#but also accepts that in this case it just isnt gonna work out

[hylorien]

I adore the Halsin Mate Theory™ but I still wholeheartedly ship him with Astarion because I fully believe Halsin needs a fat dose of 'Sometimes Nature Does NOT Have Its Shit Together'

#like hes fully aware of his attraction to tav #but also accepts that in this case it just isnt gonna work out #and also he adores the vampire #who is basically a perversion of nature in his weirdo eyes #and theyre both like look at this absolute freak #seconds before making out #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate iii #astarion ancunin #daddy halsin #halsin #astarion #halstarion #bloodbear

[theblackinnkeeper]

Sorry, only messaging on anon cause I can’t send an ask on the right account but, I mean I totally get what you’re saying about Komaeda as a whole but I think some things are being overlooked. For one, in regards to his actions in well, the whole story really, I have to present a question. Do we hold children accountable for their actions? Yes, to a point, but we also acknowledge that their brains aren't developed and there are certain processes that they are quite literally incapable of. The same can be said of Komaeda. His brain is literally deteriorating, which in a way could be akin to a child with an undeveloped brain, and the parts that get damaged first in most cases of FTD are all parts of the brain that have to do with moral judgement. specifically the ability to recognize something as morally right or wrong, ability to recognize whats socially appropriate, and ability to empathize (this is all just mostly the ventromedial cortex, so there are countless other symptoms that come into play but) as well as an increasing loss of self awareness. If he were just mentally ill, i would agree that his actions are definitely his fault and his own but in this case, it's much trickier. is a person whose brain is literally deteriorating someone we should consider a moral agent? is this someone in control of themselves enough to be accountable for their actions in full? i wouldn't say so.

but also another thing is that i personally love chiaki, and i have no issues with hinami but i also think its odd that you're anti komahina. like, i mean there are ships im less fond of or that i even think would be better/worse than others but i dont see why if its not the one you like most that you need to reject it entirely. the only times i think thats really necessary is in cases of shipping abusers with their victims or ships thats are problematic i.e. age difference. beyond that, isnt it just easier to idk man…. accept that you’re not gonna agree with every ship you see? Just an observation.

I hear and I get what you are trying to say but I think you fail to get a few things while yes his dementia influences his actions to some degree it’s also due to his obsession with and as nagito said he doesn’t mind killing or being killed if it’s for the sake of hope and while his dementia does affect his perception a bit it’s not enough considering he’s one of the most perceptive characters in the game considering he’s the one who usually has it all figured out so I don’t think the comparison to a child really works with a character like him and if he’s at least aware enough to have a distinct sense of right and wrong(regardless of how screwed up it is) I do think that is enough to be held accountable

If you want to know it’s mostly because I find the ship to be toxic and the fans to be annoying (Everytime I criticize nagito’s actions guess how many fans are in the inbox or comment section are there it’s a pain I tell you) and I was annoyed at all the dr3 Chiaki hate plus hinanami hate (seriously if someone gripes about how despair arc forgot komahina again I’m gonna scream)

So I sort of decided that i should return the favor now I understand that there are worse ships out of there but none of their fans have ever given me a reason to go after them (unlike most komahina fans)

And because nagito’s treatment of hajime in chapter 4 and 5 just bugs me

Because while nagito doesn’t act like fuyuhiko(pre chapter 2) or hiyoko during this time what makes it bugs me is who he’s saying it to

Hajime is someone very insecure about himself and struggles with his self worth due to his lack of talent and very much doesn’t like having his insecurities touched at

So to see someone who supposedly loves him call him worthless And make him out to be dead weight just bugs me

And unlike Souda or toko who both get off on this kind of treatment hajime doesn’t not enjoy it

So it just annoys and disturbs me

I hope my answer was worth your time

#danganronpa #nagito komaeda #hajime hinata #chiaki nanami #anti komahina

[rohirric-hunter]

so i just came across your post about not taking heist movies seriously since getting a job as a security guard, and the timestamp isnt loading so i have no idea how long ago it was and im sure you've been asked this before so sorry in advance but. im curious. why would bribing a security guard definitely not work?

That post was a very long time ago lol. It's interesting to look back on now that I don't work as a security guard anymore. I miss the job very much, but unfortunately all the companies in my area were bought out by Allied Universal, which is a bad company that treats its employees badly and offers poor security services to boot, so it's not a job that's available to me anymore.

The thing about being a security guard is it's literally the easiest job in the world. The entire job is: show up, wear a uniform, be awake. Occasionally open a door. (One or more of these items may be optional, depending on the specific job.) And for introverts and young professionals who get into it out of retail, it's heaven because you don't generally have to talk to people unless you have specific tangible business with them. And you get yelled at a lot less than in retail. And when you do get yelled at the correct response is not to immediately roll over like in retail but to stand your ground and calmly make them understand that they're not helping their case (which is AMAZING for your mental health). It's also something you can basically stay in forever. Many of the people I worked with were older, in their 60s or later, not because they couldn't afford to retire but because they didn't want to give up the structure of having a job. It has few to no physical requirements and the few requirements it does have, like patrolling, are offset by hours of downtime in most shifts.

It pays well, too. I made a comfortable living wage with plenty of money for spending and saving starting, and that was on the lower end of the pay scale; it only goes up from there. In my area basically the only jobs that pay more are things like garbage collector and bartender -- both of whom have a very high barrier of entry and are MUCH harder.

Basically, it's the best job in the world. Not for everyone, but for people who gravitate towards it and tend to stay. If you don't think it's the best job in the world then you think it's the worst job in the world and you'll either leave or get fired before too long.

And if you accept a bribe? For any reason? You're out. You're blacklisted. You'll never work security again. Ever. So somebody offers you $20k. That's a lot of money. That's a pretty hefty amount. But it'll run out eventually. And when it does, how are you gonna get more money? Retail? As if. Bartending? Only if you spent a hefty chunk of that $20k on school. 100k? Not gonna last forever. 500k? Maybe if I had a head for investing but at this point people are gonna start asking where the money came from and presumably you wanted to spend it on something other than moving away and changing your name.

I just. Can't comprehend an amount of money that would make me or anyone with sense give up the ability to have that kind of job. It would have to be enough to live comfortably for the rest of your life without working, at a very high standard of living. Plus enough to cover legal fees, because accepting the bribe would definitely get you sued and quite possibly arrested. Somewhere in the multiple millions I would assume. And if you have that much money to spend on bribing a security guard then there are probably cheaper ways to do whatever you're after.

(Maybe if you were lucky you could find a security guard in like crippling medical debt or something but to be quite honest I wouldn't accept a bribe from a stranger who knew that about me either so you would legitimately just have to get lucky. And once again, if you have that much money you presumably have better things to be doing than bribing security guards.)

[my-mt-heart]

About JDM. I agree that in a ideal world no one should be talking on behalf of everyone else, show business or not, "normal work place" (ah ah) or not. But we re not in an ideal world, and people are bound to make mistakes in the heat of the moment..people are human and flawed, even tv super stars.

Also, not to blame her because she does what she wants of course, but MMB never spoke herself publicly on the matter so its kind of hard to know what she thinks.

Also again, the pb for me should not be, as i 've read, that he's a man talking on behalf of a woman. Im not saying there isnt mysogyny or sexism in hollywood or "the real world" (ah ah), but as far as im concerned (and im not a man before anyone comes at me for this), he spoke as a collegue abt another collegue . Well, former collegue, now. Also, apparently he's one of NR best friend, so if ur best friend is attacked and u feel its unfair, yeaaah u re gonna publicly defend him.

Mind u: NR didnt speak himself for quite a long time after the inital mess, i think the first thing he said was after a few weeks with an answer to a fan on line who was like "eh norman have u seen whats being said" blablabla, and he answered something like "what did i miss? 😎" in a sort of ironical/cynical way. Correct me if im wrong.

But my point is that i personnally saw a collegue speaking for a collegue, and a friend defending a friend. If it had been Lauren Cohan saying "eh guys your wrong!" Would people have been more kind to her because its ok for a woman to talk on behalf or another woman?

JDM might no be super close to Melissa but last time we checked, they were more than fine with each other (i still think abt this lovely bts picture of both of them for 10.12, yes, its just promo but still).

And he didnt say anything bad abt her. He just said "they love each other, they re both very sad abt the situation and Norman's not the bad guy here". Maybe he knows them better than we do?

Was it clumsy of him? Yes. He might have actually been hurt for Norman and didnt think straight, who knows?

Was it inappropriate? Not his role? Probably. But the argument of him being a man here, while i do in a way understand where its coming from, still cant help but feel uneased by it. I for one think if we are going to be outraged, we should be outraged at whoever is speaking on behalf of Melissa, but im pretty convinced that if Lauren or Danai had defended Norman, nobody would have bat an eye. We are complaining because he's a man, and because he's supposedly the closest to Norman amongst the cast. Feel a bit unfair.

Its ok if u or your followers disagree of course. Again, im not saying that there isnt a pb with men vs woman in hollywood or the world in general, i just think that in this case, this is not the pb.

The idea that Melissa needed a break is inherently sexist because it implies she couldn't keep up with the same workload that her male colleagues had been given. Also, blasting it on Twitter has major ramifications for Melissa because people are far more likely to accept that a woman needs a break vs. a man needing one. You may recall that Andy said himself that being overseas, away from his family, became too difficult, yet no one criticized his fans for demanding Rick back for four years.

Even if contracts allowed a lead actress to back out that way (they don't), even if it was true that Melissa needed a break (-_-), it makes her look flaky and weak to other studios who might consider casting her on another project. Melissa and AMC legally agreed to announce that the location was "untenable" for her, nothing else. That's important. Regardless of whether or not JDM said what he said to defend his friend, it went off script and that's unprofessional.

Do I like that Norman was being cast as the evil villain? No. Do I think he was the evil villain in all of this? Ultimately...no. I'm frustrated because usually when a show is dealing with a controversy, the go-to strategy is to not say anything until the situation is further assessed, yet AMC and one of their male leads acted pretty fast to directly address the backlash in defense of another male lead. Melissa didn't get the same treatment. In fact, she's been dealing with fans saying sexist and ageist things about her and Carol for years without anything being done about it. And for the record, that doesn't have to mean calling out every fan who insults them. It is worth noting though, that the one person who did come to Melissa's defense last April (in an appropriate way) was Laurie Holden, who is no stranger to mistreatment herself. That should tell us something.

So in conclusion, anon, the issue here might not come down to a man speaking for a woman, but there is absolutely a gender bias in this whole mess. JDM's actions have unfortunately changed my perception of him, and while I might be able to support Norman again eventually (provided Melissa does too and provided I don't feel alienated as a Caryl fan), it's probably going to take a lot more than a Narol tweet for me to support JDM again (not that I had much interest in watching the same drama unfold between Negan and Maggie anyway). Every time I see someone insist that Melissa needed a break and try to scold others for "robbing her of her choice," it makes me angry all over again because how can you ever really undo all that damage?

