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#I thought I'd have to do it more than that but I did publish at least two things here for MOST months except september and october

forbidden-sunlight · 4 months

Text

yandere! literary agent with fem!reader scenario

warnings: implication of obsessive thoughts or love.

There might be potential triggers in this story. If you do not feel comfortable venturing any further, please hit the 'back' button on your mobile device or computer and read something much more pleasant.

You are responsible for your Internet consumption!

Hey guys, welcome back to another yandere fic, introducing Yulian Prescott. I'd like to give a big shout-out to my dear friend @deathmetalunicorn1 for helping me write this and finding the perfect likeness for my character, especially when this idea came to me all of a sudden on a Sunday night when I should be sleeping instead of staying up an ungodly hour.

As always, bullying on here will not be tolerated. If it does happen, this scenario will be taken down. I'm not sure if this will be a series. At the moment, this is just a scenario.

With that being said, sit back, relax, and let's dive into the cutthroat world of publishing.

PART TWO

Yandere!Literary Agent is a man who prides himself on being very good at his job. He represented one of the best publishing houses in the country. Anything less than what he expected from his clients was unacceptable.

If the manuscript arrived in his inbox exactly two minutes past the promised deadline, he would not look at it. If his client is acting like a stupid moron at a function or royally fucking up their reputation by posting something inappropriate on their social media account, he is not cleaning up their mess. He is not their babysitter. They are full-grown adults. And if one of them is not able to produce another book that will actually sell past the number of copies slated to be printed, he will let them go. Call him cruel if you want. Yandere!Literary Agent is simply being pragmatic. He wasn’t cheap. He only wants the best of the best.

So imagine Yandere!Literary Agent’s surprise when a particularly difficult client sent him a completed manuscript. He planned on writing her an email that after much deliberation, it was time for her to find another agent to represent her. The client, Abigail Crowley, had written an adult dark academia trilogy and a feminist retelling of the myth of Theseus, told from the perspective of his lover Adriane. The manuscripts following the conclusion of her last book, however, were complete shit. Her royalties were nearly gone, having squandered them on a penthouse in a high-end neighborhood, the latest clothes, and a wine fridge. You heard him. A fucking wine fridge when she could have replaced that shoddy laptop of hers with something better so she could keep writing books and not have it crap out on her.

Half-amused and half-annoyed at this pathetic attempt to keep her contract with the publishing company from being null and void, Yandere!Literary Agent clicked on the attachment and read it. One page became four, then fifty. He had to force himself to stop when it was lunchtime and he was already at the mid-way point.

This story, it was…good. No, it was more than good. It was absolutely fantastic. And Yandere!Literary Agent did not compliment his clients’ works very often, which meant he believed at this very moment, this manuscript will most definitely become Abigail’s comeback to the literary industry. Book sales would go through the roof, A Netflix deal was also possible. But the first hurdle he had to overcome was pitching the manuscript, and making sure the query letter was at least consistent with the story that Abigail was trying to sell to him.

And he’ll make it happen. He is very good at his job, after all.

Once he had successfully pitched it with a bit of extra charm, he contacted Abigail. She was over the moon, promising to make any necessary edits to the manuscript and it will be sent to him on time. From there, time fast forwarded. ARC books were sent out, Abigail selected the cover designs for the regular and special editions, and a tentative book tour was scheduled. Seven cities, and one international trip, maybe another in the future. Sales for this book were projected to exceed expectations. Yandere!Literary Agent was very confident things would go smoothly from here. At least he had thought so.

A month before the book was to be published, his secretary knocked on his door and said he had a visitor. They insisted on seeing him. Yandere!Literary Agent raised his brow, rising from his desk and stepping out into the hall and saw you.

In the beginning, he will begrudgingly confess that his first impression of you was someone who is painfully average and out of place. A backpack slung over your shoulder, dressed in navy blue medical scrubs and looking absolutely haggard. Your eyes, though, shined with anxiety and determination. You inclined your head.

“I apologize for the sudden intrusion, I know you’re busy, but I have some concerns about the book that’s going to be released soon by Abigail Crowley.”

Yandere! Literary Agent’s gaze sharpened.. “And what, pray tell, are your complaints?” He crossed his arms. “Are you one of the people who had signed up to be ARC reader and didn’t get their copy?”

You raised an eyebrow. “...No?”

“Then why -”

“Because it is my novel that is being published. Without my consent.” You sighed, running a hand through your hair. “Look, I know it is hard to believe, I get it.” You then swung your backpack around to your front, unzipping the larger compartment. You pulled out a large notebook, some papers, and a flash drive. You held them out to him. “But I think what I have here might convince you to allow me ten minutes, if not five, to hear me out. That’s all I’m asking. This isn’t about money, this isn’t about suing your company. I just want my story back. I’ve already tried talking to Abigail about it, and she isn’t picking up my calls. Please.” You said. “Three minutes.”

His schedule was clear until the two o’clock meeting with another client on the other side of town. That was about an hour and half from now, as he had just come back from lunch. He supposed he could give you three minutes. Rolling his eyes, Yandere!Literary Editor swiveled on his heel.

“Let’s see what you have. Melissa, please hold my calls until I’m done.” His diligent secretary nodded and went back to her desk. You followed him like a lost little duckling back to his office. Once the door was closed, you handed him everything.

Yandere!Literary Editor went over the materials carefully, flipping through the pages of the notebook. The outlines and character designs were here, all written in excruciating detail and in such tiny print. He asked you random questions, going off of his memory from the manuscript and these notes. You answered him without hesitation.

“Yes, that’s correct. What? No, absolutely not. I would never have those characters be romantically paired up! Their relationship is too toxic, and wouldn’t set a good example to the target audience. I’m sorry, what? No, that isn’t her name! It’s Cristabel, not Anastasia! She’s supposed to be assisting the Night Emperor with collecting intelligence via the gossip of salons under her alias, not swooning over his brother when he’s already happily married to his wife! Good God, no. That scene should not even be there! That’s filler content and makes the character growth of the protagonist seem like the pay-off wasn’t worth it, or that he didn’t learn anything at all since the beginning of the book!”

Yandere!Literary Agent grounded the molars of his back teeth, inhaling slow, deep breaths through his nostrils. Keeping his emotions in check is one of the reasons why he has survived in the publishing industry for this long, and he’s such a successful man.

But hearing you speak about the characters, perfectly recalling the manuscript’s themes and looking back at the notebook in his hand, seeing the colorful sticky notes with edits and improvised scenes written on them…he couldn’t deny it any further. You were the real author of the book he’s representing, and Abigail Crowley played him like a goddamned fiddle.

If this wasn’t enough damning evidence of his client’s plagiarism, you had shown him an original illustration of the world you had created. It was done by an artist you had commissioned on Etsy, with proof of purchase for their services and a timestamp. Three years ago. That was when Abigail’s last best-selling book hit the shelves, and when her creative well began to dry out.

You must have caught on to his irritation, because you told him that you weren’t here to intentionally stir up any trouble. A coworker had told you about Abigail’s newest book coming out, and the premise was exactly yours, at least what was advertised in the BookTok and Youtube trailers online. You’ve been searching high and low for your manuscript, and the only other person who has been in your apartment and knew about your creative endeavors has been Abigail. She wasn’t really your friend, per say. You took some of the same creative writing courses. You eventually found another career to pursue, and you kept writing as a hobby. She went on to become a professional author and never missed an opportunity to show off her success whenever she invited you out for drinks at an upscale bar or went to fancy dinners.

Why would Abigail steal the book you’ve been working on for three years when you work a full-time day job, you had no idea. She’s living the dream that she’s always wanted, defying her mother’s wishes to get a normal job because writing is everything to her, and she would never give up on it. But if you were to be hypothetical, it might be another attempt to somehow get one up on her self-proclaimed rival, Cindy Chen, who is an even bigger success than her.

You then rubbed your eyes. “Sorry, it’s been a long day.” You murmured, standing up from your seat. “Keep the notebook, the maps, whatever you want. If you could return them to me when you’re done, that’s all I ask. And an apology from Abigail, if you’re able to get one out of her. Like I said, this isn’t about money, royalties, or fame. I just want my story back.”

Yandere!Literary Agent immediately stood up, his eyes slightly widened in fear. “Wait, please, just a moment! I know you’re tired, you want to go home…but I need to set things right. If I had known that this manuscript, your story, had been stolen, I would have never spearheaded its publication.” And he wouldn’t have. Not only would it affect his reputation, but the company’s too. Stocks would plummet, and there would be a feeding frenzy on social media with #abigailcrowley, #plagiarism, #sailboatpublishinghouse.

When you looked at him, his heart lurched uncomfortably at seeing your lips fall into a crestfallen expression. You looked so tired, so done with everything, and oh god you looked like you were about to cry shit. Walking around his desk, Yandere!Literary Agent eased you to sit back down and quickly prepared an espresso, possessing a machine to make it in his office so he did not have to walk down five flights to the break room.

You thanked him for the drink and took a sip, wrinkling your nose slightly, no doubt surprised at the taste. You must not be a regular espresso drinker, or prefer how you made it. Either way, he was grateful that you did not bolt out of the office. Picking up his office phone, he dialed Melissa’s number.

“Call all of the heads, including the marketing and social media departments. This is an emergency meeting. Now!” Bless Melissa, she did not ask him questions and said she would get on it immediately, hanging up on him. The next person he called was Abigail fucking Crowley. He sweet-talked her into coming to the office, apologizing for interrupting her ‘creativity time’ and promised it won’t take long. She swore to be there in a half an hour, so long as traffic didn’t back up. Yandere!Literary Agent played the understanding card and hung up, his smile being replaced with a smirk. Hook, line, and sinker. He scoffed. He then turned to you.

“Everything will be resolved soon.” He promised.

“Sir -” You began.

“Yulian, please.”

“Mister Yulian, I understand that you want to make things right, but…can you really get Abigail to talk? She blocked my calls, and the book is hitting the shelves in a month, maybe less than that? How are you going to recover the money that has gone into getting it published, the fees for the printing companies, and the marketing? Correct me if I’m wrong, I’m not too familiar with how publishing works these days.”

You weren’t wrong, at least in the aspect that the company has put a significant amount of money into the publication of the stolen manuscript, your work, he added mentally. It was too late to stop the printing, and the final draft would need a significant amount of changes. Unless…

“Abigail is a plagiarist, and you are the rightful creator. The way I see it, we can salvage the financial loss by putting your name on the cover, and fixing the glaring omissions as well as other scenes you claim shouldn’t even be there.” He sighed, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “Of course, we would need to have a press conference and explain why we are changing authors, and what she has done. Considering the timetable and coordinating with the printing companies, it will be cutting it close.”

You stared at him silently for a long moment before placing the espresso cup back onto the tiny saucer with a soft clink, releasing a heavy sigh. “If I agree to do this, to help with the edits, probably fuck up my sleeping pattern and might potentially be fired from my job unless I can use some of my PTO, what will I get in return?”

He smiled. “Abigail will be the one to pay for publishing and marketing fees. I can extend the deadline for the revisions by a week. And you will be paid for your time, of course. There will be no need to come here to drop off revisions either. All correspondence will be through email. As an agent, I am qualified to be your representative during press conferences, so you will not have to be present. All I would ask of you is to turn in the final manuscript on time and not say anything on social media until our legal team is fully prepared.”

“No need to worry about Twitter or Facebook. Haven’t logged on to my account in years.” You raised the espresso cup to your lips. “Too much politics.” You tilted your head to the side, a puzzled frown stretching across your face. “Any chance I could get all of this in writing? I might need to get a lawyer if Abigail tries to take it to court and sue me for defamation.”

Yandere!Literary Agent nodded. He opened up a blank document and immediately typed up the contract, including everything that you have discussed and a few other variables. Once he finished, he printed it out, handing it to you. You read through the contents carefully before handing it back to him.

“It looks good - it’s all here and I’m agreeable to the terms.” You said.

Humming under his breath, Yandere! Literary Agent signed the bottom. You signed your name next to his, with today’s date and the time.

He ignored the tiny tingle that crawled up his spine when your fingertips brushed against his as you gave him back the pen. You agreed to stay until the matter with Abigail was over, and he would email you the manuscript so you could go through everything when you get home.

As it turned out, you did not have to wait much longer for the best-selling author to make her entrance at Board Room 3. Exchanging numbers with Yandere! Literary Agent you would wait in the adjacent room until he sent you a text to make your entrance. Melissa escorted you to said room when he received a message from Abigail that she would be here in ten minutes.

It’s time. That was the message he sent you. When you opened the door, revealing yourself to the staff and the flustered Abigail…she snapped.

She rambled how she needed a book, just one more successful book, and she would be set for life. She wouldn’t lose her penthouse, she would still be considered a worthy rival to Cindy Chen, and above all else, she could still write as she had always wanted to do since she was a teenager. You already had a normal job, you had a steady income, you weren’t even a writer. Being a hobbyist writer did not count. Yes, she took your manuscript, but it wasn’t a big deal! You could just write another book when you had time between shifts at the hospital, right?

The look you gave her…it was resignation. Hopelessness. Disappointment.

“Abbie…it wasn’t just a story I wrote. You should know that. Writing is so much more than that. I’ve tried to be nice, to talk to you but you wouldn’t listen. I’m sorry it’s come to this, I really am.” You said. That was the last thing you said before you were escorted outside of the door. Seeing your part in this is over, Yandere! Literary Agent took control of the room.

“Whether it is a hobby or professional writing, it doesn’t change the fact that you stole someone’s work and tried to pass it off as your own.” He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “You are a thief, nothing more and nothing less.” Then the lawyers approached Abigail, presenting her with the fees she will need to pay. If there was an issue, going to court would not be an issue as he had all of the evidence needed to ruin the once best-selling writer Abigail Crowley.

Her reaction was….amusing.

After security had escorted the screaming woman off of the premises, Yandere!Literary Agent went to search for you, thinking you had gone back to his office to wait for him. You weren’t there. Melissa said you did stop by her desk, only to leave a message on a sticky note that you needed to go home but promised to get the revisions done as fast as you could, and thanks for the espresso it was really good.

Yandere!Literary Agent smiled softly at the hastily written chicken scratch, pocketing it in his trousers before going back inside his office. You weren’t like any of his other clients. And he would like to get to know a bit more. Who knows? Perhaps….he could persuade you to sign a contract with him, be your agent. You shouldn’t hide your talents from the world. There were people who would love to read your stories, and he had no doubt that the company would benefit from it too.

But there was no need to rush. There was a month until the book was to be released. That was more than enough time for him to work his magic. He is good at his job, after all.

Taglist

@impeakcharacterdesign

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@majestichugs

@abelheilonwife

@suiana

@lxdymoon0357

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@amidst-the-tempest

@usernames-are-so-hard-to-create

@navierkalani

@yanderefangirl

©️do not repost or use any of the characters depicted here without the author’s permission. forbidden-sunlight, 2024

#forbidden-sunlight #yandere x reader #yandere male #yandere #yandere oc #yandere oc x reader #male yandere x reader #yandere x you #fem!reader #yandere! literary agent #yandere fanfiction #yandere manhwa x reader #ns.fw #tw obsessive love #tw obsessive behavior

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ssavaart · 4 months

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Sometimes You Have to Make 100 BAD Drawings To Get 1 GOOD One

(Earlier this year, a publisher asked me if I'd be interested in writing a book on art. As we discussed it... they asked me to "give it a try" and this is one of two tests I did. I don't consider myself a writer, really, so this is just "in my own voice". I wound up turning down the offer... but would love to know your thoughts on this. Thanks)

Drawing something good. Something you like. It’s… elusive. Especially when you’re just starting out.

But, here’s the thing. You have good art in you. I promise. You just have to get to it and it’s stuck under a bunch of bad art. Really bad art.

When I was younger, I would draw every day. Filling up sketchbooks with doodles and sketches and I hated ALL of them.

Page 01: Crap

Page 02: Crap

Page 03: Crap

Page 04: Worse than Crap

Page 05: What even is that?

Page 06: Ugh

And it was just downhill from there…

But… somewhere around like page 100… I made something that… “wasn’t crap”. I actually didn’t hate it.

And that gave me courage to keep going. That one drawing made it all worth it. I was cured. I was now an expert. All of my art would be great from now on.

Oh… if only.

The next drawing was worse than any other drawing before it.

How??? I just made ART! like 5 minutes before that. I got all the bad drawings out! How did my art just go from Van Gogh to Van NO???

Honestly? I… got lucky. That one good drawing? Total fluke. Dumb luck. Sheer Happenstance.

Doing 100 drawings didn’t suddenly make me an expert. It couldn’t.

Have you ever heard of the saying “If a million monkeys type on a million typewriters for a million years, they’ll eventually write Shakespeare”?

I was those monkeys and that drawing was my Shakespeare.

I just pooped out enough bad art that eventually sheer luck was going to mean I may make something really good.

And I’m TOTALLY okay with that. I was 11. I’m not a prodigy. I don’t have any special gifts. But what I did have was… a taste for how making good art felt.

Seeing that one good drawing made me want more. Like my first time tasting chocolate ice cream. I was hooked.

So, I made 100 more bad drawings. Maybe more. And, guess what? ANOTHER great drawing emerged!

Another Shakespeare from this 11 year old monkey!!!! Huzzah!

From then on… I knew that all I had to do was keep banging away at that typewriter (I’m still on the million monkey thing… bear with me) and I would get rewarded with another masterpiece.

Week after week. Month after month. I would fill up my sketchbooks with the most horrific, amateurish, incomprehensible art… and, sure enough, 1 of every 100 drawings would not suck.

