#and also he has an anxiety disorder. like dude is not just taking her out to places....... | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

capricornsims · 8 months

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Some headcanons featuring screenshots from my Sims 3 Strangetown game.

PT9 and Jenny met in 1985. Based on the Sims 2 memories, she found him drowning in the pool since he dived head-first into the shallow end. While everyone was running away in fear - she rescued him and fell in love at first sight. PT9 vowed loyalty to his savior and gifted her with knowledge about Sixam.

Jenny and Lyla were roommates until she married Buzz Grunt. She doesn't get Jenny's attraction to PT9 but she was supportive. Meanwhile, Jenny tried her hardest to break up Lyla and Buzz because she deserved so much better!

The Curious Brothers were forced to cut contact with Jenny since she 'betrayed' their father by marrying PT9 ( valid honestly - thinking about it makes my head hurt )

Pascal having Tycho brought the family back together.

5. Glarn was an emotionally absent father who paid no attention to his kids. Pascal was Glarn's favorite which was why he went to private school. He was also responsible for looking after his younger brothers when they moved out.

6. Pascal is " Well achually" incarnate. He loves to talk about theories and science. Aliens and Astro physics are his hyper fixation

7. Vidcund and Lazlo spend their time joking about how Pascal takes himself way too seriously. They were best friends throughout school and Vidcund was the one who helped Lazlo get his degree.

8. Lazlo is a genius, he passed school with no effort because he was just that smart. Glarn didn't see his genius because he was too busy scolding him for being messy.

9. Lazlo takes Vidcund out to hang out with his friends and works overtime trying to set him up on dates so he can get over Circe.

10. The Curious Brothers weren't that close - and often butted heads but since Tycho was born they are closer than ever. ( UNTIL VIDUND SOLD TYCHO)

11. I know Vidcund was mind-controlled, but imagine if he wasn't. He's in serious debt and these blue aliens offered him like a billion dollars if he sold his nephew. The Dudes in Black wanted to run experiments on him idk.

12. Pascal never really recovered after his kid was stolen and was overly protective of Tycho. Tycho grew up anxious because of the overarching threat of being kidnapped again.

13. Olive Specter is not a serial killer (allegedly) - she just has really bad luck, but she kept up the bit so people would leave her alone! She is really superstitious because she's connected to the supernatural. She makes good luck charms and ensures that Ophelia is really cautious and wears all her charms.

14. Ophelia has a serious anxiety disorder - partially because Olive raised her to be scared of everything for her own safety. She makes sure Johnny and Ripp don't go under ladders, cross poles, or step on cracks. She gets really stressed out when Ripp makes dark jokes.

15. Olive was a good mom until she was wrongly accused of being unstable which led to her baby being taken away. She tried to get him back but there were too many roadblocks and Nervous was already given away.

16. She loves the Grim Reaper and longs for the day she can see him again. Her partygoer job entails her going to funeral memorials.

17. Nervous met Annie Howell in foster care and they are really good friends to this day. He missed her because she was adopted by her older brother and left alone in the orphanage. 18. Nervous was a constant runaway and ended up in the Beaker's house as a teenager with the promise that he wouldn't have to go back to a group home. Unfortunate :(

19. I like how most people agree on how rude and not nice Nervous actually is. He's standoffish for good reason and gives Vidcund a lot of snark for being into Circe. He's chill with Lazlo though.

20. Nervous is the fun dad, and lets Tycho do whatever they want. Meanwhile, Pascal is pretty strict about his schooling ( which doesn't matter because Tycho has alien intelligence) and being safe. 21. Tycho grows up to follow in Pascal's astrophysics footsteps, mostly to build a ship and hunt down his Pollinator dad.

#headcannons #strangetown #pt9 smith #jenny smith #pascal curious #nervous subject #tycho curious #johnny smith #ophelia nigmos #olive specter #loki beaker #circe beaker #vidcund curious #lazlo curious #simblr #lyla grunt

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meteor752 · 2 years

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Double life except instead of just the sharing of pain and lives they also share a child together

Exactly what the title says

Like, one month after the gang was all dropped into Double Life, they all got a notif about seven new entities spawning in. When checking spawn, then gang finds six multicolored baskets all containing a child, an egg, and a letter. The letter is from The Watchers or smt, essentially saying “Sup, here’s some kids for y’all, lol take care”. Panic ensues

Also all the names are very arbitrary apart from one being chosen for a dumb pun

Liana no last name given

Professional Scammer and pathological liar, Liana is the fledgling that hatched from the egg belonging to Scar and Grian

She’s a manipulator at heart, a con artist through and through, tho she hides it behind sickeningly sweet words, large puppy eyes and bright colors

Has great relationships with both of her dads, even though their parenting styles are very different

Grian is a total helicopter parent, Liana was barely allowed to leave the base as a kid in fear of her getting hurt

Scar does not give a shit, she could be telling him that she’s off to summon a wither and he’d just ask her to be home for dinner

She inherited the “Looks like a cinnamon roll but can actually kill you” vibe from Grian which she uses fully to her advantage

Scarlet Macaw hybrid, though her wings are too small for her to actually use them to fly, but they do help her glide

Dressed in strikingly bright colored suits just to throw people off, and smokes a pipe for pure aesthetic

Can’t build for shit, she’s a shame to the family

Dating Jassy

Wes Double-SV

Local stressed out mom friend, Wes is the baby from the yellow basket belonging to Impulse and BDubs

He’s an overachiever, always feeling a need to be perfect and do everything right

Suffers from a lot of OCD and anxiety

His relationship with his dads are a bit rocky, especially with BDubs

Both Impulse and BDubs are a bit like those Beauty Pageant moms, always feeling a need to prove that their child is the best. This is partly the reason for Wes’ disorders. Impulse can be a bit more chill than his hubby however

He does love his dads though

A thing that does add to his stress level however is the fact that all his friends are fucking maniacs and he’s the only voice of reason they have

Part imp like his father, his horns are his pride and joy

The tallest of the squad, usually carry the others if they get tired

Has a bit of the clock obsession, he’s got both a pocket watch and a rolex just because

Dating Jekiv

Gertrude Statz-Diggity Dawg

Chillest person to have ever walked this earth, Gertrude is the pup from the blue basket belonging to Ren and BigB

She’s a Redstoner, a damn good one at that too, and isn’t afraid to get her hands dirty

Does not give af about anything, just here to vibe

Her relationship with Ren is very casual, they’re more like dude bros than father and daughter

BigB is the more parental of the two, he’s the one who baked her cookies when she felt sad and told her stories when she couldn’t sleep

Dog hybrid and part werewolf, once every month she becomes ‘Weretrude’ (That was the dumb pun)

A big gal, second tallest of the gang, standing at six five, and ripped af, wears tank tops to show off her muscles

Wears shades so much that the light actually hurts her eyes at this point

Still got a lot of dog instincts to deal with, so don’t go throwing any sticks around her because she will just up and chase them before anyone knows what’s actually going on

Dating Novo

Jonathan ‘Johnny’ Tek

The server’s dashing charmer boy, Johnny is the country boy that was found in the red basket belonging to Jimmy and Tango

A true boy of the farm, this lad gets up every day at five am to do his chores, whistling a country tune as he does so

He takes more after Tango in terms of looks, but Jimmy when it comes to personality. He has his father’s blazing temper though

He’s the apple of his parents eye, an absolute breeze to handle as a kid which helped a lot because they’re both disasters

Talks with a very, very, thick southern accent that no one knows where it comes from, since no one else on the server has it

He plays the banjo, because of course he does

Demon hybrid, tries to hide his more demonic features like the horns and tail as to not scare the animals

Secretly kind of a monster fucker

Aromantic, so not dating anyone

Jassy Smallishbeans

Anime ninja extraordinaire, Jassy is the girl that was found in the gray basket belonging to Etho and Joel

Tries her dang hardest to have a cool and intimidating presence like Etho, but she’s a bit too much of a goofball to be able to

The biggest fucking fan of puns, will go to serious lengths to tell a bad and witty joke

Idolizes Etho, he’s the coolest fucking person in her eyes and she wants to be just like him

He’s very protective and constantly worries about his daughter, even if he tries to act like he’s not

Joel is a bit of an awkward parent, he tries his best with her but he’s not cut out for parenting

Jassy is genuinely a very good fighter, stealthy enough to sneak past skulk sensors with no issue, and a master marksman. She just has a problem keeping a straight face sometimes

Has a few anime attributes, such as the unnatural white and ridiculously styled hair, a very strange way of eating*, and the swirly eyes whenever she gets knocked out

Lean mean speedy machine

Has to wear a mask covering her mouth to hide the goofy smile she gets constantly

Dating Liana

(*That thing Anime girls do when they take the smallest fucking bite out of something and then immediately like, orgasms or something it’s so weird, look it up if you don’t know what I’m talking about)

Jekiv Inthelittlewood

The Half dead sass master, Jekiv is the zombie child that was found in the green basket belonging to Cleo and Martyn

Is very monotone without really meaning to, but yeah this boy will roast the shit out of you

He was mostly raised by Cleo, since Martyn wasn’t too keen on having a child. He gets along great with his mom, but his relationship with his dad is pretty much non existent

Martyn tried to reforge it when Jekiv became a teenager, but the damage was already done and the daddy issues had settled in

Absolutely fucking adores frogs, they’re his buddies and his pockets are filled with them

Kind of hates his sorta Step-Brother Novo

He is a zombie hybrid, which means that he can’t sleep, his skin is rotting away, he limps when he walks, and he’s sensitive to sunlight

Wears a light pink cloak to cover up his skin. Is also always dressed in pastel to counter his kind of horrory and gory look

Dating Wes

Novo Major-Moon

Unhinged freakster of the server, Novo is the half elf in from purple basket belonging to Scott and Pearl

Superstitious as all hell, wears a four clover necklace around his neck, a rabbit foot around his ankle and had his pockets filled with acorns

He thinks his mom is really cool and awesome, and even if Scott had the majority of the custody this bitch still turned out insane

He’s got them crazy eyes, a slight twitch to his movement and absolutely zero filter for his mouth, spouting out every random thought he could think of

He’s absolutely tiny, standing at barely five feet, with zero muscle, which makes him the ultimate twink

His makeup look consists of heavy eyeliner and then a spray bottle to the face, giving him the running mascara look. He knows he’s unhinged and he commits to the aesthetic

His dad thinks he should calm down a little and such, but he does support his son in his weird makeup and his beliefs

Adores annoying his kinda Step-Brother Jekiv

Dating Gertrude

Was this an excuse for me to make a bunch of fankids? Yes. Am I ashamed? Not in the slightest, no

Also if ur wondering Wtf kinda names these are, I was just sitting with a document typing random shit in until I found something that fit. Sometimes I got something nice, like Gertrude, and sometimes I just got a random bunch of letters, like Jekiv

I made some cute ship names for the couples as well, so we’ve got Stress and Sass, Tol and Smol, and Pirate and Parrot. Y’all can probs figure out who’s who.

