#and I’m saying this as someone who is trans

[nekropsii]

Every time - and I mean every time - I post about Transfem Dave, some wretch slops miserably across the floor to tell me something like “Dave is transmasc but this is cool too I guess!”

Firstly, part of Dave’s deal is the fact that he’s repressed and the kind of masculinity he grew up with is oppressive and exhausting to him. He’s not eager to perform the brand of manhood forced upon him by his father, he’s tired of it, he just wants to drop it all and never touch it again. Being exhausted of performing masculinity before the story even starts and just wanting to rid yourself of the role does not sound all that transmasculine. To me. That sound like the exact opposite, actually. I don’t know literally any trans men who hate performing masculinity or being a man. Finding joy in that is kind of their whole thing, is it not?

Secondly, why is it that you feel the need to correct me? Why is it that when someone says they see a character as transfem, you want to correct them? To say, “well actually, they couldn’t possibly be transfem, that’s silly, but it’s cute that you think that!”, and discard the thought entirely before ever even attempting to understand? I’m certain you’d be agitated if someone did the same damn thing to you, why is it fine when you’re doing it about a transfem headcanon? Answer quickly.

#fucking exhausting. get out of here #homestuck #dave strider #cw transmisogyny #nekro.txt

[honeyblankets]

the thing that first got me somewhat radical was the fact that trans ideology/logic crumples after one argument against it.

i literally started researching gender ideology to become a better trans ally, as did most of the radical feminists i interact with. i kept seeing people say “define a woman?” and i didn’t know how to answer it in a ‘trans-friendly’ way. all the trans activists i knew answered something like “someone who identifies as female” but how can you identify as a sex which you are not? or they answer as “anyone who identifies as a woman” but then, what is a woman? “it’s a gender identity” but gender isn’t real, it’s a social construct? so identifying as a woman is simply identifying as the stereotypes and gender roles assigned to women from the patriarchy. so i thought, that can’t be it, can it?

but it is. there is literally no legitimate answer to this question which agrees with trans ideology. then i question this, and get labelled a ‘terf’. i didn’t even know what that meant, i just knew i should hate them because the people i otherwise agreed with said that they were transphobic and sexist and hated women and were conservatives.

and then i started to think critically. i started to see news story after news story of women’s spaces being destroyed while men’s were left untouched in the name of “trans inclusivity”. i started to see posts with thousands of likes saying lesbians are bigoted for not wanting to have sex with males. i started noticing that medical terms were only ever deemed exclusive if they originally applied to women like “chest feeding” or “people with vulvas”. i started seeing people attack women relentlessly for simply questioning these things. i started noticing that the only people who ever benefited from trans ideology were males.

and now i’m a radical feminist! :)

and it’s not scary and it’s not evil and it’s not exclusionary and it’s not bigoted. may all the feminists refraining from questioning trans ideology because of being ‘cancelled’ and berated discover their answers and feel free enough to speak their mind. xxx

#feminism #radical feminism #transgender #women #gender critical #mine

[our-trans-youth-experience]

Tw: transphobia

Kids in my classes talk about wanting trans people dead, no shame, with me sitting literally in the chair next to them. I’m not out at school. But it’s obvious. It should be obvious. AND EVEN IF ITS NOT WHO SAYS THAT

(someone in another class literally said the d slur not about me or anyone at our school and it’s not a trans slur sure but it still made me feel so unsafe)

-🪶

That's not ok, and you have every right to feel unsafe. Trans kids deserve to become trans adults and shouldn't have to feel scared of going to school because someone might hurt them or call them slurs.

