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#and i really need to get my therapist back because i ain't having a good time
auteurdelabre · 4 months
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Daddy Morales pt. 3 Frankie!Morales x f!Reader
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Daddy Morales pt 2
Rating: 18+ (seriously young ones, this AIN'T for you)
Pairings: Frankie Morales x f!reader babysitter (in her mid 20's)
Tags: switch!Frankie, daddy kink, dirty talk, infidelity, phone sex but not, masturbation, dry (but also wet?) humping,
A/n: Happy Frankie Friday!
More Frankie x babysitter smut because y'all are askin' for it. I feel real amused that my two most commented on series right now are the sleazebag ones.
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Part 3: No More
Frankie decides to end things the next time he drives you home the following week. 
He hasn't fucked you, not actually sheathed himself in your pussy and he convinces himself that this isn't as bad. That he hasn't technically cheated. 
But he never confesses to Carmen. What good would it do? Carmen insists they start up with marriage counseling and Frankie agrees.Their marriage counselor says he and Carmen need to work on communication. On making more time for each other's interests. On being kinder to one another. 
When he tells you all of this he expects you to be upset. To scream or cry. But you do neither. You listen to him and you nod and you kiss his cheek and tell him you understand. 
Frankie drives home that night relieved and yet confused. 
You don't try anything when he drives you home after babysitting the following week. Or the week after that. You simply say thank you and leave the truck. 
He can't stop thinking about you though. He's taken to jerking off in bed next to Carmen when she sleeps or coming in the shower with a muffled groan. 
When he sees your number pop up on his phone later that month his cock actually stiffens under his jeans. 
"Hello?"
"Hi Mister Morales, I'm really sorry I'm just hoping that you could come look at my sink? It's backed up. I've asked all my friends but none of them are free and I don't have the money to get a plumber out here."
"Yeah of course," Frankie says, hearing the panic in your voice. "I'll come over right away."
He heads home to grabs his toolbox. Carmen is sitting in the kitchen feeding Luca. She glances over when she sees Frankie hoisting the red box from under the stairs. 
"Where are you going?" Carmen asks, her face troubled. "Did you forget we're meeting friends for dinner tonight?"
"’Course not," Frankie insists. "Just one of my old buddies sink is fucked and I'm going to help him out. I'll be back in plenty of time." 
"That's really sweet of you to help your friend," Carmen says remembering what the therapist said about giving Frankie more compliments. She stands and presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth. 
Shame hangs over Frankie like a cloud as he drives over to your place. He remembers what happened the last time he was there and he knows it can't happen again. He needs to give his marriage another shot. 
///
You're wearing a short dress and your feet are bare. 
That’s the first thing Frankie notices when you open the door, grinning brightly as you greet him.
"You look nice," Frankie says, eyes sliding over your body as he walks into your space. 
"Thanks I have a date," you say with a tense smile. "And thanks again for doing this. It's just there in the kitchen."
A date? Frankie hides his displeasure as you lead him into the kitchen.
You hold in a sigh as Frankie opens his toolbox and starts making noise there. His back muscles ripple as he kneels down and peers under your sink. 
"I'll leave you," you breathe. "Just lemme know if you need me for anything."
You leave, trying to stop the thrumming between your legs. 
Frankie leans back under the sink on his back now, looking for the leak. He spots it fairly quickly, grateful it's not a complicated job.
"Okay I need you to turn on the tap," Frankie calls out. "Need to make sure of something."
He hears you padding over. His eyes dart down to see your bare legs brushing his. You're standing hovered above his torso. His eyes travel up your bare thighs and Frankie holds in a moan when he sees your red panties fully on display under the dress. They cling to the outline of your pussy, delicious and beckoning. 
"Is it working?" you ask curiously when Frankie goes quiet.
"Mhmm," Frankie nods, willing his cock to go down. "You can turn it off now."
You turn it off and walk back into the other room as Frankie tries to steady his breathing. But he can't stop thinking about those red panties. Frankie starts as his phone vibrates. 
You on your way home??
Soon. Taking longer than expected
Kk. I'll just meet you at the restaurant
see you there
When he sees that the leak has been fixed and the tube tightened properly he knows he can leave. And yet he hesitates.  
Don't do it.
"Just need ya to turn it on again," Frankie croaks loudly. 
"Okay," you call back from the other room. 
You walk back over, short skirt flipping around your hips. Again you step over him to reach the tap and again he takes the opportunity to stare at your barely covered pussy. 
Frankie is laying under the sink thinking about how you're going on a date tonight. How another man is going to get to taste that cunt and it infuriates him. 
You turn on the sink, legs spread as you wait for him to tell you to turn it off. Instead Frankie's hand goes to your leg, reveling in its silken texture. 
"You look really nice babygirl," Frankie murmurs, his hand skimming up your calf. "Really pretty."
"You already said that," you reply shakily before moving out of Frankie's grip. Frankie can see the way your thighs press together. 
"Thanks for looking at the sink" you say, smiling gently down at him. "Uh, I'm just gonna finish getting ready. Let me know if you need anything else from me." 
He knows what he wants from you. What he can't have. 
Frankie gathers his tools and tells himself he's going to leave. That he did this favor for you and now he has to go. But he hears the sound of you giggling in your bedroom and he follows the noise. 
You're standing faced away from him looking out the window. Your cell phone is pressed to your ear. 
"Yeah I'm really excited," you say, twirling your hair around your finger. You giggle into the phone and Frankie feels his stomach twist. 
"Okay see you later." 
You end the call and turn to see Frankie standing awkwardly in the doorframe to your bedroom. 
"I'm finished up," he tells you before smiling weakly. 
"Thank you so much," you tell him. Before he can stop you, you've thrown your arms around his neck. You hug him tightly and he responds immediately by wrapping his arms around you. 
"I don't know what I would have done without your help. I really couldn't afford a plumber right now."
"It's no problem," Frankie assures you, still rocking you gently in his arms. "Always glad to help ya."
You hum against his neck in response and Frankie feels his resolve begin to slip. It's like he can't help himself from sliding his hands from your waist over the globe of your ass. 
You don't move away, you just melt against him. His hands bring up the skirt to your waist before sliding back and feeling the smooth skin of your ass as he grabs handfuls.  
The skin is so smooth and warm. He cups both cheeks in his hand, pulling them apart and watches over your shoulder as they fall back when he releases them. 
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing," Frankie murmurs as he begins to rub his front against yours. 
"Doesn't feel like nothing." You sigh against his jaw. "Feels like you're waiting for something."
"For what?"
Frankie watches you slowly get down on your knees for him. 
"My mouth, Daddy."
Frankie watches from under lowered lids as you begin to unzip his jeans. He feels his breathing constrict when you take him out of his boxers and his cock hangs there in front of you. It's already hard, brushing against your lower lip. 
"Yeah," Frankie breathes. "I was-"
Frankie feels his pocket suddenly vibrate as a text comes through. 
Carmen. 
Suddenly the enormity of what he's doing is upon him and he panics. 
"I'm sorry," Frankie stammers, trying to pull away. "This was a bad idea, I never should've-"
But he can't say anything more because your mouth has found the tip and begun to lightly lick. 
"Just wanted to thank you for fixing my sink," you say between licks. Frankie whimpers when your mouth parts and you take his cock into your mouth, moaning as you do. 
Frankie feels his head tilting back and he grabs the doorframe for support as all the blood in his body rushes between his legs.  
"Fuck.... Babygirl your mouth ..." Frankie groans as you suck him deeper. "So good."
His eyes crack open and he holds in a sigh when he sees you there on your knees with your eyes looking up at him, pretty mouth stuffed full. He wants to enjoy it more but his pocket is vibrating again. Frankie stiffens all over, panic swirling. 
Not thinking he pulls it from his pocket and you pull off of him, irritated.
Where are you?
Before he can reply you take the phone from him and toss it under the bed. Frankie watches it vibrate a moment before you're back licking him. 
"Carmen is waiting for me," Frankie explains, feeling helpless as your hand slides up under his t-shirt to splay across his belly, relishing in the hard curve there.
"She can wait."
"Babygirl, I have to leave," Frankie whimpers, watching your mouth bob along his cock. He hisses when you pull off of him, your mouth wet with saliva. 
"You really wanna go?" You ask dragging your tongue along his shaft. Frankie whimpers when your tongue flicks the underside of the head. 
"I should-"
"You don't wanna fuck my mouth?" You ask, mouth sucking the tip lightly. "You don't wanna come on my tongue?" 
"I fucking do," Frankie almost whines, knowing he has to leave but now you've started bobbing your head as you stroke the base of him. 
"Don't go then," you say around his cock. "Need you here."
You’re so fucking good at this. Your mouth and tongue are making him dizzy with need. 
"Okay baby," Frankie relents, hips rocking towards you. "Just can't fuck you with my cock."
You smile nodding and when he comes down your throat moments later you swallow deeply and grin up at him. 
"Let's lay in bed for a bit," you say, finger curling into the neck of his t-shirt and tugging him to the bed. He follows after you like a puppy, no hesitation in him whatsoever. He’s so fucking easy sometimes.
You’ve set up a mirror against the wall across from your bed. Frankie notices this when he crawls onto the bed next to you. It makes him wonder if you’d planned to bring your date back here tonight to fuck in front of it. The thought flames his insides with a roaring jealousy.
You tell him to strip and you lean back against your headboard. That's when you decide you want him to lay back against you like before, nestled between your legs. You tell him to make himself come for you. 
He does twice. 
It's a while of this before you decide you need a water break. 
"If I leave now I can still make dessert," Frankie tells you tired and panting and covered in his own spend.  
"I'm not done playing," you say pouting and stroking your hand through his curls. His baseball hat lies on the floor beside your bed, forgotten between rounds. 
"I'm already two hours late," Frankie insists. You give his hair a tug and he groans in pleasure. "My wife-"
"Isn't here," you tell him as you position yourself to sitting over his lap. Frankie lets you maneuver his wrists above his head, looking up at you with glazed dark brown eyes. 
"You really wanna leave, Daddy?"
"I need to baby," Frankie says groaning gently as your hips roll over his. "I've been here for hours."
 "Who do you really want to be with tonight?"
"You," Frankie says it without even thinking. It comes rushing out like a released breath of much needed air. 
You smile victorious. You pull your dress up over your head, leaving you naked save for your panties. Frankie groans aloud at the sight of your exposed body, hands twitching at his sides. 
"Daddy I don't think you want to leave," you tell him as you slowly twist until you're on his lap facing away from him. 
"I don't," Frankie echoes, feeling his hardening cock balanced against the outside of your panties. He can feel the damp heat between your legs and he groans. His hands fly to your waist, squeezing gently.
