#and some of these have given me the some of the worst years of my life lmao

[needlebeetles]

gritting my teeth about the way some people are talking about tracker.

like, obviously we’re going to be more sympathetic to PCs than NPCs overall because we spend more time with them and everyone’s entitled to their own opinion but guess what that includes me!

you’re mad at the queer teenager with a fantasy chronic illness that she clearly struggles with accepting who was forced to leave home and dropped out of school for semi-amicably breaking up with her girlfriend and finding a more stable system elsewhere?

obviously Kristen would be hurt over her ex finding love in someone else who struggles with the same stuff she does (undiagnosed ADHD) but with a support system and money.

Tracker’s issues with Kristen that were brought up in fantasy high sophomore year (feeling as though it’s always about her business and that it can’t ever be about Tracker, Kristen not really wanting to go through the work of making up with Tracker when they could just ignore it) are what make her interesting! Otherwise she’s just romantic interest cardboard!

Tracker’s whole thing with Wolfsong Revival and it’s prosperity vs the “realness” of a more ragged religious movement is also something she’s shown to have issues around, given how she reacts when Kristen brings it up. She’s complicated! She felt like a tag along in fhsy (despite agreeing to basically that)! Her worst nightmare was something that happens to her once a month!

#Bugposts #fantasy high #fantasy high junior year #fhjy #tracker o'shaughnessey #kristen applebees

[flight0fthenavigat0r]

A Goodbye to The Bad Batch

I don’t even know what to say first. Because this is goodbye, but it is also everything but. But I suppose I should start at the beginning.

Just a couple of years ago I found my love for Star Wars. My entire life, as far back as I can remember, my dad has tried to get me into the fandom. Now, he’s not a fan the exact same way some of us are, he’d only watched the saga and the Mandalorian, funnily enough I was the one to introduce him to The Clone Wars and beyond, but it’s been a joy in his life for a very long time. I was never interested in it when I was little, but then I got a little older and Star Wars started to capture my interest.

One random weekend, I believe in 2021 or 2022, I decided that I was going to watch all nine saga movies in those forty-eight hours, and then start on my goal to watch every show and the additional movies.

This is, without a shred of doubt, one of the greatest decisions I have ever made, and one that I will never regret. I would not be the person I am had I not given Star Wars a chance.

It would sound ridiculous to anyone anywhere else, but this has become such a safe place for me that I know I can be honest.

Everyone finds that one thing that makes them happy like nothing else. A person, a hobby, a place, a fandom. Mine is the galaxy far, far away that lets me escape from my life whenever I need to.

The Star Wars fandom has its faults, and there is so much hatred.

But more than anything, there is love like no love I have ever experienced before. The love between fans and our love for these movies and shows is something I never expected to have in my life. But somehow, for some reason, it has all found a permanent place in my heart, and I couldn’t be happier.

At this time, the first season of The Bad Batch had just been released. I was branching out, watching The Clone Wars and then jumping to The Book of Boba Fett, though I’m not sure why I chose to watch everything in such a completely random order.

But then I started The Bad Batch.

I had no idea what Crosshair, Tech, Wrecker, Hunter, Echo, and Omega would come to mean to me.

I have dealt with a lot in the last few years. Nothing compared to others, but depression finds a way to wedge into your life. I love to be alone, but I don’t like to be lonely, and I have managed to isolate myself to a point of misery.

I found more comfort in The Bad Batch than anything else in my life, and I will never forget the joy The Bad Batch brought me in these last few years.

I began to write when I found Star Wars, and I was inspired to do so by The Bad Batch. Before, I had never felt so compelled by any one piece of media to add my own part of it to the world, until this. Writing has become another escape, one that gives me an outlet to continue the stories of characters left behind.

What I already knew has been reaffirmed, the lessons I have learned remain with me, and will even after this is over.

That it’s okay to feel afraid, because everyone does, and to make mistakes, provided you learn from them.

That feeling out of place for one reason or another does not make you unworthy of love, and having limitations with affection isn’t something you need to apologize for.

That being goofy, having fun, finding joy in the dark places, is just as vital a part of life as anything else, if not what we need more than anything.

That taking time for yourself, to make sure you don’t fall apart, even while taking care of others, is important.

That our worst moments can be one of two things, what consumes us, or what we grow from.

