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the-girl-wh0-cries-w0lf · 9 months

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You're waiting for a train... (8)

A Son's First Hero; A Daughter's First Love

Robert Fischer x reader

description - Y/n's conversation with Robert is filled with more reality than should be in their dream.

word count - 3k

warnings - self-harm, physical violence (fake), tears, shitty parents, Robert Fischer's trauma.

a/n - so sorry this part is so late but I wanted it to be perfect so I've been working on it lot's and now I'm really happy with it!

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If you want to be added to the taglist - here

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I furiously wiped away the unforgiving tears. Fearing my weakness would be obvious to those around me. I had to pull myself together and set out on the task at hand. Dad said Fischer would remember me but, in your dreams…well…anything’s possible.

“Eames. I need some help.” I pulled myself up onto the table where he was busy working. He looked up at my cheeky face, already excited for whatever idea spilled out of my mouth.

“Is that so?”

“I want to show my dad that I can do this.” I spoke.

“You know you don’t have to.” His voice gave away a sympathetic lilt. But my sincerity lingering in my eyes made him abandon his qualms about my well-being. Instead, he braced himself for the details of my plan.

“We both know that he may be the one dreaming, but we control the visual.” He smirked, sensing my direction. “Yes, he saw my face. But maybe, for this moment, we could just…alter it?”

“Ah, come with me my young Picasso.” He led me to a three paned mirror he’d set up on a rickety desk which would give way at the slightest touch. He firmly pressed my shoulders down into the even flimsier desk chair. “Let me teach you the art of disguise.”

“So, he won’t recognise me at all?” I managed to whisper out. And grasped the hand heading for my face.

Eames smiled down at me and squeezed my hand in a gesture designed to evoke a feeling of security. “We’re not changing your whole face, just mushing it up.” He spoke. “It’s like when you see a face in a dream; you know it’s a face, but you can’t quite make out the features.”

“Like a silhouette.” I softly agreed. My mind flitted back to the man from my own dream. How his indiscernible features had subtly begun to meld, and I already felt their final product. His eyes were now as familiar to me as ever.

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*Eames pov*

I’d offered Y/n time to psych herself up for her next role in this so-called game. She couldn’t ever throw herself in, she required prep and time to create her character which would be placed into the subjects story. But as I walked away, I chanced a glance at her form which had simply walked into the room, no character necessary.

But I needn’t dwell on it for too long; I trusted Y/n. Speaking of which my firm walk was directed towards a certain leader who I needed a few words with.

Cobb and Ariadne stood locked in thought. Cobb fiddled with an object out of sight, but his hunched shoulders betrayed his nerves. If he had been stood to my liking, he would have been destroyed in the corner sobbing his little heart out. I approached from behind, a droll cough announcing my presence and more importantly, my desire to talk.

“May we have a moment, my darling.” I shot a smile Ariadne’s way. She responded to the over-enthused expression by retreating quickly. Cobb did not meet my gaze which had tracked on to him. He grasped his object even tighter with each new hand placement. He clearly already knew the topic and could feel my reaction.

“You have some nerve.” I spat.

“She nearly put this whole mission in je—” He defended with a surprising amount of conviction.

“No don’t give me that!” I fumed at his official attitude. Scoffing at his apparent corporate nature. “She made a mistake. We’ve all made them.” I tilted my head towards him in an unspoken statement. “But for some reason she is held to a higher standard than us all.”

His mouth opened in silent argument, but his false words would give away no sound. I went to turn, feeling my anger was misplaced due to the severity of this mission. For Cobb and Y/n. But I just couldn’t. I came back and leaned in further so I could attempt to meet him face to face.

“It’s all well and good you accusing her of being a child, but don’t you forget that she entered into our world a child.” My voice kept its hushed tones, but the severity seeped through it. “Whether it was her choice or not, you still let her do it.” My finger was shoved into his face, and he minutely flinched at this. I calmed myself, feeling relieved at releasing that before we continued on this mission. My head hung low when even I felt the sincerity of my words. I loved Y/n like she was my own sister, but I couldn’t deny how sick I felt when she was here with us. And now with this new revelation, I feared that Cobb, Arthur, and my self’s efforts at protection would not be enough.

I now leaned against the table, complimenting Cobb who had ignored his object in favour of supporting his hunched frame on the desk. I broke the tense silence between us.

“Do you know why she liked talking to Fischer and didn’t immediately run off.”

“Please enlighten me to the inner thoughts of my daughter.” Cobb huffed out in severe annoyance.

I took a beat, almost relishing in his cocky attitude.

“Because for once she wasn’t in the shadows anymore.” I stormed off away from the man in shameful realisation.

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*your pov*

I had placed myself centrally in the door frame, staring unforgivingly at the locked steel door. Breathing was tricky in my emotional state but the little gasps every so often at least confirmed the living state of my body. I’d altered my clothes to seem more faded and dishevelled. Cuts and bruises adorned my body, but I had forgone the use of the dreams mechanics to create that specific look on my skin. My nails still had specs of my blood underneath from where I’d dragged them down my smooth skin. Feeling pain on my unblemished skin in this fake reality spurred on my adrenaline. The lack of numbness would work in my favour. There was something about squeezing into my flesh until it speckled with purple and blue which tricked my mind into believing this reality. Then maybe I could believe what was about to happen.

Footsteps clacked up to my frame, and I turned to see Arthur, adorned like a true criminal. Gun cocked, mask prepped. I couldn’t help but bite my lip seeing his body constrained in that that dusky brown leather. My mind was flipped back to our first solo mission and the memory of embracing him and feeling that jacket beneath my fingertips. He had delivered a swift kiss to my hairline but had left in another second hoping it would slip my mind.

His hand reached to clasp my forearm, but he faltered. His eyes instead met the side of my head and eventually his lack of movement confused me so I turned to see what was the issue. His face spoke a thousand words yet his lips delivered none of them. He eventually decided upon a few.

“You don’t have to do this.” I understood the hidden end of his sentence. We both knew it was more than the simple task at hand.

“I know. But I do.” I assured him with a little smile. Hoping it would convey enough normalcy to calm his nerves. He once again took my arm and I slightly winced at the contact. His steely gaze landed on our point of contact and look of regret spilled over his features as his thumb lightly traced my skin. His hand landed on the look but before he could turn it another though bubbled up.

“Are you okay?” He looked up at me piercing through his gaze.

“Yes.” I firmly said with a softer edge. “Do you trust me?” I teased but there was a slant of sincerity within it.

“Forever.” He stated and he punctuated the end by ripping open the door, mask on, and dragging me inside.

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“Thought we’d bring you a little treat.” Arthur grunted out through his fake voice. I stumbled alongside upping the part of the damsel. The act was tied up through a calculated throw to the ground and a well-timed yelp from me. As soon as my body crashed with the floor, Robert scrambled towards me and lifted me up. We found ourselves in a position we’d been in many times before. As he took my hands to gently place me in a more comfortable position, I finally let my eyes flit up to his. But once our gazes locked a flicker of familiarity danced across his features.

My heart dropped.

The flicker burned out.

“Miss, are you okay?” He looked over my body. Took in my tattered clothes, my physical anxiety. As he landed on my various cuts and bruises, his expression darkened. It confused me to see him as he brushed his fingers over my injuries. As if willing them away with a darkened anger bubbling up. His conclusion of who I was settled on his soul.

“Yes, I’m fine.” I stuttered out. “Well, as fine as I can be.” Laying it on thick. I added a few extra shakes to the mix but he mistook this for me being cold. He quickly ripped off his jacket and softly wrapped me in it. The gesture floored me where I forgot my character as I sunk into the fabric and let my head fall to my shoulder to breathe in the unique scent.

“Why have they taken you?” Okay good, he has already assumed I’m a fellow victim.

“They’ve had me for months.” I whispered out as if trying to evade my captors wrath. “I was taken because of my father’s debt.” His face fell at the mention of my father, sensing a shared trauma between the two.

“Turns out I’m not even worth ransom.” I spluttered out a laugh amongst my crocodile tears. Seeing this he brought up his hand to wipe them away, not bearing to see me in pain.

