enters the scene. The girls are startled but Mami’s voice chimes in revealing that she’s providing overwatch from a nearby tower. Homura says she’s not here to fight and going after Kyubey again is pointless now that he’s made contact with Madoka. She just want’s to know where the stand re:becoming meguca. She then reminds Madoka of her earlier warning, a warning that hopefully has not fallen on deaf ears. Madoka asks what Homura wished for but only receives a cryptic look. 

They ditch Hitomi to go Witch hunting and fail to correct her... assumptions along the way. When the meet up with Mami at the cafe we learn that Sayaka brought a bat, while Madoka brought sketches of magical girl costumes. 

(sketches drawn by her awesome voice actress Yuuki Aoi)

They go back to where Mami fought the familiars so she can pick up the Witches magic trail and track it to her labyrinths new location. As the girls are following the trail we cut to a woman stumbling into an abandoned building, a building that someone wrote a Faust quote on one of the walls in the original German (more on that when do a post on Madok’s Faust references). 

Bach with Mami and hangers on we learn she has been systemizing her method of witch hunting, checking the places already prone to violence and accidents that witches tend to frequent. According to her the worst place for a witch to be is a hospital where they can leach the life from those already weakened by illness.

The arrive at the abandoned building just in time for Mami to catch the woman from earlier when she jumps off the roof. Though uninjured the woman is cationic and marked with a strange glyph that Mami identifies as a witches kiss. She lead the two of them into the labyrinth through a portal but not before enchanting Sayaka’s bat. Homura is not far behind. 

Mami makes easy work of the familiars and after a series a surreal doors open we reach to core of the labyrinth and meet it’s creator.

(I’m not sure what people were expecting back in 2011 but I don’t think it was a butterfly rosebush monster)

Gertrude gets her name plastered on the screen in witch runes, setting us up for a boss fight, cue magia. Mami curtsies to the witch causing two of her signature muskets to fall from her skirt. Gerturde throws her sofa at her and the flies through the air to dodge return fair from Mami’s guns. While Mami is focused on the witch herself several small familiars on the ground merge into a giant tendril that takes her off guard and slams her into the wall. 

Mami is able to turn the table by conjuring threads from the bullets embedded in the ground to ensnare the witch. She then uses the ribbon of her uniform to cut herself free and then conjures a giant gun with it that blows the witch away.

(No one else in this show names their attacks, Mami is such a dork)

Mami celebrates with a cup of tea as the barrier dissipates, then picks up a strange black object from the ground. This she tells Madoka, Sayaka, and the audience is a Grief Seed. The Grief Seed is a witches egg and it can be used to cleanse the darkness of a girls soul gem, replenishing her magic. She then tosses it into the darkness only for a previously unseen Homura to catch it. It has one more use which Mami offers to Homura. Homura rebuffs this offer which Mami takes poorly and Sayaka even more poorly. Madoka on the other hand just wants everyone to get along. 

With the influence of the witch gone the woman from earlier awakens, and is distraught at what she almost did. Mami comforts the woman telling her it was all a bad dream. The episode ends with Madoka musing that while she has no idea what wish she would stake her life on she admires Mami’s heroism. (cue Mata Ashita)

That’s Episode 2 which I would say is the most fundamental episode for understanding Madoka’s plot. We got a whole lot of exposition dumped, far more than you notice because it’s intercut with slice of life movements and character building. The it was capped off with a cool fight scene.  Everything from here on essentially either confirms or subverts what episode establishes.  

#semi-original content #puella magi madoka magica #madoka magica anniversary analysis

[hellyeahomeland]

“Two Minutes”: an  HYH recap

The episode opens as Carrie takes a we-should-really-retire-this-phrase-but “whore’s bath” in what has to be the most poorly lit bathroom in the history of the universe. For some unknown reason she’s watching the news, which is definitely a thing one should do in a crisis to relieve stress. Side note but throughout the show’s entire run they’ve had a fake cable news station called CNB and I appreciate that it’s stuck it out in this imaginary universe for as long as we have.

Somewhere in the Korengal, Max is very sweaty and very tired and—surprise!—still carrying around that flight recorder in his backpack like a hero. The Taliban soldier stops their mountainside trek for a bit to pee. Max sees a plane (or drone?) flying overhead and begins shouting and runs off. A scuffle ensues, Max kicks him flat on his back. We are surprised Max has it in him but, again, hero. All this comes to a gasp-inducing end when the Taliban shoulder shoots Max from behind in the shoulder, the place where everyone on this show ends up getting shot (literally, left shoulder, what is it with this??). He falls to the ground with a thud.

Back at the White House, HIOHHP steps into the Oval Office to give a short address. Linus touches every inch of his face while he looks on.

HIOHHP: Good evening, America. In the words of Shaggy, it wasn’t me.

It’s over after about 20 seconds and HIOHHP and Linus get the fuck outta there and head into the situation room and everyone gets up when he enters and blah blah blah. They’re having technical difficulties connecting to Kabul station, which I take it is something that happens quite frequently at the CIA.

In Kabul station, Carrie asks Saul—for what is probably the eleventy hundredth time—where is Max and is he alive and who is looking for him?? Carrie has no concept of making herself less annoying while everyone is still wondering why the heck she’s stuck around in Kabul this long but THAT IS WHY WE LOVE CARRIE.

Carrie goes and finds another person to annoy, this time poor Lonnie in the computer room. Lonnie is, what’s the phrase, Totally Over It. She badgers him with questions about the phone calls they’re listening to, wanting to know if there’s been anything about Max. She asks for the keywords in the audio that trigger some sort of automated something or other. The words on this list are the names of various mass transit systems in America (??), countries in the Middle East, and ominous noun/verbs like “bomb,” “murder,” and “attack.” Carrie quite astutely points out that they’re NOT THAT DUMB. Lonnie is basically like, “if you want to add more words, be my guest. Also who are you again??”

Keyword list in hand, Carrie heads back onto the main floor just in time to eavesdrop on the arrival of Vanessa Kroll, who is leading the FBI investigation of Just What the Fuck Happened Out Here, Guys?! We can tell right away that she Means Business because she asks for a room with doors that close. Shouldn’t this be every room in Kabul station? Anyway, Carrie overhears the whole thing and has a bit of an “oh shit” look on her face, probably because she’s been meeting with Yevgeny in secret for God knows how long and oh! the CIA are thisclose (actually they’re finished, but she doesn’t know that) to learning what was actually said at her meeting with Yevgeny a few days ago.

Despite all of this, Carrie could really use some fresh air, so she hops on her motorcycle. I know it’s a stunt double and not actually Claire Danes riding this thing but IT IS SO BADASS THAT CARRIE JUST KNOWS HOW TO RIDE A MOTORCYCLE. And she really does. She weaves in and out of traffic with ease. And she also has to reroute herself several times, which is how we know she’s been to the place she’s going at least a few times before. And where is that? YEVGENY’S PLACE, which would be a cool name for a mid-90s sitcom. Anyhoozles, he opens the door like, “oh, you again?” and she barges right in because—I repeat—they’ve done this before.

Carrie: First things first, this is definitely the beginning of an arrangement, despite what I’m saying now. Yevgeny: I’m so tall that I’m literally leaning my elbow on this china cabinet. Carrie: Remember that time you took away my meds and I went totally crazy and then tried to kill myself? Yevgeny: Yeah, I saved you. Carrie: Ok, well saving me wasn’t the actual favor. What I’m asking for now is. Yevgeny: I’m listening. Carrie: My friend, Max, my ONLY friend, is missing. I think the Taliban have him. I have to save him. Yevgeny: Damn, I’m surprised you have a friend. Carrie: I know you have contacts in the Korengal. Can you figure out where he is? Yevgeny: On one condition! Carrie: Which is? Yevgeny: You need to break into the computer room at the CIA and cut off the surveillance over the region, otherwise my contact is gonna get bombed to oblivion right after I call him. Carrie: First, I’m amused you think I even know how to do something in a computer room. Second, no way! Yevgeny: Ok, then I can’t help you. Carrie: But—! Yevgeny: Look, you came to me. I’m not making you do anything. It’s a phone call, two minutes. All I’m asking for is two minutes. Carrie: Hey, I said that line once… I can’t fucking believe this is happening to me and I further can’t believe how attracted I am to you right now. I need to take a few steps backward otherwise I don’t know what might happen. Yevgeny: I’m just gonna lean over here since I know you like when guys lean. Carrie: FINE. I’LL DO IT. Be ready at 3pm. I hope our watches are synchronized.

Over at the presidential palace, G’ulom is asking Saul and resident hottie Scott Ryan where Haqqani is. He’s convinced the Americans have him. They go back and forth about the 300 Taliban soldiers G’ulom has locked up in a soccer stadium without food or water. He’s gonna murder them all soon, they’re pretty sure. Anyway they all hate each other and Saul doesn’t even have the will to pretend anymore. He straight up accuses G’ulom of crashing both the helicopters so he could become President. Phew! G’ulom says they can both gtfo and they do.

Carrie returns to Kabul station for her interview with Vanessa Kroll, which lasts about 30 seconds and she stops just short of being like, “wait you’re not gonna arrest me now?” Give it time, Carrie. Give it time.

…Because Mike is finally listening to the recording of Carrie’s conversation at the mosque with Yevgeny. And it’s even worse now, mostly out of context, and given that Carrie fully lied on her contact report. Mike says things like “fucking Christ.” Jenna, God bless her, thinks maybe Yevgeny is lying and also totally understands why Carrie would lie about all this. Mike wants to report this up the chain but decides to sit with it a while.

Somewhere in Afghanistan, Max is—thank God!!!!—still alive, asleep on a mattress in some random dude’s house. The Taliban soldier picks up his backpack and takes it into town to sell off some of those Hot American Goodz. But not the flight recorder! No one knows what that weird red box even is for. It’s promptly moved to the back of the shop and put on the junk shelf.

In Kabul, Haqqani remains hidden, also in some random dude’s house. Random dude informs him that G’ulom has a million dollar bounty on his head and if he doesn’t turn himself in he’s gonna murder everyone in the soccer stadium, so Scott Ryan was correct. What a quandary!

HIOHHP is in the Oval Office and Linus has rolled up his sleeves so you know shit is getting real. Saul and Scott inform them that G’ulom is gonna murder all these people without due process, which is totally against their constitution. If that happens, they’ll see a wave of insurgency that will once again completely destabilize the country. Which means more troops. Remember two days ago when we were so close to peace? HIOHHP needs to get on the phone with G’ulom ASAP to make sure this doesn’t happen and he can start by threatening to withhold all aid from them.

He agrees to get on the phone and then has a highly hilarious exchange with Linus where they say the word “G’ulom” over and over and fuck, this show is funny again!

The phone call, however, is a bust. HIOHHP plays right into G’ulom’s hand. He says things like “no” when he really means “yes” and just repeats Saul’s talking points, only less coherently, and by the end G’ulom gets him to agree that they gotta murder all these Taliban soldiers immediately since it will be a defining ~presidential moment~. Linus nearly falls out of his chair. Bet Elizabeth Keane is looking pretty great now, huh? I hope she’s enjoying an extended Caribbean vacation.

It is 14:52 which means Carrie has eight minutes until she needs to do something with computers. Jenna attempts to follow her, but Carrie catches on. Jenna is actually inches away from Carrie’s door when she opens it, asks smartly if she needs anything, before Jenna makes up a lie so bad Carrie could have come up with it. I am starting to feel badly for Jenna because she cannot do literally anything she’s supposed to.