"No" you tell him, hips rolling over him. "You don't. You wanna keep laying there feeling my pussy."
Frankie is transfixed by the way you're arching for him. His eyes go to the mirror on the opposite wall, watching your bare tits bouncing as you undulate against him. 
"I-I can’t fuck you, baby."
"I'll keep my panties on," you tell him in a hush as you glance over your shoulder at him. "Then its okay, I promise." 
You shuffle backwards, ass dragging over the head of his stiffened cock. Frankie moans as you start to roll your hips. He can feel your sweet wet cunt under the fabric. 
"Shouldn't be doing this," Frankie murmurs even as he thrusts up lightly between your ass cheeks, his cock rubbing harshly against the lace of your panties.
"But you are," you tell him, your voice breathy. "And you're not gonna stop are you?"
Frankie watches his cock slide between your clothed ass cheeks, looking debauched but delicious.
"She's waiting for me."
"You're already late," you groan as his cock moves against the panties giving delicious friction. A bright red slash of lace against his rigid cock. "No point."
Frankie's cock throbs as you moan, your ass swirling against it. He grabs handfuls of your ass in his broad hands, gripping it and marveling at how enticing it looks in his palms. He gives your left cheek a swift snap, drawing a quaking groan from you. 
"You're so fucking hot," Frankie grunts. "Lemme go under babygirl."
"Said you couldn't fuck me, remember?"
"Just a little, just to feel you. Won't go all the way in," Frankie pleads. "Daddy needs it."
You look at him over your shoulder, eyes half lidded in desire. Frankie feels like his body is on fire. 
"Just a little under," you tell him, arching, bouncing your ass on his hips. "Not too much." 
"Thank you, thank you," Frankie pants, as he tugs your panties to the side.
You give a needy whimper just as your phone begins to ring. Frankie is distracted as you lean over to grab it from your side table. You look at the number and give a little giggle. 
"Better keep quiet, Daddy," you tease just as you hit the speakerphone button and Frankie looks up. 
“What’re-”
"Hi Mrs. Morales," you say cheerfully, watching Frankie's eyes go wide from over your shoulder and he loses his hold on your panties. He goes to pull back but your ass drops, pressing his cock against your clothed pussy. 
"Hi," Carmen says and Frankie can hear the sound of the restaurant in the background. "Is now a good time?"
Frankie shakes his head no but you just drag your pussy over the head of his cock slowly, the head catching the edge of the panties and allowing him to graze a sliver of your bare cunt. Frankie holds in a groan of pleasure at the sensation. He's never been this close to it. 
"Yeah now's a great time."
"I know you're sitting for us on Saturday but I wanted to know if you're free on Wednesday as well?" Carmen asks. "I'm trying hot yoga that night, it's just from seven to eight but I figure I'll go out for drinks with the girls after."
You make a humming noise as you listen. Frankie keeps his hands on your ass, trying not to thrust but finding it impossible when he can feel how wet you are. You grip him, holding him in place as you slide the seam of your cunt along his cock. He watches your ass bounce against him, looking so good. 
"Mr. Morales isn't around?" You say, keeping your voice even as you start to rub your clothed pussy over Frankie's cock more aggressively. He tries to pull back, tries to stop himself but then Frankie feels you tug your panties to the side and now his head hits the wet slit of your cunt. 
Heaven.
He tilts back into the pillow as he slides along it, you shifting just enough to make sure he can't enter you. Carmen is a distant memory, his cock absolutely throbbing as you glide along him. 
"Frankie?" Carmen scoffs. "I can't count on him for anything. Plus Wednesday nights he's usually with the guys playing pool. So are you free?"
Frankie watches you get a look in your eyes, a sometimes mischievous look that makes his stomach tighten in anticipation. You circle the head of his cock with your pussy, grazing but not letting him inside. 
"Yeah, I'm free. I'll see you Wednesday at seven."
"Thanks so much. Have a good night."
"Have a nice night Mrs. Morales."
That's enough," you tell him breathlessly after you end the call. Frankie whines as you tug his cock out from inside your panties 
"Daddy needs to fuck you," Frankie whimpers, no longer thinking of the consequences. He lets out a shuddering moan when you pull yourself off his lap. 
"Can't fuck me," you tell him with a smile before you glance at the mirror facing your bed. He sees the small curl of your lips. "Lean back a little bit, Daddy. Babygirl will take care of you."
Frankie lays flat on his back eagerly. His large cock is wet and rosy at the tip, aching for your touch. His head is propped slightly on the pillow, allowing him to see into the mirror as you smile at him.
You give him a wink before shuffling backwards on your knees until you're seated on his lower belly. Frankie watches this, his large eyes wide in anticipation. He's confused when you lean back atop of him, your head nestling just under his chin. 
Your ass is pressed into his hips, your legs on either side of his narrow hips. Your thighs hold Frankie's cock between them. You search for Frankie's eyes in the mirror. 
"Can you see, Daddy?"
Frankie takes a shuddering breath. "Yeah."
"You don't get to come inside," your whisper, hand coming to gently pat Frankie's cheek above you. "But you can make yourself come between my legs." 
Frankie feels his cock twitch violently at this. 
"C'mon Daddy," you say arching against his chest. "Want you to come on my pussy."
Frankie begins to thrust his cock up between your thighs, his breathing sharp in your ear. He holds your waist, hips canting up as he watches in the mirror. 
"Spread your legs for me," Frankie groans into your ear. "Daddy wants to see"
You do as he asks, legs spreading. Frankie isn't satisfied, his large hands go to grip your thighs, parting them further as he fucks between your pussy lips, your panties the only barrier. 
"Oh fuck yeah," Frankie groans as he watches your soaked panties rasp against his weeping cock. 
You feel a tingle race through your body at the sensation. The head keeps rubbing against your clit with every swipe. It makes you cry out his name, hips rutting into the air. He sees your tits bouncing with every thrust he gives you and it makes his cock throb.
"That's my fucking girl," Frankie says with a purr. "So fucking wet."
You feel Frankie fumbling with the fabric of your underwear and you know exactly what he's after when the head of his cock slips underneath. 
"Should stop," you slur, eyes barely open, arms loosely at your sides. "S'bad, Daddy."
Despite your feeble chastising, you make no attempt to stop Frankie as he slides the side of his cock between the lips of your pussy. 
"Just a little baby," Frankie pants. "Won't go inside but I gotta feel your pussy." 
"Daddy," you whine. 
"Gonna come in your panties," Frankie tells you, watching his cock jumping beneath the fabric. 
"No, I wanna see it," you murmur. "Wanna watch you come."
Frankie gives a small grunt before pulling at your panties. You help him shift them down your legs and then he's back pumping between your thighs. 
"That's right," Frankie says, pulling your thighs apart himself so he can watch the lurid view of him fucking between the seam of your pussy. "Daddy gets to come on this sweet cunt tonight doesn't he?"
You feel the bulbous head of his cock nudging at your entrance, begging to be welcomed into your wet heat. You want to, you really do. But you’re not doing it now, not in a rush without thinking about it. You know Frankie would let the guilt eat him alive.
"Daddy you're getting too close," you say, feeling the head start to breach your cunt. His hands are on your breasts, kneading them, fingertips teasing the nipples into painful strains. It’s overwhelming and so fucking hot to you. To know that you can’t fuck but that you’re dangerously close to doing so.
"I don't care," Frankie tells you, his forehead shining with sweat as he fucks between your thighs. "You're mine tonight."
"No," you say, twisting so he can't enter you. "Daddy, don't be bad."
Frankie wants to fuck right into you but he holds back at your protestation. Instead he fucks between your thighs with gusto, gasping against your temple as he comes. 
You watch the lurid spray of come shoot up, dribbling over your bare pussy in warm ropes. Frankie watches it too, eyes wide with desire. He holds your legs open, watching your mixed arousal drip down your pussy over the bed sheet below. He's never seen anything sexier in his entire life. 
“That was so fucking good,” he breathes, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “So good baby. But I should go.”
“I think you’re a bit too late for that,” you giggle.
He looks at your face in the reflection, cheeks flushed and eyes glittering. His eyes shift to the clock on the wall that reads the late hour. He’s missed the entire dinner with Carmen and her friends. That’s when Frankie realizes the power you hold over him.
That’s when he realizes he's totally fucked. 
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sciderman · 29 days
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I also tried to find that Peter neurodivergent post recently and yup, vanished. But anyway, I just read your post and tags responding to that other person's ask saying they can't find it. I really really don't think you sound stupid (not that I'm a professional either).
That post hit deep for me because as someone very new to getting therapy, it reminded me of my first session (in which I said, do I have audhd or what?). My therapist told me first thing "there's a lot of overlap between these traits you're listing and trauma". I kinda sat back like 🧍she said what's more important is making sure I'm functioning, coping... That not everything needs a label unless I really want one. I went home and asked my housemate (who's currently doing their psychology masters) and she said, "yeah, both often get misdiagnosed for the other".
That kinda changed my whole perspective on everything and so reading your post brought me back to that. Hoo, emotional and stuff,,
Enough rambling though, my points are:
• Thank you for saying that, it meant a lot (I'm kinda crying haha)
• You're right about it all to my knowledge!
• I hope everything's okay with you and you're happy with what stuff will mean for you ❤️ good luck and all that!
