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#because he was clueless about it
petitabricot · 2 months
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phil dunphy and "innocent" incompetence
Rewatching modern family and it's shocking to me how Phil Dunphy for a very long time was pushed by MF fans as the ideal husband. At first glance, he is a goofball, kind husband with childlike wonder who helps counterbalance Claire's uptightness and seriousness.
But in reality, Phil is like what many men are expected to be in their married relationships : useless. He is completely useless to Claire, which she brings up all the time : lets her do all the chores, all of the home rearing tasks even though he works so little he might as well be a stay at home husband. Him being so childish and refusing to enforce boundaries with his own children by acting like an adult is a very funny joke for a sitcom, but if it were real life it would make Phil a terrible husband, father and a complete burden on Claire who now has to take care of her husband's incompetence on top of raising her 3 children. If you've ever been in a situation where you had to work with someone else, but the other person doesn't know how to make themselves useful, so you have no choice but to micromanage them, then you KNOW how exhausting that is, even more so than doing it alone.
And before people "it's just a sitcom, it's not real" I KNOW. But there are so many people who watch this show and genuinely believe that Phil is great. I read a post raising the same concerns as me, and people were like "Phil is clueless, so he's harmless" and honestly something sparked in my brain. Women are always expected to forgive men's complete incompetence because they are "clueless". Running a household is after all a woman's task, and men can't be expected to ever learn how to do it, even if they're married with 3 kids. So women need to just happily accept the heavy burden, and accept to deal with a manchild as a husband. Not only do they have to accept this burden, but they should be grateful.
As if that alone wasn't enough, Phil constantly disrespects Claire. The fact that people (and that includes me on first watch), think his behaviour towards his own wife is funny is telling. He is constantly disrespectful of her, openly flirting with other women and openly crossing the line, such as staring at other women when his own wife is talking to him or hesitating when others flirt with him. And people say "oh but it's normal to still be attracted to others when you're married!" but there's a complete difference between attraction and his sleazy behaviour. That's what annoys me so much, not Phil Dunphy who is a gimmick character, but people who are insisting his behaviour is totally acceptable and that's just what a normal, healthy marriage looks like. The whole show, Phil belittles Claire, jokes about her uptightness even though she has to be strict because she literally gets no help, even makes a "marriage is prison" joke (which Claire does call him out on it), he has the most divorced dad energy I've ever seen. And yet people expect women to see him as a perfect cute baby husband who is harmless, and not what he actually is, a grown fucking man.
I keep thinking about how many of my girlfriends dated incompetent, lazy, dependent and pathetic men and excused their behaviour saying "oh no he just doesn't understand thesse things!" "yeah he forgot my birthday for the 3rd time in a row but you know how he is!" "oh yeah i hate it when he does that but you know how guys are!" Women constantly give men the benefit of the doubt (while never offering women the same benefit) and they use it to get away with being more useless.
This just sums up a big problem I have with dating. Women from birth to adulthood are raised into being the perfect wives and eventually the perfect mothers. I mean just look at the women in MF, Claire, a perfect household leader who takes care of everything that needs to be done for her family while her husband gets away with being a disney dad, and Gloria, the hot trophy woman who giggles and makes snarky replies when her husband throws racist or objectifying comments at her. They have created fantasy stereotypes of what a woman should be like that caters to men (all while denegrating said fantasies), but have never done so for men. Men are not, and have never been taught to be good husbands and fathers. The few advice they get on this does not come from women, or with women's needs in mind, but from other men, with the idea of impressing other men down the line.
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morganbritton132 · 5 months
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Eddie gets tagged in a Tiktok of one of Steve’s students. Steve clearly has some kind of cold because he keeps having to stop his lesson to cough into his elbow. The caption on the video is like, “@ [Eddie’s handle] how did you let this happen???”
But more importantly and even funnier, in the video you can hear a student respond to Steve sneezing so hard it looked painful with, “Mr Harrington, you’re giving me the ick.”
Steve’s just like, “Don’t worry. I’m not contagious.”
The student says, “…Nevermind.”
