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lilacsandthistles · 3 years

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Finally writing down some dsmp bee duo family headcannons! There's a lot of angsty stuff circulated in the fandom so I thought I'd share some more lighthearted and fluffy ones :)

- Tubbo and Ranboo's marriage is actually a qpr! Like in canon it was for "tax purpose", but a big part of it was simply that they've grown really close and thought "why not marry my friend?" not too long after planning getting Michael from the nether.

- Both Tubbo and Ranboo are aromantc, Tubbo being relationship neutral while Ranboo's relationship positive.

- The _Beloved household had a habit of picking up members for a found family, while not using any terms like "dad" or "sibling", people like Tommy and all of the Syndicate having close family-like relationships.

- Tubbo actually isn't the hugest fan of more standard domestic activities in terms of filling time, preferring projects like building that water tunnel to Snowchester, but finds himself doing them more with Ranboo. He's found that these things like planning meal recipes ahead, choosing what texture blankets are best to get and choosing toys to gey for Michael to be a lot better with someone else.

- Whenever Micheal sees Tubbo or Ranboo do some task (like cooking to enchanting) he always really wants to do it too and help, so they promise they'll teach him when he's older. And in an au where Michael does age Tubbo and Ranboo do actually get to teach him and loves it.

- After a few of his "casual" styled clothes (shirts and hoodies) going missing from the shared mansion close, Ranboo goes on a mission to find them and ends up going to Tubbo. And surprise surprise! Tubbo had stolen the clothes claiming their comfortableness as the reason why, Ranboo may or may not have "get Tubbo me-sized clothes" on a to-do list somewhere.

- Tubbo has the issue of constantly feeling a little big cold no matter the weather 95% of the time while still drinking pretty much only cold drinks. This might or might not be one of the reasons why there are different blankets in different rooms across the mansion. While Ranboo himself doesn't ever feel the need to use the blankets, he's always more than happy to join his husband and son when they're trying to stay warm.

- Fire resistance and it's modified counterpart, water resistance, are among the list of potions that are always in stock at the _Beloved home. Healing, regeneration, invisibility, extra protection and mending books, maybe even a golden carrot here and there... Making sure the mansion still has certain items stored up is a busywork activity as well as reassurance both of the teens living in the giant house are more than happy with.

- Both Tubbo and Ranboo have matching Snowchester, and while Tubbo certainly has more than the other, they each have patches saying 'TB' and 'RB' respectively. While this was just a shortening of just their first names the patches would eventually be updated to 'T_B' and 'R_B' to go alone with the new 'M_B' patch. Tommy might might not have seemed to be at a loss finding out it stood for '_Beloved.'

#LT post #LT's concepts #tubbo_#tubbo #ranboo #ranboolive #dsmp michael #micheal_beloved #dream smp #dsmp

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dewa-chan · 7 years

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Mermaid AU relationships-related stuff (both platonic and romantic) under the cut...!

The neck area, mainly around the gills, is very sensitive. They breath from both nose and gills, but if they gills are covered or compromised in any way, they risk suffering from oxygen shortage because the nose alone isn’t enough. Because of that, merpeople only allow close, trusted ones to touch them around the gills. It’s a very intimate and affectionate act, common among families and lovers with very strong bonds.

Any other kind of touch around the gills is seen as borderline offensive or as a threat. If it’s accidental it can be brushed off, however the affected merperson might get more wary.

In order for the merpeople to engage in romantic relationships, they first need to court each other. It can be through giving each other gifts, caressing their ear fins, ticking each other with their tail and flipper fins, and much more. The courtship ends with one of the pair giving the other a handmade gift. If the courtship attempt is accepted, the gift will be kept. If not, it’ll be refused and it’ll need to be destroyed.

Courting usually starts at 15-16 years old, but most merpeople only start ‘for real’ around 17-18 years old.

The way a merperson courts another is different for everyone, despite the most common acts.

Tickling with fins isn’t a courtship-exclusive thing. Actually, it is pretty common among friends, since it is seen as a way to strenghten bonds.

While merpeople can only engage in romantic relationships through courting, when it comes to aromantc/asexual pairs, the courting can be used as a way to simply strenghten their bonds, not necessarily having to lead to a romantic relationship.

