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sstvrnioloo · 1 month

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Open Arms - Matt Sturniolo

warnings: panic attack, kissing, use of y/n, degradation thoughts, use of pet names, & fluffy fluff

POC FRIENDLYYY !!

summary: y/n has a panic attack because she was petrified of falling behind and disappointing people around her. Not wanting to be to annoying or clingy to Matt, and trying not let people down. Matt assists and reassures that she’s not letting people down and she’s doing great.

a/n: sorry if this is bad, but leave reqs in my inbox anytime, ily💕 also i know after party pt.4 has been put off awhile but i’m making time to fix it😭🤞

wc: 1k

not proofread (a bitch dont got no time for that shit)

based off of this song ↓

“when no one’s around me, you lost and found me, i was surrounded, with open, open, open, Open Arms”

y/n’s pov

fucking stupid idiot. you should have done it but look where you are now. from before i had 2 things on my to-do list

・Flashback・

“well, i’ll do it later.”

i wrote it down on my to-do list. i pet my dogーkelani and hug her,

“it’s okay i will get to it.”

i wrote down “get this week’s groceries and kelani’s dog food”

just make sure to get to it y/n.

・Now・

i had well over 7 things on my to-do list. i should’ve just done it while I could. so fucking dumb y/n. why do you let this happen? first it was my college classes, food for my dorm, the triplet’s birthday, my car repairs, my sister’s wedding back in london , my mom wants me to visit her in new york, and I have to study for my literature exam. if I don’t get anything for the triplet’s birthday they’ll definitely be disappointed, if i don’t visit my momーshe’ll definitely be upset; and if I don’t go to my sister’s wedding in london, i’m going to be seen as disrespectful to my elders.

i felt something bad was gonna happen but i wasn’t sure.

I was leaning on my bed, going through the list over and overーscolding myself each time. a sharp pain drilled through my chestーa new type of painーsomething i’d never felt before. but this? this hurt like hell. and all at the same time my vision got blurred and breathing became impossible. i’d decided that i had to call matt. he’d surely know how to deal with this, right? as i continued sobbing repeatedly, with breathing impeccably difficult, and my vision completely shattered. my phone rung a couple times, then,

finally he answered.

“hey baby what’s up?”

“matt i- n-need help”

my voice was in a mid-whisper but he still heard it.

“please help m-“

my voice was cut by me dropping my phone.

all of a sudden, my palms sweat and feel prickly and my clothes are overly tight. i hug myself and get into a fetal position, feeling like everything is wrong and i’m going to let everyone down and be one big disappointment.

matt’s pov

we were filming friday’s car video when i got that call from y/n. her voice sounded like she was crying, but she said help me. what the fuck happened?

“hey guys something is wrong with y/n”

“what happened?” chris questioned.

“her voice was all shaky and it sounded like she was crying or shit”

no questions were asked. nick didn’t yell or go on a rant about leaving. just driving.

ೃ༄

when i got to her room she was laying on the floor in fetal position, weeping, sobbing. god i hate to see her like this. curls laid out around her shoulder and her beautiful face covered in tears.

"matty?"

"yes baby its me"

"i don't know what to do matt," y/n said in between sobs whilst grabbing her chest trying to breathe.

i held y/n against me and tell me what's wrong.

"what's wrong y/n?"

"m-my vision went blurry and breathing became impossible and my palms felt like they were being poked by a million needles, my clothes got too tight and and-"

"you're having a panic attack y/n"

she didn't hear me so she went on about what happened.

"im going to let everyone down mattーthey're never gonna forgive me,"

"i have too much on my to-do list and if i dont do it i'm letting everyone down"

"look baby we're gonna take it one step at a time, one thing at a time."

"o-okay"

"let's breathe in on 3, okay?"

"okay"

y/n’s pov

i took a nice breath in then repeated the same motion, breathing out. my vision got better, my clothes stopped feeling too tight, palms stopped being pricked.

"thank you matt"

"of course y/n"

ೃ༄

we crossed off things of my to-do list, one by one, and before i realized i only had 2 things left on to-do list; like before.

i've never had a panic attack before and that attack could have been worse. but before i could spiral and get lost inside the darkness, i found my light.

matt was my light.

he was there for me, and always there with Open Arms

ೃ༄

extra: first of all, im so so so so so sorry for starving you all to fucking death; this fic took me forever😭😭

but tysm for reading !!

xoxo, riri <3

taglist: 🏷 @lovingmattysposts @elliesturniolo1 @elliewrites1 @sturnsbitch @lovingmattysposts @luvmxtt @novasturniolo03 @tyjna6 @sturnlova @sturniolo-lover1317 @patscorner

(comment here be on the taglist !!)

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leclerced · 3 months

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But for now I thought about sth else. As a friend of people that have absolutely the worst taste in men (and women but that’s my brother so imma just keep him out of it cause he’s on a whole other level lol) I thought about boys being green or red flag in their girl’s friends eyes.

Lando is a red flag. I love him and he’s my baby but I can’t lie to myself…he’s a fucking red flag. If any of my friends met him they’d be like “bitch you’re giving us lectures about who’s right or not for us but you end up with him?!!! Hypocrite.”

Oscar is a green flag through and through. At least one of my besties would ask if we’re ever trying poly cause if so she’s all there for it. But they’d be worried about my sex life that’s for sure. Not that I think Oscar is bad I just think you can think that when meeting him for the first time

Charles is kind of green but they put like…red dots over it. Because yes he’s nice, he’s a gentleman and looks like can give me the orgasms I deserve but something’s off they just don’t know what yet

Max wouldn’t get a verdict they’re still deciding for like days after meeting him and hesitantly give him a green flag. They think he’s a sweetheart but just a bit too hard to figure out

Carlos would be green for the first few minutes and red for the rest of his life. That’s just how it works lmao

lando is a red flag because he jokes around but hurts her feelings by accident then is like “oscar wouldn’t cry if i said that to him?? i dont get why you’re upset?” for him he just bullies his friends and he considers her his best friend so he thinks he can pick on her but it genuinely upsets her

oscar def looks very soft and gentle. girlies would be like “are you sure you want him?? like have you had sex yet?” and suddenly she’s gushing about how good he is in bed like thank god you asked!! let me tell you allll about it. and then he gets a full green flag

they def think smth is off w charles, they think he’s not gonna stay around. he’s got a fast paced life and a string of short term relationships and she’s the first one to last a substantial amount of time. they’re waiting for the other shoe to drop, him to fall out of love and leave her, cheat on her, stop being a perfect prince charming. they’d definitely find things wrong with him, mostly how often he’s away and how they don’t get much time together, or say he’s trying to isolate her from them when he invites her out to a string of races and she’s gone for weeks at a time traveling with him.

they would be sooo confused about max because he would zone out while meeting her friends, they start talking about shopping and he starts staring at the wall behind one of her friends and looks so grumpy then his girl grabs his hand under the table and his face softens instantly and he grins as he looks over to her, lifts their intertwined hands and presses a kiss to each of her fingers then the back of her hand. he’d keep doing cute little things like that then staring off and looking grouchy. she has to explain that’s just his thinking face in the groupchat when everyone asks why he looked so annoyed for the entire lunch. they’d have definitely snuck pics and send them in the group chat like babe hes soo angry why are you with him?? and she sends back the cutest candids of him. sends videos of him carrying his cats around like babies and speaking to them in a baby voice. that convinces them and they’re still a little wary and waiting for her to call crying about him being an asshole, but the call never comes.

carlos is a green flag when they see his pics and then they meet him and they’re all begging him to leave him but she won’t bc she loves him

i’d like to add that danny is an instant green flag and they’re all asking if he has brothers or australian friends he can introduce them to. they all love him from the first meeting and are like, okay when is the wedding??

#ask #lifeboredme #ln4 #op81 #mv1 #cl16 #cs55 #dr3

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stupidrant · 8 months

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RANT INCOMING!

I have to talk abt this as this has been in my mind for months and this i think is the only safe space to talk abt the fandom and their weird antics towards the characters/actors and overall games.Im not against criticism but theres a line between criticizing and going overboard with hating.

