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inawickedlittletown · 7 hours

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You Can Find Me Where the Skies are Blue (BuckTommy fic) - 4/7

Summary:

Soulmates are rare. So rare that it's actually incredible that Buck has two soulmate couples in his life. Statistics tell him it's very unlikely for him to meet his soulmate. Of course, then he meets Tommy. Too bad it happens at the worst possible moment.

Canon compliant soulmate AU where Buck is still a mess and Tommy is still very understanding.

Words: 4,716

Ao3

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

Eddie’s Chevelle was gorgeous. Old cars just had something about them that gave them so much more character than anything more modern. She was in good condition, too, had probably spent little time out in the sun or other weather. Tommy was more than a little impressed.

He had Eddie drive her into the garage and right onto the lift even if he didn’t intend to lift her up just yet. Instead, he opened the hood. Eddie joined him.

“Car’s in great condition,” Tommy said.

“My Abuela kept it mostly in the garage with a cover. It actually belonged to my Abuelo and she couldn’t get rid of it. But once she decided to move back to Texas, she figured it was time and passed it to me.”

“I’m gonna take a quick look,” Tommy said. “See if I find anything that needs work.”

“Sure,” Eddie said, and when Tommy looked away from the car found that Eddie had started to wander.

Tommy didn’t mind. His garage doubled as his home gym and he was sure that a guy like Eddie might appreciate his set up from his mats to the bench press and his weights to the punching bag that Tommy had added most recently.

“I gotta say, you really got a nice set up here,” Eddie said, returning to where Tommy was tinkering with the car. “I’ve always wanted to do something at my place but I really don’t have the space.”

Eddie wasn’t wrong that the Chevelle needed a little bit of a tune up, but it really was in good condition. Whatever Eddie had been doing, he’d been keeping up with the maintenance.

“I got kind of tired of going to an actual gym,” Tommy said. “Between this and what we have at work I get all the exercise I need. Of course, there’s no machine or punching bag that can take the place of a real person for sparring.”

That seemed to catch Eddie’s interest. “Wait, do you do MMA?”

“Muay Thai,” Tommy supplied.

Eddie grinned at him. “I think you just found a sparring partner.”

“Yeah?”

“Absolutely,” Eddie said.

Tommy felt his excitement too.

By the time that Eddie left, his car’s engine sounded better than it had when it arrived and Tommy was left behind just a little bit sweatier with the satisfaction of having taken Eddie down. The singular thing that brought him down was knowing that Evan had yet to answer his text.

Tommy didn’t want to be pushy. He didn’t want to overwhelm Evan. He figured he’d give him until the start of his shift and then text him again. If that failed, then there was always Wednesday night.

Before Eddie left, Tommy had made a point of inviting him out to the bar for karaoke night. He had also made a point of insisting that Eddie invite Hen and Chim and of course Evan and even Bobby if Bobby could be persuaded to show up. Significant others welcome too. It’d be nice to see everyone again of course, but his real goal was Evan. In that setting, Tommy would find some way to get him off to the side and then they could really talk or make plans to talk. Whatever worked, The point was seeing him again and Tommy was not above making it happen in a roundabout way.

Eddie had been happy to agree and he’d also gotten Tommy to agree to go with him to a pick up basketball game that some firefighters had put together. Tommy figured it’d be fun.

After a shower to wash off the sweat, Tommy finally dealt with Lucy, calling her because that seemed a lot easier.

She picked up after one ring. “Evan Buckley,” she said.

“Yeah. Evan Buckley.”

Lucy laughed. “I’m actually…the more I’ve thought about it the more I kinda see it. I just had no idea Buck swung that way. Not that it ever came up. He had a girlfriend when I worked with him. That chick that wrote that book about firefighters that kinda blew up for a minute.”

Tommy could picture the book in his mind. He remembered it because it had been literally everywhere. Someone had even brought a few copies into Harbor. There was still some kind of ongoing legal battle about it from LAFD’s end which was kinda hilarious.

“He dated that woman?” Tommy asked.

“Yeah…I know,” Lucy said. “I don’t think even he liked her very much. I mean…he kinda cheated on her.”

“And you know this how?” Tommy asked. His heart was racing.

“Because on the night I met Buck we got really drunk of tequila and maybe we got a bit flirty and he never told me he had a girlfriend and I kissed him. I wanted…well, I wanted you to know. We never really talked about it and it never happened again.”

“Did you want it to?”

Lucy let out a sigh. “Yes. No. He’s hot, can you blame me? The point is he never pursued it and I backed off. And we were really drunk. And now he’s your soulmate.”

“And he’s straight,” Tommy said. “Might mean you still have a shot.” He hated the words even as he said them.

Maybe it was a result of being deep in the closet and not getting to experience any real firsts until his late twenties — and even then it hadn’t been out in the open — but Tommy had never gotten good at telling when someone was queer unless they were being very loud about it. He’d always been a little shocked when approached by a guy that clocked him because Tommy didn’t think he ever really gave that vibe. So, he really had no idea when it came to Evan. Except that he was his soulmate.

“You don’t know that,” Lucy said. “Just because he’s only been with women in the past…”

“Soulmates are not always romantic,” Tommy said.

“You don’t know that,” Lucy said.

“Lucy,” Tommy said. “That’s…no, just look at the numbers. There are plenty of platonic soulmates. If that is what Evan and I are then that’s fine too. I’ve been realizing lately just how lonely I really am.”

It was true. Between not having anyone to really tell about finding his soulmate and finding so much enjoyment in hanging out with Eddie and the way that he did feel a little bit like he’d missed out on something when he left the 118, Tommy had realized that he had sort of settled for being on his own. It wasn’t that he hated it, but it did get lonely. He knew Evan would change that — they were soulmates after all — it was just that Tommy didn’t want to put all of that on Evan. The pressure of meaning absolutely everything.

“However this turns out,” Lucy said, “I got your back, Kinard.”

—

Buck spent the first hour on shift trying his hardest to keep from asking Eddie about how the night before had gone with Tommy. He’d seen the text from Tommy when he woke up that morning, had felt warm reading it and realizing that Tommy really was interested in getting to know him and yet he hadn’t known what to text back. As rude as it felt to just leave it, he figured he would respond sometime during the day and that Tommy would just have to wait. Maybe it was a little bit petty too, but Buck didn’t care.

When he saw Eddie in the locker room he almost asked then, but held himself back. He was grateful to Ravi asking Chim questions about the wedding. It had also kept Hen from making any comments, though Buck had caught her making eyes at him a few times once they were all up on the loft like she was trying to communicate to Buck that they should talk.

When he couldn’t hold it in any longer, they were on a call. It was only him, Eddie, and Ravi because Hen and Chim had gone as an additional RA to another scene. It felt like the right time and place to bring it up.

“Uh. Hey, you never said. How was Vegas?” Buck ventured to ask.

“Quick trip,” Eddie said as if it was the type of thing that he did normally when Buck knew for a fact it wasn’t.

“I’ll bet. How long does it take to chopper there?”

“One hour,” Eddie said.

“You took a chopper to Vegas?” Ravi asked.

“And how was the fight?” Buck asked, ignoring Ravi.

“Fight was okay. Seats were amazing. Tommy’s buddies with the promoter so we were ringside. Felt like I was the one throwing the punches.”

Maybe it would have been fun to be there, but it really wasn’t Buck’s thing. He didn’t see the appeal to watching two people try to pummel each other.

“Who’s Tommy?” he heard Ravi ask.

My soulmate, Buck wanted to answer. He held it in. He felt a bit foolish maybe or embarrassed that he hadn’t told Eddie. Not that they’d had any time to talk lately. He didn’t want to just drop the information while walking into a restaurant for a call that dispatch hadn’t been sure wasn’t a prank.

As it turned out, it wasn’t a prank. They called it in to dispatch even though the restaurant manager had already called the police. Ravi had gone down there and Buck wanted to continue the conversation.

“I’m not surprised you had a great time in Vegas,” Buck ventured. “You and Tommy have a lot of things in common. Both in the Army. Both like watching half naked men pummel each other.”

As he listed it, it also dawned on him that he and Tommy didn’t have those things in common and maybe not even other things. He knew, logically, that people could have different interests. Buck and Eddie were good friends and they weren’t into the same things. Chim and Maddie had their own hobbies too. And though he could have very long discussions about cosmic things revolving black holes and time dilation and why exactly Pluto wasn’t a planet with Karen, Hen tended to just tune them out. Still, it left something of a bad taste in his mouth to know that Eddie and Tommy had bonded that much when he hadn’t even gotten a chance.

“Tommy’s pretty cool,” Eddie said. “It’s been a while since I met someone who can go toe to toe with me in muay thai.”

That caught Buck short. How many times had Eddie hung out with Tommy? They did all meet the same night right? He wasn’t crazy to feel like things weren’t adding up. He hated the way that it twisted at his gut, how it made him feel uncomfortable.

“Uh, you guys went to muay thai together?”

“He’s got a set up in his garage. We sparred a bit when I took the Chevelle over.”

“You…you took the Chevelle over?” Buck asked and he hoped his voice didn’t give away his feelings.

Eddie had even gone over to Tommy’s? When had Eddie even had the time? It had barely been a whole week since they met Tommy.

“Yeah, he’s got a car lift. The guy really knows his engines. You should hear that thing purr now.”

Buck had seen the Chevelle all of twice since Eddie took custody of it. It was a beautiful car, well preserved for its age. He’d sat in the passenger seat while Eddie drove them around and while he’d appreciated the car, it hadn’t really held his interest. He’d never been much of a car guy.

After his Jeep was flooded during the hurricane, he’d just gone through the process of replacing it through insurance. He hadn’t even thought about getting a different car. He only really had a Jeep in the first place since Maddie had given him her Jeep as a way to escape their parents. That car had gotten him pretty far until Buck sold it and used the money to travel down to South America. When he moved back and needed a car, he’d just figured a Jeep would do and he’d stuck to that ever since.

They checked in with Ravi, and Buck was so glad that he wasn’t the one down there, though maybe it would have been preferable to talking to Eddie about Tommy.

“Well, listen, I — I think it’s great,” Buck said and maybe it was. He did want his best friend and his soulmate to get along. “You know, you can’t have enough friends right?”

“Right,” Eddie said. “You know, it’s like that thing when you meet somebody and you just click. You know what I mean? Kinda like the soulmate thing. You meet someone and you just know you want them in your life or however it is that works.”

Buck felt like his stomach give a turn.

“I do,” Buck said. “I really do.”

The feeling in his stomach, the churning and twisting intensified. He knew exactly what it felt like, the instant connection that Eddie was talking about and it was so much more than the bond between two people that had similar hobbies. It didn’t change that Buck downright hated it. How dare Eddie just swoop in and become more interesting to Buck’s own soulmate?

“So, when do you think you’ll see him again?” Buck ventured to ask, hoping that Eddie didn’t already have plans with Tommy.

“He’s got this Karaoke bar trivia thing on Wednesday,” Eddie said.

Buck saw an opening. He was ready to invite himself along. The words were ready, but Eddie spoke first.

“Hey, what are you doing Wednesday?” Eddie asked and Buck felt hopeful because if Eddie invited him along then he and Tommy could possibly get some time to talk. It’d be perfect.

“Me? Uh, yeah, no I’m free. Totally free Wednesday.”

“Do you think you could watch Christopher for me?”

Disappointment hit him almost exactly like the guy they were rescuing had been hit. A car driving too fast with a driver too irresponsible to accept consequences. Eddie was the driver and he’d just swept Buck into a sewer. When he agreed, it felt like resignation. This was Buck’s role…the babysitter while Eddie went out and had fun with Buck’s very own soulmate. He knew that if he said something about Tommy being his soulmate that Eddie would back off, but Buck didn’t want that. He didn’t want to get to Tommy because Eddie canceled their plans not to mention that he didn’t want to tell Eddie this way.

When they got back to the 118, Buck didn’t stick around to talk to Eddie. He found Bobby cooking and after the weeks where he’d been gone on that cruise, it was a very welcome sight. This was where Bobby belonged.

“You alright, Buck?” Bobby asked.

Of course he could tell that something was up. It was something of Bobby’s superpower. One of the things that made him an amazing Captain and maybe what had drawn Buck to open up to him.

“What do you think about soulmates?” Buck asked.

“Soulmates,” Bobby said. “I guess it isn’t something we’ve ever discussed. What brings this on?”

“Just…I guess I was thinking about it. Was, uh, wondering what you thought about it.”

“Is this another one of your late night research things?” Bobby asked with an amused smile.

Buck shrugged. “I guess it’s just interesting…like the idea that two people could ever just fit that well together. I was reading about Plato’s Symposium because that’s one of the earliest things we have about explaining it even though there’s so many records that were kept about people meeting their soulmates. It’s why there can even be a claim about how fewer soulmate meetings there are. In the Symposium, Aristophane explains love and soulmates like the gods splitting souls in half as a punishment for humanity. So we walk around trying to find the other half of our souls to then finally become complete.”

“That’s interesting,” Bobby said. “It’s a little mythical. A story.”

“Well, yeah,” Buck said, “but soulmates are real even if only a portion of the population ever manages to find their soulmates.”

Bobby nodded, thoughtfully. “There are stories within every culture and within many religions. Some people put more meaning to it, but I don’t think not being soulmates with someone devalues that relationship.”

“I know,” Buck said. “You and Athena…it’s amazing.”

“It isn’t perfect,” Bobby said. “All relationships need work. Even when you are soulmates. What else did you find?”

Research was what he did when he was worrying about something. Information was everything to Buck. He loved talking about the things he found and everyone at the 118 had been subjected to Buck’s info dumps. Sometimes, if relevant, he could even bring things up during calls.

