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#and if they aint pissed
starrysharks · 6 months
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i like my trad stuff more
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ovcii-doodles · 2 months
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The Director always said it was important to have ambition, Captain Tucker. We are the Meta, and together we will be strong enough to save your friends.
meta tucker gang we've waited almost 10 years for this (I made the quote up btw)
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leeenuu · 9 months
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goldenshornyjail · 5 months
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Angry Lovin' 🍑
Ruby: (visiting Blake and Yang’s new house) Wow, Yang! This place is super nice!
Yang: Thanks, Rubes! Took me a while to come up with the materials to build, but construction was easy.
Ruby: Not too stressful?
Yang: Nope! Best part about working on building stuff. You can destroy wrecked materials to blow off some steam.
Ruby: Speaking of stress. How's Blake’s new job-?
Blake: (damn near kicks in the door, fuming in anger)
Ruby: (jumps in terror)
Yang: Hey, baby, how was work?
Blake: (huffing and puffing as she storms passed Yang and Ruby without so much as a second glance) Eat my ass!!!
Yang & Ruby: (watch as Blake slams the door to a room down the hall)
Yang: .......Well! (Slaps her hands on her knees as she gets off the couch) I better tend to that.
Ruby: (stares at Yang incredulously) How?! I've never seen Blake that mad in my life!!!
Yang: Easy. (Pulls a bandana out of her pocket and ties it around her neck like a bib) When a woman invites you to dine, you never refuse.
Ruby: (dies as she watches Yang strut nonchalantly to the room Blake disappeared into and slowly puts on a pair of headphones to drown out the noise) ......I need therapy.....
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wikitpowers · 2 months
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ash morgenstern is gonna mess me up so bad
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artist: @charliebowater
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grimalkinmessor · 9 months
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Aideku with blood (smut) 🙏❤️
Sorry this took so long, smut is hard 🥲How about a vamp AU? :3 Warnings in the tags ✨
Aideku/Smut/Blood
———
Izuku is nervous.
"Don't be such a pussy, Deku," Tsubasa jeers, shoving him forward. The mausoleum looms in front of them, haloed by the setting sun. "It's one night."
"Yeah, you can handle one night in an empty building, can't you?" Neiru laughs. "Or...mostly empty, anyway. Aside from a few corpses."
Izuku swallows. "I-I can do it! I just—"
"Good," Neiru interrupts, stepping up to open the big stone door. It opens with a grating moan, a vast expanse of black yawning beyond it. Neiru gives a mocking bow. "In you go then!"
Nails biting into his palms, Izuku sets his jaw. "...I do this, and you'll give me my picture back?"
Tsubasa throws an arm around Izuku's shoulders, leaning in close and making his skin crawl. "Aw c'mon, Deku, we're friends, right?"
They haven't been friends in years.
"It's just a little game. The picture's just insurance that you won't chicken out. We'll give it back if you make it the whole night without bailing."
Izuku doesn't believe him. But what choice does he have? If he refuses, he doubts they'll hand it over—it's more likely that they'll rip it up right in front of him. Besides, Izuku is less concerned about spending the night in a mausoleum than he is Tsubasa and Neiru letting him out in the morning.
But even if they don't, Izuku is crafty. He'll figure it out.
Tightening his hold on his backpack, Izuku strides forward into the tomb.
"Finally! Thought we'd have to throw you in," Tsubasa complains, and Neiru snickers as he begins to push the door shut.
"Have fun, Deku!"
Before Izuku can even reply, the door thuds shut, and the bar scrapes back into place over it from the outside. Izuku waits a moment before fumbling for his phone, turning on the flashlight to get a good look around. It's not that big of a space really, but it's full of cobwebs and coated in a thick layer of dust. It's clear that these ancestors haven't been visited in a very long time. There's about six plaques on either wall, some of them so old that the kanji has worn down so much he can't make out the names. They're so old that Izuku wouldn't be surprised if there were actual bodies behind those plaques rather than just urns full of ash.
And speaking of bodies—the biggest thing in the room is the long stone slab directly opposite the door. It has no plaque on it, but the seam between the heavy stone lid tells Izuku that it's likely a coffin, which means that he really is locked in here with a corpse.