I would show it to my mom and she would say “Oh! That’s wonderful!” and when she tried to turn the pages to see more, I would quickly SNATCH it out of her hands and run back into the shadows like Gollum hiding his “Precious” from prying eyes.

I dare not let her see the monstrosities that came before the work of genius.

And… this went on. For years. Predictably. Rhythmically.

Until, one day… my 75th drawing was really good.

How? It was 25 drawings early! That’s not how it was supposed to work. That wasn’t the plan.

But there it was. A really amazing drawing of a spaceship I came up with out of my head. It had lasers and a cockpit and wings and…It was glorious. And it was totally unexpected.

Maybe NOW I was an expert and I no longer needed to make bad art? Would today be the day I would only make masterpieces?

I quickly turned the page and began to draw what would soon be my second greatest work of art and… NOPE.

Still crap.

Hm. But… something was different. It was still crap. But… it wasn’t as “crappy” as the other crap.

I grabbed my previous sketchbooks and looked at the bad drawings from previous years and… guess what? My older bad drawings were WORSE than my newer bad drawings!

Apparently, the more I drew… the better my BAD drawings got too.

Okay. So. I drew 75 more “not as crappy” bad drawings and… predictably… I made another great drawing!

I was… IMPROVING.

This went on for years. I went to high school. Then art school. I hated MOST of my art… but as I practiced… the number of BAD art I had to make to get to the GOOD art got lower and lower. Soon it was 50 bad pieces for 1 good one. Then 25. Then 10.

It took decades when I noticed… I liked my art more often than not.

It was a complete surprise. I was in my 40’s when this happened. I was SO conditioned to just accept I was going to hate my art that I hadn’t noticed that I had made 5 paintings that didn’t suck. IN A ROW!!!

Unheard of!

But, there it was. 5 good paintings. One right after the other.

The 6th one was complete trash. Tossed it in the garbage.

But, the 7th one? I liked. And the 8th. And the 9th.

I’m now 54 and I know I still have SO much bad art in me. I can feel it. Always ready to pop up and ruin my day.

But, I “pooped out” so much bad art over the years that I’m not really worried about those pop up bad art surprises. I know it’s just temporary.

I like my art now. And that’s because I got MOST of the bad art out of me and into those old sketchbooks.

I know it may seem daunting doing 100 bad drawings just to get to 1 good one. But… if you love that feeling of making that one GOOD piece of art… you need to be patient and get the bad ones out. They’re blocking the good ones. Keeping them deep inside you.

So, crack open that sketchbook. Poop out those bad pieces of art and never look back.

You’ll thank me in like 40 years or so. I promise.

(Oh. And sorry for all the poop references. I’m still that 11 year old when it comes to humor)

Poop.

#making art #creativity #artists #creating #art advice

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sage-green-matcha · 10 months

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NEIGHBOR - ETHAN LANDRY 🏙️

When Ethan can’t get enough of the girl next door!

MINORS DNI!

Content includes: SMUT! oral receiving !Fem, Ethan catching you! Switch Ethan kinda? A bit of praise!

A/n: wanted this to be longer but honestly had no energy to finish it :( but I rlly wanted to publish it anyways so here u go!

You sighed at the sound of loud music playing. It was just loud enough to be heard through the wall. Even if the song that was playing was from one of your favorite artists, you just wanted to sleep. You had a big Econ test that you couldn't afford to fail.

You picked yourself up lazily, blanket wrapped around you as you slipped on your loafers. You felt the cold touch your legs, shivering as you walked next door.

You knocked a couple of times, looking up to be met with a familiar face. "Oh uh, Y/n...what are you doing here?" Ethan Landry? You knew him from your Econ class, and also Chad's best friend. You two had been partners for projects a couple times, so to say he was a stranger would be a lie. "Oh uh, hey Ethan. I was wondering if you could turn down your music a bit? I'm trying to sleep" He gulped, feeling immediate guilt for disturbing your sleep.

"Oh, yea..yea! I'm sorry" "Thanks" you smiled. You walked back to your apartment, you didn't know he was your neighbor. You had been living in the small, New York apartment complex for about 6 months. And you hadn't seen him till now.

It was the same thing for the next couple of days, waking up at night to tell him he was being too loud or his music was making the wall shake. He always apologized, yet he never cared to change his volume before you went over to ask.

Ethan started doing it on purpose. He loved the way you looked when you had just rolled out of bed. It drove him crazy. Tired eyes with the prettiest sleepy voice. You would always wear a baggy teeshirt, no shorts underneath and just a blanket wrapped around you, bare legs.

You struggled to fall asleep, confused at the disappearance of the loud music you had been hearing for the past week. It felt strange but you shook it off, finally able to enjoy a full night's rest without any disruptions.

Or so you'd thought.

You groaned into your pillow as you heard a couple knocks on the door. It was a Friday, and you weren't expecting anyone to come over, especially not at 1 am. You dragged yourself out of bed, not caring about your slippers. You slipped out a yawn as you opened the door, this time Ethan at yours.

"Ethan...hey, what are you doing here?" You rubbed your eyes, the light from the hallway hurting them. "I got locked out of my apartment...I left my keys in class.." you frowned. "Oh no, did you call the landlord?" "He's in New Jersey?" his hands were in his sweats, small and worried frown on his face.

"Uhm, I guess you could stay with me for the night" his heart pumped out of his chest. That's exactly what he hoped you'd say. "Are you sure...? I don't wanna make you uncomfortable or anything" You nodded. "Yea It's fine" you smiled, letting him inside. "Sorry to wake you up again" you shrugged. "Felt weird without your music anyways, I'm kinda getting used to it"

He put down his bag by the couch, watching you walk Into your bedroom to get blankets. He was more than excited. His plan had worked. He had his keys in his bag and had dressed in comfy clothes so he had no problem with having to change.

You plopped down the pile of blankets on the couch, tossing a pillow over to him. He watched as you laid out the blankets for him, placing the other pillow at the end of the couch. "Thanks" He smiled up at you. "No problem, if you want any snacks you can go in my pantry, Tara makes me stack up. And uh, there are drinks in the fridge"

"Thanks, for everything" "Stop thanking me, I'd want you to let me sleep over if I was locked out" you shrugged, turning around to go back to bed. "Night, Ethan" "Goodnight..."

But you weren't having a good night. Tossing in turning in your bed as you felt an uncomfortable feeling in your stomach. Warmth gathered in your core and you rubbed your thighs against each other. You knew you couldn't do anything about it, especially not with a guest in the house.

But your pussy was hungry for touch, a pain filled you up. A pain that could only be relieved by touching yourself. You sighed with guilt as you stuck your hand into your panties, rubbing small circles against your sensitive bud. You bit your lip, holding back any small whimpers. You'd die before you'd let Ethan see you like this, yet again you probably wouldn't mind if he walked in on you.

Your movements got faster, a small sloppy moan coming from your mouth. You heard the couch creak, making you pause. "Y/n...you okay in there?" "I'm fine" you answered, melting into the mattress as you pulled out your hand. You were frustrated, almost close to your small orgasm. "You sure?" "I'm Good, Ethan" You heard his footsteps go back to where he originally was, putting your hand back into your panties.

This time you were careful not to make a noise. Only the sound of your wetness was barely heard under the sheets. Your mouth was deep into your pillow, shoving two of your fingers deep into your hole. Your walls tightened around your hand, dripping wet as you thrust your fingers into yourself.

Your mind was clouded, the feeling of your hand on your clit while the other was thrusting hard made you roll your eyes back. You were careful not to make any noise, a tie in your stomach forming. You were so so close, the possibility of getting caught turned you on even more.

What would Ethan think of you? That you're a slut? That you're gross? Or would he rip your legs open and help you out? You felt your legs shake as you pushed towards your orgasm. Frustrating and embarrassment filled you as you heard the door open. You couldn't care less though, you continued to fuck yourself as Ethan walked over.

"Y/n...what are you doing?" Ethan rubbed his eyes, staring at your position. "Oh..." he walked closer to the bed, your head still fucked out as you rubbed small circles against your clit. "You're so dirty..." a small scoff fell from his lips as he peeled the cover off of you, your hands covered in your juices.

"You're not very quiet Y/n" Every time he said your name you wanted to melt. It sounded so good rolling off his tongue. You continued to pump your fingers into yourself, biting your lip with your eyes closed as he watched. You felt so dirty, just like he said.

Your body heated up at his touch, his warm hand gripping your thigh. A whimper escaped your mouth as your movements slowed down, the tie in your stomach seconds away from snapping. "Don't stop, you can do it" his hands held onto your inner thigh, thumb gently rubbing on your skin.

"You look so pretty fucked out" his words shot straight to your core, legs shaking as you felt yourself release onto your fingers. "Wasn't that hard, was it?" Your chest raised with every breath you took, Ethan taking your cum covered fingers into his mouth.

Your breath hitched Ethan, staring into your eyes as he sucked your fingers, letting them out with a "pop" coming from his lips. You didn't think twice before you were on top of him, lips sucking with desperation as his hands ran up your shirt.

You knew this was wrong, but damn it felt so right. The way his hands perfectly grabbed your waist, lips fitting together like a puzzle. He let out a small groan as your knee slipped in between his legs. Feeling his hard boner on your skin.

You deepened the kiss, lowering yourself on top of him as you rubbed against his dick. He let out a small moan, your hands now pulling on the strings of his grey sweats.

"You're such a slut" You pulled away from the kiss, Ethan's lips on your neck. "Yet you're the one that was watching me" "And you're the one that kept going" you melted into him as he pressed down on your clit, still sensitive from earlier.

Your small, whiney sounds turned him on. Thrusting himself against your clit. "Don't be so desperate" you mumbled, your teeth sinking into his shoulder as he made friction. "I could say the same about you" he flipped the two of you over, pushing you up closer against the headboard.

He hovered over top of you, biting down on your lip as you looked up at him with eyes full of desire. You'd never looked as good as you did right there. "Can I go down on you?" You were slightly taken aback but nodded anyways. You had never had a guy ask you, you always had to ask them first. And they always insisted for something in return.

Ethan wasn't like that, he just wanted to pleasure you. Just getting to see your eyes roll back and your cum on his fingers would be enough for him.

He pampered small kisses against your jaw. They got sloppier as he moved down, marking you with his lips all the way to your waist. Ethan looked up at you with sweet eyes. He pulled down your panties, pulling apart your legs. You felt the cold air on your pussy, wetness covering your glistening core. You felt nervousness gather in your stomach, taking a deep breath.

He ran his fingers through your folds, jolting at the feel. You felt so vulnerable with him. He honestly had no idea what he was doing. He had seen it done once. Accidentally walking in on Chad and Tara one night. But besides that, absolutely clueless.

You sensed his confidence start to go down, taking small breaths. "You okay...?" "I uhm, yea...just not too sure how to do this" You just shook your head, smiling before sitting up. "Hey, it's okay. You don't have to do anything" his face was soft, running your hand through his hair as he stared with his lips agape.

"No...no it's okay. I want to learn" "yea?" "Mhm," he chewed on his lip, staring back at you with doughy brown eyes. "Just do what feels right. And I'll tell you what feels good, alright?" He nodded, watching as you spread your legs open once again. He swore you were the prettiest person he'd ever seen. And to see you like this got him so flustered.

He ran his finger through your folds once again, collecting the extra cum from your hole. Your body shivered, craving more of his fingers on you. Your breath hitched as you felt his tongue flatten on your clit, biting back your lip as he stared at you.

"Keep going, good" he felt better as you praised him, doing tricks with his mouth on your pussy. His nails dug into the skin of your thighs, the pain proving you with more pleasure. Small whimpers and heavy breaths escaped from your mouth, Ethan lapping and sucking all over your core.

Your mind was cloudy, your back arching as you grabbed onto the bedsheets. "Please please please" Your hands dug into his hair, pushing his mouth closer to your pussy. His nose rubbed against your clit, his tongue deep in your hole. Your stomach pulsed, feeling hot all over your body.

"Fuck, E... I'm gonna cum" you hummed, feeling his fingers quicken on your sensitive clit. He hadn't even pushed his fingers into you and you were about to cum. The way he looked up at you made you moan, staring back through barely open eyes. Your legs wrapped tightly around his head, basically suffocating him with your thighs.

He pried your legs apart, shaking and weak as he continued to taste you. You tasted so sweet, the feeling of you on his tongue was addicting. He tried to rub himself against the bed, feeling the pain of his ignored boner get to him.

"Shit…shit" you bit back your bottom lip, body shaking as you felt cum drip from your pussy. Ethan's mouth was wide open, licking all of the cum up like your pussy was an ice cream cone. "Taste so good" You pushed his head away while he licked, too sensitive to continue.

He admired your sweaty face, watching as your chest rose with each heavy breath. "You okay...?" He asked, concerned. "Mhm," you hid your face in the pillow, Ethan coming back up to kiss you. "Was I okay?" You held back a smile, nodding at him.

Your lips connected once again, tasting yourself in his mouth. You got why he wanted more, pushing yourself closer to him. Heavy breaths filled the room, Ethan grabbing your waist before whispering something in your ear. “I didn’t actually…leave my keys” he chewed on his lip, watching as your eyebrows furrowed. “Really? Why’d you lie?” “For this”

You rolled your eyes before kissing him again, his cheeks a light pink as you pulled back. “Fucking creep” your lips formed into a smile, teasing him. “I’m not a creep” “You are, but you know what? It’s kinda hot”

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inkskinned · 1 year

Text

something that stuck with me once, way back in middle school when i was still learning how to write - my teacher said "writing shock and tragedy is easy, it's humor that's the hardest."

i have been up and down the halls of academia. i have the fancy degree and the experience in publishing. i think i paved most of my own road with the little bricks of sorrow i had stored inside of me. i know i did it mostly with works that are blisteringly lonely. i know why we write like that. it's lifesaving.

but yeah, i mean. i also know how much people think that "sad" media is the same thing as "good" media. our human desire to connect is so hard-pressed that we immediately latch onto any broken themes. the bullied kids and the tales of inspiration. people keep saying things like "glass onion" and "everything everywhere" weren't actually good. because, you know, they're. happy. or happy-ish. happy enough. and we only value art if it's grimdark-adjacent.

do you know - people still consistently whine at me that my writing would be so good if i just capitalized things. i used to flinch. i get kind of a weird, vindictive little rush these days - i get to say thank you for the comment! i have chronic pain and this is how i conserve my hands so i can write more during the day :) grammar isn't real anyway! and now they're trapped in the room with me, you know? i get to pull out my map and show them how grammar is not the same thing as good writing.

writers have this thing. we scratch at our insides, constantly, prying our lives apart into splinters. prying the splinters apart into atoms. when we combust something into poetry, we control it. it cannot hurt us if it exists outside of us rather than burning a hole through the bottom of our lungs. it's not a wonder to me that so much of what i make comes out like a death gasp. i spent a long time at the bottom. i keep going back, too. when you're down there for so long, the only thing you can exhale is fumes.

but humor is hard. humor needs timing; which i can't promise in a paragraph. i can kind-of force it through careful spacing, but i have no idea how fast you're reading these things. humor needs a somewhat awareness of your audience, when really - anybody could be looking. humor needs us to understand what the joke is, why it's a joke, and to think - ha! that is funny. in tragedy, everyone understands the metaphor of a kicked puppy. in humor, you need to introduce them to the concept of a dog.

and forget about positivity. forget about anything not made for adults explicitly. every time i see a well-made children's media piece, i feel fucking horrible for the creators. most of the time, people see children's media as being sort of "not worth" applause, even though i'm pretty sure they have to work twice as hard. i have no idea how hard it must be to not be able to have your character just say. "well, fuck." something about a message of peace or friendship or caring - for some reason, that makes the media not for adults. like, okay. i'm pretty sure my father actually, out of all of us, could use a good book on how to control his temper and talk about his feelings.

but whatever. i write a short story about my ocd, and how it's fucking killing me. it gets an award. it gets published. i write a short story about my ocd, and how i'm overcoming it, and how my days are getting lighter and starting to flourish. i keep getting ghosted. no response. it just is lacking... something.

is this it, forever? you can be an artist, okay. but the trade off is that the things you make - if they're happy? if they're joyful? people will say it's stupid and pandering. you bite your nails off. you file your teeth. you hear something inside of you breaking.

the other day in a writing group, someone i'd thought of as a friend said: "you write so much better these days! i love what you make when you'd rather be dead."

#i have no idea what this is about #writeblr #i think u might tho. if ur an artist. u might. idk

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parvulous-writings · 5 months

Note

Did you get another request? It's headcanons for Astarion, Gale, and Halsin react to his shy gn crush confessing to him before running away because they're scared of being rejected. Thanks!

Okay I DID get the original request, but accidentally published it when I meant to put it in my drafts, apologies! I'd like to thank the Down By The River Music Box Version for giving me the focus I needed to do this in one sitting! XD Also these three are my BOYS I LOVE THEM

Warnings: None! (besides fluff)

Notes: My requests are currently open! My pinned post (found here) contains both a list of characters I write for, and a masterlist! Original character list - please request for these too!

Astarion

Before you even start the conversation with him about liking him, Astarion knows what this is going to be about. He just knows - he's been through this enough times to recognise that look on your face.

It's an easy conclusion to come to - to him, it's a thought of... 'who doesn't like him?' He's hardly known someone that he couldn't tempt, one way or another.

As you approach him, his lips are already curling up into that familiar sultry smile of his. He knows exactly how he wants to play this: "Well, well... If it isn't my favourite travelling companion... What brings you to my tent, my dear?"