“Well, I started to look at platonic soulmates,” Buck said.

Bobby looked a bit taken aback. “Platonic soulmates,” he repeated.

“Yeah,” Buck said, letting out a nervous breath. “Most of them are same sex soulmates. Which I think is a bit of historical erasure to keep everything heterosexual. But I guess it does happen. There are a few these days that say they’re platonic…I just wondered about it like how if you find your soulmate, there is no way any other relationship could ever mean as much, could it?”

Bobby smiled at him. “I think every friendship and every relationship is different for everyone, Buck. We each have a lot of love to give.”

“Yeah,” Buck said.

“I guess think about it like this,” Bobby said, “Chimney and Maddie are soulmates and things haven’t been perfect for them. They love each other. They also both love Jee and the love they each hold for their daughter is not diminished because they are soulmates. So yes, maybe it is possible that someone can find their soulmate and still lead a romantic relationship with someone else.”

Buck hadn’t thought about it that way. He realized it was different. A parent’s love was different, but Bobby did have a point. Somehow he still felt just a little strange at the thought that Tommy could be his soulmate and still have a girlfriend or a wife…that Buck could do the same. Something about it felt wrong, he just had no idea why.

“Why is it you’re worrying about this?” Bobby asked.

Bobby really did know him too well. It wasn’t that Buck hadn’t intended to tell Bobby, it was that he was still trying to figure it all out for himself. But maybe that was part of the problem, Buck needed to communicate more.

“I met my soulmate, Bobby,” Buck said.

“Buck, that’s great,” Bobby said.

“I don’t know,” Buck said. “I thought so at first, but I just…it’s a dude and I mean, this has to be platonic, right? I’m not…I love women. Not that it even matters maybe because he’s busy hanging out with someone else.”

“Ah,” Bobby said. “It’s still a good thing, Buck. You found your soulmate…whatever that looks like for the two of you, I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks, Bobby. I just hate not knowing.”

“Not knowing?”

“We’ve barely talked. I just want…I guess I just want all of this to be figured out already.”

Bobby chuckled. “Buck, you know by now that nothing works like that.”

Buck sighed. He dropped his head. “This should be the easy thing, though, shouldn’t it be?”

“Eventually it might very well be.”

Buck wanted nothing more than to hold onto that.

—

Wednesday night, Tommy took a little longer than usual getting ready. He went through a few different shirts until finally settling on a blue henley, threw on a brown leather jacket over it and touched up his hair. He hoped he didn’t look like he was trying too hard. It was just that things hadn’t exactly gone right the first time he and Evan got together after their first meeting. His fault entirely. Looking back, Tommy should have pushed that meeting to a day when he didn’t already have plans even if it meant waiting a little longer to see him.

Eddie had never confirmed whether Evan was coming, but when they texted earlier, Tommy had reiterated that Eddie should invite Evan, Hen, and Chim along. Eddie had only sent back a thumbs up, but Tommy was hopeful. After all, he had finally gotten a response from Evan.

Evan: Thank you for the message. I hope we can get that beer soon whenever you’re not busy.

Tommy took it to mean that maybe Evan was coming along with Eddie, but that he didn’t want to say it outright. So, he took a bit of extra time on his appearance and then he left for the bar a bit on the early side. He was excited, not nervous.

Tommy had thought about inviting Lucy along, especially since she already knew everyone. Except that she would be a menace when it came to him and Evan and neither of them needed that. Hen knew about it, he had yet to text her back after her message of congratulations but maybe that was another reason to see her in person. Tommy was also pretty sure that Eddie had no idea. Since Chim hadn’t reached out, it also figured it was unlikely that he was aware. Tommy did find it a little curious that despite Eddie claiming to be Evan’s best friend, Evan hadn’t told him about finding his soulmate.

Wednesday nights with the karaoke aspects meant that the bar was a little busier. The girl setting up the karaoke machine already had her sign up sheet out and a few people had signed up to sing. Tommy didn’t know if he would. He wasn’t exactly the best singer, but that wasn’t the point of karaoke and it had never stopped him in the past. It was just that…well, he didn’t want to make an ass of himself in front of Evan.

Eddie arrived some fifteen minutes later, completely on his own.

“Hey, man,” he said and they bumped fists before Eddie sat down. “Didn’t get a drink yet? I’ll get us a couple of beers.”

“Uh, sure,” Tommy said and he didn’t pretend that he didn’t look towards the door to see if Evan would walk in. He perked up every time the door opened, but it wasn’t anyone from the 118.

When Eddie got back, he had two bottles in hand and the waitress behind him brought over two shots of some yellow looking liquid.

“Courage to get us singing,” Eddie said with a grin.

After the waitress left they lifted the shot glasses and downed them in one. Whatever Eddie had picked, it was both sweet and very very alcoholic. Tommy coughed afterwards and he thought that Eddie’s eyes were watering.

“What was that?”

“No idea,” Eddie said. “It had a funny name.”

Tommy laughed. “Next time, stick to vodka or rum.”

“Not tequila?”

“I can’t say I’m a fan of the aftermath.”

Eddie laughed.

Tommy gave it some time. Eddie started telling him about the call they’d had the day before with a guy needing to be rescued from the sewer. Tommy had missed the weird and crazy things that you got called to as a firefighter or paramedic. As a pilot, he spent more time flying than doing any of the rescuing and sometimes he did miss being part of the action instead of just being a part of the transport.

“Hey, is anyone else coming?” Tommy asked when enough time had gone by.

“Oh. Hen and Karen are taking in a foster kid soon so they had a meeting with someone. Chim is busy with wedding planning.”

“And what about Evan?”

“Buck? Oh…he’s actually watching Christopher.”

It took a moment for it to sink in. Eddie was taking a gulp of his drink and his attention was on the stage where the mic was being set up. Lights shone down in multiple colors. Any minute now they would start with the first on the list. There was a small crowd gathering over the folder that held the list of songs available.

Evan wasn’t coming.

Tommy was more than a little disappointed.

Evan wasn’t coming because Eddie had him babysitting his kid. Tommy didn’t want to be there anymore. The whole night…it felt pointless. He’d gone through so many shirts for the possibility of seeing Evan and even though Eddie had never said he was coming, Tommy had sort of told himself that of course Evan would. He’d wanted to see Hen and Chim too, maybe not as much as Evan, but he had definitely wanted to see them.

There was one other thing, though. Tommy knew he couldn’t blame Eddie…it was just that with the other day and the fight he had no idea what this might look like to Evan.

“Did Evan know this was why he’s babysitting?” Tommy asked. “Us going out tonight?”

“Yeah,” Eddie said. “I mentioned it. He was happy to babysit. Didn’t have anything else going on.”

Eddie was absolutely clueless.

Evan’s text from earlier suddenly had an entirely different connotation and Tommy knew he had a choice. He could stay and hang out with Eddie and spend the whole night thinking about Evan…or he could fix it.

“I really was looking forward to seeing everyone,” Tommy said. “That's why I suggested this in the first place.”

“Oh,” Eddie said.

“In fact, there is someone that I actually really do have to see tonight. Right now, in fact.”

“What are you talking about?” Eddie asked.

Tommy didn’t know how Evan would feel about it, but it was his truth to tell as well. So, he looked straight at Eddie.

“I met my soulmate and I need to see him tonight.”

“You met your soulmate,” Eddie said, awe in his voice. “That’s awesome. So why are you here right now? Hell, if I’d met my soulmate I wouldn’t be out with anyone else.”

Tommy chuckled. “Because I was counting on him being here.”

“Him,” Eddie said and Tommy could see his mind trying to fixate that to what he knew about Tommy.

“Yes. Is that a problem, Eddie?”

“No,” Eddie said immediately. “No. Of course not. I just didn’t realize you were…gay? Bi?”

“Gay,” Tommy said.

Eddie nodded. “Alright. Yeah, no problem with that.”

Tommy sighed. He didn’t want to correct Eddie on what Tommy’s soulmate bond might be, but he did like how easily Eddie just took Tommy coming out to him.

“So I need you to do me a favor, Eddie.”

“Yeah, anything,” Eddie said. “Though I don’t know how I can help.”

Tommy chuckled. “I need you to drive us to your house.”

“Tommy that—”

“I just need you to drive us or give me your address so I can take an uber there.”

“But why do you need to go to my house?”

Tommy just stared at him. Eddie raised his bottle to his lips and he was drinking when it seemed to start to click. Tommy didn’t have time for it, though.

“We need to go to your house so you can stay with your kid and I can talk to Evan,” Tommy said

Eddie still didn’t seem to connect the dots. “Why would you need to talk to Buck?”

“Maybe because Evan is my soulmate,” Tommy said. “And when I asked you to invite him and the others tonight it was so that I could talk to him. But now he’s babysitting and I’m hanging out with you. So I need to talk to Evan,”

As Eddie finally came to the right conclusion. His mouth opening into an “oh” of surprise.

“You see, I’ve kinda left him before to hang out with you so…”

“So you gotta talk to Buck,” Eddie said.

Eddie took care of their tab and meanwhile two skinny girls had made it onto the stage as the first ones to take on a song. They were giggling nervously, clearly not drunk enough yet. He and Eddie walked out of the bar as the first notes were starting.

“Wait,” Eddie said once they were in the parking lot.

“Yes?”

“But Buck isn’t gay,” Eddie said.

Tommy could have face palmed.

#911 abc #911 fic #bucktommy #bucktommy fic #tommy kinard #evan buckley #kinley #tevan #kinley fic #tevan fic #you can find me where the skies are blue

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supercalime · 23 days

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Just thought about sharing this frame right here

Do with it what you will

#the split second before the lips touch are always my favorite part to analyze like a psycho #sorry about the motion blur #this was a bitch to screenshot but I had to #for science #also can you tell that I really like Tommy and buck together and want them to be endgame?#I’ll hide the next bit in the tags cause some shippers are scary:#I don’t really want buddie to happen #im not against it but there is something about eddies actor #that makes me feel like he’s one of those bros is fine with gay people but not near him #and this is purely my own impression #I don’t think he said or done anything to give that impression #you know how there are certain actors who simply refuse to kiss men because of fragile masculinity #because I’m straight bro #anyway #Back to Tommy and buck #I really like them together and they better have at least one kiss as intense as buck had with other partners in the past #not just a peck like last week to get diversity points #ya know #shmexy kisses #lety rambles #tuck #bucktommy #evan buckley #tommy kinard #911 #911 abc #oliver stark #lou ferrigno jr

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thegunslingerletmedrop · 19 days

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Hi, I'm @thegunslingerletmedrop and welcome to my TommyTalk.

Guys, it's been great. The discourse is fun. We're all happy. We're all hopeful. We're all trash for Tommy Kinard.

This guy took Evan Buckley out. And you know what? Buck said "we picked a place" but I bet that was more Tommy laid out some safe options, guessing full well that Buck would choose the most out of the way spot. And he was cool with that. Like, he said oh I know why you went with this place but it's cool bc their food is great and that's what matters.

And then he doesn't want to choose the movie for them. He wants to go into this together, wants to know what Buck finds interesting. And so he gives Buck 18 screens with every type of genre so that 1) Buck has a good time and 2) Buck will be comfortable.

Then comes the Bucked moment and you can tell he's disappointed. He even tsks like he's marked a 'too bad' note next to Evan Buckley's crossed out name. But hey, no harm no foul. Better sooner than later.

And then he gets a call from Buck and he's not harboring bad feelings so he doesn't say no. Then he shows up and this guy. This guy, right here, doesn't make a move to sit down. Because they're in a super public spot probably not far off the beaten path and as far as he knows, this isn't a date. It's probably an apology meeting that he doesn't really need but figures Buck does.

He only sits when Buck motions for him too. And then he of course lets Buck know that he doesn't want to pressure him into anything. And then the tables turn and Evan is taking Eddie's advice and does a Buck. He goes all in. He asks the crazy question of going to Maddie's wedding with him.

And a beautiful thing happens. Tommy Kinard is stunned, and off balance, and very clearly tempering his expectations (which he will have to get used to if he sticks with Buck). But you also notice he hesitates. It's not a fast 'okay'. And part of it is not being sure if Evan really means it and another part is holding back because this feels a little reckless.

He looks like he wants to say no but when Buck is being earnest, there's something about Buck that is just so irresistible and sweet that even though he would say no to anyone else, he lets himself say yes in this moment. What the hell, right?

All this to say, I stan Tommy Kinard and want him to be happy. And if he ends up leaving I will clown for him forever.

#tommy kinard #911 abc #bucktommy truther #evan buckley #bucktommy #tevan #kinkley #buck x tommy #911 spoilers

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matan4il · 27 days

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911 ep 704 first watch reactions

IDK if anyone else will talk about this, but Josh and Maddie were a great comedic start to this ep! XD Also. Interesting choice to give Josh, the currently only openly gay male character on the show, more lines again. Is it a reminder he's there, so he can be a part of Buck's journey later on? *eyes emoji* We'll see.

All of these pretty women (I should also mention that as a non-American, all the gasped, "It's Joey!" "It's you!" "It's me!" are missing me by a kilometer. Whoever Joey is, he's not Madonna yet, if you want me to get excited about him, 911, you're gonna have to give me a bit more than a single name), hitting on Buck and Eddie, and the ease with which both men turn them down... Sure, this is a part of the set up regarding Buck, and Eddie technically has an excuse, but also. Most straight, taken men would at least be tempted. They'd at least bite their lips with frustration. Have some reaction. But not Eddie. And when you remember that he was distinctly not taken in ep 204, but still had the same reaction to pretty young women hitting on him and Buck... I know this ep is all about celebrating the 'oh' moment of another guy, but that's not gonna stop me from rooting for Eddie to have similar realizations eventually (and get together with that certain other guy *cough*).

