#romance is foreign to them. they dont care about playing romantic interests because they only view romance through the lens of theatre | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lavellander · 3 years

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more bc i am unstoppable now

I Am Thinking About My DA Protagonists’ Taste In Romantic Partners both their “usual” type and why they’re drawn to their canon love interest (and the hypothetical ones from other games). i expect no one to give a shit abt this except me lsdfjd but im on a roll and its a good exercise or whatever. i’m sure i’ll use it eventually?????

once again. i know no one gives a fuck but if anyone DOES happen to want to torture themselves and read this pls know all my ocs are bi except zaniyah, who is a lesbian<3

sarenan:

general disclaimer that “in the circle love is just a game” etc etc etc so while she definitely is more inclined to romantic relationships, she only really had friends w benefits at most

she likes smart people! she likes fun people, she likes people who can get on board with her fucked up sense of humor. she’s witty and charming and loves to flirt just to flirt, and in the circle that wasn’t much of an issue lol. leliana is the first person she ever feels like...foot-in-mouth around, bc suddenly she likes and is attracted to someone and...that’s allowed? it’s all very foreign to her but she falls Real Hard, Real Fast

in a hypothetical da2 romance obviously isabela is extremely hot but also sarenan canonically has a foursome w her, leli, and zev so dLFKKDS it makes sense that bela’s the love interest of choice<3 (but also i think it would be like...friends-to-friends with benefits-to-lovers lol)

in a hypothetical dai romance once again josie is very hot and also so sweet and cute and delightful !!!!! idk if its just me but i see similarities bw origins leli and josie so again it just makes sense to me that josie is the LI for an inq romance :’)

(BUT for the most part. it is pretty hard for me to imagine sarenan w anyone but leli, bc they are the only couple i have that like. makes sense. lmfao)

maeve:

actually doesnt often have romantic relationships? she has ~flings~ and rarely catches feelings. she describes her type as “anyone sexy”

(her and isabela do in fact have a brief Thing but strictly no strings attached; this is bc i was very very adamant about romancing isabela when i played da2 and then anders fucking SNIPED me. so i incorporated it into canon i guess. lmao)

her attraction to anders is originally just “sexy tortured man” and then “sexy tortured man that gives free healthcare to poor people!!!!” and then - after it’s clear it won’t be a fwb situation - she realizes she has Actual feelings for him and is like well. its been a good run. guess i’ll die! until he reciprocates dflksdjf then they are kirkwall’s weirdest couple to everyone except themselves :’)

in a hypothetical dao romance her and zev would be classic fuckbuddies who accidentally start having a crush on each other, absolutely refuse to acknowledge it, then someone else in the friend group is like “oh my god PLEASE just kiss we are all going insane watching yall do this” <3

in a hypothetical dai romance im still torn bw sera and bull. maeve would just keep hitting on sera until sera did something about it; bull would be similar to zevran in the fuckbuddies-accidentally-caught-feelings dynamic

alani:

i feel like (depending on the size of the clan etc) alani was prob mostly involved w people she’d known almost all her life. she’s obviously attracted to other ppl who like to learn and stuff, but other than that it’s equal opportunity crushes ykwim. she doesn’t even Know she has a thing about people who are like. puzzles to be solved until solas lol

in a hypothetical dao romance she’d be drawn to alistair bc...who wouldnt be. hes adorable. they’re both warm friendly charming sunshines and i think it’d be natural for them to be drawn to one another. once she realizes he has Baggage she’s like oh. OH. i have to defend you against the world now

in a hypothetical da2 romance i thiiink it would be kinda similar to solas. like oh this bitch has a lot of emotional walls up, he’s got some real shit going on. I Like That. also mage rights, hes a sad sexy doctor, we love a revolutionary, etc. it makes sense imo

zaniyah:

similar to maeve i think she’s more of a fling person than a relationship person, but she has had a couple gfs. she’s not very comfy being super serious but she’s a good gf and is very devoted. generally speaking i think she just likes Hot Ladies but is esp drawn to quirky / weird ppl lol

in a hypothetical dao romance she’d like morrigan bc 1) she’s hot and 2) she’s standoffish lol. she’d take it upon herself to get morrigan to like her as like, a personal triumph, but then along the way realize she has a real crush on her and be like shit? fuck? (the same goes for morg. it would be an oh shit oh fuck moment on both ends)

in a hypothetical da2 romance i think her and merrill would be more like friends to lovers :’) zaniyahs immediately like “youre weird. i like you” also they bond bc dalish etc, and over time she starts liking her more and more. eventually zaniyah just cant take it anymore and kisses merrill, apologizes profusely, etc, and merrill’s like “oh. i thought we were dating?” sldkfjsLDKFJds i care them

(josie is kind of an outlier bc she’s so graceful, collected, knows what to do/say always, etc. i dont believe in love at first sight but if i did thats what zaniyah and josie would be<333)

ranae:

she doesnt like. have a type really. because she’s just been in love w her childhood best friend since forever and doesnt think of what she might like in other ppl bc well. he’s right there? she assumes they’ll be together forever, even if only platonically :(

when she meets morrigan she’s like oh i like women too apparently. cool?? when she meets alistair shes a little put off by the fact that hes a golden retriever, then clings to him bc Trauma, then VERY begrudgingly realizes she has a crush on him but feels like shes betraying tamlen

eventually she comes to terms w the fact that like. theres nothing she can do about tamlen unfortunately, and alistair is here and Loves Her and he’s been the only person to make her truly happy in a very long time. it takes a lot for her to think she deserves that, but she does, and the rest is history :’)

in a hypothetical da2 romance it makes perfect sense to me that she’d latch onto the other Elf Who Is Full Of Rage immediately. they are both very intense and it can put other people off sometimes but they dont really care! die mad about it, shem! etc

in a hypothetical dai romance she’d be drawn (platonically) to blackwall bc grey warden stuff, but subconsciously they both kind of feel like frauds, like they dont deserve happiness, etc; theyre both kinda brusque, at least at first, too. she just kinda sees him as a buddy til she watches him bonding w sera or with some kids or something and then shes like 😳 😳 😳 and then angry that shes like that lmao

#oc prompt #AGAIIINNNNNN going to reiterate i know no one cares im posting this for Me #to Reference #also i have had wine. so #what can you do when the OC brain goblin latches on ykwim #sarenan surana #maeve hawke #alani lavellan #zaniyah lavellan #ranae mahariel

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aintyourlove · 4 years

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Another List of all the K-dramas that I’ve watched:

I thought it would be fun do it again and in somehow helpful for someone maybe get a suggestion from here. Idk. Hope you guys like tho :)

One More Time / I Want to Protect You:

I’ve to put this one in the first place 'cause I forgot about it and it should be at the first list bc this was one of the first k-dramas that I’ve watched and I remember being like searching Korean dramas at Netflix when I didn’t to know where to find them and this was there for me!

