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livinginshambles · 6 months

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No, you listen to me | James Potter

Pairing: James Potter x Slytherin!Fem!Reader

Word Count: 3.6k

Summary: Aftermath of when you ran away from the Yule ball, cinderella style. after the Christmas holidays, both of you return to hogwarts with different objectives. James tries to find out who you are. You try to make sure he never will.

Notes: Not proofread. Mistakes. Once again because people keep forgetting, english is my third language, be kind. Themes of bullying, discrimination, very bad sister relationships. Regulus is like a BROTHER. James tries?

Masterlist Part one. Part three

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Your eyes scanned across the parchment, rereading James’ apology, but all you could really feel was disappointment and anger. What was even the point of trying to prove anyone wrong? You leaned back against the cushions of the armchair and pulled your knees up, wrapping your arms around them to steadily lock them in place. Then you let your head drop.

You pressed your watering eyes into your knee, effectively letting your pajama pants soak up any tears that threatened to fall. You gently rocked yourself back and forth while you tried to clear your mind. You wouldn’t let any of this get to you.

A hand pressed itself to your back, right between your shoulder blades. “Let’s get you out of here,” Regulus spoke up. His tone was hard, but only because of his clenched jaw when he thought back to how you had run off with a betrayed look. The second he realized it was James who was the mystery guy, he had kept a close eye. He knew things wouldn’t end well with those prejudiced twats, and he was right.

You pathetically looked up at him, and Regulus didn’t bother to hide his grimace at the sight of your face.

“Don’t exaggerate you arse,” you mumbled and shoved him light-heartedly.

“Back at you,” Regulus shot back. Then he sighed and motioned for you to scootch over so he could squeeze himself to fit in the armchair with you. “I know you. And I know you know what my brother and his friends are like. Why are you so disappointed?”

You stared at the lit fireplace, lost in thoughts, and eventually shrugged when Regulus nudged you out of your train of thoughts.

“I guess- I really liked the guy on the other side of the paper. And I really hoped that maybe he’d be in there somewhere. And I suppose that for a moment I actually thought James Potter was alright, you know?”

Regulus scrunched his nose in distaste. “Not at all, but go on.”

You shook your head in amusement at him, but let your eyes soften. “I’m sorry Reg,” you whispered.

“What for?”

“Making you listen to me whining about a guy that I know you have personal issues with.” You decided not to mention out loud the fact that those personal issues included the way Sirius had left Regulus behind in that household, escaping to live with the Potters and going as far as publicly calling James his true brother. Found family, he had proudly said.

Regulus knew what you were referring to. He smiled bitterly. “Well, brothers are overrated anyways. I’d much rather have a sister,” he said while nudging you again.

You hummed in contemplation. “I don’t know Reg; I’ll have to disagree with you on this one. I’d much rather have a brother than any number of sisters.”

“How convenient for us.”

“Very convenient indeed,” you smiled happily.

Regulus got up suddenly and turned to you with a stretched out hand. You raised an eyebrow at him.

“I meant what I said, you know. Let’s get you out of here. I do recall you promising me tea at your new apartment.” He looked at his pocket watch. “Well, it’s 5 o’clock in the morning, and the first train leaves at 6. What’s the difference between leaving in the evening or right now.”

“You absolute champ.”

“I don’t even know what that means.”

You laugh whole-heartedly and stuff the parchment in your transfigurations book. You and Regulus took the first train and left Hogwarts behind for the Christmas holidays. A break would do you good. Godric knows you needed to get James off your mind.

James carefully placed the glass slippers in his suitcase and covered them with a few sweaters just in case. He had caught the elves recklessly throwing suitcases into the storage compartment of the Hogwarts express before. You’d think that the use of magic would come in handy for tasks like this, but no.

“Prongs, I got you this?” Sirius pushed a sheet of bubble wrap into James’ arms. James offered Sirius an appreciative look.

After thoroughly explaining everything, from the moment when he found the parchment, to who you were and why he decided that he wanted to become someone you would approve of, Sirius had pieced the rest together and apologized to James for leaving such a shit impression on his mystery date.

James sheepishly pointed at his own solution. “Should I change it?”

“Well, I mean did you see how the elves throw around with our luggage?”

James mirrored Sirius' grin. This break truly came at a perfect time. After all, James would let you occupy his mind as much as he needed to find out who you were.

Two weeks flew by in a blur. You and Regulus had set up a Christmas tree inside your small apartment and had made a competition out of finding the most impressive gift for each other, with only 10 galleons.

You had found the most gorgeous black quill and enchanted ink set for him and were rather confident until Regulus had somehow shown up with what looked like emerald, antique and gorgeously over the top earrings. You had shot him a look and he had immediately provided a receipt to prove he had played fair.

“I just have great negotiating skills,” he’d said.

You had hummed skeptically in reply but had happily tried them on.

All in all, the holidays were a very welcome break for you. Which is why you were so very reluctant to pack your bags. The door to your room opened and Regulus stood in the entrance, leaning against the door frame.

“Get out,” you groaned in dismay at the interruption. Regulus shot you an unimpressed look.

“Not until I see you pack; we leave in less than an hour.”

You huffed in annoyance and threw a pillow at his head. “I’m not asking you again, Black.” You flopped back down on your bed dramatically in dismay at the prospect of going back to Hogwarts. Regulus elegantly tilted his head and let the pillow fly past him.

“One hour,” he enunciated, before walking off.

You threw another pillow his way and yelled, “Close the door when you leave, you twat!”

With a flick of his wand, your door closed.

Regulus waited for you with a bag in his hand.

“Where’s the rest of it,” you teased as you motioned to the small amount of luggage he held.

Regulus turned red but stuck his chin up. “Left them here for the summer,” he off-handedly replied. You laughed. “Great, so you can help carry this bag then,” you grinned and pushed your smaller bag into his hands while you marched out the door with your heavy luggage, dragged behind you.

When you entered the platform, and were handed the Hogwarts newspaper, you did not expect to find a picture of you and James at the Yule ball on the front page. ‘Who are you, Willow?’

You immediately folded the paper together and looked up in panic at Regulus. He looked around and found different students excitedly chittering to each other, all while pointing at the newspaper.

“That is so romantic,”

“I thought James was with Lily?”

“No, they’re just friends now.”

“I was wondering who he was dancing with.”

“She looks so pretty.”

“If I found out that my date was James Potter, I’d take off that mask immediately.”

“Well, she could just be shy.”

“So true, probably Hufflepuff, don’t you think?

“I really hope he finds her.”

You grimaced at everyone and all you wanted to do was disappear. “Relax, Y/N,” Regulus smoothly pulled you on board the Hogwarts Express. “No one will know it’s you.”

Despite knowing that he was absolutely right, you still faced the floor as you looked for an empty compartment. You didn’t realize that you were passing James, who had just come back from a train meeting with the other prefects. He had picked up on Regulus’ words and frowned. But before he could really stop to consider Regulus’ statement, Peter happily waved at him from the marauders’ compartment. “We’re over here!” he called out. James forgot about what he heard.

Remus held the newspaper up in the air when James finally took a seat. “Really?”

“It was Pad’s idea,” James immediately said.

Peter curiously grabbed the newspaper. “Any results?”

James shrugged. “It’s only the first day,” he tries to convince himself, but he was not very sure about this approach to find you.

“It’s going to work out, trust me,” Sirius said. “When she sees that you’re going to this extent to find her, you’ll definitely woo her for sure,” he claimed.

Remus pulled a face. “I mean, if she ran off cause you two were being pricks, again,” he gave both Sirius and James a sharp look. “And hasn’t answered any of your messages, I don’t think starting a witch-hunt of sorts is the way to find her,” he voiced out his opinion. ”She clearly doesn’t want to be found.”

“What are you calling my methods bad?” Sirius squinted his eyes at Remus in mock offense.

“I’m just saying they wouldn’t exactly woo me,” Remus dryly remarked.

“And yet-“

“Guys,” James interrupted. “I just want to find her and apologize. And ask her for another chance to prove that I’m more than what she saw.”

“Well,” Peter started. He turned red when all eyes were suddenly on him. “She will probably not reveal herself. But she’s still a student here. And she knows who you are. So maybe if you publicly show off kind acts, she’ll see how you can be?”

There was a beat of silence and for a moment, Peter wanted to change into a rat and crawl into a hole to hide. But suddenly he was patted on the back by James. “Peter, you absolute champ!”

James Potter was acting weird, and you knew exactly what he was trying to do. You huffed to yourself as you marched right past him while he held the door open for his friends and you, who trailed in right behind them.

Previously, James would have definitely let the door fall in your face, and you had anticipated so, thus smoothly switching your books to your left arm, putting your right hand in front of you in a bracing manner. And so it happened that you stood there frozen, hand flat against James' chest, because he had turned around fully to hold the door open for you.

You embarrassedly dropped your hand that still lingered against him, and a deep frown settled on your face.

“I’d take ten points from Slytherin for touching a student without their consent, but I suppose I’ll let it slide for today,” he arrogantly said. You wanted to beat him up. But you supposed you could let it slide for today. You scowled at him and fled past him towards your designated seat.

Something tugged inside James’ chest as he watched you turn your back towards him and hurry away. He walked to join the rest of the marauders, a ghost feeling of your palm against his chest.

It hadn’t just been you that he was more civilized with. You noticed when you found him volunteering in the library, putting away books back on the shelves manually. This bothered you, because he tended to specifically linger around the particular section in the back about Egyptian rites, your favorite. You knew he was there to hopefully spot any often-returning students.

You also noticed that less and less students were coming back to the common room, hexed. Aside from snide remarks, you hadn’t encountered much animosity from him anymore either.

Instead, you found yourself on assigned patrol with him, despite the fact that Regulus had kindly offered to jinx his broom during Quidditch practice so you wouldn’t have to.

“So,” James broke the silence. “How was your holiday?”

“Why do you want to know,” you immediately shot back before you could stop yourself. James raised his hands in surrender. “Woah, sorry, L/N, just making conversation here.”

You sighed and forced your shoulders to lose their tension. “It was fine.”

“Fine.” James repeated.

“Fine,” you confirmed.

That was the end of your conversation, in your opinion. James however, seemed to think differently.

“So did you get any nice presents?”

You shot him an annoyed look but ended up answering anyway. “Yes actually, Regulus got me these earrings,” you said, and you tilted your head to show him. James’ eyes lingered on your earrings. They looked good on you. The exaggerated gem made you stand out despite your sober attire.

“What else?”

“What do you mean, what else?”

“Why, did your parents not buy you anything or what?”

You halted mid-step and stared up at James. He noticed that he had said something wrong, and when your sisters came to mind, he hurriedly tried to take his words back. You didn’t let him.

“I don’t go home for the holidays,” you settled on. “I’m not particularly welcome there. My parents are as big of a fan of me, as Alyssa and Marla are.” You laughed bitterly and continued walking. James followed behind you, he didn’t say a word, instead waited for you to continue.

“Well, I’m in Slytherin after all. Which obviously equals being an evil blood supremacist. They wouldn’t want to associate themselves with that, of course,” you sarcastically remarked.

James felt guilt slowly seep in. Your words resonated in his mind and his hands grasped the folded parchment in the pocket of his robes tightly. Those were his exact same words of that night at the Yule ball, and he bit his lip. “I’m sorry.”

You looked up at him, surprise evident in your eyes. “You’re sorry?” You asked him in disbelief.

James nodded. If he couldn’t say it to his mystery girl, at least he could say it to you, he figured.

James watched your eyes light up slightly and for a moment, he was lost in a trance. He snapped out of it when you returned the question. “So how was your holiday?”

He grinned at the olive branch that you were reaching out. “Mine was fine.”

“Fine?”

“Fine,” he teased. You fought the smile that threatened to tug on your lips.

Patrol ended without any incidents to report and when you wrote that down, James peered over your shoulder to catch your circled dot on the ‘i’ of “nothing to report.” A sense of déjà vu dawned on him, but the sheer unconscious refusal to even consider you a possibility kept your secret safe.