LMAO So, Buck is meeting up with the guy who's gonna be his sexual awakening, a man who's good looking, gave him a thrill already, is an impressive fighter pilot, and the first thing he can think of to say, is blurt out Eddie's name? LMAO Oh, this boy really is down bad...

Man, that bit where Tommy tells Buck he can have it both ways, he can get certified and continue to serve with the 118. Thanks for the beautiful foreshadowing, 911. Buck saying he's keeping his options fluid... Holy shit, the show really wasn't holding any punches back.

OMG, why is Harry old enough to be making Bathena waffles (and then turn out to be involved in an altercation)? I swear, he was still on baby formula just a second ago. How did 7 seasons just fly by!?

Buck getting jealous over Eddie and Tommy sparring. Considering the fact that Buck was the one getting all hot and bothered over semi-naked Eddie in the gym in 201, and ready to jump into a boxing match with him, this is making me wanna punch a wall myself. The symbolism in this ep is NOT very veiled. Add to that Eddie mentioning how he and Tommy met and just... clicked. In the same conversation that reminds us of Buddie' in 201's first meeting, where they clicked? (even though they were both too dumb to realize in what way) 911, just let me catch my breath for a second challenge! Also, Eddie is dating Tommy more intensely than he is Marisol? Okay. Duly noted. These firefighters are both so freaking hetero, I'm sure that's exactly what every casual viewer was telling themselves at this point. And poor Buck, getting his hopes up that Eddie is asking him when he's free, so they can go on a date themselves, only to be let down. Poor baby boy. But this feels like it's spelling out the answer to whether Buck's jealous over Tommy or Eddie. So, yay for Tommy helping him with his bi awakening. But it's clear who's really occupying Buck's heart and mind, and whose time he wants. FOR SIX FREAKING SEASONS NOW.

Oh, it's continuing, the show really is trying to kill me, having Buck complain to Maddie about how often Eddie has been seeing Tommy. The annoyance with how cool Tommy is, that's exactly Buck's reaction to Eddie in 201. So, if Buck and Tommy will then kiss, what does that say about what Buck didn't even realize he wanted to happen with Eddie back then, hmmm? I also love that Buck wants to be the cooler "dad's friend" in Christopher's eyes. That's his son, you can't take that away from him. And of course, Maddie was his first confidante about his feels for Eddie, she was the first one to call out his boy crush (in 204) and to hear Buck automatically think about Eddie, when he hears, "He's cute!" (in 206). It's so freaking right that she is now the witness to Buck's bi jealousy meltdown. I love her calling him out on it. "Is it circled with a heart around it?" Honestly, this is better than front row seats at the Bachelor mansion. I'm just disappointed in Chimney and his imaginary popcorn that he doesn't get to witness all of this firsthand and get what it means. Letting down all Bachelor fans out there, Chim. -_-

And then Buck's back in the gym, staring at Eddie, feathers ruffled. Am I going to make it to the end of this ep? Who cares? This is fantastic! XD He tries to catch Eddie's attention with the little weightlifting without a spotter stunt, and it's specifically him. Chim turned out to also be impressed by how cool Tommy is, but Buck is circling Eddie, like a clueless Jane Austen heroine, about to become a hit teen romance movie. Ravi falling for Buck's weightlifting attention trap is just getting in the way. Chim asking about Buck's weird basketball hugging session is nothing but a way to get to the ball game with Eddie. Okay, I'm at the point where I need to be chewing on imaginary popcorn.

Athena is one of the strongest characters on television, ever. Precisely because she's not just tough when she has to be, she has a heart, too. The scene where she told the woman she accidentally killed her own son was hard to just watch. IDK how she actually did that. I'm not sure if viewers who aren't moms get it, 'coz I didn't until I went with my sister through her pregnancy. Motherhood changes you forever. You feel your kid moving inside you. You bond with them in the most intimate way possible before they're even born. You go on a wild journey with them after, where every second counts, let alone every hour and every day, when they're hungry, when they're cold, when they struggle to sleep, when they finally do, when they take their first step, when they fail and fall... The love and protectiveness are something different to anything else in life. IDK how Athena, who gets all of this, managed to break the news to this mother, that she had unknowingly killed her own kid. I think to me, this has to be the most devastating scene in the entire history of the show. IDK if I'll be able to watch it again.

When basketball game scene starts, and Chimney knows something's up, I was already chuckling. But then Eddie sees them, and the first thing isn't expressing joy that his best friend is there, it's asking how did Chim talk him into this. "He always says no to me." They BOTH always talk about each other in romantic coded language, it's not just Buck, and in the same ep where we get bi Buck confirmed, that makes me froth at the mouth...

"So I'm your basketball beard. I feel so bonded." Not Chimney calling Buck out, while using the term for closeted gay guys using someone as a cover. I AM SCREAMING. Thank you, 911 gods!

That montage with Eddie and Tommy high fiving each other right in front of Buck's salad face, while their muscles glisten in the sun, and Top Gun-like music plays in the background, like the biggest nod to the volleyball scene from that gayest movie ever made, which we already had Buddie paraphrasing in 201. I am fine, this is fine. I love this burning kitchen I'm sitting in.

Buck causing Eddie's injury because of his jealousy (which again, is not about Tommy. He made an impression on Chim as well, who was screaming, "Buck, I'm open! I'm OPEN!") and not even getting to offer some help, because Tommy's already on it... I hope ABC is happy with their viewership dropping next week, because they've killed every Buddie shipper in the fandom.

"Well, I'm not a 14 year old girl..." Both Buck and Maddie together: "So stop acting like one." Love this scene, love these siblings, love that the reference with the two blonde Sarahs sounds platonic, but it's also from a past season on the Bachelor. 911 really wants you to know this is romantic, and Buck's going through a late sexual awakening in his 30's, instead of in his teens, even before he's able to see it.

So, the conclusion to Buck and Maddie's convo is that he needs to talk to Eddie, to make it better, yet the person he ends up talking to is Tommy, and that leads to the bi awakening kiss... It's a classic rom com switch, we hear a knock at the door, we expect it to be THE love interest, showing up at the right time, and it's someone else, making the protagonist's romantic journey so close, but about to get longer. It's further emphasized by a shot over Tommy's shoulder, in a way that he can easily be confused for Eddie, and which is reminiscent of moment when we saw Buck standing at Eddie's door, or both of them there toegther.

It was a nice talk, I loved Tommy saying he can't replace Buck, I def noticed how he went to talk about it in the context of Chris instead of Eddie (hmmm... I wonder why), but my fave part was how Buck glowed when he heard his son doesn't shut up about him. ^u^ He even took a second to look away from Tommy, to take it in with a huge grin. Then Buck and Tommy start warming up to each other, moving towards flirtation, and what comes out of Buck's mouth? "You don't have to tell me how great Eddie is." That's not how you flirt with a guy, Buck. I liked Tommy kissing him, and Buck not recoiling. Like he's always known on some level, but could never do anything about it. "That's better than fake mouth static." LOL The stuff that great romance is made of.

I'm SO happy Buck is getting this storyline of realization he's bi, I've thought it would be important and that the show has laid some groundwork for it since 107, and I don't mind that Tommy is the "romantic other" who helps him with it. I do believe this is important bi representation in and of itself, away from Buddie, and if nothing else ever comes of it, this is still beyond wonderful. In 2024, we still barely have any characters who start out presumed straight, and are allowed the freedom to figure out that maybe their sexual orientation is different than what they thought, despite the fact that in reality, human sexuality is complex and confusing and a mess. So this really matters to me, as a human being, and as a queer person. That said, I can't ignore the past 5 seasons, and the way this storyline played out, with Tommy kissing Buck, but the whole thing being emotionally centered around Buck's feelings for Eddie, it means that whether they go canon or not (and at this point, I find it hard to believe they'd make Buck canonically bi, taking this HUGE risk of homophobic backlash, and not go there with him and Eddie, but just in case they don't, I wanna say this), it'll always be Buddie for me.

Thank you for reading! If you're looking for more, you can find my s7 reactions tag here, and more of my Buddie meta and content in my pinned post. xoxox

#911 spoilers #911 #911 abc #911abc #911 on abc #911onabc #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911 meta #chimney han #maddie buckley #bobby nash #athena grant #911reactions #9-1-1 #bathena #madney #118 firefam #fire family

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canonicallyobserving911 · 1 month

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Buck & Eddie: 7x4 and 7x5 stills in episode order???

When the two separate synopses were released for 7x4, I wondered how 9-1-1 was going to fit everything into the episode that was released via the BTS stills but then I realized they wouldn't be able to especially since the length of each one (without advertisements) is only 42 to 45 minutes. Also, it appears there will be three main storylines, i.e. Athena and Harry, Hen's life changing news and Buck being bothered and bewildered.

After considering all of the information that's been released, a few days ago, I figured the stills of Buck and Eddie in Buck’s loft, the ones of them talking in the firehouse gym and the one of Eddie and Bobby's conversation wouldn't be included in 7x4. Additionally, I remembered the way 3x5 "Rage" ended with Buck and Eddie still on the outs and they didn't reconcile until the end of 3x6 "Monsters" when Buck made Eddie talk to him. With OS recently commenting on someone's IG post about how the two pictures of Buck and Eddie in the loft are from 7x5, it added confirmation to my analysis.

Since I'm a visual person, I like to see things in their totality instead of in increments the way the BTS pics have been released. Therefore, I've put all the stills together in a way that IMO, could be how they'll play out during each episode and there's one picture of Buck by himself that was released but I believe it deals with something else. I've included it at the end because I'm going to do a separate post on it.

Before I delve into this, here's my UNPOPULAR OPINION. I ship Buddie and only Buddie but I have to admit, I'm not really excited about this storyline because IMO, the audience has seen it before in 3x5 and 3x6 when Eddie was temporarily partnered with Lena (post linked here). Sure, he didn't leave the 118 but Eddie did have a new work partner who Buck was clearly not happy about. Also, even though Eddie didn't tell Buck about her, it was evident by Buck's reaction, he was in fact jealous since he thought he was being replaced and it seemed to be part of the reason why he filed the lawsuit (not the only reason but part of it). Reminder, he was ok with being the Fire Marshall until he heard Lena call Eddie's name in 3x4 then once he saw her, he asked Bobby, "You replaced me?"

At this point, in six years, I hoped Buck and Eddie would be at a place in their partnership where they can actually discuss things like adults instead of Buck lashing out. Please don't misunderstand me because I get it, Buck's worried about being abandoned again so it's understandable and this time he doesn't have anyone to cling to. But if they would let him go back to therapy like he went on his own in season 4, maybe he could spend time working on himself and this storyline could have been avoided. Will I change my mind before Thursday... honestly, I'm not sure.

Back to the regularly schedule program...

7x4 "Buck, Bothered and Bewildered"

Based on the look on Buck's face in the stills from them at Air Rescue, IMO, it's likely this scene could happen first because he seems to be bothered and bewildered by how close Eddie and Tommy are. Hopefully there's a scene before this one that explains how they became fast friends but it's also possible it'll be another scenario where Eddie magically contacts Tommy or vice versa and they start hanging out but the audience won't see it the same way we didn't see how Eddie magically got M's phone number? 🤷🏽‍♀️

Full disclosure: I don't trust Tommy Kinard and I've already posted about my reasoning (linked here) and I may elaborate on it but I really don't want to because I'd rather not focus anymore of my attention on the character.

Buck's face in the stills below while he's at the firehouse, appear to be hopeful like he got his "Eddie" back but when he sees him walk away, he gets that sad look in his eyes like he's being left behind again. That's why IMO, it happens before the basketball court scene but after them being at Air Rescue.

I tried to put the pictures below in order but since there's no context for when some of them happen, I added them where I thought they should go. Also, since Buck's bag is still on his shoulder in the third picture with him holding the basketball, I figured it happens before they start playing. Maybe Chimney hands it to him and he looks at Eddie and Tommy like him and Chimney are going to win the game.

IMO, Buck will have a conversation with Maddie before the end of the episode and that's when JLH's leaked script will come into play. Also, I believe Chimney will be the one to tell Buck he's acting irrationally then he'll ask him if something else might be going on. Reminder, he's going to be on the court with them and he'll witness the event.

It appears 7x4 will end with them still upset with one another just like 3x5 ended with them not talking.

7x5 - "You don't know me"

I've already completed a post on the title of the episode (linked here) but I do believe multiple people will say, "You don't know me" throughout the episode, including Eddie possibly saying it to Tommy.

When the episode begins, Buck and Eddie still won't be communicating just like they weren't in 3x6. Also, since there aren't any stills that show Tommy and Eddie discussing an available job position at Air Rescue, the only information that was made available came from one of the promos that included Bobby telling Eddie, "I can't tell you how to feel about this job, only you can do that" so it appears Eddie's going to be presented with the option to leave the 118 again either at the end of 7x4 or the beginning of 7x5 but I think his conversation with Bobby will happen at the beginning of 7x5.

Now, ever since TM (showrunner) released the two pictures below in advance of season 7, they've always perplexed me and it's mainly due to the looks on their faces, more so Buck's because he doesn't look angry or frustrated, he just looks tired like he's retreating or giving up. Initially, I didn't speculate on the pictures because I had no idea what was going on and I'm still not sure but based on the things that have been released regarding the episodes, IMO, Buck will apologize just like he did in 3x6 followed by him telling Eddie that he'll have his back if he wants to leave the 118 and go to Air Rescue. Reminder, the last time Eddie left in 5x10, he told Buck in front of Hen and Ravi but the audience only caught a glimpse of Buck's reaction.

