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rebelwriter99 · 1 year

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Yep. You guessed it. Crosshair appeared in an episode and I am a sobbing mess.

Before we get to the soul destroying trauma of crosshairs beautifully executed character arc, the rest of the episode!

Echo is practically a patron saint of imprisoned clones at this point. Did not stop cheering him on every second he was around. And he rescued Howzer! (Why do I feel like this a consolation prize?). What I love so much watching this sequence for the second time-I went straight back to the beginning again-is how obvious it is that they’ve done this before. The clones all act like this is their average Tuesday and the imperials are almost helpless. I think it’s been made clear over and over again that the empire underestimate the clones consistently-and I’m not looking forward to them inevitably realising their mistake.

I then spend several minutes dying laughing when Tech gets to experience his own driving. I don’t think he’s ever been more visibly or audibly terrified before. They are all big brothers and it’s fantastic. Hunters conundrum is getting interesting though-I’m starting to think his decisions are going to be in focus next. Everyone else has had their development and made their choices so far, but I think just as he’s tentatively come to terms with Pabu and peace, he’s going to get dragged back into trouble trying to protect his squad.

And Crosshair. Oh Cross. This entire episode confirms so much to me about who he actually is as a character. The “Drs” are either very clever and deliberately manipulated him into sending a distress signal, somewhat unlikely since they shut it off, or incredibly stupid. Revealing that they want Omega, who is honestly going back to the empire over the bad batch’s dead bodies, was a fatal mistake. He knows threatening omegas safety is ultimately a threat to kill his brothers. He will do anything to stop that from happening. Everything it cost him just to warn them-and I’m honestly not sure we’ve ever seen him miss before He wasn’t fighting because he could-he had to. In that situation there was nothing else he was capable of doing, other than risking everything to save them. And if he says ‘wrong’ again I’m going to start crying as a Pavlovian response.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, someone please wrap him in a blanket and give him back to his brothers. I cannot wait for the finale episodes next week. Really hoping this isn’t a season 2 of rebels situation. I need them all to be back together again. Safe somewhere. Please.

#star wars #the bad batch #clone force 99 #tbb spoilers #the bad batch spoilers #crosshair #force damn it dave filoni you are not good for my sanity!#given his track record with emotionally devastating writing I’m hoping we’ve had our fill this season #nothing has really ended well so far #we’ve had no ‘big wins’#so I’m ‘cross’ing my fingers that we are allowed one now #I’ve never needed a happy ending for characters quite so badly #please just this once can Star Wars skip the bittersweet and go straight to family hugs thank you

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canonicallyobserving911 · 1 month

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“I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Fanonwriter2023 on AO3

Where CANON and FANON collide!

Season 7 FANON Speculation: Buddie Multi-Chapter Fanfic - Hiatus Reading: “I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Chapter 26 is now available on AO3.

Please note: Chapters 24 and 25 were posted at the same time.

This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

“I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Currently 26 chapters completed: 1M Words; Rated: Mature

One chapter will be posted at a time.

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Here's a snippet from Chapter 26 of an emotionally distraught and hysterical Eddie while he's on the phone with 9-1-1.

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“9-1-1, what’s your emergency?”

“Yes I’m at 4995 S. Bedford St. and I have an adult male, 31 years of age who's unconscious and unresponsive and I need medical response.”

“Ok sir, can I get your name?”

“Eddie Diaz! I’m a firefighter and a paramedic with the 118.”

“Eddie!” Linda asks.

“Yes! Linda, I’m so glad it’s you.” He heaves past the sob lodged in the back of his throat that feels like a ping pong ball and continues. “Listen, it’s Buck… SHIT!” He stops talking because he remembers he needs to follow protocol for her recording then he tries again. “I mean you need his first and last name for the call. It’s my husband Evan Diaz and he’s also a firefighter with the—the 118.”

“Ok Eddie, I’m checking to see which RA unit is closest to that address but can you tell me what happened?”

“I—I don’t know but I came into the living room; he was swaying back and forth and I caught him before he—he hit the floor. I manually checked his vitals by doing the ABC method… I opened his airway, checked his breathing along with his circulation, then I—I got my medical bag and checked his pupillary response which is fine but his pulse, his blood pressure and his heart rate... and all of them are still low which is why I believe he might be having a bradycardia event. Linda… oh my god, whatever is happening to him is more serious than syncope because he’s still unresponsive.”

“Can you tell me how long he’s been down?”

“It’s been more than two minutes but I didn’t start counting until after I caught him so I could be one or two seconds off.”

“Ok, Eddie, our closest unit is 6 minutes away.”

He frowns and loudly asks, “Six minutes? Why?! I’m sorry please—please forgive me for being loud but I... I—I’m asking because there’s a fire station less than 4 minutes away from here.” He feels like he’s about to crawl out of his skin because the proximity of their home to the closest fire station in this area is one of the reasons why he decided to purchase it. He wanted to be close to one for Chris just in case they ever have to call emergency services.

Will the RA unit arrive in time to save Buck or will Eddie lose the love of his life? 👀

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This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

Fic Summary: Months after Buck and Eddie were hit by the same lightning strike; they’re still struggling with the aftermath of it. But before they make their love confessions, they’ll spend time getting to know themselves as individuals first. Eddie learns to enjoy the simple things in life as he participates in activities on his own and with new friends while Buck learns the rest of the 31-year-old deep dark family secret about his conception and birth. Their journey to forever is still a work in progress but once they finally admit they’re in love with each other, everything that follows their love confessions will be cataclysmic.

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Chapter Summaries

Chapter 1 - Eddie makes a new friend while Buck receives devastating news regarding the sperm donation he made for Connor and Kameron.

Chapter 2 - Buck does a lot of research to learn more about the abnormalities found in his red blood cells and Eddie starts a new therapy journey that’s all about him and not the traumas he’s experienced.

Chapter 3 - After more than a month, Buck and Eddie finally spend time together outside of work but it doesn’t end well and they part with a lot of uncertainty regarding their places in each other’s lives.

Chapter 4 - Eddie has a few realizations about his life which causes him to consider moving back to El Paso, TX while Buck continues to be reminded of his past which causes him to take an impromptu road trip across America.

Chapter 5 - Both Buck and Eddie have difficult conversations with their parents and Buck finally learns the truth behind the reason why his mother despised him while Eddie finally tells his mother about the way she tries to control him.

Chapter 6 - More than two weeks after Buck pushed Eddie away after suggesting they needed a break; Eddie decides to try again. Eddie’s there for Buck when he’s at his worst just like Buck was there for him when he was at his worst and he won’t let Buck give up.

Chapter 7 - After Buck’s mental breakdown, Eddie has his back the same way Buck had his when he had his own breakdown more than a year ago. They share several vulnerable and emotionally intimate moments with one another and they begin to realize their small, sweet and caring gestures matter just as much if not more than any grand gesture ever could because these are the foundations of a long-lasting love relationship.

Chapter 8 - Buck, Eddie and Chris all have their own therapists and during their sessions, they reflect on their pasts while they’re in the present so they can prepare for their future together as a family.

Chapter 9 - Buck and Eddie are there for each other when Buck has to testify as a witness during the trial. But by the end of it, they’ll both realize their individual and shared traumas are going to keep resurfacing until they talk about them, deal with the fact that they’re in love with one another and face the fact that they can’t live without each other.

Chapter 10 - As Buck and Eddie finally begin to confront their past traumas, they realize how much they need each other to fill in the gaps of their memories. Additionally, the universe screams at them for what appears to be the one hundredth time so Buck can realize he doesn’t have to ‘find it’ because he already ‘made it’ and Eddie’s reminded tomorrow isn’t promised and he doesn’t have to die alone if he doesn’t want to.