(sorry for the essay)
bless you anon!! i'm really proud of you for taking the steps into therapy, and i really hope that it's a helpful experience in getting to understand yourself better! wishing you so, so much luck on your journey, anon!
i definitely think labels aren't for everyone - and sometimes, sometimes they can be a stifling thing. it's a fantastic thing when you need to simplify something to explain to someone else - especially fantastic when you need someone else to make considerations for you. i find i only really use labels when i need someone else to understand something about me in a simple sort of a way. so i say "bisexual" when i need to explain myself quickly, but it's a shorthand, and there's probably a much more complicated label that might fit me better - pan, maybe, but who has time or courage to explain pan to a 50-something-white-guy - certainly not i, so - for ease of understanding, i'll put myself in that box.
i think labels are fantastic when they make your life simpler - but sometimes they can do the adverse when you realise they don't fit as well as you'd thought. when you need a label to fit, and you feel that pressure to fit into it when - actually, actually, you are more complicated than that. then - then, you might realise, the label isn't for you, and you can either hunt down another or - be easy with the fact that you're a unique beast, and not everything will fit all the time. there's overlap, and every brain case is so so unerringly unique to the person.
it's like lgbt+ labels, lord knows, the kids are inventing a new one every week because there's no way to encompass everyone's unique approach to attraction. we can say "this is me, and you might feel similar" and that helps - but truly, no human is 1:1. no experience is 1:1. one of you watched cats (2019) and it irreparably altered your viewpoint on the world once you saw fuzzy idris elba dance on the screen. one of you (mercifully) didn't, and didn't sustain that trauma. you're different.
i hope any explanations you get help you move forwards, anon! but i hope you're also comfortable in the knowledge that there ain't no thing like you, 'cept you! (and i love you)
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bladesmitten · 4 months
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(anon about Wyll getting hells-tormented and transformed in front of everyone) I'm just going insane about him and think I misremembered his first dialogue after the scene a little dkjsk (got mixed up with another backstory line perhaps? about how he doesn't regret the pact and would do it again? or another one maybe it's been a minute since I played :((( ) BUT STILL
just!!! Mizora keeps dishing out torments and he keeps taking it and keeping up his brave heroic face!! and he keeps trying to be as good as possible no matter the sacrifice and augh my heart HE WAS WILLING TO GET KILLED!!!!
and everyone in camp just watching that happen like.. that's Quite A Moment for him to go through right in front of a bunch of people he's only known for (usually) a handful of days at most? and Karlach is right there realizing he was 100% willing to get killed by his patron for her to live! and everyone else in camp is also witnessing all of this!
it's kind of an insane thing to meet a guy and go "oh he's cool and hot and has the tadpole he can come with :)" and then find out the "devil" he's hunting is actually another tadpole buddy and then shortly after that you watch his patron torture and transform him in the middle of your camp and he gets back up and keeps going!! and you're standing there like,,,,, your man just got marinated in all the hells at once,,
and you can talk to him afterwards and reassure him and all but listen. listen.. I just think people who talk about Karlach or a tiefling Tav (or the grove tieflings? do they talk about the grove tieflings?) helping him out with horn care are onto something I think he could use a little more... is the word 'aftercare'? just wouldn't his skin and muscles hurt after all that... what if he needs a little massage :( a gentle head rub :( he needs to go to a spa in Baldur's Gate (and it goes without saying that he (and every one of the tadfools yes but this ain't about them) could use a good therapist)
(technically Mizora was "within her rights" to give him whatever punishment wherever she felt like it but she should also consider dying a thousand deaths and letting him have nice things and leaving him alone forever) (I'm taking him away from her and holding his hands tenderly and– ahem)
...hmm that was more words than I meant to,, I was trying to be hinged and levelheaded in the first ask but then I thought about him more and that just... it happens when you've known him for a couple of DAYS... idk thinking about it made me go feral a little. hope you have a good one I love seeing you on the dash btw <3
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no i get it LMFAO wyll's rotating around in my head 24/7 like a perpetual microwave
it really is kinda crazy to think about all that happening, esp if you also recruit karlach on the same day you meet him 😭 you've known him for less than 24 hours at that point and he just up and makes a huge sacrifice in the name of doing the right thing. just another tuesday for the blade methinks! (also, obsessed with the wording on that - "marinated in the hells" 😭)
honestly, no wonder wyll sulks at the beach during the tiefling party. he has had no time to process everything that's happened - from hunting karlach in avernus, to getting tadpoled, the nautiloid crashing, saving the druid grove from goblins, helping the tiefling refugees, sparing the person you swore to kill, getting transformed into a devil, infiltrating the goblin camp, killing the three goblin leaders, rescuing halsin only to find out they have to go to moonrise towers anyway. all in - what? a week or two? not to mention he has a mindflayer parasite, the threat of mindflayer transformation looming over everyone in camp.
so the one time the party finally has time for rest and relaxation and celebration - that's the time it all hits wyll. he's permanently changed. because he did the right thing. he can't bring himself to celebrate despite all the good he's done. will the people still trust him to protect them? or will they only see a devil?
and AAGGHHH there really should've been more [tiefling] dialogue for wyll... comforting him... giving him advice on horn care... or even as a flirt option to just offer to take care of it for him. yknow. he deserves it and more!!
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Greetings, I was referred to try these matchups by a friend of mine who had roped the rest of our house into their shenanigans so here I am: 1. Currently, it's Whose Honey Are You by Fats Waller, particularly:
"Please tell me, Have you really made your mind up Who it's gonna be? Don't you think, before we wind up, We're terrific, you and me!" it reminds me of an old club I met my spouse in and it's been coming back to my mind recently. 2. My enneagram type is Type Eight, the challenger. 3. Not truly, I enjoy documentaries but those kinds of videos ain't my cup of tea. I'm more inclined towards music. 4. I did not have an imaginary childhood friend, not that one I can remember anyways, it's been some time since I was a child. 5. Typically I don't sleep as much but I do like to do so after reading for a bit. 6. I would change it to Leopold. I don't have much of reason, I just like the name 7. I happen to like Aaron's "Your Tsundere Boss Boyfriend wants to talk" audio, it feels real in a sense and shows a lot of maturity in handling a relationship that I appreciate seeing. 8. I don't seem to get the appeal behind David Shaw, he just seems too much like a tough head and needs to get his ass beat 9. Despite their quality, I do like the Hallmark drama movies, not because I enjoy them but they're just fun to mock as I watch them. One that I know is "Til Death Do Us Part: An Aurora Teagarden Mystery" on account of how much a friend of mine watched it while I was around. 10. I do like Aaron, he's has a good head on his shoulders, I can see myself having a good talking with him over dinner. 11. I usually talk about history when I ramble, I've learned enough where I can speak on it and if I'm caught in a mood then I would be caught rambling for too long 12. I don't much indulge in that kinda food, I'm more inclined to a home-cooked meal. Something like Jambalaya would do well for me. 13. My favorite playlist would have to be one my spouse set up for me with my favorite Jazz musicians in there, I listen to it here and there. 14. I suppose the answer to this would be the same to number eight, which is hallmark movies. 15. Something else that I feel could help you to know about me is that...I like having people in my life, I don't act like it much but I do appreciate them all. I also play the Cello and I run my own shop for charms and occult items.
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Hmmm… actually, let’s be real. That “hmmm…” is not real, because it’s so obvious who your match would be. How could I pair you with anyone but Camelopardalis?
Like, you like to talk about history? Awesome, Cam was there for the history (because I will believe he’s old as hell until god tells me otherwise.) You like maturity, honesty, and transparency in your relationships? Cam’s literally a therapist; I would hope he’s got all those on lock. I think your personalities and your lifestyles would be instantly compatible, and you two would connect queerplatonically or romantically with ease.
Oh, and what an easy, lovely life it would be, Cam being a perfect fit in your household. He’d get along so well with your spouse, as he strikes me as an amicable person to get along with. He loves jazz and the sound of your cello; perhaps you two even play together. (I could see Camelopardalis having picked up the piano in all of his years.) He’s an avid reader with a huge collection, so he frequently shares with you, giving you good recommendations for things to read before bed. He loves to loiter around the shop and watch you work, maybe watching the till while you’re in the back or knitting behind the counter on slower days. (Really, the only point of disagreement I could think of is that he genuinely, unironically loves Hallmark movies.)
Song:
Like a song of love that clings to me/ How the thought of you does things to me/ Never before has someone been more/ Unforgettable/ In every way/ And forevermore/ That's how you'll stay
One, it’s a jazz love song classic- the jazz love song classic, if you will. It’s also sweet, singable, and a little somber, perfect for slow dancing in the shop while the rain keeps the customers and bad things away. Two. I couldn’t resist, given Cam’s job in memory modification; it was too punny.
Runner-ups:
Hmm, so James was a pretty compelling option for you. I like his vibes as a match, but he strikes me as more of a platonic, social companion than a romantic one. Vega is a runner-up, because imagining him in your occult shop is really funny and charming. Like, that’s a sitcom right there.
note: @mr-laveau come get yo juice
Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌
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tortillasconsal · 1 year
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Headcanons for Splendorman that I didn't get to put in my last post bc I didn't know where
Here we go:
He has a whispy voice with a slightly high pitch that softens when talking with children, but he easily turns low and direct when he's tired or upset.
He has a pretty theatrical talk, as if he's making a whole circus performance, though he usually sounds very disconnected from the people he's engaging with, as if he's daydreaming or in his own world.
Voice headcanons: Johnny Deph's Willy Wonka and Mad Hatter, and Tim Curry's lower pitch when tired/upset.
Splendor is probably the only faceless person who might be interested in having a relationship.
And I mean might because he doesn't really yearn for one, he's just open to the idea. But so far no one has caught his attention, there ain't many creatures who make the cut for a century-old cryptid's love interest anyway.
Even though he acts very upbeat and happy he's usually very tired when he's done for the day (which is almost never), taking care of many children and acting as a therapist for many people is draining, especially when you have none to talk to or hang out with.
He actually has a lot of pressure bc he feels like he needs to put on a happy face and a good performance for the sake of the people. He doesn't trust anyone else to do what he does or help him so he forces himself to bear that baggage alone. And since he doesn't have anyone for him and refuses to be vulnerable with his family he usually ignores those feelings or hides away.
Despite his fame of being the most emotional it is very rare to catch him crying.
It is unkown where he got his anger issues from. They know that he started showing symptoms since young, but nobody knows why.
Maybe is because he usually bottles up his emotions, maybe it's all the resentment he holds, maybe he got them from one of his parents or maybe they're the results of how he was raised.
His family speculates its the Faceless' "true nature" he's been holding back all this time, like a bomb. Which is not true.
They believe they are naturally evil beings, but that's because they've spent all their lives consuming toxic emotions and getting consumed by them they just think that's how it is.
I really get a lot of Will Wood vibes from him. Like as a fun guy that may or may not be a little messed up who has a level of deph and feelings he's not sure how to adress so he may look like he's deliring sometimes or he's speaking from the heart but not making sense other times.
His song? Dr. Sunshine by Will Wood
I mean, its even in the name.
He has complicated feelings about the proxies and the residents of Slenderman's mansion. On one hand he feels for them and wishes he could get them out of his brother's grip, on the other he knows they're bad people –maybe as bad as his family– and doesn't think they deserve another chance.
But in any way he doesn't trust any of them near the kids he takes care of.
Same with his brother. He loves Slenderman so much, but its really hard to see his little brother torturing people for whatever reason and acting very condescending towards him. He's still able to put his foot down when necesary, though it always comes back to zero.
Splendorman does not like Laughing Jack. Like- at all. They both constanty brawl over the children and Jack sometimes manages to sneak in Splendor's domain which angers him even more because nobody's supposed to do that.