One thing i dont understand abt the god of war fandom is that they complain about alot of things not being “accurate” and thats doesnt make sense to me bc when has gow ever been accurate? I thought it was obvious from the beginning that SMS wasnt going for that and never truly will. Its always their own interpretation. They also have this weird hatred / ignorance towards atreus that i also dont understand? Yea he was a little annoying in the first game but thats understandable as hes… a kid. Ragnarok expanded his character pretty well imo and i feel like alot of these people for some reason cannot get past him in general? Maybe because they are afraid of him taking over the series and “forgetting” kratos (idk why thats in their minds LOL) or they just hate him just because. I feel like the fandom wants kratos to forever be this god who destroys things and whatnot and its all so weird. like they never gave him a chance. thankfully he has fans but majority hates him. Dont even get me started on how they treat angrboda. Its really so ridiculous to me that they can be so hateful for no true reason. they call her a bitch for yelling at atreus when all the women in the game get annoyed or disappointed in him atleast once. And they dont understand that she has only known this prophecy shit for her whole life and she couldnt do anything outside bc of the threat. ofc shes angry bro LOLL its also in her name like i dont understand 😭. Atreus helps her get out of that mindset and assures her she can do whatever she wants now. Laya is so strong idk how she does it :( I also noticed they treat thrud as this “replacement” of angrboda bc they dont like her either cuz shes black or bc they hate her and everything related to atreus but as long as he has a character they can like thats not angrboda its fine. Its all so weird bc theres no competition between the two. There never was. I dont think they actually like thrud for her character they just want to be weirdos and i feel kinda bad for her and mina bc they really dont give a fuck. Im so shocked chris sunny and others even INTERACT with this bullshit of a fandom they are all really strong bc id say fuck all of you and go 😭 im not against criticism at all and i try not to take this shit seriously but its hard when you see a insane group of people take alot of this shit to the next level. this fandom is a bunch of whiny babies who hold onto their precious destroyer too much. The hate everyone has gotten recently is just so stupid and they often times try to make it their goal to hate. I see that SMS is trying to diverge their fandom to a broader audience and they are taking a bit more risks esp with atreus and i love that despite the backlash against him, they continued with his character regardless. I hope they do the same thing with the other characters as well and expand them no matter how much these people want to hate and act all high and mighty. I can understand certain critiques like the ending being too fast or maybe they couldve done blah blah better and whatnot but i think alot of people are overreacting and being ridiculously nitpicky with alot of things when it comes to ragnarok.

Last thing and also kinda random thing SMS is very wrong for what they did to TC Carson and i acknowledge that completely and i hope they never do smth like that to any of the current cast either bc i would be fucking pissed if so LOL

#God of war #god of war fandom #Gow #kratos #Atreus #angrboda #freya #thrud #thor #sif #yall are some fucking assholes #fandom #bullshit #gowr #god of war ragnarok #my stuff

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hot-girls-favorite-is-daniel · 3 months

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Conversation between me & my friends (slightly edited) as six the musical incorrect quotes:

Anna *watching Hazbin Hotel w the gang*: wait so the god of hell, first demon ever there is French…? so what does that tell us about French people?

Kat: wait….

Anne: I’m right here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anna: it’s kinda bright

Kat: not really ??? Anna: well that’s because I have blue eyes and you have brown eyes so the world is brighter for me so therefor I’m happier

Kar: probably true

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anne: *on her Snapchat story* I love u Mr.Beast, I want u forever n ever, no one can take you away from me

Kathy: Anne it is 7 am are you mentally okay?

Anne: yeah I just really love Mr.Beast

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kat: *in the queens gc* GUYS

guys

wake up

hello?

HELP I JUST FLASHED MY BISTLE WHISTLE AT MY DEAD GRAMMA!!!!

Lina: …Kat it is 7:15 in the fucking morning what the fuck fin you mean by you “flashed your bistle whistle at your dead gramma”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mary: *from the other side of the house* BITCH-

Kat: you know I’m sexy UGH don’t call just text me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elizabeth: *paragraph long rant about annoying kid at school and why they don’t wanna be friends anymore but aren’t sure*

Anna: also an erection is when your d#ck gets hard

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

H#nry: YOUR CHEATING ON ME. ?!?!?!?

Kat: Girl you added me to a group chat with all of your wives :|

(This one was not edited btw 🤭)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anne: I love my family and all but one time I said I hate Sheldon from Young Sheldon and they asked why.

Jane: haha. Wait why?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elizabeth: ugh fuck

Anne: THAT IS A BAD FUCKING WORD AND I WILL NOT FUCKING TOLERATE YOU SAYING THAT SHIT

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anne: how was school today?

Kat: I told someone to shut the fuck up today so I’m very proud of myself because that took some confidence

Anne: good for you :D

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anna: *in gc* my gramma doesn’t know how to text very well… (very misspelled weird autocorrect one thing said I will bite you for some reason ??)

Jane: oh god, I hope she doesn’t bite you ???

Anne: I hope she does.

Lina: what is wrong with you now I have a mental image of Anna’s gramma biting her arm

Anne: omg Jeffery Dahmar core 😝

Jane: okay that’s a bit much….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (All these quotes are from the same friend the same day but imaging the queens saying this is so funny to me)

Lina: Jesus is actually so hot…

Kat: Nooo Mr.Beast is my POOKIE

Anna: you know who’s hot… *image of Nick Avacado*

Anne: no, the hottest is Freddy Fazbear, if I was crying child I would have kissed Freddy IMMEDIATELY!!!!

Kathy: what about golden Freddy?

Anne: mwah mwah mwah

Kat: what about spring trap?

Anne: I want his trap

everyone: WHATTTT

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anne: what if I drove the hours to your country and pulled up outside you house(castle?) and walked in and said “it’s so preppy in here” what would you do then?

Lina: …..where do you even come up with this stuff?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kat: *while Anna is sleeping* RAPUNZEL RAPUNZEL ,ET DOWN YOUR LONG EYEBROWS……OH WAIT….YOU DONT HAVE ANY

Anna: …….why is there someone outside my window

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~…

Jane: why are you the way that you are?

Anne: because I drank the among us potion at exactly 3 am, I got it from the dark web, and supposedly when I drink the among us potion at 3 am I turn into the imposter from among us

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mary: *post the among us potion video with the title “go hang out with your younger sibling: the younger sibling:*

Jane: *replying to story* Oh no! What happens when you drink the potion?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*the queens in the car*

Lina: hey siri Text Jane that’s good to hear COMMA hope you are doing well PERIOD

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kat: who would you say is the bullied one out of this group???

Mary: you.

Kat: haha 🙂 fair 🙂

(also the queens all know fnaf lore now bc I said so it doesn’t fit them I just need them too)

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ohthemis · 2 years

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I don't know if I've even sent this ask but what if vyn cheats on rosa/reader. Sorry for the bother

— collateral damage

character: vyn richter a/n: tw: cheating // do all vyn stans have an innate craving for angst? because these requests, man, they’re something else. keep them coming though, i’ll see what i can do for u <3 disclaimer though, this is totally ooc for vyn. i dont think he’d ever cheat on a partner no matter how unhappy he is in a relationship. (omg i love writing angst, it used to be the only thing i wrote on my old blog until i stopped being 🖤🦇🥀⛓ emo girl, also this is dialogue heavy) sypnosis: unhappiness brings out the worst in people. unfortunately for vyn, so does guilt.

vyn wasn’t happy. for a long time he knew he wasn’t happy with you. it was the small things first. the way he didn’t find your quirks cute anymore, just plain old annoying. then, the fighting started. the way he didn’t care to deal with any more of your bullshit, or you in general, if he was being honest.

so when you two fought, he took a drive. he drives to the nearest club. he doesn’t know where he wanted to go, but frankly, as long as it was away from you, it was good enough.

and when he finds himself in the arms of someone, someone who didn’t resemble you, someone who wasn’t anything like you. he’ll tell himself he was just drunk, that it meant nothing. but he knew what it was, he just wanted the easy way out of your relationship.

and for a while after that, it was good. you apologize to him, smiling, while he tries to hide his stained shirt. you make dinner while he tries to wash lipstick off his shirt.

for a moment, it sets in. he keeps his mouth shut, though. he keeps it shut because what can he do? tell you? ruin everything when it was finally getting good?

but as fate would have it, vyn was a weak man. he loses himself to desire and he loses himself to regret.

“i saw someone that night when we fought.”

“what?”

“i’m sorry, i just needed to tell you. it wasn’t right to keep it to-”

“it’s not right to keep it a secret but making out with some bitch after a petty argument is?”

“i’m already being honest with you! what do you want me to do?”

“i don’t fucking know, vyn? what do you want from me? you think i should be on my knees and thanking you for telling me you cheated on me?!”

“god, mc-”

“was it good?”

“what?”