“They could’ve killed me. They probably should’ve.” I said. “I guess they just like something pretty to look at.” My head hung. “That’s all I am; to my colleagues, to men,” My breath caught in my throat. “and to my father.” The lump in my throat dropped and I managed to muster up a sympathetic sob. Upon hearing this he carefully gathered me in his arms. Instead of waiting for permission or fearing consequences; he sensed what I needed and had relished in giving me it. I let off a few minutes to fulfil my tears and let them drip onto his shirt. But as I lay in his arms I could no longer differentiate anymore and struggled to decide whether I was lying or not.

I pulled away when I felt dried out. I giggled at the wet patch that had formed on his chest.

“I am very sorry.” I continued laughing, pointing at his shirt. He laughed once he looked down and noticed. “I dread to think how much it cost.”

“It was sacrificed for a worthy cause.” He cupped my cheek and felt the dried up tear tracks.

“It’s nice to talk to someone for once.” I spoke.

“Really?” His face fell upon hearing this.

“Yeah, even before this I didn’t really have anyone.” I shook my head to wipe away his sympathy. “I worked for my dad, but I never really felt taken seriously. Like I was a part of it. Rather just a moveable doll to be used for whatever.” I giggled out at the almost lie I had forced myself to tell.

Robert chanced a look when I had let my eyes fall to the floor. His brow furrowed at the strain of taking in my various features which were so blurry. But it was something about my voice that struck a deeply hidden part of his mind. My dulcet tones had seemed to pierce our intricate layers.

“I feel like I know you.” My heart struck cold. And the most base bodily movement ceased. “You’ve been in my mind a lot recently.” I turned to face him. My lip trembled at the possible subtext of the words he was speaking. We seemed to be locked together for an eternity, neither feeling comfortable in pulling away.

“Anyways,” I brushed off his previous thoughts by trapping him with my dozy smile. Each time I smiled he became transfixed, and it was addicting. “Apparently you’re an old hand at the father stuff.”

He nodded his head through a teeth gritting smile.

“They talk a lot when they think I’m asleep.” I feebly gestured to the locked steel door. And I turned back to see the life had left his bones once he’d considered what I’d said.

“Well, his ability at business could not be faulted. Absolute inspiration and a hard-working and powerful individual. But in the father department, there was a lot to be desired.” He shifted his position so we were now turned to face one another, with our knees gently kissing.

“Growing up, seeing my dad like that was transcendent.” He laughed thinking back fondly. “He was a god.” His head fell. “but I didn’t want a god. I wanted my daddy.” His voice took on the note of child as if that desire had halted the ageing of his heart.

My fingers creeped toward him, betraying any logical strategy in my head, and I linked them together in a silent show of comfort. His eyes crinkled when our hands met and he spoke his thanks through a gentle squeeze.

“You know.” The words fell past my lips before I could stop. “Sometimes, I think my dad is afraid of how much I love him.” I waited until he looked at my face before continuing. “But I don’t know how to do anything else, because it’s all I’ve done for the past 5 years.” I smiled through the pain at how foolish I could be.

“If he truly doesn’t want me in my life.” I searched around the room to find the end of my comment. “Then I don’t know how to live like that.” I gasped out through an unconvincing laugh.

“My love is wasted on him,” Robert hooked on and decided to alleviate me by sharing some of his own. “It only serves to hurt me more.”

“I get that.” I offered him another smile and I was greeted with the sweetest relief of his own cheerful face, even if it is only for a moment. “But love is meant to hurt. It is only the deepest wounds which have the most lasting pain.” I spoke inwardly, forgetting the conversation I was supposed to be having.

“I don’t think I’m capable of love.” He shocked me back to him with this statement. My brow furrowed at the lifeless face he beheld. He met my concerned face. “Well, those are the traits you learn. You watch from a young age, your parents and their displays. I don’t think my parents ever gave me that.” I shuffled closer so our sides met. I hoped the proximity gave him comfort. I knew my next move but I doubted everything about it. Finally conceding I lifted my hand to grasp his chin, and tilted his face towards my own. And I met it with my other hand.

“I see your capability.” I began with a whispered tone. “I see it in your eyes.” My sincerity seeped even further through my disguise. “That longing desire to be loved that only comes when one has a great amount of love to offer.” Our lips were inches away and with a slight lean we would be locked in a kiss. My neck strained to go further but I had to stop. I was being risky enough as is it is.

“Maybe we both need to realise the burden of our love for our family.” Robert softly stated and as soon as those words hit my ear, the world stopped. We’d both felt it too. The tiny sparks dancing between each point where our bodies met.

The door was ripped open and Arthur stormed in. He grabbed my arms and began to drag me away. Robert firmly protested. Trying to run after despite the threat of being shot. He pleaded with them for my safety and as I was forcibly thrown out, I noticed something in his eyes. Something I’d seen before but never this intensely.

“just do what they say.” I spluttered out before I was safely behind the door with Arthur.

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Once Arthur had removed his mask, we both stood as I caught my breath from the stressful exit. He placed his hand on my shoulder in a bid to calm me down.

“You okay?” He asked.

“Yeah. Perfect.” I gasped out.

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

“Not hurt, or he didn’t –” His eyes ran over me during his uncertain questioning.

“No. Course not. All fine.” I half-way grinned up at him. We stood in silence, as Eames walked past all ready for his role as Browning. He opened the door and went in.

“I heard you in there.” He said through a small laugh.

“Oh really?” I tried to tease but my heart wasn’t fully in it.

“Yeah. It was a bit flowery, no? Bit poetic.” He laughed out. I joined in the humour but my eyes remained stoic.

“Yeah, I guess.” I became uncertain in my skin and my erratic hand movements betrayed this. “I don’t know he liked it.” I tried to show Arthur the humour behind my words and he seemed to buy it’s surface. After the laughter died out we walked back to the group. Despite the insincerity of our discussion, it felt like I had Arthur back. I liked it.

Once we reached the group, Dad immediately ran to meet us.

“Sweetheart, well done. Thank you for that—” He reached out for my arms but I never broke my stride and simply brushed past him. Arthur followed my lead.

Cobb was left standing aimless, before grasping his rejected hand into a tight fist.

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a/n - What do you guys think of the chapter? Is Arthur redeeming himself? What about Eames defending poor y/n? Are we liking Robert and y/n's interactions?

taglist: @jonsncws @h-l-vlovesvintage @theethy @fashionki11a @felicity1994 @bearchermer @idkyoutellmesmh @mimimarvelingmarvel @butterfly-lies-chase-them-away @neotanpopper @deliriouslybi @folklorde24 @thefandomdiaries07 @viarosemcmissile @noirrose21-blog @thepoeticfirefly @xoxo-gothic-girl @skeletonwrite

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olderthannetfic · 1 year

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I wasn't an anti but I logged back into tumblr after a few years of not using it (2018-19 exodus), and that's when I first heard about the anti vs proship deal. When I was a teen I often read incest/underage/gore/abuse/rpf whatever category of things that are supposed to be brain rotting for you and I never thought twice about it. I never felt guilty, I didn't think it was wrong, and it never crossed my mind to think "this royed fic is depraved and the author a sicko". But when I logged back in, I started reading arguments from both sides.

While going through my blog, to my horror I discovered I had long ago reblogged some rick and morty ship fanart, the grandpa/son messed up relationship version. I thought what if someone finds this blog and connects it to me irl? How would I explain this? Why do I even like this? I thought they would think I was a pedophile. I quickly deleted all of it that I could find.

I also came across a bunch of kylux fanart. I had recently been seeing posts about how that was racist because of course some background white dude with two lines is in a more popular ship then the leads of color, right? Racism. I deleted those, too.

And now I feel so stupid for getting caught up in it. I never outwardly expressed any of this but it was an internal I have to be careful about what I reblog, what art I appreciate, and what I write. I chalk it up to being a year into covid and being isolated, wishing I could be physically in my uni classes, and being incredibly burnt out. I thought what people filled their heads with was really important- because so many people were not wearing masks and covid was overloading hospitals. I was incredibly worried about killing my immunocompromised coworker by giving them covid and resented everyone who wasn't following distancing guidelines (which was a lot of fellow students, my roommate, the public). And I thought if people considered more about what information they shared, and realised their capacity to harm, then this wouldn't be happening.

