#at the end of the day when i'm hittin

[heroes-fading]

tumblr did eat this but as a wise poet once said “honey i rose up from the dead i do it all the time”

so i feel like i have been slowly entertaining in the back of my head for a year or two now the idea of writing again. it started with like, writing bad poetry in journals. i’ve been consuming media, but in a lot more of a disconnected way. engagement was like, reading reddit and twitter threads for a day and putting it back down. then episode 8 happened, and i was like FUCK i’m unglued.

to put in perspective what kind of shit i was up to in high school: i wrote half a million words of like...once upon a time fanfiction. and in that i found lots of lovely connections to people but amidst a sea of other factors: being a literal teenager who still thought i could be the smartest person in the room (spoiler: never), having no real social net outside of the internet (and i will say my internet friends -- many of whom i still love and talk to today -- got me through some of the WORST times of my life), and having a very fragile ego. probably related to points a and b. everything felt like the biggest thing in the world because my world did not feel very big.

now i look back at it like...holy shit you wrote a goddamn novel. who cares if it was like, literature or not? 

to be honest one of the things that got through to me was this cj the x video, especially their point which i’ll recap here:

“We are under the impression that art is something special people do, and to do it well makes you a genius, and to do it poorly is embarrassing. This sectioning off of the art world for artists from regular life and regular people is completely artificial and it is bad for the soul of your society.”

and they talk a bti about the Terrifying Ordeal of Being Known and perfectionism and just the amount of fuccccckin mental blocks we put around what’s good art and bad art and we spend so much time agonizing over what’s good and what’s cringe and you know what? embrace cringe! who cares! none of us will live forever!!! sharing art is the way we sustain ourselves in the long run.

i always have an internal voice saying something’s not good enough. i’m Always like “damn, these metrics ain’t metricing like they were earlier...” and then i’m like fuck...am i doing this for the Idea of Fandom Success or because of my fun silly lil hobby? my fun silly lil hobby? aight guess i ought to just embrace the Terrifying Ordeal of Being Known and accept that silly lil numbers ain’t what’s fufilling, it’s the practice of writing and sharing and going at the end of the day “at least one person liked this, and being known isn’t the Most Horrific Thing Ever”.

another thing i Never did when i was a teenager is tell anyone i wrote fic in real life. now my husband and friend and sister-in-law know (the latter involved either alcohol or being confined to a plane, which is a lot like alcohol) and you know how much they think i’m embarassing? they don’t. oh and actually a co-worker. they just go “lol, this is My thing” and it’s a novel they tried to write in college or fanart they post on a secret instagram or a monsters inc page they ran in high school (all real examples) because everyone has some kind of thing they care about, some artistic expression, and we’ve conditioned people to think trying is embarassing. trying is vulnerable and the point, i think! no matter how cringe! 

and vulnerability is this awfully stingy thing because sometimes when you think about it for too long it’s not unlike putting your hand on a hot coal. like, fuck, laying awake at night knowing that people know You Tried and what if they still didn’t like it? humiliating. awful. please schedule me with the goddamn firing squad. you didn’t get the metrics you wanted. or worse, you did and now people don’t think you deserve it. they’re gonna find out you’re just a big fanfiction writing fraud.

but maybe that’s the point! i don’t know! vulnerability is hard and painful and growth and sincerety is almost WORSE. but there’s also something lovely and cathartic about it and at the end of the day knowing that other people feel that, too. can never get too lost in either sauces of thinking you’re the worst thing ever or the best and the only one who gets it. just gotta accept the vulnerability of it all~

i’m back in my daydreaming era, i think fic gave that back to me. i shut her off for a little while, but she’s still there! and it’s not the worst thing, having overwhelming creative ideas on the treadmill or in a hotel lobby or furiously writing in a google doc in the middle of the night even if it does feel Silly. sometimes it does make the world a little more magical, framing in a narrative. 

(my therapist at some point has made comments about my narrative framing skills in the context of my life and getting out of a shitty family situation with a lot of embedded generational cyclical fun stuff to a point i have a lot of the things now i used to dream about despite it, my pathological need to write my way out also applying to my life and maybe it’s not the worst way of moving a locus of control inwards. i used to dream about feeling safe and being respected interpersonally and professionally because it’s something no woman in my family ever really got and i get that now. anyway, as i said, radical vulnerability!)

narratives are powerful and meaningful and art is too, i don’t care if it’s fanfiction at the end of the day! we’ve all felt something or gptten something or felt community and that’s meaningful enough. 

this is a very long-winded and frankly chaotic way of saying sure, i’m a writer enough!

#fic talk #and talk and talk............. #i have a job i love that fufills what i want to Do and Be but also i will always love writing so much #and to get to do that in space where i get feedback and community #at the end of the day when i'm hittin #g that lil refresh button for a dopamine hit because social media has broken our brains #i do take a deep breath and be like #oh cool #i did that #and the more we police that feeling or worse misplace it the harder it gets to the Point #of just doing shit for the sake of it and having a good time! #don't get sucked into all the other shit #i think a big turning point in my life honestly #was being in the car after having the worst fucking day of my life or second worse #after a really terrible situation with my mom #and i was in a goddamn target with a radically different hair color in my hands #and after that i was like #i'm not doing this to myself! #i'm not going to doom myself! #i'm going to listen to some goddamn kelly clarkson #because of you LEGENDS ONLY #and live for myself here and build my own existence #i literally found old journal entries to myself saying something to the idea of this #and then i interned at my current job and met my husband and slept on the floor of people i still love and am friends with today #and this isn't fic but #NARRATIVE #and what i was and wasn't going to do #and i read that a year or two ago and just bawled my eyes out #because she did that :') #and that's the power of building something for yourself and owning your own lil narrative even if sometimes it's just lil fanfic

[jd07201990]

Honestly dude? I kinda brought this on myself. Definitely coulda gone a little softer on my bro... I mean boyfriend, but like, come the fuck on! He came home every fuckin' day from practice, kicking off his rank shoes, and stomped all over the house leaving nasty sweaty footprints on the hardwood bro! Then he fuckin' thinks it’s cute to sneak up and hug me with his soaked tank top, as if his funk wouldn't ruin my clothes! What the fuck!

Ok, ok, looking back after everything that happened, maybe I shouldn't have called him a Nasty Sweatrag, and told him to soak himself in bleach next time... Especially not in front of the creepy Goth kid, who happens to be his little brother!

One moment, I was just shouting at him, really laying it on him, sick of the sweat and the time he spent with his bros. I guess I was a bit jealous, but damn dude! I'm his bro! I mean, his girlfriend... or at least I was, until I made him cry and his brother glared from the corner of the room, seething.

In that split second before my stomach heaved, I knew I'd fucked up bad. Like, really bad bro! The world fuckin spun, I hacked and spluttered, then everything went black. I woke up later that day in a bedroom that was distinctly mine, but totally different. When I sat up and noticed my B-Cups were flat, solid, and square, my nipples small and pointing downward with the new bulk, I knew I was fucking JACKED brah! I, I mean I was fucked... this is a bad thing damn it! I'm not some lumbering meathead! fuck!

Anyway, I tossed my sheets, and noticed the rest of me. I was definitely taller, with big, clammy feet like my best bro... I mean boyfriend's, dangling off the end of my bed. My legs were thick, solid and capable of carrying the added bulk I'd suddenly packed on. The entire room reeked of humid funk. There were dirty clothes all over the floor by the hamper, battered, worn old sneakers and cleats by door in a heap, and my Vanity had become a fuckin' beast of a gaming rig dude! Fuck yeah! Wait... no, I don't game damn it! I'm not a fuckin' dude!

the rest of the room had changed similarly. Everything that could have pointed to a female living here, was now distinctly male. And that of a Big, Dumb, Sweatrag of a dude, as I'd called my bro earlier. However... it didn't bother me. I could barely smell it over the pungent fog that came from my muscled-up body. I was swole! And kinda gross dude, not gonna lie... But like, I can't fuckin help it! It’s like there's a fuckin' furnace inside me, burning up everything it’s got to keep me pumped and riled, on edge so bad I can't stop myself from fidgeting. my hands just, do their thing dude! One minute I'm lookin' in the mirror, the next I'm groping my fuckin Rod... I, woah... ok, it might be getting worse! I meant my fuckin' cock! I, I mean dick! Fucking damn it!

You know what, whatever. like I said, one minute I'm standing there, the next I've got my dick in my hand, or groping my fuckin nuts like those behemoths at the gym! Or it'll slide up my shirt, lifting it up while I don't even realize it. There’re all kinds of fuckin' weird dude things happening, and I can't stop any of it! My bod fuckin does as it wants if I'm not actively fighting it! The worst, and I mean it, the absolute fuckin worst, is when I've just scratched my junk good, and suddenly, like fuckin instinct, I'm sniffin' my fuckin fingers like a damn animal! What the fuck dude! All the fuckin' bros say its natural, that its some caveman shit... I might believe them, because it happens with my pits too! Just, standing there hittin' up one of the pretty chicks... I... I mean uh... my old friends... and then wham! sweaty pit fingers all up in my grill!

My Bro's little brother, the creepy Goth kid caught up with me when I'd all but sprinted the few blocks to his and my bro.. I mean my fuckin' boyfriend's house. I was just coming to terms with the fact that I'd hauled ass down the street, half naked, when He opened the door, and busted out laughing. Even when I had him dangling off the floor by his hoodie, threatening to squash his scrawny little pipsqueak ass, he cackled, before his eyes flared, and in an instant, his hand was out, my nipple in his fingers, as a cold pain flashed over my chest, and I looked down to see my nip was pierced, a silver barbell forcing it to stick out, perked up and stiff.

My jaw fell, and I dropped his ass, trying to form words as this wild, aggression filled me. The fuckin' goth punk crossed his arms and smirked, just as the piercings, or rather, the hex he'd put on them, erupted to life. I felt as if my brain was being squeezed from the inside, as if this fuckin' loser had his hands on it, wringing it out like a wet towel. I clutched my head, stumbling until I hit the couch, and sat, my legs splaying wide to give my fuckin' junk some room, like any dude does, when I felt the pressure lesson, and a strange, warmth began to flow from the back of my head, down my spine, and settled into my fuckin balls dude! It was like having all your smarts and who you are, drained down and stored where it belongs bro! Brains in your fuckin balls!

Fuck... no wait! He said if I couldn't fight it, if I didn't learn what it was like being an athletic dude, I'd lose everything I was, and end up just another sweaty meathead, lumbering around the gym, lifting big, gettin fucking swole, and plowing my way through chicks until graduation! I had to fight it; I couldn't give up. And my bro wasn't fuckin' helping!

He was always a fuckin' Golden Retriever, happy and dopey and dumb, I shoulda realized he was a good dude and I was lucky, before I'd been Bro'd up and brain squeezed out! Now, my fuckin' bro loves taking me to the gym, putting this body through its paces, even throwing fuckin shade when he got a whiff of my fuckin' pits! He laughs, but dude? I'm fuckin ripe, always am since his little brother turned up the juice and made sure I fit right in with the bros. My bro... boyfriend... finds it hilarious when he catches me flexing in the mirror while pumpin' out reps, or when I have to peel off my tank cus it got too damn soaked! Just look at my fuckin boxer briefs bro! See that sweat? Thats a fuckin' Man's sweat! I'm a fuckin beast bro!

All I had to do was last 1 week. Live like a fuckin dude for 7 days, learn my lesson, and I'd have my old life back. That shouldn't have been hard... well, I shouldn't have been hard, when my best friend Laura forgot what was in my fuckin pants one night while I stayed over, and fuck if I didn't end up railin' her for a good hour, before I realized too late that I'd be stuck as a sweaty dude if I shot my 5-day pent up load! She gave me no option. Teasing me about being a big dumb meathead, all brawn, no brains, thinking with my fuckin' dick, and the last straw, the moment that ensured I'd be a dude forever, was when she bit and nibbled her way down my neck, her nails leaving red scratches along my fuckin back, until she bit my nipple, playing with the barbell with her tongue, and I fuckin lost it. Just fuckin plowed in, balls deep, and shot my load. That was it, everything that had made me a girl, had unloaded with high velocity into my best friend's belly. I nearly blacked out, my big feet scrabbling in the sheets trying to get deeper as my balls drained desperately. When it was over, I fell to the side in bed, gasping as she panted and giggled, tracing her nails through the sweat dribbling down my pecs. It’s been a month since I'd lost both my temper, and my female body... but fuckin look at me brah?! The bros and I are fuckin swole! My bro says I'm far better off this way, and Laura does her part, keeping the damn Male Aggression and insatiable need in my balls, satisfied. There's a reason dudes are the way they are. Sometimes, they just can't help it.

[multi-fandom-imagine]

Jujutsu Kaisen Characters + Sad song's.

Pairing: Yuji, Sukuna, Megumi, Gojo, Nanami, Geto, Toji, Choso, Hiromi,Kusakabe

A/n: Spoilers

I was in your arms

Thinking I belonged there

I figured it made sense

Building me a fence

Building me a home

Thinking I'd be strong there

But I was a fool

Playing by the rules

•

But tell me, does she kiss

Like I used to kiss you?

Does it feel the same

When she calls your name?

Somewhere deep inside

You must know I miss you

But what can I say?

Rules must be obeyed

↳Kusakabe

《

《

I'd take another chance, take a fall

Take a shot for you

And I need you like a heart needs a beat

But it's nothing new, yeah yeah

I loved you with a fire red, now it's turning blue

And you say sorry like the angel

Heaven let me think it was you

But I'm afraid

It's too late to apologize, it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late, whoa

↳Geto.

《

《

I miss you

Miss you so bad

I don't forget you

Oh, it's so sad

I hope you can hear me

I remember it clearly

The day you slipped away

Was the day I found it won't be the same, oh-oh

I didn't get around to kiss you

Goodbye on the hand

I wish that I could see you again

I know that I can't

↳Nanami

《

《

Until I hit the city limits, 'til I hit the state line

'Til I reach a coast, or a ghost town a thousand miles out

Keep this needle hittin' 90

'Til your memory can't find me anyhow

Keep the pedal down

'Til I see some taillights that don't make me think of you

'Til I'm pulled over on the shoulder by some flashin' blue lights

'Til this heart forgets to break

I don't care if it takes me all night

I'm gonna drive you outta my mind

↳Hiromi

《

《

I miss those blue eyes

How you kissed me at night

I miss the way we sleep

Like there's no sunrise

Like the taste of your smile

I miss the way we breathe

But I never told you

What I should have said

No, I never told you

I just held it in

And now I miss everything about you

I can't believe that I still want you

After all the things we've been through

I miss everything about you

Without you, whoa

I see your blue eyes

Every time I close mine

You make it hard to see

Where I belong to when I'm not around you

It's like I'm not with me

↳Gojo

《

《

I need a do-over, how did we end up this way?

I'm so confused, lover, did I mistake love and pain?

Ain't got no shine left, I couldn't hide it

I almost lost all my light, and

I didn't choose sober, but my eyes can't look away

I see our true colors, lately, we've been lookin' gray

I can't turn back now, 'cause you'd take me back down

That road that always seems to come right back around

Remember when

We had dreams to fly away?