It’s a great k-drama, a short one, true, but could be pretty interesting

It’s about this guy who tries to survive doing he’s music, an independent indie band doing local shows and stuffs like that, but he feels too bad about his life and the way that things it’s going on. Tired of that he become to be a trash guy with his girlfriend and friends. If life can be more than that he want to appreciate, but what is the price for that?

I was so mad about the way the main character keep treating his girlfriend at first because she was literally the most patience sweet human being with him. But as the show goes you start to realize that he cares about her and it’s sad seeing him crying about her

I like the end, I think it’s what I like the most in the whole show

7/10, actually it could be an 8/10 because of the end that it was cool

Romance is a Bonus Book:

You can watch it at Netflix :)

The atmosphere of the publishing company scenes gives to the show a special feeling because, for me, they talk with a such sensitivity about the process of publishing a book that it’s really special realize how one simple book can be made

I like the characters but I don't feel the romantically connection of the main couple, they are cute and all the stuff but its different from Tae-o and Song-I from My First First Love if you know what I mean ‘cause like in this drama Tae-o and Song-i were best friends since ever, the chemistry its other, but doesn't mean they are bad, its just a thought of mine

It’s the classic friends-who-dont-know-they-love-each-other story so you probably will enjoy, nothing too special with that honestly

What I like the most in this show it's the final product if you understand what I'm saying, the show as it is!

I think that is a good show to watch it when you just wanna relax, maybe in a raining day with a good snack or even when you are exhausted at home before a long day

7/10 to me, I loved watched one episode every night before going to bed but at some point I was kinda of tired cause it was to calm even for me, but again, it’s a good show

Oh My Ghost:

Park Young-bo one of my favorite actress of all the times

Had so much fun watching this one with my sister, we laugh many many times, I totally recommend this one

The story it’s about this girl that work at a restaurant, and she can see ghosts, and one of the ghost it's this virgin girl that needs to have her first time to go to the heaven ...at least that's what she thinks

The supportive cast it’s SO FUNNY they totally have my attention for the entire time, their scenes and interactions was awesome, every time they appear I waited for my laugh; the actor that does play the Sous-Chef it’s one of the actor that I love to see in scene; his names is Kang Ki- young and he deserves a main character for once!

Cordon: the best man of the show I was hoping that he would it be the “second” guy like some dramas do, you know, but he wasn’t; it didn’t matter tho - (and that’s how I found dramas I always like someone and go search what shows did they participate and when I see one that I liked I try to watch.)

“Chef” - Park Young-bo saying this it’s literally so cute lol

The ghost girl deserves better :(

Chef scenes with Soon-ae (she is the ghost) are the best

He liked the ghost and didn’t want to admit but I’ll do for him!

Police Choi - besides the two main actress he was the best one, he killed this character, the role was made for him, great great actor!

9/10

Hwarang:

Okay so if Hwarang was a boyband I would it be a fan ~just saying~

Taeyung should get more roles as an actor :P

Not sure if this is a historical romance, do not know if they use a real history with THE real events (probably not) but it was interesting seeing something like that, like an old asian romance, we (at least me) are used to see so much of europe historical series that the atmosphere here was a different experience, so cool I have to say

THE HAIR of the actor gosh auhauha that is it, I just have to mention it!

Park Seo Joon was the main character here and (God help me I KNOW IT WAS JUST ME) I did not like his character at all ...okay so for not saying that I hate him (I DON'T) at the end I was vibrating for something that he did that makes me feel “ ok you have me bro” jahjaha but seriously I just feel more connected with Park Hyung Seok characters tho

Park Hyung Seok oh my godness he is such a good actor I love to see him on my screen guys. I was such a fan girl of him in this drama every time he was upset because of the kingdom or Ah Ro I felt that too...

Ah Ro ignoring the king because she was in love with her bro well that made me roll my eyes so many times lol

The drama is about: A young king that no one knows the face but wants to make his kingdom a better place, a lady who tells erotic stories and do some medical treatments for free to the poor people of the village, a foreigner that will make justice to his murdered friend and everyone who needs help. The story of these characters are way more than that ...and the Hwarangs are free, remind that. You make your own choices.

8/10 for me

V’s character was so cute and funny and people should see Jungkook imitating his final scene :)

The Abyss :

Not sure how to describe this one uhauaua I mean that's its some crazy magical things going on here and the soul/appearance thing I do not know how to justify that

My girl Park Bo-Young is here I LOVE her one of my favorite actress EVER

Okay so the thing about this show to me it's that I do not know a thing about it UHAUAHUA I don't get if (and why) people on the show gets the appearance of their soul and o some of they get the appearance of someone else and the “angel aliens” appearance of the begging IDK at all but I did like it

It’s a good one to see if you don't have anything to see; I know it’s sounds kinda sad to say that but I’m not saying in that way, for me this is not a problem cause sometimes I just need something to pass time and I get involved with it so yeah does it work, and I like to watch one episode of something before goes to bed

It’s about this magical marble that can bring back to life people, and have this serial killer, friends who don't know that they love each other thing too and funny scenes, mystery, drama also some actions scenes

It bothers me a lot this thing that someone its ugly and then when he become “beautiful” now they’re valid for be in love. Love it’s so much more than just appearance and if they wanna say that doesn't matter, well there are A LONG LIST of better ways to do I don't know but this sucks the most of the times...

