#and i told jessica we have the same hometown and we love her over there and she was so sweeeeeeet

[sleevebuscemii]

met two very bad bitches today!!!!!!!!!!

#THEY WERE BOTH SO HOT AND SO NICE #arian was sooooooo #he was Glowing #he called me ‘my love’ twice and asked me where i was from (nonwhite solidarity!!!!) #and i told jessica we have the same hometown and we love her over there and she was so sweeeeeeet #AND BEAUTIFUL #im literally so happy #arian moayed #jessica chastain #(anyway my face is blacked out Yea because i dont wanna do a face reveal but also Yes because i do Not look cute) #(i was soaked to the bone and took it from my bad side lol) #m

[jerzwriter]

The Exes - Tobias & Casey

All of those who didn't get the brass (or diamond) ring...

Updated 9/11/2023

This contains information about Casey& Tobias's exes, but I only cover relationships (of varying degrees) that lasted 3 months or more or that are integral to their story.

If there are fics about their exes posted, they are linked under their couple bio.

Ryan was Casey’s “puppy love.” They were good friends, and everyone assumed they were dating, so eventually, they just did. It wasn't serious at all, as they both knew Casey was off to college in the near future. He is now a teacher/coach in their hometown, and she occasionally sees him when she visits home. They mostly keep in touch through social media. He is now married with a daughter and son.

Tomas was her first true love. They had the real deal, and even though they moved on, they (especially Tomas) still had feelings for each other. He was in love with Casey and was still hoping for another chance right up until he learned she was marrying Tobias. He flew in to see her after the attack and planned on telling her he still loved her, but she was in no place for that. Then she fell in love with Tobias, and Tomas respected that so he never said a word. They are still good friends, and Casey is still friends with his younger sister, Ava, as well. He eventually married a Congresswoman whom Casey very much approved of.

Jessica and Casey met her first year, and Jessica's second, in med school. They were friends, and eventually, it turned into more. Both had been heartbroken before, and they knew their residencies would likely pull them apart, so they agreed this wasn't to be serious or for the long term. But they fell in love, and during their 18-month relationship, each wanted to tell the other that they wanted to try to make it work when Jessica left for her residency, but neither ever did. Jessica's residency was in her home state of Colorado, and she and Casey agreed not to keep in touch at first so each could heal. About a year after they split, right before Casey was moving to Boston, they got in touch again and stayed friends from that point on. Jessica married a fellow doctor. Casey & Tobias would occasionally visit Jessica and her wife.

Casey & Jess Masterlist

Jeremy was an attending physician at U Penn/Penn Presbyterian Hospital. Casey met him when they were both volunteering at a local community clinic. This was a classic rebound for Casey. She was looking for something to distract her from missing Jessica. Jeremy developed deeper feelings for Casey, but he never expressed them to her because he knew they were not returned. In time, we learn he and Tobias were college friends. Something no one figured out until he ran into Casey & Tobias at a Howard fundraiser. Jeremy is now an oncologist at Mt. Sanai in NYC, and his wife is a surgical nurse at the same hospital. The couples tend to meet up a couple times a year.

Bryce and Casey were (are) the best of friends from day one. In the first few months, they knew each other, they'd occasionally end up making out after a few drinks, but it didn't take long for them to realize they were better as friends. And they stayed the very best of friends for the rest of their lives.

Ethan and Casey felt a strong connection to each other as soon as they met, but it was a complicated situation since she was an intern, and he was her attending. They fought their feelings for one another, nearly giving in during a medical conference in Miami. As they cared for Naveen, their bond grew, and when Ethan quit, and she was suspended from Edenbrook, they finally surrendered to the desire they had for each other. The affair was passionate but brief, as Casey's suspension was lifted and Ethan was rehired. Both were crushed that they would have to end things, then one night, Ethan told her he'd figure a way for them to work it out. A little over a week later, he left for a WHO mission in the Amazon without telling Casey. When she found out, just like any other resident, she was devastated. When he didn't answer her calls or texts, it only made things worse. She spent the first month after he left brokenhearted and angry, but then she said enough. With the assistance of her friends, she started putting herself back together. Upon his return, he told her he wanted to "reset" their relationship, and she told him there was nothing to reset. She was still hurt but never let him see it. She knew her worth and was not going to allow herself to be treated this way. Initially, their relationship was icy and strictly professional, but in time they were able to rebuild a close friendship. Not long after his return, Ethan came to regret his decision, but he saw Casey was moving on, and he respected that. He and Tobias rekindled their friendship, and the three became very close, almost family.

Casey x Ethan Fics: Moving On When Ethan left for a WHO mission without saying a word to Casey, then returned with a "reset" in mind, he told her that he wanted her to move on. Now that she has, he's not taking it too well.

Kerry and Tobias have known each other from the time they were toddlers. Their families were close friends, and they attended the same prestigious private high school together. They became high school sweethearts went to the prom together, and their families were thrilled. Perhaps too thrilled. The pressure made both realize that they were too young for anything so serious, and they decided they were better off as best friends. She is now an attorney in Arlington, Virginia, where she lives with her husband and children. Their families remain close. Kerry is one of Tobias's best friends and, along with Sasha, was pivotal in helping him get Casey. She now loves Casey like a sister, too.

Tobias met Kara at Howard University. They were assigned to a project together, and they were the only two in the group that took it seriously. They began dating and were exclusive for a year and a half. Tobias never cheated on Kara, but he was definitely flirting in grey areas, and Kara was growing tired of it. When she called him out one last time, he realized it wouldn't work and called things off. It was not pleasant, and they did not maintain a friendship. She is now one of the top attorneys in Washington, DC.

One night Tobias, Ethan, and a few friends drove to a bar about 20 minutes away from Hopkins, and they were all delighted to have Mandy as their bartender. They all flirted relentlessly, but the only one who scored her phone number was Tobias. She worked as a model and a bartender and attended a local public college part-time. From the start, they were both clear that this was just fun, no strings. Their arrangement lasted on and off for two years (ending when Mandy started dating someone, but she always called Tobias the second things didn't work, and he was always happy she did. During his last year of med school, they both decided the arrangement had run its course. They kept in touch via social media, and she would stop in to see Tobias if she was in Boston. Casey did get to meet her, but they don't keep in touch. Mandy now lives in New York & LA, where she is a talent agent.

Vincenza was the woman that both Ethan & Tobias fell for early on during their time at Hopkins. While they both fought for her, Ethan eventually won, and they were together for two years. While they were happy, "Cenza" didn't feel Ethan made her a priority. She started to think Ethan wanted to be with her to spite Tobias more than anything else, so she called things off. After the breakup, neither Tobias nor Cenza wanted to date each other, but they had become close friends and were spending more time together. One day, they gave in. Tobias really cared for her, and they had a good thing, but Tobias & Ethan's competition was turning toxic and Cenza was caught in the middle. One night Tobias made a stupid comment about her when trying to one-up Ethan. He immediately regretted it, but it was too late. She was over both of them and didn't speak to either again until years after Hopkins.

Tobias x Vincenza Fics: In Another Time: As their time at Hopkins comes to an end, one night changes everything.

Sasha was Tobias's only serious relationship after med school. She began working in public relations at Kenmore during Tobias's second year of residency. They were instantly smitten with one another, and lunches turned into dinners, which turned into nights together. Sasha was falling in love and wanted a future together. As their one-year anniversary approached, Tobias knew he'd have to make a choice. He really considered a future with Sasha (and his mother really encouraged him to), but Tobias came to the realization that he didn't want to be in a serious relationship - ever. They were on vacation together when Sasha told him she loved him and wanted to know if he felt the same way about her. He said he loved her, but not in the way she wanted, so they went their separate ways. Tobias felt terrible because he adored Sasha, and if anyone could have been it, it would have been her; but he just couldn't do it. After their break-up, he was committed to never becoming committed to anyone. Initially, Sasha was hurt and not a fan of his; but in time, they built a very strong friendship. She met Kerry when she was visiting Tobias, and the three of them were all very close friends.

Audrey was a new nurse at Kenmore. She was simply gorgeous, and everyone desperately wanted to be with her. So Tobias made it his mission to make sure he got there first. It wasn't much of a challenge because she was very into him. Sparks flew between them. In many ways, he met his match in the red-headed beauty. She had a voracious sexual appetite and no desire to be tied down to anyone. Their sexual relationship lasted for four years, with varying degrees of frequency. Sometimes, they'd hook up three times a week; at others, months would go by where they had no contact at all. For Tobias, it was the perfect arrangement, and he never wanted it to grow into more. But after about two years, Audrey would have loved for them to develop into something more. They were never committed, but if Audrey found out Tobias was seeing someone else, she'd get jealous and stir up some degree of trouble, especially with Casey. She'd also get annoyed that Tobias didn't care if she was seeing someone else. Audrey was dating someone shortly before he started seeing June, and that marked the end of their relationship.

Audrey Fics: A Mixed-Up Valentine (Intern Year) Tobias Carrick x F!OC, Casey MacTavish, AudreyKenner - They hadn't met yet... but what happened on Casey & Tobias's last Valentine's Day without each other? See how Casey's night went... how Tobias's did... and how they intersected. Mostly Pleasant Surprises Tobias x Casey (sort of), Audrey Kenner - It’s Tobias’s birthday, and his good “friend” Casey is not sure what to do about it. With the help of Sienna, she came up with a great idea, but will someone bring it all crashing down at the end?

June. We all know about June. I HC they met at a conference, where he was representing Kenmore and she was representing Edenbrook. It was sex at first sight. This was another strictly sexual arrangement that lasted around eight months. Tobias called things off after he met Casey. While June had no interest in him outside of carnal engagement, she enjoyed their setup and was not happy he ended things, and that's before she learned that Casey was the reason why. She definitely created problems for them, not because she cared, but because she enjoyed toying with them. Tobias was furious at her for leading Casey to believe he was sleeping with June while seeing Casey, but at that point, Tobias had made other mistakes and Casey had no reason to forgive him. This led to their initial breakup.

June Fics: Entanglements Tobias x Casey (feat. June Hirata) They’re still in the getting-to-know-you stage, and so far, they love everything they see and hear…even when Ethan and June come up. But, when Casey shares a medical miracle she encountered, Tobias’s interest is piqued. Could there be trouble ahead? Checkmate Tobias x Casey (feat. June Hirata) - After Tobias steals Casey’s patient, she looks to settle the score. But will that level the playing field to give them another chance? Or will new discoveries cement them in the past?

Casey & Bryce were very close friends. After the "reset," it took time, but eventually, she and Ethan re-established a close friendship. In time, he and Tobias rekindled theirs as well, so it was no surprise that Casey would save the two of them, and no, she wasn't going to pick. Same with Tobias in regard to Kerry & Sasha are his dearest friends and he's saving both.

Casey never had any bad experiences. Ethan was the hardest and they're friends now, so she doesn't dislike anyone. Tobias dislikes June because of the trouble she created for him and Casey. He knew how much it hurt Casey, and while she got over it, Tobias never really did.

Tobias doesn't dislike any of Casey's exes, and although Casey isn't fond of June and she really disliked Audrey at first, though, that improves in time. Casey is friendly with all of her exes but closest to Ethan and Bryce. Tobias is still close with Kerry, and in time he and Sasha became friends too.

Casey's family adored Tomas, and though they didn't think they'd get married so young, they hoped they would in the future. Tobias and Kerry's families have been friends for generations, so their families were praying for a "merger".

Casey was happiest with Tomas and Jessica. She truly loved them both, and if not for timing, either could have been her forever. Tobias recognizes his relationship with Sasha could have been much more if he wasn't relationship-adverse at the time, but he knows they wouldn't have worked out.

The breakups with Tomas and Jessica were very painful because they really loved each other, but the breakup with Ethan was the most difficult for Casey because he gave her no say and handled things so poorly. Tobias feels Sasha's was the worst because, although he was happy to be single again, he hated hurting her.

Jessica was very funny, and she and Casey used to get into all sorts of hijinx together. Ethan was easily the smartest (which is saying a lot because everyone she was with was brilliant). Tomas had a heart of gold. For Tobias, Mandy was a real party girl and knew how to make people laugh, Kara was brilliant, whereas Sasha was one of the kindest people he'd ever known.

Casey said Kiss Jess because she was a phenomenal kisser, and marry Tomas because they would have been ideal if they met at another time... then she said she'd also be happy to switch that to Kiss Tomas and Marry Jess. She doesn't dislike any of her exes so there was no kill. Sasha wins kiss and marry with Tobias, because he thinks that could have been a good thing, and June gets kill - though he probably wouldn't REALLY kill her :)

Permatags: @barbean @binny1985 @bluebelle08 @bluerosesbloom @brokenmemoriesblog @charisworld @chemist-ana @crazy-loca-blog @custaroonie @everybodyscreamsposts @genevievemd @icecoffee90 @jamespotterthefirst @jennieausten @kachrisberry @kalinahonore @lady-calypso @liaromancewriter @mia143 @mjlbwork @mm2305 @phoenixrising308 @pixelberrygirl @potionsprefect @schnitzelbutterfingers @secretaryunpaid @shewillreadyou @shygirl4295 @socalwriterbee @thegreentwin @toadfrog26 @txemrn @wanderingamongthewildflowers @spookycolorpeanut @mainstreetreader

@openheartheadcanons

OH Tags: @a-crepusculo @aishwarya26 @alina-yol-ramsey @chaoticchopshopheart @coffeeheartaddict2 @dorisz @kat-tia801 @lucy-268 @panda9584 @parisa-kh @queencarb @swiminthegarden @youlookappropriate @sillydg @rosebudde

#newlywed games with bree #newlywed games #tobias carrick #tobias x casey #tobias carrick x casey mactavish #the exes

[castielsshield]

Sutton

Title: Sutton (Leave A Message Part 3)

Pairing: Female OC/Sam Winchester

Synopsis: After losing Jess, Sam continues to leave messages on her phone as a coping mechanism. Unbeknownst to Sam, that number has been adopted by another person.

Word Count: 1,871

Warnings: None

Part 2 || Part 4 || Masterpost

— • —

   May 14th, 2006 - 8:13 p.m

     “Hi, babe. Dean and I went after a werewolf earlier today. I almost messed up the entire hunt. I had gotten to know the werewolf before we knew she was the monster, so I didn’t shoot her when she came after me. I just stood there and watched her come after me. I couldn’t see her as a monster. I only saw her as the girl I had previously been protecting. I’m sorry, Jess. I wish I had stayed away from you. If I had, you might still be alive. Sure, you would be with someone else, and I would be alone, but at least you would be alive. For that, I’m sorry.”

     May 27, 2006 - 10:18 p.m

     “Hey, Jess. Dean and I pulled over for lunch by the ocean today. It reminded me of the first time you took me to the beach. Do you remember that? I cried when I first stepped into the water and felt the waves. I know you saw, but you pretended not to notice. I don’t think I ever said thanks for that so, thank you, Jess.”

     June 6th, 2006 - 5:29 p.m

     “Hey there, Jess. I wish you were here, babe. I think Dean’s not telling me something. I don’t know what it is, but I’m so worried, and I don’t know what to do or what to say. I need your help, Jess. You were so good at figuring out a way to convince people that it was okay to tell you their secrets. I remember you wouldn’t even tell me what was going on if the other person wasn’t okay with it. I just don’t want Dean to get hurt. I wish I could get your help, Jess. I miss you.”

     June 7th, 2006 - 6:37 p.m

     “Jess, you wouldn’t believe what just happened. Well, maybe you would. Dean ate five burritos at dinner, and now he’s locked in the bathroom. The thing I left you a message about yesterday, how I thought Dean was keeping something important from me, he was just deciding what he wanted to eat five of today. I still wish you were here. I still miss you. I love you, Jess.”

     July 16, 2006 - 7:06 a.m

     “Jess, I don’t know what to do. We found Dad and saved him, but a demon hit us with a tractor-trailer when we were in the Impala. Dad is hurt, but he’s okay. Dean isn’t waking up and the-- the doctors are talking about taking him off of life support. A reaper is after Dean, but I can’t lose him. If Dean’s gone, I’ll only have dad left. Jess, do you remember what I told you about how dad used to treat Dean and me? What if he starts doing that again? What if-- what if dad tells the doctors to let Dean go? God, I wish you were here, babe. I need your help, Jess.”

     July 19, 2006 - 6:32 p.m

     “Jess, dad sold his soul. He’s gone. The last thing dad did was sell his soul so Dean could live. The demon that killed you and mom killed dad too. Jess, I’m losing everybody. What if I lose Dean too? I’m going to kill this damn demon. I’m going to kill it for killing mom and dad and you. I swear, Jess. I swear to you that I will kill this demon. I’ll kill it even if it kills me.”

     July 27th, 2006 - 1:09 a.m

     “Hey, babe. Dean and I hunted down a vampire nest today. I had to kill one as it stared right at me. I hope I never have to kill another one. When it looked at me, it seemed so human. I almost stopped and dropped my machete when it came after me. Its eyes were blue, just like yours. I miss you, Jess. I wish I were back at Stanford with you. I was so close to asking you to marry me, Jess. You would’ve been Mrs. Jessica Winchester. You would’ve been my wife. We would’ve been happy together. I would’ve been happy.”

     Those were the types of messages I got for the next couple of months. At first, I didn’t understand a thing about the werewolves or vampires. I especially didn’t know anything about the demons. However, my lack of understanding quickly mutated into motivation, yearning for knowledge. 

     I began reading old lore books. I bought everything from lore on werewolves to lore on angels and demons. I had my own money from selling my art and writing pieces online, so I never had to bring my father into the loop on what I was doing. 

     I would research one type of monster at a time, taking precise, organized notes about it as I read. I wanted to be able to reference the notes years in the future, so I kept the order of the records consistent. 

     The title of the page was the name of the monster, always placed at the top. The middle of the page was the signs and identifiers of that monster, how to kill it placed at the very bottom. On each side of that was a small column about half the size of the body paragraph. The right column was a rough sketch of the monster while the left column was filled with wardings, symbols, sigils, and other items that could be used against the monster.

     As I got farther along in my research, I decided to buy a laptop to help me research more and find signs of monsters around the country. I was also able to make copies of the lore pages in a document, so that will be helpful if I ever need to move around.

     After the message where the man revealed his last name, he began saying where he and his brother were going to ‘hunt’ the next monster. Every time I got a new location on the brothers, I would read up on the latest news articles of the town they were going to. Sure enough, every single time, the lore would match the signs in the town.

     As time went on, I learned more about the people that kill the monsters; Hunters. I learned what they did and how they moved around. I often found hunts around my state and the ones that surround it. Most of the time, I couldn’t hunt the monsters I found, but they still needed to be taken care of. My solution to that: inform other Hunters.

     At first, it was difficult to find other Hunters to pass the information to. But all I needed was one. Alexander Sutton is his name, and he was the key to my own life as a Hunter. 

     I first met Alexander when there was a string of odd killings in my hometown of Clayton, North Carolina. It was the end of February, a bit over a year after I got the first voicemail. I was at the gas station just down the road from my house. My dad was out on business again, and I had felt a need for something sour.

     I placed my sour gummy worms and bottled Coke on the counter, reaching behind me to pull out my wallet. As I twisted to my right, I caught sight of a newspaper headlining murders. I picked up the paper and began reading the first section of the article.

     ‘New Body Found By Police, Signature Matching Murders From Previous Months,’ read the headline. My eyes darted down to the sub-heading, and I inhaled as I read the bolded text. ‘Bodies Found In Clayton, North Carolina Without Their Hearts.’ 

     “Werewolf,” I murmured to myself, wincing as I remembered werewolves eat the hearts of their victims. I tapped the newspaper I was holding, signaling that I wanted to buy it as well. Pulling the cash for my purchases out of my wallet, I handed it to the cashier. He bagged my items and gave me my change. I gave him a tight smile and said, “thank you” before walking out of the building. 

     Before I made it out the door, I heard the man behind me rush forward and toss something light onto the counter. “Keep the change,” he said, pivoting on his heel and heading for the door as well.