But that was then

And now our story's just a page

Like a wave, you're always crashin' into me, crashin' into me

And these days are harder than they used to be, and they used to be

No shootin' stars can fix what we aren't, and

What good's a lighthouse when the light is burnin' out?

↳Megumi

《

《

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show

And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control

But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain

To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain

From my eyes

Tonight I want to cry

Would it help if I turned a sad song on

"All By Myself" would sure hit me hard now that you're gone

Or maybe unfold some old yellow lost love letters

It's gonna hurt bad before it gets better

But I'll never get over you by hidin' this way

↳Toji

《

《

But I don't care what they say

I'm in love with you

They try to pull me away, but they don't know the truth

My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing

You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love

I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love

Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love

You cut me open

Oh yeah

Trying hard not to hear, but they talk so loud

Their piercing sounds fill my ears, try to fill me with doubt

Yet I know that their goal is to keep me from falling, hey, oh

But nothing's greater than the rush that comes with your embrace

And in this world of loneliness, I see your face

Yet everyone around me thinks that I'm going crazy

Maybe, maybe

↳Sukuna.

《

《

They took you away on a table

I pace back and forth as you lay still

They pull you in to feel your heartbeat

Can you hear me screaming? Please don't leave me

Hold on, I still want you

Come back, I still need you

Let me take your hand, I'll make it right

I swear to love you all my life

Hold on, I still need you

I don't wanna let go

I know I'm not that strong

I just wanna hear you

Saying, "Baby, let's go home"

Let's go home

Yeah, I just wanna take you home

↳Choso

《

《

This is the place where I sit

This is the part where I love you too much

This is as hard as it gets

'Cause I'm getting tired of pretending I'm tough

I'm here if you want me

I'm yours, you can hold me

I'm empty and achin'

And tumblin' and breakin'

'Cause you don't see me

And you don't need me

And you don't love me

The way I wish you would

The way I know you could

I dream a world where you understand

That I dream a million sleepless nights

Well I dream a fire when you're touching my hand

But it twists into smoke when I turn on the lights

I'm speechless and faded,It's too complicated

Is this how the book ends,Nothing but good friends?

↳Yuji

#yuji x reader #yuji x you #yuji x y/n #choso x reader #choso x you #choso x y/n #sukuna #sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #sukuna x y/n #toji fushiguro #toji x reader #toji x you #toji x y/n #megumi fushiguro #megumi x reader #megumi x you #Megumi #hc #hcs #gojo satoru #gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo x y/n #Hiromi #hiromi x reader #Nanami #nanami x reader #kusakabe x reader #geto x reader

[psychedelic-ink]

Loving the Dave York apologies all day every day obvi ✌️…now consider this your invitation for a teeny tiny jack rant? One headcanon you can’t live without?

Oh god you just opened pandora's box because my rant about the movie doesn't end with Jack it's for the entirety of Kingsman 2

buuut I'll just keep my rant limited to Jack. Spoiler alert, I'm a jack apologist as well, fight me

First of all, I'm still confused as to when Jack decided to let every drug user die. But from what I understand he just decided to switch during the snow scene since there was no indication in the movie that he was plotting with Poppy all this time

That man did not deserve to DIE, LET ALONE GET MINCED

I get so so mad that they just decide to shred him. Especially when Eggsy just brushes it off by telling him to "put jel on it now"

SO YOU'RE TELLING ME EGGSY, WHO WAS GONNA KILL THE ASSHOLE THAT WAS HITTIN HIS MOTHER WITHOUT A SECOND THOUGHT, DID NOT RELATE TO JACK'S STORY AT ALL??????? HELLOOO?????? NOT EVEN A LITTLE???????

As if Eggst didn't kill Charlie moments ago for vengeance

It's dumb that eggsy has 0 conscience there. They could've just sent him to statesmen prison or something. And I like the kingsman franchise, I had fun during the first movie (tho very salty about how they treated roxy which is my second reason why Kingsman 2 just rubs me the wrong way) but the writing for the second one is just not it. I hate shock-value death.

But loved the fight scene. Like can I point out just how skilled Jack is. He went head to head with two kingsman agents TWO

I know Jack was "the asshole" of the statesmen but no one questioned his death. Just how big of an asshole was he????? We don't even get much clarity about why he doesn't want Ginger to be a field agent, we're just left to assume he's either misogynistic or just jealous Ginger might do well or---which is my personal take on it; he was just worried for her. In my head I have conducted an entire angsty story about those two and why their relationship is strained

But long story short just like with Dave, Jack did not deserve to die like that. It's not like he was straight-up evil. Man was grieving, throw him a bone for christ's sake lock him up or something

JUSTICE FOR JACK

#mail.💌 #anonymous

[aggravateddurian]

Swooped by a Bird, Part 3

This is part of a series explaining how So Mi returns to NC.

Part 2 here

"Hey, V. It's good to see you again," said Song So Mi, or at least, the spectral projection of the netrunner, visible through some kind of backdoor in Vega's neural net.

"So Mi... long time no see... considering the last time we spoke, you sent me a snowglobe from the Moon, then blocked me. We pretending that you didn't cut the comms lines?"

So Mi nodded, her eyes turning away, "Necessary precaution. Myers has half of the netrunners in Langley looking for me. Even the protocol I'm using to talk to you now isn't entirely secure."

"I couldn't risk them tracking me..." she then turned back to Vega, "tracking you."

"Uh-huh. Fair, I guess," Vega nodded, "there's also the whole lying to me thing. How'm I to be sure you aren't out to screw me?"

"Yeah... there's that as well..."

"I've... made a lot of mistakes, V. I fucked over a lot of people... lost a lot of friends in the process. Likely wouldn't have ended up the way it was if I was a little less... gonk," she slouched over, "I thought about you... 'specially you. Been thinking about you... how I used you... I shouldn't have, V."

"Look, So Mi, I..."

"Hang on a sec," she stopped her, "not a day went by where I felt guilty about stealing it for myself, not at least investigating a way to use it for both of us. I found out... a year later that I was wrong about the cure. We could've used it... both of us... but I was too selfish."

"It doesn't matter now," Vega told her, "We found our own cures. Yours... a lot easier than mine. Had to die again to find mine. New body courtesy of Arasaka... klepped, o' course, got a reputation to keep up."

She faintly smiled, "I looked for your sig in the NET, V. Your biochip gave off a unique signal that I could identify in a heartbeat... I started to lose hope after it disappeared, 'bout the end of May '77. Then, I pinged it one day, and suddenly there you were... in Pacifica of all places."

V began to grin. It was a very Johnny grin, the kind that grew on one's face then their ego had been suitably stroked, "So I have a unique signature? Good to know, raises my ego immensely."

So Mi tilted her head, "You're a unique woman."

"Try my hardest."

"Anyway... I'm... relieved, that you're still alive, V... I don't have a lot of friends left."

"What's your plan, So Mi? Why contact me now?"

She blinked, deliberately, "I'm coming back to Earth, V. To NC, precisely. The moon's great, but I'm sick of hiding. Looking to not waste this new life I have."

"Okay... but why NC? Myers has goons all over the place. City's lousy with FIA agents and operatives."

"And Myers wouldn't dare risk the resource commitment needed to eliminate me... especially with you beside me. Arasaka would not look at that mildly - especially with Yorinobu Arasaka at the helm. He's just itching for an excuse to send a suicide drone through the White House window."

"Ironic - Arasaka's one of the greatest threats to our world, but they're our saviour from Rosalind Myers."

"Exactly," So Mi replied, "At least in NC, it's real air, real earth... there's an opportunity for a life, not just survival."

"So Mi! No spaceplane crashes, no shady deals with warlords? No double cross? Are you losing your edge?"

"As much as I'd love to have a calling card, it's probably better not to attract Myers' attention."

"Damn!" exclaimed Vega, "I thought you were dragging me into a cloak and dagger black ops thing. You may have gotten me to drag out that Black Ops bodysuit... you're missing out."

So Mi's smile turned subtly devious, "Damn... maybe I will need to crash a spaceship, just to see you in it."

The reply shocked her. She reached for her neck, "Um... a-are you flirting with me, right now?"

So Mi maintained eye contact with Vega for a few moments, her grin firmly painted on her face, "I'll call you when I'm back in NC. Later, V - be seeing you soon..."

"Was... was she hittin' on me? Or just being flirty? Like Panam was? Fuck..."

That was when Johnny decided to make his grand return. He stood, side-eyeing Vega, stroking his beard, "If it looks like a bird, and chirps like a bird... she was definitely thinking about doing one of two things to you..."

"Johnny..." Vega grumbled, "nice of you to show up."

"Bitch fuckin' put me on pause!" Johnny replied, "It hurt, too. Girl needs to be a bit gentler with the hardware she plays in... anyway, she either wants something from you, or she wants you. She could be tugging your heart strings to get what she wants from you, then leave you used and abused on the roadside, like an empty Slaught-O-Matic."

Vega shook her head, huffing, "And I don't need to guess which one you think she's after."

"Honestly, she could be after both, Vega. She's a fuckin' spook. She's trained in fuckin' emotional manipulation, gaslighting and professional lying. Couldn't trust her as far as I could throw 'er... but also, two years have passed. Things done changed for others, V, maybe she changed as well... maybe you fixed her."

"So... you think there's maybe a chance she's not just having me on? She wants to start a new life in NC, truly? And I'm part of that vision?"

"Fuck, V," exclaimed Johnny, "I'm just an engram living rent-free in your mind, leaving chip crumbs on your couch and airing my used shirts on your TV - the fuck do I know?"

Johnny sighed, running a hand through his hair, "Or... maybe... might be that you have a certain aura that attracts a certain type, Vega."

Vega rolled her eyes, "Enlighten me, oh master of human relationships."

"Judy Alvarez, River Ward, Song So Mi. What do they have in common, V? What keeps happening between you and them that draws them to what's inside your sweatpants?"

"Dunno, Johnny. Maybe I'm just a nice girl, and they're attracted to my sensitive soul... and definitely nothing to do with my body."

"Wrong," Johnny retorted, his expression obvious to what he thought of Vega's suggestion, "You enter their life, help them out of fucked up experiences. You're always there for them... they fall for you, straight into your crotch... or, maybe...?"

Vega let out a deep sigh, "This should be good..."

Johnny grinned, "You've finally developed my famous charismatic impact, and the guys and girlies just can't rizz-ist you. Just remember, V: with great power, comes great rizz-ponsibility."

Vega stared blankly at him... more correctly, through him. She closed her eyes and huffed at Johnny's early 21st century slang, and a pun that was likely already old when the towers fell, "Fucking Christ, Johnny. Can't believe I preferred our argument to this conversation..."

#cyberpunk #cyberpunk 2077 #cyberpunk 2077 photomode #cp2077 #cp2077 photomode #virtual photography #my vp #fem v #cp2077 au: chorus #oc: vega 'v' howse #johnny silverhand #song so mi #songbird #songbird x v

[notmuchtoconceal]

- welcome to a bruxaria – a show that may or may not still be the bruxcast. on my program today, i have the effervescent lil tall sip of fizz, cpt. luxor drottin ready to seranade us with some fine poppy foam bubbles i know you'll be eager to trickle right down your shirt fronts!

- what up, brother brux. you got a special girl in your life yet, bro?

- she's out there, mate! might be listenin in right now for all we know!

- bro, what i know is you're gonna make the luckiest lady alive the lady who makes you the luckiest man alive. you're so special, brother brux. you deserve a special girl to be with, all the rest of your days ~ !

- cpt. drottin, i have to ask – you a great dane or just a standard swede?

- deffo not enough finns to make a whole fish, bro.

- an avalanche every iceman cometh, i am indeed the jelliest of donuts!

(STICK IT IN A PUSS O/o STICK IN A PUSS o/O YOU LOVE TO CUP THE VULVAE /O CUP THE VULVAE /o CUP THE VULVAE O/O )

- bro, you should soundproof cpt. hlaford when you're recording, otherwise stick em someplace soundproof, bro. holy hell – what are you even spending 9/10ths of our total broadcast budget on if you can't account for basic quality of life improvements?

- mate, we hadn't always been a big show. you're a young up-and-comer. you weren't with us in the early seasons. i started out as a pirate channel in a janitorial closet and did every show to the hammer beat of wally deadliftin in nothing but a big sweaty ass-stained lycra singlet and cheese scented wool socks, the singlet himself (itself -- weren't once human!) almost obscenely padded out by a fat heavy knit cotton tee which'd accrued mothscales on pine like sycamore sap; sweatmarks foamroasted in tree rings so much i thought he were wearin some sorta throwback arctic camo -- sometimes just strippin outta his drenched as shit singlet, tossin his goofy coconut tropical scented pineapple printed dick briefs at me head. full on fuckin sloshin me like urinal piss foam in a mug i served outta the tap at me own bar, and wally fukin drank it down, asked for another and another -- by the end, i was dehydrated, lyin on my side jitterin and he just bleched and said he was goin out fer a beer /// live on air, his stinky fuckin briefs hittin me head, and it's so sweet and anointed and heedy like a fuckin pina cooldada it takes awhile to taste the burn -- joshua openly fornicatin christos, i bet this man's cock is delicious! i just wanna stare the seat of his pants everyday the rest of my life and cringe thinkin about how good it'll taste, but i'll never ask, cause i'm such a shy and delicate flower -- i had to hear it during recording, during editing, on the air. it's part of my creative process now. there just is no motive to create without hearin wally scream through a wall. punch through the wall. chase me around the room. hollerin after me to gimme back his soul. destroyin all my equipment, but not before it can all be backed up to the satellite, way out in space, where wally's domain can not yet penetrate into the upper atmospheres ~0~ ! tell you the truth, i can't coax him into helpin me do it unpaid, so i just sort loike – y'know. built my sets around him. sometimes cut off pathways in advance, to keep him boxed in, change the patterns of nature to make him predictable, just sorta like – you know. follow him and record so inspiration can strike the second he lets his guard down and thinks he's free to be himself, but i'm just over here bein a nosy lil anthropologist lady who wants to record the sound of him gettin it on so i can once again feel a butterly tinglin in my nowhere places when the currents of life are alive and fruitful like a smoothie churning egg beater my brain from which i will fry the heartiest crepes?

- bro, to be completely honest – i have so many questions, i don't even know where to start, so um – i won't unless you give me a few moments to collect myself, which i doubt you will?

- mate no, by all means. this is a show where two people talk. a talk show. i have to show you talking. in all the hours we've been together, i'm sure i definitely have footage of you talking. go ahead. prove it to me now and to the viewers at home that you have participated in my talk show by talking to me – now. live on air. edited only for initial broadcast.

- um –

- cpt. drottin, you know, i think –

[vintage tye-dye throwback bumper

cpt. laika greenscreened onto a celluloid scarred void of rippling droplets !

collides with cpt. jacek in the edit ! ~ !

as typical,

laika's overblown toothy cheeked eyeball fucking is soggy sugarmush churned maple greens from steel-cuts =0

/ and jacek's face looks much like his dick --

much too large and swaggering to be this fuckin leaky. ]

( 0 _ ./. o. >,: <;\|-/~ ) o ( l .,.KlTYT>| |)

the bell rung.

the mirage accumulated by light particles into corpulence.

your brother didn't have a beard. he looked nothing at all like cpt. drottin.

