#but if i don't use my hands/cook often (and working on a computer does not count) i WILL start chewing the furniture so jot that down

[batemanofficial]

me at 17: whew working in a kitchen is hard. i can't wait to have a real adult job where i get paid to fuck around on google docs all day

me at 21: whew fucking around on google docs all day is fucking boring. i would kill to be in a kitchen again

#speak friend and enter #cycles and motifs etc etc #i'm combing thru indeed and ive got two diff tabs open (1 for film jobs and 1 for restaurant work) #bc a lot of the film work in the cities where i want to do it is remote so like. the prospect of being a part time line cook again #is very compelling #i didn't go to culinary school because i'm afraid that commodifying my love of cooking will make me hate it #but if i don't use my hands/cook often (and working on a computer does not count) i WILL start chewing the furniture so jot that down

[bakughosts]

SPARE VAMPIRE BKG THOUGHTS ??? SPARE VAMPIRE BKG THOUGHTS SIR MAAM ??

omg i have been traveling so it took me forever to respond to this because i wanted to be able to type out my Thoughts on the computer but WILLOW omg..... u spoil me by asking this. because i have so many and they constantly live in my brain ldfskjfslkdjf

i think what i love about bkg so much as a character is that he has desires but most of those desires take the form of achieving a goal. he has so many things he wants to be the best at and so many heights he wants to reach and yeah, part of this is because he's an ambitious person but part of it is because of his ego and his insecurity and the expectations placed upon him by the people around him/society at large. and i think bkg in any context has these things that he wants to achieve because his desire to reach his lofty goals is integral to his character.

and vampire bkg... think of all that time. what do you do when you've achieved everything you've ever wanted to achieve? what's left after that? for a century he has been achieving his goals, and now he has everything. money and power and even respect from locals in the villages near his castle (though that respect is tinged heavily with fear, because even if they don't know exactly what the handsome bachelor that lives inside the creepy but beautiful castle on the horizon is, they know he's something other... and not to mention he looks exactly like his father, and exactly like his father's father, and isn't it strange that none of us have ever seen their wives, have never seen these men at any point in their lives outside of their late twenties/early thirties?)

i don't think stagnation sits well with bkg. i don't think he's ever learned how to be still. despite having unlimited time, he had to accomplish everything as quick as possible, because he just wanted it all. he wanted to be the best so bad that it sung in his veins like adrenaline. and now, in the aftermath, he feels that same emptiness. adrenaline come and gone and only a hollow tiredness in its wake. now is when you feel the pain--nothing distracts you from it.

and one day... you, cat-curious, find your way to his castle. (this has gotten long lmao so im gonna put a read more)

maybe you're a traveler, or an adventurer, or simply someone in one of the nearby villages that doesn't believe the rumors. but no matter who you are and where you come from, you've heard the stories of his Otherness. though you don't know it yet, just like him, you thrive best with adrenaline thrumming through your veins--you thrive when you have something to want. and you want to know the secrets behind the Otherness that everyone else is so afraid of.

does that mean you're not afraid? god, no. of course you are. but you've reached his castle under an auspicious moon and you're sure this is a good omen.

here is why desire is such a dangerous thing: it is often insatiable. for a long, long time, bkg has survived from the blood of his livestock which he cares for, from game on his land. deer in spring, grouse in winter. to live like that for so long, and then to have something so much more tempting come directly to him, delivered to his doorstep--it's almost like a gift.

at the same time, i don't think bkg relishes the idea of drinking human blood, and certainly not killing a human. i think he could be a bloodthirsty vampire, but specifically when it comes to vengeance. he could hurt someone that wronged him, but not someone whose only crime is their curiosity.

you offer to work for him. to clean his castle, to tend his grounds, to care for his cattle. you know how to cook and how to bake (though you're unaware that this means little to him), and you have more fortitude than your appearance belies--his long-fallow farmland would thrive under your hands if he gave you the opportunity to work with it.

if it was years ago and he was still the same man, he might have said no. but it's hard to care when you feel empty. fine, he says. but don't expect fancy lodging or riches beyond measure.

you work, you investigate, you sleep. it's a cycle. and bkg watches you the whole time, though you're none the wiser. he's smart. he knows what you're doing. but you've broken up the monotony for him.

there's no food in his pantries, and you have to find him to ask for coin to go into town and buy groceries. he doesn't provide you the coin directly--a smart move, perhaps--but later that day, what you've requested has been stocked in the pantry shelves. and that's how you mainly interact with him for a while--weeks, maybe. you wake at dawn and clear the land and feed the cows and pigs and begin the monstrous task of cleaning a castle that has been left to rot and you go to the room you've chosen when the sun is long set, settle into your moth-eaten bed, and sleep harder than you've ever done in your life. if you need tools, feed for the cattle, groceries, supplies to clean, you relay this to him, often finding him in his study reading or in the greenhouse, pruning exotic plants. he never gives you more than nods and grunted words of acquiescence, but despite his temperament, he always provides what you ask for.

he's surprised by your tenacity. by your boldness, to ask for so much, even if it's not for your direct benefit. when you cook dinner each night, you make a serving for him as well. he can admit, begrudgingly, though you are in his space and disrupting his quiet, that he admires the way you chop vegetables so uniformly, that you're so careful with the way you measure out the spices he has filled his cabinets with for you.

and above all, for the first time in a long time, he feels something like desire.

he's never been intrigued by other people--he has friends, other vampires he has known for decades (kirishima and mina), but their friendship was foisted upon him until he gave in. he doesn't think he's intrigued by you. but your blood--

it has been a very long time since he has been tempted by something so sweet.

(i think there has to be so much context for this situation because i truly believe that the longer bkg is alone, the harder it is for him to let someone in. after a century of shutting himself away, it would be almost impossible for him to open himself back up in any significant way. it's the situation that allows for this desire to grow. the lack of anything else to hold his attention, the feeling of achieving everything you've ever wanted to achieve and having nothing left to strive for, the unobtrusive yet spellbinding nature of your presence. he remembers what it was like to want something. this, at first, is what draws him to you. nothing more.)

vampires are always hungry. even when sated, they know that hunger is going to return. there's nothing to stop it. it's the nature of their existence. so yes, at first, it's his hunger that draws him to you, though he wouldn't ever do anything about it.

he talks to you more. finds out things about you. your father was a drunkard and you never smile with teeth. you've worked on farms since late childhood and your right pinkie is crooked from a bad break. you read romance novels late at night and deny that you've been in his library when he asks you about it.

and after dinners spent together where he doesn't eat, after early evenings when he joins you outside to feed the cows, he tells himself this pull he feels is because of that hunger. because of that desire--not for you, but for the lifeblood that nearly intoxicates him just by scent if he gets too close to you.

(though you are aware of his Otherness, he is disarming to you. it's something about the earnestness in everything he does, despite his gruff exterior. he seems rusty at conversation, but his efforts are genuine. he doesn't eat your food, but he picks at it so as to not make you feel bad. you find this more endearing than you care to say aloud.)

and then kirishima and mina visit, and they meet you, his new human employee that lives in his castle and reads his books and touches his shoulder gently when he steadies a ladder for them so they can rehang one of the long-covered paintings in the drawing room, as if he has ever let anyone touch him, as if he has ever let anyone close enough to try--

and it's kirishima that finally asks what's going on, and when bkg says nothing, obviously, he asks again because he knows his best friend better than anyone else in the world--now, perhaps, better than anyone except you--and the truth is more simple than expected.

for so long, bkg had only ever experienced desire as hunger. hunger for blood, hunger for power, hunger for everything greater in the world. he was hungry to be the best. whatever that meant. because becoming the best meant that no one could question him. no one could doubt that he was powerful and all the things that came along with it. no one but himself. surely, he had thought, once he got to the top he would stop having those doubts because he would, unassailably, be the best.

just like hunger, doubt is something that can never be truly sated.

and for a long time he sat with that.

but then, to his own surprise, he was shown that desire can be something other than hunger. something softer, a smile with less teeth. desire can be vegetables chopped precisely, or dirt from the fields caked under fingernails, or a badly-healed little finger. desire can be a gentle hand on his shoulder, an act of trust: i know you'll be there to steady me.

he never knew he could want something without being hungry. never knew he could have his teeth to someone's throat without drawing blood. but now it's all he wants to do.

#i like am going insane over this #willow i'm SO sorry it's a big ass thing #like this has been living in my head for so long #the idea of him being like. i want i want i want and not knowing how to separate that from the hunger he's always had #and then learning. and then realizing that desire without hunger can be even more fulfilling than the ravenous want he felt throughout yout #like omg..... #thank u for sending in an ask. i am honored #HONORED #and i am sorry for my fuckin. rant lmaoooooooooooo #please whenever u want to talk about vampire bkg. hmu #i'm obsessed

[blot-squisher]

Have you done an alphabet for Jeff? Jeff is my baby <3333

SFW Alphabet Ask Meme for Surviving the Game Jeffrey "Jeff" Johansen!

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?) Jeff is very quiet with his affection. He shows it best in private moments and in soft, genuine ways. Don't be surprised to find a small painting on your table one morning, quietly left for you to find.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?) Jeff prefers solitude, but if you're comfortable with long stretches of not speaking and allowing music to fill the silence, you'll quickly become good friends.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?) Jeff is often very touch averse. It's not that he doesn't like to hold his partner, but more that he's not comfortable feeling crowded. Stretching out together on the couch or on a blanket so he's got plenty of space is usually best.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?) Jeff is used to the bachelor lifestyle and the responsibilities that come with it. That being said, his house is usually covered in paint, art projects in progress, and a lot of empty take out containers. He's unintentionally drunk paint water more than a few times.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?) Privately, and without malice. Even if the relationship ends on poor terms, he's not one to cause more bad blood or start a fight. He's seen enough of that and has no time for it in his life anymore.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?) Although he would be willing to get married to the right person, it would be a very, very long road to get there. Jeff believes in taking his time, and a relationship as important as that shouldn't be rushed.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?) Usually very soft spoken, Jeff's hands are as gentle as his voice. He can and will fight if need be, but he'll always try to work things out without violence first.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?) Jeff will rarely instigate a hug and may even shy away from them if he's feeling overwhelmed. He's not a fan of crowds and dislikes the feeling of being mobbed. On the rare occasions he does hug, it's very easy to relax to the point of wanting to fall asleep.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?) It'll take a while, but don't worry. It's not that he doesn't care or have feelings, he's just trying to find the right time and way to express himself.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?) Jeff expresses himself best through his art. Although he's not a terribly jealous person, when such feelings do arise he works it out through his favorite mediums. Art and music.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss their partner? Where do they like to be kissed?) Jeff enjoys taking his time, kissing his partner all across their body. He isn't particular about where he's kissed, really, as he prefers to be the one offering touch.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?) Jeff isn't overly fond of children simply because they (usually) have no concept of personal space or volume. He doesn't dislike them and would actually make a fantastic father, but he prefers to avoid other peoples kids.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?) Sitting on the porch drinking coffee as the sun rises. Or, if you're in the Pocket, sitting on the porch drinking coffee and watching the swirling void sky. Hey, inspiration is inspiration.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?) Sitting on the porch, but drinking home brewed beer. If he's not on the porch, he'll either be in front of his drawing pad, computer, or other canvas.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?) Honestly, it'll probably be at least a couple of years before you even learn his middle name.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?) Jeff may put on a mean face at times to keep people away from him, but he's actually rather calm and collected.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about their partner? Do they remember every little detail they mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?) So used to solitude, it can take Jeff a while to start remembering things. He's not doing it to be hurtful, he just isn't used to taking that kind of care of another person.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in their relationship?) The first time he told a joke and got a genuine laugh out of you. He wasn't expecting it, as he usually only told jokes to his dog. It's nice to get a positive reaction like that out of someone.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect their partner? How would they like to be protected?) Jeff is very protective over his loved ones, and if words don't work, he's not afraid to get into the fray. He doesn't want anyone to get hurt on his behalf, so if you can talk down a situation (or at least try before jumping straight to violence) it'll go a very long way in his book.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?) It'll really just depend on the occasion and how far ahead of time he remembers it's coming up. Chances are he'll do something small and private though, even if it is a little late.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?) Jeff will go hyper absorbed in his work and lose time. How long has he been sitting in front of his computer? Has he eaten today? Has he slept? The answer is probably not...

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?) He's very picky about what kind of beard shampoo he uses, but other than that he's really not very concerned with his looks.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without their partner?) Jeff is used to living alone, but if he lost someone that important to him, it would deeply and greatly affect him for a long time.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.) Jeff doesn't mind cats, but he greatly prefers dogs. Dogs don't tend to jump on tables, knock over paint water, or leave little paw prints all over drying canvas...

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?) Loud noisy people who don't respect personal space or alone time. He's not opposed to listening to his music at a slightly higher volume, but he still tries to keep it at a respectful level.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?) What is sleep?