#our trans youth experience #trans #transgender #trans youth #trans kids #enby #nonbinary #transmasc #queer #transfem #protect trans kids #protect trans rights #protect trans youth #protect trans lives

[lotshusband]

i got dumped by my bf (we’re both trans) bc the fact that neither of us are amab makes sex dysphoric , it’s not his fault and it’s not my fault and I’m just trying very hard not to blame being trans or born afab etc , yknow it’s not guys faults that i like my body how it is and how it is isn’t super attractive or masculine , ,,, idk if you have any advice but if you did i’d appreciate it

idk how long you guys were together & if it was a “i thought it would be okay but it wasn’t and i’m sorry” after a month kinda vibe (a little more understandable, while still suspect) or if it was a longer relationship, but i still think this is a fucked up reason to dump somebody for no matter how long you were together. anybody can end a relationship for any reason, obviously, but what this tells you about your ex is that he is an immature person with deep-seated issues who was not ready to be in an intimate relationship with you— you do not need to take on his baggage as your own, and your body has no bearing on your worth as a partner or as a trans person.

blaming his boyfriend’s body for his own dysphoria is an insane thing to do, i hope you know that… saying you’re too feminine and that makes him dysphoric is a childish & selfish reaction that raises a major red flag, imo you are lucky to no longer be involved with somebody who so clearly Cannot hang!!! what a cruel thing to express to someone he supposedly cares about.

in my experience, dating another trans person has been a source of nothing but peace and rest. both of us have our own dysphoria issues to work on, but when we’re together it feels like relief from societal expectations, and sex is euphoric because we get to reinvent sex from the ground up— being trans means we get to rewrite the whole script. that’s what T4T is supposed to be like… loving the things that make your partner trans and glorying in trans sexuality, in all the different possibilities and permutations it offers. i hope you get to experience that with your next partner :-/

#nathaniel.txt #replies #anon

[autosadist]

Hi, I’m admittedly a total idiot and I understand it is NOT your job to educate me, but I’m curious what about “estrogen person” or “testosterone person” is offensive? I really don’t mean it in any kind bad way just really want to understand (blame the autism) bc it does seem like the reasoning for this phrasing is due to the hypothesis that it is the higher levels of the hormone that relates to paraphilia. It seems like maybe it would be better than saying “man” for t people and “woman” for e people. Obv there’s something lacking in my understanding here and it’s making me feel sooo ignorant tbh

i don't mean to be short/unkind here but i can't afford to mince words and don't have some carefully-structured response like usual so i'll just talk straightforwardly: associating someone's sexual fantasies with their hormones is textbook bioessentialist garbage, it comes from the same line of thinking that has kept many trans women gated from countless "women's events" by defining them by their penises and defining those penises as a sort of symbol of violence/potential threat, it's just a way of recategorizing people back into two distinct categories of biological sex but this time it's ! woke ! because now we're saying "testosterone-people" and "estrogen-people" and surely that accounts for trans people, right? but it doesn't, not in any useful way. it still very plainly reduces people down to blood tests and body parts and what we believe those blood tests do or don't say about what they might do with their bodies. at the end of the day, language like this is going to be used to other trans people and transfems specifically. imagine for a moment a trans woman who cannot get access to hrt - or doesn't want hrt - being called a "testosterone-person" here, and imagine for a moment what the crazy shit being said about testosterone and paraphilias might further imply about those women. It's just yet another avenue to frame transfems as violent predators, and i understand that someone looking at the phrases "testosterone-people" and "estrogen-people" who knows and cares about trans people might find that odd because you might be inclined to say "well, naturally a trans woman is an estrogen-person," but (1) most people will not try to be so charitable with language like this and (2) some transfems aren't on estrogen and some transmascs aren't on testosterone and these terms ultimately have things to say about those of us who aren't on hormones. sorry that this is kind of disjointed, maybe i will try to write a clearer post about this after some food and coffee

#i could have just said 'im a trans guy and im not on hrt. am i an estrogen-person' but i dont think that really goes as deep as i need it to

[nouies]

hello and welcome to the may fic rec featuring my favourite works from the few i read during the past weeks. as always, please check tags before reading. if you liked the fics please reblog their posts, leave kudos and write a nice comment. happy reading! rec tag | more rec lists

— harry/louis —  

໑ just a couple of my cravings by YesIsAWorld / @louandhazaf (G, 3k, acquaintances to lovers, start of summer, quitting smoking, asthma) Summer's just around the corner and Louis' battling his addictions… Cigarettes and Harry Styles.