When you were in bed that night, you couldn’t help but think about how at ease you had felt for the remainder of the night with James, basking in the familiarity of the person behind the paper.

With every patrol, you two put another step forward in the direction of a friendship of some sorts.

James couldn't deny the fact that with each time, he started to look forward to the next time, almost the same giddy feeling fluttering in his stomach as each time he would unfold his parchment to find new kind words written there.

You and Willow would be friends, James thought, as he looked at you while you were casually explaining Transfiguration to him while you two strolled through the corridors, not without the occasional insult at his 'lack of competence'.

But for now, James enjoyed the privilege of calling you by your first name. A friend of some sorts, he liked to think.

Perhaps he was wrong about Slytherins. Sure, there were some rotten apples, but he supposed there were rotten apples in each house. And you weren't so bad after all.

For the first time in a long time, you enjoyed your days at Hogwarts. Truly enjoyed them. You would send Regulus to the library to get you your favourite books, and would patrol every Thursday with James unless he had Quidditch practice. Then you would patrol with Abrams. You’d come across James, who would nod with a kind smile at you as you two have come to be cautious friends and patrol-partners. You hadn’t really heard anything from your sisters either, which was absolute bliss as well.

But then one day, you were studying Transfiguration by yourself in the library, and you just so happened to need to go to the bathroom. When you returned, you noticed your book was missing and you pulled a sour face before requesting a new one from Professor McGonagall who had looked over her glasses at you.

But that hadn’t been the bad part. No, the bad part was that you had completely forgotten that you had put your enchanted parchment that connected yours to James’ inside that book.

Sirius had victoriously grinned at his funny prank idea. He would change some spells in your book so that you would mess up and become a toad in class. He tossed the book on a table in the common room and a piece of paper slid out.

Sirius had seen the piece of paper before, and his eyes grew as wide as saucers. He jumped up, ran towards his room, and rummaged through James’ nightstand before finding James' parchment under his pillow and wrote something on it. He walked back down the stairs with James’ paper, and he watched in disbelief as a messy ‘hello’ appeared on the paper that your sisters now held. “Merlin,” he breathed out, but your sisters had already stormed out of the room.

You entered the Great Hall and felt everyone staring at you and whispering. Even fellow Slytherin students looked at you in contempt. You gave Regulus a confused look when you walked to the free seat next to him. He quietly slid over the Hogwarts newspaper.

Front page again. ‘Mystery girl uncovered. Not a Willow, but a Hanging Tree.”

You didn’t need to read the rest; you tore your eyes away from the paper. Tears threatened to spill, but you tried to keep a cool front. You turned around to look for James and found him and his friends sitting right behind you.

Whoever thought that putting The Gryffindor table and Slytherin table next to each other should rot in the dungeons, you bitterly thought.

It was your sister who spoke up first. “I can’t believe someone like you would make themselves out to be a victim. ‘Oh no, my sisters bully me,’” she mocked you.

You felt heat rise to your cheeks and got up. She got up as well and you stood eye to eye with each other. “You’re pathetic,” She sneered. “You’re the real mistake here. So go do what you do best- run away.”

You wanted to say something. Anything. But you felt weak and small again. So you turned around and walked away. Whispers continued to fill the room as everyone seemed to have something to say about you.

“How embarrassing.”

“She should be ashamed”

“A Slytherin like her?”

“She definitely wasted James’ time.”

With every comment you heard, you bit harder on the inside of your cheek, and when that last comment dropped, you balled your fists. Why should you be the one to walk away?

You turned around furiously and marched back towards James, who had gotten up to follow you and reached out his hand. You recoiled.

“Y/N, listen-“

“No, you listen to me,” you spat at him. You looked him up and down with a pained look, holding back tears of frustration and while trying to convey as much disgust as you could.

“If you didn’t like what you found out, you could’ve kept it to yourself and thrown the damn paper away. You had no right to publicly try to humiliate me like this. All of your kindness in an attempt to be a good person only shows how wretched you really are when you stop pretending and act cruelly true to yourself.”

James' eyes flashed with hurt and he shook his head, words were stuck in his throat. He wanted to cover his ears; he didn’t want to hear you say this to him. This isn’t what he wanted at all. You were wrong. He didn’t even know it was you until he saw the newspaper this morning.

But you weren’t finished talking yet.

“Has it ever even occurred to any of you,” you looked at the people behind him. You stared your sisters dead in the eye. “That maybe your prejudice and thoughtless assumptions and insults about how awful or evil we Slytherins are, is the very thing that pushes us down that path?”

You turned your attention back to James, who had an unreadable expression on his face now. “Your cruel comments are part of the reason and you, James Potter, are especially cruel.”

Your tone was sharp, face hardened and the entire Great Hall had fallen silent. Not even the professors spoke up. James felt like you had hit him in the face, and you might as well have. He looked down in shame at your words.

You shakily let out your breath and lowered your voice again. This time, you sounded tired. Reality seemed to dawn upon you that everyone in the great hall was listening to you, and you shook your head to yourself, taking a step back. You scoffed softly.

“I suppose you are truly worthy of the Gryffindor name; overly proud and arrogant in the name of bravery with a tendency to prove yourself, disregarding others and their feelings.” Your venomous words cut through James' heart.

James watched you walk away again and everything around him seemed to fade. He was losing you again. How had he not seen this?

Your situation with your sisters. The way you ran away at the Yule ball when he made a crude remark about Slytherins. The sense of déjà vu every time you walked past him, back turned towards him. Your handwriting. The feeling of your hand pressed to his chest just as when you two danced. The way you were great at transfiguration and could have easily transfigured those glass slippers. The way Regulus was the only student to frequently visit your favourite book section in the library. The chills you had sent down his back when you had allowed him to call you by your first name, and in return had called him James.

‘I’m in Slytherin after all. Which obviously equals being an evil blood supremacist.’

‘No one will know it’s you.’

Everyone knows.

Preview if interested

Part three

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leaderwonim · 2 months

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MR. FUCKING BRIGHTSIDE

pairing. slytherin!jake x hufflepuff!fem!reader

summary. although sim jaeyun constantly surrounds himself with douchebags and looks like he could stomp all over a girl’s heart; you knew the real him that was deep inside. but did you really?

genre. hogwarts!au, ANGST, bits of fluff, right person wrong circumstances, forbidden/secret love

warnings. jake can be a bit of an asshole, the insult “mudblood” is used, slytherin gets shitted on as a house (dw, i’m a slytherin 😭)

Sim Jaeyun, or everybody knew him as Jake, the sixth year Slytherin, seeker of his house’s Quidditch team, and nevertheless, charming to every girl that has stepped foot in his proximity.

Half of your friends would disagree—that he was not charming but rather just another slithering snake in the worst possible house at Hogwarts.

Jake’s friend group consisted of three people: Draco Malfoy, Blaise, and Pansy Parkinson. They just so happen to be an insufferable lot, maybe except Blaise who minded his own business half of the time.

“Today you will be working in pairs.” Professor McGonagall states, fixing her glasses as she holds a stroll of paper. “I’ve already decided them, absolutely no changes.”

There’s groans that fill the room, one of whom you recognize as no other than Jake.

“Seriously? I wanted to pair up with Blaise!” He whines, earning a glare from Draco. “What? C’mon Dray, we both know you and I don’t get anything done.”

“Alright,” Professor McGonagall clears her throat. “Blaise Zabini with Nancy Drumswell, Aidan Callaghan with Hermione Granger, Harry Potter with Neville Longbottom, Draco Malfoy with Pansy Parkinson, and finally, Jaeyun Sim with Y/N L/N.”

You don’t blink when you realize who your partner is. Rather, you just sigh a bit in defeat, coming to the conclusion that you cannot do anything to convince McGonagall to change partners.

“Hey.” Jake plops himself down on the seat next to you, laughing as Draco gives him a shove on the way to his own table.

“Hi.” You murmur, suddenly finding your yellow robe more interesting than him.

“I’ve never been paired with a Hufflepuff before.” He grins, the shit eating grin that weirdly captives your senses. “Are you guys as nice as you claim to be?”

“I don’t know Jaeyun, you tell me.”

Jake’s eyes widen before he lets out a giggle. “Jaeyun? No one ever calls me that anymore.”

You shrug, sliding him the piece of paper with the instructions to your project. “You can stop by the Hufflepuff dormitories at 8, I’ll be done with dinner by then and I’ll open it for you.”

“Sounds like a plan sweetheart.”

You cringe at his words, the obvious disdain on your face makes him laugh even harder.

“I’ll see you then.” He whispers, and just like a movie, stands up as soon as McGonagall dismisses the class, merging into one with his friends.

♡;

Just as the clock struck eight, you heard a knock. Your books, pens, and parchment were spread out in front of you, eagerly waiting to be used.

As you slowly get up to open the door, you’re met face to face with Jake, who entered the room with a confident stride

"Hey there, Y/N," Jake greeted, flashing you a charming smile as he took a seat across from your side of the table.

"Hey," you politely turn his smile. "Ready to tackle this project?"

"Absolutely," he affirmed, pulling out his own notes and spreading them out on the table. "I've got some ideas already. How about you?"

You nodded, slightly impressed by Jake's readiness to dive into the work. "I've been brainstorming as well. Maybe we can combine our ideas and come up with something great."

As the two of you began discussing your approaches to the project, youcouldn't help but notice how articulate and intelligent Jake was when he wasn't surrounded by his usual group of friends. His confidence shone through, but it was paired with a genuine interest in the subject matter that caught you off guard.

"You sure sound different when you’re not around Draco," You remarked.

Jake only chuckled, a hint of self-deprecation in his voice. "Yeah, well, I guess I don't always show this side of me around my friends. They have a different idea of what's cool."

You can only nod in understanding, realizing that Jake was more complex than you had initially assumed.

As you continued working, you couldn’t help but find yourself paying closer attention to the small details about him—the way his brow furrowed in concentration, the soft lilt in his voice when he explained a concept, the way his eyes sparkled with passion for the project.

"Thanks for coming, Jake," you say, offering him a genuine smile. "I really enjoyed working with you."

Jake returned your smile, his eyes meeting yours with a warmth that sent a sudden flutter through your heart. "Anytime, Y/N. I had a great time too."

As you bid each other goodnight, you couldn’t help but suddenly miss his presence, something you didn’t expect to happen with just one session with him.

♡;

In your second studying session, you and Jake found yourselves engrossed in their project once again. This time, you two decided to move to a quiet corner of the library, away from prying eyes and distractions. The Hufflepuff dorms were too crowded, and you knew you’d rather die than step into the Slytherin dormitory as a Hufflepuff.

As you discussed your research findings, you couldn't help but notice how Jake's demeanor had softened since your last meeting. He seemed more relaxed, more open, as if he felt comfortable letting his guard down around you.

Jake suddenly reached across the table to grab a book, his hand brushing against yours in the process. It was a simple gesture, but it sent a jolt of electricity coursing through your veins, leaving you quite literally breathless for a moment. “Here Y/N, I heard this book was good for this particular topic.”

Your eyes met briefly, and you felt your cheeks flush with warmth.

“Thanks,” you murmur, looking down slightly.

Jake smiled back at you, seemingly oblivious to the effect his touch had on you. For a person who charms so much girls, you’d think he know how much his advances affected others.

“No problem, seems like we got a lot done within these 2 days huh?”

"Yeah, it seems so," you reply softly.

Even though it had only been 2 nights, in those quiet moments, away from the prying eyes of their classmates, you had realized just how much you actually enjoyed Jake's company. He wasn't just the annoying Slytherin she had initially pegged him to be—he was kind, intelligent, and surprisingly easy to talk to.

"I guess that's it for tonight," Jake said, a hint of disappointment in his voice. “Can’t believe they only allow Prefects in the library past ten.”

"Yeah," you groan, feeling a pang of sadness at the thought of saying goodbye. "But we'll see each other again soon, right?"

Jake nodded, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Definitely. Let’s just hope Malfoy doesn’t ruin it.”

