#I think this is one of the best pictures I’ve ever taken lol

[fillemoderne]

Farmers market goods

#vegan #farmers market #fruits and vegetables #I think this is one of the best pictures I’ve ever taken lol

[dollyhao]

succubus!reader x nerdy!ellie

summary: ellie is desperate to lose her virginity that has been looming over her her whole college career.

toni’s note: i made it guys! i promised this back in october and it’s the end of january… but it’s here.

cw: this is pure smut, no plot at all lol. 1.8k words

༊*·˚

ellie has not a single regret about what she’s about to do. ellie is in college and is still a virgin, at this point she didn’t think she’d ever lose her virginity. until one of her friends joked that she should summon a sex demon, that it was ‘the only way she’d get laid’. it wasn’t meant to be taken seriously, but desperation makes people do crazy things.

she read in an old book she found in the library about one in particular, the book had a picture of you drawn in and ellie thought you were absolutely gorgeous and perfect for her. what was the worst that could happen?

ellie lights the candles around the circle she made on her bedroom floor. she chanted your name 5 times like the book told her, then after 20 seconds the candles all blew out and a gust of purple smoke floats in the air. you pop out the smoke looking even more perfect than the book describes.

“who dares summons me?” you say in this slow sensual voice that ellie feels course through her body. you look around the room you were summoned in before your eyes rest on a short girl with black rimmed glasses on her face. ellie is looking at you with those pretty green puppy eyes, mouthed formed into an o shape.

“a girl? well thats new,” you walk closer to ellie sizing her up. “your cute… tell me what you want from me.” “i-i,” ellie is literally speechless. shes staring up at you, the lady demon whos probably gonna take her virginity. you have long horns on your head and a cute skinny tail, but the best part is that your completely naked. breast out in the open, nipples standing at attention, nothing covering your cunt and it’s just begging for ellie to drop to her knees to taste you.

“did you call me here to waste my time?” you ask her putting your hands on your hips with a quirked brow. “no no! i-i want you to take my virginity.” ellie says playing with her fingers. you hum, “ok ill do it. but you have to sign a contract-” “yes yes! anything!” you spawn a paper out of thin air, “dont you wanna know what your agreeing to?” but by the time you finish your sentence ellie has already signed the paper.

after she is done signing, the paper disappears. “i wanna let you know i-i’ve never done this before. well i almost did in my fourth year of highschool but that was a missed opportunity-“ ellie’s nervous rambling was cut off by you running your hands over her shoulders and ripping her shirt open exposing a blue sports bra underneath. ellie gapes at you, suprised at the sudden intrusion. you push the ripped shirt off her shoulders. “do you wanna touch me?” you say voice softening seeing how nervous the poor girl is.

she nods vigorously trailing her hands up your tummy to your breast. “you can touch me however you want.” you say smirking at her. ellie feels like she can hear your voice inside her head, a slow sensual voice with a rasp that can only be described as wild and sexy. she feels a rush of arousal pulse through her as she pushes you to lay on her bed. your eyebrows shot up, you feel her start to kiss down your stomach swirling her tongue around your navel before her head dips between your legs.

you buck slightly when you feel her inexperienced tongue flicking all around your cunt. she takes your clit into her mouth rolling and flicking her tongue all around it (like they do in the videos she watched before the summoning). you can feel her breathing heavy against you. she pushes two experimental fingers into you feeling how wet and tight you were. you taste sweet like honey and something else addictive that ellie can’t name, ellie suspects its part of your demon powers.

you grab her hair squeezing your legs around her head trying to contain your moans, no human has ever made you feel so good. you might just… like this girl. she’s cute and gentle. and she looks at you like your aphrodite instead of a sex demon.

you feel yourself about to cum when you push her head from between your thighs. ellie is looking at you, chin covered in your juices looking pussy drunk with her glasses fogged up. “are you ok?” she asked you, looking genuinely concerned. you want to coo at her but instead you flip her over taking place in between her legs this time. you peer up at her with this look that looks like you want to devour her. you pull down her sweat pants and underwear licking your lips at her slick pussy.

you give her clit a sweet kiss before using your thumb to rub circles on it. ellies moans out loud when she feels your abnormally long tongue enter her. your tongue is reaching places her fingers couldnt possibly reach. she chants you name which only encourages you to move your thumb faster on her clit. ellie grabs your horns and pull before locking her ankles together keeping you still as she grinded on your tongue feeling the knot in her stomach ready to explode. you let out a groan as ellie tugs on your horns. “im so close.” she says before her body goes rigid.

you pull away from ellie, swallowing her essence, seeming to have had an energy boost. “is there anything else you wanna try?” you say rubbing up and down her legs. she nods getting off the bed grabbing a box from under it. in the box are sex toys but ellie pulls out a girthy purple strap. “oh,” you say eyes widening, “you wanna use that on me?” you ask with that same sensual tone from the beginning. “yes.. please”

she puts the strap on before she feels you push her down on the bed straddling her. you hover over her dick grabbing it and running it up and down your slick cunt. “you want me to fuck you?” you say placing a hand on her chest still hovering over her. ellie nods her head grabbing your hips panting in anticipation, “yes please…” “ask nicely,” you say leaning down licking and biting her ear. “please fuck me. please.” ellie says bucking her hips. the tip of her dick pushes into you, you moan sitting completely on ellie’s cock.

you are bouncing and riding with no sign of slowing down. ellie is running her hands over your body, transfixed at the way your breast bounce as you ride her. when she sits up, she wraps her arms around your waist, holding you close to her as she kisses your neck and chest leaving marks.

you grab ellie’s face, tilting her head to the side so you can have access to her neck. you use your tongue to lick and suck marks into her neck until you get a little too excited and nick her neck drawing blood. ellie let’s out a groan followed by a guttural moan, completely dazed. you lick at her neck getting all the blood up before humming and planting a kiss on the mark.

ellie is gripping your ass meeting your thrust with her own desperate ones. “are you close?” ellie asked desperately, leaning to kiss you again. “very.” you coo out, kissing her using that long muscle of yours, twirling your tongue around hers.

you let go and ellie is staring in awe at the beautiful look you made while cumming. she lays back on the bed, exhausted and satisfied. when she feels your very sharp nails trail up her stomach and latch at her sports bra causing it to rip as if it was being cut by scissors. “more.” you whisper with a wide grin.

“what?” ellie asked wide eyed. “i want more. i think im going to keep you.” you whisper in her ear.

༊*·˚

I, Ellie Williams, am allowing succubus y/n to take on a human form and co habitat with me. I will fulfill her needs of sex so that she may stay by my side and use me for a long as she wills.

signed: ellie williams

#wlw #lesbian #ellie williams #the last of us #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams smut #loser ellie #ellie williams tlou2 #ellie x fem reader #ellie x reader

[dolldefiler]

This isn't the first ask I've sent you- you already know how much I love your writing! But would you ever consider writing more public sex scenarios?

Something like a girl getting fucked on a crowded subway train, with other passengers pressed up against her. It starts out subtle, with him trying to see how much he can get away with, but soon he's fucking her so good they both stop caring if anyone sees. Maybe no one does see- maybe one or two people notice and flush and look away- hell, maybe the whole subway car catches on and she's suddenly surrounded by people gasping and staring and taking photos, all while this guy's cock is just destroying her, with her eyes rolling back and drool dripping down her lips.

Maybe at that point he gives up all pretense of secrecy and just slams her against the wall or throws her over a chair, or rips off her clothes right where they're standing, while the other passengers scatter out of the way. She'll have to finish her commute in torn, ruined clothes, with cum all over her and a fucked-out expression that just won't go away. (can you tell I've thought about this more than I'd care to admit? i've had lots of long commutes, lol)

Anyway. No pressure to write something like that, since I know how busy you are. But if inspiration strikes, and you have time…well. I'd really appreciate it <3

Hello, hello, I've not done too much public scenarios but I wrote this based off your very wonderfully written ask. I hope I've not butchered it, and thank you so much for the inspiration! I'll try to work on more pieces :)

C/W: Public sex, rape

Hello there, miss. Hush. Quiet now. You wouldn’t want them to see what I’m doing to you now, would you? You wouldn’t want the other passengers to see me molest your fat ass, would you? That’s a good girl. No, no, there’s no need to cry. Once I get my fill of your gorgeous fucking body, I’ll leave. You know me, don’t you? We’ve taken the same train for months now. Every morning I have to endure your perfect fuckdoll body passing by me without being able to touch it. Not today.

Shh, quiet now. God, was that moan? Don’t tell me you like some stranger slipping his hands up your blouse to fondle your tits? Does your boyfriend not feel up your tits as well as I do? Mhm? Yeah, it is. Yeah, that’s my cock. Do you like it? Do you like my big, hard cock pressed up against you? If I slipped it in you right now, do you think the guy next to you would notice? God, do you think he fantasises about your slutty body as much as I did?

Shit… FUCK-, well I guess there’s no need to be quiet. Fuck, fuck, fuck, you feel so much better than I imagined. Your cunt’s gripping my dick like you’re a natural whore. God, look at that. Everyone’s looking at you. They’ve even- fuck yes- they’ve even got their phones out. Look! You’re going to be a pornstar now! 

Get off that seat. I’m going to fuck her on it. Let’s get you settled here… Shit, yes. Shit, your pussy’s a premium fucking fleshlight, isn’t it? God, you don’t need this blouse, do you? Let’s just tear it off you. God, look at those fucking tits swinging while I bounce you up and down my cock. What a lewd fucking sight it must be for our audience.

God yes, get on your knees. You look so pretty with those glazed eyes. Let’s finish them off with some thick cum. Shit, this is the best train journey I’ve had with you. Fuck yes, it’s coming. I’m CUMMING. Ugh, let’s paint your face with my cum.

Anyone want a picture? She's real cute like this, isn't she? Does anyone know where she works?

#public kink #r@pe fantasy #rough kink #rapekink #rapedoll #r@pe kink

[chelseeebe]

come pick me up.

part one to do you think i have forgotten (about you)

summary: it had always been you and eddie. but one night and a whole lotta unexplored feelings leave you both reeling and you’re not sure if it ever really was you and eddie.

a/n: ermm this is so so long i’m so sorry already LOL i’ve had it in the drafts for so long but i reread it n rlly liked it so i wanna post hehe! side note: there are ZERO pictures of eddie not in that fuckin hellfire shirt D: i can’t have a grown man wearing that now …

loosely based off of the cook/freddie/effy storyline from skins uk if you’ve seen it you’ll know.,,, they’re like in their early twenties n it’s set sometime in the 90s ish tho it’s not rlly mentioned

no use of y/n! smut, 18+. this is more so stevexreader than eddie but they do have a relationship of sorts n it’s a lil’ complicated.

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ❤︎ ❤︎ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

the sound of a high pitched alarm screaming jolts you awake. still partially in last nights clothes, the grubby feel of makeup on your face. leg slung over eddie’s torso.

you groan, shoving his arm as he’s still very much asleep, ‘shut up,’ grimacing as the noise continues.

he mumbles something, wildly slapping his arm about to turn off the damn thing.

you run a hand over your face, remnants of your black eyeliner on your hand. that horrid taste in your mouth only found after a night of drinking. which seemed to be just about every night at the moment.

‘why’d you set an alarm, you freak?’ rolling over onto your stomach, perched on your elbows, watching as his eyes slowly open, obviously feeling as shit as you did.

‘i have- had class, you freak,’ he grumbles, looking up at you from the pillow, curly hair fanned out around him.

you scoff, ‘like you were gonna go,’ attempting to rub the rest of your mascara off, sure you looked similar to a wild raccoon.

he hums in response, shuffling under the covers to tangle his leg with your yours, ‘you gonna sort this out for me?’ referring to the obvious morning glory tenting the blanket.

‘you gonna ask nicely?’ you respond, snarling at his crudeness.

whatever he was about to say was interrupted with a knock at the door, ‘we’re coming in, you have five seconds to not be naked,’ robin’s voice echoes.

you look up as robin walks into the room, hand over her eyes until steve gives her a small nudge, indicating the coast is clear, ‘oh good-,’ she sniffs, ‘it smells like weed and sex in here, you’re fucking disgusting.’

‘thanks for reminding me,’ eddie leans over, retrieving the half-smoked spliff from last night and lighting the end.

steve’s eyes are firmly on yours, kinda sad and defeated. he had that same look on his face whenever you and eddie were together, which was often.

you’d sort of always had this.. thing with steve. encapsulated by his presence. there was always something unspoken between you and you were never sure if it was because he hated you or not. small glances and touches that seemed to linger just a bit too long.

you’d sorta taken his best friend from him at one point, coming between their friendship suddenly and with no warning.

steve was intrigued by you too. this mystical, unobtainable persona you presented to the world. something he couldn’t crack. just couldn’t quite understand it.

‘we’re getting breakfast, i was going to ask if you wanted to join but i assume that won’t be happening,’ she raises her eyebrows, noticing your severely hungover state.

they liked to party too, just clearly not as much as you and eddie. both of you had no understanding of when to call it a night, egging each other on til the point of no return.

‘i think we’ll give that a miss,’ eddie’s answers for the both of you. steve’s eyes immediately look down, suddenly interesting in the burn marks in eddie’s carpet.

you’d actually met steve first, on the first day of classes in freshmen year. you went over to a sheepish steve, who looked slightly scared, and obviously lost. offering him the directions to his room.

he’d smiled back, introducing himself to you on the way. appreciative of your kindness. you probably wouldn’t have helped if he didn’t look like that, but still, it was nice.

that’s when eddie had bounded over, all hair and denim. loudly taking over your conversation, introducing himself with a smirk, hand already creeping onto your lower back. that’s when steve had nodded towards him and informed you of their already established friendship.

you weren’t really sure when it became you and eddie. well, it wasn’t. not officially. god, you didn’t want official. he was fun to fuck and even better to party with. maybe the fact he dealt had been a factor in solidifying your strange relationship. maybe not.

robin rolls her eyes, ‘right, well you boring fucks can rot in bed all day, suit yourselves,’ ushering steve out of the door, slamming it behind her.

you blink, hating this awful, guilty feeling steve always left in your stomach. you’d tear a guy like him to shreds, maybe it was for the best.

whatever self-wallowing, steve-centric thoughts you had are interrupted when eddie’s arm snakes around your back, pulling you onto him.

‘i still need a little assistance here,’ he grins from beneath you, running his hand down your back, firmly grasping your exposed ass as you clamber on top properly.

you try your damn hardest to push the reflecting image of steve from your mind. though it doesn’t quite work until eddie’s calloused palm softly taps against your cheek, ‘anyone in there?’

you frown, returning the playful slap as you grind mindlessly against him, his fingers digging into the pliant skin of your ass.

‘you can do that again.’

-

eddie hadn’t shut up about his birthday for weeks. you’d all planned to go to the same bar you went to most weekends, except this time everyone had to go and he got to be centre of attention.

he’d been pissing you off all night. obviously far too drunk, jaw clenching from the copious amounts of shit he’d sniffed. hanging from your shoulder, speaking over you and splashing beer down your top as he slurred through his words.

‘i think we’re gonna head home,’ steve speaks up when you exit the bar, eddie already looking for the next place.

‘whaat? you’re fucking boring,’ he pokes a finger into steve’s chest, far too intoxicated, ‘you’re staying out, right?’ he looks over to jonathan, argyle and nancy who also shared an apartment not far from yours.

‘nah man.. it’s late, it’s been fun though,’ jonathan shrugs as nancy finds a taxi to take them home.

‘fuuuck you guys are really ditching me on my birthday? at least you won’t let me down,’ his arm hooks around your shoulder, yanking you into him.

you pull back, which wasn’t particularly hard in his state, ‘get off of me.. can i get a ride with you?’ looking over at steve, his hands cautiously poking out of his pockets.

he nods sheepishly as eddie practically erupts, ‘it’s my fucking birthday, and you fucking losers are going home?’ he’s screeching, throwing his arms around, making a royal scene in the middle of the street.

robin finds a cab willing to take the group of you home, calling you over to the yellow vehicle, ‘eddie let’s just go home, it’s late,’ attempting to coax him into going with you. you’d deal with his shit in the privacy of his bedroom.

he laughs, turning away from you and walking up the dimly lit street, ‘you.. you can get fucked,’ he slurs, disappearing into a nearby bar.

steve stands at the cab door, watching as you frown at eddie’s back. internally deciding whether to give in and follow him or to leave like you’d originally planned.

you let out an exasperated sigh, ‘he can go fuck himself,’ you spit as you slide into the back of the cab. steve follows, shutting the door behind him, flashing you a small cautious look as the cab pulls off.

-

you collapse onto the sofa the second you set foot in the apartment. completely at your wits end with eddie and his the way he spoke to you.

‘i’m going to bed,’ robin announces, slinking into her own room, leaving steve to awkwardly linger in the living room.

you didn’t want to worry about eddie. he was a grown man who could definitely handle his own. besides, why should you when he’d explicitly told you to fuck off?

steve clears his throat before taking the empty seat beside you, ‘he didn’t mean it.. it’s just drunk talking,’ he nods, attempting to reassure you.

it wasn’t as if you were really upset about it all. more so annoyed that you’d let him treat you that way. continually. over and over again.

whatever the fuck was going on between the two of you had started to wear thin. there were only so many times you could put up with his shit before it got tired.

eddie could be a horrible drunk. it wasn’t often but when that version of him came out you’d prefer to be far far from it. he was cruel with his words, venomous as they rolled off his tongue. then you’d get into a screaming match and then either end up hate-fucking or you’d just both never bring it up again.

‘no, he did,’ you sigh, kicking the shoes from your feet with a thud, ‘i don’t care.. really.’

‘right,’ he nods, not totally believing you, ‘y’wanna smoke?’

a small smile creeps onto your face as he reaches for the small black box eddie kept on the table, pulling out a small baggie of weed, something eddie definitely wouldn’t miss. he didn’t even need your reply, beginning to roll up.

-

perhaps you’d smoked a little too much, sputtering on the final toke of your second or third spliff before handing it back to steve. he sits on the other side, an awful lot closer than he’d been originally.

it was quiet, but comfortable. not awkward at all.

‘y’know..’ he speaks up, looking over at you, ‘actually.. nah,’ changing his mind almost immediately.

‘no.. what? what were you gonna say?’ you furrow your brows, vision hazy, the room full of grey smoke.

he sort of chuckles to himself, stubbing the end of the joint out in the glass ashtray before looking at you again, ‘it’s stupid,’ he warns.

‘even better.. tell me,’ you nod, encouraging him to go on.

he pauses for a moment, a tiny smile on his pink lips, ‘i always thought.. well, that you and me were gonna end up together, i thought you liked me for the longest time,’ shaking his head as he looks down.

your heart thuds. a mixture of your high and the unidentifiable emotion coursing through your veins. there was no questions to being with eddie. it was simple, sex and parties. no complicated feelings involved.

but within a second, steve had completely changed everything. a feeling you’d suppressed since your situationship with eddie had started. completely convinced that the odd relationship you had with steve was just because you were banging his best friend.

‘i didn’t.. i didn’t know you felt like that..’ you manage to get out quietly, watching as he slowly stands up, he doesn’t look at you once. too ashamed, embarrassed that he’d just admitted everything to you so easily.

‘well, now you know,’ he says quietly before disappearing into his room.

you linger on the couch for a moment. unsure of what to think of anything he’d just said. whether you should knock on his door and tell him you’d felt the same or just go off to your own room and wait for eddie to crawl in.

it wasn’t as if you felt nothing at all for eddie. you did, of course. but you didn’t love him. not the way you maybe should’ve. not the way you felt about steve, his gentle nature and soft caramel tinted eyes.

you stand from the couch, feet taking control as you walk to his door. a small slither of orange light peaking from underneath. raising your fist to knock but stopping, arguing with yourself. this couldn’t be a good idea.

before you can even convince yourself to knock, the door opens. steve stands on the other side, his own chest heaving as your eyes meet.

‘i-,’ he croaks, but you cut him off with your lips, pulling back just as quickly as you’d moved forwards.

you stare at him for a few moments, swallowing all the courage you’d just worked up.

‘..now you know,’ giving him a meek smile before walking back to your room. you lean back against the door, heart beating a million miles an hour.

-

a repetitive banging sound forces you awake in the morning. hissing as the sounds of an extremely dramatic moan get louder. high-pitched and obviously put on.

it takes a moment for you to realise just where the noise is coming from. eddie’s room backs onto yours. the headboard colliding with the wall at an alarming pace.

you stumble out of bed, throwing on an old dirty sweater and groggily making your way into the living room.

steve sits slumped over the table, looking particularly miserable this morning. despite what had happened last night. you wondered if he’d told robin who sat scowling at the door. steam practically coming out of her ears.

her eyes widen as you appear in the doorway, rubbing the residual sleep from your eyes, eyes flitting between your frame and the wooden door.

‘well shit, i was about to cuss you out,’ she remarks, astonished that you were stood in front of her.

steve’s whole face brightens when he realises you’re stood in front of him and not in the room making those god-awful, oscar worthy noises.

‘if that’s not you.. who the fuck is in there?’ robin gasps, now utterly bemused by the entire situation.

you shrug, choosing the seat opposite steve, making brief eye contact and flashing him a small smile. would he bring up last night? or was it never to be spoken about again?

relief is written all over his face. obviously under the impression that you’d made up with eddie at some point in the night. not once checking that you were in your room.

‘jesus christ i’m gonna kill him,’ robin fumes, sipping on a mug of coffee. her eyes are narrowed, attempting to set the room ablaze with her mind.

‘it won’t last long,’ you add, reaching over to steal a slice of steve’s buttered toast. he lets you, obviously. letting out a soft snort at your joke.

‘nothing is that good,’ robin shakes her head.

the noises quieten, a shrill giggle coming from the hallway as a scantily clad blonde appears in the doorway, closely followed by eddie, sporting a pair of boxers that hid absolutely nothing.