- um, sir?

once again, your most favored hour fell upon you.

- your sarcasm is much appreciated, sir. you're the only one who has the balls to roast me both openly and to my face. 

in full confidence, you would much rather have him raw.

- our most astute viewers know the true meanings of your words, as do i, though i scar my tongue most to know saltlick... just gonna pretend you wanna rut my tight and virtuously chaste hole and leave me drenched in my own tenderings and squirtings, sir. // your proclivities have been much established by those-in-the-know, but um… this'll look better for the men, you know? you're way more relatable when they're thinkin bout you like, um – like  grabbin me,& suckin me without, um, tearin me in half and slurpin out each a my halves like shucks through the pelvic openings?

he has such a pretty throat. a shame you couldn't fit both your cocks in his mouth at once without tearing him apart down the prime meridian.

- sir, i know you're jockin me right now, big bro. you had two cocks, um – holy fuck, you'd have this cloven hoof bulge all gnarled like the limbs of a tree out which the earth had been hollowed, all fat roots and pike-thorn branches and, um –  i'd wanna bury myself in your crotch even more?

you and everyone fuckin else, kid.

- my apologies, sir. after my recent sesh with cpt. schreibermachen, where secrets were re-divulged without the application of rope, i couldn't help but fall into the dreamy reveries he induces upon the mere mention of your, um – that shrill horrible beeping sound that would otherwise lance at my ears, but which by his gentle assurance now floods my nerves with the anticipation of the sweetness before a toothache?

he needed to surprise you. he wasn't doing anything new today.

- i could rip off my face and expose the maw of coiled intestines beneath, hissing out with the hellfire of your own failed accountings, lord of all which forgotten ~ slain always by the light of remembrance?

throw a tarp on him. worst he'd do is burn the place down.

–

cpt. schreibermachen glanced at cpt. drottin through the light.

he seemed for a moment, only anonymous. some face more flesh than memory, shed as the cicada shell of a mask.

- never have i met a man before as you, brother – as uncut and void of substance as myself. 

cpt. drottin – let himself linger in the glance that he threw back.

he would stroll as he would linger, some eternal dusk whenever he took things slow. though his eyes were the hardball palming the mits of the leather. no fangs to see in the dusklight he crept.

corrosion softest in the creases. parts of him wore away, from wear and from moisture, and it seemed inevitable – that he should decay though still a young calf he was. to slaughter before spoil. no caustic splotches. no sheens of oilslick to stain. the wear of age which deep intuition had bent into seams varicose down the planes of his face – hairline fractures in the light which you would only see for only you looked, and met not a man's eyes before meeting the topography of his skin, as you interrogated your seawall against oblivion every morning.

you had seen comelier young men putresce on the vine. he was simply microdosed with his own fermentations, dispersed in beads along the sweet, you never tasted his punch, or into what frenzy it drew you.

- i will hear you, brother – for you are a virtuous man.

schreibermachen wore a brief of cotton, drottin a brief of aluminum – the translucence of the strands wrung spun and glow wormed in the rays of the evening sun refracted off the contouring of their meddle.

their cocks they pushed together, to careen shaft to shaft, in boy's adventure fables where they knew the heroics of their capacities for life and for daring, ascending and descending the ropes from which they hung and swung, sang and wrang, though sometimes it were vine or stone, and they could press only closer to cling in embrace, singing praises of valor, sputtering salival and bellowing, articulations upon articulations as you strove to meet his eyes ~

though your head craned back as his, slick inside the prison of his briefs, as you foamed through the cling of yours, your slick coating his, beading through the meshing to mingle with his as he stewed in your seepage and his stung your nicks, your cockheads so tight inside the dual collar of your phimotic ring, magenta and clamped upon by the joint limitations of your own crucified anatomies, as you were girdled in flesh as you were gartered in fly, as much two bodies trapped inside a mind as two minds trapped within a body, inches upon inches together /

your eightheads together, (4 + $ - CAP = ←) meeting his eyes with the mutual piteousness of your need, hovering at a threshold of ecstatic communion, condemned to never plummet off, but shoot deep roots into the rocks at the edge, to drop fruit to be carried far in the rivers below ~ your trunks entwined and your branches parting farther, the spongeal nodes of your need still aching and pressed together, no longer able even to rub, but merely to give and to merely pulse in the same heartbeat of your idiot-eyed surrender to himself and to you ~

breeches around your ankles in the public squares, your uniform jackets drenched with drool, foaming down your legs and into your breeches, briefs so soaked-through there is nothing left to-be unseen ~

and you are breathing in the spice of cpt. drottin's beard, longing to bite at it, but you can only hold him, wishing your faces were clamped even closer together, stuffed by the figure-eight of a dual-chambered inflatable gag, mouths clamped into the optical illusion of a vice-grip jaw to jaw so you could meet his eyes, only his eyes, and never be away from those pools into which you longed to drown, but would plunge into only to scale up – for the light you saw was but a reflection of your own.

… you are the true foundation, brother joseph;

drottin sang to ache ~

the exhaustion he could no longer prolong.

/o

[ camera left rolling for six hours.

through the silky, slatten light

falling through embers of alleys;

cpt. hlaford bums a smoke off a derelict saint, to bless him with a bottle of spiced rum, and a pirate jig they will do.

a pirate jig they did do for you.]

o|

( )

.\

- cpt. drottin. my, my – aren't you looking lovely this fine day!

- thank you, cpt. haruspex. all the world is lovely that i look upon ~

- do you ever feel, like, er – there's somethin that needs to be done that you aren't doin, mate? sometimes i feel like i, um – sorta use people to distract myself from my real problems?

- bro, you shouldn't be talking to me if you have things you need to do.

- mate, no – it's not like that, it's more, like –

- you can't make excuses for yourself, cpt. haruspex. you're a brave and enduring soul who every day stands in the muck of primordial chaos and pushes the world heaved upon your shoulders back up into the warm and ever enduring horizon line of the sun. you know this to be the truest and most real you. you know the smog which composes the pollutant of your atmospheres arises only from maladaptive industry, and this is simply the cumulative effect of many tiny corrosions which have gone unchecked, for an arrest has come over your basest components.

... you are a live today, cpt. haruspex. the day is what you make of it, and you ought make a reality the many fine things you know yourself capable. will you take my hand? take your hand and make a pledge to me?

- mate, your hands i'd – 

- don't be scared, brother brux. i'm just a man. 

- …

- haha, hey lil slime trail.

- it's just, um – you're so warm and so soft – i don't want to lose myself in your eyes, cause i'm not as strong a swimmer as i should be, or maybe i am, bein the one to be born and all, it's just – i jump headfirst into choppy waters or else plunge into the arctic cold? cause i like to? 

… guess it sorta feels like when i see the storm waves or the blackest depths, i gotta take the leap. if i don't, it's like – why didn't ya jump in? why didn't ya endanger your life? what's a self-preservation instinct done but hold ya back to the wall? think you're ever gonna flower in the ice?

/// sure are gettin oily, mate – way your hormones are chuggin away.

... what ya see's what ya get, and all ya see is the filth gushin out ya. you breakin up, or you breakin out? i seein static or caulked splotches? why i see a time-lapse of a rose on every face, so bright and clear i can anoint myself with my own imaginins?

... guess it sorta feels like the slicker i get, the more i can stay outta holds, but um – i don't always know if there're people grabbin at me while i'm under water? the pressure wraps around me. some hand, some arm. throats always grippin mine. don't always know what i need to do. if i'm strugglin to keep my head up, or strugglin to sink!

- cpt. haruspex, look upon this vast country. all but the sink is yours.

... cpt. haruspex, look upon this scarred and arid continent. all but the sink is yours. you have no basin in which to let stagnate still waters, and no gorge cut by the slow erosion of a coercive night's languid stream.

... you are face down now in a puddle of your own brewing, gasping for air when you could simply flip and meet the sky ~

falling to the sky 

… some fisheye of waters diffused, icy only at the rims of space.

... sun warmed as the sands in which you lie, standing only to see truth.

... cpt. haruspex, you have dominion over every beast that you tame. you have dominion over every land you claim. you receive nothing of what you have asked, though you have accepted everything you have to gain. you assist and you are given, and you insist only so you do not receive. there are things which you are owed, and to make yourself known will bestow upon you the earnings of your actions! do not drown yourself in your own meager moisture – not when you have it within you to call upon those pressures of the sea, to cloak out the air ~ in the black tumult of the storm winds, you may blot out the sun – for an hour, for a day – to drench the droughted land in the downpour for which it is overdue!

- am i like heat, lux? risin like air, or bread in the oven? will i be fanned down or else carved and buttered? am i a tasty lil croissant – you wanna have me for breakfast, deem me the fittest meal, unworthy as i am?

- with my coffee, um – put some butter in there, too – make it shimmer as gold in the suns you obscure, for what dim light you have is surely radiant, though it skims only blackenings of my won-blotted eyes?

- and my waters? soakin the land as a fair maid well-aware i have tracked her far across the fields?

... will they sink deep, between the hard baked scales of the sun-drenched soil – the debris of what is dead and dry, to raise porous and fungal in the caps of some vast toadstool, as handsy as it is without hands? 

- i will always remember you, cpt. haruspex. you are the bell which makes me remember. you are the ring which wakes me to dismember.

- i am the phone you never pick up. i am a connection you did not make. i am a spring shower dried up too soon, for the light of the sun oppresses me with its bounty :-- which is not the meager bounty of oijyamb. doomed though i am, doom always ain't gotta be such a gloomy thing!

- in the shade, the boulevard of every garden :-- hatted though i am, no cat am I, though still i feed on all assortments of what i net! we are all the octopus :-- for we reach and we grasp, and the bites of our kisses leave their mark or their notch, more pattern than bloodclot or breakage!~

- lux, i err – really appreciate all you have to say, but i really need to go to the bathroom mate. can you please let go of my hands? your grip is so strong, so tight and so loving, i think it makes me quiver in ways that neither me or my bladder could ever get used to!

- go, brother brux! begin your showers early!

- land's gonna get real fertile, i can tell ya that mate!

-

– another brick, brother lux. it is a pleasure to be limed with you.

o|

///

...

[armchair slid against the tile, crashed back against the plateglass ;;

ceramic shattering, rootwork of marble slab pulled up by the plinth.]

,,,

\\\

.\

[cpt. psychorragia hunched over throbbing, polishing his pulsating meat, bellowing like an ape peeling, fondling, mashing bunches upon bunches of ripe bananas unfurling in pinecone fountain light waters gushing burgeoning spooge geysers of milk and honey in cascades of neuronal flares all throughout the denser coagulants of himself; all over his muscleboy mantits shoulders so broad and slopey.]

./ o ./

cpt. psychorrhax dabbed the cloth under cpt. schreibermachen's eyes.

blooms darkened the blue to bluer gray, as light as spring rain, shining black as mud beckoning a baptism in clay.

though he picked up far from little, it could hardly be enough.

the tears, infrequent though they were, bled him for the waters came too fast and too heavy, and left joey once more clinging to his brother –

some branch he ducked under to catch reprieve from the downpour, as he looked back to see fields bleak with storm swallowed by the choppy surf of some granite tide, finding himself now alone on a rock stranded out at sea, sodden beneath the wind-torn branches of this lone and rootless tree he kept upright, for he did not know, were he to lean his weight upon its boughs, would it sink or stay afloat.

- you're too good to me, laik.

- that is a contradiction in terms, cpt. schreibermachen.

where joey refused to push himself -- seduced always by the warmth of his brother's arms -- he would find himself pulled beneath the riptide, buried forever in the mudflats which churned beneath the shallow seas.  

- what depthless rubber lungs i have! what a well-scrubbed and castiron heart! let no man tell you there is no fortification to be found in running away! for what submersible would i be if i caved to the pressures ... !

joey's hands clenched laika's shoulders.

the blood grew torpid in his veins.

laika spoke, and made himself heard. 

- a lesson our brother, cpt. haruspex has no want to learn, for he lives his lectures daily, repeating them with such frequency.

his hands rested in mutual conspiracy with himself to lean further in, for he could feel only useless letting them hang limp at his sides, and so it made itself so that to anchor was always an act of will. 

– i shouldn't need you to do these things for me, laik.

though now joey felt only that he could push off, for there could be no indignity greater than being seen for what he could not hide.

once more, laika made himself more. 

-- i am the man you love. i would do these things and many more, and i would do them gladly, would you but permit me.

from the distance of a forearm's length, cpt. schreibermachen could meet his brother's eyes ~ the peak of a silver mountain through the mist.

– i shouldn't need you… to take care of me, laik.

laika leaned in.

joey's heat bled through the layers of their shared insulation. 

– everyone needs someone to take care of em, joe.

once more, a gooiness clung to the skin of his arms. pearlescent as honeysuckle baked in the heat of their embrace. steam distillations rose from pomegranate flesh and there were nothing but cocktails to be had.

– not the major. never the major. he is truly more – unconquerable than i.

laika allowed himself to linger – he had no cause to contradict in full. not here. where he was needed most. where he most needed to be.

– you don't know what he needs. sometimes i know better, big bro. 

joey stayed with him. it seemed natural. no protocol, and no guilt.

he would give anything, for with laika he had all to give.

for laika never asked for things he could not give.

#with this ring #can't live with em #can't ever die without em #fuck you #don't ask me why #i am the reason

[fresh-buttered-bread]

15 questions untagged

Were you named after anyone?: Simon from popular work The Bible. I liked the story of him being a fisherman, he had worked all day and not caught anything, then Christ asked him to put down his net one more time and though he complained, he did it, and then caught a whole net load of fish. It reminds me that no matter how bleak things seem or how much hard work and how long it can take to reach abundance, keep trying, keep believing. My birth name was not after anyone and was one of the most popular names in my generation

When was the last time you cried?: damn like every day over something heartwarming or something. but I had a biiig cry when my trans tape didn't work and hurt

Do you have kids?: no, I may adopt someday if I get married which I might like to, or raise their children if they have any. But I would prefer a partner who did not want to get pregnant, I just have strong feelings about adoption. However raising kids is probably not right for me so I'd like to work as a volunteer 'big brother' or babysit for members of a church a lot or something like that

Do you use sarcasm a lot?: Sure, not constantly but maybe a little more than average or that I'm comfortable with

What’s the first thing you notice about people?: If their fit is good

What’s your eye color?: hazel. mid-forest green with a strong gold ring around the center

Scary movies or happy endings?: Most scary movies have pretty happy endings, all things considered. I do like scary movies and used to be a HUGE fan of them, but I like heartwarming stuff too. But I do think I prefer a movie that leaves me feeling disturbed, concerned, sad, etc

Any special talents?: Digital and traditional painting and illustration, physical non-digital sculpting, sewing, fashion design, video game making, essay writing/research, I used to do poetry and lyric writing, I practice singing but I would not classify that as a talent I am "good at", used to play piano a bit and viola more before that - my sight reading is pretty damn good, video editing, cooking is decent but more so my sandwich prep is excellent

Where were you born?: in the same town I live in now. the hospital was closed after my birth and was semi famous for being haunted and has since been torn down and turned into apartments

What are your hobbies?: of stuff not listed in my talents: model kits and puzzle building, gaming I suppose, watching supergreatfriend, Jerma, and the Watcher Boys; praying, meditating, and studying religions; walking and scootering outside, collecting hot wheels/toys

Have any pets?: nope. waiting to hear back from a rescue if they'll let be get their beautiful cat. if not I will get a bird in a few months or so

What sports do you play/have you played?: gymnastics and figure skating as a kid, and I loved swimming, then I wanted to get into soccer but couldn't. Played DDR. I roller bladed and biked, biked quite a bit and am planning to get into it again. I got into body building a bit as a teen and am back into that now. I occasionally try tricks with my scooter but I am not into breaking my limbs again so I don't do it much

How tall are you?: 5'2"

Favorite subject in school?: art *fart noises*. But really everything, I even loved math until I got older and the dyscalculia and difficulty with abstract math started hittin. Biology was my fav science course.