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seasicksilver · 1 month
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good old times
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lollytea · 11 days
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I need to watch Sharpay's Fabulous Adventure to reach my final conclusion on if she's even attracted to men
#girl help i keep thinking about sharpay and ryan being each others only friend growing up#theyre not very good at interpersonal relationships#romance is foreign to them. they dont care about playing romantic interests because they only view romance through the lens of theatre#fake. not real. an act to entertain an audience. so they dont understand why it would be weird#neither of them have ever kissed anyone#sharpay likes things that make her look better#because her whole life is a performance#so she wants troy because hes a shiny accessory to her#thinking about hsm 2 where once again when she tries to perform a romantic song (with troy this time and not her brother)#she still barely fucking looks at him#all of her attention is on the (nonexistent) audience#and ryan. ryan hm#ryan usually performs alongside sharpay#its usually an in universe performance. theyre on a stage. theres an audience#and all of his attention is on pleasing that audience#an exception to this is during the gay baseball song#where theres a different kind of audience BUT#ryan barely looks at them#most of his attention is directed solely to chad#talking flirting teasing being cocky and annoying but clearly addressing him directly through most of the song#first time this has happened with ryan. take that as you will#ANYWAY i can see sharpay as completely uninterested in romance but she hasnt realized that about herself#and she THINKS she wants it. because she sees it as glamorous#or maybe shes a lesbian i dont know#she might be a lesbian#the deciding factor is sharpays fabulous adventure#if she has chemistry with the guy in that movie then shes just repressed and clueless#if she doesnt shes aro#or possibly lesbian
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ashes-in-a-jar · 2 months
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My feeling right now about the cast
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pineappical · 3 months
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A rip in the space-time continuum lands NBC Ted right in the middle of AFC Richmond, and he's stuck there until they can figure out how to send him back. Which is fine by him because he LOVES England, and while he misses his Beard, he gets along great with this other Beard. (NBC Ted was never married/no kids.) And Ted thinks it's neat, if strange. Except that NBC Ted clearly has a crush on Trent. And they start spending time together. Ted isn't jealous. He isn't. Nope. [1/2]
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HEY ANON???? OWIE 🥺🥺
god can you imagine Trent's POV through all this.. is he actually into NBC Ted or is it just a fling because it's not like his version of Ted actually likes him, right? he can indulge in this for now, it's not like this version of Ted would stay forever. got to make the most of it while he can and all that. two of the most clueless people in richmond, honestly 😔
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frownyalfred · 1 year
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god-tier superbat has mutual competence kinks and mistakenly unrequited requited love, you cannot convince me otherwise
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ghouljams · 10 months
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your fae au is WONDERFUL i kinda read every single post in one sitting and can't get enough of those fae boys (loved them all but Soap and König are my favs, mean trickster Johnny ❤my love). Do you have some more of Soap and their Darling, pretty please with a cherry on top? Maybe Soaps visits Liebling shop? Does Johnny know König, they probably wouldn't like one another but Soap never was one to get scared...
This is a good post to say: No Fae!141 do not know König! Or like, they know of him because he's a weirdo but they don't know him. Price maybe has met him, but the rest of the boys are not acquainted with the nasty boy. This is a lot of Soap's darling being an adhd queen and not a lot of romance stuff. Very territorial fae vibes tho.
We’re going to get a quick Liebling POV before jumping to Soap and his Darling because God, I love terrorizing Liebling's shop.
You’ve had very little reason to fear the creatures that enter your shop since König started hanging around. You really have no reason to fear anything with him hanging over your shoulder at every hour of the work day. König tends to keep most of the fae in line by sheer presence alone, and human customers tend to act better when they notice how imposing he is. “Scary dog privilege” is what Love called it.
That said, this one is… bad. In a way that squirms in your stomach, visceral and primal and understanding in a way that you can’t even start to think about. He looks human enough, but it’s wrong. The way he moves, limbs long and calculated, elegant and dangerous, inhuman in a way you’d expect from a spider not a man. His voice rubs against your brain like petting the wrong way on velvet, hollow behind the friendly tone, in-genuine. His eyes slide to you like water and stop, staring, Looking.
Ice cold fear grips you tight in your chest. He doesn’t like you. You know it as soon as you meet his eye that you are something he despises. Not in an interpersonal way, no, he hates you the way you would hate a cockroach. Just through the virtue of its very existence in your presence.
König wraps a hand over your eyes, warm darkness obscuring your vision. You’re thankful for it, before you remember this isn’t exactly workplace appropriate behavior. You pull at his wrist and he presses harder against your eyes. His body curls over you, growling a low warning.
-
You are just full to bursting with ideas. You feel all light and golden and your brain wheels are turning at 100 miles an hour and you are getting that sweet sweet dopamine just how you like. God, you love that brand new special interest feel.