I believe the stills below will happen towards the end of the episode and it will be similar to their conversation that happened in the firehouse in 3x6 with a little bit of the 3x9 kitchen scene thrown in. My reasoning is because they're at Buck's loft and Buck will be sitting alone probably pondering what he should do next since it'll be a strong possibility (for him at least) that Eddie will leave and he'll have to find a new partner.

I think Eddie will say something similar to the things he said in 3x6, "I forgive you. Just don't let it happen again" but this time it'll be different and more along the lines of how they talked in 3x9 (related post linked here).

This is where their dynamic seems to change because unlike 3x9, Eddie's not leaned against the counter, he's actually touching Buck's shoulder and his waist the same way he did in 3x1 during Buck's surprise welcome back party but they're the only two present 👀.

When I saw the picture above, I had an immediate reaction to it because it reminded me of something the audience has seen before. I'm not going to include my thoughts on it in this post but I will do a separate one about it.

The point of this post is to illustrate with the BTS stills how the scenes in the next two episodes with Buck and Eddie could play out. Will they finally take the leap at the end of 7x5 and become a CANON couple or will the show continue to delay the inevitable? Only the showrunner, writers, producers, actors and actresses know the answer to that question. Hopefully, they will start their romantic relationship because it's been six years and there's no reason to keep delaying it.

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #911 abc #911 season 7 #911 season 7 speculation #911 spoilers #911 speculation #911 on abc #the buckley diaz family #buckley diaz family #911 meta #anti bucktommy #anti tommy kinard #anti eddiemarisol #anti eddietommy #chimney han #bobby nash #maddie buckley

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glorious-spoon · 5 days

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your way or nothing at all [9-1-1 | Eddie Diaz | 1/1]

In the quieting dark, Eddie lingers by the tables, the empty chairs pushed together in a cluster for a conversation long since abandoned. It's late enough that people are starting to filter out into the night, and pretty much everybody left is crowded at the open bar or swaying on the dance floor. At the high table, Maddie has Buck's suit jacket draped over her shoulders and her cheek tipped against Chim's shoulder, and he's looking down at her with a dopily besotted expression that Eddie can clock even from here.

It makes him feel like—something, some kind of nostalgia for the wedding he never got to have with Shannon. That whole day felt like being hustled through a play that he never learned his lines to. Shannon was three months pregnant and deep in the throes of vicious morning sickness that was not improved by the catering or the stress of the day, so he spent their wedding night holding back her hair in the honeymoon suite his parents paid for and trying desperately to feel like he had a single fucking clue what he was doing. Trying to feel like a man and a husband and a father-to-be and mostly feeling like a complete fraud.

They deserved better. Both of them. Now, in this moment, after this day, it soothes more than it stings to watch Maddie and Chim hold onto each other so easily.

The song changes, and he watches a swirl of motion on the bar side of the dance floor, the particular energy that's easily identifiable as Buck even before he emerges from the crowd. Normally, maybe Eddie would gravitate in, but Buck's got a hand linked together with Tommy's, and they're laughing, and so he stays where he is. Just watches.

It's sweet, a little fumbling as Buck very obviously tries to figure out the logistics of slow-dancing with another guy. Tommy says something in a low voice and settles a palm on his hip, and Buck ducks his head, laughing, and leans into him.

It's sweet. It is. Eddie's throat fucking aches.

He doesn't know why, not really. Maybe it's the smile on Buck's face, wide and giddy and almost embarrassingly bright. He never smiled at Natalia like that, or Taylor. Maybe Ali, but the truth is that back then Eddie wasn't looking for it. Back then, he was so caught up in everything with Shannon, and he and Buck were barely more than friendly coworkers, as strange as that idea seems now.

He probably smiled at Abby like that. Eddie wasn't around for that relationship, only the aftermath, but he can imagine it. You don't hurt that badly when someone leaves you unless you really fucking loved them.

"You would not believe the line for the bathroom," Marisol says from behind him, and Eddie jolts like he just grabbed a high-voltage wire. He tries to spin it into something graceful as he turns to face her, but he's pretty sure it doesn't work, and also pretty sure that he shouldn't be feeling quite so jumpscared at the sight of his girlfriend. His heart is pounding. He rubs his knuckles against his sternum, and Marisol asks, "You okay?"

"Yeah," he says. "Sorry. You startled me."

"No, it's fine." She smiles at him, and it's pretty. She looks pretty, in a blue dress that looks black in this light, little metallic threads picked through and glittering. It hugs the curves of her body in a way that Eddie feels obligated to notice, and so he does, and when he looks her in the eye again she's smiling wider, and that's pretty too and Eddie—

Eddie still feels like a fucking fraud.

"I got you a beer," Marisol says. She's got a glass of wine in her other hand. White wine, lipstick marks on the rim.

Eddie smiles back and takes the bottle she hands him. "Thanks."

"I wasn't sure what you'd want." She grins at him, flirty. "You'll have to tell me if I made a bad guess."

He sips the beer. It's a lager, hoppy and astringent in a way that leaves a bitter aftertaste on his tongue. He takes another drink and smiles around the grimace his mouth wants to make. "It's perfect. Thank you."

The pleased relief in her smile doesn't make the lie feel any better. He takes another sip and sets the bottle down, and Marisol settles her hip against his chair, close enough that he can feel the warmth of her body. Close enough that he could wrap an arm around her thighs and pull her into his lap, if he wanted to do that. He shifts forward instead, leaning his elbows against the table, and she lets out a quiet sound and sets her glass down to sit in the chair next to him. The music switches over from Christina Perri to what Eddie is pretty sure is Savage Garden, and on the dance floor Tommy says something that makes Buck laugh and pull him closer.

"They're cute together," Marisol observes. "Buck and, um… Tommy?"

Eddie's fingers twitch on his beer bottle. "Yeah."

"I didn't know that he was, you know…" she trails off. Eddie looks over at her, and she adds, "Not that there's anything wrong with it! I just, I thought he had a girlfriend."

"They broke up. He dates guys too," Eddie says, more emphatically than is really necessary. Like this is a truth that he's always known instead of something Buck told him two weeks ago in the loft, quiet and careful like he was afraid of how Eddie would react. Like he was afraid of Eddie.

It was a date, we were on a date.

So it's new for Buck, too. Not just him. But still.

It feels like something he should have known.

"Okay," Marisol says. The corners of her mouth tighten, and she takes a pointed sip of her wine. "I didn't know that, is all."

I didn't know either, Eddie imagines saying, but the words strangle themselves in his throat just the same as, Actually, I don't like lagers, and, I don't really want company tonight, did. He wonders how the hell Buck does it—just opens his mouth and lets the truth spill out. Eddie can only manage that when it's for other people. Never for himself.

"Sorry," he says out loud. "It's been… a day."

Marisol's face softens a little, and he feels like shit about that, too. It has been a day, is the thing. He woke up in a bathtub, more hungover than he's been in at least a decade, and after that was a wild goose-chase through the desert to retrieve Chim in time for the wedding, and all that is plenty of reason for him to be off his game now. It's just that somehow it also feels like a fucking lie.

On the dance floor, Buck has his cheek pressed to Tommy's. He says something, and Tommy's shoulders shake with laughter, and then they both turn, moving easily together into a kiss. It's quick and tender, and Eddie abruptly feels like the worst kind of voyeur for watching it happen. He turns his head away and finds Marisol looking at him.

The music changes again. TLC, he's pretty sure, because Chim is deep down a very basic Gen X music kind of guy. Or maybe it was Maddie's pick, who knows. Anyway. It's a little more upbeat, but still slow enough to dance to.

"You, uh." He clears his throat, and finds a smile that feels almost right. "Come on, you wanna dance before they close it all down? They're playing our song."

"This is our song?" Marisol asks, but she's laughing. "I don't even think I was born yet when it came out."

Eddie shrugs and holds out a hand. "It could be our song. Maybe for tonight it's just a good song to dance to."

That must have been the right thing to say. She smiles, sets her wine down, and slips her hand into his, letting him tug her to her feet. They wind their way through the chairs to the dance floor, and under the string lights she settles easily into his arms.

I know you're gonna have it your way or nothing at all, rasps the singer in a sweetly smoky voice, as Eddie closes his eyes, and sways, and breathes, but I think you're moving too fast.

I think you're moving too fast.

He breathes in, and out, and opens his eyes. Marisol smiles up at him, and he smiles back, then cuts his eyes away. There are still a handful of people left on the dance floor with them: Athena and Bobby, swaying together like they're in their own little world, a couple of Buckley cousins with their dates. Buck and Tommy are gone, though, and Eddie almost cranes his head through the crowd to see where they got to before he catches himself.

"To tell you the truth," Marisol says. "I really don't think this is our song."

"Alright, well, we can find another one," Eddie says, and she laughs and sways into him, and he holds onto her, and when he closes his eyes, it's fine; it all feels fine.

#911 #911 fic #eddie diaz #buddie #bucktommy #my fic #i actually have no idea how to tag this pairing-wise lol #it is somehow both all and none of the above

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prettyboybuckley · 24 days

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seven sentences sunday

tagged by the lovely @rogerzsteven 🥰 this is a lot more than seven sentences, but I think I'm allowed after all the Sundays I've missed 🙈 also, would I be me if I didn't use this new storyline as an opportunity to write a threesome fic? Buck comes out to Eddie and tells him about his relationship with Tommy over dinner with both of them. What happens when Eddie reveals that during all his therapy, he figured out that he isn't straight either? "In theory", at least, according to Eddie.

"So, does this change anything?" Tommy asks as he diligently dries off the plates and glasses that Buck hands to him after washing them.

Buck pauses, torso half-turning towards Tommy as he looks at him. "What exactly?"

"Eddie being- Eddie being queer."

Tommy isn't stupid, and he knows that he's said that before, but he'll say it again. He's seen the way those two act together, how they look at each other. The moment the words left Eddie's mouth, he'd kind of figured that it'd been fun, he'd helped Buck figure out his sexuality, and now these two knew about each other, and a few days from now Tommy is going to gently get dumped because Buck can be with his best friend.

He needed to ask.

Buck blinks, tilts his head a bit as if he's thinking, but he doesn't look away, except for a quick glance to the stairs. Eddie's voice as he talks to his son on the phone is drifting down from the loft.

"I don't know," he answers, and Tommy knows it's honest. It's also obvious that Buck knows what he means. "I do know that I don't want it to change anything between you and me. I know it's only been a month, but I really care about you, Tommy."

Oh.

That wasn't was he was expecting. Buck sounds so earnest, though, and Tommy believes him, and it sparks hope.

"Okay," Tommy says, and he can't resist leaning in and kissing Buck, brief and gentle. "That's good, I like that, and I care about you too."

Buck has that soft, shy smile he often gets when Tommy kisses him like that, and it's a weight off his shoulders to know this isn't the end of them, at least not yet. Not all the weight, though.

"You know, you've been so good to me, and patient, helping me figure myself out and everything… I wish Eddie would have someone like that for him."

There is a tinge of sadness there, perhaps at the knowledge that by choosing Tommy — and god, is he really choosing Tommy? Or is he simply scared to choose Eddie? — that will not be him.

And for some reason, that is what puts an idea in Tommy's head. A crazy idea, bordering on insane, but-

He likes Eddie. Earlier today, he was thinking about how he'd have considered dating Eddie, if Buck hadn't been right there flirting with him, and if he'd thought he'd have a chance. Now he's thinking that maybe- maybe there is a possibility.

"What if it does change things? I mean, between the three of us, together?" he asks on a whim as Buck takes off those adorable dishwashing gloves, and Buck's head snaps in his direction. "What if we give Eddie that?"

It seems that Buck is picking up what he's putting down because his eyes widen and his gaze flickers over Tommy's shoulder to the loft and then back. Buck licks his lips, taking in a deep breath, and then he's nodding, a smile curling at the corners of his mouth.

Tommy smiles back.

tagging: @monsterrae1 @saybiwithme @loserdiaz @bi-buckrights @eddiebabygirldiaz @elvensorceress @princessfbi ✨

#gary writes #seven sentence sunday #evan buckley #eddie diaz #tommy kinard #wip

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epicbuddieficrecs · 15 days

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Weekly Recap | April 8th-14th 2024

Managed to put it out slightly earlier this time! 😆 This is still long af and there are still too many fics left in my ao3 inbox but maybe the mini hiatus will allow me to catch up!

As you can see I'm still enjoying podfics and I am happy to report that listening to Coma-Verse made me cry as much if not more as reading it 🙃 You can also looks forward to part 2 of my "BFF fic rec" series which will cover seasons 4 and 5, coming soon!

Enjoy! 😃

Complete

and with each one, i'm a little more free series by honestlydarkprincess/ @honestlydarkprincess (Post-S7E4, Coming Out):

settle (<1K | General): Buck comes out to Chimney. so let the words slip out of your mouth (1,7K | General): Buck comes out to Eddie.

kiss him once for me by 42hrb/ @exhuastedpigeon (S7E5 Spec, Jealous Eddie | <1K | General): Eddie was perfectly happy and accepting about Buck’s sexuality, in fact, he liked to think he was the ideal picture of a best friend when Buck had told him. So, nothing changed between them. Or at least, nothing changed until he sees Buck and Tommy kiss.

when we're barely awake in the heat of the day's weight by trysetmeonfire/ @try-set-me-on-fire (BuckTommy | 1K | Mature): Buck wakes up at Tommy’s place and they have a conversation about taking up space

like an empty bottle takes the rain by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (Post-S7E4, Sexuality Crisis | 1,2K | General): "I was wondering. You and Tommy—how did you know?" There's a soft intake of breath. "That I was into guys? Or that I was into him?" "Either." Eddie shrugs tightly. "Both."