But yeah I had fun doing this, character creation is one of my favorite things and I’d say it’s one of my biggest strengths as well, which is actually kind of sad

Also when I started this it was just the end of session three, and like now two couples have died so rip Team Ranchers and The Box duo, you’ll forever live in my heart

Edit: These babies now have DESIGNS! Check ‘em out!

Edit 2: These babies now have some CHARACTER TRAITS! Also DEATH!

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invinciblerodent · 1 month

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For you oc is problematic game

Arvid (because I'm curious)

And Ray (because I'm a pot-stirrer on occasion 🤭)

Your fave is problematic: OC edition

Thank you, this was a lot of fun! :) Enjoy this pair of problematic men in their fifties <3

Your fave is problematic: Arvid Trygg 🐧

Has intimidation proficiency, but is too much of a softie to ever use it, which is honestly just egregiously wasteful of him. (We failed so many rolls. We got into so many fights because of him.)

Self-medicates his very obvious anxiety disorder with a big ol’ heaping dose of denial, and later his clear PTSD with toxic codependency. His husband reports getting up to 17 magical “are u okay” pings a day, and he may say he doesn’t mind (pings right back, sends like 15 of his own anyway), but, like, Jesus fuck, dude. Not only is he a teacher, it’s also Waterdeep. Whatever even happens in Waterdeep, ever.

Didn’t disclose his nonexistent sexual history, or communicate effectively about expectations before having mind-melding astral sex on what was essentially the first date :( (defining the term “virgin slut” quite inaccurately, but efficiently) (no really, he was, by some certain definitions of the word, kind of a 50-year-old virgin before Gale, and didn't even tell him :/)

tbh also they got married only after like, idk, a few months of dating while in the throes of mortal peril. that's not good rep at all, they shouldn't endorse that.

Also didn't tell anyone, not even his boyfriend, that he's half-duergar. And yeah, maybe they didn't ask, but like, that's still a lie. :/

Litterer!! By which I mean he left the Crown of Karsus on the bottom of the fucking Chionthar, potentially ruining the delicate magical ecosystem down there, and MAYBE even leaving room for the rise of some…. diseased, city-dwelling fish-god. Or crab-god. What the fuck even lives in the Chionthar? Nothing at this point, probably, because the dang water is full of Netherese magic now!!! :CCC

Consumes smutty literature :/// we see your dog-eared copy of A Pleasurable Deal in the bottom of your pack, boy, you ain’t slick, and it’s frankly SICKENING that you’d endorse such smut. (and let’s not even talk about the REST of his collection of stolen!!!!!!!, smutty books. Man, for a Man of the Cloth he sure does consume a LOT of bad erotica.) [I, uh… like to pick something for my characters to collect in rpgs, for him it was the romance novels.]

Speaking of, he endorses organized religion??? Sure, that religion may be the one in which he was raised and is organized around the central tenet of “pick your battles- but fucking pick them”, but still, he’s a priest, and we ALL KNOW that clerics are, without exception, fantasy!catholics, which means that they are insufferable sticks-in-the-mud, and bad.

And even so, he’s double-dipping gods??? Like, for someone who claims to be a Tempuran, he does seem to enjoy the buff from Loviatar, and all that free healing from Silvanus and Selune, yknow? So he’s like, technically cheating on his god, which is also bad. :////

And like, why discriminate against Sharrans, you know. :/ It’s not their fault that their Dark Goddess’ ultimate doctrine is to envelop the world in pure nihilism, so like, convincing his best friend to renounce her goddess was, like, super manipulative. (Yeah, even if it turned out well for her.) (And then he didn't even hug her???? What, because "it was added in a later update"???? Get out of here, that's no excuse. Your programming shouldn't prevent you from doing the right thing. :/)

Gave the gith egg to the Society of Brilliance :/// and sure, he may CLAIM that it was because the rest of the créche turned on them and nobody would have been there to take care of it if it had hatched (and the Shadow-cursed lands really didn’t seem like the best place for a child either), but that’s not an excuse!!!! It still turned out bad, and it was a mistake in retrospect, which he SHOULD HAVE BEEN aware of, and therefore he is problematic.

Oh, also, he like... rejected everyone in camp at least once, which is, like, toxic as hell of him. Way to lead everyone on, man. :/ He should've had the good sense to NOT chop wood in his shirtsleeves. He should've known all his friends are horny bisexuals, he should've kept those thick biceps and that lush carpet of chest hair covered. :/

Your fave is problematic: Raymond Trevelyan 🐴

oh god so many reasons where do i even fucking begin

bourgeois scum. born a wealthy noble. abolish nobility and guillotine his ass. >:(

His romantic life has been a mess since the moment learned what his dick is for, and he consequently also stopped being able to keep it in his pants (slut :///)

Started out dating the son of his father’s blacksmith (the power imbalance! the secrecy! so toxic!!!! the guy was even a MINOR!!!!) (so was he) (they were both 17) (no that doesn’t MATTER right now), then he was engaged to a woman (without disclosing that he’s gay :/), then married a NECROMANCER (unethical, slightly better because it's recycling :///) who was both his technically-subordinate AND like 7 years older than him (sketchy :////), and NOW, after 20+ happy years of marriage and like 3 years widowed, he’s going to be dating a guy who is young enough to be his son??? :///// frankly gross ://// not good gay rep at all ://////

And, like, it's very likely that he's going to become illithid too, so he like, doesn't even give his super-young boyfriend the happy ending he promised. :/ And breaking promises is, like, so problematic.

He freed a dragon that was living in captivity one time, which i’m sure ruined the native ecosystem, introducing a large, invasive predator willy-nilly like that :/

And speaking of, there’s got to have been catastrophic levels of ecological fallout to all his dragon-murdering, now that I think about that. Destroying native megafauna like that definitely caused the overpopulation of all the dragons’ prey animals, and then you can just WATCH the vegetation suffer. (Have there been fewer forest fires? Maybe! But at what price!!!!!!)

His judgment of war criminals seems dependent on whether they were nice to him, because if you dig into it, he’s pardoned one and executed another, and it honestly really just came down to one being his friend :/

Also he's said discriminatory things about mages :/// and yeah, maybe it was him echoing the kind of views everyone in his homeland held unironically and he may have ended up a staunch supporter of mage rights and married to a mage, but, like, he should have known better from the very start. :/

Used a hand he honestly believed to have been marked by the mark of the divine prophetess to jerk off that one time :/

Actually he did also unironically believe himself to have been chosen by a god, and when he realized that wasn’t the case, he still didn’t use his platform to publicly apologize :/

Used influence to change the outcome of an election, is the sole reason the Thedosian pope is all WOKE now :/

accidentally aided the rise to power of a megalomaniacal trickster-god who seeks to destroy the world as we know it :/

and let's not forget that he's not even forklift-certified. doesn't matter that there aren't any in Faerun/Thedas, it still counts.

................ Oh, and technically they're both, like, mass murderers??? In some way??? So. That's gotta add to the pile. But honestly, in the context of everything else, that's like, a minor thing.

Point is, they both suck and nobody should like them. ://///

#squirrel plays bg3 #oc: arvid trygg #oc: raymond trevelyan #can you tell i'm a tragic old man enjoyer #i was giggling to myself the whole time i was writing this

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puppiekit · 2 years

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you know what probably a warrior cats hot take but NightHeart 100% has BPD (coming from someone who has BPD) so seeing the fandoms blatant hatred for him is hilarious and ironic. Scrolling through the NightHeart posts on this sight is on par with all the hate posts I see about my disorder on the internet not even exaggerating you people say the same exact stuff

Like cmon... You cannot tell me this isn't him

Honestly though it seems to me that the fandom has 0 issue sympathizing with or understanding the perspective of neglected/traumatized characters, but only when they express symptoms that are mild and/or can be glorified by the plot. Traumatized characters that turn around to become meek, soft-spoken, people-pleasers, or riddled with anxiety and fear are automatically recognized as traumatized, and what they have experienced is always taken into account when addressing their behaviors/worldview. Same with traumatized characters who turn around and try to overcompensate for whatever it is that they have experienced (eg. BlueStar growing paranoid and isolating herself after the betrayal she faced from TigerClaw, and also ditching StarClan because she feels as though they have taken enough away from her.)

… Traumatized characters who don't trust/like their peers, who express anger and recklessness and resentment, however? As far as most fandoms are concerned, they are just mean, cruel, and potentially evil, even if they aren't violent, and even if they dont want to harm others. (… probably doesn't help that most of the villains in the series project their own issues through anger though). If a character who is traumatized turns to anger, most people don't bother trying to take their experiences in account for their behavior, and sympathizing is out of the question… Can I blame them? Not really. It's makes sense not to like a character who projects their hurt and insecurities onto others. But the refusal to at least acknowledge why NightHeart is the way he is continues to shock me - people have more sympathy for literal villains and murderers lmfao.