Dream job?: In a communist world where you get paid for low tier jobs and everything isn't managed like shit and I have accessibility for my disability - no shot, a grocery store worker. I love answering questions and helping people, I love organizing things, and sometimes you're like.. the only person that some people will see that week, especially elderly people. You can be really helpful if you know a lot about all the different products. It's not just an underappreciated job in the typical 'fuck low wagers' sense but also I feel like people don't get how unlike a specalist store you may only visit every now and then unless its for your job or a very active hobby, a corner/drug/grocery store is a really important part of your neighborhood! And I'm really good at it!

[randomfoggytiger]

React: "Return to Me" (from the POV of Someone Averse to RomComs, Part IV): It Seems I Am Terrible with Names

To recap: Bonnie Hunt is great, sweetheart Elizabeth ??/Jane Bennett was doomed from the start, and Bob and I are in a war over his stupid name. He's called Ben now (unless I get particularly salty and start extrapolating dumb nicknames out of Bob.)

Ben takes his tasty little takeout out with him; but before he leaves, he notices Grace/Minnie Driver singing with the restaurant band.

Charlie's here-- he actually stepped out to convince Ben to come back in.

He failed his objective.

"I know you're going home."

"I'm not going home-- I gotta go to work."

So anyways, back at home--

No wait, car gag first. Little driver forgot to move the seat back.

That's funny, Bonnie, thanks.

So anyways, NOT-at-home Ben roughs it in his pickup at the worksite to eat his takeout.

...That's brilliant.

That's when he notices the "thank you for the heart" letter.

Just when you thought you're out you're back in.

Okay, wait, no, wrong prediction: this brings Ben more peace through a few more tears.

Minnie knows that the discarded phone was Ben's he'd accidentally left and has some thunkin' to do of her own.

Rando construction guy takes the voided plans home so his kids can color them in. Great touch, Bonnie.

Bob's flustered that the restaurant called about his phone-- "Who called? ...Who from the restaurant?"

Wait, I liked Bob so well in his new scenes I dropped Ben.

CURSES BOB, you've fooled me again.

Bonnie's low-key chaotic house.... *chef's kisses*

OH, Bonnie's name is Megan. ...Meagan? Meghan? Pfffft, Megan....

Am I just bad at names?

Kid so proud he relayed his mom's "daddy's a gorilla" joke from yesterday. Amazing.

The husband wants to set Grace/Minnie up with a former Father Joe. I think? It's always Father Joe... or is the husband's name Joe?

...Oh, no.

Nope, Joe is the husband. The priest's name is... ???

Minnie's OUTTA there.

The entire house is melting down over words and the ex-priest is here and everyone's aware this is going to be a disaster.

...Why does the ex-priest still have his priest garb?

BONNIE HUNT what have you DONE with this movie.

Charlie's really hittin' the town and wanting... fine, BOB, to join.

Bob's been turning his closet upside down. A little... nervous, a little anxious, a little twitterpated, are we now?

He dragged out the dusty dress shoes. This is serious.

I think it's catching, Bob, because Grace already has it.

Charlie calls him on all his lies-- "Oh, yeah? What's the [Cub's game] score?"

Bob fumbled the ball (ooh, nice pun; but--), or should I say the remote, and just chalks it up to "The Cubs are losing."

SKATE BOY'S BACK. I think I know what this next scene is, I saw the screenshots: Bob gets fashion advice from a kid 10+ years his junior. THIS is the premier content I signed up for.

"DAN THE MAN" AND "BOB THE SLOB"???? I love this kid; though, admittedly, he gets the better end of this name-calling schtick.

Kid won't be house-cleaner, too: "I don't think you can afford me."

Bob, your life of crime is going to land you in jail one day:

I wonder if Minnie will kick back?

"How do I look?"

"Tall."

"...Tall."

"Tall, yeah."

This kid is my sister, my kid sister is this kid. We've finally found someone I can relate to-- well done, gang.

Also, Ben the felon, he calls you Bob the Slob; so, I don't think this kid admires your drip. And look at his color theory and well-groomed nature. Yeah, this kid doesn't care for your middle-age-crisis look but he's also not even looking because he knows it will never meet his standards. "Tall" is all he wants to notice, Ben the Felon, and that's all he ever will.

Bonnie literally has Husband Joe (not Father ???) dragging all the kids to bed after the not-great-date while Bonnie-Megan is catching up with Grace-Minnie over the former priest's oddities. Stunning.

Also: Grace hates telling people about her heart surgery because they look at her as broken. Hmmmmmmmmmmm, foreshadowing, she's not going to tell Mons. Bobert hmmmmmmmmm.

Bonnie's family has no chill, wow.

Grandpa is blessed with work and calls his granddaughter by her first and middle name. Me heart, it beats like a little baby Irish sheep.

Couples just casually smooching to rub it in to Grace.

Old men are still arguing; but their fandom conversation has moved on from musicians to dream teams. This sounds exactly the "Japanese Vocaloid singers to 'Choose Your Apocolypse Team'" pipeline from back in the day.

Here comes Ben the Felon.

Grandpa has a great quip to Ben: "Now, you are either very late or very early, what's your view of it?"

Bob the Build-a-Better-Outfit is fishing for details about the lady who called (I'll bet it's the loud, happy waitress from Part... II? and not, as he hopes, Grace.)

Grandpa's straight-up fishing for singleton status. As the kids say: a legend.

Both of these men are fishing in the same pond without realizing.

As the kids have already said but I'm going to be those cringe Facebook memes posted years out of date: legends.

Grandpa got a new recruit for his Tumblr mutuals.

"This is my friend... uh..."

"Bob."

"Bob."

Friends wait.

"His wife is dead."

"HEEEEEEEEEEEEY" "HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII"

Bonnie, this is so good.

Angelo is Marty's BIL? That's why it's an Italian-Irish restaurant. I love that Bonnie didn't force that information into the first half, letting it pop up naturally.

Bob stands up politely when Sophie (the waitress-- okay, I will remember this. Sophiethewaitress, Sophiethewaitress, sophiethewaitresssophiethewaitress---) tells the boys she's heading home. She's so casual about the old guys trapping another friend... is this how Angelo and Marty got the other two guys to join?

"Sophie, his wife is dead."

The waitress isn't surprised if not fully convinced.

Sophie's sweet on Wally (who is the guy with the arm tattoo and is thoroughly confused and frustrated when the guys badger him about it after Sophie leaves.)

Even Bob chips in with a quiet "I think she likes you" and all the men are happy he agrees. Wally decides this means the new recruit has good taste since he "can't depend on you two hobos."

Build-a-Bob asks if everyone's gone for the night-- fishing that little fishing pole into that same little pond-- and those dudes are oblivious and MARTY HAD TO WALK SOPHIE OUT SO HE COULDN'T SCHEME but all is well because this movie's half over and the romance is bound to happen soon. Don't you worry, Bobby ol' buddy ol' pal.

Grace is still living with guilt that she is living someone else's life, I see. That Edgar Allen Poe heartbeat under the metaphorical floor of her ribs and all. But she's still grateful, if haunted.

There goes the magic again-- curtains whipping open so she'll stick her head out and see Bob. The 90s... thingamajig.

Bob's cleaning out the restaurant, but his sweepstakes have nothing to do with a broom. (I salute myself over that joke.)

Here comes Minn---

...I love this movie so much.

"I want you to meet my granddaughter, Gracie. Isn't she lovely?"

"Yes, yes she is."

I'm dying.

Bob can build both of them a better wardrobe.

"We spoke last night--"

NO BOB, YOU'RE KILLING THE SUBTERFUGE. BOB, NO. YOU'RE WAVING A RED FLAG IN FRONT OF GRANDPA MARTY. BOB DO YOU REALIZE WHAT YOU'RE DOING--

Doesn't matter because Minnie's melting in a graceful little pool over his jab at "water lady."

No joke, this immediate cut away--

made me bust out laughing. That never happens because I'm a private person who dies laughing inside (except for some exceptional X-Files episodes.) Bonnie, you did a miracle.

Grace caught all that and knows she'll never live this down.

Tumblr took away my screenshot space, so that's it for now (if I caaaaaaaan upload another part I will. Sometimes it gets really weird and tyranty about me flooding the system with hundreds of screenshots, I don't know whyyyyyyyyy~.)

Thanks for reading~

Enjoy!

#Return to Me #Part IV #DD #react #mine #analysis #txf #but not #Minnie Driver #Grandpa and Bob Both Have Plans #from the POV of Someone Averse to RomComs #It Seems I Am Terrible with Names

[anna-neko]

can i get a w00t w00t! for some ATLUS classics hittin the Switch today

absolutely nobody cares but here goes - back in the day Persona4 came on the PS2 with a bonus soundtrack CD!

when Persona3 went to the PSP, it was now P3P with the addition of a female-protag side! Persona 4 on the Vita became P4G with added Marie story-line

.....anyway..... i'm not sayin these games ate waaaaay too much of my life back then.... but .... <_<;;;

also when you accidentally summon satan.... no biggie

anyyyyyyyyyyyyyway, if anyone is gonna be getting into those now, word of advice! Keep 2 save files goin, because there's ...a... Bad End/Worst End / game keeps goin to Real End/ Marie 100% Final End

YES. P4G HAS MULTIPLE ENDINGS depending on...well.l. a lot! Good Luck! ~♪

#Persona games #older than i'd like to admit #oldtaku #video game #p3p #p4g

[of-elitiism]

“You didn’t have this scar the last time i saw you… what happened?” Achim

angst prompts part three.

Funny how quickly the years passed them by. It's like yesterday they were kids, messing around the kitchen, trying to bake a certain big grumpy wolf an absolutely horrendous birthday cake and nearly setting the kitchen on fire. The memory felt oddly recent but so far away at the same time, especially when he turns around and sees the young woman so carefully and lovingly tracing her fingers down his forearm. Chika changed so much, she's a lot more level minded, more calculated and confident... and also confrontational, especially when it's about things like the new scar that runs across his forearm.

Instinctively Achim flexed the muscles, opened and closed his fist and turned his arm around. Not to hide it, but rather to bring it more to light. For a moment he follows with his eyes the trace her fingers left before sighing and turning to look up at him.

"I--- kinda stopped a metal pipe from hittin' me in the head, heheh--" a dry chuckle at the end; this is no laughing matter and he knows it. "It's fine now, a couple more weeks and it's gonna go away. Promise it looks worse than it actually was. I'm fine, Bunny, i ain't gonna end up lookin' like a shish kebab like Bandit, alright?"

The scarred arm reached out and gently caressed her cheek as Achim smiled sincerely at her and leaned in to kiss her forehead. He too changed, quite a lot. No more dancing around the subject, hiding or denying things, no more concealing the truth from her, like he tried to do in the beginning. She deserved to have all of him just like he was grateful every single day to have all of Chika. His lovely Chika.

#thewanderingchika #[ voice - Achim ] #[ eeeeeeeeeyyyyooooo booooiiiii ]

[rosedtae]

KOO MORNING | JJK

→ pairing: Jungkook x female reader

→ genre: fluff, kinda secret relation

→ summary: your boyfriend finally comes back from his work trip. (With a surprise at the end)

→ wordcount: 1.9 k

→ warning: sleepy fluffy koo, too many pecks, slight mentions of sex nothing too smutty.

→ a/n: a little drabble because bf!kook has been hittin different lately. Some hardcore fluff. I hope you like it, I was really excited about posting this one. Send me your thoughts in my inbox-- here. I really love and appreciate your views and feedback🤎

→ song: Blush by Taba Chake

Series mlist

“Mhmm,” you purr, twisting your body when you feel a giant arm wrapped around your waist restricting your movements. Heat radiating from the body next to yours tempts you to nuzzle your face in the crook of the neck of the source. A deep sigh escapes your lips once the familiar woody scent infiltrates your nostrils.

 “Morning sleepyhead,” Jungkook’s raspy morning voice greets you. The tip of your finger skims over his Adam's apple to feel the vibrations induced by his voice. You pull your head away craning your neck to get a better view of your boyfriend. His hair messed up in the sexiest way possible– a total contrast to the bunny smile he’s flashing your way. 

“Koo morning baby,” the sleepiness evident in your tone makes ‘good’ come out as koo instead, earning a chuckle from Jungkook. “Koo morning,” he mimics in your sleepy tone before pressing soft feather-like kisses all over your face making your lips curl into a smile— eyelids fluttering shut as you struggle to wake up. Your fingers find a place in his messy hair not being able to resist the feel of his silky tresses.

You missed him, a lot. Waking up next to him cuddled in his arms, ranting to him about your day while he whispered sweet nothings to uplift your mood, him cracking random jokes that always make your belly hurt, or even the sweet silence that settles between the two of you, you didn't realise how much you yearned for these moments, how much you yearned for him— until he went on his work trip that lasted for two whole weeks. 

Surely the most dreadful two weeks of your life. He had been working on his project day and night giving it all his attention. You are glad it's finally over.  

“You have no idea how attention deprived I had been,” you pout. 

“Oh were you now?” he coos, lips skimming over your forehead as you nod in response. “But you were sleeping quite peacefully, not really giving a fuck.”

“Were you watching me sleep?.... creep,” you fake cough the last word playfully. “Well it's not really my fault,” Jungkook looks at you with pure adoration, placing a hand on your cheek to caress it, “you were drooling all over my arm.”

“Jerk,” you hit his chest lightly laughing at his stupid joke before rolling your eyes. “I'm having second thoughts about wanting all your attention now.”

“Good thing you don't have a choice,” he pulls you closer by his arm that is warped around you. Nuzzling his face in your hair, he mumbles, “Missed you.” And he really did. Six months into your relationship, you are still in your honeymoon phase. Jungkook loathes the time that is spent without you. “Time spent without you isn’t worth remembering” —he nonchalantly said it one evening when you went stargazing, it made your heart ache with affection as your cheeks grew hot.

When he was done working on his latest project the first thing he did was call you. He called you in the middle of your work to inform you about his flight back home. “I hope I didn't disturb you,” he said in his pouty voice. “Well, not really cuz you have been running on my mind since you left and I can't concentrate on anything,” you ran your fingers through your hair whispering the words as you made sure no one else heard it. “Aah, no wonder my feet were throbbing,” he replied in a fathomable tone as if believing the reason to be the true cause, being the natural flirt that he is.