Carrie makes her way to the computer room and once again we are treated to some high comedy. She gets Lonnie to print something for her and purposely causes a paper jam in the computer. Lonnie remains Totally Over It but Carrie causes just enough of a diversion to cut off the surveillance to the Korengal region. I know what you’re thinking: this is so unbelievable! The wires would never be out in the open, unlocked, where just anyone could disconnect them. Unfortunately, I totally believe this is how the CIA operates. And also, Carrie could never do something with a computer! On that point, you are right. Anyway, two minutes pass and she reconnects the wire and gets her stack of paper so it was a pretty good day for Carrie!

Oh wait…. Mike decides to bring his concerns to Saul. Carrie and Yevgeny have met, he recorded their conversation, she fully lied about what they said, and it’s all Very Concerning and he thinks that Carrie may have unwittingly helped Yevgeny assassinate Beau! Saul very evenly says “I am going to have to listen to that tape.”

Haqqani decides that he will turn himself in, only to the Americans, not to G’ulom. Because then he’ll get a trial, and everything always turns out cool when you trust the Americans. He must not know Saul’s not running this dealio anymore. Everyone looks at him like he’s crazy and I must stress that this show making me feel badly for Haissam Haqqani is messing with me.

Later, Saul, having just listened to The Tape, knocks on Carrie’s door.

Saul: Let me cut to the chase. What the fuck’s going on with you and Yevgeny? Carrie: Did Mike brainwash you? Saul: Just answer me. Carrie: Lies, lies, lies, more lies. Saul: I know you just said lies. I heard the tape. Carrie: Fuck, the tape. You heard all of it? Saul: Yes. Look, this is all my fault. Carrie: Yeah, I know. Wait, how…? Saul: It was my idea to bring you here and now look what’s happened. Carrie: Jesus, can we stop talking like I’m a child? Saul: No we cannot! Look, here are the facts. You had a relationship with Yevgeny complicated enough to lie about. We’ve literally been here before. Secondly, he saved your life. Even you would feel indebted to him an eensy bit. Carrie: Ok when you put it that way, it sounds really bad. Saul: You told him about Franny. That you thought you were a danger to her. Is that true? Carrie: Goddammit, Saul, you know that’s my trigger… Saul: You never told me these things! How can we be in a codependent relationship if you keep from me things that you know I would absolutely judge you for? Carrie: I’m still putting the pieces together. I’m not trying to be evasive, I literally don’t remember everything. Saul: Yeah, that’s why you have to leave, pronto. Back to Germany. Say hi to Otto for me. Carrie: Absolutely not, I can’t leave Max behind. I sent him here. I mean, actually you did, but I have a thing where I feel guilty about things that aren’t really my fault. Saul: CARRIE, PLEASE JESUS. You look guilty AS FUCK. You talked Warner into coming here. You knew for an hour after meeting him where he was going. That’s enough time to make a phone call! Carrie: This is bullshit. Saul: Of course it’s bullshit, but the FBI needs a scapegoat and baby, you’re it! Carrie: Idgaf. Doing everything we can to find Max means keeping me here because Yevgeny has a lead, I just talked to him. Let me call him back! Saul: I want… to take a nap.

It’s… a devastating, climactic scene. In the way Saul pleads with Carrie, and she pleads back with him. So layered in all they’ve gone through the last seven seasons and beyond…

He thinks Yevgeny is trying to recruit her, just telling her what she wants to hear. She says that’s not what’s happening. They’re at an impasse and Saul finally just tells her she’s getting on that fucking plane to Germany willingly or in handcuffs. (There’s a third option he doesn’t yet know about.)

Thirty minutes later, Carrie does have her shit and is ready to leave. She smiles at Saul, which is how he should have known something was up. She gets in the car and, would ya look at that! Haqqani is surrendering himself in front of the embassy at this exact moment! Guess we’ll see where that ends up.

Elsewhere, Max has finally woken up. No he’s not ok. He was just shot! But his backpack is gone and he needs it back. The flight recorder! Cut to a long procession of donkeys carrying cargo through a mountainous valley. They have all sorts of stuff strapped to their backs including one red flight recorder! And the Emmy for Best Comedy Series goes to… Homeland!! Much applause!!

At the airport, Carrie wishes Jenna good luck, which is Carrie code for “fuck you and lose my number.” She scans her boarding pass and goes onto the jetway with the other passengers. Jenna continues her string of having one fucking job and failing at it because she departs soon after.

Right on cue, Carrie activates the aforementioned third option and makes a sharp right turn off that jetway, down a staircase, out onto the road below. and into the car of Yevgeny, ever punctual. He gives her a look like “damn I missed you,” before they both speed off.

#homeland #an hyh recap #two minutes #homeland spoilers #* #by: sara #so many snaps for this episode

[sheewolf85]

#85 edgepuff

I’m so sorry these are taking so long to get finished! I promise I’m still working on them, just kind of going back and forth among the other things I’m writing.

The line for this one is:  “I’m not going to be sympathetic until you go to a doctor.”

Edgepuff is one of those ships that I adore when I read them, but I’ve never written it before. Apologies if this sucks.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

If there was any one thing Edge appreciated about his boyfriend, it was that Papyrus understood the merit behind good common sense. Sure, he was energetic and fun-loving and tall and handsome and talented in so many ways, ways that made him blush if he thought about them, and this train of thought was getting derailed fast. 

The point was that Papyrus knew when to coddle and when to expect those in his care to buck up and take control. 

Edge had witnessed this common sense in his boyfriend the first time they met, having been perfectly practical about meeting alternate versions of him and his brother. It had been refreshing, mostly because everyone else seemed to be either freaking the fuck out or apathetic to the point of napping while the others figured shit out.

Regardless. That was neither here nor there. Edge had a point, and it was that Papyrus was practical, cool, level-headed, and just about the best monster in the multiverse. 

Until he got sick. 

When sick, Papyrus became the biggest, most dramatic idiot in the multiverse. He refused to let others take care of him, likely due to growing up with a brother whose HP was so low he couldn’t afford to accept care lest Sans get sick too. He pushed through it, most of the time making it worse on himself and anyone who had to deal with him in the process. 

Edge would like to take a moment to congratulate himself on being slightly less dramatic. He chalked it up to having a brother who would literally drag his bony ass to the doctor when he was sick. As Red put it, just because he couldn’t care for his younger brother didn’t mean he was going to be an ass about getting care.

Off course, again. 

Today, Papyrus was laying on the couch openly crying about how much he loved Mettaton’s acting and how perfect he’d been before his change into MTT-Neo, only now he was even more perfect because look at those LEGS!

Edge sighed and carefully carried the tray of soup and medicine out to the coffee table. He took a second to press the inside of his wrist to Papyrus’ forehead. 

“He’s just so pretty!” Papyrus wailed, grabbing Edge’s wrist and looking at him with wide, wet sockets. He went on about Mettaton’s fashion style and that he was going to be releasing a new line of swimwear this summer and Papyrus was already so in love even though he hadn’t seen a damn piece of fabric yet. 

Edge only nodded. He certainly had his MTT phase when he was younger, often blasting the singer/songwriter’s heavy metal music through the house and annoying the shit out of his brother in the process. He’s grown out of it, though. Mostly. Just because he occasionally indulged in a movie or a TV show marathon every now and then didn’t mean anything.

“Did I upset you?” Papyrus asked, his tone unusually calm. His temperature was too high, had been for too long, and Edge was going to have to try to talk him into seeing a doctor again. 

“No, of course not,” Edge soothed. “Now sit up and try to eat some soup.”

“You look angry.”

“That’s just my face. You know that.”

Papyrus hummed. “No, I know, but it’s more than that. You think I love Mettaton more than I love you, don’t you?!” he suddenly cried. He took a second to stare at Edge helplessly before flopping back down, face first, into the couch cushion. 

Edge sighed. “I think you love me and Mettaton in very different ways,” he explained. “Come on, now. You need to eat.”

“But I love you so much!”

This whole thing would be cute if Edge didn’t already know Papyrus felt like shit. His bones were likely aching with every breath and the sound of a nasally voice coming from a person with no nose was unique in and of itself. 

“And I love you, which is why I insist you sit up and eat.”

After a few more tears, he finally did. Edge didn’t bother helping; he knew Papyrus could do it himself and he’d used up every single ounce of Edge’s ability to coddle over the last few days. If he would just go and see the damn doctor, then Edge could feel a bit more like feeding into what Papyrus was trying to get from him, but he just couldn’t keep this up. He had limits, dammit.

By the time he’d finished eating what he could--half the bowl of soup--his demeanor had calmed quite a bit. He sniffled and looked miserably over at Edge. 

“I made you mad, didn’t I?” he asked.

“How? By suggesting that Mettaton is prettier than me? Hardly.” 

“Then why…” 

He knew what Papyrus was trying to ask, but there wasn’t a very couth way to ask why someone wasn’t pampering you anymore. 

Edge didn’t bother sugar coating it. “I’m not going to be sympathetic until you go to a doctor.”

“But I don’t need--”

Edge shut him up with a look. “You’ve been ill for five days. How long does this kind of thing normally last for you?”

Casting his glance down at the blanket on his legs, Papyrus answered quietly. “Two to three days.”

“You’re also not showing much sign of improvement. I love you, Papyrus, but if you want me to believe that you’re not just dragging this out to get more of my attention, then you’ve got to do something about it. Show me you’re not taking advantage of my time and efforts.”

It was neither of their faults that work had been more stressful and taking up more of his time recently. He could understand Papyrus wanting to spend more time with him as they did when their relationship was young, but he absolutely could not excuse what he felt was a deliberate attempt at tricking him into missing work. 

“I’m not--! I would never--!”

Edge nodded. “And I want to believe that. I truly do. So help me out by setting an appointment, okay?”

Papyrus leaned into his shoulder and nodded. “Okay,” he said softly. “I’ll call them right now.”

Edge sighed in relief and wrapped an arm around his boyfriend’s shoulders. He listened as the call was made and an appointment set. Once it was done, he urged Papyrus to curl up into his lap as they watched a few episodes of Mettaton’s pirate epic together.

#my writing #drabble request #drabble challenge #crysta-cub #edgepuff #undertale papyrus #underfell papyrus

[bigherosixfeels]

City of Monsters Part I REVIEW

Have you ever screamed into a pillow so much that the muscles in your neck got sore? Because I have.

Liv is back and being her usual, manipulative self towards Karmi. Turns out, the real Liv has been infected with "parasythns" and has Karmi trying to figure out a way to stop them from destroying their host. Karmi figures out that the only way to do so is to drive the parasites away from each other, but her idea involves robotics which is not something she's a genius in.

Meanwhile, the nerd gang is starting to get very protective of Hiro. Due to being captured multiple times, they worry that if he's correct about Liv, he'll get kidnapped again. Hiro insists he doesn't need to be protected, but to help ease his friends' worries, he gives them all some amazing upgrades to their ultra armor gear! Wasabi gets a plasma shield and dagger, Gogo gets a hover disc, Honey Lemon gets chem-boots and Fred gets headlights and hearing equipment! Of course, Hiro makes upgrades for Baymax and himself too, but we don't get to see them in action until much later. Baymax now has a new rocket booster and an upgraded version of Overdrive Mode and Hiro uses his mini-magnets to create electric bungee cords!

We get some incredible development between Hiro and Karmi. Karmi is clearly struggling to work on the robotics part of her idea and after learning that Tadashi needed help with the medical input for Baymax, Hiro decides to help her. They're able to work together very well, figuring out a great way to cure the parasythns. Creating nano-microbots and having them in a solution they can survive in, they succeed! They truly do make a great team.

Of course, Liv was less than amused when Karmi was going into a territory that she was unfamiliar with. So, Liv sets out to find a real robotics expert and decides that Wendy Wower would be much more helpful. Mr. Sparkles and the mayoi try to abduct her, taking her to Torii Gate Bridge. They also have to fight against Momakase and a once again mutated Orso Knox. It's an intense battle, but with all their new upgrades, they manage to win the fight and save Wendy!