Like this fandom is ridiculous. Not only because most of the things people hate about him is actually nothing more than the fault and biases of the writers themselves, but because for *years* the fandom was begging for a character that had real depth and real issues and a solid personality. Now these same people are whining because said character isnt a soft owo anxiety-ridden baby like friggin AlderHeart. Like no hate I love AlderHeart but from what I see people only gush over him and his bare minimum representation of anxiety because he hardly shows any symptoms that aren't already infantalized to hell and back by the internet. I mean just look at how the fandom treats GooseFeather... Dude never once acts out of malice and lives a life of isolation and genuine suffering, and yet the fandom consistently demonizes him and says awful things about him. This fandom needs to cut the crap lmfao

#wc #warrior cats #nightheart #opinion #i just find it kind of ironic that the fandom is always whining about ableism and mental health #but isnt afraid to show blatant hatred and disregard for a pretty accurate depiction of a disorder #its annoying actually

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loveisonaroll · 2 years

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Love Is On A Roll

Jake Kiszka x plus-sized!reader

Summary: After a bad body image week, your friend Jake helps remind you that you are, in fact, glorious in the skin you are in. Listen to the song Love is On a Roll by Don Williams to get the full effect!

Word Count: 3.6K

ALSO – this is for my plus-sized girlies and the friends who can understand and be compassionate. All body types are beautiful but understand that society and our social structure has made it difficult for people with fat bodies to love themselves. And with that has come with a long period of longing to look like our skinny friends. The parts of this story mentioning skinny women are not meant to be prejudicial towards any body type. That’s literally the point.

Warnings: angst; negative self-thoughts; negative body image; mental health struggles (depression, anxiety); mentions of eating disorders; self-doubt; slight mentions of sexual activities

----

“Dude, look at this guy,” your roommate, Bailey, said as she bumped into your shoulder, showing you the dating profile on her phone. “He has a nicer ass than me!”

You looked at the phone and chuckled. A gym rat, typical. “Yeah, how many hours do you think he spends doing squats?”

She laughed and typed out a message. “I’ll have to ask him tomorrow. We have a gym date at 11.”

“I thought you were going to lunch tomorrow. Now he’s taking you to the gym first?” Your eyebrows furrowed as you took a sip of your tea.

“No, that’s with Shane. I’m going to the gym with Jarrett, lunch with Shane, and then roller blading with Aaron tomorrow night.” Your eyes bulged a little, and you tried not to choke on your tea. “I know what you’re thinking, but I want to get myself out there, and what better way than to just casually date?”

You shook your head and just smiled. “Okay, you go girl. Just share your location in case anything happens.”

Bailey was beautiful. She was a petite, fit woman, and was honestly one of the nicest people you knew. From the moment she downloaded the dating app, she was a hit. She had just gone through a break-up, and after some encouragement from you, she decided to get back out there. What you didn’t realize was the sudden comparisons you were now making to your experience with the dating app. Just about every person she swiped on, she matched with. At first, you were thrilled for her; she needed this. Then, when you sat to scroll through your own app, you spent hours to only match with a couple men.

The reason for the differences was obvious: you are a curvy woman. The kind that when you do match with people, they aren’t excited to respond to your messages. The kind that when they do respond, they want to have an “at-home” date that ended in just a hookup. It was infuriating and disheartening. You and Bailey were such great friends because you were essentially the same person. You thought the same and made the same type of jokes, but your physical appearances made people’s perception of you completely different.

But you had come to love your body for all of its dips and crevices. You had a great set of tits, and your calf muscles were insane. You even loved your thighs, devoid of any gap but full of pillowy softness. Your hair was finally in a style that you loved, and your face had cleared of adolescent impurities. You loved yourself, you were sure, but some weeks were hard to remind yourself of that. Like when your beautiful and skinny roommate has matched and scored dates with more men in a 24-hour window than you have in the expanse of your dating-app experience.

You felt hopeless. You tried talking to Bailey about your feelings of loneliness and thoughts of being alone forever, but she doesn’t understand it. “You tell me it’s stupid for me to say I’ll be alone forever, but you can say it? You’re an animal, Y/N. We aren’t going to be alone forever,” she would tell you with an exasperating expression. You wanted to laugh, truly. You couldn’t tell her that of course she wouldn’t be alone forever, someone would eventually pick her up because she was skinny and pretty. You couldn’t tell her that she basically matches with every single person she is attracted to and doesn’t have to compromise just to get a date. You couldn’t tell her that it applied to you because you were fat.

A vibration traveling across the table broke you out of your thoughts.

Jake: hey are you still coming tonight? I can come pick you up in an hour or so.

You smacked the palm of your hand to your forehead, forgetting about your plans with Jake and his friends. You had met Jake a few months prior at a nursery while picking out package-hiding plants for your entryway. After killing the should-have-been-easy-to-keep-alive bird of paradise, you needed something else to fill the space. Jake had overheard your inquiry to the uninterested gardener and approached you with the suggestion of either a peace lily or a sansevieria plant. You swooned the moment you looked over at him, taking in his kind eyes, his soft smile, and his flowing hair. He spoke to you for what seemed like an hour, and gave you his number when he had to leave before you made your decision—to let him know, he explained, what you chose so he could help you figure out how to keep it alive.

Upon the first “I went with the sansevieria” text, the two of you hit it off…as friends. Of course, you had an undying crush on him, and you were even more enthralled when you saw him play the first time after learning of his occupation. Nonetheless, you knew he wasn’t interested. It wasn’t just the “hey guys, this is my friend Y/N,” but also the inconsolable thought that he wouldn’t want you. So, you’d take what you could get. After all, he was a great friend to you and it wasn’t like you had never been in this kind of situation before.

Another vibration pulled you back into the realm of reality.

Jake: if you don’t respond I’m going to kidnap you.

You laughed, picking up your phone to respond. Maybe hanging out with Jake and his friends will be what you needed to lift your spirits.

Y/N: yes, I’m still coming if you are still offering to pick me up. But can I get like an extra 30 minutes?

Jake: an extra 15 minutes is all you get. You’ll look great no matter what

Your heart flipped at his words, and you began typing out a quick response.

“What are you smiling about?” Bailey came up behind your right shoulder, reading the messages on your phone. As soon as you angled your phone to show her your messages, another came through.

Jake: Bailey can come too if she wants

Your stomach dropped a little, but you shook your head clear when Bailey shoved at your shoulders. “What are we doing? I want to go!”

“Dinner and then back to Jake’s for a fire and drinks. I’ll let him know you’re coming, too. He’s picking us up in like an hour!”

A night out with your friends would be good for you, right? Even if you felt like you would rather crawl into a hole than have to bring your beautiful, charismatic roommate with you to hang out with the love of your life who doesn’t know he is the love of your life.

The two of your showered and got dressed in a hurry, barely making it to Jake’s waiting car before he jokingly threatened to leave you behind.

“So where are we going? I’m starving,” Bailey sighed dramatically.

“Mulligan’s on Main. Danny said he was there and getting a table.”

“Oh, my favorite!” you said excitedly.

Jake looked over at you and smiled. “I know.”

You gave him a smile back and turned your head to hide your blush once his eyes returned to the road.

Once at the restaurant, your anxiety lifted a little, and you ordered your favorite whiskey barbeque burger without even thinking. You had Jake and Bailey on either side of you, and making conversation with Jake’s brothers and friends was easy. Jake ordered a new blonde ale and you spent the time before your food arrived stealing sips while he smirked and draped his arm on the back of your chair. You felt giddy and refreshed, and you even grabbed ahold of the confidence to lean your head back onto his arm to look at him through your lashes when he spoke directly to you.

Things were going well, honestly. Or so it was until Bailey started talking about her recent dating habits. Most of Jake’s friends had met Bailey enough times to be aware of her recent relationship status change, and they were eager to hear of her putting herself out there. However, the topic was quick to send you back into the self-deprecating spiral from hours before. You contributed only when necessary, and you could feel Jake’s eyes on the side of your face ever so often. You thought about the years of being single compared to Bailey’s few months, the dates that never ended quite right, and the guys who seemed to flirt with you only for fun. You truly wanted to be happy for Bailey, but your mind wouldn’t let you forget about your dating failure.

“Do you want the rest of this before I order another?” Jake’s voice near your ear accompanied by his nearly empty beer thrust into your face interrupted your thoughts.

“No,” you said quietly with a shake of your head, refusing to make direct eye contact. Jake eyed you warily but tossed his head back as he drank the remainder of his beer.

The food came soon after, and your burger seemed like a feat you weren’t sure you could conquer anymore. You cut the sandwich in half, trying to be as neat as possible with your napkin in your lap. However, the sauce made the burger messy and your brain started to float. You wiped your face every bite and looked at your hands every time you set your burger down before attempting to rid them of sticky residue. I must look like an idiot, you thought, how funny—a fat girl eating like a toddler. I could be in a comedy special.

“How’s your burger?” Bailey leaned over and asked. You took one last bite of your mess of a burger and sighed, resigning to the side of fries to satisfy your hunger.

“Messy.”

“Seems to get messier every time, huh?” Jake chuckled from beside you. You would have usually chuckled back, but in your current mental state you just sighed once more. “Hey, you okay?”

You looked over into Jake’s eyes to see genuine concern—maybe even pity—and that embarrassed you. Could he see into your mind? Or even worse, did he see you the way you saw yourself?

“I’m okay,” you said with a closed lip smile. He seemed wary, but he patted your leg with a nod anyways and returned to his food. You fought back the tears from escaping your eyes as you picked at the rest of your food until everyone was finally ready to leave.

Back at Jake’s house, a fire had been started in the firepit in the backyard, and more friends than had been at your dinner filtered through. This time, you were sat between Jake’s twin Josh and someone from their label talking with them about a trail you and Jake had hiked a couple weeks prior.

Occasionally, you would look across the firepit to see Jake engaged in a conversation with Bailey and a gorgeous woman saddled up between them. The mystery woman twirled her hair around her finger with a smirk as Jake threw his head back in laughter at something she said. Bailey grabbed the woman’s hand from in her hair and the three of them leaned in to focus on the ring she wore on her index finger. Not being able to watch any more, you turned your gaze to the still half full cup between your hands.