Chapter 11 - A “virga” or dry thunderstorm is in the forecast but once the rain starts, the thunderstorm happening outside won’t be able to match the storm brewing inside between Buck and Eddie. It’s the universe’s final scream and when the tumultuous winds begin to blow, they’ll have one last chance to hold onto everything they’ve built over the last six years or they’ll lose it all forever.

Chapter 12 - Buck and Eddie have always shared a deep physical attraction and an emotional intimacy that’s unmatched but now that they’re in a relationship, they’re learning how to navigate the romantic intimacy they’ve been waiting for six years to explore. The love they have for each other is a once in a lifetime, soulmate, love of their lives type of love that transcends space and time.

Chapter 13 - While navigating the newness of their romantic relationship, Buck and Eddie take advantage of every moment they spend together. As their individual lives, people from their pasts, time constraints and the possibility of losing each other again make attempts to interrupt and interfere with their journey to forever, they love, care for, support and hold onto each other even tighter to withstand it all.

Chapter 14 - Buck and Eddie can see the lights at the end of the tunnels regarding the results of Buck’s Cancer Screening along with everything else they’re dealing with. But are the lights they see exits to the tunnels or are they headlights on different runaway trains that are speeding towards them in an effort to interrupt their forever?

Chapter 15 - Buck and Eddie have known they were exactly who the other one wanted in a partner since they met six years ago when they agreed to have each other’s backs. They’re in a romantic relationship, they’re both preparing to ask the other one to spend forever with them and by the end of the seventh week into their relationship, together they will plan their most important and greatest adventure for their future.

Chapter 16 - As Buck and Eddie begin to prepare for their marriage ceremony that will take place in Rome, Italy in December 2023, they start planning their first international adventure as a romantic couple. Even though Chris is still the only person they’ve told about their relationship, several people who know them have already witnessed the love they share and as the days continue, others will witness it too.

Chapter 17 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to departing Los Angeles for their international adventure, a moment in time will remind them; life is fragile, tomorrow isn’t promised and every second of everyday should be cherished because everything can change in an instant. The result of that realization will cause them to hold onto each other even more.

Chapter 18 - As Buck, Eddie and Chris prepare for family gatherings before and during the Thanksgiving holiday, the “Santa Ana Winds” start to blow and all sorts of expected and unexpected familial drama ensues.

Chapter 19 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to their wedding day, the universe begins to align everything so that some of their parent and children's relationships are strengthened while others come to an abrupt end.

Chapter 20 - With only 14 days remaining until Buck, Eddie and Chris depart Los Angeles, CA traveling to Rome, Italy, for their first family adventure, an early morning conversation about “tying up loose ends” helps Buck and Eddie realize there are still several things left unfinished on their ‘To Do’ lists. The question is will there be enough time to complete all of them?

Chapter 21 - Buck, Eddie and Chris are finalizing their ‘To Do’ Lists, double checking their itineraries and packing their suitcases in preparation for their trip to Europe so they can board their flight that departs Los Angeles, CA on Friday, December 15, 2023 at 3:25PM.

Chapter 22 - While Buck, Eddie and Chris spend the first 8 days of their European family adventure in Italy, their primary reason for going will be fulfilled as well as several others they hadn’t considered or anticipated.

Chapter 23 - As the Diaz Family continues their Italian family adventure, they’ll say, “Ciao” or hello and goodbye to a lot of things almost immediately after they become an official and legal family.

Chapter 24 - After Buck, Eddie and Chris arrive in London, England on December 24th; the Diazes immediately start preparing to spend their first family Christmas together. During their stay, each of them will hear a few choice words that will be the life raft to get them home to complete their searches to be seen and to be found.

Chapter 25 - After spending more than two weeks in Europe, Eddie, Buck and Chris are back in Los Angeles and they’re getting ready to attend Maddie and Chimney’s New Year’s Eve party. During the event, they have plans to make two surprise announcements but the question is, who’s really going to be surprised, the Diaz family or their found family at the 118?

Chapter 26 - Buck and Eddie are once again faced with their greatest fear of losing each other but this time it could be permanent and if it is, then they won’t be able to spend the rest of their lives together.

Chapter 27 - Will be posted soon.

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Read chapters 1-26 are available on AO3.

Continue reading on AO3

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #christopher diaz #the buckley diaz family #buckley diaz family #The Diaz Family #911 on abc #911 abc #911 fanfic #buddie fanfic #ao3 fanfic #buddie wip #“I'm still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”#Fanonwriter2023 on AO3 #Chapter 26 is available on AO3

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iwanthermidnightz · 6 months

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Just a few excerpts below, but please read the full article, it’s really good!

In their live shows and on The Record, the group take turns singing lead vocals, meaning they regularly get to stand a couple of feet away from the spotlight – which I sense is a more natural position for each of them. “[Touring is] way more fun together, and easy together,” says Dacus, addressing her bandmates. “It’s cute watching y’all have your little bit during ‘Cool About It’, and when you look at each other in ‘Anti-Curse’, I have no choice but to stan.” As a band, they share the weight of responsibility that they usually have to shoulder alone.

The crowds are so deeply engaged, not just because of the emotionally devastating content of the songs, but because of what Boygenius represents. They are a queer-identifying, all-female rock group in 2023, triumphantly landing themselves in spaces that used to be dominated entirely by straight men, such as their Rolling Stone cover earlier this year, in which they playfully replicated a classic 1994 photoshoot of Nirvana in business suits. And it’s not just that: they are rock stars in a very traditional sense – as their bombastic, thrashy live show, replete with stage diving et al, goes to show – who also sing songs every night about how much they love and appreciate one another. “We talk to each other about our feelings and process emotions as adults,” Baker says. “Instead of screaming at each other and throwing handles of vodka backstage.”

The band’s willingness to step up and wade into political issues has further solidified the bond they’ve formed with their fans. Earlier this summer, they performed in drag in Tennessee to protest against the state’s anti-LGBTQ+ and anti-drag laws. In May last year, when it was leaked that Roe v Wade would be overturned by the US Supreme Court, Bridgers shared on Twitter that she had undergone an abortion the previous year, alongside a link to a donation page. Young, vulnerable people are seeing their favourite rock band stand up for them – it’s powerful, and the love and appreciation the fans feel for that is clear during the live shows. At concerts throughout the year so far, there have been reports of people throwing things at artists – phones, wheels of brie, their dead mother’s ashes – but at Boygenius gigs, fans throw pink carnations, in reference to a line that Dacus sings in “We’re in Love” (“I’ll be the boy with the pink carnation pinned to my lapel”). “We’ve given a lot of who we are as people in our art, through interviews and social media,” Dacus says. “I think that’s maybe the silver lining of the parasocial relationship; they might want to treat us the way they treat their friends, instead of a mysterious, untouchable, unfazeable, unhurtable thing.”

Boygenius know that they’re speaking to – and at times, for – an underrepresented group, and it’s a point of great pride, a driving force in their work. “Being into our band is a dog whistle for the kind of kid that has similar interests,” says Baker.

“Like a sensitive gay baby,” adds Dacus.

“That is what makes [the job] meaningful to me,” says Baker. “To be away from my family when they need me to be there, to be doing things that I find inane or self-serving. I’m like, ‘Dang, look at all those kids’. Like, actually, there’s 25,000 little gay kids out there who’ve heard us talk about things like: be inside of your life. Pay attention to your friends. It’s worth it to live.”

The group have become the role models they wished they had themselves when they were growing up. “I think that if I had more queer and trans idols when I was younger, it would have felt more normal to me to engage with those things,” Dacus says. “And it’s gotten to the point of silliness, all of our stage antics and kissing at most of the shows, but I wish I had seen playful, joyful depictions of queerness.”