You pull out your phone to write a few lines down that pop into your mind and then can’t stop. Johnny’s hand slides right at home on your lower back, as you type. Your shoulders jerk a little, not used to being touched when you’re in the zone. Your fingers hover over the digital keyboard, trying to come up with the next line, no this is a good stopping point for now. You look up at your neglected date and he’s not even looking at you. He’s frowning at some guy across the store. He’s talking to the woman behind the counter, spinning her toward the back room insistently. Not your circus. You turn back to the display you’d stopped in front of. 
You came in here for something, not that you remember what that was, plant stuff probably. You do have a few houseplants still desperately clinging to life. You pick up one of the cute little potted succulents and try to ignore the way the hand on your back is starting to burn. Johnny’s fingers curl against your shirt, breaking the fabric and digging into your skin. You hiss and jerk away from the feeling. Whatever spell he was under seems to break as you rub your back. Your shirt is all in one piece and the pain is gone like it was never there. Still, you’re not a fan of whatever that was.
“Thought we were looking for a notebook,” Johnny says as you hold up the terracotta pot to check for a price.
“I have a million notebooks,” You tell him, settling the pot back in its place. You look up at him, there’s something different in his face, something- huh, you don’t have the right word for it. He’s like a cat with its hackles raised. But that’s not quite right. You don’t have the right linguistic trigger to pull the word from your catalog. Not upset, almost… threatened. Almost. You’ll think of it later. “You good? We can do something else if you want.”
“I’m happy just being with you, we don’t need to do anything special.” He smiles, and it feels… hollow.
“You’re not a very good liar,” You raise a brow and his eyes widen ever so slightly before his smile turns into something much more genuine.
“Let’s do something else.” He relents. You nod, that’s much better. You don’t like being given the runaround, direct is your preference. That’s part of the reason you like Johnny so much, he doesn’t beat around the bush with you.
“We can grab lunch? I’m starving.” You tell him, letting him lead the way out of the shop. Your wrist is grabbed as Johnny holds the door for you, and you turn to see the rather frazzled looking shop girl. She presses something like crumpled paper into your palm with a tight expression.
“This is weird, I’m really sorry, but please take this,” She says and you give her a confused look but nod. She looks almost relieved, and lets you go. You follow Johnny out of the shop and open you hand curiously.
It’s paper, notebook paper, with a phone number on it and some weird name you don’t understand. You don’t really pay attention to the name on it, focus instead drawn to the silvery ring. It’s basic but pretty, not the sort of thing you’d give to a stranger. You slip it into your pocket to inspect later, not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.
“So, lunch! I’m thinking-” You list out a few options, meandering the conversation in whichever direction you please as Soap bites down a growl. The only thing worse than a seer is a nosy seer.
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earlgodwin · 6 months
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LUCREZIA BORGIA + JUAN BORGIA
"One thing that I've always said about Juan is that every action that he does is heartfelt and genuine. When it was the war against the French, he was there and he was going to go to war, even though he knew he was going to die. He saw them getting ripped apart, but he was there and he was going to do it. I believe if Lucrezia hadn't come over, he would have led all his troops into death. I don't think there's anything that he's done which was through general cowardice. In terms of his survival, he died how he lived, and that's laudable, in itself."  — David Oakes.
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kaltacore · 11 months
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obsessed with warden carver's "in war, victory, champion, and whatever else may come" farewell line. he really refrained from mentioning the "in death, sacrifice" part to his sibling he was going to follow into a battle that seemed pretty much doomed to almost everyone
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Sometimes I have actually insightful and interesting things to say about w101 and other times I say useless things like I want to carry around Wizard101 NPCS under my arms like exhausted and surrendered cats while I swing them around and slap their backs and shoulders like I'm proudly showing them off to strangers
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buccellato · 10 months
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I know it's supposed to be a very serious point of contention between Vash and Wolfwood but the way Wolfwood just continues to fill him with lead after already taking him out makes me snort
He's not getting back up! Just one bullet would've sufficed! Now you're just wasting money!!
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papayafiles · 5 months
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i'm watching the scuffed podcast episode that lando was on in 2020 instead of sleeping (i keep skipping forward/trying to get the lando bits only because it's so awkward/uncomfy 😭 this podcast is definitely not my vibe but i'm pushing through for him) and it's so funny how uncomfortable lando and the one girl on the podcast seem the whole time. like if this were in person they'd definitely be exchanging side eyes and laughing nervously. also the fact that lando clearly didn't know what he was getting himself into when he agreed to come on and the entire first section is just him Realizing and looking increasingly uncomfortable 😭 this poor boy
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skullsandcorals · 4 months
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https://www.tumblr.com/skullsandcorals/738285799236321280/im-dyslexic-im-not-stupid
1. Holy shit I am so happy I found another person who gets how smart Percy is, and gets that every instance of Percy looking/getting called stupid is due to his dyslexia or people not telling him anything.
