#WHILE HE WAS STILL OUT OF PRISON. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

good-beanswrites · 1 month

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An 0309 drabble for an anon ask I got a bit ago :) Thank you for being patient, I really enjoyed writing this!! It's actually a little moment I've wanted to write since I started Milgram fic, but never got around to it. (I mention his injured eye, but don't actually describe anything)

“Stop moving around so much.”

“Don’t tell me what to do.”

“I mean it. You’ll make things worse.”

Mikoto watched as the intensity in Fuuta’s gaze flickered between fire and fear.

He had a doctor’s kit laid out on his lap. Recently, Shidou had his hands full with Mahiru’s treatments and having intense conversations with Haruka, so Mikoto wanted to give him a break. With none of the injuries actually healing as they should, the prisoners were caught in an endless loop of changing bandages and checking for complications.

Shidou was grateful for the help. Many of the others tolerated Fuuta in the same way they spent only the necessary time around Mikoto. They smiled and placated him, acting like he’d gone mad all of the sudden. Whatever was making the others avoid the two of them, it drew the pair together. Mikoto was finding he enjoyed Fuuta’s company. Something about him was rather… charming.

“Me? You’re the asshole that will make things worse. You’re no doctor! Fuck you.”

Eh, maybe he had gone mad.

He took comfort, at least, in the knowledge that Fuuta was growing more comfortable with him. He sure had a special way of showing it, but Mikoto didn’t brag about being a people-person for nothing – he picked up on the way Fuuta sought him out during the day, pretending to be involved in his own activities. The way he struck up a conversation, then acted as if it had been Mikoto’s idea to come over and bother him.

Therefore it was exciting, though not surprising, when Fuuta allowed Mikoto to help treat his injuries. They had only done it a few times, but today brought a whole new challenge.

“I’m not performing surgery or anything. Shidou said it just needs some basic disinfecting.” He flashed his usual grin. “I have a steady hand – I’m a photographer, you know.”

Aside from Shidou, Fuuta hadn’t allowed a single person to look under his eyepatch.

He remained unamused by Mikoto’s smile. For better or worse, he could always tell when it was forced. “It’s not like I have any proof of that. You could be awful at it, for all I know.”

“First chance I get, I’ll request a camera and prove it. Want me to take a picture of you first?”

“If you haven’t already messed up my face…” Fuuta’s focus was glued to the hand carefully reaching towards him.

Mikoto pouted his lips. “Shidou trusted me enough with this. And you must have, because you agreed earlier. So If it’s not about me… You’re not scared, are you?”

There were some things that Fuuta didn’t stop to see through. He sputtered in surprise. “Hell no!” He lifted his chin, finally taking his attention off Mikoto’s hands. He stared defiantly. “I can take it.”

Mikoto felt a bit guilty for resorting to foul play. But not that guilty. “Good. Now hold still...”

He got right to it. One hand held ginger hair out of the way, while the other pinched the corner of the eyepatch. Fuuta’s good eye darted nervously around the room, avoiding the other's close-leaning face. Mikoto peeled it away swiftly, gently

As a horror movie buff, the injury didn’t faze him in the slightest. As someone who’d grown close to Fuuta recently, he felt a wave of anguish at the sight.

Fuuta squirmed. “It’s nasty, isn’t it…”

Mikoto reached down for some supplies. He considered mustering up a smile and saying there was no need to worry so much, but it would have been pointless. Times like these, it was kind of a relief when someone else could see right through him for a change.

“It looks like it hurts.”

“Tch, I don’t need any pity from you.”

“I was going to say, you hide it well. You’re tougher than the warden gives you credit for.”

His cheeks flushed red. “I – I don’t need any flattery from you either!”

“Don’t need anything from anybody, huh?”

Before he could come up with a retort, he hissed through his teeth in pain.

“Ah, sorry.” Mikoto immediately retracted his hand from where it had been dabbing alcohol onto the injury.