That being a young woman is not a detriment to your worth, intelligence, talent, or any other aspect of life, but is in fact what makes you strongest.

That what makes us unique and our faults are a part of who we are, but they do not define us, and we are so much more than the ideas people have of us.

My only regret is not making friends when I had the chance. I’m bad at that, opening up and putting myself out there, and I shy away from talking to new people because it makes me uncomfortable. But I wish I had been able to put that aside before it was too late and found people who love The Bad Batch the way I do to continue talking to, even after the show ends.

But to all the people who have supported me and who I have supported, thank you for being part of my Bad Batch experience.

It's very difficult to believe that this is it.

Though The Bad Batch has not been around long, it feels like it has, because as long as I have been watching Star Wars, The Bad Batch has been in its active run, and I’m so grateful I got to be here when it was.

I know that even when the credits roll for the final time, when the greater fandom forgets the show that they never really understood the way we have, I’ll be here, and hopefully, so will all of you. I think that the family brought together by The Bad Batch will endure, even if we go quiet for a while.

We’ll stick around, for the day the Batch comes back. Because I know they will.

Thank you Clone Force 99, the Bad Batch fandom, Dee Bradley Baker, Michelle Ang, the Kiners, and everybody who played a part in telling this story.

The impact The Bad Batch has had on my life has been profound, and I wouldn’t give it up for anything. It’s been a wild ride, and I have enjoyed every second of it. It has been a privilege to be a part of this piece in the ever growing history that makes up Star Wars.

Goodbye, Bad Batch. Until next time.

“Change takes getting used to. You’ll see. Just give it time.”

#star wars #the bad batch #tbb #star wars the bad batch #sw tbb #star wars tbb #sw the bad batch #the bad batch season 3 #tbb crosshair #crosshair tbb #crosshair bad batch #tbb tech #tech tbb #tech bad batch #tbb wrecker #wrecker tbb #wrecker bad batch #tbb hunter #hunter tbb #hunter bad batch #tbb echo #echo tbb #echo bad batch #tbb omega #omega tbb #omega bad batch

[beatrixstonehill2]

"I've officially been a Hooters girl for one year! Just look at how fucking big my boss has made my tits. I was a C-Cup when I got hired. Before I even got my uniform they were shoving these supplements in my face. I kind of love it but I know if I ever want a real job someday I'll have to chop these embarrassing things off. It's all my coworkers and I talk about, finally getting out of the job and getting a reduction or having these monster tits we were forced to grow chopped off completely. It sucks, cuz I liked my boobs and thought they were so pretty. But now look at these grotesque melons I'm forced to walk around with all day. Every guy assumes I'm some free-use breeding cow. I've given up trying to fight them off. My commutes are now just one giant hardcore porno shoot. Which is to say nothing about how many customers I have to tit fuck and suck off every shift. Men are so greedy.....

The second guys see these huge lactating tits of mine they go nuts. They could be walking arm-in-arm with their pregnant girlfriend and still run over grope my tits and fuck me. The girlfriends just watch and film it anyway, sometimes they even masturbate, watching their bfs fuck me and smack me around. It's pathetic how used to being a cum dumpster I've become. I don't even care or notice when cum is pouring down my legs anymore. I actually leave a pool of cum wherever I sit. I can't believe what this job has turned me into, all because my dad talked me into working here, calling it a great opportunity.

Well, I hope they like taking care of all the grandkids I'll be forced to push out now. Since we're all in various stages of pregnancy, as well (Two months along with batch two!). I always dreamt of my first pregnancy being with my husband, us cherishing our kids. Not me getting fucked against the door of a subway car as a literal crowd of men surround me, all taking turns fucking me. Giving birth not in a nice hospital with my husband at my side, but instead at work as my boss gives me tequila shots for the pain, as customers face fuck me while I'm pushing out triplets. I thought men were supposed to be more gentle with pregnant girls? I swear once my belly gets really big and round they go ballistic. Way more guys start hitting me, roughing me up just for fun as they fuck me in bigger groups. My boss actually likes it when I come into work with bruises on my boobs and belly or a black eye, says it gets the customers more aroused.