Now. Laughing Jack is not a resident at Slenderman's mansion, he's mostly on his own. But Jack hangs out with Slenderman and his proxies a lot to have some protection from him. Slenderman is aware of that and he plays along to annoy Splendorman even more.
This just makes the relationship between the brothers ever more tense.
Faceless people understand and speak every human languaje. However, only Splendorman has bothered to learn sign languages, the faceless people usually talk through telepathy but he understands how this might be pretty upsetting to deaf people.
Slendorman is not a fan of technology. He just never could get a hold of it. He's an old man.
He's not a big fan of alcohol. Even though faceless people can't get drunk. He just doesn't like the strong flavor it has, but if he had to choose he would go for wine or any fruit-flavored licor or mezcal.
He owns a lot of walking sticks, he likes them a lot.
One time a kid told him that he looked like their grandfather and he stopped using them for a while.
He knows how to play various instruments, and although he isn't a singer himself he likes to make up songs for the kids sometimes.
He's also a good dancer and is a really big fan of Swing.
This is all I got 🧍‍♂️
I wanted to write more headcanons but I figured that might need a little bit more context of the lore I'm building for the Slenderbros. So I'll start working on a blog where I'll dive into all the mythos I got for them, but first I want to make some other blogs dedicated to Slenderman and Trenderman first to be a little bit organized.
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sydsaint · 10 months
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My quick overview of Money in the Bank! Overall, it was a pretty good show. 7/10⭐
‼️MITB 2023 SPOILERS AHEAD‼️
So happy that Iyo won the women's match. Love her 💜 Zoey was my sleeper pick to 2 win but I don't quite think she's ready yet. Trish is making her better every week tho. Iyo and Bayley are gonna have some drama now. I know it! The handcuff spot ending was great! I loved the creativity. Zelina showed out with that Code Red from the top of the ladder. And all the ladies where serving this their gear. As they should.
Gunther kicked Riddles ass, as he should. The match was good and Gunther looked great as always. Drew coming back was the highlight of that segment. He and Gunther are gonna kick the crap out of one another soon. And I honestly see Drew as the one to dethrone Gunther. Perhaps with some help from The Brawling Brutes again since Vinci and Kaiser are still a factor.
Surprise ! John Cena showed up and hinted that Mania may be in London in the future. My Aussie husband Grayson showed up and he and Cena had a good promo battle. Possible Cena/Grayson match in the future?? Because I'd love to see that when Grayson's leg is good to go. Grayson had a killer shirt on as always. That's one more to add to my wardrobe when I've got money.
Finn and Seth put on a banger match. Kinda wished it was Demon! Finn tho. Judgment Day is so clearly gonna break up soon and I am all for it. Finn needs to be free of the shit Rhea and Dom have going on. So does Damian. Personally, I think that Finn should start tagging with JD McDonagh and Damian should get a singles run.
Not a huge Cody fan but he kicked Dom's annoying ass so yay Cody! The match was okay. I've always found Cody kinda eh. And Dom's character with Rhea is just annoying.
Didn't really care for the tag match until Shayna pulled a GOATED move and smacked Rhonda up. Hopefully this either means Rhonda is gonna be gone for a while or Shayna is gonna give her the work in a full match/fued. Also, I'm happy for Liv getting the belt back. Don't really care for Raquel 🫠
Bloodline Civil War was a great match! Jimmy and Jey both showed out and proved that Roman is slowly becoming irrelevant. Loved seeing my man Solo kick ass! (even if it was his bro's ass😭) That's my man and I can't wait for him to drop Roman and get back on the same page with his bros. Romans's time on top is coming to an end and I can't wait for him to drop the belts. I'm a shield stan for life. But that man has become so bland both with his promos and his in-ring work. It's time for someone else to have the belt and be on top. I 100% think that Jey should be the one to dethrone him. Poetic Justice if you will.
The men's ladder match was 🔥🔥🔥. Shoutout to my man Ricochet for putting Logan through that table with that amazing spot. Shinsuke and Butch both looked really solid in the match. Hopefully, they'll let Shin get more screen time. (also let Pat come back. I miss him jamming out to Shin's music) Logan was okay in the match. His ring work is getting better. He works well as a heel and I loved the boys all ganging up on him. (not a Logan hater. Just thought it was funny) Damian did solid work. He was my sleeper pick and I didn't mind him winning. Though my husband LA Knight should HAVE WON THE MATCH!! Triple H will be hearing from my therapist. Papa Trip hinted after the show that Knight is gonna get a push soon because of all the attention he's getting. I can see him going after Austin's US championship since Theory's run is dry as hell and it's about time he dropped the belt.
Extra random thoughts.
Wade Barrett looked fine as fuck in that pink blazer. I'm obsessed and in love 😍
The Sami and Kevin segment was great. Love my chaotic BFFs
Rhea needs to drop the title already. Cuz girl ain't doing shit with the locker room.
Asuka V Iyo outta be 🔥🔥
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tigre-edi-rawr · 7 months
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October 2023: Life Update
[Lifestyle] All I do is work, eat and sleep. If I have extra time to spend, that would go into cleaning the house a little or watching series until I fall asleep. I don't have the privilege now to eat good food everyday, I remember eating instant noodles and canned goods every single day (still experiencing now). I would eat fast food once as a reward, then go back to eating instant noodles and canned goods because that's what's convenient and what I can afford until the next payroll. Sometimes, I don't even want to eat, it's like I'm not longing for it, I could just drink water and be hungry until I feel weak and falls asleep. I sleep in an old sofa foam placed in a cold floor, every day my back hurts, I feel chilly and uncomfortable. I think my body is just not used to not having comfortable things in her life. My parents really spoiled me in life, gave me things so my everyday life was comfortable.
But I think, my state is now improving, I am financially being okay. Hopefully, I can afford a new comfortable bed with many pillows and a soft blanket. And a refrigerator, so I could stock food and just grab then cook. I could eat well! If I eat well that means I'm taking good care of myself, right?
[Relationship] Hmmmmm. Having difficulties with this one right here. I used to laugh when people say "Saka mo lang makikilala ang isang tao kapag kasama mo na talaga sa bahay." Don't get me wrong, I believed it when I was younger but never thought this is so fucked up when you're actually in the situation. And it really hits now. It's fucking real. Tbh, wouldn't dare to say I'm all healthy and fun to be with but right now.... The realest I could say is that this is not what I hoped for, not what I longed for, not what I dreamed of. I don't want someone to change so that we could work, I learned that "Kung hindi kayo swak, hindi kayo swak." even if that special someone change, it's not the same when someone really fits in your life, it would not feel like everything is working and acceptable. I just want everything to be easy, like how puzzle pieces fit in a board. My life is too much right now, to be stressed in my love life too. I don't have the capacity to cater the misery. I just want peace of mind, home, comfort, someone who will love me the way how I wanted to be loved, my all-or-nothing, my ride-or-die, the yin in my yang. Life is a fucking roller coaster itself, why want a relationship like one also?
I would love to have someone who I don't have to struggle translating myself with, I want someone who really knows me, the things I want, I need and deserve. I don't want to be the "guy" in the relationship. I want to be the baby. I'm busy trying my best to be mature in life but in relationship, I want to be the immature one, the one who always need to be cuddled and showered with love because someone thinks that's what I deserve. Someone who will be afraid to make me feel tired, hungry, or give me something to overthink about, because that someone already know I have too much burden to add more up. Someone who will make every thing he can possibly make lighter to help me lift this heavy life. I want someone who reads my soul. I want a man, someone who will take care of me. Not someone I should mold so that I could have the man I wished for. For once, I wish to have a man that is already molded, what I wished for. I'm no therapist, not a place to teach boys how to act and love. I'm so done with this bullshit. For once, I want to be the one who will be told how to act, be mature and be healthy in a relationship. To fix me... fuck, if someone could do that, hands down to that man already. This bitch ain't easy.
[Work] I am always proud of myself for not being dumb, you know? I learn fast, my intellectual capacity is something I boast off. I really like talking to intelligent people because it felt like the vibe is reciprocated, you know. Like for real, not to be a jerk. Worth my fucking time. But anyways, at work, I'm still an idiot. Don't mind me boasting since I am bobo right now, still learning and a beginner. But so far, by the comments given to me, I feel like I am exceling and coping good enough. I hope I will end this year at work with my sane self.
Enough na sana with workmates na Jollibee huhu, I can't even. Especially those who work too much to be recognized and takes credit then you will look like a tae lang na nakastay lang kasi walang dulot. Intellectual property is a critical issue. I'd rather work alone than work with toxic and unprofessional people, my patience can't even.
[Mental Health] This bitch is always on a mood swing. The instant change of physical/mental strength, mood, personality, walang makasabay sa agos ng utak ko pota. Anyway, my PCOS is the biggest contributor of this dilemma, couldn't choose to be nice for the better or to be fucking real and act/speak as I would please. The emotion burst, the instant cravings, the bloating, the constant "walang gana" phase. Tapon ko na sarili ko? Not very helpful for someone who is also a perfectionist, ga-hibla na nga lang pasensya ko, mas numinipis kapag wala ako sa mood tapos tanga yung kausap ko.
But I must say, I am at my most peaceful self right now that I am away from all noise. Mostly, I am alone, so I could only hear myself, which is sometimes also irritating but yeah, things are a lot better for my mental health. I can always blame myself only for all the hardships I'm having, the biggest relief. I am responsible for everything that is happening around me and inside me. A little easy to digest and solve since it's easier to forgive myself than other people if they destroyed or hurt me :)
I have a lot more to say, but I'm exhausted already. Bye.
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sparrowhero · 1 year
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Wait. Can you please explain on the post more about breakups bc I feel like Keigo does cave as send a "i miss you" text only to get hit with "okay and i miss half of my favourite groups that disbanded this year you ain't special 😒" two days later. Dabi nearly caves but gets a txt and it really boiled down to "my therapist says you need to see a therapist and find better positive impacts in life, you are 👌closed to living like you exist in an rnb music video" and he's left staring at the screen since this is the only text he's gotten in three months Shigaraki looks like he only plays Genshin Impact and buys body pillows I don't think he has any real hope in life...
Keigo definitely caves because while he is pretty much invulnerable as the Winged Hero, Hawks, he is softer than a marshmallow as Keigo Takami. He's going to try to kill you with kindness even if that last text hit him so bad his soul nearly left his body. Being as real as possible he is probably the reason you broke up, be it because he's too secretive or he did the Noble Thing (coward) and broke up with you to protect you so he knows that he's got to take a bit of a ribbing. You're killing him a little bit with that but he's kind of just glad you're answering back and don't have him blocked. He knows intuitively he's gotta take a bit of a ribbing if he even has half a chance to get back on your good side. Once he knows what he wants and is truly willing to work for it, he's a golden boy, but prior to that it's kind of easy to be on and off with him LOL. He thinks too goddamn much for his own good, really.