Izuku gulps. It's fine. It's fine. He can handle this. There's nothing to be afraid of.
Shaking his head, Izuku finds a fairly clean spot in the middle of the room and sits down, shrugging off his backpack to rifle through it. First things first; he pulls out his actual flashlight, shutting his phone off to preserve the battery. He clicks his flashlight on and sets it on the floor like a tiny lamp, before tugging out one of his textbooks. Might as well get some work done while he's stuck here.
He's almost out of high school now, looking into nearby colleges so he can stay close to his mother—which makes it all the more pathetic that he's still getting pushed around by people like Tsubasa and Neiru. Granted, it's not as bad as it used to be, but it's still irritating.
Izuku tries to ignore his surroundings as he works his way through the next chapter, gnawing on his pen and occasionally jotting down notes in the margins. This works for a while; he manages to make his way through two whole chapters without much trouble. He loses track of time a bit, until—
—something skitters across his foot.
Izuku shrieks, throwing himself back on instinct, leg flailing as he tries to stand only to end up toppling harshly against the casket behind him. Yelping, Izuku crashes back to the ground, clutching his shoulder with a wince. It throbs when he touches it, and he hisses quietly. That's going to bruise.
Grabbing blindly for his flashlight, Izuku staggers back to his feet and looks around for whatever just tried to climb his pants leg. He sees a spider the size of his hand sprint into a crack in the wall, and Izuku shudders, making a soft 'blegh' sound.
Swinging the light around slowly, Izuku freezes when he realizes that his flailing has pushed the lid of the stone casket aside. "Sh-shit," Izuku whispers, anxiety spiking. He sets the flashlight down again, face up, the light dispersing throughout the tomb enough to give the place a dim glow. "Shit, shit, shit—"
Hands shaking, Izuku approaches the cracked casket and tentatively peers inside. He expects to see some withered husk of a thing, or maybe nothing but bones and dust given how old this tomb seems—he's very much not expecting what looks like the perfectly preserved corpse of a man who couldn't have died more than a year ago.
Izuku blinks, squinting. The flashlight glow is dim, but from what he can see it's a man with long, dark hair and a riot of stubble. The white and black yukata he's wearing is shockingly pristine, pale hands folded calmly over his stomach. There are no signs of decay at all, not beyond the ashen white of the corpse's skin. Unable to help himself, curiosity ad incredulity flaring, Izuku reaches forward and touches the man's cheek. The flesh is stone cold—not quite icy, but certainly not full of warmth. There's a bit of give there too, the flesh porcelain but still somehow soft.
Brow furrowing, Izuku slides his hand down to press two fingers to the corpse's white neck. He's no sure whether he's surprised or relieved to find no pulse.
Izuku barely has time to register this however, because mere seconds later a hand snaps out and fists in his uniform jacket, yanking him down and in to the coffin. Izuku yelps, panic spiking, as he crashes onto the cool body settled in the slab, mouth opening to scream as the stone lid of the casket slams back into place.
But no sound escapes his mouth, because in the sudden darkness he feels teeth slice into his throat—before pleasure overtakes him.
Izuku gapes at nothing as a solid arm latches around his waist, tight enough to bruise and yet somehow still seeming absentminded. The subtle rasp of stubble rubs against his neck, and Izuku smells the faint scent of blood as lips move and hum quietly against his pulse. The electrifying feeling of heat spiders out from the point of contact, spreading through Izuku's body and pooling in his gut. Izuku's eyes flutter, a weak noise escaping his mouth as his hands flex and paw at the chest of the-the thing beneath him. He's not sure whether he means to push it away, or draw it closer.
Izuku feels his blood spilling slowly down his neck, thick and hot, and the pieces slot together in his bewildered, fuzzy mind.
Vampire.
He is locked in a tomb—a coffin—with a monster of legends. It's feeding off of him, stealing his blood, likely killing him...
But Izuku can barely bring himself to care.
