#and this is entirely separate from the toxic productivity that so many of us have a history of trauma about

[aibidil]

“Doing is Being,” Ray Bradbury

[Image ID: A poem by Ray Bradbury titled “Doing is Being.” Doing is being. / To have done is not enough; / To stuff yourself with doing—that’s the game. / To name yourself each hour by what’s done, / To tabulate your time at sunset’s gun / And find yourself in acts / You could not know before the facts / You wooed from secret self, which much needs wooing, / So doing brings it out, / Kills doubt by simply jumping, rushing, running / Forth to be / The new-discovered me. / To not do is to die, / Or lie about and lie about the things / You just might do some day. / Away with that! / Tomorrow empty stays / If no man plays it into being / With his motioned way of seeing. / Let your body lead your mind— / Blood the guide dog to the blind; / So then practice and rehearse / To find heart-soul’s universe, / Knowing that by moving/seeing / Proves for all time: Doing’s being! End ID]

#ray bradbury #doing is being #what I love about this that might not be clear from the poem alone #but is clear in the context of the book this is in #is that he’s not talking about capitalist productivity #he’s talking about honoring the creative authentic self #and it’s true imo that creative people #(and aren’t we all creative people?) #will wither if we can’t create and make things into the world #But what’s key to me is #that doesn’t have to be writing #creation is cooking or knitting or making something in your home #teaching someone something they need to know #organizing something to solve a problem #making art #making music #making words #our creative selves need to find expression #and this is entirely separate from the toxic productivity that so many of us have a history of trauma about #this isn’t about money #it’s about soul

[rosesloveletters]

The Flowers You Gave Me.

Pairing: 1971 Willy Wonka x Reader

Word Count: 3,080

Warnings: no major content warnings apply.

Summary: Reader has a food allergy/intolerance and has to carefully monitor everything that they consume. They are unable to eat anything inside of Wonka's original Chocolate Room and, therefore, he takes it upon himself to create an entirely separate Chocolate Room for their enjoyment and pleasure with foods which are completely safe for them to eat and free from any cross-contamination.

Author's Note: this fic is incredibly special to me, as Wonka's Chocolate Room is my absolute FAVORITE room inside his factory, but I would likely be able to eat almost nothing in there. At least, the chocolate would be off limits to me. I like to think Wonka would want everyone to be able to enjoy his chocolate and sweets, regardless of allergies and/or intolerances and, as we all know quite well, he goes above and beyond with extravagance.

Edited.

divider created by @/saradika on Tumblr.

The chocolate factory was a symphony of sights, sounds and smells.

The aroma of melted chocolate that filled the air was impossible to resist. Its rich, saccharine scent was intoxicating and sensual, making your mouth water in anticipation of the delicious treats that lied ahead. The sound of machines grinding and churning echoed in hypnotic rhythm throughout the halls while the incandescent lights shone down in poor, artificial substitution for real sunlight. 

Anyone else might have run off to taste-test as much product as they could get their hands on, but you had to be vigilant of everything you put into your mouth, scrutinize every ingredient to make absolute certain that there was nothing used in the production of what you were about to eat that could potentially make you sick. 

You were a bit resentful that you could not simply indulge in whatever you pleased, but this was your reality and you chose to make the best of it rather than let it control you. 

“I still don’t understand why you won’t just tell me what new product you’ve made, Willy,” your voice was terse, strained as if it pained you to remain cordial when he unwittingly teased you with treats you would not be able to sample, “why do I have to see it?”

It was not his fault, you reminded yourself. He knew your system could not tolerate certain foods, yet it was still understandable that time to time he might forget, although it was unlikely, considering his high intelligence, attention to detail and information retention. 

It was not that you were disinterested in his work; you wanted to share his excitement, but you could only do so much. 

You couldn’t taste anything inside of the chocolate factory until he gave you the ‘all clear’. You had to have confirmation and extensive reassurance that you were not ingesting anything toxic to your system and that nothing you put into your body was contaminated in any way. It was of the utmost importance that Wonka took the necessary steps and food safety precautions before offering you anything to eat. 

“Because to believe is to see, my dear, and you believe in me, do you not?” the smart curve of his lips as he smirked at you and the twinkle in his eyes betrayed little, but you felt like he was tempting you despite his words not making much sense, “I can see the worry lines forming, but please don’t be alarmed. You have tried so many of my creations and I haven’t poisoned you yet.” 

His words were meant to be comforting, but the added ‘yet’ at the end of his sentence filled you with apprehension. You knew that Willy would never intentionally give you something that would make you sick. He was not that cruel or uncaring. His words were playful and innocent and meant only to calm you down.  

Your cheeks were warm with embarrassment as you followed along beside him, however he stayed a pace or two ahead, traveling at a rather brisk clip. 

“I know. You’re right and I didn’t mean to imply that you would do something like that,” you tried to explain yourself, but Willy did not want to hear it. 

He held his hand up to silence you long enough for him to interject, “no need to explain anything away. I understand your concern, my dear, and am very sympathetic to your condition. Nevertheless, I simply must show you this.”

There was no getting around it. Whatever it was that Willy Wonka had to share, he was going to show it to you. At this point, your curiosity was starting to get the best of you and you increased your pace to keep up with him as he led you down a long hallway that you had never been on before.  

You were in the wing of the factory which housed Wonka’s beloved Chocolate Room. 

The sweet fragrance of melted chocolate wafted into your nostrils and you could practically taste it on your tongue. 

There was a lot which was unsafe for you to eat inside that room and it piqued your curiosity of why he would bring you to this part of the factory, but you remained silent as he led you on down the hall. 

Willy stopped in front of a door not unlike the one which led to the Chocolate Room. The wood itself was the same rich brown, carved to resemble a chocolate bar, except this one had an intricate gold inlay to set it apart from the others and indicate a very clear distinction between this room and the Chocolate Room. 

You would have noticed this door if you had chosen not to avoid this part of the factory and now as you stood outside the wonders held within the room beyond, you could not help yourself from asking, “what are we doing here?”  

He did not answer your question, but there was a knowing look in his eyes and that was one which you were highly familiar with. 

Willy Wonka was always up to something, but whether you wanted to know what it was were you uncertain. He had a penchant for hijinks and was known for being a bit of a trickster; you never quite knew if you could trust what he was saying or doing. He had created an aura of mystery and crafted the illusion that things happened inside the factory that were beyond his control, but you knew better. You had wised up to his antics and knew that nothing that happened here was without his approval, knowledge or doing. He was very much in control of what went on inside of his chocolate factory, regardless of what he might have let others believe.

His laissez-faire attitude added to the magic, but it was all a façade; this was his chocolate factory and he was the mastermind. 

“This is my most recent masterpiece,” he informed you, “the latest and greatest in chocolate confectionery that was as much of a challenge as it was a labor of love and artistry.”

He was proud of what he had created here, that was for certain. He was often humble about his work, even though you would have sung his praises to the moon and beyond. 

You did not know what to expect and so you eagerly awaited the unveiling with bated breath and hoped that whatever lied behind that door was edible and safe for you to consume. 

Wonka practically read your thoughts, “don’t get over-excited, my dear. Take it all in stride and appreciate what considerable effort went into it.”

His overreaching statements were as wild in sentiment as his hair was in texture and volume. 

You watched with wonder as one of the panels on the door flipped down to reveal a small piano lock, just like the one he had installed to keep the Chocolate Room off limits and protected. He played a few notes, which had a lower cadence and was played at a considerably slower pace than that of the overture of Mozart’s Marriage of figaro. 

Wonka deftly tapped the keys in smooth succession and you recognized the opening notes of Claude Debussy’s Clair de lune as the door unlocked itself. 

A wave of conscious relaxation washed over you like the calm, undulating ripples of the sun-warmed sea. 

He had wanted to surprise you, but this came as a shock. Clair de lune was your favorite piece and you vaguely recalled telling him this long ago; somehow, he had remembered. 

Willy Wonka didn’t acknowledge your surprise but was grinning from ear to ear as he pushed the door open. 

You remained where you stood, rooted to the spot. 

He had…remembered?

Why did he choose to use such a specific piece for this lock?

What was going on?

You felt like there was some giant secret that everyone was in on except for you, which was often the case with him, even if it would have been merely your perception with anyone else. 

You decided better than to ask him about it, knowing he did not like to be questioned and would therefore make up a silly excuse not to answer. Perhaps it was better that way, to simply enjoy these little surprises for what they were and to not look a gift horse in the mouth. 

A little smile lit up your expression and Wonka glanced over his shoulder to admire the look on your face. 

The soft light in his cornflower eyes made him seem almost ethereal. 

His gaze shifted skyward and his smirk grew.

He refrained from divulging that he had learned Clair de lune in its entirety; perhaps he would share this with you after dinner, when he might idly choose to sit at the piano and play, giving you yet another little surprise like tiny morsels spread throughout the day so that you could have a taste of sweetness each time you had a craving. 

What use was it to devour it all at once, rather than savor everything he had to offer?

Willy Wonka had so many secrets to share, but he wanted to take his time. 

Luckily, you would have willingly spent a lifetime just to learn his name, not to mention everything else in his head, which was an even more beautiful place than any one of the seven wonders of the world. 

Wonka gestured for you to enter, holding the door open for you. 

After you had recovered, your legs felt like jelly, but were steady enough to carry you over the threshold and onto the landing inside the room.

The sight that greeted you was so overwhelming that you did not notice Wonka enter and close the door behind you. 

He was still smiling, his eyes raking over you as he assessed your reaction to determine whether you were pleased. 

You covered your gaping mouth as your eyes were drawn to an array of vibrant colors and abstract shapes, candy-coated woodland scenery inside of a sugar-inducing wonderland.

It was all too reminiscent of his original Chocolate Room, except for the lack of a chocolate waterfall, but you were not about to complain. 

He had brought this vision to life straight out of his storybook mind and everything that your eyes gazed upon was something Wonka had envisioned and created with his own two hands. It was miraculous and beautiful, swirling and twisting delicacies that grew on trees and from the ground like real living plants and flowers. 

Your mouth watered and your stomach rumbled with hunger. You were literally a kid in a candy store; even your actual age couldn’t call you otherwise.��

However, as quickly as your excitement had built, it soon faded twice as fast. 

You could not eat any of it. 

“Oh, Willy…” your voice came out in a soft, halting whine, desperate to fill your mouth and stomach with sweets you knew you could not have, “it’s absolutely gorgeous.”

“It’s for you.”

His words did not resonate with you at first; you did not even acknowledge them.

How could all of this be for you?

You did not understand and Willy did not clarify. 

He took your hand and tucked it under his arm as he led you down the steps and along one of the little paths. The small pathway curved into a small clearing filled with chocolate flowers and giant mushrooms with red licorice caps and frosting-filled spots. Your eyes did not deceive you when you thought you saw the very same edible flower teacups that grew in his original Chocolate Room. They were even the same color!

You bent down to admire them as they blossomed in buttery yellow splendor, a pleasant smile blooming across your features. 

These ones were somewhat different, shimmering as if they had been sprinkled with pixie dust; Wonka’s factory was nothing short of a fairy tale and you wondered what they were made of. 

“Give one a try,” Willy urged you, “I know you’ve always wanted to.”

You opened your mouth to protest, but the glint in Wonka’s eye made you pause. 

What was he not telling you?

You were beginning to put the pieces together and suddenly it clicked in your mind.

“You did all this…for me?”

Wonka nodded humbly, “of course. I can’t have you missing out on any of my confections, now, can I? Everything in this room is safe for you to eat and the only ones who have access to it are a select few Oompa-Loompas I have chosen specifically for their expertise in cross-contamination prevention who have been made aware of your dietary restrictions, you and myself.”

You did not know what to say. No amount of thanks would ever be enough compensation for all the work he had done to provide you with the safety and comfort that everything that you consumed inside this room was perfectly safe for you to eat. You would never have been able to repay such a grand gesture, but Willy did not ask you to. He simply wanted you to be able to enjoy these delicacies despite your restrictions and since he was the most masterful chocolatier in the world, he was more than capable of giving you that. 

“I don’t know what to say…,” but soon, you blurted out, “thank you, Willy!”

Tears pricked your eyes like sharp glass droplets and Willy’s expression softened. He extended his arms, offering you a hug which you gladly accepted. 

His arms enveloped you in a tight embrace and you burrowed in against his chest. He smelled of cocoa and understated tones of autumn earth and candied maple drizzle with brown sugar nectar. 

You inhaled, your head swimming with the intoxicating smell of him as he held you. 

“Are you alright?” he asked softly, craning his neck to look down at you. 

His eyes chased yours as you seemed somewhat afraid to make eye contact with him now; he wanted you to see the gentle look on his face and know that you were always safe here with him.

“Y-Yes,” you stammered, “it’s just…no one has ever gone to so much trouble for me before.”