Now after all this sex and breeding and my breasts getting so big I feel like my spine is gonna snap any day, I can't focus on school at all. My one way out of this job and it's like if I go ten minutes without getting fucked or playing with my tits and pussy I get agitated and restless. Like I'm addicted to getting fucked, even if 90% of it is not consensual. I'm literally fantasizing about getting my clothes ripped off and fucked in public, humiliated and treated like garbage as I write this. What the hell am I becoming? I'm doomed to drop out and keep working here. How big are my tits gonna be in a year? My brain can't take this, it's like my mind is breaking and soon I'll be nothing but a cock-addicted pregnant bimbo with a 40 IQ and breasts that weight over 100lbs a piece. The worst part is, I keep thinking to myself..... is that such a bad thing?"

#be #breast expansion #breast inflation #bimboification #dumbification #free use kink #cnc free use #corruption kink #mindless breeder #breeding k1nk

[greenandhazy]

I just queued up a post about sustainable fabrics and started to write something in the tags before realizing that it was drifting away from the point

but PSA: with the caveat that the most sustainable item of clothing is the one that's already in your closet, I would suggest that if you are someone who struggles with temperature regulation, you should seriously consider adding more linen and wool to your wardrobe. determining the "true" environmental impact of various fibers is v complicated, but for a start they both use significantly less water than conventional cotton, and imo the improvement they've had on my quality of life is well worth the substitution.

linen and wool are by far the best fabrics for temperature regulation--the former is lighter and more breathable than cotton and will keep you cooler in the summer, the latter is breathable but heavier and more insulating and will keep you warmer in the winter, even if it gets wet. (there's actually a saying among people who hike/do winter sports that "cotton kills" because you are more prone to hypothermia in cotton undergarments than in wool.) do not even get me started on linen/wool vs polyester.

this is something that I think is especially important given higher cost of heating lately, higher temperatures due to climate change, and the number of people who have health conditions or medications that make them sensitive to heat. this isn't to say that your clothing/bedding choices will compensate for a livable environment, but as someone who used to wake up 2-3 times a week sweating in synthetic sheets for four months of the year, and shiver in an inadequately heated room for another three, these little swaps can seriously make extreme temperatures a little more bearable.

that being said, wool and linen do tend to be more expensive, so if you're looking to get the most bang for your buck, I would recommend starting with:

linen sheets, even just a fitted sheet (some companies do sell them solo). overheating while sleeping is literally the worst.

linen pants, especially if you work in a job that doesn't allow you to wear shorts. linen shirts are also nice, but even cotton/poly shirts tend to be thinner than pants and might already be short-sleeved/you can roll up the sleeves, so the impact of pants will be more immediate.

a chunky wool sweater. avoid cashmere, and merino unless it has cables--these are very soft, lovely wools, but they're generally pretty light and made more for their softness than their insulation properties. for maximum warmth, you don't want a thin "office sweater," you want a "my Irish gran knit this in her cottage on the windy coast" sweater.

wool socks. these are more likely to keep you dry and warm if you're walking through slush or rain, in addition to just general walking-around-the-house warmth. for these I would say the type of wool matters a little less, generally because you do want socks that are somewhat lightweight so you can wear them in shoes. and just FYI you're also more likely to see wool socks blended with silk, nylon, or spandex for strength and elasticity, so don't drive yourself up the wall trying to find the mythical 100% wool sock. even hobby knitters tend to blend wool with something because of the amount of friction that wears on socks.

again! the most sustainable type of clothing is what you already own. but some of these are the kinds of small swaps you can definitely make over time, and you might find them genuinely helpful.

[camgoloud]

you ever just. become overwhelmed by a sudden out-of-nowhere wave of tenderness and affection and longing for reconnection directed towards someone to whom you no longer speak for Very Good Reasons

