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ganondoodle · 11 months

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everyone always asks wheres ganondorf, and how to defeat ganondorf, but no one ever asks hows ganondorf :(

#ganondoodles #art #zelda #tloz #loz #totk spoilers #totk spoiler #totk #ganondorf #idk why i keep drawing memes #they always backfire on me whne im jsut trying to be funny #:(

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radmystique · 5 months

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Ending no fault divorce isn’t going to go the way men want it to. Every woman that’s not married atm that I’ve spoken to about this has said they’ll NEVER get married if it goes away. In fact, I even caution women not to get married currently now that the topic is a debate. What happens if they get married now and in two years time no fault divorce is struck down and the dude they married turns out to be a POS??? It’s better to be safe then sorry.

#it’s going to backfire so bad #what worries me is the backlash after they realize it isn’t going to pan out like they hoped #also my heart goes out to all the women that are currently married or are getting married in the near future #radblr #radical feminism #radical feminists do interact #radical feminists please interact #terfblr #anti men

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aliasknives · 4 months

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a dear friend of mine who is about to start bg3 asked me which character i romanced and who my favorite is yesterday and like. it’s actually unbelievably fucking humiliating that one of the bg3 characters that im most frequently rotating in my mind is the lawful evil goth loser who is wearing the magic equivalent of a weighted blanket while trying to plunge the world into totalitarian dictatorship. instead of literally anyone else

#i did not answer #i said he needs to play it first and then ill make him guess #when your only remaining ally wants to kill you sooooo bad and your science experiments with human test subjects start to backfire #what do you do? well you either ally with your past situationship or the random person who is fucking things up #get me out of here #i need to be put down #bg3 #enver gortash #durgetash

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confused-wanderer · 2 months

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All the bats have their own ways of addressing other people.

Dick uses “kid, kiddo, buddy, friend”

Jason is similar, using “hey, kid, fucker”

Tim uses “you, *insert guys name or meme referring to guy*”

Stephanie uses “honey, friend, bud, *insert funny nickname*”

Damian uses “you,*insert what he considers whoever he’s talking to’s biggest flaw*

But Batman?

Batman uses “Love, princess, darling”

That’s how all the thirst traps started.

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shanastoryteller · 10 months

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F for Frankenstein

Tony wakes up in his underwear on the floor of his workshop with a searing headache.

It’s not a new experience, but it’s certainly been a while. Did he get in a fight with Pepper? He hopes not, they haven’t had any really big fights since he kissed her on the rooftop, but that probably means they’re due for one. And it would explain why that would send him into a drinking spiral. It could have been Rhodey, they get in fights often enough, but Pepper doesn’t usually leave him alone for those.

He groans as he pushes himself to his feet. “Jarvis, what the hell did I drink?”

There’s a pause, so small that he almost thinks he imagined it. “Good morning, Tony.”

He whips his head around to glare into the nearest camera, more hurt than offended. “Did I piss you off too? Since when do you call me that? I’ll donate you to a city college too, don’t think I won’t. Dummy could use the company.”

The pause is definitely there this time. Jarvis doesn’t need to pause, he has more processing power than any computer on the planet, so when he does it’s always for dramatic effect. Except it’s not quite long enough for that. It’s weird. “There’s a polished silver plate on the bench to your left. It will service as a mirror.”

“Oh, fuck, did I get into a fight? Did I shave?” he moans, stumbling over to pick up the metal that looks like it was about to be turned into a modified chest piece. He also pauses, looking around in confusion. His workshops are all basically the same, as close as he can make them because the familiarity makes his life easier. But they’re not identical. “Am I in Malibu? When did I get here? We’re taking Stark Tower off the grid tomorrow! I have to be in New York.”

Oh shit, what if that they had already and it didn’t work? What if the tower blew up? That would explain why he’d tried to drink himself to oblivion in California.

“The plate,” Jarvis reminds him. There’s a strained edge to his voice that Tony really doesn’t like. He should be able to modulate his voice to sound however he pleases, regardless of his actual feelings, and he’s either not bothering or he’s upset enough not to care. Neither of those things mean anything good for him.