“What trouble?” he asked with a slight frown on his face, “putting this together for you was a delight.”

“You know what I meant.”

Of course, he did. 

This was a massive undertaking for him alongside his usual work and to keep such a secret right under your nose would have been impossible if he hadn’t been Willy Wonka.

He heard everything that you were trying to say and it warmed his heart that you had such difficulty communicating it to him verbally. It meant more to him to see that satisfaction on your face rather than coming out of your mouth. 

Actions were stronger than words and this you and Wonka agreed upon. 

You gave him another little nuzzle and he patted your back in a comforting gesture. 

“Now, you can have whatever you like with no worry that it might be contaminated,” he assured you, his gentle voice like a sweetly sung melody, “but I don’t want you in here filling your belly unattended. A little bit of sugar goes a long way, so…I suggest we enjoy such things in moderation.”

You nodded, but then a thought came to you, “I think I’m far more at risk for sugar sickness from all your sweet words and kindnesses than from a little chocolate.”

“This isn’t your way of telling me to be unkind to you, is it?”

His teasing lilt made you laugh. 

“Absolutely not!” you replied, chuckling as he let go of you, “and all jokes aside, I really, really appreciate this, Willy. You have no idea…”

“Oh, I do,” he laughed with you.

He bent down and plucked one of the flower teacups and passed it to you, which you gratefully took from him. 

It was true; you had been longing to take a bite out of one of these since you had laid eyes on them, but thought it was never meant to be. Now, holding one in your hands, you were faced with the very real idea that you were as much a part of Wonka’s world as he was. 

You were as important to him as the cocoa bean was to the creation of chocolate. 

Everything that he did was now done with you in mind. 

It had taken some time to get to this point with him, but every step you took was another one which kept you by his side and you were ready and willing to carry on like this with him for the rest of your life. You wanted to coexist with him, to enjoy this wonderful world of candy that only he could create and now your fears seemed so far away.

Fear that had once convinced you that your limitations might cause resentment. 

Willy Wonka wanted you to know that no matter whether you could eat all his chocolate or none of it, that it did not determine how he felt about you. 

You were what was special and important to him and your impediments were not a disincentive. 

He would find a way around those because you deserved as much consideration and care as anyone else and he was determined to show you that. 

Willy knew how much it bothered you that you couldn’t just eat without worry and therefore he also knew just how much this meant to you that he cared enough for you that he would spend his free time putting together a Chocolate Room specifically designed to cater to your dietary needs and restrictions. 

He knew all this, and more, as he watched you take your first bite of the yellow flower teacup that had caught your fancy so much time ago. 

Your face twisted in delight and you hummed appreciatively as the taste of sweet crystal cream coated your taste buds. 

Knowing that he had finally been able to give you a gift that allowed you to enjoy his sweets uninhibited filled him with joy and even though he also knew you would be thanking him until the end of time, you didn’t need to. 

He had done this for no other reason than for your own enjoyment and pleasure and he knew how much you appreciated him. 

He knew more than you ever would have thought.  

Willy Wonka even knew that you loved him. 

#willy wonka #willy wonka and the chocolate factory #willy wonka 1971 #wilder!wonka #wwatcf #willy wonka x reader #willy wonka x you #willy wonka imagine #willy wonka and the chocolate factory imagine #gene wilder #biblio :: 📖

[uglynicc]

Listen, I avoided this movie for AGES thinking it fit into the Bro Movie Torture P0rn™️ genre which really isn't my thing, but after going down a rabbit hole of video esays and analysis, I decided to watch it.

And I actually loved it. There is SO MUCH commentary about this movie but I enjoyed it enough to dive into my own analysis of it lol, even if it's one that's been done before.

The book does sound like it's a bit too gruesome for me (plus the author's comments about "women can't make movies" definitely rubs me the wrong way), but only going off the movie I am blown away how some toxic trolls out there entirely miss the point and unironically idolize Bateman.

Firstly, I interpreted this as a comedy, a real dark satirical one, and I laughed a LOT.

Second, I do think the murders are in his head. I know there's room for commentary about The Rich And Elite Being Able to Literally Get Away With Murder, but I'm fairly certain someone would, at the very least, complain about a naked man running through an apartment complex with a chainsaw after a screaming woman. All the little hints that a lot of events didn't happen also lead me to think this.

I think he's still a D Bag who abuses sex workers, but that the killing was either a fantasy to give himself a sense of power, control, and greater agency in his life, or that it is a product of untreated and worsening mental state.

Ignoring his potential neurodivergency/mental illness here purely for the fact I think it's a separate interpretation from the one I have, and focusing on the idea that he's getting lost in the dark fantasy world he's constructed, my greatest takeaway from the movie:

Bateman is a loser.

Yes, he's wealthy and attractive, but what does he actually have going for him, even in his shallow little group of elite toxic fuckwads?

For his inflated sense of importance, no one gets his name right or even remembers who he is most times. His fiance doesn't respect or even like him, and he doesn't like her either. He pays women to be part of fantasies where he is awe inspiring, a rich, muscular sex god, and even they are bored and unimpressed, they can't even act like he's worthy of their admiration. His male peers don't think he's anything great either, and how could they when they're constantly wrapped up in meaningless pissing contests. He's so insecure in his masculinity he is close to tears when someone mistakes him as being homosexual. He can't even buy his way into Dorsia, can't use his good looks or cash, the only things he has going for him, to get a dinner reservation at his White Whale restaurant.

He's failing to achieve anything even in his shallow little world, so his Wall Street job (with a business card no one thinks is particularly great), fancy apartment (which he grudgingly admits isn't even as nice or as expensive as his rival's) and chiseled good looks mean nothing. He craves status and recognition, which he fails to achieve.

And yeah, he's a misogynist, racist, classist, homophobic dishrag too, can't forget that.

He's the archetype of toxic, impotent-with-misplaced-rage, insecure yet inflated male ego we see everywhere. If people don't perceive what Bateman feels is his inherent "greatness" or "importance," he lashes out, through mistreatment of those more vulnerable, and/or through dark fantasies which give him that sense of greatness and importance.

It's almost too real, because there are so many real world examples of this kind of privileged dickwad (which makes it even more baffling when these same real world dickwads put Bateman on a weird pedestal thinking he's actually great), but I loved the way the movie examined it. I don't think it's celebrating Bateman or men like him at all, I felt more compelled to laugh at him as a figure of jest, a ridiculous caricature of entitlement and failure. Hell, even his "confession" falls flat, he can't even get that right.

Anyway, just my musings after my first viewing, 20 some years late to the party lol.

#american psycho #american psycho movie #don't come for me #patrick bateman #movie analysis #kitchen sink rambles #long post #also it was super tame compared to movies I've seen recently like Barbarian

[hussyknee]

Twitter feels like an even split between pro-Palestine supporters and the most horrific kind of racists, Zionists and white supremacists. Tumblr is by comparison overwhelmingly in support of Palestine. And yet the level of dehumanization, isolation, Othering and casual racism on here is so much more unbearable and suffocating than Twitter could ever be.

Tumblr wants to be seen as the anti-racist good guys on the right side of history while reinforcing the racist white supremacist western-centric status quo. Black and brown people are given platform under strict conditions of what values can be challenged and how far white comfort can be pushed. It's on Twitter that we have our own communities, our own power of advocacy, and a collective drive to interrogate and dismantle structures of power.

It reinforces what I have known for a long time— Tumblr's hatred of Twitter and TikTok is based primarily on refusing to tolerate the reality of equal representation, leftist action and racial justice. A true diversity of power and perspectives is messy, chaotic, conflict-driven and upends the sense of stability and space that can only come with a homogeneity of racial demographic. The majority of disenfranchised people understands that power structures and bureaucracies are built on purpose to exclude them — the poor, the sex workers, the incarcerated, the ghettoised, the disabled, the colonized. We have to fight to be heard, and our reality and political investment cannot be separated from the minority trauma that informs them. True equality entails not having to funnel that trauma through behaviour and ethics that makes their expression more palatable or considering of others; it removes all respectability politics and allows us to behave with the same unpunished toxicity that is unleashed on us by white and western people. Conflict, cacophony and having to tolerate the untempered emotions and self-interest of all groups is the price of true diversity and honest dialogue. It also primarily empowers Black and brown people and disempowers whites. In contrast, the "Diversity, Equity and Inclusion" on predominantly white-driven and Western-oriented spaces is a simply a neoliberal farce that requires us to perform our own humanity and ask validation from whiteness. This is why you see only the worst aspects and negative effects of Twitter and TikTok and use them to reject the the platforms wholesale while creating a narrative of moral superiority around Tumblr's relatively low levels of conflict and glossing over the receding presence of Black and brown people in its userbase.

Race is not a layer of oppression. It's the fundamental bisection that creates the underclass on which the colonial capitalist world order is built. It's the caste hierarchy of humanity; who gets to be labourer and profiteer, the exploiter and exploited, the worker and producer, the consumer and consumed, the masses and the individual. The living bodies and embodied lives. The experience of every other marginalization is shaped by its waters. White women and queers will neither understand nor share in the oppression of women and QPoC from both diasporas and the Global South. Even further, every marginalization becomes a weapon against BIPOC in the hands of its white demographic. Black and brown people of those marginalized communities will always only be a token and shield for their white counterparts, while being the workhorses behind their struggles.

It doesn't matter how many times you post "Free Palestine" when we know its only the product of your preoccupation with your own personal moral landscape. Politics based on egoism will always be eclipsed by threats to your material reality. This is why a userbase that spent its entire existence grandstanding against Nazis now cannot see Zionists as Nazis and begs people to participate in a political establishment that has revealed itself to be a genocidal white supremacist regime in the clearest possible terms. Fascism against its own enfranchised is the end stage of an empire that has begun to collapse under the weight of its war-mongering and now resorts to eating itself to survive. No amount of moral distance between yourselves and its machinery of death, no amount of scapegoating the lives crushed underneath it, will stop the roofs you sheltered under falling on top of you. This the truth that the colonized, enslaved and indentured people that built your house have lived all along.

#tumblr culture #twitter #tumblr wank #tiktok #white supremacy #racism #anti-blackness #islamophobia #antisemitism #anti zionism #usamerican imperialism #western imperialism #colonization #colonialism #free palestine #diversity and inclusion #respectability politics #global south #coloniality #genocide #war crimes #knee of huss

[redjadethewriter]

"You're Brave To Choose 'Not' To Forgive"

While watching an ex-therapist discuss the concept of forgiveness, their perspective intrigued me. They argued that forgiveness can sometimes serve as a way to dissociate from our true feelings. It was a refreshing take, as we often hear phrases like “You need to find forgiveness in your perpetrator” or “You’re brave for being so forgiving.” However, I believe there is a distinction between apologizing for our actions and genuinely working on personal growth and emotional maturity.

Apologizing involves taking accountability for the harm we have caused and actively striving to become a better person. It requires self-reflection and understanding of the root causes of our destructive actions. It is not about seeking forgiveness solely to repair relationships or improve our image in the eyes of others.

In the past, I apologized with the expectation of forgiveness, without truly learning from my mistakes. I yearned to have that person back in my life or to enhance my reputation, rather than sincerely addressing the underlying issues that led to my harmful behavior. I now realize that I needed to take responsibility for my actions and focus on personal growth, rather than seeking forgiveness as a means to move on.

It is essential to delve into the reasons behind our uncontrollable emotions and the destructive actions they may trigger. By understanding the root of these issues, we can work towards genuine personal growth and emotional healing.

The guy spoke about his decision not to forgive his parents, explaining how it saved his life. This choice helped him grieve, reconnect with his emotions, and ultimately recover from his trauma. I can completely understand why he needed to do that, and it made me reflect on my own experiences. Why did we spend so many years constantly forgiving those who hurt us the most? In his case, he had to forgive his parents because he depended on them. He talked about feeling trapped, having nowhere else to go, lacking the financial means to leave, and being too inexperienced to navigate life on his own. It’s devastating when forgiveness becomes the only option, leading to dissociation and enduring constant issues, all while trying to cope with the trauma of being stuck with the very people who caused it.

I have spoken to many people in my life who describe feeling like orphans, despite having parents. These individuals have endured neglect, deficient parenting, and various forms of abuse. Some of them even argue that certain individuals should never become parents in the first place. I deeply admire those who openly admit that they do not want to have children to spare them from inheriting or experiencing trauma. It shows their recognition of the flaws within the current system.

Occasionally, my mother has expressed her wish that she had never been born when overwhelmed by life’s challenges. It’s an unsettling sentiment, but it’s a rare occasion where we find common ground. These conversations may not be healthy, but then again, mentally or emotionally healthy individuals did not raise us, nor did we grow up in a safe environment.