ETA: If a woman had jumped the gun like JDM did, she would've been fired so fast. JDM still has his show.

#caryl #caryl spinoff #carol peletier #melissa mcbride #darylneedscarol

[coveredinredpaint]

hi! my name is rex too and i think thats pretty cool

anyway, i was wondering if you had any tips on dressing feminine but like,,,, also being able to pass? or tips on being confident enough to not need to pass?

heyy that is pretty cool!!

im gonna be honest with you, i never really managed to pass before starting t. there were like 5 times ppl gendered me correctly but after that they immediatly "corrected" themselves. the only person who didnt was a toddler, i hope hes doing great.

all the tips and tricks ppl gave out never worked for me, never managed to figure out why, im thinking it was mostly my voice.

so i got absolutely no passing advice for you, but i can definitely tell you how to work on your confidence and say fuck you to societies ridiculous expectations

(it turned out longer than i distracted, i cant give concrete advice apparently my apologies)

tw: mention of bullying and some mental health stuff but nothing heavy

before i start i will say that it takes time. it takes time to learn and let go of this need to fit in. to learn to do your own thing even if you have to do it alone. to grow and learn who you want to be or are.

first we need to understand that expectations of how we should act or dress or look, whether based on our gender or not, are absolute bullshit. like straight up made up.

step one is kill the cop in your head. every time you judge yourself (or someone else) for something, ask why you care about that. most of the time its cause you have been taught in some way that what youre doing is not according to "the rules". this can be for the smallest things, like when i get really excited and stim about something i used to feel embarassed because "men dont act like that". sometimes i still feel that way. its not something you can just get rid of, so its important to actively affirm yourself that what youre doing is okay and that you are allowed to do what makes you happy.

dealing with yourself is already a hell of a challenge, but other people, that something else. i hope you live in an accepting area and i have heard many stories of people are queer fully accepted for it. but often thats sadly not yet the case. surely isnt for me at my school. there are people who are gonna make you feel like shit, who are gonna call you all the horrible things the voice in your brain calls you too. you are gonna wish you were "normal" sometimes, even if you dont really mean it.

going back to normal? going back in the closet? letting go of the clothes that make my feel better even on the most dysphoric days? fuck no, i finally started to get myself, my life back, im not sacrificing that for some teens whos names i dont even know. so you turn it around, no longer "why do they treat me like that" but "how dare they treat me like that" if they kick you while youre down you better bite their ankles and dont let go. most people who bully people who are "other" are terrified of what they see in us. we are living proof that their belief of how the world should work is very wrong. they call you a fag and a tranny? you better come to school next day in the gayest clothes you own. they call you an emo and bark at you? you better be dressed even more punk the next day. they may laugh at you, yell at you, even record you or push you around. it doesnt matter, they hold no power over who you are.

but please do not try and carry this alone. dont let yourself turn bitter. its is difficult to be treated like shit for simply existing. even when it doesnt hurt as much as it did its still exhausting. find someone to talk to, whether its a family member you trust, a friend, a mental health professional or other queer people online. its important not to suppress your feelings. get them out, by either talking about them or writing or making art or music.

know that its your life and you can live it however the hell you want. be kind to yourseld, be kind to others. if you are not where you want to be to right now you will in the future. cant really call it a life if you didnt live for it. it will get better, you just got to keep going and keep fighting.

#queer punk #punx #queercore #punk #transmasc #trans punk

[flying-bear-tv]

WWDITS RANT <3

Ok i just finished watching the WWDITS season finale and It made me laugh so much but also some of it was shitty and i feel like sharing to the class.

So most insane things first I have no idea why Guillermo decided not to be a vampire. It is even explicitly shown how great he feels after drinking human blood like he is ready??? and then suddenly its like a switch flipped and he has a problem killing a human. He has never really gave a shit about that for FIVE FUCKING SEASONS. He is even like yeah i know i dismembered a shitton of body and lured people to their deaths and killed a shitton of vampires (who tbh he can definitely empathize with like humans as he has been involved with them for years) (OVER 10 YEARS) but i cant suck this guys throat owo. Like he has devoted his entire life to this for a decade and all of a sudden he backs out? I'm not saying this isn't just weird bad writing but the lamp nandor pulled out was the big one which he knows has no wishes left. I think its possible either nandor wished that Guillermo wanted to be human OR Guillermo purposely got himself turned back into a human so Nandor could be the one to turn him. Like he had everything set up with the necromancer to undead Derick pretty quickly...... idk im just saying. Also It feels like nothing has changed. I wish Nandor would have helped him with dericks body or something. Just to show that Guillermo is accepted a little more. I know you guys will debate me on this but its the little things like that that make you really feel part of the group. Lazlo came in clutch as always though I love him so much he really is one of my comfort characters of all time. (I even think that if my theory ends up being the case that Lazlo knew about Guillermo's plan cause that would definitely go along with the theme of Lazlo and Guillermo hiding stuff from the others throughout the season) But yea. Weird ending with Guillermo and im gonna be PISSED if there isnt a seriously good explanation for that.

Next: the Guide... Yea WHAT THE FUCK they did her so dirty like no hahah we liked you the whole time haha. Are you for serious. are you joking with me. This could have been a HUGE chance for character growth on the vamps part. They could have realized that yea. healthy relationships need to have mutual respect and both people need to contribute. They could have brought Lazlo's journey with him becoming a bit more human this season full circle. Nandor could have realized that how he has treated Guillermo is not great. He could have been like yea no wonder he got turned by someone other than me. I have been using him to do dirty work for years and stringing him along with the promise that I would eventually turn him which even I convinced myself was true in order to keep things just as how theve always been. I wont kill him because he means more to me than a stupid vampire rule that im only doing because its what is always done. (Like Nandor realized he didn't want to kill Guillermo after a second of seriously thinking about it.) Guillermo could have let him out of that cage and they could have hugged and figured out what to do like the fucking found family they are damn it.

NADJA ......... nadja's whole thing this season was the fact that she treats people like shit and is pretty selfish and she didnt even have a moment where she actually showed change. IM SICK IM DYING IM THROWING UP IN THE STREET.

I realize that them liking the guide the whole time is a funny joke but guys. was it worth it. was it fucking worth it...

For the things I liked lol I really liked Lazlo he is allways slaying his fits were spectacular his matching hair with Nadja is incredible He is a real friend to Guillermo and everything that comes out of his mouth is hilarious.

Im glad the guide got some kind of revenge she deserves it I love her.

Guillermo hiding out in the motel was funny and i love how everyone visited him individually.

Guillermo being really happy after turing into a bat and getting his fangs was also really cute

Also "this meat has kissed the grill" i started crying i have no idea why this was so funny to me

Nandor stalking the fucking panera bread and setting up a whole fake ritual for Guillermo 10/10

also final round of applause for Nadja and Lazlos hair and outfits this season. I wish i were them.

anyways funny vampire show heheeh i wont get too upset about it and i wont make a conspiracy about how they wrote it bad on purpose because I cant cope with reality *cough* good omens fans *cough* SORRY but guys... guys... its not 2017 wake up please we dont need another TJLC please I have to say somthing.

love you all touch grass <3

comment 💥if you read all of this shit i want to know

#what we do in the shadows #wwdits #wwdits s5 #what we do in the shadows season 5 #wwdits spoilers #wwdits finale #wwdits theories #ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ.txt #sorry about the spelling im trying its just how it is

[a-scummy-hybrid]

Some random HELLDIVERS 2 ideas floating around in my head

This is just gonna be a post thats gonna consist of things i've seen others mention or things i've thought about myself, anyways, here's the list i guess:

Scout Rifle (Unlocked at Level 5) - Modified Sniper Rifle equipped with a Thermal Scope & Silencer designed for more stealthier approaches in missions, its not as powerful as the Anti-Material Rifle but still packs a very mean punch (basically a singular point lower in the Armor Penetration Scale compared to AMR, additionally, it should be noted that it works best in positions where you are far away from the enemy, just because its silenced, it doesn't mean enemies nearby your position cant hear it).

2. Weapon & Armor Customization (+ A Bonus Thing)- I think almost about everyone underneath the sun has talked about this, while i do understand it'd probably be a bit difficult to add it in right now, i would potentially like to see in the future considering that most of the weapons look like they were meant to be detachable at one point (such as certain weapons sharing attachments, that one HD2 Trailer where each Helldiver had a different attachment on each of their Liberator, and other things im forgetting about), and also they did mention they were gonna introduce color variations for armor sometime in the near future, however what I'd honestly like to see it be added in the form of something you have to unlock (sorta similar to how in MGSV you can unlock variations of an existing gun but cannot customize them until you get the Legendary Gunsmith, which once you do, you are able to pull from the various attachments each gun you researched onto any weapon that accepts them):

2a. It could be a Ship Upgrade but as to the name of it... I'm honestly very unsure, I dont think it has a name so i'll call it "LIBERTY & DEMOCRACY QUARTERS" considering the words 'LIBERTY' & 'DEMOCRACY' are in front of the Armory & Unusable Terminal, anyways, upgrades are as followed:

2b. Data Acquisition Terminal (Common Samples Required) - The D.A.T allows for information to be gathered from the Battlefield via the power of Marking & Gathering (This basically gives you a beastiary/logbook for various items & enemies you face off against, which give you useful tips & flavor text, in addition, it keeps track as to how many of said enemy you've killed (including the times they've killed your Helldivers)/how many items you've collected), it also tracks the random notes you find out on the field, listing it as "Questionable Material").

2c. Armor-Smith Cybernetics (Commons, Rares & STREAMLINED REQUEST PROCESS Required) - The Armory is now further enhanced with the usage of highly advanced patriotic-robotics & precise liberty-based algorithms (Allows for Weapon & Armor Customization, Armor requires the usage of Requisition Slips in order to unlock color variations, in order to give some extra uses for RS, same could apply for weapon customization sorta similar to MGSV, where weapons cost GMP in order to deploy except for the really low level versions, which in the case of HD2, it would be the weapon that had the preset attachments, additionally, this means your death is gonna cost more than just a life, so be weary of that, but so it isnt as expensive, maybe the application of each attachment is about... 100 or 250 RS each).

2d. Super Sonar Dish (Commons, Rares, Supers & NUCLEAR RADAR Required) - The Nuclear Radar is now retrofitted with the Super Sonar Dish, allowing for better reads on the battlefield (The radar will now display items you've run past, such as if you ran past a Common or Rare Sample, the Radar will now track it. In addition, as an added bonus, you are given an alert a minute prior to whenever a geological or meteorological event is about to occur. Something else to note is that if you complete a Radar Station Objective, this further enhances the Super Sonar Dish).