“Do you not like your drink or something? I can always make you something else, you know,” Josh said, noticing your inspection of your undrained drink.

You smiled and looked up at him. “Actually, I think I might need something else. Sam made this one, and I really can’t do tequila tonight. Got any gin?”

Josh stood from his seat next to you and dramatically held his hand out with a bow. “Care to join me, m’lady? I will surely make you a better drink than my asinine little brother.”

You laughed and took Josh’s hand. As he placed your hand in the crevice of his arm to lead you back towards the house, you caught Jake’s eye on the other end of the firepit. His brows were furrowed in confusion and you opened your mouth to say something, but his attention was snatched by the girl next to him shoving her phone into his face. You bit your lip to stifle the tears threatening to well up and allowed Josh to lead you inside to make a new drink.

You stared blankly ahead as Josh made you a French 75, too in your head to engage in conversation. Of course, he was talking to her, she’s gorgeous and he’s gorgeous. Why wouldn’t two gorgeous people hit it off? They would be a hot couple. Why would he chose you over someone like her?

“Earth to Y/N! Care to come back to the moment?” Josh waved one hand in front of your face while holding up your finished cocktail. You sheepishly took the drink from his hand, thanking him with a kiss on the cheek.

When Josh went back out to the back yard, you moved further into the house towards Jake’s bedroom. You had been here countless times before, sometimes sleeping in the bed next to Jake after a night of drinking. Every time you set foot in the room, you felt at ease. Maybe is was the gravely and inviting scent of Jake, or maybe it was just because you were hopelessly in love with the man. Nevertheless, you felt comforted.

You sat your drink next to his record player before heading to his en suite bathroom. You splashed some cold water onto your face before turning to look at yourself in the mirror. You humorlessly laughed at your reflection, tears coming back to your eyes and succeeding in their decent down your face. Why would he love you? What’s to even love about you? He’s just being nice to you because he’s a nice person. It’s not flirting, it’s just courtesy.

You roughly wiped the tears from your face and rubbed your temples with your eyes closed. You took a moment before leaving the bathroom, deciding to just chug the rest of your drink and lay down on Jake’s bed for a little nap. However, you jumped a little when you heard Don Williams’ melodic voice from right outside the bathroom door.

When you opened the door slightly, you saw Jake fidgeting with the vinyl sleeve, placing it behind his record player. He looked up at you with a smile that was quickly dropped as he took in your appearance.

“I see my pick at Blackstone Records is growing on you,” you offered, trying to divert the conversation from your obvious state of inner turmoil.

“Have you been crying? What’s wrong, Y/N?” Of course he wouldn’t drop it. He had gotten to know you so well over the last few months, and his caring personality would never allow him to leave a friend when they were obviously in need of a shoulder to lean on. “I knew something was up at the restaurant. So are you going to tell me what’s on your mind?”

You bit the inside of your cheek, looking anywhere but him with your hands on your hips. “I just…am having a rough time right now.”

Jake gently tugged on your elbow to lead you to the edge of his bed. He grabbed your hands in his and gave them a light squeeze of encouragement. “Tell me what’s on your mind.”

“I just feel bad about it all. I love Bailey, but…” you trailed off, unsure of what you were even trying to say. How do you tell someone you are discouraged by your roommates’ recent dating escapades without telling them that you feel that way because of the way you look? And what happens if he agrees?

“What did she do?”

“No, no she didn’t do anything. I’m just getting a little tired of hearing her dating app stories, that’s all,” you start again. “And I’m really happy that she’s getting out there again. It just is funny that her experience on that app is so different than mine.” You sniffled and wiped at the brim of your eyes, looking towards the shelf of records to your left.

Jake’s brows furrowed for a second, squeezing your hand again to bring your attention back to him. “What do you mean?”

You sighed and braced yourself for what was about to come out of your mouth. “I mean that she has had more matches and set up more dates in 24 hours than I have in the past few months of using that app. And it’s obvious why that is,” you said as you pulled your hands away from his to run them both through your hair.

There was a beat of silence between the two of you before Jake spoke again. “I’m not sure if I’m understanding you. You are upset because Bailey is going on dates and you aren’t?”

You stood up abruptly and walked towards the record player. “No, Jake, I’m upset because I hate the way I look! I’m upset because people immediately are drawn to girls like Bailey because they are skinny and pretty while I’m out here fighting for someone to even look in my general direction! I’m upset because I’m always in the friend zone, and even more upset because I put myself there most of the time. I’m upset because it sometimes feels like I am never going to have the happy ending that everyone else is on their way to getting.”

Tears were freely flowing from your eyes as you grabbed the edge of the dresser the record player (and your drink) sat, handing your head low. You could hear Jake sharply inhale and move from his place on the edge of his bed to stand behind you. His hands came up to envelope you across your chest and his chin softly landed on your shoulder.

“You know what upsets me?” Jake’s voice was barely above a whisper, and you could feel his warm breath tickle your neck. “That you think of yourself that way. You are one of the most beautiful human beings I have ever met in my life. You light up every room you walk into, you are kind and will do anything to lend a helping hand, and you make everyone laugh so hard even Josh pees himself a little every time you are over.”

You laughed a little, reaching your hands up to hold onto his forearms draped across your chest. You stifled a sob as you felt Jake’s chest rest flush against your back and his hold tighten.

“You have filled my life with so much joy, and if anyone deserves the happiest of endings, it would be you.” He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss to your shoulder, and you sobbed once more.

“How can I deserve something when no one will give me the chance to have it?” You pushed back against Jake until he loosened his grip to allow you to turn around to face him. “I’ve been on one date in the last month. One. And it was horrendous.”

“Not true, you’ve gone on plenty dates with me,” he winked, trying to lighten the mood. And your stomach flipped for a second, sunshine shone through the clouds, and birds started chirping. But as quickly as it came, it went, and the gloom and storming clouded up your mind once again.

“Don’t mess with me like that, Jake,” you admonished, turning again to grab your drink from the dresser.

Jake grabbed your arm and pulled you back to face him. This time, he placed both of his hands on either side of your jaw, cradling your face in his hand gently. “I’m not messing with you, Y/N. I would never mess with you like that. I’m being true to you when I say that you are so beautiful. Your eyes shine without needing light at all. Your hair is always perfect, even first thing in the morning when you wake up with it sticking in every direction. Your body is perfectly and uniquely shaped, and it carried you into my life, so for that I will ever be grateful for it.”

Your eyes glimmered once more. “Jake, I—”

“I love you, Y/N. And it hurts to hear you talk about someone I love that way.”

You were sure your eyes were as round as saucers, and you reached both hands up to grip onto his wrists. “Jake, I love you, too,” you whispered. “But not just as a friend.”

Instead of answering, Jake smiled, tilted your face up and placed his pillowy lips upon yours. You melted against Jake’s body, earning a slight chuckle from him as you continued to kiss him. You moved your hands from around his forearms to rest behind his head, and his hands traveled down your sides to draw circles with his thumbs on your waist.

A moment later, Jake pulled away with a small “Aha!” You looked at him quizzically, keeping his body close to yours. “This song. Dance with me.”

You listened for the song and smiled as you started to sway in Jake’s arms. “I told you Don Williams was an important record to have.”

“Hush,” he said, pecking your lips before pushing your head to his shoulder and dropping his head onto yours. Quietly into your ear, he started singing along with the song.

So I gotta go, gotta get home early

Be with my woman, soft and curvy

Makes me feel like a King and not a regular Joe

Love is on a roll, love is on a good roll

---

Thanks for reading!! I really hope you enjoyed it. It was kind of difficult for me to write, because it is very real to how I have been feeling lately.

Thanks to @obetrolncocktails for giving me the love and encouragement to finish and post it!

#Jake kiszka #jake gvf #greta van fleet #Jake kiszka fic #jake kiszka x reader #josh kiszka #sam kiszka #danny wagner #josh gvf #greta van fleet fic #gvf

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sleepsentry · 1 year

Note

for the ask game, number 8: unpopular fandom opinion(s) regarding gravity falls. also, love your work. ^_^

Thank you! ^^

Of course these are based on my assumptions about what's popular and these are takes I haven't seen around in the wild.

This kinda just devolves into a headcanon list towards the end. haha ^^'

OK so hmmmm oh boy there's a lot:

Gravity Falls is NOT the best thing ever it just had a bunch of really talented people working on it who made it super fun. But it's far from a golden standard and I don't think it should be held up as a standard, that idea is reductive and creatively stifling.

I don't like comparing Amphibia, Owl House, Duck Tales (2017), Inside Job and many others to Gravity Falls. The similarities are superficial and those shows shouldn't be living in Gravity Fall's shadow. They deserve to stand tall and cast their own.

On that note Alex Hirsch is just some guy and I don't like his stuff on its own that much. He's not that funny or interesting to me, but he is just some guy. Hope he doesn't turn out to be a shitty dude. *shrug*

Stanley is overrated (I love him but jeez guys. He's not that endearing.)

Rick and Morty x Gravity Falls is a terrible crossover, tonally, technically and thematically. (I also am just very unimpressed by rick and morty in general)

Stanchez is bad. Rick can eat my shorts. Stan "deserves better". Obviously the fan creations are good. But they don't change my mind about the base idea.

The stans both did nothing wrong ever and I love them deeply without comparing them. (joke I know they fuck up, but they fuck up together.)

Fiddauthor is mid and boring. It comes off as amatonormative and people overall are very exclusionary over it wich is just being a dick and using a ship preference to justify it. (I dont mean to be mean but yeah, you guys are doing fine you can take some salt.)

Ford and Fidd are more like siblings than a couple.

Ford and Fidd both dismissed eachother and the miscommunication was on both of them. (Similair to stan and ford it's no one character's fault)

Ford and Fidd's relationship has more emotional weight viewed through the platonic lense of fidds being older than ford by two or three years and "adopting" him as a "little brother" in college, and how that followed them into their 30s even when the age gap had long become irrelevant. Rather than just "gay sad nerds have marital issues" as fun as that sounds.