You feel your cheeks burn as soon as he opens his mouth, your gaze casting aside as the words hit your ears. He always seems to know how to take someone's breath away.

You blurt out your confession as fast as your lips can manage, nothing more than a mash of words, hardly understandable - but Astarion understands with ease. He's been through this a lot, he knows the dance all too well. Before he can let a chuckle leave his throat, you're gone, leaving naught but a cloud of dust in your wake.

Nevertheless, had you been within earshot of the elf, you would have heard a rather dry laugh from his lips. To have someone turn tail from him, it's new. Something about the situation speaks to him though - it shows that, even after he's seen two hundred years of nothing but shadows and debauchery, there's still innocence in the realms. And he sees that it lives on in you. It's almost... endearing to him. Almost. Unfortunately it takes a lot to make his undead heart stir, anymore.

Unlike most, Astarion doesn't chase after you - he doesn't even consider it. In his past, he's never been one to chase after someone who likes him, he's always a magnet for them. He stays comfortably in his tent, eagerly awaiting your return. He knows you will, no matter how shy you are, or how long it takes.

Such a sweet thing... I'm sure they'll come around to speaking more openly eventually. Astarion's thoughts echo all that he knows from his past - one way or another, those who are charmed by him come back; though, he must admit, he does quite like the idea of playing this little game with you, whether you realise you are playing or not.

Gale

Gale doesn't really label your timid nature or actions as 'shyness', he sees it much more as an air or aura of mystique about you - which he absolutely loves. His scholarly instinct tells him to dive in, to explore all there is about you, and to uncover all of your mysteries. However, he knows you are your own person - if you wish to tell him any secrets you have, he's going to let you do so mostly at your own pace, only nudging or prompting once or twice.

When you approach him one evening, he's so over the moon to tell you about something he's recently figured out, relating to a problem you've been trying to solve outside of camp, that he doesn't initially notice the rather skittish demeanour you've adopted. He's so quick to launch into his little pre-planned speech that he hardly notices you talking to him, until you've already run halfway back to your own tent.

Gale just... Stands there, in stunned - almost offended - silence. Had he done something? Was it his recent discovery? Had he launched into it too quickly - given you too much information all at once? All these thoughts go through his head one after the other. He hadn't even caught what you had said, and that worried him the most: He had no clue whatsoever what you had said to him.

So it isn't long before he's practically marching towards your tent - determination in his eyes. He will find out what you had tried to tell him. He clears his throat to get your attention when he gets close enough, folding his arms over his chest in a rather defensive position. "I suppose you have a reason for running off like that whilst speaking to me?" He questions, quite tensely. As you begin to shakily explain your feelings for him, his arms drop to his sides again.

He's very pleasantly surprised to learn that the only reason you ran off mid-conversation was due to embarrassment, rather than anything that he had done. He would hardly have been able to live with himself if that particular question had gone unanswered. So, he settles himself down in front of you. "Alright.. How about we try this again... With you having my full attention this time?"

Halsin

Halsin could tell by the look on your face that whatever you wanted to tell him, it was important. Of course, true to his nature, he wasn't about to force it out of you - he's much more content for you to take your time in telling him.

So, he just sits with you, in a peaceful silence, waiting for you to work up your courage to ask him. And when you finally do, Halsin can't say he's shocked by the words - it's not always easy to hide attraction or love from someone who's been alive for over three centuries. What does surprise him, however, is the fact that you're so quick to flee the encounter. Though, he finds it quite sweet that you, unlike him, still have embarassment hinging around socialising - particularly when it is centering around matters of the heart. He doesn't think any less of you for it, a skill like that takes years of practice, and he's had three hundred and fifty years to hone this skill of his.

Throughout all his life, and his many lovers, this kind of thing has happened to him only a handful of times, so it still catches him off-guard most of the time. Thankfully, he knows how to handle the situation.

He gives you some time to yourself, allowing you to collect your thoughts. He knows that if he tries to approach you too quickly, you may become more frazzled, spiral more in your mind. And that is the last thing he wants. If you two are to be with one another - which he hopes is the outcome of the situation - he wants you to have a clear head, and know what you want.

When he does decide it's the right time to go to you, the first thing he does, is ask if you are alright. "How are you faring, my heart?" He takes a chance with the nickname, and he can just about see with the way your head whips round to look at him that he's certainly caught your attention. "You seemed... Out of yourself, before. Perhaps you would like to discuss it?" He moves to sit with you then, and even as he kneels , he towers over most. "At your own pace, of course..." He offers you a smile. It's a kindhearted smile - one that you can tell is straight from his heart. You feel a little more comfortable, and though it is a slow conversation, you get there before dawn.

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morrieandlicky · 7 months

Text

Sweet Moments Between Maurice and Alec That You Have Not Seen Before (From E.M. Forster's 1st Draft for Maurice)

Context: Forster's first version of Maurice, finished in 1914, has a rather different ending than the final published version (no hotel scene, and no boathouse reunion). See here.

Forster's first draft for Maurice is, in my opinion, the rawest in terms of boldly displaying the love shared between Maurice and Alec. This version shows much more of Alec's emotion and tenderness, as well as of Maurice's sentiments and affection towards Alec. It is definitely not as subtle as the final version, with quite a few straightforward declarations of love.

Hence, I'm disappointed that Forster did not manage to integrate at least some of these 1914 texts into the final version: it would've made the love between Maurice and Alec much more pronounced and convincing, as well as made Alec a character with more depth and feelings.

Having read Forster's first draft for Maurice, I share below some of these moments between Maurice and Alec that are not in the final version (ordered on how lovely I think each moment is. Bolded texts are the highlights).

1. After running into Mr. Ducie in the museum and Maurice bursting out to Alec.

M: "I'd possibly have blown out my own brains."

A: "Why?" he asked, stopping dead.

M: "I should have known by that time that I loved you."

A: "You can't, sir, you couldn't."

M: "I love you, sir be damned."

A: "Maurice"—never before had the word been spoken—"you're an angel."

M: "I don't want to hear that."

A: "Maurice, Maurice" his voice failed also; he had once said the rest to a woman. "Maurice - what you've said I feel. Understand?"

M: "I think so, but I want to be sure. Remember those rose bushes in the other rain? - Look at me hard - That's right. That'll do. It's settled." (Maurice is referring to the moment when Alec ran in the rain across the rose bushes at Penge just to see Maurice's face.)

2. The conversation after Maurice refuses to stay the night with Alec—a scenario that only happens in the first draft in 1914. Be prepared for tears.

A: "Come just for a little to me."

M: "If I came it would be for ever."

A: "Ever's the best."

M: "Why, man, you sail Thursday."

Alec found no answer.

...: here's when Maurice explains in a long paragraph why they can't be together because of their class difference and the fact that they're both men. But in this long paragraph Maurice pretty much brings up wanting to marry Alec—"We can't have the particular thing we want (which is roughly speaking marriage) unless we sacrifice something else"

M: I thought from that letter of yours you might want me to come. But, Alec, come where to?"

A: "I'd know if you weren't a gentleman," Alec said. "We'd a' found work together as mates."

M: "Yes, and if you were a gentleman, I'd take you this minute to my home.

A: "I'd a' been what young Clive was to you, then."

M: "He's a saint and we aren't. Leave out him."

A: "I'd a' been yours till death, then." ("I would've been yours till death, then")

M: "Out there if you get a chance to marry, take it. That's what I wish.

A: "Maurice, what'll you do without me, dear? Have you no other friends?"

Maurice dared not look forward to his own future. He rushed on the parting.

M: "And if there's ever a child, I shan't ever have that, so remember me."

A: "I'll remember you, child or none. God bless you. O God bless you, and be with you if I can't."

3. Right after Maurice puts his hand on Alec's back in the museum

"Yes, awfully serious," remarked Maurice, and rested his hand on Alec's shoulder, so that the fingers touched the back of the neck, doing this merely because he knew that he loved Alec, that he loved him not as a second Dickie Barry, but deeply, tenderly, for his own sake, beneath weakness and vulgarity.

4. In the museum, Alec in pain and acting cute

[Alec] had bitten his lip, his eyes were red too; face and body were cramped with pain.

M: "Alec -"

A: "Alec am I?"

M: "I'm sorry I used that other name of yours."

A: "Don't speak to me," he growled, "let me go, you calling me Alec when I"

M: "Did you give me away then on purpose?"

A: "You're correct.

M: "Was it to get money - or only to do me harm?"

A: "I couldn't say."

M: "Come, let's get away where we can finish our talk."

A: "What? What do you say?"

M: "Come along, Alec."

A: "Do you call me that still?"

M: "Come away, man, don't break down for God's sake...." He took hold of [Alec's] arm. The touch was not reminiscent; it hinted at a relation to come.

A: "Oh but you must, I want it." Alec yielded.

5. Maurice at night thinking about Alec's letter

He tried to forget the treacherous letter, but it stole back to his mind, and he suffered most during moments in bed, when it masqueraded as a real love letter, and offered him the completeness that Clive enjoyed with Anne.

(This is brilliant writing because we, as readers, know that Alec's letter is a love letter, yet Maurice's "muddles" prevent him from seeing it as a love letter, and it is only at night, when he's craving Alec's presence, that he's able to allow himself to see the truth and succumb to his feelings for Alec.

Here, again, is also a suggestion of Maurice wanting to marry Alec, like how Clive married Anne)

6. One version of Maurice's and Alec's first night together

A: "Good evening - sir, said the low voice. Was you wanting something? Couldn't you sleep?" It was the gamekeeper.

On your rounds? gasped Maurice, trying to sound natural, and felt corduroys. Their touch disconcerted him. Whither was he tending from Clive into what companionship?

A: "Just wait till I've set down my gun - eh aren't you trembling?"

M: "So are you - ah don't."

A: "Don't you like that?"

M: "I don't know."

A: "Christ you're fussy. Don't you like me to touch you."

M: "That's you lad."

A: "Yes."

Side notes: hopefully these will shut all the detractors (of the relationship between Maurice and Alec) up—namely Clive apologists, Clive+Maurice shippers, and all of those dark academia classist out there.

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dragon-kazansky · 19 days

Text

Bridgerton shade of blue

Benedict Bridgerton x Female Reader

Benedict bumps into you, quite literally, at a ball while trying to escape his mother's attempts to find him a partner. You decide to humour him with a dance, not realising just how entwined you would become with him. It seems the universe will find every excuse to push you and Benedict together, no matter how much you fight it.

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}

Season one

Chapter Eight - Sparkling diamond

♡♡♡

Benedict joined his sister, Eloise, out in the garden again long after the other had gone to bed. She was smoking on the swing like last time.

As Benedict takes a seat on the opposite swing, she passes him the cigarette. He takes it.

"I found bits of your sketchbook in the fireplace," Eloise says.

"Are you spying on me now?"

"You'd actually have to be interesting for me to bother spying on you," she chuckles.

"The drawings in that sketchbook were abominable," he says firmly. "I could not stand to look at them."

"I believe that is why they call it a sketchbook." Eloise looks at them. "I write in my diary, which is not the same as wiring in my novel."

Benedict chuckles.

"It must be very difficult to want something and not be able to get it."

"Eloise..."

"If you enjoy drawing but need practise, then practise," she goes on. "Hire a drawing master. Find a young lady to act impressed."

You cross his mind. However, he doesn't want you to act impressed. He wants you to be impressed by his work. Genuinely so.

"If you desire the sun and the moon, all you have to do is go out and shoot at the sky. Some of us cannot.

"Look no further than Lady Whistledown. She possesses a huge talent for writing, and yet she must hide away and publish under a false name."

"Yes, because if anyone knew who Whistledown truly was, she'd be strung up for what she said," Benedict states.

"That is not my point. Whistledown is a woman, therefore she has nothing, and still she writes. You're a man, therefore you have everything. You are able to do whatever you want. So do it. Be bold."

Eloise envies her brothers.

"At least that way I can live vicariously through you." She rises to leave.

"Eloise... are you Lady Whistledown?" Benedict asks.

Eloise laughs.

"You're an accomplished writer, always scribbling in that diary of yours. You certainly know everyone else's business. You have more opinions than anyone else I know in London. You would have my full support and admiration either way, sister."

Elosie laughs again.

"So... is it you?"

"No." She looks at him. "Though if it were... do you honestly think that I'd admit it?"

Elosie heads back inside.

Benedict is left with his thoughts.

♡♡♡

The ballroom was elegantly designed. Soft shades to light up the room. You find yourself without a dance partner, however.

Prince Friedrich was in the middle of a dance with Cressida Cowper.

The duke was standing sternly off to the side with Lady Danbury. They appeared to be talking quietly, though judging by the stern faces, it was not a pleasant conversation.

You find yourself gently, and you admire the room. Benedict wasn't here. You couldn't see him at all.

That is not to say you had gone unnoticed. You glance to your left and find a perfectly suitable gentleman looking your way. You smile softly and turn your gaze away.

Tactics of flirtation were not completely out of your power.

Before anyone could make a move, however, the doors at the top of the stairs opened. It wasn't so much the doors that caught everyones attention, more like who had come through them.

You swear you all breath left you when your eyes landed on Daphne coming down the stairs with her mother. She was wearing the most beautiful silver gown you had ever seen, and her hair was beautifully done. She looked like, well, a princess.

In her hand was a feather fan. It went beautifully with her attire. She began to descend the stairs.

All eyes were on her.

Prince Friedrich was at the bottom of the stairs. Not once did he look away. You watch with interest as Daphne gets closer, closer, and closer to him.

The prince leaves Cressida's side to meet Daphne at the bottom stair.

The duke does not move.

Daphne stops.

"Miss Bridgerton, I simply musylt have your first dance." He speaks to her softly.

"It would be an honour, your highness." She curtsies.

A moment passes between them, and then you watch as Daphne drops her fan. Just like that, the prince kneels down to pick it up.

The prince kneeled.

You don't even realise the soft gasp you let out as you watch.

Prince Friedrich offers her the fan, and she takes it. She smiles at him and then gives the fun to her mother as she takes the prince hand.

They dance.

The duke leaves. Though he turns back to look at Daphne before he goes.

In the words of Lady Whistledown, why settle for a duke when one can have a prince?

♡♡♡

The invitation to attend the boxing match came from Anthony Bridgerton. You were rather pleasantly surprised by his invitation.

Anthony apparently needed some help to keep his mother quiet about finding a wife for himself.

You laughed.

You follow the siblings until they reach the prince. He approaches Daphne, but greets you, also. You curtsy.

Anthony then offers you his arm. "Shall we?"

You chuckle and take it, allowing him to lead you over to some seats. As you settle, you turn to the eldest Bridgerton.

"Where are you brothers?" You ask.

"My brothers? Currently talking to one of the fighters." He gestures to the edge of the ring where you spot Colin and Benedict.

You don't even notice you're smiling.

"You and my brother seem to have grown rather close." Anthony points out, looking at you.

"I can assure you there is nothing untoward. Your brother is my friend, as are you all now." You smile at him.

Anthony chuckles.

"Benedict seems to have a lot on his mind at the moment. I am not one to get in the way of someone's business."

"Smart woman," Anthony chuckles.

You nudge his arm lightly and wait for the fight to begin.

As the match is announced to begin, the other brothers find their way to you and Anthony. Benedict looks rather surprised to see you. "I had no idea you were attending."

"Your brother invited me to keep your mother off his back. It seems that is all I'm good for." You chuckle.

"No true, but appreciated none the less," Benedict comments.

You smile, and he takes the empty seat beside you. It does not go unnoticed that you keep your arm looped with Anthony's. He doesn't comment on it.

The fight is intense. You gasp with every hard punch. The men around you cheer on their victor.

You had never witnessed such a match before, and you would be lying if you said you were not somewhat into it.

As the crowd stands, you stand with them and cheer along with the Bridgerton brothers. William Mondrich was their friend, and he was putting up hell of a good fight.

Benedict finds it amusing how excited you seem to be.

Mondrich wins!

You cheer along with the brothers. You laugh at the excitement. It was a thrilling match, indeed.

Anthony helps you down from your seat and speaks close to your ear so you can hear him. "We're off to collect our winnings. I shall see to it you get home right after."

You nod and thank him. As he leaves to fetch his earrings, Benedict turns to you.

"Did you enjoy that?"

You chuckle. "I did. Surprisingly."

"I must say, I did not expect to see you in attendance."

"I am full of surprises."

Benedict looks at you quietly for a moment. "Yes. You are."

You smile and look away. However, his gaze lingers on you for a bit.

Later, the Bridgertons see to it that you get home safely before they head off to the club. A place for the gentlemen only.

Anthony helps you up into the carriage and thanks you for humouring him today. Yo return the gesture and wave as the carriage leaves.

Colin has to nudge Benedict out of his thoughts.

♡♡♡

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whispereons · 10 months

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Oracle!Reader Part 5

Masterlist - Part 1, Part 4, Part 6

Warning, I guess? Like I said last part, my AU has death and voilence. This one also has frisky(?) moment, no full NSFW

You aren't quite sure how long you have been sitting on this bench. The cats you were watching have already grown tired and were lazing around. The smoke smell was still faintly in the air and the sky was the same blue as before.

Couldn't have been more than 10 minutes then.

You should get up and leave. But to go back to the main area is to back into the fray. And you really didn't want to do that. With a heavy heart, you got up and stretched.

A loud crash and bang from around the corner startled you. You peer curiously in the direction and a pained groan is all you can hear. You walk over and see opened crates on the floor with fireworks rolling out of them.

Carefully you step around the fireworks to get to the heart of the problem. Yoimiya was on the floor with crates scattered around and a bell near her. The usually peppy blonde was clutching her head with a pained expression.