     I was following the pale squares of the sidewalk away from the store when I felt a hand grab my shoulder. My body snapped around, and I took a step away from the person behind me. Instinctively, my left hand strayed to my back pocket, where I kept my new silver pocket knife. 

     Looking up, I realized the person who had grabbed me was the same man who stood behind me at the cash register. His eyes flicked to my hand, and he chuckled, taking a small step away from me.

     “Calm down, kiddo. I’m not trying to hurt you.” He leaned against the brick wall at his side, and he looked down at me. “You’re a Hunter.” It was a statement, not a question.

     “I’m more of a researcher, so far, but yes. I’m a Hunter,” I responded, mirroring his actions of leaning against the side of the building. I looked up at him, meeting the intense gaze of his grey eyes. ‘I might be young, but I’m not ignorant,’ I thought to myself.

     I hooked my thumb in the back pocket of my jeans, keeping my other fingers wrapped defensively around the knife. “I take it you’re a Hunter too.”

     “Yes, ma’am.” The man pushed himself off of the wall, extending his hand towards me. “My name is Alexander Sutton. I’ve been a hunter for fifteen years now. I started when I was twelve, so a bit younger than you, I’m guessing.”

     Reaching out, I clasped his hand in mine and gave it a firm shake. “I’m Ashley Whitman, but I go by Ash.” As I pulled away from Alexander, eyes focusing on his once again, I noticed the shock registered on his face. 

     His eyebrows furrowed together as he squinted his eyes. “You said your last name is Whitman?” 

     “Uh, yes. Is something wrong?” I questioned, my head quirking to the side.

     Alexander rubbed his hand down the side of his face as though trying to brush away a thought. “No, nothing’s wrong. I, uh, I just confused your last name with the name of another Hunter. That’s all it is.” He flashed me a grin, using it as an ending to his reassurance. “So, Ash, you seem to know quite a bit about hunting and I’m looking for a partner. Would you like to work on this case together?”

     I considered his offer for a moment before returning his grin with a crooked one of my own. “I don’t know. Would you be able to keep up with me?” 

     At my words, he threw his head back and laughed. Once he had regained his composure, Alexander stepped forward, gripping one of my shoulders in one hand. “I think we’re going to get along just fine. You’ve got potential, kid. You could go far in the hunting world.”

#supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #Sam Winchester #sam winchester x original female character #original female character #significant character death #which you will note is different from major character death #dean winchester #castiel #castiel winchester #castiel novak #DEANCAS

[homeformyheart]

until now - m!raleigh carrera x mc (plat)

author’s note: trying my hand at a shorter piece and for platinum – there will probably be at least one follow-up to this but both will stay as one-shots.

copyright: all characters owned by pixelberry studios. songs and lyrics owned by their respective creators. series/pairing: platinum – raleigh carrera x mc (cadence dorian); mentions of jessica clark (red carpet diaries mc) rating/warnings: 13+; swearing, infidelity, angst word count: 1.7k based on/prompt: “should’ve said no” by taylor swift summary: raleigh gets too drunk and too close to a fan and the only real relationship he’s ever had falls apart.

until now

cadence could recall exactly where she was the moment r&b’s timebomb blew up the internet. she couldn’t recall with detail how she felt or how she reacted in that immediate moment but she could describe the exact shade of brown from her morning latte that stained the open page of her notebook because she stared at it for a solid five minutes after the headlines broke. she was working on a new single for her upcoming album that needed an angsty, heartbreak vibe to balance the upbeat, love-focused songs she had already written. she had a few lines written (it’s strange to think the songs we used to sing / the smiles, the flowers, everything) but had been struggling with motivation to come up with anything more – after all, she hadn’t been heartbroken in a while.

she was happy in her relationship with raleigh and where she was in her career. her first world tour had been a huge success, with raleigh joining her on tour as often as he could. after her tour was over, he insisted he didn’t want to wake up in his apartment without her and it didn’t take long before cadence moved into his penthouse. a few months later, she was able to join raleigh for the beginning of his transformation world tour, his first album since deciding he could embrace the things he enjoyed from his sunset skatepark days, making it his most personal project to date. of course, whenever the music and obligations to the studio called her back to new york, they facetimed as much as they could.

dating cadence had given raleigh some of the “good boyfriend” brownie points with the public related to loyalty and affection. it helped that cadence defended him against unfair accusations and doubled down on how well he treated her to the media and their fans. and no matter what part of his reputation was theme-of-the-week over at the tabloids – shameless flirt, heartbreaker, wild card, adrenaline junkie, to name the popular ones – raleigh never gave anyone a reason to label him as a cheater and more importantly, never gave cadence any reason not to trust him. even in his fake relationships, raleigh made sure that that part of his reputation was sterling. until now.

her phone had buzzed non-stop when the news broke – to the point where she thought she was getting phone calls that sounded like a ticking time bomb but they were mostly texts and social media notifications. the headlines filled her feed one after another – “raleigh carerra cheats on cadence dorian!” “did ralence break-up?” “was cadence too boring for raleigh?” “cadence drives raleigh into arms of another woman!” – along with hundreds of theories painted by devastated and thirsty fans alike who picked apart every public appearance, interaction, social media post, and song lyric associated with the two of them for the past six months as if they could find incriminating clues and signs of a slowly fizzling relationship like amateur sleuths. cadence had to give them props – it’s not like she wouldn’t eventually do the same once she was ready to process the relationship; in some ways, the fans gave her a head start.

how was she supposed to react to this right now? the photos and videos definitely highlighted that sabrina simmons, who cadence vaguely recognized as a media-hungry and wannabe actress from one of raleigh’s older music videos, cozying up to and grinding on raleigh at a club in london, presumably the afterparty for the closing night of his tour. cadence could also point out every tell-tale sign that raleigh was drunk out of his mind; he was relishing in the attention from sabrina and being inappropriately handsy for someone in a well-known, committed relationship. what most people didn’t know, was that cadence could forgive that – raleigh was normally flirty and handsy and alcohol always exacerbated it. what she didn’t think she could forgive was the next thing she saw – or rather heard.

if cadence felt like she was close to either having a raging smash-everything-breakable-in-raleigh’s-apartment spree or an emotional-because-her-heart-was-actually-breaking meltdown, the audio clip that hit her inbox pushed her to the teetering edge of both. the recording was barely 15 seconds long but it was damning. given the circumstances, it was probably planted or planned by sabrina who wanted to catapult herself into internet fame by taking advantage of raleigh’s reputation. her voice could be heard asking him if he wanted to come back to her hotel room. the question didn’t matter to cadence though, because raleigh’s response – “fuck yes” – was clear as day and cadence knew it would haunt her for months to come.

[jessica: just saw the videos – u ok? i’m heading home to iowa for a break from work, come stay with me, no one will find you there]

cadence quickly typed out a text reply, grateful for the close friendship she had with jessica clarke, the actress-turned-director who directed the music video for her last single. there was only one call she needed to make. if anyone was already putting things in motion, it was fiona. right on cue, she picked up and before cadence could say two words, said, “i’m so sorry cadence. i’ve already got movers on the other line and hank’s on his way.”

“thanks fiona. i’m going to stay with jessica in iowa and lay low for a bit. raleigh is not allowed to find out where i am; i will get a new phone if i need to,” cadence said, calmly starting to pull out and sort her things from raleigh’s closet so the movers would know exactly what to pack while she ironed out a few more details with fiona.

raleigh was still way too drunk when his manager barged into his hotel room and forced him into the shower. he was very drunk when his security team had to half-drag him all the way to where the private jet was waiting at the airport. he was mostly drunk throughout the eight-hour flight back to new york and progressed to staggeringly hungover by the time he was in a private car heading back to his penthouse apartment. once raleigh felt like he was only massively hungover, he pulled out his phone to text cadence. he became only mostly hungover after seeing that his texts weren’t going through. in a matter of seconds, his now slightly hungover state took a backseat to the anxiety filling his stomach as he tried calling to no avail. he frowned as he opened his news feed. the headlines alone made his eyes widen but the videos were what sobered him up the rest of the way.

a new email in his inbox from cadence caught his eye. it was an audio clip and a straightforward message: just so we’re clear, our relationship is over.

cadence was halfway to the airport when she saw the incoming call from an unknown number. she knew it was probably raleigh since she had blocked his number, but she answered the call anyway. she knew she was going to need the closure, may as well get it out of the way.

“cadence? it’s me, please don’t hang up. i’m so sorry, babe. i have no idea what happened, believe me. i woke up in my own hotel room alone, i promise,” raleigh begged, the pit in his stomach had lodged itself in his throat, threatening to turn into tears.

she chose to ignore what he just said. if she let herself pull at that thread and dig into it further to see if it was the truth, she’d never be able to end things cleanly. “tell me this – was she worth it? was she worth this?” she asked, her voice hardened as a reminder to both herself and raleigh that he couldn’t sweet talk his way out of this one.

“of course not. i was black out drunk and don’t remember anything, i swear. all of the stuff in the videos and photos, it was all just—” raleigh’s voice softened, “a moment of weakness.”

“that’s convenient since i’m pretty sure this wasn’t an isolated moment,” cadence said in a clipped tone, examining her worn nail beds. she made a mental note to ask jessica for salon recommendations in her hometown. “do you honestly expect me to believe we could ever be the same?”

“i love you, cadence. i would never cheat on you, babe – you have to believe me,” raleigh pleaded, swallowing his pride at the fact that he was begging right now.

cadence let out a dry, humorless laugh. “i don’t have to do anything, those recordings speak for themselves. you should’ve known that what you did with her would get back to me. and you know what i think? you knew what you were doing. you actually had everything you could’ve ever wanted – the fame, fortune, and creative freedom that comes with success in this industry and something real with someone who cares about the real you, not the curated, fake version of you.”

she paused to take a deep breath and blink back the tears pooling in the corner of her eyes. keep it together, cadence, she told herself. “and it scared the shit out of you, didn’t it? it got too real for you because having something real and precious as love in your life also means you could lose it too. and even the thought of that happening made you feel so vulnerable that instead of treasuring and protecting it you decided to utterly destroy the only real relationship you’ve ever had. congratulations – you’ve perfected your bad boy reputation and collected the last trophy you needed, cheater.”

her words cut right through him. “i— i’m so sorry, cadence,” raleigh whispered into the phone. “i swear, i don’t remember saying yes to her or even doing anything with her. please just, tell me what i need to do to fix this.”

the audio recording replayed on loop in cadence’s mind. after a long pause, she whispered back, “you should’ve said no.” the finality of cadence’s tone was punctuated by the beep from his phone indicating she had hung up.

raleigh stood up from the couch where he had sat while on the phone with cadence. as he walked toward the bathroom, he finally looked around his apartment and realized that all of her stuff was gone. the apartment was empty, quiet, almost sterile with its clear surface areas and shiny, clean floors. it was like she had never lived here; his closet didn’t have the hint of jasmine from the perfume on her clothes, his sink counter was devoid of her jewelry and makeup, his music room wasn’t drowning in loose sheets of paper covered in her handwriting, and worst of all, the clothes she always borrowed of his, including his oversized tour shirts and sweatpants, were folded neatly on his bed.

he reached into the back corner of his closet, the side closest to the door, where no one ever stored or looked for anything until he found his gym bag. his felt around the old shirts in the bag until his fingers wrapped around a small, velvet box. he didn’t have to open it to recall the vivid five-carat emerald-cut diamond ring he had planned on proposing to cadence with. he held the box against his forehead, hand clenched around it, before throwing it as hard as he could out the bedroom door into the living room, twisting and turning his body from a crouching to an upright position in one smooth motion. maybe he should’ve been a baseball pitcher instead. it hit the far wall with a resounding thud.

the echo reverberated throughout his living room until it was met with silence, once again reminding him that he was utterly alone. and for the first time in a very long time, he cried. raleigh carrera had never been heartbroken before. until now.

* * * * * mentions: @raleigh-edward; @dulceghernandez; @thegreentwin; @kat-tia801; @otherworldlypresents; @brycesgirl; @robintora;

#reposting for new blog #choices #pb choices #playchoices #raleigh carrera #raleigh x mc #raleigh carrera x mc #cadence dorian #raleigh x cadence #choices fanfic #choices fanfics #playchoices fanfiction #my writing #not twc #choices platinum #choices fic writers creations #raleigh carrera x cadence dorian #my choices fics

[hunterfm]

𝕀𝕟𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕕𝕦𝕔𝕚𝕟𝕘: Hunter Reid

( thomas doherty, cis male, he/him ) have you heard about HUNTER REID? they’re a TWENTY FOUR year old TEAM MEMBER in the QUIZ team. i don’t know what their last job was, all i know is that they’re originally from SEATTLE, WASHINGTON. carol in hr said that they’re kinda ARGUMENTATIVE and NON-COMMITTAL but jessica in marketing insists that they are CANDID and ARDENT. at the end of the day, no one is worthy of the instant hype here. i just hope they get achieve their dream of being PHOTOGRAPHY TEAM LEAD one day. According to the latest Vibez quiz, their Disney soulmate is PRINCE ERIC. 

hello wow!! I’m Jay, 22, est, he/him. I’m one of the admins here and I also play Hunter. All your apps were incredible and I can’t wait to plot and write with you SO!!! Here’s my man, Hunter. If you’re down to plot with my problematic boy here, just like this and I’ll hit you up for plots. 

𝑺𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒔

Full Name: Hunter Zachary Reid

Nickname(s): Hunt, Reid

Birthday: March 31st

Age: Twenty Four

Pronouns: He/Him

Gender: Cis Male

Sexuality: Bisexual

Height: 5′ 11″

Zodiac: Aries

Hometown: Seattle, Washington 

Position: Team Member

Team: Quiz Team

𝑯𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒚

Hunter was born to Alice and Zachary Reid. He was the second child and the only son. The family originally lived in Seattle, Washington. Both of his sisters were around his age. One a year or so younger and one a year or so older. They grew up very close to one another, even if they did get on each other’s nerves. His life was pretty perfect for the first few years. He never wanted for anything. His mother owned a charming boutique and his father was a very successful doctor.

He attended private school with his sisters and had a very active social life. From the time he was a child, Hunter was very charming. It didn’t matter if It was teachers, students, adults, or children. He seemed to have a way with words, a way of making everybody adore him.

When he was twelve, he noticed fighting between his parents. He assumed It was nothing, but their announced divorce later that year proved the theory wrong. The conversation didn’t go all that badly though. His mother took him aside after the family found out and told him that she loved him. They made a promise--- That even with everything going on, she’d never leave him behind.

She moved out the next summer. And he never heard from her again.

A lot of people thought the loss didn’t affect him because he held himself together quite well, even for a child. But he was hurting. His father was a good man, but he was a pushover. He let her leave. He didn’t fight hard enough. And his mother was his favorite, but she’d left him. She’d broken the promise. He didn’t feel lovable, no matter how many people insisted that he was. And that was a feeling he carried over into adulthood. Though It was masked by romance and charm.

He learned to show his feelings through his art. The shitty polaroid camera from his mother was the last birthday gift she ever gave him. The only gift from her that he held on to. That was what started his love of photography. Moments pass, but you couldn’t ever lose a memory. Not when it’s captured on film.

He enrolled in college at NYU and things really changed for him. It was a new start. That’s what he had convinced himself, anyway. As far as anyone else was concerned, he was perfect. His grades were perfect, his dates of the week were perfect, his photographs were perfect. And he’d even landed the perfect internship at Vibez during his senior year. 

He interned under incredible photographers, learning how everything works behind a huge company like Vibez. And when they asked him to stay? How could he say no! The job opportunity was perfect. Until he found out the photography team was full... and he would be placed in the Quiz team now that his internship was done.

𝑷𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚

Hunter comes off as very romantic. He can be charming, often masking his true intentions with people. A lot of his relationships feel like magic in the beginning only for him to fade away and grow dis interested. He sees relationships as art, as a moment in time, not as something work fighting for in the long run.

He’s been with a lot of people, and It usually starts the same. He doesn’t have many boundaries so when you’re with him, It feels as though you’re the only person in the world.

He will make you feel special one moment and completely replaceable the next. It’s a cycle he isn’t fully aware of, but it’s a cycle nonetheless. He wants love, he craves love. But at the end of the day, it’s far easier for him to not care that much and leave. God forbid someone else does It first.

However, working at Vibez (while originally a dream) has been a little bit of a nightmare. He’s been on the quiz team for three years now. Each time loosing that spot on the photography team to someone with more experience or with “a new outlook” which is what the execs call a family friend. This has made him charming outside of work, but rather grumpy while on the job. It’s almost like he’s got two different versions of himself.

The lovesick artist versus the bitter perfectionist. 

Romance, work and mommy issues aside, he can be a great friend. He's fun, charming, spontaneous, and will do anything to make someone smile. Even if he winds up hurting them in the end. Get used to having your photo taken though. He’s always got a camera around his neck.

𝑪𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔

Close friends

Childhood friends

Best friends

Ex Classmates

His older sister (would be 25/26)

His younger sister (would be 22/23)

Someone who isn’t a sibling but feels like one

Neighbors

Roommate

Cousins

Frenemies

Bad influence

Good influence

Drinking buddies

Flirtationship

Family Friends

Exes on good terms

Exes on bad terms

Friends with Benefits

One night stands

Almost lovers

and anything else we can come up with!

#vibez:intros #* #hello there !!!!

[wydmariana]

        hi my loves   !   ur  fav  big  mess  dani   here   ,  i  also  play  our  hailey  fc  alanna  heh   !   i’m  bringing  back  my  bbyg  mariana   !  she’s  my  original  wealthy  character  &  i’ve  had  her  for  like over  3   years   ,  i’m  super  excited  2  be  playing  her  again  &  i  hope  u  guys  rly  like  her   !!!  i’m  gonna  put  all  the   tea  on  her  under  the  cut  &  if  u  wanna  plot  like   this  &   i’ll  come  bug  u  , i  rly  always  need  connections  n  love  plotting  ♡  u  can  also  hmu  on  discord  !! @ 𝒎𝒈𝒌'𝒔 𝒘𝒉𝒐𝒓𝒆 .#1958

new york’s very own mariana cavello was spotted on broadway street in christian louboutins . your resemblance to selena gomez is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty fourth birthday bash . while living in nyc , you’ve been labeled as being stubborn , but also adroit . i guess being a gemini explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be  lyrics  scribbled  in  a  notebook  ,  gold  jewelry  ,  &  blue  nail  polish  . ( i  defeaned  a  girl  in  a  fight  when  i  was  17 )  &  ( cisfemale & she/her  )  +  ( dani , 20 , she/her , est . )

╰ ˚･ﾟ  ♡   𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒄𝒔   :

full name: mariana marisol cavello

nickname(s): mari,

age: twenty four

date of birth: june 4th

hometown: new york city

current location: upper east side, new york city

ethnicity: half mexican

nationality: american

gender: cisfemale

pronouns: she/her

parents names: alexander hastings, liliana cavello

orientation: pansexual but she doesn’t like labels

religion: grew up catholic, undecided

political affiliation: democrat

occupation: singer/songwriter

living arrangements: lives in her own mansion in the upper east side

language(s) spoken: english, spanish

accent: american

face claim: selena gomez

hair colour: x (most basic/accurate/but it changes)

eye colour: brown

height: 5″5

weight: 113lbs

build: petite

tattoos: mostly selena’s canon, but x instead of the music note

piercings: x (both ears)

drugs/alcohol/sex: yes/yes/yes

pets: one cat, 5 years old, named sergio - x

astrological chart  : gemini sun  ,  libra moon  ,  scorpio rising

character  inspo  :  meredith  grey  (  grey’s  anatomy  )  ,  simone  davis  (  star  )  ,  alyssa  (  the  end  of  the  fucking  world  )  ,  carla  (  elite  )  ,   kat  stratford  (  10  things  i  hate  about  you  )  ,  serena  vanderwoodsen  (  gossip  girl  )  ,  jessica  davis  (  13 reasons  why  )

pinterest  board  :  here .