໑ House Husband by wanderlou (M, 11.8k, established relationship, sassy wife au, kid fic) Louis and Harry are happily married with two beautiful kids.Harry is a lawyer who provides for his family and Louis is his sassy house husband. This is a week in their life.

໑ Rewriting the Melody by LadyAJ_13 / @ladyaj-13 (T, 26k, friends to lovers, canon divergence, famous harry, non-famous louis) Louis doesn’t get put in One Direction. This time, the path to true love takes the long way round, including singing in toilet cubicles, fruit baskets, and long distance band counselling from someone who really doesn’t know what he’s doing, he just wants to keep talking to Harry.

໑ peaches and soft myth by @outropeace (E, 36k, acquaintances to lovers, college au, grumpy/sunshine, practice kissing) “Greta kissed me,” he said at last. It wasn’t the main issue, but it was a start.

Louis’ smile was radiant. Eyes sparkling with genuine happiness. Harry’s stomach felt a little funny, wishing he could feel as happy as the cheerleader. "Oh, my god? We did it! I’m a genius ! Was it long? Slow and sensual, full of lust and passion, tongues intertwined—" he gasped. “Did she tremble in your arms?” He hugged himself.

“That’s not—”

“No one believes me when I say I am a good matchmaker. They are always like, ‘Oh Louis, you have the worst eye for couples and men. You always miss the real connections.’ Who missed now? Not me. Nuh-hu, I saw the potential. Your grumpy attitude did not deter me. I'm probably the greatest matchmaker on campus. Don’t you think?” Louis’ smile faltered. “Wait… why do you look as if you were about to throw up?”

“She told me her roommate leaves for a few days after spring break. She invited me to her dorm room.”

“Okay?” Louis said slowly. “Am I missing something? Is it about clothes? Because I can totally find something—”

Harry scrubbed a hand over his face. “It’s not about that.”

“Then what?”

“I…” Harry closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I’m a virgin.”

໑ don't be afraid to love (and love again) by localopa / @voulezloux (T, 83k, strangers to lovers, angst with happy ending, trans male character, read tags and author’s notes) the one where louis is trans and afraid, harry is cis and brave, and being 100% yourself is easier said than done.

— rare pairs —

໑ better latte than never by @disgruntledkittenface (harry/zayn, M, 1.4k, coworkers to lovers, puns, masturbation) Harry was looking forward to the coffee cart at work. Until the subject of the previous night's fantasies lined up next to him.

#28th appreciation #1dsource #1dsquad #hlcreators #hljournal #artistsof1d #1dficvillage #trackinghome #* #*rec #i forgot what day it was so have this a bit late <3

[beeshoesometimesdraws]

Getting back into Danny Phantom (one of my fav childhood shows that I haven’t watched in YEARS) and realizing and understanding things that I didn’t understand when I was a wee child

To this day I still love the concept of the show (and the—albeit prolly unintentional—trans allegory to it) and now my understanding of it and the depth of the “I have to hide my true identity but not to protect the people I care about but to protect myself from THEM” is something I can appreciate way more and it’s such an underrated and fuckin cool yet messed up and heartbreaking trope and I aajsjsjsnshdbdhdhfjcjnfjfjffj

#bee talks #danny phantom #I love this show sm yall don’t understand #I love the trans allegories of it #and I’m saying this as someone who is trans #and I love the concept and trope sm #bee rambles

[sinistersuns]

I hope more people who feel they’re leftists begin to realize that genuinely hating men AND/OR immediately assuming a man (or someone you perceive as a man) you don’t know is out to harm you is t3rf behavior. This belief will not keep you safe, it’s meant to isolate you and put the marginalized men around you in danger. Hating men will not do shit to the bigoted cishet white men in power, but it’ll tell the marginalized men around you that they aren’t welcome around you. This extends to anyone who looks like cis society’s idea of a man, but isn’t actually one, too - do y’all really think trans people of ANY gender say “okay I’m x gender now” and are immediately treated like that gender by society as a whole? Do you think your fear of anyone with facial hair and a deep voice will stop at dangerous cis men, and that only dangerous cis men have those traits? And I’m specifying DANGEROUS cis men because cis men as a group aren’t inherently dangerous. The way someone looks or identifies says nothing about whether they’re “safe” or not! I thought we fucking learned this!!