Back in Liv's office, Momakase reveals to Liv that the leader of Big Hero 6 is Hiro. She tells her that if she separates him from the others, they'll be easy to defeat. Karmi stops by Liv's office and reveals that she got help from Hiro on coming up with a solution for the cure. This obviously doesn't sit well with Liv, but now her true colors have finally shown and she reveals that she'd like to give Karmi an upgrade. Later on, she calls Hiro and is currently hiding at school from Liv. Hiro and Baymax come to her rescue, but Liv and Chris have the Bessie bear monster ready to attack. Unfortunately, the monster takes down Baymax, but Hiro rushes into the lab to get Karmi. We then learn that Karmi did not get away from Sycorax safely. Liv had injected her with a bio-chip and Liv activates it, turning her into a monster. Part 1 ends with a mutated Karmi grabbing Hiro and the nanobots and fleeing out the window.

The first part of CoM was nothing short of spectacular. From excellent character development, to awesome upgrades and the most stress-inducing cliffhanger to date, I was quite literally on the edge of my seat the entire time.

Things I Liked:

I admire Karmi’s willingness to succeed. Even if robotics isn’t her strong suit, she was willing to learn anything she could to help find a cure.

The nerd gang spying on Hiro for the sole purpose of wanting to protect him and make sure they’re there in the event he gets kidnapped again. So sweet!

THE TEAM’S NEW UPGRADES THEY’RE AMAZING!!!!!

Hiro grabbing a stapler as a weapon.

Learning that Tadashi didn’t have the knowledge to create Baymax’s healthcare matrix and needed help.

TADASHI!!!!!

Karmi has a stuffed chicken pox virus

Chris playing with a chew toy is oddly adorable??

FINALLY WE HEAR ABOUT THE MICROBOTS AGAIN

Hiro using his microbots and Karmi using her open house project to come up with the solution? Amazing!

It’s great to see Wendy again!

“I’m not a plant man, I’m a fun guy. No really, I’m technically a fungi.” This is Mr. Sparkles best line in the entire series so far. Hands down.

I LOVE SEEING HIRO AND KARMI WORKING TOGETHER!!!!

Karmi telling Hiro that she admired Tadashi AAAAAAAAA

Momakase and Knox are back!

I love all the upgrades, but the reveal for Hiro’s was so unexpected and I loved it!

Idk why, but I like that Liv turns the lights off in her office whenever she talks to the villains. That’s so extra.

The second Liv called Karmi’s promotion “an upgrade” WAS THE SECOND I LOST IT

Baymax telling Hiro to “Help Karmi” MY HEART

HIRO BEING REASSURING TO KARMI 

THE MUTANT KARMI THEORY WAS RIGHT

Not what I expected her mutation to look like and it’s terrifying, but it’s cool! I feel awful for her though.

THAT ENDING SHOT AT THE “TO BE CONTINUED” SCREEN OMG

Things I Disliked:

I’m just a little confused by one thing. In Prey Date, Knox is cured, but Liv tells him that she can change him back whenever she wants. Obviously that’s what she did in this episode, but Knox wasn’t trying to hurt anyone before so why now? Has he lost his humanity?

On a scale of 1 to 10...I’d rate City of Monsters Part I a 9.5!

#my reviews #i screamed and lost my mind but it's amazing! #looking forward to part 2! #hiro #baymax #wasabi #gogo #honey lemon #fred #karmi #liv amara #chris #tadashi #aunt cass #mr. sparkles #momakase #orso knox #mayoi #wendy wower #big hero 6: the series #bh6: the series #bh6 series spoilers #big hero 6 #bh6 #city of monsters

[ofgrveyards]

Hey angels, I’m Faye, and I’m extremely excited to be apart of this group with you all! I’m 22, I use she/her pronouns, and I’m in the EST timezone. This intro is....a whole ass mess and it’s too long, but I’m throwing it @ you anyways! My discord’s fuck ya chicken strips !#2658 if anyone would prefer to plot there! 

─ *✧ [ DANIELLE CAMPBELL. CIS FEMALE. SHE/HER. ] little hollow welcomes you, JOSEPHINE HAMILTON. an/a TWENTY-FOUR ( 500 ) year old known for being a PARAMEDIC, have you settled in yet ? i’m sure as a VAMPIRE you’ll have no problem fitting in but your COMPASSIONATE + RECKLESS personality might have something different to say. residents have described you as candles burning in the dark, daydreaming about a different life, & open windows at night, i wonder what that means ? [ faye. 22. est. she/her. ]

PAST,

Born in 1519 to a seamstress and a blacksmith, Josephine Hamilton’s early life was spent indoors, shielded from the death and decay that played such a prominent role in London’s history.

Her mother, Agatha, was taken by the plague when she was just 10 years old, leaving her with just her father and younger brother.

The next fourteen years of her life were spent fighting tooth and nail to build a better life for herself and her aforementioned brother. Their father, Joseph, spent more time drinking than providing for his two children, and as a result, became quite belligerent and abusive. 

This was, in part, because of his children’s magical abilities passed down from their mother’s side, to which he refused to attempt to understand and instead forced them to suppress.

Just before Jo’s twenty-fourth birthday, the stress of containing her powers combined with her fear of her father becomes too much and she blows, quite literally. The windows in their flat explode and the entire block is lit aflame shortly thereafter, leaving nothing but ashes in her wake.

After deciding to leave their father to fend for himself in the burning building, she grabs her brother, any belongings they can easily carry, and sets off into the night.

With no surviving relatives in the immediate area and little to no money to their name, they begin their commute to France to visit their mother’s great aunt.

While waiting to catch a boat in Folkstone, Josephine has another episode, resulting in flooding in the town surrounding the docks. This is where she meets the vampire who turns her, who takes pity on the woman’s declining mental stability and lack of bodily control.

That very same vampire, who takes herself and her brother into their home, helps her acclimate to life as a vampire for a few years. This time is spent learning how to feed, control her urges, present as a human in public, and how to compel. 

The final of the four is not something she often used, as she found it to be manipulative to the point of losing what was left of her humanity. She also refused to force feed, and other than her first year, has only ever fed on consenting parties or through other means.

Her brother is turned by them a few years after her, as she refused to be the one to do it to her own flesh and blood. Once he was acclimated to life as a vampire, they set off on their own and travel around London aimlessly.

In her spare time, Jo studied everything she could get her hands on to become a doctor. But as it was a profession society deemed unfit for women at the time, she had to wait.

She went from hospital to hospital working as an aid to patients, biding her time. Eventually, in 1862, when learning about a school in Boston for Women to be professionally trained in the medical field as a physician, she drops everything to head to the states. 

The siblings live there from 1863-1874, during which she also attends a school for nursing. Not long after, they return to England, where she works as a nurse until 1892 when women are officially allowed to practice medicine. 

With the help of her brother and another doctor at the hospital she’d been living at, she opens up her own clinic in a more rural part of England. This is where she stays until the mid 1900′s, when she and her brother part ways. 

Josephine then moves to the states in attempt to continue her practice without raising any red flags. She starts out in Boston where she received her training, then moves on from there, going state to state every few years.

PRESENT,

It was six years ago to date when Jo moved to Little Hollow, originally intending to open her own practice like she has in so many other cities, but she decides to postpone it when she realizes just how significant the supernatural population is in the town.

Due to the considerable fortune earned through the many facilities she’s built over the years that are still in her name, she buys herself a nice house in town with a white-picket fence and a dog. The life she lives behind closed doors may be unspeakable to most, but she does her best to be relatively normal in spite of it.

Continuing working even though she doesn’t need to is a decision that’s made due to her innate desire to continue helping people to the best of her ability. `

Becoming a Paramedic felt like the best option for her, considering she never spends very long with any of the patients, so not only are they unable to get fully acquainted with her, there’s always a change of pace.

Being so settled has become a foreign feeling, though she’s grown to thoroughly enjoy having a home, feeling like she belongs.

She’s fairly active in things around town, known to donate to charities and help the homeless. She also dips into the hospital blood supply on occasion for vampires looking to stray from feeding directly from the source.

When it comes to inter-species politics, she tries to stay out of trouble with the other supernatural people in Little Hallow, instead opting to attempt to keep the peace.

Of course, this doesn’t always go over well, considering she’s got such a big heart and wants to keep everyone happy.

PERSONALITY,

Kind, gentle, soft, dedicated, passionate, thoughtful, stubborn. She’s also enthusiastic, eager to please, and wildly ambitious; both at school/work and in her personal life.

She’s a certified Mom Friend™ and proud of it.

Would literally go to any length necessary if it means keeping those she cares about safe.

Josephine’s got to be one of the most attentive people when it comes to her friendships and loved ones. She is always taking time to spend time with them no matter how busy she may be, will stop whatever she’s doing if they are in need, and gives the best gifts. Her philosophy is that if she’s got to spend her money somewhere, it may as well be on others.

She tends to see the best in people, even those who don’t deserve a moment of her time.

Honestly??? She’s the softest vampire ever, probably much too soft to have survived as long as she has.

Is very, very protective of the less fortunate, be that financially, physically, or in minorities. She doesn’t believe in violence as the answer, but hates any prejudices people may have even more. If she sees anyone being mistreated, she definitely steps in ready for a fight.

MISC,

MBTI:

ALIGNMENT:

CHARACTER TROPES: The Idealist, Nice Girl, Running Gag, Workaholic, there are more but I’ll never get off the trope site if I keep going.

CHARACTER INFLUENCES: Leslie Knope, Kimmy Schmidt, Peggy Carter, April Kepner, Phoebe Buffay.

WANTED CONNECTIONS,

Friends, friends, all the friends.

Frienemies/ex-friends ( this is so hard for her bc she tries to see the best in people, but if they’re a hateful person, she’s not against writing them off ).

A best friend would be super cool, lord knows my girl needs someone to confide in and to turn to when things get rough.

The vampire who turns her and her brother is definitely a wc!

An old friend she’s known for centuries, someone who has seen her grow through the ages.

A neighbor, or maybe a roommate she’s asked to live with her, because the house she bought is so big and she gets lonely lmao

ex fwb maybe???

Enemy turned friend!

Yeah, idk, these are all super random and probably lowkey shitty, but I’m down for anything !!!

#blood.intro #this is so bad YIKES!! #abuse tw #parent death tw #I think that covers it but if I missed any pls don’t hesitate to lmk

[thiswasinevitableid]

Matchmaker or stripper sternclay?

I chose the following: “I strip because I enjoy it and it’s good money, but I didn’t expect to be hired for your friend’s bachelor party. hello, professor“

Given the prompt and where it went, This is Not Suitable For you Workplace. It’s a lemon, in the language of the olden times.

Note: I have an additional part of this planned, if people end up being interested in it.

Most days, Lucky Stern likes this job.

Stripping isn’t what he’d imagined he’d do during college. But it keeps his head above water and the loans from overwhelming him. He likes most of his colleagues, and the place he works is in the gay neighborhood, which is relatively safe when he gets off at weird hours of the night. Plus it means he gets more exercise than he probably otherwise would as a student working two jobs.

So yeah, most days are fine.

Then there are days like the one he’s having now.

He’s one of two dancers hired for a bachelor party, a small one at a nice house in the fancy, woodsy part of town. He and his partner are doing one of their favorite routines (Scully and Mulder, with his partner doing the drag for Scully), so he’s feeling confident.

Until he turns around and sees a familiar face.

His professor.

Technically his former professor. Also, technically, the professor he’s had a raging crush on for two years.