I even had to tell my mother that she doesn’t have to forgive anyone, but she should acknowledge that our entire bloodline is dysfunctional. This dysfunction stems from centuries of accumulated issues and challenges. However, it doesn’t mean that we must subject ourselves to toxicity any longer. Instead, let’s wish them well and distance ourselves from the negativity.

Of course, there are some individuals who choose to believe in forgiveness as a virtue and expose themselves to a lot of nonsense, even when they have the means to separate themselves from it. On the other hand, there are those of us who don’t have that luxury and must find a way to survive by any means necessary.

As for me, I cannot bring myself to forgive anyone for their actions. I simply acknowledge that we are all products of the accumulated nonsense that has plagued our bloodline and society. However, it is crucial that actions are held accountable and not excused.

I once had a friend who desired her parents to take responsibility for their actions. I had to explain to her it’s highly unlikely that she will ever receive that accountability from them, and the same may be true for the rest of us. The individuals who have caused harm would first have to acknowledge to themselves that they have done something truly terrible that has hurt us. Unfortunately, I doubt their ego will allow them to do so, as it would mean they would have to confront their own flaws and potentially view themselves as less than good people, especially if they hold that belief about themselves.

Hence, I concur that forgiveness may not be the most effective approach in life. As he remarked, “It’s courageous of you to choose not to forgive,” and I fully agree. This is true when you have been raised to believe that forgiveness is an empowering act, when in reality, I have never experienced a sense of empowerment or liberation when uttering the words, “I forgive you.” Instead, I would much prefer to witness individuals taking proactive steps to improve themselves as human beings, without expecting my forgiveness. Merely recognizing their struggles and acknowledging that they have personal issues to overcome would suffice.

Thank you!

#lgbt author #lgbtq community #life blogging #writers on tumblr #healing journey #healing from trauma #healing from abuse #bad parenting #generational trauma #family drama #walking away

[outrunningthedark]

Their timing to finally decide on separating them is not my only problem. It's the act of separating them that gives me chagrin the most. It's probably me not knowing much shows, but we haven't had any good same-sex slow burn in a while and with how much of it lines up pretty well instead of adapting their story so that it can happen they... decided to make their spinoff a fanfic of this show (not just Buddie, but everything else about LS is OG fanfic). I remember someone said "They wouldn't waste a huge amount of production cost dedicated to Buck and Eddie's scenes to make them not canon in the end" but guess what? I guess those production costs are wasted after all. Not so much waste as they could lure a viewerbase out of it given their intentions are in a confusing scale of "we know what we're doing" and "very unintended," but you get the gist.

"There are other shows" but how many will have a good slowburn for same-sex couples? I understand it's more of me mourning the idea of a storyline, but it's still disheartening all the same. Sorry for being very bitter on your ask, but I don't really know where else to go.

I agree with you about Buddie not being treated like a legit slow burn, many of us do (separation is not part of the formula) and I actually put out this post that's making the rounds in my notifs which summarizes how we looked like we were starting the process in s3 and then there was backtracking to be done. I don't recall the production comment you mentioned (Maybe I blocked it out. I'm sure it came from one of the "You don't understand long form storytelling" folks.) but that sure does feel like a silly thing to say! For one, there are scenes the show spends enough time (and money) on that never see the light of day - the girl who reappeared in 5x10 after her entire arc was cut from Ghost Stories, Lucy's scenes from 5B, for ex. - and two, they're not "wasting" anything if they interpret Buddie scenes one way and allow us to think differently. How would depicting two men with a close relationship that rejects toxic masculinity be a "waste" of production? 🤔 Sounds like someone wanted to convince themselves as much as everyone else. Same-sex/queer slow burns (to reiterate: not what the show has done) are an anomaly, and I think part of it could be that The Powers That Be want their audience to know they've found one piece of media where "baiting" does not apply. (I think about the NCIS franchise and how the Hawai'i installment wrote Lucy & Kate as love interests in the pilot.) People (understandably) are just. Tired. Tired of being strung along, tired of waiting for confirmation, tired of wondering if the gays will ever get to be happy. They *welcome* pre or quickly established relationships because they *know* they'll have something to look forward to with every episode.

#anonymous #tina speaks #tv: 911 #tv: 9-1-1 #buddie

[allthingsfoodsystems]

Industrialized Agriculture - Crop Production Pt. 2

Almost every aspect of industrialized farming lends itself to environmental degradation or global warming in some way or another, but there are some key aspects that have been previously mentioned that must be examined further in order to truly understand the cost of this system. First, monocultures. The development of global food trade paired with the consolidation of food production in America has led to farms that produce incredibly large amounts of just a few crops, usually corn, soy, oats. Hundreds of thousands of acres of land are planted with just one crop – hence the monoculture – year after year. Given that certain kinds of plants require certain kinds of nutrients, repeatedly planting the same crop in the same soil doesn’t allow the soil to replenish these nutrients, and instead depletes the soil entirely, turning it to dirt. As the soil loses its nutrients, industrial farmers try to make up for the loss with the ever-increasing use of fertilizers. These fertilizers are frequently applied in too great a volume, and without very much precision, which leads to runoff into waterways that cause dead zones. Repeatedly planting the same crop in one area also acts as a sort of invitation for pests that favor that crop, as they learn where it will consistently be planted. Since pests reduce crop yield they must be dealt with, and so synthetic chemical pesticides, and GMOs, are introduced into the system. 

Crops are genetically modified to be resistant to pesticides so that they can be sprayed with chemicals without it affecting their yield, but, with time pests also become resistant to the chemicals. Once the pesticides are no longer effective against the stronger pests, even stronger pesticides are introduced to the system and more genetic modifications are made to the plants, and the cycle continues. This cycle is damaging to the environment, and to us, in many ways. Synthetic chemical pesticides can cause illness – cancer, brain and nervous system damage, infertility, etc. – to the farmers who have to spray them and to the people who eventually consume the crops that they are sprayed on; not to mention that they are toxic to many plants and animals – like birds, fish, and beneficial insects – that come into contact with them in the fields and through runoff. Ultimately, all of these farming methods are so quickly depleting and destroying the environment that our soil and water systems are unable to replenish themselves. The complete and utter disregard for this incredibly important boundary of regeneration, and for the overall health of the environment is emblematic of a much larger ethical problem: the capitalistic consumer mindset that devalues the environment and its inhabitants. 

Nancy Fraser, an American philosopher, critical theorist, feminist, and author discusses the capitalist and neoliberal mindset as it relates to climate politics in her essay, Climates of Capital, A Trans-Environmental Eco-Socialism. Fraser begins with an in-depth discussion of Capitalism as it relates to the environment, the economy, and to people. She proposes that our capitalist society constructs nature as a realm of stuff separate from us that lacks inherent value and can only be made valuable by its usefulness to our economy, more specifically to the production of capital. As if this were not enough of a problem in and of itself, “capital commands accumulation without end. The effect is to incentivize owners bent on maximizing profits to commandeer nature’s gift as cheaply as possible, while also absolving them of any obligation to replenish what they take and repair what they damage” (100). Fraser argues that this unsustainable and unethical mindset must be scorned in order for human beings to move in the direction of healing ourselves, our systems, and our environment. It becomes harder and harder to disagree with her and turn a blind eye to the way we are treating our planet when we look at industrial agriculture, which so unabashedly maims the earth.   

[strangecloud]

I've been feeling very disillusioned with technology for a while now, and I'd like to explore why.

Believe it or not, I've always been kind of a Luddite. That might sound weird coming from a computer nerd, but I'm a computer guy first and foremost. I've been using them as long as I can remember and I even got pretty good at operating computers, going as far as tinkering and assembling some myself (which admittedly isn't that hard, but it is an uncommon skill)

Regardless of how much of a nerd I am, the level of tech in my life has always been significantly behind the curve. My components are a few generations old at best. I've been using the same phone for half a decade. I grew up gaming on a PlayStation 2 when most of the world had moved to the 7th gen. I'm about as far from cutting edge as you can be without just not caring about tech at all.

What disappoints me about technology is that it doesn't look like it's meant to make life easier for people. It's meant to exploit them.

There's not really any good reason why everything should have glitchy, unresponsive and poorly put together apps nowadays. "Smart" tech has always been smoke and mirrors driven by marketers trying to sell things nobody really needs. All these home gadgets are just as reliable and useful as the goddamn Juicero, the difference is the marketing on a lot of them is successful.

An over engineered lock on your front door isn't going to stop burglars. No lock ever will. The point of locking your things isn't to make them secure, it's to make the effort of breaking in not really worth it. That smart lock, however, might lock YOU out of your house, as already has happened to one dude from the USA if I'm not mistaken.

We've seen tech bros trying to sell people "phygital" stuff that is just augmented reality DLC powered entirely by marketing. It's not useful and does nothing, the only purpose of it being a vector to suck money out of people who are susceptible to advertising tricks. That's the same thing that drove NFTs, by the way. People being told they were inadequate for not owning a pointless product and deciding to buy it based on the optics and the zeitgeist instead of any practical function. And don't get me wrong, the people buying these things aren't necessarily the problem. I think we as a society have been conditioned to see marketing and conspicuous consumption as such an integral part of life that we have trouble even recognizing we're participating in these toxic behaviors and industries.

I think therein lies the problem. Tech isn't meant to be useful to people. It's meant to be desirable by people and useful to money. This problem manifests itself in many ways, from the theft machines we see in the AI industry, to massive amounts of toxic byproducts released by functional-yet-obsolete e-waste, to the mountain of human suffering that content moderators in big platforms have to endure just so we get pretty cat pictures on our dashboards.

I'm sure this sounds overly pessimistic but I don't think tech can come back from the capitalist event horizon that it has probably already crossed. I think eventually the quality of services and goods on the internet is going to be so bad that it'll not even be worth having it around.

While I have you, STORE YOUR THINGS LOCALLY. Don't trust cloud servers and platforms to keep your things safe for you. If you cannot hold the hard drive containing your videos and images and art and files IN YOUR HAND, it's not safe. Keep at least two separate drives with more than one copy of everything you care about each. Take it from someone who's been on the internet since 2006 and has never lost one byte of data to system formats and hard drive crashes.

#technology #computer stuff #rant post

[recycling101-sy]

Waste Recycling Tips

If you are concerned about the environment and want to help conserve natural resources, you may consider participating in a waste recycling program. A recycling program is a great way to save money while reducing your environmental impact. The first step is to determine which types of waste you generate.                                                                                                                                                            

For example, many household items such as cardboard boxes and toilet paper rolls are recyclable. However, you should always ensure that the items are recycled properly. This is so you can avoid contaminating the entire truckload of recyclables.

Other common recyclables include aluminum soda cans, soda can tabs, and even food cans. These items can be rinsed out in your sink before adding them to your recycle bin. You can also donate these items to your local charity.

Another common recyclable is newspapers. Newspapers should be separated from other types of waste, and placed in a separate recycling bin. Also, be sure to remove any personal information that is on the papers before placing them in the recycle bin.

Recycling can also help you conserve energy and reduce your carbon footprint. Buying products that come in minimal packaging is a good way to start. It can help to find refillable versions of cleaning and personal care products, which can be found at health food stores.

Some people also recycle electronic devices. Electronics are often made of toxic materials, and can bioaccumulate in the soil. Keeping these old devices out of the landfill can help prevent toxins from leaking into groundwater.

Another waste recycling tip is to use reusable containers before discarding them. This can include plastic bags from grocery stores. Be sure to check with your local city to see if there are any rules for recycling plastic bags. Bringing your own bags to the store will ensure that you are not contaminating the recycling system with them.

If you are looking for more ideas, check out this list of common recyclables. Once you have identified the items you are going to recycle, make a list of items you usually use. Next, look for products that are compatible with your local waste recycling program. Whether you are buying groceries or going out for a meal, be sure to bring reusable plastic bags with you to avoid contaminating your recycling bin.

Buying in bulk can be a good way to cut down on your waste. Items such as shampoo bottles and toothbrushes can be refilled and reused. In addition, you can also purchase refillable deodorant and cleaning solutions at health food stores.

In addition to recycling, you can reduce your household's environmental impact by composting. Composting is a great way to fertilize the soil and reduce your landfills. When you are composting, you should be sure to wash all recyclables in your kitchen sink to avoid pests and bacteria.

If you are not comfortable performing your own waste recycling, you can contact your local municipality and arrange for pickup. Many communities will pay you a fee to take your items to a recycling facility.

#Recycling

[pestcontrolperth]

Different Types of Pest Control Methods

If you have a problem with pests in your home, you should know that there are several different types of pest control methods available. These methods can be biological, chemical, cultural, and environmental. It is important to choose the right method for your needs, and to be aware of any potential side effects. Before choosing a pest control method, it is a good idea to learn as much as you can about pests and how to prevent them from becoming a problem in your home.