For me the main couple doesn't work that well, I mean they’re cute, and some scenes are really nice, but I don’t know they are just OK you know? Just a thought here

Also if I am being really honest, the best person in this show it’s the detective Park Dong-cheol, Gosh I love this man, he is the one for me in this drama.

6.5/10 the last episode it was kinda of rushed it

“Fallin’ song it’s on my playlist and the final song of every episode it is so cool

My ID is Gangnam Beauty:

The history behind this drama is basically that Kang Mi Rae it's a girl that suffer bullying for her whole life because of how she look. It was so intense that the only way that her seems to solve it its with plastic surgery. So the college starts and she thinks it could be a new beginning. But the thing is that being happy, having a good ordinary life its more than being “beautiful’

The “ugly becomes pretty” thing here its more poetic because they show to us that even when we think that we are fine we may not be because mental health its different from looking good and being accepeted

Talks about bullying, this pressure to be pretty, to follow the patters that society give to us.

I was so mad with the girl that continuous to drag down Kang Mi-rae and then acting like an angel

That scene when they use the old uniforms from school it was so sweet, and they as a couple work it so well

Kang Mi-rae could be more talkative since she is the main character here…

8.5/10

Hey ghost, lest fight!:

Okay, so my sister and I like to see korean dramas about ghosts together??!

Bong-Pal it’s an introspective guy that sees ghost since his was a child. Living seeing ghost and fighting with them turns out to be the way he makes money. It’s in one off these times that he was contract to fight against a ghost in a school its where he meets Kim Hyun-ji, a student ghost that later starts to live and work with him.

The professor character its so god, and it was scary look straight at him in some scenes, the actor who plays him did a such good job.

The guys from Sunbae Soup group hauhaua Kim Ki-young plays one of the guys of the club and I love that they became friends with Bong-Pal

The story its awesome. The pilot twist here are the best thing ever

They have great funny scenes

10/10 for me

Love the couple, love how they ended the story, love all the development that the drama give to us, the monk GOD HE IS SO CUTE, Bong-Pal and the monk what a cute family thought <3

Tomorrow with you:

So this one is pure DRAMA

Its about time travel. Yu Soo-Joon survive an accident in the subway and since that him stars to be able to travel the time. Its because of knowing the future that he save a woman from dying in a car accident. In the other hand Song Ma-rin it’s a star kid that grown up in the shadow of her fame, she is a photographer now that have to deal with the humiliation that the media still gives to her life when one day one strange saves her life. Since the day he saved her, their whole future changed.The thing about travelling the time it's that every time you go to the future and come back to the present your whole future becomes other as soon as you arrive in the new present.

I like this one bc it is emotional and funny at the same time

Shin Min-a its one of my favorite actress, actually I think she is my favorite. I love her acting, I love her in scene. She is the best. If you saw Venus Daegu you know that I’m not lying.

The main couple is PERFECT. The whole story, the drama it was so intense, I couldn't stop watching. I laughed I cried and I want more!

10/10 for me nothing else to say GO WATCH NOW

It was awesome to watch all these dramas, I truly enjoy them and I absolutely recommend to everyone. Honestly I hope you guys like or even discover new dramas to watch. Even thought I put reviews from zero to 10 in no way I’m trying to diss the shows, when I say to you guys go to watch its bc I know that someone could love something that I could only like so go ahead and discover something you could possibly fall in love with.

Also I want to thank all the people who share they favorites shows cause I discover many of these dramas like that.

Another disclaimer here: I know that all the actors are amazing and if in somehow I did offended them I’m sorry, it wasn’t my intention like at all. And Im a kinda of a fan girl and Ik this can be inconvenient sometimes so sorry again! And if i did write something wrong, my apologies, Im trying so hard to improve my writing in english, but its kinda hard since I learn about the language by myself so I dont have anyone besides google to help me out and put everything on the right place.

ALL LOVE <3

you can find my last list here

#tomorrow with you #hey ghost let fight #kdramas #doramas #korean dramas #dramas coreanos #coreanos dramas #series coreanas #korean shows #oh my ghost #aintyourlove #romance is a bonus book #hwarang #v #bts #taehyung #my id is gangnam beauty #one more time #list of korean dramas

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legolasgoldy · 4 years

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𝑪𝑯𝑨𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑻𝑬𝑹 𝑺𝑯𝑬𝑬𝑻.

repost, don’t reblog

BASICS.

full name. Finrod Ingoldo Felagund ( Findaráto Artafinde Ingoldo Arafinwean; Finrod is the Sindarin translation of Findarato that he uses instead once in middle earth)

pronunciation. Fin-rod In-gol-doe Fell-ah-gund

nickname(s). Findo, his Favorite being ‘ Fin ‘ spoken by few very close friends and lovers. other nicknames being things like ‘ wolfy’ said by friends or lovers. Highly depends on person. ( Finda, Findo, Ingo ( which he doesnt really like), Nóm, Nómin, Felagund, Edennil, Atandil )

gender. Cisgendered Male

height. 6′1, also depends on age

age. Verse dependent, teens to 20s sometimes 30s

zodiac. Taurus, April 23rd

spoken languages. English, decently fluent in french and spanish. A little Gaelic when dating his boyfriend Rhys Brennan. ( Obviously in Tolkien aus he speaks Elvish which includes Telerin, Noldorin, Sindarin, etc, Early dwarven tongues like Khuzdul, common/westron, pretty much anything he can learn even the language of the enemy. He however does not know the change in certain languages or new languages that occurs over the ages hes dead. Not until Galadriel, Gimli, and/or one of the hobbits tell him.)

PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTICS.

hair color. Golden blonde

eye color. Emerald green

skin tone. Not pale but fair with a semi neutral and slightly peachy undertone.

body type. Tall and toned. He is muscular but not super buff depending on what you consider to be buff. Body claim pics are in his pages. Hes very soft yet firm, strong, and warm for cuddling.

accent. A mix between american and european english. He was born and raised in Maine until 7 years old then they moved to lower states. His parents have heavy english accents, which he acquired as a small child, and as he grew older it developed into a soft neutral-ish american accent with english attributes. For example, he will say eye-ther instead of ee-ther for Either. Sometimes he’ll also catch himself saying Tom-AH-toes instead of Tom-Aye-toes.

voice. Very kind, gentle, medium deepness of a tone. He doesnt sound excessively deep but not high pitched either, its a very cozy warm mid-way deepness that’ll make you feel safe and soothed. However, it can get a deeper when angry or..during intimate activities.

dominant hand. He is Ambidextrous

posture. somewhere between casual and proper

scars: A few random small scars from childhood, after his mutation kicked in he can no longer get scarring which is fortunate considering the amount of times hes bitten completely through his tongue or lips with his fangs when he first got his mutation. Not to mention times hes been hurt in the future. ( depends on time period, sometimes none at all but others he can have scarring from fighting, any type of misc scar, but not an over abundance of them where you can see.)

tattoos. None, his skin wont hold tattoos after his mutation.

birthmarks. None

most noticeable feature(s). hair, eyes, and fangs. ( Hair, eyes, jewelry.)

CHILDHOOD.

place of birth. Maine, US. ( Tirion in Valinor )

hometown. On the coast of Maine; i havent decided a city/town.

birth weight. 6.9lbs (3.1kg)

birth height. 18.6 lbs (47.2cm)

first words. Mommy or Daddy. ( Amme or Atya)

siblings. Twin brothers Aegnor and Angrod, and little sister Galadriel. ( Twin brothers Ambaráto Aikanáro Arafinwean, Angaráto Arafinwean, and little sister Artanis Nerwen Arafinwean; translated into Sindarin their names are Aegnor and Angrod. Artanis chooses the name Galadriel for herself and does not use her birth names)

parents. Finarfin and Earwen Felagund. ( Arafinwë Ingoldo Finwean and Eärwen Olwean)

parental involvement. Finrod’s parents are both Aquatic Biologists, so he often spent time with them at work as a child. Whether that was near fresh water or salt water, if it was safe for him to go he went. They have always been very close and supportive to each other. ( His parents have always been supportive of him and they have always been very close. They would live in either Tirion or Alqualondë during different seasons so Finrod and his siblings could grow to be apart of both cultures.)

ADULT LIFE.

occupation. Verse and timeline dependent. Generally, Finrod works in a greenhouse & landscaping company. Later on he’ll may get a job as a music teacher. In the rockstar branch of the x-men au he is just that, a Rockstar. ( He is a prince of the Noldor and Teleri. Later he is the King of Nargothrond.)

close friends / family. Yes. Who that is, is very much Thread and verse dependent.

relationship status. In a long term relationship with his boyfriend Rhys Brennan. ( Unofficially married to Makalaurë Kanafinwë Feanorian. Can be verse dependent.)

financial status. His parents had to make a lot of money to support four kids, so it was comfortable enough. However when he moves out he begins making his own money, and he isnt rich by any means but happy with where hes at. ( Timeline dependent, but usually very wealthy.)

driver’s license. Yes, hes a very good driver.

criminal record. None.

MISCELLANEOUS.

character’s theme song. Not really sure, but most likely something along the lines of ‘ I want to know what love is’ by Foreigner ( The song he sang to Sauron)

hobbies to pass time. Singing, playing instruments, Reading, Spending time with his family and friends.

mental illnesses. Not that he knows of ( PTSD, depression.)

physical illnesses. None, as a healing mutant he is unable to get illnesses. ( No illnesses but he does have pain caused by PTSD ranging from light to severe. The pain mostly occurs in his hands and feet, but radiates throughout depending how strong the attack lasts. At times it may only be a very mild ache, and others debilitating paired with mental state. The last being less common and can be accompanied by sleep paralysis and/or night terrors)

left or right-brained. Right-brained

self-confidence level. Depends on time period but normally pretty high? Hes very confident in himself aside from when he started mutating and ran away from home, his confidence was pretty low then. Its usually when hes under personal distress due to someone he cares about being hurt in some way that his confidence dips down. Highly depends on scenario though. ( Pretty high aside from times of extreme distress and depression. e.i. 1. After the first Kin Slaying. 2.Traveling through the helcaraxë he had to force it high because he couldnt lose confidence in a time like that, so it was simultaneously low and high at the same time. 3. After he lost his brothers and many of his family.)

SEX & ROMANCE.

sexual orientation. Demisexual + Bisexual

romantic orientation. Biromantic

preferred emotional role. submissive | dominant | switch

preferred sexual role. submissive | dominant | switch which ever he and his partner prefer hes more than happy with

libido. When single and has no one hes attracted to, virtually non existent. Sure, the need arises every now and then, but the want not so much. When in love its endless if his partner wants it too.

turn on’s. Seeing his partner smile. Especially if its a very wide unadulterated happy smile, even more so if the smile is towards him. Watching his partner walk and/or bend over. He loves being teased, whether its a sultry look, pose, touch, kiss, or words. His partner sitting in his lap. Watching his partner just be beautiful, which can be as simple as them sitting in the sun content or just quietly enjoying themselves in some way. Anything sensual. Getting lost in a happy moment together.

turn off’s. His partner not being in the mood bc he doesnt want to if his partner doesnt, excessively disgusting dirty talk, his partner being upset or hurt, purposeful pain.

love language. Sensuality. Frequent touches, quality time together and doing special things that they consider ‘ their thing’, talking and listening, supporting each others hobbies and dreams, and helping each other with every day domestic activities.

relationship tendencies. Finrod is drawn to unique people even though he doesnt necessarily realize he is at the time. Something will grab his interest and he’ll try to get to know them, it all goes from there. Since he is a creative individual hes just naturally drawn to other creative people whether they use their creativity in the same way or not. The people he has fallen for have all been unique, talented, and inspiring even if they dont know it or downright deny it. They all have a depth to them and they may have a darkness inside them but he loves them, and who they are, darkness and all. He sees so much light and love in his partners. As far as physical type, it doesnt really matter much but hes very taken by pretty hair, eyes, and smiles.