#boygenius #phoebe bridgers #lucy dacus #julien baker

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le-trash-prince · 8 months

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OF Episode 6 Thoughts: BostonNick (& BostonRay)

There was so much good content this episode I feel WELL FED

The double irony of Boston “I can’t be friends with someone who records me.” Like obviously Nick’s expression is pretty telling as to the obvious parallel but also BOSTON

REALLY, BOSTON? YOU THINK IT’S DISGUSTING TO BE RECORDED. TELL ME MORE ABOUT THAT.

Loved the whiplash Nick was going through between meeting Boston’s dad, getting complimented, then having to deal with Boston not being able to talk about their relationship, and finding out Boston is considering leaving the country. “Like am I special or am I disposable?”

Still praying for “Nick locks Boston in the basement” bad end, but this could feasibly make Nick consider moving on from Boston. But I hope he tries to lock Boston up.

But DAMN BOSTON IS SO WHIPPED FOR NICK like “please stay with me, be my number one until I figure this out, I don’t need an emotional relationship but I’m lying to myself” at the mere suggestion of Nick being unhappy with him. This from the man who just earlier said to Drake “if I wanted to talk to you, I would have messaged you.”

Theyre just so obsessed with each other I love it

Nick pinning Boston to the deck did a lot of things for me thanks 👍👍

I LOVED the confrontation with Ray and Boston. I loved the absolutely devastated look on Boston’s face “Who told you?” it was so delicious hurt my man some more it’s good for my mental health

My friend and I kept yelling “JUST FUCK EACH OTHER ALREADY”

On that note, when Ray asked Nick “did he fuck you in his dark room?!”—ahdjfjdj Ray did he fuck YOU IN THE DARK ROOM??!! YOU CANT JUST SAY THAT AND NOT GIVE ME DETAILS!!

I swear every time Boston looks at Ray it’s so fucking LOADED.

I love Boston’s refusal to ever admit to wrongdoing. You keep doing you, my toxic little man.

Regarding Boston pulling away from Nick at the end of the ep—I’m pretty sure this is the first time we have ever seen Boston physically pull away from Nick. Does he suspect it was Nick who leaked the info? I feel like he doesn’t have reason at this moment to suspect Nick tho.

Or is he feeling sensitive about how many comments he got that day about him and Nick being boyfriends? Is he afraid that it’s obvious to everyone how he feels about Nick? Boston you emotionally constipated little man. You are allowed to have a positive emotion for another human being.

It is quite interesting to see Boston reeling from other people blowing shit up for once, rather than him being the instigator. Emotional consequences for my man?? I feel like Ray’s comments mirrored some of Boston’s remarks from ep 5, but at least Ray had the decency to not publicly reveal that Boston had been recorded too.

I hope things continue to go downhill for Boston. I love him and I want him to suffer and be sad and things.

(TopMew post here)

#only friends #em post #only friends the series #bostonnick #bostonray

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petpluto · 1 year

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Thinking more about the Tento di Cruciamentum and how it’s a test for Watchers and Slayers, and I do believe it is developed for slayers to fail - for the Council to get rid of a slayer that will become harder to control as she reaches maturity. But a thought occurred to me that it could also potentially be a way of culling Watchers who have stepped out of the accepted dogma.

Giles says in Fool for Love that the journal entries regarding slayers’ deaths are, in general, painful to record for their Watchers, which means he’s not the first to become emotionally entangled with his slayer. That entanglement is almost inevitable. Who would be the people who would or could speak against The Watcher’s Council’s creed of using slayers as an war inexhaustible resource? It would be the watchers in the field. Giles is isolated from The Council in so many ways that don’t make sense if The Council wasn’t concerned about the reach and the pull of their field watchers. To be the Watcher to an active Slayer seems to be a privilege - Wesley is happy to be sent to Sunnydale, Giles is practically giddy in Welcome to the Hellmouth. But it’s a double edged sword. Now, the Council is worried about the outside influences, about emotional ties, about what these watchers witness. How they see the slayer, how she becomes a person to them. A person they care for. A person, in Giles’ case, he would go to incredible lengths to protect. Giles says it himself - “If any one of the Council still had any contact with a Slayer, they would see”. But what Giles doesn’t see - can’t see, because he still has faith in the institution - is that is in itself a primary feature and not the bug he assumes it to be.

And so the Cruciamentum is to make sure the Watcher responsible for the Slayer is still adhering to the worldview that she isn’t a person. That she is solely a weapon. To be used and discarded as needs fit. And the Council goes one farther toward breaking these Watchers who do see their slayer as more than a weapon. “If this girl is everything you say, then you’ve nothing to worry about”. Just like a belief in miracles, if your slayer doesn’t make it, it’s on you. You didn’t believe hard enough, train her well enough, prepare her enough. You devoted your time and energy to a girl who wasn’t enough. Devastating to the Watcher who doesn’t warn his Slayer; who Believes and loses her anyway. Devastating and demoralizing for the Watcher; and proof that this slayer wasn’t worthy, so her watcher shouldn’t be listened to for the rest of the Council. Because what happens to watchers who lose their slayers? I imagine they can be invited back into the fold, if they pass the actual test; or they can be let go, to mourn the loss of the girl they had dedicated some part of their lives to. And the Council needs so many of them to not gain access to those halls again, to not exert influence over the rank and file. To not express the heterodoxy that the Slayer is the one fighting the war. To not convince other Watchers that the slayer is a person who needs protecting. That she should be treated as a person, and given the tools to succeed in this world for as long as she can stay alive.

The Watcher’s Council loathes the idea of an uncontrollable slayer, but it is frightened to death of that slayer’s Watcher. And the Cruciamentum solves both of those problems, 9 times out of 10, with brutal efficacy.

#buffy the vampire slayer #the watcher’s council #buffy summers #rupert giles

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copperbadge · 1 year

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I hope these questions aren’t offensive, you can just delete this ask if they are… Did it help you, mentally speaking, to be officially diagnosed as ADHD? Like, is it easier to know for a fact you’re neurodivergent and not just,,, weird? I’m pretty sure I’m autistic, and only undiagnosed because I’m a girl and I test well (my brother is autistic and has the same tendencies and reactions I do, but he got dx’d at 5), but on the other hand, what if I’m wrong? And I’m also a broke college student, so I’m kinda waffling on whether or not to actually pursue a doctor’s opinion, but I thought I’d ask your advice first, since you’re both a complete stranger and have gone through something similar

Anon, you sent this in SEPTEMBER, my apologies, it got pushed down a bit in my askbox.

The thing is...okay I'll talk about the psychological impact in a minute, but I also feel like it's the least relevant aspect, for me. Whatever a diagnosis did for my sense of self, what it also did was give me a document that impacts everything else in my life.

With a diagnosis I have access to medication that materially improves my condition (which is less the case with autism than with ADHD, admittedly). I have access, should I want it, to accommodations for my disability; those are imperfectly applied, you often have to fight hard to actually get them implemented, but especially as a student you would be given access to things like longer time periods for tests, study aids like audio recordings of your required reading, extra tutoring, pre-registration access to classes, etc. based on need.

This bleeds over into the mental health aspect a little, but I am also more confident in my research on ADHD because I have a medical doctor's opinion that yes I do indeed have it (and evidence of that from the efficacy of the medication).

In terms of whether it helped me mentally/emotionally...research is ongoing, I suppose. It didn't emotionally devastate me the way it did my mother, when she was diagnosed late with learning disabilities, but she came from a different generation and didn't grow up with a sibling who was diagnosed young, so she had different issues than I do. There is some bitterness about my late diagnosis, but that's situational, and I'm old enough to know how to work through/past it. I suppose it gives me more confidence in asking for informal accommodations -- recently at a party I asked someone if we could move rooms because I couldn't process what they were saying over the two conversations happening behind me -- but I was already pretty good at that. I'm having to re-examine some basic beliefs I held about who I am, but that's not a bad thing, just unpleasant to be in the middle of.