♡;

As you made your way through the corridors of Hogwarts with Hermione, you spotted Jake surrounded by his Slytherin friends, including Draco and Pansy. Suddenly feeling the wave of confidence at the sight of him, you decided to muster up the courage to approach him.

But as you drew nearer, you noticed a subtle shift in Jake's demeanor. His usual friendly expression hardened, and a smirk spread across his lips as he turned to face you and Hermione.

"Look who it is, boys," Draco says, voice dripping with sarcasm. "Little Miss Hufflepuff herself."

Jake and Pansy chuckled, exchanging knowing glances with Draco as if they were in on some inside joke. Your smile faltered, confusion and hurt swirling in your chest as you struggled to make sense of Jake's sudden change in attitude.

"Um, hi, Jaeyun," you replied, voice barely above a whisper as you fought to keep her composure.

"Seriously? Jaeyun? That’s hysterical.” Pansy laughs, as if it was the funniest thing in the world.

“What's the matter, Y/N? Can't find anyone from your own house so you bother our Jake here?” Draco continues to taunt you, his words like daggers aimed straight at your heart. “Or should I say Jaeyun?”

You felt your cheeks burn with embarrassment as the laughter of Jake's friends echoed in your ears. You had never felt so small, so insignificant to the group in front of you.

“I was hoping to discuss our project.” You say quietly, looking at anyone but Jake.

Hermione could sense your hostility, pulling you close to her side as she gave Draco a snarl.

“Listen Y/N,” Jake says, “all that crap you Hufflepuffs preach about loving each other and expressing feelings is a lie. No one really cares about what you have to say.”

“Alright, that’s enough!” Hermione says, shielding you by putting herself in front of your frame. “What has gotten into you?”

But Jake just shrugged her off, his smirk widening into a sneer. "Mind your own business, mudblood. This doesn't concern you."

Feeling the sting of tears threatening to spill from your eyes, you quickly turn on your heel and fled down the corridor, desperate to escape the humiliation of Jake's cruel words.

Had you really been so stupid to place your trust in Sim Jaeyun knowing full well his reputation? By the looks of it, all answers pointed to yes.

♡;

By 7pm, the sun had dipped below the horizon, casting a warm glow across the surface of the Black Lake just in front of the Slytherin Common Rooms.

“Y/N?” Almost as if he knew exactly where you were, Jake shows up in front of you, making you give him a glare.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N," he murmured, his voice tinged with remorse as he avoided your gaze. He takes a seat next to you on the grass, his fingers tracing patterns across them in nervousness. "I messed up back there. I let my pride get the best of me, and I hurt you in the process. I should have stood up for you."

You sighed, your heart heavy with disappointment but softened by Jake's sincerity.

“I don’t get it,” you say. “One moment you’re all kind and sincere around me, and the next, you say all these things like I’m worth nothing.”

The two of you sat in silence for a moment, the air filled with the gentle rustle of leaves and the distant calls of birds. Then, Jake spoke again, his voice hesitant but earnest. "I guess my friends just have an influence on me that I can’t control. I’m sorry for what I said earlier, you’re one of the kindest people I've ever met, Y/N. I admire that about you."

You slightly smiled, a warm flush spreading across your cheeks. "Thank you, Jake. That means a lot to me."

As the sky darkened and stars began to twinkle overhead, the two of you continued to talk, laughter mingling with the night air.

♡;

The next night was one of the more important nights at Hogwarts. Everybody had finished their exams—and the Ravenclaws decided to throw a party at their Commons.

The music throbbed as you entered with Ron Weasley, who, at the sight of his twin brothers, ran towards them. You roll your eyes at his behavior, and start pulsing through the crowded room, a plastic smile plastered on your face.

You notice Jake in the corner, sipping on what looked like a bottle of beer. He exchanged nods and greetings with those around him, his eyes scanning the room for something—someone.

But before you could gawk at him any longer, Draco cut in smoothly, his tone laced with mockery. "Oh, look who decided to show up. Did you bring your Hufflepuff friend to the party, Jake? How charming."

Pansy giggled, her eyes glittering with malice as she looked at you up and down. "I didn't know us Slytherins were into charity work."

“Guys, seriously? Cut it out,” Jake gulps, eyes directly meeting yours.

“He’s right,” Blaise says, and you swear it’s the most you’ve ever heard out of him. “Don’t ruin the party.”

“Whatever.” Pansy throws her hand in mock surrender. “Wouldn’t want to make the Hufflepuff cry.”

Hermione comes to your rescue right after Pansy throws you a glare.

“Piss off.” She says, interlocking her arms with yours.

“Thanks ‘Mione.” You thank her softly as you’re lead away from the lot. “For saving me back there.”

“Always,” she smiles. “Now cmon, I heard Ron’s already drunk!”

You two giggle at that, you letting Hermione lead the way into the crowd of people.

♡;

It’s about 2 hours later and the Ravenclaw party is still loud as ever, filled with with laughter and music.

Despite the Weasley twins making a full ruckus of themselves, your eyes were drawn to a figure slumped in a corner. It was Jake, only this time, he looked uncharacteristically vulnerable, his face pale and contorted with some type of emotion you hadn’t seen before.

Concern etched onto your features, and your body felt itself navigating through the crowd of people until you’re knelt beside him. "Jake? Are you alright? Where’s Draco?”

He lifted his head, and you swore you felt your heart clenched at the sight of his glassy eyes and trembling lips. "I'm fine," he mumbled, but his voice betrayed the lie.

"No, you're not," you reply softly, placing a hand on his shoulder. "What's wrong?"

Jake swallowed hard, his gaze flickering with a mix of emotions. "It's... it's nothing," he slurred, but his words lacked conviction.

You stayed silent, sensing he needed to unburden himself. After a moment, he spoke again, his voice raw with emotion. "Do you think I’m good for nothing?”

"What?" You asked gently, your heart sinking as you watched him struggle to form his thoughts.

"I mean look at this, look at me," Jake gestured vaguely, gesturing to the party around the two of you. "This charade I constantly put on. Pretending to be someone I'm not."

Your brows furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"I mean..." Jake trailed off, his breath hitching. "Was it all worth the six years of be pretending to be who I wasn’t? Pretending to be the egoistic charming Slytherin everyone claims to know so well?”

Jake pauses before looking up at you, his eyes swimming with unshed tears. "You know I care about you a lot, right? I like you, a lot.”

“You do?” You say quietly, brushing a few loose strands of hair out of his eyes.

“But we just can’t.”

“What?”

“Why not?”

"Because,” Jake's voice cracked, and he looked away. "Because I wish you were in Slytherin."

You felt your heart shatter into a million pieces at his words. You almost knew it then, with a painful realization that you could never compete with the loyalty he felt towards his house and the expectations placed upon him by his housemates.

Tears stung your eyes as you realized there was nothing she could do to change his mind. With a heavy heart, you rose to your feet.

“Well I’m sorry then, Jake.” You say, turning around so he wouldn’t see your tears.

And as you walked away, the echoes of his confession lingered in your mind, haunting your thoughts with the bitter realization that sometimes, love simply wasn't enough.

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slashingdisneypasta · 1 year

Text

Kung Fu Panda Villains x Reader || Drabbles

Plot / Includes: The common theme is tea XD

General Kai x Immortal!Reader: After coming back to the living plain as a spirit warrior, Kai’s first stop is to find you, an immortal ex-lover. Will you be happy to see him, though??

Lord Shen x ChildhoodFriend!Reader: You make Shen some tea because he’s always so uptight, and you crave a nice moment with him ^^

Tai Lung x Reader: The first thing Tai Lung does after escaping prison is visit you, his girlfriend/boyfriend/romantic partner from before he was imprisoned- and you’ve been waiting for him ^^

Annnnd, this is my first attempt at writing any of these guys, so I’m sorry if they aren’t quite right!

Warnings: I guess Tai gets a little frisky with you? But not really XD He’s just happy to see you!! XD

General Kai:

… A spirit warrior. This man leaves you for war, starts stealing peoples chi, doesn’t come back for 5 hundred years- and when he finally does come back, he is something called a spirit warrior??

You are deeply unamused. And he knows it- how could he not? You are standing in your doorway looking up at him with a scowl on your lips. He better be intimidated.

“So… “Your voice is as cold as ice, eyes narrowing in distaste as he rubs the back of neck in nervousness at your reaction to him after all these years. Not because he is nervous, but because he has the good sense to look it. “how did it go??”

“Wh- uh… the war??”

“Yes.”

“Well, I um… Oogway banished me to the spirit realm… “

“I heard… “

“Oh, you know. So- uh- you know, that’s why I haven’t been around… not that I didn’t wanna see you, or forgot you or, or anything… “

“Uhuh… “

“Look, can I come in?” He suddenly snaps, dropping his large arms to his sides and moving in closer to you, letting go of the façade of nervousness. “I got other places to be.”

“Oh! You have other places to be??” Immediately Kai realises he has said the wrong thing, when you light up like this. “Great! Go there!”

Then you slam the door in his face. You think he was so close that it knocked his nose- you hope that it knocked his nose. You stay by the door just long enough to hear him grunt on the other side, before sweeping off further into your house to start forgetting he came at all. You spent over 500 years missing him, he can’t just come back one day and treat you like a stop along the way.

Also- what he did, what he is no doubt still trying to do, is unforgiveable. And you refuse to be party to it. No way.

When your door literally flies off the hinges behind you, slamming into the ground with a huge, loud THUD, you whip around with wide eyes and take in a deep breath- ready to yell at this bastard for knocking down your goddamn door-

But he strolls on in, breaking your door further when he steps on it, and holds a hoof up to your face- silencing you. “Y/N… Come on, lets just talk about this.” As you stay completely silent then, Kai takes the opportunity to soften a little bit, using those bovine eyes on you in that way he knows used to make you melt once upon a time. “I missed you.”

… damnit, it still has an effect on you. Not quite the same effect, you’re still holding together - you’re still pissed, - , but that little part of you that was there since you saw him today that desperately wants to accept him back- get a little bit louder.

Now, you can’t do that, you can’t just forgive him, but you can hear him out. On your terms, but… you can be okay with him being in your house… at least. You guess. So, straightening up, you brush his hoof out of your way with the back of your hand, relishing inwardly in the way his face drops at the motion, and head towards the kitchen.

“… fine. Fix that door and if you manage to do that before I finish the tea, you can have some. Deal?”

“I’m on it.”

Lord Shen:

“Shen? I made tea, and thought you might want a cup before you leave?”

“Tea?... I don’t need your tea- “

“Agree to disagree. Sit down.”

This made Lord Shen look at you as if you grew 3 heads and shat on the rug for a good long moment, but you don’t remove your gaze from his even though he’s scary, and after a few moments, he narrows his eyes at you and sits down on the other side of the mat. Success-

“Just a sip.” He tells you, in that hushed voice of his that can be goddamn terrifying depending on what you’ve done, as he picks up a cup in is wing. “I’ve never had tea from you, before… Wonder if it’ll be palatable.” He thinks out loud, half to himself and half to bother you, peering into the cup.

Oh, now- Rolling your eyes, you raise a cup to your own lips, feeling the warmth in your hands, and nod to him. Go on. “Well only one way to find out.” You’ve known Shen for a long time now, you grew up together, so his meanness doesn’t do quite the same thing to you as it does to others. Also, you’ve always been rather resilient, and a little naïve. No matter how hard someone may try to convince you, you cant truly believe that Shen is evil. Evil doesn’t really exist, and if it does then surely it has worse things to do then live inside Shen.

You feel like people calling him evil is just an easy way for them to compartmentalize, and you would rather know him. Which you do. That’s how you kept up eye contact with this insane bird-

“Right… “

As you take a sip yourself, and feel the warm liquid slide down your throat and fill your insides with lovely heat, you wait patiently for Shen to do the same. It takes him a moment, scowling at you as you drink your tea, before he lets out a dramatic sigh and tries it himself. “Alright, alright.” You watch his pretty face change, no longer does it look like he smelt something awful- it actually looks… surprised. Vaguely pleasantly surprised, as a matter of fact, as he looks back into the cup. “… hm.”