Steeling his expression, he muttered, “it’s fine.”

Mikoto tried again. He made sure to move with even more steadiness, his face drawn up in concentration. He saw Fuuta’s features flinch when he touched him, but he stayed still. The two were silent, now, as Mikoto worked. Leaning his face so close made the short task feel much longer. The reddening in his cheeks didn't subside.

He expected Fuuta to snatch the fresh eyepatch away the moment he unwrapped it – he was shocked that Fuuta let him adjust it into place without a word.

“Alright. You’re all set.” He started packing up the kit.

“Listen, don’t tell the others. About my eye.”

Mikoto squinted. He gestured to the right side of his face. “I hate to break it to you, but the big patch kinda gives you away.”

“You idiot! I just mean, don’t tell them what it looks like.” He pulled his hood down over his hair. “I don’t need everyone trying to steal a look at it like I’m some sort of freakshow.”

“Hey, of course.” Mikoto gave him a smile, the kind they both knew was genuine. “I’ve got you.”

Fuuta nodded. He turned his face away, his fingers lingering over where Mikoto’s had just been. “... And… thanks.”

#milgram #fuuta kajiyama #mikoto kayano #0309 #thank you so much for the request woo!!!#lmao it leans more 'serious intimate' than 'sappy romantic' - i hope thats okay #and yeah! i was actually planning to have a chapter in thermoregulation where yuno treated his eye #but every way i envisioned it wouldnt fit right with the tone of the whole thing #so ive been considering other characters and mikoto works So Well -- i was really glad to finally sit and write it out with him!!#its just... having someone as paranoid and ashamed as fuuta actually letting someone close enough to see/touch his most vulnerable injury..#it Gets me man 😭😭😭#and mikoto is also showing a very open side of himself - he has someone who trusts him despite everything thats going on with him/john #someone he doesnt need to preform for -- someone who truly trusts him #;--;#im torn between picturing the prisoners staying away from mikoto t2 or him self isolating while they all still really like hanging out #i went with the first option here but it changes depending on the fic LOL #anyway i hope you enjoyed!!!!#the two start out sitting really far apart and awkward but by the end of t2 with mikoto treating him regularly they start sitting like that #meme where the girl is putting on the others makeup LOL #drabbles #what if i keep procrastinating on school writing and i just write milgram fic forever and ever huh

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crivalsduo · 8 hours

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Will season two!dream realize that csam is a bit toxic?

yes!

especially when sam starts isolating him from his other friends, particularly techno.

dream wants everyone to get along and be friends so that kind of makes him upset. like, he's doing his best to keep everything peaceful, very much early days season one c!dream except now with even more trauma. he does push back against sam when he feels sam is going too far but since sam knows his triggers, he uses that against dream because it makes him more manageable.

and there's going to be a point where techno, as much as he wants dream to be happy and to finally have his peaceful server, can't just sit back and watch dream be abused again. which is basically what's happening, just subtly.

#p.c. answers #season two au #c!dream #c!awesamdude #c!awesamdream #there's also the fact that while he doesn't REMEMBER what happened in the prison #your body remembers trauma y'know? so sam raises his voice a bit and dream's instinct is to 'yes sam' him #he doesn't know WHY but he does. so it makes dream calling these things out a bit harder.#he still does because well. it's DREAM. but.

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shadowedvales · 15 days

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so… in the additional media of stranger things (specifically the comics i’m mentioning), it was initially brenner’s idea/plan to kill off the other test subjects because they weren’t performing as well as eleven was. it was his best solution because that way, all the resources, time, and money could instead be placed only to her. and i just…. sure henry is a fine character and the massacre makes a lot of sense to me, but i think i am once again gonna change up my canon to actually fit this potential narrative instead.

i genuinely think the comic canon of the lab and brenner is far more intriguing than the show. everything with 9/9.5, ricky, and francine. eleven being the only one who grew up completely in the lab. those other kids were either volunteers, well into their teens, or had some semblance of a home life. eleven was the only one practically moulded from the womb. and they all had such a range of interesting powers. i firmly stand with the idea that jane is the only one who can contact the void.