#‘out of nowhere’ she says like she hasn’t been doing a lot of reading/thinking recently about various tragic messy breakups #and the later regrets of the parties involved #anyway. tell me not to text her #it’s been over two years since the last time we talked… absolutely no reason to break that streak now. lord give me strength #she was really fucking mean to me! like objectively intentionally unwarrantedly cruel! it ruined an entire year of my life #and fundamentally changed me as a person on a deep level! there’s a lot of things i used to like about myself that i don’t think i’m ever #going to get back #and yet every once in a while we have to do the whole ‘maybe i could make things right’ song and dance 😔 #the thing is most of the time i’m not even really angry with her anymore like enough time has passed since all the shit went down that #really i just sort of look at her behavior and feel sad. both because of the impact on me but also because of the ‘that’s really how you #felt you needed to act towards someone who cared about you? you couldn’t have just expressed your feelings in an honest and productive way #instead of just lashing out in the cruelest possible way and ruining the entire relationship beyond hope of repair?’ #and i feel bad and sorry that it went that way and honestly i kind of pity her and hope she’s gotten some of her shit worked out #so i’m not like. actively pissed off at her anymore. but also i can’t think about her without thinking about the worst year of my life so 🙃 #i don’t actually feel that trying to reopen that door would be very healthy for me at least #we did try a Reconciliation of sorts a couple of months after the initial falling-out and while it was kind of helpful for me in that she #like. apologized lmao. and affirmed that i wasn’t crazy and she did in fact On Purpose say the most hurtful things she possibly could have #said to me given the information she had at her disposal. and that i really had not done anything to her that could warrant that. etc. #it also left a sour enough taste in my mouth that i just don’t see a future where the two of us spending time together is enjoyable for me #and yet… the regret will always live inside me i think. maybe if i were a stronger person… #caseyposting

[timetravellingkitty]

.

#last night an ex friend who ignored me for 6 fucking months just messaged me saying “oh im sorry i want to make things clear between us” #“i dont want any bad relations before the end of the year blah blah blah” #and she didn't even apologise properly #i told her i didnt accept her apology because i didnt trust her anymore and that i deserved friends who cared about stuff like that #and her response to that? “wow nice to see you're so cocky let me knock your ego down a few notches” #“you're a loud and obnoxious bitch you think you the world revolves around you just cause you read some feminist books” #which tells me that she really didnt mean her sorry #she just wants a clean slate and validation she's actually a good person #im sorry but you dont get to use as a stepping stone for YOUR character development #why apologise if you don't fucking mean it #and the worst part is my friend still thinks she's a good person and whatever blah blah blah FUCK OFF #i know no one really wants to listen what i have to say given that i'm always taken as a joke #but srsly fuck off it's amazing how her friend hurting me isnt a big deal cause she's “not as bad as i think she is” #god i miss my old friends we have such a strong bond but we don't meet that often i just want to hug them so bad #i'm glad i didnt listen to the part of me that wanted to forgive her one of my ex friends was also like her and i've learnt my lesson #vent #personal

[mxwhore]

patron saint of being hot

and a lot of skill and really interesting anecdotes about your life and having professors that give me second hand anxiety bc they seem kinda awful and mean. But mainly just being hot

ty! admittedly my professors are not that bad, ive only had one bad professor that was more incompetent that awful. if you want another anecdote, ill tell you about the only teacher i truly despise to this day (on the tags, cuz its a very dark story)

ask gamerino

#i retook that course with a different professor and passed expectacularly. now for the horrendous teacher #on this story we have vomiting injuries and attempted suicide so watch out #in my last two years of our highschool equivalent i had PE with a teacher that loved to play favorites #if u were on a sport team you were immediately given special treatment and as you might already tell i wasnt. i hate ball sports #i loved exercising but i dreaded PE because of her #i have a condition that made my periods incredibly painful and meself anemic so those weeks were hellish #even though i was a good student she would NEVER let me sit out the navette test. even with a doctors note #i would do my best and then literally go vomit and pass out in the bathroom cuz if i did it on the court i would be berated #that wasnt enough to earn my absolute hatred tho. we now move to the worst day of my life to this day #it was just getting to school from lunch (we could go home and have it there) and i had PE #when i get a text #it was my best friend being cryptic thanking me for being a friend and saying goodbyes #he was going to commit suicide #i absolutely lost my shit as one does and went on a rampage #i couldnt get in contact with anyone (his ex stepdad was abusive and isolated his family) and they didnt let me get out of school #i was desperate and my friends were trying to help me but i didnt know what to do. i called my mom and she called his school and then i just #sat and waited with a friend. while the other classmates did the navette test #the minutes passed. i got message from my bffs number and it was his mom telling me she found him just in time #i broke then. i started sobbing and screaming and scratching my arms and my friend held me and tried to keep me from hurting myself #some other classmates came concerned and tried to help #then the teacher came. she just looked at one of the volleyball girlies who shrugged #she didnt ask if i was ok or if i needed to call someone or go somewhere. she just asked if i planning to do the test #i said no and she left and i kept crying #when i felt stable enough i went to see what had happened and she just failed me. i couldnt give the test any other day and that was that #she simply didnt care #i had to calm myself down while writing this. its no use getting emotional over a teacher that didnt care #but i hate her. she made the worst day of my life worse and she doesnt know and doesnt care #that memory fuels me to never surrender to indifference and make the pain in this world worse #my bff got help he needed after that and our bond is stronger than ever. he never pulled something like that again #thats the story! not gonna tag this babes

[medicinemane]

.