Fiddleford is a crazy, scary, adorable, kind, stupid, genuis. This man contains multitudes, I try my best not to flanderize him into one over the other. He can be all those fun things.

Fiddlestan is inherently more funny and compelling than fiddauthor. (To me, to me.)

Fillbrick wasn't the devil incarnate he was just a shit dad, wich fair enough is very bad. Haha (idk there isn't enough of him for me to truly hate and I'd rather not assume the worst, I deal with abusive parents enough in my day to day I don't need to add one to my fav silly show haha)

Billford isn't "toxic" it's too bizarre for that, and much is left to be inferred about both characters and their dynamic. (Again, assuming the worst instead of something more fitting and fun) It's obviously bad for ford but I thought everyone hated him when he isn't nice to stan or being shipped with fidds so it should be cool. (Sarcasm)

Dipper and mabel fuck up equally and mabel is generally more empathetic and aware of the world around her than dipper who hyperfocuses. (Been there pal.)

Mabel is more similar to Ford and Dipper is more similar to Stan

Dipper is a good boy but a bit on the boring side for me. He's fine. I like him well enough.

Mabel is more relatable to me, but I relate to dip's anxiety disorder so bad.

Dipper would NOT grow up to look like Ford. He'd look like shermy or stan.

Mabel would grow up to be bigger and broader than dipper. She'd also be the one to get glasses and look more like ford. She's already halfway there with the hair and jumpers (sweaters)

Jokes about ford failing to impress girls are cringe, heteronormative and bad. And ford doesn't like anyone. (Bill is his own can of eldritch worms)

Dipper doesn't like girls in the way he thought he should and that's why his crush on wendy played out the way it did, it was never really about her, it was about his relationship to her. How she helped him find someone to admire, and was kinda his first real friend who he felt was cool and understood him, heteronormativity made him think he liked her romantically. He so obviously didn't that it hurts my soul.

Mabcifica is underrated as hell and more interesting than dipcifica. That being said.

I do ship dipcifica but in a queer way. You guys don't get it. They're queer.

The cis/heteronormative takes where pacifica and dipper have children together and dipper looks older but Pacifica is just her kid face on a sexy lady bod make me uncomfortable.

And that's why Dipper, Mabel and Pacifica could grow up into a polyamorous "Vee" relationship. [When one person is dating two people who aren't dating eachother, in this case obviously cause they're twins. It forms a "V" from Pacifica to the Pines twins ^^]

What was this ask originally about?

#gravity falls #asks and answers #ask game #gravity falls headcannon #not art

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dazzle-writes · 7 months

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Can I have a romantic genshin male matchup plz

Gender: cis female

Pronouns: she/her

Sexuality: heterosexual ally

Zodiac: Capricorn

Appearance: 5’2 African American hourglass body (although I’m more top heavy if you know what i mean) black curly wavy hair blackish brown eyes chubby cheeks wears glasses sometimes (im far sighted so it’s usually when driving in class or at the theater)

Mbti: infj

Enneagram: 2w1

Personality: kind smart funny motherly responsible empathetic anxious emotional moody perfectionist helpful people pleaser caring compassionate nerdy curious protective polite respectful indecisive fearful nervous introvert shy awkward clumsy low self esteem low confidence (more pertaining to my talents or personality then my looks) sassy sarcastic (I’m mainly these things with people i feel comfortable with like friends or family) soft spoken cute (my friends think im cute because i can be pretty innocent plus I’m small physically)

Likes: animals books reading writing fantasy magic sci fi anime music video games friends alone time learning personality quizzes sweets and bread helping being a part of something bigger than myself

Dislikes: spiders loud sounds people who harm others people who don’t take others into consideration (like make insensitive jokes or don’t consider the comfort of others or are mean just cause they can) people i care about not caring for themselves (im a hypocrite on this i take care of everyone else but not me) not being listened to weird holes and patterns math and tests (I’m being tested for a math disability and i have test anxiety)

Love language:

Giving: acts of service gift giving and physical affection (if they’re ok with it)

Receiving: words of affirmation and physical affection (although i can be shy about it)

Extra: i pace a lot i sing when im alone i talk to myself im a picky eater (mainly with textures) i have a cat i have minor ehlers danalos (a hyper mobility disorder) but it doesn’t hurt me like it does my sisters i get abdominal migraines which is basically like a migraine but instead of headaches it’s nausea

Is it possible to have a headcanon and a scenario (fluff) if not then I’ll just take a headcanon plz

Thank you

UWA HELLO FRIEND!!! I so sorry this is like......mega uber late OREFWFEWB I started college and two jobs!!!

ANYWAYS

You seem like a very cute and soft person to be around!! I think there are many Genshin dudes you would fit with, but in particular I can see you with Alhaitham!!! Even though he is blunt and can sometimes be manipulative (I.E. his quest SOBS), I think he would be a really good fit for you!!

-I think you help him break out of his laziness a bit!! He can be a bit of a drag sometimes if he doesn't need to do something.

-Reading dates reading dATES

-The kinda man to see you eyeing a book at a bookstore and sneakily buy it for you

-I think Alhaitham's love language is like.....being a sugar daddy BUT LIKE IN A PLATONIC KINDA WAY LMFAO. Like he lets Kaveh live there at his place and charges him rent to teach him responsibility, but he would honestly get whatever Kaveh needed. He makes a shit ton of money but only uses and portion of it and just banks the rest so he's like......why would I not use it on other people.

-I hc that dendro characters are naturally good with flora so he keeps peppermint plants around y'alls room to repel spiders for you

-This man is like the biggest haver of the Tism and has so many different texture problems so he understands being picky

-Will make jokes about you both being "top heavy" with a smirk knowing that if you ever tried to say that Alhaitham, scribe of the akademiya, made a joke about his man titties no one would ever believe you

-He is really affectionate in silent ways with you!! Also a physical touch person and he has no problems in just grabbing you up and carrying you to bed to cuddle and read in silence.

-Will rub your stomach to try and help with your abdominal migraines!

-Lowkey loves when you get him gifts and stuff bc he knows you much thought you put into it, keeps everything you give him!!!

-Enjoys watching you bake. Cannot bake himself. Cooking he is amazing at but baking? Homie just can't get it

-Kaveh is your fellow sweet tooth enjoyer, and see as he lives with Alhaitham he's like.....a bonus to your relationship

One day you came home feeling a little insecure, walking into the house with a quiet sigh. Your friends had said that they had never heard Alhaitham call you cute before like they always did, and it had begun to eat away at you. You quickly found Alhaitham, reading away at his desk.

"Um......Do you think I'm cute?" You asked, cheeks red with embarrassment at asking such a silly question. You almost were about to tell him never mind when he responded.

"Of course I do. I just don't infantilize you about it." He said, not even looking up from his book. He stood and held his book in one hand, and wrapped his other around you. "You are very attractive to me."

"Oh.....Okay. You just never say it....I'm sorry, it was dumb and I-" He cut you off with a small kiss to your lips.

His taller frame felt good as he hugged you close, and he leaned back to gently brush your cheek with his fingers as he closed his book. His gaze was always rather neutral, but he had the softest smile on his face as he looked at you.

"Do you need me to say it more? I don't mind." He said, nodding when you told him yes. "Of course. I think you are very cute, love. I love when you gasp with excitement when you read books. And I really love the way your cheeks flush when I compliment you in public. And when you get excited when you give me a gift. And when-"

He kept going, listing out everything about your personality that made you cute and lovable to him. He wrapped his other arm around you as he listen them off, only stopping when Kaveh banged on the wall in the room next to you.

"He's just jealous of me." Alhaitham said bluntly, kissing your forehead. "I'm financially stable and have an amazing girlfriend."

FGFUW I HOPE U ENJOY MY FRIEND AWAWA

#razz writes #matchups #genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin imagines #alhaitham #alhaitham x reader

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ru5t · 2 months

Text

knowing your partner can potentially make writing together a lot easier !

– BASICS.

♡ NAME: Hannah

♡ PRONOUNS: she/her

♡ AGE: 25+

♡ TIME ZONE: CST (GMT -5)

–THREE FACTS.

♡ I moderate a(n overw.atch) twitch channel/community! It's good fun and very dear to me but also sooooo so frustrating, sometimes.

♡ When I was little I was convinced I was going to grow up to become a veterinarian. I do not think the level of schooling or the uhhhhh amount of strong stomach it takes is actually for me.

♡ I strongly suspect I have an anxiety disorder and ADHD(? or a similar symptom set) but have no official diagnoses. At any rate, executive dysfunction you bitch.

–EXPERIENCE.

♡ HOW LONG (MONTHS / YEARS?): I have been on tumblr since 2011 but I've been storytelling/rping basically since like. ... You know how most kids act out their imaginative play? I did a looooooooottttt of "explaining" (/narrating, whatever you want to call it) and very little physical playing-things-out. Yes, I know what that is a common early indicator of. I'm unpacking that one shhhhh.

♡ PLATFORMS YOU’VE USED: uhhhh paper (as in i'd pass a notebook back and forth with school friends), IMVU, dA, various dms, twitter, forums, tumblr, a chatroom i forgot the name of we'd use for tumblr 'events', discord, wire

♡ BEST EXPERIENCE: Actually just the experience of rp in general. I have learned a lot through writing and the people who gave me grace in the process of it.

–MUSE PREFERENCES.

♡ MASCULINE OR FEMININE: I don't think I have a preference, per se? But I do seem to gravitate toward guy canons, whereas my OC roster tends to be waaaay more fluid and diverse, but I don't think there's any particular reason for this? Just the pattern of characters who appeal to me tend to be dudes in popular media, I guess? I did almost write Liz from Hellb.oy and Nomi from Sens.e8, in addition to the other canon ladies I have on the multi+Kiri's blog.

♡ FLUFF, ANGST OR SMUT: I actually kind of like. what I will call exploring? You put two characters in a box. Sometimes you shake it, or put a blanket in there, but mostly you just.... see what happens. Also tho I'm the fluff queen ♥ Good angst/whump has to come from somewhere and go somewhere else, I don't like to force it or just throw it around without reason or consequence, if that makes sense? And I like smut in theory but I don't have a lot of practice and my comfort level is a verrry narrow ledge I'm working on building up better, because genuinely it seems fun and interesting.