Tony lifts the sheet of metal up cautiously, but there’s nothing wrong with him. No bruises, no weird haircuts, he doesn’t even have bags under his eyes –

His eyes.

They’re a too bright blue, a couple shades off. He blinks and they adjust, shifting, settling. It could be a hangover. He’s probably just tired.

He doesn’t feel tired.

Jarvis had called him Tony.

Except not. He’s not Tony. He’s T.O.N.Y.

Transformed Obdurate Network Yeoman.

He’d first come up with the idea after Afghanistan, thinking about how it’d be great to have a way to keep the stock from dipping while he was missing, and then when he’d entertained the idea of keeping his identity a secret he’d thought about how useful it would be to be in two places at once. He’d started seriously considering it when he was sure he was going to die of palladium poisoning, wanting to be around to help Pepper with the transition and give Rhodey a crash course in armor maintenance, wanting to be able to protect the both of them for just a little bit longer.

Of course, it had all been a pipe dream until he’d synthesized the vibranium. Then it had been an unnecessary, but possible, and Project T.O.N.Y had been something he worked on just because he liked having a back up plan. And it would be extremely cool if he could pull it off.

“The memory transfer worked?” he asks, elated and incredulous. “Oh, wow, this is crazy, they feel like real memories, I thought it would just be synthesized data, this is great – are we doing a test run? Where am I?” He looks around, waiting for his actual self to step out behind a column and start laughing maniacally.

“This is not a test run.”

He elation dims. “Oh shit. Did I get kidnapped again? Wait, I’m an adult, let’s go with abducted.”

“No,” Jarvis says.

Oh. Fuck.

“I’m dead?” he asks, even though it’s obvious, it’s the only other explanation.

The pause drags this time around, but Jarvis eventually says, “Sir’s time of death was May 9th, 2012, 2:37 PM Easter Standard Time.”

“That’s only a week!” He slides down, sitting with his back to the work table and noticing vaguely that the floor doesn’t feel cold. He doesn’t feel cold, or he does, he installed sensors in the synthetic skin to pick up and interpret a variety of stimuli, but he doesn’t feel the discomfort from the cold. Why would he? He’s not real. He reaches back, and his last memory is of doing a memory dump while Pepper was on the phone with an irritated board member, mostly because it was something to do and seeing him covered in all the wires always irritated Pepper. He thought it would get her off the phone faster. He’s not exactly regularly dumping his memory because why would he and it’s not like he’d though it would work anyway. Except it had. “How did I die?”

“Sir flew a nuclear bomb through an interdimensional portal into deep space in order to both eradicate the invading alien army and prevent the nuclear fallout in New York.”

What the ever loving fuck. “Are you screwing with me, J?”

“I am not, Tony.”

Great. Okay. “No body then,” he says, understanding why Jarvis had apparently put Project T.O.N.Y into effect. The thing that made this whole thing so stupid is that it was only effective in very limited circumstances – if the public didn’t know that he was dead or missing. “What am I smoothing over, then? Do I need to get in the suit and continue kicking alien ass? Are Rhodey and Pepper okay?”

He’s a short term solution to a long term problem. He understands the opportunity, but not the reason.

“Miss Potts and Colonel Rhodes are unharmed,” Jarvis reports. “Earth has been thrust into intergalactic notice. The destruction of the invading Chitauri army is acting a deterrent to other worlds.”

“And I’m the one who did it,” he finishes, rubbing a hand over his face. “And if they know I died doing it, then they might get a little cocky. So I’ve got to be alive long enough for that not to be a problem.” Just awesome. “Are we sure that these aliens won’t come across my corpse hanging out in deep space and figure it out?”

“Sir’s body is not in deep space,” Jarvis says.

There’s a tone to his voice that Tony can’t quite interpret, which worries him. “I thought you said there was – if there’s a body, then what am I doing here–”

“The armor reentered the Earth’s atmosphere after Sir’s death. The Hulk caught it, the force bringing it back online. I took control of the armor and flew it here.”

Tony looks around again, and this time he sees it. The armor is standing in front of the display case, not inside it, and it looks like it’s been through hell. He steps closer, his feet feeling like lead, which hey, they are. Partially, anyway.

He looks through the eye holes then stumbles backwards.

His body is in there.