#I get tired of people trying to explain what lens I should view the world through; what way I could think that would make everything better #forgive me but I don't care; I do what I do and I do what I can and you don't see the work I do under the hood #I don't want advice on self validation or whatever; I want... I want someone to hold a mirror up so I can actually see myself #by which I mean I want input on how I'm doing; if it's good enough; if it's worth anything; if anything I make is good #everyone things I'm nice; everyone has always thought I'm nice #but given nice leaves me profoundly isolated I don't think I care #not to mention in my opinion what nice in this instance means is that I'm capable of listening #it's mostly that I have manners rather than some quality about me #I'm well behaved and polite and can listen; and that's perceived as nice or even sweet #and it's not like I'm offended by people seeing me that way; but maybe you can get why... I can't do anything with that information #but if I'm doing enough... if I provide any value to the world... I might have heard that less times in my life than years I've lived #that's where I'm totally blind #people don't tend to offer any input; and also people don't tend to let me know what they're thinking #and I in fact am not a mind reader; I can often accurately infer things; but no of that means a thing till it's confirmed #and... well... hopefully no one reads the stupid shit I say and especially not the tags so this is safe and hidden #but truthfully people just like to hear that stuff they're doing is wanted and matters #and I do not #I don't know... gotta go do more cleaning cause I need to #and I have no idea if... I've got a reason for fighting so hard to clean; but I get very little input so... I expect... well... #and thankfully I don't think they read my tags so I can say this #but I really expect they won't take me up on my offer to come out here and get away from their parents; so there will be no pay off #not that I blame them in the slightest... it's just the only possible pay off for this cleaning would be helping someone I like out #and a scrap of company #but then again... in many ways anyone coming out to live with me is the worst thing they could probably do #sorry... I have a rather bleak outlook on many things surrounding myself purely cause of what I infer from the past #there is never pay off; only more shit I need to get done #I will never be loved; I will never be wanted; I will always just kinda be an afterthought that's occasionally worth venting to #no one will ever be particularly interested in anything I'm interested while I'll chase their interests or at least try to #certainly let them talk about them when they want #...though I take that over my normal total isolation... better to at least be permitted to follow in someone's shadow than have nothing

[daz4i]

it's so hard being a person who needs to be the best at everything when you are slightly below average at best at any given department

#i don't think ppl who tell me i'm good at x thing (that includes things like looks or voice etc btw) are lying or anything #but i do think they're biased and their love skews their perception of me. bc i mean. no one else can see it after all #and i hate that as a kid i was propped up as better than others bc it really did give me this complex while growing up lol #joining a gifted class and finding out i'm not actually particulary smart compared to them #failing auditions as an adult or messing up things i did get into #like this is why i don't like it when ppl say i have an impostor syndrome like noooo i literally do suck 😭 #i'm not saying this in an 'i'm blind to my own abilities' way i'm just saying that compared to most people i am below average 😭 #being better at a thing than the average person who. doesn't do the thing. doesn't mean much when i'm among the worst in those who do #and it's really discouraging from getting better at things too. bc i feel so inherently shitty at everything that it feels pointless #(esp given that i DID put years of effort into certain things yet i still suck or i lost my ability to do them with time) #so it's easier to not try. if i'm gonna be the worst anyway yknow? may as well save the effort and the heartache of trying and failing #(getting better is all about failing over and over yada yada ik all that shit i'm just not built to handle it. mentally) #vent #accidentally. bc i started rambling. bc i'm in some jealousy fueled rage rn sorry

[bobzora]

there are some bits of what they did with the rooftop scene that i like and others where i was like :/ this isn't as good as it could be. and this is an important scene lmao