“was she a good kisser? was she pretty? did she look at you like she loved you for so long she starts to forget her name when you look her in the eye? because, fuck, vyn, i did! i put everything into this, into loving you. and it’s so unfair because it’s like you don’t care at all.”

“mc, i was drunk and upset. it’s not any excuse but-”

“no it’s not! it’s not an excuse, vyn! so what does it matter? because you think that the thought of you drunk and making out with some bitch is making the situation any better? i know you vyn. when you’re drunk, i know that you know what you’re doing. i’m just collateral damage right? you’re just sad because you don’t have that chick and now you don’t have me either.”

“i didn’t even know her!”

“and i’m supposed to be happy about that?”

“fuck, i don’t know?”

“you think i’m going to be happy that you were willing to mess around with whoever gave you the time of day, not after a few minutes away from me? fuck you vyn. i fucking hate you so much.”

“i’m sorry”

“that doesn’t change anything.”

you walk out of the door. you don’t know where you’re going, but frankly, as long as it was away from him, it was good enough.

vyn sits there desolate and exhausted. tears were streaming down his face, and the sheer desperation doesn’t quite reach the breaking point. he wants to chase after you, to beg, to tell you he was wrong, he was the one who ruined everything, but what difference would it make? you were well aware.

the room is so devoid of life, the only last remnants of it being his broken sobs and the occasional drop of tear on the carpet.

#can you tell i like dialogue?#wooooo #Tears of Themis #tears of themis x reader #tot #tot x reader #vyn richter #tears of themis vyn #vyn x reader #mo yi x reader #Mo Yi

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common-grackle · 3 months

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hello i am here to tell you about my best friend alice dyer magnusprotocol .

so she is working at thje oiar office of incident assessment and response which is like. magnus institute part two. or something. she has this ex boyfreind called samama khalid (i love him <3) and thjey are also besties and she got him the job at the oiar and in the 1st episode she shows him how to do things adn shes so silly abiut it shes likw . hold on let me screenshot thje fucking. the transed cript

dont look at my tabs .

anywya colin is the it guy and hes so babygirl literally,, this isnt abt him though its about alice

alice shows sam the gay people on the windows 95 ALSO SHE NAMED EVERYTHING WHICH. FUCK YEAH I DO YHIS like the system thjey use on the old ass computers. it doestn have a name but also his name is freddie . because fr3-d1 . and she also named thje voices that the compiters read out statements(??) in she named them norris chester and augustus (i am so normal about norris and chester . however if i told you WHY that woudl spoil tma for you + idk maybe youvw already had it spoiled adn seen things about them . or you dont care . either way its a story for another time anyway) alice often gets scolded by gwen bouchard who is . also working there and also shes hot. who said that uhh yes alice loves to annoy her and also gwen is so interesting to me but THATS A STORY FOR ANOTHER TIME !!!!! umm what else what else REMEMBER COLIN okay this is going to be a little bit about colin . he fucking . hes such a character. ok like he Knows somwthjing is wrong ?? like he can Tell . like the way the first tmagp episode ends is . interesting . to say the least . hes probably had a fucked up fear encounter . hes even scottish . and um thjeres a bit in the first episode when sam talks to him and its so silly becausw sam is like "hey colin how is the app going" and colin is like "THIS APP KILLED MY GRANDMA ))):< " or something . not that but like he got angyr You Get It and sam is like "oh my bad. i mso sorry alice told me to ask ." and colin is immediately like ". oh . (: ok then :D tell alice it was funny adn i laughed :smiling face with three hearts emoji: " LIKE . he hates everyone except alice <33 i lovw thjem so much ): AND WE SEE TJEM INTERAC T IN THE THIRD EPISODE . I LOVE THEM SO MUCH . AUGH . ummm augh the fucking conversation with sam and colin was so funny too sam is so awkward . poor boy anyway umm what else what else . YEAH UMMM AS A LOT OD PEOPLE HAVE OOINTED OUT. ALICE IS AWFULLY SIMILAR TO TIM STOKER MAGNUSARCHIVES FROM LIKE SEASON 1 . AND LIKE . god tim makes me feel shrimp emotions UMM LIKE IN SEASON ONE HES BEINGG LIKE REALLY FUNNY AND EVERYTHING . IN S2 HE LIKE. he starts getting a bit angry at everything because things have Really started to Go Wrong at the institute and also jon is being a little bitch . and at the end of s2/beginning of s3 he like . ok so theres anothjer archival assistant in like s1/s2(??) there her name is sasha and she and tim were best friends <333 some people ship them romantically some dont but either way. they were so so close and loved each other so much adn like they always come together like yk what i mean like you cant think of one of them without thinking of the other . thats how Two Of Them they were and i love them so much and augughghgh anyway ummmmm at the end of season 1 something . happens to sasha ! and its just ! not addressed until the end of s2 but like she starts acting different and everything and at the end of s2 we like learn that sasha fucking died bcause she was eaten by the not!them which is this thing thats with the fear entity known as the stranger . and um . basically it eats people and takes their place and almost no one can tell the difference like it alters everyone's memories and all the pictures and things of that person but like theres always like one or two people that can tell that it's a . whole other person . because they remember the way the real person used to be like the not!them appears in episode 3 across the street and eats this guy graham folger (love him) and amy patel (the statement giver) like remembers what og graham was like before the not!them got him yk . and in sasha's case it was this girl melanie that remembered her (i love melanie she is this youtuber she has a show called ghost hunt uk and she and jon hate each other and Cannot take each other seriously its so funny) anyway melanie was like "hgirllie that is not. sasha i?? are there two sashas" when jon assures her that sasha let her inside after she asked abt where sasha was . yk . and then jon does Researc h

i ran out of characters for this block wait

AND HE FUCKING FINDS WHAT SASHAS REAL VOICE SOUNDED LIKE BECAUSE THE NOT!THEM CANT FUCK WITH THE OLD ASS CASSETTE TAPE RECORDERS . YK and thjen he accidentally. Releases the not them into the wild lmao but um thats a whole other story the point is we learn that sasha was not. sasha . yk anyway back to tim . s3 is so bad for him and he gets like fucking . depressed . now like theres the one whole thing with sasha (thjeres this one bit where hes like "i dont even know who im sad for" UUGHGHGHGHGH) BUT ALSO we learn that the stranger also got his younger brother danny !!! traumatizing fucking experience also why is the stranhger targeting Him Specifically . one of the reasons i hate the stranger its fucking EVIL also tim hates jon now ! and he has reason to anyway um . tim is fucking . hes Sad and going through all the stages of grief aND HE DOESNT EVEN FUCKING FINISH . BECAUSE HE DIES . IN THE UNKNOWING . well trying to stop it . and UUUHUHHGHJGHJHGHJHGJHGJHJHJKJHBGHJKJHJKJHGJKJHJJHNJKJHBJKJHBMKJHBJNMKJHBJHB a bit more on this topic when jon goes to get jonah magnus' ass in s5 he like fucking sits him down adn just like fucking goes "that was for tim" "that was for sasha" AND I WAS HHDHSMDSHJDSM and then the fucking "i dont want to die" "neither did they" I AUAYUGYUHFGJHHGCFJNKNHFGVGBHJNFGH AND DONT GET ME FUCKING S T A R T E D ON THE BIRTHDAY TAPE. anyway. um. dear god how did i get from alice to this . anyway . um . YES alice reminds us so much of tim and she even has a younger brother.,,, but yes she reminds us so much of timWHICH MAKES ME SO FUCKING. WORRIED. IM GOINg TO RUN INTO MY WALL AT FULL SPEED i am so worried :thumbsup: anyway. um. uh. this was it i think i am hgoing to go play bideo games now goodbye and remember that bones are a lie peddled by big milk to keep you buying

HKDSBKJFBMNVSDJFKDBKFJH INSANE. HI

"one of the reasons i hate the stranger its fucking EVIL" is a rly good sentence

ugh i kinda want to listen to tma now. yuor fault. affectionate

ANYWAYYYY augh tragedy fans when the tragedy tragedies

UM. this was rly good and fun to read. i dont have like. words to say about the content. but YEAG BLORBOS IN LAW YOU GO 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

#YUORE THE REALEST EVER FOR THIS THANKYOU <33333333 #ILY ART. COOLEST EVER #tma spoilers #<- should probably tag that yeah?