Dabi, on the other hand, is like "...okay." because that has definitely killed any motivation to come and see you because that shit hurted and genuinely offended him. He is definitely going to say some out of pocket mean shit back that is probably true but that shouldn't be said in the manner he delivers that text back. Turn off your phone if you don't want to cry. He's available so long as the break up is amicable, but he's not crawling back to ANYBODY no matter how much it hurts. He's got a lot more pride than Hawks when it comes to interpersonal relationships like this. If he can cut off a mfer he tried to kill out of jealousy as a TODDLER he can cut off ANYBODY but he MIGHT reconsider if you are appropriately contrite if you want to see him again. Unfortunately he's also not above making everyone know he's your ex and all that entails just in case you wanted to get cute and switch sides to the heroes or smth like that. You can BOTH lose. Dabi's toxic trait is that he loves to get even.
BE NICE TO SHIGARAKIIIIII. S1 Shigaraki does in fact have a shit ton of figures and stuff but I truly don't see him as a 2D wife/husband/spouse guy bc he inherently hates things that are pandering. He has no gatcha fave. He's more of a collector and video game completionist (he has a Nintendo 64 in one manga panel so you know he's one of Those Guys) than a '3D people are worthless' kind of shut-in. Definitely the majority of the effort has to be made by you in the beginning but he is not unsalvageable he was just brainwashed by Evil Grandpas who encouraged selfish behavior. If you come back and are like "I'm sorry about how that happened but you need to respect my boundaries" or smth like that and he'll be like ".....Fine." and actually take it to heart. His friendship with Spinner I think is a good example of that and he's probably the one who helps you guys out the most should you get back together. Everyone clap for spinner right now.
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inkofamethyst · 9 months
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August 3, 2023
Now that I will be attending a school without regular free performing arts events from what I can tell (crying, screaming, throwing up), I'm going to need to budget for seeing performances. I can't just waltz into a free opera now because the tickets cost like seventy dollars, even through my uni's ""subsidized"" ticket page (wait I just checked the official venue website and they offer much cheaper student tickets lol). My mom gave me a budget template that I'm going to try to use for the next few months. I'm considering eventually coding a version of it in Notion, but that might make it harder to have a backup if I ever decide to drop Notion.
hhhhhhh I mean at least I'll get Adobe for free for a few more years (I am not good at using Adobe and find the learning curve incredibly steep but I do like getting expensive things for free).
Not to sound like a millennial, but adulting does suck. Like actually. For example. I love the idea of insurance. Finding an insurance provider though sounds like the most boring thing ever. And that's not even the worst of it. I have to find a primary care provider. And potentially a therapist. And (good) therapy ain't cheap. I liked it when I was cosplaying as an adult right down the road from home.
I went to see Barbie today!!!! I really enjoyed it :D It was super goofy, super silly, and then it did get rather serious and heartfelt. I also wore the peachy-pink dress I had nearly finished a few months ago (adding ties in the back to make the waist a wee more fitted was really the main fix), and the first person I spoke to while wearing it told me how cute they thought it was and of course I had to excitedly tell them that I'd finished it that morning. I mean I felt cute beforehand but that put me over the top fr. It's not perfect by any means, but I made it, it's mine, and from far enough away it's really super cute! Definitely a make I'll be taking with me despite the fact that the fabric wrinkles like that's its full time job. So goes rayon, I guess. Anyway it was really fun walking into the theater surrounded by other women and girls who were also wearing pink. As someone who doesn't wear pink ever, it felt weirdly empowering. Maybe because we were united in obnoxious femininity, and that togetherness was strength, of a sort. Well, whatever I was feeling and whyever I was feeling it, I dig it.
Today I'm thankful that my grad school orientation is online lol. Part of me was hoping for an in-person multi-day undergrad-like orientation event, but I suppose I don't really need that. I know, generally, how school works, and this one can't be all that much different. Besides, there's more flexibility this way.
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BUBBLES!! (I know I just sent you an ask and I don’t need to repeat your name but it’s my signature, part of my charm if you may) IM DOING GOOD!! I’ve decided to overwork myself for a uni project (that didn’t require that much work but I’m one hell of a perfectionist especially when there are no reasons to be and yes, I will mention that to my therapist that I don’t have phewww sorry) okay so I just wanted to say that uuuh I have a few headcanons in my head and what about a sneak peek? maybe I could give you several options and you could tell me which one you’d rather read first? Also IF (and it is a big IF) I were to write something and share the google docs link would you be interested in reading it? I really do not want the pressure of having a writing blog, already did in the past and it just becomes very unhealthy for me but I still have the ideas in my mind and it helps me to share, so? It’s really just a hypothetical thing but if you’re interested, I’d love to know!!
Anywayssss:
1) what if Sarah’s mom came back years later?
2) how would Sarah/Ellie handle reader and Joel expecting?
3) Joel’s…scar story and the aftermath of it
4) Joel being touch-starved
5) I know you just wrote a headcanon but I had thoughts about hair (whether you playing with Joel’s hair, vice-versa and some other cute things)
Okay let me know ily <3
- 🪷
Haya, baby! Well we don't like you overworking says the person who knows nothing about self care I hope you are looking after yourself because when I'll send Joel for instruction and the results will be bad... well... I ain't saving ya... But no I get it. It's hard navigating this world when you're a maximalist and a perfectionist.
You are always more than welcome to send in your stories and you know I will always post them. I understand the pressure because even I in the middle of the hardest week am worrying about how I haven't written in a while. So send in whatever you want and feel like writing! Celebrating your talent is my pleasure. I feel honored that you even want to share it with me. 🤍🫧✨
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binch-i-might-be · 2 years
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Waltzes in
I AM DONE WITH MY LAST TWO EXAMS PREP LET'S GO GAYS LET'S GOOOO
it's like 11 pm and I am tired but let's gooo I am so excited
gonna but my On Repeat Spotify playlist okay okay
the first song is literally helpless and Eliza is not having a good time in here I-
lmao, the poor American government dealing with THIS? oh nooo
Neither of them had any desire to wake them, even though it was almost ten AM and all three of the kids rarely ever slept past nine.
And then there is me who could sleep for 12-14 hours uninterrupted through an earthquake. 9am? The fuck?
ah yes hello Eliza...this is normal this is fine
Love how Eliza is like a tiny addition to the Washington family
AYY THIS IS THE SNIPPET YOU POSTED!
Young girls couldn’t be careful enough these days.
If this ain't the most accurate shit I have ever read. Need me some steel-capped boots.
I feel bad for Eliza :(
ah yes...inviting your son's ex who he dumped for a man he was in love with in a previous life for coffee...normal behaviour. very normal.
Jack had always called it his ‘dad voice’, but… he wasn’t so sure that was what it was, not anymore. Not after Alex had snapped to attention every single time he’d used it during the past day.
No, he was beginning to suspect it was more of a ‘military commander voice’ than anything else.
NOW WHY DID THIS MAKE ME ACTUALLY STOP AND STARE I AM SAD
This isn't right...they don't deserve this.
George has their coffee preferences memorized...NEED ME SOMETHING LIKE THAT PLEASE AND THANK YOU
I know nothing about Philip Schuyler is there a particular reason he's struggling so much?
omg yeah...the therapist waiting lists...
People be coming with trauma from 200 years ago I am crying-
“It’s… hard. Getting back to normal will be difficult, but for now, I think it’s enough to hang in there and keep going, right?”
Oh oh, this hit me hard especially after some shit in the past year and ohhh god this.
“You’re right. Maybe we’ll just have to create a new normal.”
Yeah. We'll get there one day. One day.
Oh yeah, the registry and shit. George just be like "So uh I was y'all's first president lmao"
To him, it just sounded like they were fishing for yet another method to prosecute and segregate people.
!!!!! FUCK THE REGISTRY !!!!!! Reminded me too much of how the Cohort had the institute heads register all the downworlders and track them all that shit. (this is from the shadowhunter books)
That power in the wrong hands...fuck I wish they did have a way of proving who is lying and not.
YEAH GEORGE YOU DO YOU LOVE!
Ah yes. They have always been related. Fun right?
JOHN JOHN JOHN LOML JOHN
noo this is breaking me
GOD DO YOU GUYS NOT HAVE SOCIAL MEDIA?? FIND THEM
Being without Alex just left him… empty. Grey. Sunrise wasn’t as beautiful without him by his side, his morning coffee tasted stale on his tongue, his own smile seemed dim to him when he flashed it at himself in the mirror.
oh wow pain wow okay y'know what imma just review literature my heart hurts
OH KID HELLO
Jagger hello!
PROBLEM CHILD AUHISUDHIUIHDVUIHFD
ah yes, major historical moment. noice.
ohhh Jagger is the couple's child who own the cafe.
ANGELICA???? TIS YOU????
LMAO, SHE'S LIKE "fuck the guy" and John's just like "uh..." not knowing the guy is his husband
this is so weird/cool because they are so entangled but they don't know it ahhhhh
aww, he's getting them pastries.
“Pretty homophobic of you to erase my sexuality like that,” he shot back as he set it down.
LMAO I LOVE THEM YOUR HONOUR
JAGGER AND JOHN CONTENT MY BELOVED
you recognize them because you met them 200 years ago :)
YESS HE REMEMBERS THEM!
He wondered if it would feel this odd when he was finally face to face with Alex–because he would find him, without question–but he couldn’t really imagine it. No, finding Alex would be like coming home for the first time, he was sure of it.
My version of the meeting involves a lot of drama and snow and rain. But yes. You will recognize him. I know you will.
JAGGER IS SOMEONE FROM THE 50S AU?? WHOMST??
OF COURSE! JOHN KNOWS HAMILTON WAS WASHINGTON'S SON SO IT MAKES SENSE FOR THEIR REINCARNATED PERSONAS TO KNOW EACH OTHER TOO AND JUST-
AHHHHH
Eliza just met him and oh my god oh my god I am freaking out
John didn’t know why he even asked. He knew everything there was to know about Washington, but… talking about him was almost comforting, in a sense. The man had been more of a father to him back then than Henry Laurens ever had been, and he could admit to himself that he didn’t only miss Alex.
I...Need me some Washingtons with John content please and thank you I miss them.
“Apparently he’s already decided not to get registered and to let the idiots fight over who gets to kin him,”
So sexy of him.
OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD NEED THE GIRLS TO COME BACK PLEASE LEAD JOHN TO ALEX OH MY GOD
I just finished it now I will lie down and think about it for the rest of the night.