#I’m tired of being looked at like I’m a danger and I’m tired of nonpassing transfems being looked at like they’re dangerous #I can’t trust anyone who says they ‘hate men’ because I genuinely don’t know if y’all are joking or not anymore #I used to be someone who genuinely hated cis men because of how I’d been treated by them. but I cut that shit out when I realized how terfy #it is. and beyond that it isn’t fair to cis men as a whole and especially not marginalized cis men #having compassion for a group of people who’ve hurt or even traumatized you is hard. but you have to do it or you’re going to fall into #some form of bigotry that will only hurt the people you claim to support #TO BE CLEAR. ‘a group of people who hurt you’ doesn’t refer to bigoted groups like transphobes or racists etc etc #I’m specifically talking about neutral identities like gender #bigots can go die #transphobia #transmascphobia #transmisogyny #transgender #trans

[rubyscarbuncle]

I’m trans, and that’s so fucking awesome.

“Oughhh but I feel awful and I face constant discrimination” not to minimize that, but maybe that’s not where the story ends, maybe my life doesn’t have to be about the shitty parts, maybe my life doesn’t just have to be the hurdles I’m jumping over and the people that I’m stuck dealing with.

Maybe I can love that i am a part of something bigger, that I am a part of a group of people that would rather etch their true name on their tombstone than be someone they’re not. That I am someone who has deeply explored themselves as a person and is constantly changing and growing and loving myself in new ways and with a sincerity and exploration that no one else can in the same way. I’m constantly reinventing myself and enjoying the person, not only that I’m turning into but that I am right now, albeit with the challenges that come with it. And fuck anyone else.

I’ve been spending too long focusing on my anxieties and trying to “become” a girl or “pass” as a woman. Too long saying that I’m not enough as a girl until I pass or treating transness as this “condition” I’ve been straddled with that makes me worse off compared to a cis woman, but I’m me, and I’ll live and breathe and love life to my own tune, and I will die to that tune, and i don’t care who the fuck doesn’t jam to it because it’s not their life. I have been given this opportunity to love myself and claw a home into this body of mine by force if I have to, and that’s something I can always take pride in.

I’m trans, and that’s so so so fucking awesome

#trans #transgender #transgenderism #lgbtq #lgbtq+ #lgbt #and no this is not to minimize trans struggles or to say that those anxieties and fears and discrimination aren’t hard #or that they don’t sometimes make me miserable #but that not just in spite of it but regardless of it I want to continue to love myself and who i am and who i will turn into is awesome #and that I have more than enough permission to just be me #my voice and my body don’t dictate my happiness #and I can choose to love these things about myself no matter how someone else feels about them #or no matter how much they will make passing harder #I don’t give a shit #because I’m me and I’m trans and transgenderism will always live on no matter how much it attempts to be squashed and that’s so awesome

[r0semultiverse]

If there was ever a shadow of a doubt that Dragona is transgender, this chapter was sure as fuck confirmation! 👀

#pretty heavy depiction of transmisogyny #Jodio lighting that bus aflame was amazing; great kid & great brother #I think this was the first JJBA chapter that made me really truly uncomfortable but I say that as praise #this chapter rightfully was a difficult read because it depicted actual realistic transphobia #& this is just looking at the dragona joestar interactions through the lens of transness #I’m sure there’s someone far more educated who is talking about the racial parts of Jojolands & it’s depictions of cops & this chapter too #regardless of how dragona identifies this is absolutely the depiction of transmisogyny real people face; dragona is trans & this can be #denied no longer #mine #op #jojolands spoilers #dragona joestar #jjba part 9 #jojolands #jojo part 9 #jojo no kimyō na bōken #jojo’s bizarre adventure #jjba #jojo no kimyou na bouken #jjba spoilers