So now to the heart of it: "What if I'm wrong?"

First, almost nobody who self-diagnoses is whole-cloth wrong when it comes to neurodivergence. They might have the wrong diagnosis, or might not fully understand what's going on, but when that "Oh, I'm different" light flicks on, it's usually for a reason.

Second, okay, what if you are wrong? It's okay if you're just weird. You won't be punished for being Neurotypical-But-Weird any more than society was already punishing you, so you risk nothing in getting tested in that sense. You don't lose any ground, and you gain some self-knowledge. Might not be the self-knowledge you wanted, but it's not going to kill you.

True, there is the cost to consider, but as a student you should be able to go to the campus health center and at least get more advice on how testing would work, the costs etc. Your school's disability office, if they have one, may also have resources in that regard. It IS important to get adequately tested -- a lot of people miss a diagnosis because their evaluator's idea of testing was "asking combative questions and dismissing the answers" -- but more knowledge is always better than less.

The only downside to testing is that if you do get an official diagnosis, that can follow you for life -- earlier discussions I've had about this have brought up the fact that it can impact job placement, whether you're allowed to adopt or care for children, and other issues surrounding the way we punish people with disabilities for being disabled. A diagnosis of Autism can impact you legally. But I also think it's worth it to know and to have documentation that says you need accommodation.

I mean. This hasn't been the most fun process in the world, but I do think it's been one of the most important things I've done in my life. If you felt strongly about your self-diagnosis I'd say don't bother with the official, just live your life as if you had one, but it sounds like you have a lot of self-doubt -- so I'd work, as and how you're able, to lay that doubt to rest one way or another.

#sam has adhd

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hollywoodxwhore · 10 months

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Ours | Chapter 14

Colson x Presley (Original Female Character)

Synopsis: Presley and Colson fell in love accidentally, but they were meant to be. Now that all the obstacles have been removed, they're moving in together in LA. Now, they have all the time in the world for Colson to teach Presley all of the things he knows. This fic is the sequel to Mine, which can be found in my masterlist!

Warnings/Content: angst is sticking around for a bit. big emotions, Presley finding out about Col, swearing, mentions of suicide attempts

This chapter is a little less intense, but it's still heavy. Please take care of yourself and skip if you need to.

Presley

I’m not ready to go home yet. I’m on a high after confronting Megan and getting my proof, but I’m still a little mad at Colson. I need to grab a coffee, maybe, and think about what I’m going to do.

Jason will never agree to play the audio recording for anyone, so I’m going to have to publish it somehow without permission. I’ve gained a lot of followers since being with Colson, so I know people are bound to see it and probably save it, screen record it or something. It will clear Colson’s name and make Megan look like a total idiot.

I drive to Starbucks and grab a venti coffee, then climb into my car and lock the doors. I pull up my phone and trim the audio recording. My mind is racing and so is my heart. I should let Colson know before I do this, but he wasn’t in his right mind yesterday and I doubt he’s any better today. He’ll probably tell me there’s no point.

I decide to take a little bit more time to myself. I slept like shit last night, and despite this coffee, I know I’ll be able to nap. I take myself back to Cash and Liv’s place. When I get inside, Cash is on the couch playing video games. He glances over at me. “Hey. You okay?”

I nod. “I just need a nap.”

Cash eyes the coffee in my hand. “Good luck with that.”

I shrug half-heartedly. “Thanks again for letting me stay.”

“Of course,” Cash says, pausing his game. He taps his fingers on his thigh. “Hey, Pres?”

“Hm?”

“Have you talked to Colson since you…left?” he asks.

I shake my head. “No,” I say weakly. “I know I need to, I just…” I push a hand through my hair. Colson hurt me so badly by talking to me that way. I’m not ready to talk to him yet. What if he’s in the same headspace? What if he says more horrible things to me? Emotionally, I can’t handle it right now.

“Would you mind if…” Cash pauses, chewing his lip. “Would you mind if I went and checked on him? I know you need space and I 100% support that, but I think maybe Colson needs a friend.”

I consider this and my eyes well up with tears. No matter what, I’m so unbelievably sad for Colson. I need to let him know what happened with Megan but I just can’t do it right now. I don’t even know what I’m going to do with the audio.

“Yes. Please do that,” I say. “Thank you, Cash.”

He smiles softly. “Go get some sleep. Love you.”

“Love you, too,” I say, then go to the guest room and pass the fuck out.

I wake up when the sky is dark. Shit, guess I really needed that nap. I stretch out and reach for my phone. I really need to take it off do not disturb. It’s been that way since I left home almost a full day ago, and at the very least, I need to let Colson know that I’m okay, that we’re okay. We can make it through a fight. I’m confident in that. This is going to fix everything and we can go back to normal. When I get home later, I can explain everything in person and we can decide what to do together.

I sigh as I turn off do not disturb, finally feeling ready to message Colson. As expected, there are tons of texts and missed calls from him. Even a voicemail. I listen to that first and frown at his voice. He sounds so devastated and guilt stabs me like a knife. But at the same time, he was out of line and I needed space. Cash went over to check on him, but I’m so torn on how to feel.

I call Colson back but it goes straight to voicemail. I frown and try twice more, but he doesn’t answer. I scroll to our texts, finding a ton of messages pleading for me to come back. Lots of apologies. I text him back but my iMessage won’t go through. I send it as a text message, but worry causes my heart to race. Why is his phone off? Why isn’t he answering? Does he just need space from me or is something else going on?

Just then, a soft knock sounds on my door. I sit up in bed and call out for the person to come in. Cash appears in the doorway and immediately, I can tell something is wrong. I turn on the lamp and scrutinize him. He looks exhausted and terrified and traumatized. “Cash?” I ask worriedly. “Come here.”

He walks over and sits on the edge of the bed, pushing a hand slowly through his hair. His hand trembles as it returns to his lap. “What is going on?” I ask anxiously.

Cash’s lip trembles but he takes a deep breath. “I need you to just listen,” he says, “and not panic because everything is okay now.”

“Cash, what the fuck is going on?” I ask, and my voice is whiny with fear.

“Colson is staying overnight at the hospital. He’s safe,” Cash says. Instantly, my blood runs cold and my hands start to shake. The hospital?

“Wh-what?” I whimper.

“Just let me get this out. Okay?” he asks, glancing at me before quickly looking away. “When I got over there, he kind of lost it. Broke down. Before I got there…” He pauses, swallowing hard. “If I hadn’t gotten there when I did, he was going to…he was going to take a bottle of pills.”

I blink, stiffening. “Wait.” I try to swallow but my mouth is dry. I scramble out from under the blankets and get up, pacing on shaky legs. “No. No no no,” I whimper, eyes filling with tears. “Oh god, Colson.”

“Presley,” Cash says firmly. I snap my head over so I can look at him. “Let me get this out.” His voice is firm and it shuts me up. I nod.

“He didn’t take anything,” Cash continues. “I took him to the ER because I was worried. But he instantly regretted his actions. He scared the shit out of himself, Pres.”

I can’t stop shaking and I’m on the verge of a panic attack. My Colson, my sweet husband, thinking there was nothing left, no reason to live. The love of my life, intending to take his own life if my brother hadn’t shown up when he did. I crumple to the floor but I keep my mouth shut.