"Did you just get hit by that bell?" You say with a smile. You struggle not to laugh as you hold your hand out to her.

"Unfortunately, I did. Ugh, that really hurts." She takes your hand and slightly jolts from the electricity that your skin brings. You notice her action but don't put much thought into it, you pull her up.

"If we don't pick up all your fireworks fast, we'll probably lose some." Yoimiya smiles brightly completely forgetting her lost battle with the bell.

"You would help me? That's great to hear, I'd be looking all over Inazuma City for them without you!"

You start picking them up with her as you leisurely talked with her. Truthfully you offered more for yourself, as selfish as it sounds you just wanted a distraction.

The nearly mind-numbing or annoying task, depending on how far they rolled was easier with the chatty woman. Yoimiya knew how to talk to people, truly an extrovert with great social skills.

"That should be all of the fireworks. At least none of the boxes broke." You close the last crate and wipe the sweat from your brow.

"All thanks to you. I wasn't expecting anyone to be around since the ritual was in session. It should be finishing up though." She has an excited smile as she speaks and picks on two crates at a time.

Eager to change the subject you grab the last box and are about to pick it up. "No wonder you dropped it, carrying three crates would be too much-ugh. Damn, how much do these things weigh?"

You hurriedly position the crate in your arms to a more comfortable position as your grip tightens. You weren't weak but these things were absurdly heavy. You glance at her holding two of these monsters. She's not fazed in the slightest by the weight.

"The weight isn't too much of a problem, but the size was my oversight. I couldn't see while holding all 3 boxes and hit that bell. Thank you for carrying that one. Just follow me, we aren't too far from the drop-off location."

You inwardly sigh at now being stuck with the weight. But... You glance at the Yae Publishing House. Better than being stuck with Yae. You follow Yoimiya as you get closer and closer to the main area.

"Have you heard the rumors?"

"What rumors?"

"About there being an oracle! Really, it's only spread among the kids. They keep telling me that an oni, his name is Itto, keeps telling them about how he met the creator's oracle."

So, it's already starting. At least it's staying between the children right now, by the time Yae hears about it and connects the dots you'll be gone.

"Maybe it's true. You'll need to meet that oracle for yourself to be sure." You shrug and bump her shoulder. Playfully she bumps you back.

"I would love to meet them! Believing in fantastical things is a lot of fun. And if it turns out that they're a fake then I'll light them ablaze." You were suddenly reminded of Itto by how she spoke such vicious words with a bright smile.

"What if they prove that they are an oracle? What would you do then?"

"Ask if there is anything I can do to be awakened! I traveled to Sumeru with the traveler, and it was the closest thing to being awakened. Awakened acolytes can see all sorts of sights and stories."

The sparkle in her eyes was full of joy, no doubt imagining what it would be like for her wish to come true. The thought of your very low primogem count made you want to cry. 'Sorry Yoimiya, I don't think anyone is getting pulled at this time.'

Arriving back at the ritual area you can see the dead bodies being moved away and the blood being cleaned. You doubt they'd be able to clean up all the ashes today.

"Such a shame I missed out on it. But I would rather supply my fireworks for the finale festival than watch in a sweaty crowd."

To think that everyone here has grown numb to sight... Do people become less than cattle once they are dubbed a sacrifice? You follow Yoimiya around the slowly dispersing crowd to the back.

Ayaka is giving orders until she spots you both. Quickly she comes over with a smile.

"I'm relieved to see that you were with Yoimiya. Thank you for watching over the oracle in our absence."

"Wait-What?! They're the oracle?" Yoimiya comically looks between you and Ayaka's smiling faces.

"You just let me talk about the oracle while not telling me you're the oracle?" You finally laugh at that. Setting the crate down, you sigh in relief and speak.

"It was entertaining, I promise I was planning to tell you before we split paths."

"I'm torn between being embarrassed and happy. At least you know my wish now." She deflates as she holds the crates with a pout. It's gone as quick as it came and she's back with a sunny smile.

"Well, then Ayaka please lead the way for me to put these fireworks away. I can't wait for the final ritual to see them light up the sky."

"You just saw them last week, you're insatiable for fireworks. Y/N, I'll meet up with Ayato, Thoma, and you in a little bit."

Ayaka smiles softly and beckons Yoimiya to follow her. Yoimiya smiles cheerfully and waves enthusicastically before hauling all 3 boxes. Does archery really make your arms that strong?

"Y/N!" A shout of your name and hard armor meets your back as you're hugged from behind. It was just a quick hug before you spin around.

"Gorou, all done with that soldier?" He smiles widely showing off his fangs. He's holding your arms with his gloved hands as his tail wags.

"Yeah, sorry about having to leave so suddenly. Are you feeling better now? You don't look as bad as before."

"I'm feeling a lot better now. I didn't worry you too much right?"

"I mean, I can't deny that I was worried but you're all better now so that's all that matters. Remember if you need to talk about it, you can always come to me. I'd prefer it that way."

His whisper is low, and you strain to catch it. But he smiles with a blush and it's enough to dissuade you. He's helped you a lot, you didn't want to be too nosy. He's also one of the few that hasn't used you for information about the creator too. It doesn't bother you but it's nice feeling like he hangs out with you because he finds your company nice.

"It's been some time since I've seen General Gorou this happy. Are you a friend of his?"

Motherfucker- How in the world did you manage to run into Kokomi fucking Sangonomiya!?

You hadn't accounted for her appearance since she's usually on Watatsumi Island. She's way too good, like facing a kinder, fishier Yae. Hell, she managed to beat Yae in TCG and find the card snatcher in that event. This wasn't Ei but meeting Yae and Kokomi on the same day has got to be bullshit.

While you were internally dying Gorou took the initiative to introduce you to Kokomi with a happy grin.

"This is Y/N, they're an oracle for the creator. They even have the Kamisato Clan's approval."

"That is quite impressive, allow me to introduce myself first. My name is Sangonomiya Kokomi, I'm the divine priestess of Watatsumi Island."

"It's an honor to meet you Sangononomiya? Sanganonomiya? Sanganomiya?" Your voice gradually lowers as you butcher her name. Honestly, you were just hoping she would dislike you and leave. You did not want to have another Yae-level battle.

Purple glossy eyes watch you struggle with her name in amusement. You even managed to confuse yourself on how to pronounce her name. She can't help but laugh bringing a gloved hand to her mouth.

"You must not be a native Inazuman. You can just call me Kokomi, as an oracle and Gorou's friend I can trust that you're a good person."

Gorou beams at his superior's approval and his expectant stare on you makes you feel even more trapped. So much for getting her to dislike you.

"Thank you for your generosity, Kokomi. I've heard here and there how good of a leader you are. Both in and outside of combat. Your citizens seem to adore you a lot."

At least you don't have to pronounce Sangonomiya anymore. She takes a step closer and peers at you. She's good but not impossible.

"Thank you but I believe you aren't that different from me."

What the fuck is that supposed to mean. Gorou holds your hand with a confused face. Was he always this touchy-feely in the game? You can't remember well with Kokomi staring dead into your eyes.

"I'm the divine priestess for Orobaxi, a god that Watatsumi Island worships despite being deceased. And you are an oracle for the creator. All living beings in Teyvat worship the creator, our jobs may have more similarities than you think."

"Are you saying this because as an oracle I am a communicator between the creator and the people? While as divine priestess you carry out the will of Orobaxi to protect your people?"

She smiles knowingly making her eyes squint a bit. "Precisely. Wouldn't you benefit more from staying on Watatsumi Island? Maybe not permanently but you could learn a lot from staying with us."

Wait what? Does she think that you came here to help Narukami Island? Not a bad guess since you do have the Kamisato's approval. Is she trying to poach you?

"This isn't well known but I'm on a mission for the creator. I can't share all the details, but it involves me moving around Teyvat a lot. I already have transportation to Liyue all prepared. Thank you for the offer but I'll have to decline."

Gorou and Kokomi both have disappointed expressions with Gorou's being far more dramatic. Or maybe that was his dropping ears and tail exaggerating his look.

"I understand, the creator must come first. If the tides ever lead you back to Inazuma, please come and visit Watatsumi Island."

As adapting as water, she moves past her rejection and smiles softly holding out her hand. You grab it and shake her hand until you feel a familiar feeling. The feeling of eyes watching you and ears listening to you strikes you.

You release her hand and Gorou speaks to her about something. You can't focus on what they are saying as the feeling leaves you chills.

It must be Yae.

Now that you think about it, isn't it weird how Gorou and Kokomi are in plain sight with no Yae? Her rival, punching bag, and an easy victim are all in one group, surely, she would not hesitate to come over. Unless she's with Ei.

Jumping to conclusions, you are definitely jumping to conclusions. Forcing yourself to breathe easily, you smile casually as you can finally hear what Kokomi and Gorou are saying.

"Your Excellency, I've already moved that emergency shipment to the boat. We can wait for you to finish meeting with the Electro Archon."

"You should go on ahead without me. Whatever she has called me for doesn't sound like a minor problem."

"Even so, leaving you in enem-" Kokomi's look makes Gorou shut his mouth and backtrack.

"Right, right. Sorry, force of habit. But I would still feel more comfortable waiting till you are done, your Excellency."

"Okay, I understand your concern. Please wait in Inazuma City until I'm done." Gorou smiles at Kokomi's acceptance.

"So, you'll be staying a while longer? It's a shame you didn't come a day earlier. I'm leaving for Liyue today after all." You join in when you get a chance. The last thing you want is for Yae to notice how aware you are of her presence.

Kokomo opens her mouth to speak when yells of your name can be heard across the plaza. You all turn to see Thoma waving to grab your attention while Ayaka and Ayato calmly stand and stare at you. Or are they staring at Gorou and Kokomi?

You give a wave back to let them know you saw them. Turning back with a small and slightly sad smile you hide your joy at a perfect escape option.

"And that is my transportation calling me. It's been lovely meeting you Kokomi despite the short amount of time we spent together. And Gorou, you were the highlight of this festival, I'll be sure to seek you out next time I come."

Gorou seems to swoon at your words while Kokomi smiles at your words and holds both your hands. Her stare is unnervingly deep into your eyes. Fisheyes in the game and in real life are much different up close.

"You are quite the fascinating person. Whenever you do come back, Watatsumi Island is more than happy to greet you with open arms."

Your smile is gentle matching hers despite how you're secretly sweating bullets. She releases your hands, and you see Gorou smiling at Thoma who is clearly glaring at him.

Unlike humans, animals bare their teeth to threaten. That little tidbit of information comes to mind when you see that Gorou's grin is a little ferocious. It all goes away once he sees you looking at him.

"Y/N, whenever you come back, make sure to visit Watatsumi Island twice as much time as you spent here. I can show you even more stuff than what I showed you here."

"I will Gorou." You promise before petting his head. You weren't sure when you would get to pet someone like this again so you wanted to take advantage of it while you still can. Gorou seems to like it as much as you do. His eyes close and his tail wags a little as he angles himself deeper into your touch.

When you pull your hand off, he pouts a bit but waves to you as you walk to the Kamisato's. You carefully peek back to see Kokomi say something teasing to Gorou that makes him embarrassed.

Yae conveniently turns the corner at that exact moment and scares Gorou. Seems like you dodged a bullet at poor Gorou's expense. But it also raises a question. Did Yae intentionally wait for you to leave to join the group? If so, is it because she feels bad or because she doesn't want you hearing what she has to say?

Deciding to leave it be you turn back to the Kamisato's as you approach them. Once you're in reach Thoma sweeps you into his arms and hugs you.

"What a warm welcome. Missed me that much Thoma?" You say with a smile as Thoma sets you down.

"Well, I have to! You're leaving today, I have to make the most of it." He smiles a little embarrassed as he avoids your eyes.

"Totally not because I pet Gorou?"

"Totally."

Ayato covers his mouth with his sleeve and coughs with a not very subtle "Liar" in between. Ayaka swats his arm with her fan and Thoma playfully glares at Ayato.

You snicker at the familiar sight of them fighting and almost trip over a firework stick. Your near tumble makes them all pay instant attention to you. Ayato and Thoma are quick to put a hand on your shoulders to steady you as Ayaka picks it up.

"It's a few are still missing. I'll have to send a servant to put it with the others later."

"Damn, sorry Ayaka I thought Yoimiya and I got them all. Will you have enough for the final ritual this month?"

"Oh yes more than enough. We always order extra just in case something like this happens. It's a shame you won't be here to see the final ritual." She looks to the ground sadly as she finishes.

"Ayaka is right, it truly is a shame. The final ritual is the cumulative of everyone's efforts and the fireworks look beautiful at night. I mean you could always stay until then. The Kamisato Estate is always open to you."

Ayato speaks with a purposefully convincing tone. What is up with people trying to convince you to stay? First Kokomi and now Ayato? Without thinking too deeply you reply.

"The journey from Liyue to Inazuma is pretty long and unpredictable. And there's no way I can freeload on you guys for some fireworks. Next time I come over I'll stay longer to attend it. Besides I can use the teleport waypoints."

The second you say that is the moment you regret it. Great going, now you'll be forced back to Inazuma in less than a month!

Too busy insulting yourself for your own stupidity you don't see how Ayaka and Thoma light up. Eagerly she writes down the date and time of the final ritual before placing it in your palm.

"Oh, that's perfect Y/N! Now you can continue being an oracle the way you wished and make it in time for the festival."

Ayato seems far too calm and smug for this whole thing to just be your own mistake. There's no doubt Ayato was waiting for you to mention teleporting yourself. Probably in case there was some prerequisite. Which you definitely would have made up if he mentioned it first. No one else to blame except yourself.

"Thanks, Ayaka, I'll do my best to attend." You slip the paper into your bag and smile warmly. You can't out right reject it now but maybe later on you can make some sort of excuse to avoid attending. Either way you have time and if you do have to attend...

Then your luck and lies going your way will let you have a firm standing as an oracle that won't allow Ei to suspect you that easily.

Maybe you're better off faking your death and living with the Aranaras. As the creator you should have some sort of influence on creatures. Hopefully...

"So, since the ritual is done and the festival is coming to an end, I should be on my way to Ritou. What boat am I taking?"

"That eager to leave Y/N? I would have thought you would at least let me bring up the topic seeing as we housed you all this time." Ayato's eyes are narrowed as he looks at you. His hand is covering his face and his voice sounds annoyed.

"I would never want to overstay my welcome in your estate. How could I take advantage of your kindness anymore then I already have? Besides wouldn't kind hosts like yourself avoid making your guests unwelcome by bringing up the topic of leaving. I'm simply doing you a favor."

You speak with a mocking kind voice and bring out the fan he gave you to cover your mouth. His annoyed voice melts away as he laughs softly at your actions. You crack a smile too until he tips your fan forward to reveal your face.

"This fan will be your ticket to the boat. As promised, I selected the best boat, the Crux will treat you kindly when you board the Alcor. Captain Beidou is said to be one of the best captains and a crew member by the name Kaedehara Kazuha was once a loyal subordinate of the Kamisato's."

That was actually pretty cool. Beidou is said to have defeated a hydra in her character entry. Plus, Kazuha was a really popular character. You were fond of them both and thinking of meeting them with no worry of dying sounded amazing.

At least until you remembered how the Crux was known for 'daring' adventures meaning batshit dangerous sailing. They could all survive it because they either have a vision or training. But you? You weren't a fighter, nor did you have any powers. It's that stupid dilemma about what to do when you inventible encounter enemies again!

"Thanks Ayato, the creator seems to trust them both a lot too. To get to Ritou I'll need to pass Byakko Plain and Konda village. And that little shore area with loads of monsters."

Ayato pauses when you mention monsters. He didn't forget that you can't fight right? You look to Ayaka and she's avoiding your gaze. You turn a little more urgently to Thoma just for him to smile nervously.

"You all forgot that I don't have any guards, fighting skills and powers, didn't you?"

"It's not that we forgot when we were making preparations Y/N. Originally, I was going to accompany you but the Shogun suddenly announced a meeting this morning that will be starting in an hour. Ayato and I will be forced to attend leaving Thoma the only one to take care of the estate in our absence."

You feel a bit more frantic. Maybe if it was daylight, you'd just take the risk but nighttime? You have no intention of dying to a hilichurl or any other monsters, humans included.

"Can't a guard come with me then?"

"It seems that's our only choice. The guards are necessary for the festival due to the large number of people. And the amount only heightens at night but it's a risk we'll have to take. Your safety is priority, you'll need two guards at least"

You feel a bit guilty knowing that you'll be putting the public in danger. But the chance of someone dying without two guards is much lower than the chance of you dying without a guard. It's not a bad thing to have survival instincts, you tell yourself to ease the guilt.

"Wouldn't a better idea be for me to accompany them instead?" Someone butts into the conversation (rude) with a horrifically familiar voice.

Clips of the scene "Traveler, you're so dreamy~" echo throughout your mind as you remember his first birthday art posted on Reddit during a crisis that only caused more chaos.

Heizou walks with confidence to your group smiling innocently. Like he wasn't just eavesdropping on everything. You want to scream.

Who fucking cursed you?! You managed to run into everybody you wanted to avoid! Except Ei but you were starting to doubt that you'll be able to avoid her too.

Thoma throws Heizou a suspicious glance before standing next to you protectively. You wish Thoma was able to protect you from whatever Heizou's intuition is telling him about you. There's a large chance he heard you be referred to as an oracle.

Ayato and Ayaka keep their composure as Heizou stops in front of them who are standing in front of you. Seems like they all don't want him close to you. Is it because he's part of the Tenryou Commission?