Yes, Daddy by Tizniz/ @tizniz (PWP, Daddy Kink | 1,7K | Explicit): And really, the shit eating smirk that graces Buck’s too pink lips should have been Eddie’s warning. But he’s so used to his best friend’s antics that he’s become immune to them. Or, well he thought he had. “Yes, Daddy.”

don't stand a ghost of a chance (with you) by extasiswings/ @extasiswings (Post-S7E5, BuckTommy Breakup | 1,7K | Teen): Tommy isn’t stupid. He knows the score from the beginning. But. He’s only so strong. And Evan is both hot as hell and supremely adorable. So Tommy kisses him, and asks him out, and tells himself that maybe he’s just been reading the signs wrong. Maybe Evan and Eddie really are just…very…close friends. He’s imagining things. They’re friends—or maybe Evan has a crush—but that’s fine. Evan asked Tommy out. So Eddie is…a nonissue. Tommy tells himself that right up until he can’t anymore.

don't want to be a fool for you by fallingthorns/ @fallingthorns (Bachelor party, Madney Wedding Spec | 1,8K | Teen): Or, at both the bachelor party and the wedding reception, Buck looks at Eddie.

let’s get lost between the lines by wafflesofdoom/ @capseycartwright (BuckTommy, Post-S7E5 | 2K | General): “You handled that well,” Tommy said, as they left the restaurant and stepped out into this cool evening air. His words were soft, and gentle – genuine, even. As though he really meant it. Buck was baffled, frankly. “I handled that with as much grace as an elephant doing ballet,” Buck glared at his - his date? - incredulously. “Tommy, did you hit your head? Are you concussed? Do I need to take you to the emergency room?” or, after the eddie shaped hiccup of their first date, buck and tommy walk and talk - about coming out and why buck deserves a nice boyfriend.

good luck, babe by hattalove/ @hattalove (Outsider POV, Social Media fic, S7E5, BuckTommy Date | 2K | Teen): sometimes, when you've had a bad week, all you want is a romantic evening out with your wife over terrible pizza, and what you get instead is some kind of intricate gay ritual happening two tables away from you.

say my name and everything just stops by bellabrady (BuckTommy, Endgame Buddie, Getting Together | 3K | Not Rated): Or: Buck accidentally moans Eddie's name while making out with Tommy and it leads to some realizations.

behaving myself. by dylaesthetics (Secret Relationship | 3K | Teen): OR it’s just a regular day at fire station one-eighteen. No one’s acting weird. Nothing’s out of the ordinary. Everything's the same as it's always been. Right?

even for a phoenix (i’m getting tired) by hobbitprincess (Post-S5E18, Hurt Buck | 3K | Mature) : “You’re gonna be fine,” says Eddie again, and Buck hates that he can parse out the slight waver that wasn’t there the first time. Buck doesn’t have the heart to disagree with him, even if they both know it isn’t true.

This Old Love Has Me Bound by allyasavedtheday/ @littlespoonevan (Post-S7E4 | 3K | Teen): In an attempt to better understand his newfound bisexuality, Buck tries to figure out if he ever missed any signs with guys before. The universe keeps interrupting every time he's about to think about Eddie.

so much to say that's subject-sore by hattalove/ @hattalove (BuckTommy, Buddie Endgame | 3K | Teen): in which buck is convinced he's having commitment issues, tommy is there to hold his hand, and the tiramisu won't eat itself.

I get drunk on jealousy by heartbeatdiaz/ @loserdiaz (FWB BuckTommy, Endgame Buddie | 5K | Explicit): Eddie calls Buck in the middle of the night at a not so covenient time, words are said, feelings are revealed and Buck's strenght is tested.

shoot another shot (try to stop the feeling) by withmeornotatall/ @chronicowboy (Bachelor Party Spec, BuckTommy, Endgame Buddie | 5K | General): "He just. He won't let me in, Tommy. It's terrifying. I don't know how to help him because he's refusing to even admit there's something wrong." Buck scrubs a hand down his face. "I'm not crazy, am I? I'm not making things up? He's not himself, right?" (OR: eddie gets drunk and cuts a little too loose, buck tries to pick up the pieces and ends up getting more than he bargained for, and tommy is just happy he got to be with buck at least for a little while)

Threes Not A Crowd by Tizniz/ @tizniz (Buck/Tommy/Eddie, PWP | 5K | Explicit): Follow up to Buck's Boyfriends in which Buck's boyfriends take care of him. Incredibly well. (Part 2 of Buck's Boyfriends)

🔥 To Build A Nest (To Build A Home) by Kwills91/ @kwills91 (Post-S5E14, Getting Together | 9K | Teen): Five times Buck shows his love for Eddie via pebbling and the one time Eddie uses those pebbles to build a nest.

don't go breaking my heart. by dylaesthetics (S7E6 Spec, Madney Wedding, Getting Together | 13K | Teen): Coming to terms with being bisexual and being in love with his best friend is not how Buck expected to spend the month or so leading up to his sister’s wedding. But then again, life has shown time and time again that he has been put on this planet to suffer. - OR Buck can’t take it anymore and kisses Eddie in the middle of his sister’s wedding reception. He’s never been known for making good decisions. (Part 2 of heaven is you.)

🔥 Test Drive by ElvenSorceress/ @elvensorceress (PWP, Buck/Tommy/Eddie, Buddie Endgame | 28K | Explicit): In which Buck wants his boyfriend to give his best friend a queer awakening like he had. For no particular reason at all. While he also has the most inopportune "Oh" moment ever.

WIP

Both Bermuda and Golden (Lost but Doing Just Fine) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (PWP, Threesome, BuckTommyEddie | 4/6 | 20K | Explicit): In which everyone has two hands and two holes and is keeping their options fluid. (Or: a collection of threesome fics.)

🔥 Things We're All Too Young to Know by Daisies_and_Briar / @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon S1-S6, S7 Spec | 125/? | 389K | Mature): This is a love story. Even if it doesn’t always look like it. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it. A look back on Eddie and Buck's lives up to now, and what led them to each other, interpreted from the current 9-1-1 canon.

What’s Your Order? by JJK/ @trenchcoatsandtimetravel (Post-S7E5, BuckTommy | 2K | Teen): 5 Times Buck Guessed Tommy’s Coffee Order + 1 Time He Didn’t Have To

🔥 Any Other Way by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, S2 | 8/18 | 45K | Mature): In a switcheroo alternate universe, Buck spends young adulthood in the military, while Eddie, who has no idea Christopher exists, spends his twenties messing around, finally enjoying freedom away from his family’s expectations. When they both end up in Los Angeles, at the 118, some things are different, and others will be the same in any universe.

🔥 Cowboy With a One Track Mind by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergence, Not A Firefighter Buck | 1/4 | 6K | Mature): Spin-off Sequel to Evan Buckley & the Coma-Verse of Madness - Chapter 7 (Land): Grieving and tortured, Evan Buckley has been living alone in Montana in a remote cabin for nearly a decade. After an incident that leaves him missing six months of his life, and suddenly in connection with a group of strangers from Los Angeles, Evan must decide whether to remain in his self-imposed exile, or take a chance at life again.

Podfics

🔥 [podfic] wedding bells by All_I_Ask/ @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove for renecdote/ @renecdote (Friends to Fiances | 10-20 min | General): The background noise of the movie and the warm weight of his best friend against his side is lulling Eddie towards a nap when Buck breaks the silence. “Do you want to get married?” “Sure,” Eddie answers sleepily. “Fall wedding?” “What?” Buck frowns, and Eddie realises: oh, he meant do I want to get married generally not to him specifically. Then Buck is asking, “Why fall?”

🔥 [podfic] do you love me? all you gotta do is say yes by All_I_Ask/ @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove for fleetinghearts/ @shitouttabuck (Outsider POV, Friends to Fiances | 30-45 min | Teen): or, two boy best friends and an ex lover walk into a grocery store. everyone is on their normalest behaviour.

OK with being OK [Podfic] by blackglass/ @blackestglass // fic by S_lycopersicum/ @slycopersicum-in-disguise (Post-S5, Coming Out | 10-20 min | Teen): Buck was about 10 minutes away from the firehouse when his phone pinged. "Message from Eddie Diaz," Hildy's too-smooth voice announced, and Buck laughed at how Eddie's face would scrunch at Hildy knowing his business. "Wait in your car when you get here. I need to talk to you before we go in" Oh shit.

🔥 [Podfic] rainbows have nothing to hide by slipofthetongue/ @burnthatbridge for hattalove/ @hattalove (Getting Together | 20-30 min | Teen): how is eddie diaz like kermit the frog? let buck and christopher count the ways. (Part 1 of the kermit verse)

🔥 [Podfic] Before the Night Fades by slipofthetongue/ @burnthatbridge // fic by MilenaDaniels/ @milenadaniels (Post-S4E14: Survivors, Outsider POV | 45-60 min | Teen): “I have a bottle of champagne, four champagne flutes, one engagement ring to go into one of those champagne flutes, and a note to deliver it all to table 34 with dessert,” Tomas explains, wide-eyed, throwing his hand back to the prep station where said champagne is waiting on ice next to four flutes and a small ring box. “Okay?” “Okay so there’s two men and two women and I have no idea who’s getting proposed to. I’m not even 100% on who came with who." --- Or, EddieAna and BuckTaylor double date and it ruins everyone's night.

🔥[Podfic] Close My Eyes and Stumble (Right Into Your Love) by Ceewelsh/ @mayonnaisetoffees // fic by HMSLusitania/ @hmslusitania (Canon Divergent, S1, Dispatcher Eddie | 2.5-3h | Mature): Eddie's PTSD is just that little bit worse and when he moves to Los Angeles, instead of joining the LAFD, he joins dispatch. Which is all good and fine, except for this one firefighter he keeps ending up talking to.

🔥[Podfic] i did, i did, i do by Ceewelsh/ @mayonnaisetoffees // fic by @hattalove (Canon Divergent | 30-45min | Teen): or the one in which, a couple of weeks after meeting each other, buck and eddie fell in love, broke up, and then forgot to fall out of it.

🔥The Evolution of Buddie [Podfics] by MistMarauder/ @gracieryder for InsaneJuliann/ @marvelingjules (Post-Shooting, Getting Together, Eddie Coming Out, Warning: Homophobia)

[Podfic] Someone Told Me Not to Cry (It's a Lie) (20-30min | Teen): Eddie's fine, he is. Really. He keeps telling himself that until he accidentally calls Buck in the middle of the night after a nightmare.

[Podfic] Just Bros being Bros (45-60min | Teen): It's totally normal to kiss your best friend on the cheek. Eddie has no idea why everyone keeps giving him looks and thinking there's more there.

[Podfic] I was Sinking (Somehow I Forgot) (45-60min | Teen): Eddie tries to figure out just what he may or may not be feeling for Buck. Really, it only leaves him with more questions than any actual answers. His mind keeps twisting around, unable to let him settle with any certainty.

[Podfic] Ready to Suffer, Ready to Hope (S3E18 | 45-60min | Teen): Buck's the one hurting this time, and Eddie wants to help, but he's not sure how, or if he even can. Maybe, he was wrong before. Maybe everyone was. Because clearly, Buck's not as over Abby as everyone seemed to think.

[Podfic] Hard to Learn to Love (45-60min | Teen): Buck's helping Eddie fix Abuela's porch. Eddie's pretty sure he's possibly going to do something stupid, because he can't stop thinking about how much he wants to kiss his best friend.

[Podfic] Someday (Gonna be Free) (45-60min | Teen): Karen points out to Eddie that maybe, his ideas of what a relationship has to look like are something he needs to reassess. She lends him a book, and before Eddie knows it, he's having one epiphany after another.

[Podfic] Bittersweet Triumph (1-1.5h | Teen): Eddie's parents drop by for an unexpected visit. The only thing Eddie can think to do is damage control. Eventually they'd leave, right? Eventually, he could relax again. But he's quickly reaching a breaking point, and he's not sure what'll be on the other side of it.

[Podfic] Pivotal Moment (1-1.5h | Teen): Eddie's stood up to his parents, but of course it can't be that easy. They're still in his house, and Eddie's just waiting for the other shoe to drop. He's frustrated, angry, scared even - and worried about so much at once he can't relax. It's not only leaving Eddie on edge, but Buck seems more and more tense, too.

[Podfic] Hello My Old Heart (1-1.5h | Teen): Eddie needs to check his parents have left - and either way, there's a lot he needs to work through about their visit. Good thing he has family, friends, and Buck to help him figure it all out. And maybe, it's time for him to start showing his hand more, with them all.

[Podfic] Unlearning Lonely After So Long (1-1.5h | Teen): It's the next morning, Buck's still there and making breakfast, and Eddie's realizing that while yeah, the list of things he needs to talk about - with Buck and others - definitely doesn't fill him with anything close to happiness, the rest of it? It's a kind of happiness he hasn't felt in a while.

[Podfic] The More Things Stay the Same (Getting Together | 30-45min | Teen): Eddie's realizing that, now that he's dating Buck, it's not that much different from before, really - except for the increased touching and kissing. That's new. Maybe that's why no one's caught on yet, and they're able to keep it to themselves for now.

🔥 Evan Buckley & The Coma-Verse of Madness by Daisies_and_Briars [Podfic]/@cal-daisies-and-briars by Rhea314 (Rhea)/ @rhea314 (Coma AU, Multiverse | 7-10h | Teen): After being struck by lightning on a call, Buck experiences a plethora of alternate realities showing him different directions his life could have taken. Fighting hard to get home, Buck learns what, or who, is important to him in every lifetime.

Re-Read

🔥 Ace of Hearts by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (Post-S6, Getting Together | 9K | Teen): "I've been wondering…" Maddie pauses, watches Buck make a face like he's bracing to be smacked. "What happened with Eddie? You two were dancing around it for so long, and then… what, it just didn't work out? Was the date really that bad?" She's expecting another wince, or even for him to duck out of the conversation entirely, but instead Buck is staring at her like she's grown a second head. "Maddie. I've never been on a date with Eddie." Or: the poker game was a date. It takes Buck a while to catch on, though.