Cash gets up and comes over to me, wrapping me in his arms. He scoops me up and brings me back to the bed, cradling me in his arms. “It’s okay, Pres,” he says weakly. “He’s staying overnight and he can come home tomorrow. I really think he’s okay. I think he scared himself enough that he would never dream of doing something like that again.”

“Cash…” Tears spill down my cheeks and I can’t stop them. My body trembles with sobs as I cling to my brother. “This is my fault.”

“Presley, no,” Cash says firmly. He cups my chin roughly so I’ll look at him. “Don’t you dare.”

“If I hadn’t left…”

“If you hadn’t left, then your fight would have escalated,” Cash interrupts. “You both would’ve said things you regretted.”

“Bullshit. This is my fault,” I insist, pushing off of him to get to my feet again.

“Presley, this is not your fault–”

“How?” I cry, throwing up my hands. “I left him, Cash! I left him when he was at his lowest and then I turned off notifications so he couldn’t even get ahold of me, the one person who he needed to stand by him! How the fuck is this not my fault?”

“Oh, so you’re just not allowed to have feelings?” he shoots back, getting to his feet.

My brow furrows. “Huh?”

“So you’re not allowed to be upset about any of this. Megan’s accusations. Colson’s behavior because of said accusations,” he says. “You’re supposed to be perfectly strong for Colson and sacrifice your own mental health.”

“That’s…that’s not…”

“Yes it is, Pres,” Cash says firmly, walking closer to me. “You’re being way, way too fucking hard on yourself.”

“But he was going to kill himself, Cash,” I say miserably, face crumpling again.

“I know,” Cash says. “Hey.” He grabs my chin and turns my head gently so I’m forced to look into his eyes. “Could you have stayed? Sure.” He shrugs. “But something was bound to happen. What happened that made you leave?”

I swallow hard, then explain it to him. Cash nods and sighs. “Anyone in their right mind would have done the same thing as you,” he says gently. “Presley, I don’t care how much you love Colson or how much he was hurting. You didn’t deserve that and you deserved to get some space from the whole thing. No one could blame you for that.”

I slump over, hanging my head, and heave out a huge sigh. “Fuck,” I whimper.

Cash’s hand goes to my shoulder. “It’s okay, Pres,” he says quietly. “None of this is anyone’s fault but Megan’s. If you need to blame someone, blame that bitch.”

“Cash, she confessed,” I say, looking up at him. “That’s where I was this morning when no one could get ahold of me.”

Cash blinks in shock. “Wait, what?”

I nod. “I went to her house,” I explain. “I had my phone recording in my bag. She confessed to the whole damn thing.”

“Let me hear,” Cash says hastily. I pull my phone out and open up to the clip. Cash’s eyes widen and by the end of it, he’s even smiling. “Holy shit. You got her to confess, Presley. What are you going to do?”

“Post it to Instagram,” I say. “Tag her ass. And hope it’s up long enough for people to hear it and not get it taken down.”

“Do it,” Cash says. “Now. Post it right now.”

“Are you sure?” I ask.

“Send it to me. I’ll post it, too,” he says. “Hell, we all will. Let me call the others.”

Within half an hour, everyone is at Cash’s place. Ashleigh, Slim, Rook, Baze. Within minutes, everyone has the recording and we sit around the living room, our fingers hovering over the post button.

Cash looks around at us. “Are we ready?”

“Ready,” Slim says.

“Consequences be damned,” Ashleigh says. “This shit ends now.”

“Okay,” Cash nods. “We post in 3…2…1.”

And now, the clip is out for everyone to hear.

Taglist: @triplexdoublex@jaxbreaker@mgklove99xx@jinx-on-mars-19xx@iamnotanearthlingmotherfucker@anonymousme86@whiteleoqueen@feroniakutenpuu@hxllywoodwhxree

#mgk #mgk fanfic #mgk fan fiction #mgk angst #machine gun kelly #machine gun kelly fanfic #machine gun kelly fan fiction #machine gun kelly angst #colson baker #colson baker fanfic #colson baker fan fiction #colson baker angst

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lucky-clover-gazette · 2 years

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i think i like the four swords manga so much bc there is some just. very up my alley character and ship archetypes in there, but also the message itself and emotional beats hit surprisingly hard?

(long analysis below)

i like the idea of this character who is so ATTACHED to the idea of being an outsider and harming others, because he believes that he will never belong in the light with them. over the course of the manga, shadow link develops genuine fondness for vio, shows vulnerability through that fondness, and gets betrayed. no matter how real the feelings were between them, vio couldn't bear to hurt his friends or the world. it devastates shadow link; really gets to him. i wonder if he even knew he could have these feelings, falling for the very ruse he attempted to use on vio to get him on his side. while shadow is very ridiculous and theatrical in general, it doesn't seem fake when he expresses that he's glad vio has joined him. it also seems very real when he breaks down after the betrayal.

zelda choosing to be kind to shadow rather than mock him for being foolish is like the final straw that shatters his world view. she asks if he really thinks the light will hurt him, and challenges the notion that he isn't a hero deep down. she's not making excuses for him or telling him who to be; she's naming his deepest insecurities loud and clear and telling him it's okay to be scared. she's not rubbing salt in the wound of vio's rejection, but instead suggesting that shadow could find belonging with others if he took a leap of faith and tried to be their friend without an ulterior motive. shadow gets so giddy about the idea of doing havoc with vio, and it's like buddy, you're experiencing happiness because you like vio, not because you like being evil. i think deep down, we all just want to find Our People. and i can't stand to be cynical enough to suggest that we all don't have at least someone out there for us. it's just harder for some people to belong than others, as is the case with shadow.

shadow link is messed up and destructive to the people around him, unable to even imagine belonging in the light so he settles for chaos in darkness--but he submits, by the end of the comic, to the terrifying truth that he is deserving of love and capable of loving. i say terrifying because in an allegorical sense, it's kind of the equivalent of saying "i'm gay/mentally ill--i can't change that the world is harder for me, and it will be harder to find people who understand me, but i'm doing a disservice to myself and anyone i could hypothetically love by not trying to be my best self." it's a great and fairly uncommon message, especially for teenagers and young people in general.

i mean dude, talk about a bizarre but weirdly resonant reflection of the "gay teenager developing feelings for their best friend" experience. shadow link sets out to manipulate vio at first by appealing to his ego, no personal stakes in the game, but almost IMMEDIATELY falls DOWN BAD for this guy and becomes incredibly emotionally vulnerable around him. shadow link is genuinely LIVING for the time he gets to spend with vio, being as chaotic and theatrical and unrestrained as he pleases. he really believe that vio sees him, and likes him for who he is (which for the record i think is true, but vio also cares about his friends and the fate of the world, things that hold no meaning to shadow).

vio betrays shadow and it genuinely hurts, and that's kind of incredible for a short comic with a lot of goofy moments. and then shadow's resolution is vindicating too, he has agency in the choices he makes, and he does the right thing because he finally believes he doesn't need to remain in the darkness. he disguises himself to help the four because he knows they don't trust his face, really demonstrating the selfless desire to end all the magic shit that put him and the others in archetypical dark/light boxes. shadow link changes a lot in a short period, but the fact that to the end he believes that he still isn't like the others is negated by them saying he's part of "the body" and their friend. his "death" is very simply put in the text--"when a shadow turns to light, it disappears." it's not like a real death. it's a permanent and meaningful statement on how much shadow has changed, and found belonging and acceptance. if shadow's physical form came from feelings of spite and resentment, it makes sense that it no longer needed to exist.