Biological

Biological pest control, also known as biocontrol, is a method of using living agents to combat pests. There are many benefits associated with biological pest control. This method of pest control can be used for a variety of different applications and has been practiced for over a century. Since its invention, the concepts of biological control have emerged in separate streams within various scientific and taxonomic disciplines. The emergence of an industrial context has led to an increasing interest in biological pest control.

Biological pest control can be achieved through a variety of methods, including importation, augmentation, and conservation. These approaches are constantly being refined and improved to meet current pest management needs. Genetic improvement and improved rearing and release techniques have made augmentation programs more effective, while new ecological theories have made conservation of natural enemies a much more efficient practice.

Chemical

Chemical pest control is the process of using a chemical to control pests on plants and crops. These chemicals are applied to kill pest insects, and they also kill other organisms that can help prevent their reproduction. Many of these chemicals are toxic to humans and the environment, and there are risks associated with using them. In some cases, pesticides can be so toxic that they can cause health risks.

Insecticides are a common form of pest control, and there are many different types available. Different types of insecticides kill different types of insects. Some are granulated, and some are sprayed. Granulated insecticides are particularly useful for dealing with pests that are located in hiding places and feeding areas. They can destroy entire insect populations in a single application. Sprayed insecticides, on the other hand, kill on contact.

Cultural

Cultural pest control is an effective strategy for controlling pests that damage crops. It involves making changes in general production practices and the environment to reduce pest populations. It is a relatively inexpensive method, but it requires long-term preparation and timing. In some cases, cultural control is only effective against specific insect species that are closely related to the crops. Also, some cultural pest control practices can be harmful to aquatic organisms, such as fish, or cause erosion.

Common cultural pest control methods involve modifying the growing conditions of a crop and disrupting the life cycle of a pest. These methods can include tillage, mulching, hand-weeding, trapping, and pruning. Another common cultural pest control method is physical barriers. These include fencing, netting, and scaring devices.

Environmental

Environmental pest control is an important part of maintaining public health and sanitation. It involves the use of organic substances, hazardous chemicals, and other methods for controlling pests. Pest control methods vary greatly, and some are more effective than others. The most common pest control methods include traps, poison, and exclusion. However, it's important to understand that different methods can have different effects on the environment and your home.

Pesticides are very hazardous to the environment and can cause serious illnesses and side effects in humans. Some of the most commonly used weed killers, for example, have been linked to depression and neurological disorders. You should avoid using these chemicals if possible.

Half Price Pest Control will take care of everything your needs in Pest Control Services in Australia. Call our team today to book and Half Price Pest Control will help you to combat these creatures with speed, efficiency and at a cost that is the lowest in the business.

#Cockroach treatment perth #General pest spray perth #Pest control #Rodent control #Pest control services #Pest control near me #Bed bugs control perth #Rodent baiting perth #pest control in perth

[duysuyyyy]

Why Is It Important to Practice Waste Segregation?

Waste is a major issue. According to estimates from the World Bank, the annual global production of solid waste is at 2.01 billion tons. Even with that highly cautious estimate, at least 33% of the trash is not managed in an environmentally responsible way. We no longer have the luxury of ignoring the significance of waste segregation.

The Importance of Waste Segregation

Understanding how to limit your overall trash production, recognize goods that can be reused and set away those that can be recycled is made easier by sorting your waste. But there's more to it than that; you also have a moral obligation to manage your trade waste responsibly. Trade trash will wind up combined in landfills the same way it was mixed in your bins if it is not properly segregated. Food scraps, paper, and liquid waste can combine and decay, releasing toxic gas into the sky and runoff into the soil. Additionally, the legislation expressly forbids the mixing of hazardous trash, or waste containing high concentrations of persistent organic pollutants, with non-hazardous waste or other hazardous waste.

For enterprises, the benefits of proper waste segregation  include:

Increased Recycling Rate: Proper waste segregation can help companies to lower their waste costs as different types of waste have different disposal methods.

Potential Revenue Streams: By sorting your waste, you can find valuable items like metals, cardboard, and plastics and sell them to get the best refund value.

Reduced Landfill Impact: By segregating your waste, your company can recycle more materials and keep them out of landfills. As a result, you have a smaller overall environmental impact.

Waste Categories

Businesses can consult the UK government's instructions on waste categories even though there are numerous classification schemes for trade trash. Here is one of them:

Construction and Demolition Waste

Construction and demolition waste can be further segregated into concrete, cement, bituminous mixtures, and so on.

Vehicle and Oily Waste

This refers to vehicles that have reached the end of their useful lives and all of their parts and consumables, including tires, batteries, and brake pads.

Electrical Equipment

It covers a wide range of things, such as lightbulbs, washing machines, household appliances, and industrial fans.

Dry Mixed Recycling (Packaging Waste and Recyclables)

Dry mixed recycling is a general phrase for a variety of clean recycling garbage that can be readily transformed into other products or their basic components: boxes containers, bottles, and jars.

Healthcare Waste and Related Waste (Hazardous Waste)

It is crucial to appropriately separate medical and clinical waste because of the health and contamination dangers involved, especially during the COVID-19 epidemic.

A person's outer clothing and personal protective equipment (PPE), such as masks, gowns, and gloves, should be clean.

Solid waste collection, transportation, and disposal require a substantial investment in waste management machinery and trucks, as well as the infrastructure necessary for this apparatus to operate efficiently. As a result, the majority of the entire expense for solid waste management goes into the transportation of the material, which can be expensive for many short-haul waste transporters. We offer new garbage trucks, roll-off trucks, trash trucks of all types, containers, trailers, balers, and garbage truck parts. Please contact us here at [email protected]

[nuadox]

Brands are leaning on ‘recycled’ clothes to meet sustainability goals. How are they made? And why is recycling them further so hard?

- By Timo Rissanen , University of Technology Sydney , The Conversation -

Today we make more clothing than ever before. And the driver for this is primarily economic, rather than human need. Over the past decade, the term “circular economy” has entered the fashion industry lexicon, wherein materials are made to be reused and recycled by design.

Yet we haven’t seen the same level of recycling in fashion as we have in other spaces – such as with plastic recycling, for instance. And this is mainly because clothing-to-clothing recycling is much more difficult.

The use of recycled polyester and cotton by brands such as H&M and Cotton On are key aspects of these companies’ sustainability initiatives – but the source of these recycled fibres usually isn’t clothing. Recycled polyester tends to come from plastic bottles, and recycled cotton is usually made from manufacturing waste.

The fact is most clothing is simply not designed to be recycled. Even when it is, the fashion industry lacks the kind of infrastructure needed to really embrace a circular economy model.

Why is recycling clothes difficult?

Recycling clothing isn’t like recycling paper, glass or metal. Clothes are endlessly variable and unpredictable. So they’re not ideal for recycling technologies, which require a steady and consistent source material.

Even a seemingly simple garment may contain multiple materials, with fibre blends such as cotton/polyester and cotton/elastane being common.

Different fibres have different capacities for recycling. Natural fibres such as wool or cotton can be recycled mechanically. In this process the fabric is shredded and re-spun into yarn, from which new fabric can be woven or knitted.

However, the fibres become shorter through the shredding process, resulting in a lower quality yarn and cloth. Recycled cotton is often mixed with virgin cotton to ensure a better quality yarn.

Most fabrics are also dyed with chemicals, which can have implications for recycling. If the original fabric is a mixture of many colours, the new yarn or fabric will likely need bleaching to be dyed a new colour.

A complex garment such as a lined jacket easily contains more than five different materials, as well as trims including buttons and zippers. If the goal of recycling is to arrive at a material as close to the original as possible, all the garment’s components and fibres would first need to be separated.

This requires labour and can be expensive. It’s often easier to shred the garment and turn it into a low-quality product, such as shoddy which is used for insulation.

Industry progress and challenges

Companies such as BlockTexx and Evrnu have developed processes to recycle fibres from blended fabrics, though such recycled fibres aren’t yet widely available.

Through a proprietary technology, BlockTexx separates cellulose (present in both cotton and linen) and polyester from textile and clothing waste for new uses, including in new clothing. And Evrnu has developed a type of lyocell made entirely from textile and clothing waste.

Spain-based company Recover meticulously sorts through different kinds of cotton textile waste to produce high quality, mechanically recycled, cotton fibre.

There’s also biological recycling. Fibre waste from the Rivcott cotton “gin” (or cotton engine) is composted to become fertiliser for a new cotton crop. The same is possible with natural fibres from worn-out clothing, after potentially toxic dyes and chemicals have been eliminated.

Synthetic fibres such as polyester and polyamide (nylon) can also be recycled mechanically and chemically. Chemical recycling through re-polymerisation (where the plastic fibre is melted) is an attractive option, since the quality of the original fibre can be maintained.

In theory it’s possible to use polyester clothing as the source for this. But in practice the source is usually bottles. This is because clothing is usually “contaminated” with other materials such as buttons and zippers, and separating these is too labour intensive.

The plastic problem

Almost all recycled polyester in clothing today comes from recycled plastic bottles, rather than previous polyester clothing. This is significant when you consider polyester accounts for more than 60% of all fibre use.

Given the rapid increase in the production of synthetic fibres, and the as-yet-unknown impact of microplastics (which were documented in human placentas last year) – the question remains whether clothing should be made from biologically incompatible materials at all.

Polyester clothes, regardless of fibre sources, contribute to microplastic pollution by shedding fibres when worn and laundered.

A new generation of synthetic fibres from renewable sources (recyclable and also biodegradable) offers a path forward. For instance, the Kintra fibre is made from corn.

Reduce and reuse before you recycle

There’s plenty of evidence that reducing the consumption of clothing by wearing items longer and buying second-hand is preferable to purchasing recycled fibre clothes.

But even second-hand fashion isn’t without problems when you consider the scale and pace of clothing production today.

Liz Ricketts of the US-based OR Foundation, a charity focused on sustainable fashion, paints a gruesome picture of the Kantamanto market in Ghana, where much of the world’s secondhand clothing ends up (including from Australia).

One path forward is for companies to take responsibility for products at their end of life. US fashion brand Eileen Fisher is a pioneer on this front.

The company has purchased garments back from customers since 2009. These are cleaned and sorted, and mostly resold under the Eileen Fisher Renew brand.

Garments too damaged for resale are given to a dedicated design team, which redesigns them to be sold under the Eileen Fisher Resewn collection. Off-cuts from this process are captured and turned into textiles for further use.

Timo Rissanen, Associate professor, University of Technology Sydney

This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.

--

Read Also

New report: AI in North American fashion market (2019-2027)

#recycling #clothing #plastics #sustainability #environment #ecology #plastic #fashion #waste #textile

[ianthe-is-a-bitch-and-i-love-her]

Flesh, Part 1

Excerpt from Memoirs of a Flesh Eater, never published

Previous Excerpt

Next Excerpt

And now we come to what you’ve all been waiting for, the meat of this book {Editing Note: Boooo}. The gory details, such as they are, of how we acquire our flesh. It’s a topic that’s captured the public imagination for a long time - we’ve all heard plenty of lurid stories and speculation all our lives. I frankly wouldn’t be surprised if you’ve skipped straight to this chapter to finally hear it straight from the monster’s mouth. I’ll do my best to satisfy your curiosity. Understand, though - this topic is deadly serious, and more than almost any other subject I’ve covered, I’m aware of the danger inherent in revealing this. If the information I lay out here compromises these avenues of flesh, people will die for it. I will tell you as much as I can without risking that outcome.

{Editing Note: Everything after this needs strict review, and not just from me. Get as many eyes as possible on this before publishing.}

Nearly every ghoul has or will participate in the direct acquisition of flesh at some point. Finding food is an involved process, and not a particularly scaleable one. There are no factory farms for humans, nor should there be. Truly steady supplies of flesh are rare. Most of our methods involve gathering a small group of ghouls periodically, rather than just one or two of us working continuously. This, unfortunately, causes inconsistencies in supply more often than is comfortable. As such, we’ve had ample opportunity to figure out exactly how much flesh we need to survive. 

For the average mature ghoul, 5 pounds of flesh per day is the ideal consumption rate. Very roughly, we should be eating one adult human body per month for peak health. Put that starkly, it’s a grim picture. Extrapolate from that, and that means each of us is eating 12 humans a year. Obviously, we don’t eat that much from the moment of birth. I remember starting to get hungry more often around age 15, and I can count on one hand the number of ghouls I’ve met over 50, so let’s call the 35 years between those two ages our lifespan. Over the course of our lives, we will each eat over 400 humans. When you look at it from that angle, one life against 400, it’s no wonder that you have, as a whole, decided that we need to die.

But that angle misses some important subtleties. For one, we can handle some remarkably flexible feeding patterns. We can subsist on much less than an ideal diet for a very long time without serious ill effects. For example, I follow a fairly common feeding pattern and only eat half-meals three weeks out of every four. The only ill effects I notice are increased exhaustion and soreness, usually beginning towards the end of the second week and gradually escalating until the fourth. We can also go for multiple days without eating before noticing any ill effects. Many ghouls have only one or two very large meals each week. I personally prefer to have smaller meals more consistently - it makes me feel more human - but it’s a pattern I’ve followed plenty of times when flesh is scarce.