#bobtalk #p3reposting #this is also a scene where i'm really attached to the old translation. so lol. #still sad that we dont have you will be given one year move forth without falter with your heart as your guide <- attached to this one also #also kind of split on the reload version of kimi no kioku. it's a good song no matter what though (the best persona song in general) #(no arguments there. nobody does it like my goat kimi no kioku.) (the reload version is good ive decided btw) #IN GENERAL. the reload cutscenes. well. the production value is higher or whatever than the original. #but man they're just. not as good im sorry. im the most annoying person in the world possibly but #i think the worst offender by FAR is the opening cutscene because the original was so striking and well directed. and reload's just does NO #hit the same at allllll. major loss imo #the awakening is the runner up when it comes to lost oomph. as one would expect lol #that's a thing with the remake like it's modernized and higher production value and it looks GREAT. and i LIKE a lot of its changes #i really do. tartarus has never been nicer to explore #but in the process there are quite a few spots where it's lost some of its. artistic vision(?) i guess. #anyway reload second persona game for me to physically cry during lmao. voice acting in the sun SL second last day scene got me #i think my main takeaway from reload is that it doesn't replace the originals. but of course it was never going to. and at the end of the #day. i'm glad it exists. i had a good time...and now i'm going to rest. lol

[akkivee]

if i’ve spent egregious amounts of time reading fics or just put in stupid time in the fandom i’m counting it as a brainrot so

pokemon

sailor moon/dbz

sonic

batman/harley quinn

naruto

anything CLAMP

fruits basket

detective conan

super smash bros/anything nintendo

shugo chara

reborn

hetalia

free

the hobbit

marvel

bnha

voltron

hypmic

daiya no ace

twst

ORV

slam dunk

#this is vee speaking #this wasn’t difficult i think i just struggled on what i should include lol #like i struggled with deciding if i wanted to include batman but ultimately went yeah #because harley quinn and amy from sonic were twin hammer wielding gals who loved so thoroughly it changed me as a kid LOL #those two and misty from pkmn define the type of girls i stan thanks saturday morning cartoons lol #a lot of these run concurrently if you couldn’t tell tho lol like i have been sharing so much brain space while hypmic has been my main #and some of these have given me the some of the worst years of my life lmao #the hetalia phase was fun but the fandom is the reason i run this blog so minimally lol #i’m excited for the shugo chara sequel but i also despise her love interests esp now that i’m not her age anymore lmao #fck vld like actually and thank you hypmic for saving me from it lmao #and i’m actually having a great time with slam dunk lol it’s just so brutal the series is 33 years old lol #which means i have no outlet for how down bad i am for A SIDE CHARACTER in the series (tho he’s very popular in the modern fandom lol) #and i’ve been using google translate to read fics since the series blew up in seasia and all the fics are in chinese LOL #it’s such a fun and new experience since the eng fanbase is nonexistent but it’s frustrating that the eng fanbase is nonexistent lmao

[hella1975]

why is there a twenty marker analysing empirical evidence of game theory on this saturday exam

#t-minus three hours this is the one im MOST unprepared for so somehow it's gonna go worse than all the others #and idk if my mental state can handle that bc ive been working stupidly hard since DECEMBER every single fucking day #just to this week fail three exams consecutively going on a fourth today #like a twenty marker on pure essay-style waffle would usually be a DREAM for me #bc it's literally my coursemates' worst nightmare bc they're all maths-brained and cant form a sentence to save their life #so this is literally the first time in two years that english is gonna help me out with my degree #but we've NEVER done an essay-style question in game theory before or ANY of my modules for that matter #and he hasn't given us any practise questions so we literally have no idea what to expect #like i have no fucking clue what im doing #im so mad at everything rn like im just so ANGRY and i know after today im gonna be forced to acknowledge #that that anger cant go anywhere so it's just gonna turn into one very burnt-out exhausted self-loathing breakdown #im guessing that's gonna hit tonight at some point <3 weekend plans! #BUT STILL AFTER TODAY IM FINISHED #EXAM SEASON YOU HAVE BEEN HELLISH TRULY MY WORST ONE YET #hella goes to uni

[mars-ipan]