‘that way,’ he groans, guiding the smiling woman away towards the bathroom. his eyes momentarily meeting yours, total venom behind his glare.

robin jumps up, splashing coffee over the floor, ‘don’t you dare think about fucking in my bathroom,’ she warns, chasing after the odd couple.

you can hear an altercation as presumably eddie slams the bathroom door on robin, her fists pounding against the wood, hollering about her new bath mat.

steve glances at you, searching your face for any type of reaction. he doesn't find anything, instead you smile softly as robin re-enters the room, cursing at the bastard freak. she grabs her bag, slinging it onto her shoulder before stomping over to the door.

'i'm going out, let me know when he's done with his weird exhibitionist routine,' slamming the door as she exits, the poorly built walls shaking as she does.

there's a faint sound of running water, obviously coming from the bathroom, closely followed by a series of questionable grunts and groans. you choose to try and block it out, though engaging in conversation with steve at this very moment seemed almost too awkward.

'did you tell robin?' you pipe up, playing with your fingernails as you just about meet his gaze.

'uh.. yeah,' he grimaces slightly, 'i-i just thought.. well i thought that was you this morning, i was.. confused,' apologetic for his blunder.

you nod, 'i don't care.. i just wanna prepare for the inevitable grilling i'm gonna get,' chuckling in an attempt to ease the tension. it works as his lips curl into a small, playing with the discarded crusts on his plate.

the god-awful noises from the bathroom worsen and your eyes are pulled from steve, looking towards the cause. perhaps this was eddie's way of making you jealous. revenge for choosing to go home and not put up with his drunken assholery.

-

you’re sat tracing patterns into the velvet fabric of the sofa, practically shaking as you wait for steve to get back from campus.

he was your friend for fuck sake. why was this so nerve wracking? ask him to hang out, if he says no then so be it. you’ll deal with the awkwardness of your shared kiss alongside eddie’s misguided anger.

he’s later than you’d expected. becoming far too engrossed in the random soap opera on the tv when he does eventually get back. almost forgetting about what you’d got yourself so worked up over.

‘hey,’ waving his fingers as he comes in.

christ, he almost seemed more nervous than you were.

‘hey,’ not wanting to jump down his throat the second he walked in the door, turning the tv off and running your palms down the sofa.

‘spoken to eddie?’ he asks curiously, slinging his bag from his shoulder and slumping down next to you on the couch.

‘nah.. he went out this morning and hasn’t been back,’ you shrug, wishing that he wouldn’t have just bought that prick up.

he nods, looking down at his jeans, finding a loose thread to play with.

‘would yo-,’

‘d’ya wanna-,’

you both start at the same time, stopping to let him continue except he’d done the same thing. sitting in the silence for a brief moment.

you chuckle nervously, ‘sorry, what were you saying?’

‘i was just gonna ask if you wanted to.. maybe do something tonight? if- if you’re not busy,’ shrugging it off, trying his hardest to play it cool.

‘oh,’ laughing softly, the pair of you were like nervy teenagers, comical, ‘i was gonna ask you the same thing.. yeah i’d love to.’

steve grins, transported back to freshman year of high school, trying to find the gall to ask tammy thompson to the fucking movies. it all seemed so childish, innocent, the way you melted around each other.

‘okay.. i’ll get changed, give me five,’ he nods, leaping from the sofa and speeding off to his room.

you bite down onto your bottom lip, trying to contain your smile. kicking yourself for the adolescent excitement it gave you.

-

the bar was packed for a wednesday night, steve shouldering his way through the crowd with you following closely behind. not brave enough to cling onto his hand, wrapping your fingers around his forearm instead.

‘jesus christ,’ he exclaims when he finds a spot just about big enough for you both to stand. you were close. closer than you’d ever been. at least in public.

you hold onto the glass bottle he’d passed you from the bar, ‘d’ya wanna go somewhere else?’

‘what?’ he shouts, the music too loud to hear you properly.

you lean in closer, lips brushing against his ear, the feeling makes your heart pound, ‘you wanna go somewhere else?’

placing his hand on your arm so he could shout back, the mixture of his cologne and beer filling your nose. it was intoxicating, making your head giddy.

‘i’m good if you are,’ wisps of his hair sweeping against your cheek.

you nod, beaming up at him as you take a swig of the harsh beer. the crowd seemingly disappearing from around you as his eyes focus on you, his own smile overcoming his face.

-

okay, perhaps you’d had a little too much to drink. but a little dutch confidence never hurt anyone.

you’re definitely not complaining when you grab his hand on the way out of the bar, quickly intertwining your fingers as he weaves his way to the door. still as packed as when you’d got there.

you giggle as he trips over the step coming into the bar, sending you flying into his back as he regains his balance.

his hand is quick to steady you, resting on your waist. the street light illuminating the gleam of his eyes, slightly glossy from the multiple beers he’d sunk inside.

a drunk student roars past you, snapping you out of the moment, steve’s hand still lingering on your waist. something that would’ve never happened if he were sober.

‘shall we go home?’ you ask, not breaking from his gaze.

he nods, moving his hand to offer it out for you to grab. leading you over to an empty cab, leaning through the front window to talk to the driver.

the drive home is heavy with tension. sitting in silence as steve makes polite conversation with the driver, fingers still wrapped around yours. heart thumping as you near your street.

the apartment dark and silent when you get in, the only light coming from the old fairy lights robin had hung around the room. there’s no hesitation, your hands grabbing his cheeks, smashing your lips to his the second the front door closes.

it takes a moment for him to realise what was happening, hands quickly finding solace on the small of your back when it clicks properly. it’s greedy and desperate, tongue sliding into his mouth, wanting to touch every inch of him.

hands sliding down his chest, grabbing at the fabric, his leg slotting between yours, guiding you backwards. straight into the coffee table with a bang.

you spring apart, eyeing eddie’s room cautiously, saying a silent prayer and hoping he didn’t come out.

steve’s eager to resume, eyes hungry as they flit between eddie’s door and your face.

you pull back completely, taking your lip between your teeth and hooking your finger around his pinky, leading the way to his bedroom. it was the furthest away from eddie’s and made the most sense.

he shuts the door gently, flicking the small bedside lamp on, illuminating the obvious tent in his jeans. your mouth falling open at the sight of it, rubbing your thighs together to try and satiate the growing throbbing.

you’re quick to resume the kiss, moving on him swiftly, connecting your lips in a passionate kiss. he collapses backwards onto the bed, your body falling on top of his chest, hands caressing his cheeks.

the next moment you find yourself underneath steve, pressed into the mattress as he holds himself above you. eager hands finding the short hem of your skirt and sliding underneath on the soft skin of your thighs. you had never seen him move with such confidence before, normally a little shy in the way he carried himself.

his finger hooks into the waistband of your lacy panties, tugging them down to your thighs. his growing erection digging into your core with every movement. moaning into his mouth when his finger begins circling your sensitive clit. this had definitely killed any and all assumptions that he was a virgin.

it’s as if he had been waiting for this very moment for his entire life, sliding his fingers between your folds and into your already soaking hole, your mouth falling from his as your head rolls back onto the pillow.

‘oh my god,’ a breathy moan escaping from your lips as his fingers pump in and out, his other hand causing a dip in the pillow next to your head.

his fingers slip out of you and begin to unbuckle his belt, barely getting them down and around his legs before his cock springs up. bigger than you ever could’ve imagined, mouth hung open as your peer down between your bodies.

your shirt is pulled off over your head so quickly you weren’t sure if you had blinked, landing on the floor alongside his with a soft thunk.

you draw your eyes back up to meet his once more, ‘you’re sure?’ he reaffirms, pupils dilated, wetting his lips with his pink tongue.

‘so sure,’ nodding encouragingly underneath him, readjusting your legs to loosely wrap around his torso. you’d never been more sure of anything in your life.

he returns the nod, positioning himself at your sopping entrance and without breaking eye contact he slides in with a sharp intake of breath. you can’t contain the whimper that collects in your throat, the stretch of his cock taking you by surprise. the sting felt good, like he was always supposed to be there between your legs.

he’s still, waiting for your encouragement to move. you give it in the form of a squeeze on the back of his neck, clinging on to the skin as his hips move slowly. low, hungry grunts roll from his lips, the bed frame creaking in time with his thrusts.

‘fuck,’ you breathe out, taking your bottom lip between your teeth acutely aware that eddie was only a few doors away and could definitely hear the happenings in the room. even if you could manage to stifle yourself, the undeniable sounds of skin against skin would expose you.

‘is that- is that good?’ steve mumbles, moving slow but hitting deep, nudging against your soft spot, already hurtling you towards your orgasm.

‘jesus christ.. yes, yes,’ beginning to buck your hips back against him, feeling the familiar knot in your stomach. finger nails leaving crescent moon shapes in his skin as tears prick in your eyes.

steve groans as his heavy balls slap against the back of your thighs, pushing himself fully inside, ‘i’m not.. hmph.. not gonna last long,’ arm beginning to buckle with the weight of him.

you clench around him as your high topples over at his words, burying your face into the pillow next to you. unable to withhold the high pitched wail from leaving your mouth, barely managing to muffle the sound.

his rhythm falters, hips slamming into yours for the last few desperate pumps before he pulls himself out. thick ropes of cum spurting out and onto his hand. and the bed. and your thigh. crying out as his chest heaves above you.

‘holy shit,’ his arm gives way and he ends up next to you on the mattress, panting for air as he reaches for a dirty shirt on the floor, using the first thing he could find to clean off his hand.

you turn your head to face him, a lazy smile on your face as he offers the shirt out to you, mouthing a small sorry.

he throws it to the other side of the room, running a hand over his damp face, ‘i uh.. i last way longer normally,’ bashful and doubting his performance. it was only because it was you.

‘steve,’ you smile, grabbing his blanket to pull over your body, ‘don’t do that,’ seeing the shy boy from once before, you much preferred the steve from earlier.. confident and sure of himself.

‘yeah.. sorry,’ his lips curling into a soft smile, turning his body towards yours, arm snaking out to pull you closer, clammy palm resting on the small of your back.

you giggle quietly in response, settling in to your new position, sharing the blanket with him.

your eyes don’t leave each other’s as he begins to babble about something from the bar, clinging onto your skin as if you were somehow going to slip away.

-

you hadn’t even realised that you’d fallen asleep in steve’s room.

so when eddie comes in unannounced in the early morning, you thank your lucky stars that you’re facing the wall with steve’s body hiding yours. shoving your face into the pillow to hide yourself, hair sprawled around you, helping your case.

‘yo.. bro,’ he whispers, stepping into the room and over a pile of clothes, ‘good night?’ he cocks his eyebrow at steve as he turns around, glaring at the interruption.

‘uh.. yeah yeah,’ steve panics, realising what eddie had walked into and the chaos that’d ensue if he figured it out, his arm tightens around your waist, pulling you flush against his chest.

‘sounded like it,’ eddie chuckles, shaking his boot to rid it of the discarded shirt on the floor, ‘look, have you got ten bucks? i can give it back tomorrow,’ he bargains, smiling at steve.

‘yeah.. yeah, my wallet’s on the desk,’ steve nods towards the desk, adjusting himself to make sure he was covering you when eddie stomps over to the desk.

ten dollars was a worthy sacrifice to not have to deal with eddie’s temper tantrum in the morning. it wasn’t like he’d never find out. just not now.

‘thanks bro.. i’ll get it back to you tomorrow, hey,’ eddie rubs his stubbly face, ‘d’you know if dickhead’s in? i knocked but, uh.. no answer,’ quite obviously referring to you.

you have to resist the urge to sit up and cuss him out.

‘uhh.. no, no idea sorry,’ steve shakes his head apologetically, lying through his teeth.

‘alright well, have fun,’ wiggling his eyebrows as he exits, closing the door softly.

you exhale when the door clicks shut, though you stay in the same position, not entirely convinced he’s not stood outside the door listening.

‘don’t speak,’ you mouth to steve, who looks wearily at you until the front door closes and you fully turn to face him.

‘jesus christ,’ you breathe, ‘he doesn’t knock?’

‘usually he does.. i bet he wanted to see who was in here,’ his arm twitches, unsure of whether to keep clinging on to your waist or to remove it.

‘i mean,’ you shrug, ‘he’ll found out eventually, right?’ it was inevitable, especially as you were living together.

‘i s’pose.. you don’t care?’ taken aback by your nonchalance towards the situation.

‘not really.. i just don’t think he needs to know, not yet,’ you croak, he had literally just banged another chick practically right in front of you. any guilt you may have felt about the situation had disappeared.

‘yeah,’ he gives you a tired smile, nuzzling his head into the pillow, all soft and sweet.

‘i dunno about you but i’m going back to sleep, until at least lunch,’ your hand running along the curve of his bicep, mere inches away from each other.

he hums in response, his lingering arm pulling your waist closer, eyes drooping as sleep takes over.

-

you’re awoken again by the slam of the front door, robin leaving for work. letting steve know that everyone in the apartment could hear your late night activities.

steve grumbles, complaining about her heavy-handedness. you leer over at the alarm clock, wanting to get out of steve’s room before eddie gets back from work, making sure there were no possible chances of awkward questions this afternoon.

‘shit,’ you hiss, climbing over his still half-asleep body and grabbing whatever t-shirt you could find, pulling it on over your head, ‘eddie’s back in like five.. i’m gonna get out of here now, saves the aggro..,’ slipping into your discarded underwear.

‘right.. good idea,’ he mumbles, one arm folded underneath his pillow as he comes to fully.

you sprint out of there and into the kitchen, pouring a bowl of cereal when eddie strolls through the door, whistling some tune to himself. he glances at you before taking a seat at the cluttered dining table.

you don’t say a word, discarding your plan to sit at the table and instead tucking in to your cereal on the counter, pretending to read some flyer.

‘where were you last night?’ he asks, leaning back on the chair to get a full view of you, ‘i knocked on your door but..’ narrowing his eyes.

‘i was probably fuckin’ asleep,’ shoving another spoonful of cereal into your mouth, making brief eye contact with the man.

he squints, trying to figure out why that shirt was so fucking familiar. was it his? were you wearing his shirt in some weird goading way?

steve emerges from his room, shirtless and running a hand from his messy hair. eddie’s eyes flit between the shirt and steve. cogs slowly turning in his brain.

no. no the shirt wasn’t his.

it was the fucking shirt he’d kicked off of his foot when he’d stormed into steve’s room this morning. same boring design printed on the front.

on you.

from steve’s floor.

the night after steve had, very loudly, had a female friend over.

you’re oblivious, focussing on your bowl of soggy cornflakes as steve clatters around behind you. making his own bowl. neither of you looking at each other, making everything ten times more obvious.

‘you’re fuckin’ joking,’ he loudly proclaims, standing from the table, nearly sending the chair flying backwards.

your head shoots up, confused by what he had seemingly angered himself over now, ‘what?’ eyebrows knitted together as he storms over, mouth hung open in disbelief.

‘you fucked him?’ jabbing his finger at steve, ‘my best friend?’ arms flying around in anger.

you look to steve for some help, eddie positively fuming, his jaw clenched at your lack of an answer. in fact, your reaction, or lack thereof, had only solidified everything.

‘no,’ you eventually croak, ‘i- we-, that wasn’t me,’ stuttering for some excuse, though you know he didn’t buy a word of it.

eddie’s face twists up in a mix of anger and hurt, eyes glossing over as his lips tremble, ‘eddie-,’ steve begins, cut off as eddie storms out of the tiny kitchen, grabbing his wallet from the table and pausing when he opens the front door.

‘you deserve each other,’ he snarls before disappearing, shaking the walls with his violent slam of the door.

you stare at steve in silent disbelief, dropping the spoon into your discarded bowl. you’d predicted his reaction to go something along the lines of that, just not expecting it so soon. hoping to have prepared a solid speech in the meantime.

‘shit.’

‘it’s okay.. h-he was gonna find out eventually.. he’ll calm down,’ steve tries to soothe you, well aware that eddie held onto his anger, let it simmered until it all bubbled over and some poor soul got the brunt of months of rage.

you want to feel bad, feel guilty but when steve’s hand sits on top of yours, giving it a reassuring squeeze, it vanishes. his chestnut eyes providing a sense of comfort you’d never felt before.

-

you were used to eddie being out. missing in action for days on end. but by the fourth day of him not coming back to the apartment, the pit in your stomach starts to worsen.

the guilt had caught up to you, as if you were the one who had shoved him out of the door. you had, in a metaphorical sense.

the first few days were, nice. though you felt worse for even feeling that. but, you’d been hanging out with steve more. it was different to before, getting to know his personal quirks, the things that made him tick. something you would’ve brushed off before.

you were friends, sure. you hadn’t really had the opportunity to get to know him like this before. it would’ve felt like some sort of betrayal to eddie. even though in some ways the way it had come about now was much worse.

on the fifth day, you’re sat on the couch with steve. picking the hangnail from your finger, wincing as it started to bleed.

‘d’you think he might’ve gone home?’ you ask, looking up at steve who was spaced out next to you.

they were from the same small town, had started out sharing classes in high school and had since been friends. admittedly growing apart when you’d come into the picture. you’d heard stories from the others about how close they used to be, never apart, according to jonathan.

‘i dunno.. he hates hawkins,’ steve shrugs, seeing the worry spread across your face, ‘but i could call his uncle? see if he’s there?’

you nod, thumb in your mouth trying to pull off more of the sore skin. he gets up to grab his phone, already dialling the number when he comes back into the room.

‘hey! wayne.. it’s steve- yeah yeah, i’m good man.. i was just wondering if eddie was there? oh no, uh- well.. we haven’t heard from him in a few days, y’know what he’s like… sure, thanks man,’ clicking the button and ending the call.

he looks over at you, a pitying look on his face as he shakes his head no.

‘i’m sure he’s alright.. he’s dramatic, you know that,’ he collapses onto the couch, this time closer than before, nudging your elbow with a weak smile.

you were well versed with eddie’s dramatic personality. having dealt with his temper tantrums and storm outs for years now. though, it had never seemed this bad before.

realistically, you knew he was probably crashing on a friend’s sofa. overstaying his welcome and partying too much. he was likely coming down from some insane party as you sat thinking about him.

‘i just.. feel bad,’ you whisper, leaning into steve’s side. his arm reaches around to your shoulder, rubbing softly against your arm.

‘i know..i do too,’ he admits, you and eddie hadn’t been a romantic thing. not even really a thing, if you were being honest. it was sex and partying, getting completely trashed and using each other in an attempt to fill the void inside of you both.

but steve and eddie had been friends for years now. they’d argued over the stupidest shit but never something like a girl. steve had had to genuinely weigh up whether his friendship with eddie was worth losing.

if eddie couldn’t get over it, would steve be able to repress his feelings for you? or would he be fine with losing eddie if it meant that you were together?

when robin gets back from work, she narrows her eyes at the two of you curled up against each other, ‘is this gonna be a regular thing?’

‘would you have a problem with it if it was?’ you ask, watching as she dumps her back and slumps on the empty seat.

‘oh no, i’m just thinking about how much peace and quiet i’ll get if you and eddie aren’t screaming at each other every day,’ kicking her doc martens from her feet and leaning into the cushions.

‘if he comes back,’ you remind her.

she hadn’t really seemed too fazed when he’d stormed out. thankful for no more early morning wake up calls from his wooden bed frame. but you can tell that even she was beginning to feel at least a tiny bit worried.

‘he still not called?’

you shake your head, ‘no one’s seen him, he’s not home.. i guess we’ve just gotta wait til he’s calmed down,’ shrugging, more so trying to convince yourself rather than her.

no matter what, eddie had a special place in your heart. even if it wasn’t love in the romantic sense, there was too much there to disregard that. he was your best friend at one point, how could you?

it’s another five days of fretting and concern before you hear a word from him. your phone rings in the middle of the night and you sit up, feeling along the nightstand for the buzzing plastic. an unrecognised number.

‘hello?’ you speak into the receiver.

steve stirs, waking up at the sound of your voice. admittedly, you’d been sleeping in his bed. sharing kisses and late-night chats about just about everything. it all felt very quick, but just right. like now that’d you’d both realised that you could have this, that anything other than this felt wrong.

‘hi,’ eddie’s voice rings out, recognisable even through the phone.

‘eddie? you’re okay? where are you?’ you babble, steve sits up at the mention of his name.

‘i’m uh- with my dad, i just, listen.. i need you to bring me some shit.. we’re going away and i’ve got nothing with me,’ his voice crackles and you can hear him shift around in the payphone box.

‘what? you’re going where? where are you?’ baffled, unsure if you were still asleep and not understanding him.

‘away, i’m staying in porter.. look, can you do it?’

‘eddie that’s-,’ but you stop yourself, ‘yeah, sure.. when?’

‘tomorrow, i just need some clothes, my watch and my savings.. they’re under my mattress.. tiny box, you’ll see it,’ he rushes, running out of minutes.

‘o-okay, where shall i meet you? i don’t know it well,’ you garble, nodding at steve when he mouths a confused porters?

‘little bar called sam’s.. i’ll be in there, i’ve gotta go, this thing’s running out,’ he sighs, muttering a small, ‘thank you,’ before the line goes dead.

‘he’s at the fucking beach.. wants me to drop some shit for him.. he said he’s with his dad? i-i thought his dad left..?’

‘he did,’ steve looks puzzled, taking the phone from your clutch and looking at the withheld number, trying to figure out if he could call it back, ‘he left years ago..’

-

eddie’s smile falters when he notices that you’d bought steve and robin along. steve dropping your hand the second his eyes meet eddie’s.

‘what the fuck are you doing here?’ the chair scraping the wooden floor as he stands abruptly.

the man you can only assume is his dad looks over, gripping onto the beer bottle, eyes flitting between his son and your trio.

‘eddie.. i asked them to, we wanted to know if you were okay,’ your voice shakes, frowning when he scowls at you. you’ve pissed him off, again.

‘i called you because i trusted you, not him,’ he spits, walking over to where you were stood by the door, ‘where’s my shit?’

‘it’s in the car,’ quickly coming up with a lie, trying to keep him talking for as long as possible, ‘i need to talk to you.. before you.. leave,’ you pout, trying to get him away from his dad.

‘about?’ he hits back harshly, still upset that you’d even dared to bring steve along.

‘about.. everything,’ you exhale shakily, ‘give me five minutes, please.’

he looks back at his dad who checks his watch before shrugging. he couldn’t give a less of a shit as long he got this promised money.