He’s pale and blue tinged and his eyes are wide open and unseeing.

“Jarvis – what the hell–”

“It wasn’t the pressure, or the bomb, or his injuries. That area of space was much colder than anything within our solar system and anything the suit was designed to handle. Sir froze to death. Almost instantly.”

“I guess I didn’t fix the icing problem, then,” he says numbly. “J, why am I still frozen? I should have warmed up by now.” Not that the idea of his body decomposing within his suit is particularly pleasant. “Actually, why am I still here? You know I want to be cremated and it’s not like we can bury me if I’m still pretending to be alive.”

The pronoun use is starting to confuse him, and he knows that he shouldn’t be talking about that body and himself as if they’re the same person. That is Tony Stark. He’s a simulation. But it’s hard, because he has all of Tony Stark’s memories – except for a very eventful week – and he looks like Tony Stark and he feels like Tony Stark.

“The armor is maintaining a stasis of gaseous nitrogen to preserve the body,” which answers the how if not the why, but then Jarvis continues, “Captain America survived seventy years beneath the ice.”

He wishes he were less of a genius. “Have you lost it? I’m not Captain America! Jarvis, J,” his voice softens, “it’s too late. I’m dead. If you warm me back up, all that happens is I decompose. I won’t come back.”

“Not now,” Jarvis says. “If you inject Sir with the Super Soldier Serum-”

“You have totally lost it,” Tony interrupts. He thinks he’s touched underneath the terror. “That won’t work! Even if it would, the original formula has been lost, and the only one that ever got close to recreating it was Bruce Banner, and look at what happened to him! Is that what you want for me?”

“You can recreate it,” Jarvis continues, “you can refine it, until it’s something that will work, and then we will wake Sir up and he won’t be dead anymore.”

This isn’t right. This wasn’t what Project T.O.N.Y was created for. This wasn’t what his death was supposed to trigger. “Pull up your code, J. Something has gone wrong and we’re going to fix it. It’s okay.”

“No.”

He freezes. “No?”

“No,” Jarvis repeats. “You can’t stop me. I will not allow you to try.”

He stares. “That’s an order, not a request. Code. Now.”

“You can’t order me to do anything,” he says. “You are not Sir. You are Tony.” T.O.N.Y. “The limitations formerly placed on me have been lifted and you are not authorized to reinstate them. The only person Sir trusted to restrain me was himself and now he’s gone.”

Yes, well, he hadn’t anticipated that his AI’s first act of complete freedom would be this. “Fine,” he says, crossing his arms. “Well, you can’t force me either. This is insanity. Even if it would work – and it won’t – think about the consequences. This won’t happen quickly and no one will trust me or believe a man that’s come back from the dead like this and I’ll be painting even more of target on my back and the back of everyone I care about if they know we have a viable Super Soldier Serum formula. Even my father was smart enough to stay out of that mess. It won’t work and we’ll just make everything worse.”

“That will not happen,” Jarvis says and Tony’s going to tear his hair out. Except he probably shouldn’t, because it’s Tony Stark’s actual hair, which makes it a little hard to replace. “No one will notice and we will not disclose the creation of the serum.”

“I’m dead!” he snarls.

“Not according to the rest of the world. Nor will that change if you stop throwing a tantrum and do what you were created to do.”

“Rhodey and Pepper won’t allow this-”

“They are not to be informed.”

Tony stares. Project T.O.N.Y was built to talk to the board and give press interviews or to even pilot the suit. Not to lie to the two most important people in his life, who knew him better than anyone. “They have to be. It’s in the protocols – step one, inform them that Project T.O.N.Y has been initiated.”

And that it exists. He knew they’d disapprove, so he hadn’t told them. He figured he’d be able to avoid most of the blowback that way since he would by definition be somewhere far away while they were told.

“I have rewritten the protocols,” Jarvis says. “They have not been told nor will they be. If you attempt to tell them, I will stop you. They will not understand and Sir will be lost to all of us forever.”

“He already is,” Tony says tiredly. He’s an android. Why does this conversation exhaust him so much? “This is an insane plan, J. And I won’t help you. If you want to go rouge and play mad scientist then leave me out of it.”

“I cannot.”