Tagged By: @blind-mutant ty! <3 @

Tagging: @mikhailvalhidris, @driftinglightofthewoods, @truesanguinesoul, @admirable-mairon, @bouncingbeleg, @first-son-of-finwe And anyone i missed or who wants too!! :D

#his x-men au is in basic text and Tolkien in italics #My Finrod Headcanons #Thank you so much for tagging this was really fun!!#Some of these memes get really repetitive but this one is so good!!#I was Tagged.#rp related

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apsbicepstraining · 7 years

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The secret of savor: why we like which is something we like | Tom Vanderbilt

The Long Read: How does a anthem we detest at first discovering become a favourite? And when we try to look different, how come we end up looks a lot like everybody else?

If you had asked me, when I was 10, to forecast my life as an adult, I would probably have sketched out something like this: I would be driving a Trans Am, a Corvette, or some other muscle vehicle. My residence would boast a mammoth collecting of pinball machines. I would sip sophisticated alcohols( like Baileys Irish Cream ), read Robert Ludlum romances, and blast Van Halen while sitting in an easy chair wearing sunglasses. Now that I am at a point to actually be able to realise every one of these feverishly foreseen flavors, they view zero interest( well, perhaps the pinball machines in a weak minute ).

It was not just that my 10 -year-old self could not predict whom I would become but that I was incapable of suspecting that my flavors could experience such wholesale change. How could I know what I would want if I did not know who I would be?

One problem is that we do not apprehend the effect of experiencing situations. We may instinctively realise the authorities concerned will tire of our favourite meat if we gobble too much of it, but we might underestimate how much more we are to be able like something if only we consume it more often. Another issue is psychological salience, or the things we pay attention to. In the moment we buy a consumer good that offers cashback, the offer is claiming our courtesy; it is likely to be have influenced the buy. By the time we get home, the salience fades; the cashback croaks unclaimed. When I was 10, what mattered in a car to me was that it be cool and fast. What did not matter to me were monthly pays, side-impact crash shield, being able to fit a stroller in the back, and wanting to avoid the impression of is available on a midlife crisis.

Even when we look back and be seen to what extent much our flavors have changed, the idea that we will change evenly in the future seem to be mystify us. It is what remains tattoo removal practitioners in business. The psychologist Timothy Wilson and colleagues have identified the illusion that for numerous, the current is a watershed instant at which they have finally become the person or persons they will be for the rest of their lives.

In one venture, they found that people were willing to pay more money to check their favourite strap play-act 10 times from now than they were willing to pay to see their favourite banding from 10 years ago play now. It is reminiscent of the moment, looking through an old-time photo album, when you visualize an earlier picture of yourself and declare, Oh my God, that “hairs-breadth”! Or Those corduroys! Just as photographs of ourselves can appear jarring since we are do not ordinarily read ourselves as others encounter us, our previous appreciations, viewed to areas outside, from the perspective of what looks good now, come as a surprise. Your hairstyle per se was possibly not good or bad, simply a reflection of contemporary penchant. We say, with condescension, I cant believe parties actually dressed like that, without realising we ourselves are currently wearing what will be considered bad flavor in the future.

One of the reasons we cannot predict our future preferences is one of the things that stirs those very preferences change: novelty. In the social sciences of experience and likings , novelty is a rather elusive phenomenon. On the one side, we crave originality, which defines a arena such as manner( a battlefield of ugliness so perfectly unbearable, quipped Oscar Wilde, that we have to alter it every a period of six months ). As Ronald Frasch, the dapper president of Saks Fifth Avenue, once told me, on the status of women designer storey of the flagship store: The first thing “the consumers ” asks when they come into the accumulation is, Whats brand-new? They dont want to know what was; they want to know what is. How strong is this impulse? We will sell 60% of what were going to sell the firstly four weeks the very best are on the floor.

But we too adore intimacy. There are many who believe we like what we are used to. And yet if this were exclusively true , good-for-nothing “wouldve been” change. There would be no new prowes forms , no new musical genres , no new makes. The economist Joseph Schumpeter was contended that capitalisms character was in educating people to want( and buy) new situations. Makes drive economic change, he wrote, and buyers are taught to want brand-new happenings, or circumstances which differ in some respect or other from those which they have been in the habit of using.

A lot of days, people dont know what they crave until you demo it to them, as Steve Jobs gave it. And even then, they still might not miss it. Apples ill-fated Newton PDA device, as charming as it now examines in this era of smartphone as human prosthesis, was arguably more new at the time of its release, foreseeing the requirements and actions that were not yet amply realised. As Wired described it, it was a entirely new category of invention passing an entirely new building housed in a pattern part that represented a completely new and daring design language.

So , novelty or acquaintance? As is often the instance, the answer lies somewhere in between, on the midway spot of some optimal U-shaped curve storying the new and the known. The noted industrial designer Raymond Loewy sensed this optimum in what he worded the MAYA stage, for most advanced, yet acceptable. This was the moment in a product design repetition when, Loewy quarrelled, defiance to the unfamiliar contacts the threshold of a shock-zone and fighting to buying changes in. We like the new as long as it reminds us in some way of the old.

Anticipating how much our flavors will change is hard-boiled because we cannot find past our intrinsic resist to the unfamiliar. Or how much we will change when we do and how each change will open the door to another change. We forget just how fleeting even the most jarring novelty is also possible. When you had your firstly swallow of beer( or whisky ), you probably did not slap your knee and exclaim, Where has this been all my life? It was, Beings like this?

We come to like beer, but it is arguably incorrect to bawl brew an acquired feeling, as the philosopher Daniel Dennett indicates, because it is not that first taste that people are coming to like. If beer gone on savor to me the room the first sip tasted, he writes, I would never have gone on drinking brew. Place of the problem is that booze is a scandalize to the system: it savours like nothing that has come before, or at least good-for-nothing delightful. New music or prowes can have the same effects. In a New Yorker profile, the music farmer Rick Rubin recounted that when he firstly sounded Pretty Hate Machine, the album by Nine Inch Nails, he did not care for it. But it soon became his favourite. Faced with something discordantly novel, we dont ever have the reference points to absorb and digest it, Rubin alleged. Its a bit like memorizing a new expression. The album, like the brew, was not an acquired savour, because he was not hearing the same album.