[shreddheir]

today is not a good brain day

#I’m not fucking evil for not supporting an animal abuser right. I can still call myself a trans ally and not support an animal abuser right #Right #ppl say “love all trans women no matter what” and I try but I don’t want to unconditionally support someone who would actually try and kill #My pets if she saw them. #It’s not transphobic to hate a girl who sees a picture of an irl animal and describes how she wants to rape it right #Because I feel like I’m being a bad ally

[ocpdzim]

another thing that’s really shitty about the recent uptick of people who call themselves allies still refusing to stop using “dude” and similar for trans women is that i thought we all agreed ages ago that we shouldn’t call people things they don’t want to be called even if it IS something you’d consider inoffensive to call a person under most circumstances. like seriously how hard is it to respond to “please don’t call me that” with “sorry, i won’t do it again” even and ESPECIALLY if you didn’t mean any harm when you first said it. if it’s a habit that’s hard to break just try your best and take a moment to apologize briefly when you fuck up, exactly like we’re always telling cis people to do with pronouns they’re not used to using. it’s really not that hard

#like i’m in circles where it’s common to use in a gender neutral way too but if you know someone is likely to be uncomfortable with it then #just say something else! for fucks sake. we all know a lot of trans women are uncomfortable w it bc they said so repeatedly #so just save it for people who are not trans women and/or trans women who told you they’re ok with it #similarly when i was growing up ‘young man’/‘young lady’ was considered a term of respect and/or formality for children. #like the children’s equivalent of calling an adult ‘sir’ or ‘ma’am’ #but these days it’s often used as a racist micro aggression so EVERYONE NEEDS TO TRY TO STOP WITH IT.

[starbuck]

not to moralize fiction (and i mean that unironically) but, as a trans person, when a character has a distinct birth name and chosen name and people opt to call them their birth name, i DO take notice of that and that it’s generally cis people who do it.

again, this isn’t me actually making any sort of moral judgement, i just think it’s interesting how chosen names are more likely to be inherently respected as sacred by trans people due to our real life experiences.

#and i’m not talking about characters who have a nickname but still go by their full name #i’m talking about characters who chose a new name and are no longer shown to identify with the old one #typically for some emotionally resonant reason #and these characters aren’t textually trans #but as a trans person i can still point to them and go ‘ah yeah - i get that!’ #and respecting it is important to me #not for the character’s sake (since they’re not real) but for how it reflects reality #when someone says ‘i go by this’ then that’s what i’m calling them #this is not only true of trans people #my cousin just changed his name and idk if he has or will have any sort of gender stuff going on #but i still took it just as seriously as a trans name change regardless #because it IS just as serious! #and i think that’s what got me thinking about this #again - i’m REALLY not trying to start anything here but i do think this is something to think about

[designernishiki]

i rarely see people talking about the trans girl substory in y3 and like. yakuza may have its issues with iffy representation here and there but I’ll give them credit for that one, it was simple but it was sweet and kiryu was very in character. my only question is: where the hell did kiryu learn the word transgender

#he already knew it for some reason and I’m not saying that’s super unrealistic but like let’s be real #SOMEONE had to have told him what it means at some point #im gonna assume ako did but they never use the Word in her earlier appearances I don’t think #anyway this substory is funny to me and very sweet #my friends and I were saying it’s like. the follow-up to rina (the lesbian hostess in y1) telling him he can go out with a guy if he wants #to (because he just admitted he wants to) and him going silent and staring at the ceiling in deep contemplation #the follow-up being: he meets another queer person who’s confiding in him and he almost immediately asks ‘so you’re trans. that’s not the #same thing as being gay right’ #like he asks her that in game. and it just sounds like he’s been wondering about this for a WHILE like it’s been lingering in the back of #his head just waiting for the right situation #man’s figuring some of his own shit out #as dumb as it sounds I like to think that was him thinking to himself ‘okay… they’re not the same thing… so IF im gay… it doesn’t make me #any less of a man than I was before…hypothetically’ #hdjdjffjfjvn but anyway obviously hc/speculation but hey it’s fun #that substory was written for us queers anyway. we can do what we want with if #rambling #kiryu #y3