Plucking the potentially "harmful" things from my life felt like I was helping something. Though I'm not acting like I was operating selflessly. A lot of it was fear of how others would judge me.

After reading what you specifically had to say about kylux I realized how stupid I was being. Because the whole appeal of them is hot kylo ren and the BDSM villains fucking each other in leather. There is no other ship combo in the prequels that delivers that as naturally. It really is super lamentable that m/m juggernaut pairs trend white but it really is 1. lack of nonwhite main characters in popular media in the first place, and 2. lack of nonwhite woobies and characters that fit into that shippable mold. And these things being controlled by the profit margins of hollywood. I thank you for pointing these things out, and snapping me out of being an idiot.

A lot of people my age seem to believe you can change the world by sharing an infographic on instagram. Or here. I don't want to be too harsh on people for clinging so hard to the power of the internet for positive change!! during the most isolated moments of this pandemic, but I really recommend 1. killing the cop in your head and 2. seeing what sort connection you can make with the people in your area. I love logging off and being around people, and I love logging on to read my favs banging with tags that would make a priest infarct.

That feeling of impotence during a time of ongoing stress is exactly what gets people reaching for the fake activism. They've got to do something, and all the actually productive things are out of reach so...

Emotionally, it's just how we're built, I'm afraid.

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emeritus-fuckers · 11 months

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Howdy pal here I am again okay okay

mk so, I'd like to be matched with a papa, because I love the pookies<3

Aight, in personality, I have crippling social anxiety and I can't even talk to people in a super market to ask where a product is because that has led me to multiple panic attacks for some reason, don't ask questions, but once I am comfortable around someone that changes a lot. It takes quite a bit for me to get comfy, but once I am I'm like,,, too comfortable- Very loud, clingy, childish, over all just an asswipe. I enjoy making art and poetry and I can't make it through my day to day life without music or I'll just ascend. I have struggled with insecurity and mental issues, self-harm, etc, and have recently had a relapse episode in those things but I am too afraid to open up about that to most irl people, but things are going way better now.

On physical I am around 5,6 and I have a red wolfcut-ish thing. I enjoy baggy or anything more gothic or witch or 80s esc for clothing, and my music taste is practically everything and everything accept k-pop and dutch rap. I enjoy romance novels because I miss out on that too much irl and I enjoy horror because that's just entertaining, idk.

just random other things I thought I'd include would be I am a cardiophile, but more on the comfort and not fetish side of it. I enjoy doing hair, or playing with it, and I do that a lot to my friends when we're just chilling because it's funny. I enjoy singing and acting like I am in some sort of musical when I'm alone and I love nature, just going on walks or collecting plants. I practice witch craft, also more on the nature side of things in that way. I have volunteered multiple times at events for little children even though I hate them, it's the art side of things and I enjoyed face painting them for Halloween events or carnival things. I collect a lot of little trinkets and like giving people stupid stuff as un needed gifts and I WILL get personally offended if you do not cherish them.

There we go love goodluck<3

Your match is... Copia!

He understands what it's like to have social anxiety and he is really supportive about it. You both help each other to deal with it.

He sees you reading romance novels (which I'm pretty sure is a genre he reads too) and realises you want to expereince that. So when he is not on tour, he tries to take you out for a romantic date or do some kind of gesture whenever he can.

He loves watching movies with you, but if it’s a horror one he’ll probably jump into yo ur arms.

He's really happy that the sound of his heartbeat is comforts you. He’ll stroke your hair and smile as you curl up against him your head resting on his chest.

He loves walks with you, it gives him time away from being Papa and all the stress of the ministry. He also loves how happy you are when you get a new plant. However sometimes he has to plan a route that avoids the nursery section of Primo's garden, because you only have so much room for plants.

You two make a good team. One good example is at clergy events when you do facepainting for the children. Even though he is awkward when children are around he likes them. So you can focus on the art and not have to intereact much with them and he gets to spend time with the little ones.

One day he catches you singing and acting like you are in a musical. At first you are mortified, but then you see the huge loving smile that appears in his lips. He starts singing the other part of the song dramtically jumping up on the table and acting in character. This is now one of your favrouite things to do together, especially when it's raining outside.

He cherishes all the little gifts you give him. You become afraid he just chucks them away because you never see them again. But then you see him carefully place it in a wooden box he keeps under the bed. It's the one he takes on tour with him, filled with things to cheer him up if he feels down or misses you.

#ask #anon #ghost band #ghost bc #ghost #ghost band x reader #ghost x reader #copias fluffy asscheeks #copia #cardinal copia x reader #cardinal copia #papa emeritus IV #Match up event #Match up

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pansear-doodles · 11 months

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Art Fight OC Talks 1

This is Valentine, my oldest living OC. Although her background and designs have fluctuated throughout the years, her character and some elements (like her face) remains consistent.

I intentionally make her appear as a loose definition of a visual-wise mary sue- she's loved, has strong powers, has almost no flaws- but whats unique about her is that she goes in a reverse arc (though not a complete heelturn to her character. she just gets more sad and less naive, more accepting of reality and her flaws she constantly hides)

Valentine is an alien. she didn't come from the setting most of my characters are living on (yes. all of my original original characters are in the same universe- and there's so many more ive hidden since i dont want attacks for them in particular this year)

she is a pastry angel, a race with various appearance and physical features, who came from outer space on meteors. she in particular is a spaniel dog. she's attacked the most in my af, but a lot of people mistake her to be human or one with a human nose... i hope yall know well that its not HAHA

pastry angels can feel other peoples emotions and are naturally born charismatic. they are able to cook/bake food at an early age and smell like desserts. valentine smells like bread. they have wings which allow them to fly.

in some sort of way, i put some bits of my insecurities onto valentine. she slowly cracks and realizes that she will never be up to everyones standards, and also realizes she does not have anything for herself in mind- always wanting to help others but not herself. she does not like being alone or being left to do nothing productive. she is a workaholic people pleaser, who sets high expectations upon herself and compares herself to other angels.

and then at the crack of her height, (i dont know if i have revealed this to anyone, not even my mutuals who know of her already but), she discovers from a mothership visitor that her race is not angels but rather alien social parasites who feed themselves off emotional manipulation and is slowly taking over the world by climbing up the social hiearchies and convincing others to give to them. valentine doesnt like this revelation (nor does any other angel) and undergoes an existential crisis. but she eventually gets convinced by her friends that if she does not like it and does not agree with the big boss's plans, then she does not have to follow it.

she stays on the good side ofc, and so does a lot of the angels. they band together and defeat the big bad boss. by doing so, this extinguishes most of their powers, but Valentine doesn't mind, as long as its for the sake of protecting her friends and family.

valentine loses her ability to detect roguefort's feelings for her (she knows he has a crush on her but is waiting and doesnt want to rush) and their relationship becomes even more natural than before after learning to accept herself and be more selfish (in a good way), finally hitting it off to becoming official.

originally, valentine is cis, but for me (personal wise as her creator), i decided she's now intersex or genderfluid. i mean. i used to be cis myself, until i realized im more comfortable being the non of the binary, with a bit of female.

#oc #my art

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donnerpartyofone · 5 months

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As a casual bystander, I see a lot of dialog about the economic aspects of AI art, and comparatively little about its actual artistic value--that is, what happens when the viewer consumes it. AI imagery can have a fun, surprising impact that I would compare superficially with broken english; someone who doesn't have mastery over the conventions of a language may come up with excitingly unusual expressions that would never occur to a native speaker. When I see AI art it seems like a lot of the action comes from looking at the prompt and looking at the image and kind of measuring the distance between them, trying to imagine the program's "thought process" if I can call it that. Sometimes these things have an interesting aesthetic too, but it's hard for me to tell where that comes from or how controllable it is (and I mean the real visual effect of the thing, not like "Oh I see, the prompt included 'comic book style'" or something). But the key difference between AI art and human art seems to be the physical presence of the person. I'm not even trying to be sentimental or something, I just mean when I look at most sculptures/paintings/drawings/installations/textiles/etc, I sense the person who made them. I get an idea about the physical energy and discipline and difficulty that went into the creation of the object, and I also get a feeling about what the artist meant by what they did. As a result of who they are and what they have experienced, they developed something that they wanted to say so badly that they were willing to undergo a major trial to say it in a highly specific way.