2. Which book/chapter is this from? I need to bookmark it ASAP and start shouting it from the metaphorical tumblr hills.
3. We really don't talk about how good a mom Sally is? Like yeah she's badass and gentle but like. She respects Percy. When the school system failed Percy, she's the one who still not only believed that he was smart but still acted like it and probably taught him too. Queen mom Sally Jackson right there.
1.) YEAHH EXACTLY. Or his ADHD 😭 It drives me NUTS whenever Percy is treated as the dumb + comedic guy. Like I get what they're saying and why they're saying it, but sometimes his character gets reduced to JUST that and it hurts my soul. I get that he's funny as a narrator and as a character and sometimes he can be a little "clueless" but it just feels like some people like to think of that as either all he is or a huge part of who he is. I believe I've also seen Leo get this treatment despite literally being insanely smart at such a young age so. that's...fun. They can be funny and smart too 😞
2.) It's from the 10th Anniversary edition of The Lightning Thief! It's Rick's cover letter for the first readers of the manuscript & a note from the narrator. I don't have a copy of that edition myself, but I've seen some pictures of it on Rick's blog and someone posted one of the pages on Reddit (where I got it from).
Here's the full page from Reddit (source) & the picture from Rick's blog where the page is visible (source):
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3.) YEEEAHHHH I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!! What I would do to get adopted by her rn. The way she talks to him makes me kinda teary-eyed because she's just so...you can just tell how much she loves Percy and that she would do anything to make sure he grew up resilient and kind in a world that's always out to get him. She believes in him so much that it just makes me lose my mind a little. It's just so sweet and I can't help but feel so moved by it.
I'm not sure if you've read Chalice of the Gods, but there's this scene where (spoilers, kinda) Sally talks to Percy after the whole thing with Hebe and honestly this scene makes me want to sob and cry and weep
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“You are a lot of things, Percy. But helpless isn't one of them.”
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obstinatecondolement · 2 months
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It feels like every day I read attempts to debunk the social model of disability that fundamentally misunderstand what the social model of disability is and who the people who developed that model were, including what the nature of their disabilities was, and I want to scream.
But I don't, because yelling at people on the internet is basically pointless. Instead I check to see that I'm not mutuals with whoever reblogged said misunderstanding and vague about it.
#'but [x impairment] would still exist and have [y implications] even if the world were completely accessible!'#okay well yeah but equating impairment and disability is explicitly the opposite of the social model of disability#the union of the *physically impaired* against segregation who developed this model#*were* by and large privileged in ways many other disabled people are not‚ yes#mike oliver who wrote the fucking book on the social model of disability#(social work with disabled people‚ published in 1983)#was a white man with a phd who pioneered an academic field‚ for one#and there *are* criticisms about the limitations to a purely social model of disability to be made#but like... our pal mike oliver was also a wheelchair user who broke his neck in a swimming accident as a teenager#which caused paralysis that affected his upper and lower body#not a clueless 'physically abled' autistic who didn't understand how physical limitations work#he lived the first 17 years of his life as a physically abled person#so I think he was aware of the difference between what his body could do before and after his accident#and like 'disability is socially constructed'#is not saying that differences between people and what they are able to do or do easily do not exist??#my eyesight is so bad that if I could not access corrective lenses I would be functionally blind#and even with glasses my myopia and astigmatism cause a lot of tangible effects on my body#e.g. migraines‚ eyestrain‚ so many floaters that even looking through pristine glasses is like the lenses are scratched to hell#but my eyesight is not considered a disability#because the accommodations that enable me to participate in society fully in this area are so standard as to be invisible#can I magically see without corrective lenses? no#does wearing glasses not being considered a disability mean that I do not get migraines and eyestrain? no#so the arguments the thing I am vaguing are trying to debunk are not what is being argued!#well seems like I screamed about it after all#oh well
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danzsoldier · 6 months
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sometimes I think about how Caine is canonically oblivious to the suffering that the humans trapped in the circus go through. Makes me wonder if he even understand the suffering if someone explained it to him because he’s just an AI, a robot with no soul and no understanding of how complex being human can be
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