“Hmm?~ “

“Its… well, I’m not dead.”

“Did you really think it would kill you, Shen? That I would try to kill you?” You deadpan, but raise your brows expectantly when he raises his eyes to you.

… He pauses. “… well- “

“Shen!”

“You’re right, you wouldn’t have what it takes, would you? No… “ Smirking, Shen takes another sip of his tea. “Thank you, though. This tea is remarkably edible.”

… sighing, you roll your eyes look away as you take another sip yourself. “Thanks. You’re welcome.”

Shen steals your attention again, though, as he drains the last of his tea and holds out the cup to you, an oddly adorable - yet still crazy, - expression on his face. Soft, and almost pleading. “… Can I have some more, then?” His voice, of course, is still terrifying.

A slow grin spreads across your face. “… I thought you were on your way out?”

“Oh shut up, and pour me some tea.”

Tai Lung:

“Y/N!” A familiar voice yells, banging at your front door.

“Tai??” You ask, wide eyed and shocked as you pull the door open and see him standing there.

“Y/N.” He says again, unbelievable and desperate relief in his tone as he pulls you against his chest in the warmest hug you’ve ever experienced- well, since you last saw him. 20 years ago. He breathes in at your head, taking as much of your scent as he can. As he breathes out, he releases a growl, but it is not an unhappy one- its full of comfort. When he speaks, his voice pitters into a bit of whine, at the end. “It’s been too long… “

You just squeeze him closer to you, burying your face in his shoulder and closing your eyes. Its unbelievable to you that he’s here, with you again. How did he get out?? You don’t even care. You don’t even care if he should be out, or what he’s going to do now that he is, you just want to stay here tucked away in him, listening to his heartbeat and holding on to it.

After a few minutes, though, you begin to get nervous someone will see him and call someone- and he would be taken away again- so, sniffing, you pull back gently, and flash him a warm smile; nodding inside. “Do you- do you want some tea??”

Still holding onto your hands/the ends of your wings/paws/etc, his paws being so much larger than what you have, he keeps you close to his body and warmly grins. “I don’t want to let you go, little one.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Alright then.”

You lead him inside and he closes the door behind you both, and while you’re pouring the water into the kettle he wraps his arms around your body from behind and sets his head on top of yours, curling his tail around one of your legs as well. He purrs.

After you set the kettle over the fire Tai Lung sits himself down on one of your kitchen chairs - again, not letting go of your hand/wing/paw/etc at all for even a moment, - before urging you onto his lap where he wraps himself back around you again. “I’ve missed you… “He growls into your hair. “So much, little one… I thought about you, in there, you know… all about you… “

“Oh, I’m assuming you thought about other things, too… “You reply, rolling your eyes, though still very much happy he’s here. Other things, like the scroll… dragon warrior… Shifu… escape…

Chuckling against you, and brushing his tail against you, Tai nods. “Yes, but when I was thinking of you… “ He suddenly squeezes your waist in his paws, making you yelp. “You were the only thing, on my mind… “

“Hmm,” You just him, leaning your head on his chest.

After a few more moments of blessed enjoyment of each other’s company, each other’s touch and warmth, Tai speaks up again. This time, there is a hint of nervousness in his voice that causes you to lift off of his chest in order to watch his face; Concerned. “Were you… uh, I mean, have you… “ Sighing, he looks away for a moment and gathers himself. Then looks back, serious. “Is there anyone else?... “

The look on his face is saying that he wouldn’t blame you, if their were. You were without him for a long, long time. And he would prefer you be happy, with someone else… then depressed, and alone. It would hurt him… but he loves you.

It tells you that you made the right decision in waiting all this time.

With a small, sad smile, you shake your head at him. “I promised you- I would wait. I’m yours, Ta- Ah!“ He kisses you then like he cant help it, growling into your mouth.

When he pulls back, his paw on your jaw, theirs a pleased grin on his face- but unbelievably fond look in his yellow eyes. “… I’m yours too, Y/N.”

#Kung Fu Panda Villains x Reader Drabbles #Kung Fu Panda Villains x Reader #Kung Fu Panda Villains #KFP Villains #KFP Villains x Reader #General Kai #KFP General Kai #General Kai x Reader #KFP General Kai x Reader #Lord Shen #KFP Lord Shen #Lord Shen x Reader #KFP Lord Shen x Reader #Tai Lung #KFP Tai Lung #Tai Lung x Reader #KFP Tai Lung x Reader #Drabbles

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bogleech · 3 months

Note

I know this is going to be a silly question but I’m being put on adderall potentially soon and I have an anxiety about taking it because I watched that Netflix documentary about individuals who were put on it but had super adverse side effects or are unable to come off their high doses except by tapering off insanely slowly. It got me wondering about how likely it is for someone to become physically dependent on it or have such strong side effects that their physical health becomes a danger. The documentary was called “take your pills” or something along that line and since you take them I was wondering if the documentary was largely sensationalist or if these larger issues of taking adderall are due? Maybe some of your followers are familiar with what I’m talking about if you’re not?

Yeah that entire doc sounds like fearmongering lies. ANY medication can disagree with some people, there are allergies and sensitivities, but if you for-sure have ADHD then adderall will typically do nothing but calm down the topic-jumping of your brain, or just not really do anything at all. A tiny portion of people report that it made them feel shitty or "zombie-like." This is the first I've ever heard that anyone had to "taper off it." My ADHD symptoms themselves cause me to constantly forget doses. Sometimes I remember to take it every day for a month, then something throws me off and I forget for the whole next month. More often I'm just remembering to take it a few times a week, scattered randomly between days of forgetting. One reason it's so easy for me to forget is that I don't physically feel any different either way. There are no repercussions or "withdrawals" or anything at all noticeable if I miss any number of doses at any moment, and sometimes I only realize I missed a bunch because I'll evaluate how much I've gotten done, and when I've missed the adderall I find out I've wasted a whole lot more time lost in random thoughts or doomscrolling instead of finishing work. When I do take it I am someone it definitely works for because suddenly I achieve a reasonable if still imperfect level of productivity and focus. If those people interviewed were even real, they were one-in-a-million extremes, probably just outright allergic to something or other in the pill, or their entire diagnosis was wrong. Otherwise it's more likely the whole thing was scripted misinformation.

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livesincerely · 10 days

Text

It starts as a pretty typical shift, which, honestly, should’ve been his first warning.

They’re responding to a fire at an upscale health and fertility clinic. The sprinkler system’s already taken care of any flames but that hadn’t stopped the people inside from trampling over each other in their hurry to evacuate; he doesn’t envy Chim, Hen, or Eddie at all, watching the three of them struggle to wrangle a crowd of hysterical pregnant people and their partners into some semblance of order.

Which leaves Buck to do a final sweep of the building for any stragglers.

He’s checking the storage area tucked in the back when he opens a door and is hit with a face full of some kind of… mist?

It's sticky and cloying—almost like a perfume, maybe, but with a bitter edge—and his eyes start tearing up immediately, sinuses stinging. He wipes his face with the sleeve of his uniform, and that seems to help some, but he’s definitely gonna need a shower and a change of clothes when they get back to the station.

“Buckley to Cap,” he calls over the radio. “We’re all clear inside.”

“Copy that,” Bobby responds. “Meet back outside, we’ll regroup.”

He’s outside chatting with Munroe from Squad 4 when things suddenly shift.

Buck staggers on the spot, hot and hazy with it, something sharp tingling behind his teeth. His vision is swirling, his mouth painfully dry.

He blinks once, then twice, then swallows hard.

“—okay? Your whole face has gone red, man.”

“I’m—“ Buck tries. When the fuck did it so hot? “It’s—“

“Do you need to sit down?” Munroe asks, reaching out to steady him. “I can help you over to the curb—“

Buck bats the hand away, bristling at the contact. “No, no, I’m good, I just got dizzy for a second—“

A growl cuts through the air behind him, fierce and furious. Monroe startles, his eyes wide, but it’s like Buck’s entire spine softens, tension seeping away as if it was never there.

He’s certain before he even turns. “Eddie.”

“What’s wrong?” Eddie demands, and his hands land on Buck’s shoulders, then shift up to cup his jaw, his eyes darting over every inch of his face. Buck relaxes into his hold, something about Eddie’s touch soothing a part of him that he didn’t know needed soothing. “Why do you— What happened?”

“What happened with what?” Buck mumbles, ducking down until he can rest his forehead against Eddie’s shoulder.

This quickly proves to be the best idea ever because Jesus Christ, since when did Eddie smell so fucking good? His scent washes over him—rich, decadent even, like the darkest of dark chocolate with just a hint of something spicy underneath—and it’s mouthwatering, it’s addicting, and Buck leans closer, desperate for more.

“You smell really good,” Buck informs him—just in case Eddie didn’t know, because he’s helpful like that. He rubs his cheek against Eddie’s neck, then nuzzles against his jaw, the rough edge of his stubble prickling deliciously against his skin. “Like, so fucking good.”

Eddie makes a noise that’s halfway between a laugh and a groan and his arms curl around his waist, strong and steady.

“I smell good?” he asks, incredulous. “I smell— Buck, I can smell you clear from the other side of the building.”

“No, you can’t,” Buck disagrees. “‘M on suppressants. My scent’s all…” He drags the tip of his nose along Eddie’s hairline, then presses his mouth to his temple, breathing him in. “Subtle. Muted. Though, there was a study back in 2017 that found that excessive suppressant use can sometimes lead to this weird condition that makes everything smell and taste like coconut, but to be honest, their sample size left a lot to be desired—“

“No, Buck,” Eddie interrupts, in a voice like sandpaper. “I can definitely smell you.”

“Oh.” Buck considers this for a moment. “What do I smell like?”

Eddie makes another one of those noises—low and throaty and a little pained—and his hands splay wide over his lower back.

“Chim!” he calls over his shoulder. “Chim, I need you over here!”

“Eddie,” Buck whines. “You didn’t answer me.” A horrible thought occurs to him, and his voice wobbles when he asks, “Do I smell bad?”

“Trágame, tierra,” Eddie mutters under his breath. Louder, he says, “No, querido, you don’t smell bad. You smell…”

Eddie pauses a second too long. Buck pulls back to look at him, a little afraid of what he’ll find, but Eddie’s eyes are dark and hooded, those brown eyes smoldering like embers. His nostril flare as he takes in another deep inhale, and his gaze turns heated, turns hungry.

Buck’s breath hitches in his throat.

“Good,” Eddie finishes hoarsely. “Really good.”

#*editor's note #911 abc #buddie #buddie fic #911 abc fic #*the writing desk #bits & bobs #another glimpse of my wip #this is an abo fic so buyer beware #but I hope you enjoy

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astridthevalkyrie · 1 year

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this is pretty short and mostly just me posting so i can delete it without being sad that i wrote a couple paragraphs for nothing. but um yeah i am working on a jumin oneshot which will mostly be from his pov, plus i really hate writing women fighting over a man unless i can put an ironic twist on it—next thing you know i'm going to write sarah but with some actual nuance. until then, enjoy <3

The first time you see Sarah Choi after your marriage is at a birthday party, held in a grand hall. You see her at the same time she sees you, and your eyes widen before you try to get lost in the crowd.

“Boss?” a voice comes through your headset. “Did you already give the okay to serve lunch?”

“Yes. Ms. Yun wanted it served right after the speeches—”

“You!” Sarah screeches furiously. With a quick apology, you mute your mic and face the woman. She’s seething, although for what reason you can’t possibly imagine. Yes, she’s getting sued, but you didn’t tell Jumin to sue her (not that you disagreed). He most likely would have done the same thing with the information Seven gave him, with you in his life or not.

“Ms. Choi,” you plead quietly. I’m working, do not get me in trouble or so help me. “This is someone’s party, perhaps we should step outside.”