Barclay, as he asked his students to call him, was an athro professor, but Stern had him for a folklore class (“Cryptids in American Folklore and Culture”) as he finished his depth requirements during his sophmore year.  It was his favorite class of the year, and that was only partially due to his professor looking like a lumberjack centerfold (he’s on the younger end of professors, that much Stern knows). Barclay made the material engaging and challenging and shared Sterns fascination with cryptids and their role in the world. And so Stern went to office hours, sometimes because he needed a clarification and (most times) to talk with Barclay about his theories or research  or the latest episode of the ridiculous Bigfoot hunting show they both watched.  They kept meeting even when Stern moved into the next semester and the semester after that. His life got busier, but he still made time once a week to drop in on his favorite professor (and time after to go somewhere private to jack off to the idea of having sex in his office).

Hell, he was in Barclays office five days ago, telling him he’d scored a paid internship after graduation that might, one day, get him a job investigating paranormal phenomena.

And now here he is, looking as surprised as Stern feels.

He can’t bolt, he can’t, they’d probably demand a refund and he’d screw himself and his partner out of a nights pay. So he goes through the routine on autopilot, though every time he hazards a glance at Barclay the other man is looking down. Except for when they finish, both down to what could be called a thong, if you were being generous. Then he’s staring, and Stern’s never felt more exposed.

They disappear back into the kitchen (their staging area) even as some of the attendees cheer for more. He tells his partner to go for it, then throws on an undershirt and pants so he can go into the garden and have a panic attack.

He’s doubled over, stress dry-heaving into some shrubs. It’s not that he’s ashamed, but he’s heard so many horror stories about people who stripped having a client who recognized them blab and cost them their job or their social circle or, or..

A water glass enters his vision.

“Thanks.” He rasps.

“No problem.”

He stands bolt upright, turns,  finds Barclay standing in front of him looking worried. For a moment an awkward pause fills the night air.

“Found a way to pay for school, huh?”

“Yes. What do I have to do to convince you not to tell anyone?” He sighs, tries to keep his shoulders from shaking with pent up panic.

“Convince me to-oh, Lucky, hey, you don’t have to anything.” A hand rests on his shoulder, the gesture familiar and comforting.

“Hold on, are there other people who know and are making you do stuff?” His tone is deathly serious.

“No, it’s just, I got a bit jumpy and went into damage control mode. I apologize.” He takes another sip of water, still can’t look Barclay in the eye (he may be the only man Stern actually has to look up to talk to).

“Listen, I know folks who did the same thing and god knows you’re not the only student at the school who’s landed on this as the best way to avoid money troubles. So no judgement or anything from me, okay.”

Stern nods.

“How’s your stomach?”

“Still feels like shit, but less so.”

“C’mon, lemme make you some tea, it might help.”

“I wouldn’t want to keep you.”

“Need a break from the festivities myself, you’ll be doing me a favor.” He smiles and Stern tries not to melt at the sweetness in it.

They head back into the kitchen and Barclay moves through it effortlessly as he grabs a kettle, a mug, and some tea.

“So…how do you know the groom? Or is it grooms?”

“Grooms. I know Ned better than his fiance, met him through friend of mine named Duck. I’m willing to bet Ned’s the one who hired you guys. He can never pass up a chance to be over the top. Plus I imagine both him and Boyd are enjoying themselves.

“Boyd?”

“Groom number two, guy with all the tattoos and muscles.”

There’s a whoop from the other room just as the kettle boils.

Barclay sets the mug in front of Stern before continuing to putter about the kitchen.

“You hungry at all.”

“Not really, what with panic and the puking.”

“Good point. Lemme know if you start feeling different.”

Stern blows on his tea to cool it, catches Barclay looking at him.

He’s blushing.

“Was the Agent Mulder bit something you picked, or just a happy accident.”

“I picked it as one of my go-tos. Everything said to choose things that made me feel confident and sexy and well, you know me.”

“Yeah, future special agent Stern. Can see why you picked it, it looks good on you.” He sticks a serving knife into a pan of brownies. Stern wishes he had an appetite, there’s some really good food in here.

Wait, does he smell buffalo wings?

Indeed he does. There they are, sitting on a tray, probably left over from dinner.

He loves buffalo wings.

“Help yourself.” Barclay grins as he slides the tray across the island to him, passes a napkin along behind it.

Sterns resolve lasts two seconds and then takes a bite.

“These are amazing.” He whispers and Barclay chuckles.

“Thanks, came up with the mix for the sauce myself. Took a few passes to get the texture right.”

“You made these?”

“Made basically all the food for tonight. It’s a hobby, and like cooking for my friends.”

“That’s very attractive.” He murmurs, taking another bite of the wing. Barclay arches an eyebrow but doesn’t say anything.

The kitchen door swings open and one of the guests comes in, a bigger guy wearing dark green.

“Hidin in the kitchen already?” He drawls at Barclay, before catching sight of Stern, “Oh, howdy, your friend out there said you were feelin sick all of a sudden. You doin okay? Barclay behavin himself?”

“Yes, thank you. I’m sorry for leaving you all with less than you paid for.”

“To be honest, think your friend’s got it covered. Only a few of the fellas are into the whole, uh, whole, y’know.” He gestures at Sterns outfit.

“You’re not dying to have someone cute and mostly naked in your lap, Duck?” Barclays tone is teasing.

“If I wanted that, Indrid is right there.”

“How’s he enjoying the dancers?”

“He’s had too many of those hard sodas, so he’s the kind of drunk where all he wants to do is stare at the lamp with the color changin bulb. Relatedly,” he grabs a water glass and fills it, “I ain’t drinkin anymore tonight so I can get us home safe.”

“Here, take Indrid one of these.” Barclay slips a brownie onto a small plate.

“Thanks, man. See you in a bit.” Then he disappears.

“He seems nice.”

“Yeah, Duck’s a good guy. He and Indrid got married about a year ago, think that man’s gonna be in the honeymoon stage for the rest of his life.”

“Is everyone here married or about to be?” Stern had assumed a bachelor party would have more, well, bachelors.

“I’m not.” Barclay shrugs and Stern nearly chokes on his food when the larger man gives him a suggestive look and sits down beside him.

“What about you? Anyone waiting at home to rub your…legs after a hard nights work?”

“That’s oddly specific, and no.”

“Gotta say I’m surprised. You’re the complete package, smart, hard-working, good looking, only a little messy.”

“I’ll have you know I’m very fastidious-oh” Barclay reaches forward, wipes stray sauce from the edge of his mouth. Stern takes a chance, turns his head slightly and brings the tip of the thumb into his mouth and playfully bites it. Barclay inhales sharply, pupils widening, before slowly pulling his hand back.

“Easy, tiger, I’m not making any kind of move until you’re not a student.”

“I don’t have any classes with you, we’re not even in the same department.” Well, that came out as more of a whine that he wanted.

“That’s my policy, babe. I don’t date any students or TAs, period.”

“But graduation’s not for another month.”

“Gives you time to change your mind safely. And if you still want it, then it gives you lots of time to savor the anticipation.” His deep voice is almost a purr as he brings a hand around to rub Sterns neck, pulling them closer as a result.

“You’re a scrupulous man, Barclay, and right now I could kill you for it.”

“Believe me, it’s as hard for me as it is for you. But if we do, well, anything like that, I want to treat you right and on the level from the start.”

He presses a kiss on the top of Sterns head before sitting back.

“Oh HO!”

Stern jumps and Barclay groans

“Hey, Ned.”

“Here I thought you were simply preparing more refreshments and seeing to our under the weather guest.”

“I’m doing exactly that.”

“Barclay, there were specific rules I agreed to when I hired them-”

“So it was you”

“-and one was that there were to be no private sessions OR touching of the performers.”

Barclay is turning shades of pink never before seen by human eyes.

“It’s alright, really, Barclay was just helping me calm down.”

The man, Ned, look’s concerned.

“Did something happen?”

Stern racks his brain for a half-truth to explain the whole thing.

“Ned, this gentleman is a student at the college. He and I know each other, so you can imagine it was a bit of an unwelcome surprise for him to see me here, so I was doing what I could to help him feel better. And so help me, Ned fucking Chicane, if you ever repeat that piece of information about him to anyone, I will never let you near my cooking again.”

“You have my word. My real one.” Ned looks genuinely somber, “now that’s out of the way.” He bursts into a deep belly laugh.

“I’m so sorry, my dear boy, for landing you in such a difficult, but hilarious, situation. I will be sure to inform your employer that we were all extremely satisfied tonight and wish to add a considerable gratuity on top of what your friend out there has collected from my betrothed.”

“Thank you.” And Stern thought he knew academics with bloated vocabularies. This guy takes the cake.

“My pleasure.” He winks at them and heads back out into the living room.

Stern gives Barclay a perplexed look.

“That’s Ned Chicane? The guy who runs the Cryptonomica? How the fuck can he afford this place.”

“I’ve learned it’s best not to ask.” Barclay steps onto the floor, offers his hand, “C’mon, handsome, help me get the desserts ready.”

“Only if you let me lick whip cream off you.”

“Bold, but no. Not for another month.” He hands him serving tool and Stern takes it with a smile.

—————————————–

Stern has been a graduate all of two days.

Last night was spent with his folks, who were delighted and proud and took him out to dinner.

Tonight he’s working the club, and getting more distracted by the minute. Because someone special is picking him up tonight.

He’s changing into his street clothes when Ray, the most classic butch lesbian he’s ever met and the best bouncer in the city, taps him.

“Hey, there was a bigger fella who came in during your last number and watched like a fucking hawk. Saw him i the back parking lot with a car. Don’t recognize him as a regular. You need someone to walk home with you?”

“Was he taller than me and wearing plaid?”

“Yep.”

“It’s alright, I know him. He’s my date.”

Ray gives him a thumbs up as he steps out the back door.

Barclay leans against the side of his car and watches Stern as he approaches.

“Hey there.” He stands up straight, opens his arms and pulls Stern into a hug.

“I didn’t expect you to catch part of the show.”

“Curiosity got the better of me. I wanted to see what it looked like when you weren’t dealing with a massive, unwelcome surprise. Gotta say, you looked pretty damn good.”

“Apparently you were watching me so intently I had to convince the bouncer you weren’t an unwelcome suitor.”

“Nope, nothing but pure intentions.”

“Is that so?” He rolls his hips and Barclay hisses with pleasure.

“I could see you were hard from the other end of the parking lot.”

Barclay grins, and then pulls Stern in for a kiss, mouth hot and hungry against his own. Stern rolls his hips again and Barclay growls, pushes him against the car.

“You got me, my intentions are fifty percent pure and fifty percent ‘if you don’t get in the car I’m gonna lose what’s left of my self control and fuck you over the hood.”

“Jesus.” Stern moans, one hand searching for the handle of the door. Barclay pulls back and grabs it, opening the door and gesturing for Stern to get in.

By the time they get to Barclays place, Stern is close to passing out from excitement.  Barclay is on him as soon as they’re safely inside the apartment, tossing keys and jacket haphazardly towards the kitchen counter even as he pushes Stern up against it. His kisses are only broken when he speaks.

“Goddamn, this is worth every time I had to lock my office door and fuck my own hand after you came to see me.”

Stern moans at the image, kisses his way across Barclays cheek while he tugs at this shirt.

“You’re one-of-a-kind, Lucky. Didn’t think I stood a chance with you.”

“Likewise. God, Barclay OHgod” The larger man grinds against him, hands digging into his ass.

“Where do you want to start? Assuming you still want to ohokay.” Barclay laughs as Stern drops to knees and starts undoing his belt, “hold on, got a condom in my jacket.” There’s a rustling above him and in a few seconds Barclay hands him the foil packet.

“Presumptuous.” Stern teases as he unzipps his fly.

“I wanted to be ready in case we didn’t even make it to the apartment.”