#surviving the game fic #sfw alphabet #jeff johansen #dbd jeff #writing thoughts

[darth-lemoncupid]

🖊 + Emma!

so happy you asked! especially because a good chunk of my (now) 80 hours of playing is literally dedicated to my darling sith warrior. i played liffessia today and wasn't feeling it as much (but it may also be because i'm tired).

anyways i think she's so pretty (the game doesn't run at a higher resolution rn because i don't want my computer to die running its fan).

anyways, here are some things about her (certain things).

sweetest tooth to ever exist

sweets can be expensive and desserts are very laborious to make. because of all the money and time and effort it takes into making them, she rarely had sweets as a child. as an adult, she eats anything sweet left and right. does not matter what. she's willing to try any dessert or sweet at least once. quinn finds it very concerning how much sweet things she eats.

everyone's asian mom

in that she's always cutting fruit when she can. to be fair, it's a habit. she used to work in the kitchen and spent a lot of time cutting fruit. she does love fruit, all kinds. but her taste in fruit can get quite expensive because she was restricted from eating these fruits as a child. not that she can't enjoy the simpler fruits but having access to wealth meant she could eat the fruits she was previously not allowed to eat. emma's favorite fruits are mango-like and dragonfruit-esque fruits native to eria, her home planet, as well as a fruit with a similar texture to a korean pear.

forget rations

emma very much has a preference for cooking, considering that was part of her labor as a servant. she would often go out to markets to buy the fresh produce and meats used for the meals that day. so when she can, she prefers to cook. it's time consuming yes, but the ship smells really good afterwards. although no one is allowed in the kitchen when emma's cooking. she almost stabbed quinn and pierce when they came in.

too many branches

the nymeria family is a big family. her grandfather, xandtris, had a good amount of children. six to be precise. three women, two men, and one child. emma is the child of the third child and secondborn daughter: carielia. all of her aunts and her uncles and her pibling are married with children so she has plenty of cousins. and then her mother also married and had kids, so she has half-siblings as well. she's the only child of her father, eddie. (so basically i have to visualize this family tree now)

cousins are awful

many people ask emma how she got her scar. from a brutal battle? did a smuggler attack her at an erian market? what about a hostile acolyte? the story is actually much sadder. when one of her cousins decided to take out his emotions on her father, who had done nothing but be a faithful servant, she had to step in. because of emma's defiance, her cousin cut her face. that was also the first time she used the force, force choking her cousin. it's not a bad scene to imagine, force choking someone while there's blood running down your face. but the scar became something her cousin constantly demeaned her for. "how can you be sith when i was able to cut you so easily?"

family heirloom

xandtris's daughters decided not to dedicate their lives to being sith. so when emma fell into his hands, he decided to turn her into the sith his daughters decided not to be. thus, he passes down onto her a ferronnière-esque headband with a metal ornament. it was a symbol of the sith women in their family.

battle scars

for a few years after getting her scar, emma would put cosmetics on it in order to hide it better. you could still tell it was there, but she was able to color correct and blend enough that it reduced its presence. it wasn't until she got to the sith academy on korriban did people tell her to stop hiding it. it was a symbol of pride, a symbol of being sith before she knew she was sith. so she stopped covering it up with the encouragement of her peers.

first love

before becoming sith, emma actually had a long term, healthy relationship with her childhood friend prialik. a red twi'lek boy, they interacted a lot as children while working on the nymeria estate. their relationship lasted a good four years, with her scarring and the revelation of her true parentage happening a year after they got together in secret. a lot of people are surprised to learn that emma had a relationship in general considering that she appears to be very career oriented. quinn was surprised to learn this and so was vette (it was something to tease her lord about). they grew distant as her grandfather started training her to be a sith and prep her for the sith academy on korriban. to be fair, not exactly their fault (that's kind of what happens when you have an asshole for a grandpa). emma used to skip her sith lessons to be with her boyfriend. but she stopped after her grandfather threatened to kill prialik. in turn, her grandfather gave the young twi'lek man a large sum of credits to use to start a new life and find his mother and sister. so like anyone, prialik took the money. he left emma at their spot, where she waited all night for him. they were supposed to spend her last night on eria together only for him to not show up, paid by her grandfather to basically break up with her. she left heartbroken and was given the advice to use her heartbreak as a fuel for her anger and hatred. but emma could never hate prialik, her first love.

gentle beauty

emma was considered a gentle beauty among the nymeria estate on eria whether it's from other servants or the people at the markets that saw her almost every day. she was known to be softspoken, have a light touch, and have soft hands. she also had long hair, often put in a hairnet or tied up. she didn't cut her hair until the morning she was supposed to leave for the korriban sith academy, deciding to enter the new stage of her life with a different look. after all, sith weren't supposed to look gentle and soft, right? even with her scar, lots of people on eria acknowledged her gentle beauty. the main issue now is that she's changed. she's changed a lot.

#swtor #swtor oc #swtor sith warrior #sith warrior #emma nymeria

[dustofthedailylife]

I have to wait a bit, before I sit in front of my computer to reblog your work (I can't put tags on my phone for some reason T~T).

But in the mean time, does Pierro even have taste buds? To drink Fire Water (vodka) just like that... You don't do that. I would make him drink tea instead. 🤔

By the way, an interesting thing, that I as a Snezhnayan (I am Russian) have to tell you. Maybe you can use it later in your chapters!! :D

Russian people really love tea, surprisingly. Every imigrant that I've listened to on YouTube wondered how much people like tea in Russia. I am an exception, but my whole family likes tea a lot and half of our cabinet is filled with different sorts of teas. Drinking tea is more of an excuse to chat, actually. We REALLY love to talk over a cup of tea with some sweets! It's a tradition at this point. Whenever you invite someone to your home, you're also inviting them for a cup of tea so you could chat about anything and everything! Also, whenever we invite someone to our home, we feel the need to cook something or at least have food ready for our guests to eat if they ever get hungry. As soon as the guest is wondering to the kitchen, you need to offer some type food: from cupcakes to leftovers (if you haven’t cooked anything at all for the guest). Cookies are almost a must. Any sweets are fine because you need to eat them with a cup of warm tea.

Part of why we drink vodka too. If you don't drink tea with your friends, then you're drinking vodka in their company. There're two ways of bonding for us, as you can see. 😆

Aaaanyway, the story is cooking very nicely! The circumstances are playing in The Clown's favour for now. But will it be like that for the rest of the chapters? Ohohoho! >:D

Also, did Diluc even notice that the agent wanted to hand The Clown a bag of money. Did he notice??? Is that a spoiler? I really wonder what this encounter means for the story. You wouldn't put it here for no reason, would you? This situation must be brought up in the near future, right? >:0

Or I'm overthinking things.... Or am I????

Also, do you headcanon that Diluc could almost kill the number three Fatui Harbinger? She must be hella strong. How have you came up with this idea?? I want to know your thoughts!

I, personally, think that she might have some psychodelia powers or something. Usually, when asians (as in Japanese, but Mihoyo takes a huge inspiration from Japanese anime, so...) draw a wicked character with a bandage over her/his head, that definately means that this character has some mind tricking powers. She looks weak — boney arms, petite figure. And yet she can strike fear in one of the strongest people. Considering her reaction to Signora's dead, I came to conclusion that she must have some mind manupilation powers or something. She's sick on her head!

Gah! This has become a long message! I'm so sorry! I'm waiting for the next chapters to come! You're doing great! :D

Haha, to answer your first question he probably doesn't have taste buds lol! Interestingly enough, before I started writing the fic I was under the impression that fire water was meant to be vodka (I do still believe it's a reference to it) but in the world of Teyvat it isn't a spirit like vodka is but instead it's... wine. I was quite surprised about it.

That's why I made him drink it just like that as well. Plus in a world quest a Fatui Mage drank Fire water pure as well ("Lost in a Foreign Land" - Chasm world quest), so they seem to do that in Teyvat.

Funnily enough in that world quest she did also mention tea but her milk was spoiled so that's why she drank Fire Water there 😂

It's also funny you mention you offer your guests food because that reminds me of a good friend I had back in school. She was Russian and every time I came over her mum asked me if I'm hungry or often just brought us some pancakes (not directly pancakes, she called them 'Blinis' don't exactly remember anymore though).

It's always interesting to learn about different cultures, so thanks for that 😊

Back to the fic, will the odds be in out favor for much longer? Did he notice the agent slipping money in our pocket? We shall see *rubs hands* 😈

As for Pulcinella who I hc to have been attacked during Diluc's vendetta after his father's death. He is the 5th Harbinger so I think you got him mixed up with Columbina there. Pulcinella, or the Rooster, is the major of Snezhnaya and was the little old man with the long nose in the trailer. I chose him with the thought that he is 1) not too high up the rank and 2) attempting to kill the major is probably what Diluc would to do cause significant damage for the organization imo, plus it would certainly bring in the attention of the rest of the Harbingers. 🤔

Thank you for your long ask!! 😊

#🍁 dust mail #🍁 mail from: polalcee

[erigold13261]

(TW: unreality) Do you play games with Mahito? Or Hanami? Does Jogo even like playing games?

Hmmm, I'd say I mostly do parallel play with Mahito. At least recently since I've been into more single player games at the moment (and also only have 1 computer and not a lot of physical games).

I've been playing a lot of Stardew Valley recently, and I made a little Mahito to play as (with a Hanami cat lol). Mahito on the other hand has been playing the Sims and made a little me to torture (I am his little artist money maker in the basement while he messes with the other Sims in the game. At least I'm not in the pool like Jogo's Sim).

Jogo isn't interested in video games at all, but we have played games like chess and card games. I wish I had more physical games but I don't, so sometimes we'll play a digital version of those games (I've seen him playing Mahjong and Solitaire on my computer without me offering him my computer.

Pretty sure Mahito or Hanami gave him access because Jogo usually doesn't care about my electronics enough to know my passwords and I keep forgetting to write them down for him or the others who might want to use my stuff while I'm at work or asleep (thankfully they don't play on them as much when I'm trying to sleep as they all know I like a really dark room).

Hanami, and honestly Dagon, are more watchers than they are players. Hanami is a bit more open to trying out a game with me, but honestly her and Dagon seem to have just as much fun watching me play as they do playing themselves.

I'm sure if I had more physical games to play they all would be more happy to play those than the computer games I have. Either that or I should try to get my old Playstation 2 or Gamecube up and running to play some of those old co-op games I played a lot as a kid! I think at least Mahito would love playing those with me while Hanami and Dagon watched (and Jogo reluctantly watches but is secretly happy to be part of our little group lol, he tries to hide his happiness with annoyance but we all know he's having fun).

Little fun fact! Even though Hanami doesn't play a lot of the games, she watches me the most! (it helps she'll sometimes be in my gaming chair so I have to sit on her lap so she's kinda forced to watch me lol) So if I need to leave for a moment and don't want to pause my game for whatever reason (or it's an idle game that has some inputs needed) I can always trust Hanami to continue playing for a bit while I do whatever I need to do.

Mahito on the other hand will purposely try to mess my shit up. He's a little bitch but SO FAR he hasn't done anything too destructive in my games that I could reload my save or fix.

So yea, the curses are a mixed bag when it comes to games. For the most part they are all pretty on board with playing games, some more than others, but are also pretty chill with just sitting and watching me play games (I will say it is really fun to be playing a strategy game or even just my farming game, and having Jogo sitting by me being a little backseat driver while I play by reminding me of what I need to get done or when to plant my crops or whatever).

Kurourushi, Ko-Guy, and Dotty (Smallpox Deity nickname I gave her she doesn't seem to mind) don't seem all that interested in the games I play. I'm sure I can find a game they like at some point, but overall they aren't really that interested (very tempted in giving Kurourushi or Ko-Guy my old DS with Cooking Mama and see if they like that game at all considering those 2 really like helping me cook).

Kechizu, Eso, and Choso aren't around that often so I don't really know how they feel about games. Pretty sure they would all be find with playing some games with me and the others at some point. I have a feeling Eso and/or Choso might like the Sims just for the character customization part of the game lol!

#unreality #eritalks #jjktalk #noart #asks #i don't have much games for them to play #that aren't video games #and h/anami and d/agon's hands are kinda too big #for the controllers or keyboard #at least to comfortably play some more competitive games #more relaxed games seem to be easier for them #which works considering they are into those games more #i should get some more horror games #those seem to be a group favorite to play and watch #:3

[dystopiandilfs]

Dream's discord podcast. Basically him answering questions for 2.5 hours. This will sort of be in order but I fucked up my notes so it might not be in order completely. (From 13th May 2021)

For reference the photos at the end are: A prototype of fidget spinner merch as loads of people asked, a reference photo of his favourite merch and a photo he sent of his hair to prove he wasn't a brunette.

•He said his teeth are mostly straight but he's thought about getting Invisalign. He's never had braces. He has a tiny gap in the left side of his mouth and his canines are longer and sharper (vampire arc). He's never had teeth surgery so has his wisdom teeth still.

•He thinks pineapple on pizza is good.

•He likes seafood like lobster and crab. He had crab made in an air fryer last night. He like peas. He thinks quesadillas are good and likes most food.

•He hates Coffee and most drinks

•The Dream Shorts team is Ken who is his personal reminder (Ken's main job is to spam him with texts so he doesn't forget things as he's got a habit of reading texts and not replying) and also comes up with a list of sets for Dream shorts. The builder is a friend and munchymc builder "his talent gets wasted on Dream's shorts but we pay him so"

•His editors are currently Dizzy, Firesale and Mjcr. Willz doesn't edit for him anymore

•The mask animation isn't done but Mask should be released May 21st. He wants to release them together as "the whole song is a double meaning and the whole nuance will be lost without the animation" but no matter if the animation is done the song is getting released on the 21st.

•He and Sapnap eat together often.

•He and Sapnap prefer medium rare Steak

•He wants a home gym it's something he's willing to splurge on. They currently have a weight rack but they haven't even set it up.

•"Eat the rich? Shut up shut up" - Dream

•Talked about money basically saying "Most people don't understand how money works I don't have millions in my bank account it's in assets like merch, land and warehousing for that stuff" (He's not in his landlord arc)

•He's been debating Pride Merch because of Rainbow Capitalism. He doesn't want it too be seen as a money maker and if he does most proceeds would go to charity. He's currently super busy merch wise with Sapnap joining and George in the middle of joining. He did say "Only if the LGBTQ+ community in this community wants it" He thinks he's going to at least change the merch website to a pride one. Sapnap wants to make pride merch including a rainbow flame on his.

•He wants to create a charity that's centered around helping LGBTQ+ one day because he thinks that there's a lack of them. He mentioned that creating a charity was expensive and took a lot and was a complicated process including a board of directors but he wants to do it someday.

•He wanted to buy a bunch of houses in Florida which was a service to house mostly LGBTQ+ youth and people stuck in abusive households for free to get them out of bad home environments. But he didn't because he didn't want people thinking he was profiting of of abuse victims and LGBTQ+ community.

•He said he's terrible with time management and replying to people which is why Ken helps him (and also helps George and Sapnap). He mentioned how Sam messaged multiple times and Dream just forgot to answer but felt bad "I feel like people think I hate them..... Cause I'd be mad if people did that to me"

•He tries to reply to a few texts a day (community number). He also can't do birthday messages everyday because you can only reply at certain times so it's not abusing the system so if you get one it's special. He said he does try but it's got a weird time gap.

•Him and the manhunt winner are trying to come up with a good time to film

•He wants to stream this MCC on twitch and says his team is good.

•He talks about why he's not partnered with Twitch. Basically Twitch has a lock rate (in which you make money) and you legally can't stream on YouTube. So legally if Tommy wanted to stream on YouTube he couldn't. Someone then mentioned how Bad is a twitch partner but still streams on YouTube "Bad streams on YouTube but he has for a while and I don't think that he cares" - Dream

•He likes to reply to every donation he gets on stream and feels bad when he doesn't so he'll turn them off when he streams and wants a platform deal where he can be payed to stream (not twitch). If he gets a streaming partnership he will stream a couple of times a week. He looked in to Facebook but they don't have an alias system meaning you can see everyone's actual Facebook account and personal info, he doesn't like seeing real names on Facebook so it would require a lot of altering if he was to stream there so he's thinking it's probably going to be YouTube.

•He was asked about if his demographic was what he expected and he said he went in with no expectations, he didn't even know what stans were, wasn't really on social media so he wasn't aware of the fan culture. "You guys are a handful sometimes but it's worth it"

•He also mentioned how he and the DreamSMP changed the twitch audience demographic. It used to be male dominated in both streamers and audience and now it's almost split which is unheard on.

•He has 5 fidget spinners in his house. Two in his bedroom. Two in his office. One in the living room.

•He likes his Minecraft skin as he thinks the arm is cook and you never see the rest of his skin really. He says it's unique and different and "me". Dream: You can't even tell half the skins apart on MC.

•He's not lost the motivation to stream. Most of the times if he wants to stream he gets George or Sapnap to do it and he just turns up. It's more beneficial to them as they have donos and subs on. (Don't we fucking know it "can you say hi to")

•He has listened to Lovejoy. Says the ep was great and they're very talented and awesome. Doesn't know what his favourite song is but probably would pick One Day because the chorus slaps.