Hair ornaments made out of algae are very common gifts among friends.

Couples in a strong relationship may give each other baby scales from their First Change. It is seen as “I’m trusting that you’ll take care of me.’’

Young mermen usually like to show off their fins when seeking their friends’ attention, or to impress romantic interests.

Mermaids who are close friends tend to wrap the tip of their tails around each other while sitting/idle.

Married couples give each other pearl necklaces instead of rings. Rings can end up injuring their webbed fingers.

Happy couples usually swim extending their fins, to show how happy and comfortable they are with each other.

On abusive/unstable relationships, the couple (or the abuse victim) may swim with straightened/folded fins, a sign of how they don’t feel safe or comfortable around the other.

Close friends may playfully chew on each other’s ear fins. Not to hurt, only to tickle.

Swimming/lying closely and above another merperson is a clear way to show how much you want to protect them.

Wrapping your arms around a merperson’s neck can either be seen as a playful, intimate action or a threat to their lives. It all depends on how close the relationship is.

#yoi mermaid au

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color-in-your-hands · 7 years

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What I know about being aromantic I read on Google. Last week. So please educate me: Are Ronan and Adam in a queerplatonic relationship? Is the intensity of his feelings for Ronan (and the sex) what sets that particular relationship apart from his friendships with Gansey and Blue? Can Adam have more than one queerplatonic relationship?

I’m tucking this under a cut because I don’t want to accidentally cause a Discourse(tm) or clutter up your dashes.

I only make this point because it informs the rest of my answer to this person’s questions, and I’m gonna be really, painfully honest here: I hate the word “queerplatonic” with an unholy passion. I understand that it’s a commonly used word in the a-spec and aro-spec communities and a common self-identifier, but I still think it’s kind of, for lack of a better term, special snowflake-y. I really do. I also just don’t like looking at it or saying it, either, the way some people feel about words like “moist” or “quince” or “congeal”.I say all this as a bisexual asexual-spectrum person partnered with an agender aromantic-spectrum person. That said. No, Adam and Ronan are not in a queerplatonic relationship. Even if it wasn’t a word I detest, it would never be one I’d apply to them or one I’d imagine them applying to their own relationship. Adam was very sure he was in love with Blue when they dated, because she was his girlfriend and he was a good, though deeply troubled, boyfriend who performed the role of Blue’s First Love exceptionally well for a long time; he didn’t even realize he’d never actually been in love with Blue until he had to confront his feelings (or lack thereof) for Ronan months and months after she broke up with him. Being aro doesn’t preclude Adam from experiencing love at all, though, and he does love his friends very deeply. He can differentiate how he loves them individually, and can further draw lines between his circle of friends (Gansey et al) and other people he’s friends/friendly with (Fletcher, Tad, Dr. Poldma). Would he be in more than one relationship at once? Possibly, if all parties involved were cool with that, but it doesn’t really appeal to him. Would he self-identify as queer? Yes, if only to neatly sidestep some of the weird ways some people talk about bisexual people, bisexual men in particular. Would he call his relationships platonic simply because he doesn’t experience romantic attraction/love? No, because there’s a difference between platonic relationships and strictly sexual ones. Would he self-identify as aromantc? Probably not, because for all intents and purposes he still aspires to achieve some of the milestones of romantic relationships someday with a partner (cohabitation, marriage, homeownership, and potentially even parenthood) for financially responsible and social statis-related reasons and it’s simpler to just let people assume romance comes into play somewhere in all that.His lack of romantic attraction/feelings doesn’t mean that he would sleep with just anyone given the opportunity; he wouldn’t sleep with Gansey, for instance, even if Gansey propositioned him, because he’s not sexually attracted to Gansey and his feelings towards Gansey skew towards brotherly. He would, however, sleep with Ronan or Blue and desires to because he is sexually attracted to them and his feelings for them are not quasi-familial. Basically, the point of all this is to say that queerplatonic is not a word Adam would use to describe his relationship to anyone ever, whether or not he was/is/will be sleeping with them.Really, using the word “aromantic” for him sometimes makes things feel needlessly complicated, but it’s also the most apt. If you have any other questions about this, please send me another ask or PM and I’ll be happy to go into more detail!