To be fair intentionality is really slippery and hard to prove unless the individual artist has been very explicit (and even then you can't always trust them, or you can decide their intention isn't as important as your interpretation), but to some degree the viewer is always helplessly projecting something about themselves onto the art and/or their personal construction of who the artist is. You look at art and you estimate what kind of experience that artist seems to have had, and your emotional and interpretive responses to the art naturally draw on your own feelings and memories. That whole part seems to be missing from AI art; of course there's the human composing the prompts, so there's a trace of psychology in that, but the actual creation of the work (as far as I can tell) is done by a program that is not reflecting on its own history, or the personal sacrifices that it made to build its skillset, or its feelings about its own social/political/historical context. Basically there is nothing the program is wrestling with, that the viewer might relate or react to.

Of course art is always a rorschach test on some level, and there is no law that says you have to view works of art as records of biographical fact. Actually there's a whole aspect of art history writing that totally rejects personal and psychological suppositions about art. One of my college advisors loved me when he saw my writing potential, and then completely turned on me when he realized that I was only interested in (or only capable of) a psychoanalytic style of interpretation (my thesis was on a selection of Crumb comics where the artist or his stand-in rides on or inside of powerful female bodies, driving them like tanks or jets, which I thought suggested fear, awe, and jealousy, not just garden variety misogyny). He was a pure historian; you were only allowed to do purely material investigations of the art object, and you could only talk about its larger historical context. He had done some big project on a famous painting cycle with an exclusive focus on the state of industrial paint production at the time of the work. In one of my first classes with him we all went to a museum where everyone was assigned a short essay on one piece there, and the rule was you could ONLY do a formal description, there could be NO interpretation. I wish I could think of the name of it, but my piece was just a clear plastic tube that was stuffed full of rubbish. Coming up with a compelling description of this thing was borderline impossible, I basically just had to list as many pieces of garbage as I could identify--which sounds sort of poetic and funny now, but I'm sure it wasn't when I wrote it. I don't know how much I learned from doing that, but I thought about this professor when I saw the Warhol Diaries docuseries recently. There's a late episode where they talk about Warhol's famous statements about wanting to be a machine and insisting that his art has no personal meaning, and a bunch of experts argue convincingly that his work is actually loaded with personal material, anxiety, longing, shame, etc--it's encoded with the things that Warhol was too afraid to say out loud in a literal way. One particular collector finds all of this totally repulsive and unnecessary, as if it's just a stain on the formal quality of Warhol's output. His way of seeing things is totally valid and not uncommon, but it's curious that he gets so angry when people see Warhol himself in the work. Now I wonder if and how this lens could apply to looking at AI art. Is it possible to do that same kind of purely formal analysis if you don't have an intimate understanding of the AI's mechanics? If it's not possible, and it's still IMpossible to view AI art the same sympathetic way we view human-produced art, what is left?

My question is not rhetorical, and I'm not saying that AI art can't be art because of the absence of human psychology; I don't know if I'm ready to make that conclusion. I think I'm saying that if AI art IS art, then consuming and appreciating it requires a really different philosophy than what most of us are used to using. It might even require a different definition of what makes something art. Maybe AI can produce art, but not art as we have known it. Are we sort of looking at AI art the way we look at shapes formed by clouds? That one looks like a heart. That one looks like a bunny. That one looks like a guy, but he's got too many fingers. My analogy is not perfect because there IS someone whose input inspires the shapes, but there is a similar entropic quality to what shapes are actually produced and why. If there is a God up there molding clouds into familiar shapes, then His thought process is probably beyond our comprehension. Our perception of familiar shapes may be pure projection.

#excuse me i have no idea what i'm talking about

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chikuto · 10 months

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Hello I saw your post about your breakthrough with ADHD and art and!!! Yeah!!! Similar hat!!!

Something I think that goes into it as well is the idea that ADHD people are undisciplined, like 'oh they're so smart in class but just don't apply themselves' but it's because (at least in my experience) our 'applying ourselves' looks different than what the typical (capitalist) school system demands! I work in short bursts of like 10-30 minutes and break doing nothing and do this for Hours, and this extends to working on a project for days and then not doing anything for weeks before picking it up again. The rhythm is chaos and there is no predicting it but to me it's important not to force myself into doing something I don't want to because it literally will not work and will ONLY make me miserable!!

I tried to be a semi-freelance artist in my gap year and early uni years, and had schedules for myself for how much to draw and practice and especially post down to the week and guess what happened? Literally nothing, I didn't follow that schedule at all, I procrastinated and didn't do much and felt incredibly guilty for not being productive or a proper artist, and ended up burning out within a couple years and did basically no art last year, I've only got back into it this year because I've let myself do it because I Want to and not force myself to, it's no longer a Priority task in the sense of 'this has to be done' and now more a priority in the sense of 'i do this because it makes me happy'.

It was interesting reading your post because yes! I resonate! And feel like I've been in that position and have now come to find ways that I can still draw that work for me and mean I enjoy it and don't fight my brain because doing that for my entire childhood (when you're told you're inherently just lazy and need to work harder than oh boy do you run yourself into the ground) made me absolutely miserable and unable to do anything. Part of my getting back into art was accepting the chaotic and strange way I worked and just letting that flow and not fighting it, as Frustrating as it could get sometimes and as unhelpful it was to a 'traditional' model of work that industry demands.

Idk if this is helpful but you mentioned being unsure how to go from where you are after this revelation and I guess all i want to say is: figure out your workflow and Do Not Fight It. ADHD brain is distracting, yes, but it is also the most stubborn bitch ever and fighting it will just make you unhappy and tired. Figure out how you work best in a way that keeps you content and happy and work with it.

Of course there can be discipline aspects there too; I do find pushing myself to get up and pick up the sketchbook when I am feeling lazy is good, there's definitely elements where you can push yourself just to do a little bit more or work a little bit harder - but only to the point it still works for you. Once it gets hard, stop fighting and let yourself flow naturally.

Ajdhjsja idk if this makes sense I've just done a lot of thinking about this over the years and hoped it might be a bit helpful

I feel you man. Schedules are foreign things to me, and trying to make one for myself is both physically and mentally painful. When I was doing my webcomic, holding myself accountable day in and day out to pump out page after page after page made me so ill. Even when I tried to take it slower and make it easy on myself, I would just get laden with guilt. I had to put it down for my own health and figure out what was wrong with me.

I have received the "Don't Fight It" advice from other ADHD friends before, and i'm STILL FIGURING OUT HOW TO APPLY IT TO MYSELF ... like i said, there are always gonna be external factors that impede your ability to do what you love, even without ADHD (living situation, general mental/physical health, etc).

I definitely wanted to post this ask though, because I hope other people can also benefit from this advice. It's definitely helpful, and after reading everyone's responses to that post, I think it's something I should start being more mindful of too. Thank you for sharing your experience!

#long post

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miru667 · 4 months

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✏️✂️🥊🧠

Yay thank you shakooo~! 😊

✏️ - How often do you draw/write about the OC?

Audrey Grace is my muse!! I don't draw often but when I do it's almost always Audrey, so she's my default drawing subject now, and I never get bored of drawing her either. I want to draw her 10000 more times I just never have the energy or time because of work. 😭 As for writing, if RP counts then I'm pretty much rping her every single day with my friends. RP is my other main hobby besides art and she's currently in 7 separate RPs right now ahhhha! 😆 They go at different paces though so it's not as much as it seems.

✂️ - What is one of your OC’s worst memories?

Oh oops she has a lot of horrible memories TTWTT Not only because she's been through a zombie apocalypse but also because in Beach AU she died painful gruesome deaths everyday for like a year due to a death curse skjdfhgdjl one time she got stuck in a hotel elevator and it plummeted 15 floors and crashed into the basement and it left her body in shreds and then she woke up as a ghost and had to limp around still in that broken form, it was awful (BUT IT WAS SOOOOOOO FUN TO RP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😂). Anyway, anyone can send me more ✂️ emojis and I can share more bad memories haha

🥊 -What do they love to do? What do they hate to do?