3. Medical Spray Tower (Unlocked at Level 10) - A tower full of Stim-Based Spray is deployed and will periodically heal nearby Helldivers that are within range of it, although unlike Stims, it cannot heal serious wounds and does not provide the temporary regeneration a Stim provides (It is highly unknown what it does to bugs and cannot bring people back from the dead).

4. "Buddy" (Unlocked at Level 20 - Costs 25K Requisition Slips) - This patriotic rover is capable of helping you with tasks that your otherwise heroic teammates are unable to help you with! (It helps specifically for opening buddy doors but it will constantly blare loud patriotic music, thus alerting enemies to your position at a constant, can be deactivated with the BACKPACK button).

5. The ability to deactivate backpack related items using the backpack button, so for example, being able to put away the ballistic shield without needing to have a two handed weapon, or maybe deactivating the Shield Backpack to Recharge it to full capacity.

6. Different Super Earth Structure Designs Related to Planet's Composition & Planetary Events - As to what this means, is... well, we shouldnt assume that a planet is constantly dealing with shitty conditions without some method to protecting themselves from it(such as Meteorites, Volcanic Activity, Tremors, and Ion Storms), they definitely would have had something to defend themselves or make living on the planet much more tolerable. Additionally, some more varied SE Designs related to the planet's habitat would be nice compared to the same old Super Earth Generated Structure Number Something Something.

6a. In addition, maybe unique new missions relating to whatever the shitstorm the planet deals with? So lets take the Tein Kwan Event for example, it was simply a "Oh, heres a new planet unlocked, liberate it and you get exo-mechs!", which, while neat, I feel like it could have been made more interesting if it was done akin to the TCS Dispersal Event where you need to activate an Asteroid Defense System (that the automatons took out at various factories across the planet) in order to actually protect the planet, so maybe something like this:

"The production of the Exo-Patriots have halted after Automatons hit the ADS of Tein Kwan, liberate this planet and crush the Automaton Presence so the production of the mechs may resume."

Main Event Mission:

Reactivate A.D.S - Your mission is to land in one of the many exo-patriot facilities and reactivate the defense systems. Eradicate the automaton infestation that is keeping managed democracy in their shackles! Doing so will resume production of the facility and allow for the workers to be safe.

Planet World Gen Details: Evidence of much "smaller" but destroyed ADS in certain spots of a planet. Automaton AA Guns acting as a means to protect Outposts from oncoming Meteorites.

...More ideas to be added later when i remember about them.

#my personal thoughts #helldivers 2 #random ideas i have thought about

[nikkisixxsgirlfriend]

this must be the place

being one of the byers/hoppers (headcannons)

jonathon

you aways gotta fight him for the bathroom cause he wants to spend twenty minutes on his hair to impress nancy

typical sibling fights including light punching and dramatic fake injuries

will always have your back no matter what

will punch ppl for you

when youre feeling down he'll sit with you and talk

you always catch nancy escaping out of his window and use it as blackmail against him

would give you the shirt off his back

always lends you his music and plays songs he knows you like in the car

will drive you anywhere in that old car,any time of day

will save up his money to get you and will good gifts

not one for hugs or saying i love you on the regular but he'll still accept if you do that

s4 jonathon would tell you to stay away from drugs and then go get high w argyle

argyle is also like a second older brother to you

jonathon makes sure everyone looks after and protects you even if you dont need it

nearly beat steve to a pulp in s1 cause he said something mean about you

teams up with you to glare at mike

isnt the best at school but still tries to help you with your work

will watch obscure artsy movies with you

cooks for your family every day

does not get into sibling fights,like he physically cant get mad at you

threatens each person you go on a date with

will make sure you get enough sleep every night even though he hasnt slept in years

takes photos of you and the rest of the byers

you give him the worst nicknames and that mfer will just sit there and say nothing

will mock any school related parties or activities unless you join them in which case he will be incredibley supportive

joyce

will have jonathon spy on you 24/7

she trusts your judgement in your friends and your dates but is still weary

never lets you come home alone

always supportive

is always there for you

her hugs are like hugging a cloud

always has a huge smile when she sees you

would die for you and your siblings

whispers that youre her favourite and then does that to will and jonathon

the type to take a million photos before your prom

when youre off to like save the world she'll hold your face and hug you and squeeze your cheeks so much its suffocating

is always scared shes gonna lose you guys so she gets terrified when something happens

would beat up a 4yo if they were mean to you

gives you your space when you need it

will let you borrow her clothes

always wants to make sure you're okay

sometimes she'll be up in the middle of the night at the kitchen table and when she sees you she'll make you something hot to drink as you guys talk

works incredibley long hours so she can provide for you guys

would give you the shirt off her back and pants

if you had a cold she would lose her mind tryna take care of you

she isnt the best cook ngl but she'll always try to make you something you guys like

does those excited little mom screams when something good happens

will tell hopper every little detail about you when he comes over

hopper

isnt exactly your dad but also is definitely your dad

will straight up arrest anyone who bothers you

calls every person you date a punk and tries to threaten them

trusts your judgement but it still an overprotective dad

confused about everything but always has the spirit

will let you and your siblings eat absolute trash when joyce is out

will sit with you and tell you stories to calm your nerves

"can i borrow this?" "keep it"

says you cant date till youre 50

if youre going through an emo phase or smth he'll ask you a million questions and still be confused

makes little jokes about everyone with you

will warn you about 'guys like eddie' then when he gets to know them he'll secretly like them

quit alot of his bad habits when he started living with you guys

stops himself in the middle of angry rants and reminds himself to be calm for you guys

will jump in harms way to protect you guys

if youre sick he'll still send you to school with no hesitation

stops before he does anything risky to remind himself of you guys and make sure hes doing this for the right reasons

him and joyce cant go a day without being around you guys

murray ends up being your weird conspiracy theory uncle,and enzo ends up being a 'weirdly hot friend of your dads' according to nancy

teams up with Jonathon to threaten the people you date so you cant leave them alone with your dad or brother,ever

"when i was your age-"

will

will try to stick up for you only to end up getting himself bullied

you always stick up for him

youre always talking to him tryna comfort him

you are there 24/7 for this boi

hes always drawing stuff for you

and will annoy you to no end about his dorky fantasy stuff

tries to teach you dnd

cannot cook.like absolutely has no skill in the kitchen

is painfully uncoordinated and you try to stifle your laughs when he trips for the fifth time that day

you try to help him understand his feelings because quite frankly he doesnt understand them himself

loves you more than everyone else because you treat him normally

you call him a nerd and he calls you a whale,the daily routine.

you give him your own music reccomendations

you always make fun of his haircut and he proceeds to violate you with insults

he'll wear your clothes and then once hes already got them on he'll ask if he can borrow them

you both always make eachother laugh

when hes done being ominous you make fun of his scribble drawings and imitate his posessed moments which earns a scolding from joyce

he will lip sync to every song you play

jonathon will be in the drivers seat looking serious ash and you and Will will be jamming in the backseat

you always listen to his nerdy ramblings and roll your eyes but when christmas or his birthday rolls around you always get him something hes been ranting about

on his birthday you make sure everyone knows.you throw a massive party and invite practically everyone.

if anyones mean to him you and jonathon are prepared for murder a good talking to

you make fun of his crush on mike and he proceeds to steal all of your favourite clothes,forcing you to wear a shirt from when you were nine years old with a cartoon on it to school

he tries to act all grown up when he gets to highschool so you have to act extra childish to make up for it on his part

will give you the food on his plate,but not the shirt off his back cause hes self conscious

always wants to go to amusement parks with your family and every fourth of july he forces you guys outside to watch the fireworks

eventually you and jonathon just bought will the fireworks and every year you guys sit on the porch as him and his dorky friends light em up

jane/eleven

always smiling,no matter what

will tell you all about her day or about a story she heard with this incredible excitement

refuses to eat much else besides eggos

will rummage through your things looking for clothes to wear and leave your room a mess not even knowing

has sleepovers with max every week

one time max left her lipstick and jane used it to draw

thus resulting in you teaching her makeup

you always lend her your music

you teach her new words and lend her your books all the time

she speaks through movies but you dont mind because frankly its adorable

when angela makes fun of her she thinks its some weird way of being friends so you chopped off all of angelas hair

you will and jonathon are always at her side

you compliment her every day

every time she sees you she has this huge smile and waves like crazy

you hug her 24/7 because shes just so precious well minus the murder

you brush and braid her hair every night and she'll tell you about something new she learned

does those word of a day things

she tried making breakfast once,it was bad,real bad but you still ate it all,egg shells and burntness, just because of how happy she looked

you absolutely hate mike because hes a dick to your little sister so hopper and you always try to keep her away from him

she always wants you to paint her nails in the wildest colours

her,will and eddie really get along

but when he played her metallica she had this huge look of confusion on her face "is that really music?"

fav ice cream is mint chocolate chip,shes insane

refuses to let a bad day get to her

cut her hair like that cause "i want to look like joyce"

if you ever swear or use 'slang' she'll repeat what you say with a smile and say it all day earning a laugh from hop and another lecture from joyce

#stranger things #stranger things fanfiction #fanfiction #headcanon #el stranger things #jopper #joyce byers #joyce stranger things #stranger things jonathan #jonathon byers #jane stranger things #jane hopper #will byers #will stranger things #stranger things 4 #el hopper #hopper stranger things

[robocops-a-christ-allegory]

Ok I have finally read the new green arrow issue. I only read the pages with Peacemaker and Peacewrecker because I dont go to Green Arrow heres my take: I actually really liked Chris here : )

Like this is actually super good Peacemaker stuff. Hes having so much fun but hes also being pretty smart (knows who Roy is, isnt continuing to fight when its clear thats pointless). My only issue with Chris is I dont like this speaking style for him, Im still anti Peacemaker being a frat boy but I can almost accept it here (and it is just My Personal Preference Anyway). I really like all his fun little grins Im so glad thats back.