and to TOP IT OFF, he does "end up" with vio and the others, if we're viewing The Full Link as an allegorical friend group or community. he's not quite as homogenous as they are, but rather serves as a shadow of the four. i love the panel where he's giving a thumbs-up from link's shadow so much. that's so simple and obvious, but honestly poetic. because like, in some ways you're never going to be just like everyone else. finding friends who are also gay or mentally ill doesn't make you any less of who you specifically are, and in at least some ways your friends and loved ones are always going to be different from you. i don't like it when the ultimate takeaway from a story is "once you live happily ever after, the darkness will be all gone," because hello??? some things never go away, and the darkness has, for better or for worse, made you who you are! qualities i see in shadow link are sardonic humor, unusual expressiveness, and a deep sense of caring towards His People/Person. those are fueled partially, but not entirely, by his not-great circumstances and deepest fears... but they're also where he shines.

you can be different from other people without resigning yourself to an lonely and unhappy life. coming out doesn't make you any less gay; seeking treatment doesn't magically cure mental illness; but acknowledging yourself for who you are is life-changing liberation, and necessary in the pursuit of happiness. these are huge and scary steps that especially young people are struggle to take, settling for resentment over the possibility of rejection. shadow link takes a chance and finds belonging, but still maintains the parts of himself that give him such a distinct personality. he is accepted for who he is, and at the end of the day who he is is not dark force whose sole purpose is to ruin lives, but just a strange gay-ass little dude who's a little bit extra but good at heart. and vio, as well as the others, appreciate that wholeheartedly. at the end of the day, the Whole Link just isn't the Whole Link without his shadow.

i don't know man, it's always special to me when an angsty character is written not as a joke, but as an opportunity to give people hope. even in the most obscure of places, even in ways that i can analyze endlessly but mean nothing to the average person. maybe none of this was the authors' intention. even if the manga was just, like, a shallow implementation of tropes and characteristics i'm a SUCKER for, i'd still love it to bits.

but i do see something a little deeper here, i can't help it. clearly the story has resonated with a small but dedicated group of fans, many of whom read the manga as kids or teens. i'm... honestly a little jealous of that. it's the kind of story i needed, and the kind of story i wish to tell. this series is truly a gift that keeps on giving.

#four swords #four swords manga #shadow link #vio #i don't know how else to tag this lol just take it #also of course you can reblog this i'm glad if it resonates with people #fs #my writing #kinda

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mountainmaven · 5 months

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Long share.

I know there's still a little over a month left in the year, but what a year.

We had a record breaking winter with snowfall this year. We had a thousand-year storm (Hillary) come through that did severe damage to our mountain (thankfully no loss of life).

A week ago all the roads on the mountain completed the re-opening process. Though many of the hiking trails and parking lots remain closed. Some will remain so indefinitely. We live within a National Forest, and National Recreation Area, just to give you an idea of why things are being handled the way they are.

Our library is re-opening today which I am very happy about and will be going up there this afternoon to visit. It's been 3 months almost to the day since the flood that did damage to our little library and forced her to close.

On personal notes: I'm back in therapy. I'm working on my own spiritual journey again. My husband traveled all over the world this year for work.

Some of you may remember back on Dec. 31, 2020 our oldest got married. She and her (then fiance) bought a house together earlier that year, then he joined the Army after their wedding. This past summer he was deployed and when he came home he told our daughter that he wanted a divorce and there was no changing his mind. We were all devastated most of all of course our daughter, and she's still healing from this. Their divorce is technically final but they are still joined financially until they sell their home. She just needs all this to be behind her. When he told her he wanted the divorce he also told her that he'd been thinking about it for the better part of a year - seriously??!! So yeah, a lot of crap she's been going through.

We helped her find a place to live, she got a summer job that then led to a full time job and she's liking it and it will hopefully lead to a job (either within that company or elsewhere) in an area she really wants to be in. She's in a conservation job and wants to stay within that kind of work.

Our son got a second job and is loving it. He still has his first job for now but that may eventually go away. In the meantime while he works a lot of hours, he likes the extra money.

Our youngest ended her University journey as a student, and is now working as a farm hand at an equine research facility. She loves it, though it's hard work both physically and emotionally. We also helped her find an apartment where she's living.

We visited our other middle child this past summer and that was an amazing trip. We had such a great time, and have been itching to go back ever since. They are finishing up their Master's degree this year. I don't know yet if they're going for their Dr. right away or at all. They've loved the time they've had at their University and where they live. I hope wherever they go next, or if they stay there, they're are as happy as they have been this past year or so.

We've done some more house projects - electrical stuff, small retaining wall, steps leading to the propane tank up the embankment (the gas delivery people LOVE it as they no longer have to literally crawl up the embankment to deliver our gas!) We have more projects on deck for next year (it's always something!). We're still helping to support 3 of our children - it's a tough world out there financially and I truly don't understand how people think young people starting out, or anyone having to start over can do it on their own? We are very grateful that we have the ability to help our kids as we know so many families can't. It breaks my heart.

This Thursday is Thanksgiving here in the US and it will be the first Thanksgiving in almost 30 years where it's just hubby and I. It's going to feel so weird!! But, it will be a nice quiet day just the two of us (oh and our oldest's dog who we are dog sitting that day). But all the kids will be here for Christmas and my birthday so I'm super excited about that.

I hope this year has been a good one for you all, and if it's had its challenges like ours has then I hope you've come through them all in a way that is suitable for you, and you have peace with the outcomes. If you're still struggling I hope that peace will come soon. And I hope that next year is better for us all.

#personal #about me #life update

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ariapmdeol · 11 months

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Alright. I'll bite. What's COE? I assume it's a game? And where would I be able to watch a playthrough(?) of it?

細胞神曲 - Cell of Empireo is an RPGMaker horror game by Sharktale Factory! You can find an English Translation on YouTube here!! It has the full game with all of the endings, and the first five Records of the DLC! The game itself is playable in both Japanese and Korean.

If you'd like to play it with Machine Translation yourself, I have a tutorial here! Please be aware that MTL is hard to work with, and can be confusing. IF you choose to do this, there is a walkthrough on how to get the best ending here!

TLDR: You play as Haruki Atou, 28 year old detective! When his coworker, Eiji Shinano, goes missing, Atou tracks his last known location to the mysterious cult called the Empyrean Heaven Research Institute. Atou finds himself wrapped up in a situation far larger than expected, and discovers a lot about both the Institute and himself along the way!

This game has everything: it has gay people. It has religious imagery. There is a headless rat. There's a mad scientist who asks to hold hands. The Divine Comedy is everywhere. There is foreshadowing and lore EVERYWHERE and it is sooooo fascinating!!! Genuinely I love this game so so so much!! There is a reason I have been drawing it for (checks watch) almost a year nonstop.

Cell of Empireo play order:

Cell of Empireo DLC: Records of Sanemitsu Isoi [YT tl stops here, after record 5 Hermit's Room Interlude Cell of Mirage (unreleased, fukao-San is working on it)

If you want to go in completely blind, I'll leave it there, but I'll add some of my own rambles under the cut! I'll also post the content warnings there as well o7 This game is recommended for people 17 and up, but I think you should be fine! The rating is for violence mostly. There are some flashing lights and shaking screen moments.

CONTENT WARNINGS (by me)

religious themes, human and animal experimentation/death, gore, hallucinations, suicide, murder, familial abuse, body horror, attempted SA (brief, nothing happens, i can tell you when it happens if you need a warning for this)

aaand some ramblings

There are soooo many different variations based on what ending you're on track for. It is FASCINATING to see lines change in really subtle ways because of Atou's actions.

the lore MAKES SENSE and adds things SYMBOLICALLY and there are LAYERS and you can theorize about stuff!!! This game is so good!!!

the boss fights are SO MUCH FUN. For an RPGMaker game there are so many different mechanics??? There's a RHYTHM GAME SECTION??? it's FANTASTIC

this is a game and a series about love in all its forms. There is platonic love, familial, romantic, whatever the hell flowerpot trio has going on, and more!