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walkcycle · 1 year

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genuine question abt ur bio.. whats wrong w little women? idk anything abt it :0 hope u have a good day!!

yes... what IS wrong w little women? in short it annoys me. i find it annoying. when i have to talk to little women lovers i start to go crazy and insane like that post about going on youtube without adblocker and turning into the riddler. i find the way most people discuss little women to be at best dick sucking levels of critical thinking (meaning none. they are just sucking dick) which whatever that's your business. but i love patterns and thinking and ripping books up so it does not work for me. mainly what i think is wrong w little women: people still talk about it. stop making movie adaptions stop WATCHING these movies adaptions stop it just stop it !!!!

little women well reading it you have fun. or i had fun. and the reason i had fun is because i have a parasocial relationship with louisa may alcott and i justknow she was a hater and i DO know she hated little women (this is because she is dead and you can just read her diary). but unfortunately other people that read little women and had fun well they don't have this insane girl bond with alcott so they aren't haters. alcott thought the concept for the book was boring and she only turned to writing it after facing critical failure with previous works. by critical failure i don't mean failure of critical levels i just mean critics did not like it. critics read moods and were like wow alcott you should try to unlearn the written word this sucks and she was like ok go fuck yourself what if i wrote the most boring shit on earth kill yourself and that's what makes reading little women fun the whole thing is double speak you know with every sentence alcott is mocking the entire book and the views presented in it she hated women she was like god this sucks.

alcott did not view the book as progressive she was having to include all kinds of shit... that book was about a household centered around a man and written to mirror books like pilgrims progress (pilgrims progress is this christian allegory like how narnia is about christianity like that only not fun). after it became popular she had to pull back on literally all the fun stuff in it bc she was so hateful and annoyed towards her fans she was like god can you all SHUT UP? just for that everyones lives are going to be miserable just for that im going to write the worst endings on earth for these little bitches and then she did and giggled with her friends about it

ok i lost my main point. my main point abt america just never shutting the fuck up about little women. to me these people just dont get it they literally dont theyre like wow little women...... feminist book about women written by a woman....... this is soooo great we should keep talking about these white women for the rest of all time like omg they literally had servants. be real. but people just continue to praise it without having anything of substance to say like ok girl can we move on can we talk about other books why are we stuck in the white women jogging track just walking around and around can we get out of here. people use little women and its impact on american culture as an excuse to just keep circling around white women it is literally 2023 can we talk about something else. little women fans are just insufferable to me they're trapped in this little women loop where because little women is "progressive" (i have other thoughts about this too) they never have to consider works by other groups of minorities and they never have to consider if theres anything fucked up and twisted about or being mainlined by its narrative. little women is an insincere book and its thematic messages are also insincere and if you read it knowing this then you can become an insane crazy guy like me and then i would loveeee to talk about little women with you. but unfortunately no one is doing this

#asks #yes im a hater. its very complex.#yes this post is incoherent. yes im still right. lots of moving parts here #i used to go on long winded rants about little women i used to call my sister and just be like i NEED to be a hater. can i be a hater #diary entry #little women #ive been reminded now of the time i used to be completely insane about this i might just start ranting and raving about little women now #yaaaaay thank you for sending a cute little ask and reading my tumblr about page i love you forever <3 #if you want to know anything ever just ask me i love to talk etc. sorry if this does not make any sense at all

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attourney-at-lycan · 2 years

Note

OKOK hello again but i saw ur jesson post and OH MY GOOD GOLLY GOSH umm i think i shall add some forewarnings because this is alot and i didnt realise i wrote this much , the absolute biggest apologies i just love ur blog alot and sorry again ( yea i just talk abt grooming, the 14/15 -18 yr old dynamic and mentions in the pictures of jess talking and implying that canon aph and aaron at their ages getting sexual)

i literally have been doing just semi deep dives on their irl past because it helps explain smamsmsm of what we get in canon bith for MCD + Mystreet like its actually insane

whether its the whole freshman (14/15 yr old) with a repeating senior (= LITERALLY 18 BECAUSE SENIOR YEAR IS 17-18 SO HE MUSTVE HIT HIS 18TH BDAY OH MY GOD) its just jesson EVEN with the whole military school + meeting online AS WELL AS JASON because i hate him so much because ages ago i was doing a deep dive on his twitter because he's him /neg and its crazy... liek i dont know how to articulate it well but u can just see how abhorrent he is as a person for not only pursuing jess irl when he was abg to go into college and she was still in high school . i have some pics

LIKE ? if u want to display ur self insert ocs repationship (which OBJECTIVELY is disgusting as the age gap at 14/15 and 18 is fucking just wrong) like dont get mad at people for wanting CANON aph to not be with CANON aaron because ?3!,&39.&;£ JUST BECAUSE U WROTE IT TO BE A PERSONIFICATION OF UR GUYS DISGUSTING IRL RELATIONSHIP AND THE PORTRAYED IT AS HEALTHY ROMANTIC HIGH SCHOOL LOVERS DOES NOT MEAN THAT PEOPLE CANT FUCKING CRITICISE IT hjsbzjsjd

and and like CHILDREN LITERAL PRE TEENS are watching and being influenced by this age gap seeing it as romantic and goals, then go pursue this fantasized gross thing and LIKE ARE GROOMED BECAUSE ITS CRAZY to display that age gap as healthy ?37;8:&/

im sorry that this is so heated but as someone who literally thought they were absolute goals when i was younger it just makes me sick because i was so lucky my dumb non american 10 year old self didnt know what a sophomore or freshman was and didnt get their ages but others weren't

i have seen PEOPLE talk about how they saw pdh aarmau and thought it was okay and recount their grooming and abuse they experienced because fiction affects reality and thats what happens when u as a creator choose to display that in a healthy and idealised light

tldr : i hate jesson vehemently with a passion and their portrayal of hate on their aarmau as mean trollers is fucking annoying because it wouldve been so easy to just not have a 14/15 yr old and 18yr old shown as romantically involved but no they had to because its a personification of their irl selves and thus is shielded from criticism ...?

tw grooming and age gap

this makes me absolutely fucking sick. i feel bad for jess for being put in that position at a young age but putting it out there for literal children and pre-teens to see is different. because you are influencing them to believe this should be normal. i literally had a debate with someone who defended aarmau in pdh bc “it was normal at the time” a week ago.

and yeah, when you make yourself and your partner a character, make money off people consuming said characters, you lose any right to keep ppl from criticizing and from being ‘possessive’ over said character. sorry jesson you cannot have the best of both worlds.

ALSO JASON BEING “yeah it’s so sad that my wife is acting out being in romantic situations with block characters :(“ then maybe??? just dont??? do it? you guys chose to make aphmau and aaron personifications of yourselves so you shouldn’t be bitching about shit like this.

#i hope this make sense if it doesn’t im rlly sorry #i have a hard time putting a coherent argument together #aphmau #tw grooming #tw age gap

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fecesmachine · 1 year

Text

Antipathy Pt 1.

Hai hello hai

sorry if this is too short my first time writing this type of stuff, more coming soon this is just to establish and flesh out y/n

Wednesday Addams x Male reader

TW: Foul language? Slight Angst...

Antipathy: A deep-seated feeling of dislike; aversion.

Ruben had always been on the fence about sending you here, and you weren't very eager to go here either, you were fine at regular school… yeah most people would baby you like you had retardism or something. always speaking to you like you were some fragile being, like you could burst into tears if they had said something wrong or in the wrong tone of voice

It made you cringe, and it made you angry.

But other than that you were fine. News about what your mother did spread quickly throughout your town, everyone was shocked when they heard about it, and everyone had felt pity towards You…

it sucked. You hated it… You hated the attention, You hated the over display of pity, you hated the pity...

You were genuinely surprised when you heard the news. You had just got back to your house, sweaty from riding your bike around your town and from the massive heat wave it was getting. you had just put your bike away in your garage.

exhausted and with a mighty thirst you walk to the kitchen for a glass of water after you fill the cup up you turn around to head to your room when you suddenly see Ruben sitting down near the counter. "We need to talk y/n" you had gotten a bit worried, Ruben had always had positive tone in his voice but this time he had sounded serious. "okay… what's up" Ruben paused for a minute and then sighed...

“I'm sending you to nevermore y/n…"

you paused for a second "What? wait, wait, wait, why? I'm fine here". You said back.

"y/n…" Ruben said while looking at you with pursed lips, "Really I am!" you said while putting on a fake, awkward smile…

"Y/n I know you… cmon, itll be good for you, you can finally meet some friends and people who you relate to…” you look at him with a confused expression as he was finishing his sentence.

"Somewhere where you can finally fit in…" Ruben said.

"Wait... Is that all your doing this for? to help me "fit in" somewhere? Im perfectly fine with not "fitting in" anywhere, Ruben" You chuckled a bit... at the stupidity of Rubens reasoning.