I dont like how Peacewrecker seems to have shaked out here. Peacewrecker’s characterization being rolling her eyes at Peacemaker’s antics and just being here to be a straight woman to him is the lamest route for her

I was actually worried about the case with them being the opposite (her getting Peacemaker’s characterization of being a fun weirdo and Peacemaker being reduced to gruff army guy again) and now I feel foolish for forgetting how comic book characterization works. Of course the woman isnt gonna allowed to be the zany weirdo, what was I even thinking. I guess we’ll see how she goes if she keeps showing up in things

#I am no longer anti peacewrecker like I was but not because of her appearance here #I realized that Peacemaker is at his best when some deranged Peacemaker stan just has a TAKE and now I wanna give her a chance #But yeah I dunno she stood around and fought black canary. Shes goofy when not around Peacemaker I guess #tuesday spoilers #sorry about the paragraphs I was WAITING FOR THIS #I dont know whats going on with Hal or anyone currently but also seeing that last page when Im like #Currently Reading Spectre made me lose my fucking mind

[bipolstar]

I think I'm gonna move to the other end of the country 🙃

Sounds a tad dramatic but Background Info I have a bit of a thing about excessively reading into peoples moods and like, trying damage control in case they blow up at me?? My mum had issues, if I didn't sense she was in a bad mood and damage control she would blow up and ignore me for days etc etc but my brother died and weirdly now she's so much better etc

So like, MONTHS ago I had a chat with my flatmate like "I know ur not going to blow up at me and ignore me for days but tonight I found myself doing like, damage control stuff with you?? It highkey stressed me out but I'm just letting u know that ur doing the warning signs" and she was like "Oh babe no don't worry I didnt even realise" and we had a healthy convo and I thought it would be fine

Cut to 9 months of her taking her moods out on me, and me preventing it from blowing up through damage control. I tried talking to her about it but it just got worse. Legit had to stay at my parents for 2 weeks at one point bc she was stressed about work, taking it out on me, and I was already in a low n just couldnt stay there

CUT TO SATURDAY! I tried to put suncream on her while she was napping in the sun, she proceeded to tell me to piss off with all the lil signs and also her generally being angry at me but in a rattlesnake tail kinda way, I left her be, she came to me a few hours later saying I was being patronising with the suncream, I straight up told her to fuck off for the first time and walked away oops.

So like, I'm pissed off etc etc but p much over it by the next evening. I dont see her for two days, I then saw her this morning...... aaaaaaaand shes ignoring me still. For 3 days 🙃🙃 the only reason she spoke to me was to ask me to move my stuff out the living room bc her nan was coming over (valid)

So! I have an offer to do a masters at the other end of the country and ngl I might just take it, my sister and some pals live there, I adore the city, the course is good and part time so I could earn enough for rent, and it saves me finding SOMEWHERE else to live here.

TL;DR: my flatmate isnt being nice and this was the last straw and I'm thinking of accepting an offer to study in the other end of the country

#personal #this was an ESSAY but fuck me #its a shitty thing for her to do anyway.. but like my issues with damage control and the fact she acts EXACTLY like my mum did is not ideal

[lazarus---rising]

okcan you tell me why you dont want me to help ? or do you want me to but youre too afraid to ask or say yes ? what if i just decided that were gonna work on it together , would that upset you ? maybe you should download a voice changer cuz if this keeps hurtinf you i WILL call you and we WILL get through this together .

also by the laws of queerplatonia you are required to answer this ask . i dont make the rules[i do] ^_^

also what grade are you in ? if u dont wanna answer that question publicly you can put it in my inbox or dm me but it would help to know what level we're workig with . probably would be something i know but in case it isnt i would be willing and eager to learn it rq

but yeah voice changer ! if ur self-conscious about ur voice and dont want me hearing it please get one because i fully intend to call you if you keep doing this to yourself ok ?

also just putting it out there getting help with ur work would be a source of attention i know you enjoy that

honest to god i have like no clue . like my head is physically incapable of accepting help i am genuinely a bit concerned !

#also hauve you considered . i will not answer the call 😁 /silly #also 10th 👍 #also sprry for the sorta . short response im SleepyTired does this one cohere . idk Gootbye

[masonsystem]

this got really long so its under a read more LOL. my thoughts on rs arc

soooo my overall thoughts on the rs arc... hm. i feel like i got final fantasy 8-ed LOL. meaning i enjoyed it as i experienced it but the shit in the ending negated too much of what i was anticipating. which particularly sucks bc i REALLYYYY Love ruby's character and suprisingly even the romance that was built w sapphire! i was very 🤨🧐 at it at first cuz i was worried it was just gonna be another case of "wow girl and boy in the same proximity they HAAAVEE to have a crush on each other." but no it was actually built onto more to a point where i could actually accept it, though i wish ruby at least wore a different hat or something as a kid cuz goddamn does that make sapphire look a bit dumb for not recognizing the same hat.. 😭 but thats just a nitpick. it did turn out satisfyingly cute in the end like aw

ok ill gush a bit more about the parts i liked abt this arc b4 i pick apart everything i disliked about its ending. not to say that its an immediately bad thing cuz it isnt, cuz it was handled p well in the previous arcs, but i did like how none of the gym leaders were evil this time around haha. like they were definitely well-developed in the last arc too.. but i guess it was nice that a hefty amount of limelight got to fall on them this time around thanks to the magma and aqua admins. we had the whole gym leader tournament last arc but its not quite the same. their contributions to the climax wasnt as great as these hoenn leaders evacuating an entire region.

and again i really love ruby's character, and by extension sapphire's. they have a really good humor together, and its definitely the best handling of 2 rivals in this series so far. like i love gold+silver and red+blue, but them sharing the same goal and having.. complementary ideals kind of diminished their effect. not to mention theyre actually a trio and green and kris get sidelined a lot just for the sake of the main two like 😑 but ill get more into that on a seperate post. basically i think ruby and sapphire's rivalry are the strongest bc theyre not a trio (rest in shit wally), their ideals are extremely contrasting (power vs beauty), and they pursue different goals bc of it. the self-imposed time limit is also great and helps make the story feel more concentrated, cuz u have a better idea of how much time is passing and how much time is left. not to mention how both of their backstories make both the time limit and the story behind their ideals much much more significant in a great way i wasnt expecting. i may have missed a few but i kinda wished there were just a slighttt bit more hints cuz it kinda felt like it came out of left field, but its fine. it works out in the end. these two were great both as individual characters and as partners.

i liked the prevalently tropical vibes of hoenn, and i liked how more coordinated the antagonist teams were this time around. it was just as good as the previous mask of ice! a great antagonist is what makes a great arc. and this time we had two! and they were handled really well (except for courtney but she has her own paragraph coming up lmao). not much more to say about this, team magma and aqua were just really well written. i really like how team aqua had control of the media and that bought in the whole "importance of the press" aspect. gabby and ty were great side characters too. i think how relicath circled back in the plot was great. geez this arc was seriously really good until its ending, with things that were made apparent earlier(abandoned ship, relicath, new mauville, etc) coming back full circle to be significant in the climax.

and i think those are my praises for this arc.. i really did enjoy it. but the ending diminished a lot of it. so now heres what i did Not like about the ending:

firstly, the whole debacle with courtney... augh. its good she didnt just come in at the very end and made gradual appearances thruout this arc (unlike SOME plot points. looking at u celery stick) but i dont think it was nearly enough to balance out how much she ended up contributing in the climax. like i really dont think there was enough buildup to justify her taking sapphire's place. ruby's actions of yeeting sapphire out the way got justified with the full exposure of norman's backstory which was honestly pretty badass and i did not see that coming (like im not happy w sapphire getting booted out but at least theres good justification 😑), but that justification did Not extend to courtney. i like courtney's whole contest and beauty backstory but bro that REALLYY isnt enough to redeem her OR make her this significant in the very end. whats most upsetting about this though isnt the existence of courtney as a character but the fact that whatever potential role sapphire couldve filled out in the climax just got completely robbed. sadly she joins kris and green in "female character not contributing as much to the climax as they should be" club. but more on that later..

next up is wally. tho i liked that ruby and sapphire being a duo instead of a trio meant better development of those two, there still is a tertiary character.. wally! his introduction, and being mentioned again by ruby in verdanturf was good, but his contribution to the climax just felt really.. eh. like he doesnt even get to command rayquaza, dude just wakes it up and gets ditched like huh. i like his character, pretty generic and whatever but its still good. his new design looks sick. but i feel like he shouldve been more significant, like he doesnt need to take normans place, but i feel like he couldve at least taken the blind kids place? or absol couldve been relegated to him too somehow?? there were a lot of plot threads that wounded back to the finale and it just feels like a waste of wally's character to have him do this one and only thing. how he was handled is nowhere as bad as courtney and celebi but it definitely was Eh.

and now celebi... You. luckily i actually knew celebi would come around, cuz if i didnt and i was completely blindsided i wouldve probably be even more annoyed! the thing is i dont actually mind celebi playing a part into all of this. what i find very annoying tho is that celebi was used to commit the unforgivable writing sin of Not Commiting To A Death. when u write a death... commit to it!!! but this doesnt mean i dont think ways of reversing those deaths shouldnt be permitted, and it doesnt mean i wholeheartedly think "dead characters should always stay dead". i think its ok if dead characters come back around, but only if the fact that THEY DIEDDD really make its fcking point! there are two ways i think this arc couldve handled it better:

1.) not have celebi in here at all but instead have permanent deaths but lower that death count, i think norman is the only one who needed to die, and maybeee steven. everyone else felt too much like fodder. but the writing doesnt seem like it had the time to deal with grief while still trying to achieve a happy ending for ruby and sapphire which is why they went about it the way they did so..

2.) kill EVERYONE. yknow what it wouldve been sick if ruby fucked up big time by not bringing sapphire with him, and that causes everything to go to shit. like, Everyone gets fucked (and dies or nearly dies). then celebi would have to do some majoras mask shit and then ruby can no longer betray sapphire. that would remedy a lot of the issues i hv w this ending. but anyways yeah, it doesnt specifically need to play out the way i suggested, but i think the stakes being higher would make celebi's inclusion more meaningful. like this climax truly felt like a disaster, like an actually doomsday. needing time itself to turn the tide on it is actually fine. but using it to just reverse a measly 3 deaths (technically 5 but only 3 are highlighted importantly lmao) just feels cheap.. it would have been more meaningful if celebi came into play when the stakes were much higher, if the death count being reversed is a lot more. when celebi came around theyve technically already won. it just feels CHEAP cuz this celery stick really just came in because the writing couldnt commit to these few deaths. like man go big or go home. have no one come back to life, or everyone come back to life. or else shit is just cheap!

and lastly.. i feel like ruby's and norman's relationship was very misleading, and not in a good way. and actually now that i think about it, theres actually a bit too much to say abt it then what i can reasonably fit here so ill make a seperate post for that LOL. two more accompany post if my adhd doesnt get the best of me is are 1.) norman and ruby and 2.) kris and sapphire getting the short end of the stick.

YAYYY post over. rs arc is better than rbg but not as good as yellow or gs. sad. i hope the next few arcs dont let me down or i might end up dropping pokespe before the bw arcs 🤨

[thekingofwinterblog]

It’s all for his sake - Endeavor and the Sunk Cost Fallacy

My hero academia 301 is a pretty interesting chapter, but for me, the most notable piece of it was how Endeavour reacted to the realization that Touya couldnt surpass All Might.

upon realizing that his son might not be able to do it because of inborn physical limitations, he immediatly stopped his training, which frankly was the responsible and adult thing to do. 

This stint of real parenthood did not last long however.

After taking the matter to a doctor, he is flat out told that not only cant Touya achive what endeavor wants, but it is a direct result of his incredibly selfish and irresponsible attempt to play god, by trying to breed the “perfect” hero into being.