•RIP to acoustic Roadtrip. He said instead of acoustic Roadtrip we get Mask so no losses today for Dream stans.

•"With Roadtrip I went to Parker and I said Hey I have a story I want to tell through music. I have no experience with that can you help me" He said sure. He crafted the music and melodies and how things are formed where it's catchy. I have less comfort singing that. I love the song and it's my song, it's very representative of me and I'm sure I could sing it but it's a song I'd be kinds of scared to sing live, with Mask I basically did everything. I sat there the entire time and maybe an hour out if the 100 I wasn't in the call. Dream came up with the lyrics and main melody for Mask (First one he's ever come up with) "That was just notes in my fucking voice memos"

•The clip we heard of Mask was a prechorus not the actual chorus. He thinks he'd be more comfortable to do a mask acoustic and it's more melodic than Roadtrip. The chorus also has a lot of instruments similar to Roadtrip. Mask starts of slow and guitar with minimal reverb and is more raw.

• He doesn't want music to be his main thing. It's something fun to do and he's passionate about it as it's a way to express emotions. He wants to release mask then go from there. He wants to release at least one more song but has nothing on his mind currently. His two ideas were Roadtrip and Mask.

•He wouldn't quit his job to become a pizza delivery man.

•His favourite features on himself are eyes or freckles and he also confirmed that he does have eyebrows.

•He was told that Parkour warrior would be bought back some time in the near future and he got excited for it. "Even if I don't win, which I will, it'll be fun"

•Went on about his MCC team but I'm not going to put that in as we should be getting them today. He did say he wasn't on Pink but he did sound confused. (For reference he's always in Pink as it's the last team announced and keeps the hype up by announcing the biggest streamer last)

•Said he and his mum had the Mr Beast burger. He recommends because he likes the avacado. He mentioned how Mr Beast uses "Ghost Kitchens" which is basically where he gives restaurants permission to cook his food so it's restaurant quality food.

•His favourite piece of merch is the circle smile. (The pool photo on Instagram). He said the quality was bad (he worked with a different company and didn't have his own company) and it was elasticy feeling and he's planning on re-releasing it again but with good quality.

•He's started to send merch out in custom packaging. So his bags have the smile and will mostly be green. Sapnap's has the flame and is either black or white. He's also trying to make it so every order has the sticker packs for both him and Sapnap.

•He loves the coins as it's cheaper than a hoodie but still celebrates the milestones and will last a long time. He mentioned how the old coins are getting removed off the site and how if you have any of the coins your special because only a few thousand get made. He's kept around 100 of each coin that he wants to give away in person.

•He wanted to have a cool store where you could access computers that give you access to the DreamSMP in spectator mode. But it's too costly and would require too much time and isn't safe fight now. He doesn't think it'd be worth it financially.

•Most of the hoodie are black instead of multiple colours because of limited supply and covid. Getting the colours are harder because if the pandemic which hopefully won't be an issue soon.

•He wants to do a short meetup tour with Sapnap and George with a few locations in the US (and if others nearby want to join like Quackity or Karl they can). He also wants to visit Australia, UK, Canada, Mexico and Philippines and do something like that there but definitely at least visit with George and Sapnap.

•He's never been to the Philippines but his mum has. He wants to set up a place in the Philippines where he can ship merch in bulk and it would help to reduce shipping. However it would probably be big milestone merch.

•He's not got the vaccine yet but will get it when he needs to. He doesn't leave the house so he doesn't see the point.

•He's the ideas man. George's footcam video was Dream's idea. The T-shirt video was Dream's idea. Most if not all of the Dream Team's videos are Dream's ideas.

•Said he's got a similar/the same hair colour as Froy (Dream buddy at this point the only difference between you and Froy is that one of you is dating Richard Madden /lh)

#dreamsmp #dream smp #dreamwastaken #mcyt #georgenotfound #sapnap

[newtonsheffield]

Hi!! I just wanted to tell you how much I do love your stories and how much I am really into them! I even have pop-up notifications in here and Ao3 to know when you share with us more about Bridgerton and Sons - which seems kinda a stalker, now I think of it... but it's not like that! 😅🤦‍♀️

The thing is, I'm a very musical person; whenever I read or do some computer-required work, or basically anything in my life tbh, music is always present. For instance, I'm re-reading again (can't they just, magically, give us Season 2 already? 🤣) TVWLM and for Anthony and Kate's Wedding night, I cannot help but "listen to" 'Experience', by Ludovico Einaudi; and when reading/imagining the wedding in the Bridgerton and Sons Universe, Anthony and Kate are dancing to 'You & I', by Crystal Fighters (which is so refreshing, good vibes and just PERFECT).

If it's not too much to ask, which kind of music do Kate and Anthony listen to? Which is their favourite genre; would it surprise us all? I don't know why I picture Anthony completely flabbergasted to Kate's musical tastes. 🤣

Thank you in advance and thank YOU for giving us content and such a beautiful story when we're waiting for the season to come. 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

PD.: thank you for not making Penelope be Lady Whistledown in Bridgerton and Sons. Despite I liked that plot in the books, I just cannot imagine in here Penelope saying nasty things about people we know she loves a lot.

Hi! 

(This got a little longer so I’ve put a cut in)

I’m so glad you’re enjoying Bridgerton and sons!  And perhaps it’s ridiculous, but I’m terribly flattered you have notifications turned on for both Ao3 AND this black hole of a tumblr account (makes me very curious how many other’s also have notifications turned on!) Anyway, no, I don’t think you’re stalking me, that’s why the notification system exists! 

I will own to also being a slightly musically inclined person: Fun fact about me, I’m a classically trained saxophonist! And (and this is really going to tell you all JUST how cool a person I truly am) Guys, I was the captain of my High School Jazz band  😂😂I can play guitar, ukulele and Piano to varying degrees of proficiency but I would never in a million years play any of those three instruments in front of another human being! That being said my own taste in music is cripplingly basic as anyone who has dared look at the Bridgerton and Sons playlist on spotify can attest too. It has often been joked by my friends that I cannot start a playlist without putting Fleetwood Mac’s Rumors album on and Shania Twain’s Come on Over album.  But! I love Ludovico Einaudi! His work is always so beautiful and tbh whenever I listen to it I get a little choked up!  and I hadn’t heard You & I before but I can definitely see them dancing to it at their wedding, just being sickeningly in love and happy. We love to see it. 

Also, when I first started writing Insufferable Penelope probably was going to be the writer but... the longer it went on and the crueler the things said got, I decided it just wasn’t right. This isn’t a Gossip Girl situation fam. 

Okay! Kate and Anthony’s favourite Music! 

Kate was a young girl in the mid-late 90′s so unfortunately I think we know what this means: Kate knows the entirety of the Spiceworld album by heart. She could probably do it backwards. She would never admit it to Anthony but she had a Justin Timberlake poster on her wall for a very long time. Anthony does not have the heart to tell her that he knows she love NSYNC because Edwina has showed him a video of their perfectly choreographed routine to Bye Bye Bye. She’s also quite partial to the 80′s rock that played heavily in her house growing up. And Anthony is very surprised to find a Def Leppard shirt amongst her laundry one day. While Anthony may not be partial to Kate’s music, he does think it’s very adorable when she sings along in her endearingly tone deaf way, and so more often than not when they’re cooking together in the kitchen, they’re playing her music.  

Anthony is a soft rock/indy kind of guy. He’s constantly bringing up bands that Kate has never even heard of. She gets tugged along to concert after concert of music that all sounds exactly the same to her but she really doesn’t care because Anthony is there, his arms wrapped tightly around her waist, singing softly in her ear, a huge smile on his face. And he looks so happy, and young, and carefree that her heart nearly bursts for him. 

There is one time when Kate finally recognises a song on Anthony’s playlist about 4 months into their relationship and she squeals a little with delight and amusement when it starts. “Hyacinth is getting awfully good at sneaking songs onto your playlist.” She says, smirking as she starts to hum along, but she can’t help but notice that Anthony hasn’t done anything, didn’t make a disgusted noise, his hand hasn’t even moved from hers to try and change the song, and then she notices his ears going a little red.  “Oh my god!” she says laughing brightly “You, Mr. Music is artistry Katie put this song on here didn’t you?!” And Anthony tuts and puffs his chest a little which only makes her heart burst more for him when he says, more than a little primly  “It reminds me of you.”  And god help her, as soon as they get home Kate takes it upon herself to show him that yes God is a woman      

#bridgerton and sons au #kathony #anthony bridgerton #anthony x kate #kate sheffield #kate sharma #yes #maybe I do love Grande #molly's asks and answers

[bonvoyagenoona]

Hi Roomie,

Back at it with another ask because another important question came up. Can you please settle a dispute?

Which BTS member:

1. Shows up at your work to steal you away for lunch?

2. Shows up at your work and makes YOU lunch?

3. Wants to do either of the above but is too busy, so YOU show up at his work? Which do you do: bring him lunch or make him your lunch?

Ah, Roomie! Perfect timing, as I am now on my lunch break! 🤩 Come join me. I've ordered us some grilled cheeses and tomato soup with our boys on the side.

Q: Which BTS member shows up at your work to steal you away for lunch?

A: Jimin

That whimsical smile pops into frame, blocking out your computer screen. Giggles. Back hugs. "What are you doing here?" He'll tell you that everything was fine, and that he just missed you. You'll stroll down the sidewalk, hand not just in hand, but hands melded, your head resting on his shoulder as he talks about how he likes surprising you at work. That he likes imagining you laughing at your desk and helping out your team. But that you also need to be spoiled. Lunch is on him -- whatever you like. But like you told me, Jimin definitely greases the wheels with snacks, and you're never one to be fooled. When you get home later that evening, he'll be hungry for something else, and more of it.

Q: Which BTS member shows up at your work and makes YOU lunch?

A: Taehyung

Two quick knocks at your office door. Tie already swung over his shoulder. Playful, smirking eyes. "Where's the copy room?" You can't believe Tae borrowed a suit to make it look like he works there. And you can't believe Tae has gone through this pretense just to leave the door open as he eats you out. The thin, plastic paper tray of the copier slightly buckles under your ass as you involuntarily grind, and your feet squirm where they're planted on his shoulders. His thumbs slowly run over your ankles, back and forth, as his tongue swirls around your precious bud dripping and spilling faster than the toner cartridges you'd somehow broken and knocked over in your haste. His grip on your ankles tightens when you let out a whine that rises and falls into a grunt, and again, and again, rhythmic, like the ones coming from the machine below you. You fall flat on your back, shoulders to the ends of your locks dangling down the other side. It's then that Taehyung, knowing that you're spent and need a moment, finally releases you, taking a step back and turning toward the open door, walking up to it and wiping his mouth on Jin's borrowed suit sleeve. You feel so satisfied that you don't even care when you hear him say, "Oh, hey, Debra."

Q: Which BTS member wants to do either of the above but is too busy, so YOU show up at his work? Which do you do: bring him lunch or make him your lunch? A: Namjoon, both

I'm a "porque no los dos?" kinda gal when it comes to your asks, huh Roomie??

At first, I thought this would be Yoongi (again, when am I not thinking about Yoongi?). But Yoongi is organized, and he doesn't skip meals. When Namjoon gets busy, he gets easily distracted, because his thoughts are going a million miles a millisecond. He's also kind of terrible at cooking, or just generally taking care of the base of his Maslow hierarchy. Makes sense. He lives in his head, at the top of that pyramid. So it barely registers when you show up during what is technically lunch. Namjoon's been spending his days preparing for Yoongi's infamous all-nighters, and you've come to make sure he doesn't pass out or die. "Steak??" Namjoon asks with surprise. His eyes widen as they so cutely do when he takes bite after bite, inhaling the meal in just a few. He'll beam at you as you chat to occupy his mind with something light and irreverent for a change, offering him respite, as he so often does for you. But then you realize he's studying you with a gaze as calculated as the one he usually saves for his music. "What?" you'll ask nervously. "You didn't have anything to eat," he'll say, tacking on with an added growl, "And I'm hungry for more." You know something about the top of that pyramid, too. How much he loves creativity, especially spur-of-the-moment. "Then, I've got an idea," you say, prompted by the moment. Who knew 69ing in his studio would be just the thing to quench both your appetites?

More Important Questions

#important questions #bts imagine #bts fanfiction #bts drabble #bts x you #namjoon #jimin #tae #mochilatae #asks #your asks #I CANNOT WITH THIS!! #hope this makes you smile roomie!

[aries-rising-on-an-aquarius-tide]

Evocations: XVI

The Chief District Attorney drafts an over-eager redhead with too much to prove, to replace Alexandra within just a few weeks. Liv allows the natural rhythm of the work to sweep her along, pouring herself into it in order to keep the loneliness and the mourning at bay.

Darcie and Alexander check in regularly enough, even after the sale of the apartment is settled, two months after being on the market. She is genuinely touched that they call, but dreads it, too - being forced to sit in her sadness for that brief period every few weeks.

Elliot checks in too, in his own way. For the first couple months he pretends that he is being subtle about it: asking her if she's eaten, glancing at her fridge every time he stops by her apartment, making sure she is the first to nap in the cribs if they have a lull. As Christmas approached, he suggested drinks or pizza outside of work more often. He made it clear Olivia was welcome to celebrate Christmas with his family.

But Liv didn't want company. She didn't want Christmas. All she wanted was her life back, and if she couldn't have that, she wanted to work. So, she put her head down and plodded forward.

It was late in January when the phone call came. Olivia grabbed the phone on the first ring, assuming it was a case about to break. On the other end of the line, though, was Alexander's voice. Immediately, a chill snaked down Liv's spine. The Cabots never called her at work.

"Olivia," Alex's father said quietly, and the knot of tears in his throat was audible, "we lost Darcie."

Liv went stiff in her wheeled chair, fixing her eyes on a pile of paperwork in front of her. She listened to Alexander's soft voice telling her the basic details, all the while thinking of how he believed he had lost his entire family, when Alex was somewhere still alive.

She assures him she will call when she arranges her flight, and ends the call, walking straight into Cragen's office where she tells him she needs time off.

.

.

Alex has never been so sick of a winter as she is of that first Winter in Wisconsin. She has three layers to strip out of as she comes through the door at the end of the day, and Sky impatiently dances circles as she does so, waiting for her dinner.

Her job now is at an insurance firm. Not selling it, thank God, mostly just auditing and reviewing applications. Like everything else she has undertaken, the job is easy and she excels. Her skills are painfully underused in the position, and she is already exhausted with it by January.

Tina, her 'sister,' continues to see her regularly. Behind closed doors, they are acquaintances at best; any hope of having a close friend in the woman had sailed very early-on. Alex is, in fact, surrounded by acquaintances - in co-workers, at the stores she frequents, in her neighborhood. But nobody gets close.

Close isn't an option any more. Every time she forgets to respond for a beat to 'Emily,' every time she sees someone new, Alex is chilled through, wondering if she has been found out. She worries about people asking the wrong questions, about strangers who look at her a moment too long.

Is this the day? she has asked herself a thousand times, Is today the day I die?