‘fine,’ he says through gritted teeth, storming past a gormless steve and robin and exiting the restaurant.

you glance at steve before following him out, not sure how much longer you could convince him you’d bought everything he’d asked for.

he’s already lighting up a cigarette when you reach the street, perched against the windowsill in days-old clothes. he looked a mess. even worse than his usual gritty self. eye-bags and a sunken face to match.

you breathe out, how do you even start a conversation like this? sorry i fucked your best friend but i actually really like him was probably not the best way to go about it.

‘i’m sorry,’ seemed like the best place to start, ‘it wasn’t fair to you.. what i- we did.. i can’t tell you how shit it makes me feel.. to know that i hurt you.’

he blows the smoke out of his mouth, expressionless, ‘okay.’

is that it? after his great big performance that was all he could say?

‘what?’

‘i said, okay.. what d’you expect me to do? start crying and begging you to love me?’ scoffing as he takes a long draw of the cigarette. his eyes cold, merciless as he glares at you.

‘you ran away.. made everyone worried sick about you.. and all you can say is okay?’

he shrugs, ‘i’m over it.. you’re welcome to each other,’ stubbing the cigarette out on the brick wall, stepping closer to you.

your mouth opens and shuts, flabbergasted by his stinking attitude, ‘shout at me, scream.. fuck- hit me if you want to.. stop pretending like you don’t care.. because i know you eddie munson and i know you do.’

his eyes narrow, intimidating as he towers above, ‘i don’t give a shit, you’re only upset because you want me to.. that’s too bad,’ his adam’s apple bobs, a tell-tale sign that he was lying.

your eyes search his for anything. a glimmer of weakness.

but his eyes are stern, emotionless as his brows thread together.

the door to the bar creaks open and his dad stomps out, muttering to himself, ‘c’mon son, let’s get the fuck out of here,’ replacing eddie’s spot on the windowless ledge and lighting his own cigarette.

he doesn’t break eye contact, ‘i’m gonna take a leak and then i want my shit,’ jaw tense as he barges through the door.

you squeeze your eyes shut, biting onto your bottom lip before cricking your neck. that hadn’t gone exactly to plan. now what the fuck were you gonna do when he realised you hadn’t brought the one thing he’d asked for.

‘i know what women like you do,’ his dad speaks up, taking a long drag on the cigarette, ‘you don’t get to fuck up his life and then happily move on.’

eyes springing open when you realise he’s talking to you, ‘what the fuck did you just say?’

he laughs, a deep belly-laugh, ‘you heard.’

you’d love to smash the smug look from his dirty face. knock his head into the brick wall and drag eddie kicking and screaming back to steve’s cat whether he liked it or not.

‘women like me? the only person who cares enough to drive all the way out to this shithole to save your son? is that what you meant?’ stepping up towards him, as if you were even capable of doing anything.

‘you came to rub it in.. flaunting in with pretty boy there,’ his lips snarl, ‘pathetic really, shouldn’t have bothered.’

eddie comes back out, robin and steve trailing behind, trying to converse with him but being completely blanked, ‘where’s my shit then?’

‘uh.. steve’s car,’ beckoning to where you’d parked somewhere in the distance.

steve flashes you a worried look knowing damn well there was nothing eddie could want in his car. luckily eddie doesn’t pick up on it and instead starts walking in the direction you’d motioned, expecting you all to follow.

‘why’re you in such a hurry?’ you call out from behind, trying desperately to bide time. he was certain to flip his shit the second you reached the car and he figured you’d lied to him.

‘because i want to get the fuck out of here,’ he snaps back, charging on ahead.

you walk in silence to steve’s car, nervously glancing over at steve as eddie and his disgusting pig of a father walk on ahead. steve reaches over and gives your hand a reassuring squeeze though it doesn’t really do much.

eddie’s spots the car first, striding over and peering into the windows, ‘where’s my shit then?’ turning to glare at you with a disgusted look on his face.

your mouth opens and closes, no viable excuse coming to mind, ‘eddie.. i didn’t bring anything-,’ swallowing as you gain some slight confidence, ‘i’m not letting you go with him.’

his dad completely flips, turning to his son, ‘you’re fucking useless, you know that? how the fuck d’you manage to mess this one up?’ practically foaming at the mouth.

‘dad i told her! this isn’t my fault.. we can still go.. i’ll find the cash somewhere,’ his eyes pleading with the estranged man, he had shrunk back into a scared little boy right before your eyes.

his father shoves him away, snarling at his son, ‘you think i actually want to go anywhere with you? my colossal fuck up of a son? you’re dreaming,’ positively fuming.

‘but.. dad,’ he’s almost begging now, regressing back to the night he watched his father walk out on his mom, feeling the heartache all over again.

steve steps up, getting closer to the pair, ‘you should go,’ placing his hand on the man’s arm.

he jerks his arm from steve’s grip, scoffing at you all, ‘don’t bother trying to find me again.. i don’t wanna know,’ poking his sausage finger into eddie’s chest before pulling himself away and trundling off back to the bar you’d met in.

your eyes immediately turn to eddie who was watching the man leave for the second time, tears pricking in his eyes. your chest pangs with hurt, you’d never meant for it to happen like this.

eddie speeds off in the opposite direction and you have to pull on steve’s arm to stop him from going after the boy, ‘he’ll come.. just.. give him a few minutes,’ nodding reassuringly.

steve sighs before turning to face you, ‘okay, you should go anyway.’

‘yeah.’

deciding that it had probably been enough time, you follow eddie’s path and eventually find him perched on a crumbling stoke wall, aggressively wiping his cheeks when he spots you walking over.

you sit in the empty spot next to him, staring down at the grey concrete. not wanting to break the silence and potentially piss him off more.

‘fuck,’ eddie finally breathes, sniffing and wiping his nose on his filthy sleeve. he clearly hadn’t showered in days and you wonder what on earth they could’ve possibly been doing.

‘i’m sorry,’ you croak. you weren’t just sorry for not allowing him to run off with that wretched man but for the fact that you and steve had quite obviously betrayed him.

you hear him swallow and then a rustling from his pocket. looking up to find him with a cigarette hanging onto his lip. he offers the box out to you, as he usually would.

delicately taking one from the pack and placing it in your mouth, waiting patiently for the lighter.

you sit smoking your cigarettes in the calming silence for a few minutes. gazing out at the horizon, the sky awash with all sorts of moody greys. fitting.

‘are you coming home?’ you ask quietly, standing from the wall with your hands shoved in your pockets.

eddie exhales, his eyes closing briefly before he stands, ‘yeah.. yeah let’s go,’ admitting defeat as he lets go of his dad forever, ready to put an end to his reckless escapade.

robin and steve are leaning against his car when you walk back. there had been a silent agreement to not mention it. just get in the car and go.

you sat in the back with eddie, watching as he stares out of the window, pressing his forehead against the cold glass. you move over into the middle seat, resting your head against his shoulder.

things would be alright.

-

things had been actually sorta alright. eddie had seemingly come to terms with you and steve becoming a thing. at least, if he hadn’t, he’d been keeping it to himself.

you tried to keep things respectable of course, jumping apart when he’d enter the room or going off to your own room and creeping into steve’s when eddie had gone to bed. but he wasn’t stupid. and you knew he wasn’t stupid. it just seemed better than rubbing it in his face.

things were completely different with steve and you’d felt a sense of pressure that hadn’t been present with eddie. steve was soft and kind but you couldn’t be so laidback about everything with him.

when you’d disappear at parties to split a bag with someone, he’d want to know. or when you were upset and stressed out, he’d want to know why, how he could help.

which was fair enough, obviously. it was just different. before, eddie would offer some generic advice and a spliff and be done with it. now, you were expected to actually address your issues head-on, not just bury them with sex and drink.

finals week had been harsh on all of you. the apartment in disarray as you were all working overtime to save your grade and not get kicked out of college.

you’d, perhaps a bit unfairly, taken your stress out on steve. arguing with him about menial shit that you didn’t really care about, just finding any excuse to shout and push him away.

he’d sit there and take it, offering sensible solutions and trying to resolve whatever bullshit you’d made up that day. a stark difference to eddie who would’ve screamed straight back at you.

come friday night, you’d all finished exams, sitting around the table when eddie swanned in, flapping some flyer for a party, going on about how you should all go.

‘we’re finished, free,’ he argued, pleading his case to the three of you.

robin flat-out refused, said she needed to sleep for a solid week and then she’d be ready to party. steve umm’d and ahh’d, settling on staying in but he was down to go out tomorrow.

‘i’ll go,’ you speak up, eyeing eddie from across the table, you hadn’t hung out alone yet. this would be a new feat.

‘alright,’ he shrugs, looking at steve for his permission or straight up denial of you two going alone.

steve just nods, ‘alright, call me if you need anything,’ glancing at you with an assured smile.

he wasn’t worried. not really. you’d shown him plenty of times that you loved him even despite your incessant attempts to push him away. even in the bad arguments, he’d kept his cool and waited for you to come to him, keeping everything on your terms.

you’re nervous though. you and eddie partying together had never been a good idea, egging each other on, getting utterly trashed just because he’d dare you to.

not tonight. you swore to yourself before leaving. pressing a tender kiss on steve’s lips, leaving traces of your sticky lipgloss behind.

-

eddie’s pov

it’s a little after midnight when steve gets a phone call from eddie, asking him to come and pick you up. still waking up as he walks across campus, passing countless drunk students as he finds the thumping party.

you’re incoherent on the couch, steve’s eyebrows raising expectedly as he walks into the room. eddie stood to the side watching as your arms instinctively wrap around steve’s neck. even in your drunken stupor you went straight to steve.

it fucking stings.

he looks on worriedly as steve hoists you from the couch, ‘hey man.. uh, she said some pretty weird things tonight, i dunno.. i don’t think she’s okay,’ recalling your earlier slurred words.

you hadn’t meant to, but you’d spilled everything to eddie. a tequila fuelled rant about how steve was so perfect and how bad you felt that you just weren’t. how you didn’t know how to stop pushing him away, even when you didn’t want to.

steve nods, it wasn’t like he didn’t already know you were on this self-destructive warpath. he just wasn’t sure how to tell you that you didn’t need to do this without sounding like a dick.

your arms lazily flop around his neck, laying your head against his chest as he carried you bridal style through the party and right across campus back to your apartment. eddie trailing behind in silence.

‘thanks.. for calling me,’ steve smiles as he nudges his bedroom door open just as eddie was about to disappear into his own room.

‘course,’ he nods, melancholy as he watches your fingers curl around steve’s jacket, pulling him down onto the bed with you, babbling a chorus of steve’s and love you’s as his door closes.

cursing himself for never being that soft with you. never providing that level of safety.

he lies awake for hours, staring at the ceiling. at some point he hears you tumble out of steve’s room, rushing to the bathroom and subsequently throwing up into the toilet. debating whether to hop out of his own bed and help.

but then the padding of steve’s feet make their way through the hallway, his soft voice helping you brush your teeth and get cleaned up. eddie’s assistance was unnecessary. damn, he wouldn’t have a clue what to even do.

on the occasions that you’d thrown up in the morning, eddie would’ve led in bed and laughed. called you a pussy and waited for you to crawl back to bed in a mood. he wasn’t gentle like steve. that shit came as a second nature to him but to eddie? not a touch of it.

he even hears the soft kiss he gives you on the way back to his room, your appreciative little murmur and the click of his door shutting again. 

and he wants to kick himself. scream and cry and throw a tantrum because in an ideal world, that would’ve been him.

but he can’t blame you, no matter how much he tried. it’s his fault he’s such a colossal fuck up. not yours. not steve’s. his.

he eventually gives up and moves to the couch, not getting much luck at sleeping in his bed. the suns rising when he hears snippets of your hushed conversation.

it didn’t sound angry. or even upset. just barely audible speaking’s about your feelings.

‘i know.. i don’t mean to,’ he can hear, a twinge of sadness in your tone.

‘you don’t need to.. not with me,’ steve mumbles and the blankets rustle, snapping him out of his trance.

he can hear small i love you’s and the sound of lips smacking. but then your muffled breathy moans start and the bile rises in his throat. undeniably he knew what was going on in there, everything being confirmed by the rhythmic creaking of the mattress.

and he knows what you look like. he can see it. feel it. hell, he lived for it at one point

pushes himself from the sofa and straight out of the door. not wanting to hear a second more.

-

you don’t feel as bad as expected in the morning, rough but not as bad as you should be feeling.

robin’s now ready to celebrate, steve agreeing and you almost want to hurl at the mention of going out. eddie sits in silence at the end of the table, he’d been pretty strange this morning and you’d wondered if you said something to upset him last night.

you could vaguely recall the self-pitying spiel you’d forced him to listen to. physically cringing at the fact you’d started crying and wailing about steve to him.

robin suggests having some people over, just a small thing with close friends. maybe if everyone was up for it you could all go out afterwards. that you could agree to.

she rounds the troops, calling the friend you all shared. who all agreed to get there at eight. something small and casual she repeats down the phone.

there’s a few tag-alongs, people you’d met briefly at parties or friends of friends who had been dragged along. so it wasn’t the small gathering you’d pictured with just the gang. but it was okay.

the speaker being turned to max and the living room full of people. everyone in high spirits because finals had finished and were relatively confident that they’d at least scraped a pass.

you edge through the crowd, waking over to steve who was splayed out on the couch, spliff hanging from his fingers. he grins when he sees you, opening his arms.

‘hey pretty girl,’ beckoning for you to climb onto his lap, arms snug around your waist as he passes the spliff to you, still giggling at his pet name.

eddie glowers from behind the couch, huffing before pushing himself up and storming into the kitchen. he hadn’t realised how much he’d already drank, liquor coursing through his veins.

‘watch it,’ someone exclaims when eddie barges into their arm, subsequently spilling his beer onto the boys shirt.

eddie sees red. turning to the boy and snarling as he shoves his chest, sending him to the floor.

‘what the fuck did you say?’ grabbing the boy by the collar before smashing his fist into the side of the poor boys face.

steve hears the commotion, leering over the sofa to see what the fuck was even going on. he shoves you off of his lap, running to go and grab eddie from on top of this boy.

you finally see what everyone had crowded around, watching as eddie’s fist pummels into his now bloody face. only easing when steve grabs onto his arms, gasping for breath as he’s thrown back into reality. realisation setting in about what he’d just down.

people rush to the unconscious boy, somebody screaming to call an ambulance. the music cuts out harshly, silence echoing around the room as you stare at eddie, wide-eyed. terrified.

you’d never seen him like this. so brutal, covered in someone else’s blood. his chest falls and rises, staring back at you with an equally as horrified expression. steve is saying something to him but it’s not registering. a ringing in his ears as the world crashed and burned around him.

the police turn up alongside the ambulance crew. taking statements from whoever hadn’t left and eventually cuffing eddie. muttering about crazy fucking kids and quite forcefully pulling him from the apartment.

his eyes lingering on yours as he’s guided out. steve’s arms wrap around your shoulders, pulling you into his chest, resting his chin on the top of your head. you’re still in disbelief, tears welling in your eyes as you remember how unforgiving and downright cruel he’d been.

‘you wanna go to bed?’ steve asks, chest vibrating with his low voice. fingers combing through your hair, in your own corner of the living room as robin and nancy attempt to clean the floor.

jonathan and argyle are picking up tiny shards of glass, not an ounce of conversation between them. all still reeling from eddie’s outburst. you were sure he was going to jail, there wasn’t any way he could possibly wriggle out of this one.

‘we should-,’ the words getting caught in your throat, ‘we need to help clean,’ pulling back to look at the state of the room, discarded cups and splatters of alcohol on the walls.

‘we’re nearly done.. you should go to bed,’ robin nods, wringing the cloth out into the sink.

even they had come to the conclusion that this was something to do with you. you and steve in particular. the way eddie’s eyes had locked onto you the second steve had pulled him off of the boy.

you knew it. he’d been frosty and unusual with you all morning. with everyone in fact.

-

eddie emerges from his room for the first time in days. looking worse for wear and feeling just as shit. the tag on his ankle restricting him from leaving the apartment freely.

he peers down at the blinking red light, mentally cursing the plastic as he drags his feet along the carpet. he can hear you and steve chatting quietly, not really able to make out what was being said.

not expecting you both to be sprawled out on the couch, your leg draped over his waist as your delicate fingers combed through his hair. the last few days had been so bleak, that he couldn’t really find it in himself to hate that you were sharing these moments with steve.

he sighs loudly, hoping to let you know he’d entered the room. not wanted to be involuntarily including in whatever may have happened next.

you sit up slightly, gazing at him stood behind the kitchen counter, ‘hey,’ it’s quiet, but he hears it. almost deciding to ignore until he remembers how much you’d doted on him and helped him recently.

‘hi,’ but he doesn’t look back, staring into the empty fridge, waiting for something to materialise. but it doesn’t.

‘when’s your court date?’

the words sear in his ear, an unwelcome subject.

‘next tuesday,’ deciding upon a swig of milk straight from the carton, not exactly the five-course meal he was hoping for.

‘okay well, we were.. we’re gonna come, y’know.. for support,’ your eyes are unrelenting, following him around the kitchen.

‘don’t bother, i’m pleading innocent,’ completely monotonous in his response.

he’d already argued with the state provided lawyer about this. a shoddy man who could not care less whether eddie went down or not, just wanting to cash his cheque at the end of it all.

the balding man had called him stupid, ‘there are multiple witnesses.. plead guilty and they’ll probably pity you n’ slap you with some community service or summit.. don’t be stupid son.’

you scoff, using steve’s chest as leverage as you sit up properly, ‘you’re joking? right?’

his eyes finally meet yours, thumping his fists on the marble counter, ‘i am innocent,’ no one could understand where he was coming from, not even the man who was being paid to at least pretend to care and understand.

‘you beat the shit out of him, eddie.. you broke his fucking jaw,’ your eyes are wide, looking at him like he’s an idiot- which he was, but not about this.

‘i was provoked, self defence,’ he says in all serious. he was frustrated, lashed out but at the end of it all, the guy had bashed him first.

‘wh- because he accidentally knocked into you? you really must be fucking stupid.. what are you thinking?’

eddie notices steve, or what he could see of him, tense up, obviously not wanting to anger the violent monster eddie had become in so many people’s eyes.

‘it’s my choice.. i was fucking provoked, saw some stupid shit.. that’s not my fault,’ relinquishing the blame to you.

in his eyes, if he hadn’t seen the disgusting display of affection, he probably wouldn’t have fucked up that boy. but he had, and that wasn’t his fault. so how was he guilty?

‘you’re ridiculous.. i actually can’t believe you,’ your eyes full of disappointment.

the way your face falls, eyes narrowed and sharp as knives makes his heart twist. genuine hurt flashed on your face. almost paralleling the horrified expression you’d held as he was cuffed and dragged away.

‘it’s my decision, i wouldn’t expect you to know a thing about what it’s like to be me,’ kicking the fridge door closed with a loud thump.

you disappear from his sight, flopping back down onto steve’s chest with an exasperated sigh. he rolls his eyes before stomping off into his bedroom. his mood probably wouldn’t be so terrible if he could just leave this godforsaken apartment.

actually, why shouldn’t he? if you were so certain that he was going to jail anyway, what harm was there in going out? fuck it.

so he gets dressed, pulling his denim jacket on and spritzing himself with aftershave. he’d worry about the tag later, surely one of his buddies would have something to hack it off with. hopefully with minimal damage to his leg.

you don’t even look up from steve’s eyes when he comes back out, having had enough of his idiotic attitude for the day.

‘woah, where are you go-,’ steve starts before being cut off with the front door shutting, he was gone, without so much of a look back.

jogging down the stairs and out of this suffocating hellhole.

-

it doesn’t take long for the police to show up, banging their fists on the door and red in the face with anger.

they grilled you and steve for what felt like hours. making sure you hadn’t helped in his escape. tearing his room apart for some sort of clue to where he’d gone.

‘we found the tag at a location not far from here.. could anyone be hiding him? he’s in serious trouble.. we need anything you’ve got,’ the officer pleads, frustrated with having to deal with this bullshit on a thursday night. you don’t blame him.

you shake your head, ‘no.. i-i mean, there’s a few bars down on main but our friends aren’t stupid enough to help him.’

any previous feelings of worry had disappeared, replaced with frustration. you weren’t prepared to spend your whole life trying to find eddie every time he decided to run away. he so obviously didn’t give a shit about what you thought, it was a waste of energy at this point.

the officer sighs, ‘right, well you let us know if he gets in contact or comes back here,’ rummaging in his pocket for a small bit of card, ‘that’s my personal number.. call me straight away.’

you nod, thumbing the glossy card and flopping back onto the couch. steve shows them out, closing the door softly after they leave. he gives you a look, full of pity. he doesn’t say a thing but you know what he’s thinking.

‘i’m done,’ holding your hands up, ‘he can get himself out of this one.. i don’t care anymore,’ surrendering completely.

he nods, looking as just as tired as you felt. sometimes you forget that this isn’t just between you and eddie, steve is right in the middle of it all too, staying quiet and holding back for eddie’s sake.

you’d tried to be courteous and thoughtful with eddie. pulling away from steve when he’d enter the room, trying not to be so overly affectionate in front of him. you felt like maybe you owed him that for how you’d gone about it, but why?

not once had he ever shown interest in being with you romantically, he was the one that’d explicitly said that you and him were friends with some added benefits. screw him.

‘you hungry? i wanna get out of here,’ pushing yourself from the couch and throwing your arms around steve’s waist, cheek squished against his chest.

‘i could eat,’ returning the hug, swaying slightly as his hands roam around your back.

-

eddie’s pov

eddie checks his phone for the umpteenth time.

no new notifications

he was anticipating at least something from you by now. hell, even a pathetic hi would’ve sufficed. the man wasn’t dumb, choosing to hole himself up in gareth’s basement with a six-pack rather than hitting the main spots.

he questions whether the dinghy, dark basement was any better than the confines of the room he’d escaped. supposing that you and steve weren’t next door, anything would be better.

he debates just calling you first. curious to know why you hadn’t called. maybe after the next beer. or maybe now. fuck it, it’s already dialling.

it rings and rings, becoming increasingly concerned with your well-being.