The other main subtlety that the math I presented above misses is that, often, we do not have to kill for flesh. People die all the time from causes that have nothing to do with us, and rarely in ways that make their flesh inedible. We have hardy constitutions and strong stomachs - most diseases and toxic chemicals can be processed and rendered inert in our digestive tracts. There are nearly three million deaths every year in the U.S. alone, the vast majority of which have nothing to do with us. If we could utilize all of that flesh, we could comfortably feed 250,000 ghouls without harming a single person. Obviously that’s never going to happen, but I also doubt there are that many ghouls in the country, so… Suffice to say that there is, theoretically, more than enough ethically-sourced flesh to go around.

Utilizing that flesh, however, is a significant logistical challenge. People aren’t in the habit of donating their bodies for our dining pleasure, and people tend to take the security of their loved ones’ remains pretty seriously. Taking flesh by force, even when we’re not trying to part it from a living body, is difficult, dangerous, messy work, so we prefer to sidestep that wherever possible. This brings us nicely to the first of our three main strategies: farming.

Farming is, unfortunately, our least productive method, but it’s the one that I hope we’ll be able to rely on entirely, some nebulous day in the future. Farming is the practice of discreetly smuggling dead flesh, produced by natural causes, out of the facilities where it is held. This is the only method we use that is sustainable, in the sense that it requires one or two ghouls working constantly and delivering a steady supply, rather than the periodic group efforts I described earlier. This method is also unusual in that it depends on us being integrated in human society, integrated enough to have unsupervised access to dead flesh.

There are two primary sources that we farm. First, there are hospitals. Countless surgical procedures result in the separation of flesh from living humans. Sometimes this flesh is passed along for scientific analysis, but most of it ends up classified as medical waste sooner rather than later. As I’ve said, though, we can safely handle most of the factors that cause limbs to be amputated or organs to be removed. Once these have been marked for disposal, ghouls working at the hospital can usually hide away the flesh for later retrieval without anyone noticing its absence. Unfortunately, caution requires our farmers to take less than is truly salvageable, given how damning it is to be caught stealing flesh. They also avoid taking whole cadavers, which are much more closely observed while in the hospital, and are typically handed over to other people rather than fully disposed of. We also, as a general rule, are careful to avoid eating anything cancerous. Tumors are something of a taboo, only to be eaten in times of extreme famine. We are as vulnerable to cancer as humans are, and there is a strong fear that eating tumors may cause you to absorb some of the cancerous cells into your own body, where they will be free to grow again. I can’t speak to the truth of that, but it’s not a fate I’m interested in tempting.

Our other main farming source is funeral homes. Contrary to popular perception, and to government defence policies, we actually have very little interest in robbing graveyards. By the time bodies go in the ground, they’ve usually been rendered inedible by embalming practices. Given how robust our digestive tracts are, it’s my theory that embalming practices were, at some point in history, specifically designed to protect human bodies from us. Obviously not all bodies are properly embalmed, but there’s no way to tell that without digging one up, and digging up a grave is hard. It is far more beneficial for us to intercept the bodies before they get to that stage. Therefore, we find it very valuable to train as morticians. This allows us to take cuts of flesh before a body is embalmed. Over the years, we’ve figured out exactly how much flesh can be taken and from where without showing at an open casket funeral. For closed caskets, or for cremations, we can take nearly the entire body without detection.

{Editing Note: That’s going to be upsetting for anyone who’s ever buried a family member. I’m not sure how to address that gently. I don’t know how receptive most people would be to “it’s okay that we ate your grandma because it means we got to live long enough to eat other people’s grandmas”.}

Unfortunately, there are a limited number of jobs with access to farmable bodies, and as the number of ghouls in those positions increase, so does the chance of one of them being discovered. Some of you, I’m sure, have seen how paranoid everyone gets when one of us is outed among you. We can’t even come close to fully utilizing these outlets without risking a lot of us dying. My household is fortunate - three of our members are farmers, and we may be gaining a fourth, depending on what degree Scarlet actually settles on. But that supply of farmed flesh is not always enough to feed all of us, and it certainly isn’t enough for Yaga’s charity projects. So about once a month, we send out a group to engage in our second method - gathering.

As I said, there are a lot of deaths that have nothing to do with us. Gathering is our attempt to get ahold of some of those dead before other factors take care of them. Death is, unfortunately, unpredictable, so the best we can do is send people out at irregular intervals to scoop up what we can. A gathering party typically consists of at least half a dozen ghouls; the exact size depends on the amount of ground we want to cover, how many bodies we expect to be transporting, and how worried we are about getting into a violent confrontation. Ideally, no one gets hurt by our gathering parties, but no one is going to look too kindly on body snatching, and sometimes we just attract the wrong kind of attention. If we need an especially large group, or if we intend to cover a particularly large area, we might even reach out to other households for extra help in exchange for a share of our find.

A gathering run typically begins at night, in the poorer parts of the city. I’m sure gathering happens in rural areas, but I can’t speak to their methods. In the city, though, it’s the poor and the homeless and the addicts, the abandoned of human society that are most likely to die somewhere we can get to them. So we put on anonymizing clothing and start looking. Our most reliable leads come from homeless communities and drug sites. Sometimes it’s enough to just show up, make small talk, and look around for the dead or imminently dying. If it’s the latter, sometimes we just wait - keep them company while they wait for the end. Unfortunately for us, people don’t generally die all at once at predictable intervals; it’s not uncommon for us to find no bodies at all. Fortunately, there are some people who are desperate enough to sell us leads. Buying leads is a dangerous game - any person who knows us to be ghouls, even if we take pains to conceal our identities from them, is one more person who could bring the exterminators down on us - and the more effective the method of gathering leads is, the more dangerous it is. The safest thing is to find a stranger and offer them money for a lead, one time deal, and never contact them again. Regular contacts have more opportunities to expose us, whether for exterminator money, moral duty, or just by being careless, but if they know to expect us, they can amass leads, or sometimes even hold bodies for us to buy off them directly. I’ve heard that some households even have arrangements with organized crime to act as free, efficient body disposal.

Once we’ve thoroughly checked these areas, the next step is to check accident sites. Typically we’ll separate to stake out common suicide and accident sites. These aren’t particularly reliable either, but they turn up bodies often enough to be worth staking out once we’ve exhausted our more proactive options. Sometimes, on particularly slow gathering parties, we’ll break out a police scanner and listen for any incident reports likely to produce a body and see if we can get there before the cops. It’s a dangerous game, and often no more lucrative than our other approaches, but there is nothing more depressing or upsetting than coming back from gathering empty handed. Coming home empty handed means we need to take more drastic measures.

I’ve been on around a dozen gathering parties so far. Most of them went well enough, with minimal incident and moderate success. I’ve been on two where we had to chase police scanners. And I’ve been on one that came back empty-handed. That isn’t the only one my household has ever run that came back empty-handed, but it’s the one that stuck out most in my mind because it’s the one time I felt personally responsible for what happened next. When our regular gathering still doesn’t produce enough flesh, we have three options, none of them pleasant. We could all tighten our belts, ration our flesh carefully, and try to endure until we can make up our shortfall. There are a lot of factors that can make this approach unsafe, though. Starving isn’t any more pleasant for us than it is for humans, and it can make us less careful than is safe. Or sometimes someone is injured or sick and wouldn’t be able to handle stricter rationing. Our next option is to organize a gathering raid. There are plenty of hospitals and funeral homes that we can’t farm, for one reason or another, but sometimes we can steal from them. This is a high-risk endeavor, obviously. Anywhere that handles human remains is on the lookout for this kind of thing, and even if we get away clean, the raid will almost certainly make the news and bring exterminators sniffing around. That’s not even touching the fact that, just because we aren’t farming somewhere, that doesn’t mean someone else isn’t. The kind of scrutiny a raid draws can be a death sentence for any ghouls working at the raid target. So, most of the time, Yaga chooses to take our third option. She calls for a Hunt.

{Editing Note: I need to talk to Spatha before I write the rest of this. I need to convince her that I’ll just listen this time, and then I need to actually do that. I don’t know if I can do it. I don’t want to reopen this wound between us. I don’t want to risk our friendship. Is this project really worth that? Do I seriously think it will make a difference?}

#my writing #memoirs of a flesh eater #original fiction #not tlt

[vrishchikawrites]

About YZY leaving YMJ/JFM with her kids Post-WWX Arrival

Dear Dee, feel free to delete or ignore this or post it, whatever floats your boat. This just stuck in my head after those posts and I had to blurt it all to someone. Thanks for taking the time to read my word vomit.

So I had to do this instead of an ask because it got long and I wasn't sure how many asks it'd need or how short I could cut it down without losing parts of the argument. And then other things came up as I was writing and, well.  Well..... >_>;;;; 

But you know, after that post/ask you had about YZY fics saying 'Fuck U' to YMJ/JFM & leaving both with her kids, I had a sarcastic 'yeah right' attitude about it. Mainly due to a lot of negation emotions to such an abusive (and delusional) bitch, partly due to how she wouldn't do that since it doesn't seem to be something her sort of character would consider either because she'd think of it as 'losing' (losing what, IDK, it's why I consider her type of person crazy) or she legit wouldn't think about such a viable action.

But then later, in the shower, I seriously went 'Wait, she can't fucking do that' and it wouldn't be about how MXTX uses her as a part of the narrative but entirely about the/their culture in the novel; the actions that have and would be taken in response; and her entire toxic personality as well.

1) We already know that the sects and the cultivation world in general is sexist, elitist and so Capital T 'Traditional' to the point that it's starting to petrify and any deviancy from this is an exception rather than the norm. YZY might be a madame of a great sect (for what that's worth considering how shit of a madame she's been and the titles she's chosen for herself) but she's still a woman even with her high rank and the things she's personally accomplished.

Even if she was in her rights to leave a 'bad' marriage, she'd be the one who'd get scolded more instead of JFM by her natal family, her former husband's family and by their entire society at large even if she had a few singular supporters. Because That's Not How Things Are Done in their society and I do believe that such a thing was rare even when it was accepted method by the upper echelons. Especially since it would have to be done by more than YZY simply deciding that She Wants Out and just- goes and Gets Out. With no serious allegations that would allow her to divorce or separate from YMJ/JFM without the input from her family, JFM's family and, I think, possibly some measure of compensation as well. And no, having or bringing in a 'bastard child' is not a serious enough offence for such a humongous decision. I think something more along the lines of treason or crimes against multiple, high-ranking parties would be more along the lines. Maybe.

And even if she does this, she'd be considered 'Used Goods' (such a terrible comment) and there'd be no other good/proper marriage prospects for a divorced woman with children let alone a woman like YZY with her entire abrasive personality and attitude put off even easy-going JFM.

(If she'd been widowed then it'd be more forgiven but I consider that a Real Bad End since, IMO, it would lead to the sudden and inevitable decline of YMJ either via mass exodus of disciples and/or residents of LP; being merged with another sect due to it's unstable leadership; or create an internal political war 'cause I bet you anything that the YMJ Elders/relatives (if they have any) Would Not Want YZY in charge of YMJ when she's already proven herself such a shit betrothed let alone madame.)

2) Speaking of families, while YMJ/JFM/LP as a whole might be glad to see YZY's back, I don't think her natal sect, MSY, will be glad to see her come storming back after all the effort they put into getting that particular marriage alliance with YMJ. And if she brings her children with her? Oh man, oh boy- mother or not, that could be considered as kidnapping or line theft (is that a thing?) especially if YZY is also seriously considering divorce proceedings and raising them as Yu and not Jiang. That could give leave to, for anyone more unforgiving and maybe JFM if he's pushed enough, disown both JYL and JWY from the Jiangs through no fault of their own (though I'm sure YZY would make it so as well as blame JFM for her own decisions and mistakes).

Therefore, any inheritance or benefits they might gain for being legitimised children of a great sect are forfeited. JYL will likely lose that betrothal with JZX because JGS will drop it like a hot potato and JWY won't be a sect heir because YZY literally decided to remove that by deciding to raise JWY as a Yu, no matter their blood relation to JFM. They leave him, they leave YMJ and everything attached with it. Which is if YMJ/JFM doesn't demand MSY to give back their heir/ess and to punish YZY for her actions. Or send all three of them back for the appropriate reactions/decisions.

Their society would demand no less in reaction because, to them, it would seem like YZY had gone mad and JFM would look weak (or weaker) and imply that YMJ is vulnerable and exploitable if JFM doesn't do something in response to her actions. That's not even getting into what the other smaller sects may try to do in an attempt to curry favour with YMJ or what LLJ or QSW would try in order to destroy or diminish YMJ. And whether JFM chooses to demand his children back or not, it may not change the fact that this may give him reason enough to choose a nephew or niece to be the new sect heir especially if, even after getting rid of YZY's poisonous influence, JWY grows up to be his mother's child more than his father's or even his own person.