There are so many terrible dads that I was able to run a 'Worst Dads' Poll and people had genuine debates, it was fantastic!!

METAFICTION. IT'S METAFICTION (i am very normal)

Sanemitsu <3 Sanemitsu isoi <3 Sanemitsu Isoi my beloved <3

I have written so many theory and analysis essays. there is so much lore i go so insane it's so fun (LORE ANALYSIS NOT REQUIRED FOR A SATISFYING WATCH/PLAYTHROUGH. I AM JUST INSANE)

The information you learn along the way recontextualizes earlier parts so you want to watch Through it again to catch the details that you missed the first time around!!

Also every character has reasons and motivations for what they’re doing, even if atou doesn’t know it. They are all so so painfully human…. Emotionally devastating

#cell of empireo #aria rambles #aria answers #anon #please please please please #also scheduling this for the morning

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justinsentertainmentcorner · 11 months

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Hillel Italie at AP, via NewsNation Now:

NEW YORK (AP) — Tina Turner, the unstoppable singer and stage performer who teamed with husband Ike Turner for a dynamic run of hit records and live shows in the 1960s and ‘70s and survived her horrifying marriage to triumph in middle age with the chart-topping “What’s Love Got to Do With It,” has died at 83.

Turner died Tuesday, after a long illness in her home in Küsnacht near Zurich, Switzerland, according to her manager. She became a Swiss citizen a decade ago.

Few stars traveled so far — she was born Anna Mae Bullock in a segregated Tennessee hospital and spent her latter years on a 260,000 square foot estate on Lake Zurich — and overcame so much. Physically battered, emotionally devastated and financially ruined by her 20-year relationship with Ike Turner, she became a superstar on her own in her 40s, at a time when most of her peers were on their way down, and remained a top concert draw for years after.

With admirers ranging from Beyoncé to Mick Jagger, Turner was one of the world’s most successful entertainers, known for a core of pop, rock and rhythm and blues favorites: “Proud Mary,” “Nutbush City Limits,” “River Deep, Mountain High,” and the hits she had in the ’80s, among them “What’s Love Got to Do with It,” “We Don’t Need Another Hero” and a cover of Al Green’s “Let’s Stay Together.”

[...]

Until she left her husband and revealed their back story, she was known as the voracious on-stage foil of the steady-going Ike, the leading lady of the “Ike and Tina Turner Revue.” Ike was billed first and ran the show, choosing the material, the arrangements, the backing singers. They toured constantly for years, in part because Ike was often short on money and unwilling to miss a concert. Tina Turner was forced to go on with bronchitis, with pneumonia, with a collapsed right lung.

Other times, the cause of her misfortunes was Ike himself.

As she recounted in her memoir, “I, Tina,” Ike began hitting her not long after they met, in the mid-1950s, and only grew more vicious. Provoked by anything and anyone, he would throw hot coffee in her face, choke her, or beat her until her eyes were swollen shut, then rape her. Before one show, he broke her jaw and she went on stage with her mouth full of blood.

Singer and actor Tina Turner passed away at 83. RIP Tina Turner.

#Tina Turner #Obituaries #Music #R&B Music #Ike Turner

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canonicallyobserving911 · 4 months

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“I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Fanonwriter2023 on AO3

Where CANON and FANON collide!

Season 7 FANON Speculation: Buddie Multi-Chapter Fanfic - Hiatus Reading: “I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Chapter 19 is now available on AO3.

This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

“I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Currently 19 chapters completed: 718.8K Words; Rated: Mature

One chapter will be posted at a time.

___________

Here are two emotionally angsty snippets from Chapter 19 of a conversation Buck has with Margaret and Phillip and a separate one Eddie has with Helena and Ramon. 👀

___________

Buck

Buck can tell Margaret’s on the verge of losing it and in a matter of moments, he’s sure he’ll see the remnants of her becoming completely unglued.

In true Phillip fashion, he tries to prevent it from happening when he says, “Yes Evan, please answer your mother. How do you even know who he is because we never told you about him?”

Buck’s not surprised by his actions at all especially since he witnessed their dynamic the entire time he was growing up in Hershey.

“I know you didn’t but I found him anyway. I have two dads and he’s one of them!” He says a little louder than he intends to but he really doesn’t give a rat’s ass if they’re offended by it or not because it had to be said.