"Well no, not just to fit in y/n... im worried man... about your abilities… they can hurt people if your not careful, I was thinking Nevermore can help you control them and your emotions…" Ruben said this all a bit hesitantly.

Your not a cocky person, your humble and dont make a big deal out of your achievements and whatnot... but Ruben knows one thing you do take alot of pride in... Your abilities, youve always seen yourself as a master at controlling them, your mom always told you to be proud of them, so proud you are... and you take controlling them very seriously.

"oh my god..." you said a bit frustrated...

"what so now you dont trust me? you think ill hurt somebody? ive told you 800 goddamn times I can control them Ruben" You were actually starting to get upset.

Your talents and skills over your abilities are being questioned and you were seriously getting offended.

"I know youve been dealing with bullies… im just worried they would cross a certain line and you would snap" Ruben said with a calm voice.

There was a sudden, awkward silence that filled the room.

"Who told you?" You said in a sudden shift in tone...

Ruben stayed silent and just looked at you, you started to understand now…

"oh, oh you son of a bitch"

Ruben was about to say something when you cut him off.

"Youve been watching me havent you?" You never liked Ruben stalking you.

he would only do it to make sure you were safe but it felt degrading to you... Having to be watched at all times, like you were some toddler... you had always enjoyed his company (to an extent) but when you just wanted to be alone, it was annoying…

After some time of you constantly spotting and pointing him out...you asked him to stop and he made a promise that he would…

It was strange... how could you have not noticed him? You always do, why haven’t you noticed him now?

"for how long, Ruben?" you said with an angry, sharp tone... you were just so angry that you cant have a few moments of peace without being chaperoned by someone.

"Just recently, for some reason I just got so worried about you y/n..." his still surprisingly calm and soothing voice actually calmed you down for a second...then made you angrier and hate his voice even more now. How hes able to effortessly mangle, mix and switch your feelings around, and just with his voice... that annoying, cheerful, familiar voice... you wanted to get away from him, you didnt want to hear Rubens voice... you didnt want to see him.

"You made a promise Ruben..." You exclaimed

"I know, I know, I just wanted to keep you safe" Ruben said frustrated

Silence filled the room…

you suddenly shifted your entire body and stormed off to your room without saying another word…

You were gonna go to nevermore... If it meant getting away from Ruben, you were sick and tired of him, you gave him so many chances…

For the first time in a very long time.

you truly wanted to stay away from Ruben…

#nevermore #nevermore academy #male reader #wednesday #wednesday x male reader

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ssreeder · 2 years

Note

okay so this is leekie (hiiii) and here’s my comment bc ao3 is being a bitch and cut me off:

SREEDYYHY MY LOVE I MISSED YOU *picks you up and shakes you around like I’m making a cocktail using fancy bar equipment*

ZUKO MY BBY HES ALIVE AND WELL

n o. sokka my love Do Not tempt fate you and zuko WILL BE BOTH SAFE AND HAPPY AND ALIVE AT THE SAME TIME you’re probably just going to suffer a bit more before that happens…

ahh sokka with his achy hands.. we don’t want our boy getting arthritis before he’s even 18 </3

YAY sokka’s getting his insatiable appetite back, nature truly is healing (even tho ZUKO YOUR FUCKING MORON EAT YOUR STEW)

dad-chief and fatherlord buddies lmao

ohoho shen with his fire nation knowledge about fire nation hair and fire nation intimacy ;)))

“the teen was incredibly skilled at concealing his emotions” my oh my how we have Evolved from dramatic ass zuko in the show.. it’s depressing.

okay I’m interested in knowing about how you’re depicting cultural differences actually. like hakoda thinks that zuko looking him in the eye is a sign of respect bc that’s swt culture, but (at least I thought) isn’t it respectful to not look authority in the eye?? in which case, absolutely fucking iconic that zuko is being a defiant little shit and hakoda is like “what a polite young man :)”

“that’s why we risked it all” OHOHO WE DO LOVE A SNEAKY LITTLE TITLE REFERENCE

okay wait I lowkey love the zuko and shen dynamic it’s legendary

lmao not hakoda finding out katara purposefully got herself imprisoned

“why are you arguing with me?”

“because you are fucking stupid”

way to make a new friend zuko <3

OH NOOO SHEN DONT ASK WHY ZUKO KNOW WHAT THE CAPTAINS QUARTERS LOOK LIKE I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD

nooooo katara your father is very much being a father to your very much not dead brother don’t be saaaaaad

bruh imagine if jet had been allowed in the war meeting that would’ve been an entire fucking mess omg

why is reho talking about sex it feels so wrong bc he’s such an innocent little fool.. omG ACE REHO??? i love this for him

oh no jet trauma :((

FUCK we’re gonna have a zukka and jet confrontation aren’t we

*moment of silence for boots*

yeahhh we’re getting a zukka and get confrontation.

ik this is going to evolve into a Bad argument but it’s hilarious that zuko of all people is the one lecturing sokka about having a short temper (also, something something taking on each other’s traits parallels something something)

wheezing at jet discovering that zuko is the blue spirit omfg FUCKING HELL REHO DONT SPILL THE BEANS ABOUT ZUKO BEING A PRINCE DO YOU ACTUALLY HAVE DISHSOAP FOR BRAINS

holy shit reho whyyyyyyy

ah yes sokka when if doubt, tackle the love of your life so that you can annoy them into expressing their trauma

I swear to fucking god sreeder if you having zuko run away from the camp I will hunt you down

jet. jfc. this boy. needs to be put on a leash.

also FUCK the dai li, the dai li can EAT SHIT

ALSO jet and ara parallels???? earth kingdom nonbenders with immense trauma who send a message to an evil big boss man to tattle on where zuko is hiding????

LEEKIE!!!!

*hoping I make a delicious cocktail*

Ughhhh Zuko is starting to feel better which means some of his dramatic flare may return….

Haha Zuko & Shen have a weird dynamic of “I fucking hate you” but “we get along for brief moments”

Everyone thinks Zuko in Zhaos quarters is all depressing & yeah it kind of is but I’m pretttttyyy sure it’s only because he and Iroh had tea there many times. lol

Yay for ace Reho he deserves nice things sometimes.

Yeahhhhhhhhh…. Confrontation is on the horizon, so you see it? I see it.

(Something something you’re onto something like always)

Zuko is a flight risk, someone tie him to something, ignore his trauma. Lock him down.

*claps* omggg yessss!! Ara & Jet parallels all day, they are two peas in a pod and 85% of the readers HATE that pod.

Love you very much sorry it took me a million years to get back to you. <3

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i-just-want-to-destroy · 2 years

Note

allen walker for the character ask, please. I'm very curious to hear what your thoughts are, if you don't mind

awesome!

send me a character and i’ll list:

favorite thing about them oh my god everythiiiiing hes SUCH a good character! hes my FAVORITE MC TROPE a guy who seems so sweet and so nice but is actually very fucked up inside and SURPRISINGLY manipulative like hes charming because HE WANTS TO BE??? holy shiiiiiit. the blueprint for me!!! no mc has ever done what he did ever since

least favorite thing about them nothing hes peak fiction

favorite line very early in the series where he met crowley at the first time and he was like "haha dont kill urself killing monsters can be your reason to live :)!!!!" or something like that. he said it so sincerely like as if he thinks its a fucking normal mindset to have because this is HIS own mindset because hes literally crazy

brOTP kanda and him. MY blueprint. like :) >:/ pairing. this is my favorite dynamic forever. the contrasting ideologies the fire and ice of it all literally theyre the IT duo. i also love him w the rest of the cast :)) him and lenalee omg i need to see them together again 😭😭😭 him and lavi too.. theyre the brotp4 fr. him and johnny! him and LINK! hes great with everybody.