‘what?’ your voice rings out after the fifth or sixth ring.

he’s taken aback, ‘hello to you too,’ taking another swig of beer, his knees pulled up to his chest.

‘what d’you want?’

christ. you really weren’t falling for it this time.

‘nothin’.. just expected to hear from you by now, that’s all.’

he can hear the eye roll through the phone, your tiny almost inaudible little tut, ‘i’m not saving you this time.’

‘i didn’t ask you to.’

‘so why’d you call then? i’m busy.’

‘you with steve?’ he doesn’t even know why he asked, of course you were.

‘yeah, i am.. is that what you wanted to hear? or were you hoping i was out searching for you with the police?’

ouch. you’d called him out. figured out his silly game and threw it straight back in his face.

‘i didn’t- you just had to rub it in, didn’t you?’ anger rising in his throat, ‘you always do.’

‘you think i’m doing this to make you jealous? this isn’t about you anymore.. you need to get over yourself,’ you sigh, empathetic about the harsh words that’d just spilled out, ‘i love him, eddie.. you’re gonna have to deal with that.’

and with that the phone clicks. you’d hung up. you had hung up on him, no grovelling or pleading for him to come back home. that was it. the harsh truth and now he had to just sit with it.

his head falls back against the cold brick, staring up at the damp covered ceiling, weighing up his options. he knew he’d fucked up. best case scenario, he’d get a couple extra months on his sentence. worst case, they’d throw the book at him for wasting their time.. not to mention the already hefty sentence for the assault.

you had completely and utterly exhausted yourself trying to support him and even you had had enough. he only had himself to blame for that. maybe jail would be a good thing? he could get his head straight.. get over you, maybe even find some purpose in his life.

he pulls another beer from the pack, cracking it open and taking a long swig. exhaling as the bitter liquid seeps down his throat. there was only one way out of this fucked situation and he knew that.

-

eddie perks up when he hears your key in the door, sat on the couch for what seemed like hours waiting for you both to get back.

your face drops the instant you see him, gripping onto steve’s hand as you walk into the dimly lit living room.

eddie stands, holding up his hands, ‘i’m gonna hand myself in.. i just-,’ he exhales deeply, ‘i wanted to say goodbye,’ jaw tense as he looms between you and steve.

‘you are? do you want me to call the sheriff? i- he gave me his number..’

‘no, no.. i’m gonna go down there.. it’s easier,’ eddie motions towards the door, shaking his head.

you stand dumbfounded for a second before nodding slowly, chewing on the inside of your cheek, ‘it’s the right thing to do..’ the lump in your throat growing as you look back at the pathetic man in front of you.

steve gives him a weak smile, patting his hand on your arm. there’s a brief moment of silence. the three of you all staring back at one another in awe of the fucked up mess you’d wound up in.

‘c’mere,’ steve motions to eddie, walking over to the boy with arms outstretched. he pulls him into a bear hug, clapping his palm on eddie’s back.

from the look on eddie’s face squished against steve’s shoulder you can tell he needed it, ‘i’ll miss you man..’ he breathes into his best friend’s sweater.

‘we’ll come and visit.. you’re not getting rid of me that easy,’ his laugh is shaky as he pulls away, smiling proudly at his friend.

you stand slightly behind steve, watching on with tears brimming in your eyes. even though steve had tried to reassure you, you couldn’t help but feel so guilty that this had ultimately all happened because of you.

eddie walks over slowly, throwing his arms around your body, gripping his fingers into your arms knowing that this may very well be the last time he ever got to hold you like this.

your arms cling around his waist, cheek pressed against his chest, ‘i’m proud of you..’ was all you managed to croak out, tears wetting his dirty t-shirt.

he sniffs, swallowing the lump in his throat, ‘thank you.. for everything,’ because truly, you were the only person to never give up on him, even if he had made it incredibly difficult for you.

you lift your head off of his chest, staring up at him with sodden cheeks, bottom lip quivering as you let go of him. both physically and emotionally.

he puffs his cheeks out, wiping his face with the back of his hand before clearing his throat and nodding at the pair of you, ‘you take care of her..’ eyebrow raised.

‘aye aye captain,’ steve gives him a tight lipped smile and a half-assed salute, watching as the man he had grown up with walked out of the apartment, head held high and a newfound spring in his step.

the end of the beginning.

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve stranger things #steve harrington angst #steve harrington x y/n #stranger things x you #steve harrington fic #eddie munson #eddie munson angst #eddie munson x reader #eddie stranger things #steve harrington smut

[starbabyg]

pleaseeeeeee jack and trevor share her

Picture Perfect pt. 3 | Jack Hughes x reader x Trevor Zegras

part one and part two right hereeee

warnings; smut duh, the words cock and other funky words that make me squirm, jealous Jack , also a bit shitty writing lol

+++

Trevor couldn’t get you off his mind ever since that day. It’s all he could think of, the way your pussy gripped around Jack’s dick. The sound of your angelic moans. It was sick the way all of his thoughts were revolving around you. Trevor couldn’t even face Jack any more. He had been avoiding him at all costs, too scared he’d blurt out how he needed to fuck you to get you out of his head.

You walked out of your room and into the living room, seeing Jack playing a video game with his feet up on the coffee table. “Hey, isn’t it guy’s night shouldn’t you be at the lake house?”

“Yeah, but Trev said he couldn’t make it again. I think he’s doing that shit on purpose cause Cole told me he saw him the other day,” Jack responded, not looking up at you. He had a rough demeanor about it, but inside Jack was just a bit hurt that it seemed like his best friend was avoiding him.

“Is he mad at you or something?” You made your way to the kitchen island, grabbing a mandarin and peeling it to snack on.

“Can’t be, I didn’t do shit to him. And I mean it this time.”

“Well when was the last time you even saw him?”

“That one weekend he came over and watched us fuck. Told me he’d call me to chill afterwards, never did,” he shrugged.

“You don’t think he was weirded out by the situation? Like at least a little bit? I mean he did watch us have sex,” you concluded.

Jack recollected the event, he knew Trevor was nervous about it but he didn’t think that he would be weirded out by it, “I don’t fucken know, I thought we were close enough for that. We’ve joked about it before, banging groupies together— all before I met you of course.”

“Mmhmm,” you nodded. “Still, it was a hypothetical situation. And I’m your girlfriend, Jack. Not a groupie you’re never going to see again. It adds a certain nuance to the situation don’t you think?”

Your words made Jack think deeply, and one thing about Jack is he hates getting deep in his thoughts. He furrowed his brows, what you said confusing him just a bit. “Yeah I guess that’s true. But whatever, I’m just gonna confront him and ask him why he’s being like this.” Jack got up from his spot, putting his slides on and grabbing his keys. If Trevor was going to avoid him the only thing he could do was be right there where he had no choice but to see Jack.

“Stupid Trevor avoiding me like a weirdo. Making me drive to his house cause he wants to be lame. Funky ass missing guys night again,” Jack grumbled the whole drive to Trevor’s place.

When Jack arrived to Trevor’s place he was less upset and more hurt by the fact his best friend hadn’t responded to his texts or calls. That it had really got to the point where he had to actually drive to his house to see him face to face. Nevertheless he knocked, picking his posture up and preparing himself for the confrontation.

“Yo–” Trevor opened the door with a smile on his face, which faded with the sight of a less than happy Jack on the other side of the door. “Oh, what’s up Jack,” he now monotonously greeted.

“What’s up? That’s all you gotta say bro?” Jack started off, his hurt feelings getting to him, “You’ve been flaking on me. Not answering my calls or texts. Just straight up dodging me. What’s up with you?” At that moment he sounded like a heartbroken girlfriend, but at that moment he was.

Trevor was taken a back just a bit, but fully understood where Jack was coming from. “It’s just that I um, I’ve just been—“ he stuttered and stammered, not being able to form a cohesive sentence.

“You’ve what? Whatever it is, it just sucks you’re not able to communicate it with me. Being as we’re like best friends and all,” Jack spoke vulnerably, something he had taken up from you.

Trevor sighed, the words resonating with him. He realized he just had to face the problem head on, and tell Jack what was going on in his head. “Listen,” Trevor looked down, not being able to look Jack in the eyes, “It’s hard for me to tell you this. I never in a million years thought I’d be in this situation. Ever. Like ever. It makes me sick just thinking about it. But, watching you fuck y/n was a huge mistake.”

“Was it too much for you? She told me you probably thought I was weird, god I’m embarrassed—“

Trevor cut him off, “No, no. It’s not that. Like at all. It’s just that you were right about everything you said. About y/n,” Trev took a deep breath to muster up courage and to finish, “So right to the point that I can’t get her out of my head. Just seeing the way she fucked you and shit. It’s been stuck on my mind. I’ve never seen no one fuck like that ever in my life. And you know how many girls I’ve fucked.”

Jack didn’t know how to react or respond. Yeah, he was proud of you because he knew you were the top of the top, cream of the crop. But also, his best friend was lusting after you, his girlfriend.

“So you gotta crush on y/n?”

“I don’t know if you can say crush, she’s a great girl and all but I know you two are meant for each other. It’s just, she has that sexual prowess. If anything it’s like a fuck crush.”

“A fuck crush,” Jack raised an eyebrow, trying to comprehend what Trevor just said. The entire situation was difficult for him to comprehend.

“Yeah. Not to objectify her or anything. But she just looked so fucking amazing fucking you.”

Jack pursed his lips, “So if I let you fuck her can you stop being weird?”

“Wait, what did you just say?” Trevor had to double take, cause after everything, he knows Jack didn’t say what he just said.

“If I let you fuck her, can you stop being weird,” Jack drew out his words.

“No way. I’m not going to fuck your girlfriend and no way you’re actually going to let me fuck her just like that.”

“If it’ll make you get over whatever the hell a fuck crush is, then yeah. Get her out of your system so we can be cool again. I don’t wanna lose my best friend over some petty shit like this, cmon Trev.”

“Jack, listen to what you’re saying. Are you really going to let me fuck your girlfriend.”

“I’m not all too keen about you taking her all by yourself. Not no cuck shit. But remember when we always talked about tag teaming a girl?”

“Yeah, I kinda remember,” he recalled all the conversations from when they both first got into the league, bragging about all the pussy they were gonna get.

“Well, how about a threesome with my girlfriend,” Jack proposed, “God it makes me sick just thinking about it. But if there’s anyone I would have a threesome with it’d be you.”

“Jesus Jack, you’ve put me in a sick situation. A sick sick situation. I wanna say yes but I wanna say no.”

“Like I said, if this is what it takes for shit to go back to normal I’m all for it,” Jack sighed.

“You sure that you’re sure?”

“As sure as I can be, In this moment. I might come to regret it but you know my dumb ass just lives in the moment,” shaking his head, Jack tried to push all negative thoughts away.

Trevor contemplated, because the first time he said yes to one of Jack’s asinine ideas he got put in this situation. But still, he just couldn’t get you out of his mind. His body was feening to feel yours against his. To feel you ride him the way you rode Jack. It was driving him borderline insane. The whole situation was a catch 22 for him.

“Are you sure y/n even wants this? I mean look at the position we put her in,” classic Trevor, always worried about you where Jack had always been mindless.

“You saw the way she was about to go down on you. Seems like we’re all consenting in this situation.” He recalled the way you so easily crawled over to Trevor without a second thought, about to take him inside your mouth just as you would with him. It sparked a tinge of jealousy in him, but at the same time also turned him on seeing you from another point of view.

“I just don’t want this to make shit even more weird than it already is. I know how much you love her and you know how much I love you.”

“Yeah, I know. That’s why I trust both of you to even do any of this shit. We’ve been best friends since like forever, and to be honest I’ve never been in love with someone as much as I’m in love with y/n. And I’m the one who put us all in this place, being the show off I am. Can’t bitch out now.”

“Jack, if this goes south I’m literally gonna kill myself. I’m already dead inside from shame and embarrassment,” Trev spoke with his eyes squeezed shut. It was still difficult for him to look Jack in his eyes.

“Jesus Zegras, don’t be so morbid.”

So right then and there Jack and Trevor set a day for the threesome. With Trevor freaking out the whole time, and Jack trying to calm him down, you were clueless to the whole ordeal.

It was a Friday evening, Jack running errands and you taking the day off from the hectic week. You laid in the king sized bed the two of you shared, only in one of Jack’s oversized graphic tee shirts and a pair of lace panties that you so loved to adorn.

“Hey princess,” you felt Jack’s hand run up your bare leg. Your eyes fluttered open, still adjusting to your surroundings. Everything was always hazy when you first woke up.

“Hi my love,” you sleepily smiled at him. You turned so you were no longer on your side, but leaning your back against the headboard. Still blinking to adjust, you could now make out another person in the room.

“How was your little nap? You still look sleepy my little love bug,” Jack smiled at you. He loved how you looked when you first woke up, always with a look of clueless confusion, brows upturned and bottom lip stuck out just a bit.

“It was fine, hadda nice dream. Probably coulda slept through the whole night I was so comfortable,” you rubbed your eye and stretched as you finally started to actually wake up.

“Yeah? I got someone here who wants to see you though,” he told you, his thumb still rubbing that spot on your leg.

“Huh? Who?” You turned, seeing Trevor stand idly by the door, “Oh hey Trevor, long time no see. How you been?” You softly smiled up at him.

“Hey y/n,” he timidly waved. Seeing you in person sucked every ounce of courage that was inside of him. If he was nervous before, now he was a complete wreck. He tried to mask it by mustering up a half smile.

“Trevor’s been feeling some type of way,” Jack started.

“Hm? What d’ya mean?” You questioned confused.

Jack looked towards him, not being able to tell you himself, from lack of words to say it or refusal, no one knows.

“Jack, I can’t say it,” Trev shook his head. Between you and Jack, it was just too much to be put on the spot and confess how you had him feeling.

Jack stood up, “Well, I’m gonna get a drink. I’ll be right back. Give you some space.” This wasn’t just for Trevor to finally relay how he feels about you. Jack himself just couldn’t stand to be in the room while it happened. He knew what was about to go down, yet his possessive instincts kicked in. He had to at least be a little tipsy before consciously going through with another one of his crazy ideas.

“Are you like, grossed out by me or something? That I could actually go through with fucking Jack in front of you? Do you look at me differently now?”

“Yes, I look at you differently.”

“Oh,” was all you could say.

“But not in that way. Y/n, I just can’t seem to get you out of my head. Ever since I saw you fuck Jack, I just can’t. I’ve had this sick craving, I needed to feel what Jack felt. It makes me sick that I can’t feel you bounce on my cock, that I can’t just flip you over and fuck you how Jack did. I just can’t stand not being able to experience you like that,” finally all the words spilled from his brain and out for you to hear. “And I know I shouldn’t feel this way because you’re my best friends girlfriend, that’s why I’ve been avoiding Jack. Because of you. Because I can’t have you the way I want to. The way I need to.”

“Trevor, I–”

“It’s fine y/n. You don’t have to try and let me down easy. Jack wanted to bring me here to get you out of my system but this is another insane idea I just can’t go through with and put you through.” Trevor turned hastily to get out of there as quickly as possible.

You shot up as fast as you could and grabbed Trev by his arm, pulling him back into the room. “No Trevor, I was gonna say I can help you get over me. Guys always get over it once they get what they want right?” You softly chuckled.

Trevor sighed, “Y/n I don’t want you to think of it like that. I really like you, you’re perfect for Jack. I– just don’t know where this sudden infatuation came from.”

“I know Trev, it doesn’t have to be that way. Let’s just get this over with and forget it all happened mm?” You tilted your head, your hand that grabbed him now making its way up his tricep. The way Trevor talked about this situation, how he viewed you now, sparked something tantalizing inside of you.

“W-what about Jack?”

“Well we’ll just have to get his blessing, right?” You pulled Trevor out of the room, to where Jack was seated on the kitchen island, beer in hand. “Jacky baby, is it alright if I get to play with Trev tonight? That is what you brought him over for right?”

Jack took a deep gulp, he hated the words that came out of your mouth but he loved the sultry way that you spoke him, he couldn’t stop himself from breathlessly staring and nodding. Just like Trevor, he too was trapped under your siren spell. You could never do anything without Jack, so you gripped him by his wrist and yanked him up from his solitude. You’d need the space of the big California king bed for the three of you.

“I think it’s only fair that Trevor gets to undress me,” grabbing his hands, you set them at the hem of the large tee shirt you wore. There really wasn’t much for him to strip your body off. Trevor’s breath hitched, this really was the moment, he’s finally getting what he wanted. Slowly he lifted the shirt up, your arms raised. Jack sat there with anticipation, palming himself through his sweatpants. So this is what it looks like to the neighbors huh. He was loving this point of view, seeing you in another light.

Now just standing in your bra, panties, and knee high socks, Trevor’s brain had flipped a switch. It’s as if his brain went feral, urging him to grab your supple breasts. He cupped them, feeling the fullness of them in his palms, squeezing them, the flesh filling in the gaps between his fingers.

“Screw this bra, it needs to go now,” he mumbled under his breath. Trevor reached around to your backside, feeling for the hooks. Trevor fumbled with it, trying to use one hand to unhook it was proving difficult. Jack saw this, and he himself started to get impatient.

“You’re taking too long, let me do it,” he smacked his lips together, slightly shoving Trevor out of the way. Swiftly, with one hand Jack had unlatched your bra, with the straps falling off your dainty shoulders. Jack smirked at Trevor, who only looked back with his mouth agape. “Perfect titties.”

“Mhmm,” Trevor agreed with Jack, bending down and taking one in his mouth. Trevor started sucking it softly, the feather like sensation causing you to gasp. Seeing that Trevor could get that kind of reaction out of you made Jack grow a tinge jealous. Although it was all turning him on, he was feeling that bit possessive feeling over you. Jack planted himself onto your other boob, suctioning to it with pressure.

“Oh my god,” you moaned as Jack gently rolled your nipple in between his teeth. The slight pain mixed with the intense pleasure sent shocks through your body. Where Jack was going rough, Trevor went soft. With the slightest touch of his tongue he flicked it in all the right places around your areola. Starting with the bottom, swinging around the top, then making a full circle around the whole nipple. The two differing pressures started to make your vision hazy, your legs starting to buckle and give out. Sensing this, and knowing your body, Jack went behind you, now supporting your weight as your naked body pressed against him. Jack moved your hair to one side out of the way and pressed kisses from the nape of your neck upwards. One hand held your waist, the other gripping the bare flesh of your boob, rolling the nipple between his index and middle finger.

Seeing Jack supporting the upper portion of your body, Trevor kneeled down, planting a kiss to your clit as he placed himself in between your legs, putting both knees on his shoulders and hoisting you up. With your body now in the air, lifted up by the two boys, Trevor began to lap his tongue on your pussy, licking up your labia and up to the crown of your clit. You squirmed, your legs locking around his neck. The feather like kitten licks so slight and so gentle, although it wasn’t a lot of pressure it stimulated your bundle of nerves in all the right ways. With Trev’s hands on your backside he started to grip and grab at the flesh of your bottom before taking his right hand to insert two fingers inside your vulva. He curled his fingers down, caving into the floor of your silky walls.

All Jack could hear was the slurps of Trevor’s mouth and the squelching sound of your pussy, and quite frankly he was becoming a bit bratty that he didn’t get to be in any of the action. Jack pulled your body back, the two of you falling on the bed before he elevated your body to fit right between his legs, your back reclining on his chest. Jack padded his fingers along your stomach just before going to touch your lower lips. The temperature change from Trevor’s warm mouth to Jack’s cold fingers contrasting greatly. Starting off at a normal pace but quickly picking it up, Jack was determined to make you feel better than Trevor could.

“C’mon princess, I know you feel it, let it out,” he smirked. Knowing last time Trevor didn’t truly get the full Y/n experience. Trevor just quizzically looked, what the hell did Jack mean? Anyways, Trevor was focused on you, watching how your body reacted to the brash touch. Your toes curling up, your legs twitching. Trevor made his way up your legs, planting kisses from the tops of your feet all the way up to your thighs.

At this time Jack had both hands playing with your princess parts, his dominant hand gliding in and out of you as his other toyed with your clit. With all of this touch you were getting overstimulated, and fully well knew what Jack meant from that statement. You felt the buildup in your lower stomach, and it was getting to the point where you couldn’t contain yourself.

“Oh my fuck, I’m gonna– I’m gonna,” you breathlessly tried to get out before you squirted, Jack pulling his fingers out at the right time as you ejaculated juices that covered the bed sheets, and subsequently got a bit on Trevor as well.

“No fucking way, did you just-,” Trevor gaped in awe. Throughout his multitude of bodies he had never once met a girl who could squirt, only seeing it in videos.

“Mmhmm, just gotta play with her in all the right ways and she’s your own little waterfall,” Jack smugly boasted, proud of himself that at least he was the only one who could get you like that.

You turned around, now on your knees as you kissed Jack intensely, “I think baby deserves a treat for himself now huh,” you lowered yourself down his body, peppering kisses as you made your way to his dick. Swirling your tongue around the tip and head, you then took his full member in your mouth and started to bob up and down.

Your ass stuck out in the air vulnerably, Trevor smacked it, surely leaving a hand print, before diving in and eating it from the back. This took you by surprise, making you lurch forward and causing you to take more of Jack in your mouth.

“I think she needs to be stuffed from both ends, huh Jack,” Trevor grunted, now wanting—no, needing– to bury himself deep inside your walls. Too preoccupied with getting deepthroated, Jack just nodded and groaned out what sounded like a grumble of a yes.

Trevor pulled down his shorts, his dick now throbbing from how hard it had been this whole time. He rubbed the head from the fore and aft of your vagina before easily sliding it in.

“Is’so slick and wet. Just slid right in,” Trevor softly murmured, starting off with slow measured strokes. His hand laid on your ass as he watched his dick glide in and out of you. In this moment he was awestruck, he finally was able to feel what he was only able to daydream about. He relished in the moment, knowing this would be his only chance to feel your insides.