It is how you react when you lose however, that shows who you really are, and endeavor illustrates that very, very well.

Upon being told in no uncertain terms that his attempts at Breeding an heir failed magnificently, producing a child that was not capable of resisting his own immense power, but also admonished by his doctor for even attempting it, and adviced not to try again, Endeavor instead doubled down, while focusing on the child he screwed over from the start with his attempt at genetic manipulation.

It was all for him you see. Endeavor doesnt use those words, but that is how he spins it here. it was all for Touya, all for his sake. if i stop now, then Touya was all for nothing, a mistake, im doing this for my son.

if im doing this for my son, then im not responsible for any of this.

his wife however, calls him out on it, as she understands Touya much, much more than endeavor does. or rather, she sees him fully as a human being, instead of as a thing, a weapon, a failed attempt at an heir.

Unlike Endeavor, Rei is able to see the way this all is affecting her son. She is able to see, and understand that Touya has fully accepted what Endeavor wanted him to be. a stronger, and better version of himself. however, unlike Endeavor, she only cares about him as a person.

Endeavour by comparison isnt completely uncaring about Touya. like most abusive parents, he does possess love for his offspring, but it is forever tainted by the fact that however much he might care, or not care about Touya, any familial love he has for his son is tainted by the fact that to Endeavor, he is a failed experiment, a failed heir, not his child. 

He is the golden child that Endeavor was building up as his true and only heir, who he breed, trained, and molded to for that single purpose, and now that he’s reached a point where he cant continue that legacy.

so, its time to abandon him, and start over new, despite literarily having just learned how stupid this plan was, and that it can, in fact, go completely wrong, with a quirk that will fuck over the person he brings into the world.

Of course, Endeavor doesnt use those words to frame it. there is no way to pretend to be a hero, if you phrase it like that after all. Intead, this is the words he uses.

this is a very important series of panels for a great number of reasons, some that can be debated, argued, and we will probably never know the full truth to the questions because this is a series published in 2020′s shonen jump, and there are things that probably wasnt gonna fly with Hori’s editors, if it was the case.

but lets start with what can not be debated. Endeavor’s words here.

“If we want him to give it up, then we have no choice... Touya... Cant surpass him.”

These are very telling words, and however you believe The third and fourth children of the Todoroki family was concieved, there is not denying the meaning of what he’s saying here.

The only way that my son will stop being an idiot and fall into line, is if we have another baby. that is the only Right way to move forward. it is morally right, because if we dont do this, then he’s going to destroy himself.

there are two ways to interpret this scene.

The charitable way is to read it as the fact that he used Rei’s oldest son’s mental state as a justification of guilting his wife to have a third child, to give this attempt at a superpowered breeding project another shot, despite the fact that they now know that this can lead to a child who is essentially born crippled from his own powers, and despite the fact that Rei obviously understands the effect of them continuing this insanity will have on their oldest son.

the uncharitable way to look at it, is that he used this as justification for flat out raping her, and forcing a third, and then later a fourth child on her.

I personally believe the last one, given a number of factors shown in this chapter(the way this page is framed, the fact Rei obviously didnt want a third child, given she predicted exactly how touya would react, the way her eyes would latet turn when she looks at who is presumably touya which really brings to mind how she would later react to her youngest son’s face after her mental breakdown, etc.), but i’ll frankly admitt that withouth a direct quote from Hori, its impossible to know for sure one way or another. 

either way however, this is a very good example of Endeavor both being influenced by, and using Sunk Cost Fallacy to justify bringing another potentially crippled child into the world for his own, selfish goals.

sunk cost Fallacy, is a mental reaction to when you invest more time and resources into a project, that you becomes so emotionally invested into said project that you will continue to invest into it, even if it reaches a point that it becomes clear that the resources you put into it, far, far outweighs the potential gains you can achieve.

because if you give up after having invested years, and years of effort to breed, raise, and train a kid, and then all that effort was absolutely wasted. hence he choose to keep going, despite having learned what a terrible idea this is.

He doesnt care about the fact that his next child might be even more crippled than his firstborn, he doesnt care about his son’s actual wellbeing. he cares about the fact that if he doesnt continue this insanity, then not only will he not achieve his dreams, but everything he did to get to this point was for absolutely nothing.

and endeavor cannot accept that. and so long as he can justify breeding more children into the world, and there being any chance they might inherit both quirks perfectly, he doesnt care about anything else.

and the moment he realised that this kid wasnt gonna cut it either, he did it again. it is not a coincidence, that the age gap between Endeavor’s second, third, and fourth children were all 3-4 years apart. because thats the age where you can usually tell when a quirk will manifest or not, as established earlier in the series.

While she isnt brought up directly by Endeavor as a justification, it is very telling that Endeavor decided on having a third child, only after his second child was old enough that he could tell that that there was no chance she could take the place as his heir instead.

So, he had his third child, and as time passed and it became obvious that he wasn’t gonna be able to fulfill Endeavor’s goals either, he dumped him, and instead breed a fourth child into existence.

and finally, he struck gold. he did it. he produced Shoto.

everything was finally worth it, and now, everything would be absolutely fine. the cost fallacy had reached its end, and it was now all full sails ahead.

except of course it wasnt.

His oldest son, now in middle school, had been raised from birth to believe he would surpass his father, only to be thrown away, and getting to see his father try to replace him, not once, but twice.

frankly, this scene is probably my favorite in the chapter, because it goes to show Endeavor’s mindset. Natsuo made a point that their father completely ignored his older children. and he did... from Natsuo’s perspective. however, having a more thourough picture of things, we can clearly see that this wasnt the case with Touya.

Endeavor genuinly cared for Touya, enough that once he got that child he tried to breed into existence 4 times, he genuinly wanted him to just abandon trying to be a hero. he genuinly thinks of himself as a good dad here, wanting his son to abandon the mission he set out for him before he was born. of course, with context, this heartwarming scene is incredibly sad and insidious, because we understand why Endeavor got so attached to his oldest child. because he WAS the golden child. he was the child Endeavor genuinly cared about, and invested in, and trained personally with great warmth and enthusiasm.

And not only did he abandon him as a failed project the moment he realized he wasnt gonna live up to his ridiculous standards, but he literarily created 2 more kids to try and replace him, just as his oldest son was old enough to understand what exactly his dad was doing. over the course of this chapter, we get to see Touya’s start as a 5-8 year old, his deteriorating mental state over the years, until he finally seemed to reach the breaking point with Shoto’s birth sometime in his middle school years 12-15. 

Endeavor is in this scene, just not capable of understanding why Touya so desperately wants to become a hero, when obviously he isnt physically able to do so. he isnt able to understand that he is 100% to blame for the fact that his son is having a full emotional breakdown after literaly being replaced by his siblings. 

In other words, Endeavor genuinly think’s he’s a good person. a person who has made a few mistakes along the way sure, but a person who was always justified in the end, and now that he’s having to face the fact that as dabi would later say “The past never dies” and has to face the aftermath of his inane attempt to play god for the pettiest of reasons, things simply arent going to work out.

He isnt going to have a happy family, who can now put the awful early years behind them, he put way too much effort, caused too much suffering and sacrificed too many years of his life for this not to work out as he wants.

after all, if he walks away from this project now, and lets Shoto have a normal childhood, and decide for himself, with no pressure from him, wheter or not to become a hero, then the sunk cost fallacy will have reached a negative end. it will all have been for nothing.

and we know he did eventually double down on this mentality, literarily beating into Shoto that he WAS going to become a hero, and there was not but’s or no’s about it.

there was no way that Endeavor was EVER going to let things be for nothing. His treatment of his older children could not be for nothing. His treatment of his wife could not be for nothing. His treatment of Shoto, and the way he beat him black and blue to train him, could not be for nothing.

Because if it all was for nothing, if everything he feels guilty about was for absolutely nothing, then he was in fact, a bad, bad person, who had no justification for anything he ever did.

#my hero academia #touya todoroki #dabi #endeavor #endeavour #enji todoroki #rei todoroki #character study #301 #meta

[thevibrationofatoms]

"Dionysus wants nothing except for you to be yourself :))"

You know...you know that isn't nothing right? It isnt a non-sacrifice. It's a very uplifting and true message that I see a lot in a couple different Dionysiac circles online but it just always seems framed like that's easy.

Yeah compared to other Hellenistic theoi (or hell even compared to a lot of those old school bronze-age pantheons) Dionysus is pretty chill. A lot of devotees have the same experience of a less rigorous vibe and prayer feeling more relaxed like you're chatting with a friend/mentor figure. (Even in what glimpses of ancient cult practice there are there are mentions of Dionysian cult being less structured with "temples of open air" in the woods and a combination of secret initiation rituals but also an approach of everyone being equal in worship. But ANYWAY I'm getting sidetracked into fun history nerdery, back to the point.)

The point is this is still a god, and a Balls Old one at that. So when you say "this old god wants you to be you" we can't overlook the big implication of what it means when you then devote the idea of You and Your Self Improvement/Bettering to a Balls Old God. Being your best self involves uncomfortable self awareness and introspection, it's uneasy and challenging and it takes work. Hell it may take sacrifice of one type or another in life.

And it's not something that I think people are gonna get hurt with, or like it's gonna be a "don't get in over your head" but with growing online interest in Dionysus as a liberator I do think it's good to be aware of what a relationship with an old god could entail.

It may feel like you are, in effect, putting yourself on the metaphorical altar as the sacrifice. If you're asked to strive and try to be the true you, and you agree, you're gonna be held to it. Trying for your best is going to look different every day, and failure is involved, but the trying will be expected.

And this may feel different to different levels of devotion for people. I'm mostly speaking from my experience as someone who got hit with a metaphysical pinecone and went full Maenad, where it has at times felt like getting grabbed by the scruff of the neck and being forced to go through tumblrs dreaded Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known.

I'm definitely ADHD rambling via text, but I think my point may be directed at people I see who are like, wondering how they can get a deeper connection and asking for the right prayers or the best altar items and more standard ritual stuff. And that all may help you get into the mindset and visualization may help, but I see some stressing that they can't seem to make that connection or that they may not have an altar.

So maybe what I'm getting to is that if that's the case, remember that you are reaching out to an old god whose themes often involve releasing and giving in to a primal, more true and real version of you and accepting that. If you are striving for a deeper connection, that mindset may help you out more.