“Why should I? Is it suddenly a problem when you’re the one being publicly humiliated for being a gold digger?” She pokes you in the shoulder none too gently. People begin to look in your direction. “Everything was fine before you sunk your claws in!”

“Sunk my claws—gold digger?” you ask in disbelief. Talk about pot calling the kettle black. “Ms. Choi, your legal issues are not my concern.” Then, allowing yourself to be just a little spiteful, “Maybe if you and your sister had left well enough alone, you wouldn’t be in this mess right now.”

The little bit of shame you’re supposed to feel after being so catty is nonexistent. It feels good after what this woman put Jumin through. Maybe to her, she didn’t do anything, but to you, who saw him suffocate at just the idea that he would be forced into a marriage with her and watched his eyes dull every time he was in the same room as her, she hurt him. Before, you didn’t necessarily have the right to get so protective, but now you’re his wife, so you can say whatever you please.

Jumin is your world. No one gets to hurt him, and if they do, they have you to answer to.

“Is everything alright?” Ms. Yun, the person whose birthday party is being held here, rushes up, clearly frantic about anything going wrong.

“I want her out,” Sarah hisses, pointing at you. You almost roll your eyes, but keep yourself in check.

“What? But this is our event coordinator.” Ms. Yun looks surprised at even the idea of kicking you out. “She organized this whole thing, I need her here to continue making sure things run smoothly.”

“I’m your guest! And I want her gone, now!”

“Absolutely not,” Ms. Yun responds, a frown on her face. “I’m sorry," she says to you, "I won’t keep you.”

“Please don’t worry about it. By the way, I didn’t get a chance to tell you earlier.” You smile at her, but it’s really directed beyond her shoulder, straight at Sarah. “He couldn’t make it, but my husband wanted to thank you for the invitation.”

There’s a screech, and you see one of Sarah’s hands push Ms. Yun to the side, while the hand holding a flute of champagne rises to tip on your head.

Before she gets the chance, you grab her wrist, splashing the drink on her own face instead.

///

“Tell me what happened again.” Jumin has the most boyish grin you’ve ever seen on him as he looms over you in bed. “Just one more time. Sarah sees you, and then…”

“I already told you twice!” You laugh, wrapping your arms around him.

“Once more,” he requests, nuzzling into the crook of your neck, “it’s my new favorite story.”

#jumin x reader #jumin x mc #jumin han #mystic messenger #mysme x reader

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ellycrys · 9 months

Text

A Note about Power dynamics in Good Omens

(and how that plays out with Aziraphale and Crowley’s relationship and the choices they make with each other)

Aziraphale and Crowley are dealing with all powerful entities in Heaven and Hell. They aren’t in positions of power…. and they have created safe space with each other. This means that some of what happens between them does come down to testing limits and having the freedom to do things they aren’t able to do elsewhere.

They’ve created their own dynamic…. but they are also exploring and learning about what is possible for themselves…. and what it feels like to have things they haven’t been allowed to have before.

Aziraphale, one the one hand, hasn’t had much in the way of power himself…. and has been bullied by Heaven. So in his interactions with Crowley, has the luxury and freedom to take positions of power and refuse to bend or compromise. To be 'IN CHARGE'. And Crowley indulges this tremendously…. until lines are crossed.

We saw this with Aziraphale and the Ox.

Given the opportunity at first he gorges himself …. because he’s suddenly realized he’s starving and over time is able to refine how he fills that need…. but it is still there, he’s just learned how to control his reaction to that hunger and enjoyment.

As someone who spent a period of time having to go without a lot of things…. I noticed that there was a way of thinking about the things I needed/wanted that didn’t immediately change when I suddenly had them and there was no longer any worry about surviving. It can be an adjustment. And there’s a tendency to hoard or overdo it when enjoying those things at first because your brain is hardwired to think “this could be the last time… I need to get as much of this as I can.” Even if your brain knows better, instincts for survival are automatic and hardwired.

In a normal world there are lots of checks and balances to help balance this kind of growth out so you don't end up swinging to the other side of the pendulum of want.....

But AziCrow have their bubble they’ve created and they are the most powerful beings in that bubble. They can warp reality around them, and force people to go along with whatever they are doing if they really want to. Ahem…. looking at you Aziraphale. (still love you though)

And checks and balances don’t exist in their bubble, so the only person who could stop Aziraphale from going on a power trip is Crowley.

(if I had them I would link to my season 3 thoughts here… I am still working on my thoughts around what happens next... where are you at?)

Crowley has been forced by both sides to take actions and hold positions that don't align with who he is as a core being….

...and doesn’t have the ability to refuse outright any order or demand of hell.

His entire existence has been written around falling for caring too much about things that matter and asking questions.

The universe has demanded things of Crowley that Crowley has been punished for disagreeing with, his words are considered “wrong” and there has been nowhere he could go or escape to avoid the consequences of being himself.

His superiors appear to him in his car or on his television…. he’s literally trapped and unable to stop that from happening, except in the bookshop (that’s a tangent I’m going to step past for now)

Crowley talks about running away a lot. But running away usually has everything to do with Aziraphale and wanting them to be safe, or reacting to Aziraphale during a fight.

So for Crowley running, leaving…. having the power to choose to leave…. to remove himself from a situation is its own exercise of power. It’s a freedom to choose that hasn’t been afforded to him by Heaven or Hell.

So is it a survival mechanism or a protective mechanism…. sure.

But in a very real sense both Crowley and Aziraphale are given the opportunity with each other to act out these things ….

...for Aziraphale it’s the ability to control his universe and for Crowley the ability to choose his own path and to say he will choose it.

They are for each other a way of working through these things they can do nowhere else, and taking risks and doing things they should not be able to do.

#aziraphale #crowley #good omens #power #ineffable husbands #coping strategies #loving each other enough to let the other person make mistakes and try new things even if it's not easy to deal with #aziracrow #aziraphel x crowley #crowley x arizaphale

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religion-is-a-mental-illness · 4 months

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By: Salomé Sibonex

Published: Jan 29, 2024

I’ve been seeking a reprieve from the ugly sides of our world lately and I found it in Hogwarts Wizarding School of Magic.

Even though Harry Potter’s world isn’t utopian, the whimsy of magic and the drama of a battle between good and evil helped wash away the ugly banality of the real world’s problems. There was one problem I couldn’t find a reprieve from, though. In Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Harry encounters a problem I’m all too familiar with and that lives at the core of many societal issues. At this point in the series, Harry’s known for his infamous past as a child who survived a direct attack from the embodiment of evil, Voldemort, and his battles against evil and chaos conquering Hogwarts. And yet, even Harry Potter in a world of elves and flying brooms can’t escape the ever-present human problem of conformity.

Watching Harry Potter struggle to overcome other people’s desire for conformity and disdain for anyone who threatens it made me realize: many people cheering this fictional protagonist on would fight against him in real life.

Despite having proven his loyalty, courage, and inclination to fight against evil, Harry Potter’s warning that Voldemort has returned is met with annoyance and disbelief from everyone but his close friends and the embodiment of wisdom, Dumbledore. This problem introduces a crucial element of what causes a lot of today’s destructive conformity: motivated reasoning. Similar to confirmation bias, motivated reasoning happens when someone is motivated to either agree or disagree with new information based on their current beliefs, thus letting that motivation shape their response more than whether the information is true.

You often hear people lament how, despite having access to all the information in the world, it seems like people are getting dumber. A big part of why access to information alone doesn’t reduce ignorance is because of motivated reasoning. People today are inclined to fight against information that challenges their worldview, often because it’s just easier than updating it.

It would be easier for his peers and the authorities if Harry Potter was wrong about danger on the horizon, so they decide to believe he’s wrong, regardless of whether he’s wrong. They deride and dismiss him with accusations I’ve faced myself when sharing inconvenient truths; his classmates scoff “he just wants to be famous!”, which our culture has shortened to “grifter!” Harry Potter—the infamous beacon of hope and repeated warrior for good over evil—is accused of grifting by his own classmates simply because it’d be easier if that were true. Unfortunately for them, it’s not.

J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series is a masterpiece for many reasons, but one reason is that her characters and the stories they live out are so real despite happening in such a surreal world. Watching the scene where Harry Potter tries to warn people about a problem he’s proven himself trustworthy and competent to assess—only to be shouted down by people who want the easy route today at the risk of hardship tomorrow—felt uncomfortably real.

I criticized the manipulative pressure activists used to make people pledge allegiance to BLM without researching the organization (which turned out to be corrupt) or the movement itself (which turned out to be a guise for spreading destructive ideas in the name of “anti-racism”). When I speak about that today, I’m praised. But then the Israel attack on October 7th happened and suddenly the same message against letting social pressure rush you to pledge allegiance to positions you don’t understand now got me derided for not “using my platform” properly. The pattern repeats.

You can be the same person with the same message, but other people will respond to you differently based on where the winds of culture have blown them this week.

Unprincipled people are constantly shifting their targets because their worldviews aren’t tethered to anything deeper than seeking social approval and avoiding cognitive dissonance. They will wish death on you for not posting a flag emoji while claiming to hold the moral high ground.

Unprincipled people believe their frantic rushing from Current Thing to Current Thing is proof of their moral character, but it’s actually proof of how unreliable the opinions of anyone but your close friends and personal Dumbledores can be. Just look at J.K. Rowling’s experience.

While the fact that people with Harry Potter tattoos were the quickest to turn on the creator of their favorite story simply because her opinions didn’t sway with the ever-changing winds of culture (she maintains the once-uncontested reality that trans-women are trans-women and biological women are biological women), that’s only one example of a conformist culture that hates heroes. Harry Potter himself is the perfect litmus test for whether we have a culture that praises heroes or villains.

Forget about Harry’s magic abilities. What truly makes Harry Potter a magical character isn’t his ability to wield magic, which most of the magic world can do—it’s his character that makes him stand apart from all others. If Harry Potter were a real, non-magical person in our society today, his unusually strong character would make him a pariah. Unlike most of the magical world’s people, Harry Potter is pursuing a goal far bigger than himself; this makes him the target of both disgruntled plebs and power-hungry tyrants. People who don’t have a strong and honorable mission in life hate seeing people who do—it either reminds them they’re wasting their lives or threatens their ability to fulfill their evil mission. A lot of arm-chair internet activists and government officials would hate Harry Potter.

It’s not just that Harry has a unique destiny that makes his character compelling—it’s the fact that he has the courage and determination to pursue that destiny and develop the necessary skills to do so that makes his character admirable. Every person—especially in an individualistic culture that valorizes people who make their own way in life—wants to feel like they have a unique life path that leads to greatness. Luckily for those living in a free society, they do. Unlike in centrally-planned economies like Cuba and China, where your destiny is mostly determined by what your government allows, people in free countries can determine the course of their lives.

The government doesn’t dictate what you can study, what businesses you can open, how many kids you can have, or how much money you’re allowed to make. We’re free to imagine a future for ourselves and set out to develop the skills needed to achieve it. Of course, that doesn’t mean everyone will.

Businesses fail, personal tragedies happen, and obstacles appear. The people who give up on their journey or never get going but believe they could’ve done otherwise harbor regrets, and those regrets easily turn to resentment. These are the bitter people who see the hope and success of others as a stinging reminder of their failures. People who’ve given up or never tried to forge the future they wanted would hate some as determined and ambitious as Harry Potter.

Despite being an orphan, a victim of neglect by his step-family, stalked by a violent gang of death-eaters working for Voldemort, and a childhood victim of assault, Harry Potter doesn’t wear the label of victim.

In a culture like ours that sees victimhood as a hierarchy that dictates your treatment, an individual who refuses to identify as a victim is inherently subversive.

Instead of demanding special treatment because of his hardships, Harry Potter strives not just to overcome them, but uses his hardships as fuel to make him stronger than he would be without them. One might argue it would’ve been better if Harry Potter’s parents were never killed by Voldemort and thus he would’ve never been fated to fight him—and if your idea of a good life is ease and subsistence, that would be true—but your life would make a terrible story. Harry Potter’s victimization by Voldemort’s evil is what imbued him with the ability to become a hero. With darkness comes light, but in a culture that doesn’t believe in light, many people linger in the dark and resent anyone who reminds them their darkness is a choice.