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡  𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒚  &  𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕   (   tw  :  abuse ,   violence  , injury ,   sexual  assault .  )  :

ok i changed her around quite a lil bit so i’m excited to rEdevelop !  :~)

mariana was born into a seemingly perfect family ,  her older brother &  her having been born heirs to alexander hastings , billionaire hotel & business entrepreneur , shark-tank cast member  ( think kevin o’leary vibes .. yeah . ) &  liliana cavello , legendary supermodel  ( think cindy crawford )

she was spoiled bc they were rich af , so like she never NEEDED for anything , except LoVe :)

mari was quick to blow her dad’s money but did he notice ? no

she still is kjdfnsjdf

mariana was a happy child, but growing up in a household with her father quickly became toxic

she started noticing it when she was around 10

his yelling , his anger against her mother , the hostility towards the entire household

the relationship between her parents always had been toxic but now that they had kids it was quick to spread through the whole household

as mariana grew older and started high school , there were times where she would sit in one of the offices of her father’s buildings and do homework while she waited for him to finish so they could go home

at the mere age of fifteen was the first time one of her father’s co-workers sexually assaulted her in an empty conference room after everyone else went home & she’d be waiting for her dad

this continued for a little under  2  years .

this is when her behaviour at school started to get out of hand, she’d start skipping class, get caught smoking pot, talking back to teachers, etc

it went on for months & mariana suspected that her father knew and wasn’t doing anything to stop it

when she turned 16  &  got  a  boyfriend  , it started affecting her even more . she was struggling w being intimate bc of these things that  were happening to her

which is when she eventually  confronted him about it , in tears , in the kitchen with her mother

it resulted in a screaming match

mariana’s behaviour completely went off the rails after that day & she went to school one day & got into a fight with this girl who was taunting her

they fought and mariana’s anger got the best of her &  she ended up beating the girl so bad that she became deaf in one ear

shoutout to degrassi for the idea Ok female sean cameron in the house

( i needed a secret for mari n i was watching this so i was like .. ok why not lol )

she turned 17 shortly after this argument and by some miracle ( aka money ) her dad was able to keep her out of juvie despite the charges that were brought against her

this is mariana’s secret!!!!!

anyway now , she doesn’t talk to her father really , at all . unless her mom ambushes them into the same room which sometimes happens jkfnsf

mariana moved out on her 18th birthday ,  still has a good relationship with her  mom and brother  &   extended family

when mariana turned 18 was also when she started her career !! she started out as an actor in a few different movies

she got her big break when she starred in a ‘riverdale or like , grey’s anatomy’ type of show a few years ago prob when she was about 19

and that went on for 2 or 3 seasons before she stopped it to pursue music bc !

writing and singing and performing have always been Mariana’s passions & emotional outlet

anyway , she dropped a single while on the show & it did well so she proceeded to drop an album which also blew up

she is now rly successful w her music career and loves it sm , like it’s literally her dream come true ok

it’s the one thing that makes her happy

so yah , if ppl knew she deafened a girl totally wouldn’t b all sunshine n rainbows :/ hehe .

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡  𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚  (   tw  :  drugs  )  :

mariana is very lowkey crazy

like she knows how to hide it but girl , it’ll come out

she can definitely be a brat , she wasn’t raised with proper consequences & often thinks she can do whatever she wants , has a bit of an attitude about it

she hates being told what to do

and will voice her opinion

she is also the most loyal & loving person you know , but the thing is it’s very hidden deep down rn . she is completely walls up , doesn’t wanna let anyone get close to her bc she’s a PUSSY

and like , she hasn’t worked through her trauma & probably never will

the only opening up she does is when she’s writing music

daddy issues galore over here

but she’s a lowkey softie when she  waants 2 be

when she loves someone she loves fiercly !!

mariana . is a  . party . animal

it’s basically all she does

like every night , her stamina is insane bc she can go out every single night until 3 am if she really wants to .

and she’s fun too , if she’s going out she’s getting WASTED

she’s the type of drunk girl to make out w  all her friends

she loves cocaine, is most definitely an addict (   but who isn’t in this city  ), tequila is her alcohol of choice, but she’ll drink anything you give her & weed is her creative saving grace

we luv a bitch who doesn’t care abt her health !

u will most likely find her in sweatpants and a hoodie or a big tshirt

she will dress up to go out & luvs lookin cute for paparazzi & career stuff

um , she listens to a lot of rap and just lays in bed  w her cat smoking blunts

um n ya  .. sad bitch vibes :/

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡  𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔  :

i have  a wanted connections page here    &   a   wanted  tag  here  !!! i need & want every connection so pls hmu ! like this  &  i’ll come to you .

#wealthyhq:intro #omg <333 #come plot w me pls

[13-reasons-ideas]

Finding Peace in Another Part 10

A/N: I’m so sorry this part took so long. I have the next few parts written already so there will be regular updates in the next few weeks. Thank you for your patience guys. Feedback is appreciated. Also, who else is excited for Season 3? let me know your thoughts on the trailer and if you have any preliminary ideas of whodunit. much love

Zach wasn’t the only one I got close to in my short time at Liberty. I was able to bond with Alex Standall. We connected quickly sharing stories of our respective hometowns. I supposed it was much like his connection with Hannah Baker in the beginning. We didn’t immediately become close like Zach and I did, but rather we built up a rapport and grew closer the more we spent time together. We regularly went for coffee or went to each other’s houses to study and watch movies. His parents kind of took me under their wing since my dad is out of town so regularly. Tonight was one of the nights I went to his place after school because Monty had practice and plans with Scott.

Alex and I were in his room working on math homework, or rather trying to work on math homework. Alex spent more time doodling than working out any of the assigned problems. “What did you get for number twelve Becca?” he asked, looking up from his paper.

“Five hundred sixty-two point eight.” I replied, looking back to that question. I heard him mumble a thanks and go back to his work. Around 5:30 we had finished over half of our work and decided to call it a night shortly before his mom called us down for dinner. Mrs. Standall had made a shredded kale salad and salmon with lemon potatoes. Maybe she thinks I can’t make myself healthy meals…. Dinner passes rather uneventfully, simply filled with small talk about our days and the scrape of metal forks and knives on the ceramic of the plates. Alex and I try to make our escape as quickly as we can before any more questions get thrown our way. As we retreat back to his room, I yell a quick thank you for dinner, before Alex shuts the door.

“Thank God that’s over. She was about two questions away from telling us that we would be cute together and then asking if we are a couple.” Alex complains to me as he plops onto his bed, stretching out.

“Hey, make room for me lover boy.” I joke in response to his comment about us dating. He makes a big show of moving over and groaning for dramatic effect.

“It’s my bed, I can stretch out if I want to.” He teases.

“True but you have a girl in your bed. A girl who your mom apparently thinks is your girlfriend or at least that I am not just your friend who is a girl and you see outside of school and stays over for dinner at least once a week.”

“I mean, yeah. You’re a girl in my bed, but its not like anything is going to happen…” He pauses and looks at me suggestively.

“No Alex. Nothing is going to happen.”

“Alright, it was worth a shot.” He says and I can hear the smirk in his voice. “Speaking of boys or girls in bed and what that means for a relationship, you’ve been at Liberty for a while now. Anyone you’re interested in?” Alex asks, seeming innocent but I’ve spent enough time with him and other boys to know otherwise. I need to think fast because I definitely cannot let him know about Montgomery. It would destroy our friendship if he found out like this. Not to mention how Monty would react to me telling someone we go to school with and see on a regular basis about us, without consulting him first.  

“Umm… not really no. I haven’t really been looking for anyone to be interested in. Not to say that I haven’t noticed anyone or not found anyone attractive, I just haven’t really been looking too closely and haven’t decided if I want to get to know anyone else on that kind of level, you know?” I lie, hoping that there is just enough truth in my statement that he believes it. It not technicallya lie. I’m not looking for anyone else to make that kind of connection with, just… not necessarily in the way he thinks I mean. He clearly wants to say more but I just shake my head and laugh. “When I’m interested in someone or decide to share that aspect of my life, I’ll let you know.” Deciding to call it a night, I gather up my things before confirming our weekly coffee plans with Alex and bidding him and his family good night.

As Alex and I grow closer, he begins to open up to me more. On one of our coffee dates at Monet’s a few weeks after he asks me if I’m seeing anyone, he opens up to me about Hannah. He tells me about the way he, Hannah, and Jessica were close as a group in the beginning and how as that year went on, Alex and Jessica grew apart from Hannah. I had heard about Jess and Alex from friends and around school but I hadn’t realized that they had gotten together and not told Hannah. He tells me about The List and how it caused Hannah more trouble than he expected it to. Alex goes on to explain how she left tapes for people and that while he couldn’t share what was on other people’s tapes, he could explain his side of the story to his own. He explained how her death impacted him and how she would still be here if he hadn’t made the stupid list. I silently empathized with his sentiments because I felt the same way about Jake. If I had done X, Y, Z differently, he would still be here. I tell him that even though it feels like his fault, it really isn’t. That once someone gets to that point, they will use any reason they can to justify their decision and they will use whatever means necessary to achieve their goal. The same words the Constable told my Dad and I that day. I don’t tell him about losing Jake and how I too wish I had done things differently. Instead, I simply listen to him, hold his hand kindly, and get him another coffee. After he finishes his coffee we part ways, agreeing to meet each other at school later to watch the baseball game. After I get home, I quickly change into one of Montgomery’s extra baseball shirts. He left it at my place after practice one night. Making sure to throw a hoodie over top, I grab my purse and hurry out the door to meet Alex and Clay.  When I arrive I quickly spot Montgomery warming up and catch his eye. Giving him a quick nod and smile, I turn my attention to where I hear Clay complaining to Alex about being at a “stupid high school baseball game.” Alex laughs and tells him to live a little and enjoy himself while he can. Joining them, I settle in for what would end up being a very unsurprising win. Liberty beat their opponent, who were at the bottom of the division standings 7-1. Throughout the game, Alex is laughing and enjoying himself. He even cheers when Montgomery hits a home run much to my surprise. After the game, Montgomery makes a brief appearance at Bryce’s celebratory party before driving around the block and pulling into my garage. I make a point of congratulating him immensely for the game well played. We fall asleep in each other’s arms, my head against his bare chest, and me wearing his softest grey and red flannel.

#monty imagine #montgomery de la cruz #monty de la Cruz fanfic #montgomery de la cruz imagine #monty x oc #13 reasons why #Thirteen Reasons Why #finding peace in another #monty x reader #montgomery de la cruz x reader #so sorry this took so long #monty de la cruz fanfic #scott reed #thirteen reasons why #bryce walker #zach dempsey #alex standall #clay jensen

[elianas-cozycorner]

Where were we? (Jesse McCree/Reader) Part 1

This was requested by the lovely @miawolfo , who wanted a McCree with a female s/o who was once childhood friends/lovers with the cowboy and who, after they parted ways, got married and had a child. There’s a whole lot more to it, and you’ll see it as you read, but those are the basics. I had to make this into two parts because it was becoming waaay too long! I hope I did you justice on your request, sugar! I added some of my own headcanons for a childhood backstory, but please bear with me! Also, to be fair, Overwatch lore and ages make no sense.

Slight trigger warning for: mentions of abuse, cheating, and pregnancy. In case any of you may need them.

You giggle softly, leaning your shoulder against your friend. Young, inseparable rascals; that’s what your father called the two of you. Best friends through thick and thin, through hot and cold and dusk and dawn. You felt an utterly special connection to your friend, Jesse McCree. He was a young boy, two years older than you, about 10 years old, who adored old cowboy films and ranches. He was always outside, exploring and having fun, so you often joined him when you could. 

Right now, you were sitting in his makeshift tree hideout together; something he’d put together for what he called “angry days”. Angry days for who, you didn't know, you just knew he came here often. Actually, it was your go-to spot for when you wanted to find him. 

“We’ll always be friends, right, Jess?” You murmured, staring at the setting sun.

“Yeah.” He smiled, shoving you. “O’course we will!”

You found out three years later why he’d built that hideout, away from your neighborhood. It was because of his parents, and his father especially was awful to the poor boy. Now that you’d begun to understand your friend’s hardships and why he often had so many bruises, you became more aware, more gentle with him, you even took on a caring, familial role. You were 11 then, he was 13, and somehow you felt your friendship shifting. It was becoming different; you didn’t know how you could just feel it. 

“Jesse?”

“Yeah?”

“We’re still friends, right?”

“Yeah. Always, doncha remember?”

“Yeah.”

He was 15 now, starting to become rebellious. Your parents didn’t like that, they didn’t know why he was doing it, so they made you stay away. Well, they thought they were able to keep you away from him. You knew now, you knew exactly why your friendship had started to change. You had grown feelings for your friend, and he seemed to have done the same. You were still so inseparable.

It started out awkwardly, with your confessions for one another being full of stammering and red faces. But you started to outgrow that, you became his pillar and his light, he treated you right, with respect, with love, with care. It was going really well, really.

Then the next year rolled around. Your 14-year-old self had to take a step back. Jesse was starting to meddle with a gang well known in your area, and it worried you. But you still cared deeply for Jesse, so you continued to support him. You tried to help him, you did. Sometimes you thought you could and you saw progress, but he kept spiraling into the rabbit-hole. You told him, you said it right out.

“Jesse, listen to me!” You grabbed his arm, desperate to make him see. “This isn’t the right path to take! You’re almost 17, I’m almost 15, you should know better! We both should!”

“I have no clue what yer sayin’ to me.” He growled, pulling away. “This may jus’ be one o’ the best things in mah life!”

“This cannot be good! It’ll never be good!”

His voice rose. “Maybe yer wrong!”

You fell silent, you two never yelled at each other. You both knew that it never led to anything good, you saw what yelling and fighting had done for adults and people your age alike. 

“Sweetpea,” He began. “I’m sorry.”

“No.” You sniffled, taking a deep breath. “Talk to me again when you see that this won’t lead to good things.”

You thought that would’ve worked, that he would have tried. You were wrong.

You were back home, visiting your family. They had told you, you could stay with them as long as you needed to recover from... recent events. And now, you stood in their kitchen, thinking back to your childhood and your cowboy you missed dearly. You remember clearly the last words you said to him, his last expression, and, when you’d found out something had happened to him and some other deadlock members, how broken up you were about it. It’s been 15 years since you’d last seen Jesse McCree, and your heart still ached for him somehow.

You’d gotten married after a while, thinking you’d gotten over the man. That had been 9 years ago. The man you’d married was nice to you, he was handsome and willing to be there for you. You’d loved him, you had, but it was never like what you had felt for Jesse. Never. And now, here you are. Alone with a three-year-old daughter, and with a broken heart all over again. This time, the offense of the man you loved was greater than that of Jesse’s. Your husband had left you for another woman, whom he had been seeing for the last year and a half. All in secret, all because he thought that after having a child nothing had gone back to normal and, despite his desires to have a child as well, it just wasn’t for him. You knew the real reason though, and it broke your heart.

You had named your daughter Jessica since it had been up to you to choose the name. She was a beautiful girl, and from early on she had reminded you of McCree. She looked like you, her mother, but her personality was like the cowboy’s right from birth. Well, maybe not right from birth, but you could tell the spunk she’d have, mother’s intuition as they say.

McCree had recently been assigned to a mission in his hometown. He was both dreading the idea of going back into a town full of memories, good and bad, happy and sad, but was also looking forward to just getting the job done. He had set up camp in a hotel not far from where your favorite diner had been, but he tried his damnedest to push you from his thoughts. However, he couldn’t help the guilt that slowly crept through him when, in the back of his mind, a flicker of his abrupt leave flashed through his thoughts.

‘God damn it, McCree, what the hell did you put that girl through?’

‘Does she even choose to remember you?’

‘She was right.’

‘Find her, apologize.’

‘You can’t, she’s probably moved so far on without you.’

‘You were an asshole.’

Growling to himself, McCree decided it was time for some fresh air and a bit of a scope around the area. His mission here was to find, make tabs and reports on any Deadlock members, and to make sure that Blackwatch could clearly have a quick means of going in and out without alerting the whole city. Why? Because Overwatch was sending Blackwatch to eradicate the gang. 

“Time to get to work.” McCree lit a cigar, taking a step into the gloomy Thursday darkness.

Part Two Coming Soon!

#jesse mccree #mccree x reader #Overwatch #overwatch x reader #fanfiction #two parter #angst #potential fluff #overwatch fanfic #jesse mccree x reader #young love #pregnancy #love torn apart #deadlock #pre deadlock #blackwatch #blackwatch mccree

[cartoonishlullaby]

A Midwinter’s Night

Hey guys Im writing a Winter Snow fanfic, it was originally gonna be a oneshot but now I’m thinking I might continue it. 

Also before you read this, I’d suggest reading this headcanon post first if you haven't already, it provides some important backstory to this fic.

 From the day they met, it was destiny. The chilly and sweet-talking snow sprite who carried out winter storms from his ice castle somewhere in the north, and the once terrifying, cold-hearted warlock who was now quite a kind and agreeable creature. They were kindred spirits, I’ve heard people say. And it all started one cold midwinter’s night.

Never did Winter know that one day someone would let light back into his life, that someone being Kris Kringle himself. He remembered feeling years of darkness fall away with a single act of kindness. It was only a toy, a small gift, but to have someone actually think of him? Someone who still saw the good in him when even he had stopped believing in it himself? He hadn’t known how to feel. But he felt the warmth in his heart melting away the icy curse he had placed upon himself all those years ago. Maybe it really was time to change.

 But he was far from healed. His heart may have thawed, but it was still scarred. No magic in the world could change that. He kept it well hidden, but ever since his reformation he began to remember things.

 One night while he was lying asleep in his bed, he saw it once more. That night, that horrible night, when they came after him. He was only trying to help, he was only trying to save them, they didn’t listen, they didn’t listen, nobody would help him— 

 He woke up sobbing, burying his face in his pillow. He was too old for this, he knew it. But the last time he had a working heart he was practically a child. He had a lot of feeling to catch up on. 

Owning a heart certainly had its burdens. 

 One day Kris, or, Santa Claus, as he was now called, had invited Winter over to his house. Upon arrival, Kris told him, “Mr. Warlock, there’s someone we’d like you to meet.” 

 “Winter, please.” He said, but he knew at this point his old friend was never going to learn. 

 Kris continued, “My friend, the Snow Miser is coming to visit us today, er, by any chance have you heard of him?”

“No, I can’t say I have. Who is he?” 

“Oh he’s a real magic man, that one. He controls all the weather up here!” 

 “Well I think I do a fine job making it snow on my own.” 

“Well sure you do, Mr. Warlock, but wouldn’t it be nice to have some help?”

Winter didn’t get a chance to respond. Suddenly the loud BANG of someone kicking the door open rang out through the house. “Good heavens Snowy!” shouted Mrs. Claus, as she headed over to greet their newest guest. A tall man with icy white hair, a long pointy nose and kind, sparkling eyes entered the room. “Pardon me, I do like to make an entrance,” he chuckled, then bowed to kiss Mrs. Claus’ hand. Then, catching sight of Winter he exclaimed, “And who is this! You must be someone new, I never forget a face.” He went to shake Winter’s hand. 

 “I’m known as the Winter Warlock, but please, call me Winter.” 

 “Winter! Got it! Nice name!” And he smiled. He had a winning smile, the kind that gave you a certain confidence in yourself, that you didn’t get from other people. 

“Thank you!”

“So tell me about yourself, Winter? What brings you here?” 

“Well, Santa and the Missus wanted me to meet you.”

“Oh, I’m flattered! I just love meeting new people.” 

Kris turns to Mrs. Claus at this. “They seem to be hitting it off well,” he smirked.

Snow Miser at this point had retired to a nearby couch, and was prompting Winter to sit down beside him. Winter obliged.

“So what is it you do, Winter?” Snow Miser asked. 

“Well, I’m sort of a magician, you see.” 

 Snow Miser’s eyes widened. “What a coincidence! Me too! I thought I sensed it in you! Y’know, I can turn things to snow with the touch of my hand!” (upon overhearing this, Jessica had her fingers crossed that he wouldn't sing the song) “And I have a great, magical ice castle back home, with the equipment to do all kinds of neat stuff, I can send out a blizzard to anywhere in the world in no time!” 