♡ PLOTS OR MEMES: I enjoy a little bit of bg plotting but also sometimes just really want to completely wing it and feel out the chemistry before committing to anything. Once we have a ground floor I like to build (and spiral)!!! I struggle with doing a bunch of memes when there's no floor to stand on, it starts to get really challenging in an un-fun way, and I feel like it's repetitive and uninteresting to write and to read. If a dynamic never has footing it can never evolve, y'know? Gotta give me something, something has to stick at some point.

♡ LONG OR SHORT REPLIES: No preference! Even when I start out 'short' I find I often end up unspooling into longer stuff but it doesn't have to I'm just wordy. I don't care if I consistently get shorter stuff back, as long as it suits the like. Yes, and. of it all. As long as there's something to work forward from I'm chillin!

♡ BEST TIME TO WRITE: I don't have a conscious preference but I do seem to have more success in early morning hours. No idea what that's about.

♡ ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S): Sometimes. A lot of them get teeny tiny bits and pieces of my views or opinions. I have never felt more Seen by a show than when Luke Pat.terson ghost-apparitioned into my life, even if his One Thing is not my One Thing, but we don't have to unpack that. Me 'n Henry have some childhood traumas in common (except he lives in a fairytale where he gets a thing I don't get) but I don't know that he's particularly like me. Maddy did super duper on a technicality start out as a form of self insert, but it's complicated because also super duper on a technicality so did her mom (who actually existed first! which is rare. Normally I build center-out but this time it was a generation back and Tech just sort of happened, which was crazy and fun), and they both really migrated away from that sooo quickly that it's weird to me to think that was ever even technically true. In the long run Maddy got more of 'me' than Mayhem ever did but it has always been in a hyperbolic and/or metaphorical way. She's definitely grown with me, which has been an Experience and a half. All of them, by virtue of being written by me, are subject to my sense of humor in the narrative parts of the writing, whether they would think it's funny or not.

#c:\\work>dir h:\ ooc* //.hnh .lve:bite/

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the-girl-with-the-glass-heart · 2 years

Text

I've never drawn stardew valley fanart before but since you guys liked my Alex and Harvey body swap idea so much I thought I'd draw something for it.

"What happens when a 40 year old wimpy doctor with a dad bod swaps bodies with his conceited 20 year old athletic neighbor on the same day that one of them has a date for the flower dance and the other has an interview that could make or break his business? Alot of really stupid hijinks and some kinda horrifying angst."

Yeah I draw Harvey over weight, fight me.

For those who haven't seen the post I made a long long hypothetical post about what if Alex and Harvey swapped bodies and it got quite a few notes so I'm happy you guys liked it.

Here are some really great things I think would happen here that I didn't mention in the other post.

-Since Alex is a conceited asshole before he gets character development he spends alot of time complaining about how old Harvey's body is and how fat and weak it is or his stupid mustache, the good news is that Harvey doesn't hesitate to call him an asshole and a good portion of this idea is Alex being humiliated by circumstance. The very first thing he said when finding he was in Harvey's body was "look at my hands! I have witch hands! I look like I should be stirring a cauldron!". Don't worry, Alex learns better and apologizes to Harvey about it which actually helps them switch back.

-Harvey gives Alex a ton of notes on taking care of his patients in his absence and Alex is 100% sure that this is gonna be a cake walk, after all, how hard can being a doctor be when you've just got like... 20 people to look after? Pretty hard actually considering everyone in the valley is unbelievably stupid. Marnie and Jodi show up because their kids swallowed marbles, not together, they just both got the worst idea ever at the same time.

Shane calls in to complain about how he feels awful for some mysterious reason, making Alex yell at him "MAYBE CAUSE YOU LIVE OFF TWO HOURS OF SLEEP AND A DIET OF PEPPER POPPERS AND BEER!". Shane is absolutely stunned at this realization, could have never possibly conceived it.

Lewis walks in complaining that he has splinters all over his body and Alex asks why Lewis says it's cause he was naked in a bush, Alex decides not to press any further.

-Harvey attempts to walk Alex's dog, sure he's never walked one before since he's allergic to them, but it's probably not that hard. Dusty then proceeds to yeet Harvey all over stardew valley, smacking him into mail boxes and bushes and buildings.

-People keep throwing things at Harvey and expecting him him catch it, he's gonna have a broken nose by the end of the day if people don't stop.

-Like I said before, Alex has a date with Haley for the flower festival and says Harvey has to go in his place or else Haley will be crushed.

Later when Alex is at Harvey's aerobics class he sees Haley there and over hears her talking to Emily about how she's upset that Alex is avoiding her and how she doesn't even know if he will meet her at the festival.

Alex jumps in to very enthusiastically and somejeay creepily tell her that he will absolutely 100% be there no matter what because Alex told him himself.

Haley doesn't even acknowledge what he just said and asks why a man's in a dance aerobics class, Alex has no explanation.

-At the flower dance Harvey is on the phone with Alex saying that he's terrified to dance with Haley, Alex who is back at Harvey's apartment, chastises him for being a little bitch and tell him him take charge and ask her to dance.

"I don't know how to be romantic!"

"Come on Harvey you can't seriously tell me you've never seen a romance movie before!"

"I mean, I saw titanic once with my mom."

"Perfect! Act like Jack!" "You want me to drown myself?" "No! I thought you were smart dude!" "I am but I also have a generalized anxiety disorder and you're freaking me out right now!".

-Harvey is trying his best, God bless him, but Haley can tell he's incredibly nervous since he keeps looking down at their feet and his palms are incredibly sweaty, grossing Haley out.

-Meanwhile Alex is at home cause he's being interviewed by some medical magazine about what it's like to be a doctor in a small town and absolutely failing to say anything interesting or remotely substantial.

-He's barely even trying to hide that he isn't Harvey, he's putting his feet up on the table, eating the whole time, dodging questions and just generally being kind of a dick.

-Alex was very very adamant about not going to Harvey's dance aerobics class since it's obviously a class for chicks 🙄, then when he gets there all the girls are doing just fine during the exercises while he's slowly dying and can't get up.

-Evelynn keeps forcing Harvey to eat, he cannot physically eat any more food but she just keep on giving him more and more. Harvey genuinely wonders how insane Alex's metabolism is since he can eat all of this and not gain a pound.

-i like the idea of Alex passing out in the clinic from the stress of working all day and also being a 40 year old man with back pain so Harvey gives him a little blankie.

-When Shane and Sam are talking at work sam mentions Alex and Harvey have been spending a alot of time together for no reason, Shane just says "Maybe they're gay.", Sam nods agreeingly and says "good for them.".

-I thought of three angsty concepts for this where one involves Harvey thinking about the possibility thay he could just run off and leave Alex in his old body and go live his pilot dreams no that he doesn't need glasses anymore, one where Alex confesses he's been so rude about Harvey's body because being conventionally attractive and fit is all he has, and one where Alex and Harvey are hit with the very real possibility that they might never be able to switch back and Alex will miss out on a huge portion of his life and Harvey will have to relive his all over again.

-Luckily they do get switched back by the end of the day and learn to understand one another better, they might not be friends but they've learned to respect each other a little more and Alex apologizes for saying all that mean shit about Harvey's body.

So yeah, that's about it, I'd like to make a full fanfic or comic out of this but idk, also alternatively I think body swaps between pierra and Morris, sebastian and Demetrius, and Shane and marnie would be very funny.

Thx that's about it.

#stardew valley bachelors #stardew alex #alex stardew valley #stardew valley alex #stardew valley harvey #harvey stardew #stardew harvey #sdv #sdv harvey #harvey sdv #alex sdv #sdv alex #harvey stardew valley #sdv fanart

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roguemonsterfucker · 1 year

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In the early days of having my dog, I would walk with her and my mom. And we hadn’t had her long but we already knew other dogs stressed her out. She’s not aggressive but if she feels threatened, she’ll defend herself even if the other dog is “friendly.”

So on walks, if we saw other dogs being walked, we would take another path.

So we were walking through the neighborhood and we see a guy in the other end of the block with a bichon frise. There’s a cul de sac nearby so we duck into that to wait for the guy to pass by.

Instead of going straight, he also goes into the cul de sac. Straight for us.

We go into the road to avoid him and he calls “my dog is friendly!” And my mom and me are like “our dog isn’t.”

So apparently this dude saw us with our dog and decided he wanted our dogs to make friends???

Fucking hell. Even people with dogs on leashes aren’t always good…

People really just don’t consider these things. It sucks.

Like again, my dog isn’t aggressive. She has an anxiety disorder just like I do lol. And just like me, if we reach our anxiety limit, we can behave unpredictably. And just like me, some dogs stress her out. She can certainly get along with some. She got along with my parents poodles just fine and has made friends with random dogs at pet stores before. But care has to be taken when introducing her to dogs. You can’t just let your dog run up to her and expect things to go well. And you shouldn’t expect that with any dog.

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hopepunk-priest · 1 year

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Okay since everyone's doing it, I'm gonna do it too

My version takes place in the 70's, the gang is college-aged, dodging the draft by solving mysteries with a background of the rise of grindhouse horror films, second wave feminism, student strikes, "the silent majority," environmentalism, Watergate, Queer liberation, and groovy rock music. As a more adult take, the monsters of the week and overarching villains will reflect, criticize, and celebrate the cultural movements of being in your early 20's during the 70's. That means villains ranging from nerds in star wars costumes to paranoid political scandals to actual real aliens. Stakes range from being inconvenienced to being in mortal peril.

Fred Jones: Mom friend with first aid training (that he learned from med students during a campus protest), the moral compass of the show in that he reminds the gang that laws exist and they are very much on the run, fucking HATES Nixon dude like HATES Nixon. Heart's always in the right place, even if things don't always work out. Knowledgeable in traps and whatever level of engineering is needed to solve the episode, also acts as the primary face. Also just loves mysteries.