In the bathroom mirror, she runs her fingers over the scar from her bullet wound, and tries to convince her reflection that she is Emily now. She practices it like daily affirmations, trying to accept her isolation, her loneliness, her confusion.

Once Sky is fed, Alex reheats some chicken soup for herself (she has refused to cook anything but hot meals since the first snowfall), and takes it to the spot where she has set up her desk and PC. She has gotten into the habit of keeping up with the news in New York, and in Dallas where her parents are; in her email are dozens of newspaper subscriptions she uses to keep on top of SVU cases and other tidbits.

A foot rubs Sky absently under the desk as Alex eats her soup and reads. Outside the doors to her back patio, the snow swirls and flutters with no end in sight to the frozen dairyland's stasis. This is when she sees it.

It rolls up on the screen of her digital copy of The Dallas Morning News:

Beloved Wife of Prominent Local Attorney Passes, Community Mourns

Below it, she reads her parents' names . . . her own name, words that she knows are a part of her real life, but at first she can't make them feel real. Again and again, she reads the blurb about the death of her mother, and the recent death of herself.

My mother is dead.

Mom has died.

Alex repeats the fact, continues to paraphrase it, until she rises from the computer and walks back to the kitchen with her half-eaten soup. Laying the bowl in the sink, she stares blankly into the receptacle until she feels the burn of her fingernails cutting into her palm.

When she looks up from her bleeding hands, her eyes land on the telephone, and she briefly considers calling Jack Hammond and demanding that he give her back her old life. To attend her mother's funeral, to be held by Olivia, to feel something again.

In the end, Alex takes Sky to bed under a thick pile of blankets, and her sleep is filled with nightmares where snow falls in Dallas, and she wanders the streets, screaming for her mother, who cannot hear her call.

.

.

Olivia has never been to Texas, and cannot think of a worse reason for her first trip there as she touches down in Dallas and embraces Alexander Cabot, who seems diminished without the two blondes who have always bookended him.

She moves into mothering mode quickly, encouraging Al to eat and sleep. She keeps a wary eye on his drinking, and makes sure that he is working through any paperwork Darcie left behind. As parents most often do, the Cabots had originally arranged to leave everything to Alexandra. After the cartel case, some reshuffling had occured, and Olivia is touched and conflicted when she finds out that some of it was shuffled to her.

When he falls into a fitful sleep the night before the funeral, Olivia slips silently, curiously into Alex's teenage bedroom. It is mostly intact: the walls showcase 80s movie posters alongside Feminist icons and clippings of political milestones of the decade.

Liv breathes deep of the ghost of her lover in the space, fingers reverently gliding over academic awards and dusty photos where Alex's smile beams out at her. On the bookshelf, she reads titles one after the other - Rubyfruit Jungle nestled right up next to Little Women . . . Jane Rule, Roald Dahl, Beckett, a gathering of strange bedfellows that brings a wisp of a grin to Olivia's face.

Finally she sits down on the narrow, creaking bed and picks up the tattered stuffed penguin at the pillow. The sigh that pitches from her is swollen with melancholy.

"His name is Shivers," Al tells her from the doorway, and Liv jumps at the sound. He fills the doorframe with his height and heavy sense of his grief.

"Of course it is," Liv sniffs with amusement, giving the flightless bird another once-over.

"You should have him," Alexander furthers.

The amount of restraint that Olivia has to employ to keep from confessing that the man's daughter is still alive is utterly monumental in that moment. She binds it, snuffs it, locks it away again and again. No confession comes, just a smile for Alex's father, and a nod.

The morning following the funeral, Liv flies out of Dallas with Shivers in her suitcase, leaving behind her a dozen yellow roses on Darcie's grave.

.

.

In mid-April in Wittenberg, much to Alexandra's dismay, the ground remains frozen. Most of the snow slowly melts, however every now and then, a light dusting of fresh flakes comes down in the morning or overnight, then melts with the climb of the sun.

She has lost weight through the winter months, and the sharp planes of her face in the mirror are painful to acknowledge. No proper mourning of her mother had come to pass; Alex had simply filed the knowledge away as a part of the life she lost, and continued the monotonous plod forward in the strange play she now acted in each day.

Before April gave way to the slightly warmer thaw of May, the insurance firm where she was working threw a social mixer - to break up the long change of seasons, they explained. Tina, who was concerned about Alex's weight loss and isolation, had pushed hard for her to attend, even if it was just to get out of the house for something other than work and errands.

So, on the evening of the mixer, Alexandra found herself at a local drink lounge called Doubles, quietly sipping a Shirley Temple. Her co workers were made up mostly of the usual office-job types: clad in off-the-rack suits, soft-spoken and nerdy, often shy, and unfortunately not very interesting. Alex stayed hugged to the bar, drinking and trying to decide how long she had to stay in order for her escape to be considered polite rather than asocial.

"Mind if I join you?"

The man that belonged to the voice was from the Claims Adjustment department of the firm. Alex had seen him around now and then, perhaps even passed polite words with him - but she couldn't recall his name. She waved her hand in the direction of the stool next to her in reply, and he settled in.

"You don't remember me, do you?" he chuckled, watching for the bar tender to free up so he could order a drink.

"I'm not so great with names," Alex told him apologetically.

"Well, I remember your name - Emily." He had a great smile, and he flashed it at her. "Mine is Greg."

"Thanks for reminding me."

He called to the bartender for a rum and coke, then checked if she wanted a refill, which she declined. "Where were you before Wittenberg?" he asked.

"Tulsa, Oklahoma," Alex told him, pulling from the pool of lies and backstory that she had been taught in October.

"Ah," his green eyes twinkled with amusement, "That explains it then."

"Explains what?"

"Why you seem to disdain Wisconsin winter so much."

"I didn't realize it was so obvious," Alex smirked.

He laughed, wrapping both hands around his highball glass. "Were you in insurance there?"

"No. No, this has been a big change for me," she admitted softly.

"Do you miss it?"

Alex startled. "Oklahoma?"

"Whatever it is you left behind."

The blonde paused, her blue eyes locked on the liquor in her glass. "Yes," she confessed, "I do."

They stayed at the bar, drinking slowly, while Greg asked her innocuous questions that were neither boring nor bothersome. Alexandra could feel herself relaxing, loosing herself from the lonely exile she had been prescribed. Before the evening was over, she even caught herself smiling at him, wanting to laugh at his simple jokes.

When the event began to empty out, she declined his offer for a ride home, and was genuinely surprised when he accepted it without pushing back. Neither did he ask her for her number, or to see him again. Alex wondered on her taxi ride home if perhaps she had misinterpreted a man's intentions for the first time since adolescence.

Her worry was quashed, however, when Greg reappeared at the office beginning of the week, and asked her if she would like to have lunch together. She agreed, and it slowly became a regular thing.

By the time he finally asked her on what could be considered an actual date, Alexandra was anxious at the idea of going back to being alone.

She considered the long winter, in which she hadn't put up a tree or celebrated the holidays. Considered the death of her mother, and the nightmares that had followed, leaving her breathless and shaking. Alex even considered the ring, somewhere back in New York, that might never find its way onto the finger of the love she had been forced to abandon.

Facing down the idea of that isolation for the rest of her life was too much to bear.

Alex said yes.

#law and order svu #svu #olivia benson #alexandra cabot #alex cabot #olivia x alex #cabenson #evocations #hearteyes4mariska #my writing #fanfiction #my fanfic

[rikumorimachisgirl]

Bridges

Pairing: Dr. Toshiki Kasumi x OC (Anna)

Fandom: Voltage, RomanceMD

Genre: Fluff and a little angst

Word count: 2,945

Disclaimer: I do not own Voltage or any of its characters, but I own the idea of this fic. Also, CG borrowed from Voltage.

A/N: I wrote this for my good friend @imoonlit-river as a Valentine's Day present. I hope you enjoy this.

It started one afternoon. One terrible afternoon, just after you'd clocked out of a long and grueling shift at the Seimei University Hospital. You sighed. You were used to long shifts, but covering two shifts on your first week on the job was one for the books. 

You squinted as you stepped out of the main entrance, the afternoon sunlight shone directly at you. As you trudged to your apartment, you mentally deliberated if taking this temporary assignment was a mistake. Lost in thought, you allowed your feet to carry you through the busy crowd. 

'Maybe I should've just stayed home,' you thought silently. It has only been a week since you started, but you have been passed on from one IT department to another, told off twice for misunderstanding instructions,  had no one else on the same shift as you, and no one to talk to. 

You stopped on your tracks and found yourself on a bridge - the same one you pass every single day on your way to work and back. The vivid hues of the sky caught your attention, and you gasped as you admired the pretty pink palette in front of you. Leaning at the railing, you stared at the horizon, drinking in its beauty, and allowing it to refresh your tired soul. 

"Long day?"

A voice beside you made you jump. You hadn't expected anyone to be there - more so, notice you standing there. As you shifted your gaze to the person next to you, you felt your eyes widen in surprise. 

"Did I guess right then?"

Your heart hammered in your chest, as the beautiful man standing beside you continued to speak. You shook your head and blinked your eyes a few times to make sure you weren't dreaming. You haven't slept in twenty-four hours, you reminded yourself. Maybe this was all a dream. 

Yes, it must be a dream. There was no way that the Seimei University Hospital's Chief of Medicine, and top Cardiologist, Toshiki Kasumi, was beside you looking so cool in his grey hoodie under a crisp blue jacket, and jeans. 

"Uh, are you okay?" 

"C-c-chief Kasumi!" You blurted out louder than you had intended when you saw his face coming nearer to check on you. "It's you! You're here!"

"Yes, I have been for several minutes now, but you seem to have noticed just now. Are you feeling okay?." He raised his eyebrows to study you, before leaning back. 

"I'm sorry, Chief Kasumi," you bowed a lot lower than necessary. "I worked two shifts today to cover for Sena-san. I didn't mean to be out-of-sorts today."

He looked at you quietly before turning his attention to the view in front of you. 

"It's fancy seeing you here, Chief Kasumi. Do you cross this bridge, too?" You asked awkwardly. 

The silence between you stretched for a few minutes, and you suddenly wished you hadn't asked him a silly question. You kept your gaze low, looking around for a hole you can crawl into and hide. 

"Bridges aren't for crossing," he finally spoke, as he tucked his hands in his pocket, and you looked up to see the pink hues had turned purple. "They're for stopping."

"Stopping?"

He simply nodded. "Who knows, maybe we'll stop by the same spot again sometime," he said, and just before he turned to leave, he added, "but only if you stop calling me Chief Kasumi."

***

"You know, you haven't introduced yourself to me properly."

You glanced sideways to see him looking at the same blessed view you admired with him four weeks back. Today was an uneventful Wednesday and you managed to clock out on time. 

"Oh, I haven't? I'm sorry. My name is Anna," you replied, smiling. 

"And you're here on a temporary assignment?" He asked as he handed you one of the cans of coffee he bought from the vending machine just before. 

"For four more months, yes," you said cheerily.

"I see. What's it been like for you so far?"

"The first week was hell," you recalled, sighing. "But lately, Sena-san has been a lot nicer to me. I now have two other teammates on the same shift, so the workload is more manageable. They're also teaching me the ropes so I don't get in trouble."

He simply nodded, keeping his gaze towards the sky, while you secretly stole glances at his picture-perfect profile. Until now, you still couldn't believe you've managed not only to talk to but also to 'hang out' with Seimei University Hospital's most sought-after doctor.

Him. The guy beside you. Cardio surgery's rockstar, EICU's fearless department head - the guy loved and loathed by many because of his top-notch skills and his dazzlingly good looks. Your teammates told you that the most difficult cases always get sent his way, and big shots always requested for him to attend to them. You've seen him in action a few times in the hospital, too, and his intense energy was nothing like the soothing aura he exuded now 

"If you have something to say, speak up," he said, snapping you out of your reverie, and you blushed. Just how long has he noticed you staring at him, you wondered, slightly mortified. As the sky turned a darker shade of purple, he cleared his throat and looked your way. "Anyway, I have to go back to the hospital. Are you on your way home?"

"Yes," you managed to reply as he turned to leave. "I hope to cross this bridge and see you here again sometime."

He paused for a moment and turned around. "Bridges aren't for crossing, you know. Did I ever tell you that?"

"Oh. Yes, you did," you suddenly remembered, as your face turned redder. "Well, maybe we can stop by again another time."

"Maybe we will, Anna."

Maybe it was the way he stopped on his tracks to remind you about what he said about bridges or the casual way he called your name that kept rooted on the spot to watch his figure disappear into the crowd, with an unopened can of coffee in hand, and a goofy smile on your face. 

***

"I'm glad you were able to restore the files in Kyogoku's computer the other day."

The two of you stood side-by-side at the bridge once again, looking at the pink sky. You had met quite a few times in between, but today, you decided to linger a while longer so you could talk a little bit more. 

"It wasn't that hard. All I did was search the servers for the backup of his data. No biggie," you shrugged, as you handed him the sandwich you bought at the convenience store for him while he opened your can of warm coffee for you. 

You don't know when this whole thing started, and neither of you seemed to have taken notice, but somewhere between the first time you've met and today, you've made up so many unspoken rules with each other. Rules such as who's turn it is to buy snacks, or which topics are safe to discuss with each other. 

But today, you were feeling more daring than usual, so you stared at him again as he was appreciating the beauty of the sky before him. 

"You've got something to say?" He finally asked. 

"You must love the sky so much, no?" 

"I like this one in particular," he said coolly. "This particular view is called the Belt of Venus."

"Belt of Venus…," you mouthed. 

"It only lasts for about 15 minutes before the sky turns dark. It's associated with the Greek goddess, of course, and it signifies…" he said before catching himself. 

"It signifies what, Dr. Kasumi?" You asked curiously. 

He took a deep breath and shook his head. "It signifies a lot of different things to different people."

"What does that signify to you though?" You press earnestly. 

"A passing," he said quietly. 

Something in his voice pulled at your heartstrings and as you gazed into his grey eyes, you knew there was more to the man beside you than he let on. 

Before you could press any further, he moved his hand to tuck a lock of your hair behind your ear and you froze on the spot. He felt you tense up and smiled. 

"I have to go back to the hospital, Anna. Take care on your way home, alright?" 

All you could do was nod at him as he smiled tenderly and went on his way, leaving behind his uneaten sandwich and your half-finished can of coffee. 

He didn't promise you'd stop by together again soon, but something in you knew you would. Soon. 

***

"I can't believe the time's flown by so fast!"

You threw your hands in the air excitedly and looked to the sky with a big smile on your face. You're only a month away from ending your assignment in Tokyo, and you couldn't be happier. 

He stood beside you, armed with a paper bag filled with sandwiches and chips, and your favorite can of coffee. He smiled silently as you beamed like a child who has just been allowed to go outside and play. It was sunset again, and his calendar was surprisingly clear, so he texted you to ask if you wanted to meet. It was, of course, an offer you'd never say no to. 

"Someone's happy," he said as he leaned by the railing, once again staring at the sky. 

"Well, duh. Of course, I'm happy. I miss home," you replied, finally settling in beside him. "I can't wait to eat home-cooked meals once again, and talking to people who speak the same Language - no offense meant!"