 Winter sighed. “That’s fascinating, really, but does it ever get lonely, being all alone in that castle all day?” 

 Snow Miser paused. And for a moment, the fast talking entertainer was gone, and someone far more realistic, more vulnerable was sitting there on the couch. “Well I have my minions, but.. yes, I suppose it does get lonely. Sometimes I wish I had someone to share it with.” 

 Then he perked up. “But sometime you should come visit! It’s a wonderful place, really!” 

“I’d love to,” said Winter. 

“Great!”

 Soon Mrs. Claus called them into the kitchen, because dinner was ready. At the table, Winter and Snow Miser continued to talk, telling stories of the adventures they’d had, Winter narrowly skirting the story of his past, back when his heart was frozen. He said one day he just decided to move to live on the mountain, which was partly true, but he never told why. Santa and Mrs. Claus exchanged looks at this, but said nothing. A man’s past is his business, they supposed.

 Soon it was time for them to leave, but home was an awfully long way away on Snow Miser’s part, and the weather was terrible. While neither Snow Miser nor Winter would have minded the cold at all, it was also pitch black and snow was blowing like nobody’s business, if the cold didn’t bother them, it wouldn’t matter, they’d get lost in the dark. 

The Clauses insisted they spend the night, and Mrs. Claus showed them to the guest room. “There’s only one bed I’m afraid, I hope you two don’t mind, you could probably put a pillow in between yourselves if that would make you more comfortable.”

 Snow Miser brushed it off. “Oh Sugarplum, we’re adults, there’ll be no problem here!” he said, but then he turned to Winter, a look of concern on his face. “You’re not uncomfortable with this are you? If you are I’m sure I could sleep on the couch…” 

“No! It’s no problem at all! And thank you, Jessica, for letting us stay the night.” 

“Yes, thanks a bunch, sugarplum.” 

 “It’s the least I could do. Now sleep well boys.” She said, and closed the door.

 Winter yawned. “Well, we should probably get some sleep.” He crawled into bed. “Goodnight Snowy, it was really nice getting to know you today, I’ll see you in the morning.”

Snow Miser’s face lit up. “Hey, you called me Snowy! I like that. Did you get that from Jessica?” 

“Oh, well I suppose I might’ve picked it up from her tonight.” 

 “...It’s cute, coming from you.” 

 Winter froze. Snow Miser just smiled at him, then turned away to go to sleep, so he did the same. 

 But it wouldn’t last. The awful thing about dreams is that you can’t decide when to have them, what they’re about, or who is there when you have them. Oh how Winter had hoped for only pleasant dreams that night, or even a dreamless sleep, but that simply was not to be. 

 And he was seventeen again, in his old hometown again, and they were chasing him again, and they were dragging him through the streets, and he wanted them to let go, he was fighting them, and begging them to listen,, and then— 

 And then he was at the front porch of a house. He knew exactly what house too. It had been his last hope. This time he didn’t want to go to the door, he wanted to run away, he couldn’t take it again, but the dream wouldn’t let him, it had to play out every memory.

He saw his fists banging at the door. He heard his voice cry out to one particular resident of the house. “Joseph! Joseph it’s me! Open the door!”

Joseph answered the door, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, and gazed right past the frantic mess on his front step in horror at the oncoming mob. He then looked Winter straight in the eyes, who at this point pleaded to be let inside, for Joseph to take him away somewhere, to please protect him, he was scared, more scared than he’d ever been before, but Joseph just shoved him backwards into the snow.

“Joseph?”

“Get away from me. My god, what have you done now?”

“I was only trying to save them, they won’t listen, please let’s run away now. We can start over!”

“There’s no way I’ll do that! They’ve already seen me! They’ll have me dead by morning! And it’s all because of you! For your own good, you should get out of my sight. You’ve gone too far this time.”

“Joseph please, listen, the whole town is about to be attacked!”

“You sent someone to attack our town? You really are a mean and despicable creature, aren’t you.”

“No!! No... I didn’t... I’m trying to stop them, I—“

And then he was on his feet, running through empty streets with the mob on his tail, tears streaming down his cheeks, in air so cold he was sure they’d freeze to his face. Joseph didn’t care about him, nobody did, he should’ve known, he was so stupid, he was… he was… 

 He felt someone shaking him frantically. 

 “Winter?”

 He opened his eyes. He was back in bed, a worried Snow Miser leaning over him, the room glowing a pale red from the shade of the wallpaper. 

 “Oh, you’re okay, when you started screaming I was so worried!” 

“Was I screaming?” 

 “You sure were. It didn’t make any sense, but it sounded like something terrible was happening to you.” He paused. “Have a bad dream?” 

 “Yes. I’m afraid I have a lot of bad dreams these days.” Winter responded, sitting up, his eyes cast down to the blankets. 

“Mind telling me about it? You don’t have to, but you know, sometimes it helps to talk it out.” 

 And there was something so much more intimate in that room, in the silent hum of nighttime. Finally, it seemed, the storm outside had let up, and it was just the two of them. While Winter hadn’t felt comfortable sharing at the dinner table, he felt now things were different. He trusted Snowy, even though they had only just met, and Snowy put on an air around most people, he knew deep down he was more than all that. After all he was the first person Winter ever met who called him by the name he wanted to be called. That said a lot about someone, he thought. 

 So he told him everything. About his childhood, about learning magic in secret, about Joseph, about being lied to, about the night everything went wrong, about being betrayed by his entire town and the one he loved most. By the end of it, he was crying again, and Snowy hugged him tight, and didn’t let go. 

 He then spoke in hushed tones. “Oh, Winter, sugarplum, I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve any of that, you hear me? In fact, your good-for-nothing hometown never deserved someone as wonderful as you.” 

 It felt so nice just to be held. He didn’t realize how much he had missed this. “Well it was my fault for being dumb enough to trust him.” 

“Don’t you believe that for a second. I think we should live in a world where people who love each other can trust one another, don’t you think?” 

 “I do think that, but the world isn’t like that, Snowy.” 

“Maybe we can make it like that, then.” 

 Winter turned his head, a little confused by the implications of that statement. “What do you mean by that?” He asked. 

 “Oh… nothing, I suppose.”

 And perhaps they fell asleep like that, because when Kris peeked in the door to check on them that morning, they were still cradled in each others arms. Kris chuckled to himself. He thought about telling Jessica, but he figured, he’d let all this play out in it’s own time. 

 And for now, they were awfully cute together.

#winter snow #snow miser #winter warlock #the year without a santa claus #rankin bass #santa claus is coming to town #my writing #fanfic #I CANT BELIEVE I DID THIS FOR U GUYS I NEVER WRITE #now that I’ve posted this I think I can go die now

[ittybittyria]

yet another processing post

So sometime during my first year of college someone told me that Christian communities are where you find the friends that become family. Four years later and I think that was one of the biggest pieces of bullshit I bought into.

Don't get me wrong, I've experienced A LOT of growth in the Christian communities I've been a part of and met great people, but I've also experienced an immense amount of judgement, shame, and hurt.

First off, college. LOL I say this all the time and I truly do mean it, college was probably the worst season of my life. On top of family brokenness, struggling with academics, and learning to manage several mental disorders, I had to deal with bullies, racism, sexism, rumors, exceedingly high expectations, never ending judgement companied with unwarned suggestions from several people who knew nothing about me on how to live my life, shaming, and several other things from my Christian fellowship. I think my broken idea of what family is alongside believing that Christian communities are where you find friends that become family made me think that this was okay. It literally took a complete breakdown, losing several friends / mentors, and ending up in the psych ward for me to realize that it was such a toxic environment. But, being in IV did impact me in a lot of positive ways such as personal & spiritual growth, meeting several slightly older folks who became positive role models and influences in my life, new opportunities for me to explore passions, and meeting people outside of UCD that deeply touched my heart. If I could do college over again, I'd still join IV, but I'd just do things differently. I would tell my college self to not lose yourself in the midst of all these leadership trainings / discipleship meetings / staff meet-ups, don't listen to people when they tell you who or what to give your time to because that's up to you, and that God's voice is the most important.

Looking back on college, there's really only one person I met in IV that has become family, and most of our friendship grew outside of IV considering she stopped going LOL There's others that are still friends / acquaintances that I talk to every now and then, see on social media, etc. These positive relationships that really do mean the world to me because they've really help shape me to who I am now. Being led by Victoria, being mentored by Alexi, sharing a friendship with Lily, being encouraged by Robert, etc. are things I treasure. Some of those friendships are still active on social media and it's always a reminder that college wasn't all pain. And then there's a lot of relationships that ended in hurt either through hurtful actions or fading away cause the friendship wasn't worth fostering to them. Those I still treasure for the positive moments and the season they were present in my life. But it's hard to look at those and smile because there's still a lot of hurt I have yet to move past. All in all, my college experience in a Christian community didn't showcase "friends becoming family." Rather it was a mix of meeting great people that challenged me and inspired me, and meeting people that made me lose myself and cause a deep amount of hurt.

As for post-grad, welp. It's been a journey. There's everything with Bayside Davis, which has been negative for the most part. Then there's my small group, which has been a difficult mix of both positive and negative. Positive because I genuinely love my small group. I enjoy our biblical discussions, I feel challenged and encouraged by them, we've shared a lot of laughs, and they're just great people overall. I just feel myself growing with this group and I enjoy the presence of each person. But negative because we aren't really a community LOL All we do is see each other on Thursday's and sometimes at church, and all we ever talk about is from the guided discussion at SG. We've had like four hang outs, three of which I've attended, and they've either been barely anyone or really short or no good chats about getting to know each other. So it's been weird to be in this group and feel growth personally and spiritually, but not in community. It's kinda weird heh.

And today, well, today made cry...a lot. A few days ago I texted my SG being real about how holidays are hard because my family and I go to different churches (it's a lot more than that but I wasn't get too deep into it over text lmao) and I tend to go alone and I was open with them and said that I didn't want to spend Easter morning at church alone and I was hoping to be with community. I asked which service they were going to and if I could join them. Only Elvira responded and she let me know that her and Kevin were serving at the 9am, but that means they don't get to sit during service. No one else responded and I assumed they'd gone back to their hometowns to be with family or just weren't going to Midtown. So I cried last night because I really just didn't want to go church alone. But I woke up this morning feeling good. My window was open, birds were singing, the sun was rising, and I just felt good. I was reminded that I was going to church alone, but I wasn't alone. I went to the 9am service, sat by myself, and loved every second of it. Could it have been better shared with community? Hell yeah, but I was still filled with joy. When I got to my car, someone from SG texted asking where people were sitting and they sent a picture and lookie there, my SG was all together for the second service. I just sat in my car trying not ruin my make-up with tears. I fought them back for a solid 30 minutes.

What got me was that there's a guy in my SG who I've known all through college. He's seen me through a lot and I've opened up to him. He knows the issues with my family and I've talked about how hard holidays are for me. And he couldn't even text me to tell me what service he was going to. I'm like 10x more angry and frustrated with him than the rest of my SG. I literally save him a seat every regular Sunday and his ass walks in late with a donut and coffee every time. Like he couldn't just respond and say 11am. It takes less than a minute to type and send that. And hearing all my family problems and the pain I carry along with it, he just couldn't fucking do it. Y'all I cannot even put into words how unloved I felt today by him.

And even my SG. I was honestly disappointed. I've planned all our hang outs, I've missed TWO small groups (one for a car problem and the other because I wanted to support a friend at her performance). They even said I get the award for best attendance cause I've probably been to the most SG's and YP events. I take time every weekend to pray for their prayer requests and if God brings something up when I pray, I text them. I don't do this to get anything back, like I promise I don't. I genuinely do this because I love my SG, I want the best for them, and I care about them. But I am hurt that no one could just say "11am" when I asked what service. Like...where are the friends that become family?

When I look at the people in my life and I see the friends that have become family, I didn't meet them jn Christian communities. I met them in HS (which was a catholic HS but it doesn't count cause it's totally different lmao) and through those HS friends. They've become family and most of them don't even fucking live in the same city as me. I've seen us travel miles on miles to celebrate birthdays, support each other at performances, be there at graduations, welcome people back at the airport, etc. I've seen us stick up for each other when racism and/or sexual harassment as come up, challenge each other to be better, call each other out on shit we do, etc. I've seen us laugh and cry all in the same hour, be vulnerable and share our stories, listen well and honor the stories we hear, etc. I've seen us go above and beyond to be good friends to each other and these are the friends that have become family.

I don't expect Jessica to fly to celebrate my birthday with me and I don't expect Luis to tell a guy to go away and leave me alone when he's been harassing me and I don't expect Holly to feed me chips outside the club when my drunk ass is hungry. I don't expect these of them and I'd never ask this of them. But a fucking text back when I send you a long message about why I'm thankful were part of my 2017 and how I hope you have a full and joyful 2018 would be nice. Like a thank you. Or you could even just heart the damn message. Or John could just say "I'm going to the 11am service" when I ask our SG which Easter service their going to so I don't go alone. Or even a "thanks for saving a seat" on Sunday's. But nothing. I don't even expect my friends friends to go above and beyond. Like I'm fucking living when they text me saying they also like Enlightened more than they like Halo Top and "OMG did you smell the easter bath bombs at lush? I think you'd like it." Honestly being friends with me really isn't hard. Like my biggest things are initiating every now and then, stick to your word and show up when you say you'll show up, and fucking texting back. Those are the main things and I really don't think they're that complex / difficult. Yet it seems like the only people that can do that in my life are Sabrina, my HS friends, and the friends I met through them. And relating back to what I was originally processing, Sabrina is the only one I met through a Christian community. Goes to show that the whole "Christian communities are where you meet the friends that become family" didn't happen for me heh

It's hard cause I have to remind myself that not everyone wants a friendship with me. But at the same time, don't ask me to plan SG hang outs or show up late to church cause you wanted Starbucks and you know I'll save you a seat or ask me for a ride somewhere when you don't plan on being a friend to me. Don't sit their receiving the benefits of a friendship with me without being a fucking friend to me. Recognize that you're taking advantage of it and either fucking stop or be a friend. Cause it hurts from this side of the situation.

--

LOL wow this post took a turn. I went from talking about buying into the bullshit that Christian communities hold the best friendships you'll have to just friendship in general to getting really fucking mad at people. I think the turn this took is a sign that I need to spend some time in prayer and with God cause there ain't no room in my heart for this bitterness.

Okay I'm tired now and I want to watch Grey's Anatomy to let my brain just stop thinking for a bit and I also need to go pray cause yeah, bitterness ain't cool n shit

[scientifically-strange]

Have you seen defenders yet? Could you do a crossover with it if/when you do? Its like my dream crossover but I cant write at all

It was supposed to be a normal night out with his new friends at the new Chinese place in Harlem not too far from Luke's place. Matt would have loved to enjoy it, but the universe always had a way of screwing him over.

The night was young when it went to shit, and he was hoping to get a few drinks in after this with the others, but no. They had more pressing matters to deal with.

None of them knew it was going to end up ruining their whole weekend.

It all started when the bell above the door chimed, signalling someone new was coming in. Within a few seconds everything sort of ust shifted. He felt Danny on his right tense up, and the way he shoveled more food into his mouth told Matt he was nervous about something. And Matt couldn't blame him.

It had gotten colder. Barely, but enough fr someone like Matt to notice. It seemed to move though, with with newcomer that walked up to the counter. His footsteps were light, almost like he wasn't walking at all, and there was a sort of scent about him. Matt knew no normal nose would have ever been able to detect it, but he knew it wasn't normal, and it definitely had something to do with this guy's unnaturally slow heart beat. It was the smell of death and ozone that made the hairs on Matt's neck stand up. It was barely there, but the smell of decaying flesh was unmistakable. he had smelled it far to often before.

"Take out for Bill Folson," the guy said-and wow, footsteps as light as his should not belong to a voice like his. It was a rich, deep baritone that nearly reverberated. It sounded like the voice a male model would have, or a really hot actor in those dumb action films Fogy made him 'watch' in their college days.

"You guys feel it too, right?" Danny asked, leaning forward. Matt nodded, but Luke and Jessica shook their heads.

"He's doing that weird blind guy thing again," Jessica pointed out, looking over at Matt. His head was tilted, listening intently to the newcomer. But he knew Danny couldn't smell when he did or hear hoe he could, so how did Danny know something was wrong.

"Take-out," Matt whispered. Jessica looked over to see a tall, fake blonde with ice blue eyes and a forced smile as he took the large serving of food and paid before heading out.

"Are we going?" Jessica asked, looking from Matt, to Danny, to Luke, and the blonde halfway out the door. Matt nodded before they could even discuss, and stood up. The others followed, but not before Danny paid for the meal and left a very generous tip.

As it turns out, tailing him wasn't that hard. Jessica was small enough to get into hard to reach places, and Matt was an expert at jumping from building to building. All Luke and Danny had to do was blend in on the bus that Bill Folson had taken, just in case anything happened. But whatever this guy was or could do, it set Danny on edge. Luke wasn't too happy about that.

Luke couldn't help but smile though as the guy's phone started to ring, blaring out the theme from Ghostbusters. So this kid was a dork. Nice to know.

"Hello?" he said. He listened on the other line, and his shoulders seemed to sag a little bit. "Yeah...Yeah, it's no problem, I can come in early tomorrow. Yeah, don't worry about it. Uh-huh." He listened again, nodding before giving him another noise. "Yeah. Okay, see you tomorrow." Bill hung up and sighed, and Luke tried to make friendly conversation.

"Trouble at work?" He asked. Bill looked over at him, an eyebrow raised, but then he just shrugged and nodded.

"Yeah, they overbooked tomorrow, so now the garage is full of cars and they need an extra pair of hands," he explained. So the guy was a mechanic? Okay? "I don't mind though, I mean, it's always nice to have a little more cash in my pocket."

The guy seemed pretty easy going, but there was the way he sat that unnerved Luke. Like he was waiting for someone to come out and scare him. Like he was preparing himself for the worst. His eyes were trained on the doors every few seconds, but other than that they were everywhere else, never staying in one place for longer than a few seconds. A guy his size should never be that jumpy in Luke's opinion. A guy that size shouldn't need a reason to be.

They didn't say anything else, but when they stopped again, Bill got up, his phone ringing in his hands again. Luke saw the way he flinched for a moment before answering. Danny and Luke got off with him, and Luke couldn't help but notice that this was way to lose to his and Claire's apartment.

Bill hadn't seemed to notice they were following him though. He seemed to trained on his conversation. Danny huffed and nudged Luke, nodding towards the buildings where a shadow was ducking.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Bill was saying. He listened to the other person. From the sound of it it was a girl, but it was still to muffled to be able to tell what they were saying. "It's just for a little while-temporary, I promise. Then everything will go back to normal...I know. I'm sorry." he turned and climbed up the stairs to his apartment building, walking in and letting the door shut itself. They waited a little longer before continuing on. Luke's phone vibrated in his pocket, and he took it out.

From: Jessica

Meet at my place. Bring horns, too.

"So what are we dealing with?" Danny asked. He was still unnerved from this guy, which made no sense. He had a sort of aura about him that was a weird sort of energy unlike anything Danny had ever felt. Like death but also the overwhelming need to keep everybody safe. What was he?

"His real name is Danny," Matt said, leaning against the desk on Jessica's left. Luke was on the other side, leaning over but not over her shoulder like Danny.

"Danny? But you said his name was Bill," Danny said. This thing had the same name as him? Weird.

"It's called an alias, temple boy," Jessica stated, every word oozing with sarcasm. "Just gimme a second. And a drink."

Luke was the one that obliged her, pouring her two fingers and nothing more. She downed it quickly before turning back to her laptop, typing furiously.

"What are you doing?" Matt asked, looking at her window.

"Well, he's in hiding according to your super eavesdropping skills, meaning he probably wants the world to think he's either dead or missing. So all we have to do is look up any missing Danny's that are around his age and we should be able to find him sort of soon."

"All Dannys?" Danny asked. "Isn't there like, a filter for physical traits or anything like hair and eyes?"

"Your boy is a fake blonde. I could see the roots, they were dark. It was a rush job," Jessica replied. Jessica briefly glanced at Matt, but decided against a blind joke. She could always just move the furniture later f she really felt like it.