OTP idc

nOTP idc

random headcanon very artistic :))) in another life he wouldve been an artist, a performing one. likes sentimental stories. its been established that hes good at tricks, i think hes the kind of person whos good at random shit, like a true jack of trades-- like he'd trying doing something and got it right on the first try and then he goes "im just lucky :)" because hes annoying like that. given the chance he would be able to play every musical instrument. he would've enjoyed comic books as well, i really believe that.

unpopular opinion its been such a long time since i was active in dgm fandom (if i was even active at all) and since i read dgm fics but people should really write him meaner and faker hes the #1 fake bitch who is ALSO, at the same time, a genuinely good person with a good heart. the duality. hes literally the ideal mc the layers of him omg. like depicting him as naive is not wrong per se but like understand that whenever hes naive he CHOOSES to be naive. if u get it u get it

song i associate with them im not okay (i promise), the black parade, kill all ur friends, na na na yes yes the whole mcr treatment i dont give a fuck!!!! linkin park too like in the end, LEAVE OUT ALL THE REST,,, PARAMORES BRICK BY BORING BRICK....just 2010s rock treatment do you understand the vibe???!!!!!!!!!!

favorite picture of them the chokehold this pic has on me when i was in middle school like this was THE picture i loved this picture so much its in my 14 year old mind rent free

also this is my favorite hoshino art phase :)

#ask

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phoenixfangs · 1 year

Note

>:3c fandom askies for aa, depending on your Mood

Salty: 1, 8, 10, 25

Neutral: 16

Posi: 17, 18

JAJAJAJAJAJAJA pepper coming in clutch as always, and u KNOW im gonna do all of them, mood be damned. going under a readmore because i rambled!!

the character everyone gets wrong

maybe its a boring answer but phoenix. good god do people just Not understand him. i think the fact weve seen him in so many forms (feenie, trilogy, 7yg, aa5/6) makes it hard for people to get a pin on him, but thats the thing: u cant really get a pin on someone like that. too often i see stuff where, well into his thirties and having gotten his badge back, people portray him as just as outwardly emotional (and sometimes emotionally volatile...) as he was when he was dating dahlia, and Thats Simply Not The Case, especially after how guarded and jaded he became during aa4. hes SUCH a complicated character i cant even go into specifics and try to give other examples, because they each require paragraphs of their own explaining context and nuance in what goes through his head. i dont know how else to go on, just know that i am the only person who is correct about phoenix wright, and if anyone requires consultations for fic or art, my fee is steep but fair

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

all of them. no im kidding, uhhhhh hm. i guess that klavier and apollo Immediately knew they liked each other/were attracted to each other and spent any time pining for the others affection during aa4. i like klapollo as a ship, i just dont think klav teasing apollo with flirtation when they first meet means he was Seriously Flirting with apollo, i think its possible there was a base physical attraction but he was mostly just trying to get apollos goat for fun since he was a rookie attorney. and because of that, what reason does apollo have to be drawn to klavier? apollo isnt some stock tsundere, i think he probably was really annoyed by klavier and Didnt Like Him All That Much at first. plus, with aa4s story being what it is, i just dont think any romantic feelings are on either of their minds until well after the last case. with their ship, i like to imagine they start as professional adversaries (not rivals in the sense phoenix and miles are rivals, its a different vibe), then become friends, THEN graduate to exploring other feelings

10. worst part of fanon

all of it. no im kidding, the worst part of fanon is how rigidly people expect u to obey it. if u dont portray miles as a gay trans man, people look at u weird, for example. which isnt to say that its Bad to follow that fanon, obviously i also think hes gay (i dont personally headcanon him as trans though) but just that it is fanon. until we get concrete proof in a game or anime or what have u of miles demonstrating or naming his sexuality/gender expression, it is just as perfectly valid to portray him as a cishet man as it is to portray him as a gay trans man, even if i personally think its weird and impossible to imagine him with a girlfriend or something. its fine to have different interpretations of whatever; its Not fine to get mad at somebody because theyre not following fanon that u personally ascribe to

25. common fandom complaint that ur sick of hearing

'i dont read wlw content because its all the same :( why are all the mean lesbians getting so mad that my mlm ship is just better :( its not my fault those stupid broads arent written as well as my spicy yaoi :( what do u mean one half of my mlm ship is a lamp ur just being mean to a mlm because ur bitter that ur stupid bitches arent written as well as my mlm gay disaster babies :( stop bullying me for no reason u crazy psycho cunt this is why nobody gives a shit enough about ur dumbass wlw ship to make anything for it :('

obviously nothing wrong with mlm ships, i have been known to enjoy many mlm ships! but when a wlw (particularly a lesbian...) complains about the disproportionate amount of mlm fan content between characters who literally never spoke, stood next to each other once, or where one of them is literally Not A Character (clay terran is a prop i am not wrong about that), its SO FRUSTRATING to see the response be someone taking it as a personal attack and throwing the blame back out at wlw for not just shutting up and dealing with it. that post that showed among us had significantly more mlm fics over wlw fics on ao3 when Those Stupid Creatures Dont Even Have Gender/Character applies to like literally every other fandom

16. u cant understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc.)

any situation in which phoenix depends on miles for money during 7yg. similarly, royalty/medieval au where phoenix is some kind of servant to prince miles, and yes being a knight counts as being a servant in my mind. these two things feel wayyyyy imbalanced to me but in fanworks theyre portrayed as like necessary and appreciated by phoenix (in the money situation) or really romantic (in the royalty/medieval situation). idk, to me, phoenix would rather saw off his own arm and eat it than accept money, especially from miles, during 7yg, and if he did accept it it would only be because miles says 'let me do this for trucy then if ur gonna be so stubborn about it' and he Begrudgingly Agrees; with phoenix being miless knight, it just feels too much like people seeing phoenixs one-sided devotion to miles in aa1 and going 'this is normal and desirable behavior', and idk how to tell people this but phoenixs savior complex over miles is Not Good fjkdsjlfslak like it worked out for them but i dont think phoenixs behavior towards miles in aa1 especially is indicative of a well adjusted, emotionally stable person, and that hardly ever gets talked about its just 'wee wah hes soooo in luuuuurve isnt that romantic'

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art

siblingsssss there are so many good sibling pairs/groups in aa. also wlw ship stuff In General because there is never enough in any fandom. also also (because i love to kick the hornets nest) more fic where the intention is to Tell An Actual Story With The Characters instead of projecting the authors trauma and/or kinks and/or personality onto the characters where it doesnt fit ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

18. its absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

idk if krisnix counts as slept on because ive only been in the fandom for a couple years, i know things were different like 10-15 years ago and maybe it was more popular then, but. krisnix. jfkdsjfls. there is soooooooo much narrative drama u can cook up with these two, so many scenarios and angles, and uve got 7 whole years to fill!! and u can be as serious and somber as u want, going into mental health and toxic relationships and what it means to spend so much of ur life with someone who is so bad for u but letting go isnt easy because thats years of ur life with that person ur being asked to let go of, OR u can be silly and say that kristoph is christian grays lawyersona, because come on i dare anyone to try and tell me kristoph Isnt Also the worlds worst dom

#mine #THANK U PEPPER I KISS U ON THE MOUF #im sorry its so many words. fjkdlsjklf

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my-void-of-which-i-cry · 1 year

Text

everyone says im fucking annoying. maybe i am.

3/14/23

i tried being nice and being considerate. i dont want much i just wan someone to care and acknowledge me. im tired of being the stupid one, the one who has to consider ive tried so god damn hard to make it easy for you people but every thinf i do seems to annoy you i feel like every time i try to talk to you you start getting annoyed and maybe youre right and im spoiled and im a brat i wont do that anymore, i’ll try my god damn hardest to not leave a trace in this house . since being in your presence seems too much for you i try not asking for anything anymore. i’ll stop complaining i’ll keep everything to myself. you want that right? i wont be a bother anymore. iltt stop trying to care for you or beg for your praise and affection. i can look for it by myself. why is making a suggestion about my birthday such a big deal for you i can do whatever i want on “MY” birthday why does me talking about it piss you off. fine i wont celebrate my goddamn rbirth and iwont celebrate it again. i wont care anymore about whattever. ill be out of your way. im sorry im even alive and pullking you dfown and im such a waste of space and im an obese trash elepphant ‘who cant stop eating and whos spoiled and a bitch with no manners and cant do anything right i cant do anything at all and i should never have fucking existed i keep wishing that i nevere existed. every second of every day i wish you to be happy and to just let me not exist anymore.

i cant keep wishing because nothing ever fucking happens i wish i just died when i could, every near death experience i hope it killed me and i hope i never s here. i hate being in a place where everyone and everything i do is considered wrong and im always wrong and always bad and always a bitch whos spoiled and a child. i want to die. and its not a joke anymore. i just want someone to love me and understand that i make shit thats not good and that i dont always say the right things and that im always trying my best to be considerate. but being considerate is not enough for everyone. im already ugly and im already fat and stupid if i just died everyone would forget about me in a week and in a yer everything will be better for everyone becuase i am just a dumb rock thats a burden to them and if i go then my sister will have her oen room and all my parents love and they can finally give her the care she deserves. if i go D could finally be happy with her new friends and let go of our group to be herself. F and H will be fine . E and H and A will be too. im not a big part of their lives, C and A will have forgotten me by now. and my parents have one less problem now, they can focus on my sister, and after she moves out theyll be free from the horrible kid they have. ill be free from putting myself esteem as high as how others apreciate me. because everything i am is what evereybody else thinks of me. and im nothing no one will remember me in a year . i die now. i wish i died now i wish i just fell asleep and died. im so sorry to the people whos lives i disturbed i hope you guys will ignore all my shit and all the crap i put you through it must have been so so annoying. i wish i died back then. and i wish i die here and maybe i can gain enough courage this year. who knows i sure hope i do. i dont think i can handle life. to the new friends i made im sorry you had to put up with me . im really sorry mom and dad im sorry your second kid is a piece of shit who cant do anything and always humiliates you and annoys you .. i wish i wasnt here too and i wish i was dead so long ago. i hope truly one day i can finally go through with something and maybe thats the only thing i can get right..