He snickered softly as you leaned on him, your arm against his while admiring the view in front of you. With you, he seemed less like the dark emperor of the lord of death his colleagues made him out to be - he was simply Dr. Kasumi, a guy who loved the sunset and who loved to listen to your endless - often nonsensical - stories, and humor you with his own. 

As you fell into silence, you began to wonder what your days would be like when you went back home. Days without Dr. Kasumi. 

Your heart began to hurt at the thought that in a few more weeks, you would have to say goodbye - to put an end to the sunset stops along the bridge to watch this beautiful view, bid farewell to the conversations you've exchanged over convenience store snacks sometimes until late into the night, and say goodbye to the kindest soul you've never even had the chance to know deeper. The thought made you freeze. What's wrong with me?

"Are you okay?" He asked, peering into your face, as you stared listlessly into space. 

"That was what you first asked me," you replied, recovering quickly. He smiled. 

"Yes, it was," he chuckled, facing you. "Back then, I knew exactly what was going on in your little head after Sena asked you to work overnight."

"And now?"

He sighed. "And now, I'm not sure if your reason is the same as mine," he said, as he backed you up against the railing and trapped you in his arms. "You wanted to know what the Belt of Venus meant to me, right?"

You nodded nervously. 

"My dad died when I was little, and my mom always said you could send off your departed loved ones when the goddess appeared. I watched it every day since," he said quietly, his eyes never leaving yours. "And when my mom and my best friend died, I watched the sunset even more. The Belt of Venus means to send someone off - at least that's what it means to me. And I always felt sad when it's over. At least I did until lately…"

"What changed?" You asked, waiting on his answer with bated breath. 

"You. You happened," he replied, leaning closer to you until your lips touched his. "You came and saw the sunset with me. And for a time, I forgot to be scared. But now, I need to send you off."

"Dr. Kasumi -," you gasped, as he pulled away from you and straightened up. 

"I'm sorry to burden you, confessing as I did," he said, as he reached out to wipe the tears you hadn't realized had stained your face. "Please think nothing of it. I want you to go home and be happy - as happy as you made me in these four months we've watched the sunset together."

He sighed, releasing you from his grip. "And for your sake, I won't stop by anymore. But don't be a stranger when you see me at work."

His image was a blur behind your tears, as he walked away from you, just as he's always done whenever you watched the sunset. Only this time, you had a feeling he was never coming back. 

You scolded yourself right there and then. He was just a friendly face, someone who wanted you to feel you weren't alone in this strange place, you reasoned out. You aren't even supposed to cry over him. 

But as the night grew darker, the realization of your feelings for him came into light. 

You loved him. You were in love with Dr. Kasumi. And you needed to see him one more time. 

***

The days leading to your departure went by like a blur, and in the flurry of it all, you had not caught sight of the dark-haired doctor that stole your heart. You passed by his office but were often told he was in surgery or teaching at a conference somewhere. He never stopped by your usual bridge, too. 

This isn't fair at all, you thought angrily. How come he gets to confess his feelings and you don't? 

Today was your last day at the Seimei University Hospital, and you've made arrangements to stay two more days in Tokyo before flying back home. 

This was it, you thought. Your last chance to confront the elusive heart thief they call Chief of Medicine at the EICU. As you peered into the exclusive department, a grumpy looking Orthopedic surgeon looked your way and sighed. 

"He ain't here," Dr. Takado said, exasperated. Not that you blame him - he's been in the receiving end of all your inquiries after all. 

"I see. Well, thank you, Dr. Takado," you said, bowing politely, much to his surprise.

"Why do you want to see him so badly anyway?" 

"It's my last day at work today," you explained, trying your best not to melt under his icy glare. "I- I only wanted to thank him for making me feel like I wasn't a stranger around here."

Something in Dr. Takado's eyes flickered, and his lips stretched into a lazy smile. "Is that so?" He said. "I may be able to help you then, but you gotta tell me something first, got it?"

Relief washed over you as you realized you may have gained an ally in his squad. Smiling, you looked at the kind-hearted doctor in front of you and said, "I'm at your mercy, Dr. Takado."

***

The lovely pink hue tinged the afternoon sky once again, signaling that the day was about to come to a close. Filled with determination, you sprinted towards the bridge at the far end of the river bank. Standing there, just as Dr. Takado promised, was Dr. Kasumi, in casual clothes - the same one he wore when you first met. He stared quietly at the Belt of Venus, his expression solemn, as though he were sending someone off in prayer. 

You paused to catch your breath and to calm your beating heart. You wanted nothing more but to run over to him and tell him off, but that wouldn't do you any good, and you knew it. 

"Fancy seeing you here," you said, feigning nonchalance. 

"Anna?"

"You look like you've just seen a ghost." You walked closer until you stood right in front of him. "What's wrong with our old bridge?"

He looked at you with a scowl on his face. "I said I wasn't stopping by there anymore, didn't I?" 

"You also said I shouldn't be a stranger if I saw you at work, but you never showed yourself to me," you retorted. "Don't you think it's cruel to confess your feelings to me and not hear me confess back?"

"What's the point if you're just crossing  -," he asked, turning his gaze back to the Belt of Venus as it was starting to disappear. 

"Well, what if I said I wasn't crossing anymore?"

He paused and held his breath. And you took it as an opportunity to approach him. Cradling his face in your hands, you forced him to look at you. 

"I don't want to just cross the bridge anymore, Dr. Kasumi," you said earnestly, as you gazed into his eyes. "I want to stop. With you."

His breath hitched, but at the same time, you felt his arms around you holding you close. "Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"I thought it was your last day…"

"Someone may have worked some magic to make me miraculously extend my stay," you respond cryptically, as you returned his hug. 

"So, you mean it - you're not going away."

"I said it before and I'll say it again - I won't. I'm staying," you said, pulling away from his hug so you can look at him. "And depending on how this works out, maybe I'll be staying for the long run."

He smiled and touched your cheeks. "Oh, you'll be happy here alright. I'll make sure of it. This is the only place you're stopping - right by my side."

The end. 

#dr kasumi x oc #toshiki kasumi #kasumi toshiki #dr kasumi #kasumi x reader #kasumi x oc #kasumi fanfic #romance md: always on call #rmd: always on call #rmd fanfic #iris writes

[jeagerism]

wish you were here

✒ word count : 4.2k

✒ characters : park jimin x reader

✒ warnings : sadness, like hella sadness im sorry, break up!au, reader just misses him lots, small amounts of fluff, cursing, seeing the person you love with someone new, first dates, moving on, crying

✒ summary : You're sitting in your bathtub eating marshmallows at 3 in the morning three weeks after the break up, and you're doing fine, you really are. But then, all of a sudden, you're crying and realising how much you miss him.

✒ author's note : as i wrote more and more i was like...hmmm. jimin. here is the completed fic im scared to post this didusissj but if i don't i might die so. hope u guys like dis one xoxo it's my first jimin imagine pls do not hurt me im trying :o

It's 6 p.m. on a Saturday when it happens.

The curtains are open slightly in the living room, rays of golden sunlight reaching just past where your feet rest on the couch. You're typing up an essay when Jimin slips through the door, toeing his shoes off. Five-fifty, just like clockwork. The coat he wears everyday goes on the same hook - third from the left. He shuffles over to the couch and presses his lips to the crown of your head, just like always.

It's easy to fall into routine.

Another episode of Sex Education plays in the background, long forgotten after an hour of staring at the same screen. You're pretty sure your brain is fried. But you'd made a promise to yourself that you'd finish this essay today, so you make due. 

"Hey." The way your lips stretch into a smile is hard to control, even more so when he copies your actions. He falls onto the couch beside you, leaning into the cushions with a hum. He smells like the strawberries and honey body wash in the bathroom.

You let your eyes study him for a few seconds, then go back to typing, and it's quiet, just like always. It feels normal. Nothing's different. 

Until it is.

"I think we should break up."

Of the five years you've known Jimin, you've been through a lot. And while most of it had been dealing with things much bigger than yourselves, bigger than romance and first kisses, you'd had your fair share of relationship issues.

But things were good. He would come home every day, smiling, press that same kiss to your forehead. Sit right beside you, leaning into your side, his warmth seeping into you. Sometimes he'd play with your fingers, a thing that kept him occupied and calm. You knew Jimin, you knew all his habits, what made him tick, how he acted when he was sad, or happy, or angry.

"Y/N?"

"I can't", you breathe out, so softly it's barely audible. And you wonder if he can even hear you. If he can hear the way you're trying to gather up everything you're feeling right now and trying to shove it down, down, down. "I don't understand? I need, can you-" 

And as much as you know Jimin, he knows you all the same. He knows you're panicking, and normally, he'd grab your hands and help you breathe. In for three, out for three. In for three out for three. He doesn't do that this time. He doesn't even look at you.

"I'm just not...happy. I'm not happy and I don't think I make you happy anymore, either."

But you do. He does, Jimin makes you so happy that sometimes you forget how to breathe. He makes you so happy that you love everything about him, even the things that drive you insane sometimes. So happy that you pick up the clothes he leaves on the floor after his shower, or place his shoes back neatly, or cook his favorite food for him whenever he asks.

These are the things you want to tell him. You want to tell him it all and more, but the only thing that comes out is :

"Okay."

Because what else can you say? He's just said that he's not happy with you anymore, and he's so close but farther away than ever, and he's not even looking at you.

In for three, out for three. But you still can't breathe. And this time, as his words fall on near deaf ears - something about "my stuff" and "sometime later" and "you stay, I'll go" - and he slips his shoes and coat back on, and it's quiet, it's not because you're happy.

You can't breathe because it hurts. You're not sure of how long you stay on the couch, computer running hot on your lap, a "Are you still watching" message on the tv. But when you finally look up, it's dark. 

And you take a breath. Dragging yourself to Jimin and your bedroom - your bedroom - takes more of an effort than you'll admit, but you get there. The pillow is cool against your burning cheek. You allow your eyes to close tight, because his side of the bed is never this cold.

All you can do is breathe. In for three, out for three. Something you'd learned from him, with him. 

It's all you can do to keep yourself from breaking.

He takes you on your first date in September.

It's bowling, which is a stereotypical first date, but it's him, so you don't really mind. 

Park Jimin is nervous. It's evident in the way he wipes his hands on his pants before he holds your hand. The way he gets quiet after laughing at one of your jokes, as if he's afraid of being too loud or happy.

"No fair!", you call, speaking through a pout. "You've got like, superhuman abilities or something. You're obviously gonna win." Crossing your arms, you shake your head. "I think we should label this as cheating."

Jimin chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm not trying, though." 

You make a noise of protest. "That's even worse!" Leaning closer to him, a furrow in your eyebrows, you huff. "Are you saying I'm just plain ole bad at bowling, Park?"

"You said it, not me." It's the first joke he's made all night. You laugh, eyes closing just from the force. "I could, uh, I could help you? If you want. Since I'm so good and everything." The last part is said teasingly, and you can hear the smirk in his voice.

You stand, ruffling his hair with a smile. "Teach me then." By the time you've grabbed the ball you've been using the entire time, he's right behind you. Sticking your fingers in the holes, you twist it around lightly. 

"I see why you're so bad now." You turn, opening your mouth to defend yourself. "You're not even holding the ball right, you know."

"Well, I'm sorry I was never taught bowling ball holding basics. I didn't even know you could hold one of these-"

He interrupts you with a hand on your waist, delicate and soft. His fingers rest just above the top of your jeans, brushing against soft skin. "Like this", he murmurs. Jimin's other hand adjusts your own. "And then this." He keeps his hand atop yours, and brings your arm back, helping you swing it forward. You're so focused on how close he is that you don't notice you still need to let go of the ball.

Lips brushing against the side of your cheek, Jimin hums. You shiver. "You know, this doesn't actually work unless you let go of the ball when you swing, pretty girl." 

You feel like you're going to combust. Park Jimin just called you pretty. Park Jimin, the boy you've had a crush on for months. Called you pretty. Blinking, you swing your arm back with him again, and let it go when it comes forward. Not caring if the ball hits the pins or not, you rotate, until you're face to face with him. All soft, silky hair and lips that look as soft as pillows. 

"What?" He raises an eyebrow, another pretty flush spreading over his cheeks. 

"Can I kiss you?"

The noise that comes from him mirrors the shock on his face that quickly morphs into timidness. "Like you even have to ask, Y/N." 

His lips feel even softer than they look. You've had a first kiss before, but this is the only one that's felt right. Something in you tells you that means something. When you pull away, you're smiling, breathless.

"Hey", Jimin whispers, nodding his head behind you. "You knocked down all the pins."

As he walks you home, he holds your hand.

"I'm glad we got to do this", Jimin says, and his eyes don't meet your own until you squeeze his hand tight. You think about how he'd wrapped you up in the extra sweater he'd been wearing when he'd noticed you were cold. How he'd pulled you closer when walking down the sidewalk because people were bumping into you, and had held you that way the entire way back.

"Me too." You grin, watching the pink on his cheeks spread to his ears and down his neck. His smile mirrors yours regardless. 

Jimin sighs. "I'm, um, sorry if it was lame. I know bowling is kinda...well, kinda bland for a first date-"

"It was perfect." You let your fingers detangle as you back up. "Best first date I've ever had." 

His cheeks swell with a big, boyish grin. "Next time I'll take you to the arcade downtown." A smirk. "Maybe that time you can beat me in something."

You always thought that if Jimin ever left you, you'd cry.

Not that you thought of it often, but it still came up once or twice. Every time it did, he was always right there, with soothing words and soft lips pressed against the tip of your nose. 

So, the fact that you don't cry surprises you.

You don't cry, and a part of you thinks that, if you did, it would never stop. 

Your sadness turns into anger at every reminder of him around your apartment. There's traces of him everywhere, a forced memory no matter where you step. So you keep breathing. You take a breath. 

You take a breath when you see his lunchbox he took to work with him every day. When you visit your friends and they ask how plans for the yearly Halloween party you'd always throw with him are going. When you see a news article about him and the boy's album release. You breathe.

Because you are angry with him. Angry for making you waste your time, making you think that it was you and him. That he still loved you, and that you knew him.

Going back in your head, everything had seemed fine. The two of you hardly fought, you told each other I love you every morning and every night. You still had your weekly movie nights every Friday. You laughed together. 

Nothing had changed, right? You knew him, right?

A week after he's been gone, it hits you that you never knew him that well at all.

You didn't even know him well enough to tell that he was falling out of love with you.

Two weeks after the breakup, and you no longer feel angry. You feel the dragging feeling of sadness creep up on you again. The anger probably would've stayed, but he'd come to get his stuff earlier in the week. 

He forgets a few things, but you don't say anything. Why don't you say anything?

Getting used to life without him is a process. You forget that you don't have to buy those off brand crackers he likes. You never wake up in the morning to his humming in the shower. Things...change.

The bed was never this big, was it? It always seemed small, small enough that the two of you always crowded together, legs tangled together, arms around waists.

Now, it's massive. You pull the blanket up to your chin, and even though you probably shouldn't, you press your cheek into his pillow. 