"He smelled weird," Matt offered, looking at the spot jut to the side of her head. Jessica gave him a look.

"How is that gonna help us?" She asked.

"By weird I mean like he's dying," he clarified. "Decaying. And his heart rate was so slow he shouldn't have even been able to be awake."

"He has this weird energy, too," Danny offered. "Like...Death, but good? I've heard of reapers from the elders in K'un-Lun but everybody thought they were just myths."

"You'll believe in dragons but not a reaper?" Luke asked, a small grin making it's way onto his face.

"I'll believe it when I see it. And I've seen a dragon," he defended. That only made Luke's grin wider.

"Uh...I might...Have found him..." Jessica said, half distracted by the screen. On it was a picture of a black-haired man that had the same blue eyes as their "Bill," and the same strong jaw. He was smiling, a big toothy grin like he had no care in the world. It was unlike what Luke had seen on the bus, with his sagging shoulders and tired frame.

"Yeah, that's him. Danny Fenton. Where's he from?" Danny asked.

"Some place called Amity Park, Illinois. Small town, blink-and-you-miss-it type," Jessica answered. She opened up a new window and quickly found herself on the home page of the town.

"You said he smelled dead, right?" Jessica asked. Matt nodded, and she hummed.

"What do you got?" Luke asked.

"Says here Amity Park is constantly being invaded by ghosts. So much so that they actually have some local ghost hunters, the Fentons. But the parents, Jack and Maddie died in a fire just a couple of weeks ago...Sister is a psychiatrist in the upper part of town...old friends with the mayor...Danny though. He went missing. Says he had been visiting his parents when the fire started. They never found the body, but everyone thinks he died...Wait, take a look at this."

She clicked on a couple of images. One being Danny, and the other being a whie haired man with toxic green eyes, both with the same smirk. They called him Inviso-Bill.

"Inviso-Bill and Danny are the same person, he's playing superhero in his hometown."

"Wait, Inviso-Bill? At least now we know where he got his name," Mat offered.

"Danny's two best friends were Tucker Foley and Sam Manson. Folson. Jeez, this kid does not know how to go underground at all," Jessica muttered.

"Yeah, but why is he going underground?" Danny asked.

"Well, he's a ghost superhero, his parents are ghost hunters. And in a town that's being invaded on the daily they can't be the only ones,' Jessica answered.

"How do we know it's not a hoax?" Luke asked. "I mean, come on. Ghosts? Seriously?"

"They're real," Danny said.

"You'll believe in anything at this point, won't you?" Luke asked. Danny gave him a shit-eating grin and shrugged.

"I'm not saying their real," Matt said slowly, "but it would kind of explain...Well, everything."

"So what are we gonna do? Knock on his door and ask for sugar?" Jessica asked, turning away from her computer. Matt shrugged and gave them a small grin.

"That's exactly what we're going to do."

Danny groaned as he climbed the steps to his floor. The only thing worse than a broken elevator was a broken elevator when your body hurt all over from work. The thought of flying up to his room crossed his mind, but he forced it out before he could actually think about it. No, if he was going to lay low for a little while he needed to not use his powers. Plus that's how they were going to find him. They were just waiting for him to do something. He wouldn't give them the satisfaction.

He pulled out his keys in a motion he wished was a little bit smoother and unlocked the door to his apartment, taking in the plain decor and simple, gross couch he got off of Craigslist. He went to the kitchen and leaned on the counter, rubbing the tiredness out of his face.

Had it really only been two weeks? God, he had been so preoccupied with trying to get away he didn't even get to go to his parents' funeral. Or heal properly. His side ached less and less everyday, but it was the kind of burn that would have hospitalized a normal person. Unfortunately, though, he wasn't normal.

He stayed there on the counter for a few moments, wanting to think about Amity but refusing to let himself do so, before being knocked back to reality with his phone. The caller ID said Unknown Number, but he knew that it was Sam. His Sam, that he hasn't seen for two weeks and won't be able to see for much longer. He sat up and answered it, walking over to the window as he did.

"Hey," he said. His voice was tired, but he was always glad to hear from his girl.

"Hey, hun," Sam replied, nothing but loving worry in her voice. Danny smiled at the sound of it. If he was gonna be apart from her for so long, at least he ot to hear her voice. "How was work?"

"Exhausting. I swear to Clockwork, if I have to change one more oil I'm gonna scream."

"How's the view, then?" She was trying to cheer him p, he knew, bu he just couldn't. He missed Amity and his friends, and he would do anything to be back there. But with those people on his tail there was no way he was going to. He couldn't put Sam or anybody else in danger.

"Real pretty at night. Like stars, but...Pretty. And everything is so tall, way taller than back there. All I want to do is..." He lost his train of thought when a movement caught his eye. It was a reflection in the mirror, some guy in a red suit trying to sneak up on him.

"To see everything from p high, I know. Hey, I have o jump off. I love you, Danny."

"I love you to, Sam."

he had barely hung up when he whirled around and swung at the mysterious figure. The guy dodged it, reaching for a stick at his hip as he id so.

"Who are you?" Danny asked. He was thankful his mom had taught him martial arts. Otherwise he'd be screwed against a guy like this without his powers. His opponent didn't answer, but he didn't keep on throwing punches either. He heard shuffling t the side and glanced over to see a tall bald man standing next to a smaller, curly haired kid Danny had seen on the news. Wasn't he that Rand guy that came back from the dead? What was he doing here with this guy? What were any of them doing here.

"Hey," he said. "What are you guys doing here? Who even are you?"

"Well," a woman this time spoke. He turned to his living room to see a dark haired lady with a scarf and a look in her eyes that told everybody not to fuck with her. Danny didn't want to be on the receiving end of that. "We're here to find out what you are, what you've done, and what you can do," she stated. Then she smirked and added, "Danny."

A chill ran down Danny's spine. So they knew? But how? He had done nothing but cover his tracks. Hell, he even dyed his hair! And...Well, his name could have used a little more thought, but it sounded nothing like Danny Fenton!

"Who are you?" He asked again.

The four seemed to consider for a moment, but that was long enough for Danny to bolt. He turned right back around and slammed his weight through the window and fell onto the fire escape before climbing. He had some nasty cuts from the glass, and his shoulder was starting to sport a horrible bruise from shoving his large frame through a tiny window. His side wasn't helping him at all, aching almost as much as when he had first got it. He was sure it was bleeding now, but he couldn't stop.

He wasn't the best climber, but he was fast, and really that's what mattered in the end. If he got to the roof first he would practically be home free. He sprinted away, pumping his arms harder and harder as he jumped from one building to the next, the pain in his sie growing every time he landed. He needed to make himself unknown soon, or else he was as good as fully dead.

he was almost surprised that the guy in he red suit was almost able to keep up with him, and made the mistake f looking back. He tripped over his own feet and landed hard, rolling over a couple times before finally coming to a stop. His wound was bleeding badly now, and there was no stopping it. Not when he felt like he was going to pass out. But if they knew who he was, that mean they probably knew what he was, and he couldn't stop. He started getting back up again, but paused when the guy's feet came into his vision.

"You're hurt," he said.

"Who are you?" Danny spat. "What do you want?" he grit his teeth, clutching his side with one hand as a mixture of red and green oozed out.

"Daredevil. And you're-"

"-Don't!" Danny cut him off, looking around briefly ou of paranoia. "Don't say. They might be listening."

"Who?" Daredevil asked.

"I'll tell you, just not-ngh-not here."

"Come on, we have a safe place we can crash." Daredevil held out his hand, and Danny took it. He slowly climbed to his feet, but that was a big mistake. The second he did, his knees buckled, and his vision became blurry. Daredevil barely had time to catch him before he passed out.

Danny woke up to the sound of voices. They were muffled, but he could recognize one of them as that woman from the night before. What was she saying...

Danny was knocked out of his thoughts when he felt a hand on his side where the burn was, and without thinking he sprung up, grabbing the small wrist in his hand tightly. It belonged to a dark skinned woman with kind eyes and dark hair. She seemed surprised, but only because his reaction was so sudden. She was wearing a pair of blue gloves, and in the hand he had grabbed was a cloth.

"Where am I?" he asked, looking around. He didn't let go of her.

"You're somewhere safe. My friend brought you here, said you needed medical attention. This burn looks really bad. Why haven't you gotten it treated?"

"Who are you?" Danny asked, not answering her question. He seemed to be asking that a lot lately.

"Get rid of the death grip on my wrist and I'll tell you," she said, raising an eyebrow. A beat passed between them before he forced his fingers to let go.

"You know, now that the burn is being properly treated you're healing pretty fast. Faster than I've ever seen. And the cuts you got the other night from the window? Those are already gone."

"Wait-other night? How long have I been out?" Danny asked.

"Two days. You needed it to. You were exhausted, dehydrated, and bleeding out. Even with super healing you need to take a break. Now come on, lie on your side so I can change the bandages."

"Yeah...Yeah. Okay." Danny obliged, turning over and trying not to freak out about the situation. He had been kidnapped by mystery people and was being tended to, but he had his shirt off, meaning she was seeing all of his scars from ghost hunting.

"Jesus, you're freezing," she muttered as she took continued to wipe the wound down. Danny flinched, but he managed to stay still. enough for her to finish. It only took a few short minutes, but that was long enough for Danny to get so tense it hurt. She paced a clean bandage over it and stood up.

"Be careful, okay? You're not all bulletproof." Then she stood and headed towards the door. Just before she opened it, she turned to him and smiled. "My name is Claire, by the way."

Danny nodded, and as she left he couldn't help but fall back asleep.

---------------------

So there’s probably gonna be a sequel? Idk but I love this crossover, it was so much fun to write.

[dove-haunted]

I dreamt the end in his hometown, Daytona. The next time I saw him, it was over. My dream come true.

I hadn't seen him for a week, not since we watched Jessica Lange drink her ghostly champagne with Susan Sarandon in Feud. Hadn't talked to him, not since he told me to stop asking his friends such invasive questions and I cried in his car. Hadn't touched him, not since the jacuzzi and his parents' bed. My lease had ended. The night it happened was my last night in St. Augustine. I wanted him there with me, to celebrate. I greeted him at his car, pulled up alongside my old apartment. I told him how happy I was to see him again and held him close, but he was deeply inside himself, beyond touch. He had a sunburn from a boating trip he took earlier in the day. I thought he was just dehydrated—simply sun-poisoned. But it went deeper than the skin. I surprised him with my mattress: it needed moving. A simple request for a boyfriend; not so much for an ex. But we put it off until the next day. Now was the time for drinking. We went to Odd Birds and ordered two Tom Collins, his favorite drink. Then we sat outside on two very uncomfortable seats sat on either side of the table. At the table beside us was a group of very loud fratboys, obnoxious. Across from us, a lonely looking girl in black, staring intently in our direction. Drunk In Love by Beyonce played on the speakers. I kept trying to inch my chair closer to him, but, tall and heavy as it was, it just wouldn't budge. So I dealt with the distance. Always harder for me than him, because, if I'm touching him, at least I can pretend he's touching me back, and if I'm not—well, why isn't he reaching out for me? The week after Daytona, I'd become more excited about the future. I was changing everything for him, rearranging my entire life to be with him. Not just because of him, but mostly. For a little while, I was mad at him about this, upset that I'd made all these compromises, all these sacrifices, and he'd made none. But in this moment, everything felt right again. I was even going to apologize for pressuring him to let me move in with him. I talked about all of this then and when I was done, he grew silent. I asked him what he was thinking about. That's when it happened. He said he didn't want to do it then, but I pushed him. How could I not? I remember not feeling anything then, not even sadness. When he said he didn't want to do it, I looked him right in the eye and said, "You already did." I handled it so well I think because I prepared myself for it almost since the beginning. Is that insecurity or intuition? I don't know. But even now I feel so little, I wonder if I knew at all. Maybe I'm still in shock. Though tonight is pretty rough. The reasons: we aren't compatible, he isn't in love with me. The first I could deal with. The second, not so much, though I felt it too. But I'll come back to that. I barely let him speak from this point on. Everything he said was as irritating as nettles. I'd cut him off, literally tell him to shut up, and make him wait while I collected my thoughts. He was an asshole to me, and I told him this. He was unkind to me. He knows this. But even his admittance of guilt was annoying. I wanted to be cruel to him, to tell him every mean thing I ever thought about him. But I couldn't. I cared about him too much, still do. Even now I can't bring myself to write down what I don't like about him. He could be reading this, just like he read what I wrote about Valentine's Day. Besides, I like even the things I don't like about him. But it was more than that too. I was speechless because I was powerless. If he truly couldn't conceive of ever being able to fall in love with me, then what could I do to change his mind? Nothing. And so I sat there, silently, while Drunk In Love played for the third time that night. When he went to the bathroom, I made eye contact with the girl in black. I know she knew what was happening. I could feel her trying to comfort me with her gaze, but she was a nonentity to me then. I couldn't care less about her or the fratboys or the bartender who'd forgotten to ask for my card. When he came back, I wanted to leave. I refused to pay for the drinks and we bounced on the bill. We sat in the car for awhile. I don't remember what we said. If the circumstances had been different, I think I still would have acted the same. Before this, we'd planned on me staying the week with him while I finished my two weeks at work. I still needed him for this, but more than that: I was still looking forward to it. I still wanted to be with him. But first, I needed help moving my things, and so we spent the next hour or so packing his car with my stuff. This was excrutiating. When I'd said goodbye to my neighbor earlier, I'd been happy. Now, coming back, saying hello felt like regurgitating the nails I'd been swallowing all night. I kept talking, kept making jokes. It was bittersweet how much fun we were still capable of having together. When he left my room for a moment, I saw the card he made me for Valentine's Day lying on the floor, the jawbreaker he gave me lying next to it. I burst into tears. I could still feel them clinging to my lashes when he came back. Still, I laughed, still I tried to make him feel more comfortable. Like always, I was thinking of him. I don't know if he knows how lucky he was, what he was throwing away even as it was happening. Forty-six minutes in the car with him as we drove to Jacksonville. He picked up cigarettes before he left. Along the way, I made a joke about the gift I'd given him for Valentine's Day: a decorative jar with two candies from our first date submerged in resin. A tag reading "Seth and Adam 2016—" was tied around its neck. I said, "Now we can finish it. Now we can write 2017 at the end." His laugh was empty. The only time he cried was when I looked over at him and thanked him for the last few months, for the time he spent with me. He grabbed my arm and made a noise like a heart breaking. I felt better after this. He said something about possibly regretting his decision, about maybe even regretting it even as he was making it. I hesitated here. I wasn't sure why I was saying what I was about to say. I think I actually felt fine. I think I was clear-headed. I told him I understood where he was coming from, that I thought we both felt the same way. Before, we'd both told each other we loved each other, with him adding "but I don't know if I'm in love with you." At the time, I didn't think that was necessary. I didn't know if I was in love with him either. Still don't. That requires time. But I knew I at least loved him as a friend, liked him more than that, and I think that's enough for five months. Even sitting in the car after breaking up I felt this. That's why it was so easy for us to still be together. Looking back, it was the easiest break up in the world. And that's why I said what I said: "If you ever change your mind, tell me." I don't know how I'd respond, if I'd take him back, but I was still open to the idea. I wanted him to know that, just in case. The possibility of real love is still too important for me to lose, even if it means losing a little bit of my dignity. The rest of the night was so good. It was like nothing had happened. His roommate and our friend didn't know, didn't even guess. How could she? We were still laughing and having fun. She wouldn't know until two days later, when it all hit me again and I couldn't hide it anymore. I'll write more about that later. The hardest part was sleeping in the same bed as him, our bodies on opposite sides. It was always easier for him to sleep apart from me, untouching. I wonder if it was the same for him that night. Me? I was miserable out on the edge. It's bizarre being in the same circumstance as so many times before, knowing that once you could turn around and wrap him up in your arms, but now you can't. Now, everything is changed and all you have is yourself to curl into, like a fetus without a womb. There's more to this. A whole week of me staying with him. I'll write it down later, when I’m less tired. Remember, this is imperfect and unsatisfactory. There's so much more to the story, but I'm tired and can't care about this anymore. Too much time has passed. I am two steps on the water.

#the break up #part 1 #personal

[sarahburness]

50 People Share What They’re Grateful to Do Every Day

At night, when you think about how you spent your day, how often do you focus on all the things you had to do?

I worked. I ran errands. I went to the gym. I made dinner.

And when you tell someone about this kind of day, how often do you do it with a less-than-enthused tone?

I suspect this is the norm for many of us, at least during the workweek.

Commitments, to work and family, can engulf our lives and seem like chores, not choices and chances.

I distinctly remember one day, years ago, when my day felt particularly packed, stopping to remind myself that I had chosen the schedule I was keeping.

I had chosen to get up early to write, to accept the job that supported me, to go to yoga in the evening, and to do laundry and other household tasks after that.

And I was fortunate to have had these choices to make.

These weren’t all things I had to do; these were things I got to do.

I got to devote time to my passion in the hours before my paid work, creating possibilities for my future.

I got to work a job that provided both pay and benefits, enabling me to take care of my needs, even if it wasn’t my dream career.

I got to stretch my healthy body and create mental stillness.

And I got to live in a comfortable apartment, filled with furniture and clothes I got to buy with money I got to earn.

And in between all these things I had consented to do were lots of other beautiful little things I got to do.

I got to wake up to sunlight coming through my window. I got to walk by interesting people, trees, and buildings on my way to work. I got to eat delicious food from various restaurants at lunch. And I got to use my hands when typing on my computer—hands I could have been born without, or could have lost to some type of injury or tragedy, but hadn’t.

I get to do a lot of things worth appreciating every day. We all do.

We all get to do things that challenge us, fulfill us, excite us, and energize us. We get to live, love, laugh, and explore in far too many ways too count.

Since I’ve long been inspired by this idea of focusing on what we get to do, I decided to include this as one of the prompts in my newly released gratitude journal.

I shared this prompt on Facebook this past Sunday to see how other people would respond. Over 1,500 people chimed in, creating a monumental list of blessings, many of which we all share but could easily take for granted.

Since I was inspired and touched by the list, I decided to share a selection of those responses here.

I Appreciate That Every Day I Get To…

Health

1. Shelley White: Breathe. I received donor lungs nine years ago after my own lungs failed. I have Cystic Fibrosis. Just being able to wake every day knowing I can spend another day with my family is what makes me grateful to be alive. I appreciate life.

2. Kristi VanTassel McHugh: Wake up. I had open-heart surgery nearly two years ago, to replace a faulty aortic valve and repair an aortic aneurysm. When I was first diagnosed, I was told, “If it’s not fixed soon (the aneurysm) it will burst and you will die.” That was two days before Christmas, and I waited just over six months for my surgery. I am thankful to still be here, every day.

3. GusandMaggie Nosce: Be alive. I was born a congenital heart patient (blue baby) and was advised I would need a heart transplant by the time I was four years old. By the grace of God, I have never needed one, even though the open-heart surgery I received when I was days old is no longer in practice and is no longer advised to perform.

4.Manal Khatib: I appreciate that I can walk after a serious car accident eight months ago. Every day I had to relearn how to walk. This journey has made me appreciate my body and treat it with kindness.

5. Laina Amarantinis: Walk and stand. After three spine surgeries I am finally able to walk and stand more and more as the healing progresses. I am very thankful.

6. Mary Beth Hudson: Spend time with my family. I beat my battle with cancer; others in my family were not so lucky.

7. Linda Otto: Move my body. I can walk, run, lift, bend, etc., all with ease. This is not possible for many people. It can be taken away in an instant or gradually as we age. Your health, eyesight, hearing are never appreciated enough.

Friends and Family

 8. Anna Hunt: Spend time with my daughter. Soon she will be off to college and I won’t have her close. Hearing her laughter, knowing she’s in the next room, fills my heart with warmth. I appreciate that every day I get to see her.

9. Amy Albinger: Be with my family. Be with my parents, my husband, my sister, and niece. They are the reason I live today. They are my reason to get through each struggle. They are my definition of love.