#dionysus #the dionysian spiral #dionysian #dionysos #dionysus devotion #hellenism #i may delete this later im kinda thinking out loud via tumblr post #its a response thats been brewing about in my head to the very UwU flavored posts about 'just be yourself!' #and im like #ok but that can also be hard #and maybe uh remember what may be implied if youre gonna say Being You is what you give to ancient gods of dichotomies and nature

[bonny-kookoo]

Mean (JJK x Reader) 💜☁️✴️🔞

💸 Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader

💸 Genre: Mafia!AU, Single Parent AU!, Angst, fluff, Smut

💸 Warnings: bad language aka cursing, mentions of cheating, mentions of illegal business, manhandling and not the nice kind, tsundere Jungkook, it’s not like he likes you duh, guns, description of violence, restriction of movement and not in a kinky way, protected sex because dude he’s got one kid okay that’s enough, unconventional romance, choking, near death experience, angst did I mention angst

💸 Summary: Jeon Jungkook was kinda cute, you had to admit that- but he was also a massive douchebag with his head up his ass. And a cute kid.

A/N: First of all, I want to apologize to anyone I might dissapoint with this. I've changed up the story concept numerous times- and the first trailer is in no way a proper teaser anymore, since it has nothing to do with this story anymore. I somehow hope you still enjoy the story however. If not- I hope you'll stick around for future content!

Taglist: @drumsofheaven @yzkyzkuniverse @strwberrybtch @kirbykook @teresaisla @park-hera-gi @justzeera @taestannie @bambuzlee (there were several people I couldn’t tag- I’m sorry about that!) 

Jeon Jungkook was facing his worst enemy.

Now, considering his work and all those rumors going on about him, this could be anything really; from an entire army storming his house, to readying himself for waterboarding. But no, this enemy he was currently standing across from was way more vile and difficult to get under control. The situation was slowly growing desperate on his side- this was a life and death situation.

"Mina, come on now." Jungkook pleaded as the toddler vehemently refused to raise her arms properly so he could slip on her dress for the day. He could understand her, to an extend- he wasn't a morning person either, but he had to overcome this in order to be successful- and she had to as well.

Well, success was not really that important at her age, but getting her to daycare definitely was.

"Mina I have a meeting soon and if you continue to be a brat I can't send you off again properly." He tried, knowing how much she hated him leaving in a rush like usually. He'd promised her the day prior as he'd tucked her into bed that he would, this time, at least stay until her friends had arrived, yet he couldn't have known that this situation would occur the next morning.

Sometimes being a single father was way worse than anything he was facing at his actual job.

"There we go!" He cheered as she finally caved in, pouting a bit before she giggled at the silly face her father was making in order to get her to smile. He hated sending her off in a foul mood, knowing that she could be an absolute devil's child if she felt like it. In a way, she was very similar to him, which was to be expected with her mother not being in the picture. He didn't mind it much, however- a cheating spouse was not really what he wanted by his side, if he was being entirely honest with himself. It was enough already knowing that almost all of his 'friends' and 'business partners' were shameless liars. He didn't need to live and raise a child with one as well.

"Tiger!" The young girl cheerfully exclaimed, as the both made their way into the kitchen. It wasn't just a random comment from her side, because her chubby hand already pointed at the cereal box designed with colorful images on the counter, way too high for her but perfectly reachable for her father as he chuckled, balancing her on his hip as he prepared a small bowl for her.

"No funny business though, young lady." He said, as he sat down with her at the table. "We don't have to hurry, but we can't waste time either." He explained, as he watched her eat her breakfast with a concentrated face. He smiled at the picture, sometimes wishing this would be how his days would always start. Sadly, that wasn't the case- most of the times really, her nanny took her to daycare.

Which was another problem.

Her nanny had recently filed in for her termination, her age getting to her as she finally made the decision to settle down for her last years of life, she'd said. He accepted it without much resistance, having build too much respect for the elderly woman over the course of time by now. It left him with a gaping hole however, one that he knew he needed to fill.

But with who?

He couldn't just hire anybody for Mina at this point in his life. People needed to be fully trustworthy to be even given knowledge of his child at all. Most didn't even know she existed- the public unaware of her relation to him. He kept the facade up that she was merely the child of a close friend, just to keep her out of range of any potential enemies he had gathered over time.

His life really wasn't fit for a child at all, but what was he supposed to do?

"Y/N!" A small voice exclaimed behind you, making you look around from where you were cutting apples as the small child appeared.

"Mina!" You answered just as brightly, picking her up as she giggled excitedly. "Did you have breakfast yet?" You asked, as another daycare worker came inside.

"Yeah!" She said, and you looked at her surprised. "Daddy and I had breakfast!" She explained, as you placed her back down onto the ground. "He'ven brought me here today!" She said, and you hummed affirmatively,

"That sounds awesome!" You said, as she beamed up at you. "Why don't you go sit at the table, we're almost having our morning snack. You think you can eat some apples?" You asked, and she proudly nodded, before zooming off, stumbling a bit as she missed the slight gap of the door.

"He didn't come inside." Jenny said, as she watched the little girl sit down next to a boy her age. "I saw that he was sitting in his car, but she got out herself." She explained further, as you continued cutting the apples and making some cuts to have them resemble a bunny. "I swear to god-" She started, as you cut her off.

"We don't know what his life is like, Jenny." You said, as she huffed. "It's not our kid, it's not our life. She isn't unhappy, she's healthy, she's not mistreated. Case closed." You explained further as you discarded the scraps of apple unneeded in the trash, before rinsing the knife you'd used. "I'm not too happy about it either, but we're not her mother." You said, as you dried your hands.

Jenny sighed. "I know, but like-" She said, walking over to you to help you place the banana slices and grapes as well. "She's such a sweet kid. I don't know, but he seems like such a dick honestly. Like, have you heard his phonecall last week?" You snorted. Everyone did at this point.

Mina had had a minor incident, when she'd stumbled and fell. She'd scraped her knee, cried a little, but after a moment everything had been fine again. He however, had been livid upon finding out his daughter had been hurt, even though the scratches didn't even need a bandaid. Even though he'd only been on the phone with your superior, he'd made such a scene out of it that it became like local news around the daycare.

"I still don't know what the fuck that was about." Jenny exclaimed, taking a sip of her coffee as she kept an eye on the kids in the main room. "Like, yeah, she fell, but nothing happened." She said, and you agreed.

Shrugging, you grabbed some plates and napkins, and looked at Jenny. "Again." You reminded her. "As harsh as it sounds, you know me." Jenny sighed.

"I know."

You took back everything you had said this morning.

This prick had the audacity to keep you waiting for more than two hours now, without reacting to any amount of phonecalls you'd done by now. Mina was almost asleep on your lap, and you were angry to say the least. This was supposed to be your last day of work for a week, you were supposed to be curled up on your couch in nothing but underwear and fluffy socks, hidden by a blanket and eating icecream while watching netflix. You were definitely not supposed to sit here at your daycare until even the janitor was about to go home. "Fuck it." You mumble, carefully balancing the young girl on your hip as you grab your bag and keys.

You wave the janitor and cleaning staff goodbye on their way out, and take out your phone for a bus or subway that could drive close to where Mina's address is- but you notice there is nothing in her jacket written that you could use as one. You instead simply call the number written down for emergencies, and wait as it rings.

once.

twice.

"Hello?"

You are a bit taken aback by the voice on the other line, masculine, but clearly not as old as you'd thought he'd sound. "Uh, yeah, this is Mina's daycare, you mind picking her up these days, or not?" You casually say, Mina moving around a bit as to bring her thumb close to her lips. You internally coo at her.

"Shit! Fuck- I, where are you?" He asks, and you furrow your brows. Where the hell does he think you are, or does he seriously not know where his daughters daycare is? Wait, is that even her father?

"I- listen, am I even talking to her father or who is this?" You ask, and suddenly you feel extremely uncomfortable. This was a bad idea, what if this isnt her dad at all? You could loose your job for this!

"Yeah, yes. Listen I'm gonna send someone to pick her up alright? Should be there in an hour or so." He says as if frustrated, and you scoff, making him question you on the other line as if he was just struck by thunder. "Excuse me?" He says, voice low, but you're not intimitated.

"First of all, I'm not convinced. Second of all, and pardon my french, but are you nuts?! It's already way too late for her to be up, and I've finished my shift hours ago!" You complain, and he clears his throat over the line, clearly unhappy about your lack of understanding.

"Jeon Mina has a small beauty mark underneath her lower lip, she hates strawberries for some reason, and her biggest secret is that she is actually scared of unicorns. There, happy?" He grits out, and you chew on your lip. He was good. "Second of all, Miss." He makes sure to pronounce every word. "You're getting paid to look after my kid. If that's all you want I'm paying you extra for the inconvenience-" Oh boy, there we go.

"If I cared about your stupid money I would've called authorities hours ago, S.I.R." You start, careful to tone your voice down as to not wake her up. "And you know what, thats a great Idea actually! Let me just-" You begin, but he cuts you off with a sound that sounds awfully like a door closing.

"Fuck you, I'm there in 20." He says.

Jeon Jungkook was not too fond of woman.

That much was clear ever since he'd been cheated on and left with a kid, but it had always been like that. It wasn't like he was afraid of them, or didn't like them, it was more like, during his life, woman had been the reason for heartbreak and bad news all along. His mother had been an alcoholic, his dad desperately trying to get her back on track. His sister had been involved into shady business early on, a wild child that would do anything to get on peoples nerves. His aunt, which only ever visited to gain money. Women were bad news.

So his own surprise had been very prominent when he spotted you on the bench with his kid in your arms,her chubby arms clinging onto you like a koala. You seemed to be reading something on your phone, careful not to point the device too close to Mina so she wouldn't be disturbed. You were pretty, he had to admit that, even from far away- and you seemed like a confident person, from what he'd heard over the phone. You suddenly noticed him as he drove a bit closer, car tires crunching the gravel and snow underneath while his headlights shut off, to not blind you both. He stepped out, as you woke Mina up to announce to her that her father had finally arrived.

"Daddy!" She screached sleepily, running towards him with stumbling legs. He picked her up with a smile before he turned around, having every intention to buckle her up in his backseat as you came closer.

"Huh. Mind telling me why I shouldn't inform authorities about this?" You asked, and he huffed out a breath with a roll of his eyes, pulling out his wallet. You simply stood there, arms crossed, not at all fazed by the amount of money he held in front of you- you simply raised your eyebrow. "I mean, if money could talk I'd ask your bills, sure. But that right there isn't an answer." You replied, and he gritted his teeth, jaw clenching. Why were you being so difficult.

"Okay, how much?" He said, and you suddenly moved, shifted, as if absolutely offended by his offer.

"Do I look like a streetworker to you sir?" You said, and he closed his eyes for a moment, until another car seemed to pull up.

"You're getting picked up." He says, ready to step into his car as you look at him with confusion. "You don't know them?" He asks, and you shake your head, having every intention to check as he notices something familiar peeking out of one of the car windows. As if on autopilot, he rips his passenger side open, pushes you in, and runs to get inside the drivers seat.

There are shots fired, Mina is holding her hands over her ears as she simply stares at you, who is absolutely shell-shocked.

What the hell just happened?