LOVED THIS SO FUCKING MUCH YOU HAVE NO IDEA! THIS WAS GREAT YOU'RE GREAT GOOD NIGHT
so you sent this almost a month ago now but ANYWAY LET'S GO ADHJHDKJHAKJD
lmao helpless 😭
yeah <3 they're useless, your honour!
ashfskhdhf they were raised by Gwash, do you truly think he let's those kids sleep past nine am 😭
hiii Eliza :)) completely normal!
you can never have enough steel-capped boots!
yeah she's not having the best time :/
there's a reason it's usually Martha who opens the door okay. George is fucking useless he knows nothing about people he WILL invite his son's very recently broken up with ex in to have coffee!! what is George if not a grown up himbo
AHDKAJDHKJ EXCELLENT THAT WAS THE INTENTION
of course he does!!!! this man lives to make his wife coffee and he's too much of a dad to not immediately memorise Eliza's too <3
oh it's just because Schuyler was also a general! I don't know anything about him either I just thought I would be spicy and give all the soldiers mental illness :]
therapist waiting lists our beloathed! yeah imagine you're just a random guy and some dude comes into your therapy session who has trauma from being like. guillotined in the french revolution 😭
yeahhhh haha unintentional covid parallels go brrr :')
fuck the registry <3333
oh! I didn't read those but we stan the cinematic parallels ;)
mhh they have no way of knowing who's lying except for crossreferencing! you know, finding people who would have known this person and asking them. and hoping these people are. not lying. which they could be!
JOHN HAS ARRIVED!!!
they do have social media, unfortunately it's hard to find someone without knowing their last name :')
yeah haha. pain!
hi Jagger :)) favourite problem child <3
you are the second person who thought this is Angelica but it's Peggy 😭
John is like "uh sure I guess", unaware that he will interpret "fuck that guy" in an entirely different manner!
yes thank you that was why I was so excited about that idea! them being so connected without knowing it :)
JAGGER AND JOHN MY FAVOURITE SURROGATE SIBLING DUO
of course he will recognise Alex <33
AHDGJHD JAGGER IS NO ONE SPECIFIC THEY'RE JUST A LITTLE GUY
yeah!! John's family is the exact same now as they used to be back then, so he has good reason to believe Alex is Washington's son again!
wanting Washington & John content is like searching for water in a desert, it's harrowing and depressing! but I think there will be reincarnation au content with Them :)
they really need to come back I am fucking blue balling myself at this point. just come back and give John Alex's number I am begging you (she said, with no intention to make it happen)
THANK YOU THANK YOU ADKHFKJHAD
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dearyallfrommatt · 8 days
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A hole that's never to be filled.
A friend of mine's dog is dying. He and his husband are having his wiener dog put down later today as his advanced age has made his many infirmities too much to bear. It happens.
I've known this guy on the internet for as long as Waf's been in the picture. We knew each other way back in the days when blogs were the place to be an absolute asshole to people who can't slap you. Liberal politics, but we had a good bit in common. Two weirdos from the worst the rural South had to offer in the '80s.
The way my friend talks, as much as a square peg I was, his was way worse on account of being gay and I can't argue with him. He's pulled a full-on Thomas Wolfe and lives with his husband in the Big Apple. What love I have for my little village's corner of the world I do not push on him nor does he pull.
I wish I had something better to say to him. Otis was probably the last thing that kept me hanging on. He died and I quit writing my news blog, I quit messing around with harmonicas or paying attention to music, and I really quit giving too much of a shit about what previously grabbed my attention.
Namely, politics and video games. Video games became mere background noise like bad movies and Lovecraft pastiches of dubious quality, so that's a story for another time. Once I get my head wrapped around it, I'll get back to you.
As for politics, well, I'm just tired. We've had a microscope on the American Political Machine - including the media, all media, that coves said machine - and I really don't think we've learned a single thing. Not about how the government works or what the media is even supposed to be, nothing. I hate to be almost cliched, but look who's running for president come November and ponder the important issues of the day, and tell me we - as a culture, as a people, as a nation - have learned a goddamn thing.
But so much for all that. The end came and for once in my life, I didn't try to grind it out until it started to work. No one read my news blog except for my brother for news about Mississippi and my ex whenever Facebook reminded her. I never received one response and none of my visitors were able to convince me they weren't digital ephemera.
Maybe losing Otis gave me an excuse. I quit the gym not long after because I wasn't able to make myself go. I quit talking to both my therapist and the pysch doc because I'm tired of talking to people, especially about my general depression and the specific disinclination to hang around longer than necessary. Hell, it was around this time my teeth passed the point of no return. Keep up your orthodontal health, brethren.
The therapist asked me to come up with three reasons to stay in this world and I could only come up with Momma and Otis. The dog, of course, is easy. I took him on a responsibility and never found anyone better to take over the job. As for Momma, well, as rough as her life has been - and rougher than it needed to be for anyone and for no good reason - I figure she didn't need to spend her declining years wondering why her eldest son and favored child couldn't stay in this life anymore and what she did to cause it. It ain't her fault, but you know how mommas are.
But that's all I've got. It's recently occurred to me that my lifelong restlessness - always stymied by my fathomless laziness - is because I've never really had any ambition or goals or, really, dreams. The whole writing thing is partly ego and mostly because it's the first thing I ever did that someone told me, "Damn, Matt, that's really good." Otherwise, man, I just like to read and thought it'd be an easy gig.
Called that one wrong. Pay attention to your Uncle Matt, kids. Always remember that no matter what you do, the bills have to be paid and they never stop. Just something to consider.
But these days? It occurred to me that I have the perfect set-up. Someone's paying my bills and I am finally free to do... what? If there was something I wanted to do, I'd be doing it. If there was somewhere I wanted to be, I'd be there. If there was someone I wanted to be with, I'd be with them.
There isn't. There aren't any stories I want to tell, either, and since there's nowhere I want to go and no one I want to talk to - and I don't want to talk to anyone about anything anyway - I'm not getting any stories to tell. I really should sit Momma down and make her tell me the History of Peaceful Valley (According to Mr. & Mrs. C. B---). If nothing else, it'd be colorful and with her, it's gone forever.
But I just don't care. I don't care what I eat for supper tonight. The next book, the next game, the next movie, the next documentary, the next bowl, it's all static to drown out the dark voices in my head. I don't care what my brother does with the current jigsaw puzzle of his life. I trust him, he's smarter than me, and he'll do the right thing for him, so luckily, I don't have to care.
I care about making Momma happy and basically, all I have to do there is be pleasant and unproblematic. That's a chore in itself, I don't know if I could manage much else. I guess I should count my blessings that no one is asking anything out of me. It's lonely but I'm used to lonesome.
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littlewiseeyes · 3 months
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The moment I went outside myself, things crumbled. Within there is solid ground. I'm at my best when I am ME.
My birthday will be here soon. Changes have come about where I had to change many of my plans. I'm ok. I don't sweat it or stress it anymore. I need to do some grounding, get fresh air much more often, take the time to put on meditation music and just be. These things bless me far more than what money, social media, sex can offer. I still love those things but I can't let it consume me any further. It's so easy to get lost when trying to escape reality. Here it is you just wanted to temporarily not feel the hurt, fear, anger, melancholy that life sometimes has us wallowing in. But when you go too far, it's very difficult to come back. The strongest and bestest thing you can do in the midst of life's problems is tackle it head on. There is a solution to EVERY single problem. Lying to yourself, running away, existing only in your imagination will not fix what is broken. It covers it, gets it out your view, becomes an out of site out of mind kind of thing. But it still remains there, broken and therefore painful. I got so happy recently that I thought maybe I don't need to see a therapist. I looked in the mirror and said, "BITCH yes you fucking do!" I needed therapy since I was 12 tbh. And even more so at 13. I'm turning 32 this month. Therapy is VERY long overdue. Phuq.
The chance to change is something I'm immensely grateful for. I am thankful I get to get this right. It's foreign to me to be getting this far ahead, I usually quit by now. Habitually my mind wants to. I'm NOT QUITTING this time. I just won't. But phuq I'm getting tired as phuq. When you are taking the steps to change it gets it's yuckiest just before the results and rewards start to really show off in life. I want to spit this hard pill out. It's big, it's nasty, it's painful. But swallowing it will bless me in a plethora of ways. I'm facing myself again. I had fell back into the delusions. I was lying again, to myself mostly. Anyone grown, woman or man must face their truths. Ugh it's so difficult though when you know your truth is ugly, dark, hurtful. But if you can't keep it real with yourself, you can't do what's necessary to start living a better life. You won't know what's required of you. Go before a mirror and just stare for a moment. Be honest in your mind then let it flow out vocally. Listen we're all beautifully and wonderfully made masterpieces created by THE Master, The Great Mother, The Spirit. Let Spirit lead, guide and direct you! You're already phuqing amazing, start treating yourself like it! Start acting like it! Start being the great you, you can be because you are just that! You are GREAT!
I am great. And great things are meant to be mine, in abundance. A lot of shit we go through literally wouldn't happen if we remember who the phuq we are and we stay focused on doing wtf we're purposed to.
If you're set apart like me, you know much of the shit going on isn't meant for us. We'll have many more bright days and peaceful nights when we stop trying to fit in and do what the masses is doing. We are different for a reason and we must live differently for the reason. I'm a hermit by design. When eye operate according to my design!? I don't deal with all this shit I'm currently inwardly suffering from. Tuh and to think I seen the hit that knocked off my feet recently coming miles away. I convinced myself I could just move a few steps to the left and miss it. Lmfao NAW. That hard knockout from the reality you tried or did escape ain't missing contact! Rough but needed. Tough, but now I'm seeded. Change is the water. Rituals are the fertilizations. I'm growing up. Growing pains hurt so good. OUCH, but thank You Yah. Soon enough we'll all treat ourselves a lot better. Collectively more and more people are open learning more about self. For years we were caught on imagine, money, fame. The thirst and hunger for knowledge, peace, enlightenment is growing stronger. Soon enough we'll see more book purchases over BBLS. I've been blessed to cross paths with a beautiful man that gave me manyyyyy books to sink my brain into. 💚 I do hope he knows how appreciative I am.
I want things better for everyone, for all of us, for all of Spirit's beautiful, wonderful and amazing pieces of The Master's Puzzle. Dear reader, friend, sister, brother I want to say I love you. You are art and I say this from my heART. May I be of inspiration? If I can change, heh, anyone can. And you and I? We will. This is a powerful time of life! Reach out and grab it, you can hone it, you are worthy, you can do ALL the things you need to do.