#ciyh!adam #no reblogging please #ciyh!adam is aromantic #unbridld

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notsogracefulkayla-blog · 7 years

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Coming out as asexual

So I’m an asexual.

I only recently came to this conclusion as, until fairly recently, I didn’t know that there was a name for what I felt. In secondary school when all my friends were showing off their partners to me at break times and after school, I used to even recoil at public displays of affection like kissing. But this didn’t mean I didn’t want a relationship, because I did; I figured when I met the right person I wouldn’t mind all that stuff. As time went on I started to think that I was just the kind of person that didn’t enjoy public displays of affection. Yet, the idea of kissing someone when we were alone filled me with this acute sense of dread and fear: I realise now that this was down to what kissing could lead to.

In college I had my first big crush. I had found people attractive before, but their personality usually ruined it for me. The beauty of this guy was I didn’t know him very well at all and the attraction I had for him was so new that it became overwhelming. We started dating towards the end of my first year. I slowly came to realise that I didn’t like his whiny personality, or the way he looked at me when we were alone. Holding hands, hugging, kissing; it all became very uncomfortable for me because I somehow knew that he was hoping it would all lead to more. I realised very quickly that I did not want to have sex with this guy. So we lasted about 2 months, with him getting increasingly more and more impatient with me over that period to the point where he told some of the friends that I wasn’t as close with that I was treating him badly.

I remained single up until now and don’t see myself getting into a relationship any time soon. That’s not to say I didn’t try to have sex, however. By the time I entered university, I figured that I was just scared since it would be my first time, and social pressure had me feeling like this was my last chance to ‘lose my virginity’ before it became inappropriate for me to be a virgin. So one drunken night me and my best friend had sex. It was horrible, like most first times are said to be. Oh, and me and my friend are still besties; we woke up the next morning and laughed at ourselves, then continued with life as normal. A while after that I found myself becoming more and more emotionally attached to a guy who lived in the same block as me. We just talked most nights and I felt really connected to him, so I figured I wouldn’t mind having sex with him but it still felt false and wrong to me when it finally happened. Nothing came from that relationship, but again, we’re still good friends. Finally, last academic year, me and my best girl friend got drunk together and talked about one night stands. We both agreed that we wanted to try it to tick it off our bucket lists (and it was easy enough saying that but the actual application of it was a horrible experience). So we went out, not expecting it to actually happen that night (or at least I wasn’t) but we both ‘pulled’ and went back to the same house with two housemates. As soon as me and this guy were alone I realised I didn’t want to have sex. I sobered up almost immediately, and told him that it wasn’t happening, but knowing my friend was in the other room with the other guy, and that I had kind of lead this guy to believe that I would have sex with him made me stay. No matter how many times I told him no he kept coming with the ‘shhh, don’t worry, it’s okay’ before proceeding to stick his tongue down my throat. Needless to say I froze and panicked, but I still feel like the whole thing was basically my own fault.

After those three experiences I realised that in not one of them did I feel like sex was a natural, pleasant thing to do with someone you care about. Not once was I craving it. Not once did I look at any of those guys and think, ‘yes, I would love to have sex with that person’. You could argue that each of those sexual experiences weren’t exactly great; pain the first time, being dumped the second, non consensual the last. But looking back I realised that I had never once, in my entire life, felt comfortable at the idea of sex, never once had I found someone sexually attractive, and not once had a romantic relationship (in my own head) been about sex over the comfort that someone else could give me by just being there.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not aromantc. I have never had a problem hugging, kissing or holding hands with my friends when I know there are no strings attached. I would love to be in a relationship with someone who understood me and wanted what I wanted. However, I have come to understand from the online community that asexuals are a minority (not having realised that it was even a thing until about half a year ago should have been my first clue). So that’s why I’m sharing my story. I hope that someone might read it and understand, that someone might see this and realise that how they feel isn’t strange (like I did for most of my life), that someone might read this and become more aware about people like me.

If anybody would like to share their story with me I would be glad to listen. I hope you all have a nice day, and thank you for reading this far.

#asexual #lgbtq #my story #coming out #asexuality #asexual identity #activism #awareness

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