10. Riddhi Solanki: I appreciate that I get calls from my parents and friends, as my current job isn’t in my hometown. They call me and talk to me so I don’t feel more alone.

11. Niquita LeValdo: I wake up to my child. He was born with a heart condition and needed surgery at two months old. The thought that he may not have been alive today gives me a new perspective and helps me appreciate every moment. Love your children, praise them, cherish them.

12. Lillivette Colón:‪ Keep my baby in my tummy one more day. Every day is victory.

‪13. Tezra Blake:‪ I appreciate every day I get to see and hear both my sons growing into awesome men, and that they aren’t ashamed to say I love you mom and check on me and ask how I am doing. Despite their age they still want my opinion on things.

‪14. Laurel Hausafus:‪ Have the memories of my sweetheart and husband in Heaven .

15. Cheryle Midgett: Spend another day with my ninety-four-year-old mom.

16. Anika Bruce:‪ Every day I get to hug my family. I love hugs, they’re life changing.

17. Nicole Werner-Sayre:‪ Stay at home to raise the tiny little human I created and help her grow up into a person I’ll be proud to add to the world.

18. Laurie Clemons: Give a hug and say I love you. We all need to hear it more.

19. Dawn Creason: I get to read and cuddle with the most precious little girl that I never thought I would have. I get to hear her giggle and I get to play with her.

20. Fiona James: Wake up happy and healthy with my wonderful family. Too many people don’t have that luxury.

Needs and Comforts

21. Elizabeth Sherriff: Have a roof over my head, fresh water, food, and a family around me.

22. Kathy Kellermann: Have a warm shower and a bed to climb into (especially in the middle of winter).

‪23. Jessica Grandelli‪: Eat food that nourishes and sustains my life. It is a privilege to live in a place with bountiful food.

24. Jacinta Harrington: Enjoy a cup of coffee while reading the newspaper.

25. Caroline Driver: Eat whatever I want and drink water straight out of the tap.

26. Marsha Frakes Waggoner: Walk outdoors in the grass with my dog and see trees.

27. Heather Demick: Drink in the world through my eyes.

28. Yvonne Hernandez: Have a place I call home.

29. Alice Louise Pocock: Listen with my ears, see with my eyes, and love with all my heart.

‪30. Xuandai Hoang‪: Sit in front of my candle and relax.

31. Enchari Rivadeneira: Dishes. It means I have food, a kitchen, a family to share with, and I did it. I made through another day, whatever happened. It’s a beautiful thing, dishes.

32. Chloe Cunningham Sarno: Finish all the housework all in the same day. Ah, clean house!!

33. Tammy Pillsbury: Lay my head down knowing I have a roof over my head, food to eat, a job that rewards me, a husband that loves me, friends and family whom I love, nature outside my door.

34. Michael Bell: Read. There is no aspect of life that I have derived more benefit and pleasure from, and I couldn’t imagine my life without it.

35. Danielle Yingling-Lowrey: Be with my babies, take care of my flowers, cook, drink coffee, be a friend, be a neighbor, be mama, be a daughter, be a wife, drive my car, take care of my house, giggle, laugh, read, smile at others…. so many things!

36. Nicola Wood: Wake up and just be me and appreciate how blessed I truly am!

37. Steve Kenney: Not feel the pain of starving, the pain of extreme thirst. Having a roof over my head, and AC. Having a few people who really care about me for me, not what I can do or give them. Not suffering from bad health. That’s it. Everything else is inconsequential.

Possibilities

38. Gena Pegg: I appreciate that every day I get another chance to do the right thing.

39. Bani San: I appreciate that every day I get to wake up in freedom and pursue whatever life I dream of.

40. Jayne Duncan Stites: I appreciate that every day I get to begin again anew!

41. Jim Zei: Have another opportunity to make things right—whatever right is.

42.Lechenda Crichton: Have one more chance to be better than I was yesterday.

43. Sherelle Myers: Use my body and working limbs for whatever I choose!

44. Angela Charlwood-Derbyshire:‪ Practice making better choices.

45. Linda May Knowles: To learn from the mistakes I made the day before.

46. Wizz Tomo: I appreciate that every day I get to learn new things.

47. Ashley Glenn: To be alive and experience whatever the new day presents.

48. Amy Brock: Breathe and do normal activities of daily living. There was a time that I couldn’t do such a great job of either.

‪49. Herb Daum‪: I appreciate that every day I get to make the world a kinder place.

50. Melissa Milligan: Be here. Not everyone made it through the night. Be grateful you’re still here.

I appreciate that every day I get to…

How would you finish this sentence?

*This post was originally published in 2017. I decided to republish it again today for those who missed it because it’s fitting for the season!

About Lori Deschene

Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha and Recreate Your Life Story, an online course that helps you let go of the past and live a life you love. Her latest book, Tiny Buddha's Worry Journal, which includes 15 coloring pages, is now available. For daily wisdom, follow Tiny Buddha on Twitter, Facebook & Instagram.

Web | Twitter | Facebook | Google+ | More Posts

Get in the conversation! Click here to leave a comment on the site.

The post 50 People Share What They’re Grateful to Do Every Day appeared first on Tiny Buddha.

from Tiny Buddha https://tinybuddha.com/blog/50-people-share-theyre-grateful-every-day/

[betwixt-these-pages]

Friend (With Benefits) Zone by Laura Brown on Tour June 26 – July 13, 2017

  Book Details

Genre: New Adult, Contemporary Romance

Published by: Avon Impulse

Publication Date: June 27th 2017

Number of Pages: 384

ISBN-13: 9780062495594 (ASIN: B01EFM8NC0)

Purchase Links: Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Goodreads

Synopsis:

I’m ridiculously attracted to my best friend.

Today is a bad day. The worst actually. After dealing with the constant manhandling that comes with being a cocktail waitress at a dive bar and surviving a date from hell, I see an eviction notice slapped on the door of my sketchy basement apartment. Great.

When my best friend Devon shows up at my door and uses his stubborn charm (emphasis on stubborn) to get me to move in with him, I give in. We’ve had about a million sleepovers since we met in the kindergarten Deaf program, but this time it’s different because I can’t stop thinking about his hard body covering mine, every single night.

I know Devon would do anything for me, but I’m afraid what I want to happen will ruin our friendship forever. And the more time we spend together in close quarters, the harder it’ll be to resist the spark of attraction I’ve always felt. But maybe it’s possible to have the best of both worlds: keep the one relationship I can’t live without and indulge in an attraction I can’t deny.

I guess the only thing we can do is try…

Read an excerpt:

I was still staring at my notebook when a light flashed by my tiny window. Outside someone stood with a flashlight, shining it into my apartment. I didn’t need to adjust to the light to know who that someone was with the one, two, three blinking pattern.

It took five steps to stomp over to the door. Dev came in once I wedged it open. He pushed the door closed.

“You can’t have your clothes back,” I signed, even as I was grateful to see him. When Dev was around, even this place sorta felt like a home.

“I don’t want my clothes back. Not now, at least. I wanted to make sure you were OK.”

I held out my hands, showing that I was fine. Even if I did scan my coffee table and breathe in relief that the eviction letter was face down in a crumpled mess.

He studied me, searching for all my little tics that spelled I was in trouble, tics only he knew. I blanked my face; otherwise he would latch onto there being a problem. A big one. Dev shoved a hand through his hair, those wavy locks rioting into one massive sexy-as-hell bedhead. I missed the days when he was a spindly little thing, before he grew into this hunk I could never unfriendzone. He meant too much to rock the boat, and I didn’t dare risk losing him. He scratched at a day’s worth of scruff, the black stubble contrasting with his pale skin. Then he kicked off his shoes, tossed his coat on the back of a chair, and plopped down on my bed in a way that had to have a spring or two digging into his back.

He didn’t budge.

I wanted to laugh. Forget me time—neither one of us had given the other the right to be alone since we first met. Still, I couldn’t let go of our usual bickering match. “Go home.”

He folded his hands behind his head, not moving. I crossed my arms. A few seconds later he sat up, grabbed my laptop off the floor, and flipped it open. “We’ll watch a movie.”

“My laptop can’t handle Netflix. You know that.”

He closed the laptop. “Right. Forgot.” He unlocked his phone and placed it on the bed.

“Tiny viewing tonight?”

“You refused to come to my place.” Underlining meaning: we could have watched on a large flat-screen TV.

Since there was no budging him now that he had settled in, I climbed onto the bed with him. He picked up the phone so we could watch, and I settled my head on his chest.

I didn’t pay much attention to the action flick he put on. Most days I loved the intensity of those movies. Tonight, those explosions felt too close for comfort. Instead I made a mental list of my options. Had to before Dev found out. He’d want me to stay with him. And being cuddled up with him, I had to admit, had potential. More so when I placed my hand on his firm stomach and took in a deep breath of the ocean scent of his soap. Problem was, I needed to be on my own two feet. The last person to take care of me—my mother—had failed. I couldn’t trust anyone else.

Not even Dev.

***

Excerpt from Friend (With Benefits) Zone by Laura Brown. Copyright © 2017 by Laura Brown. Reproduced with permission from HarperCollins. All rights reserved.

  Author Bio:

Laura Brown lives in Massachusetts with her quirky abnormal family. Her husband’s put up with her since high school, her young son keeps her on her toes, and her three cats think they deserve more scratches. Hearing loss is a big part of who she is, from her own Hard of Hearing ears, to the characters she creates.

Visit Laura on her Website, Twitter, Facebook, & Goodreads pages!

  Visit these Tour Hosts for More on Friend (With Benefits) Zone by Laura Brown:

Giveaway:

This is a rafflecopter giveaway hosted by Partners in Crime Virtual Book Tours for Laura Brown and Harper Collins. There will be 3 winners of one (1) eBook copy of Signs of Attraction by Laura Brown. The giveaway begins on June 24 and runs through July 14 2017.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Quick Reasons: believable, realistic, awesome characters; SO STEAMY I CAN’T EVEN!; mature subjects handled with sensitivity and poise; I am much more open-eyed on hearing impairments/deaf culture after this read; just enough drama and angst to keep my penguin heart cold

#gallery-0-6 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-6 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 25%; } #gallery-0-6 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-6 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

hot and steamy

entertaining

devoured it

fishing for more

Huge thanks to Laura Brown, Avon Impulse, Partners in Crime Book Tours, and Edelweiss for sending me a free egalley of this title in exchange for an honest review! This in no way altered my read of or opinions on this book.

  So once again, I find myself on the other side of a book I never even took the time to read a blurb for–and feeling SO very glad that I went into this read blind. I was honestly surprised with what I discovered between these covers–and what a steamy, sexy cover it is. I mean, just LOOK at him, with his brooding face and black leather jacket and… GAAAAAH. Someone, quick, find me my partner in crime and bestest panda buddy Annelise–those abs are just BEGGING her to lick them!

This romance was steamy and heart-wrenching in turn. I have always been a fan of “friends” to “lovers,” and this story BEAUTIFULLY encapsulates that journey in a dramatic, angsty, fear-for-the-outcome way that kept me enthralled and entertained. The love between Jas and Dev was believable and endearing, and I loved learning about them from not only THEIR POV…but from the other’s as well. The fact that these characters are also diverse and well-rounded only made me fall even more in love with them. Honestly, I’m going to be picking up more of Laura Brown in the very near future–I had such a great time rooting for (and shouting at) this couple. Their dynamics and antics are just… AGGGGGGH, I just want to hug them both!

  This was a super fun, light-hearted (though still painful at times!), and diverse read–and I adored every minute of it! The characters are well-rounded, the romance is believable, and the angst only helped to cement me more fully into their journey. I definitely recommend this to lovers of contemporary romance, complex growth stories, and the flight from “friends” to “lovers.” Sparks are flying, Penguins; take a seat and watch the show!

    Visit Providence Book Promotions for more great books!

Blog Tour, Excerpt, Giveaway, and Review: Friend (with Benefits) Zone Friend (With Benefits) Zone by Laura Brown on Tour June 26 - July 13, 2017 Book Details…

#all about books #all things books #blog tours #book blitz #book bloggers #book blogs #book giveaways #book reviewers #book tours #bookish #bookish bloggers #bookish blogs #bookish excerpts #bookish fun #bookish giveaways #bookish posts #bookish reviewers #bookish reviews #bookish things #books #contemporary #diverse characters #diverse reads #new adult #penguin bloggers #penguin blogs #penguin fun #penguin news #penguin posts #penguin reviewers

[writingsubmissions]