Wanting more pressure, you backed yourself up against his cock, your plump ass bouncing as you rocked forward and backwards. Every time you moved up, your throat taking more of Jack’s dick. Trevor bit his lip, he loved the way you took initiative, but in the moment he was much more hungrier for more friction. Trevor grabbed your hips, ramming his cock in you as deep as he could. You squealed, surprised at the tempo Trevor had now started to go. Your ass was now clapping loudly against his front side. He then grabbed you by your neck, pulling you up so your back was pressed against him and your head tilted in the crook of his neck.

Trevor’s hands roamed all over your body, a squeeze to your tit, soft touches on your belly, all before his hands made their way down to your punani. He played with your folds, just embracing the slick wetness you were secreting.

“Oh my god, oh my god,” your eyes were rolling back, hands gripped to Trevor’s arms. Jack glared at the two of you, he felt like Trevor was being pretty selfish by not sharing you.

“It’s my turn,” Jack snarled, roughly pulling you down, Trevor slipping right out of you. Jack spread your legs out, aligned himself with you, and jammed himself inside. All regards were out there window, he had to make you feel just as good as Trevor did, maybe even better.

A few strokes in he brought your legs together, straightening them up and having them rest on him, making you feel tighter for him. Jack rhythmically pounded you, on arm securing your legs to its position rested on his chest, his other hand holding you by your waist. Trevor stood over you, stroking himself as he watched you scream in pleasure.

“Hey pretty girl, stroke this for me why don’t you,” Trevor lowered his bottom half to you, letting you grab his member. You pulled him closer to you, rubbing his cock as you started to lick his under shaft and balls. Trevor’s head fell back, a nice deep grunt leaving his mouth. To you it was simple things, but to him he had never had a girl do these kind of things to him. “Fuuuuuuck y/n that feels amazing.”

At that point Trev needed to feel the inside of your whatever, almost to the point of climaxing. Your mouth, your pussy, hell if he could fuck your bellybutton he would.

“Bend her over the bed, I gotta feel her I’m bouta finish,” his breaths were hitched. Jack listened, knowing after this was over he’d finally get you all to himself again and this would all be behind you three. Never have to share you again as greedy as he is.

Jack stuck your taut ass out, your elbows rested on the edge of the bed as he pushed you faced down. He smacked your ass, leaving his imprint before looking at Trevor, “Go for it brother.”

Trevor positioned himself behind you, jiggling your ass a bit before inserting himself inside you once again. Jack got in front, about to face fuck you into oblivion. With his hands planted to your hips, Trevor began to snap himself into you, a nice pace so he can ride this dream out as long as he physically could. You looked back at him, mouth agape moaning as you started to fuck him back, grinding yourself against him.

Jack didn’t appreciate himself being left out, and grabbed your face just a biiiit too forcefully, opening your jaw and jamming himself inside your moist mouth. He held your hair back, one hand under your chin as he shoved as much of himself between your lips as you can take. You started to gag, and with this your walls tightening as well. With your walls tightening with every time you choked, Trevor got closer and closer to his orgasm.

“Oh shit– I’m gonna fucken,” Trevor couldn’t even finish his statement before he swiftly pulled himself out of you and finished right on your ass. “Fuck.” Trevor looked at the mess he made on your backside, he spent all that time backed up that it coated most of your ass, dripping down the sides. Jack himself was close as well, having restrained himself not wanting to finish before Trevor, and only took a few more strokes inside your mouth before he warned you.

“Get ready baby I’m gonna cum,” he brushed your hair a bit, relief in his voice. Soon you felt his warm seed coat the inside of your mouth, with you sucking his tip to drain him. Jack pulled himself out of you, your mouth closing with a ‘pop’ as you licked your lips. You swallowed, cause Jack did not train a spitter, and opened your mouth to show Jack you swallowed every drop. “That’s my good girl.” He smiled with approval.

Trevor got himself dressed as Jack got a baby wipe to clean you up. “Well, that settles it. Y/n thank you for the great fuck, Hughes, I’m never being nosy again, see you at the lake house this weekend?” Trevor laughed, dapping Jack up.

“Of course bro, I knew this would fix you being weird. Back to normal, and I know no more crazy ass ideas from me either,” Jack brought him in for a hug.

“Yeah, for real. Imma get goin tho, practice tomorrow and let you two love birds sit in that after sex bliss, see y’all,” he pointed to you both, before exiting out of the room.

“Bye Trev!” You shouted tiredly, worn out. He waved back at you one last time before he was finally out of Jack and yours sight.

Trevor closed your front door, making sure to lock it behind him. He rested his back on the door, letting out a big sigh. That had sealed it, and had turned out just how he expected it to. Fucking you had only made his crush worse, and now he had to hide it for the rest of his life.

“What the hell am I going to do now?”

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[hyperfixatedimagines]

Home for the Holidays Ch.1

Summary: Your family didn't take your coming out well....and instead of spending the holiday alone you join your roommate for Christmas dinner. While Aemond wishes you set your sights on his sister Helaena, your tastes skew much older. 

A/N: This is a modern!au milf Alicent x milf lover f!reader. It was supposed to be finished last December lol. It got really long so I broke it into two chapters. It will be smutty, so read with caution if that’s not your thing! Not really smut in part one though. 

A/N pt. 2: In this story two of Alicent’s cousins are her older brothers and Baela is not Helaena’s cousin. Not canon compliant.

You knew the holidays were going to be rough this year but had not anticipated just how hard seeing pictures of your family in St. Barts without you would be. 

They had not taken your coming out well. 

Sure they had promised to keep paying the tuition to your very expensive university until you graduated but that did little to soothe the hurt that their disapproval caused. Your family came from old money, some of the oldest of old in the country, and with that came old ways of thinking. They didn't care that you were gay, plenty of people in your extended family were some form of fruit, but they all stayed in the closet- at least publicly. That was what your family wanted for you as well. Anything to not tarnish their image. 

But you couldn't live that way any longer. You wanted to be free. 

To your surprise, only your estranged cousin Elia had accepted and even celebrated your coming out of the closet. 

Thankfully you had Aemond. The two of you had met in freshman history class. He argued with the professor over every historical inconsistency in his lectures and it drove the professor mad. It made you laugh though. Aemond also came from old money, so the two of you bonded over the pressures that came from families that expected you to be perfect. Sophomore year the two of you moved into an apartment off campus, and your friendship only grew from there. 

Aemond was your best friend, and you could not have asked for a better one. Aemond invited you to spend the holiday with his family. He didn’t love spending time with his family as they could be quite a lot but he always went for his mother’s sake. 

You figured it beat spending Christmas alone in your flat. 

So you got dressed in your very best and sat in the passenger seat of Aemond’s Porsche the whole drive to Oldtown. 

- 

Aemond popped another piece of gum into his mouth. “This will be a great opportunity for you and Helaena to bond,” he said as he chewed. 

You rolled your eyes. “Not this again.” 

Aemond smiled mischievously. “Come on (y/n). You can’t tell me you didn’t feel a connection when she came to visit on my birthday.” 

“I can, and I am. She’s not a lesbian Aemond,” you replied.

Aemond was convinced that his sister Helaena was a lesbian. His evidence was that she never had a boyfriend, attended an all women's university, majored in Women’s studies, and only brought home girl best friends for the holidays. 

“She talked to you that night, which cannot be said for many other people. Helaena is very selective with who she talks to. You even made her laugh (y/n)! I saw the sparks,” Aemond argued. 

You sighed and shook your head. “Even if your sister was by some miracle into women, which I want to firmly state for the record that she is not, she’s simply not my type.” 

The light turned red and Aemond’s car pulled to a smooth stop at the intersection. He turned to you. 

“You don’t have a type. I’ve seen you bring all types of women home (y/n).” 

You smirked. “Ever notice they weren’t at all our age.” 

Aemond furrowed his brows. “So your type is older women?” 

You nodded. “Yeah, like your mom for example.” 

Aemond frowned. “Dude not that again!” 

You laughed. “It’s not my fault your mom is a total milf.” 

The light turned green. Aemond focused on the road once more. His face contorted in disgust. 

“Ugh, yeah you and my mother are not something I’d like to picture.” 

You let out another laugh. “Well I certainly have.” 

This time Aemond let out a small chuckle. “Do you have the hots for my mother (y/n)? Is that why you said yes to joining us for Christmas?” 

You shrugged. “Maybe I do, and maybe it is.” 

Aemond chuckled again. “Well if you can make my white, Anglo-saxon, catholic mother do anything untoward this weekend I’ll spend the first two months of the new year cleaning the bathroom every weekend.”

Another red light. The car came to a stop.

You turned to Aemond and put your hand out. 

“Deal.” 

Aemond turned to you and shook his head. “I was joking.” 

“I am not," you replied with a cheeky smile.

“Fine, deal,” Aemond said and shook your hand. 

The light turned green. Aemond sped off once more. 

You sat back in your seat thinking of Aemond’s mother, Alicent. You had only met her via Facetime when she called to check in on Aemond. 

She was a certified smokeshow. 

Alicent was beautiful and always held herself with poise. She was dressed impeccably in every photo of her online you could find when you first cyber-stalked her. 

She had lost her husband, Aemond’s father, three years ago. 

Aemond always skirted around the topic of his father. His father, from what you knew, had never really cared for Aemond and his siblings. 

Viserys Targaryen was in his second term as the state's governor when he passed away. The Targaryens were political legends in your state. Many of their family members had been mayors, governors, state senators, and they had even managed to have an ancestor in the oval office. 

Aemond’s father had always favored his only daughter from his first marriage, Rhaenyra. He had poised her to be the city’s mayor but his death led to a falling out within Aemond’s family. According to Aemond, they had never gotten along with Rhaenyra and her family but they had been cordial while Viserys lived. 

When he died, Rhaenyra (who according to Aemond saw his mother as nothing but a gold digging whore) fought Alicent on every asset Viserys owned and vowed to leave Alicent penniless. 

Thankfully Aemond’s mother had her family by her side. The Hightowers of Oldtown were an even older political force to be reckoned with. Their wealth dated back to the very founding of the nation. 

Aemond’s grandfather, Otto Hightower, had squandered his own inheritance as a young man. It was rumored his family had cut him off and left him to his own devices after he gambled his money away. So Aemond’s mother had grown up having to make a lot of things happen on her own as they didn’t have their family’s backing for most of her life. 

It wasn’t until Alicent married Viserys that the Hightowers welcomed Otto, Alicent, and her brothers back into the family fold. 

So when Viserys died Alicent had the army of Hightower family lawyers on her side. Alicent managed to win several of Viserys’ homes and the money the prenup she had signed promised her. 

Aemond never really spoke of his father, and when he did it was without warmth or love. So you often wondered if this was how all his family felt or if it was just him. You figured you would soon find out.

- 

Aemond pulled up in front of the massive estate. 

You got out of the car and marveled at the impressive family home. It wasn’t bigger than the one your family owned but it did look older and felt more imposing. 

The estate was decorated from top to bottom in Christmas decor. It was done tastefully, the lights and decor didn’t look tacky, but it certainly conveyed a love for the holiday not many others shared by the look of the estates Aemond had passed by on the drive up. 

Aemond popped the truck of the car open and took out his overnight bag. Then he took a deep breath and walked towards you. 

“Say the word and we can still go back to the flat,” he joked. 

You raised your brows and gave him a sideways look. “And do what? Eat Chinese take out and get drunk?” 

Aemond smiled. “That sounds class to me.” 

You laughed and shook your head. 

“Aemond," said a voice that sounded as sweet as honey and as light as the morning sun. 

You and Aemond turned your heads towards the estate. 

Aemond’s mother stood at the door. She smiled brightly and waved. 

Gods she’s even more beautiful in person, you thought. 

Aemond put his hand on your shoulder. “Let’s get this over with then.” 

You and Aemond walked up to the door. 

Aemond’s mother turned to you and gave you a hug. 

“It’s lovely to finally see you in person (y/n)," Alicent said as she politely embraced you. 

You were surprised but you quickly recovered and returned the embrace. You noted how warm she felt. 

“It’s a pleasure Mrs. Targaryen.” 

Alicent pulled away and waved her hand dismissively. “Oh none of that. Call me Alicent,” she said with a smile. 

You nodded. “If you insist, Alicent.” 

She let out a polite laugh then turned her attention to Aemond. She wrapped her arms around her son. “I’ve missed you so much my little dragon,” she cooed. 

Aemond blushed as he pulled away from his mother. 

“Mom,” he chided. 

Alicent laughed. “What? I can’t call you my little dragon anymore?” 

You laughed and turned to Aemond. “Little dragon?” 

Alicent turned to you. “He used to love running around pretending he was a dragon when he was a boy.” 

You reached out and pinched Aemond’s now rosy cheek. “How cute, little dragon.” 

Aemond swatted your hand away. “That only happened when I was seven and it’s because the dragon is on our family crest.” 

“If it makes you feel better my nickname used to be baby cabbage in our mother tongue," you revealed, hoping to lessen Aemond's embarrassment. 

Alicent laughed. “Why baby cabbage?” 

You blushed under her gaze. “I was a very chubby baby.” 

“How darling,” Alicent quipped. 

Butterflies fluttered in your chest at the compliment. Out of the corner of your eye you noticed Aemond staring at you. 

He cleared his throat and pulled his mother’s gaze away from you. “Let’s go inside, it’s bitterly cold out.” 

Alicent nodded. “Of course come on in. Aegon is already up in his room. Helaena and her friend should be getting in any minute now.” 

Alicent stepped aside and Aemond walked inside. 

You followed after him and felt the butterflies in your chest multiply when you caught Alicent looking you over from head to toe with a small smile on her face.

-

Aemond and Aegon decided to smoke a joint before dinner. 

You weren’t against it but didn’t care to partake so you wandered downstairs and figured you’d ask Alicent if she needed any help with dinner. 

You knocked on the wall of the kitchen entryway. 

Alicent was stirring something in the saucepan but looked up when she heard you knock. She smiled. 

Butterflies filled your chest once more. 

“Hi there,” she said. 

You shoved your hands in the pockets of your jeans. Your palms had already started to sweat and you hadn't even spoken yet. 

“Hi...Uh I was wondering if you needed help with anything?” 

Alicent waved you off. “You’re a guest (y/n). I could never ask you to do anything,” Alicent protested. 

You stepped closer and leaned against the counter next to the stove. “Then it’s a great thing I’m asking you. Really, I want to help out,” you insisted. 

Alicent let out a small laugh. “Okay, you can stir this gravy while I check on the roast.” 

You stepped up to the stove and took over the stirring. 

Alicent went to the oven that was inlaid on the side of the stove, and took a look at the roast.   

“Did you decorate or did you hire someone to decorate your home?” 

Alicent stuck a meat thermometer in the roast and turned her head towards you. “Depends, do you think it’s too much?” 

You smiled. “Of course not. It’s beautifully done.” 

Alicent brightened at the compliment. “Then it was all me,” she beamed. 

“Do you always go all out on the holidays?” 

Alicent placed the roast back on its rack and closed the oven door. “Just Christmas. It’s my favorite holiday because I finally have my family all under one roof again." 

She took her oven mitts off. 

You continued to stir the gravy. “Well I hope it’s okay that you have a stray joining you at the table this year." 

Alicent approached the stove once more.“It’s Christmas, the more the merrier.” 

Then Alicent reached out for the spoon. You went to hand it off. 

But then your hand met hers. 

You didn’t move, and neither did Alicent. 

She met your gaze. 

You were too scared to even breathe. It felt as though if you moved even an inch the spell that kept her eyes on you would break. 

But it broke anyway. 

Alicent cleared her throat and looked away. 

You let go of the spoon. 

Alicent grabbed the spoon and resumed stirring. With her free hand she lowered the heat of the flame. “Besides, I’ll have two stays. Helaena is bringing a friend from school," she said, as though your brief moment of intense something had never happened. 

You took a step back and leaned on the counter. “Right, you mentioned that before. Do you know much about her?” 

Alicent continued to stir. She did not meet your gaze. “Not really. Helaena doesn’t share much about her college life with me. All I know is that her name is Baela, and that they’re spending Christmas day with her family.” 

You raised your eyebrows slightly. Was Aemond right about his sister being into women? 

Alicent noticed. “Why’d you make that face?” 

“Oh, it’s nothing. It’s just something stupid Aemond said," your face suddenly felt warmer. 

Now it was Alicent who raised her eyebrows in intrigue. “What is it?” 

You bit the inside of your cheek, unsure if Aemond would mind you sharing his thoughts with his mother. 

Alicent noted your apprehension. “I won’t tell Aemond you mentioned anything.” 

You looked into Alicent’s eyes. They were a deep and rich brown. They were comforting. You realized that with eyes like that you would tell her anything she wanted. But her gaze was too hot so you swallowed hard and looked away from her when you told her what Aemond had said. 

“He thinks Helaena is gay, and is obsessed with getting her and I together. I’m ninety percent sure that’s the sole reason he invited me over today.” 

Alicent stopped stirring and stared at you.“Gay? Why does he think Helaena is gay?” 

You shrugged. 

Alicent placed a hand on her hip. "I think you do know." 

You dared look up. Alicent's attention was fully focused on you. You felt your stomach in your throat but you spoke anyway.

“According to Aemond, Helaena never expresses interest in men or in dating a man, only talks about women she admires, attends a historically women’s college and majors in women’s studies, and finally that she only ever brings girls home on the holidays.” 

Alicent chuckled and went back to stirring the gravy. “Oh gods. You know I’ve never known why kids today still hang onto outdated stereotypes about sexuality. I was the very same at Helaena’s age, she’ll grow out of it when she meets her future husband. I know I did.” 

You pushed yourself onto the counter and sat down, intrigued at the revelation of Alicent's past. 

“You were a women’s studies major at an all girl college?” 

Alicent tilted her head to the side.“Sort of. I majored in English literature at Vassar, and I only ever brought my girl friends home for the holidays. Until I met my late husband of course.” 

Aemond had never told you that his mother had gone to an all women’s university or that she had a BA in English Lit. It piqued your interest. You needed to know more. 

“How did you meet him?” 

Alicent returned her gaze to the stove and brought the heat of the burner even lower. “My father introduced us. He was Viserys’ chief of staff in his first term.” 

You knew there had been an age difference between them but had not imagined it was that big. 

“Interesting...”

Alicent didn’t reply but she glanced over at you. 

You hopped off the counter, awkward with the sudden silence. “What else can I help with?” 

Alicent smiled softly. “You really don’t have to (y/n).” 

You shook your head. “I insist. Have you set the table? If not I would be more than happy to do so.” 

Alicent turned the heat off and moved the sauce pot to a different burner. She looked up at you. “I laid everything out but I haven’t set it up.” 

You clapped your hands together. “Consider it done.” 

Then you raised your hand to your forehead and gave Alicent a mock salute. 

Alicent laughed.

- 

You set the table as you had always been taught to. Spoons and knives on the right and forks on the left. 

Then, just as you were almost done setting the table you realized the salad forks were missing. 

You double checked the pile where Alicent had left everything, hoping they were under a napkin and you had simply missed them. But no dice. They weren’t there. 

So you walked back to the kitchen. 

Alicent was now working on the salad she planned to serve. She looked up when you entered the kitchen, a smile on her face. It seemed like she always had a smile ready for you. 

You smiled back, it was instinct around her. “Hey uhm- I’m almost done setting the table but I realized the salad forks are missing. I can’t find them.” 

Alicent furrowed her brow. “Really? I could have sworn I set them out with the rest.” 

She grabbed a nearby paper towel and wiped her hands of any residue. 

Then she exited the kitchen and walked towards her china hutch. 

You watched her from the kitchen entryway. 

While you waited for Alicent to find the forks you looked about the room. When you looked up you realized someone had hung mistletoe over the entryway. 

You smiled. 

Alicent walked to you, forks in hand. She stopped at the entryway. “I’m so sorry I forgot to set them out with the rest.” 

She handed the forks over to you. 

You reached out to take them and for a brief minute your hands met hers, once again. 

Your gaze met hers. “Don’t apologize. I honestly don’t know how you’re doing all the cooking and decorating all on your own. Aemond and I were barely able to put a tree up.” 

Alicent smiled. She didn’t pull away this time. “You’re too sweet (y/n).” 

You returned her smile. Your cheeks were starting to hurt but you wouldn't dare not smile back. “I do have to ask you something," you said, emboldened by the continued contact with Alicent. 

Alicent raised a brow. “Ask me something?” 

You nodded slightly then continued. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen mistletoe hung in the entryway of a kitchen before.” 

Alicent’s brow furrowed. “Mistletoe?” 

You looked up. Alicent followed your gaze. 

Her eyes widened a bit when she noticed the mistletoe. “Oh I- That Aegon,” she cursed. 

You looked back down at her and laughed. 

Alicent met your gaze once more, blush filled her cheeks. 

Then she pulled her hands away from yours. 

You took the forks and held them against you. “It's quite a funny placement isn't it?" 

Alicent walked past you, back to her salad preparations. 

“Oh yeah? How so,” Alicent replied, busying herself with her salad to avoid looking at you.

 “It reminds me of the old saying, love the meal and kiss the chef." 

Alicent stopped chopping the greens and looked over at you. She let out a small laugh. “Is that a saying? I don't think I've heard it before." 

You shrugged. “I swear I've heard it before, somewhere...Well if it's not it should be." 

Alicent shook her head, the smile still on her face. “Let’s see if you still want to kiss the chef after you’ve had my cooking.” 

Butterflies filled your chest. You stood up a little straighter. “Deal.” 

Alicent turned to you once more, her eyebrows raised. 

You twirled around and walked back to the dining room. You could feel Alicent’s eyes on you as you walked away.

- 

You finished setting the table. 

Then you stepped back and admired your work. 

You hoped Alicent would like it. So you turned to head back to the kitchen but stopped in the hall when you heard the doorbell ring. 

You turned to open it but Aemond beat you to it. 

“Sister,” Aemond said and reached out to hug a familiar blonde.

Alicent walked out of the kitchen and went to the door. 

Helaena let go of Aemond and turned to her mother. Alicent wrapped Helaena in another hug. 

Behind her, a silver haired girl stood awkwardly in the doorway. 

Helaena pulled away from her mom and stepped back to the silver haired girl’s side. She slid her hand in the girl’s. “Mom, Aemond, this is my best friend Baela.” 