To anyone and everyone doing the work to change for imbetterment, We got this 🫶🏽
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bl6ckr0s3 · 5 months
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Disappointment of So-Called Therapists
So it looks like I left off from the last entry about Ivy Jeffries. Long story short, while I been struggling being in and out of hotels and sleeping in the car, when I tried to open up to her about my situation, she told me that I didn't need therapy, but that I should seek help through the city's services. She said I shouldn't be sending her messages through email because it wasn't secure unless it was only regarding appointment times. That shit pissed me off because she was suppose to be a therapist listening to my fucking problems, but sounded like she really didn't give a shit about what I was going through on a human level. Remembering what she said about when she may not be in contract with my company, I figure it was a complete waste of time going to her in the first place. I gave her a chance, I gave the company a chance and it just wasn't worth it if my company was limited to paying for up to 6 sessions, I will stick to venting online or praying to God and doing my rituals for therapy. I would've given her a bad review online, but her online business listed on Google didn't allow us to give any reviews. I didn't have any energy and didn't want to waste any of my time giving her a bad review over the EAP representative. I will never call her back and I don't need her or any other therapist that don't give a shit. I think she's a sorry shit of an excuse, she shouldn't be a therapist if she doesn't care about people the way she should. Betterhelp was definitely a better therapeutic service and I remember she was talking shit about it mentioning about how they had a lawsuit awhile back about confidentiality. She might have viewed it as competition, but Ivy Jeffries first impression wasn't the greatest to me. She was 20 minutes late to the office and she accidently scheduled a morning session with some other lady when it was suppose to be with me. That already was a red flag that she was disorganized. She wouldn't have to worry, I am doing better right now and I don't need her. The best thing about why I don't need therapy anymore is that Ricky hasn't had a fight with me since the last court order. Luckily, this time I had a male judge and not that female bitch Teresa Bennett, he must have told him something and he doesn't bug me for money anymore. I don't owe him shit after all the child support I been paying on top of the health insurance that I kept in CA for Lim.
It looks like they will be moving to Palmdale because Ricky & Wilma can't afford to live in Orange County anymore. Looks like the high cost of living is now taking a toll on them. Hopefully, one day they make a smart choice and go to a different better state and leave CA. Any other state as long as it ain't Mexico, if they are able to get a house out there then good for them. As long as my baby is safe and well is all what matters to me.
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theold-ultraviolence · 10 months
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hey bestie,
pls don't - seriously - worry it ain't a problem. and I wholly understand that y'all have lives outside of here and important things to do. as for the whole end of semester thingy, I ain't going to lie: I feel it deeply as I have gone through a zombie since february and right now I have finally finished my exams but my mind is just error 404.
(also bestie, I DID END UP listening TODAY to some songs of the new album - not everything because I am a bit sleepy from not sleeping much last night due to... you guessed it... anxiety, BUT I DID MAKE A SILLY LITTLE GRAPH THINGY WITH MY OPINIONS AND THOUGHTS ON THE SONG AND I SHALL SEND IT TO YOUR DMS) (hoping it won't sound creepy).
oh in all truth, I think that oftentimes men are capable of doing stuff - like if you don't know, there's always a silly tutorial to watch ugh -, they just don't want to do stuff and hence relegate it to women, feigning incompetence.
like today we had a few dudes coming for works at our uni apartment and the mess they left... like I get that it isn't their thing to clean up stuff and that they need to come tomorrow to paint the walls so they had no need to clean up as it'd get dirty, but they could have at least flushed the freaking toilette or maybe just dusted the toilette seat, since it was a mess of dust and I had to.
or another thing (can you tell I hate work being done while I am over?) is that we had this dude coming to check on the heater and he left all his dirty tissues and rags in the kitchen sink, although my roommate had brought to him a bin to put them I ugh... men and the tale of weaponized incompetence.
ok over onto my beef with house works being done, but YEAH men get so much for so little shit. like everybody is always amazed that my dad cooks for us, instead of my mom. and like... maybe he just likes cooking... which isn't inherently a woman's activities, although according to many 'women belong in the kitchen'... I just am amazed whenever men think that simply being human decent being brings them to be utterly gods.
(also your friend's boyfriend's story cracks me up because dude... there are literally canned soups that you just have to microwave... I... it isn't that difficult. and google is free.).
also we have a problem with feminicides as well, alongside a whole culture that tends to protect abusers (TW SA: like you have no idea of how many sa cases got pushed back because of stupid reasons, like e.g.: a girl leaving the door open to her assailant I ugh...).
so yeah, I'd love to be out at night and feel comfortable in my own skin and not have to worry about whether I'd come back home. I know many of my friends are really chill, but I don't know... my anxiety gets the best of me and past 9 p.m. I have to be in my bed. safe and sound.
(also I am truly sorry if these messages seem so heated, I don't - TRULY - know why, aside from feminine rage filling me wholly whenever such topics are brought up).
NO BESTIE, I GOTCHA WHOLLY ABOUT THE TRIPS AND WE HAVE THE SAME MENTALITY!
I didn't want to get too much into it, as I didn't want to use as free therapy, but my therapist literally told me that - no matter whether they are positive or negative - changes are truly exhausting and I felt every inch of that exhaustion.
also I do INDEED struggle a whole lot with things out of my own control as I ... might have... a few... control issues and I do hate being caught unprepared (especially from the food side of things, because it isn't a funny experience, although I know it might seem relatively stupid and of limited importance). but yeah, changes and huge sudden things aren't ever good and I do hope to maybe go back there TO MY OWN TERMS or at least with different expectations and a bit less control onto myself. I certainly have a far better experience underneath my belt.
(still, I have to admit that one of the funniest things was that one of the first conferences was to be had in a former asylum, and the fact was that it wasn't that ... bad. like it wasn't any way creepy if anything, it seemed like some place straight up of a fairytale or a summer villa).
also pls... bestie, don't worry about the fics. I, again, totally understand that y'all have lives and busy stuff to do. they aren't going to certainly run away so pls take all the time you need, although I can't wait to know what you'll think about them!
(but no pressure!).
no no, bestie, I GOTCHA! (are we the same person but in different fonts?) I also dread starting new TV series and I casually rewatch all the three same ones that I love and I now know by heart. mostly because I - EITHER - finish a series in a whole week or I start it, pause it and never get back to it. but yeah, starting new fics asks for a whole level of energy that I am not sure I have in this period, so I wholly understand yah.
(still, I shall check out 'dickensian' because from what I heard it seemed pretty cool).
also yeah... I think that the pacing does a whole lot about my liking for a book as well, and just by trying to read the plot of 'the blind assassin' it did seem like a whole lot to take in.
also can you believe I never read anything by stephen king?
it's mostly because I am a scaredy cat but I have always been curious about 'gerald's game' and also 'the salem lot' seems very interesting (you got me at the 'vampires'), so do let me know how you like it!
and oh gods, I hope you'll enjoy 'mexican gothic' and pls feel free to always chat me onto that as I truly love it! also I have been liking 'lady chatterley's lover' so far, although I haven't read all that much mostly because of uni stuff.
still, I can't believe how ... rowdy and audacious this novel was. like I know that it had some trouble being published for the explicit scenes but the whole ideology and themes behind it were definitely far more scandalous than I thought.
also, another thing is that the beginning there's this discussion about the fact that being intimate with somebody lessens the emotional love they feel for such somebody and I couldn't help but think that it's very similar to a concept expressed in a poem by catullus (a latin poet), where he says the infamous 'odi et amo' (I hate and I love you). which can be taken as both the typical antithetic view on love BUT ALSO, about the author's lessened emotional interest in a pure relationship with his lover and heightened favor for a sexual relationships. it's a whole interesting concept, I am a sucker of and when I read a similar reasoning in 'lady chatterley's lover' I was definitely giggling like the idiotic academic I am.
oh oh, I gotcha: I feel like joe was my last summer's obsession, ewan my autumn and winter's one and he keeps on being the one of spring, although during this summer, who knows which actor might I get attached to? (jack o'connel is growing onto me bestie). they certainly need to be british if I want the royal mail to send them.
(and yeah, like ewan is the babiest of my favorite actors, leave that man alone! haven't you seen the sweaty and oily glow of eternal youthood).
oh oh, I am glad you found both the series and although it might seem difficult, roman dialect isn't that terrible (although they have some strange ways for example: 'tagliarsi' - which is generally translated as 'cutting yourself' - means around rome 'having fun'. why? I don't know. it's super funny because there are so many different ways to say something, like to skip school it can be: 'fare bigia', 'fare filone', 'marinare la scuola' based on where you live in italy).
also I hope that you get back to your courses, but also give yourself some credit: you are learning a whole new - complex - language, while handling a life. not all people can do that and you can absolutely take a break from it.
and if you ever want to send me silly messages in italian, I am all for it! if anything your italian might be better than my own...
with this being said, I am off to doing a bit of stuff and then I hope that tonight I'll get a bit to myself to continue finally reading 'lady chatterley's lover' (I have reached to where clifford has asked her to have a baby, I am quite at the beginning as I have told you but hey...).
pls take all the time that you need to answer this and I hope you get to relax and enjoy life and most importantly daydream all you want about eddie and sorceress! reader.
have a lovely day!
-🌗
Error 404 is SO RIGHT, BESTIE! tbh I'm still feeling like that! some things came up that I need to do but I seriously don't have any more brain capacity at the moment because my brain is already in vacation mode, and thinking about my trip next week, but most importantly ON DANNY ELFMAN MODE! because I FINALLY GOT MY VISA, so it's super confirmed that I'm gonna see the goth grandpa! (although you already know this, but I feel the need to sneak this into all my conversations recently, so, apologies kdflkgjdjh) also, LOVED your graph thingy!! (another thing you know by now, but I really did) Anyway, onto my reply!
"they just don't want to do stuff and hence relegate it to women, feigning incompetence." Absolutely. And it freaking sucks to hear that you had to experience that because another thing I absolutely hate next to an incompetent man is people who simply do not respect your space. And this goes for people in general. My mom likes to invite her friends/colleagues to our apartment sometimes, and we only have two bathrooms, one that's my mom's that's inside her room, and the other in the hallway, which is mine, but because it's in the hallway, when we have visitors, that's the one they use. And I always have my things in order and spotless and when the visitors come UGHHHHHHHHHHH JUST, DROPLETS OF WATER EVERYWHERE, THEY USE UP ALL THE TOILET PAPER, THE HAND TOWEL IS JUST THROWN OVER THE SINK, JUST, A MESS! A MESS! And it's awful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! makes me wanna chew through the drywall when I go check my bathroom after they're gone, so I totally understand.