So yeah, that's how you got here-

In a room that looked awfully like the interrogation rooms in your late night netflix crime shows. There was someone sitting in front of you- Mina's father, watching you, like you were going to do anything. But you were as quiet as a mouse, not saying anything.

"So you didn't know them? At all?" He questioned for the second time in the past ten minutes, and you shook your head. "Hard to believe. Then again, why would you ever tell me that your Dad's brother was sentenced to two years for escorting drugs- only getting two years because he snitched." He said, and your eyes widened.

"Okay what the hell-" You started, but he cut you off.

"Oh, I hit a nerve-" But you weren't having it.

"Oh an I'm gonna hit your pretty nose if you don't stop cutting me off!" You said, making him smirk. For some reason, this was quite entertaining to him- the only woman he ever had in here were so keen on keeping up that shy and innocent facade, that you were a breath of fresh air. "Listen, I don't know why you decided to dig up things that happened when I was literally a TODDLER- or how you even got that information - I swear to god I will really break your nose!" You ended as he had tried to speak again, making him chuckle.

If you weren't being held captive after getting your night ruined you might as well would've thought that was pretty hot.

"I was five years old- I had nothing to do with it, and my dad had no contact whatsoever with his brother after what had happened." You explained. "If you can find that, you can also find that I haven't had contact with my family in years either." You said, leaning back, as he spoke.

"I did. Which is quite confusing to me." He said.

You suddenly went stone cold on him. "It really isnt that deep." You said.

"Were you avoiding them?" He asked. "Because of what happened? Or because your dad got involved into something?"

"Because they're dead." You said.

Well. This was something that made him actually stop and think for a second. He did dig into that nasty part of your family, but he never looked further- their death was something he had overlooked. And by your reaction as you said it, the way you said it, he knew that you weren't lying. "Alright." He said. "But you do realize that I can't just let you go like that, right?" He said.

"Figured." You said. "So, should I stand facing against the wall or with my back against it so you can aim better?" You said, and he took a deep breath. Technically, yes, that would be a logical outcome.

"Neither." He said, and you raised your eyebrow. "I have an offering." He said, and your entire body went stiff, arms crossing in front of your chest. A pure sign of whatever he was going to say, your first reaction would be no. "I need a nanny for Mina." He said, and your lips parted, confusion clear on your face.

He almost thought it was kind of cute.

"You what?" You said.

"I need a nanny for Mina." He repeated. "It's a win-win situation for both of us if you think about it. You get to- in a way- keep your job and a bonus in terms of payment, and I will have someone to take care of Mina. And I also don't have to put a bullet into your pretty little head." He said, leaning forward with the last words.

"This isn't really a question, isn't it?" You said, and he laughed.

"You're smart- I like you."

„But that’s not how daddy does it..“ she wonders, as you tie her shoes for her, before looking up into her eyes. She really does resemble her father. Well, a more innocent version, that is.

„Well everyone does it differently.“ you say, well aware that there were numerous ways to tie a simple bow. „Your daddy probably has learned it from someone who does it like he does. I learned it from my dad.“ you explained as you went to pick up her backpack, carrying it for her as she took your hand.

„yours looks prettier tho!“ she exclaimed happily, a skip in her step as she kept looking at her shoes with a smile. You grinned, a sense of pride filling you. „Daddy‘s always looks crooked on one side-„ she said, before a voice broke through the sweet moment.

„You hurt me Princess. You always said they look nice.“ he hummed from his spot in the doorway, leaned on the frame, looking at you with something you could only describe as unsatisfied, while shooting his daughter a smile.

What the hell have you done wrong now?

This had been something going on for months now. Ever since you started working for him as a nanny, Mina had been nothing but a ray of sunshine- but he, he was not even a raincloud. He was the angry grinch miltiplied by a hundred, ready to piss everyone off twenty-five-eight. Somehow everything you did wasn't up to his standards; the way you cooked for Mina, the way you dressed her, hell, even right now with the way you tied a fucking bow.

You really hoped next time he washed his hands, his sleeves would roll down.

"There's an emergency gun underneath the back-" He started as Mina was out of listening-reach.

"I won't use it." You said.

Jungkook had tried to get you trained at least in the basics of guns- but you practically had an allergy to it, refusing to so much as touch one. He didn't quite know what your problem was, but after a while, he had given up on it- simply sending one of his guards with you whenever he could. By now, you were an easy target as well if found alone, so you had joined him in his place, occupying one of the larger guest rooms. He had said that it was to keep an eye on you, but internally, he simply didn't want you to get hurt.

And yeah, at first that was because he didn't trust you, at all- but by now, somehow, you had sneaked your way into his heart, in a way. Even though he himself would always grumpily comment on it, he loved how you made Mina smile and the entire mansion light up. Things felt a little brighter, a little less tense, and a little less lonely with you around. It felt as if you were an actual family.

And that scared the shit out of him, because in no way was he going to fall for his daughters nanny.

And, after all; you hated his guts.

If Jungkook knew the situation you and Mina had gotten yourselves into, you don't know if he would be proud of her or kill you.

Turns out that the guard Jungkook had sent you out with wasn't actually following his orders at all, but words from a different person entirely- you imagined they were highly likely the one's out to shoot you back when you first met the tall mafia boss and father. Now, the only thing they definitely did not get right however, was that you were Mina's mother- and someone Jungkook valued enough to give up his safety. This was true for Mina; the young child was his everything, and he'd cut off his limbs just to know her safe and sound- but you? That was just absolutely stupid. Sure, you've been living together for quite some time now, and he stopped trying to mentally push you down the stairs every morning as well. But there was nothing more than a mild case of friend- and partnership. You weren't being emo; Jungkook had, after all, said it again and again that he had crossed out the dating game. He's got enough trouble with Mina and you, he had said.

Well, seemed like one of those issues would solve itself.

"Again, what're you gonna do?" You say, as Mina looks at you from out of the vents above you had helped her into seconds ago.

"Crawl where the nice air is, call daddy- and don't look back." She repeats proudly, but you can see it clearly that she's just as scared as you are.

"Exactly, good job princess." You praise, and she nods with a pout. "Once daddy gets you, you'll be safe." You promise, and she wants to complain- but you don't let her, closing the vent again as you hear her shuffling away. This was fine. Mina would be safe, Jungkook would have one person less to worry about- he could move away, bring her to a different part of the country where no one knew her, and she could simply go to school next year and forget all of this ever happened.

You were just a bit sad that you'd never get to see it.

Of course you weren't her mother- but it was hard not to let her inside your heart, with the way she was. The charms her dad didn't have, she got them times ten. She was just so sweet, and you were around her all the time, it was hard not to somehow grow fond of her. You just hoped she'd be alright.

"Where's the kid, whore?!" A guard yelled after noticing you were the only one left in the room. You simply smiled, not answering, before he grabbed your neck, pulling you up as much as he could as he fumed. "Save that stupid grin for your son of a bitch at home." He barks, and you desperately try to breathe- unsuccessfully so, until he forcefully pushes you back down, the back of your head hiding the concrete floor with a sickening crack. You squealed out in pain, holding onto the spot for dear life as if that would somehow help it- but it didn't. "I knew sluts like you have to be tied up. You're all just trouble." He says, pulling you by your legs as another set of people come in, binding your legs and hands. You can already feel your fingers getting cold from how tight your wrists are tied- but you black out from the kick to your stomach before you can quite dwell on it.

"Fuck!" He yells, before he gets up, hands in his hair to somehow help himself not punch the laptop on his table. He's seen it, seen it all- from the moments you would shield Mina like a fearless lioness, the second you had lifted her up into the vents even though he knew your shoulder had to be in horrible pain, to the very moment you had faced the consequences of your actions. He hated that he had to wait, that he had to simply sit here in his office like a coward just to watch you take the beatings.

Because here was the thing with Jungkook; even though he liked to portray himself as someone who always takes the upper hand in things and troubles, when it came to his own personal life far away from his criminal business he ran, he couldn't seem to ever make up his mind. It was like a repeat of his past love affair- but instead of his ex-wife cheating and leaving him with a child, there was you, in some way fighting like a true lionness in order to keep said child safe and sound, even though you didn't even had to. Technically, this would've been the perfect opportunity for you to finally get your freedom back in a way. Because without Mina, there was no use for you being in his grasp anymore. Without her, there was no agreement between the two of you.

And yet there you were. And yet again, he simply watched, simply did nothing.

The entire mansion was already on high alert by now; his most trusted friends Seokjin and Yoongi already out to your location- he could wait. He could wait. He could wait.

Everything would somehow turn out to be just fine by the end of this day. He would successfully take his daughter into his arms, Yoongi and Seokjin would get you out of there, and after a good nights sleep and some first aid for you, things would just return to normal.

But what was normal at this point?

He didn't want things to continue like they did currently. He wanted change, for the first time in his life. He wanted to tell you about his inner thoughts, about his desires concerning you and his future. He wanted to tell you that he didn't just want you to be at his home and with him and his daughter just because of some stupid agreement. He didn't want you to stay with him because he forced you to.

His phone began to chime, your face greeting him as the caller ID as he accepts it. "Daddy-" His heart sinks down to the floor as he hears Mina sniffle on the other side of the line. He has to wait, he thinks, repeats like a mantra. He has to somehow calm her down, tell her everything's alright- "They're hurting mommy!" Mina wails, and somehow, those words make him snap.

Fuck waiting.

In a way, Mina was a smart kid. She had been nothing but understanding when Jungkook and her mother had broken up- divorced, and fought until she eventually left for good. She had been a little sad for a long time, thinking it had somehow been her fault; but he had assured her, and later on, explained, that Mommy simply didn't love Daddy anymore. In Daycare, she was one of the most well behaved kids ever encountered- careful, and calm. Of course she got excited and happy and sometimes made a mess; but she also was very careful who she interacted with, what kinds of friends she made, and how much she talked about home. She never complained, never threw public tantrums.

Jungkook truly was lucky- that the only thing left of his shattered marriage had been her.

He never had relationships after that- never dated, never truly searched for someone. No one, in his eyes, was worth the risk- and even after meeting you, that was his opinion. But as cliche as it sounded, you were quite different from anyone he'd ever met before.

You spoke your mind; always saying what bothered you, never beating around the bush. Yet, you weren't being a bitch about things. No, you actually could be pretty cute if you wanted to be- be it the moments he had caught you and Mina sneak a taste of her birthday cake in the middle of the night, or the one time he had been sick.

You had been such an angel to him.

Helping him towards the bathroom, never even scrunching your nose in distaste whenever he had to throw up. You simply rubbed his back, helping him towards the sink to rinse, just to lead him back into his bedroom. You had aired the room out, made the bed, made sure that he was staying hydrated and at least tried to eat every day- all without any complains.

Maybe that was the moment his perspective of you shifted into dangerous territory.