When you fall asleep, you dream of him.

His skin is bathed in moonlight, pale and soft. The two of you sit in the big clawfoot bathtub, the one you both loved, empty and fully clothed. He's quiet, and anyone else would think that's because it's nearing three in the morning, but you know him. You recognize the subtle shaking of his hands, the sweat beading at his hairline even though it was freezing inside the apartment, the way he taps his fingers together in rhythm.

You know him.

"Hey." It's the first word spoken since you'd sat down. He's facing you, curls going every which way from attempting to sleep earlier. Holding up the bag you'd snagged before you'd followed him in here, you grin. "Want some marshmallows?"

Jimin's lips twitch into a smile, and even though it disappears as quickly as it came, it's something. Massive hand plunging into the bag, he grabs a handful and proceeds to shove a few in his mouth. You settle for popping them in one by one; the small, colorful bits melt on your tongue. 

The bag empties faster than expected, so soon you have nothing to occupy yourselves. As you start to suggest opening the other bag in the pantry, he speaks.

"It's happening again", his shoulders rise up to his ears. His hands rest in between his knees, tangled together, fidgeting.

With a heavy sigh, you lay a hand across his own. "I know." Jimin's eyes meet yours, honey colored and exhausted. The bags under his eyes are more prominent than they have been, and although it's not as bad as the last few times, it's still bad.

"I don't want it to happen again."

And well, you don't quite know what to say to that. Because you don't either. This feeling was always with him, always simmering underneath the surface. It never completely disappeared, but it did get easier to deal with. It was bearable, almost nonexistent at times.

You know it hurts him, and him hurting makes you hurt. He deserves so much good, he is too good, to have so much weight on his shoulders. To be plagued with so much anxiety and pain, and for what? You don't even know the answer.

No one is perfect, as living with him for this many years often reminds you. He's definitely not. He leaves his shoes in the middle of the floor. He forgets to replace the tissue when the roll runs out. He's never had a plant that's lasted more than a week, because he's either not here or just forgets. 

So no, he's not perfect. But you know damn well he's the closest thing to it you have.

"I'll be here." You swallow, fingers slotting in between his. "I am here. No matter what, rain or shine, you know that." Jimin lifts the side of his lips into a smile. "I love you."

Switching in his spot, he turns, leaning back against your chest, rejoining your hands soon after. "I know." He brushes his lips across your knuckles. "I love you, too."

Your other hand combs through his hair, twirling curls around your fingers like thread.

The two of you don't retire to your bed until the sun begins to peak over the horizon.

You wake up with sweat beading at your hairline.

In for three, out for three.

You ignore the phantom taste of marshmallows on your tongue. A shaky hand pushes the blankets off of your body, and you're taking the familiar path to the kitchen before you can really think. There's a bag of mini marshmallows where they always are. You grab them, tearing a whole in the top as you walk towards the bathroom. 

When your back meets the familiar chill of the tub, you can feel the way your throat begins closing up. But you push it away with a hand full of marshmallows, which distracts you from the aching burn settled deep in your chest.

You've never done this alone. Every time you've sat in this exact same position, marshmallows in hand, he's been here. But there's always time for change. At least that's what you tell yourself.

You'd spent all your time in this tub with Jimin. There weren't any more of those times. No more late night baths where you just talked about your days. No more pic nics on the living room floor when you didn't feel like going out. No more hugs or I love you's or simply just seeing him across the room. 

And another. In for three, out for three. Focus on something else. Anything else but him. Your eyes switch from the wall to the bottle of soap on the ledge of the tub. Strawberries and honey. His favorite. Something else. The two towels hanging on the rack, one yellow and one red. You remember picking them out the night you moved in. It's getting harder to see with the tears in your eyes, but it's fine. It's fine.

Because you don't miss him. You can't, because the smell of strawberries and honey are fading from the pillow that's beside yours. The red towel hasn't been used in a month. There's never a box of off-brand crackers with his name on them in the cabinet anymore. And he's not here.

And you can't wish that he is. 

September is different this time.

The streets are full of people, and you're filled with a happy sort of warmth as you wait outside of a coffee shop. Rubbing your hands together, you blow warm air on them to rid yourself of the numbness starting to creep in. It's the type of cold that sets in slowly. You nudge your nose against the scarf you're wearing with a shiver.

People around you pass by with smiles, arms full of bags or holding others hands. It's peaceful.

"You're going to drop them!"

Glancing up, your eyes dart around until they find the source of the noise. There's a part of you that wishes you hadn't. A part of you that wants to shove your nose back into the fabric around your neck. 

Seeing Park Jimin is...weird.

There's a certain type of irony in the way that you see him during your first September without him. It twists and tears at you with bleeding fists.

"Jimin, let me carry some!"

The girl next to him is pretty. She's more than pretty. Jealousy ebbs in your chest for a mere moment at the smile he gives her, the way his eyes sparkle. Remembering how he used to look at you like that pours salt onto the wound. 

His hair is blond now. He looks good. Jimin had always looked good, though. There's no doubt in your mind that he's one of the prettiest people you've ever met. But he looks good. He looks like he's glowing. He looks...happy.

I'm just not...happy anymore.

"I've got it", he laughs, leaning his head back with a smile. Turning, he regains his grip on the bags, switching his gaze over, over, over. "See, like…" His eyes are sparkling. He looks happy. Is this what he meant?

I'm not happy and I don't think I make you happy anymore, either.

"Y/N?"

You quickly avert your eyes, turning and stuffing your hands into your pockets with a huff of breath you can see in the cold air. For a second, you can hear his footsteps getting closer. Of all the ways you thought you'd bump into him, it was safe to say this wasn't on the list. Seeing him wasn't on the list at all. Avoiding the problem until it went away seemed like a good enough plan.

Just as you're ready to turn around and face him, even if you really do not want to, a hand lands on your shoulder. Gentle.

The endless run on thoughts of what you're going to say become muddled as you open your eyes. 

"Sorry it took so long. Since someone wanted peppermint hot chocolate, even though they were obviously going to be running out, I had to wait a little longer." The corner of his lips lift into a grin. "Didn't mind though. Anything for you, I suppose." 

You shake your head with a smile as he hands you the cup. "Thank you." The drink warms your hands, the numbness melting away. 

"Ready to go?"

Jimin's behind you. Jimin is behind you with a girl who may not even be his girlfriend, but a girl who makes him happy. Makes him smile. 

And you think you're a little okay with it. 

You don't really have a choice, but. It's easier to swallow than you'd expected. 

You've learned to live without him. And even though there's a piece of you screaming and throwing a fit like a child that just wants and wants, you don't break. 

"Yeah. I am."

Pivoting, you walk forward. He's still relatively far away, but close enough that you can see him in your peripheral vision. Close enough that you make eye contact once more as he readjusts the bags in his arms. Close enough that you see the sparkle in his eyes.

You take a breath as your shoulders pass, mere inches of space between you. He still feels far away.

In for three, out for three. Breathe in.

It smells like strawberries and honey.

You smack your lips together as you continue on.

You're craving marshmallows.

Two Months Before

Park Jimin is scared.

Which isn't something he'd normally admit so easily. But, given the circumstances, he doesn't think too much of it.

Filling his cheeks with air, he gnaws on his bottom lip in thought. He's been chewing on it for so long he'll probably tear a whole in it, but he can't help it. Thinking back on the conversation he'd had hours before scares him. Leaves him with an unsettling feeling in his stomach. Anxious, deadly butterflies.

"How're things with Y/N?" Taehyung sits back, sipping from a stark white coffee mug. "Not that we don't see you guys every two weeks, but, you know."

Jimin laughs, shaking his head. "They're good. She's good, amazing." He's smiling so wide his cheeks hurt. 

"God, stop looking like a lovesick fool", his friend teases. He tilts his head, scoffing. "Propose already." Jimin must look as lost as he feels, because Taehyung raises an eyebrow. "You okay?"

He blinks, rolling his shoulders. "Yeah, I'm good. I guess I just...never thought about it. Marriage and stuff. I mean, I have, I just…" He shrugs, eyebrows furrowed. "Never really thought about it too in detail." Why does his stomach feel like this?

"Do you want to marry her?"

"Yes." The answer is instant. Something hidden underneath, but something all known. 

Taehyung smiles. "That was pretty fast. Are you sure you've never thought about it?"

Jimin wets his lips, clearing his throat. "Guess it just...doesn't make sense with anyone else. It makes sense with her though. It feels right."

The blue haired male across from him smirks, huffing out a laugh. "Guess you'll need a ring then, huh?"

Marriage had always been a far away concept. Something to be worried about later down the line. It seemed like, without even realising it, down the line had come sooner than he expected. He's known Y/N for five years, and while every moment has been one he wouldn't give up, it's sped by so fast. 

But when he thinks about it, it doesn't make sense if it isn't her. Nothing makes sense if it's not her. If he closes his eyes and pictures his wedding day, no matter what, in every scenario, every way you look at it, she's the one walking down the aisle. Every time. It's her.

Jimin reaches into the dresser drawer beside the bed, feeling around until he finds what he's searching for. His fingers brush against the velvet box he'd shoved in there an hour earlier. When he brings it out, the butterflies in his stomach have friends. 

He wants to marry her. He wants to do it right. He wants to put this ring on her finger and watch her eyes light up. And plan the wedding with her and discuss color schemes and where to seat guests at the reception. Wants to kiss her in front of a room of people as his wife for the first time. He wants to adopt a dog and buy a house with a backyard.

Park Jimin wants to do all of this, and he wants it to feel right, and it only feels right with her.

But if she said no. If she didn't want him the way he wanted her. Park Jimin is terrifyingly in love with her. The type of love that makes him crazy. That makes him wake up early just to pull her back into his arms, because he knows how she likes being held. Because he knows her.

So if she didn't need him like he needed her, he doesn't think he'd be able to handle it. Because she may be able to walk away and find someone new, but he won't.

She's it for him. This is it for him. He doesn't think there's ever gonna be anyone else. 

He's loved her every day since the moment he met her.

The not wanting is what might tear him to pieces. Can nervous butterflies die?

The sound of keys turning in lock nab his attention, and he jumps to his feet, heart in his throat. Something in him aches. "Jimin? I'm home!"

Rubbing his thumb over the velvet box once more, he slips it back into the drawer, way in the back. He closes it, and breathes. In for three, out for three. Jimin looks up, and puts on a smile, even with this ache.

He loves her.

"Coming!"

✒ tags : @lysjeon @goldenlilyz @savageprince7

#park jimin imagine #park jimin x y/n #park jimin x reader #park jimin x you #park jimin #jimin #jimin x reader #jimin x y/n #jimin x you #park jimin imagines #jimin imagines #jimin imagine #bts imagine #bts imagines #bts x reader #bts x y/n #bts x you #bts #dej_writes

[hanniejji]

TAGS UWU

So I was tagged three times and since I wasn't able to do it on my phone I had to do it on my computer lmao anyway I got tagged by my sweet cakes(@hyunjinsgiggle ), the sunshine (@felegs ), and this cutie (@stayuwu ) this is going to be long btw im sorry and the ending is very depressing ignore it

Bold Tag

Rules: bold the ones that apply to you!

Appearance:

I’m over 5'5 / I wear glasses/contacts / I have blonde hair / I wear sweatshirts a lot / I prefer loose clothing to tight clothing / I have one or more piercings / I have at least one tattoo / I have blue eyes / I have dyed or highlighted my hair / I have gotten plastic surgery / I have or had braces / I sunburn easily / I have freckles / I paint my nails / I typically wear makeup / I don’t often smile / I am pleased with how I look / I prefer Nike to Adidas / I wear baseball hats backwards

Hobbies and talents:

I play a sport / I can play an instrument / I am artistic / I know more than one language / I have won a trophy in some sort of competition / I can cook or bake without a recipe / I know how to swim / I enjoy writing / I can do origami / I prefer movies on TV shows / I can execute a perfect somersault / I enjoy singing / I could survive in the wild on my own / I have read a new book series this year / I enjoy spending time with friends / I travel during school or work brakes / I can do a handstand

Experiences:

I have had my first kiss / I have gotten drunk / I have told a crush I like them / I have traveled outside of the country / I have flown on an airplane / I have stayed awake for more than 48 hours / I have had a near-death experience / I have caught something on fire / I have performed in a talent show / I have shot a gun / I have been on TV / I have gone scuba diving / I have broken a bone / I have slow-danced / I have gone on a shopping spree

Relationships:

I am in a relationship / I have been single for over a year / I have a crush / I have a best friend I have known for over ten years / my parents are together / I have dated my best friend / I am adopted / my crush have confessed to me / I have had a long-distance relationship / I am an only child / I give advice to my friends / I have made an online friend / I met up with someone I have met online

Aesthetics:

I have heard the ocean in a conch shell / I have watched the sun rise / I enjoy rainy days / I have slept under the stars / I meditate outside / the sound of chirping calms me / I enjoy the smell of the beach / I know what snow tastes like / I listen to music to fall asleep / I enjoy thunderstorms / I enjoy cloud watching / I have attended a bonfire / I pay close attention to colors / I find mystery in the ocean / I enjoy hiking on nature paths / Autumn is my favorite season

Miscellaneous:

I can fall asleep in a moving vehicle / I am the mom friend / I live by a certain quote / I like the smell of sharpies / I am involved in extracurricular activities/ I enjoy Mexican food / I can drive stick-shift / I have memorized an entire song in a day / I believe in true love / I dream up scenarios to fall asleep / I sing in the shower / I wish I lived in a video game / I have a canopy above my bed / I am Multi-racial / I am a redhead / I own at least three dogs / I am LGBR

I'm about to answer 33 questions wow I feel like I'm on an examination

11 questions tag

by sweet cakes:

1. what is your fashion sense?

I have a lot of styles depending on the weather or my mood. I mostly do the sweater/jacket + high waisted shorts hehe or turtle neck + shorts + cardigan/jacket. when I'm lazy, which is always, I wear an oversize hoodie and shorts and the occasional cap hihi I have a weird sense of fashion

2. what is your favourite season?

I like rainy, or windy. any is fine as long as I don't sweat like hell adfaslsja I hate summer

3. if you could go on holiday anywhere, where?

I love going to beaches but tbh anywhere with good views is fine, it doesn't matter since the most important thing for me is that I get the experience and take lots of photos if they have a lot of delicious foods then that's better oof

4. what is one quote you live by?

"learn to stand on your own feet" has a very special place in my heart

5. would you ever get a tattoo, and if so, what and where?

I would want a snowflake, because we're not alone falling down

6. what is your favourite song at the minute?

at the moment, it's nobody knows by youngjae and fine by yugyeom ✨✨

7. what is one album you would listen to for the rest of your life?

I still listen to Linkin Park songs because of the meaningful and relatable lyrics

8. what is your favourite memory from the last year?

it has to be the one time my mom said she's proud of me :')

9. what is one regret you have?

not being able to make friends easily :'( I find it hard to do

10. would you change aforementioned regret?

maybe :'(

11. if you could have any food in the world to eat right now, what would it be?