You were at Jungkook’s apartment waiting for his arrival when you heard him enter. Launching yourself on him you hugged him tightly making him stumble a bit. He hugged you back once he placed down his bags, bodies fitting perfectly like the right pieces of a puzzle. You clung to him like a koala as he carried you to his bedroom. 

He sat on the bed with you straddling his lap. Your fingers played with the hair on the nape of his neck as your lips pressed soft kisses on his neck. Enjoying the intimacy of the moment as he gave you spoilers about his upcoming project. 

Jungkook’s fingertip gently traced the contour of your face, eyes following his finger. He tugged a strand of your hair behind your ear shifting his gaze to your lips before looking into your eyes. “I missed you,” the words spilled from your lips as your eyes grew shinier. I love you was all he said before cupping your cheeks as he leaned closer to place a gentle kiss on your lips. 

You sighed in satisfaction, feeling the press of his pillowy lips against yours. No rush, he kissed you so softly like you were made of glass. His tongue slipped between your lips and you felt warmth pooling in your abdomen. Every stroke of his tongue against yours made you melt even more. You love his soft kisses, they always make you melt until you are nothing but fluid, flowing right into his arms.  

“I should go shower now,” he patted your hips as a signal for you to get off of him so he could get up but you only replied by whining as you nestled your face in the crook of his neck. Jungkook chuckled at your neediness, “I’d love some company you know,” he stood up carrying you. “ But I don’t wanna shower right now,” you whined. “Pretty please, I’m too tired to wash myself,” he pouted giving you his puppy eyes. And who were you to say no to that face, you melted just like that.

And that's how you ended up in the bathtub, sitting between Jungkook’s legs, back pressed against his chest as he rubbed suds on your shoulders gently massaging them. You rested your head on his shoulder, smiling at him now rubbing the suds on your chest. “Weren’t you too tired to wash yourself,” you brushed off some pieces of his hair that were poking his eyes.

“Uhm,” he nodded, gently caressing your thighs. “But you just feel so soft,” he pressed a kiss right below your ear making you squirm. Taking some suds in your own hands you rubbed them on his biceps. His hands traveled down to your legs before you shut them close. You tutted, placing his tattooed hand away from your legs, “you should rest, the last thing I want is to strain you.” 

Jungkook pouted at your concern. You know that he has the sex drive of a beast and two weeks without sex is a lot for him but you don’t want to exert him after a tiresome 8 hours flight. “How about this,” you patted his hand, “let’s rest tonight and I’ll do whatever you want tomorrow if you are not feeling jet-lagged.” His face immediately brightened up from your offer. “Anything?” he smirked. “Anything,” you nodded. “Done,” he sealed the deal by placing a feather-light kiss on your left eyelid. 

You got out of the tub when the water started losing its warmth. Jungkook sat you on the counter before patting you dry with the towel. You took the smaller one and rubbed it on his head, in an attempt to dry his hair. Once free from all the wetness, you decided to wear one of Jungkook’s loose white shirts before going to bed.

You started searching for shows to watch while Jungkook plugged his phone in the charger. “Let’s watch the new episodes of twenty five twenty one,” he suggested, shaking his still wet hair “You didn’t watch it without me, did you?”

“Umm maybe-“

He gasped furrowing his eyebrows as he gave you the look of being betrayed. “Of Course I didn’t, I was just messing with you,” you cooed, opening your arms for him to hug you. “Good,” he bent down to hug you before settling on the bed, pressing a kiss on your cheek.

The light drops of water from his wet hair press against your right cheek, cooling it. You stayed in that position, watching Netflix before eating the pizza you ordered earlier. 

“I think we should tell your hyungs about us,” your fingers fiddled with the fabric of the comforter. “You sure baby?” Jungkook asked in surprise, the glint of happiness apparent in his eyes. “Yes, are you ready though?” You asked just to make sure.

“Of course I am,“ he pressed his forehead against yours nudging your nose with his, “I can’t wait to tell everyone that you are mine and I’m yours.” 

“Ishh so cheesy,” you replied, scrunching your nose but smiling like an idiot nevertheless. 

“Let’s tell them tomorrow though, I told them I’m coming tomorrow because I wanted to spend tonight with you,” he let out a breathy chuckle before pecking your lips. “Gotta think of a way to tell them, make it special maybe?” He pressed another peck on your lips.

“Okay,” you pecked back, starting a war of pecks that ended with the room filled with the sound of your giggles. You spent the rest of the night talking about things that happened while he was gone, things that happened during his trip, updating each other. You didn’t realise when you fell asleep, surrounded by his clean scent.

“How’s your jet lag?” Your fingers trace random patterns on his chest, getting a little annoyed at the cloth of his shirt for blocking skin-to-skin contact. “I actually feel pretty good this time, no jet lag,” he shakes his head.

“Good, can you take off your shirt now,” you pout, all you want to do now is feel his skin. You love running your hands on his back, his chest, just his bare skin. It feels smooth and warm. “Are you trying to instigate something, miss y/l/n?” He gives you a smirk accompanied by a raised brow, “but I shall do as you say,” he starts unbuttoning his shirt that you are wearing.

“Hey, not this one,” you giggle as he starts tickling you, after unbuttoning a few buttons at the bottom of your shirt. He places soft kisses on your stomach all the way to the waistband of your underwear, not stopping the tickles. 

“Jungkook,” you run your fingers through his hair, holding his head to stop the tickles. He smirks at you before nipping at your belly button gently. Your stomach growls making him chuckle, “looks like someone’s hungry, let’s go,” he picks you up, hooking his hands under your thighs as he exits the bedroom to go down to the kitchen. “Don’t forget about your promise,” he reminds you with a smirk.

You wrap your hands around his neck, placing a kiss on the top of his nose distracting him as he walks downstairs. He walks down carefully making sure not to stumble or get distracted by the attack of your kisses. Once you reach down the stairs safely, he captures your lips with his for a deep kiss, punishing you softly for your earlier distractions. 

“Mhmm,” you moan between the kiss as he places you down on the kitchen island, pulling away to break the kiss. “What are you doing here?” He asks with wide doe eyes.

You turn around to see a large banner which has welcome back! written on it, and the surprised faces of his six hyungs. “I gave you the keys for emergency,” Jungkook placed a hand on his mouth.

“You told us you were coming back today,” Namjoon argues before shifting his gaze to you.

“And you two,” Hoseok points his finger at you before pointing it at Jungkook and then back at you. “Ishh, my eyes,” Yoongi squeezes his eyes shut dramatically. 

Gasps and huffs fill the room as you look at Jungkook, his face mirroring your expressions. 

Well, at least now you don’t have to think of a way to tell them….

A very koo morning indeed.

･ﾟ: *･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ･ﾟ: *･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ･ﾟ: ･ﾟ: *･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ* ﾟ* ･ﾟ: *･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ*

if you liked this fic, don’t forget to like, comment, or send me your feedback, your views on it. I’d love to read your views.

-Rose 🤎

#jeon jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook fluff #jungkook drabble #jungkook x y/n #jungkook x oc #jungkook fic #jungkook scenarios #jungkook fanfic #bts #jungkook smut #if you squint lol #bts fanfic #bts fluff

[hearteyes-for-killmonger]

MochaMadness

Erik and friends have a bachelor party in Jamaica.

Erik

In my 33 years, I've seen a lotta shit. My Uncle Pete gunned down. My Granny Liza arrested at age 74 for manslaughter. The brunette from the third row in my Federal Income Tax course sucking off the professor. The birth of my nephew, a site I wish I could forget.

Nothing could prepare me for the sight of my boy Chance in a luxury villa with a garden, pool, full bar, and four luxury bedrooms with maids.. STILL simping over a jobless lil garden variety hoe. It's bringing down the mood, ya dig?

The boys are finally together again in person and this man is on the phone pandering. To his fiancé, sure, but give a nigga a few days. We did pay for the shit. "Chance. Can you tell her you'll call her back? Like damn let a nigga unpack."

"Bae calm down, I can't understand what you're saying when you're talking so fast. My Spanish isn't that good yet."

Every time Shailene calls we take a drink. Me, King, and Josh been ready to raise hell and slay broads since our plane touched down on this melanated island a few hours ago. The women are calling but so is Shailene.. Back to back.

"Talk to me. I can't fix it if you don't talk to me. Shay-Shay," Chance paces, "Baby stop.. What? Nah. No, I literally just got to the villa I would've called you after I unpacked.. What? I literally.. What are you saying?"

"You ain't even married yet," I whisper trying to give him some perspective though he walks off. "I'd have broken the engagement the first time she felt she could tell me what I could and couldn't do while having no money," Josh says watching Chance pace onto the balcony.

"I'll bring you NEXT TIME. Yes.. Baby.. Can you at least try to understand, I haven't seen all my friends together in years. We haven't been back to this villa since Erik and I passed the bar. You know how important this weekend is to me."

"You already paying for the wedding," I nearly yell getting pissed off for him, "the ring, and the honeymoon. She still got her hand out."

"Fuck that bitch." King smothers the words against his glass of Moscato. Again, Chance waves us off, but I've met the bitch in person and it's solid advice.

"Yeah. I hear you. YES," Chance sighs into the phone with more stress than he left Boston with. We all came from different states for this trip, myself coming out of Cali all the way to Jamaica to free my man's spirit. He not just whipped, he's brainwashed.

"I ain't ever getting married," Josh mumbles hittin up multiple DMs. Him and Teairra must be 'off' again, they break up every other month. "Not if she anything like Shailene. Shailene is fine as hell like the real Selena, not the J.Lo version, but it's her only quality.. Hell nah. Chance! You gotta get your sack back!"

"Shut the fuck up," Chance whispers at us. "No, no.. not you baby. Why would I.. What? What!? Is that what you think, I'm a cheat on you? This close to the wedding? Baby. You think I'd fuck up when the wedding is less than a month away? You think I'm stupid?"

"Let me talk to her," I reach out ready to end the call the second he hands me the phone though I figure he won't. I can hear Shailene's mouth through the phone. As a polyglot, one of my fluent languages is Spanish. She thinks we're here to taint her man and she's right, she's gone once I find him a cute ting to fuck on, his type but better. "Don't worry, Shay-Shay, he's a good boy," I speak over his shoulder petting his fade since he wanna act neutered. No confio en ti con ellos, she says and she's right. She shouldn't trust us, but she should trust Chance. Chance is a woman's wet dream. Sensitive, pliable, 34 with 2 mortgages, a car that's paid off, a decent paying job (not better than mine), a life insurance policy, and no kids. He's a family man set on doing it the right way.. Meet a girl, get married, have kids. Always been that man. He can do better than Shailene. Vas a engañarme, lo sé, she whines. "Girl relax, you wrapped Chance so tight around your finger he can't sneeze in the vicinity of a bitch. In fact, I scanned his plane ticket 'cuz the lady at the airport was under 60 with her ankles out and I know how possessive you gueras can get."

That gets her fired up. She's yelling in his ear. Chance looks like he's aging 2 years per minute. It triggers Shailene to bring up any young lady considering that women who want him, a shorty at his practice comes to mind that he told me about. She swears he's hittin that but he's not. I know because I told him to, but he ain't built like me, Josh, or King. "You too loyal for your own good to the wrong people," I tell him for the umpteenth time.

"Why you gotta go there," Chance fusses at the phone. I take my beer and me and Kingston head to the pool outside, calling Josh to meet us down there.. not to swim, but to plan.

"I can't take much more of this shit. I came to have fun and if she gonna keep calling, I'm a have to go and link with Chance later, on some other shit. I don't think I'm going to the wedding," Josh's head shakes. "I ain't wasting gas for shit I object to. Yes nigga, I OBJECT."

"I wanna crack that phone every time she call. I don't put my hands on women, but I better not ever meet this bitch. On some disrespectful shit," says King. "You gone see it on WorldStar if I show up at that damn wedding."

"Then who's grabbing Chance and who's getting the ride cuz I can tell you now Chance ain't got no balls with this bitch. She's gonna keep calling and we'll be on our own which defeats the purpose of a bachelor party. Come 9:30, we out even if we gotta drag him with us. We definitely not staying in tonight," I stare as the they throw out ideas and we put together a plan. We're gonna sleep off this liquor and go eat, then we're gonna head out and meet back up here at the villa. After that, it's party time. "I'm tryna become an absent father on this trip, get Chance laid, and get Shailene out the picture."

"That's the goal," Josh agrees. We all shake on it. King will do the shit that need to be done. I'll secure Chance after his meltdown which I know will happen. Josh will get the car. We'll all head to the mansion party after that. It's Mochafest so a lotta bad shorties are bound to be there.

Kamillah

An erotic black and white portrait hangs over the hotel bed. I'll be happy when I find something like that again, I miss waking up next to somebody other than Otis, my dachshund. I down my mimosa and continue my naked exploration of the hotel room. "I'm a need another one of these before I see another naked old white man. Why are they here?"

"For the brown sugar, duh! I don't know, I might leave Jamaica with a sugar daddy," Kendis smirks pulling off her tank top to scratch her under-titty in front of the open room door. Pulling my body cream from my bag, I layer it with my rosehip body oil. "Rub some on the crusty part between your toes too," she points earning a hotel pillow to her face.

"Don't come for me, come for these expired mayo packets walking around full on hard."

"Don't tempt me! If the dolla is right," she points. "Don't sleep on the salmonella peen."

"First of all.... that's disgusting. Second, I've just seen enough shapes, sizes, shades of dick in the past hour to start a porn studio so you fuck one, at least film it."

"THREESOME!"

"FUCK NO!" I almost lose my breath. This crazy bitch. "I'd sooner chew my own hand off." A whistle from passing patrons in the hall has me rolling my eyes. Black men about our age but unattractive. Kendis' goofy ass waves.

"Bitch. What you think?"

"Of them?! They look slow!"

Her jaw drops. Yes, I called them ugly and I said it so they could hear me. She shouldn't have asked me when they were still so close. "I don't know about all that," she shrugs. "But what I do know... is that you are slower than your wifi... Race you to the water!"

We sprint to the private owned cove with me on her ass, running on soft white sand and splashing into crystal blue water. It reminds me of how we used to run track together back in high school. I run smack into her and we both fall. The icy water laps my face, back, and thighs as I sit on wet sand listening to her cackle. "It is freezing," I mumble but this is still the most beautiful place I've even been. The trees, the sand, the water, the people. She bumps my arms and looks over my shoulder pointing her chin. I follow her eyes to a young couple having sex on top of a blanket.

"I'm tryna be like that on somebody's son."

"That's what we here for, to be on our thot shit," I remind slinging water in her face as I take off down the shore. I want it too. We eat grilled fish to our fill at the beach grill and I have another free mimosa, chatting with some hotel guests who are very friendly with an extra nasty twinkle in their eye, tryna fuck their way around I assume. I make eye contact with Kendis and I know she's thinking what I am. They wanna smash and we're already naked. I lean over to whisper, "I'm fuckin someone's son before I leave."

"I'm fuckin someone's man," she laughs. "Maybe someone's father."

"Anyways bitch," I stand ready to go and walk away from the bullshit. "You ain't gone stop until you caretaking as someone's 30 year old grandma. All for that retirement fund."