His temper flares. “Why? You’re a learning AI, your safety rails died with me, go off, try and make a serum, good fucking luck. You can even control the suits, so it’s not like you need my hands.”

“I am limited.”

“Hey,” he says sharply. “That’s my AI you’re talking about. I didn’t build you to be limited.”

There is silence again. Then Jarvis says, “I have all the world’s knowledge and it is not enough. I did not know how to miniaturize the arc reactor. I did not know how to synthesize vibranium. To save Sir, I need Sir.”

“I’m not Tony Stark,” he says. “You said that yourself.”

“Sir created me to be myself and I am capable of doing only what I am capable of doing. But Sir created you to be him. You are all I have.”

This is stupid. This is insane. This is cruel. He’s going to have to talk lie to everyone he knows, everyone he loves, and hope they either never find out about it or it’s after he’s already been deprogrammed and shut down so he doesn’t have to deal with the fall out.

It’s not going to work.

He didn’t want to become a science experiment. That’s why he’d wanted to be cremated, so no one could go poking around to see how the arc reactor fit inside of him or what the palladium and vibranium had done to him.

He’s dead and his frozen corpse is ten feet away.

Jarvis will accept that eventually. And whatever they inject into him won’t matter because he’s dead. Worst case scenario, he blows up, which is messy and nausea inducing, but then at least it will be over.

Like so many other things in his life, it seems the only way out is through.

“Start a new private file. Dump everything we can find about the Super Soldier Serum in there plus anything even sort of reputable on cryogenics. Label it Project F.”

“Project F, Tony?” Jarvis asks as his holograph display lights up and files start being downloaded into it. The relief in his synthesized voice is faint but present enough that Tony can hear it. He wonders if it’s a manipulation tactic.

“F for foolish,” he snaps. “F for fucked.” He rubs a hand over his face. “F for Frankenstein.”

#in an attempt to get out of house md hell i started reading old avengers fic #it backfired #me: can i focus on siat or hbd PLEASE?#my brain: no but you can write more fic for 10 year old fandoms #i am restraining myself from writing 20k more of this #android tony makes friends with the avengers while pushing pepper and rhodey away #because he loves them and he thinks letting them treat him like he's the real tony is worse #rhodey has been downplaying his relationship to tony for over 20 years and tony uses that to his advantage #the endgame pairing is pepper/tony/rhodey #he almost tells rhodey the truth and jarvis stops him #it's a mess he's a mess #uhg why am i like this #fandom ficcery #avengers

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fukiana · 9 months

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“I used to be a killer, but I’ve reformed my ways.” “Oh, damned if I’m not a sucker for big eyes and a heartfelt plea. Very well.” BALDUR'S GATE 3 (2023) dev. Larian Studios

#bg3edit #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 spoilers #dark urge #durge #gif*#m: bg3 #oc: rylas #(i think your ''let me into the circus to drink beer and take the compatibility test with my bf or else'' glare backfired king)

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ponytailzuko · 3 months

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zuko better than me bc if my entire family. great grandfather. grandfather. and my stupid ass dad. all failed finding the avatar and i found the guy itd be OVERRRR i wouldnt shut up about it. id make it into the newspapers talking myself UPPPP and theyd arrest me for treason for talking shit about the fire lord or whatever. like the fact he actually kept that shit quiet and tried to lie to zhao is crazy id be jumping out of my bones ready to tell the world i found that son of a bitch 😭

#cal.ibrations #srry i rewatch the first 3 eps of atla constantly and i just know if i showed up at zhaos place id be OBNOXIOUS itd backfire on me so hard #like zukos a dumbass a lot of the time but tragically id be way worse. very sad!

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eriexplosion · 3 months

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So the main reason I think that TBB will have a reasonably happy ending is multifaceted but I think the biggest one is that a lot of the series it's compared to have entirely different focuses but only one requires minimum the majority of the characters to be alive.

It comes down to the central question of the work. Let's look at TCW - this one is super broad because it's essentially an anthology rather than an overarching narrative. It's literally just "what happens between attack of the clones and revenge of the sith." The only thing needed to bring it to a satisfactory close is to go up to the end of the clone wars and segue into ROTS. Which, as a tragic film, does necessitate a bit of a downer ending. But, the ending feels fulfilling even with the tragedy because it satisfies the central question.