brenner’s entire point of view on the lab subjects changed the second he found out terry was pregnant. he discovered he could steal this baby and make her his own. there would be no convincing the child because it’s all she would have ever known. because of this, i would not put it past a man like brenner to kill the other subjects for the sake of the “greater good” in this case, eleven.

eleven’s gifts just continue thriving beyond his wildest expectations. brenner would never dare assume that having moulded her from the womb, she would still be able to grow into her own person, her own mind, and one day be able to see him for exactly who he was.

back before season four aired, it was obvious there were other test subjects because jane was 011. so there were at least ten kids before her. but i always liked the idea/assumed that she was the last experiment because she was the most successful. that they didn’t need anyone after her because she was fulfilling everything they set out for her to do. with flying colours.

i just think the whole rainbow room idea, pitting the kids against each other thing… been there, done that. boring and predictable. i think at this point my portrayal of her time in hawkins lab really stems from the complete isolation she endured. where having the rainbow room, although eleven was obviously the most isolated out of the kids, brings that sense of community and sister/brotherhood. albeit extremely warped and toxic. knowing that she wasn’t alone in that experience just. doesn’t sit well with me. i think it’s important to note that she was alone, physically and mentally. which is why kali is also so important to her growth. i thought a lot of the flashbacks of her time in the lab during season four was really boring, repetitive, and just very predictable. although peter becoming vecna was a surprise to me, and was a nice little twist, the idea of her having an ally on the inside was really interesting.

maybe they did get as far as they do in canon, peter ballad was telling the truth about everything, about some of the workers there being prisoners like him, and he really wanted to get her out and to safety. but before they can escape through the pipes, they’re caught. peter is shot on the spot, and eleven is put into the isolation room for a few days as punishment. in this timeline, henry would be vecna, but henry would not be peter ballad.

when eleven turned seven, and was already showing extreme promise, where the other children were average at best, brenner had the eight children killed. kali had already escaped. this was the main cause for peter to gain eleven’s trust and try to get her out. because if brenner could murder his “children” in cold blood, there’s no way eleven was safe even in spite of her power.

when eleven is allowed out of the isolation room, her testing becomes more rigorous in attempt to distance and make her forget about what she attempted to do with peter. brenner begins gaslighting her, saying that there was never a peter, that she must have been dreaming. eleven does ask “papa” about “mama”, given peter told her of the day terry broke in the lab, but brenner is convincing enough to make eleven believe it was all in her head. say she is around eight years old, meaning the same timeline of season fours canon flashbacks.

i still do wanna keep the henry creel canon, and keep him as 001. brenner didn’t have him killed alongside the other test subjects, because who knows, one day he could become an even better asset than 011. brenner definitely wants to be able to control henry, but keeps the chip in him because, for the moment, doesn’t know how. killing him would be too big of a loss.

when eleven is ten years old, henry’s concealed powers break free and he manages to get the chip out himself, and unleashes hell onto hawkins lab. he almost kills brenner by snapping his bones, but eleven manages to stop him. her extreme abilities are unleashed, and she sends henry to the upside down. she does fall into a coma due to the extremity of the situation, but she does not forget what happened. brenner believes she’s the perfect weapon as she stepped in to save him without a second thought, was able to defeat henry, and opened a door to something he never thought possible. eleven is rewarded for her efforts. although she remembers the entire battle / confrontation, her memories regarding the portal are very hazy.

brenner decides not to focus on the portal straight away, instead gets her training harder and harder to see what else she can accomplish. also loved the idea of brenner sending her into the void to “look for him” so that will definitely be kept.

by the time she escapes and season one begins, her knowledge of the upside down is basically what we see in canon. because she passed out the moment after she sent henry away, she was once again gaslighted into believing she merely threw him through the glass and killed him. for two years she believed this, until making contact with the demogorgan, and those memories return completely.