Harry Potter is the archetypical hero. He pursues a mission that starts with his personal journey of understanding himself and helping those close to him, which leads him to help the world. He goes above and beyond what others do to become worthy of the future he wants. He never identifies with the many ways he’s been victimized, but instead transmutes his hardships into victories. And for all these heroic qualities, Harry Potter would be maligned by our culture as privileged, “alt-right,” and much like his creator has experienced, his efforts to do good would be met with hostility and accusations of grifting from people who care more about the ease of clinging to their worldview than discovering the truth.

Entire countries end up on the wrong side of history when they stop cheering for heroes.

#Salomé Sibonex #Salome Sibonex #We The Black Sheep #Harry Potter #heterodox #privilege #oppressor #oppressed #meritocracy #heroes #villains #victimhood #victimhood culture #victimhood hierarchy #religion is a mental illness

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tamelee · 5 months

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Hello, I wondered what you think of the proshipping/anti shipping debate, and maybe where you position yourself?

From what I’ve seen, pro-shipping is usually people saying that you can ship everything you want since you have to "separate reality and fiction"… and most of the time it sounds like an excuse to create/consume incest fanfictions or child porn without guilt

On the other hand, in the anti-shipping side you have people who are treating some media as "irredeemable" for literally nothing… Like, "oh, this story is saying directly into your face that what thing one character has done is bad? So that means the story is not spreading awareness of this harmful behavior"

I think there are wrongs on both sides, but in general I disagree more with the proshipping community, because most proshippers I’ve interacted with are just people who don’t want to accept that there can be consequences to their actions, what they create, and what they consume. I’ve seen a lot of them saying that fiction has no impact on reality, which isn’t true at all. Most of the times proshippers handle sensitive and "problematic" subjects carelessly, sometimes even while spreading misplaced ideas, but don’t want people calling them out on the matter… (by calling out I don’t mean harassment of course, harassment isn’t and never will be a good solution to those problems)

The subject can be pretty complex, I’m curious to hear your thoughts about it! If you want of course, I would understand you not wanting to talk about it… And I’m sorry if expressed myself badly, since I don’t speak english very well

Take care, you’re doing amazing art pieces💙

Hi ^^ it is expressed very well, dw! And thankyou so much 🧡!!

↓🍵;

Well, you specifically talk about shipping, which I think is completely fine. But the debate itself claims so often to be more than just that, using ‘shipping’ for something much too broad to define through these two terms which meaning is questionable.

The debate is only interesting to me because of the whole fiction=/=reality aspect (at least I personally think that is an enjoyable debate, especially reading the arguments.) The most famous and skilled literary theorists and scholars can’t agree on this matter even today because there are too many variables and barriers like culture for example. A lot of opposites are both deemed true and false at the same time and it often lands on a slightly disappointing “it depends”. You say it yourself also. As well as you “leaning more toward one side” because it’s impossible to put a term on it unless someone would write down a bunch of guidelines to which they then commit to. But then you’re more defined by that than by your own thinking or even preferences.

It isn’t so black and white that you can just.. idk, simply throw it all into two terms to define a preference that includes your entire life-experience and gain a Universal agreement by what it even means in the first place with everyone else on the internet, as if that’s how it works with this topic y’know? As if suddenly a shipping-filter will shame our literary masters out of any logic “because a fan/shipper wants ‘x’ to molest ‘y’ through non-con sex in fanwork’ and to say whether that’s okay or not in general depends on which of the two terms you used to define yourself in your bio and literally nothing else. And I don’t see how that logic connects when it is used like that and so often in this case.

I know, this is an exaggeration, but I hope you know what I mean regarding the debate. This isn’t about your ask directly. The “it depends” is kinda frustrating for me too, because I’m always searching for an answer that makes sense for anything >< But what doesn’t here is as I said before, that people don’t even agree with each other either about the meaning of ‘pro/anti’-shipping’. Even the general definition is (or used to?) different and has literally nothing to do with reality/fiction just.. shipping. Whenever another popular post shows up people share that as ‘the next truth’ or even I receive it for clarification for an older post, but then another says something along the lines of “maybe that’s true for them, but to me it means....”

So, where would I position myself? Well, “it depends” on who asks and what it means to them. Nah, I don’t think a single term about shipping can define how I think about the relationship between fiction and reality, what is right/wrong/acceptable/etc which you’re right- is very complex. At least, I refuse to do that if I can help it. I’ve seen enough misunderstandings and the harassment that you’re talking about to think that this isn’t going about it the most efficient way despite some parts being interesting and definitely topics worth talking about whether it is about shipping or something much broader.

“On the other hand, in the anti-shipping side you have people who are treating some media as "irredeemable" for literally nothing… Like, "oh, this story is saying directly into your face that what thing one character has done is bad? So that means the story is not spreading awareness of this harmful behavior"

And you’re completely right about people using ‘whatever/however/whomever’ as an excuse to justify anything, but that itself is kind of common human behavior and I genuinely don’t know what to say about it. Though you bring up something that (and similar extreme views) is why I would definitely lean more towards a separation of fiction and reality. Not to justify anything, but if anything else... I’ve always rooted for the freedom of expression/creativity whether I agree with it or not because censorship has always been tricky and sometimes outright dangerous. Who's going to decide what exactly? The fact that no one will agree with each other remains regardless. (And yes, I think there are definitely things I don’t want to see either of course, but discussing all that is a whole different topic.)

However,

“I’ve seen a lot of them saying that fiction has no impact on reality, which isn’t true at all.”

You’re right again, but to quickly note; fiction=/=reality or fiction having impact on reality isn’t the same thing. Storytelling has always shaped beliefs and perspectives all over the world. In fiction especially, morals and ethics are often explored. Almost always a story is a problem in some form or another that needs to be solved because that’s satisfying, but how are you going to do that? And how will you write it in a way that people root for your character? And how else can you do that than involving the encouragement of a readers’ own reflection of their values and beliefs while simultaneously sharing and possibly influence them with your own?

No one can deny this though? And if they do I wonder about the argument tbh.

If a story can inspire it can also do the opposite. It’s not one or the other.

Storytelling is such a powerful tool and imo it should be used wisely which means something else in every case because... aaahhh “it depends” ><

#asktamelee #fandom talk #cw sensitive topics #cw sensitive topic

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cf56 · 1 year

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When did we become so callous to each other? Are we really starting to let our opinions on the reboot get in the way of considering other people as like, human beings?

If you loved everything about season 3, I love that. This isn’t about that. This is in response to people who are getting outwardly upset at others in the fandom just like, expressing their genuine emotions over things? I saw a prominent blog in the fandom saying they found it funny that people were upset over the show’s ending, because Animaniacs doesn’t have continuity. Okay, but how do you think that changes anything for the people who felt truly upset about that moment? These are characters who folks have loved for years, decades in some cases. They get attached to them. And you really don’t understand how seeing them suddenly perish in a destructive blaze, to end the entire series nonetheless, might be genuinely painful for some to watch? It didn’t give me those kinds of feelings, but it isn’t hard to understand how it might do so for others, and I’m not going to invalidate it by saying they just don’t understand how the show works. Those are real feelings they experienced. They can’t help that.

I saw another prominent blog complaining about people “being pissy” in the tag over things they didn’t like in season 3. It’s like, everyone here loves Animaniacs. Every single person. We all love it in different ways, though. If there’s something that genuinely felt wrong to us emotionally, and we decide to talk about it, that’s not “being pissy”. It’s not trashing the reboot for the sake of it. It’s genuine emotions that some of us felt and talked about. That’s not a sin. How do you expect people to just disregard their own emotions, try to change them, even if you think it’s logically wrong? They’re emotions.

I think the reboot opinion divide has poisoned our minds a bit. We’ve spent so long sitting on either side of the fence, the reboot is good or the reboot is bad, that we’re starting to lose track of the real people who are expressing their opinions on things. A fan is allowed to express their disappointment with the reboot. There’s no rule saying everything has to be rainbows and unicorns when it comes to how we discuss this show we love. If you disagree with something someone says, then disagree. But why get upset that they dared to express their real thoughts at all? They’re allowed to, just as you’re allowed to express all the positive thoughts you want, too. In some cases, it’s not something they can help.

I’ve looked at everything in the tag since season 3 released. Maybe 10% of it has been negative. Probably less. If you can’t handle that, that’s on you, not anyone else who’s trying to express their real opinion on things. I may disagree with those who say everything about season 3 was great, but I don’t challenge their right to say what they think. I don’t try to frame their genuine feelings on it as something invalid. I don’t try to say they don’t understand how the show works just because they view it differently than me. People have a right to their feelings, and they have a right to their opinions. It’s sad to see it going the way it is.

#animaniacs #animaniacs reboot #animaniacs 2020 #animaniacs season 3 #animaniacs spoilers #animaniacs fandom #cfposts

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sweetestdumpling · 3 months

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{ Hrmmmm…

I don’t know what it is about me when it comes to Asuka because I always see people saying she deserves better, and I don’t disagree! She does deserve better and more screen time and not be relegated to just being in cahoots with Lili and nothing else. Even Lili managed to branch out in T8.

While I agree, I also don’t find myself all too bothered by it? That isn’t to say I don’t love Asuka, I adore her tbh. She’s great, I love how brash she is, I love playing as her, I love how she truly helps people out in her own unique way. She’s great imo.

But I’m not mad/disappointed, I don’t blame Lili, and I don’t think the writers hate her. Again, they could have her involved more I agree, but I also imagine her not knowing that side of the Kazama family and I think that’s perfectly fine. We don’t know how big the family is, or if her father chose to not tell her anything for whatever reason since he doesn’t even live on Yakushima anymore (I assume the Kazama’s mainly lived there anyway).

I know I don’t roleplay as Asuka, but I’m writing her a little bit with a friend of mine on discord, and I guess because writing is easily the best way to explore things, I just shrug it off and write my own stuff for her. And regardless if she had power or not, I don’t think it makes her suddenly useless either. Her having powers is super interesting, but I think her not having them is equally interesting (and again, doesn’t make her useless in my eyes, not saying anyone says that tho of course).

Really, the only time I got mad at something was Xiao in SFxT and that’s not even made by Namco so technically doesn’t even count, especially since that was more of her portrayal rather than lack of plot relevance. It kind of makes me feel like I’m not seeing the problem properly (this is a bad habit of mine where I enjoy something or not bothered too much by something a lot of people are and think something is wrong with me so ignore me)

I have other thoughts about this stuff too but I’m on mobile and just had to ramble this out I guess, I’m sorry lol. }

#OOC #{ I need to ramble more about Xiao but idk had to get that out. no one has to agree tho it’s all good ^^ }#{ it’s after 1am so bed time }

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x-ceirios-x · 4 months

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fading away

alec is struggling with the dynamics between himself and jace, and himself and magnus, and in his stress ends up in a fight with someone he didn't mean to hurt. however, it seems rowan doesn't understand his anger is a little misguided

cw: mild cursing

takes place the same night as coa ch12, the hostility of dreams rewrite. could be considered part two.

Rowan turned down the hallway from Clary’s room, rather happy with their conversation. Lately, it felt like they only managed to piss off the only people that liked them, so to have someone be so enthusiastic talking to them made them feel good. Especially Clary. They thought she was annoying beyond recognition in the beginning, but now she was…sweet. An odd description for them to use for someone they knew—no one around them was sweet.

However, they were still worried about Alec. They couldn’t afford to think about Clary for too long. It was rare he and Jace disagreed on anything (at least seriously disagreed, they bickered constantly), so to see him blow up so badly on him was strange, to say the least. They wanted to know what was going on, though they had their suspicions.

On their way through the living room, they gave a quick wave to Magnus—despite his exhaustion, he seemed generally cheerful. At least, to them. He shot a few glares at Jace as he muttered to himself about some chord being stupid because it’s not in the key. And an extra flat. Whatever that meant, they never had an interest in music.