^ nervous but excited

#the senior picnic is tomorrow and i’m genuinely looking forward to it #i’m also kinda scared shitless bc i am going to. ask someone out lmao #SCARED !!!!! i have literally never directly asked someone out with my words before #bc like. okay. when i was a kid and had my first crush #i told EVERYONE in the class except that kid. so eventually someone accidentally told him #since then i have sworn myself to secrecy with crushes. i tell my most trusted friends and NOBODY else #….iiiincluding the person i’m crushing on #i once wrote a note to a kid in middle school but 90% sure i was bearding so i don’t really count it #anyways point is i have liked this person like literally all year. and i do not know what i’m doing #i’ve done tarot readings. i’ve had dreams (they kissed me in my nap dream earlier it was O-O). like i am being given the green light #and i know if i DON’T say anything i’ll regret it #and worst case scenario it’ll be a lil awkward and then we’ll go back to being friends (they’re not an asshole and neither am i) #but i’m still so so so fucking nervous bc i’ve never done this before!!!! and it’s new and i’m not in control and idk what will happen like #at all #bc ok. i don’t think i’m definitely going to get rejected. but i also don’t think it’s definitely gonna be mutual yaknow??? #bc i’ve been looking for signals. and i think there have been some???? #i’m normally very good at knowing when ppl are flirting with me #but when i like the person i become COMPLETELY oblivious no matter how hard i try #i am fully unsure of how they feel about me #like offering to do heart hands with someone for a picture and regularly complimenting their hair and foot positioning and laughing at jokes #when nobody else does and and and #they do a bunch of shit like that! and it’s just like. they’re such an overall nice person that idk if they’re flirting w me #or if that’s just who they are. i do not know #ANYWAYS. i gotta go to bed so i’m well-rested and don’t chicken out #bc i will kick myself forever if i do #uhhhh #goodnight tumblr #wish me luck !! please i need it very badly

[synonymroll648]

*deepest sigh you have ever heard in your life* send me a ඞ for a snippet of the second among us fanfiction i’m writing for an english final this year 

#this english final is off the walls bonkers. i was given creative freedom and i fear i have flown too close to the sun #there's breaking bad references even though i've literally never watched the show #i figured out vitals mechanics even though i haven't played among us since middle school #but i accidentally broke among us lore super hard by not knowing that polaris is a star in a different solar system #which at least implies that among us takes place in a different solar system. according to my space nerd partner #so me making my little among us guy a criminal part of a court case AGAINST THE SUPREME COURT totally fucks up the lore #so it's now an au when i was trying SO HARD to be canon compliant #2nd among us fic for an english final #that's the tag now. i hate that this exists #and yet i do it to myself #tbf what i hate more is that the original among us fic i wrote for an english final earlier this year has some REALLY good lines #but the worst pacing i have ever written. like the pacing is so bad i can't fully reread it. i cringe too hard #but i have lines that go hard and it's for a FUCKING AMONG US FANFICTION. DO YOU FEEL MY PAIN #that applies to this among us fic too :(((( and the lines are good but some have to go but i want to share :((( and so this post exists

[usedtobemygirl]

i just. would like to give up

#im in so much pain . how long do u have to hurt for it to stop lmao #ill be praying my life ends this new year and it won’t happen . #and ill have another year where i don’t do anything productive and everybody hurts me . #it’s a given that ill just experience pain consistently at this point ! #ive tried to manifest happiness /be positive but nothing ever helps lmao im so alone #ive spent my entire life in loneliness and all ive ever wanted is love and friendship … #some of the worst people have friends but im still incapable of firming connections w people 😃 #i truly like . am not a real person

[iloveyoumorethansoup]

Things I discovered today: I have to work 10 hours in a library and teach a class to pass one of my classes. This is definitely not happening. This is 20% of my grade

#shooting for a C 😞✌️ #also the grade I would have to teach is 2nd grade #I’m so deeply not willing to do that #and the library thing. it has to be related to teaching in some way #I Do Not Want To Teach Whatsoever #i have a 96% in the class rn #and that’s 70% of the class. the final project is 10% of the class #and the rest is 20%. so if I do everything but the 20. ill end up with about a 75% #which should be a C #which is passing. Cs made degrees as they say #edit: apparently I need a C+ to pass but last year I heard it was a D?? which is it #anyways I have to meet with my counselor and be like oh bestie please god help #i can switch one of my half semester classes out for a second if I can get into the class #and if I can get this one pass fail I could be totally fine #but. this is making me unhappy :/ #soup talks #also fun fact I do live in college housing I am given wifi. there is absolutely no wifi rn #and when it’s been here so far it’s been the worst wifi I’ve ever had