UFC Fight Night 108 Preview

WHAT'S HAPPENING: *Well, last weekend's Fox card from Kansas City pretty much lived up to all that hype on paper as one of the best cards of the year, and the main event title fight was pretty much Demetrious Johnson summed up in a nutshell - complete dominance by likely the best fighter in the world, accompanied by the lowest ratings of any Fox card to date. Anyway, Johnson's obviously been one of the best of the world for years running with the way he's run roughshod over a really solid division, but few of his performances have put his greatness so clearly on display; Johnson just outclassed Wilson Reis on the feet, darting in with strikes at will while never being there to get hit, before taking things to the ground and running through a BJJ black belt before cinching on a third-round armbar for the tap. Johnson's tied Anderson Silva's record for consecutive title defenses with this win, and it sounds like Mighty Mouse is ready to go for number eleven - it'll be interesting to see if, well, UFC can find anyone who'll give him a challenge. *And the rest of the main card wound up shaking up the contender picture for a few different divisions. Coming off a frustrating loss to Karolina Kowalkiewicz, Rose Namajunas pretty much put together the best performance of her career in pretty much handling Michelle Waterson, and apparently earned herself a title shot in the process. Admittedly, Waterson helped her out in the first round by trying that dumb head-and-arm throw that so many strawweights seem to love, resulting in Namajunas working over Waterson for the balance of the first round, but the second round saw Namajunas just piece up Waterson standing before going for the fight-ending submission. I'd like to see Namajunas string together a few more performances like this before getting that title shot, but given that Joanna Jedrzejczyk is starting to clear out the division, assuming a Jessica Andrade title win doesn't open things up, Thug Rose is the obvious next contender. The big mover and shaker, though, was Robert Whittaker getting a shockingly one-sided win over longtime contender Jacare Souza, establishing himself as one of the top contenders for middleweight champ Michael Bisping. Whittaker's ability to keep things standing was the big question, but he mostly shucked off Souza when he tried to grapple and then just destroyed the Brazilian on the feet, eventually earning a second-round stoppage. Amazingly, UFC finally has a young Australian star that can fight for the title down under, and while this was a damaging loss for Souza as he seems to be exiting his athletic prime, things could have been worse, as Jacare signed a new eight-fight contract with UFC right before this fight took place. And the main card opener saw Brazilian prospect Renato Moicano suddenly establish himself as a concern at featherweight with a decision win over Jeremy Stephens - it wasn't a dominant win, but Moicano was pretty much a step ahead the entire fight, and while it looked like Moicano's career was stalling a bit thanks to injuries, this was a big win that more than made up for lost time and shot Moicano up the ladder. *There was a bunch of fun stuff on the undercard, led by Tim Elliott's decision win over Louis Smolka, which led off the Fox portion of the prelims. These two guys pretty much just went non-stop for fifteen minutes, scrambling back and forth with submissions, as a crowd that was awesome pretty much all night cheered them on. Elliott got the big hometown win, and despite three straight losses, I hope UFC hangs on to Smolka, who continues to show here that he's an exciting, if flawed, talent. French uber-prospect Tom Duquesnoy made his debut and mostly lived up to the hype - American wrestler Patrick Williams was surprisingly effective early, not so much in damaging Duquesnoy as much as neutralizing him, but soon exhausted himself as much as you'll ever see a lighter-weight fighter gas out, at which point it was off to the races, as Duquesnoy put him away with some of his trademark vicious elbows. This wasn't the type of win that announced Duquesnoy is ready to be in the bantamweight top ten tomorrow, but his ceiling is still ridiculous, and UFC should bring him along slowly. Also at bantamweight, Aljamain Sterling got a huge win over Augusto Mendes in a hell of a fight - Sterling had fixed some of the problems with his janky striking game, but even that almost wasn't enough, as Mendes, a BJJ stud, has proven to be a quick study, continuing to show his own impressive striking game to complement that lethal submission game. Veteran Anthony Smith shockingly got a third-round comeback knockout over top prospect Andrew Sanchez - Sanchez showed to have some cardio problems here as he tried to coast to a victory, but between this and his last win over Elvis Mutapcic, Smith has basically gotten rid of his rep as a guy who wilts once he's losing, and suddenly might be making a run towards the top fifteen. Kansas City's Zak Cummings got an impressive hometown win, running through Nathan Coy, even if it was marred a bit by Mike England, a terrible referee who's been a regular on Invicta cards in Missouri, basically waiting for Coy to be unconscious for a few seconds before calling the fight off via submission. And in a fun opener of the card, Brazilian bantamweight Ketlen Vieira looked super impressive in a clear win over Ashlee Evans-Smith - Evans-Smith looked solid, but Vieira improved greatly from her UFC debut, using her size and range to dictate the terms of the fight. And there was some not-so-fun stuff - Rashid Magomedov coasted to a win over Bobby Green that never really particularly went anywhere, and the same was true of light heavyweight prospect Devin Clark's win over Jake Collier. Plus Roy Nelson appears to be completely done, as Alexander Volkov rather easily got the nod over him - Nelson's way too foot-slow at this point to do much of anything standing, and even his grappling game is starting to fail him, as he's pretty much just forced to lay on top of opponents and do nothing if he wants to maintain control. I wouldn't be surprised if UFC cut Nelson at this point, but I don't think they'll let a marketable guy go to Bellator - I just don't know what you do with him for his next fight, though. *So...UFC 214 in Anaheim is shaping up maybe kinda sorta? We have an idea of UFC wants to do there with a double main event, but getting there may be a problem. It appears set that Daniel Cormier will be defending his light heavyweight title on that show, but apparently the ball is in Jon Jones's court - if Jones wants an immediate return against Cormier, it's his, but if he wants a tune-up fight first, it'll be Cormier against Jimi Manuwa. I assume Jones will be taking that fight - I don't see him having any fear of facing Cormier, and why risk losing a big money fight if Manuwa manages to win the title. They also apparently want a women's featherweight title fight between the only two women seemingly left in the division, with Germaine de Randamie defending against Cris Cyborg, but that's apparently turned into way more of a mess. UFC's apparently been trying to put the fight together, and Cyborg is basically acting on social media like the fight is happening, but de Randamie's a complete question mark - after beating Holly Holm for the title, she talked about needing surgery on her hand, and at last word, she apparently hasn't even seen a doctor yet. Plus there's some strangeness going on with Cyborg's contract - apparently she has two fights left on her deal, but regardless of anything else, her contract will apparently expire come this October, and there's no word on any sort of extension. So, one wonders at what point UFC decides that Cyborg, or the featherweight division in general, just isn't worth the trouble. *World Series of Fighting is apparently no more at the end of 2017, as the promotion just announced they'll become - or be absorbed by? - the new Professional Fighters League. Apparently the new promotional model will be similar to the old IFL, which died a quick death as a bit of a punchline, pitting fighters in some sort of round robin tournament that will eventually end in a playoff format. Uh...interesting, I guess. No word yet on what'll happen to the promotion's champions or talent currently under contract, so, this'll be fun to watch as it unfolds. *Well, I don't know if UFC's going back to South Korea anytime soon, as Korean police are investigating allegations of match fixing stemming to their debut in Seoul back in November of 2015. I mentioned it at the time, but this all goes back to the fishy betting lines for an undercard bout between Tae Hyun Bang and Leo Kuntz. Bang was a slight betting favorite for most of the time lines were open, but suddenly jumped up to a gigantic underdog in the days leading up to the fight, as what apparently eventually wound up being $2 million worth of money was bet on Kuntz to win. So, immediately everyone realized something was up, with some books taking the line down, but when the fight came around, things didn't seem all that strange. Bang seemed to be walking with a slight limp, suggesting maybe had some inside info about an injury, but he wasn't fighting like a man who had been told to lose, and wound up taking the narrow decision win. Well, the story's apparently started to come out. The Korean mob did in fact pay Bang to lose, paying him the equivalent of $100,000 (half of which he turned around and bet against himself), but when UFC officials repeatedly asked Bang what he knew about all the weird gambling movement on his feet, Bang denied having any knowledge of what was going on. And when push came to shove, Bang got cold feet, and decided to fight for the win, which he wound up getting. So, as you'd imagine, Bang has been getting death threats ever since, at which point he contacted the authorities. So...hoo boy. Hope this all goes well for him. ------ BOOKINGS: *Not a ton has been announced in the last week, with the one big fight being UFC finally signing World Series of Fighting bantamweight champion Marlon Moraes. WSOF helped make a name for a few guys, and Moraes might have been their biggest breakout star, a tiny ball of violence that pretty much ran through all comers. WSOF kind of existed as sort of a scheme for manager/matchmaker/possible terror suspect Ali Abdelaziz to make his own fighters some money, so Moraes pretty much chose to get paid, and rightfully so, but with WSOF falling apart, it's probably the right time for Moraes to make a run in UFC. And they're throwing him right into the fire - Moraes faces top-five contender Raphael Assuncao at UFC 212 in June, and with a win there, he's probably only a fight or two away from a title shot. *And since there's not much of anything else, let's do the chronological rundown. UFC 211's lineup next month seems finalized - Chase Sherman replaces Jarjis Danho in a heavyweight bout against Dmitry Poberezhets, and debuting featherweights Jared Gordon and Michel Quinones will also go at it on the deep prelims. The Gordon/Quinones fight seems to fill up the card, and no word yet what happens to the rumored Gadzhimurad Antigulov/Joachim Christensen fight that seems to no longer have a spot on this card. That fight was always a weird fit for a card in Texas, so I wouldn't be surprised if it popped up on, say, the Stockholm card a few weeks later. June only adds three fights - that Assuncao/Moraes fight mentioned above is joined by a strawweight bout between Jamie Moyle and Viviane Pereira at UFC 212, and the Auckland card adds top Australian prospect Alexander Volkanovski having his sophomore UFC effort against Japanese vet Mizuto Hirota. From there, we go to the TUF 25 finale, which adds three fairly solid fights - fringe top-fifteen middleweights Elias Theodorou and Brad Tavares square off, Gray Maynard returns to take on Japanese prospect Teruto Ishihara, and top light heavyweight prospect Jordan Johnson takes on Marcel Fortuna, who made his debut in February by knocking out heavyweight Anthony Hamilton. UFC 213 adds an undercard bout between top heavyweight prospect Curtis Blaydes and Daniel Omielanczuk, and the Fox card from Long Island has a second rumored bout, as local boy Gian Villante will apparently take on former hockey enforcer Steve Bosse in what should be a crazy brawl. ----- ROSTER CUTS: 1) Michael Graves (6-0-1 overall, 2-0-1 UFC, last fought 7/30/16, D vs. Bojan Velickovic): One of UFC's toothless investigations actually had consequences, as Graves was released following an investigation into a domestic violence incident late last year. Graves came into UFC via that weird American Top Team versus Blackzilians season of TUF, and the ATT member was given the "redemption" arc in editing, losing his first fight and being portrayed as a lazy screw-up, but eventually getting his act together and scoring a submission win over Jason Jackson. From there, Graves actually looked like a talent, a pretty effective wrestler who made wins over Vicente Luque and Randy Brown look easy, but, well that's all out the window now. Don't hit women. ----- UPCOMING UFC SHOWS: 5/13 - UFC 211 - Dallas, TX - Stipe Miocic ( c ) vs. Junior dos Santos, Joanna Jedrzejczyk ( c ) vs. Jessica Andrade, Demian Maia vs. Jorge Masvidal, Frankie Edgar vs. Yair Rodriguez, Eddie Alvarez vs. Dustin Poirier 5/28 - UFC Fight Night 109 - Stockholm, Sweden - Alexander Gustafsson vs. Glover Teixeira 6/3 - UFC 212 - Rio De Janeiro, Brazil - Jose Aldo ( c ) vs. Max Holloway (ic), Claudia Gadelha vs. Karolina Kowalkiewicz 6/10 - UFC Fight Night 110 - Auckland, New Zealand - Mark Hunt vs. Derrick Lewis, Derek Brunson vs. Daniel Kelly 6/17 - UFC Fight Night 111 - Singapore, Singapore - Bethe Correia vs. Holly Holm, Colby Covington vs. Dong Hyun Kim, Rafael dos Anjos vs. Tarec Saffiedine 6/25 - UFC Fight Night 112 - Oklahoma City, OK - Michael Chiesa vs. Kevin Lee, B.J. Penn vs. Dennis Siver, Tim Boetsch vs. Johny Hendricks, Ilir Latifi vs. Antonio Rogerio Nogueira 7/7 - TUF 25 Finale - Las Vegas, NV - Brad Tavares vs. Elias Theodorou, Teruto Ishihara vs. Gray Maynard 7/8 - UFC 213 - Las Vegas, NV - Cody Garbrandt ( c ) vs. T.J. Dillashaw, Donald Cerrone vs. Robbie Lawler, Alistair Overeem vs. Fabricio Werdum 7/22 - UFC on Fox 25 - Uniondale, NY - Chan Sung Jung vs. Ricardo Lamas, Steve Bosse vs. Gian Villante ----- UFC Fight Night 108 - April 22, 2017 - Bridgestone Arena - Nashville, Tennessee So this is the last of three straight cards before, amazingly, another three-week break, and it's a pretty fun comedown from last week's excellent Kansas City card. And, like a lot of cards this year, it's pretty much emblematic of the state of UFC's matchmaking in 2017 - the undercard has a ton of interesting matchups that could either go either way or have some sort of fun style interaction, but the main event picture is a bit of a mess. And boy, is this main event a mess. A dumb, dumb main event. It's a bad main event. But don't let that distract you from the fact that this is still a fun card, and hell, even that dumb main event will probably be a fun one in some aspect. MAIN CARD (Fox Sports 1 - 10:00 PM ET): Featherweight: (#4) Cub Swanson vs. Artem Lobov Lightweight: (#14) Al Iaquinta vs. Diego Sanchez Light Heavyweight: (#8) Ovince St. Preux vs. Marcos Rogerio de Lima Bantamweight: (#7) John Dodson vs. (#10) Eddie Wineland Lightweight: Joe Lauzon vs. Stevie Ray Welterweight: (#13) Jake Ellenberger vs. Mike Perry PRELIMINARY CARD (Fox Sports 2 - 8:00 PM ET): Middleweight: (#11) Thales Leites vs. (#13) Sam Alvey Flyweight: (#9) Dustin Ortiz vs. (#10) Brandon Moreno Lightweight: Scott Holtzman vs. Michael McBride Women's Strawweight: (#14) Jessica Penne vs. Danielle Taylor PRELIMINARY CARD (UFC Fight Pass - 6:30 PM ET): Women's Bantamweight: (#10) Alexis Davis vs. Cindy Dandois Welterweight: Bryan Barberena vs. Joe Proctor Flyweight: Hector Sandoval vs. Matt Schnell THE RUNDOWN: Cub Swanson (24-7 overall, 9-3 UFC, 5-3 WEC) vs. Artem Lobov (14-12-1 [1] overall, 2-2 UFC): Well, at least Cub Swanson might finally have an easy night at the office. The possibility is still there, but it'll be a shame if Cub Swanson never earns his title rematch against Jose Aldo - in 2009, Aldo and Swanson, both elite prospects, squared off to see who would earn a WEC featherweight title shot, and Aldo turned Swanson from prospect to punchline, destroying him with a flying knee in just eight seconds. But once UFC absorbed WEC, it looked like Swanson was charging towards redemption, suddenly becoming one of 145's most feared knockout artists and reeling off six straight wins, until one-sided losses to Frankie Edgar and Max Holloway left him outside of the title picture and somewhat directionless. But after taking a year off to reevaluate and regroup, 2016 was a huge bounce-back year for Swanson; it's not that Swanson looked demonstrably better, honestly, but that it was a reminder that Cub Swanson is still pretty great - his comeback win over Hacran Dias was fairly workmanlike, but his win over Tatsuya Kawajiri was an excellent back-and-forth fight, and then there was his war last December with Doo Ho Choi. Most people figured Swanson would make for a fun stepping-stone opponent to send Choi into the featherweight title picture, but Swanson and "The Korean Superboy" instead had an insane, non-stop war, with each eating pretty much every bit of offense the other could provide, before Swanson got the nod in one of the best fights of 2016 and an instant classic added to the list of all-time great brawls. And now he fights Artem Lobov, which I guess makes sense if you view it as sort of a reward and a night off? Lobov, frankly, is only even in the UFC because he's the primary training partner and longtime friend of Conor McGregor. His record is ugly, yes, but he fought a tough slate of competition in Europe, and honestly, in a fair landscape, that would probably his role in the MMA universe - a tough European vet who's essentially the guy that actual prospects would need to beat to get into the UFC, and maybe a guy who could earn a short stint in the big time if he racked up a few wins. But instead, Lobov was put on a season of TUF in exchange for McGregor agreeing to coach it, and when Lobov lost his fight to get into the house, they made up some rule to add team members and get Lobov back onto the cast. To his credit, Lobov did make good on the second chance and got all the way to the finals, but Ryan Hall exposed his complete lack of a grappling game, and Lobov followed that up with a one-sided loss to Alex White. Again, most guys would've been cut after showing that little in UFC, but instead Lobov got a layup in Chris Avila - UFC matched the two up in a cute bit of matchmaking, as Avila is a teammate of the Diaz brothers, and this was on the undercard of the McGregor/Diaz rematch, so hey, teammate versus teammate, but Avila turned out to be one of the worst domestic fighters UFC has signed in recent history, so a one-sided win by Lobov was still rather uninspiring. In his last fight, I at least had some hope that Lobov was going to outgrow his status as a punchline, since he turned out a career-best performance over Japanese prospect Teruto Ishihara and actually looked like a UFC-level fighter, but instead UFC rushed him into this main event and pretty much burned any goodwill that performance would've given him. This, as one would assume, looks like an easy Swanson win - Lobov's game is fairly one-dimensional striking, and his short reach for his size has been a bit of a running joke in MMA circles; essentially, imagine trying to fight like Conor McGregor if you were an undersized Russian with none of the innate ability and physical talent that makes Conor what he is, and you essentially have Lobov. And even if Lobov hangs in there better than expected, he's not a huge knockout threat, particularly once you factor in the amount of abuse that Swanson has shown he's able to take. On the plus side, and I assume this is what whoever was responsible for this was looking at when they made this matchup, this could be pretty fun while it lasts, since both guys figure to just stand and bang, so...there's that. I'll laugh if Swanson just takes the easy way out and just immediately takes Lobov down and submits him, since that's probably on the table, but I assume we just get a fun, one-sided striking match for a bit - I'll give Lobov some extra credit since he's only been knocked out once in his career, but I think it says a lot about this fight that even when I'm trying to be nice, my pick is still Swanson by second-round knockout. I have no idea what that accomplishes, but hey, at least we'll get to see Cub Swanson wreck a dude, and why look a gift horse in the mouth. Al Iaquinta (12-3-1 overall, 7-2 UFC) vs. Diego Sanchez (27-9 overall, 16-9 UFC): Well, this is an interesting fight, and there's something darkly amusing about UFC matching two of the guys who best represent...I suppose you'd call it concussed insanity on the UFC roster. Long Island's Al Iaquinta is returning from a two-year layoff thanks to injuries and retirement, and if he hadn't come back, he would've at least went out on an extremely Al Iaquinta note - Iaquinta's last fight was a controversial split decision victory over Jorge Masvidal, and as the crowd booed the decision, Iaquinta used his post-fight interview to basically go on a profanity-filled tirade against the fans deciding to boo him. From there, UFC looked to book Iaquinta, then one of lightweight's top prospects, against Gilbert Melendez, but Melendez got a flagged drug test, Iaquinta decided to get some knee surgery, and then things just pretty much went downhill. First, UFC and Iaquinta feuded over the insurance payment for his surgery - UFC claimed it was suffered out of competition, while Iaquinta said it tied back to an initial injury suffered on TUF, and then there was a whole bunch of stuff with UFC punishing Iaquinta for missing a mandatory fighter meeting in Vegas, and some previous issues tying back to an incident where Iaquinta trashed a hotel room. Once Iaquinta was physically ready to fight again - he was linked to a fight with Thiago Alves a few times last year - he basically decided that between the hassle and the reduced money under the Reebok deal, fighting was no longer worth it, and he focused on his real estate business. I'm not really sure what changed his mind, but after meeting with matchmaker Sean Shelby a few months ago, Raging Al is back, and looking to pick up where he left off against fellow crazy person Diego Sanchez. Given that his style has mostly been predicated on his ability to take abuse, it's insane that Sanchez is the last guy still going from season one of The Ultimate Fighter - and even crazier, 2016 was his best year in a while. Before 2016, you could make a case that the last fight Sanchez deserved to win was all the way back in 2010, but he kicked the year off with a shockingly effective win over Jim Miller, where he pretty much outpaced Miller en route to earning a decision. Admittedly, the year wasn't all great - UFC 200 saw Joe Lauzon suddenly, and shockingly, become the first man to ever crack Sanchez's legendary chin and earn a knockout victory, but Sanchez then rebounded in November with a win over Marcin Held, where he pretty much shut down the Polish submission specialist with some good old-fashioned American wrestling. I don't look forward to Sanchez's later years in life - I didn't watch it, but apparently on the last edition of Ariel Helwani's show, Helwani asked one question that prompted Sanchez to give a forty-minute response - but for now, he's looking as good as you could expect late-career Diego Sanchez to look. This is essentially a coin flip fight, given how little we know about Iaquinta - his boxing is by far the strongest part of his game and should give Sanchez problems, but while Iaquinta has a wrestling background, it was kind of an ongoing thing that he'd find himself in trouble on the ground at least once per fight, which could happen here. If Iaquinta has any rust, Sanchez could easily just take the initiative and earn a decision through pressure and activity (or hell, not even earn the decision and get it anyway, as Sanchez has done a bunch of times), but with how badly Sanchez got cracked by Lauzon, the possibility of Sanchez rushing right into a knockout does loom. It's a hard one to call, and I've flip-flopped a few times, but I'll still give Iaquinta the benefit of the doubt and say he earns a narrow decision win by keeping this on the feet and being way more accurate standing - though really, it's hard to know exactly what's going to happen. Ovince St. Preux (19-10 overall, 7-5 UFC, 6-1 Strikeforce) vs. Marcos Rogerio de Lima (15-4-1 overall, 4-2 UFC, 0-1 Strikeforce): UFC was last in Nashville only about a year and a half ago, back in August of 2015, and what a difference that time has made for Ovince St. Preux. That 2015 show was pretty much built around St. Preux, a local favorite thanks to his days as a linebacker for the University of Tennessee, taking on Glover Teixeira, but a loss in that fight started a 1-4 run, and now OSP suddenly finds himself likely fighting for his job against Marcos Rogerio de Lima. St. Preux was always an interesting prospect - coming up, he was a ridiculous level of athlete for MMA, and both Strikeforce and UFC decided to slowly move him up the ladder, allowing him to rack up wins as fans got to wonder exactly what he'd become. But once St. Preux got a big spot against Ryan Bader, he simply got out-wrestled for twenty-five minutes, and from there, OSP sort of wound up in light heavyweight purgatory - his loyalty to his small camp in Tennessee sort of prevented his game from developing into anything coherent, which left him sorely lacking against the top fighters in the division, but his athleticism and dynamic finishing ability, especially coupled with such an unorthodox game, meant he could beat pretty much everyone outside of that top tier. After ping-ponging for a bit, St. Preux got a shot at Jon Jones after Daniel Cormier got hurt, simply by being the best guy available coming off a win, but Jones outclassed St. Preux, and things sort of spiralled from there. Again, St. Preux's game is sort of a weird collection of strikes and submissions without much connective tissue, and as St. Preux enters his mid-thirties and loses even just a bit of that explosive athleticism, the whole game is starting to fall apart. St. Preux's last fight, a narrow decision loss to Volkan Oezdemir, is a perfect example - while OSP had his moments and probably deserved the decision win, for most of his career, Oezdemir's the kind of guy that St. Preux would've just taken out with some sort of looping strike or funky submission. So, obviously, St. Preux needs a win here against TUF: Brazil alum de Lima, and given "Pezao"'s track record, we'll probably find out if he gets it in pretty short order. De Lima's average fight time in UFC is just a shade over two minutes, the lowest of any active fighter with any sort of track record, and watching him fight, that's about right - Pezao's just sort of a power monster, throwing heat behind every punch, and knowing just enough when it comes to grappling to get himself into trouble, as it's done in his two submission losses. This fight is basically a coin flip - it's basically a test to see if St. Preux still has any of his dynamic finishing ability left, since de Lima's there to be stopped, but if he can't, the Brazilian should finish things in fairly short order himself. I was originally leaning towards picking St. Preux by submission, since again, de Lima's just confident enough in his grappling game to get himself tapped out, and OSP's got a weird collection of tricks that could stop someone as defensively open as de Lima, but the more I think about this fight, and the more broken that OSP's game seems to look, I'm going to go with de Lima deflating the crowd with a first-round knockout. John Dodson (18-8 overall, 7-3 UFC) vs. Eddie Wineland (23-11-1 overall, 5-5 UFC, 5-2 WEC): A really interesting fight here, pitting two veteran knockout artists against each other. Longtime flyweight contender John Dodson can be a bit frustrating to watch - he's from that Uriah Hall/Yoel Romero mold of fighter that spends fights either being completely inactive or exploding with bursts of violence - but he was able to beat everyone he faced save Demetrious Johnson at 125, and early returns after his move up to bantamweight are pretty good. Dodson didn't waste time in his first fight up, blitzing Manny Gamburyan for a 47-second win, and while his follow-up main event fight against John Lineker was a narrow decision loss, it saw Dodson finally execute a gameplan in trying to get the win - and one that probably would've worked if Lineker didn't have a superhuman ability to just eat Dodson's power. Dodson looks to rebound here against Indiana's Eddie Wineland, who's having a bit of a career resurgence. WEC's original bantamweight champion, Wineland lost his shot at then-bantamweight champ Renan Barao in 2013, then his career started to spiral a bit - Johnny Eduardo scored a huge upset win with a knockout of Wineland that broke his jaw, and after recovering from that, Wineland surprisingly got out-pointed on the feet by Bryan Caraway. Wineland then took some time to regroup, and a lot of people figured he was going to retire, but 2016 saw him come back and get some momentum going, handling tough vets Frankie Saenz and Takeya Mizugaki fairly easily. Wineland's probably not going on a run towards another title shot, but he's somehow still only 32 years old, so there may be more years left for him as an action gatekeeper than any of us expect. It's an interesting fight, and one I go back and forth on, since Dodson's style has typically been so hit-or-miss - his old sponsorship with Pop Rocks was pretty much perfect, as he's a tiny ball of energy dependent on moments of explosive knockout power, but if he can't score that finish, one wonders about his ability to win rounds. And Wineland's looked good, and has that unorthodox style that could keep Dodson on his toes, so I could easily see him score the upset victory via decision. But I'll still favor Dodson to win - he looked less patient in the Gamburyan fight, which is a positive, and as mentioned, the Lineker fight showed that he may yet learn how to fight smarter. I do have some concerns that, like OSP in the fight above, whenever Dodson's athleticism slips just a bit (and he's 32 at the moment), his whole game could just fall apart, but I'll call for him to eventually either adjust or find an opening and score a third-round knockout, probably in a fight that's either close or has him losing. Hopefully, it's more of a brawl and less of a staring contest. Joe Lauzon (27-12 overall, 14-9 UFC) vs. Stevie Ray (20-6 overall, 4-1 UFC): This should be a pretty fun fight, since, well, it's a Joe Lauzon fight - a decade into his UFC career, the Bostonian is still going strong as one of UFC's surer action bets, and one of the lightweight division's better gatekeepers for seeing if someone can move their way up the ladder. January's fight with Marcin Held saw...mixed results, as the Polish submission specialist probably controlled Lauzon enough to take the nod, but in the end, the judges had the fight for Lauzon, who actually protested the win during his post-fight interview. But, win or lose, Lauzon will pretty much always be a fan favorite and division stalwart, and the returns here to face Scotland's Stevie Ray. Ray's gotten some hype after a pretty good European career and two impressive finishes to start his UFC career, but things sort of plateaued from there - for all his well-rounded offense, a loss to Alan Patrick showed that Ray still has a ton of work to do on his defensive wrestling, and his last fight was a split decision win over Ross Pearson that was solid, if not particularly impressive. I really see Ray settling into a role more like, well, Pearson, as a mid-tier action fighter that can do well on European cards, rather than some sort of future contender, but I think he can take a fun decision win here over Lauzon. As mentioned, the Patrick fight showed that Ray's main weakness is someone who can take him down and control him, and as gifted a grappler as Lauzon is, I don't see him as that type of guy - Lauzon's game is more based on scrambles and hopping on submissions in the chaos rather than controlling things on the ground. And from there, I can pretty much see Ray picking Lauzon apart on the feet, if never getting particularly dominant. So while I'm picking Ray to win, I still figure it'll be a close one, and a fun one, since, well, it's a Joe Lauzon fight. Jake Ellenberger (31-12 overall, 10-8 UFC, 1-0 Bellator) vs. Mike Perry (9-1 overall, 2-1 UFC): Welp, UFC's still trying with Mike Perry. I can see why, since in the cage, Perry's a fun as hell prospect - for someone so raw, he has a solid command over his limited game, and it's an exciting one, a power boxing game built around Perry's explosive athleticism and ability to knock fools the hell out. But on the downside, there is literally everything else about Mike Perry. Him and teammate Alex Nicholson are pretty much the human embodiment of Florida - while Perry doesn't have Nicholson's domestic violence incidents, Perry has the similar level of casual racism and homophobia that you'd expect from a guy who started training MMA on a lark as he was getting driven home from prison. And then there's just the more innocuous douchebaggery - Perry is the kind of guy who, after notching his first UFC win, used the money to get his nickname, "Platinum", tattooed over his eyebrow. Sigh. Perry got taken out of his depth a bit by Alan Jouban, who just used technical striking to pretty much shut Perry down, so Perry looks to rebound here against Jake Ellenberger, who continues to try and fight off his late-career slide. When Ellenberger faced off with Rory MacDonald in the summer of 2013, it figured to be an exciting brawl between two top contenders, but instead, just kind of wound up as a flat matchup where both guys looked timid - and while this proved to be a one-off for MacDonald, with Ellenberger, it became a trend. That started a run where Ellenberger just seemed unable to pull the trigger and wound up losing five of six, with the only win coming over a shot Josh Koscheck. Hell, after his loss last year to Tarec Saffiedine, UFC apparently outright cut him, and Ellenberger decided to fly to Vegas, where he successfully lobbied for one more shot. And, amazingly, Ellenberger cashed in, hitting the liver kick of his life against Matt Brown, and essentially saving his career with a sudden knockout win. But honestly, that just looks like an outlier, as Ellenberger looked flat again in his last fight, losing to Jorge Masvidal in one-sided fashion before a weird stoppage after Ellenberger's toe got stuck in the cage. I suppose Ellenberger could hit a hail mary knockout blow again, or suddenly regain his form under original coach Rafael Cordeiro, who's been working with Ellenberger in his last few fights, but this really seems like a fight where Perry's going to be the younger, quicker, more aggressive fighter and pick Ellenberger apart. I'll take Perry via second-round knockout, and don't really feel all that great about it. Thales Leites (26-7 overall, 11-6 UFC) vs. Sam Alvey (30-8 [1] overall, 7-3 UFC, 1-1 Bellator): God help us all, "Smilin'" Sam Alvey is making a run up the middleweight ladder. I'm a fan of Alvey's, but the whole package is just delightfully weird - outside of the cage, Alvey is pure cheese (appropriately enough, since he's from Wisconsin) - a giant ginger, Alvey's always got a big, goofy grin on his face, and his seemingly always-pregnant ex-model wife acting as one of his corner(wo)men. The best way I can sum up the whole Sam Alvey aesthetic is this is a man who walks out to Train's "Hey Soul Sister", and it somehow fits right into the whole package. And inside the cage, it's not like Alvey is any less weird, as he's as pure a counter-fighter as you'll ever see - at times, Alvey is almost devoted to inactivity, waiting for his perfect shot, but when he senses his opened, he'll send a giant straight punch right down the pike, and that's knocked a bunch of his opponents out. And lately, he's even done enough to earn decision victories, as he's coming off nods from the judges against Alex Nicholson and Nate Marquardt. Amazingly, Alvey's fought five times in the last year, winning his last four - having kids ain't cheap, and it's been amusing to see Alvey beg for fights in Australia, Europe and Mexico in order to get a paid family vacation - and he looks to break through with win number five against Thales Leites. Leites has had a strange career arc - a horribly boring fight against Anderson Silva for the middleweight title pretty much put Leites on the fast track to being cut in 2009, and UFC only re-signed him in 2013 as a favor to then-featherweight champ Jose Aldo. But Leites suddenly reeled off a five-fight win streak upon his return, and even more surprisingly, some of those fights were actually exciting, as Leites suddenly discovered that you could throw strikes in a MMA fight, and flashed some knockout power to boot. That eventually hit a clear ceiling - a loss to Michael Bisping was narrow, but two of Leites's last three fights have seen Gegard Mousasi and Krzysztof Jotko handle him rather easily - but Leites should be able to hang around as a gatekeeper for a few more years. I...do not know what to expect from this fight. Leites's striking, as mentioned, is as good as it's ever been, and he may be active enough to just win a decision over Alvey based solely on that, but Leites's huge advantage should be if he can get this to the ground. And I'm not sure he can do that. Alvey's done a pretty solid job of keeping himself upright, and even flashed some submission chops, like his strange front guillotine that tapped out Eric Spicely. But normally, when opponents try and work takedowns on Alvey, he can usually turn it into an ugly clinch battle, and mostly get the better of things from there. And the more I think about this, the more I do expect this to be an ugly, ugly fight that's mostly fifteen minutes of blah clinchwork, and I'll actually favor Leites, even though such a fight would probably turn into one of those split decisions that has you questioning the meaning of life. Plus, I think there's a better shot of Leites being able to complete takedowns - at which point he should be able to work over Alvey pretty solidly, if not just tap him out - than Smilin' Sam being able to land that big knockout punch. So yeah, weird fight, and sadly probably not in an interesting way, and I'm picking Leites via decision to send Alvey back down the ladder. Dustin Ortiz (16-6 overall, 5-4 UFC, 2-0 Strikeforce) vs. Brandon Moreno (13-3 overall, 2-0 UFC): A sleeper for fight of the night, particularly since the Nashville crowd should have a rooting interest, given that Dustin Ortiz is a Tennessee product. Flyweight is a shark tank - UFC doesn't have a particularly large division, but almost everyone in it is really freaking good, and Ortiz's career is emblematic of that. Ortiz has wins over top prospects like Ray Borg and Justin Scoggins, and his losses have come to three former title challengers and Jussier Formiga, but he still needed a win over Zach Makovsky to even hang onto his spot on the roster. There are no easy nights at 125, and even though Ortiz had a career-best performance in that Makovsky fight and is theoretically taking a minor step down in competition, he's still in for a hell of a fight against another top prospect in Brandon Moreno. Mexico's Moreno impressed in his lone fight on this past season of TUF - he was seeded sixteenth on the cast and gave a game effort in a loss to the much more decorated Alexandre Pantoja - but really made good on his late-notice UFC debut, as he took a fight with Louis Smolka on about a week's notice last October, and clamped on a first-round guillotine for one of the biggest upsets of the year. And things have gone swimmingly since then - he looked excellent in a follow-up win over Ryan Benoit, and combined with the tremendous charisma that Moreno has shown in his post-fight interviews, UFC may have yet another potential Mexican star on their hands. Honestly, I could see this a lot like last weekend's fight of the night between Tim Elliott and Smolka, as this figures to just be a non-stop scramble-fest between two guys most comfortable going to the ground and creating chaos. I'll favor Ortiz to take the decision, but given the strides Moreno has been making fight by fight, a sudden improvement here wouldn't surprise me - hell, just pencil this in for a split decision and a round of applause when it's all over. Scott Holtzman (9-2 overall, 2-2 UFC) vs. Michael McBride (8-2 overall, 0-1 UFC, 1-0 Bellator): Probably the least relevant fight on the card, as each of these guys might be fighting for their UFC jobs, but it could still be a fun one, since Scott Holtzman is a local fighter, and a pretty entertaining one at that. A former minor league hockey player, Holtzman's mostly a raw athlete who relies on his physical tools, and his UFC career has been a mixed bag - he's beaten some lower-tier fighters, but couldn't even get past a journeyman like Drew Dober. Still, you can see potential for Holtzman as an action fighter and fan favorite, particularly after his last fight against Josh Emmett, where both guys' physicality and lack of defense turned out to be a fun brawl and one of the highlights of December's card in Sacramento. Holtzman looks to get back on track against Iowa's Michael McBride, who's looking to rebound from an unimpressive UFC debut. A giant submission specialist, McBride took a late notice fight against Nik Lentz that was an absolutely awful matchup, as Lentz just overpowered and threw around McBride before pounding him out late in the second round. McBride's path to victory seems pretty simple here - get things to the ground, and from there just work for a submission that he can probably get, since again, Holtzman is more athlete than anything. But I have concerns if he can get it there - again, Lentz is an awful matchup, but for all his size, McBride did get thrown around pretty easily, and just sort of generally looked like a guy who would have trouble imposing anything on the kind of athletes that are up and down the UFC roster. So, for that reason, I'll say Holtzman mostly shuts down McBride's game, works him over on the feet, and then eventually gets a late stoppage in the third, but there's always the chance that McBride could get his ground game going and make me look really dumb for predicting that. Jessica Penne (12-4 overall, 1-2 UFC, 3-1 Invicta, 1-1 Bellator) vs. Danielle Taylor (8-2 overall, 1-1 UFC): This'll be weird. Jessica Penne's UFC career hasn't gone exactly as planned - a former atomweight champion with Invicta and one of the top 105ers in the world, Penne did quite well when she moved up to strawweight and was part of UFC's tournament to crown an inaugural champ, as Penne made it all the way to the final four before falling to eventual winner Carla Esparza. Then Penne took a narrow win from Randa Markos to establish herself as a top contender, and then...it all pretty much went to hell. Penne did in fact get a title shot at Joanna Jedrzejczyk, who was champ by then, but Jedrzejczyk destroyed her in one of the more brutally one-sided title fights you'll ever see. In fact, that went badly enough that Penne required surgery on her nose, and after taking a year off to get that taken care off, Penne came back and...promptly got shellacked by Jessica Andrade, who was making her debut at 115 before streaking towards her own title shot against Jedrzejczyk. So Penne badly needs a win to turn things around, and a fight against Danielle Taylor just might do the trick. Taylor looked to be a weird, fun addition to the strawweight ranks, but instead it's just kind of been all-weird, no-fun. At five feet even, Taylor is probably the tiniest human to ever compete in the Octagon, and both her fights have been kind of a mess. Taylor just sort of circles at range and then tries to dive-bomb in with knockout shots, but it hasn't really accomplished much of anything - both her UFC fights just sort of saw her circle at a far enough range that nobody really connected with anything, and that was somehow enough to get her a decision win over Seohee Ham in her last fight. It's hard to tell how this one is going to look, unless it's just another weird circle-fest; Penne's main problem is that when she gets hit solidly, she gets scared off badly and starts to back up against the cage - and fitting enough given her last name, Penne is pretty much done once she starts sticking to the wall. But I don't know if Taylor can connect with that shot, and given how cautious she's been in her UFC fights, if she can even follow up if she's able to rock Penne. Plus Penne figures to be Taylor's first opponent that looks for takedowns and the submission - that's where Penne is best, and I have no idea how Taylor will react if Penne just tries to chase her down and take things to the mat. Just a strange fight - I'll go with Penne via submission in, say, the second round, but I worry this is just going to devolve into two overly cautious fighters and just wind up being the bad sort of weird, like Taylor's last two fights. Alexis Davis (17-7 overall, 4-2 UFC, 2-0 Invicta, 2-1 Strikeforce) vs. Cindy Dandois (8-2 overall, 2-1 Invicta): A really fun, interesting fight here, particularly if it winds up going to the ground. I understand why a lot of people don't take Cindy Dandois seriously - she's a chesty Belgian with a goofy personality and a penchant for weird Disney cosplay - but she's actually a pretty solid fighter, at least grappling-wise. While I wouldn't trust her to win a kickboxing match, she has a pretty solid judoka base and is pretty damn good with her submissions; she's the last person to beat current Invicta featherweight champ Megan Anderson, and won her last fight in Invicta via a pretty sweet unorthodox straight armbar against Jessamyn Duke. Given that she splits time between 135 and 145, one would think Dandois would be a natural to move up if UFC ever decides they want to have an actual women's featherweight division, but since they apparently don't, she makes her UFC debut against former bantamweight title challenger Alexis Davis. Davis was one of the victims of Ronda Rousey's path of rage, getting hit with seemingly a million punches before getting finished in sixteen seconds back in 2014, and Davis has been fairly inactive since then - she beat Sarah Kaufman via come-from-behind submission in early 2015, then took some time off to have a baby before returning this past December. And that comeback fight didn't go all too well - Sara McMann was able to survive on the ground with Davis and actually wound up sinking on her own fight-ending arm triangle choke, suggesting that Davis's grappling-heavy game may have some problems against this new wave of athletes that's coming up in women's MMA. I don't know if Dandois qualifies as that, but it's still kind of a coin flip of a fight - I always have trouble calling these submission artist versus submission artist bouts, since there's so many factors going on with how those styles interact. Neither woman is much on the feet, so I'm assuming this is going to be close to a straight grappling match, and I think I actually favor Dandois, since she seems to have the more versatile game - and even if she's not an amazing athlete herself, she should be the bigger woman and be able to bull Davis around a bit. So I'll take Dandois to clamp on something weird, and let's call it a second-round submission, though really, I'm just hoping for a fun fight. Bryan Barberena (12-4 overall, 3-2 UFC) vs. Joe Proctor (11-4 overall, 4-3 UFC): 2016 saw Bryan Barberena become a bit of a thing - I liked him as a gritty mid-tier lightweight, and when Barberena decided to move up to welterweight, he wound up being the lucky guy to get a shot at Sage Northcutt that January. And Barberena cashed in on it, just pretty much waiting things out until he could get Northcutt to the ground, and tapping the boy wonder in fairly short order from there. Things got amusing from there, as UFC was obviously not happy with Barberena judging by their matchmaking - they paired him up with undefeated Brazilian prospect Warlley Alves, and, amazingly, Barberena survived yet again, weathering a tough first round to take over and score a decision win, one of the bigger upsets of 2016. But the third time wasn't the charm, as Barberena didn't really have much of an answer for Colby Covington's power wrestling game, as UFC finally found a prospect that could overwhelm Barberena. So Barberena looks to rebound from that loss, and it looks like UFC is pretty much shunting him to the journeyman circuit, as he faces Boston's Joe Proctor, who moves up from lightweight himself to make his debut at 170. This seems flippant, but Proctor really is just kind of a guy - he can strike a little, he's got some pretty good grappling, and the whole package makes for a fairly unnotable lower-tier gatekeeper. He's beaten guys like Justin Salas and Cristiano Marcello who never made much of an impact in UFC, but he's been quite overmatched against anything better than that. And, well, Barberena is better than that. He's not flashy at all, so I just kind of expect Barberena to grind out a fairly ugly, one-sided decision, and, well, maybe they can put him against an interesting prospect after that, since gatekeeper is pretty much Barberena's destiny. Hector Sandoval (13-3 overall, 1-1 UFC) vs. Matt Schnell (10-3 overall, 0-1 UFC): We should kick things off on a fun note here, as two action flyweights go at it. Hector Sandoval's one of seemingly a million Team Alpha Male products that populate the lower weight classes, though unlike many, he seems to be more of a speedy striker than your typical wrestler/submission artist that you get out of Sacramento. When Demetrious Johnson was forced to drop out of his initial fight against Wilson Reis, Sandoval was the guy that Reis ran through instead, but Sandoval rebounded this past December with a fairly one-sided decision win over Fredy Serrano. Sandoval looks to make it two in a row against Louisiana's Matt Schnell, who's looking to rebound from a poor UFC debut himself. Schnell, who was apparently a star on a MTV reality show a few years ago called "Caged", if that means anything to anyone, impressed a bit on the all-flyweight season of TUF last year, but moved up to bantamweight for a late-notice UFC debut against Rob Font and got handled pretty easily. So now he moves down to his usual weight class, and it'll make for an interesting contrast, as Schnell is pretty big for the division at 5'8", while Sandoval is just 5'2". I'll take Schnell here - I've been pretty high on him whenever I've watched him, as he's got an impressive dynamic submission game and has some solid knockout power, on top of his size for the division. I do have his concerns once he's against guys who can take him into deep waters - Schnell hasn't had a decision win since the first fight of his career - but I'm not sure Sandoval is that guy. So I'll take Schnell by first-round submission, and then hopefully onto more interesting fights from there.