Alec stood just outside Luke’s back door, leaning against the wall. They slowly creaked the door open, then closed it, not wanting to disturb him too much. He had his head leaned back against the cool concrete, eyes closed. “You show up in weird times a lot. Do you know that?” he asked, not opening his eyes to even see who it was. He knew.

They shrugged. “Guess I’m just good. You wanna talk?”

“Not really.” His tone—flat and almost sarcastic—gave them the impression he was upset with them, too, though they didn’t know how to confront that. Well, other than just asking, so they did.

“Something wrong?” they asked. “Between us, I mean. Ignore the rest of it.”

He sat up, rubbing a hand through his hair. “No. No, it’s fine. I’m going to head home—“

He tried to start walking away but Rowan caught his arm, pulling it back. “Alec,” they said, almost pleading suddenly—the guilt ate at them when he did this. He’d go off and be upset by himself, and if it was their fault, they wanted to help clear the air and fix it. Or apologize. Or do whatever they had to to make it better. Obviously there was something wrong and they weren’t letting him get away that easily.

He stared at them for a long moment, looking like he was preparing to argue. He stopped, though, and relaxed, pulling his arm away. They watched something flash in his eyes when he returned to his spot next to the door, something that almost looked angry, but there was more to it than that.

“Ignore everything that happened today. Why are you upset with me?” they asked. “Don’t say you’re not, I can see it. Just explain.”

He huffed, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “There are so many things I just don’t get about you, Ro,” he muttered. “About anyone. About how Jace feels the need to push my buttons, about everyone feeling they’re entitled to the details of my personal life, how Jace is a stupid, blind moron and you just…”

They could tell he was biting his tongue, holding something back. “I just what, Alec?”

“How Jace could like you and not me, alright?” He threw his hands in the air angrily, both falling to his sides with a small clap noise. “There, I said it. Happy?”

There was a lot to unpack in all that, so no, they weren’t. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“How you can spend your entire life trying to make yourself look…I dunno. However you explained it. But you don’t exactly look like a girl. Which, I guess is what you want, and that’s fine! I’ve never cared. But if his type isn’t just super feminine girls like Izzy or something, why can’t it be not girls too?”

He spoke in a harsh whisper, though he was losing energy and the sharpness in his voice by the time he finished his rant. He took a deep breath, no doubt trying to calm his nerves.

“You were there when we broke up, Alec. You know that’s not how he thinks about things. He all but called me a freak.”

“He didn’t mean it.”

“I don’t care what he meant.” Their voice cracked on the final word, though they took a moment to collect themselves. “My point is, he doesn’t really like me these days, either.”

He scoffed. “That’s a load of shit and you know it.”

They looked at him with wide eyes. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“I share a wall with him, I know what you two have been up to the last few weeks.”

Rowan opened their mouth to retort, though snapped it closed when they realized what he was talking about. Just when they thought they were being sneaky, right? Because one kiss in the infirmary led to another in the greenhouse and another during training and another in his bedroom, later…and then several, several more in his room that night. They had to admit, they almost enjoyed everything going on; it made everything feel almost normal again. But they knew they were still much more emotionally involved in it all than he was. And they were torturing themselves—they were a distraction, it was as simple as that.

“You don’t know the half of it,” they said, voice barely above a whisper. “It’s not—it’s not whatever you think is going on.”

“Really? Because I think a few times a week I have to put a pillow over my ears to not deal with the noise. Not something I wanted to be exposed to.”

His bitter tone infuriated them—he acted like he had everything about them figured out, when if he would have asked, he could have gotten the whole story. About how they were still a little more in love with him than they thought they were, how they walked a thin line between hating him and loving him every day, and all the complicated feelings that came along with it. And their time with Jace, lately, wasn’t because he cared, it was because he didn’t want to think about other problems in his life and that hurt worse than the argument that ended their relationship a few months prior.

“How do you think Magnus feels?” they asked, raising their voice more than intended. Quickly, they realized what they did and quieted down. “You’re screwing around with him but you don’t actually love him. Who would expect you to? But the worst part is, you're using it as a distraction so you don’t have to think about the fact that you’re in love with your parabatai. I am dealing with the same shit.”

Alec’s cold stare burned into them, anger radiating off of him. “You don’t know what’s going on between Magnus and I—“

“And you know what, I would if you told me. I am your best friend outside of Jace, you’ve trusted me with your life longer than I can remember. I was the first person to figure out that you were gay and the first person to come to you and tell you it was fine! I don’t care—I’ve never cared! What I care about is the fact that you seem to think you can’t trust me anymore!”

“Why would I trust someone that is screwing around with the one person I asked them not to?” he asked. “I didn’t ask for my own sake, Rowan, I asked for yours. He broke your heart once, I didn’t want to see it happen again. But you’re so busy trying to meddle in everyone else’s problems you won’t let yourself see that I’m trying to help you!”

The two stood there for a moment, the tension rushing at them in waves, then slowly receding. They couldn’t stand this—out of all people, Alec was the person they wanted to be fighting with the least right now. That was their best friend and they couldn’t seem to figure out how to talk to each other other than a blow-up argument.

“Alec—“ they started, reaching out as he turned away from them. They waited too long to say something—he took their silence as an answer of some kind. He brushed past them, arm brushing their hand as he walked by, muttering something about going home.

They stood for a long moment, watching him walk away. They were worried for him—they were always worried for him, but now moreso. He was angrier than usual, and apparently they were part of the cause. He wasn’t wrong—they spent a lot of time trying to fix everyone else’s issues so they didn’t have to think about their own. They didn’t have to think about the effects of their new situation with Jace if they could fix his and Alec’s problems. That was what they did, though—they fixed things, made people’s lives easier, and enjoyed the results from the shadows. Isabelle would probably never know who swings through the training room when she’s done to put things away so she didn’t get grounded for leaving weapons out, and Max wouldn’t know who leaves those free, used books from the mundane library down the street on his bed, they just appeared. Because they knew he liked them. And that’s what they wanted to do for Alec if he’d only let them.

They heard the low creak of the door behind them and whipped around, preparing to deal with someone yelling at them. Instead, Magnus stood there, leaning against the doorframe. “Are you alright?” he asked. “That sounded like quite the fight.”

“Fine,” they muttered, pinching the bridge of their nose. “Just perfect, actually. He’s such a fucking prick—“ They muttered a few other expletives to get their anger out, including very colorful language that Maryse would ground them for a month for. They weren’t even that angry at him, just at themselves, but it was misdirected because they were still upset and they knew that.

Magnus’s look softened and he stood up from the wall. “Come inside. I’ll make you some tea.”

“I don’t wanna deal with Blondie in there.”

“He’s in his own world. I’m sure he won’t bother us.” He offered an encouraging smile so they followed him, deciding they didn’t have the energy to argue with anyone else. He started the water and rifled through the cabinets until he found two mugs, muttering something about Luke not minding after he just saved his life. He emerged with two—Magnus took the one that said World’s Best Dad that was covered in blue hearts, and they took the other. There was a cartoon girl on it, probably from some movie they hadn’t seen.

“I do know you’re trying to help, dear, but I think Alec needs some space,” he said after a moment, speaking quietly so they didn’t disturb anyone else in the house. “The events of the past few weeks have affected him more than he’d like to admit.”

They frowned. “I think I’ve known him a little longer than you have.”

He smirked—it was this slightly mischievous smile that just irritated them. He seemed to make that face at them a lot, like he knew something he wasn’t going to share. “That is very true. But I see your heart is in the right place, peanut. You just need to let him cool off first.”

They made a face at the nickname—one of shock and disgust. “Peanut?” they asked. “That’s gross. Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“The…I dunno. The nicknames. I don’t like that.”

The little smile he kept convinced them he was most certainly not going to stop that.

It was quiet for a long moment, then Rowan finally spoke up. “What’s your deal with me, anyway?” they asked. “I know you know Clary. And you’ve got a special interest in Alec—you’re pretty cold to everyone else, though. Why me?”

He shrugged, picking at the blue and black nail polish on his hands. “I believe you have a good heart, dear. Don’t you?”

“I think every time I turn around, I manage to make someone hate me.”

“But you’re trying. And being such a good person, you’re going to struggle with that for a long time—until you meet someone with a temperament. And before you get too attached—Jace will not be that person for you. I hope you learn that lesson before he teaches you. Again, from what I heard.”

They scoffed and rolled their eyes. “Yeah, my love life has been the topic of the Institute since we broke up back in June,” they said with a sigh. “A year and a half, gone, because he decided he wanted something new and shiny rather than the person that has been in love with him since they were thirteen. Whatever.”

“It’s very clearly not whatever, but I understand. I’ve had my fair share of relationships, as well, and some of them ended badly in those circumstances. I understand.” It was around this time the water started boiling, so he took the opportunity to finish preparing the tea and pour some into their mug.

“I should have mentioned this. I don’t really drink tea,” they muttered, looking at the odd-colored liquid in the mug. “I mean, I guess I’ll try it. I’m a coffee person.”

“So I’ve heard,” he said with that same knowing smile that pissed them off. “Tell me. Do you not sleep because of drinking too much coffee, or drink too much coffee to not sleep?”

“Who said I don’t sleep?”

He shrugged. “Pale, bags under your eyes—I’m gonna guess you don’t drink enough water, either, but we don’t have to get into all that in one night. I’m just curious.”

They looked at him through narrowed eyes for a moment, trying to figure out why he was so curious about things. Magnus reminded them of a cat—only around when it was just the right moment, or to be a pain. It seemed he enjoyed being a thorn in their side, though that may not be what he was trying to do.

“Nevermind it,” he said after a beat of silence. “That tea has some calming and sleep-inducing herbs in it, it should help.”

“Thanks,” they said plainly, still scanning him for information they couldn’t figure out.

He raised his mug in mock-cheers and acknowledgement of what they said, then returned to the living room. They crawled on the counter, leaning against the cabinets—Luke’s kitchen was cozy. The one at the institute felt sterile and too-clean, but this had some warmth to it. The whole house had warmth and felt lived in. They wondered if that’s what life in Idris would have been like—growing up in the Manor rather than in the Institute where things were cold and unloved quite frequently. Again, they wondered—think that might be two good words to describe them, too. It certainly felt like it, lately.

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lunar-years · 2 years

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I’m so beyond excited for Taylor finally touring but man does the fandom on here get toxic fast and with the SAME DISCOURSE we have gone over about a trillion times for tours past…

And I think people are so annoying on both sides!! Asking someone to explain their financial situation or demanding they justify their expensive tickets, or flat out implying fans who get tickets for multiple shows are as bad as scalpers taking from other swifties…that’s nuts! At the end of the day, everyone is subject to the same Ticketmaster system, which is actually much more fair than it has been in the past (I, for one, do not miss the rep days when fans who didn’t have the time/energy to watch the Taylor-eating-off-her-sweater video 24 hrs a day got lesser priority). The codes are random. Our chances are all equal here. These stadiums hold 60k+ people. A few mega fans going to five shows is not the issue people think it is.

At the same time, it’s really gross how dismissive certain people are of the fans who can’t afford to go the show or won’t be able to get tickets for whatever reason and are simply expressing their disappointment and frustrations. This fandom definitely gets weirdly elitist and cliquey around tour time. All the “popular blogs” seem to get together to go to a bunch of a shows across the country and post about it constantly (and I want to reiterate there is absolutely nothing wrong with this in and of itself, it is their own blogs and people are allowed to have friends and go to many shows) BUT if you are not in those groups, it does get hard. You start to feel like a lesser fan or like you’re missing out, and it can get nasty when certain blogs cross the line from just enjoying themselves while going to a bunch of shows to straight up bragging and jumping down the throats of anyone who disagrees with them or has a (polite, reasonable) complaint about prices/marketing/etc surrounding the tour. And yes, certain (but far from all) blogs do this. They become almost…bullies? And in certain groups there’s definitely a “better than thou” mentality that develops that clearly excludes other fans. And it sucks.