"My, what's the caution about? I'm an upstanding member of the Tenryou Commission. With a vision too! I prefer not to fight but I am good at it." His voice was even more melodious in person. If only it wasn't hiding the absolute trap, you know he has behind his back.

"Considering that you were eavesdropping on our conversation for a while, I truly doubt your words. You always abandon or delegate your work to other people too. Can I really trust that with Y/N's safety?"

Ayato's words are as sharp as his stare. His eyes are similar to the depths of the ocean waiting to pull their victims into the freezing water. It really reminded you of when you first met him. Your relationship with him has improved in bounds and leaps.

"Now, now no need to be so hostile. I'm under Madam Kujou Sara this time. She was worried about the oracle and asked me to check up on them. I am the only other vision holder that's awakened in the Tenryou Commission. I can promise you that they'll make it to Ritou, they'll probably be boarding the Crux, correct?"

Heizou, to his credit, is good under Ayato's pressure. Probably from dealing with Sara all the time. Thoma clearly doesn't trust Heizou, Ayaka is seemingly neutral on the matter and Ayato is weirdly against Heizou.

"Were you not listening early enough to be sure what boat Y/N is going on?"

How didn't you notice Heizou listening? You were able to spot Yae right away, yet you missed him?

"The oracle is clearly an important person as they are directly connected to the creator. Only the Crux could provide a level of safety fit for them."

You saw Yae first, so you were always on guard for her. Did you unknowingly relax around the Kamisato's therefore preventing you from noticing Heizou?

"All it took was a quick deduction. I'm a detective for a reason." Heizou ends with a smile. Ayato though less tense hasn't let up his stare. The tension is killing you, but you can't afford to stay any longer.

Heizou only offered to figure out the mystery behind you and his intuition probably had a hand in it too. Going with him does mean dealing with whatever questions he throws at you, but it seems to be your only choice. You can't risk staying any longer and running into Ei.

You move away from Thoma's side and place a hand on Ayato's shoulder. You smile trying to lessen Ayato's suspicion.

"He doesn't seem to be a bad choice at all. Going with him means I'll be safe and so will everyone else. Like he said, he's an awakened acolyte with a vision. Sara wouldn't send him unless she was truly okay with it. She's very cautious concerning these things after all."

Ayato looks down at you with a vague feeling of dissatisfaction. If it was up to him, he would accompany you himself. Better yet he would keep you in Inazuma. He knows Ayaka and Thoma would be more than happy with that too.

But the longer he looks at you the more he knows that what he wants just isn't going to happen or work. The nervous smile you send him makes his heart flutter. With a sigh he nods.

"If that's what you wish Y/N then Shikanoin can escort you to the boat." And if his subordinate that is already stationed there reports back that you never boarded the boat then he knows exactly who to blame.

You smile feeling relieved that you won't have to worry about dying on the journey. Looking to Heizou you feel that relief turn to exhaustion as you imagine what the conversation during the journey will be like.

"You're Shikanoin Heizou correct? I'm Y/N, an oracle for the creator. Although I don't appreciate you eavesdropping, I am thankful that you'll be escorting me."

You walk forward and hold out your hand to shake his. Heizou looks at the two Kamisato's and honorary Kamisato behind you who are giving him varying levels of glares. Flashing a smug smile to them he shakes your hand.

"Don't mention it Y/N. You can just call me Heizou, we'll be spending a lot of time together on this trip after all."

You can tell he's saying that more to rile up the Kamisatos, but you tactfully ignore it and release his hand. Time to play damage control! Fun.

You turn around to face them with a grin. You were honestly going to miss them, a lot more than you originally thought.

"I can't thank you three enough for helping me out like this. Whenever I visit Inazuma again, the first stop will be the estate. Probably when the final ritual is occurring. If there's anything I can do for you, let me know, okay?"

They all gave you their own version of goodbye.

"I'll be eagerly awaiting your next visit." A sad but happy face hiding behind a fan.

"Come whenever, I'll make you more good food!" An excited and slightly melancholic expression.

"Don't sound so sappy, you make it sound like you'll die." A gentle look that alludes to the longing hiding behind it.

You can't help but feel a sense of dread rise up. As if the next time you see them won't be as happy as you think it'll be.

But that's the future. The future can always be changed. You shouldn't get so hung up and worried about something that is so far away.

To ease your worries and the sorrow you feel at having to leave, you wave to them with a bright smile. You follow Heizou who already began walking to Inazuma City's exit.

He isn't speaking, just quietly leading you through the city. You don't bother trying to break the quiet like you did with Ayato. You don't need Heizou's attention anymore then you probably have.

Your eyes trail over Heizou as you follow him. You try not to stare at his exposed sides but judging by the smile he gives you... He definitely noticed. Slu-

"Are all oracles supposed to be as perverted as you?"

"What do you mean by perverted? If you take my glances at you as perversion, then you're the perverted one. Aren't you cold?"

"It's not that bad. I'm sure you're at least a little warmer with that mask on." Here comes the questions.

"It's broken, any heat I could retained is lost through the cracks."

"Then why wear it? Surely the Kamisato's would gladly fund you more masks. So, what's so special about that mask? Why even wear it?"

Unlike Yae who was only interested in toying with you, Heizou is looking to solve the mystery. Plus, you had him which means he must feel the pull you give off as the creator. What's the point of being the creator if it only leads you to more problems?

Like it or not you're stuck in this situation and his intuition is like an otherworldly sense. Staying silent might lead him to arrest you, you can't risk missing the boat. So, you'll need to lead him around, a plan that just might work due to his own pride.

"Well why can't I? My mask isn't hurting anyone. Is your instinct as a detective telling you that my mask is important?"

"My intuition you mean. You're smart enough to get the Kamisato's trust and Madam Kujou Sara's trust. And I have a hunch that, that mask is connected to your oracle status."

"Doubting me huh? Well, you can't arrest me for wearing a mask or just looking shady so let's make this journey fun." You say with a smile as you both pass farms and the huge tree at the edge of the city.

"What are you proposing?"

"I guess you could call it a game. Your intuition seems sharp enough to pick up on any bullshit I spew. Ask me any questions and I'll give you cryptic answers. Maybe I'm lying, telling the truth, deflecting or a mix of them all. A test of both of our skills. If you can figure out why I'm hiding my face, then I'll tell you everything."

You actually mean it. Mostly because Heizou wouldn't believe you if you aren't being honest. If he can actually wait and listen to everything, then maybe he won't immediately attack you.

You know it's a stupid chance, but you can't risk being here any longer. You want to stop feeling scared of thunderous skies and lighting chasing your every move.

Heizou is quiet as he watches you while thinking. Should he accept this? His intuition won't stop nagging him to find the truth behind you. What does he really have to lose playing with you like this? With a smile he finally responds.

"Alright, let's see if you can keep the truth hidden as well as you think you can. Is that mask special?"

"Not really, I only took it because it was broken."

"Why would you take a broken mask?"

"The price of course, well the lack of price I mean." You only fibbed a little there. You have to test how well he can pick up on lies.

He hums in acknowledgement. It's clear he doesn't fully believe it. The game was right to dub him as a prodigy detective.

"That mask has the trademark of Mr. Sanden. He's a bit of a perfectionist, he doesn't sell any masks he isn't happy with. So how did you manage to get him to sell it to you?"

He's got home advantage too. But remembering Heizou's past made you recall his hatred for sin. You can't help but worry that he'll react violently if you admit your theft. That's what selective wording is good for!

"You got me. Sanden didn't want to sell it to me, but he eventually did let me leave with it. I'm thankful since the mask has served me well."

"Are you wearing that mask to deter certain people?" That little bait was a good deflection.

"Well, you could say so. Maybe I committed a crime that would be revealed with my mask off. Or I'm hiding an ugly scar behind it that I don't want people to see. It could be that I'm living a double life and this mask is the only difference between my lives."

You shrug and pass by the spot where you met the Arrataki Gang. Not for the first time you missed them. Sara included, at least you didn't need to think hard and fast on how to fool her.

"What do you think is the truth? Are they all true to a degree? Or are they all lies?"

Heizou hums and holds his chin looking like a true detective. You look a little closer to examine the moles beneath his eyes. It was pretty cool how he had matching ones. He snaps his fingers and points at you with mirth.

"Sounds more like two lies and a truth. Or maybe half-truth would be a better description. That double life choice seems to be on the right track."

He wasn't wrong, but the answer was much farther than a double life. You spot the teleport waypoint that you activated after defeating those treasure hoarders and nobushi. Are the materials you collected from them still bloody?

"Believe what you will. I don't necessarily need to confirm whether you got the correct answer."

"Getting a little defensive aren't you. Seems like I should ask you a little more about this topic. Where were you born?"

"I actually don't know." It's true, you had no clue what hospital or city you were born in.

"Then where did you arrive in Inazuma? Watatsumi or Ritou?"

"Neither I simply woke up on Seirai Island." You know he'll probably dig around for more information about this topic once you leave but you're okay with that. How will he tell which story on your appearance is true or false?

"I find it hard to believe that you don't remember anything beyond that."

"I don't have many memories before becoming the oracle. Realizing what I have to do ordered by the creator makes me believe that my past-"

Your rambling is cut off by the scoff he lets out.

"Man alive, no need to start preaching about the creator that I've personally experienced. I don't believe your words about the creator at all. And we got quite off topic, didn't we? Tell me, did the creator order you to wear that mask?"

What a question. Perfect time to test deflection.

"Would you stop asking me questions if I say that the creator did order me to wear it? Would you even believe me if I said that they did?"

"No."

"So, you're just asking to fuck with me?"

"Not necessarily, all these questions are just steppingstones to the truth."

"Fancy way to say that you'll ask me anything and everything."

"Glad to hear that you've already accepted your fate." This little shit.

You slow down your pace while passing by the temple. You feel a bit tempted to enter it to admire the murals. Heizou stops to watch you stare up at it in amazement. For an 'oracle' you seem mesmerized by the temple.

You jump a little as Heizou slings a arm around your shoulder and pulls you along the path again. Konda village is in sight and his breath is fanning over your ear.

"So, tell me Y/N, do you at least remember what region you were born in? Or at least lived in before becoming an oracle? Y/N isn't a very common name, in fact you're the first person I've met with that name."

"Well, I'm quite sure I wasn't born in Inazuma. I wouldn't call Seirai Island a home either." You nearly whisper as you stare straight into his eyes. You refused to be psyched out, not after all the other authorities you tricked on Earth.

He lets go of you and walks a little ahead of you. Frowning in confusion you speed up to match his pace. You barely catch the way his smile wavers a little and his hand toys with the baton on his hip. Was the previous proximity affecting Heizou too?

"What's wrong Heizou? For someone who I pegged as the teasing type you sure can't handle your own consequences."

Heizou smiles a littler wider contradicting how his eyebrows furrow. There's a large chance you're a criminal, something like that shouldn't have affected him so strongly. So why did you? Why did the heat of your body and smell of something sweet on you make him fumble like that?

"Speak for yourself, your heart was beating out of your chest."

"Even noticed my heartbeat huh? Sounds like you've got some sort of crush."

"You wish now stop trying to distract me. In fact, what about those writings on the temple walls made you so distracted."

"They were writing?" You questioned instinctively and immediately regretted it. The smile Heizou wears is victorious.

"Yes, it was. Do you know how to read?"

"No. Or at least not that well."

"Heh so that's a yes, just not in this language."

"Basically."

"Interesting and very believable. That writing was very old, but it was written in the universal language with Inazuma dialect. Meaning you should be able to at least recognize it as writing, but you didn't."

You're nervous but you calmly cross the stone bridge into Konda village. Heizou seems to want to ask something but the yells from parents interrupt him.

"Takeru! Takeru, you little rascal it's bedtime! Where are you?! Oh, where is he?" An older woman is calling out for Takeru who seems to be a child judging by the bedtime.

"Futaba! It's nighttime, it's not safe to be out this late! Futaba!" A much older woman with white hair is calling out too. You and Heizou pass by them a little concerned.

The sky is darkening but it's not pitch black just yet. Those children should probably still be out playing or something. Heizou hums and sweeps his eyes across the village.

"After I drop you off, I'll come back to make sure those kids came back fine."

"Is it normal for children to play without supervision?" The thought of kids playing outside when there are literal monsters around sounds unbelievable.

"It's quite common especially around villages like this where only elderly and children live. This is a farming village too so they're likely playing on the farm."

You nod and follow Heizou to leave the village by going under the flimsy looking gate. The sickle you picked up and put in your bag on whim still makes you uneasy. Your gut feeling made you pick it up and you aren't quite sure what to do with it now.

"I haven't forgotten about your slip up. So, either you lied about knowing how to read or you know how to read in a different language that has no roots in the universal language."

This guys just does not miss a beat. As you get closer to the beach area that leads to Ritou, you see a teleport waypoint. You couldn't activate the one in Inazuma City due to the crowd and Yae but this one could be used to your advantage.

You stop at the waypoint making Heizou look at you in confusion. You place a hand on the waypoint and relish in the new gold color it turns. Smugly you look to see Heizou staring at the waypoint with a shocked expression.

"Man alive, how did you-?"

He's cut off by a scream. It sounds like a young boy and you both look at each other in alert. Immediately Heizou turns and runs down the steps onto the shore with you following him.

The scream is joined by another scream sounding like a girl. You and Heizou follow it to the right and run past the waterfall and follow the dirt path. Blindly passing by a hilichurl camp you see a Fatui Hydrogunner and an Electrohammer.

You freeze up in fear as you watch a boy be slung over the Hydrogunner's shoulder and a girl try to crawl away from the Electrohammer. Heizou wastes no time to deliver an anemo infused punch to the Electrohammer giving the girl a chance to stand up.

You take a deep breath and move closer to hold the girl. She clings onto you in fear as she weeps loudly. You watch in a daze as Heizou continues dealing blows to the Electrohammer. At least until the Hydrogunner makes his move.

"Freeze or the boy drowns."

All three of you freeze as the Hydrogunner points to his gun to the boy's head. The Electrohammer hits Heizou straight in the chest with the war hammer knocking him back.

"Heizou!" You yell as you watch him hit the ground harshly. You yelp in pain when you're suddenly lifted up harshly by your neck. Struggling in his grasp uselessly until he squeezes your neck and throws you over his shoulder. The girl cowers and cries as she's yanked onto the other side.

Heizou stands up but stays in place as the Hydrogunner keeps the gun to the boy's head. You're about to wrap your hands around the Electrohammer's neck when he speaks.

"I wouldn't do that unless you want the boy to get blown to pieces."

You freeze before hanging limply over his shoulder. Everything is quiet save for the children's sobs. The Electrohammer starts walking farther from the city and the Hydrogunner does the same but slower.

You can only watch as Heizou's furious face gets smaller and smaller. They bring you and the kids to a camp close to Araumi. You land roughly on the floor with rope tied around you. A Anemoboxer who was waiting at their camp ties up the kids and drops them next to you. You give one last scathing glare before they close the tent flap.

Tense, you wait a few moments until you hear the muffled sounds of them talking. You turn back to look at the scared kids next to you.

"Hey, hey it's okay. We're going to get out of this, okay? Did you see that guy with me? He's a friend and he's really strong too. He's gonna get us out of here."

Their sobs slow down at your words and they look up at you. They have little scratches and scraps from trying to escape the Fatui.

"I want to go home, I wanna see Granny." "Are they going to take us?"

You shush them quietly to stop them from working themselves up into a crying fit.

"Me and my friend are going to make sure you get home safe. Why don't you both tell me your names? Mine is Y/N and my friend is called Heizou."

"I'm Takeru and she's Futaba." Takeru speaks with a waver as Futaba nods tearfully. They're still scared and the conversation between the Fatui is slowly turning into an argument.

"It's nice to meet you both, now I need you both to be brave and stay quiet for me." They both nod and you smile trying to offer some comfort. You couldn't let them take you and the kids' hostage again.

The ropes are tight around your torso and wrists, but they underestimated you. There is a pole in the middle of the tent with a wheel but it's the gear behind it that matters.

Carefully you move your legs until they are bent underneath you. You stand up and stumble a little to the gear. You can feel the sharp edges around the gear and smile.

At first you try to cut the large rope around your torso, but the rope is too thick and strong. You move your back higher against the pole so that the rope around your wrists is the one being cut.

Takeru and Futaba watch you in a mixture of fear and hope. You smile when you feel the rope give away and fall to the ground. With your hands free, you struggle a little to shimmy your bound arms to your front.

It's like wearing a really tight shirt with your arms still in it. Uncomfortable but not super painful. Once it's done you move to your bag that was thrown on the ground. Carefully you kneel and open it.

The game screen is deeper in the bag, and you shove your hand in to select the sickle you took from Konda village. When you pull your hand out it's weakly holding the sickle.

The kids smile as hope becomes clearer. The argument outside is getting louder. Yells of "this wasn't the plan!" and "we have to do it!" are making you increasingly worried.

Carefully you maneuver the sickle to cut the ropes without cutting your own shirt. The ropes break and you stretch your arms to get the blood flowing.

"Alright, I'm gonna get you both free but you have to stay quiet and listen to me or we'll get caught again."

They nod eagerly and you move behind them. You cut off the ropes and they stand up in a flash. But the loud sound of a punch cuts your victory short. Takeru and Futaba huddle closer to you in fear.

You smile kindly and hold out your free hand to them.

"Hold onto me, be prepared to make a run." They nod and grasp your arm as the sound of fighting gets louder. You walk closer to the tent flap and lift it to see the outside.

Heizou is fighting them all with a few wounds. The hit he took earlier must still be affecting him. This was not a good match up. Although the elemental shields aren't up yet, it wasn't an easy fight.