🔥 all good things come to an end (but it's not the end) by wafflesofdoom/ @capseycartwright (Pre-S4, Quarantine, Friends with Benefits | 10K | Explicit): “Okay, hear me out,” Buck said. "What if we have sex?” Eddie could be forgiven for choking on his own breath, given how out of the blue Buck's suggestion was. “What?” “You’re my best friend," Buck gestured vaguely. "And in case you hadn’t noticed, we’re living through an actual plague right now, so neither of us is actually getting any. So who better to have sex with than each other?" - or, craving intimacy during quarantine, buck and eddie strike up a friends with benefits situation. because it couldn't possibly go wrong.

#epic buddie fic rec #buddie fic rec #buddie fanfiction #buddie fanfic #buddie fic #bucktommy #bucktommy fic #bucktommy fanfic

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wikiangela · 16 days

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fav lines game

rules: share your favourite lines or paragraph you've written from one of your fics, posted or wip.

tagged by @lover-of-mine @bidisasterevankinard @diazsdimples @dangerpronebuddie @hippolotamus

so ofc suddenly I'm forgetting everything I've ever written lol but here's some of the most recent ones idk

from I wanna breathe you in

“Both.” Buck nods, so confident and sure in this. “I want- I want my family, my friends to know that I’m- that I’m bi.” he says, a smile splitting his face. He’s taken a minute to label himself, but when he found this one, it felt right. Bisexual. That’s what he is, that’s what feels like him, like Buck, like Evan. Like all the parts of himself that felt scattered and chaotic and weren’t making any sense are finally settled in the right place, glued together by this realization, by this one simple word – bisexual. The only person who knows so far is Maddie, and he wants to tell everyone else, wants them all to know, and wants to share how happy he is. Besides, he thinks she’s going to explode if she keeps it from Chimney any longer – and once Chim knows, well, even with the best intentions, he sucks at keeping secrets. He doesn’t want Tommy to be his secret. “And I want them to know you’re my boyfriend.” he adds confidently.

from I'm comin' back, don't let me go

He feels like every single action, just getting up, getting dressed, pouring a glass of water, getting something to eat, just anything takes much more effort than it should, than it used to. Living takes much more effort than it used to. Sometimes he thinks maybe it’d be better if he- He doesn’t want to die, not again, not really, but he can’t help thinking that he’d rather not be here. Not when he feels the way he feels. He doesn’t feel like himself, he’s just putting up a front, a Buck-shaped mask in front of people. He feels like a hollow, empty vessel. He just- he doesn’t want to be here.

from you can see it with the lights out (you are in love)

It’s sweet and soft, and it makes Buck’s stomach flutter even more, but at the same time it feels like everything is finally as it should be, like relief, like coming home after a long trip, like taking a breath of fresh air after being in a smoke-filled burning building. It feels familiar, like home, like they’ve been doing this forever, like maybe they’ve been in love through multiple lifetimes, always finding their way to each other. It’s a ridiculous thought, a little bit, that he knows Eddie would fondly roll his eyes at and tell him there’s no such thing as past lives or fate. Buck believes what he believes, though. He feels like he’s loved Eddie for an eternity, and he’ll love him for another one, or a hundred, or a thousand eternities, as long as the world keeps turning, and if there’s anything after that, then even longer. He’s never been more sure of anything in his life.

also this from my most recent fic bc for some reason i just love this little moment haha - we don't know where this is going now (don't be afraid of heights, let me open your heart wide)

“I know.” Evan chuckles, his gaze settling on Tommy’s. “I just- I really want to.” “Okay.” Tommy repeats, smiling, and waiting. It’s fine if Evan changes his mind, but this is his to initiate. Tommy will wait. He’d wait forever, is the thing, and it’s scary, with how short they know each other. “Okay.” Evan echoes, and then he’s grabbing Tommy’s chin, similar to how Tommy grabbed his during their first kiss. His thumb nestles into his cleft, and Tommy sees a flash of an endeared smile before Evan’s lips are on his, fingers not letting him go.

no pressure tags: @elvensorceress @thebravebitch @shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @watchyourbuck

@eowon @loserdiaz @evanbegins @ladydorian05 @wildlife4life

@diazpatcher @monsterrae1 @thewolvesof1998 @weewootruck @loveyouanyway

@spagheddiediaz @rainbow-nerdss @epicbuddieficrecs @pirrusstuff @spotsandsocks

@alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @nmcggg @rogerzsteven @giddyupbuck @tommykinards

@honestlydarkprincess @underwaterninja13 @exhuastedpigeon @911-on-abc @jesuisici33

@steadfastsaturnsrings @theotherbuckley @buddieswhvre @tizniz @daffi-990

@fortheloveofbuddie @hoodie-buck

#fav lines #fic snippet #wikiangela writes #bucktommy fic #911 fic #911 abc #my writing #911 fanfic #buddie fic

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lemotmo · 20 days

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I need to say something...

I've seen quite a few Buddie fans confused and ashamed on my dash lately. Mostly because they feel guilty for not liking Tommy or the bucktommy storyline for various reasons. Some of them even feel anxiety about how the storyline will proceed and resolve. I responded to one of those posts earlier and I'm going to post my response here again for everyone who needs to hear it:

Never feel bad about not liking a character or a storyline. This is fandom and in my opinion all takes are valid. Take it from someone who has been in various fandoms for 24 years now. (Yes, I am that old ;)

If it will make you feel a little better: I don't particularly like Tommy that much either. I mean, I don't hate him but I feel pretty neutral about him. I can superficially see that he is a good guy that likes Buck. And I love him for making Buck feel good and helping him out of the closet. Let it be known that I'm a big fan of bi Buck and I'm so happy that 911 went there with him.

But personally I'm pretty 'meh' about Tommy and when he leaves in a couple of episodes I'll be okay with that. I've also seen some people that have fallen in love with him and want to keep him around. All these takes are valid and more than okay. As long as you respect other people's opinions and thoughts about a character it's all okay. Don't go out of your way to hate-post about him, because you aren't a 14-year old and it's just really distasteful. But, you also can't force yourself to like a character if the feeling is not there.

The same goes for a storyline. I'm okay with the bucktommy storyline at this moment, but I do want it to be temporary, because I want Buddie in the future. And yes, if bucktommy were here to stay, I would be very disappointed in that storyline. I haven't been watching, waiting and hoping for Buddie for 6 years to end up with both guys in another relationship.

And again, that is a valid take and those are valid emotions. It's all okay as long as you are respectful towards the people that do love Buck and Tommy together.

I cope with it by curating my fandom experience. I block haters (whether they hate on Buddie or Bucktommy), avoid bucktommy fanfiction and stay away from the bucktommy tag on Tumblr.

I don't avoid posts on my dash or in the Buddie or spoiler tag that are also tagged bucktommy. I read them, like or respond to some of them. Sometimes I even reblog them if they are interesting and have a link to Eddie or Buddie.

Lastly, don't give up on Buddie yet. I have a feeling things might get interesting the next couple of episodes. Only time will tell if I'm right about this.

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #911 anxiety #this needed to be said

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elvensorceress · 23 days

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So there is a "leaked" script that claims Eddie asked Marisol to move in, and is it just me, or is that completely out of character for Eddie? He dated Ana for longer, and they weren't living together. we are really supposed to believe that he would ask Marisol to move in after a few months of dating? Unless Eddie is unable to process anything after learning his Buck. Is dating a man that is not him, and instead of breaking up with her like he planned, he pulls a Buck and asks her to move in with him.

Eddie does not deserve to be stuck with someone like Marisol.

According to 7x04, he apparently needs a live-in babysitter so he can go out with his shiny new boyfriend. So… 🤣 And it took a whole relationship and a blackout before Ana was his babysitter! Just from that much I’m still going, yikes. Like, girl, do you not have friends? Do you not have someone who will tell you this relationship is red flags all over the place? Can we not call up your Folger brother and have him talk some sense into you?

You’re very right though. Eddie deserves so much better.

I have heard about the supposed leaked scripts and I’ll talk some about that under a cut below in case anyone wants to read my thoughts on it.

But what I’ll say in general is that in some of the interviews we’ve been seeing recently especially with canon bi!Buck, Mr. Showrunner had scathing things to say about love interests who are just there to be love interests. He didn’t like that they couldn’t interact with any of the other characters and that they weren’t part of the overall story.

Given we’ve had what, two? offhand comments and maybe five whole seconds of screen time this season with her, if they wanted to actually develop that relationship for the audience, they could have done that. And should have done that a long, long time ago. (For example, see Eddie and Tommy’s relationship. In one whole episode they did more to build that up than they have done for Eddie/allegedgirlfriendconfirmedterf in all of season 6 or 7.)

Instead, they showcased the bond between Buck and the Diazes and the trauma that Eddie and Chris still have over Shannon leaving and them losing her. And also Eddie’s new friendship with Tommy that sounded like they were both spending every day, every moment together.

So far for Miss Homophobe, we have—

hey mari it me eddie from the hardware store

the phone call where they set up a date

it's not MY date it's CHRIS' date (r u sure, dude? why is she there then 🤣)

her chaperoning Chris’ date with Eddie

her babysitting twice off screen

Obviously, she’s in the next episode and they have a pizza date while Eddie has to stare at his bestest friends while they’re on a date. But at this point, if you want the audience to root for the relationship or enjoy it at the very least, it’s a little late in the game for that? We have nothing to go on and it doesn’t make sense if we’re taking it at face value.

All this to say, if he does ask her to move in with him, there is no way for the audience to buy that it’s genuine, reasonable, or a smart move. It reads like Buck asking Taylor to move in with him because he cheated and he’s desperate and clinging. Even if Eddie and the terf show up and are all happy and handsy and lovey, it’s not convincing. There’s been no development. It would come across like Buck and Ali apartment hunting and being touchy and giggly, and then her dumping him at the end of the episode. It sets up a contrast between what we think is happening and what is really happening. Perceived happiness vs the reality of not knowing each other and their relationship crumbling.

I don’t remember who said it or when it was said, maybe it was Kristen? But I know someone talked about how Eddie rushed things with Ana and they were wanting to do the opposite when continuing his story. Dating someone for (how long has it even been? 2-3 months? Idek? Does Eddie even know?) Mere months and asking them to move in reeks of, “something is going wrong and I have to fix it by doing something rash and ill-advised to keep us together.”

Remind me to do a post about Eddie also being someone who clings and stays because it’s convenient and he doesn’t want to be alone.

It would be completely out of character if it is a sincere, legit thing. However, as a panic response? I buy it. But that also doesn’t bode well for their future. Darn. Hold on, I’ll get the champagne. That relationship is just waiting to be bones. And in an episode called, “You Don’t Know Me,” is where they’re putting their relationship under a microscope? Hildy, cue up the ominous music.

I doubt the glorious day we are free of her will be this week. I think they are just starting whatever they have planned. Unfortunately. I would hope they kept her around and brought her back for a reason like what they did with Eddie/Ana. I want there to be something satisfying about the end and the fact that we have to suffer through this. It just needs to happen quickly because I am so over homophobic terfs who know what fucking show they’re on and what the story is and still persist in their assholish bigotry.

Now? My thoughts on the leaks?

IF we are to believe they are legit, and who knows if they are. But if we are saying they are legit, then Buck comes out to Eddie at the very end and Eddie is surprised. So, Eddie likely wouldn’t be jealous or weird about Buck and Tommy dating if he didn’t even know they are dating. Plus, they just had a whole episode dedicated to jealous!Buck and it would be redundant to immediately take that into, now EDDIE is the JEALOUS ONE. I think they’d have to take the story further for Eddie to really consider how he feels about Buck and Tommy dating.

Maybe it will come down to him being displeased by it (for some unknown reason he just can't put his finger on) and grappling with how he genuinely likes Tommy a lot and that’s a new thing for him and one of Buck’s love interests? But it wouldn’t happen this week. In theory, this week is about Buck feeling like he’s hiding because he just realized he’s bi and hasn’t told anyone yet. Hence, more of the “you don’t know me.”

Obviously, I am rooting for Buddie. All the way. All the time. I like Buck/Tommy just fine but they’re not BuckandEddie. But I think it will take a while before we see anything that might really develop the Buck & Eddie storyline. They’re working on Buck’s bisexual awakening and his first time dating a man. WHERE OH WHERE ARE MY EDDIE STORYLINES. I just want them to do some justice for my boy. Give him something interesting! And for the terf to gtf away from him. :D

And apologies, I rambled a lot at you. Love and hugs!

#911 spoilers #911 s7 spoilers #911 season 7 #jenwyn gets mail #and talks way too much sorry #leaked scripts #?? supposedly? idk how to tag THAT #oh sorry this is so long 🫣#long post

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m3r1m4r5u333 · 1 month

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Argh. I'm in an emotional rollercoaster about this storyline in which Buck gets jealous when Eddie gets close to Tommy.

I mean, on one hand, it's hilarious that it's Tommy, Eddie's male friend, and not Marisol, Eddie's girlfriend, who ignites this jealousy in Buck.

Because doesn't it kinda hint that Buck has (maybe sub-consciously) internalized that Mr. "Imagine Jello with me" Diaz truly is so bad with women...

that any relationship he has with a woman can be happily ignored, as it clearly poses no threat to Eddie's and Buck's relationship.

...HOWEVER!!

On the other hand, the fact that it's Tommy, not Eddie's girlfriend, that sparks this jealousy... ?

It wrecks me because it also is pretty damn heart-breaking and sad if you look at it another way!!