#ufc nashville #ufcnashville #ufc fight night 108 #ufcfightnight108 #ufn 108 #ufn108 #ufc #mma

[gtspousegroup]

Jessica

This is Jessica. She is from Colombia. She still misses the flavors of her home country, but by cooking typical Colombian dishes - like her favorite; Maduro, bananas that have been cut in half and baked with cheese in the middle - she brings her home town back to life in her own kitchen. “It is delicious! I love it!”

In Atlanta, Jessica now has time to focus on doing the things she enjoys. Aside from improving her English by taking English classes at the Georgia Tech Language Institute, she is very excited about her newest project: opening a youtube channel that deals exclusively with psychology, featuring informative videos on relevant subjects that she has created herself in both English and Spanish. She also loves spending her time painting her friends’ nails and creating beautiful nail art designs for them. “In my university I used to paint the nails of all my friends. Here in Atlanta, I also did it for some of my friends. One of them told me: you should make a picture of your nails for promotion. Then, I posted this picture in the Georgia Tech International Spouse Group and some of them came to my house to get their nails done. I think this is good, because I can paint speak with them and I learn about these girls and their stories.”

Just like she loves the diversity of the various regional cultures of her beloved Colombia, from congenial and chatty in her hometown Cali to happy and loud or more reserved in the southern and northern regions, Jessica loves the eclectic mix of cultures she has been able to experience in Atlanta. This was also what attracted her to the Georgia Tech International Spouse Group, where she could meet and find support from men and women from all over the world, who have all followed their spouse to Atlanta and who find themselves in the same situation. “I met a lot of women from different countries there and they were very kind to me from the beginning and I have made some good friends there. I think this is very important! Meeting people from different cultures, I think this is very special to me. I try to ask them about their history, culture, language… I like to learn about that!” For Jessica, especially the multitude of religions that come together in the melting pot that is the United States has been a true revelation for her. “When I arrived in Atlanta, I visited the Martin Luther King Memorial and while I was sitting in his church with my best friend, I realized that, because she is a Buddhist, this was not her god; she believes in another god. Now, learning about all those other gods has made me think differently…”

Even though she is happy they decided to take advantage of the opportunity to live abroad, she has also realized that she wants to help Colombia grow and prosper. For her, Colombia is often a misunderstood and undervalued place, with a lot of beauty and good qualities, hidden away under layers of grime. “Colombia has good things, but we need to work on it in Colombia. They need us more there than here in the United States. I love my country very much… We are always improving our life and I believe that Colombia is at the start of a new history!”

Make up by Denise Batista, Writing by Tineke Van Varenberg, Conceived and Photographed by Sonal Sukheeja

#sonalsukheeja #photography #internationalspouses #georgia tech #colombia #atlanta #humansofgatech