The Anemoboxer and the Hydrogunner are both healing and the Electrohammer is giving heavy electro blows. Not even mentioning the swirl that's happening. Once those shields come up, Heizou will have even more work to do.

The minute they have one of you hostage is when the fight is over. You can't let that happen. You can dodge but the kids can't. You eye the path and turn back to the kids.

"Listen carefully, you saw that dirt path they took us on? You need to follow it back to where me and Heizou found you. Just stay there and wait, okay? If anyone that you don't recognize starts coming. just hide."

You would rather them go straight back to Konda village, but you didn't want them at the mercy of the hilichurls either. They tremble but nod at your words.

You look out the flap sneakily and suck in a breath as the Anemoboxer starts heading towards the tent you all are at. Quickly you throw it open and drag the kids out with you.

The fighting freezes for a moment as the flap hits the Anemoboxer in the face and you push the kids in front of you. The Electrohammer and Hydrogunner look at you in surprise.

"Run!"

This springs the kids into action and Heizou delivers a charged up anemo punch to the Hydrogunner. Rain starts to fall, and the elemental shields were thrown up. The Anemoboxer has just doubled in your dangerous rating. The Anemoboxer reaches out for you making you jump back.

You just need to keep the Anemoboxer away from Heizou who's dealing with the other two Fatui Skirmishers. You keep dodging and running circles around him. You were mostly afraid of him using anemo to pull you in.

The fights weren't like watching it in the game. These guys bleed even while encased in the war machines. You hear the groan of the Hydrogunner passing out and smile crookedly. Was this fight finally going to be over soon?

The Anemoboxer leaves you to fight Heizou and you finally take a breather. Heizou doesn't stick to the Genshin game rules either. His catalyst follows him as he mixes up his normal attack pattern. Horrible timing but it's really cool watching him use anemo in creative ways that the game never showed.

The enemies seem to be in a rougher state. There's a three way stand off as they all stop to catch their breath. You see movement behind Heizou and feel your blood run cold.

"Heizou behind you!"

Heizou follows your words and just barely dodges the water blast from the Hydrogunner that was slowly getting back up. With one last fully charged kick to the head, the Hydrogunner falls down. The loud crack lets you know that he may never get up again.

The other two Fatui don't let the opportunity slip. With the Anemoboxer dragging Heizou closer, the Electrohammer slams the hammer down onto Heizou. You clench the sickle in your hand tighter as you can only watch in horror.

You stayed out of the fight for a reason, you couldn't fight you would only be in the way. But that's not an option anymore. Hearing his pained groans as he's punched by the Anemoboxer swirling the electro and rain spurs you into action.

While the Anemoboxer's back is turned you sneak up and raise the sickle. The spot in his back with no armor covering it seems to call to you. You slam the tip of the blade straight into it making him cry out.

You pull it out in a hurry and jump back as the wound bleeds more. The Electrohammer looks at you in surprise giving Heizou a long enough breather to get back up.

The Electrohammer and Heizou go straight back to combat as the Anemoboxer faces you. His huge gauntlets swing around trying to hit you as he coughs up blood. The ground is slippery, and it makes your dodging a little harder.

You jump closer to the boxer making him throw up his shield in reflex. Using the rain, you slide around him and slash his thigh to limit his speed.

The sickle's weight was clumsy at first but the more you traded blows using it, the more you came to master it. Gritting your teeth, you quickly stand back up after slipping from the wet ground.

Silently you urge Heizou to hurry up, you weren't sure how much more you could take. Your mask was starting to crumble but you pushed it to the back of your mind.

The boxer runs up to you in a flash not letting you back away fast enough. Reflexes are what save you from a punch to the face as you crouch and roll away. He's still bringing his fist back to defend himself giving you an opening.

You can tell something is different as you swing your sickle. Something about you is different that makes you wonder if you'll be able to finish the boxer once and for all.

Electro crackles around the sickle as you puncture his chest. The electro-charged reaction and wound seem to do the trick. The boxer stumbles and gasps for air.

You watch in horror and relief as the boxer falls onto the floor. You really killed again, and you used elemental to do so. You don't have a moment to stew on that though as you hurriedly dodge the now furious Electrohammer. The war hammer slams onto the ground and Heizou is quick to kick a projectile anemo shot to his face.

It knocks him to the ground, and you watch with unknown feelings as the mask he wears breaks. The fight is over, you and Heizou won. There's no time to wallow in self-pity, not as Heizou stumbles with a dazed expression.

You're quick to support him and he lays his bleeding head on you. You gently move his arm to wrap around you and do the same for him. His wounds aren't life threatening or serious, but he's been bleeding for a while. You need to stop the bleeding first.

Helping him gently you move him to lean against a small boulder. In a rush you go back to the tent and open your bag. You take out some of the leftover medical supplies you kept (stole) from the Kamisato Estate.

Slinging the bag back on you hurry to Heizou. The rain seems to be letting up as you examine him. His head is bleeding from a cut, so you bandage it first. His shirt is dyed red, and you lift it up and wince at the sight.

Multiple bruises and cuts cover his stomach and chest. That's gonna be a bitch to bandage, especially considering how much damage his back too.

"Sorry Heizou, this'll hurt." Heizou only weakly groans with his eyes screwed shut in pain.

Pushing the shirt as high as you can, you start wrapping it around him. Not the best solution but it's your only one with so little supplies. Heizou's consciousness seems to come and go as you finish and fix his shirt.

The thought of Heizou closing his eyes and falling asleep in such a state worries you. What if he passes out from blood loss and dies? Thoughts like that rise up and you grasp for anything to keep him awake.

"Hey Heizou, if you can respond to me in words. I'll tell you a big hint to my secret."

His eyes focus on you a little more. That's a good sign, nothing like baiting a detective like him with leads.

"Well, *cough* what hint are you *cough* going to give me?" His raspy voice and coughs worry you, but they seem to make him more awake.

"You were really close on me having a second life."

"That's it? That's a *cough* crappy hint."

You laugh at his remark trying to hide your relief. The fear of holding another cold body of someone you cared about still plagues you.

"If you want a better hint then you better drag it out of me as I drag you back to Konda village."

You support him as he chuckles at your words. He does his best to not lay too much weight on you but that's hard when his head is fuzzy.

The walk is quiet and with him so close you relish in the sound of his harsh breathing. It lets you know that he's still breathing, that you didn't fail.

You don't want to think about the person you just killed. So, your mind analyzes about the electro you wielded through the sickle instead. It makes a lot of sense that you can use the elements through a weapon as a medium. How could you have not realized that possibility?

If you continued training with it, could you eventually use electro without a weapon? Probably not but the idea of shooting electro is cool, nonetheless.

Takeru and Futaba are waiting nervously in the spot you instructed. You smile at the sight and wait till you are closer to call out.

"Futaba, Takeru! Over here!"

They smile at the sight of you both and run to meet you. Futaba frowns in worry at the sight of Heizou and you injured. Takeru tries to help by supporting his other side.

Heizou buries his head in the crook of your neck to hide the grimace of pain as Takeru touches the wounded area.

"Takeru, Futaba can you guys guide us to Konda village? It's an important job since we don't want to get ambushed by enemies."

Eyes wide they nod and walk a little ahead. They survey the surroundings seriously and nod at you firmly to show that it's safe.

Heizou keeps his head on your shoulder and mumbles. "Thanks, guess you're as perceptive as I thought."

You huff in amusement and continue supporting him until you all get to Konda village. The two women that were looking for the kids earlier spot you all and rush over.

They both hug their respective family members with tears in their eyes. It's clear that the kids aren't over the dangerous encounter.

"Thank you so much for saving Takeru and Futaba. You both seem very injured, please come to my house. I have some supplies that can help you both."

The village chief approaches you and Heizou with concern. You nod gratefully and help Heizou into the house. There's a small cot on the floor and Heizou lays down on it slowly.

Konda Densuke, the village chief comes back with a fully stocked medical kit. It's more primitive than the ones you are used to in Earth, but it'll work well enough.

"I'll leave you to it, once you're done, please come outside. I'll have something that can help that young man."

Quietly you thank the old man and turn back to Heizou as the door closes.

"I'm about to get pretty personal with your body, that's not a problem, right?"

"Why are you asking as if you weren't doing that earlier? Of course, it's fine, just don't be so obvious with your staring."

"If you weren't injured, I would hit you myself."

He chuckles and removes his cracked arm guards. You focus on taking out the bandages and ointment out of the kit. You leave briefly to wet a rag with water and come back to see Heizou shirtless sitting on the cot.

He smiles up at you seemingly more aware and alert. His bandages around his torso are stained red. Smaller cuts and scrapes cover his arms and legs. The bandage on his forehead is bleeding a lot less than before.

You kneel beside him and carefully remove the bandage on his head. Heizou bears the pain of you wiping away the dirt and applying the ointment well. The new patch is put on his head and your hands move lower to the bandages around his torso.

After unraveling it, you feel relieved that nothing has become inflamed or infected yet. The bruises on his back and front are tended to before you clean the cuts. You firmly wrap the new bandage around his torso. He only tenses up as you finish.

"This is only a temporary solution. Once we get to Ritou you should see a doctor."

"I will, I promise but I must say. This is some pretty good work, like you have experience doing this kind of thing. Care to tell me who you've helped before?"

He really is a nuisance. He was almost killed in a bad match up with three Fatui Skirmishers and his first instinct after properly waking up is to question you?

"Seriously? Not even a thank you? And my expertise comes from taking care of myself if you must know." Scowling with no real annoyance you put away the remaining supplies back into the med kit.

Heizou laughs at your reaction before placing a hand on your shoulder. He rests his head on the opposite shoulder and speaks softly. What is with this guy and leaning on you?

"You're right, thank you Y/N. Even with my suspicions, I'm still thankful that you helped me and those kids. I'm hoping that whatever secret you're hiding isn't one I'll ever have to arrest you for."

HIs bare bandaged chest against your back makes you embarrassed.

"Aren't you a bit too up close and personal with someone you're suspecting?" You say stiffly as he proceeds to melt even further into you.

"Getting shy?" He whispers teasingly. His face is dangerously close to your neck making you tense up further. You already knew that he was a flirt but isn't he moving too fast?!

Your face gets redder as his breath grazes your neck. People have tried to trick you in numerous ways before. That includes pretending to have fallen in love with you for information. Seduction never worked on you due to how untrusting you are.

But in Teyvat? Where the characters you found comfort in and loved? It was hard not to be affected or overthink things like this. While you were avoiding looking at him, Heizou took his time admiring you.

The flustered look on your face, your fingers drumming on your thigh. It was adorable how nervous you were. For a split second he remembered how comfortable you were around the Kamisato, how brightly you smiled. Did you get all flustered around them like this too?

A flash of jealousy engulfs him, and his body seems out of his control. His teeth lightly nip your neck making you stand up in a flash. Your voice is steady, but your heart is beating out of control.

"I'm going to see what the village chief had for you. Just stay here."

Watching you leave in a hurry makes him realize what he just did. Man alive, what the hell made him act like that? Despite the slight guilt from overstepping a boundary, he honestly didn't regret it. If he had a chance, he'd probably do it again.

When you come back in with two plates and a cup. Your face was back to normal, and your posture was relaxed.

"They were nice enough to make us some food and a drink to help with your blood loss. It's some citrus juice so make sure to drink it all."

Sitting down next to him, you pass him the cup and a plate. You eat the food and Heizou follows your lead. It's fine if you don't want to touch on what happened. Frankly he's still unsure why he's become so enamored by you as well. But at least he has a better grasp on you and your secret.

After eating everything you both return the dishes and thank the chief. The elderly women, Takeru, and Futaba all come out despite the dark sky. They thank you and Heizou asking if you need anything.

"Don't worry, I'm just glad no one got seriously hurt." Heizou tries to elbow you with playful intent, but you move out the way with a smile.

"Why don't you both stay the night? Those injuries must still be bothering you. We have extra room."

You only had some minor bruising compared to Heizou. The cuts and scrapes were no more than an itch to you. These kinds of injuries were normal to you on Earth. And you really couldn't afford to waste any more time.

"Thanks for the offer but we have to get to Ritou before the stars come out. Please stay safe."

You wave to them one last time before arriving back at the shore area.

"Seems like there's no more children being kidnapped, let's get across this area fast."

Heizou on the other hand seems content to just stroll along. Well, that wouldn't work for you, you could not miss the Crux. You stop letting Heizou walk a little ahead of you. He notices your absence and stops to look back at you in confusion.

You run past him and grab something from his side. You slow your sprint a little to face him as you raise your prize.

"If you want your jitte back then you'll have to catch me!" Spinning around you face Ritou's direction and continue running. You can hear Heizou kick sand as he chases after you.

He honestly could care less about his jitte. It's the sight of you smiling brightly as he tries to grab you that makes him continue chasing you. The wounds and injuries from the fight still ache but it's worth the pain. You're worth the pain.

You'll be leaving soon. You might be a fraud. Logic says that being so fixated on you so soon is dangerous and stupid. Yet his smile never leaves his face as he finally snatches his jitte out of your hand.

His intuition screams at him that you're so much more. That whatever you're hiding will bring him happiness of a lifetime. That you will bring him that happiness.

You stumble onto the stone pavement in Ritou as Heizou keeps his hand on your shoulder. You're both calming down from laughing at him nearly falling face first into the sand.

"How didn't you see that pile of crabs? Too distracted by me to focus?"

"What if I was? You can't tell since you nearly passed out from laughing at me."

"You can't blame me for that! I would pay good money to have seen you actually fall face first."

You walk past Ritou's town square as the docks and inspection tent get into view.

"Money huh? Is that the currency in your old world?"

You continue walking casually but there's no denying how you almost froze up.

"Is that the conclusion you've come to after all the questions?"

"My intuition tells me that I've barely scrapped the surface but I'm all out of leads. For now, my suspicion is that you come from another world similar to the traveler. Although I'm not sure if the creator ordered you to keep your identity secret. You do seem to be an oracle for them."

Psychology really was amazing. By getting Heizou so worked up about your mask, you managed to have him believe you to be an oracle. The minor fact of you not being from this world makes him feel accomplished in a sense. You let him figure out one secret to hide a bigger one.

"You really are a great detective. No one else has realized I'm not from this world but you. But that didn't answer my original question in the game. It seems like you lost Heizou, no secrets for you."

Stopping at the end of the stairs Heizou looks at you seriously.

"I really hate leaving mysteries unsolved."

"Then you'll just have to handle me being the mystery left unsolved."

"What if I just took your mask off right now? We both know I'd catch you even if you tried to run. Or better yet I could arrest you for any stupid reason just to take it off."

You can't stop the laughter that bubbles up inside you. You wipe the moisture from your eyes as your laughter turns to giggles. The main reason you were okay with traveling with Heizou despite his intense need to solve mysteries is because...

"That would utterly destroy your pride. I know that you dislike fighting, that the moment you're forced into combat while solving a mystery is when you feel like you lost. You take so much pride in becoming a detective that having to resort to force would be a low you'd never stoop down to reach."

He turns away with a relaxed stance. His head angled to the ground with a nostalgic smile.

"Guess you must have found out some of my private information through the creator. But you're right, I would never do that."

It's quiet as you two resume walking to the inspection tent. Ah crap, does the fan work as an ID for you too?

There's no line due to how late it is but there is a familiar person.

"Sara?"

She turns away from the inspector and looks at you with some confusion. The sight of Heizou next to you, so close to you, makes her frown.

"Y/N, a pleasure to see you again. I can only assume that you are leaving under the creator's orders but what are you doing with Shikanoin?"

"But didn't you ask him to check up on me?"

...That little shit.

Sara glares at Heizou as you mentally put the pieces together. Sara sees Heizou as someone irresponsible. There's a very low chance of her entrusting someone connected to the 'creator' like you to him. She would rather do it herself.

Ayato was right when he said that Heizou tends to skip or delegate regular Doushin duties to others. And that's because he has no interest in those jobs. Sara probably knows that full well and would rather avoid that outcome. Plus, Heizou even asked where you arrived on Inazuma even though you already told Sara that you woke up on Ritou.

"Shikanoin, that is not acceptable behavior for a Doushin. What explanation do you have for yourself?"

Sara's stern voice bounces off Heizou who is far too used to it. You didn't bother stepping in. Not only were you curious how he got to know all your previous information, but the sneaky bastard deserved it.

"Madam you really can't blame me for investigating on my own accord. Not only have there been some subtle rumors about a mysterious oracle, but you kept glancing at Y/N during the festival. As Y/N already knows, I listened in on their conversation with the Kamisato Clan for a bit before introducing myself."

"Even still, you know the proper procedures to investigate something. Now that you've already interrogated them, you should leave them be- What are those wounds?"

Sara's exasperated voice turns cold when she looks closer at you and notices the minor cuts on you.

"Were you attacked on the way here? Not only did the oracle get injured but you also investigated them in this state?"

Maybe you should step in now, Sara seems on the verge of throwing him in jail.

"It's fine Sara, some Fatui were trying to kidnap two children from Konda village, so we stepped in. Honestly Heizou did most of the fighting and is the real wounded one."

You smile and finish with an almost proud laugh. "It was impressive how Heizou had me fooled this entire time. I'm not mad at all so don't worry Sara. But thank you for being so worried."

You softly hold Sara's hands and give a grateful squeeze before pulling away. You step past her to talk to the inspector. This was gonna be a nightmare. You don't see the competitive glare Heizou and Sara give each other.