Maybe this jealousy, sparked by a male friend, tells another story of Buck's thought progress.

Maybe it tells us a tale of Buck getting burned before, and learning from that, and then, to avoid further hurt, rethinking his role in Eddie's life, and clinging to what he thinks is safe and certain.

After all, there was a time when Buck, Eddie and Chris did so much together, all the time. They were close, Buck was absolutely parenting, Buck felt like he really belonged. They were a family.

And then all of a sudden, it was taken away from him!!

Imagine how deeply that would hurt.

This severed connection is btw, pretty heavily implied/canon, I think - we pretty much know, I'd argue, that when Eddie started dating Ana, there was a time when Buck did not get to see Chris much.

In the episode in which Ana and Chris visit Eddie at the firestation in 5x02...

Buck is overjoyed to see Chris, he gives him a really fierce hug, immediately asking Chris "How are you?"

I really get the impression that they haven't seen in a while.

It's supported by the way Eddie watches and grins like it's such a thrill for him, to see Buck and Chris meet - that's not really something he'd do if he saw them interact all the time, is it?

What Eddie says after he forgets to introduce Ana (too spellbound by Buck and Chris to remember her existence, basically) and has a panic attack - further supports this faltering connection.

Eddie runs off under the pretense of needing to put the salads Ana brought to the fridge.As he's making his escape, in panic, he mutters

"I don't want these things to wilt."

It's supposed to be an explanation - must save the salads from wilting! - but combined with the way he says that soon after he's just witnessed Buck and Chris meet, and the subtext telling us that it's been a while...

Eddie has just been reminded of how well the Diaz-Buckley family fits together,

and does not want those bonds to wilt - and he's realising that they have been, due to Ana pretty much taking over Buck's former parental duties. (And hey, then Eddie pretty promptly dumps Ana.)

But that doesn't erase or entirely fix what has already happened.

Buck has learned that he is replacable, that his status in the Diaz family is not guaranteed. He can be family one day, and then all of a sudden, shut out.

Learning that he's written in Eddie's will would not really cheer him up much, either. It's not security to know that he can be a parent, truly, without question - if Eddie is dead.

And then that talk he has with Eddie about a ready-made family. It really makes it clear that Buck is hurt. He tries to hide it, but it's so visible when Eddie talks becoming a ready-made family, and Eddie not knowing if he's ready for that.

Supposedly Eddie is talking about his ready-made family with Ana... But he's looking at Buck. He says "we became a ready-made family". And looks Buck in the eyes.

They aren't total idiots, they would have realised how much this whole unit of Chris+Eddie+Buck spending time together really imitates other families.

So there's no way that they don't realise that on some really repressed, strange level, this talk is about them, being a family.

Also, why would Buck look so hurt and sad, why would he look down, if he was fine with the way things have been? If Eddie was really talking about just Ana, and Buck had never felt like he was family, why would that talk about a ready-made family make him feel so uncomfortable?

Buck is hurt because he knows he was family, and he knows he was replaced, and then Eddie even kinda admits it.

And Eddie also implies that he's not ready for that.

That's really not an invite to get invested again. Nope, it's a life lesson for Buck:

Do not take these family interactions for granted. Who knows when Eddie is done with them, and you find yourself outside in the cold again!

So Buck deals with that by clinging to what is safe. What is secure. What he thinks he can have, and keep.

He decides that even if his role as a co-parent is uncertain, and may end up in the bin whenever... His role as a best friend? That's guaranteed.

So he does not feel threatened by Eddie's girlfriends. He understands now what space Eddie's partners may take in Eddie's and Christopher's life,

but that's fine because Buck can set up another spot for himself. It's maybe not ideal, not what he'd choose, but it's a spot nevertheless!

After all, Eddie finding another girlfriend, or even a wife, another co-parent... Does not remove Eddie's need for a best friend. Even married people crave friendships! So that role is available, that Buck can do, holding onto that won't get him burned!

He thinks.

And then this fucker Tommy steps into the picture, and Eddie bonds with him.

Buck gets nervous. What if he's wrong? What if even the friendship, the best friend status, is something that can be suddenly ripped away from him?

So Tommy is now competition, a threat, someone who could steal the one position by Eddie's side that Buck thought he had, for certain, for good.

Buck is worried. Jealous. Angry. Scared.

...

Anyway! See now, why this storyline is absolutely destroying me?!

#911 abc #buddie #911 buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie 911 #evan buck buckley #911 on abc #911 speculation #eddie díaz #abc 911 #tommy kinard #ana flores #christopher diaz #the buckley diaz family

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matan4il · 20 days

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911 ep 705 first watch reactions

Of course 911 would "punish" the "You are the boss of you!" guy with an alien hand that attacks him, and does what it wants. Pooor Buck and Eddie paying the price for that...

Okay, love the storyline with Hen and Karen possibly eventually adopting an older girl. Too many shows just find easy, unrealistic ways to give their same sex couples kids, and I am really glad that 911 shows the reality of it, and that it is a more complex struggle for many, that it's an act of continuously choosing to be parents. That's actually an amazing, difficult thing, and it should be faithfully depicted and respected, for all of its heartache, and the little moments of triumph.

Buck and Tommy on a date, and Eddie comes along with Marisol? Love how Buck's bisexual awakening and coming out continues to involve Eddie so much. Tell me they're end game, even if they're not gonna get together right now, without telling me they're...

I did not need to learn Marisol is moving in with Eddie like this, with any build up, or even any sort of insight into the relationship, and nope, that does not bode well for them. IDK how 911 managed to do it, but they have somehow managed to give Eddie a love interest the show is even less invested in than Ana.

And the funniest bit, is that Marisol and Eddie's big development is only there to further Buck's journey anyway.

"You can never have too much closet space" LMAO the way 911 both made me laugh, and feel sorry for poor, baby bi Buck. XD

Hmmm. Were parts of this scene cut out? We don't get to see Eddie on his own date with Marisol, but constantly looking over at Tommy and Buck? Boo. I'm glad we at least got the BTS photos, then. But seriously, why!? That was gonna be so delicious.

Oh, Tommy's breaking up with Buck. I mean, good for him, and he ain't wrong after Buck's "after this, we're gonna go out looking for chicks" reaction, but man do I feel sorry for Buck. Him and Tommy might not be my end game (Buddie forever will be), but I do think this relationship could be good for our baby bi. Tommy being in the same profession, knowing what it's like to have this gap between who you are and the image of guys in your line of work, plus he's got more experience than Buck, is sure of himself, can help our boy figure himself out, and also Buck obviously does like his vibe. He deserves to be with someone he actually likes, not just the first woman willing to be with him that the plot pushed in his way.

Oh, baby Buck. :( You didn't even tell Maddie about Tommy. You really aren't ready it. But also (and as a Buddie shipper, more importantly), Tommy broke things off with Buck, but what is eating him up, is that he lied to Eddie. XD Yeah, this gonna end with wedding bells, sooner or later. On screen, off screen after the show ends with canon Buddie, or only in my head if 911 never dares make Buddie canon, I don't care. That kind of emotional devotion is not something that my hopelessly romantic heart can ignore.

OMG, this is how Buck comes out to Maddie? XD Via random pronoun mention, and as a by product of trying to figure out how to tell Eddie the truth? This is hilarious. lol It really makes it clear that, after all, the issue for Buck really isn't people knowing he is also dating guys (or checking their asses), even when it's the other closest person in the world for him, it's Eddie. Specifically. Buck's ready, even if he doesn't have the exact clear words yet, he's just not ready to tell Eddie. Can't imagine why. XDDD

What was that awkward post-sex scene with Eddie and Marisol? And the issues with her moving in are popping up a second after she has. But yeah, we have no idea who this woman is as a person, she's been a cardboard cut out so far, and then one of the first things we do learn about her, is that she would call her stuff better than Eddie's? Once again, this is not the stuff great romance is made of. Or... even just the stuff any kind of romance is made of.

Wait, Marisol was a nun, and Eddie didn't even know!? This whole ep is telegraphing in the news of how weird and awkward and underdeveloped this r/s is, not just for us as viewers who know nothing about Marisol, but apparently for Eddie as well.

And of course his Catholic guilt is gonna kick in now. I'd care, except 911 has given me absolutely no reason to. Seriously, I care more about Buck and Tommy after just 2 eps, than Eddie and Marisol, even though this is technically her 2nd season on the show.

Of course Buck went to find Eddie, and spotted him at the gym. Forever 201 vibes, with Eddie being the focus of Buck's attention. ^u^

I couldn't care less about Eddie's Catholic guilt crisis, and how it's actually a projection of what his real issues are with Marisol, but it's nice to see that as always, Buck's the one who can tell when something's off, and offer Eddie exactly what he needs (even when that's to talk to someone else, but Buck figures out immediately who the right person to address is), and then they just very naturally switch, because Eddie can also tell when something's off with Buck, and he wants to tell him something. Soulmates. THAT is the stuff that great romance IS made of.

:/ The imagery of Catholic nuns has not been around for over 2,000 years, please stop being ignorant about your own religion, and the very different way it looked in its early days.

Bobby is forgiven, he does give good advice, and his "her ex, the Lord" bit, which prompted that reaction from Eddie, is hilarious. XD

So... when Eddie is having issues with Marisol, he already knows he has to figure out how he feels about her, but instead of doing so, he goes to his safe place... Buck's loft.

Man, Eddie being into Tommy's choice of avoidning relationships with women, and hanging out with boys, after in the past, Eddie had dealt with his Shannon issues by running away from her, and re-enlisting in the army, where he gets to hang out with boys, when we all (Buck included) know why Tommy's "hanging out with boys"... I do like that if they want to (and hopefully they do), this further lays the groundwork for Eddie's own queer realization.

Buck and Eddie helping each other with their respective romantic problems, without realizing they are each other's respective romantic solution is gonna make me chew on my own fists. Again. But I'm not even a little bit surprised that Eddie was totally fine and accepting of Buck being bi, or that the first thing he thought of is how this reflects on them. Because their friendship IS way deeper and closer than normal for platonic friends, and Eddie's little reassurance is also an admission of that.

Man, for a second I was worried they also cut out Eddie in the loft, once more putting his thumb on Buck's pulse point possessively, in a perfect parallel to 303. I would have sued for emotional damages. But yeah, it says so much that the peak of emotional meaningfulness for Buck when coming out is in relation to Eddie, and that the scene itself peaks with Eddie, instead of finishing rushing out to take care of his own romantic business, hurries back to Buck first, to hug him, place his hand on Buck and give him orders. "Sure, you're gonna be dating this guy, but I'm still your real husband."

Well, at least Eddie amitted to himself and Marisol that he doesn't actually know her. But... I have never seen two people being both being so happy about not moving in together, and I'm supposed to think this r/s has a chance? Okay. Suuuure.

The scene with Buck going to Tommy to set things straight ready for something was lovely, it was nice seeing him excited, and get to choose, and hear he's wanted. But since the note Tommy and Buck's storyline in this ep should have ended on, is Buck showing Tommy he's ready enough to let others know he's dating a guy by inviting Tommy to come with Buck to Madney's wedding, then why is the very next scene playing the romantic switch again, making us think Buck's car just arrived at the wedding with him and Tommy, only for Buck and Eddie to walk in together? I see what you did there, 911.

Thank you for reading! If you're looking for more, you can find my s7 reactions tag here, and more of my Buddie meta and content in my pinned post. xoxox

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sevensoulmates · 18 days

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7x05 Buddie Meta YDKM Part 2 (of 4)

Part 1. Part 3. Part 4

I just want to make an aside and say that I'm really happy they didn't go the route of having Maddie just "know" about Buck's queerness. As much as it's a funny headcanon, in real life "the glass closet" reaction from other people can feel invalidating, and Buck obviously reacts defensively when Maddie says "Wow", wanting to know immediately why she would say that. Also, just because Maddie is his big sister doesn't mean she automatically knows everything about Buck. I'm glad that both she and Eddie reacted with some surprise but mostly just acceptance.

I like that they're making it a point to show that even though it feels like Buck liking men is coming out of nowhere, it's really not. He's felt feelings for men and sexual attraction to men in the past, he just thought it was all normal. This also reminds me of his relationship with Eddie (and not just because Buck admitted to being an ass man and we all know who has the best ass on the show) because he views the relationship he was with Eddie to be "normal" best friends when it's really not true. There's a lot of nebulousness there but then in the scenes where it very much stands out that this is not typical male best friendship. But Buck just didn't realize it, and my guess is Eddie doesn't realize this either.

Very brief aside, but my roommate thought this line was interesting because apparently "clefts" in men are supposed to be generally perceived as "super manly" or known for being something The Manliest of Men have (think Clark Kent/Superman) and I just find it interesting that Buck's attracted to something that's very stereotypically masculine. Once again proving that he's attracted to the male form, not just personalities or such.

Qualifying Tommy as "Eddie's friend" here is fascinating because I really think Maddie was flashing back to the last episode when Buck was in her kitchen complaining about Tommy and Eddie, and Maddie had justified it as Buck being "friend jealous" only for Buck to turn around and date Tommy all of a sudden. I think a lot of things are slotting into place for her now, and I think a lot of her "wow" comment was also her thinking about the implications of this too.

Hence why this next line feels pointed. It's very straightforward, practically bashing us over the head at this point. Buck's not sure of his own feelings yet. I don't think this is meant to say he's unsure of being bisexual or attracted to men, but that's he unsure of what he's feeling in regards to who the object of his affection is at the moment.

"If there's something you need to tell Eddie, you will. In your own time."