A ragged groan scrapes out of his throat as the vampire sucks out his lifeblood, ecstasy filling him in its place. He feels his cock stiffen, pressing tight against the seam of his pants as Izuku's eyes roll back in delirious elan. Through the haze, his ever analytical mind notes that the man's hands are skating up and down his sides, one fisting loosely in his hair to pin his head at a better angle. The chill of the corpse's skin is slowly being replaced by warmth, siphoning off Izuku's body heat as well as his blood.
Izuku gasps as a leg juts up beneath him, a muscled thigh slipping in between his legs and pressing against his erection. The pressure makes him tremble, little hiccups of sound lilting out of his mouth as he instinctively rocks his hips down in helpless little jerks, each movement giving him another jolt of pleasure.
A tongue swipes over his bloodied neck, the white-hot bliss of those teeth leaving him for a moment as the monster beneath him cleans him up. Izuku whines at the loss, a quiet desperation striking through him.
'No, no, come back, I'm almost...'
He moans shakily as he feels those fangs pierce the other side of his neck, drawing out his blood and sending him high once more.
"A virgin...?" a low voice purrs, sleepy and bemused and...in his head?
The hands on him tighten, and Izuku whimpers as it sends another spike of arousal through him. He has the vague sense of shame, of embarrassment, at the way he's humping the man's leg, rubbing the tent in his old jeans against the silky white fabric of the man's yukata—but it's a faint sensation. His anxiety is drowned out by the sheer amount of ecstasy coursing through him. Izuku feels it building in his stomach, coiling in his gut as his toes curl and his thighs clamp tight around the muscled thigh beneath him.
He's close, he so close, he—
Red glow fills the space, casting the figure beneath him in a crimson haze. His eyes are a brilliant, luminous scarlet, and the light of them makes the blood painting his mouth look black.
"Your lust..." the man rasps, hands skating up and down to fasten around Izuku's hips. His voice is low and wet, and Izuku can smell his own blood on his breath. "I can taste it."
Then the monster yanks Izuku's hips down, forcing him to grind up against the man's stomach. Izuku cries out, sobbing as the force, the crush, the smell sends him toppling over the edge of orgasm. He cums so hard his vision goes white, mouth open in a soundless wail as wave after wave of pleasure crests over him, shocking up his spine and curling in his scalp. He forgets to breathe for several precious moments, knocked breathless by it.
Vaguely, he feels the man's mouth on him again, trailing his tongue against the newest wound. Izuku's eyes flutter, and he collapses fully on top of him, lost in the afterglow. He's not sure whether the dizziness he feels is because of his orgasm or the blood loss, and he's not sure he particularly cares either. His limbs feel like jello.
"Mm, you're type O," that low voice muses, a hand trailing up and down Izuku's spine. "I thought it was merely that I hadn't fed in so long, but it's no wonder. Best way I've woken up in a long time." The hand pauses, and the red glow now saturating the inside of the coffin flickers. "Mind telling me what year it is?"
"It's..." Izuku begins, the question booting his brain back into gear. His thoughts begin to race as he blinks rapidly to clear his head, a myriad of questions and emotions and reactions flashing across his mind in quick succession. "I-It's 2237."
"A little over four hundred years this time," the man murmurs, brow furrowing in contemplation. "Odd. Someone usually wakes me up every turn of the century."
"U-Um, sir," Izuku tries after a moment, wriggling in mortification when he feels the mess he's made in his pants. "Can you, um, let me out now? If y-you're not going to finish me off?"
'Why would you ask that, WHY would you—'
"I would," the monster begins absently, licking a stray trail of Izuku's blood from the corner of his lips. He's looking at the faintest trickle of light that can be seen from the seam of the stone lid. "But it seems like it's still daylight out. The mausoleum must've collapsed..."
Izuku attempts to push himself up, but the idle hand on his back isn't as idle as he thought. Vampire strength, he realizes quickly. Biting his lip, he tries not to think of the bruises already blossoming on his hip. "No, that's just my flashlight! It's actually very late, so it's safe for you to let me out, I promise!"
Scarlet eyes narrow at him, grip tightening, and Izuku squeaks like a dog toy when those fangs scrape against his neck again. "You're not lying to me, are you? Little lust thrall?"