He had somehow become hyperaware of the things you did. How well you got along with Mina, how easy going you were becoming with him- how confident yet nurturing and sweet you were, gently scolding him sometimes to not overwork himself. You always made sure his kid felt happy and was healthy, never so much as whined about your past friendships lost; you had simply accepted the new situation.

In a way, you were what he silently dreamed of at night.

Because as much as he loved the sight of you holding Mina whenever she had a nightmare and couldn't sleep, he somehow also craved to be held throughout the night by your arms. Just like he held his daughter in that moment after she had climbed out of the vent into his arms. He could make out some of her words as he simply let himself feel her tiny body in his arms for a moment. Just to make sure she was really there, really alright, really out of harms way. She kept on crying out for you, for him to help you, to save you-

So it was only natural for him to jump out of his car and run after Seokjin, Yoongi, and their squad, as they entered the building.

Sometimes at night, when you got aware of all the different sounds of the room, you heard the blood rush inside your brain.

Just like now; but now, it was so loud that you could barely hear anything else. Things seemed hazy, fuzzy, your ears stuffed with cotton wool drowning out any sounds might happening around you. Your eyes stayed closed, light way too bright for your raging headache- and the stale metal taste on your tongue wasn't helping either. Your hands had started to tingle long ago, and your knees were hurting from being in the same position for this long. But the moment someone touched you next, it wasn't forceful. It was so gentle, and almost- scared?

You couldn't hear, but you could feel. How the rope was cut, blood rushing painfully into your hands and legs again, pins and needles making them hypersensitive as you were suddenly held- moved, carried?

It smelled like home, that was something your dizzy mind was able to properly make out. It smelled like Jungkooks mansion, and a bit like his office- a faint vanilla hitting your senses, making you faintly smile as your hand reached out, unknowingly grabbing his shirt, holding the fabric as tight as you could as you moaned out in pain when he placed you down again, warmth surrounding you.

Maybe you were dying?

Or maybe not.

Because after some hazy and confusing dreams, you slowly came back to your senses. Eyes opening slowly, there it was; the curtains you knew so well, the balcony opened, air crisp and fresh around you as the door opened. You wanted to move your head, but the fear of triggering another headache was too big.

"Y/N?" Jungkooks voice asked, warm, and almost hesitant. You hummed, and he snapped his head around, noticing that yes- after days of sleeping and slipping in and out of consciousness you were actually awake again. He walked into your field of vision, looking so casual; his white button up undone at the first two buttons, sleeves rolled up as he sat down close to you, palm on the blanket covering you as he-

smiled?

"W-" You had to cough a bit before clearing your throat. "Who are you and what have you done to Jungkook?" You said, and he chuckled, sighing in relief- you had, after all, not lost your charm.

"I think past Jungkook had a moment of self-reflection." He said, watching you as his hand placed itself onto yours, warmth spreading over your skin. "I'm glad you're okay." He admitted. "And thank you. For keeping.. Mina safe." He ended, and you smiled.

"That's literally my job." You said, and he got more serious.

"No, and you know what I mean." His voice was deep and rough, yet held no authority like usual. "You had chances to tell them who you were. That you had no connection to me other than through her; yet you didn't. And we both know why." He said, and you looked at him.

"There are more reasons than just one." You said, eyes drifting to his now empty ring finger on the hand resting on his thigh.

"Does it matter which one I mean?" He asked, and you wanted to scoff.

"It does to me." You said, and he shifted closer after a second, properly holding your hand now as he looked at yours- still a little scratched, but nothing that wouldn't heal.

"You did it because that's the reason you live here." He said. "You also did it because you adore her just as much as I do. And you.." He began, but grew unsure.

"And I?" You smiled, and he looked at you with his typical seriousness.

"And you somehow got stuck in an emotional mess." He explained. "You somehow, deep down, wanted it to be true." His thumb moved over the back of your hand as he spoke. "You wished that.. maybe there was more to it than just, partnership." He said, and you still smiled gently.

"Did I now?" You teased, but to your surprise, he was still looking straight at you.

"I know I did." He humms out. "I still do."

"You're stupid." You said, and he laughed bitterly, taking your words the wrong way as he slipped his out of yours.

"I know." He said, getting up to leave but stopped as you spoke.

"Good." You said, chuckling before coughing. "What, no kiss for me after all I've been through?" You giggled as his wide eyes stared at you. "Rude." You said, and he suddenly realized that no- you weren't rejecting him. You were accepting.

You felt the same.

Noticing his own awkwardness, he leaned over, hands supporting his body as he leaned down, properly placing his lips onto yours. You had never imagined what kissing Jungkook would feel like, but you certainly would've never guessed how gentle and absolutely loving it would be. One of his hands moved towards your cheek, holding it, as if you were the most precious thing he'd ever seen.

"Mommy!" Came Mina's excited voice, cries instantly noticable as she jumped onto the bed, burying her head into your chest as you held her, a few tears in your eyes from her jumping.

"Mina baby, be careful okay?" He said. But your words were the reason that he ended up tearing up, at the end.

"Mommy's still hurting baby." You said. "But she'll get better soon."

Not even during the first few magical months of being together with his past ex, had it ever felt like this.

He was euphoric almost; with the way you felt, moved, breathed. It all felt like so much to him, made him feel so.. He couldn't explain it. He had his hands on your hips, fingers careful not to press too hard, but having enough force to move you back and forth over his lap- his length moving in and out of your heat, making you whine, as he watched your breasts in front of him. You fit so perfectly like this, felt so amazing, managed to make him feel needy instead of the other way around.

He turned you over slipping out of you sloppily as he moved positions, now above you as he spread your legs, entering you again easily. He pulled you by your thighs, holding you in place as he began to thrust again, your eyes closing with every movement of his hips.

He loved the sight of it.

Deep down he wanted to take the condom off; he wanted to fill you up, cum inside over and over and over until your cunt would overflow. Not only just to claim you in a weird animalistic sense, but to also make his family complete. He had cut his ties to his illegal activities by now, had settled down with you- and he knew, there was no other person he'd ever have a child with again than with you. "I want to cum inside." He said breathlessly, making you whine in return. "Hm, you'd like that?" He asked teasingly, his thrusts gaining more strength as if to underline his statement. "Stuff you full of my cum, make you leak it and mess up the sheets.." He continues, hand reaching between the two of you to find your clit. "just to make love to you over and over again. I wanna make you cry." He gritted out, suddenly moving you around face down. He pulled up your lower body, entering you again, gliding in easily with the amount of slick you were leaking. "And you'd take it wouldn't you?" He asks, making you nod and groan out as he grows more desperate, faster, harder- throwing you off the edge but never stopping. "You're gonna take it until I cum, don't you dare move away from me." He scolds, holding you tightly, making you gasp out in overstimulation as he continues on, chasing his own high.

He reaches it with a loud groan, burying himself deep inside as he holds you, peppering kisses onto your spine. "I love you, hm.." He whispers out. "So good, so pretty.. all mine.." He huffs, simply falling onto the mattress with you in his arms, cock still buried inside you.

There was a moment of silence, until he spoke again. "I really do mean it though." He said earning only a tired humm from you. He simply chuckled at that, holding you close as he decided to maybe bring that topic up when the timing was a bit better.

For once, he felt like a normal person. Right next to you, in your arms, as you turned around to pull him close, burying your face into his chest.

Right where he belonged.

#jeon jungkook imagine #jeon jungkook #jungkook imagine #jk imagine #jungkook x reader #bts imagine #mafia bts #mafia jungkook #bts smut #jungkook smut

[enderspawn]

anyway uh. idk if ill post doodles or not yet BUT important notes for my indulgent quick jrwi mlp au:

riptide and black rose crews intentionally designed together bc i fuck w those parallels so hard: arlin and chip are earth ponies, drey and jay are pegasi, and finn and gillion are unicorns. both so all crews have even mix of three, but also to reflect alrin+chip's simple non-magic side, drey+jay's bird symbolism, and finn+gill's magic/casting focus compared to their crewmates

chip still has the arlin earring, but in this case arlin's cutie mark was a gold axe (possibly w waves behind it?? or the waves are just a coat pattern like w pipsqueak, OR the bg of the cutie mark a la luna)

all the ferins have some kind of wing or bird in their cutie marks, like how the apple family all has apples-- both to symbolize the family bond but also works as freedom symbolism for drey and jay (possibly most have birds/feathers and they have Just Wings to push symbolism??? to be decided)

-- drey's looks a LOT like the canon emblem, w a side facing bird in front of a circle, but the circle is actually meant to represent the barrel of a gun. if family emblem exists in canon in this au, adds extra Hurt that he became a pirate.

-- jay's cutie mark is an open set of wings w a sunset/sunrise behind them. ties in general sun/fire theming AND represents a new change, a "new day" for her as she becomes and accepts being a pirate

undecided if i'll go thru w it yet (bc it depends on individual character design), but POSSIBLY the riptide jolly roger is literally Made Up of components from everyone's cutie marks: wings from jay, coral from gill, crack from chip

gill and finn both also share parts of their cutie marks to show their relation to one another (undecided, but likely?)

-- working rn w both cutie marks having tentacles in it-- for finn it's coming out/on top of of a page, to show his academic side + study of aquatic life. for gillion, it's on the blade/hilt of the sword (like in canon) to reflect how he was raised as a weapon.

-- alt gill designs include coral design or a design of a full moon + waves to represent the prophecy

-- also i know gillion being a non-pony makes the most sense and they LITERALLY have an aquatic race in canon but. i just dont like em enough JKDFSJKL sorry hes a horse until i can change my own mind

niklaus cutie mark is either the moon he gave gill (minus letters?), n gill gets niklaus' cutie mark instead of the canon mark, OR he has some kind of 6-pointed cutie mark (due to 6 points being used in mlp canon to represent fate/destiny, a la the main 6 and twilight's cutie mark)

ALSO like stated in prev tags: chip got his cutie mark immediately after the hole in the sea. like when he woke up type beat. and im leaning towards it being a whirlpool design (or a crack?? something chipped????). which means the universe decided his Special Fate and talent is lowkey his Big Trauma :tm: AND it means that he had no one to celebrate getting a cutie mark (which is a Big Deal in universe) with bc he just lost his WHOLE fam.

-- i imagine in au just like how chip has this Massive Hero Worship thing, he looked up to the black rose and was always SO excited for when he got his mark and was like "mines gonna be SO much cooler!!" or "I hope i get one like your!!" etc. and then. :))))

-- ALSO this isnt 100% purposeless angst, cutie marks are meant to reflect your like... Future? like what you're Meant to Do by fate's design or whatever. and like said by others before, chip wasn't meant to exist at all. thus, his mark reflects the moment that came true.

#im not gonna main tag this soz fjdkslf #og post #-- bits are meant as like. bullet points under the above paragraph. they're related sub thoughts #also under cut bc it got a lil long lol #mlp au #(jeb bush voice) please clap