Are you kidding me? Could you BE any more blatant? It's not "you'll come out to Eddie when you're ready." or "you'll tell Eddie about Tommy when you're ready". It's a purposely vague line because Buck doesn't know what his feelings are just yet, but those of us who have been paying attention know. What he has to tell Eddie goes far beyond just his newfound bisexuality. And once Buck figures out what his feelings are, that's when he'll tell Eddie that "something". And it's not gonna happen on anyone's timeline but Buck's. This line really leads me to believe that Buck is a strong contender to figure out his feelings by the end of the season and may end up being the first person to admit their feelings (possibly later on in season 8).

Trigger warning for Eddie/Marisol post-sex scene:

Firstly I want to draw several comparisons to Eddie's previous scenes with his love interests. The first is that this wide shot of the setting before panning to them in bed reminded me of the scene in 4x08 Breaking Point where Eddie is on his date with Ana and we hear grunting/moaning sounds, but it's a fake-out to them just sitting on the couch learning math. This time, it's not a fake-out, they really were having sex in this scene. The second parallel is the fact that Eddie and Marisol are lying together upside down on the bed. In my opinion, this is a blatant call-back to Shannon and their sex scene in 2x10 Merry Ex-Mas. Which to me signals a couple of things. 1.) That Eddie is very obviously trying to force Marisol to be a replacement for Shannon and 2.) He's doing the same thing with Marisol that he did with Shannon and using sex as a distancing method.

I know that sounds contradictory. Why would he ask her to move in if he's been trying to distance himself from her? Bear with me and I'll explain in a minute.

We know that Eddie doesn't know Marisol all that well, as proven by this episode. So what were they doing all of this time when they've been dating for months? Just not talking? Nope. Apparently, they've been having sex. So much sex apparently that they haven't been able to have any "get to know you" conversations.

With Shannon, the two of them had sex because it was easier than actually trying to talk to each other. Because when they would talk, it would always devolve into screaming fights. If Eddie is subconsciously trying to make his relationship with Marisol into the one like with Shannon, that may be an explanation as to why he's been so hesitant to actually get to know her at all. I'll come back to this more later.

Now I'm curious if anyone else picked up on this line because it felt like a clear parallel to season 5, but not to Eddie's last relationship. Instead, it felt like a parallel to BuckTaylor shortly after she moved in 5x13 Fear-O-Phobia. Not only is BuckTaylor paralleled because Buck also asked Taylor to move in on a whim in order to save a failing relationship, but it's also where Taylor decided her couch (any couch theory truthers out there?) was better than Buck's couch and therefore he would have to get rid of his in order to make room for hers. To me, that showed Taylor's clear inability to make any compromises with Buck, and anywhere she lived would always be her place, and not theirs. This parallel is interesting because it just makes me think that it's foreshadowing more incompatibility for Eddie and Marisol in the future. With Marisol "invading Eddie's home", the more of her that is moved in, the more of himself he has to get rid of, shut down, or deny. That's not to say Marisol is on the same level as Taylor Kelly, oh no, but it might just show that this relationship Eddie has with Marisol might just be as unhealthy for him, as Buck's relationship with Taylor was for him.

I also find it interesting how Eddie starts to make what he's learned sexual. He's not talking about your general "slapping of the hands or arms with a ruler", spanking very much has one definition, though it can be used in both PG and sexual situations. Spanking of a child's bottom is used as punishment, often to cause shame, in order for the child to not do certain things again. (This might be a controversial take but) spanking a child is physical abuse, and often has psychological repercussions on a child as they grow up. Eddie here seems to be insinuating that he was put through something similar when he was young. But then he also conflates it with the sexual form of spanking which should normally be fine between consenting partners. To me, I think Eddie is now subconsciously mentally connecting shame, punishment, and the conditioned urge to Never Do It Again or suffer the consequences with having sex with Marisol. The question then begs, what is Eddie so ashamed of and what are the consequences he's so afraid of?

I find it very curious that rather than Eddie being concerned that Marisol is too religious for him, or that they might have differing lifestyles that may not be compatible, he worries how this will affect their sex life. In my opinion, it's because on some level he's aware if he can no longer have sex with Marisol, what else are they supposed to do with the time they spend together? Do they have anything in common? Do they share any hobbies? It's especially interesting juxtaposing 7x04 where Eddie was having a BLAST going on dates outings with Tommy, and they had so much in common and Eddie was just asking Marisol to babysit multiple times a week. So with the little time he has been spending with Marisol recently, all they've been doing is fucking.

It's the same pattern of distancing he did with Shannon. She got pregnant, they got married, Eddie immediately enlisted and preceded to spend most of the following 4-6 years away from Shannon, only seeing her for short periods at a time where they spent most of the time they did see each other fighting. When he was back, Eddie was emotionally distant, which was a large part of the reason Shannon left in the first place. And when she came back, and he didn't have any other ways to distance himself? He used sex instead, and only really got it into his head that he wanted to get back with her when she had her pregnancy scare.

That's not to say there weren't good moments, or that Eddie didn't love her. But I do think a large part of the reason Eddie looks back on that time and romanticizes it is because he enjoyed the concept of being married to her and the safety net that provided him. Their marriage/feelings for each other were nuanced, but it can't be denied that from what we've seen on screen (which is all we can really call canon) it seems like a large part of their marriage was spent in (mutual) deep dysfunction.

So now that he doesn't have sex as a way to distance himself from Marisol what does he do? Avoids her physically as much as he can.

Additionally, I would like to touch on something known as the Madonna-Whore Complex:

After we see Marisol in her nun attire, the next time Eddie sees her, he sees her as the Virgin Mary, mother of Christ, aka, the ultimate Mother Figure in catholicism. One could argue that Eddie's turned off because she reminds him of old teachers who apparently used to physically hit him and probably weren't very open to certain things that they would classify as "sin" or "ungodly".

Towards the end of their relationship, Eddie very much only saw Shannon as Christopher's mother, enough so that Shannon even questioned if he wanted her for her. Now he seems to be going through a similar problem, but instead of Marisol being the literal mother of his child, he's seeing her as this Mother figure and therefore unfuckable, hence his struggles to feel arousal about her after this. But as we're shown later as proven by Bobby, it does feel as if Eddie is using the whole Catholicism thing as an excuse to distance himself from Marisol.

So what's the truth of this? The Madonna-Whore complex is rooted in misogyny and patriarchy, but where do queer or repressed queer men fall into this category? That might be a little above my pay grade to answer, but it is still something interesting to think about.

This was very telling as well. "To avoid not having sex" essentially means he was purposefully avoiding having to talk with Marisol in order to turn her down for sex. Idk, but if you're in a good enough partnership where you're at the point of asking them to move in, it's usually assumed that you at least know how to communicate to your partner that you don't want sex. Why is Eddie afraid to tell Marisol that he doesn't want to have sex with her? It makes sense if ALL they've been doing most of the time they spend together is having sex. If he has to tell Marisol no to sex, what are they going to do then? Talk? Actually get to know each other? God forbid.

This starts the series of scenes in this episode where Eddie does everything in his power to avoid having a conversation with Marisol because now his sex-crutch is no longer there to distract the both of them.

I'll admit I didn't know what the "Manchurian catholic" and "sea monkeys" dialogue lines meant but I've since done some research and I get it now. "Manchurian Catholic" is a reference to the movie "Manchurian Candidate" which is basically about a man who has was brainwashed into being an assassin, highlighting the psychological effects of suppressed memories and trauma. Sea monkeys were a children's thing where you had like shriveled shrimp where if you add water, they blow up in size. Basically, there are three lines all pointing to the same thing: Eddie's sitting on a well of repressed feelings (that are attached to shame) that may have been conditioned "out" of him over time.

This is what is known as Catholic Guilt. The question then becomes: What does Eddie feel guilty for? What "sin" has Eddie committed that is making him feel so guilty? Having sexual relations with a woman who was an almost-nun? Having pre-marital relations? Could be on the surface.

The show is acknowledging that Eddie is far more repressed than he even realizes. I feel like these lines are inviting the audience to think deeper: what is Eddie repressing here? Is it really just that he doesn't want to have sex with Marisol because God is watching and judging him for pre-marital sex or sleeping with one of his exes (thank you Bobby for that amazing line)? Or is it something different?

Marisol never actually got far enough to be a full-blown nun. She made the choice not to continue with it, but Eddie still has a problem with it. The main part of the problem, in his own words, is that he can't get aroused when he looks at her anymore. Not only that but he's been unable to even masturbate because the thought of her turns him off that much. Like my dude, there's no rule that says you have to imagine your girlfriend while jacking off. A lot of people, even people in loving committed relationships, have sexual fantasies that don't necessarily involve their partner and it doesn't necessarily make them a horrible person. I think it's interesting that even in his sexual fantasies Eddie's so strict about being "loyal" to his partner, that he can't even allow himself to imagine anything else other than her when getting off. But now, he can't because the nun things turns him off that much.

I can't help but wonder, is it really the nun thing, Eddie? Or is it that Marisol's strong connection to catholicism reminds you of times when you were forced to push down parts of yourself that were only starting to blossom in order to conform to what your religion and your family expected of you. Is it that the nun thing turns you off so much that you can't get hard? Or is it because now that you've been reminded of how you suppressed your feelings growing up, the reservoir of feelings has bursted and you're being reminded that women....just don't do it for you in general. But to think about men is to invite shame, punishment, guilt, and pain, and to be avoided at all costs.

Maybe it's easier to pretend it's the nun thing and not a women thing.

On a slightly more humorous note:

Buck's "I wish I could help you with that" line is VERY interesting. Freudian slip, mayhaps? Do you wish you could help Eddie get off, Buck? DO YOU? ;)

Other than that, I also wanted to point out that this scene in the gym is a parallel to 5x02, when Buck and Eddie last sat in these exact spots and Buck did the exact same thing and gave Eddie good advice about how to handle his last girlfriend Ana, basically telling Eddie to stop stringing Ana along. I find it interesting we're getting callbacks to Eddie's last break up because last time he also decided he was just going to stick it out and it was only Buck giving him some perspective that allowed him to finally make the decision to break up with her in the following episode.

But this time, Buck isn't able to fully tell Eddie all that he wants to say, which is the truth about himself. He gives him advice to talk to Bobby. And Bobby's conversation with Eddie is the LOUDEST in the entire episode.

This scene is incredibly revealing because it shows that Eddie isn't even really sure if it is his feelings regarding Catholicism that are triggering this reaction in him. Bobby rightly points out that the effects of being raised Catholic don't just go away once you leave the faith. They can have lasting and lingering consequences, some that people might not even realize until later in life.

Bobby very blatantly tells Eddie that this adverse reaction he's having to Marisol's past as an almost-nun is likely a reaction similar to his panic attacks that he had about Ana when things were moving too fast with her back in season 5. Bobby says Eddie never talks about her, not in any way that makes it seem like he was so serious about her as to ask her to move in. This comes out of nowhere for Bobby (and the rest of the characters) just as it does for the audience. This is to show us that what Eddie is doing IS out of nowhere and is a decision that should be questioned not just by the audience but by Eddie as well.

The fact that Bobby is comparing this reaction to how he acted with Ana really does harken back to the "repression" storyline of season 5. Eddie's subconscious is trying to tell him something, but he's ignoring it (as he always does) and is instead doing the exact opposite of what he should do and doubles down on Marisol.

And Eddie, as always, gets the exact opposite message of what Bobby's trying to tell him. Because Eddie's not a commitment-phobe. He commits too much, too fast, almost as if he cares more about getting to the "committed" part of the relationship, and doesn't care enough to actually build an actual bond with the women he's with. And Bobby gets to the heart of it by name-dropping Shannon. Because the crux of his commitment issues started with her. When he felt so guilty for getting her pregnant and then later for abandoning her for the military, that he basically vowed to stay committed to her for the rest of time, in life and in death. She's been dead for five years at this point, and Eddie is still hung up on his guilt over her. And no, I will not say he's hung up on her or his romantic love for her because that's not true as proven by his next line.

All I have to say is THANK GOD. Thank GOD the show is finally acknowledging that Shannon and Eddie did not get married because they really wanted to, or because they just loved each other so much. They got married because they got pregnant and were pressured into getting married by their catholic community and families. The show is finally starting to deconstruct Eddie's marriage and his romanticizing it over the years.

This line blew me away. Because he doesn't say "I loved her" or "I loved being with her." He loved being married. He liked being committed. He liked the knowledge that he had what was expected of him, a wife and a child. He liked being settled, knowing that he wouldn't ever have to go back out and make himself vulnerable to find another partner. He would never have to crack himself open so far to be truly known and get hurt. They could both hurt each other so deeply and it wouldn't matter because Eddie at least did his duty. He married her, made an honest woman out of her in the eyes of the church and their families, and provided monetarily for her. But he never gave her him, not fully, and that comes straight out of the mouth of Shannon Diaz herself.

What Eddie is seeking from Marisol is not a partnership, it's not a genuine connection with an individual. Because to create those kinds of relationships requires exposing yourself and letting in the possibility of being judged, of being hurt, of losing them. And Eddie doesn't want to be so invested in a person like that ever again. He already experienced that kind of loss with Shannon, and even they didn't have that kind of deep soul connection. I wonder if Eddie's afraid that he wouldn't survive that kind of loss if it was actually a partner he really deeply and unconditionally loved. It might destroy him, and that scares him.

So instead, Eddie would rather just skip forward to committed, to moved in, to married, to settled, and just stick it out when he has panic attacks, when he feels like he's sleeping next to a stranger, when sex is as deep of a connection he can ever get with a woman.

But when his body fights back, in various ways, in panic attacks, in sexual dysfunction, he doesn't listen to it. He ignores the signs.

Go to part 3!

Part 1, Part 3, Part 4

#911 abc #911 speculation #buddie #meta #911 meta #buddie meta #analysis

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