As you are denied exit permission due to your lack of identification, Sara and Heizou step in to help you at the same time. After a few minutes of Sara and Heizou vouching for you as third-party authorizers, you hand over the fan.

That seemed to be enough proof for them to hand you a stack of papers to fill out. You moved the monstrous number of papers to a crate. Paperwork that you had to touch to read before filling out, what a joy.

"I'll be leaving first. The Shogun requires my presence for an important meeting. Shikanoin, I expect you to be at headquarters to finish all the new paperwork you earned after pulling the stunt you did. And Y/N please stay safe on your journey, may the creator guide you."

"Thank you, Sara, good luck at the meeting! Oh, and please tell the Arrataki Gang goodbye for me too!"

Serious as always, she nods her head before leaving. Heizou moves to stand beside you as you start tracing the words to become readable.

"Why are you touching the letters? You didn't recognize or read the words on the temple so how does touching it help?"

"To put it simply I can read the words easier after I touch them. But shouldn't you be on your way too? Don't think I've forgotten how beat up you are. Go see a professional before every medical building closes!"

"Man alive, are you trying to get rid of me so soon? Why I thought we bonded so well over our time together."

You know he's just playing and teasing but the answer you give is sincere.

"I did, I had a lot of fun. Despite how annoying you were at times, I really enjoyed playing around with all the questions and answers. But I would rather suffer through all this paperwork alone then let you stay with me as hurt as you are. So do us both a favor and see a doctor."

His eyes widen for a split second before settling into something calmer and sweeter. Have you truly bonded with him enough for him to let such a pure expression show?

"Since you were so honest with me, I'll go now."

You smile gratefully and are about to voice your goodbye before he pulls you close to him. You stand in a stupor as his chest presses against yours. His whisper is low and earnest.

"It was a pleasure to meet you Y/N. I eagerly await your next visit to Inazuma."

He releases you before walking away smoothly. Robotically you go back to the paperwork and fill it out. It's probably best to not take his words as anything deeper than friendly. Heizou has always been a flirty character, you were nothing special to him… right?

The stars are out by the time the paperwork is handed in and you have permission to leave. Not wanting to look at the identification card they gave you, you stuff it into your bag for later use.

The Alcor is huge, there is only one crew member awake on the deck and you climb the ramp to speak to him.

"Hello, my name is Y/N, this is the Alcor correct? Here is the fan I was told to show as my ticket." You give the fan to him as he stares at it tiredly.

"I never really expected someone to actually bring it at one point. You must be Lord Kamisato's guest of choice. Come in and enter the doors on the right. The voyage itself is 15 hours but taking into account other things, the trip will take a whole day. Go get some rest."

He gives you back the fan, and you nod in thanks. As you walk past him to the right side, a voice calls out to you from the docks. Curiously you go the railing and look down to see Yae there.

You frown in confusion at her appearance. She must have arrived after you put in the paperwork. Surely, she overhears what Heizou said. Even so, the sight of the sly kitsune makes you automatically stressed.

"Catch." Is your only warning before a small box is thrown towards you. Catching it swiftly, you open it to see a mask inside it. It's a gold accented fox mask specifically designed to only cover the top of your face. The shine and lack of marks make it clear how new and expensive it is.

"An apology for bringing up an uncomfortable subject to you in our conversation. The war has affected many people but it's those in your position that suffered in ways others have not. I hope that whenever you come back to Inazuma, you'll have a lighter heart."

You close the box and smile at her with gratitude. It's a perfect mask for that creeping feeling of dread. This is now the second mask you've obtained from stealing. This mask could have been something different for someone who actually suffered due to the war.

Silently you wave at Yae before she leaves without any other words. You watch her form disappear around a corner as whispers asking, "Where is Captain Beidou?" and "Did she drag Kazuha to drink with her again?" roll off you. You can deal with that later.

The walk to an empty room below the deck is a blur. Your few belongings are on the table as you lay on the bed. The Anemoboxer that you killed rises up in your mind like a tide.

They were kidnapping children, that should be enough justification for their death. You don't feel like arguing that point. You also don't feel like thinking on how you'll deal with any future Fatui members either.

Instead, you ponder about the sickle you used that was encased in electro. If you activate other Statues of the Seven, could you unlock other elements?

Those were the only thoughts you allowed yourself to think about as you gradually fell asleep.

Well this took a while. If anything I blame the fight scene and Heizou being flirty. I did use my decently built Heizou and fought that exact squad of Fatui. He defeated two before dying (it was raining) meaning the outcome of that fight isn't off. I'm experimenting with different yandere types and how the interact. I'm sure most people would write Thoma and Gorou acting nice and trying to one up each other by being kinder while keeping their rivarly secrect. But I thought it was funnier if they were outright hostile and were very bad at hiding it. In case anyone is wondering, I will not be writing full on smut. I'm not sure how far I'll take it in terms of stuff like making out but it'll probably never get past a kiss or two. Maybe I'll change my mind but never smut. I'm far too embarrassed for that.

I never realized just how many characters I had to write until I put the tags. I don't want to know how many words it is but it's 13k. Which is honestly pretty good, I was expecting like 15-16k. I'm very glad that I split the chapter. With Fontaine coming close and the trailer out, I'll probably spend more time playing to make up the primogems needed. Maybe more readers will join with the new hype or players will read less due to the new updates idk.

Taglist: @vvyeislazzy, @nikqi, @the-dumber-scaramouche, @etherisy, @yourlocalstranger123, @ra404, @iruiji, @goldenglow149, @haru-tofuu, @lsleepysimpl, @bebobeboben, @yuyuzi-ling, @amidst-the-tempest, @resident-cryptid, @mxd1zzy, @mochicurls21, @nervouseaglelover, @thedevioussmirk, @yumuramma, @kwqsla, @undecidingfate, @ehjane, @game-savvy, @akiramirae, @sielt, @fluffy-koalala, @formacoon, @sxftiebee, @khxii-i, @ursinaw, @chuuya-brainrot, @sweetbills, @kazuchaos, @snowfoxnix, @bluebelony, @conspicuous-mayonnaise, @pencil-of-ashes, @ghostlyintervention, @taiformaifo, @sielt

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taylor-titmouse · 5 months

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2023 Book Retrospective

it's pretty much the end of the year, and i've never done this before, but i wanted to take a look at what i managed to do in 2023 and share some of my thoughts on it! i published five novellas this year (though i didn't actually write one of them) plus the public release of the demo and first huge update to You're A Mage on Monsterfuck Mountain. that's a lot!

so let's dig into all that. this will contain some spoilers for the books, because it's hard to talk about them without talking about what's in 'em, so maybe check out my itchio first and grab anything you missed! (but also.... perhaps wait until this weekend before you buy anything. shh.)

You're A Mage on Monsterfuck Mountain, released in March

TECHNICALLY, the demo was finished and available on patreon around the end of last year, and didn't become public until I'd finished the garden update, which i did finish this year. and what a massive fuckin THING that was. 60k words! 50 illustrations!! the biggest thing i ever put out and technically finished, and the beginning of a move to being less afraid of writing "weird" sex. there was so much bee sex in it. arguably too much bee sex in it. which i'd left entirely til last to do which meant i was writing nothing but bee sex for weeks.

this was the first time i let myself really indulge in writing dubcon for the bad endings, and it was a lot of fun. very often it was more interesting than the deliberately horny routes, because it meant writing a way to be put in the situation, and also making it hot every time. i'm very much of the philosophy with dubcon that even if the situation wasn't Ideal for the character, they're still going to get good sex out of it. i believe i put it at another point as, i'm here to write the pleasure of helplessness, not suffering. to that point, the dubcon endings for the armor, the dryad, and the queen bee were my favorite bits from this.

the fact i never got a second update out this year is a big regret. i finished a bunch of the routes for it, but ultimately i wanted to have things i could release! shortly after publishing the demo and update, i officially put my webcomic on hiatus so i could focus more on my graphic novel, and also spend more time on my writing. having that extra time is probably the only reason i was able to write as much as i did this year, and i didn't want to spend it toiling away on a serial project i couldn't release for months at a time.

which leads us to the release of my first novella of the year...

House of the Risen King, released in April

now this is when i truly said "i'm just going to write what i think is hot and interesting and not worry about how it's perceived!!" and went whole hog on exhibitionism and monster dubcon cult horror. house was mostly inspired by the ending of Hereditary, and was originally going to be more poltergiesty and played more straight, with vee being harangued by a bunch of horny ghost-demons and nothing more sinister than that. but i've had cult shit percolating at the back of my brain forever, and i wanted to play with ideas i'd first developed in shadow in the shelves with rituals and shadows, so here we are! the scene of hettie fingering vee in the bathtub while vee's god-fucked out of her mind is my favorite.

fun fact, the original seed for this book was actually going to feature max and mortis, my photographer/model couple (that link goes to cohost because i wasn't posting here yet when i was drawing them the most). the idea was they'd go do an urban exploration shoot and mortis would start getting fucked by a ghost while max filmed it, but the more time i spent with those characters the less i wanted to involve the supernatural. which meant i never wrote their book, and had to make a new character to do the idea. and then it wasn't even that idea anymore.

that's writing, folks

Roger Crenshaw: The Dogs at Duskfall, released in June

... which makes it ironic that the next book is one i didn't even write! r/l monroe @mortalityplays has been my friend for years, and was my editor for a long time (until he got a REAL JOB and didn't have TIME to edit anymore. sobs, cries, kicks a stone and walks into the distance). he's also always been an incredible writer, and for my birthday this year i asked him to write me something. i asked with the expectation of a little short story about our old tabletop RP characters, or a fanfic scene for one of my books he'd edited.

and then he wrote me 20,000+ words digging into the character of roger crenshaw and who he is that perfectly summed him up and tied all his stories together, such that i don't think i ever need to write another one. he did it, he wrote the perfect ending to roger. AND he did it using my favorite of his ocs from our tabletop campaign, AND there's some really hot and sweet smut in it. AND HE DID IT IN LIKE TWO WEEKS.

i loved it so much that i asked if i could illustrate and publish it as an official novella, and to my delight he agreed, and it was so so nice to collaborate with him on it. even if it meant beating our heads against the wall for 30 minutes about the placement of certain images on the page.

this was a great tragedy. i'd drawn the vagina one first, but an image earlier in the book had to be moved, which affected the placement of everything else. the vagina image had been perfectly at the start of a new page, and then suddenly it wasn't. so i had to do the penis one instead for better placement. tragic!!!

it's hard to pick a favorite scene in something written entirely, lovingly for you. how can i choose between the characters' pitch perfect semantic arguments on the nature of folk lore, the millenium princess-ass memory hopping, or the really really hot smut? i can't. i love it all. thank you r/l for being so good at what you do and writing this for me, i'll treasure it always.

The Dragon Double Feature, released in May

apparently this came out in may, and not july. i don't know why i've been convinced this came out in july. oh well i can't be bothered to insert it on top of the roger one.

anyway. THIS book. this book exists because i believe at the time i was a bit blocked, and wanted to just write SOMETHING. for a long time i've had the idea of a dragon wrecking a princess' wedding and fucking her in front of the congregation just sitting in my back pocket. it was the 'i know i could just slam this out if i wanted. i don't have to care about it it's just sex and then it's done' fallback idea, and i finally did it!

and then it was too short. i don't like the idea of publishing anything less than 10k words for full price, so i was like. okay. alright. i've always thought fucking an eastern dragon would be hot and have this other idea i was going to use for roger (back when i had an idea for every monster possible for roger), let's just write that. kenta is only kenta because i took a poll for what body type i should pair with a dragon (he was 'big boy', i think the other options were twink, older woman, and average woman). and i was also Really into the movie inu-oh at the time, which is probably obvious with kenta being a blind musician, lol.

the musician and the waterfall was tougher to write because i didn't have a clear vision of how it should end or even how they should fuck (the mechanics of fucking long noodle dragon have challenged me for years) but i'm ultimately pleased with it. it would have been a long time since i wrote something sincerely romantic, and it was nice to go back to it. i'm a HUGE romantic at heart.

both stories are pretty much one extended scene so it's hard to pick a favorite moment from them, but i will say i'm very pleased with how i approached writing the musician and the waterfall, specifically in the challenge i set myself to never use visual description kenta couldn't reasonably guess. writing from the POV of a blind man made me focus in on different senses and ways to describe them.

this book is also, as of right now, my best seller. which is great! i love that for me.

The Dragon Double Feature 2, released in July

okay i guess THIS one released in july.

anyway i got stricken with the curse with this one. a lot of people wanted me to write a sequel, but i wasn't going to. and every time i say i'm not going to do something, i end up doing it. it's so annoying. this one only happened because i wanted to write a SHORT! a SHORT extra for patreon describing kenta and wakatake's first time having sex as humans.

and then i wrote too much preamble describing their time on the beach. and then i got emotionally invested in unpacking their actual relationship, and also added a third character with mrs arakawa, and had to bring it all together into a story that was coherent and had something to say about the way they loved and ALSO ended in a THREESOME because WHATS THE POINT OF INTRODUCING A THIRD CHARACTER if they aren't all going to FUCK TOGETHER!!

it was tough. but i'm really, really happy with it in the end, and think it's one of the best things i've ever written. my favorite scene is definitely them playing with the hermit crab on the beach. metaphors babie.

the gundrid/eveline story is fine too. lmao. i NEVER PLANNED TO WRITE ANOTHER WITH THEM!! i only did it because the idea of publishing a sequel to a story from a double feature without writing a sequel to the other half of the feature was insane. and now eveline and gundrid are some of my most beloved characters, to the point of writing another book featuring them...

The Tenebrous Tower, released November

yet another book i'm pretty sure i was like 'i don't need to write this. this character doesn't work for a story on his own, what am i ever gonna do with him' and then i dumped a bunch of fantasy characters into a jar with him and suddenly i had a story. I ONLY MADE ROMICK BECAUSE I WANTED TO DRAW FUCKED UP WIZARD PORN AND MY ONLY OTHER OPTION WAS A GRANDPA!!!

anyway i started writing it as something to do on vacation, and it was just gonna be a bunch of dungeon bdsm vignettes until i hit on a throughline and suddenly i had a story and an emotional arc and damn i did it again. i did it again. i have a book.

i was expecting this one not to do very well because it had multiple prerequisites, but because i am a master of my craft i made sure to write it so you didn't need to read those. and then people read it without reading those. so it worked out anyway and now it's done just about as well as dragons 2. the people love romick, but they especially love the idea of him being destroyed. maybe someday. maybe someday. (except on patreon, where it's already happened)

the final vignette with the doll is, of course my favorite. i think it was a lot of people's favorites.

............................................

and that's everything i published this year! honorable mention to my novel starbuster, which i'd written most of last year, then spent all of october this year revising with the intent of finishing it, only to run out of steam by the time i was done revising it. so it's exactly where i left it last year. just better written. god it would be nice to finish that fuckin thing next year.

my goals for 2024 are, of course: release more books!! i have a big project i've been working on illustrating for the past month that i'd like to release in january, and i've also been working on a spin-off one-shot with mrs arakawa and an oni. i think this coming year i want to Try to blast through some of the one-off ideas i developed this year so they'll quit banging cowbells in my brain. like the sleeping garden. it makes me insane i never actually wrote the sleeping garden.

anyway if you actually made it to the end of this, thank you!! if you've bought all of these books, double thank you!!! i've been able to pay my rent and expenses just with my adult work this year, and it's been amazing and fun and super fulfilling. thank you for supporting me in 2023, here's to a horny 2024!!

#tt talks writing #taylor titmouse

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hischierswhore · 1 year

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actress!y/n saying in a interview that she would love to become a WAG and mason commenting that he’d be more than happy to fulfill her wish (they are already rumoring spreading about them being an item) 😮‍💨

fueling the fire

pairing: Mason Mount x Reader

TW: none

A/N: i didn't know how to end this so im sorry if its shitty

"We know you're a huge football fan, but would you ever like to become a WAG?" The interviewer asked as you sat still in your chair, trying not to mess with the lie detector wires that were currently attached to you.

"I'd honestly love it. I've hung out with a few of the Chelsea boys, and they're all super sweet, and extremely attractive might I add" You giggled as you answered the question.

The interviewer looked at Judd, the man monitoring the test, and asked if you were lying or not, to which he confirmed that you were telling the truth.

"So you're admitting to hanging out with this man?" The interviewer slides a photo of Mason Mount in-front of you, causing you to let out a laugh.

"Yeah, we've hung out a few times. He's hilarious and overall just a great guy"

"Would you ever consider being a WAG to one of the Chelsea players?"

"Uhm- I mean sure. Just depends on our chemistry" You shrugged.

"She's nervous" Judd spoke, which caused your head to snap in his direction.

"Would you say you have chemistry with that man?" The interviewer said as she pointed to the picture of Mason that was still sitting in-front of you.

" I'd say we do" You tried to answer short and simple going forward until the interview was over.

~ 3 weeks later ~

The Lie Detector Test video was published and in a matter of minutes everyone was seeing it. You were checking Twitter to see people saving snippets from the video, when all of a sudden you got a notification that you'd been tagged in a tweet from none other than Mason Mount.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

masonmount

yourusername I'd be more than happy to fulfill your wish of becoming a WAG

4,385 Retweets 296 Quote Tweets 52.7K Likes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The entire comment section of his tweet was in shambles, as there was already speculation of the pair of you being together. In reality, you considered each other best friends. You'd only met the boy a few weeks ago, and you both weren't ready for a relationship. But you both did enjoy a good prank, so to mess with both yours & Mason's fans, you replied to the tweet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

yourusername

masonmount Great, when's the date?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fans went crazy at your response. They were fully convinced that this was real. You immediately received a text from Mason after tweeting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mason: Prank?