Alicent stepped forward and stuck her hand out. “It’s a pleasure to meet you Baela.” 

Baela shook Alicent’s hand. “Thank you for having me over Mrs. Targaryen. Helaena has told me so much about you all.” 

Alicent laughed lightheartedly. “All good things I hope.” 

You took note that she didn’t ask Baela to call her Alicent. 

Aemond gave Baela a polite nod. “Welcome Baela.” 

Baela smiled at him. “Thank you Aemond.” 

Then Aemond noticed you standing in the hall and he waved you over. You approached them with a smile. 

Aemond went to your side and put his arm around your shoulders. “Helaena look who’s joining us tonight.” 

Helaena smiled when she turned to face you. “(y/n), it’s nice to see you again.” She stepped forward and gave you a hug. 

Aemond dropped his arm and stepped away from the both of you. 

You returned Helaena’s hug. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Aemond giving you a knowing smirk. 

Helaena pulled away and held you at arm’s length. “I’m so happy you’re joining us for dinner.” 

“As am I,” you replied. 

Helaena gave your arms a squeeze before she stepped back to Baela’s side. 

You stuck your hand out to Baela. “Nice to meet you. I’m Aemond’s friend (y/n).” 

Baela shook your hand warmly. “Nice to meet you as well.” 

Then Baela stepped back and Helaena looped her arm around Baela’s. 

“We’ll be upstairs in my room. Let us know when dinner is ready,” Helaena said before she and Baela started up the stairs. 

“Okay,” Alicent said as she watched them leave. Then she turned to you and Aemond. 

“Do you need any more help,” you asked Alicent. 

Alicent shook her head. “You’ve been a tremendous help. Please go have fun.” 

Aemond put his arm around your shoulders once more. “Let’s go play some video games on Aegon’s new system.” 

Aemond led you to the stairs. 

You craned your head back to look at Alicent. “If you need any more help just let me know! I’d be more than happy to.”

 Alicent gave you another smile. “I will.” 

Then she walked back into the kitchen and you followed Aemond up the stairs. 

- 

After about an hour of playing mario party with Aemond and Aegon (who you didn’t much care for because he could be crass but he had never been improper towards you so you didn’t mind him much) you heard the doorbell ring. 

“That will be grandfather,” Aemond said with a sigh. 

Aegon slumped down in his gaming chair on the ground. “I don’t want to go down.” 

Aemond clapped a hand on his brother’s shoulder. “Sooner we go say hello the sooner we can say goodbye.” 

Aegon groaned. 

You turned to Aemond. “Oh come on, your grandpa can’t be that bad.” 

Aegon looked at you with an incredulous expression. “You have no idea." 

Then you all stood and made your way to the entrance. 

You trailed behind the boys. 

You saw Alicent at the door with an older man who you figured was her father, and three younger men who greeted Alicent with smiles and hugs. You figured they were her brothers. 

Aemond had told you he had three uncles on his mother’s side. He hadn’t mentioned much about them other than they were all still bachelors, which to you spoke volumes about them as two looked older than Alicent and only one looked younger than her. 

The older man turned to Aegon and Aemond, who were now at the door.

 “Boys,“ the man cheered before greeting each one with a hug and heavy pat on the back. 

Aemond returned the hug while Aegon went limp in his grandfather’s arms. Then their uncles greeted each one. 

You noticed that Alicent had straightened her posture and kept a more neutral expression. She greeted her father and sibling politely, with none of the warmth of earlier greetings. 

There was a lot that you didn’t know about Alicent and her family but you figured it was not all rainbows and sunshine by the change in her demeanor.

“You got here just in time father. Dinner is ready and served,” Alicent proclaimed. 

Her father nodded. “Very good timing Alicent.” 

Then Alicent turned to Aemond. “Would you tell the girls it’s dinner time?” 

Aemond nodded. Then he sped back up the stairs. He reached you and started to tell you but you told him you had heard. 

So he left you and went to tell Helaena and Baela. 

You made your way down the staircase and to the dining room. 

Alicent’s father and brothers seated themselves. Her father sat at the head of the table and insisted Aegon sit on the other end. Aegon did not protest. 

Alicent came out of the kitchen with the salad she prepared in her arms. 

You went to her side. “Do you need any help bringing out the food?” 

Alicent gave you a half smile. “It’s alright (y/n). I’ve set it all on the table. You just sit down and enjoy.“ 

You nodded and followed Alicent into the dining room. You sat down on the empty side of the table. You introduced yourself to Alicent’s family as you sat down. They all gave you various levels of appropriate greetings. 

Thankfully Aemond, Helaena and Baela came in and sat down next to you. Aemond sat to your right, beside his grandfather, and Helaena to your left. Baela sat on her left, with Aegon on Baela’s left. Opposite you sat Alicent. To her left sat her brother Gwayne (as he had introduced himself to you), beside his father. To Alicent’s right sat her brothers Lyonel and Martyn. 

You took in the sight of the absolute feast that was before you. “This all looks delicious, Alicent,” you said without thinking. 

Alicent gave you a small smile, blush tinting her cheeks once again. “Thank you (y/n). You’re too kind.” 

Her father, Otto as you now knew him, let out an indifferent huff. “The roast looks a bit overdone. How long did you leave it in for,” he remarked. 

Alicent’s smile fell from her face. She looked down at her hands. “I followed mother’s recipe to the letter father.” 

Otto let out another huff. “We’ll see about that.” 

Alicent frowned. 

Your focus was pulled away from them when Aemond gently ribbed you with his elbow. 

“You’ve got the perfect seat to talk to Helaena,” he whispered. 

You turned your head slightly to get a better look at Helaena. She was too busy chatting with Baela to even notice you. 

You turned back to Aemond. “It’s not happening Aemond.” 

Aemond frowned then turned his attention to his grandfather.

Otto rose from his seat and tapped his wine glass with a fork, calling everyone’s attention. 

“It warms my heart to see the family gathered for another Christmas. A man’s true wealth can be measured by the strength of his family...and the strength of his business. I am pleased to announce that your uncle Ormund has set up a donor fund for Aegon’s first mayoral campaign.”

Alicent’s brothers clapped and cheered for Aegon. Alicent clapped softly and gave Aegon a sympathetic look. 

Aegon’s face turned a sickly pale color. He didn’t meet his grandfather’s gaze. 

You had a feeling this was the first Aegon was hearing of his mayoral candidacy. 

Otto raised his glass. “To Aegon, first stop the mayor of Oldtown, last stop the president’s office.” 

“Huzzah,” Martyn cheered. 

You raised your glass alongside the rest purely out of propriety. Everyone could tell by the look on Aegon’s face this was the last thing he wanted. 

You turned to look at Alicent who had guilt written all over her face. Your heart softened. 

Otto set his glass down after taking a drink. Then he grabbed the carving knife and fork and got to work on the roast. 

- 

The meal was going well. Until of course Alicent’s family set their attention towards you. 

Lyonel, Alicent’s eldest brother, turned towards you. “So (y/n), what’s your family do?” 

Martyn nodded. “Yeah your name sounds familiar.” 

You took a quick sip of your wine before you replied. “My family are mainly philanthropists now but our family used to own the majority of the railways in the country,” you confessed. 

“That’s right, (y/l/n) rail,” Otto chimed in. 

“Yes sir, but my father is focused on tech philanthropy now.” Below the table your palms started to sweat. Talking with Otto Hightower felt a lot like speaking with your grandfather as a child. They both had very imposing auras. 

“A pity,” Martyn responded as he shoveled another piece of roast into his mouth.

Alicent whipped her head towards her brother. “Martyn,” Alicent chided. 

Martyn shrugged. “What? Her family used to be major players in the nation.” 

Lyonel nodded, agreeing with his brother. But he didn’t stop there. “So why aren’t you spending Christmas with them?” 

You dug your fingers into the palms of your hands. You felt like something was stabbing the inside of your throat. 

Thankfully,  Alicent and Aemond came to your aid. “Lyonel,” Alicent reprimanded. 

Then she turned to you. “You don’t have to answer that (y/n). Please forgive my brothers.” 

Aemond nodded. “Yeah (y/n) you don’t have to engage my troublesome uncles.” 

Lyonel and Martyn rolled their eyes. 

Otto was silent but his piercing gaze remained on you. 

You swallowed hard before you put on a polite smile. You looked at Aemond then at Alicent. “It’s alright,” you assured them. 

Then you turned to Alicent’s brothers. 

“I came out to my family a few months ago and it's safe to say they don’t approve of my new ‘lifestyle’ as they call it.” 

Lyonel’s face went red. Martyn looked away. 

Internally, you smiled at the sight of them embarrassed. 

Alicent’s voice pulled you back to the present. “They’ll come around eventually (y/n). The love a parent has for their child is immeasurable.” 

You smiled at her. “I really hope you’re right.” 

Gwayne, who had not said much all dinner, cleared his throat. All eyes turned to him. 

He turned to Aemond. “So Aemond, how’s your fencing coming along?” 

And just like that the pressure was off you and onto Aemond. 

- 

Many minutes later the meal came to a close. 

The men whisked Aegon and Aemond outside to play ball, leaving only the women inside. 

You, Alicent, Helaena, and Baela cleaned up the table. 

Alicent and Baela made their way to the kitchen with the leftover food while you and Helaena stacked up a pile of dirty dishes. 

Helaena looked over at you. “That was very brave of you,” she said. 

You set the plate you had picked up down. “What was brave?” 

Helaena stopped clearing the table. She turned to face you. “Telling everyone your family iced you out after you came out. Coming out to your family is incredibly brave, and you’re even braver for sharing that with practical strangers.” 

You smiled and felt your face warm. You weren’t attracted to Helaena but she had an otherworldly presence that made any attention she gave you feel special. “Thank you Helaena.” 

She reached out and squeezed your shoulder. “If you ever need to talk or need support, I’m here for you.” 

You put your hand on top of hers. “Thank you.” 

Then the two of you finished clearing the table. 

- 

You finished bringing the last of the dirty dishes into the kitchen. 

Helaena trailed in after you and set her stack on the counter. “Mother, Baela and I will be in my room.” 

Alicent nodded, up to her elbows in leftover food that she was trying to shove into various containers. 

Baela and Helaena left the kitchen. 

You turned to Alicent. “Do you need some help with that?” 

Alicent struggled to secure the lid on the container as she had over packed it with food. Alicent shook her head. “I got it.” 

You continued to watch her struggle. “I don’t think you do.” 

Alicent stopped trying and stepped aside. “Okay then tough guy, you give it a go.” 

You smiled and walked up to the counter. You pressed the lid down on all sides until you heard it click. It was secure. 

Alicent clicked her tongue. "Lucky try." 

You turned to her. “Always happy to help.” 

Alicent took the container full of food and stacked it with the others. “You don’t have to hang around here (y/n). You can go see Aemond or Helaena.” 

You furrowed your brows. “Helaena?” 

Alicent turned to the fridge and started the game of stacking the leftovers. “Yes, I saw the two of you talking while you cleared the table. Perhaps Aemond was right after all. I’ve never seen Helaena take to someone new so quickly.” 

“You were watching us," you asked, butterflies forming at the thought of Alicent spying on you. 

“Why do you say it as if I was spying on you? I saw you from the window in the kitchen is all." She said with a lazy smile on her face. 

“Right....We were just talking. Besides,Aemond is out playing sports with your brothers and father and I am not a sports fan. And I would hate to interrupt Helaena and Baela's alone time,” you joked. 

Alicent chuckled. She turned to grab the rest of the leftovers from the counter. 

You stepped forward and grabbed them. You handed them to her, one by one. “Besides, I like being in your company,” you confessed. 

Alicent stopped arranging the leftovers and looked back at you. “Really?” 

You nodded. 

Alicent smiled shyly and returned her attention to the refrigerator. “I wish my own children felt the same. All but Aemond dodge my calls.” 

You shrugged. “If you ever need anyone to talk to, I’m always free.” 

Alicent turned to you and you handed her the final container of leftovers. “Thank you (y/n).” 

Her fingers lingered over yours. Alicent looked down at them. She stared at them for a moment before biting her lip. 

 “What’s your verdict?” 

You furrowed your brows. “I’m sorry?” 

Alicent looked up, and took the container from you. “About my food. Was it good enough to kiss the chef?” 

Your face went hot. “Oh...uhm I-” 

Alicent placed the container in the fridge then closed it. She turned back to you. 

You were still too stunned to say anything. 

So her smile fell and she shook her head. “Forget it, it was stupid.” 

“No it’s not stupid I-," you stammered then cleared your throat. “I was just caught off guard is all.” 

Alicent stared at you, not saying anything. 

So you continued. 

“The roast was cooked perfectly.” 

Her smile returned. “Thank you (y/n).” 

You stepped closer to her. “So I do believe I will kiss the chef after all.” 

Alicent swallowed hard, not taking her gaze off you. “Oh,” she whispered. 

You stood in front of her, and looked down at her lips. “May I?” 

The last thing you wanted was for Alicent to feel uncomfortable or coerced. So you waited for her reply before doing anything else. 

Alicent gave you an almost imperceptible nod. 

You leaned in, at first determined to kiss her lips, but as you neared her skin you thought better of it. 

She was just committing to the bit, you told yourself, she didn't actually want you to kiss her.

So you placed a gentle kiss on Alicent’s cheek, inches away from her lips but still in a chaste enough location. 

You noticed a small frown spread across Alicent’s lips as you pulled away. 

But it was quickly wiped away. 

Alicent blushed furiously. She looked away from you. 

You also felt your face warm. 

You heard footsteps approach the kitchen. So you stepped away from Alicent and leaned on the counter. 

Alicent must have also heard them as she busied herself with wiping down the stove top with a nearby rag. 

Aemond appeared moments later. He looked between you and his mother, slightly suspicious, but then he shook his head and turned to you. “Aegon wants another couple rounds of Deadly Fighter 5. You up for it?” 

You nodded. “Yeah, let’s go.” 

Aemond turned and headed towards the hall. 

You started after him but turned at the entryway of the kitchen. “It was a lovely meal, thank you.” 

Alicent nodded, her cheeks still rosy. “Of course.” 

Then you hurried after Aemond. 

A part of you wished you had been brave enough to kiss Alicent on the lips.

You mashed various button combinations as your chosen fighter threw punches at Aemond’s chosen character on the tv screen. 

He was currently beating you  in the second round. 

Behind you, Aegon took a hit from his bong and blew it out in perfect circles. 

“So let me get this right, you want to fuck our mom,” Aegon repeated. 

You grimaced. “Why must you say it like that?” 

Aemond’s character delivered the killing blow to you. You lost. 

Aemond turned to you. “Aegon’s crudeness aside, he’s not wrong. I’ve seen the way you linger in the kitchen alone with her.” 

You felt your face start to warm. You cleared your throat and tried your best to appear nonchalant. 

“I didn’t want her to think I was a rude guest. No one else was helping her,” you argued. 

Aegon took another hit before he spoke again. “You know, I always thought Mom was a lesbian,” he mused. 

Aemond turned to him. “You did?” 

Aegon nodded. “She never really liked Dad, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen or heard her call a man sexy.” 

Aemond furrowed his brows. “Because Dad was a dick. Mother is a devout Catholic she would never call another man sexy. I don’t even think that word is in her vocabulary.” 

You turned to Aemond. “Your arguments for why Heleana is gay are just as flimsy.” 

Aegon turned to Aemond. “You think Helaena is gay?” 

Aemond shrugged. “What else could she be? She’s definitely not into men.” 

“She’s not into anything. She’s a freak like that,” Aegon said and laughed at his own joke. 

Aemond threw a pillow at Aegon’s head. 

It bumped Aegon’s head and knocked the bong out of his hands. 

“Hey,” Aegon whined. 

You and Aemond laughed. 

- 

An hour later, the time had arrived for you to leave. 

You descended the stairs with Aegon and Aemond in tow. 

At the bottom of the stairs Alicent was already saying goodbye to her father and brothers. She finished giving each a hug goodbye. 

Then she noticed Aemond and Aegon. Alicent asked the boys to say goodbye to their grandfather and uncles. 

Aegon and Aemond did as their mother asked and gave their family a hug goodbye. 

Helaena and Baela came down the stairs and Helaena said goodbye to her grandfather and uncles. 

Once they were gone, Helaena informed her mother it was time for her and Baela to leave. 

Alicent gave Helaena a big hug. “I’ll miss you, my bug, she said as she gave Helaena a kiss on the forehead. 

Then Alicent said goodbye to Baela, another handshake. 

Baela and Helaena made their way out the door. 

You were the last guest there. 

Alicent and the boys looked towards you. 

You dialed your cousin Elia once more. Once again you got the automated message the call could not be connected.

“I’m having some trouble with my cell. Could I use your landline?” You asked. 

Aemond furrowed his brows. He turned to his mom. “Do we even have one?” 

Alicent nodded. “Of course we do.” Then she turned to you. “It’s this way.” 

She led you to a small alcove with the landline and a seat next to it at the end of the hall. 

You thanked her and dialed Elia’s number once more. 

This time you got through. It rang three times before she answered. 

“Hello?” 

“Elia, it’s (y/n). I’m calling from my friend’s landline. I couldn’t get through on my cell for some reason.” 

You pressed the phone closer to your ear. There was a lot of background noise and you could not hear Elia very well. 

“I tried to call you. I can’t make it out to pick you up. There’s been a freak snowstorm in Sunspear. They closed all the roads and aren’t letting anyone through. I’m so sorry kiddo,” Elia lamented. 

Your heart sank. 

One for the snow storm that was probably wreaking havoc in Sunspear. It was a town that almost never got anything besides sun. 

And secondly because now you had no way to get back to your flat. 

You swallowed hard before answering. “Stay safe Elia. Please call me with updates, okay?” 

“You got it kiddo. Is there anyone else who can take you  home?” 

“I’ll figure it out, Elia. Don’t worry about that,” you said. 

The line started to fade in and out. Elia wished you a safe ride home and a merry Christmas. 

You did the same then hung up. 

Then you walked back to the entryway where Alicent, Aegon and Aemond stood. 

You shoved your hands in your pockets. “Soo...a freak snowstorm hit Sunspear and Elia can’t pick me up.” 

Alicent frowned. “Oh no, is she alright?” 

You nodded. “Yeah she’s doing okay. Uhm, so I’ll try to call my family’s driver to see if he can make it out. It might take him an hour or two to drive from High Garden but I’m sure he won’t mind.” 

Alicent shook her head and approached you. “Nonsense, you’ll stay the night with us and you can leave with Aemond tomorrow evening.” 

She reached for your hands and held them. “Got it?” 

You flushed. “I couldn’t possibly bother you all like that.“ 

“You are no bother (y/n). Now come on, let me show you to the guest bedroom.” 

Then Alicent pulled you along the staircase and to the guest bedroom. 

Aemond trailed behind the two of you. 

-

Alicent led you to a beautiful room with ample space and a fireplace. She asked Aemond to start a fire as the room could get quite cold at night. 

Aemond did so without protest and soon a fire roared in the hearth. 

Then Alicent asked Aemond to fetch you a pair of his pajamas. 

Again, Aemond did so without protest. 

While Aemond was gone you turned to Alicent. “Are you sure this isn’t an imposition? I can still call the family driver.” 

Alicent waved you off. “You’re staying and that’s final. You got it?” 

You nodded. Her dominant tone ignited a flame of your own. “Thank you,” was all you could say without giving your desire away. 

Aemond returned with a fresh pair of pajamas in hand. He gave them to you. 

You thanked him. 

Alicent clapped her hands together. “Wonderful, we will leave you to get settled. Breakfast is tomorrow at 9am.” 

You nodded. “Got it.” 

Alicent reached out and gave your shoulder a light squeeze. “Sleep well,” she said. 

You smiled. “You as well.” 

Then Alicent turned and left the room. 

Aemond stepped forward. “We’ll try again with Helaena at New Years.” 

You groaned. “Please, no more of that.” 

Aemond chuckled. “We’ll see. Good night (y/n).” 

“Good night Aemond,” you replied as you shook your head. 

Aemond walked out and shut the door behind him. 

Finally, you were alone. 

You changed into the pajamas Aemond gave you and settled into the plush king sized bed. You closed your eyes and hoped sleep would come. You decided to think about Alicent, in hopes you dreamt of her. 

You smiled. 

- 

Unfortunately, sleep did not come for you. You tossed and you turned. 

All you could think of was how much fun your family was probably having without you in St. Barts. 

Then you did the worst possible thing. You grabbed your phone from the nightstand and pulled up your mother’s facebook account. 

She had already posted many photos of the family in St. Barts. They were smiling from ear to ear, tanned, and it seemed like no one cared you were not in any of the pictures. 

Your mom made no mention of your absence in the text of the post and none of the comments (mostly your mom’s pta and book club friends) asked about your whereabouts. 

You clicked through the many photos. It wasn’t until you clicked on the last photo that you lost it. 

It was a picture of your whole family (minus you), with a caption that read, “Family time is the best time. So thankful to God for allowing the whole family to join us for this Christmas getaway.” 

Tears welled in your eyes. They had completely erased you out of the family. You threw your phone across the room. 

The tears fell from your eyes and stained your cheeks. You could not stop the sobbing that followed. 

It was stupid. You were stupid. 

You should not have been crying for a family that clearly did not want you. You wiped your tears and tried to calm yourself. 

You struggled to do so but after a few minutes you were finally able to breathe normally again. 

You got out of bed and crossed the room to where you had thrown your phone. Then you picked it up. It was a little busted but nothing cracked. 

So you pocketed it and decided to go downstairs for a glass of water. 

- 

As you started towards the kitchen you noticed lights were on in the study down the opposite hall. 

Aemond had briefly mentioned the study on the initial tour he had given you. 

You wondered who else was up this late as it was well past 2am. 

So you stepped closer. As you neared the study you started to hear small cries and sobs. 

You got closer and tried to peer inside. 

Thankfully the door was ajar enough that you saw who was inside. 

It was Alicent. 

The first thing you noticed was how low cut her nightgown was. 

It was a beautiful sage green, and it hugged her body pretty tightly. Then your gaze traveled back to the low cut top of the nightgown. You knew it was wrong to stare but you wanted to take in just how stunning Alicent was. 