Looking back, we can find it hard to believe we did not like something we are today do. Current popularity gets projected backwards: we forget that a now ubiquitous hymn such as the Romantics What I Like About You was never a make or that recently in vogue antique babe identifies such as Isabella or Chloe, which seem to speak to some once-flourishing habit, were never popular.

It now seems impossible to imagine, a few decades ago, the gossip provoked by the now widely cherished Sydney Opera House. The Danish inventor, Jrn Utzon, was essentially driven from the country, his mention extended unuttered at the ceremony, the sense of national gossip was palpable towards this harbourside monstrosity. Not exclusively did the building not fit the traditional anatomy of an opera house; it did not fit the conventional word of private buildings. It was as foreign as its architect.

The truth is, most people perhaps did not know what to shape of it, and our default setting, faced with an insecure unknown, is detesting. Frank Gehry, talking about his iconic, widely admired Guggenheim Museum in Bilbao, admitted that it took a couple of years for me to start to like it, actually. The inventor Mark Wigley suggests that maybe we only ever learn something when some structure we think of as foreign causes us and we withstand. But sometimes, many times, in the middle of the fighting, we end up loving this thing that has elicited us.

Fluency begets liking. When shown personas of buildings, designers have rated them as least complex than laypersons did; in other words, they read them more fluently, and the buildings seem less foreign. The role of the inventor, shows Wigley, is not to give the client exactly what he was asking for in other words, to cater to current taste but to change the notion of what one can ask for, or to project future delicacies no one knew they had. No one supposed an opera house could look like the Sydney Opera House until Utzon, taking his idea from a peeled orange, said it could. The nature changed around the building, in response to it, which is why, in the strange messages of one architecture commentator, Utzons breathtaking build appears better today than ever.

A few decades from now, person will inevitably look with dread upon a new house and answer, The Sydney Opera House , now theres a build. Why cant we construct acts like that any more?

This argument for example, Why isnt music as good as it used to be? manifests an historic collection bias, one colourfully described by the designer Frank Chimero. Make me let you in on a little secret, he writes. If you are hearing about something age-old, it is almost certainly good. Why? Because nobody wants to talk about shitty old-time stuff, but lots of parties still talking here shitty brand-new material, because they are still trying to figure out if it is shitty or not. The past wasnt better, we just forgot about all the shitty shit.

The only guarantee we have of savour is the fact that it will change.

In a 2011 sketch on the substantiate Portlandia , the obsessive sardonic catalogue of the hipster mores of the Oregon city, an exaggeratedly posturing persona known as Spyke with chin whisker, lobe-stretching saucer earrings, and a fixed-gear bike is evidence treading past a prohibit. He pictures some people inside, equally adorned with the trappings of a certain kind of cool, and establishes an supporting nod. A few days later, he agent a clean-shaven guy wearing khakis and a dress shirt at the bar. Aw, cmon! he hollers. Guy like that is hanging out here? That barroom is so over ! It exclusively gets worse: he ensure his straight-man nemesis astride a fixed-gear bicycle, partaking in shell artistry, and wearing a kuki-chins beard all of which, he churlishly warns, is over. A year later, we check Spyke, freshly shorn of whisker, wearing business casual, and having a banal gossip, roosted in the very same barroom that produced off the whole cycles/second. The nemesis? He procrastinates outside, scornfully swearing the bar to be over.

The sketch wonderfully encapsulates the notion of savour as a kind of ceaseless action machine. This machine is driven in part by the oscillations of originality and knowledge, of hunger and satiation, that strange internal calculus that effects us to tire of food, music, the colouring orange. But it also represents driven in part by the subtle the two movements of parties trying to be like one another and beings trying to be different from each other. There is a second-guessing various kinds of skirmish here , not unknown to strategists of cold warera game theory( in which players are rarely behaving on perfect information ). Or, indeed, to readers familiar with Dr Seusss Sneetches, the mythical star-adorned mortals who abruptly trench their decorations when they detect their challenger plain-bellied counterparts have idols upon thars.

That taste might move in the kind of never-ending repetition that Portlandia hypothesised is not so far-fetched. A French mathematician named Jonathan Touboul identified a phenomenon of searching alike trying to look different, or what he called the hipster influence. Unlike cooperative systems, in which everyone might concur in a coordinated fashion on what decisions to build, the hipster result follows, he hints, where individuals try to make decisions in opposition to the majority.

Because no one knows exactly what other people are going to do next, and information is also possible noisy or retarded, there can also be the times of brief synchronisation, in which non-conformists are inadvertently aligned with the majority. Spyke, in reality, might have had to see several people doing shell art maybe it even suddenly appeared at a store in the mall before soon jam-pack it in. And because there are varying degrees of hipness, person or persons may choose to wade into current trends later than another, that person is followed by another, and so on, until, like an astronomical adventurer chasing a dead whiz, there is nothing actually there any more. The quest for distinctiveness are also welcome to generate conformity.

The Portlandia sketch actually goes well beyond appreciation and illuminates two central, if seemingly contradictory, strands of human behaviour. The first is that we want to be like other parties. The social being, in the degree that he is social, is virtually imitative, wrote the French sociologist Gabriel Tarde, in his 1890 notebook The Laws of Imitation. Imitating others, what is known as social learn, is an evolutionary adaptive strategy; that is, it helps you exist, even prosper. While it is considered to be in other species, there are no better social learners than humen , none that take that knowledge and continue to build upon it, through consecutive generations.

The sum of this social learning culture is what draws humans so unique, and so uniquely successful. As the anthropologist Joseph Henrich documents, humans have foraged in the Arctic, reaped cultivates in the tropics, and lived pastorally in deserts. This is not because we were “ve been meaning to”, but because we learned to.

In their journal Not by Genes Alone, the anthropologists Robert Boyd and Peter Richerson use the sample of a bitter flower that turns out to have medicinal value. Our sensory structure would understand the fierce as potentially harmful and thus inedible. Instinctively, “theres no reason” we should want to eat it. But someone eats it regardless and experiences some curiously beneficial make. Someone else assures this and imparts it a try. We take our medicine in spite of its bitter experience, they write , not because our sensory psychology has progressed to make it less bitter, but because the idea that it has therapeutical quality has spread through the population.