Either way, such a thing would bring great backlash on YZY, and MSY as well as the collateral. No one would want to give face to her or her children because it would bring up some very uncomfortable questions and scenarios to the other sects- specifically, what would happen if the female members of their clans/sets decided to follow the footsteps of YZY and leave with their children and heirs. Especially if they use it as an excuse to leave for their own comfort and whims and not some legitimate wrongs and dangers. That would create some more restrictions on women thanks to YZY

3) And lastly, if any one of those idiot YZY stans think that she'd ever give up the status of being a madame of a great sect they'd be as crazy or crazier than her. YZY is all about status and power and face. Specifically, her status, power and face and how people in her reach reflect her or 'insult' her. She is a selfish, terrible, abusive and toxic person and can only see people in regards to how they would benefit her and the elevation of her and in no other way. Especially her family. They cannot be their own person, they can only be an extension of her and gods forbid they go against her.

We can see this in how she treats the people she supposedly loves. JFM? Arguments day in, day out along with accusations and slander of cheating, having one(1) supposed 'bastard' and being 'in love' with CSSR. Which all seems sus as hell. And that's when she's actually there and not out 'night hunting'. Even her 'training' seems to border on unhelpful rather then helpful if my vague recollections of juniors fainting from exhaustion can be relied upon (please call me out if they're not or find proof).

JYL? Berated by not being 'strong' but not helped at all to be 'strong'. It doesn't help that YZY seems to believe in the same standards strength in their society- that is, of martial masculine strength which does not and should not apply to JYL who has been said to be sickly. Which means h should have been learning a different way of cultivation/fighting anyway.  If that was something she wanted and had been offered in the first place- which I doubt. That isn't even getting into her repeated generational trauma mess of a betrothal which was decided only by those 'sworn sisters', accepted by her as a way out of her terrible home life and puts her squarely within reach of JGS who we know to be a womaniser, rapist, predator and a possible ephebophile considering we don't know the exact age of his youngest 'conquest' or the age of MZY's mother when they met which could be anywhere from 14 to 21.

JWY? Gods, so much meta on him and his(non-) relationships with his parents that I don't think I can contribute more to it. It's been all said and done. Unless people want me to stir the pot by saying that, maybe, just maybe, YZY resents JWY as much as she 'loves' him.Either because he's her son and yet never manages to 'accomplish as much' as WWX or because he's a boy and therefore, more benefits and allowances than a girl/woman- more than anything that YZY ever got without either a fight or screaming at someone about. *shrug*

So, in conclusion to this sudden an unexpected essay that I wrote(I'm so sorry about that, I thought it would be shorter -.-;;;;), YZY leaving YMJ/JFM with her kids? Impossible. Not without some sort of personality transplant or a complete AU. She's too prideful, too bitter, too angry, too everything negative and little positive. She's a resentful product of the values and restraints of her society taken to the extreme negative with a willingness to inflict her pain on others to an abusive degree. But she's also too obsessed and reliant on those same values and restraints to keep up the image of her status. So her? Giving those up? You'd be more likely to see WRH as a doting grandfather than that.

---

Dee - All of this is true and yes YZY leaving YMJ is highly unlikely. While there will be consequences if she decides to leave, she does canonically lives separately from her husband. They seem to be in a situation where they are married but living separately, which was a common way to end a marriage (at least in spirit) back then. She essentially had all the perks of being Madam Jiang but fulfilled none of the responsibilities.

Afaik, her training the Jiang disciples is a donghua thing? I may be wrong but I recall she spent most of her time nighthunting.

As for taking her children along with her- that's completely impossible. At that point, children were the property of the father. She could leave but she would've never been allowed to take JC.

#submission

[itsclydebitches]

RWBY Recaps: Volume 8 “Dark”

Welcome back, everyone! Can you believe it's been six weeks already? I can't. Something something the uncomfortable passage of time during a pandemic as emphasized by a web-series.

But we're here to talk about RWBY the fictional story, not RWBY the cultural icon. At least, we will in a moment. First, I'd like to acknowledge that shaky line between the two, growing blurrier with every volume. A sort of good news, bad news situation.

The bad news — to get that out of the way — is that we cannot easily separate RWBY from its authors and those authors have, sadly, been drawing a lot of negative attention as of late. This isn't anything new, not at all, but I think the unexpectedly long hiatus gave a lot of fans (myself included) the chance to think about Rooster Teeth's failings without getting distracted by their biggest and brightest production. There's a laundry list of problems here — everything from the behavior of voice actors to the quality of their merch — but as a sort of summary issue, I'd like to highlight the reviews that continue to pop up on websites like Glassdoor, detailing the toxic, sexist, crunch-obsessed environment that RT employees are forced to work in. A lot of these websites requires a login to read more than a page of reviews, but you can check out a Twitter thread about it here. 

Now, I want to be clear: I'm not bringing this up as a way to shame anyone enjoying RWBY. This isn't a simplistic claim of, "The authors are Problematic™ and therefore you can't like the stuff they produce." Nor is this meant to be a catch-all excuse for RWBY's problems. If it were, I'd have dropped these recaps years ago. I'm of the belief that audiences maintain the right to both praise and criticize the work they're given, regardless of the context in which that work was produced. At the end of the day, RT has presented RWBY as a finished product and, more than that, presents it as an excellent product, one worth both our emotional investment and our money (whether in the form of paying for a First account, or encouraging us to buy merch, attend cons, etc.) I'll continue to critique RWBY as needed, but I a) wanted fans to be at least peripherally aware of these issues and b) clarify that my use of "RT" in statements like, "I can't believe RT is screwing up this badly" is meant to be a broad, nebulas acknowledgement that someone in the company is screwing up, either creatively (doesn't have the skill to write a good scene) or morally (hasn't created an environment in which other creators are capable of crafting a good scene). The real, inner workings of such companies are mostly a secret to their audiences and thus it's near impossible for someone like me — random fan writing these for fun as a casual side hobby — to accurately point fingers. Hence, broad "RT." I just wanted to clarify that when I use this it's as a necessary placeholder for whoever is actually responsible, not a damnation of the overworked animator breaking down in a bathroom. Heavy stuff, but I thought it was necessary (or at least worthwhile) to acknowledge this issue as we head into the second half of the volume.

Now for the good news: RWBY has reached 100 episodes! For any who may not know, 100 is a pretty significant number in the TV world because, when talking about prime time programming, it guarantees syndicated reruns. Basically, networks don't want audiences to get burned out with a show — changing the channel when it comes on because ugh, I've seen this already, recently too — and 100 episodes allows for a roughly five month run without any repeats, making it very profitable. RWBY is obviously not a television show and doesn't benefit from any of this (hell, modern television doesn't benefit from this as much as it used to, not in the age of streaming), but the 100 episode threshold is still ingrained in American culture. Beyond just being a nice, rounded number, it is historically a measure of huge success and I can't imagine that RT isn't aware of that. Regardless of what we think of RWBY's current quality, this is one hell of a milestone and should be applauded.

All that being said... RWBY's quality is definitely still lacking lol.

Our 100th episode is titled "Dark" — keeping with the one word titles, then — and I'd like to emphasize that, as a 100th episode, it definitely delivers in terms of plot. There's plenty of action, important character beats, and at least one major reveal, everything we'd expect from a milestone and a Part II premiere. The animation also continues to be noteworthy for its beauty, as I found myself admiring many of the screenshots I took for this recap. There are certainly things to praise. The only problem (one we're all familiar with by now) is that these small successes are situated within a narrative that's otherwise falling apart. It's all good stuff... provided you ignore literally everything else surrounding it.

But let's dive into some examples. We open on Qrow starting, awoken by the thunder outside. Robyn has been watching him and makes a peppy comment about how none of them will be sleeping tonight, followed by a more serious, "Sounds bad out there." Yeah, it does sound bad, especially when they all know — thanks to Ruby's message back in Volume 7 — that this is due to Salem's arrival. I think a lot of the fandom has forgotten that little detail because people often discuss Qrow as if he is entirely ignorant of what is going on outside his cell. Even if we were to assume that he's forgotten all about the pesky Salem issue (the horror of Clover's death overriding everything else, perhaps) he still knows that Tyrian is running loose in a heat-less city with a creepy storm going on and, from his perspective, the Very Evil Ironwood is still running the show. So it's bad, which begs the question of why Qrow (and Robyn, for that matter) hasn't displayed an ounce of legitimate worry for everyone he knows out there. Thus far, their interactions have centered entirely around Qrow's misplaced blame and Robyn's terrible attempts to lighten the mood, despite the fact that a war is raging right beyond that wall. It's another example of RWBY's inability to manage tone properly, to say nothing of balancing the multiple concerns any one character should be trying to juggle. Just as it rankles that Ruby and Yang don't seem to care about what has happened to their uncle, Qrow likewise doesn't seem to care about what might be happening to his nieces. When did we reach a point where these relationships are so broken that someone can be arrested/chucked into a deadly battle and the others just... ignore that?

So Robyn's otherwise innocuous comment immediately reminds me of how badly the narrative has treated these conflicts and, sadly, things don't improve much from here. We are thankfully spared more of Robyn's jokes when Qrow realizes that what he's hearing can't be thunder. A second later, Cinder blasts through the wall — called it! — and Qrow instinctively transforms. 

The only downside to this moment is that the whole ceiling falls down on Qrow and the others because APPARENTLY these cells don't have tops on them. Seriously. As far as I can recall we don't see the stone breaking through the forcefield somehow and this looks pretty open to me.

If it is... you're telling me these crazy powerful fighters who practice landing strategies and leap tall buildings in a single bound —

— can't just hop over this mildly high electric fence to get out? Qrow can't just fly away?

We're, like, two minutes in, folks.

We transfer to Nora's perspective as she wakes up, seeing Klein giving her the IV. He tells her not to worry, that "you and your friend are going to be just fine." What friend? Penny? Klein went upstairs prior to Weiss hugging Whitley or Penny crash landing outside. I had thought them bursting through the door with another unconscious friend was the first time he learned what the big bang outside was, but apparently not.

Penny is, obviously, a mess. While I now understand the choice to make her blood such an eye-catching color when that's crucial to the Hound's hunt, I still think it looks strange visually. Like someone has taken a copy of RWBY and painted over it. It doesn't look like it fits the art style. More than that, it implies some rather complicated things about Penny's humanity, especially in a volume focused around her being a "real girl." Real enough for Maiden powers, but with obviously inhuman blood that isn't even referred to as "bleeding." Penny "leaks" instead.

Toss in the fact that she's literally an android who is made up of tech — recall the running gags about her being heavy, or it hurts to fist-bump her, to say nothing of keeping things like multiple blades inside her body — yet Klein says that her "basic anatomy" is the same and he can "stitch up that wound."

I'm sorry, what? Whatever Penny looks like on the inside, it's not going to resemble a human woman's anatomy, and Klein might be able to stitch the outer layer of skin she's got, but that won't do anything to fix whatever metal bits have been broken underneath. Penny isn't a human-robot hybrid, she's a robot with an aura. Penny has knives in her back, rockets in her feet, and a super computer behind her eyes. When our clip introduced that Klein would be the one to help Penny, my initial reaction was, "Seriously? He's a butler and a doctor and an engineer?" But RWBY didn't even try to get away with a Super Klein explanation, they just waved away Penny's very obvious, inhuman anatomy. Yeah, I'm sure "stitching up" an android wound is just like giving Nora her IV. I hope the surgical sutures he used are extra strong!

In an effort to not entirely drag this episode, I do appreciate that Whitley is allowed an "ugh" moment about the non-blood covering his shirt without anyone calling him out on it. That felt like the sort of thing the show would usually try to make a character feel guilty about and I'm glad that, for once, he was just allowed to be frustrated without comment.

Then the power goes out and May calls, which raises questions about what state the CCTS is in and when scrolls are available to our protagonists vs. when they're not. But whatever. She's checking in because she just "saw another bombing run light up the Kingdom" and —

Wait. Bombing? Salem is bombing the city? I know we've seen explosions in the sky, but I'd always just attributed that to evil aesthetic. Why does this dialogue sound like it's from a World War II film and not a fantasy sci-fi show about literal monsters launching a ground attack?

May looks pretty against the sky though. I like her hair color against that purple.