What she loves to do: Many things 😭 She loves doing her hobbies (painting, piano, guitar, reading), she loves being active (rollerblading, biking, dancing), she loves to try new food, she loves to learn new things, she loves to feel useful and productive by doing her chores and taking care of her plants at home and helping out friends. She LOVES having a good time with friends irl, Audrey is an extrovert and with her closest friends she loves showing physical affection like hugs and holding hands and clinging to their arms. Oh, and she loves to drive, it makes her feel independent and she enjoys the wind in her hair.

What she hates to do: Arguing, and leaving things on a bad note, so she tries to avoid it, but it's hard when she tends to be an antithetical girl at heart. Her silence does her a disservice sometimes.

🧠 - What do you like most about the OC?

She's versatile...I feel like I can put her in any AU and draw her any way I want because she's not just a single trope character; she can be anything, like barbie. I also like that she's helped me appreciate nature more and become braver at trying new foods. I used to not care about things like flowers or gardens or sceneries at all until I rped Audrey loving those things which then influenced ME to love those things (and also because they make me think of her). I also don't embarrass myself as a guest in other people's houses anymore because I'm slightly less picky about food now because Audrey eats EVERYTHING. And I also feel like I'm nicer now...I always try to rp Audrey as a kind person so that's rubbed off on me :,) Life hack: if you want to improve yourself, make an OC you want to be more like and get obsessed about them. This also makes me laugh because everyone says we put part of ourselves into our OCs but I feel like Audrey has influenced me more than the other way around. xD

Link to ask game questions: https://www.tumblr.com/miru667/738658174946721792/ask-game-for-someones-ocs?source=share

#audrey grace #miruask #shakooo #long post #THANK YOU AGAIN SHAKO AHHH

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steamingowl · 9 months

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Unusual Muse Associations

Tagged by @quilleth!! Thanks for giving me the opportunity of talking about my dear babies ♥

I of course am going to use my OCs Seth and Valak, protagonists of my lastest brainrot

Let's start with Seth! Fire demon, bard, very lively and charming. Valak's childhood friend.

I have a playlist of Valak and Seth here

SEASONING: He likes spicy!!

WEATHER: Warm and sunny. He probably gets gloomy when it's rainy

COLOR: Golden! He adores gold and golden. He also likes light blue very much

SKY: Sunny! He likes evenings and sunsets

MAGICAL POWER: As he would say 'Do you happen to know what is music? Yeah? And a fire demon? Nice. Have you ever seen a Fire demon playing music? I'll let you know what can happen when it's done in the right way ;D

HOUSE PLANT: He probably likes lilies, but he's more a going outside kind of guy, so he prefers trees over anything, especially the flowery ones

WEAPON: A violin! His violin bow has the shape of a fine sword too

SUBJECT: Music! And drama class

SOCIAL MEDIA: I'm afraid he'd be a tiktok guy too. He'd share his sick covers and he'd be quite popular for being far too pretty and charismatic ohoho

MAKEUP PRODUCT: MMM He isn't a makeup guy, but he'd like to use a bit of makeup to make his face glow a bit

CANDY: He likes hard candy! And also little puffy pastries with honey. Honey probably is his favorite

FEAR: Being exposed. Not having any protection at all. Not being able to control his own body. Trusting somebody who secretly just wanted to fuck him up. So in a word? Being defendless

ICE CUBE SHAPE: Little moons?? 'Oh, how cute!'

METHOD OF LONG-DISTANCE TRAVEL: Carriage/horse!

ART STYLE: He'd adore Sorolla's shapes and colors

MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURE: Dragon

PIECE OF STATIONERY: Quills!

THREE EMOJIS: 😽😏🌸

CELESTIAL BODY: Nothing, he just is the gentle sky. Always there, like a cloack that can protect and make you feel warm in the coldest nights.

Valak's turn! He used to be a clan leader. He's a warrior, a legend, an hero. Lost a fight a few months ago which made him lose his territory and made him be exiled by the 'new leader' to the human realm. He's hating it so far, acting very bitter and a second away from dying of boredom (Second pic)

SEASONING: Herby, a bit spicy. He likes curry flavour

WEATHER: Warm. He doesn't do very well when it's cold.

COLOR: Blue! He also likes pink.

SKY: Sunny, Valak also likes when there are a few white clouds in the sky.

MAGICAL POWER: He doesn't have much magic. A bit of air powers, but they are not very developed. He can control a bit of hypnosis as demon, but normally he leans a lot in his physical attacks and force brute.

HOUSE PLANT: He'd like plants with *big* leaves

WEAPON: His firm weapon is a Kusarigama, but he likes knives too

SUBJECT: P.E. !

SOCIAL MEDIA: MMMM Instagram, maybe. Just to show pics of plants, nature and some animals. He'd have like 2 likes per publication 'tho.

MAKEUP PRODUCT: He likes eyeshadow! He IS a makeup guy and he won't hesitate in do the makeup of all his friends

CANDY: Valak doesn't have a sweet tooth... He likes candied fruits and fruits with honey from time to time 'tho. He also likes to eat fruits everyday. Peaches and apples are his favourites.

FEAR: Not being able to protect or save a loved one.

ICE CUBE SHAPE: he'd make a little snort laugh if he eves sees little ice cubes with dick shape

METHOD OF LONG-DISTANCE TRAVEL: Carriage/horse! Nowadays by walk... Although I'd like him to have a scooter (One of the few cool things humans have, in his opinion)

ART STYLE: He'd like realistic art style. He's a simple guy

MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURE: White tiger?

PIECE OF STATIONERY: Craft paper

THREE EMOJIS: 👿😒🐅

CELESTIAL BODY: The hazy moon

I tag @soturisi @leporidactic @nooterino ! Have fun talking about any of your fav charries)! OC or fandom wise!

#oc #oc art #art #valak #seth #kitty in bloom

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anonymergremlin · 6 months

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When I created my Lies of P OC Alice, I tried to include as much as possible from the original 'Alice in the Wonderland'-Fairytale.

So let me share some details about her:

Name: I named her Alice Mary Carroll, so her first name is after the famous figure Alice and her last name being the last name of the authors pseudonym.

Her design: I tried to keep her natural hair color blond or at least light (Doesn't mean I don't love dark haired Alice from Madness Returns hehe). She has light blue eyes, a little to light to give of a lost feeling, something that makes them look empty. Her braided her has that little black ribbon at the end which I associate with Alice.

Her colors: She wears a lot of black and white combined with blue colors. Lighter once for when she is at the hotel and darker once for when she is out fighting as a stalker.

Companions: Alice has three puppets she build from scratch. White rabbit, cheshire cat and caterpillar. The first two are based on pets she used to have. White rabbit was an albino rabbit, a present from her parents to hopefully make their child stop asking for more attention and to support her ' nurturing ' side (wanted her to become a good wife). Cheshire cat on the other side was a present from a business partner from a country in the west, a maine coon cat who looked like he is smiling/smirking all the time. The caterpillar wasn't a pet but Alice first try of a wind-up puppet when she was younger. She later turned it's remaining parts into a puppet like the others.

Her family: Alice's parents are from a country in the north. Came to Krat because of their business. They have a clothing business, high quality products for the higher society. Always dressed in fine dark red, the Red 'Queen' and 'King'. Both of them don't show any affection or attention towards their daughter believing that hair living in such a "wonderland" made out of money and a position in a higher class is already enough. In return they expect her to become a fine young woman, a good wife and mother for her future husband and their kids. Trying to shape her after their desire. Alice once told Romeo and Carlo that her mother looks to her like the 'Queen of Hearts' after looking a poker card deck.

Alice hobbies: Like I said. Her family tried to shape Alice. But she has her own dreams. She loves mathematics, physics, engineering and the arts (hobbies which are really close to the author's profession and hobbies). Her dream was to become an inventor for things that make other happy, like kids toys.

Alice as in the past and present: The former Alice used to be a crybaby. Someone who was often afraid of talking about her feelings, wishes and dreams. But she was also really friendly, kind and sweet towards the people she cared for and who cared for her. Present Alice is different. She still shows kindness towards those she cares but her heart is cold when it comes to being... Really friendly and sweet. The events changed her. You could say since original Alice had a sister, this Alice also has one. Herself. The Alice from the present is the one she protects by trying her best to help Krat, to not let the chaos destroy what good memories she had. But the current Alice, she is not the same as her. She is the Alice who went from the mad wonderland into a mad nightmare.