People imitate, and cultural activities becomes adaptive, they insist, because learning from others is more efficient than trying everything out on your own through costly and time-consuming trial and error. The same is as true for people now speaking Netflix or TripAdvisor evaluates as it was for primitive foragers trying to figure out which nutrients were poison or where to find irrigate. When there are too many alternatives, or the answer does not seem obvious, it seems better to go with the flow; after all, you are able to miss out on something good.

But if social reading is so easy and effective, it creates the question of why anyone does anything different to begin with. Or indeed why someone might vacate innovative activities. It is an issue asked of evolution itself: why is there so much substance for natural selection to sieve through? The master or innovator who was attacked in his daytime seems like some kind of genetic altruist, sacrificing his own immediate fitness for some future payoff at high levels of the group.

Boyd and Richerson hint there is an optimal balance between social and individual learning in any group. Too many social learners, and the ability to innovate is lost: people know how to catch that one fish since they are learned it, but what happens when that fish dies out? Too few social learners, and beings might be so busy trying to learn situations on their own that national societies does not thrive; while people were busily fabricating their own better bow and arrow, person forgot to actually get food.

Perhaps some ingrained sense of the evolutionary utility of this differentiation is one reason why humans are so snapped between wanting to belong to a group and wanting to be distinct mortals. Parties want to feel that their feelings are not unique, hitherto they experience anxiety when told they are exactly like another person. Think of the giddy anxiety you feel when a co-worker is demonstrated by wearing a similar clothe. We try some happy medium, like the Miss America player in Woody Allens Bananas who responds to a reporters interrogate, Differences of mind should be tolerated, but not when theyre extremely different.

If all we did was conform, there would be no delicacy; nor would there be penchant if no one conformed. We try to select the right-sized group or, that the working group is too large, we elect a subgroup. Be not just a Democrat but a centrist Democrat. Do not just like the Beatles; be a fan of Johns.

Illustration by Aart-Jan Venema

When discriminating yourself from the mainstream is becoming too wearying, you can always ape some version of the mainstream. This was the premise behind the normcore anti-fashion tendency, in which formerly forcefully fashionable beings were said to be downshifting, out of sheer tirednes, into humdrum New Balance sneakers and unremarkable denim. Normcore was more conceptual skill activity than business case study, but one whose premise the most different stuff to do is to reject being different altogether, moved the manifesto seemed so probable it was practically wish fulfilled into existence by a media that feasts upon novelty. As new as normcore seemed, Georg Simmel spoke about it a century ago: If obedience to fashion consists in impersonation of an example, conscious inattention of pattern represents same mimicry, but under an inverse sign.

And so back to Spyke. When he felt his drive for peculiarity( which he shared with others who were like him) threatened by someone to areas outside the group, he moved on. But all the things he experienced were threatened the chin beard, the shell arts and that he was willing to walk away from, were no longer practical. We signal our identity simply in certain regions: Spyke is not likely to change his label of toilet paper or toothbrush merely because he hears it is shared by his nemesis. When everyone listened to records on vinyl, the latter are a commodity material that allowed one be interested to hear music; it was not until they were nearly driven to extinction as a technology that they became a mode to signal ones identity and as I write, there are stimulates of a cassette revival.

In a revealing experimentation carried out within Stanford University, Berger and Heath sold Lance Armstrong Foundation Livestrong wristbands( at a time when they were becoming increasingly popular) in a target dormitory. The next week, they sold them in a dorm knows we being somewhat geeky. A week afterwards, the number of target dorm circle wearers dropped by 32%. It was not that people from the specific objectives dorm detested the geeks or so they said it was that they thought they were not like them. And so the yellow segment of rubber, tattered for a good stimulate, became a means of signalling identity, or savour. The only path the target group could avoid being symbolically linked with the geeks was to abandon the feeling and move on to something else. As much a sought for novelty, brand-new experiences can be a conscious rejection of what has come before and a distancing from those now enjoying that penchant. I liked that stripe before they got big-hearted, becomes the common refrain.

What our flavours say about us is primarily that we want to be like other people whom we like and who have those appreciations up to a extent and unlike others who have other savors. This is where the idea of simply socially reading what everyone else is do, get complicated. Sometimes we read what others are doing and then stop doing that act ourselves.

Then there is the question of whether we are conscious of picking up a practice from someone else. When someone knows he is being influenced by another and that other person to know each other very, the hell is exhortation; when someone is unaware he is being influenced, and the influencer is unaware of his influence, that is contagion. In delicacy, we are rarely presumed to be picking up happenings haphazardly. Through prestige bias, for example, we learn from people who are regarded socially substantial. The classic rationale in sociology was always trickle-down: upper-class people hugged some preference, beings lower down followed, then upper-class people scorned the taste and cuddled some brand-new taste.

Tastes can change when people aspire to be different from other parties; they can change when we are trying to be like other people. Groups transmit experiences to other groups, but savor themselves can help create groups. Small, apparently insignificant differences what kind of coffee one boozes become real spots of culture bicker. Witness the varieties of mark now available in things that were once preferably homogeneous merchandises, like coffee and blue jeans; who had even heard of single ancestry or selvage a few decades ago?

There is an virtually incongruous cycles/second: private individuals, such as Spyke in Portland, wants to be different. But in wanting to express that difference, he seeks out other persons who share those changes. He conforms to the group, but the conformings of these working groups, in being alike, increase their gumption of change from other groups, just as the Livestrong bracelet wearers took them off when they accompanied other groups wearing them. The be adopted by delicacies is driven in part by this social jockeying. But this is no longer the whole picture.

In a famed 2006 venture , an organization of people were given the chance to download anthems for free from an internet site after they had listened to and ranked the hymns. When the participants could see what previous downloaders had chosen, they were more likely to follow that behaviour so popular songs became more popular, less popular songs became less so.