due to her saving brenner’s life, (it was pure instinct. she happened to be there. saw her “papa” hurt and knew she had to make him better.) brenner constantly thanks her. but in a very condescending way. tells her: “you saved me so i can continue saving you.” aka, harness your abilities and see what else i can achieve from you. despite the fact that she saved his life, these words and phrases make her feel indebted to him. that she owes him something further.

i don't realistically see her thriving with her speech improvement until she's well into her twenties at least. her slowed development, sensory and social deprivation causes a serious delay in language. surrounded by other children she would have overheard conversations, some would have spoken to her. her conveniently forgetting her upbringing pre the battle with henry just isn't good enough for me anymore. it makes more sense for her to have been raised alone.

it also helps indicate why she gravitated towards the boys when they found her in the woods. they would have been the first people her age she ever remembered seeing. as far as she knew, during the lab there was no one like her. everyone was much older, they were adults-- although she stayed with benny, i'm not sure if she would have stuck around very long. where she followed the boys home without thought.

also it's important to note that after time, jane does understand that peter ballad was a real person, and was truly the first person (aside from terry) who wanted the best for her. when she remembers him, knows that brenner was lying, she deals with immense guilt regarding his death. he was shot right in front of her eyes, because he was trying to help her. this is another catalyst as to why after season two, jane never refers to brenner as papa. she does not give him that sort of credit.

#study‚ in my dreams it's all real and my heart has so much to reveal.#THINKING THOUGHTS. i have had this concept in mind for a while but i THINK i’ve fleshed it out properly now.#will write this up properly one day (never).#although henry offering eleven a place at his side wouldn’t be canon #he would definitely still look at her as an enemy for basically stopping his revenge.#AND the whole speech between he and jane never sat right with me.#saying brenner made him what he was / that it wasnt his fault etc. Like. No? henry was a sociopath. he killed his family.#brenner didn’t do anything to make him who he is. so jane always saw him for exactly what he was #and there’s absolutely no sympathy there.#and then regarding my season four canon as her regaining her powers by remembering the massacre/the fight. i am changing that to her #regaining her powers by simply confronting her past. understanding what she went through. finding ways to cope with it physically and #mentally. getting coping mechanisms from her therapist. seeking help. not needing to know WHY this happened to her (because there is not.#and will never be a reason.) but finding ways to accept it and move on. how to move on from eleven and become janessa ives.#also just because in this case henry doesn’t massacre a bunch of kids? It doesn’t make him any less evil. in this instance i am following #the idea that some of the workers were prisoners there in hawkins lab. and henry killed a bunch of the workers. so would definitely have #killed some innocent people.#just because i am separating peter from henry. does NOT mean i am excusing anything from henry/vecna.#in this case they are two completely different people. although i highkey wanna use jcb as peter because he just did the role SO WELL and #was SO BELIEVABLE i’m not sure about it yet. because i don’t want anyone to get the impression that i’m making excuses for henry.#BUT YES.#this be the new canon. <3 #idc brenner is such a good fuckin villain he’s disgusting but so intriguing.

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llumimoon · 8 months

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literally still thinking abt the liveshow. like that will be burned into my memory but also im SO SAD bc i think bc of technical difficulties this show isn't actually being uploaded to the paetron BUT IT WAS GENUINELY SO FUCKING GOOD. Like the dads as teens interacting with the s2 teens ??????? the dads as babies ???????? GENUINELY? I WISH I COULD BEAM MY MEMORY OF THIS SHOW INTO ALL UR BRAINS i need more ppl to know of its existence so i can scream about it. Also never fucking recovering from emo teenager henry actually