Izuku's face flushes brightly, and the man noses his cheek almost instinctively, as if following the blood flow. "I-I'm not! I'm not lying, I swear! Please, just—I don't want to die," he finishes weakly, hands fisting tightly in cloth pooling by the monster's sides.
The man's eyes soften slightly, and he sighs. The tang of warm iron feathers against Izuku's face. Reaching behind them both, the man swipes the lid to the side with one hand, the rough scrape of stone on stone making Izuku wince. Before Izuku can even move, he finds himself being hauled up and set outside the coffin on his feet. He staggers immediately, knees still weak, and nearly falls.
A calloused hand pushes against his back, keeping him upright. Izuku swallows and blinks away the spots crowding his vision, stumbling away to pick up his flashlight.
He turns again, cringing at the wet feeling between his legs. The man is sitting up in his box, peering at him curiously. Unable to help himself, Izuku tentatively asks, "So... you're n-not going to eat me?"
Tipping his head, the man gives him a hooded smile, dark hair shadowing his face as he answers, "Not anymore than I already have."
Izuku's face feels so hot he'd work well as a heat lamp.
The man steps smoothly out of his tomb and, to Izuku's surprise, folds into a bow. "Aizawa Shouta."
More habitually than anything, Izuku bows back. "Midoriya Izuku. It's, uh, nice to meet you?"
Aizawa smirks at him, the tips of his fangs flashing. "Well, Midoriya," he says, practically purring out the name. Izuku's breath catches. "Thank you for the meal. I hope you'll allow me the chance to taste you again. In a place where I can properly see you, this time."
With that, Aizawa rises from his bow and swirls into shadow, racing out of the doors of the mausoleum and leaving them banging open behind him. Moonlight spills into the tomb, and Izuku watches Aizawa's shadows zip through the cemetery and out into the night.
He has a feeling that he's just got himself into far more trouble than he knows.
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cat-and-fox-hub · 4 months
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❤꧁ღ⊱Merry Singles Day!⊰ღ꧂❤
Made by Cat, aka Researcher Serif/AW
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Ooh la la~! Two elites vying for your fair heart upon this bountiful day of love. Oh, such effort for just you too! How romantic~! Will you choose the recklessly brave yet passionate Cameraman? Mayhaps you prefer the ever pragmatic yet loyal Speakerman? Or.... will you let yourself be shared and taken by both~? Oh, decisions, decisions~
Yeah, these two are perfectly fine, idk what u talkin' bout cuz they're happily living and vying for your affections off screen is all /hj.
Either wae, I do hope you enjoy this. I tried out an experimental style this time with minimal shading and a bit moar effort on the background and props.
This was very indulgent as it also doubles as my birthday gift! If I can't find The Good Juice out there, I'll make it my goddamn self. Have a Merry Valentines Day everyone!
And here's a bonus close up on tiny cupid Dafuq-
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Check out my main blog: @researcher-serif
Here's my NSFW blog if that tickles your fancy: @grandfather-of-sin
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defectiveferalfreak · 2 years
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What Zim going to do with SpongeBob body parts ?
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better question what wouldn't he do if given a chance
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how2bmotorized · 9 days
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what a dude (his species thang is by @jeebusmeebus ,,,)
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todayisafridaynight · 11 months
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game time
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unboundbnha · 10 months
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Okay I’m gonna post something controversial
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motheryves · 5 months
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we not talking about utena's athleticism enough. this girl had to walk up hella stairs (in fucking bowling shoes), and she had to fight right after she got done walking up said stairs. not only that, but she has to run, dodge, and do all these fucking flips.
my girl needed a hot bath and epsom salt REAL BAD
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fanficlerontheroof · 1 year
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naughtynoodle056 · 2 months
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It's gonna be really funny if this gets like 40 billion notes cuz I made the blonde white boy fat this time LMAO /lh
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natileroxs · 6 months
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Usopp meeting Yasopp: tries to be civil despite his deep down frustration and abandonment issues
Sanji: two feet behind him charging up his strongest attack
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shaylarain · 4 months
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Sign of being terminally online is letting randos ruin your day because you ship something they don't like
Sign of being terminally online is caring very hard about what others ship that you make content for it, ya know? y'all just do you, you know?
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