Norville "Shaggy" Roberts: former track star, dropped out of culinary school, collects cool belt buckles a la original series, straight man in the horror movie "maybe we don't go in the haunted house" way, brave considering zombies and witch's ghosts are straight up real and he will still never leave his friends to face danger alone. Anxiety disorder he treats with weed, super knowledgable in pop culture which also gives him a variety of random trivia needed to fill gaps when needed. I think he really likes Lord of the Rings and Pink Floyd. Good at riddles.

Daphne Blake: inferiority complex because of her many successful siblings, wants to be a journalist like Gloria Steinem. Has taken a few self defense classes, but overall acts as the second face for the group. Still into make-up and fashion, and can use her skills (and a little high school theatre experience) to make believable disguises. She can pick up when someone's lying and can pick locks.

Velma Dinkley: Jewish. Loves mysteries and paranormal fiction, believes in conspiracy theories and urban legends. Her intelligence specializes in puzzles, historical, and chemical knowledge. She can be reckless, but only because she becomes very single-minded when she's onto something. Snarky, lesbian, and headstrong.

Scooby: Mischievous, food motivated, and gentle. Protective of the group, Scooby is just a big, goofy great dane who doesn't understand he isn't a lapdog anymore. He can talk, no one inside the group questions it, and only a select few outside the group even notice (part of the mystery). Intergalactic being but doesn't know it, he's much more dog than other iterations.

Scrappy: Just appears one episode, everyone acts like he's always been there. Revealed at the end that he's actually a trickster deity, comes in and causes chaos every now and then mostly just to fuck with Scooby.

The Hex Girls: a psychedelic witch-rock group with a heavy emphasis on environmental protection and new age metaphors, actual witches, a sound somewhere between Cream, Hendrix, and Stevie Nicks. Genuinely just friends with the gang.

Scooby is Shaggy's emotional support dog.

Daphne and Fred are together, healthy, and often end up hyping each other up to the point where other members have to step in and go "you're getting carried away, can we focus."

Daphne and Velma met at a feminist rally, and often have nuanced discussions about different feminist theories. Honestly, most likely to commit very real crimes to get to the bottom of a mystery.

Fred and Velma met in elementary school at a Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew book club (or whatever the 50's equivalent of this was) where they were the only two members. Their friendship is like an anti-macho brotherhood, paralleling the overly masculine friendships of the era.

Daphne met Shaggy in High School and she immediately adopted him the way extroverts adopt introverts. She is very dedicated to helping him build confidence, and Shaggy helps her with her inferiority complex and keeps her true to herself.

Fred and Shaggy are very physically affectionate, share a brain cell, most likely to get into shenanigans if left alone together. Second most likely to get into shenanigans if left alone together are Fred and Daphne.

Shaggy and Velma have a shared interest in music and films, and love talking conspiracy theories.

Shaggy and Scooby are inseparable. Real boy and his dog vibes.

They all smoke weed on screen, are constantly broke, they all are capable of being equally intelligent and dumb as rocks, they're all snarky in their own way, and they all say things like jinkies and Ruh Roh to like... Murders and cryptid kidnapings and issues of national security.

#scooby doo #adult scooby doo

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echonvoid · 2 years

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Holy Shit!!! Thank you guys so much for 50 followers!!! Have a celebratory screenshot redraw of the best bois!!

I started with just wanting to draw them with face masks (a strange benefit from quarantine; I never knew how much I loved wearing masks); which led to wanting to draw them wearing merch outfits. I spiraled from there. Raph’s was the hardest cuz I wanted it to be like corpse husband or the dude from Tokyo ghoul; an eyepatch face mask combo. But neither fit. So a teddy bear would do (although now I’ve totally decided it’s a knock off glam rock freddy)

Other headcanon shit:

They all definitely had a Minecraft phase that they will sometimes re-hyperfixate on (Pbbfffttt I’m not projecting I dunno what you’re talking about/s)

Techno’s death hit them all hard. He was definitely a MC CC that they all enjoyed; the potato war was much quoted in their household. He probably passed shortly after the movie, so it was salt in already massive tender wounds.

Dinosaurs was a thing they love because of splinter and the Jurassic Park series; he hyperfixated on them when Jurassic World came out. And they all loved getting to share it with him. It was one of his healthier mental and physical health times when they were growing up. Only Mikey actually ended up hyperfixating on dinosaurs, to the point he’s the only one that can name the more obscure dinosaur species

MCC is sacred. They, splinter, April and all their other friends join. It’s essentially the Super Bowl for them. They all pick/vote on who perspective they’ll watch from (Philza being the most often picked) eventually Draxum is roped in as well (Mikey definitely bonds with him by playing Minecraft with him)

Individual Headcannons:

Leo:

Still has his can, it’s just pretty hidden. He’s a huge Ranboo fan: I mean Gender and Gay? Sign him up. (Also the fact that they can both teleport in some fashion or another is just an added bonus)

It took him a long time to accept his transness; he never felt like he should consider himself that since he’s amab and a demiboy. Finally April and Donnie helped him accept that he’s still trans, transitioning or no.

He still struggles with it, not wanting to take away from “actual” trans people, but he’s working on it. And the fucking comfy ass pj pants really help.

Donnie:

The cape/cloak is supposed to be JoJo’s Bizarre adventure merch (a cloak I saw on their store) but all the cloaks had ridiculous patterns and character art on the back, and I had no fucking idea how I’d even go about doing that. So you get a mosaic esque one instead

The only other merch he’s wearing (except for maybe slippers idk) is a Philza beanie, which of course says Dadza on it; it was given to him as a gift by Mikey in honor of all his robotic children

The non-Bi-nosaur is my pride and joy, it’s based off of this I found while looking for ideas and inspiration (I added the Bi part, god I love puns)

God I want the pants I drew for him. Oh and he’s definitely wearing arthritis gloves to help with pressure sensitivity and joint pain

EDIT: I totally forgot to mention that Donnie’s mask is based on Corpse Husband

Mikey:

Made his own mask based off of some of my own versions of c!Ranboo. He’s a huge fan of beeduo and the whole arc where they adopted Michael. Fell in love with Minecraft bees. They spent weeks drawing the Minecraft family. (Fell out of the fandom cuz of the craziness of the kraang, and all the ccs doing different things)

The jacket is definitely not the same matching pair Tubbo and Ranboo bought; not at all /s

And yes her shirt has a Minecraft EnBee on it.

At this point it’s safe to assume they’re all wearing arthritis gloves to help with all kinds of pain and sensitivities. Mikey’s help with a cooling salve he puts on whenever his scars start feeling like they’re lighting on fire. The glove pressure is just a nice soothing bonus

Raph:

I need to give Poot Raph some more love, he’s definitely how I feel as an eldest sibling and someone with very nasty anxiety disorder. Apparently my love of twins is too powerful

Like Donnie, he has a burning blistering rash along his skin where the kraang infection had been. It healed after a couple weeks but the scarring and irritation remained.

The siblings all compare him to Glamrock Freddy, which to him is the highest honor they could bestow upon him; it really works well since both Freddy and Raph were mind controlled at some point (a fact that they don’t bring up too often)

Raph’s shirt says “Dinosaurs are cool; Transphobia is not” (from the great Jammidodger) and his Jacket is a Techno Memorial hoodie

His right eye can only see in Ultraviolet after the Kraang invasion. The eyepatch is incredibly important so he doesn’t get a sensory overload or blow a breaker in his brain from such different spectrum inputs

This is what he sees:

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multi-lefaiye · 2 years

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ok I am very sorry for taking so long BUT assumptions for Jack Townsend:

has an anxiety disorder

has trouble coming to grips with reality sometimes; maybe dissociates

has trouble making and keeping relationships

morally grey

No need to apologize!!! Thank you for the assumptions about my most special of blorbos

He does have some pretty bad anxiety! One of many reasons I love and relate to him so much. There's a scene in one book that I love so so dearly where he's in the car with Amelia and she's not responding when he tries to make smalltalk, so he gets nervous thinking she hates him, and hid anxiety spirals until he just starts infodumping to her about some book trivia. Love that for him.

This is true as well, and tbh it's one thing I like to explore in fanworks with him. Jack deals with hallucinations and delusions to varying degrees of severity, and he doesn't always have a strong handle on reality as a result. This is made worse by other characters either encouraging his delusions as fact or telling him point blank that he's wrong and can't trust his own perception. Also yeah he does tend to disassociate at times,,, my boy

This is also true! He tends to push others away more often than not, and while he's generally a nice enough dude, he tends to lash out and snap at others easily. As far as Jack's concerned, people tend to either hurt him or are hurt by him, so he should be alone.

I'd say he is, but more in the sense that morality is complicated and Jack does what he has to to survive. He'd never hurt someone without a good reason, for example, and while he has the capacity to go fucking feral (shovel scene my beloved <3), it's rare.

#talk to the bunnykitty #eggstra special #jack townsend ❤️#my special special blorbo #i love him so much #tales from the gas station #thank u!!#blorbo ask game

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jerzwriter · 2 years

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What’s your MC’s favorite thing about herself (both her body and her personality) ? And about Ethan?

What’s your Ethan’s favorite thing about himself (body and personality)? And about your MC?

Same for Tobias and Casey :)

Hey Nonny! Thank you for the ask.

Ethan & Kaycee:

Kaycee's favorite thing about herself is her eyes. She thinks they're pretty (they are) but they are also very expressive, truly a mirror to her soul. Since she's an up front person, she likes that. Her favorite thing bout her personality, is that she does not give up.

Her favorite physical thing about Ethan is also his eyes, but his butt is a close second. lol She has many favorite things about his personality, his sarcasm is something she loves, but what she loves the most is when he's vulnerable, because he cannot be that way with 99% of the world, so it's such an honor that he's that way with her and she never takes it for granted.