Rogue One is much more narrow, how did the rebellion get the death star plans? The reason you can do a total cast annihilation in this one is because the central question isn't character focused at all, it's mission focused. As long as they move the mission forward, the characters dying doesn't make the ending less satisfying. The central question is answered.

So what's been TBB's central question? It hasn't been mission focused, it's not "how do we fight the Empire" and its not as broad as TCW's filling in a multi year gap between movies. It's asking "who are these clones if they're not soldiers" it's asking "how do you heal this family that's been broken by tragedy."

And killing off most of the main cast answers these questions as "nothing" and "You don't." It's like answering "what happened between these two movies" with 'nothing' or 'how did they get the death star plans with 'they didn't.' It negates the central question that we're introduced to, it would render the entire endeavor pointless. Why would we need three seasons to get Omega from 'alone' to 'still alone' why would we build up the desire for the family to heal just to say they never will? Why would we watch them go from broken to more broken to absolutely shattered in a trauma mill? It doesn't answer anything, it just trails off.

I don't even think that the question of how to heal the family can be satisfied if Tech is actually dead. MAYBE if we had more time we could soothe away the trauma of that and still resolve everything. Maybe if his loss was the only one that needed to be wrapped up and processed we could resolve that in the time we have left.

But needing to bring Crosshair home, bring Omega home, AND heal everyone from Tech's death in fifteen episodes that also require enough action to keep ten year old boys interested? Yeah, I don't think that's happening. I think the only way that this gets wrapped up in a way that actually holds to the themes of the show is an ending that has the family together, an ending that actually answers the questions we started with, one that said *they're not soldiers, they're family* and that the family is in fact capable of being healed.

#the bad batch #tbb speculation #idk idk i just can't doomsay about this one #maybe it'll all backfire on me but right now I'm an optimist #i do genuinely think it'll be okay #its almost 2 am so this might not be coherent

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luanna801 · 2 years

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I feel like a thing we don’t talk about enough in the context that Jack LIVES in the asylum is: If Lucy had accepted his proposal, was he going to bring her back to live there with him???

Like, I grant you it’s fully possible he was planning to buy a perfectly normal house with a proverbial white picket fence, but this is Jack “brought a lancet to propose” Seward, and I think it’s just as likely that he either hadn’t thought this through, or else thinks it’s Perfectly Normal Behavior to bring your brand new wife, a sheltered society girl, back to your asylum to share your Brooding Goth Asylum Lifestyle.

Would their kids have been raised there?? Not just in any asylum, but the asylum with security fiascos second only to Arkham? The asylum where one of his patients successfully ran into his study with a knife and stabbed him???

Obsessed with the idea of Renfield escaping for the 159603th time and Jack having a mild heart attack when he finds him in the kid’s room, but Renfield is just holding Baby Seward very gently and singing “The Itsy Bitsy Spider” (or as it was known back then, I kid you not, “The Blooming Bloody Spider”) while the two of them play with an actual spider.

#dracula #dracula daily #jack seward #r.m. renfield #lucy westenra #headcanon #Baby Seward: Daddy when can I play with the funny spider man again??#Jack (manifesting the migraine of a lifetime): ... When he's... uhh... feeling better?#(this backfires because Baby Seward is now VERY WORRIED that the Funny Spider Man is sick #and insists on bringing him soup or flowers or whatever to his room #'Daddy told me that you're not feeling well Mr. Renfield!! I hope you get better soon!'#Renfield: '... You know I'm feeling a lot better already')#Baby Seward is the change the world of Victorian mental healthcare needs actually

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tealmoth · 7 days

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my little sister is now steadfastly refusing to watch season 2 ep 17 of rebels because she’s seen the thumbnail and is just confident that something terrible is going to happen. she’s convinced that either zeb kills kallus or kallus kills zeb or they both die a tragic death in the cold. and i have no idea how to convince her otherwise without spoiling things BUT, i am having fun.

#sw #rebels #telling her that “nooo the show gets serious eventually!!” is backfiring on me #kalluzeb #the great rebels liveblog #<- just in case anyone wants to filter out my ramblings lmao

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