How will Buck's conversation with Margaret and Phillip end? 👀

~~~

Eddie

Eddie shakes his head in disbelief but he remains determined to speak his piece. “Mom, I’m sorry you feel that way and I want you to know that I didn’t want this. Based on your response, it seems like you believe it is but who wants to go “no contact” with their mother? Certainly not me and I don’t believe Soph and Adri do either but you’ve left me no choice. I’m hoping it’ll be temporary but I’ve said what I’m about to say so many times that I sound like a broken record to myself.”

He pauses when he hears her gasp.

After a few seconds he admits, “You don’t listen to me; you disregard everything I say because everything either has to be your way or the highway but unfortunately for you… my life is not yours to control. I’m a 34-year-old adult man with a 13-year-old son and a fiancé. Buck and I are getting married but you did nothing but dismiss and disrespect him while you were here. You treated Chris like he was a baby and I’ve repeatedly reminded you that he’s not 7 years old anymore.”

“You should be trying to find Christopher a mother.” Helena snaps back.

“Mom! Whether you believe it or not my son has two dads! Me and Buck!”

How will Eddie's conversation with Helena and Ramon end? 👀

___________

This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

__________

Chapter Summaries

Chapter 1 - Eddie makes a new friend while Buck receives devastating news regarding the sperm donation he made for Connor and Kameron.

Chapter 20 - Will be posted soon.

__________

Read chapters 1-19 are available on AO3.

Continue reading on AO3

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #christopher diaz #the buckley diaz family #buckley diaz family #The Diaz Family #911 fanfic #buddie fanfic #ao3 fanfic #Fanonwriter2023 on AO3 #Hiatus Reading #911 on abc #911 abc #Chapter 19 is now available on AO3 #“I'm still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”#This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

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halliescomut · 4 months

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V Random SKZ post

I watched a TT, I'm not posting it here, because I already know this person is probably gonna get dogpiled by rabid Stays, and I won't contribute to that, but I have so many thoughts and nowhere to share them. Their TT was about how they feel like SKZ and 3Racha have been coasting the last couple of years and they're not doing anything innovative and that they're not using Seungmin to his full potential, nor IN. But everything they bring up regarding the last couple of years is just their title tracks. Saying that the songs always a have a formula, that they've become predictable, and I do agree with that point...however, I believe it's intentional. Since....I would say Go Live (or God's Menu), I think that their title tracks have followed a formula. It's something I talked about on my own SKZ TT when RockStar, and also maybe 5 Star came out, when I did a first thoughts on those albums. Their title tracks, very much in the last 2-3 years, have felt like they are SKZ sort of playing the KPop game. These are the songs that need to catch a general audience, that's their purpose. They're intended for radio play, they're intended to hopefully win on music shows, to bring in new listeners. That is their purpose. That is the purpose of every title track by every artist in the industry, both KPop and western. It feels, to me, disingenuous to almost write them off because their title tracks don't push the limits enough, while ignoring their B-sides.

You want to talk about how their first few albums were no skips, but it seems like you're not even listening to the full albums they've put out in the last 2 years. I would argue that I think Miroh is one of their most cohesive albums musically and tonally, and it is certainly a no skips album. But I'd say that Maxident is also no skips. And you say they aren't being innovative, when Case 143 is one the most experimental songs they've done in terms of concept. It's a song that was VERY MUCH not the expectation after albums like Thunderous and Oddinary. And setting aside the title track, to look at the B-sides, you have unit songs, some of the most well known and well liked songs of that album, with 3Racha, Taste, and Can't Stop, which also have three DRASTICALLY different tones. Give Me Your TMI is almost the yin to Case 143's yang. Instead of showcasing the disbelief and confusion of falling in love like Case 143, you're instead seeing this full acceptance and desperation. Then look at songs like Chill and Super Board. Super Board's lyrics read like a mad lib, but the point and the purpose are still clear, that if you're focused on chasing them, you'll eventually be left to watch them soar. Chill follows in the proud tradition SKZ is known for of songs whose upbeat tone doesn't match it's devastating lyrics, talking instead about ending a relationship that was already over. Leaving aside Super Board and 3Racha, all of the songs on the albums address and express the varying different aspects and feelings of love that people might experience, giving nearly every person listening an entry point into emotionally connecting with any of those songs. And even if you're not at the level of seeking out the translated lyrics, the songs are still definitely a bop.

In regards to the misuse...or lack of use for Seungmin and IN. They've certainly created opportunities to allow both vocalists to shine and show different aspects of their talent. The SKZ Players and Records offer a unique opportunity for all of the members to showcase they're abilities and to experiment musically in a way that doesn't have to be 'approved' by JYPE the way that album tracks do. Is this the perfect solution? No. Wouldn't it be better/preferable for them to be able to showcase their skills on their regular albums? Absolutely. But they still have to play the game. I truly feel that only NOW, like right now, has SKZ reached a level of success where they have the leverage to take risks creatively. I think after their Kingdom win the reins were loosened a smidge, but they still had to tread carefully, and toe the company line. Following the records they were able to break this year and the opportunities and recognition they've received globally, I think they're now in a position where they have the leverage to start taking more risks. They've proven themselves. I really think this coming year we'll start to see even more creative risks being taken. And I think we'll see a different utilization of their vocals. We've seen them disregard their established positions, essentially since Woojin left, and maintain that type of mindset ever since. And when given the opportunity they do work outside of the 'established norms' of KPop. Look at their most recent album, Rock Star. You have Cover Me, a song that fully utilizes and embraces Seungmin's vocal abilities, as well as showcasing rarely seen sides of Changbin and Felix's vocals. I could literally go on for hours about how well thought out and constructed that song is as a vehicle for showcasing all of the member's vocal abilities. Hyunjin created such an elaborate and seemingly simple song, that effortlessly blends together the voices of the members in a way we hadn't seen before, something I truly believe only Hyunjin could imagine. You have Megaverse, where Chan very particularly wanted to have IN to show a different vocal style than he's had before.

You have Leave, which not only offers a 'softer side' of the member's who normally would rap, even in slower/more heartfelt songs like Winter Falls or Scars, but also Comflex, which gives Seungmin a chance to do something in a melodic rap style. To hear Chan talk about the skills the IN and Seungmin have, while he may not be able to provide them with the perfect vehicle to show case that, I believe he's trying and he wants to. I do not doubt for a second that he's working on tracks that would showcase different sides of their voices in particular, but it takes time, and humans aren't a bottomless creative well.

I feel like it is easy to 'expect more' from SKZ because we know that they are self-produced, and that very little of their work is done by outside persons (and those that are credited appear over and over again in their discography, which indicates to me that their input and skill is respected by 3Racha), but they are still under one of the big 3 idol companies. The truth of it is that the larger the entertainment company, the less likely they are to take risks creatively, because they have more to lose. That's why you see indie artists able to take some of these bigger creative risks, they don't have a lot to lose. And if you're a big fish in a small pond, like Ateez under KQ, then you're gonna have more leverage because those corporations are smaller, and they won't risk their largest moneymaker choosing to break their contracts over creative differences. But SKZ isn't that under JYPE. While I can imagine them not choosing to renew their contract and separating as a group or 3Racha/Chan potentially starting their own production company once their contracts expire, it would take an egregious breach of trust on JYPE's part to make them leave that company now, when their contract is literally due to expire in March of 2025 at the latest. So it's also entirely plausible that at this point they're biding their time, especially if they do plan to continue as a group post enlistment. But circling back to my point, to believe that because they are self-produced and they write their own tracks (almost 100% at this point) does not mean that they have full creative control over every aspect of their work. They have a say, and a level of input, but they also still have to submit their albums for review and approval just like every other idol group under JYPE.

i don't know if I have a way to sum all of this up, but I guess the easiest way would be to say "Don't Judge a KPop Group By Their Title Track."

#Stray Kids #Bang Chan #Changbin #Lee Know #Han Jisung #Hyunjin #Felix #Seungmin #Jeongin #Stray Kids Stay

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worthless-weight-in-gold · 8 months

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COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS

Jim is like, a "fun criminal." Like the type of criminal you can root for as the protagonist in movies, a robin hood type or even just someone who acts in their own self-interest but has important lines he won't cross. Jim is theatrical as hell but he is a fucking horror show of a man and his organization is beyond fucked up. Sure, he personally doesn't often get his hands dirty with straight-up violence, but he waves his hand to enact severe trauma to however many people he needs to and is emotionally manipulative and abusive to basically everyone he meets.

AN IMPORTANT HEADCANON

Jim is not able to be saved after university, and even before then it's extremely unlikely. By this I mean, after Jim chooses to wipe himself from all records the day before graduation and fully disappear it's the equivalent of him throwing away all chance of redemption or a different path and becoming committed to running on just revenge and trauma. Before that, he was definitely set on a bad path -- he's a product of both nature and nurture -- but he still has like a vague hope or consideration of maybe being less shitty and not feeling so awful all the time. But he was always destined to be a piece of shit at some point, he uses his trauma as an excuse it didn't actually make him shitty it just gave him something to blame it on, but there's a part of him that wants more from life that isn't squashed until he dips from uni.

A USELESS HEADCANON

He always hops in the shower before the water has heated up, and he always lets out a devastated sound because he hates cold water. He just literally always forgets he has to wait for it to heat up.

POTENTIAL TRIGGERS

Triggers he has: He has two that are both words: the nickname "Jimmy" and him being referred to as "gay" specifically (he only calls himself either when actively triggered/suicidal, otherwise he tends to just avoid the nickname & reclaim slurs because he's more comfortable with them).

Triggers when writing with him: Most of the general ones, tbh. Sexual/physical/emotional abuse, lgbtphobia, racism, self harm, suicide attempts/suicidal thoughts, torture, murder, kidnapping, listen he's a horrific person who makes people do horrific things and has had horrific things happen to him. He's like the personification of continuing the cycle of abuse.

SOMETHING YOU ENJOY ABOUT (WRITING) THEM

I like writing a character who's just a relentlessly toxic shitty person. Like no, he does not have a heart of gold underneath it all, he's just awful. He knows how to present himself as this flashy showboaty theatrical man who's actually just a sad, traumatized boy underneath it all but when you go underneath it all again he's just selfish and self-obsessed and hateful and that's why he'll never get better and never improve.

Fuck this dude, no rights. He really drives plots though LMAO and adds a lot of drama and tension to stories.

SOMETHING YOU WANT OTHERS TO KNOW BEFORE WRITING WITH THEM

He is not romance-able in the normal sense. Like he is a chronic cheater and an emotionally abusive partner. No muse can fix him or be the exception he treats right, even if it's set during university. He is also ! homosexual ! and there are not exceptions to that either because I've had some muns try to force ships with him when the muse they write is a woman and it's been super uncomfy.

tagged: the wonderful @wynterlanding !!

tagging: @mutatedangels @consvlting @sonderiings @rach8 @hxllblazer @godstrayed @manneatcr

#queue #❝ you have to know someone entirely to break them perfectly ❞ | jim about

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