Stern smiles to himself at that as he yanks Barclays pants and boxers down; the man is exceedingly thoughtful and oh. Oh lord, he is big. He cock is thick and long and Stern needs it in his mouth right now.

As he rolls the condom on he notices Barclay looking down at him with just as much affection as lust in his eyes.

Before Stern can take him in his mouth, a hand grips his chin and holds him in a place.

“Something you want?”

“I assumed that was obvious.”

Barclay clucks his tongue.

“You want it, you gotta ask for it.”

“I want to suck your cock.”

“Close, but not quite. Need you to ask nicely.” Barclay uses his other hand to move his cock against Sterns lips teasingly.

“Please let me suck your cock?”

“Much better.” Barclay releases his chin, braces his hand on the counter,  and Stern gratefully opens his mouth, takes the first inch or so in. He shuts his eyes just as warm fingers ghost across his cheek.

Jesus, he can feel his mouth getting sore from the stretch and it’s been a maximum of thirty seconds and something about that idea, of there being so much of Barclay and it’s all his, makes him moan. He pushes his head forward, takes in more of the shaft and rolls his tongue across it. Tries for more, winces when it starts getting close to this throat.

“Easy, tiger.” Barclays fingers card through his hair, “don’t hurt yourself. Need that sweet mouth of yours in good shape if I’m gonna keep fucking it.”

Stern whines, brings one hand to cover the rest of his cock while the other traces zig-zags on Barclays ass.

“I know, you just want to please don’t you?”

The moan that leaves him is instantaneous and he nods. He’d fantasized about partners saying things like that, dominant and sweet all at once, but hadn’t worked up the courage to ask.

He’s kicking himself for not finding a way to practice deep-throating, he’s seen the bulge in Barclays jeans for months (years) and knew it was formidable.

The hand brushing hair from his forehead steers him from those thoughts.

“Don’t gotta worry about how much of my cock fits. I like it fast, with a lot of pressure. Think you can do that for me?”

Stern locks eyes with him as he eagerly nods, tightens his grip and works his hand rapidly, pre-cum and saliva helping him along. Focuses less on depth and more on sucking, pleasure pulsing through him whenever Barclays cockhead makes contact with his cheek.

“Shit, yeah, that’s it. Goddamn, look at you, wanna watch that  face bob up and down on my cock every night.” There’s a sharp thwack as Barclay slaps his other hand down on the counter and groans. Stern keeps his head still, moves his hand as fast as he’s able and sucks hard, tongue swiping at the tip

“I’m close, babe, so fucking close. Lemme hear you, I wanna hear how much you like sucking my cock.”

Stern moans from deep in his chest, lets a series of broken moans punctuate the small jerks of Barclays hips, the only movement he’s made in his mouth.

“That’s it, fuck FUCK, Lucky, baby, so good.” He cums with another groan, one hand dropping down to hold Sterns head in place. There’s a panting growl as he adds, “gonna keep my cock in your mouth for hours one of these nights” and Sterns whole body pings with interest both at the image and at the promise of this being an ongoing arrangement.

Barclay carefully pulls back, and by the time Stern gets to his feet he’s opened a nearby drawer and pulled out a napkin, which Stern gladly accepts.

“That was…damn.” Barclay chuckles, kissing his neck as he finishes wiping his mouth.

“Did I, uh..” Barclay looks at him curiously and he nearly chickens out, “did I do well?”

Something exceedingly hungry flashes behind the taller mans eyes and he strokes a thumb across Sterns lips.

“Yeah, you did. You were real good for me, Lucky.” The chasteness of the kiss that follows these words is in stark contrast to lascivious tone they take as he continues, “you gonna keep being my good boy tonight.”

Before Stern can respond, two things happen: his stomach gives an comically loud gurgle, and his thighs twinge from that nights work.

Barclay chuckles and Stern glares at the lower half of his body.

“How dare you sabotage the mood at a time like this?” He hisses, which only makes Barclay laugh harder as he pulls his underwear and pants back up.

“I’ll make you some dinner. Have a seat.”

Stern drops into a chair and watches Barclay root through the fridge, pulling out a few containers and tossing butter into a pan. His leg is still twinging, so he stands, swings it up and rests his heel on the table to stretch it out.

Barclay drops the wooden spoon he was holding, along with his jaw.

“The dancing helps with flexibility.” Stern shrugs, casually.

“No kidding.”

“The stove is beginning to smoke.”

“Shit! Ah, well, guess you’re having leftover risotto warmed in really brown butter.”

Stern does, and it’s delicious.

As he eats, he slips his shoes off and Barclay motions for him to put his foot in his lap and proceeds to gently rub it as he chats with Stern about the research he’ll be conducting over the summer.

“..So yeah, it’s mostly pouring through interviews and newspapers, but maybe there’s one roadtrip in the mix.” He glances down at Sterns plate, now clean, then smirks at him.

“Care to continue this conversation in the bedroom?”

“Very much so.”

Barclay takes his hand and leads him into a room down the hall. Like the rest of the space, it looks as though someone tried to cram an Appalachian lodge into one bedroom apartment.

“Legs still sore?” He murmurs, arms around Sterns waist and lips grazing the back of his neck.

“Yes, but it’s fine, I don’t want that to get in the way of whatever you had planned.”

There’s a soft laugh against his skin.

“Still trying so hard to be good me, huh?”

Sterns melts back against him with breathy “yes.”

“Then take your clothes off and lay on the bed. Facedown. Underwear can stay on, if that’s more comfortable.”

Stern whips off his t-shirt, tosses his jeans after it and flops onto the bed on his stomach. He can’t really see what Barclay’s doing, feels the bed dip after a few moments. And then something cool hits his thigh. For a second he thinks it’s stray lube and Barclay is getting right to the point, but then fingers begin kneading at his muscles and he sighs into the pillow.

“See, Lucky, here’s the thing; you wanna be good for me, you gotta accept that means I’m gonna be good to you.” Barclays hand presses down towards his calf, stopping to thumb at a knot, “don’t gotta try to give me the right answers or anything like that. Just gotta tell me what you want.”

Slowly but sure he works his way down one leg and then up the other before lightly tapping Sterns ass.

“Roll over.”

When Stern does, his breath catches in his throat; Barclay’s in only his boxers, his body otherwise bare and broad and so appealing Stern thinks this may be a dream.

Barclay runs a hand appreciatively down his chest, drinking him in.

“You act like you’ve never seen me in my underwear before. Which is demonstrably false.”

“Yeah, but I couldn’t do this” the hand moves across Sterns hips, “or this” down to his thigh, “or this” it’s on his cock, gently stroking it up.

“Fair point, ohhhhh.” His back arches as Barclay adds more pressure and he frantically tugs his boxer briefs off, Barclay not missing a beat before taking his cock in his hand. The larger man shifts so he’s laying on his side, hand still working Stern over and lips kissing his cheeks.

“I want you to tell me when you get close. You gonna do that?”

“Yes, Barclay, I promise, I oh, oh fuck.” Barclays grip and pace turn relentless and Stern lets himself be carried away by the feeling until his orgasm starts building.

“Close, I’m, oh fuck you.” Barclays hand stills as he leans in and bites Sterns ear.

“What did I say earlier about being polite?” The growl in his voice makes Stern whimper and wriggle his hips.

“I, I, apologize, please, pleaseplease keep going.”

“Much better.” He starts stroking him again, panting against his ear, and soon Stern feels himself getting close. He could just not tell him. But where’s the fun in that?

“I’m so close again.”

“You wanna come.”

“Yes, please Barclay I want to so badly, I want to come in your hand, wanna come for you, I want, I want-” He’s babbling, he must sound absurd, but Barclay moans, kisses him hard.

“Then be a good boy and come for me.”

Stern bucks his hips, thrusting as best he can in time with Barclays movements and then he’s coming, Barclays name an obscene sound on his lips.

He lays, shaking, as it finishes washing over him, and then Barclay kisses his forehead.

“You did so well. You were so good for me.”

Stern turns his head, makes small, needy noise that Barclay correctly interprets as wanting a kiss. Then he slides of the bed, returning with a towel for the stray cum on Sterns stomach. He’s not quite sure what he’s supposed to do now.

“Do I, should I go?”

“Only if you want to. Be glad if you stayed the night, but don’t want you to if it feels weird.”

“I’d like to, very much.”

Stern means to get up and get ready for bed, or at least ask for pajamas. But Barclay is there and warm and holding him and he’s so happy and so sleepy that he drops off into pleasant dreams, the feeling of Barclays breath slow and even against the back of his neck.

Some disastrous work days, he thinks as he dozes, have very happy endings indeed.

#sternclay #au list prompt #prompt fills #agent stern/barclay #CW: stripping #will this get flagged? #who even knows

[iraclemayrps]

! you know what i'm here forrrrrr

@neicyrps

Who was the one to propose: 

Tariq. Duh. It sort of just…happens. For Ryan, anyways. For months, Tariq secretly stressed over how to do it. Part of him - the over the top person that he is, wanted an ‘all eyes on us’ kind of proposal. ‘Cause that’s what Ryan deserved. But the more he thought about it. The more he knew Ryan and what she’d want. He decided that a more lowkey proposal was the best way to go. So he did. He’d slipped the ring on her finger after she’d crashed hard from a double shift. The question in bold sharpie writing on one of her old bright pink note cards tapped on the bathroom mirror for her to see when she shuffled in. And the living room littered with her favorite flowers trailing from the bedroom, the table set with her now cold favorite meal and him chilling on the couch as if he hadn’t been waiting for hours for her to wake up.  

Who stressed more over wedding planning: 

Both. It’s the cultural clash that Tariq expected would happen after proposing to a good old, Southern Christian black girl. From the food to the music. To who’ll preside over their ceremony. “Should we just have a justice of the peace? I mean, it will be a interfaith marriage.” Tariq sighs and pulls Ryan into a silent hug. He is two seconds away from grabbing his fiancee and heading to the courthouse to marry her. Right the fuck now. Some of his uncles are asking if she’ll convert. Or if he will. His aunties are talking kids. And all Tariq wants - besides marrying the woman in his arms - is to take her somewhere quiet with nice ass weather so he can see her in as less clothing as possible. No wonder a few of his cousins laughed when they found out his fiancee was Christian. In the end, they work it out ‘cause failure was not a fucking option. But damn, if he isn’t looking forward to their honeymoon.

Who decorated the house:

It’s a weird mixture of both of their tastes. The integration of Ryan’s favorite colors with his (green and gold) is an interesting sight for Tariq. An argument - or several - originated from him learning not to use decorative pillows for anything other than aesthetics. “Pillows are used for sleeping, Nae.” “Not those, Tariq! You’ve smushed them. Do you know how much those cost?” And it’s not like Tariq didn’t know. He just assumed that as a grown man, he could sleep on any pillows in his house. …Apparently not all of them. “I’ll cash app you the money. Just.. damn.”

Who is more organized:

Ryan. Hands down. Not that Tariq isn’t organized. But Ryan likes things in their place. All the time. He knew that going into this. Them finally living together. And he thought that knew. Or that, at the very least, she’d tried to warn him. But…he’s… learning to keep his shoes are out of the way so she doesn’t trip in the dark of night as she trudges to bed exhausted. Or remember to put up reminders when he’s used the last of something. It’s not perfect but Tariq is learning.

Who initiates bedroom fun:

Tariq. But in his defense, have you seen his wife? He continues to give praise to Allah on that alone. Especially considering how they met. He’s been threatened with a ‘no-touching’ rule that has to go into effect when Ryan has important things to do. Like major reports to complete and things like that. But so far, Ryan hasn’t used it yet. She will though. One day. Until then, Tariq is more than willing to keep her distracted.