Well yeah, thanks everyone for reading this. It's still not everything about her but... Yeah. Thanks for reading. 👉👈 and sry for typos.

#lies of p #lies of p oc #just me sharing things #alice in the wonderland based

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rosekasa · 3 months

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ive yet to finish an art project since december bc ive been so down abt my work. im startjng to feel like a one trick pony, like i can only make one good art im proud of and never again. each type i set out to make something it just doesn't turn out good so i delete it and start again and rinse and repeat. its nice to know that its not just me who feels this way

baby you are NOT alone!! at a time where most of the art we consume is through the norms of social media it can be so hard to remember that art is not just about making a good 'finished product' and that your value as an artist isn't about your work looking like those of the people you see with thousands of followers. feeling proud of your work comes from feeling proud of yourself. i have so many pieces that objectively are Not good but i feel filled with so much love when i look at them because i remember how happy i was while creating it. but then i have pieces that have gotten thousands of reblogs but i physically cannot bring myself to look at them for too long because while i was drawing it i was constantly thinking about whether it will look good, whether it will fit the idea i had in my head, etc. etc.

I don't know if it's any consolation to hear this, but the feelings triggered in you when you see a result you don't like are not concrete nor are they a true depiction of who you are. you are a wonderful, skilled, creative artist and i can say this to you without knowing who you are and knowing your work because to be that kind of person is to think you are that kind of person. the more you tell yourself not to be nervous about your art not turning out good and focus on creating the things that make you feel joy with confidence, the more your art WILL start to look good, i promise.

i wanted to share some examples with my own art and my feelings about it so if you're not interested don't worry qjkskw im just putting it under here

i think this was my most reblogged piece in 2022 but i dont think ive seen it closeup since then because it does not make me feel good when i look at it. when i sat down to draw this i was so stressed about making it look a certain way. i was trying to use all this technical knowledge like forumlas to make it look 'perfect' but at the end it just felt like a drawing that wasn't even mine. i do like the sky a lot though because painting skies like that have always made me feel really happy.

same situation with this piece. i had the vague idea in my head but it felt like i had to make it a chore to make sure it looked good. i kept trying to find the 'perfect' references and trying to copy tutorials id seen about anatomy to force it to look good but again this just doesn't feel like my art because i think so much of it came from what i thought i shouldve been doing rather than what felt good. it felt like i was trying to prove myself

i did this in an hour and a half and i thought it was going to be a warmup ahkdka. i completely switched off my brain while i did this. i loved this pose from ikari gozen and so i sketched it out really fast in a way that felt so. easy? natural? the rest of the details sort of just fell into place. that's not to say i didnt try to use the same techniques that i did for the other two, but this time i trusted that those techniques that i learned would naturally come to me while i worked while i had the end result in my mind. when i look at this piece i just remember how intuitive the process felt, how i would zoom out of the canvas and look at it and think 'omg wait what if i try that thing i saw on that youtube tutorial...' and how i wasnt trying to prove to myself this was a good drawing, but for the way i felt natural and happy prove it to me instead

this one too ❤️ i have improved my anatomy a lot since this piece but i still use it on all my portfolios and commission examples because it feels like such a good depiction of how i want MY art to feel to me when i see it. i love ladynoir so much and i love oblivio so much and that's genuinely all i was thinking about while drawing this. i didn't want to make it perfect, i just had a vague image of what i wanted it to be like in my head but i was just so excited to be doing oblivio art that i totally forgot about stressing about everything else and just let the brainrot power me HDKDKA. the process was so messy but it felt a lot like solving a puzzle, you know? i didnt need to force any techniques onto it to make it look good because i trusted that the image would already be there, i just needed to find it

#ask #anon

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theofficialayah · 1 year

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I chose to create a collage that makes me feel hopeful, inspired, optimistic, and at peace. Notice the word inspire in the new magazine clipping. I decided to add a twist with physical art and web art editing. Creating this piece.

(A short Book) hehe:)

I hope to highlight within the piece a series of eerie hope. Such piece might at fist glance look very hopeless or tragic. Yet, I view it as hope and inspiration for a better future. Within my piece you’ll notice school supplies, dirt, trash, and the distinctive theme of Boneventure values. In the middle you will see the ministry chapel a key component to Bonaventure’s values and tradition. Although, I am not a religious student I have a deep appreciation for culture and theology. That being said many whom attend St Bonaventure know of the imprint of religion on the university. Such imprint makes a great sense of peace and love within St. Bonaventure. A feeling of simplicity as the friars stay true to their humbled lifestyle to the preservation of nature due to the universities lineage. I wanted to highlight this as In recent years I’ve observed St.Bonaventure becoming corrupted by hopes of advancement, expansion, and financial abundance. It’s no secret any business or corporation would need to have a financial plan or aspiration for growth within the business. However, where is the distinction of values and where do we realize such “progress” may only take away the values and traditions that have founded St. Bonaventure. I bring awareness to this unconsciously, as I was found stressed about not having magazines. I initially hypothesized that I’d make a virtual collage of things that made me happy. Simple and done so yet, a part of me felt I wouldn’t get the physical prompt completed as a magazine was suggested. Therefore I set out in search of any magazines I could find one, found at safety and security another, found at my counselors office. Both magazines are St. Bonaventure publications. Yet, one explicitly highlighted the advancements St. Bonaventure is hoping to bring to the university in the near future. Such plans include but are not limited to “a state-of-the-art” broadcast production suite and newsroom for the Jandoli school of communication, a 10,000 sqft Athletics Performance Center “five times the size of the current weight room facility” with a turf field “large enough to accommodate Division l sports” claiming the new advancements will “bring Bonnie’s teams out of the harsh Western New York winter element and allow for year-round training”. Upon first glance this seems exciting and transformative. Yet, it’s everything Boneventure is not. Creating a indoor facility so Bonnie’s don’t have to go outside? Or so you don’t have to pay for labor to care for outside elements? Whatever the cause, I believe we are stepping away from what makes Bonaventure Bonaventure. Simply seeking to “raise $125 million in investing* into Bonaventure” when we’re already more than well-off.” Sounds odd to me. In addition the article claims that “ your campaign gift will help build a Bolder Bonaventure by: Modernizing facilities and enhancing technology, transforming St. Bonaventure’s athletic facilities” Such claims seem to be changing the Bonaventure experience overall into a more modern one. I don’t know I just feel off about this. Especially because the plan for the athletic center would either one knock down over 20+ trees where I and many students have relaxed in the field of trees or two knock out a parking lot. Which one do you think Boneventure will choose to eliminate?

#liveyourbestlife #deforestation #modernization #growth

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nikkeisimmer · 2 years

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OC Tag Interview - River (nee McIrish) Chikamori

1. What is your name?

River Chikamori. I was born a McIrish.

2. Do you know why you were named that?

It's a nature name, I'm not sure why my late mom picked it out for me, but I like it. And now I wouldn't be able to answer by any other name anyways.

3. Single or taken?

Like my husband said, "Taken...very happily taken... Thank you very much."

4. Stop being a Mary Sue!

If I was a Mary Sue, I'm probably doing a pretty bad job of it right now.

5. What’s your eye color?

Green...my husband says that he loves staring into them. I don't mind in the slightest.

6. How about hair color?

Red. Not going to say otherwise.

7. Have you got any family members?

Asian families are big families and well, for the longest time, it was just me, my mom, Molly and Sandi, well, Sandi's all grown up and fled the nest and Molly, well unfortunately her and Uncle Satoshi are now gone. It's really sad to realize that everyone is getting older and some of them that we grew up with aren't around anymore. Hopefully Ojiisan Yasunobu and Obaasan Susan are around for a long time yet. But...(a bit emotional) I still do miss my Mom...a lot.

8. Oh, how about pets?

Not sure right now. Just taking it one day at a time and we'll see what happens. Pets are a major commitment.