And also this whole rant about men feigning incompetence reminds me of my uncles (all of them, but especially the one that lives with my grandparents). Idk if I've mentioned it to you before, but part of the reason why my brain has been mush this year is that my grandma has been sick and requires 24/7 care because of brain damage. And my uncle literally lives in that house and STILL my grandpa had to hire a nurse (and a very important detail is that my grandpa, at 80 years old, STILL WORKS because of necessity, so hiring extra help puts a dent in his income) to be with them because this fucking man can't, for the life of him, lift a finger and help my grandpa take care of my grandma. Like, men will have egos so freaking big that they can't see past their own noses and put their comfort aside to help one another, it's way easier to feign incompetence. Anyway, long ass rant!! in conclusion: men that aren't fictional fucking SUCK. Which also ties into our respective problems with feminicides. Absolutely, we have the same culture here, that protects abusers. And the horror stories you hear about how women were treated are just awful to think about, and terrifying because you have this lingering fear that, you never know if it could happen to you, so you can't just freely walk around alone in the streets. Because we've both shared that we wanna get out of our countries, I truly hope it's something that can happen to us because, Idk if you feel like this too, but I feel like I'm missing out on so much stuff and my life is just slipping by because I can't do so many stuff because of my countries limitations. I hate feeling that way. It dawns on me that I'm gonna be 30 in a couple of years (and I know that by no means 30 is the end-all of your life), but I feel like I've missed out on life so much because of this.
Also PS. Never be sorry about heated messages, lmao!! I love that we can talk about silly AND serious things! And also, the thing about the food doesn't sound silly at all! Especially if it alters how you feel significantly. I feel so fed up and annoyed about things that maybe other people find insignificant and ridiculous but it's like, they're important TO ME and them being altered because of things out of my control affects ME. My mom is always on my case because of these sort of thing. I'll have meltdowns over things she finds absurd but it's like: you have a plan, or a predicted outcome, and when that outcome is altered, it's kinda like !!! your whole world shifts, I suppose. Like with my visa. They specifically told me: you'll be able to pick it up between 2-3 weeks. AND WE WERE ONTO THE FOURTH and I wasn't hearing from the consulate at all! In fact, the page where you can check the status of your application was probably malfunctioning because every time I logged in, it said 'your search did not return any data'. I was starting to panic because what if the application never came through? what if the visas are ready but because the data isn't showing, I won't know when to pick them up? and I had heard horror stories of that process taking up to 3 to 5 months, and I was already thinking that that was gonna be my case, so goodbye Danny Elfman and goodbye A7X. My mom was absolutely chill about it meanwhile I was losing it, because in my mind I already had a time frame set, and not only was I looking forward to seeing those shows to make up for my horrible year, but I'd have to resell the tickets and that was gonna be a whole mess to get into because I don't know many people that are into them, so I was thinking that I was going to lose my money if the visas didn't come in time. Anyway, yet another long ass rant!
OK BUT BESTIE I AM SO INTRIGUED ABOUT THE ASYLUM AND IT NOT BEING CREEPY, LIKE???? OUT OF A FAIRYTALE!?? I'M WHEEZING! How is that possible!???? I am so intrigued!
About The Blind Assasin, yeah it was A LOT and at the very beginning as well. It started very mystery/plot heavy in the first part, and then it shifts the pov in the second part and that's where the pace kinda slows down for me. Which, I get that's the intended effect because it's being told from the point of view of an old woman, but, just personally, that shift from super plot-heavy and intrigue, to the lady describing her day, kinda threw me off a little bit. And I don't doubt the intrigue and mystery will resume, but I'd rather just start another story because I know this will take me a while to finish, and I kinda wanna just read more books in general. I used to read so much when I was in high school and now I'm lucky if I finish (1) non-work related book a year. I'm really liking Salem's Lot!! BUT if you're new to Stephen King, I'd definitely recommend 'The Mist' which is super short, and not that scary in my opinion, so it would help to get a feel of his narrative style with a shorter story and see how you like it! The first book I read of his was 'Misery' because I'd seen the movie, and the book? omg. I wouldn't say that one's that scary either. It's more of a thriller. So those are the ones I'd recommend! From him, I also love 'Pet Sematary'. I think I might have liked that one more than Misery but that one is scarier.
ALSO!!!!!!!! I'M LOVING THE PARALELL YOU MAKE WITH 'LADY CHATTERLEY' And also love that you're enjoying it so far!!! AHH!! YES! I also was not expecting how rowdy it would be. For its time, I was expecting something a little bit tamer and like, classical? idk what word I'm looking for. But certainly not this. I was also very surprised to learn that D.H. Lawrence wasn't, in fact, gay, because of the way he speaks about the way men view pleasure, in a sort of, condemning and critical way? I was like, there's no way a MAN wrote this. No way. And also the way the sex scenes are described is so raw but honest, and the slow build of the relationship between Mellors and Connie is just something that the movie got totally wrong and that it glossed over completely. The movie stripped away all the grit from the novel!
When you say Joe was your summer obsession and Ewan autumn and winter? YES. PRECISELY THIS. And maybe this is why I'm slowly coming back to Joe because he just feels like a summer kind of love? Bestie you just put that sooo beautiful sdlkfgjslkdjg. Eddie sure feels like the summer kind of love, with the sun and the sea and the music blasting outdoors and going to concerts, while Ewan + Aemond feels like coziness and warm drinks and blankets as you curl up together to enjoy a calm evening. I'm sounding corny as hell, but hey.
Also let me be the down to fully push you into the Jack O'Connell love bestie. You need to see SAS Rogue Heroes, and also maybe when you finish reading Lady Chatterley you can see the movie with him as Mellors because, OH DEAR. OHHH DEAR. I didn't like the adaptation but him as Mellors? yes please. Absolutely (although I did picture Ewan as Mellors while reading the book because of the character being from Derby, oops). That was of course before knowing Jack, and also knowing he's from Derby too sdkjfklkjldfkgj.
The bit about the dialects reminds me that I saw a map the other day about all the different ways you can say (idk remember what word it was) throughout Italy and I was like.....no way.........how am I supposed to remember that!? But I guess it just seems intimidating as someone who's starting out! I'm sure if I was to dissect all the different types of ways you can say one thing in Spanish it would be difficult too! also, there are variations you can find in the Spanish from Spain, South America, and North America. This reminds me! that I found out why Lupo was transformed into Lobo when they both come from the same root! but I wanna drop that in a message in your own profile along with other thingies I wanna say/show you before I go on my trip next week! heheh. But also, thank you for that, bestie! I feel bad because I paid for those courses, but I literally can't bring my brain to focus on those right now, or even on fics. Like I physically cannot bring myself to focus on something or write, even if I want to. It's been tough! which is why it means a lot to me that you put up with my Italian inquiries and just generally, that you keep me company with your messages! :')
Good luck with your thesis bestie! and as always, I hope that you find time in between studies to indulge and relax. Again, glad to know you're enjoying Lady Chatterley's lover, and I can't wait to hear your thoughts as you read! Sending you a big hug and lots of love! x
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jungwoniics · 2 years
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okay since dumblr glitched and everything i wrote was gone, i'll make it more neater and clearer for you 🥺 also this will get long lia :) and no problem if you replied late as tumblr is not only your world 😍
yes, it's true and even i'm glad how close you two became because elly didn't have much friends in real life 😔 and i'm happy she mad few friends here and her therapist reccomended her to write to bring her joy 😊 and i'm happy she's living her life 🥺🤧
so far it's going better but i hope it would be a little more better and thank you for sating such nice words 😭🤧 i always needed someone to talk, who can understand me being of the same age as me. thank you so much lia 🥺 i hope your year is going well too
also my birthday is on 23 feb and i follow IST time zone 😊 yes yes yes!!! let's be friends and #4lyfers, yes we are in the same age and will be in the same class too, i wonder you are grade 10 too??
and yes we can become each other's #4lyfers like really?? cause i have fucking trust issues :( i trust anyone easily 😞 maybe we can make a unit name for each other since both of our name start with L sooooooo???? what do you say?
okay, see these are my favs (btw i'm not keeping up with their content because i currently have my final exams going and they'll end on 24 may. also i haven't caught up their content for the past 5 months 😭) —
enha : 02z (soft spot for rest of enha 🥺😭🤧 but i'm an ot 7 tbh 😭😭)
txt : taegyu and yeonbin (soft spot for ningning but basically i'm an ot 5 🥰)
trainee a : still can't decide 😞
and i don't stan many groups because time doesn't permit and i only listen to your semis sometimes 😔 lmao!! i'm sorry we don't share similar biases but maybe some may differ 🤣
also i see you are getting into treasure, they used to be my ultimates but now i lost interest because of their hiatus just like other yg groups and i'm sorry to say this, yg ain't my cup of tea but i support yg groups.
and i have some questions to ask you, so here they are — 1) do you hide your tumble account from your parents or do they know it too??
2) did you create another gmail exclusively for tumblr only because i used to do that…
3) i get scared off being caught if my mom sees me writing fanfiction because back in 2021 i opened enha fan fiction account on insta and she caught and never said me to do like that but i discovered tumblr in mid may and i badly wanted to start but deleted everytime because i was scared that my mom will find out 😭😭
yeah that's it lia and i'd sit my pants and would cry if that happened, lmfao.
also you can feel free to ask me any questions lia 🥰🥰 idk what questions i'd ask and i felt comfortable talking to you and please do tell me if you feel uncomfy with me.
thank you 💖 — loki
oh omg i didnt know that about elly 🥺🤧 im reallly glad to be one of her moots fr 🥰🥰
yes i think 2022 hasnt really been an easy year for any of us so far 😭😭 ofc i'm always here if you ever need to talk/rant about something <3
oh em gee yes we are #4lyfers 😍 ohmygosh yes unit name..... unit name...... i cant think of any right now 😭😭
omg good luck for your exams !! im sure you'll slay them 😁
ok to answer your qns:
i actually have no idea if they know about my tumblr acc or not lol i think my mum knows i use blr but she doesnt know i write here??? yeah lol
i mean yes at first i created a new email for tumblr but now i use that email for all my other priv stuffs too lol
NO OMG BFF MY MUM FOUND OUT ABOUT MY ENHA FF ACC TOO but she found out about it after i wasnt really active on it anymore so tbh i didnt mind deleting the acc lol but ya she doesnt exactly restrict me from it? she js tells me to be careful of who i speak to online since i was almost scammed once BUT THANKFULLY I WASNT istg the scammers really shld brush up on their grammar 🤭
oh well i dont rly have any qns in mind rn lol but i really do enjoy interacting with you loki <33
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