You: Of course

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You both committed to the bit, acting like this on social media for weeks on end. During this time, you and Mason got closer and did end up becoming a couple. Fans thought you'd both been dating long before you actually started, but you wanted to keep that information to yourselves, wanting to be able to have something for yourselves at the end of the day.

#✎ natalie writes #mason mount #mason mount fluff #mason mount x reader #mason mount x y/n #mason mount x you #mason mount fanfic #mason mount imagine

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the-modern-typewriter · 5 days

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helloo just wanted to know your thoughts on the recent tik tok commentary on “booktok” about how literature is being “ruined because of spicy books” and authors who cater to tropes I definitely see both sides!

Caveat: I don't have tiktok. I don't spend a lot of time on bookstagram either. So while I'm vaguely aware of the discourse, assume I spend most of my time blissfully unaware of everything, under my rock, writing my own little things.

Spicy books:

As with everything, there is nuance to be had. I don't think there is anything wrong with spicy books. There is clearly an audience for them and it's great to have books that recognise this desire! Western society can be weirdly puritan about sex and anything that challenges that get points from me. I've enjoyed the spicy scenes myself when they happen to miraculously meet the very specific vibes I personally like.

However, I also don't think every book needs to or should be pressured to be spicy and I personally get annoyed when I feel like spice replaces adequate plot or character development (which is something I've come across a few times in the last few years). I don't say this in a 'every sex scene must only be there to develop plot/character' way! I say this in a, oh my god, why has the plot stopped for sex in every chapter instead way. In a 'you guys used to have interesting conversations! why are you doing this to me!?' way.

But, you know. I'm not typically the target audience for sex scenes. So I'd just not read another book by an author who did that and let other people enjoy it, if that's what they're looking for. I still feel that there are still plenty of other books in the world I can read.

Tropes:

Tropes have and always will be a tool in writing. It's not new that writers are using them, but I think it's just a trend at the moment to be particularly upfront about them (especially in the romance genre tbh). Specifically, I think this is a marketing trend not a writing trend.

(Does trad publishing like books that are easy to market? Obviously. It's a business.)

I don't inherently mind this, because book marketing is really hard and realistically a lot of people don't stop to engage with original content or long descriptions about original content. Especially not on social media. Tropes are an excellent shorthand for conveying information/vibes, and then people can get more information and decide for themselves if they want to engage with the story.

(In a way, to me this is like when people add 'it's queer!' when they make me a recommendation. Does it make me more likely to go and look at the thing? Yes. Is it the deciding factor on if I actually read/watch/like it. Nope. It's just a quick flag for me to consider it and make my own decision.)

Maybe there are people who are specifically just writing tropes without much more to it...but I haven't really seen it in the books I personally read. At least not any more than the usual.

Some great books I've read this year so far:

The Luminous Dead By Caitlin Starling

Our Wives Under the Sea by Julia Armfield

Rolling in the Deep by Mira Grant

(They are all horror to some degree...I've been on a kick.)

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thebibliosphere · 7 months

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What are your thoughts on authors writing and posting fanfiction of their own work? Do you think being self published vs traditionally published makes a difference? I tried searching around about the topic before but found nothing conclusive, other than the statement, "if you're the owner of the work, you might as well make more money off of it," which doesn't sit right with me.

I mean, I'm quite (in)famously writing an AU fic of my own work (Sugar Vladdy) purely for fun and because Tumblr has a unique ability to pilot my lack of impulse control like the ADHD version of Ratatouille.

Numerous people have told me they'd buy Sugar Vladdy if I ever decided to make it into a proper book. Frankly, I'm not interested in that because my motives for writing Hunger Pangs vs. Sugar Vladdy were different.

Writing for profit vs writing for fandom occupy different spaces in my brain. They scratch different itches. Yes, I'm playing around with the same characters. But I'm sort of just treating it like enrichment in my enclosure. It lets my brain throw around all the ideas that wouldn't work for those characters within the canon universe but still likes to go, "Oh, but what if..."

Honestly. No idea how much of that is my ADHD or what, but that's the only way I can explain it. They're the same, but they're not. They're fun in different ways. And I can get away with it because I'm self-pub. I haven't sold the rights to anyone. The world and characters are mine. I can put my blorbos into situations if I want to.

Now, if I were trad-pub, there would probably be a lot of restrictions about what I can and cannot do surrounding my own characters because I've sold the rights for X amount of time. I couldn't just give things away. It might be considered a breach of contract if I did. It'd definitely be something I'd need to run by an agent first just to make sure.

As for not liking the "might as well make money off it" mindset, as a literal struggling writer who lives paycheck to paycheck, I'm not going to judge anyone who keeps their official work as for profit only. People deserve to be paid for their labor. If they/we want to create stuff away for free, that's up to us.

Would I personally find it stifling and joy-killing to only ever write for profit? Yes. But that's a me thing. Not a universal thing.

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veliseraptor · 11 days

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April Reading Recap

Stars of Chaos vol. 2 by Priest. I'm not quite grabbed by this one yet. I'm not not enjoying it, but the main relationship doesn't quite have me compelled, and the politics aren't quite sharp enough to get me either. I'm not totally sure I'll keep buying the published volumes, at least not at this time, and just read the rest online to see how I end up feeling about it as a whole before making the financial commitment.

Medea by Eilish Quin. Listen, I'm a Medea apologist, but I'm a Medea apologist who is very much of the "she absolutely did all the awful things she's accused of and she is valid" and the author here is going "she did all the awful things she's accused of but it's not as bad as you thought it was because she didn't mean it!" and I'm just. I'm not mad, just disappointed (again). I was so hoping for a book that would do something interesting with a Medea retelling but I probably should've known better than to think it'd be this one. Why, you may ask, do I keep reading myth retellings about my problematic faves when all I do is complain about them? Hope springs eternal, I guess.

She Who Became the Sun and He Who Drowned the World by Shelley Parker-Chan. Exceptional. Might be my favorite books I read in April. I'd already read She Who Became the Sun back when it was first published and knew I'd enjoyed it (was rereading to refresh my memory for the sequel), but I felt like I enjoyed it more the second time around, and I might've liked He Who Drowned the World even more than its predecessor. If you're looking for works of just-barely fantasy with delightfully fucked up queer characters, come get 'em here. I won't say most of them are happy (they're not) or that things end well (they don't), but boy is it good reading.

The Death of Jane Lawrence by Caitlin Starling. Decent horror but not particularly outstanding, in my opinion. I liked The Luminous Dead more.

Untethered Sky by Fonda Lee. I continue to struggle with novellas. This was a perfectly good novella but it felt like it could've been a stronger short story, which I guess is better than the other way I usually come out of novellas, which is "this was a fine novella but it should've been a novel."

The Mountain in the Sea by Ray Nayler. I really liked this. It has more of a thriller-ish edge than I expected, but for all that I think it's a thoughtful book with some interesting things to say, and I feel like it's one I want more people to read so I can talk to them about it. It's set in a sort-of spooky, near-future dystopia, but a lot of it is about, like, the nature of thought and consciousness. Anyway, I found myself compelled.

Islands of Abandonment: Nation Rebounding in the Post-Human Landscape by Cal Flyn. I found myself reading this thinking a lot about The World Without Us, a book I read many years ago and would kind of like to reread, and which I think I liked more than this (at least in my memory). I was hoping for more analysis than I got from this book, which was beautifully written but more nature/travel writing than science. One thing I did appreciate was the attention paid to the human cost of the "abandoned" places examined in this book - the pain that abandonment often signifies, and the trauma it indicates, in spite of the beauty that may come after.

Emperor of Rome: Ruling the Ancient Roman World by Mary Beard. I really liked the way that Beard chose to do this one - namely, taking it by theme rather than by emperor, and breaking down different areas of the emperor's life over time rather than trying to tell a linear narrative. It also let her do some of the better "skeptical" reading of sources that I've read in a popular book on ancient history, where she was actually digging into the "rather than what this says about what this person may or may not have actually done, what does it say about expectations, beliefs, and tropes that people had" kind of reading. And after some of the other popular histories of Rome I've read, thank god for that.

Metamorphoses by Ovid, trans. Stephanie McCarter. Continuing on with my "reading new translations (by women!) of classical epics" run (started with The Odyssey, The Iliad is on my list). It was fun to reread Ovid! As usual one of my favorite parts of this was reading the translator's note and introduction, and I wanted about 500% more of that through the text (tell me about the assonance you're preserving in the Latin!) but did get some of (thanks for the information on the penis/pubic hair puns!). Overall would recommend as a good translation of Ovid that very much does not flinch away from - and makes/keeps appropriately uncomfortable - the sexual assault.

Dark Rise by C.S. Pacat. Slightly more YA than I usually like, but I enjoyed it! I was a little :\ about it for a while, very much feeling the YA cliches of it all, but the late hour twist got me interested again, and I will be picking up the sequel. Did miss the full balls-to-the-wall iddy joy of Captive Prince, though, since I probably wouldn't have picked this book up without the author recognition.

Subversive Sequels in the Bible: How Biblical Stories Mine and Undermine Each Other by Judy Klitsner. I really liked this one, particularly for its commentary comparing and contrasting Eve, and the other women of Genesis, with later Biblical narratives. I don't know how much I buy all of her arguments when it comes to intentionality of all of the comparisons she's drawing, but it certainly makes interesting food for thought, and a good sampler for me of what literary-based Biblical scholarship can look like (and an indication that I'm interested in trying more of it).

Use of Weapons by Iain M. Banks. I read most of my way through this book continuing to really appreciate what Banks does with the Culture novels and planning to continue on reading the next one, but not enjoying this specific one as much as I did The Player of Games in particular, and then I got to the very end of it and went "hang on what the fuck???" but in a decidedly good way. And I'm still kind of thinking about That even though it's been a while, which I think is a positive. Anyway, I don't think I'd recommend this as a starting place for anyone to read the Culture novels, or as a must read, but it was on the upper end of a three star rating.

Juniper & Thorn by Ava Reid. I wanted this to be more gothic horror and less romance and it ended up being more romance and less gothic horror, was my feeling. Not necessarily the book's fault, but if anyone else is eyeing it wondering...now you know.

A Deadly Education by Naomi Novik. I really enjoyed this one! I was kind of skeptical going in - I'm not a big magic school person, as a rule, and the more I feel like something is hyped to me the more I tend to drag my heels about it - but Naomi Novik is really good at what she does and she clearly had a lot of fun here. It's tropey for sure, but I enjoy the narrative voice (very important, in a first person narration), and the action moves along with what I felt was pretty good momentum. The other thing I was worried about - that it'd feel too much like this was just ~commentary on/against Harry Potter~ without saying anything for itself - didn't materialize for me. I'm looking forward to reading the next ones.

The Monster Theory Reader ed. by Jeffrey Andrew Weinstock. I'm so rusty on my academic/theory reading and I felt it reading this collection, some of which was definitely better than others. Kristeva's essay on abjection was particularly rough as far as "I'm reading words and I know all the words but something about the order they're going in is just not making sense to me." Overall...it was a decent primer? There were a few very interesting essays in there; my favorite might've been the one on tanuki in modernizing Japan's folklore, but there were a couple on "monstrous" bodies that made me wish I had someone to discuss them with. That's probably my main problem reading academic works these days: I want a seminar to dissect them afterwards and I just don't have that.

The Sabbath: Its Meaning for Modern Man by Abraham Joshua Heschel. I'm trying to read something Jewish on Shabbat now and finally getting around to reading some Heschel after years of meaning to. I thought "oh, I'll start easy with something nice and short" - yeah, no, Heschel's got a very particular style of writing and there's a lot of theological depth packed into a very short volume. I'm looking forward to reading The Prophets, though.

The Husky and His White Cat Shizun vol. 5 by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou. I think we're juuuuust about caught up now with the official translation to where I started reading the machine translation, so I'm very excited for (a) things I don't remember as well (b) reading it not in machine translation. Also looking forward to everything about what happened with Nangong Liu and Nangong Xu making more sense this time around, on account of not reading it machine translated, because I didn't follow it so well on my first read and I feel like I'm already doing better. (Though that could also be because it's a reread, no matter how different an experience of one.) Still feel real bad for Ye Wangxi, on so many levels. Mark that one down for 'characters I'd love to know more about what they're thinking.'

The Water Outlaws by S.L. Huang. I really enjoyed S.L. Huang's other work with the Cas Russell series, and I liked this book a little less than those. It felt like an almost winner, for me. Certainly I read through it quickly enough, and I can say I enjoyed it, but I'm not sure I'd give it an enthusiastic recommendation. It falls somewhere in the middle between "a fun action/adventure story" and "something I can sink my teeth into" in a way that didn't quite satisfy either itch. Still, it did make me curious about the source material, which is one of the Chinese classics (Water Margin) and I might go and find a place to read that, if I can; if I'd had that background going in I wonder if my experience of this work would've been more edifying.

I'm currently rereading A Memory Called Empire so I can (finally) read the sequel (A Desolation Called Peace); I also checked out from the library the next two Scholomance books so I'll be reading those. I'm going to try to throw some nonfiction somewhere in there (maybe The Genius of Birds by Jennifer Ackerman, which I also have out from the library, but maybe something else), but I've still got the sequel to The First Sister sitting on my shelf (also from the library).

Outside of that I've got no big reading plans - I'm working my way through some of the unreads on my own shelf (despite what it may look like, about the library books) and eyeing The Doors of Eden by Adrian Tchaikovsky or a reread of Foundryside by Robert Jackson Bennett so I can continue that series.

#long post for ts #reading recaps #sometimes i read things #sometimes i wonder if i should have more like. summary information on what books are about #but i am lazy and also that's not really the point #important text posts

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ninjakk · 1 year

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Hi..

As much as I wanted to love the novel (original version), that r*pe jokes author threw in that extra chapter really put me off. She's so good creating the plots in her stories, but why did she has to put that jokes in? She was so insensitive about that issue.

I want to know your thoughts about this :)

Hi anon,

I'm sorry to hear you've been put off the novel, but each to their own.

So, you see the thing is it's not a joke to WWX and LWJ, they are just roleplaying to their kink. There are hints throughout the novel that WWX is not opposed to this forceful behaviour and he even makes a 'joke' about such things back when they are trapped in the Xuanwu's cave.

I think one thing that a lot of people forget is that this was a web novel on a site with author's notes and tags. So if the noncon, or in this case CNC (consensual nonconsensual), was an issue for readers, they might have been able to see this and not read on. It is also something often found in BL and she was targeting a specific audience who would mostly be aware of such things possibly appearing in her chapters anyway. Because of this, I don't think MXTX was being insensitive about such topics.

In fact, I think due to noncon and dubcon being a common trope in the BL genre, MXTX has (as she so often does) turned this trope on its head and actually made it something I would consider healthy. LWJ holds himself back from doing anything without WWX's consent (bar his momentary laps with the kiss, which he feels terrible about afterwards) and consent is actually a running theme throughout the novel. LWJ refuses to do anything WWX doesn't want - to the point he does not take him back to the Cloud Recesses in his first life. It only becomes CNC because WWX wants and encourages it at the end of the novel. Even the apparent dubcon bath scene where WWX thinks he's taken advantage of LWJ, was actually consensual because LWJ had sobered up before this point and it's subtly shown as such by LWJ's speech pattern changing from childish to a more forceful tone. Obviously LWJ's dream is technically noncon and was quite a shock to some, but this was a dream and you can't control dreams. I won't go into the dream scene because there is already a lot of meta on this and I'd just be repeating!

Overall, CNC is a part of WXs shared kinks and I actually found it refreshing to see it handled quite respectfully, in the sense of it being a kink that can have a bit of a bad rep. MXTX showed her readers how a loving couple can have such a kink, yet be so tender and sweet as well.

Naturally I understand why this might make some readers uncomfortable, especially if they are unaware such things are in a novel and it may be triggering. There is an argument here for some sort of warning being included for such content that may pose as a possible trigger and something indicating as such somewhere on the novel cover - as it does not have any on the official volumes I have. Especially considering some readers may have come from the CQL or donghua and aren't aware of such things being present.

As such, I would say that if anyone handled such things insensitively, it would be the publishing companies, not MXTX - as she is just an author catering towards a certain audience and genre. It is the publishing company's responsibility and choice to safeguard the general public from reading something that may be triggering, but most publishing companies do not do this because they fear it may impair sales. There is also a huge argument about adding warnings being a form of censorship and trigger warnings actually doing more harm than good, so it seems to be a very difficult line to tread.

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #wangxian #wei wuxian #lan wangji #mdzs novel #anon ask #answered ask

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troius · 2 months

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Well, actually this is how it ends. Not really sure what he was going for here. Although I guess it works as a stealth advertisement for Bleach: Brave Souls, which carried the torch as the most prominent ongoing Bleach product until the return of the anime.

Anyways, thank you all for following along with me. I started this blog back in 2021 because I'd fallen back in love with this thing I was super into as a teenager, and needed to express my feelings to somebody. Y'all have been an absolutely wonderful audience, and I hope I've been the same to you, because wow, you folks are talented! You write, and you draw, and you think, and more than anything else you're a generally delightful bunch.

Rough thoughts on the ending are here, thoughts on the series as a whole here, and my future plans for this blog here. I will probably try to work the first two of those into short essays, which I'll publish on here in the near future. I'll also read and review We Do Knot Always Love You and Can't Fear Your Own World, like I did for the earlier light novels.

Anyways, thank you all again. It's been a delight and a pleasure, and while this journey has ended, I don't plan on leaving anytime soon.