Who suggested kids first:

Verbally, between the two of them, it’s Ryan. Tariq shouldn’t find the anxious look she gives him, or the wringing of her hands and thinning of her lips, to be cute. But he does. His Ammi has been asking for a grandchild since a week after they returned from their honeymoon. Which, trust him. Tariq was trying. The idea of a unique, smaller version of them out and causing havoc in the world was something that Tariq couldn’t shake. “I’ve been waiting on you, Doc.” He laughs ‘cause it’s the truth. “Fuck yeah. Let’s do this.”

Who’s more dominant: 

Tariq. It’s not because he’s a man. But that Ryan has this unspoken thing about telling him what she wants aloud. He figured that out as he got to know Ryan. Not that she doesn’t have her moments. It’s weird but Tariq likes it. Which, dealing with him, appears to come easier and more regularly than before they met. Ryan’s not entirely demure - see how they met. It just has to coaxed out of her. Which is something Tariq doesn’t mind. At all. 

Who’s the cuddler:

Tariq. He’s a tactile communicator. He talks with his hands. He works with them. Like most people, he uses them often. But it’s just something about Ryan that makes him gravitate towards her. Like a ship steering towards a lighthouse near the coast. His hands have to touch some part of her. Most of the time. So cuddles are natural. He likes the feel of her near his side. Or front. And on his emotionally draining days, his back. Her fingers combing through his short hair as he listens to the beat of her heart. 

What’s their favorite non-sexual activity:

Cuddling aside? Ryan may or may not have gotten Tariq hooked on some trash tv show. One that, save to say, he does not watch without her. “Alright, alright. Explain this to me again?” They sat on the couch, Ryan curled against his side, as a earlier season of a Bravo reality tv show classic starts up. “Okay. So that’s Nene. She doesn’t like Kandi this season. That’s Kandi. Oh. And she’s not cool with Kim again - Nene, I mean - but they’ll probably make up in a few episodes. And then there’s Sheree…” Tariq will damned if he’s clowned for even knowing this. Let alone watching it. 

Who kills the spiders: 

Tariq is the go-to killer of all things creepy crawly. There’s this one instance of Ryan being unpleasantly surprised by a spider crawling along the shower wall. While she was in there. Ass naked. “Why’d you leave the window open, Ryan?” Tariq asked, in between chuckles. His sides hurting from laughing so hard. He’d thought a burglar was in there with her, from the scream he’d heard. “I got it. I got it. It’s dead now. Don’t worry.” Tariq almost slipped and fell from the water splatter on the floor left behind when Ryan hauled ass out of the shower to get to safety. “No, we’re not moving! You should’ve turned on the damn fan.”

Who falls asleep first:

They take turns. Mostly due to their erratic schedules. A first year doctor and a late-night hip hop radio personality? Of course sleep is the last thing on their minds. 

Who is louder?

Sexually? Ryan. Non-sexually? It depends. When it comes to the World Cup. Or football - see soccer - in general, Tariq is an obnoxiously loud fan. Anything that lets him proudly wear Pakistan’s colors is a guarantee for him “show out” as Ryan would say. On the flip side, she’s the same way about things she enjoys. So it depends on the season for both. Tariq is definitely louder when it comes to shit talking. He keeps trying to give Ryan pointers but “Who’s gonna stitch you up if I’m shit talking with you?”

Who is more experimental?

Both. Tariq isn’t afraid of try new things. But depending on the subject, Ryan can be more hesitant. “What do you mean, out here? Tariq. Have you lost your mind?” “Noori. It’s our honeymoon.” My light. It’s one of Tariq’s new nickname for Ryan. He’s been using it since they’ve got engaged. It’s becoming a favorite of his. “You’re telling me that you don’t wanna feel me under the stars? C’mon, nobody’s here.” They discover that mirrors are a great compromise. 

Do they fuck or make love?

Both. For someone who doesn’t drink, alcohol definitely plays a part in this. Tariq can tell the night he’ll have, depending on the number of drinks Ryan has. Nowhere is she like Amy from Brooklyn Nine Nine. But he’s learned the higher the number of drinks, the more likely fucking will happen over making love. Drinks aside - emotions are the other factor. If they’re in a stalemate as both of them can, and will be, stubborn as hell  - Tariq knows that the first few rounds of makeup sex can hardly be called that. Maybe a few things end up getting damaged or even broken. But in the end, his marriage is in tact. Which is all that matters.

Who is more likely to be caught masturbating?

Tariq has. Not that he planned on it. But, in his defense, it’d been a minute and he missed his wife. Obviously. Ryan was at work. Or well, he thought. The shower - yes the same one that Ryan had the classic run in with the spider - was supposed to be a safe place. But sleepy doctors do not like walking into their marital home hearing moans greeting them in the night. Especially from their husband. Without her. “So you gonna stand there or…?” Tariq shot Ryan a challenging eyebrow, stepping back in open invitation for her to join. So it was all good.  

Who comes first?

Ryan. It wasn’t for lack of not trying. It’s just that… well, she married a man that makes sure that she comes before him. Literally. Not that she’s complaining.

Who is better at oral and who prefers it?

For a good, old born and raised in the church Southern Christian, Ryan is excellent at oral. Which was a top-notch surprise for Tariq when he finally learned this fact. However, Tariq certainly prefers to give as good as he gets. He has this smug quirk that he does in the days following. Tariq struts around their place shirtless afterwards, proudly displaying his supposed battle scars from his efforts. Despite saying otherwise, he knows Ryan loves it.

Who usually initiates things?

For the most part - Tariq. Ryan initiates calling Tariq out on his shit. Or when she needs her stubborn husband to gain an objective perspective. A busted lip and bruised knuckles on her husband is not what she expects to see when paged down to the ER from her rotation in the lab. “You can’t just fight everybody that says stupid shit.” “What?!” “You can’t. What if something happens to you? What am I supposed to do then? I didn’t marry you to become a fucking widow, Tariq.” With a heavy sigh and an apology on his bloody mouth, Tariq agrees to pick his battles next time. 

Who is more sensitive?

Ryan. Hands down. She has the emotional sensitivity on lock. Physically - “Stop that shit.” Tariq jerked, his body moving from Ryan’s reach instinctively. “Are you…” “Nah, what’re you doing? Get your hands-” The noise that left Tariq neared a pterodactyl screech. “You’re ticklish!” “No the fuck I’m not.” “Stop moving. Let me see.” She could barely get the words out, laughing around them. “Ryan get your fucking hands away from me.” “Oh my god, Mr. Big and Bad, is ticklish. I got your ass now.” “Ryan!”

Who has the most patience?

Both. In different ways. Tariq directs people to the near-saint like patience he says he used while “waiting on my wife to stop being another man’s fiancee.” To which, his voice may sound annoyed but the confident smirk Tariq wears while uttering it says something else. As a doctor, Ryan has patience in spades. It’s something that Tariq jokes about - still he likes that about her. She’s the calm to his ongoing storm. 

#char: tariq hassan #neicyrps #i took this meme literally in some areas lol but whatever you got them feels #rp shit: answered memes #rp things

[leo-lucid]

Bewitching Which Monster Chapter 1: The Home

The road to my new home was bumpy and long. I looked out the window from my cab and watched the trees go by. I smiled a little as I saw the wind start to blow up the colorful leaves that were lying on the dirt road. They swirled around within the air and landed on the back on the ground behind us. Oh yeah, I could totally find myself living here and practicing my magic for a while.

"So, what brings you all the way down here? Young women tend to go off to the big cities, not small towns with nothing but forest for miles." My driver tried to make conversation. I settled back into my seat and looked at her through the mirror.

"I inherited the mansion up this road. My grandparents left it to me in their will and I have been looking for a more secluded place surrounded by nature. It may help me work more productively and it's peaceful up here. I have a greater chance of finding what I'm looking for here too." I explained.

The driver kept glancing back and forth between me and the road. "So, you're their granddaughter, Anise Devane. They talked about you fondly whenever we met in the town festivals. I'm so sorry about your grandparents. What are you looking for exactly?"

I returned my attention back to the trees. "A plot of land to grow herbs and plants. And to grow as a person myself." I answered as honestly as I could. I couldn't tell her that I was a witch and I was going to plant plants for my magical practices. We witches are a lot more free to practice than we were many years ago but it was still a little bit of a taboo topic to talk about with normal humans.

"Well, you'll definitely find peace and quiet up here. Welcome to Hazelview. Small town, small people and a whole lotta nature. You'll fit right in in no time." She chiperily described. "Here we are!"

I looked out the front windshield to see the small mansion my grandparents have left for me. The foliage was covering a majority of the grey shingles and the curtains in the window were drawn back. The steel gate would've looked menacing if it weren't for the flourishing vines wrapping all around the bars. I remembered this old house. So many memories. Even if the mansion was huge for one person alone and secluded in the woods, it still looked warm and welcoming.

The taxi driver pulled into the white gravel driveway and stopped the car. I got out and looked up at my new home. The driver opened the trunk and started to unload my luggage for me. "Here you go, sweetie. Hopefully, your moving truck will arrive before you run out of clothes to wear."

"Thank you so much. How much do I owe you?" I asked as I reached for my wallet in my back pocket.

"Nah, free of charge. You're one of us town folk now. If you ever need a lift, just give me a call. See ya later, neighbor." She declined, finished unloading the trunk and sped away before I could insist or even say thanks.

I grabbed my bags from the ground and began to drag them inside the house.I pushed the gate open with my shoulder and made my way to the large, oak door. I put my bag down on the porch and fished around my pocket for the key.

The door swung open slowly once I unlocked it, creating a loud squeaking noise. I made a mental note to fix that soon.

The house was a bit dusty and there was a lot of furniture that was left behind. The wood would need to be shined again and the walls would probably have to get a new coat of paint. The house was on the older side, dating back a good century or so. It's had a lot of work done since when it was first built. It was always known as the Devane house. Always have and always will be.

I went up one of the staircases that elegantly curved towards the wall. As I walked up, I could see all the old pictures that decorated the wall. There were old, antique pictures of my grandparents, the generations before them and the generations after. At the very top of the stairs I could see my moms at their wedding and a few more family photos including me.

I finished looking at the pictures and headed to one of the upstairs bedrooms. Upon opening the master bedroom, I noticed that the room was incredibly dusty. If I was going to sleep in the room for the night I would have to clean up a little and get some fresh air in.

I settled my luggage on the king sized bed and went to open the window. It took a bit of strength but I was eventually able to get it open. The room already started to feel a lot better. But if this one room was like this then the others must be in the same condition.

Instead of unpacking immediately and resting, I went downstairs to find the broom closet. I grabbed a clean rag and some polisher to start clearing away the dust. I traveled from room to room, opening windows and rubbing down the old furniture. To my surprise, a bunch of rooms were pretty decent. They weren't as dusty as I expected.

In fact, the bedrooms almost seemed recently lived in.

I shrugged it off, remembering that my grandparents would occasionally run a bed and breakfast out of their home for extra money. They must've cleaned the guest rooms last before they passed away. As my grandparents got older they began to sleep in smaller, separate beds. It would explain why the master bedroom was so bad.

I continued to make my way through the house, dusting and cleaning anything I could reach and opening windows to air out the house.

The house creaked slightly with each step and sometimes it did it by itself. I knew it was an old house but it almost sounded like someone else was living here still.

Again, it was probably just nothing. It didn't stop me from being a bit nervous though.

The entire house was mostly dust free and promised that I could rest easy tonight without suffocating. While I was cleaning the house I found my grandmother's Witch Room. She left a bunch of mason jars with herbs, plants that were slowly dying in their pots, and other materials scattered around like crystals and feathers and inks.

I went back to that room and looked through the scattered papers along the floors and shelves. They were all in Irish Gaelic with little English words scattered here and there. Old sketches flooded the papers as well.