0 notes

bukguhope · 2 years

Text

bad boy, good girl | pjm ~ one shot request ~

> "dont act like you dont feel like same", "fuck it", god why cant you just see that i love you?!", "you're mine, do i need to remind you?", "what do i need to do beg?", "be a good girl"

> enemies to lovers, badboy!jimin, angst, light smut, fluff, mature, jimin x f.reader

growing up you always had the same friendship group and you could say it - less then conventional. being friends with seven guys wasn’t really normal, but it was what you had and you were grateful. it made for a really fun childhood after all, never being made to follow tradition gender roles as you play outside and got messy as you played with them. and it stayed like this, all the way until university. some of the group had decided to go to different places and some went to the same. however, you all still lived in the same area and met often. but one thing did change, that being jimin. he was a such a cute little boy when you grew up together, always following you around offering you some flower he picked from the ground or a picture he drew just for you. but after he went of to a university, all on his own he met new people. and it was like he became a different person right in front of your eyes. piercings began to decorate his face, his fashion sense wasn’t the same and it got darker. he stopped playing sports he enjoyed and began to just hang around parties or clubs. but you stayed the same, always know as the happy go lucky good girl. you could never do no wrong, didn’t get in trouble at school and never had a bad word to say about anyone. even at university, you stayed the same. so kind and cheery. this might have been a little different if you never had jungkook by your side, he went to the same university as you did. he did a good job at reminding you of how you were raised, being one of your childhood friends it was easy to carry on being yourself even when surrounded in a new environment. but when it came to jimin, his style and hobbies weren’t the only thing that changed, the way he acted did. it started as teasing here and there that you laugh off, but slowly he got more annoying. like he wanted a reaction from, only you.

“when you gonna get some female friends y/n? never get guy time anymore” you stare at jimin in a hardened gaze. you were all having a nice time before he decided to open his mouth, something that happened a lot lately. you hadn’t even provoked him, you were start finishing you desert as you all you sat in the booth of your local diner. somewhere you all frequented since you were kids

“jimin stop, she hasn’t even done anything. plus she’s our friend” jungkook defends you and jimin scoffs, leaning back making the leather of his black jacket make a noise.

“oh and here comes saviour jungkook, always coming to y/n’s rescue” he mocks and the all the boys begin to roll their eyes and huff. they were beginning to get sick and tired of jimins attitude. you stayed quiet though, not wanting to take his bait as you once used to do

“bro leave her alone what has she done to you?” taehyung jumps in and jimins gaze whips to him in a flash, like acquiring a new target. of course he hadn’t though, his only target was you.

“it’s what she hasn’t done that’s the problem” jimin mumbles, confusing everyone at the table but he doesn’t elaborate any further. just pulls out his phone and ignores everyone at the table. everyone goes back to their conversations, trying to pretend that jimin wasn’t being a little bitch - to put it clinically.

“y/n” jungkook whispers next to you, trying not to draw the attention of everyone else at the table “did you wanna go back to the dorms? you don’t have to sit with him when he’s being like that” you give a small smile but don’t get the chance to reply

“try whispering quieter next time, iam sat opposite you dumbass” jimin mutters, not even looking up from his phone. jungkook grips the table before lashing out

“don’t fucking start with me jimin, what’s the deal with you?” he says through gritted teeth and the table grows quiet, all just watching the scene unfold.

“i don’t have a deal” jimin shrugs and you chuckle making the boys look to you, even jimin draws his attention from his phone to you “oh you have something to add to the conversation?”

“yeah you do have a deal, you’re a colossal asshole” you mumble and your friends have to suppress some laughter that wanted to bubble from their throats. except jimin, of course.

“really y/n? iam an asshole? sure you’re not scared of getting into trouble because of using a swear word in public?” he asks sarcastically and you narrow your eyes at him. you really couldn’t recognise the person your friend had become, he was once someone you were so close. he took your silence as motivation to continue “you realise you’re only here because our parents were friends when we were younger right? realistically you wouldn’t even be in this friendship group if it wasn’t for that so don’t get smart with me” shock. everyone was sat in shock, just looking at jimin but his gaze never drifted from you. after staring for a while, you knew tears were about to fall and you didn’t want him or anyone to see that.

“you know what, i don’t have to deal with this. fuck you jimin” you seethed standing as you collected your things and stormed out the diner. you thanked god that you were sat at the end of the booth, you wanted to be far away from there as soon as possible. jungkook was not far behind you, but the rest of the guys just stayed as they processed what just happened.

“too far” yoongi mutters before standing to leave and everyone followed, leaving jimin to sit at the booth by himself. he just casually stared out the window, hoping no one could see his stone cold expression falter.

three weeks later and you hadn’t attempted to get into contact with any of the boys, this being the longest you hadn’t spoke since you were children. you didn’t mean to take it out on them, when it was jimin who had upset you. but you couldn’t face them, especially after what he said. he was only friends with you because he had to be, and so did the others? deep down you knew that couldn’t be true, the friendships you had were genuine but you couldn’t help be paranoid after jimin’s words. jungkook had been all in your case for the past three weeks, with fact he knew exactly where your dorm was and he didn’t live far from it - it was hard to avoid him. but somehow you managed, you just ignored the constant knocks throughout the day and kept the lights off as he called for you from the other side of the door. everytime you felt awful but you really couldn’t see him yet, any of them.

“jimin you need to fucking find her and apologise, no ones seen her for almost a month” jungkook bangs his hand on the booth table to emphasise his point, making the other boys jump. but jimin doesn’t even look in his direction.

“why should i?” his brazen attitude was really starting to grate on everyone, to be honest even he was annoying himself. the thing with jimin was that he was so stubborn and it sometimes came to bite him on the ass. and his stubbornness only got worst when he met his other friend and university.

he only hung out with his newer crowd because he was on his own when he started university, none of his childhood friends coming to the same school as him made him more upset then he originally thought. plus, when he found out you had actually gotten into the same university as him but chose to run along with jungkook? his heart couldn’t help but break a little. he was so close to you growing up, he was like your little shadow. he followed you around like his life depended on it and when that was no longer an option, that version of jimin died and that’s how he found himself doing things he never saw himself ever doing.

“jimin it’s a lip piercing, grow the fuck up” doyoung says coldly as jimin shook slightly in the chair as the piercer got the equipment ready to give him a hole in his face. “after this we’re going to get drink, maybe hit some bars for sure”

“oh i don’t really like bars” his new friends just look at him and laugh, making him feel tiny. what was he doing? he thought to himself, this wasn’t like him. he had friends, better friends - so why was he clinging to these stupid boys like they were all he had. actually he should know exactly why. the morning of the day he found himself in that stupid place about to get a piercing, he came to your campus. to rant to you about how much he hated being alone, how much he wished you came to university with him and how the crowd he had fallen into was not for him. but when he reached your campus he just so happened to see you, running around the yard chasing jungkook - playing like you used to with him. it was childish really, to feel jealous that you were having fun with someone else. but the fact he knew you could’ve come with him but didn’t, he held it against you. so he stormed off and found himself getting a lip piercing a few hours later.

a year later, jimin found himself fully engulfed in his new persona. sleeping around, drinking and getting into fights. he didn’t even know himself anymore, but what he did know was that you hadn’t changed. you were still such a good person, so kind and sweet - and it pissed him off. maybe it was the fact he changed so much he didn’t know himself, or maybe that you were his direct opposite at this point in time. but he didn’t like feeling this way. but he was too deep to stop. it’s probably how he found himself outside your dorms, at 2am, drunk and fighting with someone he didn’t even know.

the pounding on your door woke you up, you stirred and swung the door open to see who was practically trying to kick your door down this late. you were met with a frantic jungkook, looking back and forth from your door to the exit of the building.