You looked closer and noticed her nipples peeked through the fabric of the nightgown. You swallowed hard. 

“Fuck,” you whispered. 

Then Alicent sniffled and dabbed her eyes with a handkerchief. 

You shook your head. She was clearly upset and there you were ogling her. 

You stepped back and tried to leave. 

But it was too late. 

Alicent stood from her seat. “Who’s there?” She called out. 

You didn’t reply. You were far enough away that you hoped by staying quiet she would drop it and you could leave. 

You didn’t want to intrude on a clearly private moment. 

“Come forward,” Alicent demanded. 

You silently cursed yourself. You had no choice but to enter the study.

#alicent hightower #alicent hightower x reader #alicent higtower imagine #House of the Dragon imagine #House of the Dragon reader insert

[chaithetics]

i absolutely adore your stewy fic and have re-read it 50 times already 😭😭 would love a small sequel based on the 9th episode of him supporting the reader during the funeral and butting in to defend her/hold when she breaks down without caring about what other think, im not kidding when i say i’ve read it 50 times i can’t believe i’ve found a fic this good that’s touched the part of my brain obsessed with stewy and starches it to well i adore you

Don't Let Me Go

Pairing: Stewy Hosseini x f (Roy) Reader

Word count: 2.9K

Author's note: THANK YOU SO MUCH NONNIE! I ADORE AND LOVE YOU! Every time I think about this request or read it, I'm kicking my feet and twirling my hair. This is so sweet and just the highest praise ever! WOW. I appreciate you, it was so sweet and I really hope you enjoy this! Please let me know what you think and feel free to message me! I love grief-related shows/movies (I love to be in my feels) so this was quite the interesting one. I apologise for any sadness this fic causes. I have more requests that aren't sad dw! Always open to Stewy requests as well. This can be read as a stand-alone/sequel to Furtive Hands. This also HAS NOT BEEN PROOFREAD lol. I hope you enjoy :)

Chapter/content warning: established/secret relationship, GRIEF, GRIEF, funeral, some fluff but just funeral grief and supportive Stewy.

The last week had been miserable, there was no other way to describe it or to do it justice. It should be raining, that would make sense for the funeral of such a commanding and depressing man, there also should’ve been thunder and lightning. Now that would’ve done justice for the thunderous man that your father was but maybe there was no thunder in the sky because it all left with him. 

You’re sitting in the backseat of the car with Shiv right in front of you as you wait for your brothers, both of the Roy daughters are dressed head to toe in black and a fine picture of grief. You’d gladly taken the backseat, it was worth the small risk of motion sickness, it meant it would be easier to distance yourself from any potential, yet inevitable drama. 

Shiv had a glassy expression that was hard to read, you picked up that there was something there that wasn’t just grief. You sat up a bit and leaned over closer, so your arms were resting on the back of her seat. 

“Are you okay?” You asked softly. 

Shiv’s head quickly turned to look at you, grief was there, some unshed tears in her eyes and she looked like a deer in headlights. Her lip trembled for a second and then she sighed and her blue eyes pierced yours. 

“Full disclosure…?” 

“Go.” You immediately replied and Shiv’s body moved more into your direction. 

“I really uh, fucked things up… Ken found out and Mencken, well he’s a form of stabbing a knife in return.” She breathed out and her eyes quickly left yours as she looked down at her body. “And I’m fucking pregnant, I-I told Tom and well he thought it was a fucking tactic.” She humourlessly chuckles as her eyes move to focus on the ceiling of the car. 

“Holy shit, Shiv.” You moved closer off your seat to rest your head on the top of the back of the seat dividing you two and put your hands out to hold hers, squeezing them softly and doing your best to genuinely smile for her. “I’m sorry, that’s a fucking lot. But congratulations! Congratulations? Should I be saying congratulations? If not we can go and sort it out, I’ll go with you if you want. Anything you need.” 

Shiv nodded as she kept her hand in yours and used her free hand to rub at her face a little. “I thought about it but I’m going to keep it. It’s fine. Thank you though. I’m planning to tell mom and that today so yeah.” 

“Thanks for telling me.” You responded giving her hand another squeeze and she nodded. After a few seconds, she let go of your hand and turned back around in her seat and not long after that your brothers joined you both. 

*******************

It had been an awkward car ride, you’d sunk into your seat, looking out the window as Roman and Shiv argued. You didn’t say a word, Kendall had eventually intervened and called for a truce which was agreed upon. Kendall had discussed Rava leaving the city with the kids which you thought was justified and you struggled to not call Kendall out, having to bite your tongue and fully focus your gaze on the windows. Right now was not the right time for sibling arguments. You’re sure that Kendall saw your pointed expression before looking out the window again. 

This had been tougher than you’d imagined. Roman had immediately broken during the speech, everything that hadn’t come out of him did then. Kendall had taken over, with a speech that had been well received but genuinely made you uncomfortable. Ever since you’d all sat down you’d been close to Roman, one hand gently on his back and the other hand holding his, he had a tight grip on it but he was doing slightly better now. Well, he was visibly. 

Each sentence that comes out of your sibling’s mouths feels like a blow and the casket is haunting you. Not as much as Roman though you suppose, if he wasn’t firmly planted onto the pew and with a pale, iron grip on your hands you thought you’d maybe float away. Or maybe you’d just sink down with the pressure of all the eyes, tears and smirks. 

As Shiv speaks, you know she’s right, her words about being his daughter have never been easy and it’s starting to get hot. Too hot. Sure there are hundreds of people in the church but it’s too hot even with that, you’re starting to overheat and your thoughts are overcrowding your brain. 

You look at Roman, your hand on his back and your other one holding his hand. You bite your lip, trying to force tears not to come. Unsuccessfully though. 

“I’m sorry, yeah, um I’m sorry Rome.” You let go of his hand and quickly move to squeeze past Connor and Willa in the pew. 

All of their eyes follow you in concern, you start to fidget with the corner of your sleeve while trying to regulate your breathing as you walk off to the side of the Church. You don’t know where to go, it doesn’t feel like anywhere is an option but it feels like you just need to leave. Anywhere but here, home or any place that’s ever had that title. Your mind is racing with that train of thought and another million ones, none are easier than the last though. It’s becoming overwhelming,  impossible. Your heart is beating so fast you can hear it and you can feel it beating so quickly it’s trying to carve itself out of your chest. It’s all so claustrophobic.  

An arm grabs you and you turn around to see that it’s Connor. 

“Hey, hey. Are you okay?” 

“It’s just a lot, I don’t think I can be- I don’t really want to be in here right now.” You quietly say, trying not to choke on the inevitable sobs. 

“Hey, it’s okay.” 

Connor’s gaze is focused on you and it’s gentle. Which somehow feels more intense, it amplifies the feeling of being under a microscope. You tug at your sleeve again as you feel the tears starting to get worse, you try to bite your lip as tightly as possible to stop the incoming sobs from arriving, to distract from the emotional pain with something physical. 

It doesn’t work though. 

You start to step away from Connor as your crying can now be heard, Roman stays frozen in the pew still trying to find some of his abandoned composure. Kendall’s noticed that this isn’t a toilet break and that Connor’s intervention isn’t cutting it and starts to make his way over. 

Kendall quickly realises that he’s not the only one who’s noticed and who is making their way over. Kendall’s compassion for you is still somewhat intact but today, controlling the narrative and putting out fires is his priority. 

“Stew, go. People are going to talk.” Kendall sternly whispers with a disappointed look, doing his best to communicate his point without drawing anymore attention to the scene. 

“Let them talk, I don’t fucking care Ken.” Stewy spits out with widened eyes. 

“You don’t want this story to break today, trust me.” 

“If it broke today it would drown in the rest of the funeral, Roman and the fucking GoJo numbers. You know that. Everybody does, it’s why Shiv and Matsson leaked it today.” 

“Follow the money back to your fucking seat.” 

“The money isn’t my priority here. She’s my partner.” Stewy says, Kendall scoffs and they both quietly walk over towards you and Connor. But you’ve been too overwhelmed to have noticed any of that interaction or them joining you and Connor in your weird corner towards the back of the church. 

“I need to- it’s so hot in here. It’s really fucking crowded, I know that you want a good turn out at a funeral but this is- it’s so unnecessary you know?” You cry out rambling and Connor’s concern shows more. You hadn’t publicly broken over your father’s death yet and Connor hadn’t seen you cry since you were a child. 

“Yeah, sure. Sure. A lot of people”

“It’s just so hot in here. I need cold air. Maybe some wine? Do you think there’s uh w-wine around? It’s a church, there’s bound to be wine, it’s Catholic- Holy Communion and all… Fuck.” 

“I don’t think there’s wine here you can drink.” Connor’s voice breaks a little.  

“I can’t do this, I don’t want to be in here. Connor please? Just I don’t know- I don’t fucking know.” You sob out and the tears and sobs just don’t stop. Connor puts his arms around you and does his best to keep some composure for your sake. 

Kendall and Stewy have now come over, Connor’s arms are still around you but you feel a hand on your back. One that rubs a little circle and you recognise that little pattern, the pressure, the touch itself. 

“Stewy?” You whisper out between a little sob.

“Hey, sweetheart.” His voice is soft and gentle as he continues to rub your back like he has a dozen times over the last several days. 

“I just- uh. I just, it’s so hot and claustrophobic. I needed air.” You’ve now left Connor’s arms to press yourself into Stewy’s side, his arms quickly replacing Connor’s as they wrap around you. You’re too overwhelmed to even consider or worry that your tears and makeup might be rubbing on his blazer. 

“I know.” 

Kendall is standing in an attempt to shield the rest of the world from this interaction, Connor’s hand is on your shoulder now. Stewy looks at Connor, tilting his head slightly towards you. Stewy smiles at Connor and nods, silently communicating that it’s okay and Connor can go back, which he does after squeezing your shoulder softly. 

“Can we- can- I need to go outside. I need air.” You muffle into Stewy’s side. Kendall pointedly looks at Stewy. 

“I know baby, I know. But there’s a lot of people outside still and cameras still.” Stewy says, as he rubs at your back comfortingly. Stewy isn’t worried about people seeing you both out there but about people seeing you in this state and it being immortalised in the media. 

“Fuck.” You mutter and the sobs become louder, more painful and desperate. 

You knew today would be hard, nothing was easy with your father. But you didn’t expect today to be so awful and to feel so trapped, he was gone, you shouldn’t feel like this but you just felt vulnerable, like the defenseless kid you were trapped in your childhood. Under a microscope for hundreds to zoom in on your pain, today wasn’t suffering just for your father’s amusement. 

“Yeah. We can get some air at the cemetery and take the long way back to the reception? Stop off somewhere if you want?” He asks softly. 

“We all came together-” Kendall starts. 

“I know-” Stewy quietly interjects. 

“I think I’ll go with Stewy, Ken.” You say quietly, you peek out a little from Stewy, puffy faced and wet with tears. Kendall doesn’t look super impressed at that, you can tell but he just gives a small nod.

There’s something about Stewy, his mere presence is a salve on your soul. Being buried into his side, being able to try focusing on the scent of his cologne instead of everyone and everything else is helping you remember how to breathe again. Your lungs remember how it all works again with Stewy at your side. 

“Do you want to sit down again before it ends?” Stewy gently inquires now that he’s noticed that your breathing is a bit more normal and the sobbing is more contained.  

“Sit with me?” Stewy nods. Kendall scoffs quietly but audibly and takes one of your hands and walks back to the front row pew of Roys, Stewy’s hand is gently on your back as he follows. You sit at the furthest end from Kendall, sandwiched between Willa and Stewy. Willa offers you a small but gentle smile and you press into Stewy’s side as he holds your hand in his. 

“Snot siblings.” Roman says as he finally looks at you, leaning across to give you a tissue. “Courtesy of the old Gerr-bear.” He adds as he refuses to look at the woman behind him. 

“Oh, thank you.” You whisper quietly and he nods looking away, just across from him. 

You’re aware that there’s more attention on you now over your little breakdown and at the development of Stewy coming over and then being at the front Roy children pew, Willa’s there of course but not even Tom or Rava are. You can tell Stewy’s aware of this as well as you look at his handsome side profile, he notices you staring and smiles at you, his arm around you squeezes you softly and he brings the hand of yours that he’s been holding in his lap up for a soft, sweet kiss. 

“Just breathe.” He whispers quietly as your hand in his goes back into his lap. You take a deep breathe, even consumed in your grief and the horror of this day you are so grateful for him. 

Despite the context, there is something freeing and peaceful about that. Being able to hold your hand in front of hundreds of people, kiss it and sit next to you. Stewy feels it deeply in his soul and while you perhaps can’t appreciate that right now, you can feel it too. 

****************

You didn’t stay to receive condolences like Kendall did. You immediately left with Stewy, ignoring the pointed and curious looks from everyone as he had an arm around you as you both quickly walked, he held the door open for you and you both sat in the backseat. 

As soon as you both were in and that door closed, you couldn’t help it. You just started crying. It was so overwhelming. 

“Hey, hey baby.” Stewy whispered into your hair as he pulled you tightly into him, he pressed some soft kisses to the top of your head. “I’ve got you.” He said softly. He was so soft with you today. But Stewy was always soft with you. 

Stewy held you tightly for the rest of the drive and when the car got to the cemetery you tilted your head, so you were still pressed against his chest and looked up. 

“Everybody knows now.” He wasn’t sure if it was a question or a statement, it was a fact either way. 

“Yeah-” 

“Are you okay with that? I’m sorry-” You asked quietly, letting out a little hiccup. Tears still in your eyes. 

“I don’t fucking care who knows. I love you. You baby. The whole world can know and there’s a lot going on today, I think this will be the least of anybody’s concerns or key takeaways. I just care about you.” 

You lean up to give him a soft kiss on the lips, which he eagerly but gently returns. 

“I love you too.” 

“That always helps.” He says and you let out a dry chuckle at that, as you bite your lip looking out the tinted window. “Should we try one of those exercises?” 

“Exercises? I don’t think we can fuck in your car at the cemetery when everyone is here to dispose of my dad-” You say with another dry laugh but some more tears come to stain your cheeks. 

“No, no, no baby.” Stewy chuckles and flashes you a charming smile. “Those like grounding, breathing, you’re an amazing professional ones? Oh the colour one! Um, what’s something purple you can see?” 

You look at Stewy in awe of his sweetness despite the douchey exterior most have to deal with. Your eyes briefly skim around the car and the sea of people in black outside. 

“We’re at a funeral, everyone’s wearing black… Where’s the purple Stewy?” You ask in a tone as teasing as possible but a small sob comes out of you. 

“Well you know I have nothing against outfit repeating but I’d worn a purple blazer to the wake- that wasn’t even a week ago baby. There’s a line, and it would’ve crossed the line. With the turtleneck and trousers and a purple blazer it would’ve looked like I was wearing the same outfit. I can’t do that, not in a week, let alone for two death-related events. People would know.” Stewy rambles on. 

You can’t help but laugh at his ramble, only he would be acutely aware of that and have considered this all in great detail. You laugh into his blazer and nod. He wears a large smile on his face as he notices that this seems to have cheered you up somewhat. There’s still tears but that’s to be expected, he’s just glad that there’s somehow some smiles and laughs in there as well. 

You press yourself into him tightly, inhaling his comforting scent and presence. “Don’t let me go. Not out there, in here. Ever, please.” 

“I’d never dream of it, baby..” Stewy says softly as he presses a kiss into your head and then you both leave the car holding hands.

#stewy hosseini #stewy hosseini x you #stewy hosseini imagine #stewy hosseini x reader #stewy hosseini x f reader #stewy hosseini x roy!reader #stewy hosseini fic #stewy hosseini fanfic #stewy hosseini fluff #succession #hbo succession #succession s4 #succession hbo #succession roy reader #succession fic #kendall roy #roman roy #connor roy #shiv roy #siobhan roy #arian moayed #arian moayed fanfiction #arian moayed characters #successionfanfiction #succession fandom #fanfic #teamstewy

[hannie-dul-set]

— arranged by: member (eldest to youngest) | date (latest to oldest) | type (full-length to drabbles to blurbs) i don’t recommend reading my older works because they’re terrible. still putting them on here for the sake of bookkeeping | last updated: 23.12.18 

BLUE HYDRANGEAS. wherein this time, it’s your breath that gets taken away and not the other way around.

PAIRING. lee taeyong x reader. GENRE. romance, humor, light angst, and of course the overall theme of the event  — dumbassery (this time, by y/n), florist! taeyong, contract killer! reader. WARNINGS. murder, death i mean lol, violence, swearing, mentions of blood, knives, & guns. WORD COUNT. 2.2k.

MISSED TIMINGS. drabble game; “do i look like i’ve moved on?”

PAIRING. lee taeyong x reader. GENRE. post breakup! au, angst. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 887.

CAUGHT RED HANDED. all you wanted to do was take a picture of the handsome law student during your train ride home. you did not expect things to end up like this.

PAIRING. kim doyoung x reader. GENRE. fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 804.

A FOOL’S GAME. were you the fool for being blind to his intentions? or was it he who forgot what his intentions were in the first place?

PAIRING. jung jaehyun x reader. GENRE. royal! au, drama, romance, angst, slight comedy. WARNINGS. swearing, mentions of death. WORD COUNT. 27.4k.

CONTRARIETY & CONFLUENCE. there was not an instance in your life where your judgement was proven to be mistaken— especially with regards to infatuations outside of your own. after an unpredicted introduction with a far too remarkable farm boy, you took it upon yourself to find a suitable match for him, not realizing that perhaps this time; your usual correct judgements might have been incorrect.

PAIRING. jung jaehyun x reader. GENRE. emma! au, matchmaking! au, strangers to lovers! au, slowburn, period romance, humor, one suggestive scene, very very tiny angst. WARNINGS. implied and borderline smut. WORD COUNT. 16.9k.

[doctor! au] [richkid! au] [sugardaddy! au] [bf discourse] [bf discourse]

PUT A FINGER DOWN. wherein mark lee finds you drunk for the first time and promises to himself that he should make sure that you never get wasted ever again.

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. college! au, humor, fluff, suggestive, drunken mistakes that would probably make you cry in real life. WARNINGS. swearing, alcohol consumption, mature content (sexual & explicit jokes about fingers and — u get the gist) please read at your own discretion. WORD COUNT. 1.6k.

BIBINGKA. legend says that if you finish all nine night masses of simbang gabi, your wish will be granted. mark only hopes that it’s actually true because that’s his last chance in getting you to notice him (but wait— shouldn’t his wish only come true after the nine days?)

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. christmas! au, crush! au, lots of fluff, mark is a piner, mark is also very awkward, some filipino references and customs. WARNINGS. swearing, religious themes. WORD COUNT. 6.9k.

HOW TO GET THE GUY. drabble game; “why haven’t you kissed me yet?”

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. college! au, friends to lovers! au, fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 1.2k.

IS IT BECAUSE YOU’RE ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT ME? video call with your best friend, mark lee.

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. long distance (not so relationship) relationship, mutual pining, angsty themes. WARNINGS. none. WORD COUNT. 428.

[hotsauce! au] [bf discourse] [bf discourse] [coworkers! au] 

DO YOU WANT ME (DEAD)? murder and making out.

PAIRING. huang renjun x reader. GENRE. high school! au, suggestive. WARNINGS. attempted murder, mentions of blood and self injury, veryy descriptive kissing, mc has a few screws lost, swearing, depictions of unstable behavior. WORD COUNT. 1.8k.

[friends to lovers! au] [skater! au] [skater! au] [tough love! au] [mermaid! au] [tutor! au]

I (HAVE/HAD) A CRUSH ON YOU. running into a past crush at your best friend’s birthday party wouldn’t have been so bad if he wasn’t— well— all that.

PAIRING. lee jeno x reader GENRE. crush! jeno, college! au, rom-com, mildly suggestive moments. WARNINGS. swearing, smoking, mentions of dicks and balls (sorry), an awful amount of men and boys being boys. WORD COUNT. 5.8k

I’LL TAKE YOUR WORD FOR IT AND NO ONE ELSE’S. maybe snooping through your friend’s phone wasn’t that much of a good idea. or maybe it was. either way, you didn’t regret it.

PAIRING. lee jeno x reader. GENRE. friends to something, fluff, lots of bickering. WARNINGS. swearing, invasion of privacy(?) lmao. WORD COUNT. 2.1k.

IT’S FOR YOU. all it took was the heavy rainfall from the sky to clear up your misunderstandings.

PAIRING. lee jeno x reader. GENRE. e2l (sort of), fluff. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 1.5k.

[ceo! au] [spacecore! aesthetic] [hotsauce! au] [bf discourse]

KATHANG ISIP. musings of the mind and heart are always dangerous— it’s easy to get carried away and get lost in your made up scenarios, rose colored wishes, and fleeting daydreams of what you thought would be. that is until reality hits you like the crashing of an ocean’s waves.

PAIRING. lee donghyuck x reader. GENRE. roommates! au, college! au, brief roadtrip! au, angst, fluff, humor. also let’s pretend hyuck cannot drive and that his hometown is elsewhere for the sake of plot, thanks. WARNINGS. swearing, alcohol consumption, one descriptive kissing scene, lots and lots of overthinking. WORD COUNT. 19.8k

DATING 101. drabble game; “you’re not very intimidating”.

PAIRING. lee donghyuck x reader. GENRE. highschool! au, fluff, slight suggestive, slight humore, wannabe badboy! haechan. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 678.

SHAMELESS. drabble game; “did you just— did you just kiss me?” “yeah” “do it again”.

PAIRING. lee donghyuck x reader. GENRE. enemies! au, fluff, humor, co-worker! haechan. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 997.

[grunge! aesthetic] [lipstick! au] [bf discourse]

CAN’T HANDLE THIS. how are you supposed to explain that you and na jaemin started dating just to prove each other wrong and ended up catching feelings.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. strangers to lovers, college! au, matchmaking! au, yet another richkid! au, jaemin is an asshole again, romance, humor. WARNINGS. excessive swearing, a near death experience, drinking and smoking, more than a handful of illegal shit, mentions of vomit, blood, violence, too much sexual tension it’s unhealthy, again jaemin is kind of a dick but he’s an attractive dick, jaemin also likes it when you tell him his personality is trash. WORD COUNT. 16k.