How dare you make me choose I can't possibly choose between different varieties of foods :'( fries, frappe, and shawarma w/o cucumber pls

by sunshine 🌞

1. what’s one thing that helps you relax?

probably sleeping with soft background music

2. what’s your favorite novel and author?

I'd rather poetry :') sea of strangers by lang leav is amazing

3. are you an affectionate person? if so, how do you show affection?

I'm more like the closet affectionate person hehe but when I'm tired or sleepy I get clingy a lot but I'm mostly through small actions, I'm not comfortable with saying "I miss you" or whatever unless I'm typing them

4. are you an early bird or a night owl?

totally a night owl

5. if you’re comfortable with it, do you have a song you connect to something or someone, and if so, what is it?

sorry by halsey, broken home by 5sos

6. if you could go back to a place you’ve been to before, where would it be?

the beach we went to last vacation :')

7. what does your favorite piece of clothing - that you own yourself - look like?

a very comfy oversized hoodie, it's black with front pocket, sweater paaaaws, and it has a small doodle of neptune on the back

8. who’s your bias and why?

bias? I don't know her

9. do you believe in luck and miracles?

yas, my aunt is actually a fortune teller? idk? but she knows a lot about those and spirits thing but since I have low self confidence I mostly sound like I don't believe in them

10. what’s your favorite type of decorations?

aesthetic and pastel colors ✨

11. do you prefer being outside or inside?

booooth

by cutie :

1. Are you a daydreamer? If so, what do you dream about?

sometimes I just space out without even realizing

2. What’s your favorite place in the world?

home

3. What’s home to you?

somewhere that no one can judge me, a safety place, a place where I can let loose and be comfortable and not give a care about anything

4. This is not a question but quote a vine.

"oh hell noOooOoOOoOooOooOO"

5. Grey’s anatomy or House?

what i don't watch any of these

6. Do you have any pets?

a lame excuse of a cat

7. What kind of friend are you? (You know, the mom friend, the meme friend, etc).

the mom friend, scolds you 25/8, gives advises everywhere, comforts you, takes things seriously, drops everything just to listen to you unless I'm in a very bad mood, sacrifices for you, boyfriend material (according to my friend), secretly soft, lazy but exerts effort when needed, randomly does weird things and dances to fortnite, supports you, but lowkey doesn't do the same for myself lol because I'm emo and you can hear me saying bad things about myself 27/10 and pushing you away lol

I don't share my food unless you're important lmao

8. Do you hate someone? If so, why?

fake peopleeee

9. What’s your dream job?

to be a journalism

10. What MCU character resembles you the most? (not physically, more like mentally and emotionally).

probably wanda

11. I won’t use this eleven question as an actual question, use your right to answer to this to talk about whatever the fuck you want. Rant, fangirl, talk about what you did today or yesterday or whatever. Just talk.

I just want to cry to someone but I don't have the heart to tell anyone, I don't know why but I get stressed so easily and that one time our nurse had a seminar and asked if anyone is depressed, I just want to raise my hand but I'm too scared someone will judge me and think of me as a weak person, like now, and she started this speech about how to beat depression and I just can't understand how is that going to work because it doesn't work on me. I'm getting tired of constantly getting sad for no reason and it's bothering my classmates and I hate bothering them I feel like I'm annoying so I kept these thoughts to myself. It's hard trying to avoid spacing out and being so quiet all of the sudden, I'm getting mad at myself for being pathetic and I did the "do" once because I was so desperate to feel something other than sadness and I couldn't even tell anyone and right now I feel like this rant I'm doing is bothering everyone I hate being like this :'(

I'm doooonneee hehehehe that took me like a long time and I should really sleep now :') I will reblog this with my 11 questions and tags because tumblr has limits ugh

[raefill]

I would legit love to hear you answers to every single question. I don't know if you feel like actually doing them all, but if you did... I'm JUST SAYING I'D READ THE ANSWERS, ok.

1: Is there a boy/girl in your life?Yeaaaah but my romantic prospects are pretty bleak tbh, I graduate and move away in a few months

2: Think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them?No, not really. But I’m not mad about it anymore.

3: What do you think of when you hear the word “meow?”CUTE BABY CLOSE BY !!!!!!!!!

4: What’s something you really want right now?to cry, i’m having the big sads

5: Are you afraid of falling in love?always

6: Do you like the beach?i love the beach!!!!!!!!! i grew up in a seaside town, the beach feels like the best parts of home

7: Have you ever slept on a couch with someone else?yes ?? it was cramped and uncomfortable 

8: What’s the background on your cell?the photo of me, san, kahl, chez, frau, bagel and spags in the louvre

9: Name the last four beds you were sat on?mine(right now), Thea’s, Lizzie’s, .. Keir’s?

10: Do you like your phone?yeah but i’d like it more if the screen wasn’t so cracked

11: Honestly, are things going the way you planned?lol no, it’s definitely not

12: Who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?i genuinely don’t remember !

13: Would you rather have a poodle or a Rottweiler?rottweiler, i love dogs that look a little mean but have big hearts

14: Which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?pffffft, that’s hard to answer but i’d say generally emotional, most of the time it’s harder to get rid of emotional pain

15: Would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?both ?! i want to support the breeding of endangered animals that happens in zoos and see the cute animals but also i love a good rembrandt ?!

16: Are you tired?exhausted

17: How long have you known your 1st phone contact?since i was born

18: Are they a relative?my mother!

19: Would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes?not a fucking chance

20: When did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with?a few hours ago, i think

21: If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today?i don’t believe there’s a way to know nor do i think love works that way

22: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?hell yeah i would

23: How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now?none!

24: Is there a certain quote you live by?“if you make bad choices, own them” - my dad 

25: What’s on your mind?god, everything, idk im having a high key anxiety day

26: Do you have any tattoos?one pretty big one on my thigh

27: What is your favorite color?black !!!!!!!!!!

28: Next time you will kiss someone on the lips?maybe tomorrow, we’ll see how it goes

29: Who are you texting?uhhh, no one? everyone is asleep

30: Think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch?yes

31: Have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right?all the time, my gut rarely lies

32: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?yes, his name is keir and he’s one of my best friends

33: Do you think anyone has feelings for you?i mean i’m dating someone so i fucking hope so

34: Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?no ? i dont think ? i’ve had people say they’re big or the colour is interesting but idk

35: Say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?i’d cheer her on

36: Were you single on Valentines Day?yes

37: Are you friends with the last person you kissed?yes!

38: What do your friends call you?rae ?

39: Has anyone upset you in the last week?yes

40: Have you ever cried over a text?pffft, yah

41: Where’s your last bruise located?my knee

42: What is it from?i fell over my own computer chair

43: Last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad?today

44: Who was the last person you were on the phone with?my mum, i think

45: Do you have a favourite pair of shoes?not right now, most i just wear my plain black docs

46: Do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day?no, i just tie is back

47: Would you ever go bald if it was the style?no, i really dont like my ears, idk why

48: Do you make supper for your family?yeah, my mum and step dad can’t cook

49: Does your bedroom have a door?ofc it does? what kind of bedroom doesn’t have a door? get these pretentious loft bedrooms out of my face

50: Top 3 web-pages?tumblr, ao3, youtube

51: Do you know anyone who hates shopping?plenty!

52: Does anything on your body hurt?period pains are all the rage today

53: Are goodbyes hard for you?yeah but i don’t tend to cry until they’ve already left so i look like i take them just fine

54: What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?water......... this morning

55: How is your hair?fine? a bit damaged from the cold weather

56: What do you usually do first in the morning?wish i was still asleep

57: Do you think two people can last forever?yes

58: Think back to January 2007, were you single?i dont fucking know

59: Green or purple grapes?GREEN or get out of my face

60: When’s the next time you will give someone a BIG hug?tomorrow~

61: Do you wish you were somewhere else right now?yes

62: When will be the next time you text someone?tomorrow!

63: Where will you be 5 hours from now?probably in bed still, but asleep

64: What were you doing at 8 this morning.sleeping

65: This time last year, can you remember who you liked?no, i was getting over the end of a four year relationship

66: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?no

67: Did you kiss or hug anyone today?no

68: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?this sucks

69: Have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?many times

70: How many windows are open on your computer?ten! and they’re mostly your fics corey, go figure

71: How many fingers do you have?ten

72: What is your ringtone?i dont know, my phone is always on silent

73: How old will you be in 5 months?22 ~

74: Where is your Mum right now?sleeping in bed probably, idfk, she lives hours away

75: Why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love?we grew up and grew apart but we were still okay until i had about four-six months of depression where i had to stop myself from doing something stupid daily and he didn’t notice despite us living together and sharing a bedroom (and those times i told him and he shrugged)

76: Have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?yes

77: Are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?yes! i still love them very much

78: Do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7?annabelle

79: Is there anyone you know with the name Mike?yes, there’s some grad students in the psych department called mike, they all look kinda the same too

80: Have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?yeah, i miss being able to do that regularly

81: How many people have you liked in the past three months?more than i can count, my polyamorous ass has a crush on about seven people currently

82: Has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?no

83: Will you talk to the person you like tonight?i’m talking to one of them

84: You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?i’d literally never do this

85: If your BF/GF was into drugs would you care?depends which drugs and how often, no one cares about a joint every few months

86: What was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie?i spilled my popcorn and managed to hide that i had spilled it from my date pahaha

87: Who was your last received call from?my mum, wow it sounds like i talk to my mum a lot more than i do

88: If someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?yes, i hate bugs, give me the money

89: What is something you wish you had more of?time, energy, patience, money

90: Have you ever trusted someone too much?no, i’m not someone who trusts easily

91: Do you sleep with your window open?only in the summer

92: Do you get along with girls?yes, anyone that doesn’t get on with someone because of their gender is an asshole

93: Are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?nope

94: Does sex mean love?hell no, it can be an expression of it but no

95: You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?yeah she wold be freaking the fuck out because she’s locked in a room!

96: Have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring?no, actually, i haven’t

97: Did you sleep alone this week?yes

98: Everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you?yes ? 

99: Do you believe in love at first sight?no, not at all

100: Who was the last person that you pinky promise?one of my besties, holly

#this took forever #but i definitely feel more tired now #rae answers #xenophonspeaks

[mysme-hcs]

Match-up with a male: I'm 5'1" and 112lbs, not very active. Don't exercise on my own, but I'll wander town/nature if suggested; mostly I'm indoors, likely on my computer. Love to write, sing and pun. I smile and joke easily, and befriend everyone I can. Can't handle too much social interaction; have anxiety/depression issues I don't share with many. More likely to smile and hide to deal with problems on my own than ask for help, but it can noticeably affect me and last for days/longer. (1/6)

[Under a “Read More” to prevent spam. I won’t use these often, but if you can’t view this post on the app, try pasting the link into a mobile browser or open it on desktop!]

Always eager to learn, from history to languages to cooking. I'll try anything at least once. Rambled about the Elder Futhark multiple times; don't get me started on mythology (especially dragons, shocker). I also love to debate and listen to others ramble. When researching (probably for writing) I'll take lots of notes, with different colored pens and whiteboards and sketches. I'm... thorough?I have THE MESSIEST room; hard to get motivated to clean without music/outside influence. But I'll (2/6)

do my job, and then some; it's important to do your work, and do it right the first time. I swing between eating a lot to forgetting to eat; I do better with reminders. Sometimes like the cutesy little sister, or the worrying supportive big sister. Easily startled, not easily spooked. Think all animals are adorable/cool. (Except bees.) Generally have a good idea of who means well for me, who means ill, who I can open my heart to and how seriously I should take what they say. Apparently good(3/6)

at entertaining kids and keeping them in line? Will support others as much as I can, and step up to take care of something they won't/are having trouble with (i.e. work tasks, flagging down waiters, asking awkward questions, apprehending shoplifters, etc.).I can cuss up a storm, but am professional when required. I'll stop if someone's uncomfortable. (I have kid-friendly swears JIC.) The one who says "press cancel" instead of "press the red button" in case someone's colorblind. Compliments (4/6)

on appearance don't mean much, but comments on singing/writing/etc. make me awkward and bashful. I try to be fun, for as long as I can handle it until I retreat to my lair! I'll be silly to make someone laugh/feel normal, or join in on the silliness someone else already started.But I will get serious, and I want to be taken seriously when I do even if I'm smiling. When I say I love you, I mean it, even the fiftieth time. Privacy and honesty are also important. Definitely want someone I can (5/6)

[ha]ve fun with, discover the world with, who wouldn't push if I need quiet/alone time, but still offer his support. Sometimes, just a text or being there is enough. But cuddle-days are also welcome. He'd have to deal with my awful habits/quirks though: Sleep is fickle, I make odd (sometimes cat) noises, can be forgetful, and will get hit with anxiety/depression without warning. A slow relationship is fine. No kids in the immediate future. (6/6) Phew! Sorry for rambling aha. Hope this works for you?

Sure! Since you said this was your first match-up, I tried to make it super special :3

I match you up with....

Yoosung! 

Yoosung isn’t very active either (he pretty much sits around and plays video games all day) so you have nothing to worry about here!

But sometimes he’d try to get the two of you out of the house and take a walk every night after dinner

It’d be super comfortable, the sun setting and his hand in yours as you walk along the busy city streets and chat on park benches

And when you both have tired out, he’d be open to cuddling and listening to each other ramble

LOLOL most likely has dragons and other mythical creatures, so if you want to, he’ll teach you 

Loves hearing you talk about dragons and mythology because both they and the fact that you know so much about them is really interesting to him

Even though he doesn’t pay attention in school he’d take a class in mythology just so he can talk a little more in-depth with you, same goes for any of your other interests ;)

Yoosung also enjoys cooking, so the two of you can try out new recipes and he can share tips from both himself and his mother

No matter how bad or good, Yoosung will always laugh at your puns

Also loves hearing you sing and if you think he won’t compliment you about it until he’s blue in the face, you’re quite wrong

Anything you write = he’ll read

Not just because this boy adores anything and everything you do, he genuinely likes your writing and is interested in your characters

If there’s anything you need to research for your writing, he isn’t above taking you to every bookstore/library/Noogling everything/or asking 707 for help finding what you need

Constantly surprises you with new notebooks, pens, and sketchbooks to help with your note-taking

And oh boy

It’s canon that his apartment is insanely messy (cockroaches, mold, etc) so the two of you together....

RIP

Sooo (mostly because of Jaehee and Zen’s complaints) you’ll have cleaning days once every two weeks!

It sounds lame but since you’re a hard worker and he doesn’t want to disappoint you, everything will get clean in no time

what even are these, I’m so sorry this is all random lmao

He doesn’t like to argue with you, but he’d be open to debating sometimes!

He most definitely needs help staying on task/focusing/and just overall doing his work, so having you around helps him immensely

Don’t need a ton of social interaction? He’ll take your needs into consideration and try to take you out of uncomfortable situations

He also understands that problems with depression and anxiety are private matters, but he hopes that when things get bad you’ll come to him

Would learn how to tell when you’re upset and would automatically try to take care of the situation or would just be beside you. Again, he knows they’re private matters, but he doesn’t want you to feel alone

Anything you want to learn, he’ll try to take up as well and turn it into a couple activity ^-^

Yoosung also likes animals, and he’s probably terrified of bees too

He’d be willing to sacrifice himself to them if it meant you being okay though

Yoosung thinks that you being good with kids is adorable!