#dndads #cal rambles #like there was genuinely so much #so much stuff that I KNOW the tumblr part of the fandom would absolutely lose their shit over #IM SO SAD THAT IM NOT GONNA SEE THAT HAPPEN #WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY BEINF SO ECTASTIC THAT I GOT TO WITNESS IT #normal stabbed tilt in the heart with an arrow btw she kept trying to call his bluff and he got increasingly more unhinged #I CANT EVEN DESCRIBE EVERYTING THAT HAPPENED ACTUALLY SORRY IM JUSY STILL REALING FROM NORM STILL BEING SO MISERABLE AND UNHINGED #DESPITE THIS BEING PRE-S2 CANON #anyways genuinely if anyone has ANY QUESTIONS AT ALL abt it I WILL ANSWER!!!!!!!!!#rolling on ghe fucking ground i cant cover everything #not over glenn telling taylor he's perfect just the way he is ans to never change #not over henry telling normal to be his best self and GIVING NORMAL THE PG FIRST DRAWING OF TEENIE THEREBY INSPIRING NORMAL TO BE TEENIE #not over Scary instantly having a crush on emo teen Henry #not over Link saying PEACE OUT FUCKERS and leaving them all behind in what is essentially dimensional prison #not over the teenage Henry writing poetry abt Daryl and wanting to ask him out #TBH I HAVENT TALKED MUCH ABT IT BUT THE FIRST HALF WHERE THEY WERE BABIES? THAT WAS FUCKING TOP NOTCH TOO #anyways. i need to calm down and go the fuck to sleep

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go-bonkers-go-foolish · 2 years

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shoutout to naomi misora who met L and then immediately threw him down a flight of stairs with capoeira

#death note #naomi misora #l lawliet #labb murder cases #death note another note #no i will not give context go read the book #it’s hysterical #i straight up laughed out loud in a public space while reading it #also shoutout to beyond birthday (i still do not believe that is a real name someone gave a guy)#who hid under a bed for presumably multiple hours to scuttle out from under it like a little freak #and thought ‘oh this is gonna be a great first impression’#also? he fully knew that whoever L’s new assistant was wouldn’t know what L looked like #so the full L cosplay (including a fuck ton of makeup) was just for funsies #also (last thing)#shoutout to light yagami for reading the name Beyond Birthday in a prison register or some shit #and thinking ‘yeah I’m gonna give this guy the death penalty’

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mistbornthief · 17 days

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AND ANOTHER THING - telling Xunfeng "you're being selfish for not considering your brother's emotions"--homeboy didnt have any!!! not truly til like, three eps prior!!! there's nothing TO consider!!

yeah, if my older brother whom I loved killed my father whom I also loved and didnt show any remorse for it whatsoever for xx thousand years, id be absolutely fucking pissed too and consider a little insurrection from time to time

#truly i dont think xunfeng was in the wrong in that scenario #there's so many things about the way xunfeng's character was treated that irks the hell out of me #but apparently the tag is still somewhat active which i didnt realize so i shall keep my thoughts to myself #like - what makes xunfeng wrong is stuff NO ONE KNEW and they found out while he was locked up in prison so like #love between fairy and devil #the only one in that situation who's in the wrong is the dad. fuck that dude

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orcelito · 3 months

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My druid has "fuckboy" written all over her