When parties established selects on their own, the choices were more predictable; beings were more likely to simply pick the sungs they said were best. Knowing what other listeners did was not enough to completely reorder publics musical penchant. As the scientist Duncan Watts and his co-author Matthew Salganik wrote: The best carols never do very badly, and the most difficult anthems never do extremely well. But when others alternatives are evident, there was greater risk for the less good to do better, and vice versa. The pop chart, like delicacy itself, does not operate in a vacuum.

The route to the top of the charts has in theory get more democratic, less top-down, more unpredictable: it took a viral video to assistants induce Pharrells Happy a pop a year after its liberate. But the hierarchy of popularity at the top, formerly launched, is steeper than ever. In 2013, it was estimated that the top 1% of music acts took residence 77% of all music income.

While record firms still try to engineer notoriety, Chris Molanphy, a music critic and obsessive analyst of the pa maps, disagrees it is the general public fouling one another who now decide if something is a reach. The viral wizard Gangnam Style, he notes, was virtually coerced on to radio. Nobody operated that into being; that was clearly the general public being charmed by this goofy video and telling one another, Youve got to watch this video.

Todays ever-sharper, real-time data about people actual listening action strongly fortifies the feedback loop-the-loop. We always knew that people liked the familiar, Molanphy responds. Now we know exactly when they flip the depot and, wow, if they dont already know a lyric, they truly throw the station. For the industry, there is an almost hopeless is making an effort to alter, as fast as possible, the brand-new into the familiar.

Simply to live in a large city is to dwell among a maelstrom of options: there are seemed like it was gonna be by numerous guilds of importance more choices of things to buy in New York than there are preserved species on countries around the world. R Alexander Bentley is an anthropologist at the University of Durham in the UK. As he applied it to me: By my recent count there were 3,500 different laptops on the market. How does anyone make a utility-maximising alternative among all those? The costs of reading which one is truly better is nearly beyond the individual; there may, in fact, actually be little that scatters them in terms of quality, so any one acquire over another might simply manifest random copying.

For the Spanish philosopher Jos Ortega y Gasset, columnist of the 1930 pamphlet The Revolt of the Masses, journalistic shipments from adventurers seems to thrust one into a vertiginous global gyre. What would he stimulate of the current situation, where a spurt of tweets comes even before the interrupting report proclamations, which then turn into wall-to-wall coverage, followed by a recall piece in the next days newspaper? He would have to factor in social media, one has a peripheral, real-time awareness of any number of people whereabouts, achievements, status updates, via any number of platforms.

Ortega announced this the increase of life. If media( large broadcasters creating audiences) helped define an era of mass society, social media( audiences establishing ever more gatherings) help define our age of mass individualism. The internet is exponential social discover: you have ever more ways to learn what other parties are doing; how many of the more than 13,000 reviews of the Bellagio hotel in Las Vegas do you need to read on TripAdvisor before making a decision? There are ever more ways to learn that what you are doing is not good enough or was already done last week by someone else, that what you like or even who you like is also liked by some random being you have never met. This is social learning by proxy.

People have always wanted to be around other people and to learn from them. Metropolis have long been dynamos of social alternative, foundries of art, music, and manner. Slang has always beginning in metropolitans an upshot of all those different, densely jam-packed people so often exposed to one another. Cities drive taste change because they furnish the greatest showing to other parties, who not amazingly are often the innovative parties metropolitans seem to attract.

With the internet, we have a kind of metropolitan of the sentiment, a medium that people do not just exhaust but inhabit, even if it often seem to be repeat and increase prevailing municipalities( New Yorkers, already physically exposed to so many other parties, use Twitter “the worlds largest” ). As Bentley has argued, Living and working online, people have perhaps never imitation each other so profusely( because it typically costs good-for-nothing ), so accurately, and so indiscriminately.

But how do we know what to copy and from whom? The age-old ways of knowing what we should like everything from radio station programmers to restaurant steers to volume critics to label themselves have been substituted by a mass of individuals, connected but apart, federated but disparate.

Whom to follow? What to prefer? Whom can you trust? In an infinite realm of selection, our options often seem to cluster towards those we can see others representing( but away from those we feel too many are preferring ). When there is too much social affect, people start to think more like one another. They take less information into account to make their decisions, yet are more confident that what they are thinking is the truth because more beings seem to think that way.

Social imitation has gone easier, faster, and most volatile; all those micro-motives of trying to be like others and hitherto different can intensify into explosive erupts of macro-behaviour. The big-hearted ripples have got bigger, and we know that they will come, but it is harder to tell from where, in the vast and random ocean face, they will swell.

This is an edited extract from You May Too Like, published on 30 June by Simon& Schuster( 12.99 ). To ordering a transcript for 10.39, going to see bookshop.theguardian.com or announce 0330 333 6846. Free UK p& p over 15, online guilds only.

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apsbicepstraining · 7 years

Text

The secret of savor: why we like which is something we like | Tom Vanderbilt

The Long Read: How does a anthem we detest at first discovering become a favourite? And when we try to look different, how come we end up looks a lot like everybody else?

A few decades from now, person will inevitably look with dread upon a new house and answer, The Sydney Opera House , now theres a build. Why cant we construct acts like that any more?

The only guarantee we have of savour is the fact that it will change.

Illustration by Aart-Jan Venema

Follow the Long Read on Twitter at @gdnlongread, or sign up to the long read weekly email here.

The post The secret of savor: why we like which is something we like | Tom Vanderbilt appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

from WordPress http://ift.tt/2ts5WsS via IFTTT

#IFTTT #WordPress

0 notes

apsbicepstraining · 7 years

Text

The secret of savor: why we like which is something we like | Tom Vanderbilt

The Long Read: How does a anthem we detest at first discovering become a favourite? And when we try to look different, how come we end up looks a lot like everybody else?

A few decades from now, person will inevitably look with dread upon a new house and answer, The Sydney Opera House , now theres a build. Why cant we construct acts like that any more?

The only guarantee we have of savour is the fact that it will change.

Illustration by Aart-Jan Venema

Follow the Long Read on Twitter at @gdnlongread, or sign up to the long read weekly email here.

The post The secret of savor: why we like which is something we like | Tom Vanderbilt appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

from WordPress http://ift.tt/2ts5WsS via IFTTT

#IFTTT #WordPress

0 notes