9. That’s cool, I guess. Now tell me something you don’t like

Some sims don't get the idea that "No means No..." I'm seriously thinking about getting an unlisted number.

10. Do you have any activities/hobbies that you like to do?

Painting, sculpting...spending time with my hubby.

11. Have you ever hurt anyone in any way before? Physically

Been tempted with a couple of paparazzi, but ...no.

12. Ever… killed anyone before?

Not that I recall...

13. What kind of animal are you?

I really have no idea...but my husband...well...let's just say that I consider him a tiger.

14. Name your worst weaknesses

My husband's errrr...um...Key Lime Pie...yeah...that's it...

15. Do you look up to anyone at all?

I look up to my Mom, she raised me from the time that I was born, all by herself and she wasn't lucky enough like me to have a husband who is faithful and sticks around to take responsibility for the children he's fathered.

16. Are you straight, gay or bisexual?

I have a husband so understandably, I'm straight.

17. Do you go to school?

Like my husband, I couldn't wait to get out of school and live my life. We both went to university together and well, we both have arts degrees. It's good enough. Not planning on going back at any point as of yet.

18. Ever want to marry and have kids one day?

I'm happily married and have had four wonderfully darling children who are growing up into capable young men and women. I think we've done good.

19. Do you have fangirls/fanboys?

I wouldn't know...really, I don't see myself being that much of a celebrity.

20. What are you most afraid of?

I'm was afraid of not having lived a fulfilling life, but the operative word is was. I've raised four wonderful children, have a darling husband that I love dearly and I think I'm living the best possible life that I could have.

21. What do you usually wear?

I'm usually in jeans and a red Canada 150 t-shirt.

22. What’s one food that tempts you?

Key Lime Pie (laughs self-consciously)

23. Am I annoying you?

Nope...I rarely find myself getting annoyed.

24. Well, it’s not over!

Keep going...

25. What class are you (low class, middle class, high class)?

I don't find that classifying people as certain economic classes as very constructive. I think we should all work together to bring into fruition a productive society.

26. How many friends do you have?

My circle of friends are the ones that are most important to me: my husband, my kids, I wish that my Mom could be here to see how Haruo's and my kids have grown into such wonderful young adults..

27. What are your thoughts on pie?

Well...unlike my husband who's mind is in the gutter half the time, I have enjoyed buzzberry pie once in a while. It's delicious.

28. Favorite drink?

I'm never awake without my cup of coffee in the morning.

29. What’s your favorite place?

Like my husband, I think we both hang out at Divisadero until they kick us out and lock the doors.

30. Are you interested in anyone?

Oh, maybe a few platonic crushes on a few movie stars, but my husband is really all I need and he's all I've ever wanted.

31. That was a stupid question.

I don't know if I should answer that...

32. Would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean?

River: "Lake; but unfortunately somebody who shall remain nameless put sharks and crocodiles in the family pond. The crocs have taken two raccoons and a chipmunk and they're starving." (Haruo looks innocent and whistles a two-note "I didn't do anything" whistle.)

33. What’s your type?

"Strong...handsome, built like a tank..." ~sidelong glance at her husband.

34. Any fetishes?

Hmmm, was this a raw-mag interview by any chance. (smiles winsomely). Mining for the dirty details, huh? Well, let's just say that size is no problem with my husband.

35. Camping or indoors?

I pick camping (except in winter)

#sims 3 #sims 3 gameplay #river mcirish #ts3 #sims 3 storytelling #the chikamori selfacy #river and haruo #sims 3 oc tag

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abishekmuses · 1 month

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Marketing is seduction

Style is a virtue - it's an external indicator of the lens through which you view reality, events and situations. It's the "Frame" that you inhabit - it's an expression of your aesthetic ideals - it shows the world where you find beauty. It shows the world the internal cadence - the tempo that marks the beat of your movements through life. More importantly, it reflects your capacity to appreciate beauty and your commitment towards embodying beauty and the extent to which you are willing to go for beauty.

We are fart-bags that are filled with flesh that's slowly rotting. We emanate odours, burp and one day, we'll die. Before that, depending on how unlucky our lot is, we suffer a bunch of ignominies - injuries, heartbreaks, embarrassments - we shit our pants, we get hard for people that don't want anything to do with us naked - we get jacked up wanting to see people naked - people who themselves will one day get old and need diaper changes or surgeries where their shit comes out through tubes on their abdomens. Why am I painting this grisly picture?

Because none of this stuff is news - we all know this. This is the nature of our physical reality as humans and this truth isn't lost on most of us. However, there is still is extraordinary capacity for style that we possess - This capacity to appreciate beauty - to do things with a sense of aesthetic - to " present" ourselves as works of art rather than as stinking pieces of meat.

Beauty makes life beautiful - duh! Ok let me try another way. Beauty makes life tolerable. Why do any of the things we do if we don't do them beautifully? Every moment, a human has the choice to frame things in such a way - do things in such a manner - that it can be elevated to poetry.

Again, none of these ideas are new. We know how the act of drinking coffee can be an act of ugly compulsion - think lines of irritated, haggard looking people at an airport starbucks waiting to catch an early morning flight - or an exercise in love, style and aesthetic bliss - think of someone who wakes up, works out, showers, does his hair up just right - puts on a clean white tee shirt and crisply ironed chinos - and with meticulous precision, arranges his cup, his spoon, his milk jug, his coffee grinder - and goes about infusing as much love and devotion as possible into making that cup of coffee - pouring his attention into every single step involved - doing it with a sense of care like not getting a microscopic part of the process perfectly right would be the end of the world. That's what i mean by elevating actions - making poetry out of life.

i'm not speaking about OCD though. that's just as unaesthetic as being slapdash as far as Im concerned. Insouciance is attractive. Devotion with insouciance - now that's poetry.

I think seduction is closely tied to this. An expert seducer is someone who values aesthetics - he lives it and breathes it. He might not even necessarily understand it as such. But his movements, his life possess a quality of otherworldliness. a sense of cinematic allure. A sense of art. Something elysian, astral, supernal. A sense of something immortal and infinite. Something that isn't so immutably beset by the banal, the mortal, the rotting and the mundane.

I feel like marketing is very similar to seduction in this sense. marketing is all about framing things - It's about creating something a bit more ethereal around commodities/products/services -which are just banal things.

A product is a commodity. It belongs to the realm of flesh and bones. A brand is something undying - it belongs to the realm of demigods. It is something supernal. Something astral. Something that is nebulous, subtle and powerful.

I'm writing all this just to get down some ideas that I've been working with. This is an attempt to publicly post my process.

I came across the term public journal recently - I guess this is an attempt to have one of those myself.

Paralysed with potential - This is an itneresting idea

Best writers make errors -e diting is key

Excitement is actually a really subtle form of fear - when it doesn't allow us to settle into the present moment - I catch myself these days with a feeling that i would traditionally label as "positive" - a feverish sense of excitement - like hey "I'm pumped!!!" - but upon closer inspection, it's an attempt to move away from the present moment. It's a refusal to accept the intensity of a given moment and relax into it - accept it. It's using the mind to project an imaginary future where the intensity of internal state in this moment is used to create positive fantasies in the future - subtly suggesting to yourself - i'll be happy and fulfilled then" - subtly sowing seeds for waking up the next morning (or whenever) with regrets for not inhabiting that fantasy reality.

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toughgirlchallenges · 5 months

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Josephine Collingwood - Middle-Aged Mother of Three. Former Mountain Rescuer, Wilderness Addict, Lover of Nature. Embracing Adventure, Inspiring Others, and Capturing Life's Beauty Through Photography.

Josephine in her own words:

“I’m a middle aged mother of three. Also, adventurer, rock climber, former Mountain Rescuer, wilderness addict, lover of Nature, doer. Oh, and professional author and award-winning photographer.

Many hats, but a common thread of being outdoors, helping people and sharing a love of wild places.

Having moved on from the confines of Mountain Rescue, I am on a journey with Mountain Training Association to get qualified so that I can introduce people, and especially women, to the indescribable benefits of outdoor adventure.

Too many women feel that it is beyond them. I want to show that it is not.

I love polar adventure and have been to Norway many times and skied across Svalbard on a 9 day expedition.