I'm admittedly grasping at positives here because we finally return to her "You have to choose" ultimatum and — surprise! — May has pulled back completely. Ruby says that once they've helped Penny, "We'll...we'll do something!" which is once again her avoiding making a decision. Ruby still refuses to choose, instead falling back on generic, optimistic pep talks. They'll figure out how to stop Salem later. They'll think about the impact of telling the world later. They'll choose who to help later. Ruby keeps pushing these problems into the future where, she hopes, a perfect, magical solution will have appeared for her to latch onto. When that continues to not happen, others pressuring her to actually do something and stop waiting for perfection — Ironwood, Yang, May — she panics and continues stalling for time. Wait an episode and the narrative supports her in this.

Because initially May was forcing Ruby to decide. Now, May enables her desire to keep putting things off. "Don't beat yourself up, kid. At this point, I don't know how much is left to be done." That's the exact opposite of what May believed last episode, that there was still so much work and good to do for the people of Mantle. This is precisely what the show did with Yang and Ren's scenes too, having people call Ruby out... but then return to a message of, 'Don't worry, you're actually doing just fine' before Ruby is forced to actually change.

None of which even touches on May calling her "kid" in this moment. That continues to be a convenient way of absolving Ruby of any responsibility. When she wants to steal airships or Amity Tower, she's an adult everyone should listen to, the leader of this war. When the story wants to absolve her of previously mentioned flaws, she becomes a kid who shouldn't "beat herself up." I said years ago that RWBY couldn't continue to let the group be both children and adults simultaneously, yet here we are.

So that was a thoroughly disappointing scene. Ruby gets her moment to look sad and defeated, listing "the grimm, the crater, Nora, Penny" as problems she doesn't know how to solve. Note that 'Immortal witch attacking the city I've helped trap here' isn't included in that list. Ruby is still ignoring Salem herself and no one in the group is picking up where May left off, challenging her to do more than wring her hands over things others are already trying to take care of: Ironwood is fighting the grimm, May has gone off to help the crater, Klein is patching up Nora and Penny. Ruby, as one flawed individual, should not be expected to come up with a solution to everything, but she does need to stop acting like she can come up with a solution to everything when it matters most (office scene) and rejecting others' solutions when they ask for her help (Ironwood, May).

If it feels like I'm dragging the flawed, traumatized teenager too much, it's not in an effort to ignore those aspects of her identity. Rather, it's because she's also the licensed huntress who wrested control from a world leader and violently demanded she be put in charge of this battle. Ruby, by her own actions, is now responsible for dealing with these problems, or admitting she was wrong and letting others take the lead, without purposefully derailing their plans. She doesn't get to suddenly go, "I don't know," cry a little, and get sympathetic pats.

But of course that's precisely what happens, courtesy of Weiss.

During this whole scene I kept wondering why no one was celebrating Nora waking up, especially when Ruby outright mentions her. Have they just not noticed given all the Penny drama? Because Nora absolutely woke up.

Aaaand went back to sleep, I guess. What was the point of that POV shot? No worries though, she'll wake up again in a minute.

Willow arrives and announces that they can fix the power (and Penny) using the generator at the edge of the property. I'm convinced RT doesn't actually know what a generator is because the characters are acting like it's some super special device that only richy-rich could possibly have. Whitley says that it's the SDC executives who have their "own power supply" and that it's "extremely unfair." Now, don't get me wrong, a good generator powering large portions of your house can run you 30k+, but you can also get one that plugs into your extension cord and powers your fridge for a couple hundred. There's absolutely a class issue here, just not the one Whitley and Weiss seem to be commenting on. They make a generator sound like the sort of device that only a politician-CEO could possible have and it's weird.

Likely, it sounds weird because it's a choppy way of getting Whitley to bring up the wealth disparity so he can then go, 'That's right! We're crazy rich with a company housing tons of ships! We can use those to evacuate Mantle.' Awkwardness aside, I do like that the Schnee wealth is being used for good purposes, but... evacuate where? To the city currently under attack by a giant whale? In a RWBY that wasn't determined to demonize Ironwood, this would have been a great plot point during the office scene instead, with Weiss offering her services to Ironwood, even if the group decides that a continued evacuation still isn't possible.

Instead, we get it here from Whitley. Do I need to point out the obvious? That Whitley is the MVP of this episode? He's done more good in an HOUR than the group has managed in a year. Give this kid some training and make him a huntsmen instead.

We're given a (very pretty!) shot of the shattered moon because it wouldn't be RWBY if we weren't continually reminded that gods once wiped out humanity before destroying part of a celestial body... and absolutely no one talks about that lol.

Blake's coat might not make any sense for her color scheme, but it does make her easy to spot as she and Ruby run across the grounds. Oh my god, they're actually doing something together! It only took eight years. They even get a lovely talk where Blake admits how much she looks up to Ruby, despite her being younger, and once again I'm struck at how much more I would have loved this scene if it had appeared elsewhere in the series. It is, indeed, as sweet and emotional as all the RWBY GIF-ers are claiming... provided you overlook that this is the exact opposite of what Ruby needs to hear right now. She doesn't need to hear that she's more mature and reliable than her elders when she's functioning under a "We don't need adults" mentality. She doesn't need to hear that not knowing what to do is totally fine, not when that led to her turning on Ironwood, despite not knowing how to stop Salem. She doesn't need to hear that "doing something" — doing anything — is a strength, because Ruby keeps avoiding the big problems for smaller ones she's comfortable with, like standing by Penny's bedside instead of deciding between Mantle and Atlas. Blake's speech is heartfelt, but it's a speech that suits a Beacon days Ruby who is having some doubts about her leadership skills, not the girl whose impulsive — and now lack of — actions is having world-wide repercussions. Everyone is babying Ruby to a staggering degree. It's like if we had a med show where the doctor is standing by the bedside of a coding patient, fretting between two treatments. 'Don't worry,' their colleague says, patting their shoulder. 'I've always looked up to you. You'll do something when you're ready' and then they continue to watch the patient, you know, die.

Also: who does Ruby look up to? Everyone talks about how much they depend on and trust Ruby, but who does Ruby look to for guidance? A number of her problems stem from the fact that she has rejected the advice of everyone who has tried to help her improve: Qrow, Ozpin, Ironwood, even Yang. Ruby is presented as the pinnacle of what to strive for in a leader, rather than a leader who has only been doing this for two years and still has a great deal to learn.

Anyway, they get the generator on and the Hound shows up.

I am begging RT to just make RWBY a horror story. All their best scenes the last three years have been horror I am bEGGING —

Anyway, while Ruby waits to be eaten we cut to Willow and Klein, the former of which is reaching for her bottle, pulling back, reaching again, all while her hand shakes. This is good. This is what we should have gotten with Qrow. Which isn't to say that their (or anyone's) addiction should be identical, but rather that this is a far more engaging and complex look at addiction than what our birb got. Willow tells us that she doesn't drink in the dark despite bringing the bottle with her; tries to resist drinking when she's scared and ultimately fails. Qrow just decided to stop drinking after decades of addiction, seemingly for no reason, and that was that. Why is a side character we only met this volume written better than one of the main cast?

Blake manages to call Weiss about the Hound and she asks if Whitley can handle the airships without her. I mean, I assume so given that Weiss is looking at the bookshelves while Whitley does all the work lol. He makes a teasing comment about how he can if she can handle that grimm and she comments that they still need to work on his "attitude."

No they don't. Weiss stuck a weapon in her kid brother's face. Whitley made a joke. Even if Weiss' comment is likewise meant to be read as teasing, it's clear that we've bypassed any meaningful conversation between them. That hug was supposed to be a Fix Everything moment even though, as I've laid out elsewhere, it didn't even come close.

We cut back to Ruby getting thrown through a wall into the backyard and the Hound creepily coming after her. She's freaked out by this clearly abnormal grimm and Blake is weirdly... not? "It's just a grimm. Just focus!" Uh, it's obviously not. Have we reached the traumatized, sleep-deprived point where the group is sinking into full-blown denial? I wouldn't be surprised. They've been awake for like... 40+ hours.

Because the Hound knocks Ruby out with a single hit. Just, bam, she's down. "Focusing" is not the solution here.

Weiss calls to warn the others about the grimm, telling them to stick together. Willow (understandably) starts freaking out and flees the room (classic horror trope!). Klein is left alone when Penny wakes up with red eyes. Oh no!

Don't worry. You know nothing meaningful happens.

She shoves Klein before (somehow?) resisting the hack, her Maiden powers going wild in the process. Just when it looks as if Penny might cause some serious damage, Nora wakes up, takes her hand, and says, I kid you not:

"Hey... no one is going to make you do anything you don't want to do... It's just a part of you. Don't forget about the rest."

Okay. I want to re-emphasize that I love hopeful, uplifting, victory-won-through-the-power-of-love stories. Istg I'm not dead inside, it's just that RWBY does this so badly. I mean, what is this? It has similarities to the character shouting, 'No! Resist!' to their mind-controlled ally, but this is not presented as a desperate, last-ditch effort by Nora. She just speaks like this is the most obvious truth in the world. If you don't want to have your mind taken over... just don't! It's that simple. The problem definitely isn't that Watts has changed her coding and has implemented a command she can't override, it's that Penny has forgotten about the "rest" of her personhood.

And this works. Granted, not for long, but we leave Nora having successfully calmed Penny down and until her eyes unexpectedly go red again scenes later, we're left assuming that this is a permanent solution. That, imo anyway, is taking the Power of Love too far, overriding the basic reality of Penny being hacked. It’s not a personal failing she must overcome, it’s an external attack. I would have rather had Nora react to the scars she saw on her arm, or have a moment with Klein, or get some love from the group. Not a wakes up, falls asleep, wakes up again to save Penny with a Ruby level 'Just ignore reality' pep-talk, then back to sleep again.

So Penny isn't attacking her allies, or mistakenly hurting her allies with wild Maiden powers. Not that the group doesn't have enough to deal with, but still. Weiss arrives to help with the Hound and attempts a new summon, only to fail when two minor grimm burrow up into her glyphs. I really enjoyed that moment, both for the wing visual and the knowledge that Weiss' glyphs can fail if you break them somehow (which makes sense). Also, I just like that she failed in general? Weiss is, as per usual now, about to demonstrate just how OP she is compared to the rest of the team, so it was nice to see her faltering here.

The Hound tries to make off with Ruby and Blake does an excellent job of keeping it tethered. Ruby finally wakes, only to realize that the grimm is actually after Penny since it's staring at her power up through the window, no longer trying to escape. Moments like this remind me that there's someone on RT's writing team that knows what they're doing, at least some of the time. The assumption that the Hound is after Ruby as a SEW, the surprise that it's actually Penny, realizing it holds up because Ruby is covered in Penny's blood and Blake is not... that's all nice, tight plotting. More of that please!

The Hound drops her and Ruby's aura shatters when she hits the ground. I want everyone to remember this moment as an example of how strong the Hound is. The group may be tired, but unlike YJR they've been sitting around in the Schnee manor for a number of hours, regaining strength. We saw the Hound hit Ruby twice — once through the wall and once to knock her out — and then she falls from a not very high distance for a huntress, yet her aura is toast. That's the level of power and skill the Hound possesses. Decimating YJR, knocking Oscar out, same for Ruby, avoiding Blake and Weiss' hits, soon to treat Penny like a ragdoll. Just remember all this for the episode's end.

Blake tells Weiss she'll take care of Ruby, you go help the others. Yay breaking up the duos more! Bad timing though as the new acid-spitting grimm pops out of the ground and Blake is now left alone to face it.

Weiss re-enters the mansion, knowing the Hound is somewhere nearby, but not where. Suddenly, Willow's voice sounds through her scroll with an, "Above you!" which... doesn't keep Weiss from getting hit lol. But it's the thought that counts! Willow has accessed the cameras she's set up throughout the manor, watching the Hound's movements, and I have to say, that is a WAY better use of her separation from Klein than I thought we were getting. I legit thought they'd have Willow run away in a panic, meet the Hound, die, and then Weiss could be sad about losing her mom.

It does say something about RWBY's writing that this was my knee-jerk theory, as well as my surprise when we got something way better.

The Hound runs off, uninterested in Weiss, and she asks Willow to keep tabs on it. It heads for Whitley next (also covered in Penny's blood) and very creepily stalks him in the office with a, "I know you're here." Whitley is seconds away from being Hound chow before one of Weiss' boars pin it against the wall. He runs, then runs BACK to finish deploying the airships, before finally escaping assumed death. Goddamn this boy is pulling his weight.

I assume all these ships are automated then? I hope someone takes a moment to call May. Otherwise it's going to be super weird for the Mantle citizens if a fleet of SDC ships just show up and hover there...

I don't entirely understand how Weiss saved him though. She's nowhere to be seen when Whitley leaves and he runs a fair distance before he and Willow encounter Weiss again. We know her summons don't have to keep right next to her, but are they capable of rudimentary thought, attacking an enemy — and an enemy only — despite Weiss being a couple corridors down and unable to see the current battlefield? I don't know. In another series I'd theorize that this was a deliberate hint, a way to clue us into the fact that Willow, someone who we currently know almost nothing about, had training in the past and summoned the boar herself. Weiss and Winter certainly didn't get that hereditary skill from Jacques. Hell, we might still get that, Weiss reacting with confusion next episode when Whitley thanks her for the boar, but I doubt it. That scene with Ruby and the Hound aside, the show isn't this good at laying groundwork and then following up on it.