#speculation nation #shes a druid but she does Not look it. nor does she act like it really.#druid stuff exists to beef myself up as a front liner (spores druid ftw)#and to act as an excuse like 'whaaaat why r u so suspicious of me im a druid 🥺🥺🥺 i just want what's best for nature 🥺🥺🥺'#meanwhile here i am hogging ALL the worms we manage to find (or. well. most of them.)#bc im going full ham into my powers lol theyre so useful #this is a game of pressing Every button and seeing what happens. yet still going along the lines of good? approximately?#it very much does feel like the kind of thing a druid drow would do. willing to consort with the darkness #but still ultimately striving for peace and order.#i am just perhaps a little bug-brained to accomplish this :3 #ive been playing a Lot of bg3. progressing well through act 2. everything is so very scary and i am just 1 druid 🥺#(i say as if i havent killed literally every single enemy ive come across. im so fucking good at this game.)#the house of healing was by far my least favorite part (so far). that boss battle was TERRIBLE but i managed to get through it.#according to my friends they just talked their way out of it. not me tho. i saw that guy strapped to the table and i was just like #'GET FUCKED BRO' *casts moonbeam* *proceeds to get the shit stabbed outta me*#holy shit he did so much damage. and he was focused ONLY ON ME.......#took me and shadowheart both healing to keep up with the damage he was doing (while astarion and karlach did most of the attacking)#but i did it! hes gone! but holy shit poking around his stuff has been so. eugh.#im in the towers now. so scary. just barely started them tho. gonna look for the prisoners and then proceed from there.#that ketheric dude is fucking terrifying. so big scared about him. but All Men Die The Same 😈#.....well maybe not exactly the same given his 'immortality' thing 😂 but i'll figure it out.#anyways yea check out taltana im going for a mixed feminine and masculine kinda vibes with her. and enjoying it very much.#bg3 spoilers/

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tswwwit · 2 years

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Any more headcanons for that oneshot you made where Bill is Ford's familiar? How does Ford react to Bill getting close to his nephew? How does Bill use this to his advantage? If Dipper can't get a slice of Bill's power, how does his magic shape up in the end?

Sure, why not!

This got longer than I wanted, so it's under a read more. Also, here's the link to the snippet in question.

I think that Dipper and Bill end up hanging out a lot, honestly. Dipper's a lonely guy, and Bill's bored out of his angles, so he's going to be on at least sorta decent behavior, since Dipper's providing more entertainment than he's had in decades. (Ford is unaware of this)

Still very much Bill, though; he absolutely tries multiple tricks in the book to try and get Dipper to break him out, or subtly trick him into getting Ford into a fatal accident. Dipper's been warned, though - I don't think any of them work!

Eventually Dipper gives in and offers a deal: He'll banish Bill back to his realm (He's been trapped in a basement for thirty years, no surprise he wants Ford dead, that sort of thing just straight-up sucks-) as long as Bill doesn't harm him or his family. Bill, once again in a terrible position to bargain, is happy to get the hell out of reality rather than be stuck in a circle for another decade or so.

This.... probably ends up in a pretty big fight between Ford and Dipper. Once he notices Bill is missing. If the Stans weren't already at odds, that'd be the kicker to set it off.

Little does Dipper know, but now that Bill's 'free' - he's gotten his stuff in order, hummed a little tune to himself - and decided it's the perfect opportunity to start courting that cute little mortal in earnest.

#answers #Ford's still bonded to Bill and that'll be true until he dies #But since it likely wasn't an accident in his case he doesn't have Mindscape access #His prisoner has escaped and he's absolutely furious. Does Dipper have *any idea* how much havoc Cipher could cause #Dipper meanwhile has gotten Emotionally Attached at some point and goes off about maybe keeping PRISONERS for thirty years is fucked up #Dipper has a restless night of upset sleep #And wouldn't you know it Bill pops in with some creepy gift (flowers?? A screaming head? In a bouquet of flowers)#What can he say? The kid's real cute. He's been pretty decent company. He betrayed his uncle for Bill!! VERY Sexy of him #And MAN that MIND #He's straightening his tie and spritzing cologne on as he comes up with Date Ideas #Cue: Dipper Not Getting that Bill's 100% after him romantically now #Bill might be stuck with a familiar bond to Ford but since he's not powering THAT guy #Nothing stops him from going 'aw you're cute. Have a little magic why don'tcha' to Dipper #Like a rich man slapping a huge wad of cash in their partner's hand and pinching their butt while they tell 'em to go shopping #Demons *can* give power to mortals - they just don't usually do it without taking something in return during a deal #I enjoy the mental image of Bill taking a page from Hua Cheng's book and going 'oh you need some energy?? Sure!!'#'We gotta lock lips to make the transfer though so pucker up'#Dipper has no reason to question this statement even if he is skeptical #Anyway it probably all works out well in the end! With presumably Bill causing chaos more directly this time #Dipper all not realizing he has a crush until Bill shapeshifts human one time and he goes 'oh no I'm in danger'#I should stop before I get tempted to write this #I have other stuff to do damn it