“y/n quick it’s jimin” he rushed out and you quickly slipped on some shoes, not even thinking about the fact you only had bed shorts on and a tank top. you rush out to see jimin rolling around in the floor with another guy. throwing in punches every now and then. “he said to get you or he wouldn’t stop” jungkook explained and you just huff

“jimin!” you call out and he pushed the guy away from him to look at where your voice shouted from. stumbling his way over to you, he slumps over you. his arms hanging over your shoulders and you stumble with his weight being pushed down on you. jungkook grabs one of his arms and you take the other, guiding him into your dorm. once inside you place him on your bed and he just sits there, slumped over. “jungkook, go to sleep i can handle this” you say softly and he gives you a little bit of a look “trust me it’s okay” reluctantly he leaves, closing the door softly behind him. sighing you get some stuff to help the injuries jimin had. sitting next to him on the bed, you gently grab his head making him turn to you. when you look at his eyes, it’s like staring at young jimin, before he changed. his gaze was so soft that it made your heart pound. clearing your throat, you begin to fix him up, but his hand falling to grip your bare thigh had you stopping what your were doing. he sighs as he begins to rub your thigh.

“iam so fucking sorry” he mutters and you think you’re hearing things for a second but you definitely heard it. heard his apology, it was completely sudden but he didn’t just stop there. “i miss you, god i really miss you” his eyes began to get teary and his head falls onto your shoulder as he begins to cry. you’re still too shocked to say anything, this was the most vulnerable you’ve seen him in a long time. “i can’t do this anymore”

after that night, you were scared. sending jimin home in the morning, not many words were exchanged and you worried he’d just go back to his old self. the boys were a little surprised to see you walk through the diner door, but greeted you with big smile nonetheless.

“y/n you’re back” jin smiles brightly and you return it, sliding into the both next to jungkook. jimin was still yet to even look at you.

“i told her to come along” jungkook says “it’s been long enough”

“iam sorry i flaked guys, had some - stuff to sort out” the boys eyes automatically glance to jimin briefly but they don’t linger. “what’s the plan for today?” you ask cheerily and they all smile, happy to have you back. what you hadn’t expected was for the plan to all get drunk at namjoons house. but that’s what you were doing, it was currently 1am and you all sat around laughing. you found yourself in the kitchen, pouring a drink when someone comes in. shutting the door as they do so, making you turn.

“i need to see something” jimin states making you look at him a little confused, but he strides towards you lifting you quickly and planting you on the kitchen island. you could help the squeak that came out of your throat in surprise. but jimin stares and holds your waist with one hand as the other goes to hold your neck. moving closer, so slowly, he leans in. eyes drifting to lips and his gaze stays there. your heart beat quickened automatically and you gripped the island hard. he carried on moving in, his gaze going back to your eyes as his lips grazed yours - just barely touching. you could feel his breath mix with yours and your eyes fluttered shut naturally “fuck it” he mumbles, voice husky as he does so. your eyes flutter back open but not for long as he smashes his lips onto yours making you groan in surprise. he pulls you into him harder and deepens this kiss after nibbling on your bottom lip. realising what was happening you pull away a little, breathing heavy.

“don’t act like you don’t feel the same” he mutters and it annoyed you that you did feel the same, he was right about your feelings. as soon as he moved closer you wanted to feel his plump lips on yours. it made your body burn in the best way. so, you reach up and pull him by his neck to reconnect your lips and he moans in your mouth. hands running up your bare thighs - great day to decide to wear a skirt. he pushes the skirt up to your hips and his eyes almost roll back after seeing the red lace that your wore underneath. “i’ve waited so long to do this” he groans, moving his lips your neck mumbling in between kisses “after watching you run around with jungkook for a year i finally can have what’s mine” he chooses a particular spot on the side of your neck to suck harshly and your head rolls back. “be a good girl and stay quiet for me hm?” you nod frantically making him chuckle. his hand reaches under your lace making you gasp as he slowly rubs. “always such a good girl weren’t you? but here you are, already so wet for me when six guys are in the other room” his words only added fuel to your fire, but with how slowly his fingers were working it was driving you insane

“jimin-” you moan out and he loved the way his name fell from your lips. it was something he imagined many times before, even dreamt about. but now you were here, for real and he wasn’t going to waste this opportunity. slipping a single finger into you, you gasp at the feeling but then he speeds up his actions and it had you jolting forward to grip his shoulders. adding another finger he moves even faster and leans down to kiss your neck. the sensations were making you insane and it was becoming increasingly harder to hide your moans when his fingers were deep inside you. “i’m gonna-”

“no you’re not” with that he pulls his fingers out just before you could finished and you’re left panting slightly. he gives you a smirk before licking the fingers that were once inside you before waking backwards giving you a long stare before turning and leaving. you felt so embarrassed, was it another one of his tactics to piss you off? it had to have been. you felt so stupid. jumping off the island you pull your skirt down and pull yourself together before joining the group again.

“did you two argue again?” hoseok sighs but you shake your head

“nope, don’t even have anything to talk to him about anymore” you let out and jimin looks over to you but you simply ignore him. you didn’t want him to know he had gotten to you. in fact, you walked right over to where jungkook was sat on the couch and placed yourself on his lap. thinking nothing of it, he smiles up at you, holding your waist. jimin looked over at the pair of you, his jaw tightening at the sight. did you just forget what the pair of just done in the kitchen? or did you just not care? he wasn’t going to do anything, just bite his tongue and have a conversation with you in the morning but when you leaned down to whisper in jungkooks ear and started sharing giggles? his plan changed. standing back up he marched over to you, grabbing your hand and pulling you from your friends lap. everyone watches on but can’t say much when jimin’s already dragged you up the stairs into a room.

“you’re mine, do i need to remind you? because clearly the kitchen wasn’t a good enough reminder” you scoff at this, he sure was taking this little scheme as far as he could

“look stop, you’ve had your fun and embarrassed me okay you win?” he bites onto his lower lip as he stares at you. when he stays silent you turn on your heels to leave

“stop please don’t leave” he calls out but you just ignore him, not wanting to get played by any of his tricks but he run in front of you. “what do i need to do beg? because i will y/n, just stay” the slight break in his voice has you thinking maybe he was being honest. but if the past year taught you anything it’s that jimin didn’t care that much as to how he hurt you he just did it. you were hesitant.

“jimin, forgive me if i have trouble wanting to be alone with you when you like to trick me into intimate situations for a laugh” his eyes widen at this but you simply just stand there

“for a laugh?” he lets out and you shrug “a fucking laugh?” he seethes. there was some silence as you just looked at him, not faltering. “god! why can’t you see that i love you?!” now you falter, he - loved you? if this was still a trick it had gone to far, your heart began to hurt.

“jimin, that is not funny. don’t joke-”

“joke?!” he lets out an exasperated huff “iam not fucking joking. i love you and i can’t go on pretending like iam fine. when really my university sucks, my other friends are assholes and iam not even me anymore. this isn’t me, i don’t want to be like this. it’s an act y/n. i just want-” he breaks

“- you. i want you” he finishes and you take a deep breath. this was real, you could clearly see that. he wasn’t pretending anymore, not hiding behind this “bad boy” persona. quickly you wrap your arms around his neck and he instantly pulls you into him. it was the first hug you shared since you all said your goodbyes for the first day on university last year. he kept this to himself the whole time, that he was unhappy. “iam sorry for everything, i just - took it out on you that you never came with me. that i was alone.” you simply held him tighter, just happy to have him in your arms again.

“i’ve missed you so much jimin” you let out and he sighs as he holds you his his embrace. “i love you too idiot- i always have” he pulls away from the hug, hands resting on your waist.

“even when i was horrible?” he smiles and you rolls your eyes at this

“yes so maybe iam the idiot” jimin just ignores this as he leans down to kiss you, you happily reciprocating. he groans as push your tongue into his mouth. “bed, now” he orders

“well the good news is they’re not fighting” taehyung states with his ear pressed up against the door as the six boys stand behind him.

“what’s the bad news?” namjoon whispers and taehyung pulls himself from the door and stands up

“you may want to buy new sheets, or burn the bed. your choice”

#bts fanfic #hoseok #jimin #jungkook #seokjin #namjoon #taehyung #jimin x reader #jimin oneshot #jimin smut #jimin x y/n

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