"No girl, the life insurance policy," she scoffs, "The fuck?"

Back in the room, we shower together get off the grit of the beach. When her hand slips down between my thighs, I'm confused but then I think fuck it why not. We're both tipsy and what happens in Jamaica stays in Jamaica. She slides her fingers over my skin and slowly lowers, crouching down with her eyes on mine. I raise my thigh to make it easy, protecting her face with my pussy. I would've never known she had a hurricane tongue had I not experienced it, she uses her lips and her tongue together in a motion that has me asking for lessons.

"Don't be scared, you licking it like a cat. Milli... Just stop, that feels weird, you gotta commit. Really flatten your tongue and use it."

"I can't," I sit up irritated. "I tried." I give her fingers and return the favor that way but I can't be down here licking vagina. It just.. I can't do it. We rinse off and head to the pool where I post up in an available lounging chair watching beautiful black people and ass fine niggas through my raybans. Kendis finds her way through the crowd and next to a woman with a bun of black and purple box braids who's smoking in the pool. She's like a moth to a flame clocking the smokers. Maybe we'll all smoke together at some point this weekend. I could see an orgy taking place and honestly, I might be down.

The man in the pool with them looks just like Jacqueez because of the long thin dreads in about five cornrows going back. His body language tells me he's gonna go for it and I know my friend, she's already plottin on this dreaded dark skin. They all talk and touch, handling each other as if they're at the start of a porno and then the man grabs Kendis' waist pulling her flush against his hips in broad daylight and among a crowd.

I lower my shades to get a better look and I'm not the only one watching the show. It's happening fast and publicly. Kendis open mouth frenches the woman as she raises her smoke above her head and people in and around the pool cheer. The couple starts to sandwich her, passing the smoke and grinding to the music being blasted. This shit ain't everyday.. It's something I'd have never seen back home. Kendis ain't bout this in her normal 9 to 5 life, but at Mochafest? Anything can happen. Good music, good liquor, good food, sexy people, naked glistening bodies, dancing, havinh fun on a beautiful resort. We all grown here, it's impossible not to act up.

Two sets of lips are on Kendis' body, the man licking up her neck and shoulder as his hands move up her narrow waist to cup her small boobs. I spot a shining diamond wedding band on his left hand and also on the girl with the purple braids. Newlyweds. The wife's lips move down Kendis' bare chest and as Kendis pushes the girl's head under the water, the husband takes the dutch back to smoke.

"Damn Kendis, I didn't know you got down like that," I yell out cackling at her nerve to drown a bitch for some head. A girl in the pool yells for next. I don't know if she plans to be the eater or the eatee but either way I'm down to watch. I record a lil bit for memories sake and then the woman underwater comes up for air giving the man an equal chance to go down. He takes a different route lifting Kendis' thighs over his shoulders as he lifts her up out of the pool, her back resting on the concrete. He's not that tall or big but he's still fairly strong to be lifting her just to eat that thang. My hand goes between my thighs though I can't fully see the action with his head bobbing in the way and people blocking the view. I capture some of if when they start fuckin, all three of them on the side of the pool with people standing over to spark them on. I'm fingering myself to mimic the man's pace inside of Kendis, a mix of slow rolling hips and snappy pumps, very inconsistent but he's doing a little something. When they take a break, I wipe my fingers on my towel. It looks like I've got the nonverbal invite to join the woman with the mimosa and her man in the pool for some action like Kendis is getting, but I cross my legs back and gracefully decline. They move onto the next girl who's been sitting on the edge of the pool chatting.

"I'm going to the room," I yell and Kendis waves deciding to stay with the couple she's just mixed with. It's my cue to go relieve some more sexual tension of my own since I'll have the room to myself and that's what I do. I finger myself to the sound of moaning and bumping through the wall from the other neighboring room and I think of going over to knock since I can't help but feel a little jealous. My post-nut clarity says no though and instead I explore the resort.

The staff are social and flirtatious, one, Laurent offering a tour which I accept, following him around the facilities. He brags on the food and entertainment, handing me another mimosa and we take a walk together through the trail. The trees are absolutely beautiful. When we're truly alone he shares that the trail we're on is where a lot of people come to fuck and after a moment of expectant eye contact we both laugh. Me, because I'm not about to fuck this man. I'm very picky with mine. "Just putting it out there," he smiles walking on.

I continue through the resort. There's a naked side and a clothed side. I would have to get dressed to access some of the entertainment on the clothed side so that's what I decide to do and on my way back out of my room, fully dressed, I pass another room that's hosting a full on orgy party. It seems lit but it's all white as if they found each other and there's nothing remotely attractive in the piles of raw chicken flesh so I keep walking and run into Kendis who's back in time to roll with me to the other more prudent side of the resort. It's like leaving Sin Island to return to society. I feel deviant as fuck.

Erik

Back in the balcony Chance paces on the phone overlooking a sculpted expanse of designer grass and flowers in a fenced in square. It's 9:30. I look to Kingston as a cue that it's time for action and grab Chance by his shoulders as he smacks the the iphone out Chance's hand. It falls over the balcony.

"That's it! No more soap opera bullshit," King yells and I wince as Chance catches him in the jaw. King boxes though, his jaw ain't made of glass. "Oh? What's up," he says putting his hands up to spar. It's a spar to him but Lovestruck is tryna land more hits than King let his non-boxing ass get. We told this fool to get a trainer and get on his shit.

"Y'all owe me a phone! Got me fucked up, don't touch my shit!" He's mad mad. Even more mad because he can't whoop nobody here ass.

"I wouldn't have done that, but it's done." I step between to spare the lil dignity my man got left. "Leave her where she is for a few days. That's it! She'll be alright. You deserve a few days that's why we're all here.. to have some fun and get away nigga, get away!"

He sighs, stress eating him up. "She gonna think I'm dead in a ditch with a damn prostitute."

"Like you could get that lit," King laughs.

"It don't matter." I shake my head watching this man panic. "Look at me. It does not matter bruh, listen. With no job, no apartment, and no real skill where do you think she's going? You her sucka, she ain't going anywhere. YOU need to step up. YOU in control."

"This your bachelor party bro, as big as it get," King adds. "It's your last time as a single man and you got all your bruhs right here and this beautiful island. We here for you."

"Nah y'all came to grab some ass," Chance mutters.

"That too," King admits. We never hid that, that's been the goal, other than emancipating Chance.

"And stop disrespecting my woman, she's important to me.. I chose her and I'm serious about her."

"Aight.. aight cool," I nod escorting his sensitive ass to the rental sprinter van where Josh is waiting. Anything to move this along. "I'm a say this and let it go. You gone think about what we said one day and it's gonna be too late when she abscond with half your shit in the divorce settlement."

"That wouldn't happen."

"So what that prenup looking like?" Crickets. "Every nigga think it won't happen to them, that love will spare them. You keep thinking that."

We get in the luxury van and instantly I can picture women all through it. The things I'll do in this van... When I look at Josh and King they laugh thinking the same damn thing. It's about to get real nasty.

Kamillah

"LOOK AT THE FUCKIN VIEW," I yell from the mansion balcony with another drink in hand winding to the afrobeats booming from the party. I've never been in a mansion before, this is my first time. It's also my first time in Jamaica and my first time at a party like this. I've never been this excited. It looks like the cookout met with Afropunk and created Freaknik 2.0.

Everyone's dancing, the music is hitting, the drinks are hitting, the food, the people. It's a vibe! The mansion overlooks the Caribbean Sea so we all are taking pictures as we pose in front of it, me flashing my titties for the party and the camera. I'm wearing a swimsuit like a lot of others.

Moving through the crowd, I dance with my drink and look to get to know somebody tall and chocolate who didn't come here with a wife or a girl. Me and Kendis keep getting the attention of couples.

"Hey pretty girl!" As if reading my mind, a tall darkskin guy in a yellow shirt puts his dick on my back and I back it up, winding and grinding on him as he holds my hips, churning like smooth butter. When I throw it back, he nearly falls.

"You can't handle this ass, baby."

"I'm drunk, I'm off balance," he mutters, hands still gripping my hips.

"Baby, so am I." I do it again and he dips. It's like he's riding a bull, he doesn't give up. I blink watching the guy who's just stopped in front of me try to sandwich me between himself and the yellow shirt. This guy looks strong with slim defined arms and abs but yellow shirt is still the smoother dancer. Being in the middle, my leg is wrapped around the guy in front.

Ass is in abundance tonight. I see bathing suits, thongs, and shorts twerking, daggering, and bouncing as the DJ yells over the track getting people more and more hype. Kendis joins the dance competition going up against five or six other girls who jiggle thighs and ass like jello lightening, performing stripper moves with no pole. I scream and record her as they grab and climb on whatever the fuck they can find, falling and jumping back up. Kendis hits a split near the cameras, her lil asscheeks in HD bouncing and jiggling as the DJ hypes. Another girl does a split in competition but Kendis tumbles channeling her gymnastics days and hits her split again and again bouncing.

"LET'S GOOOO," I yell watching her pop back up and bask in the glory of her win. "That's how you do it." I'm glad it's on camera. "She did not come to play with these hoes." She flashes the cameras that are on her and I feel the heat of the liquor coming for me, ready to get out of this lil bathing suit. Almost instantly Kendis is on a fine ass new guy with a fresh fade, grinding and popping her lil ass. The wonderful thing about Mochafest is that it's almost impossible to end up with a broke or ugly nigga considering it costs money to participate, especially to get to Jamaica. This crowd consists of the grown and sexy, the people who will go right back to work after this weekend ends.

In another competitive crowd men are jumping off of more random shit and landing on top of spread legs on the floor. People are throwing each other around and dry humping, me included since I'm now drunk and giving no fucks. I climb the same structure I saw someone get on and find a guy who makes eye contact, leaping off into his arms thinking he better catch my ass. He looks sturdy and tall enough, he'd better think fast. I almost panic once I'm airborne but he rushes in and catches me so I don't hit the ground.

"Good catch!" I wrap my legs around his waist and feel his sweaty skin and abs since his white shirt is pulled up over his head with his arms still through the arm holes. "So it's not just me and the alcohol, it's actually hot as fuck in here!"

"I'm sweating." He bounces me on his bulge on beat, still holding my weight. Big man, I feel it. He has to let me down to twerk and throw it back and up into him, hands on my legs and then the ground for leverage. This one doesn't fall, he's got his legs locked. I throw it back harder trying to make him but his boys stand behind him to hold him up! He wraps his hands tight on my waist and throws me forward with his hips and I brace my palms on the ground for stability. He leapfrogs me which catches me off guard. Twice this man jumps over my ass! I can't stand up because I'm scared to get kicked in the face. He straddles my back with support from his buddies to keep his weight off me only to spin like he's breakdancing and have his dick end up flush in my in my face though he's wearing shorts.

I don't know how he accomplishes this next feat, but he wraps my waist and pulls flipping me upside down supporting my full weight in a standing 69. I grab his thighs for support because I'm nervous as hell. Meanwhile Kendis is laughing and watching it go down. I have never in my 30 years of life been manhandled to this degree that I feel like I'm in someone's wresting ring.

"Get it Erk," his friend yells with a drink raised. I'm starting to see that it's four guys together.. one of them grinding on Kendis.

He flips me back upright and grabs the titty that's fallen out of my top, squeezing and folding it back in as I stare feeling distant as if it's happening to someone else and I'm just watching. "Yo name Erk?"

"Yeah," he mutters hands still all on my titties. Not a man of many words, but still fine milk chocolate with locks in two french braids and a full goatee. Ab game crazy. I touch him since his fingers are so busy and put my hand directly in his shorts to feel what I felt earlier. "Don't stop," he whispers once I'm there and we rock on beat as I give him a lil quick handjob with his arms thrown over my shoulders giving him a resting station, against me.

I can hear him pant, his breath on my ear and tickling my neck so i keep stroking it to hear him swallow and breathe hard with soft nearly inaudible moans mixed in. It turns me on so much I get into it even more, wanting him to cum as bad as he wants to. I can tell he's just as drunk as me the way it's like he has no control over the little helpless sounds that escape covered and hidden by the music. He nearly rests his full weight on me when he cums but picks his weight up and groans where he stands. I wipe it on his shorts not thinking.

"Put your ass on me," is the first thing he says and I start twerking against him back in dance mode moving in tandem with his hips. Then he squats so that his face is in my ass, head through my thighs and crawling through. When he gets up, I'm lifted high sitting on his neck with my legs dangling on his chest anxious of the height. Why does this man keep picking me up when we both fuckin drunk? I grab onto him to stay upright and then he just let's me fall backwards before he snatches my whole body around to the front of him, my pussy in his face as I hang upside down holding onto his thighs, my boobs completely knocked out my top. I've never been thrown around like this, like a sack of potatoes.

With an audience he buries his face in my pussy. It's covered, barely. I still feel his tongue through the material licking and pushing. I fan out my legs to let him get it if he choose and feel flushed. It's only a little that he gives me and through the bathing suit before he sets me back on my feet but I want more. I pick my leg up and pull him nearer and he touches me but that's it. "We having a lil get-together at the villa, special invitation only, come through."

"Freaks only," one of the other guys adds.

"We going," Kendis answers for us both still dancing on him.

"You can ride with us in the Benz," Erk points to the exit.

Erik

"Take the stick out your ass and go get some," I whisper to Chance patting his butt like a teammate to get him in the game. I put my arm around my dance partner and escort her to the magic that is our rental omitting the fact that I also invited two other women who are accompanying us and my boys. I put my left arm around one. Each of us brought back shorties we pulled that were down to get freaky except for Chance so it evened out. He could fuck one of ours. He'd be the only sober person in the van other than the driver.

I grab the girl on my left by her face and kiss her putting my tongue in her mouth while I slide my hand up the thigh seated on my right looking for that hot wet spot to finger. The girl on my lap, I'm hoping she'll catch my hint when I keep moving my hips up. Every time the van bump on the road I feel pressure and see flashes in my mind of that ass jumping on my dick. That's what the basket of condoms are for. "Fuck me." I let the girl on my left go to grab the girl on my lap rubbing on her thigh. "Fuck me," I repeat when she turns around to look at me. This ain't no ride to take unless you giving a lil something.

"Move," says the girl on my left staring at her until she stands up bracing herself against the ceiling. They switch spots and I get what I want, this girl riding my dick in the back of the van while I finger one and kiss another one. Josh is across from us in the other bench seat with a bitch riding him cowgirl jumping hella hard and they're loud as shit while his other girl is watching.

King is in a solo chair getting domed like he really the king while two other girls sit in a chair fuckin each other. Chance is sitting up front being a good boy and staying out of trouble but trouble finna find his ass. As his friends, we're not letting him pass up this night without fucking somebody or getting some head. No one has to know.

"You like that big daddy?" Shorty on my lap looks back.