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sa-bo · 1 year

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Genuinely need a break from this arc real quick why does One Piece delve so deep into the ethics of war this arc, like holy shit I'm gonna fucking die

#so much emotional shit been happening during the marineford arc im gonna come out of this feeling like a jaded war soldier #seeing coby having a downright full-on panic attack while bodies fall to the ground around him?? isnt this kid like 15-17 #and literally any scene where some shit happens to luffy is absolutely mortifying in nature ever since drum island #one piece sets itself up like ''lol look at these pirate friends getting into hijinks and saving each other and conquering the world!''#but then shit gets crazy every time #i can no longer in good conscience recommend this without warning people abt how scary it gets sometimes #i feel like the first taste comes during arlong park where we see nami repeatedly stabbing herself #then with us seeing zoro's wound stapled shut and bleeding like a motherfucker as he still tries to fight #because they couldn't get professional medical help even if they probably saw his fucking guts and ribcage #but shit just keeps getting more terrifying every arc #alabasta? civil war. we see the princess of her country screaming her lungs out in vain for her people to stop fighting #sky island? mass genocide. for funsies. by a man so hopped up on delusions and apathy he thinks it's funny #water 7? we see the downfall of ohara and robin trying to Fucking Commit Suicide because she finally found ppl who like her #thriller bark--THRILLER BARK SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.#seeing brook's crew sing together one last time as they all progressively drop dead one by one until only one is left #and the utter terror as we see zoro standing surrounded by his own blood in a 20 foot radius around him #impel down we see the horrors of the world government and how they treat their prisoners with layers of hell #and marineford we see a war even worse than that which we saw in alabasta #horrible horrible shit

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moeblob · 1 year

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This is really weird but like hello hi I like games that let you make a protag design then let you design someone else to be like. Your follower/ally. And you can make em different heights. I feel the need EVERY TIME to make a tiny protag and a tall secondary character.

I also am so weak for the secondary being non-human, too. Please let me love my weird companions.

#freedom wars #this is outta nowhere supposedly but like lmao i tried a different game and i was just reminded of fw #and im like dang i really liked my sinner who got the title accessory-obsessive and never changed it #weird fact of while i prefer to be called salmon myself very much so??#i named my sinner in fw something different then named my accessory salmon #he was the love of my life #i still love him tbh #he hates me for spending my life running around not fighting abductors bc im too busy gathering #its true i drew a comic for it ages ago #im a useless wittle fella #my wonderful prison warden beloved salmon hello i love you all these years later #its like in dd:da where you have the arisen and pawn #there is something deep in me that has a profound love for my pawn my beloved weird humanoid pal #listen i just like having tiny trouble makers and tall rule abiders who are very done with my antics #bc tbh i suck at games i am so bad at playing games if my life depended on being good at games i would die #theres also a secret third game that i am very much not mentioning out of shame that i started last night where you can do this #and my only complaint is i made the mc a guy and the other guy a guy and i feel so sad #that the height gap isnt as big as it was in fw and ddda #im not gremlin enough in the secret third game

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good-beanswrites · 9 months

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hiihiii i love the way u write shidou smmmm so if ur requests r still open id like something with shidou + lies <3

Hellooo thank you!! Shidou zoomed his way into my favorites and I really enjoy writing him, haha! Here's a bit of him hanging with the smoking group T1

The problem with lying, Shidou had found, is that you end up fooling everyone involved. If you spend time trying to deceive someone, the people close to you will also believe it. If you continue, it will affect all those in proximity. And, if you do it for long enough, you’ll start to deceive yourself.