He obviously wants some, but if you don’t then he’ll drop the subject

Finds your support sosososo encouraging

Yoosung was honestly a little shocked by your swearing at first, but it quickly grew on him and sometimes he uses a few of them oops 

You don’t need to tell him to take you seriously because he always does

 he’s okay with stepping away for a while to let you be if you need space or to be alone, he’ll just make sure to remind you that he’ll be in the next room

The two of you are always saying “I love you”, once Zen and 707 threatened to deafen themselves if y’all didn’t stop

Yoosung also would rather being around someone who is fun, so he often tries to make the time you spend together enjoyable

Can’t sleep? CuDdLeS under warm blankets and stuffed animals surrounding you

Would rub your back and play with your hair until you can fall asleep

If you’re forgetful, he has your back! In fact, it makes him feel more important to you when he can remember something you can’t

Expect cute little texts all throughout the day

Hope you enjoyed your match-up!

[peppak0pig-blog]

The way to Organize a youngster to see (Short-run) When You Don't Have Kids - How you can Plan for a child to check out (Quick) If You Don't Have Little ones - How you can Get ready for a child to go to (Short-run) Once You Don't Have Little ones

Tips on how to Plan for a Kid to see (Quick) After You Don't Have Kids

There was a part of time (a hundred years back? Fine, definitely only eight) whenever i thought to myself personally "why can't she simply make her kid respond and avoid breaking up my items?" I was thinking this about an excellent pal. Someone I had noted for several years ahead of that they had little ones. I just questioned her parenting methods (within my go, naturally). Due to the fact possessing young children I realize that in some cases you can find little you can do regarding your kids' conduct and quite often they are certainly not getting bad but alternatively eager, drained or have far too much strength and want an electric outlet. This information is focused on the pals without the need of young children, the grandparents who haven't had kids approximately for some time, the brand new aunts and uncles, and someone else wanting a concise word stop by coming from a infant. It is made to assist you to "newborn proof" your house for this small guests in addition to their grubby little palms that are looking to contact your glass miniatures and bring on Fluffy's tail.

Baby (newborn baby-1 12 months)

Pre-moving babies are quite easy to little one-evidence for. Make sure you vacuum your room you might be engaging in to make sure that all the little scraps and fuzzes are over the surface to limitation the volume of yuck the kid can placed into their mouth. Also i enjoy having a thoroughly clean blanket useful to put on to the floor that way it will be just a little milder, of course, if the structure in the said blanket is dazzling or appealing, it could possibly distract the child for a little. A diaper transform is likely to take place throughout the pay a visit to so planning that can prevent you from simply being on the spot in the future. Just laying out a towel with an absorbent pad at the top (feel puppy patches) on the spare sleep is ideal. Several other considerations that are very good to have on-palm is actually a couple newborn washcloths (the inexpensive very soft versions) or newborn baby wipes to remove confronts, noses, and hands and fingers. For little ones even closer to each year, rice puffs (or rusks) and applesauce are great wholesome goodies.

Furthermore, i ensure that my canines are put away. In both the lawn, garage area or maybe the downstairs room. My dogs Enjoy babies. There exists nothing at all such as a 110 pound German Shepherd laying around the quilt near the newborn slicking the baby's locks rear with puppy spit. Even if this sight warms my center, it offers triggered standard queasiness in certain of my girlfriends (I really like my dogs). I do know that my dogs would never purposely trigger harm to a young child, but probably none of my buddies (only S) experience the way I actually do about canines. Even your most dog-supportive good friends may have a unique mindset once a fragile baby makes its way into their lifestyle. The simplest way to stay away from any awkwardness would be to just keep the canines out from the mixture at this time. Plus if there need to happen to be a knock at the door you understand the baby won't be trampled during the mayhem that will most definitely ensue.

Young child (1-24 months)

This stage in the child's living may be harder to arrange for. Be certain that cords are beyond vision, electrical retailers are either not reachable or have plug covers on (these are definitely low cost, don't take a risk on this). Take away all breakable things through the bottom cabinets, this consists of publications and photo albums you don't want torn. The good thing regarding this age is you can commonly just position stuff earlier mentioned 3-feet (using a desk or counter-top) to keep them out of reach. Preschoolers use items to support on their own, so be sure that the home furniture in which they will be participating in is long lasting (healthy) where there aren't any products which could topple away with some wobbling (think tall lighting fixtures, crystal vases). My all time most severe example of this is usually a Television set tray. We obtained a single seated in between the chair and recliner to hold the remotes and drinks. My child (then 8 a few months classic) dragged themselves up making use of the dish. Seven years down the road she still has a L-fashioned scar on her forehead from drawing the dish in addition to themselves.

You may totally have to be sure that the child fails to run around unwatched, so be ready to be traveling! Young children get started climbing at this time and if left behind to their personal units experience an uncanny capacity to get involved with the oddest mishaps. Till they turn out to be acquainted with your property, you will probably have a number of bumps and bruises regardless of how careful you are (you have to have observed bad Mr. C when S first delivered him to our own residence). A child frosty load, mist antiseptic, and some entertaining bandages will probably get utilized if you have them.

Now bear in mind they are fixes for when you have a kid around for two hours. If you are planning to achieve the youngster around regularly then you ought to produce a place that is definitely kid risk-free. If both you and your close friend have espresso just about every Thursday then perhaps you would like to child-evidence the family bedroom while keeping it doing this so that you will not be transferring points around just about every Thursday a . m . just to place them again Thursday afternoon. If the cooking area is really a much better location you could position some rubberized rings or case tresses all around your reduced cabinets addresses then placed a newborn entrance to make sure infant does not walk off. Furthermore, i find it necessary to have a handful of age group-ideal Peppa Pig Portugues toy that hang all around my home. These peppa pig playthings then become something special to play with during visits.

Also, in no way ignore the effectiveness of a great goody. Select a thing they are able to supply by themselves. I enjoy Puffs as they are safe for younger eaters and shop properly, but other fantastic options are squeezable berry kits, Cheerios, string parmesan cheese, and grapes or strawberries. Always remember to ask a parent prior to supplying any sort of foodstuff to the little one (no it can't injured them should they don't obtain it but it can ignite a tantrum once they imagined they could and next don't). In case the check out will involve dinner most children this era can take in the very same food you need to do (enquire about allergic reactions your day just before) just minimize into compact parts and make certain it's cooled away. Developing a young children dinnerware established just for them will be a welcome big surprise.

Walkers (2-4 years)

This era turns into a tiny trickier. Once youngsters are strolling the earth gets to be their oyster. Everything will be explored which means while you do not have to be so cautious of sliding furnishings, you still need to keep close track of them at all times. I actually have found out that if they are calm signifies they may be into something. One time i discontinued by try to do 10-minutes or so of laptop or computer admission. I had my daughter (then 2) with me. She was correct outside the house my place of work; I was able to see her should i leaned my desk chair back. I was thinking she was okay because there were clearly half a dozen people at work with me. I covered up a few things i started in to carry out from the anticipated time period considering to personally how good she had been only to discover she obtained identified a marker and driven all over the wall. Give thanks to goodness it only included in my time a trip to a store to discover a Magical Eraser (enjoy this product) not a gallon of color! One of the obstacles I at present encounter is my aged kids' peppa pig completo toys. Anytime my girlfriends arrive more than I am just consistently picking them up due to the fact essentially every one of them appear to have small areas that happen to be choking threats for the kids within 3. Barbie boots and Lego's are my nemeses. I treatment this case by having the more mature kids shift all of their play doh kids toys in the household or dining-room and put them in their bedrooms. I allow my pal recognize that family members room an dining area are secure and utilize a newborn door. The non permanent kinds that strain in shape on the retaining wall are relatively inexpensive and you may use for animals and children.

Large Children (4 years and over)

This stage needs to be trick confirmation, appropriate? They aren't planning to choke, drop or poison their selves. It always is, although i simply want to add more a number of tidbits to help you out. Initially, I frequently forget that my kids can now read through. Normally i often keep this in mind as I am perusing Facebook or twitter, then one of my buddies has submitted an issue that is PG, and after that my 8-yr old want's me to define what that word indicates or my 6-years old really wants to the way that they created that puppy have a picture like this. After which I help remind them to not study above my arm and usually put the saying "I can't enable you to get to pay for consideration once i want, but once I want 5 minutes all alone I come to be exciting?" This is correct among all press I am just discovering. Not alone your computer, but the Television and books. The kids can all function the remote control and I have experienced to remember to never abandon my relationship novels laying all around. Even though you likely don't threat a meltdown from food cravings from young children this time, healthful snacks are normally good to get accessible. Most importantly, remember that whatever you they have will want (actually this commences at about two) and so the far more it is possible to steer clear of having or having what you don't want (or can't) talk about when in front of them the better.

A small expense of time when you tiny visitor arrives over will make your check out far less stress filled and you will (though not an assurance) be able to have a comprehensive talk using your buddy. More than anything else remember to benefit from the time together with your close friend regardless of whether it will require a little more efforts.

By Hillary Warner (Otherwise known as H of Beyond the Sippy Glass)

For a wide range of particular recommendations on era-correct goods (some are even pig toy), useful suggestions on how to ease your being a parent worries and unbiased news go to the Beyond the Sippy Mug blog site

Superb Advice On Peppa Pig Brasil toy To Help You Choose The Best!

Some people consider shopping for kids' peppa pig completo toys is easy. They make their way to the store, make their decision, and leave. But, those people who are wise will perform their investigation concerning how to get fantastic peppa pig completo toy at low prices. This article will help you attain that.

When shopping for your son or daughter a Peppa Pig em Portugues 2017 toys, be sure to look at the notice label. At times better business bureau toys are choking dangers, at other times they contain a lot more dangerous products, and frequently they may be violent in nature. peppa pig portugues brasil toys usually have reviews that advise the proper time varies for the use, so make sure you read that details.

When purchasing play doh kids toys toy for toddlers it is important to choose the one which is targeted for their grow older. Select play doh learn colors toy with colour and consistency. This is the grow older when youngsters understand finest making use of eyesight and taste, and contact. You also want to select a peppa pig kids toys that may be not a choking hazard and non-toxic.

Do a little analysis to discover precisely what the finest play doh kids toy around are this coming year. You may be able to uncover versions at the start of the vacation time of year. It can be used to obtain suggestions for play-doh toys to buy for your kids. Go shopping early on so you can figure out which play doh kids toys toy to get.

It is crucial to help make the right selection when shopping for play doh learn colors toys for incredibly young kids. Opt for a pig toys that is mild and also has vivid textures and colours. At this early age, kids find out by touching, experiencing, seeing and hearing and tasting. When they input it with their lips, also, acquire low-poisonous peppa pig compilation toys which will not injury the little one.

In the event your teenage is effective, contemplate shopping for them a play doh learn colors toy that is definitely associated with athletics. Active teens might like baseball safety gloves, bats and baseballs or maybe hockey goals and objectives. You will also give them the opportunity to be in shape, although you not alone give an active teenager a chance to get some enjoyable having a game they appreciate.

"peppa pig english episodes toys" that help your children make one thing are fantastic. These can come by means of version rockets and watercraft. On the other hand, airplanes and they are created for teenagers. Ant chemistry and farms or technology packages will also be good options. These assist youngsters with adhering to information, essential wondering, and reading understanding.

Examine peppa pig dublado toy recalls, before purchasing applied peppa toys. If it was recalled, the person marketing it may well not have access to any idea. It's your job to appear it before that buy. Browse Search engines for play doh learn colors toys that have been recalled.

When buying peppa pig toys toys for youngsters it is essential that you see just what the come back and swap insurance plan is. Kids change their brains regularly. A peppa toy they relative morning might be thrown away another. It's an excellent point as a way to exchange or come back the pig toys, really should this example arise.

Make sure that the Peppa Pig English Episodes toy remains safe and secure for preschoolers. A toddler's pig toy has to be long lasting (to survive common playtime usage) and totally free of modest areas. Additionally, you will have the ability to save some money in the future by buying play doh learn colors toy that your chosen kid can expand with. Some makes of peppa pig full episodes toys supply ways to adjust them so they are more desirable as the youngster grows.

Getting read this full post, you might be now in a position to buy excellent peppa pig play doh kids toys. It's these Peppa Pig Portugues toy that your chosen baby can play with time and time again. Use what you've just discovered to buy the right play doh peppa pig toy.

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Eradicate Fungus In Bathtub doh toys Storage

As the children age, bathtime has probably evolved into one among their most favorite situations for the day. Choosing area to store their play doh peppa pig toy from the washroom can be hard because lets face the facts, for most of us you can find a lot less room in this restrooms to keep stuff in comparison to any other identify in this households. Choosing the best varieties of safe-keeping is not hard there is however a very important factor most mothers and fathers are likely to forget about. That is mildew and mildew. Men and women frequently don't understand how quickly it may build up and develop within doh toy or in the storing containers themselves. That's why it really is imperative to do away with mildew within your shower play doh kids toys toy storing and make your kids' Peppa pig em Portugues Brasil toy nice and clean.

To avoid one thing from happening we have to recognize how it gets there to start with. Fungus varieties on shower peppa pig games once they aren't dried up appropriately or are left to sit down in h2o at the bottom of an safe-keeping container. All however this fungus doesn't genuinely have any significant health threats that you must be having to worry about, it's gross as soon as your kids find out it's there they most likely won't desire to use all those unique play doh videos toys any more. Enabling the bath play doh kids toys toys and anything they are stored in to free of moisture adequately is the key to reducing this unsightly mold from forming from the beginning.

Shop shower play doh kids toys toy exactly where they are able to adequately deplete. A very typical method of accomplishing this would be to allow them to dried up away from on the inside of a mesh bag or inside a crate of some sort or other which enables air flow to enter and get out of. Correct airflow is a large consider stuff drying correctly. There are a vast quantity of receptacles or "scoops" you may buy that will be a terrific repair for this particular difficulty. A lot of them may also find the attention of your respective baby which makes it a product they would like to include in their bath just as much as their own Peppa Pig English Episodes toys.

Prevent maintaining play doh peppa pig kids toy in buckets or any other issues in which the h2o can collect at the base and relax the Peppa Pig Portugues toy. At these times it are only a question of time before revolting mildew begins to type around everything your kid is using. This mold is obviously something we don't want floating approximately from the bath tub and getting around our little ones.

This doesn't imply you have to hand dried out each and every peppa pig dublado toy between baths, but be sure you bare out drinking water which may be in the silicone ducky and also other this kind of Peppa pig em Portugues Brasil toys. Never forget this - No matter what selection you decide on, in case the Peppa Pig English Episodes toy don't dry out effectively, you will not be at liberty with any product you deliver property. The most effective option is one that permits peppa pig toys to dried up and properly merchants them between baths.

If you are considering learning more about bath peppa pig play doh kids toy storage area