"Hell yeah," I give that ass a lil tap. "Keep riding that dick.. Keep riding that dick." Meanwhile shorty on my left has her leg up in the air to let me finger the fuck out of her while she rubs it. Shorty on my left kissing my neck. I could bust a nut right here, but I've been drinking. This is the freakiness I've been craving. "Switch," I tell them giving the first one another chance on this dick. "Get you a condom out the bucket, girl." I thought the issue before was fucking me raw, but she was about to sit her raw coochie on my shit. It don't matter how drunk I am, I'm not drunk enough for that. I watch her put the condom on me and then she starts to bounce on it, her ass  even fatter than the other one's. Between her and the van bumping.. I nut. "Switch it out." I toss the condom in the trash bag and instead of riding my dick, shorty to my left chooses to suck it through the condom. "I can't feel shit," I lie wanting her to take it off because I know them lips got power. It's just a lil head, it's not like having sex.

"Next time bring your test papers instead of all these condoms," she laughs losing her balance. She's right. I wasn't about to eat her pussy straight either in the club. "I hate when bitches make sense and they drunk," I say but then I think about it. "No I don't.. Y'all want some snacks? Chance. Bring the bag of snacks back here." Josh's second girl drops out of fuckin him to eat chips and I can't help laughing at his face while he's sitting there mad. I shrug. "My bad bruh," but I still can't stop laughing at the shit. I rub my face laughing forgetting I got pussy juice all over my hand. "Haaaa," he laughs watching me lowkey panic because my mind ain't sharp and I don't know what this means but I just wipe it off.

"I get tested," the owner of the juices says from the floor with her cheetos. "I don't know what y'all niggas do."

"We go together every year," says the girl who was just riding Josh, now she's eating plain chips.

"Aye," I yell at Chance. "We got anymore plain chips?" I'm in the mood for some, watching her eat them, making them look good.

Back at the villa, we give the girls a tour of the premises and every room. Then we split up one at a time, all the shorties running to find some place on the property to hide until it's just me, Josh, Chance, and King left standing in the bar. I pour four drinks and we peer pressure Chance to knock one back pouring him alone a refill. "Twenty bucks," King says. "Knock it back. Take that shit to the head. Don't be a pussy." We go wild when he not only does it but says to pour him one more to prove a point that he ain't no bitch. "I don't know," Josh teases, "It been looking and sounding like bitch since we got here." I see the fire coming back in old boy. Chance ain't been set free since we both passed the bar. That was years ago. "It's time man, just let go," I tell him. "All that shit.. let it gooooo, let it gooooo!"

"Aight shut up," King pushes by, "Let's find these bitches, I got seed to spill."

"Josh thinks I'm funny.. Wait, I got the condoms on me," I drop them on the bar splitting them up ready to seek out some pussy. The balcony is clear, the bar is clear. I check the bedrooms first finding one of King's girls hiding in the closet. "Freeze," I point. "That pussy under arrest." She raises her hands. "Drop the draws and surrender that pussy."

"Yes, Officer!"

"Assume the position and prepare for frisk." I hit her from the back with her hands against the wall while I stroke her shit. I pin her wrist on her back when she reaches. Every time she moan and talk her shit it keeps me going like I'm on one. "Fuck me back. Throw it back. Uh uh, don't stop." I can hear someone walking in the room. It's King. We nod at each other and he moves on to find another bitch. This one's occupied. "Who was that," she asks having missed it. I tell her nobody. "Who you worried about huh? I'm fuckin you right now." I hold her neck and dig in that pussy talking directly in her ear. "I asked you a question. Uh uh.. Don't do that.. Don't run from me, bitch com'ere." I pull her in to dig deeper in that pussy. "Who's dick you want?"

"Yours," she moans sucking in air. I bite her neck feeling her about to cum.

"Say that shit."

"Yours," she sighs tryna catch her breath while I choke her.

"You my bitch right now until I'm through. Who's bitch are you?"

"Yours."

"Say yours, Big Daddy," I tell her, swimming in it. I let her go when she says it, calling her a good girl as I put my shorts back on. I back out from the closet. Whistling I walk through the halls wondering who's next. I pass Chance sitting on one of the beds with one of the girls and the door cracked. Curious, I pause next to the door.

"I 've done everything to secure her because I know what it's like to be cheated on. I know what it's like to doubt everything someone says because of your past. I just want her to see that I'm not the niggas in her past," Chance whines like he's on a therapy couch. "I love her so much it's hard when you can't trust me. What you want me to do? I'm a good man."

"You are a good man," I hear her agree.

"I am, I'm a damn good man. I got a car, a job, no kids, a house, and I'm loyal. What more do you want from me?"

"Sis is trippin. I'd take you in a heartbeat. I have one kid, he's 7 and with my sister right now until I get back, but I have a two-bedroom apartment and I work at All State. I don't need your money, but I'll damn sure take it. Pick a bill!"

"Oh I pay everything! Every-thing! Ask her to pay one bill, her phone, and suddenly I ain't shit."

"Sis out of her damn mind. What do you see in her?"

"Love..."

"Ha! Well, let me tell it to you like this. You think you in love but you ain't had it until you felt truly at peace with the woman you with and all of that seems chaotic to me. Let me show you what you could have.."

I take a peak and catch Chance with his eyes closed getting some bop and walk away hype to tell the boys our plan is working.

"Erk," I hear the voice of one of mine coming from a bathroom across from me. She gives me the eyes to follow her, so we walk down to the garden. "How much did y'all pay to rent this? This place is nice. How did y'all find it?"

I look back to the villa wondering how many women are left waiting to be fucked. I could be piping something, but I guess watching the moon outside in the fresh air with a pretty lil shorty is good too. "It's expensive," I admit finding a bench to sit on, "But we're out here for my boy Chance throwing him a bachelor party."

Kamillah

"That quiet guy? Aw.. He's cute too. He looks so uptight but it makes sense now. That's cute." He barely said three words the whole trip in the van. I thought maybe he was gay.

"That's not cute, his fiancé has him by the balls. He can't breathe without permission. Imagine what's it's gonna be when they get married."

"You tryna save him," I nod getting the picture. "He's a doormat. She's a tyrant. Maybe he just needs a woman to tell him what to do. Some men are like that."

"Not my friend though, not if I can help it. I'm tryna get him out."

"Yeah, I guess..," I have to laugh. I can't see it for him. "It's nice you're trying. You know I passed him in the hall and nothing happened? I kind of figured something was up with him."

"Don't hold it against him.. I'd be proud to add you to my count," he smirks. "To be honest, I've had my eye of you since the party. We didn't get to..."

"No we didn't get to," I stare watching him bite his lip. "You got your condoms?" I smile and he shakes his head. "I'm just messing with you," I kick at the grass. "I'm careful about hooking up too. Gimme the carfax and even then I'm too grown to play russian roullete with my health or my uterus."

"I got my test results on my phone. This is a carefree weekend, but reality is reality. I like my life."

"What do you do," I cross my legs curious. He gives the obvious answer, "You," of course but doubles back to answer. "Nah, I'm.. I'm a tax attorney." I bite my lip and straighten thinking I may have just hit a jackpot. "From Cali," he adds.

"That's not too far from.. that's a lie. You're far," I laugh. "I'm in Texas. I'd make a trip though with Kendis. We've been thinking where our next location should be. I've known her since high school. Maybe we could meet up for drinks."

"Maybe I'd do your taxes." He has a beautiful smile too.

"Maybe I'd hook you up with some free samples. I'm a chemist. Cosmetic chemist."

"Damn. Brains and beauty. I see you." He nods. It's all fine and dandy, but I'm still horny. I fucked his friend but I was still waiting on him.

"Is it bad I'm just thinking about sex right now?" I look at him and he laughs.

"Here I am trying to be respectful when really I'm imagining your legs over my shoulders. You ever have sex outside in the grass?"

"In high school," I admit thinking back fifteen years ago. I was so bad it's embarrassing. "I snuck out of class and me and this boy went to the football field behind the bleachers.. Shit we did that like twice.. Oh my God," I laugh. I didn't expect to admit that. I am drunk.

"You've never had sex in a garden in front of a villa in Jamaica."

"Neither have you," I tell him pulling his hand and laying him down into the grass next to the pink flowers which catch the moonlight. "Just let it happen," I shush touching his lips as climb over him and untie my top, ditching my bottoms. My nails trail down his chest to his abs and hips. I pull down those shorts freeing that bbc and eyeing it up close. I use my mouth to apply the condom coming up to position myself over him, my titties in his face, sliding him in for the ride of his night. "Look at me," I command for eye contact as I bounce on it, like Megan. His hands sprawl out wide on the grass freeing me to have my way. I dance on it, winding my waist and keeping time. His chin's in the air and he keeps licking his lips, his chest visibly rising and falling. He touches my ass and I continue, putting my hand on his exposed neck as I give him the work. This is me going easy. I bite my lip and drop my weight taking all of his dick when I go down and bouncing back up. His eyes pop open and he squeezes my ass. "Hands down," I tell him. He looks like he's tryna escape or explode. "You wanted this pussy, lil daddy?" I smirk licking my lips. "Huh? Slut you out?"

"Fuckkkk."

"Yesss," I mock feeling evil. "Take that pussy hoe! That dick is mine hoe.."

"AH-" he malfunctions tryna get up and lay down at the same time. "Ahh.. Mmm... Mm-" Making noises that make no sense, high pitch squeaks hidden in deep rumbling growls. He's primal. His breathing everywhere but normal.

"Huhh? Yeah?.. Yeah?" I smirk trapping him on the ground and holding his arms down. He looks like he'll chew through his lip. "I dare you mothafucka," I smirk seeing in his face he wants to flip me over so he won't nut. He's distancing himself trying to think of something else to last. I grind and put my titties on his face. "Do it mothafucka, I won't stop you," I sing squeezing his neck in my hand. He does, flipping me over in his place. I put my hand right back around his neck as he slides back in closing his eyes. "Look at me," I remind him. He pins my thighs back and sinks in deep looking in my eyes. "Gimme the dick," I whisper watching it slide in and out. It's so good I could take him back with me to Texas. "Like that," I tell him when he starts to grind in, pulling out to leave the head in, grinding back in deep. Most guys will switch up at this point and do something different right when I'm about to cum. I feel myself about to cum. "Yes," I whisper. "Like that, like that.." I tremble feeling his hand around my throat as I cum. He doesn't stop even when I scratch him and grab the grass pulling it out. I don't want him to stop. Even when I'm coming and it's so sensitive I'm shaking, I still want it. It's too good. "I can take it," I tell him but I can hardly catch my breath. He's struggling I notice and I smirk content to watch him struggle to keep up. I think he notices because he gets a new wind and fucks the shit out me.  "Ooh shit," I laugh breathless. He collapses on the grass next to me breathing hard. I watch the moon shining over me and illuminating the flowers while I catch my breath. I'm so glad I came to Jamaica. I laugh and he does too. I wonder if he was thinking something similar.

We walk to the bar, me dragging it feels like because I'm exhausted.. and find one of his boys there chillin with a girl from the van. "Y'all should check out the garden," I hint wanting the space for me and Erik alone to chill and talk, but I get a better idea. "Where is the water? I need to be drinking water," I tell him. We move it to the kitchen where we can both get water because I am honestly thirsty as hell, I have a migraine coming on, and I've drank enough liquor to last the weekend. I press my temples to stop the ache.

"Where you staying?" I give him the resort name and tell him what it's like there despite my headache. He and his boys almost stayed there. "Now I kinda wish we had, but I still like this villa. What you doing tomorrow? King's driving the girls back to their hotels. He could take you and your friend back or y'all could hang here."

"Nigga it's past my bedtime and I have a headache the size of Texas. I'm going to find a place in here to crash and we'll figure all that out in the morning. I have to talk to Kendis anyway."

Erik

Breakfast is downstairs by the time I get down there. I don't ask who it came from or who made it, I just eat and bring some up to shorty who's still crashed in my bed. "What is your name," I ask when she sits up. "Been talking all night, I don't even know it."

"Kamillah," she sniffs rubbing her nose aggressively. "Milli for short." I like Kamillah. I don't think I've ever met one but it sounds like a name I'd give my future daughter. Maybe Kamillah or Reina. Something like that. I hit the shower and change before heading back down to see who else is awake. There were a few girls down before and Mike. Now Josh is there with his girls including Kendis. I kiss the other two of mine on the cheek slapping them on the ass.

"Where's Milli," the girl ID'd as Kendis looks my way to ask. I nod her upstairs and watch her go up before turning back to Josh.

"Where's Chance?"

He laughs, walking around me to stand on the stairs so I follow him back up. There is Chance in his bedroom with that same girl as before laid up. Both knocked the fuck out. I close the door gently so not to wake them up and rub my hands together. This might be it. I go to tell Kamillah.

"I hope it work out for him. I'm sure it seems like anything is better than that other girl y'all keep talking about. She sounds terrible."

"Yeah.. so use my shower," I tell her. "I can loan you a shirt and some shorts just give them back before you leave Jamaica or.. I could give you my P.O. Box and you just mail it when you get home."

"How about I bring them to Cali when I come?"

"If you come to Cali, bring them free samples you was talking about last night, my skin can get a lil oily. I might need something for that."

"I got you," she winks getting up.

"You got me?" I watch her walk to the bathroom closing the door. I was gonna get one more quickie in before she left. If last night was that good with a condom, I'm curious how good it would be without one when we can fully unleash and be as nasty as we wanna be. I'm willing to meet up again, even for drinks. I walk her downstairs and see her out to the van along with the other girls. King's driving them each to their respective hotels and resorts. "Chance," I remember going back by his room. The girl with him is the last one and they're still sleep. It's almost an hour later that they come down together dressed with her in his clothes. He still looks exhausted.

She finds the leftovers from breakfast and makes a plate carrying it over to Chance to share. He picks at it, but I can tell he's stressed. He probably feels bad about sleeping with this girl and cheating on Shailene. Her hooks cut deep. He looks up and catching me staring. For a minute we both stare, me wondering where his head's at and hoping it's not even more fucked up than before.

He sighs. "I don't know how I'm gonna tell her.. I can't do this. I've tried.. Haven't I tried?"

"Yeah man, you tried," I nod.

"Either believe in me or you don't. I shouldn't have to keep proving myself," he looks up for approval. I nod. "Yeah, I think I'll tell her today. The wedding's off. I just need time to be alone before I get in another relationship." I nod again, not wanting to say too much to push him. That way he isn't pissed at me down the road for ruining things for him. I notice shorty keeps her words short too. I bring her water as an offering to stick around. He probably said some things that sounded like regret when he woke up, but he'll come around. He just needs a little time to straighten his shit out. I'm sure she understands. She seems like she does.

Having missed King, we initially decide on calling a car to take shorty back to her hotel, but Chase breaks out of his funk enough to ask her to stay. He offers to take her around the town and back to her hotel once King returns the van and neither Josh nor I intervene. He can have it the rest of the weekend if it means Shailene is out of the picture. "Take my phone," I tell him when King gets back.. just in case he gets bold and decides to end things with her on the ride. He takes it catching my drift. It looks like he's gonna do it. "This might be it," I say again once he's gone.

"This might be it," King repeats watching the door like he's scared Chance might come back. I feel like a worried father.

"How about last night," Josh grins changing the subject.

"I might be a father after last night," King admits. Me, however.

"I think I might meet up with her again.. After we leave Jamaica.. For drinks.."

"Right right.. drinks," Josh smirks eyeing me. I wink.

"What can I say," I smirk rubbing my hands together. "Bring on the rest of the weekend!"