Shidou had certainly lost track of his lies for a while. Right before it had all come crashing down around him, he’d almost believed all the beautiful tales of hope and health he’d been spreading. He’d almost seen the world as the place he’d been describing.

And then the truth hit him; it crushed him. Seeing all the blood on his hands, he’d tried to swear the whole thing off in what little time he had left in this life. But, like his other habits, it was a difficult one to break.

He exhaled smoke into the room, listening to Mikoto go on about the busy days of his office job. Shidou was concerned how he still spoke about everything as if he’d be heading right back after all this.

He wanted nothing more than to sit him down for an examination. There were several reasons he may not remember his crime -- it was most likely the emotional shock, but Shidou couldn’t rule out the possibility of a head injury, an illness, a seizure, a stroke, or even it being a side effect of whatever drugs Milgram must have given the prisoners when bringing them here. It took everything in him to let Mikoto be. After all, no one was going to request help from a “killer doctor,” and he didn’t have any of his usual equipment.

So he just stood and smoked in silence.

“What about you?” Kazui asked. “My line of work definitely stressed me out, too. But I don’t think I’ve seen you bat an eye at anything since coming here.” He nudged Shidou. “Are you just as cool under pressure as those movie doctors?”

Shidou’s lips angled to a smile. “I suppose so. Though, I believe they look calm because they’re meant to appear perfectly competent. I’m calm so that patients don’t realize I am imperfect.”

Was that all he was, when he killed those people? Just ‘imperfect’?

Seeing the way Mikoto’s eyebrows shot up, he clarified, “I’m very competent, mind you. But no doctor is perfect. Many patients will panic if you show even the slightest sign of doubt.”

He teased, “so you just lie to everyone all day? Damn, remind me to watch out the next time I go in for a checkup.”

“No, it isn’t like that.” Wasn’t it?

The other two continued the conversation, but Shidou grew quiet. Was that something else he’d started to believe? Another thing he’d convinced himself was normal when, in fact, it was very, very wrong?

“I get that. Confidence is really important when dealing with dangerous situations.”

“Heh, I’ve definitely put up a bit of an act around here for some of the younger prisoners. I think it’s been helping, they seem calmer from when this all started.”

That’s right -- his goal was always to help, to calm. He watched Mikoto rub his temple absently, and knew another headache was approaching and knew what to do for it. He’d helped Haruka get over a cold the past week. He and Kotoko had discussed nutrition tips the other day. He was still doing good. The smile that he put up for the others was still doing good.

“Well, I’m glad we’ve got a professional around here.” Kazui gestured his cigarette to Shidou, snapping him away from his thoughts. “Nothing against the guard, but it’s nice to have someone like you who can help me look out for everyone.”

“Yeah, feel better about being here already!” Mikoto slung an arm around him. The boy's expression showed he was trying to appear in on some joke. “So, doc, you think that all of us are getting out of this crazy place in one piece?”

Shidou wanted to warn him the situation was more serious than he knew. Milgram was not a big joke. He was not a man to be trusted. He was not a man to be forgiven.

But old habits die hard.

“Oh, I'm sure of it.”

#milgram #shidou kirisaki #mikoto kayano #thank you for the request ahh!! i tried to peek into his mind a bit more -- hes got a lot going on in there ough...#its neat that he and kazui are such different flavors of liars #kazui is hiding himself out of fear - always painfully aware of the truth #but shidou lies to make others happy and help more people and to save more lives - all the while believing it a bit himself #many of the other prisoners reached the end of their patience with their lies/what they were hiding. they finally broke.#but shidous final murder happened because he was completely consumed by his own lie #and now - despite having suicide-level guilt over it - hes still helping people and needing to put up those old masks #hes just so !!!! *shakes him violently*#on another note he strikes me as the type to be constantly noticing things and itching to help #everyones kinda sure that mikotos trauma is repressing his memory but shidou is the only one who it Really bothers #anyway i hope you enjoy!#drabbles

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