#and to be spooned

[brattybottomdyke]

.

#i want cuddles 🥺 #and to be spooned #and snuggled #and kissed #and touched #i want to fall asleep all curled up against someone please #bottom.spm

[podcastwizard]

in a kinder world i live in an i spy page

#i would be a little mouse and my bed would be the spoon

[indelibleevidence]

People with low spoons, someone just recommended this cookbook to me, so I thought I'd pass it on.

I always look at cookbooks for people who have no energy/time to do elaborate meal preparations, and roll my eyes. Like, you want me to stay on my feet for long enough to prepare 15 different ingredients from scratch, and use 5 different pots and pans, when I have chronic fatigue and no dishwasher?

These people seem to get it, though. It's very simple in places. It's basically the cookbook for people who think, 'I'm really bored of those same five low-spoons meals I eat, but I can't think of anything else to cook that won't exhaust me'.

And it's free!

#disability #spoonie #low spoons recipes #the sad bastard cookbook

[rainbowpopeworld]

This is a big thing that I continue to work on unlearning/relearning

#care tasks #self care #cleaning is a process #a never ending cycle #judgement makes it harder #morally neutral #spoons #spoonie #disabled #nd things #neurodivergent #cleaning #oh no it's queue

[something-existing-somewhere]

Sorry I Spent all mY spoons this week already and it's fucking Tuesday. We're heading to the knives

#actually spoonie #chronic pain #fibromyalgia #actually mentally ill #chronic illness #aroace agender #spoonie #chronic fatigue #disability #actually disabled #chronic disability #spoon theory

[thepeacefulgarden]

#rest #give yourself permission to rest #self care #self care is not selfish #self compassion #self respect #self love #work culture #grind culture #stop the glorification of busy #spoons #chronic illness #burnout #compassion fatigue #activism fatigue #no guilt #no shame

[urayuli]

i'm sorry i wiggled your skinny boyfriend like a sheet of metal. weeop womp weeoop womp weeeoop womp

#eebieposting #ok to rb #originally posted about silver spoon inanimate insanity

[crabussy]

#poll #tumblr poll #rice #CURIOUS ^_^ I use chopsticks most of the time #sometimes spoon though

[mcnostril]

There is a cool and popular tweet about Samus Aran microwaving spoons but we could not find it so I had to reconstruct it from memory*

*I have never seen the thing in question so I had to invent a memory first.

#metroid #spoons #metroid fusion #geddit?

[sp00ntaneous]

'Snake' wooden spoon carved in Sapele wood.

#woodworking #spoontaneous #woodenspoon #wood #design #carving #craft #art #sculpture #spoon

[plounce]

this weekend at my job this trio of kids were coming up to me throughout the day begging me to look at a rusty spoon they had found in the creek by the dining hall because it was rusty and had some detailing and they were convinced it's an antique and i should put it in our nature museum. and every time i was either busy or they didnt have the spoon so i never saw it. but like. it's a spoon someone threw into the creek from the dining hall. finally at dinner im eating my pasta and having a bit of a break when the little trio comes up to me with the spoon and it sure is a tarnished rusty spoon. and im like "yeah ill look it over and ill let you know later!!" already thinking of ways to nicely tell them this is regular silverware from 2003. but then i look at the back and google the branding on the back and. those kids legit found a silver spoon from 1922. guess i gotta put it in the museum

#chirps #apparently the previous owner of the land used that particular spot as a dumping ground. the recent heavy snow mustve unearthed this spoon

[transjudas]

Frances Bean Cobain on the 30th anniversary of her father, Kurt’s, death.

#frances bean cobain #kurt cobain #i’m sorry i don’t have the spoons to id all this rn but if anyone can i will reblog it!

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[spoonmoment119]

i love the life series i wish gay people were real....

#spoon doodles #life series #third life #3rd life #last life #double life #limited life #secret life #grian #gtws #goodtimeswithscar #mumbo jumbo #jimmy solidarity #joel smallishbeans #scott smajor #impulsesv #skizzleman #tangotek #etho #ethoslab #bdoubleo #zombiecleo #martyn inthelittlewood #inthelittlewood #renthedog #rendog #ldshadowlady #bigbstatz #geminitay #pearlescentmoon

[steadfastpetrel]

the sun mourns in vain for the white-throated rail: a comic about disability and the unwanted able-bodied grief for past selves.

[IMAGE DESCRIPTION:

Page 1: The sun holds a white-throated rail, a bird with a red head, a gray body, and a white throat, in its hands. The sun speaks in a tone represented as sorrowful pity through a drippy speech bubble.

Sun: Looking at you makes me sad!

Rail: What?

Page 2:

Sun: Looking at you makes me sad!

The sun stands with a hand clutching its face.

Sun: How miserable it must be to be flightless! Don’t you yearn for the skies? Don’t you wake up grieving you’re still on land?

Page 3: The white-throated rail looks down in frustration in the hand of the sun.

Sun: (speaking off screen) I’d simply perish if I were you!

The rail speaks, looking down. Pink flowers bloom towards the bottom of the page, petals and pollen blowing in the wind.

Rail: Why do you put your words in my beak and your grief in my feathers? Am I not beautiful?

Page 4: The bone of a white-throated rail is positioned against a colorful galaxy dotted with flecks of stars.

Rail: Am I not adaptability in action? Am I not evolution in motion? Do you mourn the days you weren’t a star? Do you mourn when the sky was cold, how unbearably hot you must burn to keep embracing it every day?

Page 5: The sun looks at the viewer.

Sun: Why would I? That was then, this is now. I am content to be in this state.

Page 6: The rail looks up at the sun off-screen.

Rail: Well…So am I.

#disability #disability comic #disability poetry #fibromyalgia #spoonie #spoon theory #ableism #poetry #comic #comics #visual poetry #cripple punk #chronic illness

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

*Sees someone on twitter arguing that DoorDash is necessary for the disabled because microwave food is too much to handle.*

...What. That seems absurdly specific.

There are a lot of reasons someone might not be able to microwave food. "I literally cannot get out of bed", "i need nutrients you can't just microwave", "my dumb brain has put up 18 billion barriers to try and stop me from eating and this is the loophole I have" "the microwave in this apartment is out of reach/not labeled properly/not ADA friendly in another way" "for x or y reason microwave food is a one way ticket to severe burns", etc. I found a lot of reasons someone might need DoorDash and I also found this cool article about food sharing in the disabled community and how the author had to rely on an abusive partner once because she was either in bed or barely able to crawl and they were among the few people bringing food.

Just saying, there's a reason disabled people have higher chances of food insecurity and there's a reason meal trains, meals on wheels, and other programs focus on bringing food to people in need and not just assuming "they have a microwave and money, why bother?". Sometimes you don't have a family or friends or mutual aid group to bring you meals when you can't even pop something in the microwave.

#disability #cooking #low spoons food