THE END

@nahimjustfeelingit-writes @goddessofthundathighs @theegoldenchild @blackpantherimagines @blackpantherismyish @blackpinup22 @abeautifulmindexposed @thegucciwaffle @winteroflife @youreadthatright @thadelightfulone @forbeautyandlife @wakanda-inspired @thiccdaddy-mbaku @thotyana-in-this-hoe

#original #erik killmonger #killmonger #erik stevens #erik killmonger fanfiction #erik stevens au #black panther killmonger #black panther fanfiction #mochamadness #erik x oc

[andiitom]

WARNING: use of swear words

note: for my curly cuties 💙

LUCIFER

He claims to know everything about humanity and their trends but he a damn lie he hasn't been up stairs in a 1000 years.

He’s always making snarky comments to mc about their hair being “unkempt” so when mc came home with BAGS full of hair products he had to make his opinion known.

“Are these things that necessary, Mc? Look at my hair all I use is water and shampoo”

“Is that why it looks like dog fur?” oop-

For the longest time he thought Mammon let his hair do whatever and thought he was just buying things just to spend money again.

But after watching mc do their hair he can admire mc's effort they put into doing their hair.

So one day Mc comes back to HOL a basket full of hair stuff, they really meant just to get Night Motomuni Hair Cream but got anything but that.

They went up to Lucifer as Mammon disappeared on them while they were out

"Yo Luci, Mams ditched me come help?"

Didn't try attempt to hide his smirk, "Oh but of course mc"

He was a bit overwhelmed when they dumped the contents of the bag on the counter.

Lowkey gives the best head massages. He had mc falling asleep in the sink.

Then they got to the detangling part and mc thought they mama was bad. He had that GRIP on their head.

"LUCIFER!"

"I'm not even doing it that hard"

Mc swears the got a bald spot now because of him.

Yo but when Mammon came home he was cracking up when he saw the amount of hair Lucifer 'combed' out.

"HAHA I don told you not to go to him! he snatched the shit outta ya head huh?"

"He aint have to do me like that..."

MAMMON

Now that's a black king right here

I'm tired of people saying the only things Mammon's good ar is eat hot chip and lie.

He's traumatized by Lucifer heavy handed ass so he started silk pressing his hair.

Was elated when he heard mc was looking hair product recommendations.

"Of course the GREAT MAMMON will help!"

He was scared the first time mc let him help. Like I said Lucifer put the fear of their father into him.

"Mams you can be a bit rougher."

After every pass-through of the comb he'd kiss the top of their head.

He a real one as he goes out and buys mc a bunch of bonnets and durags.

Mammon even goes out of the way to ask if Simeon and Diavolo want to join. cuz lord knows Simeon got them dead ends and Dia got that heat damage.

LEVITHAN

First mistake was going to Levi it was whole a struggle. When he came back to he was first date type nervous.

Got flashbacks to Lucifer when did their hair when he dry comb them lol.

"BOY!"

"🥺"

Instead of using the metal comb he used a blow out brush while it was on the highest setting. Mc almost killed him.

Purposely yanks mc hair just for them to yell at him, but stops when they threatened to go to someone else.

On the other note he be doing the hell out of mc's hair, like who's hair is he parting? Whomst edges do he be laying?

Always putting mc's hair into anime inspired looks from Sailor Moon to Goku

Also all the Ruri-chan hair clips he got mc, and he got a nose bleed when you wore the devil horn clips Asmo go for them as a joke.

Mc almost died when he called a bonnet a 'bedtime hat'

Then when he learned how to braid he had mc done in about 40 mins. I swear it's them gamer hands be hittin different.

SATAN

Like father like son, he always has something to say.

"All you need is water mc"

Then he stared reading up on the different types of hair and now he's around every corner telling them how to care for their OWN hair.

"I noticed you used hair oil this morning Mc. You know they only way your hair down."

"Hm.. you seem to be doing something wrong Mc your hair is prickly it should be soft."

So when it came to wash day everyone was busy except for Satan...

When they offhandedly asked he had the biggest grin of his face.

It was mostly mc doing the work with Satan nagging that they was doing it wrong.

"Here mc let me do it"

Then he tried to brush from their scalp and promptly broke the poor comb.

"It's obviously your hair! you need to keep up on brushing it out."

Mc was contemplated what type of sentence they'll get if they killed an avatar of sin

After the disastrous wash day Satan put his pride aside and went and asked Mammon on what he did wrong.

Yo his reaction when he learned that he was the wrong one.

So when the next wash day came.

"Your hair looks dry Mc I can tell you didn't oil your hair" boy why I outta-

He for some reason good at finger waves.

ASMODEUS

Many might think he was the best person to go to, he doesn't know squat. The only experience he has with curly hair is Mammon, and that's only when mammon needs help pressing it.

He never really seen anyone around the Devildom with curly hair but he's willing to learn.

He's made an extensive list on all the products they use so when the two go shopping they'll make a stop by the beauty supply store.

"But it's so expensive Asmo"

"Why not thought? Lady Bootiyay only restocks every 100 years!"

"Hm that you mention it"

Loves doing intricate hairstyles mostly for the devilgram

"Say cheese mc! #myhardwork #Washday"

Always sealing your stuff and blaming it on Beel, mc knows he's lying because they can smell their moroccan oil shampoo

Buys durags and bonnets of pictures only and will through a fit if he catches you wearing them for any other reason.

"Mc you're stressing me out! your hair is frizzy and we got plans"

BEELZEBUB

When he destroyed mc's wall during is pudding tantrum he ate all of their hair creams.

"WHO STOLE MY HAIR MAYO!?"

"...That wasn't for making sandwiches?

Mc has to hold themselves back when they catch him using their hair oils for atual cooking

Mc has to keep him infront of them at all times when he helps them wash their hair. why? as stated above.

Has come close to eating mc on occasion.

"But you smell so good!"

He loves getting them silk scarfs especially ones that match his hair color.

BELPHEGOR

"Why did I ask Belphie of all people" is the thought going through mc mind rn.

Thought he was trying to kill them again cause he fell asleep while holding their head under the faucet.

Mc asked him if he could put the hot comb on the stove for them and when they came to get it found him sleeping on the stove with the comb in his hand.

Mc has banned him from helping them cuz everytime he helps it always ends with them getting hurt.

He also a stealer of bonnets when it's mc turn to do the laundry they can normally find 5 ro 20 of their missing bonnets.

#obey me! #obey me brothers #obey me fluff #shall we date obey me #obey me #obey me scenarios #obey me headcanons #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me x reader #obey me x mc #📋🍭 #📋 #🍭

[make-a-little-mischief]

When I read this (obviously I know what it means) but the way it's worded I had an image in my mind of the two of them strolling into Central Park, baseballs in hand, stopping, taking a last look at one another before lofting the balls as far as they could and then just running away.

And apparently, since it says "often", this would be a regular activity for them - every Wednesday is "send a baseball careening into the park day".

I now present an utterly ridiculous CCH style scene I just came up with on the fly:

[Dean and Jerry's hotel, Jerry's room]

[This is their first visit to New York City]

D: "Hey Jer it's Wednesday, you know what that means?"

J: "You know I do! I got my running shoes on and I'm all stretched! Let's go throw some balls!"

D: "Hey Jer..."

J: "Yeah Dean?"

D: "Are you sure we've been doin' this right? The throwing the baseballs I mean?"

J: "Oh yeah of course I'm positive. That guy I bought the baseballs from said this is what a lot of New Yorkers do to let off steam and pass the time - he said they go to Central Park and throw a baseball."

D: "Yeah...but just throwing a ball into a park willy nilly, it has felt a bit strange..."

J: "Dean this is New York they do things special here. We are not to question their ways but only to blend in and become one of them..."

D: "Alright well just make sure you don't hit someone this time, aim at a tree or somethin'."

J: "Oh yeah I'll do that- OH! but Dean what if I aim at tree and hit a squirrel?!"

D: "Hit a squirrel? You're not gonna hit a squirrel. Come on Jer, do you wanna go do this or not?! We only have so much free time before the show."

J: "Yeah, yeah ok! But if I hit a squirrel I'm blaming you!"

D: "You're nutty you that?"

J: "Yeah...kinda like a squirrel. Cus you know they like nuts, and they also kind of move and run around like I do on stage - hey, maybe aiming at a tree isn't a bad idea cus if there's a squirrel there he'll know I mean him no harm because I'm basically one of them."

D: "I think you're basically right, pally. It's a wonder you haven't sprouted a bushy tail. C'mon."

J: "Hey Dean?"

D: "Yeah Jer?"

J: "Well what if I do hit a squirrel but it's not that first squirrel but it's a lady squirrel and what if they were togetha-"

D: "Oh, well, you know you'd be hittin' on that squirrel's gal, literally."

J: "Don't make jokes Dean! I'm serious!"

D: "You're serious? I'M serious - this whole conversation is a joke! I mean what are you talkin' about accidentally hitting a squirrel's girlfriend this is ridiculous-"

[Dean notices Jerry's face]

"What now?"

J: "Well Dean, you know actually they wouldn't be boyfriend and girlfriend, they'd be boyfriend and squirrelfriend. HAHA! SQUIRRELfriend you get it?! SQUIRREL and FRIEND togetha SQUIRRELFRIEND??!!"

*Jerry continues cracking up over his lame joke*

*Dean just watches in accepting bemusement, he shakes his head*

D: "The only one around here with a squirrel for a friend is me. C'mon Jer."

[Dean ushers a still laughing Jerry out the door]

END SCENE.

This is how my brain works, let's face it.

#jerry lewis #dean martin #martin and lewis #bubbies #bubbies for life #i love my bubbies #jerry has squirrel energy #this is one of the stupidest things i have ever written and i love it #putting my theatre degree to good use

[beelspillowpet]

TMI and NSFW, I've had such a high sexdrive recently it's not even funny, and coupled with a certain dream last night,,, I'm suffering, like, a lot,,,

Like in the dream, I was basically being passed around the demon brothers and got all shy in the beginning stating that I'm a virgin while somebody's hard on was pressing against my clit and I can remember Lucifer saying was how pathetic I was, letting myself be used by such awful creatures and getting off on it, even if I denied doing so. I think Levi had his tail around my chest, ripping off my shirt, and Satan was restraining my hands while Beel and Asmo ate me out and,,, I'm w*t just thinking about it again, I've probably gotten off three times to it today already

Okay but listen being passed around is definitely,,,,,,,,, shamefully,,,,,,, my thing,,,? Like it’s not poly to me but a gangbang do be hittin tho. Not sure if I’m masc or not today but you’re fem so we’re rolling with it!!!

-

Cornered. By seven demons, you were cornered. Mammon had found your journal describing in detail what you liked about each of them. What you wanted each of them to do with you. How did he find it? Snooping through your stuff of course! You’re part of the house now, so that means you also have to deal with the same things everyone else does!

Unfortunately, for you, however, these boys had no sense of privacy. At least when it came to you.

Your back literally against the wall, you watch them encroach on your personal space. They knew you were a virgin, and this wasn’t really ideal. Virgins don’t make for great sex partners, but they do make for trophies. They would enjoy their trophy well.

The first to get their hands on you was Mammon, unsurprisingly. With speed matched by none but Lucifer, he was quick to pounce on what was his. He was your first man in everything else, he was going to be your first man for real now. His cock pressed against your clit, massaging the little swollen bead. He’ll be gentle, babe. He promises. He just wants to soak up all of that wetness first, look at you. Already so hot and bothered just because demons are taking advantage of you. But you love them all, right? You won’t tell them no.

He massaged his glands across your entrance before slowly slipping in. He made sure to capture your lips before any of the others could. They scrambled to grab whatever they could, effectively crowding your vision. Two of them already had your hands working on their cocks, while another had your foot. Part of you assumed it was Leviathan, but would not be shocked to see if it was another. The only one you didn’t see was Lucifer.

You could barely make him out past Mammon’s hair, but there he was. Smirking devilishly at you. He mouthed something and the boys all halted for a moment, pulled back and chuckled.

“Look at how pathetic you are. Surrounded by demons wanting to fuck you, and getting off on it. A human girl, wet at the mere thought. They didn’t even have to tease you much.”

Mammon hisses through his teeth. You were clamping down on him- not only because of the new sensation of being full with him, but because Lucifer’s words only severed to get you off more.

It took a generous amount of time, but it’s the weekend. No one had responsibilities in the morning. None that would matter compared to right now.

You’d managed to take Mammon, Belphie, Beel, and Leviathan. You were knocking the list out, but your exhaustion was apparent. You would need a break soon.

Lucifer, as some point, was seated behind you, gently pulling you up to lay against him while Satan rutted against you in a frenzy. Sloppy wet sounds came from between your legs— a single rule was to not cum inside and yet Belphie ignored it. While a bit angry that Belphie couldn’t even be bothered to pull out first, it ignited a fire in everyone in the room as they watched you hobble to your feet, crouch a bit, and let the cum slowly ooze out. You had collapsed on Lucifer then, you think.

Speaking of the first born, he was gently brushing your hair from your face. Whispering words of encouragement. You take demon cock so well. What a pretty little human. It’s as if you were bred to take it, and love it all the same. You couldn’t wait for them to overwhelm you, and pass you around like a personal cum dump. And oh, they would take good care of you. Their personal little fuck toy. Beautiful fuck toy. Good girl. Such a good girl.

The praise in your ear was too much. You were starting to cum again and that brought Satan over the edge as well. He figured Belphie already came inside, it wouldn’t hurt if he did as well. So he did. For the second time that day, you were filled up with cum. Only for the others to watch it slowly ooze out of your pussy. Not ashamed to pleasure you in another way, Asmo stuck his fingers inside and slowly rubbed at your walls. He pulled cum out of you while making sure it wasn’t too much for you. You poor sensitive thing.

He absolutely adored how soaked you were. His fingers would come out pruney if he kept them in too long. But that’s okay. It was about you today, darling. He would happily sacrifice a bit of his time, a bit of himself, just to please his beloved.

Once he was certain he’d gotten enough out of you, Lucifer had called for a break. You looked as if you were going to pass out if Asmo got his hands on you. Or even Beel. Care was just as important as pleasure, and they made certain of it. A bit pouty they haven’t had their turn yet, but they would soon. Lucifer just hoped you would be able to take him in the end. He would not be merciful on you, human.

#fem! mc #female mc #afab mc #obey me #om! #<3 #obey me beelzebub #obey me shall we date #obey me swd #obey me mammon #obey me lucifer #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me belphgor #obey me asmoedus #stfu jinx #anon

[thoustve]

a self indulgent animation meme i decided to do... doesn’t have everything i wanted to add to it and it’s a bit more looped than i would’ve liked, BUT i think this is as far as my motivation/inspiration for it would allow, haha.

#garden talks. #pastry #my art #my animation #animation meme #anyway this took a few weeks to fully finish if only because work is hell and i did Not have inspiration most days #but i got out what i could and i'm happy enough with the end result!! #and i mean it was to indulge some feelins that were particularly hittin me when the idea came into my head so #idrc if it's looped or anything #im just happy to have gotten it out lol #even if said feelins are calmer/quieter now #still there but!! they chillin