Ethan's favorite physical thing about himself is his endurance. 😏 OK not just for that. lol Seriously, he takes very good care of himself and it pays off. The appearances are nice, but what he likes most is that he can complete that run he wants to take, work a double with ease, and... yeah... that too. 😏 Personality wise, he'd also say endurance - because he can set his mind to something and see it through.

His favorite phyisal thing about Kaycee is her smile, but her boobs and butt are close seconds. lol HIs favorite thing about her personality is how loving and giving she is, not only to him, but to all. He sees how much she brings to those around her, her friends, her patients, their family, especially him and Emma. He is in awe of it.

Tobias & Casey:

Casey's favorite thing about herself would be her smile. She thinks everything else is secondary to that. Her favorite thing about her personality, her ability to see the bright side and not to take things too seriously. Keep in mind, she has an anxiety disorder, so sometimes her mind plays games with her and she isn't able to do that, and it's really upsetting to her. But, that makes her appreciate it even more.

Her favorite physical thing about Tobias, that's hard (no pun intended), she is obsessed with his body, but the two things that get her the most are his eyes - he can seriously melt her with just one look - and his smile, especially his smirk. Poor girl is really helpless against it. Her favorite thing about his personality - he is the sunshine. Don't misunderstand, she is sunshine too, but he eclipses it. No matter what, he will find the bright side of things, especially when it comes to her and things in their life. She feels like they can overcome anything together and it's because he makes her feel that way.

Tobias's favorite thing about himself is everything. lmao JK - dude, this one is difficult. I'm going to say his chest and arms. He puts a lot of work into them, and he's happy with the results. (It's also probably something else, but we'll leave it out to keep this PG-13 lol). Personality wise? His sense of humor. He loves making people laugh and feel good about themselves, and he does it well... and he knows and appreciates it.

Thanks for the ask! :)

#ethan ramsey #ethan x kaycee #tobias carrick #tobias x casey #asks answered

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myhalloweendreams · 2 years

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I’m feeling bad about myself so I guess I’ll get in a pity time rant... sorry about that and please ignore this post

This is just me letting out some of my sorrows... I guess missing my therapy this week bc I was too focused on work didn’t help at all so I’ve to let it out

Well I’m feeling like shit bc I cant afford to live... Yay!! (life is hell too, but mostly bc of money and tiredness)

Get in the line, right?

So many people are going through this, I should stop mopping about it... I truly feel bad about being like that

like yeah u’re fucked, but if this is all u think about, will it solve anything? It ain’t, right? and I know that, i do, but still I’m always so terrified and concerned about everything and what the fuck i’m gonna do

I feel like a freaking burden and an incompetent adult... like this job doesnt pay me enough for surviving, but it isnt even a minimum age job and I really cant get anything better, I dont have enough qualifications or experience for getting anything else even in the same payment range

I work a lot, I don’t get paid enough and to help all that I have no day for receiving my payment ... it’s already the 11th day of the month and I didn’t get my payment yet, last month I receiveid my payment at the 27th of the month so I’m always stressed about if i’ll have money to pay my bills before their due date

I’m also always stressed that I’ll lose this job too... I’ve no way to surviving without it...Yay!!! How fun!!!

I eat awlfully bad and basically every single person in my life is concerned about it, but 1 i dont know how to cook and yes i know that i could look it up recipes in the internet and try until I get it right, but that get me to my second problem:

I dont have enough energy to try... I literally live all my days without energy

stress + an anxiety disorder + depression + bad eating habits + not being in the sun ever + no exercising + terrible sleeping quality = me feeling like shit and always tired as fuck every single day of my life

what gets me to not having energy even for the most simple tasks, including cooking, showering, brushing my teeth, etc.... I cant be trust even to eat, sometimes i dont even have enough energy to freaking eat

I’m always concerned about not having enough money to pay my bills + my meds + food + the least of my cat’s necessities + the house things i have to buy interchangeably with my roommates... and i dread having to ask for help of my family bc it feels like a certification of failure

I’m so out of it that I’ve medical exams requests pilling up, bc even tho my aunt decided pay a health insurance for me (god bless her soul), bc she was concerned about me, doing the exams mean that I’ve to pay for go there and comeback + whatever meds or wtv they ask for wtv they find wrong.... so i dont go + I’ve little to no energy to deal with it

I mean i have a pain in my jaw, that I’m pretty sure that i displaced, for more than 4 weeks and i didnt go to look it up bc i know i cant afford wtv they ask me to do about it... I literally am in pay all day, every day at least an mild way, in a good day and eating and opening my mouth hurts like hell, but here i am just pretending nothing is happening, bc u know, poor people cant afford getting hurt

Dude, I was even like “I’ll go to a nutritionist to learn how to drink less milk so I can save money” but then i learned that i cant just get an appointment with one, i’ve to go to another doctor and this doctor has to give me an referral to go to them... I dont have enough energy for that... common help a bitch out

How much I’m trying to save up?

I avoid to take meds so I dont finish them and have to buy more... headaches, flu, stomachache, diarrhea or wtv only gets to be treated with meds if it doesnt go away by itself

I count my meds so i can make my psychiatrist appointment when it’s about to end so I dont have to buy different meds and waste the ones I already bought bc he changed them for others... are the actual ones working perfectly? probably not, but at least I wont lose money with that

(they change my meds a lot bc everything seems to stop making effects on me or at very least not making enough effects T-T )

My family wants me to buy hair supplements bc I’m getting more and more bald... i dont have money for that sweeties lol

like genetically i’m supposed to have not that much hair, but u add the stress, the anxiety and the depression to it and u get me losing more and more hair, to the point i have some bald spots and need to get my hair in some specifc ways so they dont show... Yay me³ !!

(for my family: please sweeties stop caring, i cant afford shit)

Ohh I forgot to metion, my job (home office) that doesnt pay me enough to survive normally now wants me to go to the office for meetings so lets add more travel fees to the already overpast budget

since i’ve all that going on my skin is terrible bc u know it doesnt really answers well to all that... so I’ve bad hair, bad skin, not enough money to surviving (what is leisure? I’ve no idea of what it’s to do anything for fun... i cant afford such a thing lol), enough stress, anxiety e depression to make be in the very edge + u know all the health stuff not being look up and no energy

i dont know whats peace of mind for so long now that I’m losing it, but at least I’m doing it with a smile in my face so at least my family doesnt feel burdened lol

so I guess i’m doing peachy and everything is okay lol

Well at very least I’ve my Agatha... she’s the bright side of my life

the little meow meow keeps me haging there, my baby girl is an angel and i love her with all my heart

*Me having a hard time at working*: look at my cat and go “well, I’ve to pay ur food sweetie potato... so let’s keep going”

*me not wanting to get out of bed*: remembers I’ve to feed my baby and attend to it and get up graciously as a freaking zoombie but i do

and so on

-----------------------------------------

Well, well, well... now that I started to talk about Agatha, let it out and I cried a river I’m felling a little better

So since I’m using this as a adjunct therapy or somenthing I guess I feel like doing smt every therapist told me to do but I didnt do bc I felt like it would just make me feel worse, bc I cant have it... making a list of things I would want

I guess the first thing would be: be capable to pay all my things without problems. U know? not having to get worried about money

the second would be: be able to upgrade the things I use in my daily life

the third: be able to give Agatha all the things I think she would like... treats, the best cat food, environmental enrichment and anything and everything she shows interested in

fourth would be: probably buy the things I like or want just bc I want to , without worrying about expending money... what totally includes buying things for all the people that I care about to my hearts content and giving them (or sending them) all the things that make me think of them and giving money to all the people that i cross asking for it or working in the crossroad

- maybe taking care of the health things that have to be taken care of (it should be somewhere in the list i guess) lol

- do things for fun

- learn things for pleasure

- buy things for and do diy things ( i love to create and to do new things)

- learn new languages... like a new one every time I finish the last one

- relearn Interior Design stuff and learn Graphic Design (i love do things in the computer)

- have a job that I like... I mean I really like (and I know that even like what u do u dont like it every day but still can u imagine working in something that makes u want to get up in the morning happily)

- retrieve my reading ability and read a lot (buy all the books that catch my eyes *---* )

- getting to know more awesome people

- learning physical things that I find cool (like i dont have any affinity with anything physical, I have no strenght either, I also have labyrinthitis what makes me give every time I try)

- buy my mom and my mom a house and give them enough money that they dont need to be worried about bills anymore (well this is probably higher in the list but since is a bigger thing I only thought about it now lol )

- taking care of my apparence I guess... I mean I would love to be able to dress in a way that i like and really be able to try things and find my own style but it would be cool to try to take care of own self too i guess... I’m not much but I guess with money and effort even I could get better, I mean my best can not be the best but still my best

- living in nice place that i’m not scared of being thrown out at any minute (renting a room in a strangers place is very worrisome)

- OMG!! I just thought it: Go visit my international friends !!!! *----* (this one is hella important)

- do something praise worth

- have a little waterproof portable speaker so i can hear music while showering

edit: somewhere in the begginig would be not being tired and not feeling miserable all the time, getting over my social phobia, stop having panic attacks, not driving myself insane with anxiety and intrusive thoughts, having my attention spam back, get over my body dysmorphia ... I went all for material things and forgot some pretty important stuff

This list didnt get not even close of the right order lol

it just went in the i just thought about it order lol

I guess I cant think of anything anymore... I’m already tired of dreaming of things I cant have lol

but it was kind of fun think about nice things

#ranting #bullshiting #ignore this #i had forgotten the read more thing #i should be using it in every personal post #lol #nothing to see here folks #how do u spend ur weekend night?#crying my ass off #while taking stuff out of my chest for no one to see #i guess letting all out is hard but at least it feels a little less burdening #not wanting to let anyone see this side of u is hard bc u dont have anyone to talk about it #but i prefer to not burden anyone just bc i feel bad #but rn thinking about it I guess I would like the people i love to tell me if they are having a hard time #even if i couldnt help i would like to at least listening to them #what a hipocrite #maybe i should talk with someone #maybe #maybe someone would not feel the same #idk #well i just took way too much time writing all this #now ill just let it go #bc im really tired and emotionally exhausted

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