I gathered them all up and stacked them on top of the wooden table. I promised myself to check them out later after I got settled into the house. It was getting late and I haven't eaten since the morning. I had to call my moms too to let them know I was safe.

Pulling my phone out of my back pocket, I called up a pizza place to order something quick. I was told that my mushroom and bacon pizza will be ready and delivered in less than thirty minutes. After thanking the person who took my order, I sat down at the family dining table on the first floor to Facetime my moms.

It only took about two rings before they picked up. My mom's red, frizzy hair was in a sloppy bun and she was wearing a black tank top covered in dirt. She probably started cleaning the house as soon as I left. She tended to clean when she was stressed, nervous or worried.

Her cool, ocean blue eyes lit up through the screen as she saw that I was perfectly safe and managed to make it to the mansion. "Hi, Ani! Oh, Olivia! Honey, Anise is on the phone!"

I could hear my ma run towards mom, excited to finally see me after waiting for me to get here. Her face appeared next to mom's, almost pushing her out of view. Her walnut wood skin was covered in sweat and showed signs of being slightly sun-burnt. She was most likely working in the garden before I called. "Anise! Oh my gods you're alive!"

"Yeah, Ma. I didn't die on the way here. Thank you for worrying about me. Once I got here I cleaned up some of the dust and opened the windows to circulate the air." I joked and explained.

"My baby is growing up! I already miss seeing her freckles that are scattered across her nose and cute cheeks, Avery!" Ma exclaimed to Mom, talking about me like I wasn't listening.

Mom pushed her away so she could have some camera time. "Don't you think I'm gonna miss her asking me to help dye her hair dark purple? I miss our baby too, ya know! Anyways, Ani, make sure you call us whenever something goes wrong, okay? Your ma and I love you very much and we want to help you get used to living on your own."

"I'll send you some boxes of purple hair dye, herbs, books, and cookies every month, Ani. If you need anything else that you can't afford on your own just call us and we'll send it over." Ma continued, her smoky quartz eyes tearing up.

I gave a small giggle and smiled. "Got it, ma. I'll be fine. I'm nineteen for crying out loud! I can take care of myself so there's no need to worry."

Mom frowned. "Of course we're gonna worry! We're your moms!"

The doorbell suddenly rang and I hovered my finger over the hang up button. "My pizza is here. Gotta go! I'll call you guys when the moving truck and handyman gets here. Love you!"

"Love you too, sweetie! Enjoy your pizza." They said goodbye. I hung up and went to answer the door.

I paid for the pizza and tipped the delivery guy. As soon as they left I close the creaky door and headed to one of the living rooms to watch some television. My grandparents should've had Netflix on all of the televisions as an app since guests would've most likely requested some modern media.

Turning on the TV, I sat down on a dusty, pink rose couch and tried to enjoy my pizza and Earth documentary. Most people my age weren't really in to documentaries, but I personally found them fascinating. It was like reading a nonfiction book but much quicker and much more entertaining.

Due to me watching mainly documentaries, my brain is filled with all sorts of facts from science to history and anything in between. It definitely made high school a breeze for me. It also helped convince my moms to let me take online college classes instead of going to an actual college.

An hour later, the cities episode ended and my pizza was completely gone. I checked the time and saw that it was 7:00 pm. Like the responsible adult I was, I got up, cleaned my mess and went to get ready for bed.

I decided to inspect the master bathroom before stripping down and using it. It would've been terrible if I noticed mold or spiders while I was bathing. To my astonishment, the bathroom was perfectly polished and cleaned. The marble counter was clear and dust-free, the shower was sparkling as well as the freestanding, claw-foot tub and even the towels seemed fresh.

Perhaps my grandparents still preferred to use the master bathroom?

I grabbed my bath essentials and began to draw up a bath. While the tub filled up with warm water, I put some music on from my phone. The sound echoed through the massive bathroom, almost drowning out the sound of the running rush of water from the faucet.

With a little bit of bubbles, some candles and crystals and some rose petals that I packed with me, I was ready to relax.

I slid right in and adored the quiet time I was able to have. There weren't a lot of opportunities to relax like this back when I lived with my moms. But now I was able to take a bath like this whenever I wished.

Just as I poured some lavender shampoo into my hand, there was a loud creak and footsteps from outside the bathroom door.

My heart sped up, my breathing stopped and I froze. There was no way that that was just the wind or the house settling. Unless I was going crazy, that was a stranger.

I stopped the music on my phone and sat in the bath in silence. I wasn't a particularly brave person so taking the time to muster up some courage to see if there was an intruder was necessary for me. With a few deep breaths and a reassuring nod to myself, I got up and grabbed a towel to cover myself with and began to check out the noise.

I opened the door very slowly and peered out. It didn't seem like anyone was in the bedroom and there was no evidence that anything was tampered with. I opened the door wider and noticed something on the wooden floor in front of me.

Bending over, I picked it up and held it in my hands. It was brown fur.

It suddenly hit me. During the few times I visited my grandparents I noticed that a few stray cats would occasionally roam around the property. Most of the windows from when I opened them up were still open. One of the cats must've found their way in and began to explore the mansion.

It was possible that the cat stepped in a particularly creaking spot in the floor and scared itself, causing it to run away. I knew that I would get freaked out if I heard a foreign sound seemingly coming from nowhere.

Hopefully, the cat would find its way outside without me intervening. The last thing I would want is to scare the poor thing with my presence.

I shrugged and went back to my bath. I wasn't able to enjoy it like I first did but it was still kinda pleasant. My time bathing was over within several minutes and I drained the tub. The only thing I packed as pajamas was an over-sized shirt that said "Inconceivable!"

Within a few minutes, my teeth were brushed and my purple hair was let loose from being in a tight bun all day. I changed the sheets on my bed with fresh ones I found from a linen closet. I made sure that all the windows were closed and all of the doors were locked before getting into bed.

Man, I was so tired. It's been a long day and I still had a long list of things to do. The moving guys and handyman were supposed to show up sometime tomorrow, I had to do some grocery shopping and budgeting, clean some more of the mansion and more.

It was best to get some sleep and be ready for all of that in the morning.

I rolled on to my side to find a more comfortable sleeping position and shut my eyes. Before I could fall asleep, I could feel the bed dip from extra weight and a body hovering over me. I snapped my eyes open and looked up to see a strange man with deep red eyes and white fangs inches away from my face. I couldn't help but scream.

"AHH!"

#creative writing #novel #romance #be prepared for there are gonna be 9 more chapters. . . #writeblr #reverse harem

[jcmorgenstern]

3x14 Review

Hey so for once this is actually super positive! I loved this episode and can’t wait to gush about it! So without further ado, I’m gonna get the stuff I quibbled with outta the way before diving into what I liked:

The Bad: — I think my biggest problem overall was that scene between Alec and Lorenzo. I understand Alec was being protective and he goes into Fierce Mommy Tiger mode around those he considers family and those he loves (I think it’s important to show that Magnus isn’t just his boyfriend, Magnus has become integrated into the thing Alec bases his life around). But I had hoped Alec would have figured out by now that a Nephilim threatening to depose a Downward leader over an apartment is…..unideal, at least. — I get that this may have been designed as a plot hook as an understandable yet stupid thing Alec does that comes back to bite him later (i.e., if there is a Downward civil war in New York, and Lorenzo decides to fuck Alec over). Alec’s strength and weaknesses are tied to his family, and I think it’s a very believable mistake for him to make. I don’t expect him to be perfect, I just hope the narrative treats his threat to Lorenzo as less of a “pure uwu cutesy bf” move and more of a mistake, even if Lorenzo is being cruel to Magnus. — Honestly y’all I expected something WAY worse. Losing the apartment was nothing compared to the drama I expected—I thought Lorenzo was gonna ask Magnus to spy on Alec or go back to Asmodeus or something awful. Thankfully that was inverted by a very obvious attempt to get Magnus to move in with Alec, because apparently he can’t buy a new house with all his money. — I also quibbled a little with how Clary was written, especially in that scene where Jace comforts her (or, really, when Jace makes what happened to her about him and how angry he is and how he’s going to kill Jonathan etc. It’s a pattern with him, esp where Jonathan is involved, and I have more to say about it). Clary has always been a very temperamental, look before you leap sort of person, and I’m not sure that if she figured out Jonathan had hurt Jace she would just smile and pretend along. Clary would FREAK. This is Jocelyn’s daughter, y’all. The knives would be out. She stabbed herself to stab him before and she’d do it again. She has ALL the tools at her disposal to rune him or run away. — To be clear, I’m not shaming Clary for what she chose to do or not confronting a violently entitled dude who kidnapped her once already, I just felt the arc was artificially extended to let Jace be the hero instead of letting Clary kick Jonathan’s ass off a pier and rune him. There’s no way that bitch can swim. It seemed kind of….not how Clary would react and kind of artificially done for Jace and Jonathan’s benefit. — Last thing, which isn’t even a quibble but I feel people will be confused if it’s not on here: the Maia and Jordan thing. I’ll go into it more but basically: if they’re doing what I think, I think it worked shockingly well, but if it’s played straight yeah it’ll be Unfortunate.