I know it’s only going to get worse when Taylor starts doing meet and greets and suddenly we’re back to arguing over whether certain fans “deserved it.” Meeting Taylor for a second time is really not as unfair as people make it out to be. Some people are just really, really lucky. Now, when people are directly asked if they’ve met Taylor before and lie, yeah it’s a little more questionable and annoying, but we’re all just people. We’re all fans, and when presented the opportunity, fans want to meet her. I don’t think someone who met Taylor on the Rascal Flatts tour in 2006 when they were 12 should never be allowed to meet her again. Let’s be serious with ourselves. But by that same token, it’s like some people don’t even try to understand why it’s hard for fans who have never come close to meeting her see the same fans get all the opportunities over and over again. Especially when they come on here and flaunt how they’ve met her three times and then in the same post immediately try to get Taylor Nation’s attention…yet again.

I know it won’t happen because it’s been one (1) day since tour announcement and my dash is already unbearable, but maybe (on both sides) we should just be a little more aware that there are other fans beyond ourselves, and have a little more empathy for one another!

#my life got so much easier when I just accepted I’m probably not going to meet Taylor and stopped focusing on it so much #and just enjoying discussing the tour on here and fangirling over surprise songs #and staying in my corner!! unfollowing the blogs that get annoying!!#by the same token. some fans undeniably get incredibly nasty to others then meet Taylor 4 times on the same tour.#and yeah. it’s frustrating!! that feeling sucks!! of course it does!! we’re real people with human emotions!#and i think it’s okay if we say that it feels crappy on our blogs in our space!!#idk if I’m making sense here but.#in Taylor’s own words. some of you need to calm down.#the eras tour #ts #Taylor swift #eras tour #midnights #it was also much worse when there were secret sessions and my hot take is I’m glad she doesn’t do those anymore.

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chaotic-guinea-pig · 5 months

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For the character ask game: 7, 8, 18, 21, 26. For Kyle.

26: do you see Kyle as the taller one or Stan? I’m always very interested to see how different artists and/or fic writers view heights in general. Typically it’s common for people to make Kyle the taller one, but I’ve always enjoyed the idea that, as a kid, Kyle was one of the shorter guys in school but ended up getting a huge growth spurt around middle school - thus popping up taller the the other main three. But I’m curious to see your take on it! (And if you’d like I think it’d be cool to know how you imagine Stan and Kyle in your fic, like heights, clothes, scars, accessories etc!)

(Ask game here!) TEEHEE, YAY THANK YOU ANON FOR ASKING ABOUT MY OTHER FAVE. :D

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

How we all let him play and succeed in the basketball team! Kyle in canon does have wide variety of interests, so I do adore that in fanon, we bring out his sporty side more!

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

cracks knuckles Here we go lmao. I'm choosing violence today. <33 Actually should say that I don't see this as much anymore - this is more reacting to something that was common earlier 2023:

The way fandom holds Kyle to a much higher moral standard than others, hands down. I noticed this happens with morally right, outspoken characters in general, but it seems that whenever Kyle makes a mistake or is a hypocritical asshole, he is suddenly the worst and "as bad as Cartman." which... honey no, that's not it at all. Kyle is flawed, yes, but to say he's as bad as Cartman is blatantly wrong imo. When you reduce Kyle to just a bad guy, you just lose so much nuance which is a shame because the fact that he tries to be a moral person is SO FASCINATING!!

I've said it before but also how the fandom judges Kyle for not saving Stan during YGO/Assburgers. Someone on Tumblr said it first (can't find the original post), but my issue with the "But Stan saved Kyle many times, why can't Kyle?!" argument is that in all of those times, there was an easy fix. In 'Super Best Friends', all Stan had to do was break the glass to stop him from drowning, while in 'Cherokee Hair Tampons', Stan tricked Cartman into donating his kidney to Kyle. All simple solutions. But when it comes to depression, there's no simple fix at all (nevermind the fact that Kyle is like... 9, and adults struggle with this too).

(And of course, people are allowed to disagree with Kyle's actions, or think he should have done more. I just think that putting a moral judgement i.e. calling him good/bad over something as complicated as depression rubs me off the wrong way.)

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?

IKE!! I really adore their sibling relationship, how Kyle goes from finding Ike annoying (as any young kid would do), to how he becomes protective and caring over him.

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

Favourite thing: KYLE IS SUCH AN INTERESTING CHARACTER TO EXPLORE. You can put him in many different scenarios and get interesting character studies! You could do an character study before the Post COVID special, you could explore his need to do the right thing and be the mature one (bonus points if this is in a Stick of Truth AU!) and so on.

Least favourite thing: This is specific to 'A Ballad of True Hearts' but it was heartbreaking to write this kid get into an crisis over his morals and his identity after failing to save Stan from banishment. A young prince with pure intentions finds out how cruel politics can be in the worst way possible by losing his soulmate and best friend and almost-lover to banishment. A young prince who only wanted to right by his kingdom by getting humans to join knighthood... only for it to backfire. SIGH.

For a more general answer though, I would say probably trying to find the right balance between the compassionate Kyle versus the times where he can be unintentionally cold vs him being hotheaded. Not something I dislike per se, but more like something challenging!

26. Do you see Kyle as the taller one or Stan?

OOOHHHOOHHHH OKAY, so I'm a believer that Kyle initally starts as the shorter one when they hit puberty, only because I think Stan would totally heckle him for his height AND hear me out, okay - Cartman getting his ass handed to him constantly by the shortest kid of their group… how super embarrassing for him. <333 And of course, by the time high school starts, Kyle gets a growth spurt and becomes the tallest one in their group. In a world where Style gets together during high school years, their height differences is something they banter about, hehe.

(And if you’d like I think it’d be cool to know how you imagine Stan and Kyle in your fic, like heights, clothes, scars, accessories etc!)

Ahh, very sweet of you to ask this, hehe! For heights, I imagine them to be more or less to be of the same height, just to follow the "Stan and Kyle are on equal footing" symbolism.

I'm going to be honest and say that at the start, I didn't put too much thought into their outfits because I kinda just imagined them dressed in their Stick of Truth/Trilogy outfits, except older haha. Stan pretty much wears this throughout the fic. His blue helmet, however, does become cracked and shattered after their fall from the sky at the end of chapter 10. So by Act 2, he ends up sporting some bucket-hat looking helmet like this (except without the rustiness of course!)

(Source)

Before he was banished, he did occasionally wear a surcoat that bore the Broflovski House emblem (what that looks like... I'm not sure yet LMAO). He doesn't wear this in present now ofc since that's easily identifiable to assassins.

As for Kyle in Act 2, he definitely wears his Black Friday trilogy outfit. As for Act 1... he is said to dress in a typical attire for elf pages, so I imagined something like the elf enemies in Stick of Truth. Maybe this little guy in particular:

Edit: Jks lmao I'm retconning this :') Kyle wears a plain robe, hood and cloak in act 1.

Speaking of, I may do a minor retcon to remove his ushanka hat until the beginning of Act 2, and replace it with one of the elf hats. It doesn't quite make sense for leafy, temperate Larnion to have ushankas.

As for his attire as the prince - I'd like to think he wore red robes that were more simple and had less patterns than his Stick of Truth one. The crown (another retcon I gotta do eeeeeeep), is a circlet! Probably similar to Thranduil's crown circlet from The Hobbit, but same colour as the branch crown that his Stick of Truth persona as (which is the crown that Gerald wears!) He doesn't wear this in the present, though. :(

RIGHT FOR SCARS... in chapter 9-11, they both bruises on their faces from their brawl in chapter 9. And eye bags... yes, they're chronically tired and in desperate need of rest. They do have scratches and scars around from their run-in with the assassins - noticeable in the legs and arms, which gets covered anyway by their attire. Stan still has scars around the torso from the torture.

Hope that helps, I apologise if it was vague. Kinda just chill with leaving it to people's imaginations, and whether they wish to imagine the canon designs or not.

Thank you again for the ask!! :]

#asks #kyle broflovski #a ballad of true hearts

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k-s-morgan · 2 years

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TW: Honest (bit harsh) opinion about Tomarry fanfics!

Do you mind if I rant a little Kat? I'm currently in the hunt of good Tomarry fanfics (all 7k of them on ao3: slash and no fem!Harry for now), and honestly a lot of what I read, even some that are popular (10k+ Kudos...) are just BAD. A lot LOT LOOOOT of writers just don't know how to frame Tom/Voldemort's character with all his flaws, personality disorders, qualities, wits and charisma... Seriously, it's borderline cringy sometimes, especially the kid/teenager Tom in the time-travel tropes or the redeemed Voldemort who is suddenly a do-no-wrong! I cannot stand it as a picky reader. I appreciate their dedication and effort, I also have some fanfic ideas that I would love to write but I still won't allow myself to until I study psychology, personality disorders and even child development in depth so that i put out quality content. Isn't research part of the writing process? Only a handful (for now) have managed to really nail the darkness of Tom/VM and twisted romance (about 7 including you). I know I will be told "don't read them then", but this is just my opinion feel free to disagree.

No problems, rants are always welcome!)) I understand what you mean. I’m a picky reader myself, and in most fandoms, I don’t like the majority of even the most top-rated stories. Just, they don’t work for me at all.

In the end, though, I think it comes down to our subjective preferences as readers vs. writers’ motivation for writing something. Every reader is going to look for something specific. Like you, I favor darker, more canonical versions of Tom, and when I encounter his innocent depictions, in most cases, I reject them. At the same time, despite not liking good!Tom, I love dark!Harry a lot. There is no logic here because dark!Harry goes against canon as much as good!Tom does, yet I love the former and dislike the latter. Many people hate both; others love both. It’s difficult to understand why this happens, it’s just how it is. In my other fandom, Shadowhunters, both protagonists are good. I can read about a dark version of MC1 (Magnus) but not the other (Alec). No idea why.

Similarly, writers treat writing in very different ways. Some strive to create canon-compliant narratives with perfectly canonical characters; others prefer complete AUs rooted in research; many writers simply want to have fun. They don’t care about realism or canon or historical accuracy, they just share their ideas and enjoy the process. Research can be a part of fanfiction, but it’s not obligatory - fics aim to bring joy and provide entertainment. I’m sure that for absolutely every fic, there is at least one person who is going to love it.

Love, I think, is the main motivator for writers. They are passionate about characters, they want to share their dramas, joy, porn without plot, humor, etc., and so they do it - just because they want to. If they loved writing their story, whatever it is, it’s already rewarding.

For instance, maybe someone wanted to redeem Tom or Voldemort as soon as possible - this was their major goal for writing because they liked the idea, related to Tom on a personal level & wanted to explore this hope for a quick redemption, were simply bored or curious about this kind of plot. People also have different perceptions: for example, sometimes I read a story about a serious argument between the characters and I feel like it was resolved too unbelievably quickly. I grow frustrated, go to see what other people said, and discover that mostly everyone loved the resolution and felt it was realistic.

WHGTB is similar in this regard. Some people side with Tom; some side with Harry. Whatever the resolution is in the last chapter, I have no doubts there will be those who’ll hate it. Some will think it’s unfair to Tom; others will think it’s unfair to Harry or to both or to the story as a whole. I actually saw someone discuss how Tom became too good and they lost interest in reading - but there are other people who think Tom remains a monster. There are no writers or readers with wrong positions in these scenarios, people just perceive things very differently from one another.

Of course, some stories are written with more skills than others - age and experience can play big roles here. I’m embarrassed of many things I wrote in the past, but at the time, I thought they were pretty great :D As readers, we can’t automatically know who wrote what and why, but all stories have their audience. It’s unfortunate to be unable to find enough fics I specifically would like - I probably like 1 fic in every 10 I read, but I’m grateful for the ones I do enjoy, and there is always writing. It’s so gratifying to write and express my vision. Besides, every writer contributes to the extended life of their fandom, whether they have a wide or small circle of readers.

I hope you’ll start writing when you feel like it and that the process will bring you a lot of joy, too! Writing can be pure magic.

#my fics #fanfiction #tomarry

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