Mountains, moors, wilderness, old mines and rock faces all vie for my time so that it feels there is never enough!

My mantra is: “Do it now. Life is too short.”

I am not one for “ests” the longest/fastest/highest etc. To me, it is all about being there, in that moment.

My work as an author and publisher includes the Dartmoor Tors Compendium, the Official Visitor Guide to Dartmoor National Park and the Geology of Dartmoor. I also design unique infographics and poster art about Dartmoor in particular. My photography, when not illustrating books, is photographing architectural properties and interiors. Mainly though, photography is about showing how beautiful and amazing our world is.”

***

Don't miss out on the latest episodes of the Tough Girl Podcast, airing every Tuesday at 7am UK time. Hit the subscribe button to stay updated and connected.

Join us in our mission to increase the amount of female role models in the media especially in relation to adventure and physical challenges. Show your support by visiting www.patreon.com/toughgirlpodcast. Thank you for helping to make change happen.

Show notes

Who is Josephine

Wearing lots of hats

Her love for going out and exploring and spending time in wilderness

Studying geo-physics at university down in London

Making the move to Devon

Deciding to re-train in photography

How her career focuses on photography, design and being outdoors

Having 3 grown children

Her love and passion for the outdoors

Growing up in Acton, London

Spending more and more time in Dartmoor

Age 14, having the opportunity to do an outward bound course (3 week residential)

Discovering different possibilities and wanting to live a life outdoors

Meeting her husband at the Officer Training Core at University

Making the decision to move to Devon to raise her family

Asking herself the question - what does she really want to do

Buying an old barn to renovate, while raising 3 children and going back to college for 3 years to study photography and media production

Why we have to take a risk and make things happen

Not doing any adventures for 20 years while raising the kids

Starting to do more solo activities at 52

Booking to do a polar training course with Newland Expeditions

Spending time walking on Dartmoor

Losing her mum to Ovarian Cancer

Skiing across Svalbard on a 9 day expedition (being the only woman and one of the oldest there)

Camp life, dealing with Polar bears and why it’s so challenging

Imposter Syndrome?

Feeling like an explorer and an adventurer

Cycling the Hebridean Way, Scotland 2022

Being inspired by watching the Reality TV Show Castaway (2000)

Dealing with the tough days while on challenges

Suffering from covid

Challenges with mental health and seeking therapy

Dealing with setbacks and failure

Spending time in the Cairngorms, Scotland and going exploring

Doing her Hill & Moorland Assessment

Wanting to train for her Mountain Leader (ML) Award

Her healing process and wanting to learn new skills

Trying to identify what you want to be

Doing what’s achievable first

Signing up for the Rock Climbing Instructor Course in 2022

Wanting to share her love for the outdoors and encourage more people to spend time outside

Mountain Rescue and the training program

Hitting a glass wall and dealing with bad people management

Deciding to resign from Mountain Rescue

Advice and tips for other women who are in a similar situation

Not wanting to rock the boat and what she would do differently now

Why the old school way of thinking has to change

Why we don’t have to put up with bad behaviour

How the ML training is going

How you can connect with Josephine

The meaning behind the name ‘Tavicinity’

Using Instagram in the old fashioned way - black and white photos

The importance of learning how to navigate

Why you shouldn’t compare yourself to other people

Why you should try something new

“Make it happen and do it for you”.

Social Media

Website: www.tavicinitypublishing.co.uk

Instagram: @tavicinity

Check out this episode!

#podcast #women #sports #health #motivation #challenges #change #adventure #active #wellness #explore #grow #support #encourage #running #swimming #triathlon #exercise #weights

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femdomliterature · 6 months

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FemLit 0007 - How to Properly "Edge" Him

Many Sites on the Internet talk about Ruining a Male Orgasm but Don’t actually Discuss the More Effective/Efficient Enslaving Femdom Art Discussed Here - What Most Ladies Are Much More Interested in I Find, is Routine & Habitual “Edging” (Subjugation) of Their Males Psychologically. That’s Playing with Him, Fondling Him, and Masturbating/Stimulating Him - Right to the “Edge” of Orgasm but NOT Actually Letting Him Cum.

Along with Daily Teasing (Physical & Visual), the Trick in the Beginning While Training His Psyche, is Caging Him. Almost Every day that My Male is wearing the penis cage I’ll remove it and Edge Him, at Least Once, if not Twice … After taking a few short breaks & giving him time to rest and recover I Will Then Stat Up All Over Again. Usually a Sleepy Long Cuddling Session Every Morning (often not Real Edging but Just Holding & Feeling His Rock Solid Hardness Rhythmically Pulse & Throb in my Hand, Before we get out of Bed) and then something a lot more Intense and Deliberate in the evening (which might be One Edge or Many in a Row!) Stroke - Edge - DENY - Repeat…

I always use our morning uncagings and hugging as an excuse/opportunity for him to shower and take it with him to wash it. He knows if I catch him playing with himself while in the shower the penis cage will stay on for a Month or More, So He Doesn’t Dare Do It. I’ve Trained Him Very Well, I Have to Say.

And oh yeah, Never Let Your Male go Pee in the Morning, Until it’s Time For Him to get up and Shower. You See, If He Has to Pee - He'll Helplessly & Quite Naturally, Grow Extra Rock Hard in Your Hand while Your Cuddling & Holding Him in the Morning.

The Real Art with “Edging” (And It Is Most Definitely an Art); is to Learn Exactly How to get Him as Close as Possible to an Explosion without Actually Allowing Him to Erupt !!! If you pay Close Attention while you Fondle & Play, You’ll Learn Precisely the Clear Warning Signs of an Imminent Ejaculation. There’s Nothing Quite Like “Edging” For Subliminally Building a Guys Libido & Desire. Not Only Will He Cherish You More Thanks to Neurochemistry, But within a Short Timeframe His Vulnerable / Exploitable Mind Will Be Totally Under Your Feminine Control …

Here are some powerful training tips:

Make Him “Always” Tell You - Exactly - How Close He is !!! Kind of obvious, but Insist that he Tells you When to Slow Down & When to Stop. Especially in the Beginning While You’re Learning How To Read His Body Language. Keep talking to Him, Ask Him How it Feels, What is Best. You’ll soon get the FEEL of it {LOL} & He’ll Love You Even More For It…

Feel for his body & muscles tensing - Him holding his Breath, Arching his Back or Even Tensing, All Are Signs he’s getting Very Close. Learn to read & understand the Signs and don’t worry if you go over, you’re Learning! Just Be Sure It’s a Libido Building (Subjugating) “Ruined” Orgasm…

Move from strong to soft strokes, from his vein filled shaft up to His Tip - Constantly - “Change It Up” - Take your Time and Make Sure You Get Him Ultra Rock Hard for Maximum Dopamine production in his Vulnerable Brain. I Personally Like Lots of lube / oil and fast but not too tight of strokes, and then as he gets closer & closer, move to an looser grip and then focus on his Hyper-Sensitive head and frenulem (the strip underneath the head at the top where Guys are most sensitive). Also Take Breaks Frequently - It’s Better to Stop One second too Early Than One Second Too Late !!! Stroke - - Edge - - DENY - - Repeat…

Make it Ultimately HIS Fault if He Erupts. So Again, if he Does Explode, Make Sure You Properly “Ruin it” ; Stop All Rubbing / Stimulation as Soon as he Starts Climax. OR if he’s tied down, you turn it into a post orgasm torture, After the Ruined Orgasm, Where you use his slippery cum as lube to keep rubbing his hypersensitive Joystick - Scolding Him By Saying, ‘You’re so Naughty, I Didn’t Give You Permission To Cum !!!’

When You DO Want to Enjoy His Pent Up Explosions, Make that Part of the Tease Too. When You’re Planning to Make Him Climax & Erupt, This is a great Time to Also Practice your "Edging" Techniques… Use it as an Opportunity to See Just How Crazy You can Make Him, where you’re not worrying about Accidently Taking Him Over the Edge.

Oh and you can add a Wonderfully Sadistic element with this line, ‘If you can hold on for Just five minutes More My Love, I won’t Ruin It when you Do Cum, Okay Baby?’

A Very Effective Mind Fuck & Programming Tool.

#female led relationship

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