[divine0]

If it was only asking to change a username, it would have fine, it’s just the way you handled things and other things that has popped up from you three has made a lot of people icky, but it’s not up to me to explain it to you, let the void news explain it

SORRY I DONT LIKE JOKING ABOUT SUICIDE AND MPREG AS IF ITS MY FUCKING FAULT !!

#as someone who has been suicidal i don’t think that making a very overt part of your blog about suicide #i don’t think that’s appropriate!! #and mpreg…. don’t even fucking get me started #are you just making a joke that men can get pregnant because the concept of a pregnant man is funny to you?? #do you also laugh when a trans man gets pregnant?? because that’s mpreg #is that fucking funny??? #sorry that i stopped being mature after a certain point #but tagging half the fandom here saying that i’m in the wrong along with my friends is EXTREEMLY INAPPROPRIATE #ask #anon #twomp

[mars-ipan]

y’know i think the most annoying thing about trying to discuss reproductive rights with cis people is the complete and utter refusal to include trans people in the discussion. like they will only ever say “women” and if you dare to point it out it’s “well this is all being done to control women” or “‘people with vaginas’/‘people assigned female at birth’ is way too wordy” it drives me fucking crazy

like first off do you seriously think that the people who seek to remove bodily autonomy from women have nothing against trans people. do you think they hold zero ill will towards us. also do you think they view trans afabs as anything other than women.

secondly. NOBODY IS ASKING YOU TO USE BIG WORDY PHRASES LITERALLY JUST SAY “PEOPLE” INSTEAD OF “WOMEN.” WE LITERALLY JUST DON’T WANT TO BE EXCLUDED FROM THIS BECAUSE WE ARE ALSO BEING HURT WE JUST WANT SOME GODDAMN SOLIDARITY IN THIS BITCH. LIKE ACTUALLY JUST FUCKING SAY “PEOPLE” IT SAVES EVERYONE FROM WEIRD LOOPHOLES AND ALSO ENFORCES THAT WOMEN ARE PEOPLE FOR FUCK’S SAKEEEEE

#marzirants #my mom would say shit like this sometimes and it drove me fucking insane every single time #with her i truly feel like i have to pick my battles #bc 90% of the time she fully understands where i’m coming from! she understood the weird nuances of my queer stuff way better than any other #cishet i’ve met. ESPECIALLY considering she’s in her 50s #but every now and again she says some shit that drives me up a WALLLLL #i remember once i was talking about the language around it #and my mom brings up that she ‘disagrees’ with saying like ‘people with uteruses’ or whatever #and this kinda surprised me (she tends to catch me off guard with it) so i had no actual explanation for her #but i tried anyways i was like ‘well trans folks are affected by this too so it’s important that we’re included in the language’ right #and THIS WOMAN. someone who i know would fucking lay down her life if it were the best way to keep me safe #SAYS TO ME. #‘well this issue is about women. it isn’t about being trans and i don’t think the discussion should be derailed to trans issues’ #WHAT????? W. WHAT HUH???? #first off. this bitch goes hand in hand with trans issues we are talking bodily autonomy that is a huge trans issue #second of all. WHO THE FUCK IS DERAILING????? WE’RE ON YOUR SIDE WE’RE LITERALLY ASKING TO BE INCLUDED IN THE FIGHT #WH??? BITCH???? #my mom is so fucking smart. but sometimes the cishet nonsense overrides her smartness and she says the dumbest shit i have ever heard #don’t tell her i said that she’d get mad at me. even tho it’s literally smth all cishets do