Case in point: Weiss says, "I didn't forget you" to Whitley after he gets away from the Hound, the moment trying to harken back to her promise to Willow. Key word is "trying." Because she absolutely forgot him! Weiss threatened and ignored Whitley until he proved his usefulness. I also shouldn't need to point out that, "Don't forget your brother" does not mean, "Don't let your brother die a horrible death by abnormal grimm." Weiss acts like her saving him is a fulfillment of her promise, rather than just the most basic of human decency. And also, you know, her job.

So that part is frustrating. The entire Schnee dynamic is a mess, from Weiss making a joke of her father's arrest, to Willow (presumably) fixing their relationship by putting a hand on her daughter's shoulder. Okay.

Then Weiss cuts off the Hound by summoning a giant wall of ice. My brain, every time this happens:

YOU COULD HAVE FIXED THE HOLE IN MANTLE'S WALL.

Moving on, Blake's fight against the acid... thing has some great choreography, including Blake using her semblance which we haven't seen in AGES. 

I really like the fight itself, just not what Blake is shouting the whole time. "I need you, Ruby! We all need you!" This has really gotten ridiculous. Ruby is presented as everyone's sole savior despite failing time and time again. It's not that I don't think Blake as a character should have faith in her leader, it's that I don't think the writers should be crafting a story where everyone puts their unshakable hopes in an untrained, disloyal, impulsive 17 year old. I mean, Ruby is currently unconscious, yet Blake is acting like if she doesn't wake up — she, as an individual, if Ruby Rose does not re-join this fight — then all is lost. If Ruby doesn't save them, no one can. Which is, of course, absurd on numerous levels. Blake doesn't need the passed out, aura-less Ruby right now, she needs the still very healthy Weiss pulling out multiple summons and an ice wall! Use your scroll and call for backup again.

But of course, Ruby wakes up and kills the new, terrifying grimm with a single hit. It's a preview of what's to come with the Hound and it's just as ridiculous here as it will be there.

Speaking of the Hound, am I the only one who thought this was... cute?

I can't possibly be the only one. That head-tilt is exactly what my dogs do and my brain instinctively went, "Aww, puppy!"

Murderous puppy.

The Hound realizes none of the Schnees are who it's looking for and runs off. Penny, meanwhile, has been fully taken over because, well, that's just what's convenient now. She resists long enough keep Amity up, then succumbs, then resists to apologize to Ruby, then succumbs, then resists because Nora asked her to, then succumbs once it's time to knock her out. If RWBY was willing to commit to consequences, Penny would have been taken over and that was that. The characters would need to deal with whatever outcome happens as a result. Instead, the show very carefully avoids any of those pesky consequences by having Penny successfully resisting at key moments, despite no explanation of how she's managing that.

She shoves Klein again (Klein is having a Bad Time) and starts walking down the main steps. When Whitley wants to know where the hell she's going, Penny mechanically responds that she must "Open the vault, then self-destruct." I suppose the change Watts made was the self-destruct order? Ironwood obviously wants the vault open, though not necessarily Penny's death. Think what you will of his moral compass, she's a damn powerful ally — a research project, perhaps — and a Maiden to boot. At the very least, her death may give the powers to someone even worse.

God, please don't let them have brought Penny back and made her a Maiden just to kill her again.

The Hound arrives though and, as said, knocks Penny out. We're back to square one with her, then. Note though that this attack is near instantaneous. She grabs its hands one second, is hanging limply the next. Wow, the Hound sure is a terrifying antagonist!

Not for long.

"That's enough," Ruby says and one-shots it with her eyes.

Now, I want to talk for a moment about the implications of that line. "That's enough." Obviously Ruby is #done with this situation and emotionally unwilling to let the Hound kidnap Penny (congratulations, Nuts and Dolts shippers), but there's a meta reading here as well. Not intentional, but glaring to me nonetheless. Basically, the idea that the Hound has, from a plot perspective, done enough. It has served its singular purpose. It kidnapped Oscar and now it dies. Never-mind how insanely powerful we've established the Hound to be, never-mind how Ruby's eyes also work or don't work according to whether anything of actual import is on the line. From a plot perspective "that's enough" and the Hound can be disposed of instantly. It got Oscar and gave us an episode of filler creepiness. Move along now.

The idea behind Ruby's eyes isn't bad, but the execution absolutely is. RT has undermined a huge portion of the stakes by giving their protagonist an instant kill-shot that always works precisely when she needs it to. Starting with the Apathy, we have yet to get a moment where Ruby's eyes fail to save the day when she really needs them to, no matter how incredible the challenge. The Hound was very intentionally written to be a grimm outside of the group's current power level. It thinks, it talks, they literally can't touch it. This creates the expectation that the group will need to grow stronger — or at least become smarter — in order to surmount this new obstacle, yet Ruby's eyes undermine all of that. The group hasn't grown in years, the show just makes enemies weaker as needed (Ace Ops), or has Ruby pull out her eyes as a trump card. It wouldn't be that bad if we'd at least gotten a good battle out of it, one where the group gets close to defeating the Hound on their own, but needs Ruby's eyes to finish it off. Instead, she literally walks up without any aura, announces to the audience that this antagonist's time is up, and blasts it out a window.

Granted, Ruby's eyes don't completely finish it. The Hound pulls itself to its feet and we see this.

Yup, that's a guy and yup, those are silver eyes.

I would like to issue a formal apology to the "It's secretly Summer!" theorists in the fandom. I mean, I still think it would be ridiculous (and at this point highly improbable) that Ruby's dead mother has actually been a grimm mutant this whole time, just hanging out in Salem's realm while she waits for the plot to start before attacking the world, and then sends some no-name faunus dude after the group instead of their leader's mother for extra, emotional torture... but you all were definitely right about the “It's a person” part! I... don't know how I feel about this. Admittedly, it seems to be a logical continuation of the other grimm-human hybrids we've seen — namely Cinder and Salem herself — and it finally explains why Salem wants Ruby alive (even though it actually doesn't because WHY did she want more SEWs for Hound grimm when she wasn't even attacking back then? And already has all these other insanely powerful tools??), but at the same time, it feels like it's complicating a story that doesn't need further complications. The group fights monsters and has an immortal enemy. You don't need to add 'Some of those monsters are secretly human' to the mix.

It doesn't hurt that this twist is giving me Attack on Titan vibes, which, ew. A dark time in my fandom life, folks.

The Hound staggers a few steps before Whitley and Willow dump a suit of armor on it. That's all it takes to kill the most dangerous grimm we've ever seen: a single flash of silver eyes and some heavy metal. This also wreaks havoc with the implication that Salem wants SEWs alive because they create such powerful grimm. Obviously not. I mean yeah, normal huntsmen are going to have serious  problems, we’ve seen that this volume, but any other SEWs nearby will take a Hound out instantaneously. For a villain with so many other powerful abilities — immortality, magic, endless normal grimm, her nifty soup — Salem would be much better served just killing SEWs straight out. Clearly, creating Hounds isn't worth the effort.

The Hound leaves some bones behind and Ruby collapses to her knees, overcome with the knowledge that this was once a person. Again, uncomfortable Attack on Titan parallels.

We finish our premiere with Cinder clearing away rubble to reveal Watts. Honestly, I like that we ended on this because her rescue is hilarious. She just slings him over her shoulders like a sack of potatoes and blasts off with her magic fire feet. Fantastic.

Note though that with this scene we've seen almost everything from the clip and the trailer. What's to come in the rest of Volume 8? No idea. Outside of Winter leading the charge with the bomb, we got it all here.

Time to update the bingo board!

I'm crossing off "Introducing new grimm that are quickly abandoned." Between the Hound and acid-dude both falling to a single blast/cut from Ruby, we've more than earned this square.

It doesn't look as if we'll get another Watts-Jacques team-up now that he's left, but you never know.

Maria's got me worried. I feel like her Yoda fight against Neo is the one thing she'll be allowed to do this volume, but given that we didn't see anyone except Ruby's group this episode, we don't yet know whether the story is now ignoring her and Pietro, or if they'll re-appear in another episode like YJR.  

Qrow is free. Will he get a drink before trying to murder Ironwood? Perhaps.

Still no bingo :(

All in all, the episode was by no means horrible. I think there were lots of horrible parts, but also some legitimately well executed moments, fun action, and scenes that I can easily imagine as squee worthy if you lean back and squint. Everything is comparative and in the growing collection of bad RWBY episodes, this one isn't securing a top slot. Which doesn't mean I think it's good, just... not as bad as it could have been and primarily only bad due to long-running problems, not things this specific episode has done. That's my bar then, so low it has officially entered the underworld.

Still, RWBY is back and a part of me is eager to see where this volume takes us, for better or for worse.

Until next week! 💜

[Ko-Fi]

#rwby #rwby spoilers #rwby volume 8 #mymetas #rwby recaps #rwby dark

[inhalyak]

In honor of Menstrual Hygiene Day, I want to share the contents of my period bag! Every menstruating person should carry one. I just recently put one together this year after 10 years of getting periods and boy, I wish I had done it sooner. When I’m prepared for my period, I feel way more comfortable and clean. Ever been caught by the Red Sea in the middle of a public restroom? Here are some things you can carry with you so that you never have to resort to the toilet paper nest ever again.

1. Emanui Menstrual Cup Cleaner - If you use menstrual cups, you need a cup cleaner. I tried to get into cups before, but they ended up living in my bedroom drawer because emptying them in public was such a disaster. I’ve seen a few by different brands, but none seem to have a design like this one. This cup cleaner not only saves you a lot of mess in public restrooms, but it can also be used to sanitize your cup between uses! If you don’t want to dedicate an entire pot in your kitchen to cup cleaning, just fill Emanui with water and pop it in the microwave for 3 minutes.

2. Saalt Menstrual Cup - This cup. My god. I haven’t experienced any leaks since I started using this brand. I started with the Diva Cup and I could never get it to work for me. It rarely opened and the suction never held up, causing a lot of leaks. I might as well have not been wearing a cup at all. But I enjoy the clean feeling of no pad and not being plugged with cotton, so I took a quiz online to see what cup would be right for me. Three different quizzes paired me with this goddess goblet right here. This shape fits my body perfectly. Saalt also works with WISER, an organization that provides sustainable period products for girls in rural Kenya. This is a big deal. So many young girls in this area don’t have access to proper menstrual products, causing many to miss school or risk infection by attempting to manage their period with unsafe materials. When you buy from Saalt, you support your menstrual health and the menstrual health of girls across the globe. (Crochet pattern: Uterus Menstrual Cup Cozy by Schmeel)

3. Midol and Summer’s Eve Towelettes - There will always be cramps for me. I’ve accepted my fate, but that shouldn’t suggest that I have to endure it drug free. I have also accepted that toilet paper is not enough to feel clean after emptying my cup or changing my pad, so I keep these baby wipes for adults on me.

4. Lola Liners - These are 100% organic cotton pantyliners with plant-based bioplastic and non-toxic adhesive. No fragrances, dyes, or bleach. It’s refreshing to see a brand that doesn’t shove the flowers and pink in my face. Something about the heavy “girl power” narrative that most pad companies use in their commercials/packaging rubs me the wrong way. “Yeah, I’m a girl and yeah, I’m on my period, but I can still do things!” Anyone who menstruates knows they are capable of doing things while they’re on their period. Who is this commercial really for? Not everyone who menstruates identifies as female. Not every person who identifies as female wants their power to be juvenilized or labeled as separate from anyone else’s power. Why not call it “woman power” or just “power”? How many adults requested for their pads to be bright pink with flowers?! That’s something a child would want, right? That’s something a man would design for a woman. I don’t know. Just rubs me the wrong way. Give me plain, solid color wrappers please. Lola is a woman-owned company, by the way.

5. Always Pure Cotton Flexfoam Pads - They’re not flowers, okay? They’re cotton. My previous rant still stands. The flexfoam is amazing. Other pads left me feeling kind of swampy in the pants. Not these. They are also unscented. Who decided to make scented pads in the first place? I keep pads close during my period. The menstrual cup is my main squeeze, but some days are more sensitive than others. Every few cycles, my first day will not facilitate entry under any circumstances. I just don’t feel like stuffing anything up there. That’s where these bad boys come in... or don’t. I haven’t made the transition to period underwear or reusable pads just yet. I need more cleaning information and dinero before I take that leap. In the meantime, I use these.

#period #menstrual cup #menstrualhealth #endperiodpoverty #endperiodstigma #what’s in my bag #pads #people who menstruate #menstrual products #menstrualhygiene #og