The Good: — I’m just gonna come out and say this episode was AMAZING. Since this is mostly a positive review I’d like to credit the writer specifically—Zoe Broad. Honestly just the overall coherence of this episode was greater than any of the ones in S3 for me, it flowed from one scene to the other and there was no point where I had the urge to check Facebook or whatever. The dialogue was pretty good overall and truly amazing at parts, and I felt she had a pretty good handle on the characters, despite this being her first episode, which was very impressive. — I actually ENJOYED the ship content??? Clace was absolutely adorable on the rink, with Jace’s sometimes annoying bravado being played wryly both on his part and by the script. “I was born ahead of the curve” delivered with a smile and then nearly falling on his ass was. Very good. And Clary’s little “you’re doing better than me….when I was six” was equally great and I just. Really liked it? They felt like real people on a real date and it felt real and dynamic and cute. — Same with Malec’s grave-robbing date. Usually their scenes start to get weighed down by drama or just general “talking to the audience to make them happy rather than each other,” but this was just cute AND advanced the plot, and connected them back to the main storyline. I hadn’t liked how they were quarantined away from the main story and I’m glad they’re back, even if the “losing Magnus’ loft” was a weird way to do it. — Maia and Alisha particularly were really the breakout stars of the episode. Alisha really really SOLD that dialogue and was honestly incredible. Her terror and anger and desperation felt so visceral and real that even though I knew it would be resolved in the episode, it was gripping and I genuinely needed to know what happened next. — I also did like how Zoe wrote Maia (that “frickin” was TOTALLY a stand in for fuck and I APPRECIATE it) and I felt she really captured how she feels about Jordan—she does care about him as a person, or rather for the person he was at some point, but still refuses to not to push down on her own anger and hurt for his or anyone else’s sake. I felt it was really complex and confusing and emotional for her and overall I think that scene was meant to give her a sense of closure. Just because she recognizes that Jordan does care about her and can be supportive of her, doesn’t mean she’ll necessarily jump back into his arms. — That’s kind of my reading—I’m not sure where they’re going, obviously, but my instinct was that the less chill stuff Maia says (implying they may be going a romantic arc) was more due to the fact she was PANICKING IN A LOCKED CLOSET WITH A DYING DUDE. Like she says “I’m confused” like yes she meant before but honestly right then she obviously was, and I don’t really see the show going for Jordan/Maia? Especially since Todd has hinted Maia has a “don’t need no man” arc. Like she drifts apart from Simon but gets back with someone she hated for years?? Not seeing it. — However if they do go there I’ll be really disappointed, mostly because of the missed opportunity for complexity but also because yeahhhhh maybe not the chillest thing with how many people interpret their relationship as abuse. (I could make a separate post about it but yeah). — Onto Magnus. God okay I don’t know how others felt but I felt Zoe really got to the crux of why Magnus misses his magic. That how he feels connected to the world through his magic was just…such a good insight and it really impacted me because it wasn’t just some generic “magic is what makes me who I am,” it was so much more deep and personal and I felt it meant a lot that Magnus finally put that into words for Alec. He’d clearly been struggling to impart to Alec how he felt, both in terms of “how do I even explain this loss” and a his own emotional reticence. God that grave robbing scene!!!! — Umm the Morningstar sword actually being a sword to summon demons?? Kind of weird?? Esp if they play it off as an actual Morgenstern relic?? Not sure what’s happening but it was cool?? — honestly dudes I’ve been FUCKED UP about the Luke storyline and SUPER STRESSED and now IT’S ALL HAPPENIGN someone SAVE HIM oh my GOD I’m actually so stressed I’ve been stressed for 9 months FREE HIM — Ok now to Jonathan bc lbr y’all know I can’t shut up about him. Ok first off, that scene with the seelie gal, oh my FUCKING GOD I was screaming what a LOSER GHSDKLFJhghghhghgg. And she insults his shitty dialogue?? Zoe ma’am may I PROPOSE??? This keeps getting wilder and wilder I can’t believe they’re GOING THERE. THEY’RE GOING THERE SO HARD. HE’S SUCH A WILD LOSER. Can you BELIEVE he found someone off shadow world fetlife to be like “I’m a Morgenstern and I love you bro you’re so hot and clever and lovable” I just can’t. I bet you ANYTHING she tops and is only in it for the shadow hunter ass. — SHAPESHIFTING. YALL. I BUST A NUT. Look, it fixes so many fucking plot holes. His eyes look SO COOL when he does demon magic. He’s so OP and Chaotic Stupid it’s not even a joke  I Lov my Mary Sue Son. — Honestly having Jonathan impersonate Jace is so brilliant (remember when he said, “I don’t want your pity, I want your life?”) Like it is so fucked up but I love it.  Not looking forward to the mind control but maybe he just whispered “I’m a bottom” into her ear and ran off in her ensuing shock and confusion. You can’t prove me wrong until next week so until then LA LA LA LA CAN’T HEAR YOU — Personally I liked Dom’s performance as Jonathan, but not to be that Bitch I felt Will was a lot more subtle about it. Dom gave him a straight up thousand mile stare whereas Will played him as something charismatic and good at lying with a little edge of Something Wrong, a strain behind a smile. Sure, Jonathan was probably nervous for his little kidnapping date, but I felt it was unrealistic that he was so suave and convincing (sans the part where Aline comes to visit him that was hilarious, Jonathan you’re an idiot) as Seb and then is like “I eat ants sometimes” as Jace. Like. He’s an obsessive bitch. He’d have practiced Jace in the mirror. Fuck you. Probably while saying “fuck you.” ANYWAYS. — Izzy doing science? It’s not much but I’ll fucking take it lmao. I’m excited to see where Heavenly Fire is going. Matt’s Latin is still abysmal but whatever it’s ok. — also that rose?? A kiss from a rose?? Honestly this ep was so clever and thematically connected and just FLOWED like an ACTUAL EP OF TV god I’m emotional!!!! Thank you Zoe Broad ma’am you are a hero!!! — Again I’m gonna point out both Jace and Jonathan have a designated Brooding Fireplace. — Not super hyped about Heidi coming back but hey this ep was Worth It.

Anyway tldr I really liked it and wanted to spew semi-coherent positivity for once! About more characters than just my stupid fave!!! Wow!!! Good writing is SEXY and I LOVE IT!!!

#sh spoilers #seriously tho it was really good and coherent and there were real human emotions!!! and conversation!!!!! #welcome to my crispy mind

[soft-sarcasm]

hong jisoo: understood.

Pairing: hong jisoo x reader.

Summary: there’s something unexplainably wonderful about finally being understood.

Genre: fluff, basically just another self-serving ramble about anxiety affecting a relationship.

Word count: 1.7+k.

a/n: I swear this isn’t the only thing I know how to write but these are just what keeps coming out every time I start to write. I think I’m just slightly obsessed with the idea of someone anxiety being in a relationship with someone who actually understands it, though this is definitely an oversimplification. This is just another fluff piece with no real weight but it just happened so enjoy if you want.

 There was nothing but love and warmth waiting for you. Nothing but acceptance and adoration, and yet, you couldn’t move from your place hunched over your front table, phone blinking up at you with each new message, there being no point in even reading them as you were already aware of their contents.

What you are you doing right now?

Where are you?

Are you okay?

Are you okay? Are you okay? Are you, okay? 

 It was a question that had been asked of you far too often for your liking. By people who cared, but also by those who didn’t. By your parents who were concerned for a daughter going through a disease they couldn’t see and couldn’t help but not understand, by friends who understood slightly better but still couldn’t fully comprehend the weight that compressed your brain, by doctors who peered at you from warped leather chair and while you knew they were meant to understand, their psychoanalysis rarely ever actually appealed to you. And now there was your boyfriend, your first romantic partner in the entirety of your life due to your small problem of your complete apprehension of relationships and growing attached to people.

It wasn’t that you couldn’t muster loving emotions, or that you never had, it’s just that you had never felt this strongly for anyone and that was probably why you were huddled away from your boyfriend of six months. This was not your first episode during your relationship, it was just he was rarely in the country when one did happen. You could usually push past your own defaults when your limited time together ever came around, enjoying the brief touches of contact you were allowed with his hectic schedule and your burdening school load.

This was not the case for today it seemed, because while you were meant to already be headed over to your meet up spot of Joshua’s favourite coffee shop that was populated by too many elderly people for anyone to recognise him, you were still trapped in your shoe box of an apartment, head stuffed full of damming thoughts and body incapable of any movement. You hated that today had to be the day of an episode, especially as it was so rare that you and Joshua ever saw each other, the times you actually had a date outside being even rarer. And he had been so excited, so excited that he finally got a day off and that he could finally take you out. Fuck, your anxiety was the worse.

You finally reached for the phone that was still accepting messages, but now less frequently, swiping the screen and pulling up his most recent one.

Shua: are you on your way yet?

That made your chest cave, the clear optimism making your heart clench. He truly was too good for you, too loving and gentle for all your many dysfunctions. You could picture him now; head tucked under one of his many caps, face concealed behind a thin shroud of a mask, probably bundled in some collage of stylish layers and altogether just looking stunning. He was probably waiting for you, no, he was most definitely waiting for you from his messages. What were you meant to tell him?

Hey sorry, anxiety decided to come fuck with me today and I currently leave the house because my brain is making me feel like I’ll actually die if I do and it doesn’t help that I love you so fucking much that it makes my heart want to explode.

So yeah, rain check?  

Why don’t you just put a fucking stamp on your forehead that says ‘hey, don’t date me, I over think everything and sometimes can’t leave the house for no good reason, run while you still can!’ Then you wouldn’t have ended up somehow tricking this beautiful creature into think that you were a functioning enough human being to date. Self-destructing things did usually come with some sort of warning, it was only right that you let the world know so they can stay clear.

You let out a snort, the picture of you walking around with a sign that large on your forehead bringing a flicker of humour into your current grey mood. The humour was sapped from you as another message from Joshua arrived.

Shua: Is everything okay over there?

Shua: ?????

You had to answer him now, before he got too worked up with worry and did something stupid like come over to your place, which you could not have because while you were actually dressed for your date, you were certain your face was an unattractive shade of greenish pale and you couldn’t imagine how frazzled your expression was. So you brought your fingers down on the keypad, pressing down the appropriate characters to spell out the ever stereotypical, but highly effective, ‘Yeah, I’m alright.’ Once you sent that you would have more time to come up some sort of excuse. But it couldn’t be anything that he would feel the need to come over and take care of you for. Something like an unexpected assignment from one of your professors or something trivial but still with enough weight that it was a justifiable excuse.

Just as you were about to hit send, the noise of a small scuffle came through your permanently locked door, followed by the scrape of metal fitting into a lock and the accompanying twist of a key so that your door was opening. It seemed that you definitely had grown overly familiar with Joshua as he looked almost exactly how you pictured him to, effortlessly beautiful in his many layers, hat and face mask that he pulled under his chin at the sight of you thanks to your mini dining table being perfectly in line with your entryway due to the layout of your apartment. Which basically meant that there was no pretending you weren’t home as he stared directly at you, expression unreadable.

You stood up instantly, stomach twisting as he stepped through the door and began to step out of his shoes, your mind reeling as you began to scramble, “I have a completely valid reason as to why I didn’t meet up with you, there was a paper- no a friend! A friend needed my help- no it was the paper thing, an assignment! Yes, an assignment that’s why I couldn’t meet you.” You knew you weren’t making any sense but you weren’t completely coherent as you watched him take off his jacket and make his way towards you, your already hazed mind trying to make some sort of justification. But by the time he was actually in front of you, you knew it was just better to cave and apologise rather than make excuses. “Look, Joshua, I’m so sorry, I really didn’t mean to stand you, I just-couldn’t. I know that doesn’t make any sense and you don’t deserve this, and I can’t even explain it to you to make you understand,” It was making you nervous, with him just staring at you and not saying anything which leads you to just ramble more. “And you don’t need to understand to know that I’m sorry, for taking up your free time when you never get any and making you worried. My brain just- ugh- my brain hates me and sometimes-”

You were cut off by him suddenly grabbing your hands that had been flailing uncontrollably in hopes of being able to better convey your words, the coolness of his flesh contrasting against your own clammy skin. The act made you actually look at him for the first time, brown eyes filled with warmth that shocked the cold right out of your bones.

“You can stop apologising now,” He spoke so gently, his ever soothing tone rippling over you like the laps of a heated bath, instantly calming you. When you remained silent, the grip on your hands tightened and a small smile pulled at his lips, “Good. Now I’m going to tell you that you have no reason to apologise because I get it, or at least I get as much as I can, sometimes we all just can’t do it. And I also want you to know that you never need to feel like you need to force yourself for me, because you don’t, ever.”

You couldn’t stop the swelling of your heart at the sincerity of his words, feeling less deserving than ever of this fathomlessly perfect man in front of you but when you opened your mouth to voice this, you were shushed.

“No, I can only imagine what it’s like to have the kind of anxiety you do and I can’t speak from any kind of experience so I’m not gonna pretend that I can. All I’m going to say is that I’m forever here for you, even when you can’t leave the house for what you feel like is no reason at all because any reason to you is a valid one. So don’t ever doubt yourself. And to be honest, you know that I much prefer staying indoors anyway so screw the outside world, we can just stay here forever!”

You were close to crying now, feeling this strange mixture of heart straining love and unexplainable relief that this person, this person that you cared so much about somehow just understood you. This inexplicable feeling leads you to impulsively throw yourself into his arms, all but knocking him to the floor.

And then before you could even catch the words, they were spilling from your lips, “I fucking love you so fucking much.”

Six months and an anxiety attack, that’s what it had taken for you truly realise your feelings for Joshua and while you knew you should probably feel like you were dying from an overload of emotions that usually caused you more stress, you were impossibly relieved as you clung to him, repeating the words over and over again. You could feel the rumble of his laughter due to your closeness, the lack of space between you two intensified as he pulled up against him, his smile present against your neck as he pressed a kiss to the exposed skin.

“I fucking love you so fucking much as well, so don’t even worry about it.”

#writing #kpop scenarios #seventeen scenarios #joshua scenarios #kpop fluff #seventeen fluff #joshua fluff #kpop #seventeen #joshua #hong jisoo #joshua hong #scenarios #seventeen smut #kpop smut #joshua smut