IT TAKES FOUR YEARS TO GROW A PEACH TREE. humans are fickle in nature— it takes a great deal of patience, fortitude, and devotion to have a heart that remains constant. that or having an absolute tolerance for all pain and torment that comes in exchange.

so when you are once again met by the ex-boyfriend that you’ve desperately avoided for four years after tearing up his heart, it becomes a test of how much you can endure, and how much more you’re willing to endure after realizing that you’re still in love with him when his love has already been weathered down.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader GENRE. exes to lovers! au, college! au, romance, angst, fluff, humor, hurt/comfort, SLOW AS FUCK BURN, pining, lots of pushing and pulling, the “its always been you” trope, a modern retelling-ish of jane austen’s persuasion. WARNINGS. swearing, heartbreak, alcohol consumption, parental pressure, stress and anxiety, one scene with a nosebleed, jaemin is kind of a dick in the beginning, mentions of hospitals, one scene with a creep, one makeout scene, ghosting, breakup, a lot of me projecting. WORD COUNT. currently 54k.

ARAW-ARAW. mahiwaga— someone or something that you’ll choose every single day no matter the circumstance. and for you, that was na jaemin. even if time decides to set you apart.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. childhood friends to lovers! au, college! au, romance, slow-ish burn, fluff, humor, tiny angst, biology major jaemin and art major mc HEHE. WARNINGS. excessive swearing, insecurities, some sex jokes LMAO, i project a lot in this i’m sorry JSFJG. WORD COUNT. 14.5k.

US, AGAIN. they say history repeats itself, but you’d like to disagree. you had to disagree. history changes, even if you had to force it. but when all your attempts to twist fate were met by nothing but the flashing recurrences of the past, what were you supposed to do?

or, wherein you try everything in your power to have nothing to do with na jaemin, but na jaemin wants nothing but you.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. college! au, historical! au, soulmate! au, past lives, forbidden love stuff, reincarnation, romance, drama, humor, angst, fluff, looots of flashbacks, this is an entire kdrama, very loosely inspired by the webtoon “see you in my 19th life”. WARNINGS. (updated as the series goes on) character death/s, night terrors, murder, terminal illness, hospital mentions, gun mentions, inaccurate depictions of the joseon era for the sake of plot lmao. WORD COUNT. currently 4.9k.

TOP OF THE WORLD. things had always been the same in the world of na jaemin— him sitting on a throne above everyone else. that was the natural order. but the world as jaemin knew it began to shake after a few fated encounters with someone at the bottom of the food chain.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. private school! au, one sided e2l lmao, a dash of fake dating, romance, heavily suggestive themes, lots and lots of sexual tension and power dynamics. WARNINGS. bullying (lots of it), public humiliation, mildly nsfw, borderline smut, implied smut, swearing, jaemin being a literal asshole. WORD COUNT. 15.6k.

HOSTILITY. making out with the person you hate the most.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. suggestive, stageplay! au. WARNINGS. making out, swearing, reader tells jaem to k himself, reader spits on jaem’s face and he does something…questionable. WORD COUNT. 438.

DO IT AGAIN. maybe you should have paid more attention to your boyfriend. he isn’t always petty, but he has his limits.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. fluff, established relationship! au. WARNINGS. alcohol consumption, kissing. WORD COUNT. 576.

DON’T THINK, JUST DO. an overthinker, a piece of advice, a sudden confession, and a subtle meltdown.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. high school! au, f2l, fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 1.6k.

WHAT BEST FRIENDS DO. drabble game; “i need a hug”.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. high school! au, maybe secret relationship! au, fluff, light humor. WARNINGS. swearing, mentions of food. WORD COUNT. 988.

[secret agents! au] [richkid! au] [boyfriend! au] [neighbor! au] [spiderman! au] [softcore! aesthetic] [racer! au] [vampire! au] [bf discourse] [bf discourse] [best friends to lovers! au] [reincarnation! au]

[taeil bf discourse] [johnny royal! au] [yuta punk! aesthetic] [yuta bf discourse] [kun richkid! au] [jungwoo royalcore! aesthetic] [jisung bf discourse]

NCT & WAYV MASTERLIST. © hannie-dul-set.

#only a fourth of these are good btw #masterlist

[joekeeryswife]

hello lovely! May i request a Joseph x afab reader where reader and joseph have been dating for a while but out of nowhere she gets hate from his fans (joe isnt aware) and reader wants to break up because of it? but joseph comforts her once he finds out 🥺💗

Break Up? - J.Q

hello my love! i’m writing this whilst listening to Queen #lovethem. but i hope this angst to fluff is okay! let me know how you guys found it, (kinda changed it so she’s been getting hate for a while sorry) has a few mistakes but enjoy <3

you and Joseph had been together for two years, you met on the set of Stranger Things as you were a hair and makeup stylist and somehow you guys just clicked from the day he came into your makeup trailer. you moved in together a few months ago and it was the best decision you ever made. you got to wake up to him every morning and that just allowed you guys to get closer which you didn’t think was possible. Joseph had gone out that afternoon to see a few friends and you decided to stay home, not really feeling like going out when your phone buzzed uncontrollably.

you had posted a new picture to both instagram and twitter, it was one which Joseph had taken on your date night last night and you felt really pretty so you didn’t really mind posting it. you went ‘exclusive’ with Joseph last year on your one year anniversary when he wasn’t really well known but had a few fans and at the time his fans didn’t really mind but now he was properly famous the amount of hate you got was disgusting.

these so called fans would pick apart every single thing about your appearance. how your body was, how your face looked when you smiled, how you would do your makeup. just every single thing they could find wrong with you they’d comment on leaving you with little to no self confidence. you didn’t tell Joseph, he didn’t run his social media so you didn’t have to worry about him seeing it. but in all honesty you had no idea what you had done to deserve this level of hate, there were a few nice comments scattered in the hundreds of horrible ones but the nasty ones outshined the kind ones.

you decided to look at your instagram and just look through those comments, see if maybe they’d changed their minds and decided to finally be nice but you were wrong. so very wrong. you scrolled and scrolled through the comments, tears welling up in your eyes as you read them. you wanted to look away but you couldn’t, seeing how people really viewed you just broke your heart. you never really cared about peoples opinions until now, the comments had really affected you.

‘god she is just the most ugliest thing i’ve ever seen’

‘now i’m not one to be rude but she is just disgusting’

‘why does her face look like that?’

‘how can come one as beautiful as Joseph Quinn date someone as ugly as her? i hope they don’t have kids💀’

‘her smile is so funny like why does she smile like that😭’

‘now if i was Joseph’s family i’d tell him straight, she is not good enough for him and will never be good enough for anyone.’

‘anyone in the comments telling her she’s pretty is absolutely lying, no one finds her pretty they’re telling her that to make her feel better lol’

‘girl what the hell is this, do us a favour and just delete this’

‘Joseph my love you need to get with Grace PLEASE! im begging you get away from this rat’

so many disgusting comments you could barely see with your tear filled eyes. the one last comment that caught your eye made the tears spill over. ‘why does she look like that? honestly i’m wondering how someone can look like that and wake up every morning next to Joseph. that should be Grace Van Dien not her’. you’d had enough. you chucked your phone on the sofa, hands coming up to your face as you sobbed into your hands. how can people be so cruel when you had done nothing wrong?

you couldn’t deal with it anymore. the hate and the comparing just was all too much. they were right. Joseph deserved someone better than you, you didn’t care if it was Grace or a supermodel, anyone who wasn’t you deserved Joseph more. your mind was already set, when Joseph came home you were going to end things. you couldn’t take the hate you were receiving for just existing and he did deserve someone better than you.

Joseph had no idea any of this was happening. he had seen you change recently, becoming more reserved and quiet but he thought maybe it was your time of the month and he didn’t want to impose and make you feel uncomfortable. he arrived home a lot earlier than expected, becoming bored and he just missed you. sitting on the sofa watching films whilst cuddling sounded so much better then staying out. he unlocked the front door, hearing painful sobs coming from you. he hurriedly shut the door and followed the sound of your sobs finding you on the sofa with your head in your hands.

“y/n sweetheart what’s the matter?” Joseph said, sitting down on the sofa opposite you, pulling you into his arms as your sobs grew louder. he could hear the pain and hurt in them, something awful must have happened for you to be crying like this. he’d never heard you cry as hard as this, we’ll, maybe once when you got to the end of Marley and Me but other than that never. you tried to talk but you couldn’t, to hurt from the comments.

“sweetheart calm down, take a deep breath and try relax okay? follow my breathing” he whispered, his hand running up and down your back as he tried to calm you down so he could find out what was wrong. once you had calmed down enough to talk, you pulled away but looked down at your hands, fiddling with your fingers as you tried to find the right words to tell Joseph that you couldn’t be with him anymore. as much as it pained you to do so you knew you needed to to stop getting the hate.

“i just-” you sighed, tears not stopping, Joseph watched you with a nervous look, fear filling his body. “i just think it may be best if we don’t continue this” you said, voice breaking at the end of your sentence. breaking up with him definitely hurt more than the hate comments. your whole relationship with Joseph had been beautiful, from the dates, late night cuddles, late night drives, just everything about it was perfect and breaking this off just felt like a waste.

“i- what? i’m confused.” Joseph said, heart breaking as he watched your face twist as you tried to keep your sobs at bay. “we can’t continue this relationship. i just- you deserve someone better and i think maybe you should find someone else” you said, chin quivering slightly. Joseph stared at you stunned as you played with the acrylics on your fingers. he let go of you and rubbed the hair on his chin, still confused as to where this was coming from. you had been fine this morning and now all of a sudden you want to break up? it just didn’t add up.

the room was silent except from a few sniffles and hiccups here and there from you. “y/n where is this coming from? you were fine this morning sweetheart. i need you to tell me what’s the actual matter so i know what i can do to fix it. i don’t want anyone else but you” Joseph said, turning back to you seeing a pained expression on your face. maybe you should tell him about how his fans are making you feel, he at least deserved to know that.

you got up from the chair and walked to where you had chucked your phone, unlocking it again to show him what you had been sent. you sat back down on the sofa and passed him the phone, he was even more confused now. you ushered down at the phone and then he saw it, the hundreds of comments all hating on you. he read the very few of the hundreds and his heart ached. the main ones he saw were ‘she’s just so ugly’ ‘Joseph deserves so much better than her, what about Grace?’ ‘how can come one as beautiful as Joseph Quinn date someone as ugly as her? i hope they don’t have kids💀’.

he had no idea this was even happening, his social media team had never said a word to him about it and that pissed him off. you sobbed quietly as he read through the comments, his face was filled with concern and sympathy. he turned the phone off and immediately pulled you into his chest. you were still sobbing, embarrassed from how much they had gotten to you. “alright sweetheart it’s okay. i’m not going anywhere.” he whispered, pulling you onto his lap so he could pull you closer to him. “i’d never ever leave you sweetheart. i think you’re to good for me and i don’t deserve better because you’re already the best thing y/n. i love you so much” he said, running a had through your hair.

you looked up from his neck and rubbed your eyes and sighed. “they’ve been doing it for weeks and- and it just made me feel so shit about myself and i let them get to me” you admitted, a slight blush forming on your tear stained cheeks. Joseph sighed, a sympathetic smile on his face as he looked at you. “you are the most beautiful girl i’ve ever seen. and i don’t care what others think about you and you shouldn’t either because they don’t know our relationship, they don’t know you sweetheart. you don’t need those lip fillers or surgeries, you’re a natural beauty and everyone is unique, nobody is perfect not even me, but to me you’re so perfect. the most perfect thing i’ve ever seen. so don’t listen to what those so called fans say because they’re just jealous.” he said, leaning in to kiss you passionately. you reciprocated the kiss, your tears finally stopping. even in the worst moments of your life Joseph was always there to help you through it and you definitely felt like he was your person, your soulmate.

#fanfiction #imagines #joseph quinn character #joseph quinn fluff #joseph quinn blurb #joseph quinn fanfiction #joseph quinn #joseph quinn x you #joseph quinn imagines #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn imagine #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x you #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson imagines #eddie my beloved #eddie x reader #eddie stranger things #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #stranger things cast

[unlimitedtrees]

making character sprites as a one-person indie game developer

(huh. turns out this post on cohost didnt have a “read me” section”. o well. i will put the read me section Here,  before any of da actual text. click it if u dare !!)

so, i've been meaning on making a Big post talkin all about how i actually Make my games and my processes n such ,but also ive been procrastinating on making it for so long that i thought i might as well just make One part of that post now .. and its about making the Character Sprites for my games .

So. these images are the (mostly) full sprite sheets of the three characters from my game UNITRES Dreams, taken directly from the big giant 'charactersprites.png' image that i used for nearly every sprite for Most of the game's development. some quick things to make note of: First off, Trees (the first one) was one of the earliest things i made for the game, and had their sprite sheet redone Twice since then.. this first picture doesnt contain the latest sprite sheet as the new sprites were done on aesprite and im too lazy to make a sprite sheet out of them right now.

Secondly, the Second character (the pink one), had two different designs, being completely redesigned as i didnt like their first design all too much. their redesign's animations was done in aesprite, but i made a sprite sheet out of em before so i was able to just put them here. Lastly, the Third character (the blue one with the big silly hat) remained mostly unchanged as their original sprites and design were pretty good, but they needed to be cleaned up and given better colors so i ended up polishing all of their sprites.

Anyways. it's going to be hard for me to explain my actual process, as i am Bad With Words, but i will try my best.. So. for Most of my time as a game dev, I've used Paint.NET for Everything. This includes backgrounds, tilesets, and every animation ever in all of my games. For my character sprites specifically, i usually start with making the color palette (which is a whole different process where i mess around with the RGB values until i get a specific color that i think looks pretty ... its hard to describe). When making a new character, i usaully start with an Idle animation, just so i have a good base to make all the other sprites on. I just make a sketch of the character, then i do the flat colors (as my games dont have line art), and once i have the colors i start doing the rendering , where i try to pull off a sort of Sonic CD-esque , celshaded style while Also including a bit of anti-aliasing and other modern pixel art techniques to give the sprites more Depth and make them look Sharp. Idk. it's hard to describe my process in words ... i Did make a video Years ago showing off my process, but its old and my editing in that video isnt the Greatest.

So., that's my process Lol . the only thing thats really changed is that Now i use Aesprite for making the Actual Animations , as making animations with Paint.NET is Really Difficult and Annoying , as i have No Idea how the animation will Look until it actually appears ingame .. which results in the early versions of each character's animations looking a little weird (such as Trees' first two versions, the first version of the Pink character, and the Blue character's animations.. .though the blue character isnt as bad as the other two and i kept their animations mostly the same in the final game LOL).

Something that people have kind of criticized about UNITRES Dreams' animations is that some of em dont exactly ... Look Good. a lot of animations are pretty Inconsistent , with characters like Trees having inconsistent sizes in some animations and the movement in animations such as the Pink character's walking animation and various other animations (Especially the ones made in Paint.NET) looking Unnatural.

And Well .. here's the thing about making animations and sprites for something like this. When you're the Main person making an indie game, you have Tons of different parts of the game that need to be worked on while having Very little time to work on others. On Top of making every single animation for UNITRES , i had to make every single Tileset and background for every single level, On Top of making the Level Layouts , Programming , and even making sprites for things like the UI. And you have to constantly Test the game to make sure everything works and things Look good.

So. i had very little time to work on the sprites, and i Knew this. Something you have to consider is that, not only are you making the animations for the main character , you Also have to make Tons of animations and sprites for Literally Every Other Aspect of The Game . this includes Enemies , Level Gimmicks , NPCs, And the UI .. so you end up having to work on Thousands of sprites by yourself in such a short time.

I ain't the best animator , nor the best sprite artist . But , for this game I chose an art style which is Kinda simple and comfortable for me, which made making things like tilesets and backgrounds so much easier for me. The character sprites specificially only use a few amount of colors ,but also i tried my best to give them as much depth and make them as Colorful looking as i could. Also , something you might notice is that all of the playable characters dont actually have a whole lot of animations .. each of the characters only have the Exact amount of frames and animations necessary for them to Look Good moving around the levels. Aside from a few Gimmick Specific animations that arent in the sprite sheets i posted , there arent many Extra animations or animations with Tons of Frames that i wish i could have added .. and it Kind Of Sucks . Having to split my time across Three Different Characters , i had no time to make any animations Too Crazy or Too Smooth , and i couldnt include any extra animations that could add a bit of personality to the characters ... In Fact ,the Idle "animation" isnt an animation , its just a still frame. I didnt have time to even make a simple waiting animation !!

It Is What It Is. For what its worth , Ithink Im pretty proud of the animations i did for UNITRES Dreams. while i think ive become a much better artist and animator since then, i still think some animations and some of the frames look really good ..just looking at some of the still frames is really nice .. so i think i did a good job, especially for a game that was made in 2 years and is Free. And Hey, while the animations in UNITRES Dreams may not be the best or have the most smooth animations , i Did get to experiment with making more smooth animations for TREES' ADVENTURE. while ,now, i think some stuff could use some work, i am Really Proud of how some of the animations look .. ididnt get to make Too Many extra animations (there still isnt even an Idle animation), i Did get to make some cool extra animations , such as individual animations for your Jump that are based on how fast you're moving . (the original post on cohost had a buncha gifs of da animations but im Too Fuckin Tired 2 post em here LOL !!!)

So Yea . the moral of the story: making video games is kind of hard and time consuming , Especially when you're like , the Only one working on them. just make sure to plan ahead and try not to overwork urself .. make what you can and do it when you can. Thats what i think , anyways.

#TreesThinks #UNITRES #UNITRES Dreams #art #artists on tumblr #artwork #pixel art #pixelart #pixelartist #pixel artist #game dev #gamedev #game development #game developer #indie game #indiegame #indie developer #indie game development #indiedev #indie dev

[asurrogateblog]

Cannibals, Pirates, and PhDs: How Did I Get Here?

I mentioned in some tags earlier that I’ve only actually been a real fan of Pink Floyd for under a year, and that the confluence of events that led up to it is pretty absurd. Some interest seemed to be taken in this, so I though I’d elaborate.

I didn’t know how to shorten this timeline and have it make any sense, so it’s... long. But idk, I think it’s pretty funny. If you’re nosy like I am this is for you.

My Backstory Timeline:

early childhood: my parents essentially mainline me and my little sister with The Beatles. I know almost no songs written past the 70’s until at least sixth grade. I develop a childhood crush on Paul McCartney, a joke that the universe really decides to play the long game on.

2014: my dad calls me over one night, and gravely tells me he’s been waiting to share something until I’m old enough. I brace myself to be told about sex or secret half-siblings. Instead, he tells me I need to listen to The Wall. Irritated at the idea of wasting an hour and half of my night, I nevertheless comply and go up to my room and put it on. I do not come back from this, clearly having inherited some sort of generational curse.

Around the same time, I am also secretly watching Hannibal every time my parents send me upstairs because Game of Thrones is “too gory”. This will trigger three important things: an interest in psychology, a love of horror media, and a classical music phase will train my attention span to last well past the three minute mark.

2014-2023: Over the intervening years, I become a casual fan of Pink Floyd, but make a deliberate point not to learn anything about the band. I like being able to imagine my own meanings for the songs. Also, I am motivated against this by a childhood memory of being deeply frightening by a picture of old Paul McCartney (LOL). I do not want that to ever happen again, so no learning.

Cut to April of 2023: I am finishing up my first year of my PhD program studying media psychology. I am in a bad place mentally, and am going through another horror movie phase to fill the hole. As a result, I get very into American Psycho. The main character, Patrick Bateman, is a fan of superficial 80’s pop music, particularly Genesis. I decide to start listening to Genesis to see if I agree with his tastes. While researching “best Genesis albums”, I come across The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway. I listen to it, and am blown away. I had no idea that the Phil Collins band made music like that. This sends me down the prog-rock rabbit hole. I still won't learn any lore.

Summer of 2023: MEANWHILE, I am also going through another pirate phase. I have a fairly encyclopedic knowledge of 18th century piracy (and am still quite active in the Black Sails fan community). Around this time, I get really obsessed with this one random guy named Dennis McCarthy who was hanged in 1718.

I decide to work poor Dennis into a science fiction story I’ve been working on. The premise is essentially that the universe is an abandoned simulation, and a ‘glitch in the matrix’ starts to, among other things, bring people from the wrong time periods back to life. The format of the story is vaguely monster-of-the-week, in which the characters have to solve various problems caused by mistakes in the code. I think, “hey, you know what would be perfect for this? that fanfic I wrote about The Wall in high school.” Said fic (which that stupid fucking beatles movie stole from me) is about a world in which Pink Floyd never existed, but a wannabe rock-star discovers a box full of their records and decides to copy them. While he is touring his plagiarized version of The Wall, he realizes that the events of the album are starting to happen to him in real life. By working this concept into my new story, I go through another one of my periodical The Wall phases. It's in full swing when fall rolls around.

September of 2023: This semester, I take a grad-level narrative theory class in the English department. I decide it would be helpful to follow along with a specific example, so I choose The Wall. Using the terminology I am learning in the class, I start to realize that The Wall is…. incredibly narratologically fucked up. To help orient me, I watch the bootleg concert recordings, and the trick with the surrogate band sends me so out of my mind that I decide I must break my rule about never learning band lore.

This is where the two plot-lines converge. I don’t remember which came first, but around this same time, I think to myself “hey, if Genesis was hiding such an incredible album under the 80’s pop, what must Pink Floyd be hiding?” On that whim, I put on Piper at the Gates of Dawn, which equally sends me so out of my mind that I decide I must break my rule about never learning band lore. I needed to know what the fuck happened to get them from Piper to The Wall.

September-November: In the two months between the onset of this and finally making another sideblog, I dedicate all of my free time to learning as much about Pink Floyd as humanely possible (and writing a 20 page essay for that narrative theory class). As you can imagine, this is a lot to unpack all at once for someone who didn’t even know who Roger or Syd or any of the rest of them were. Luckily, I am over-educated enough to be a very fast learner. Aside from the band lore itself, I of course also fall in love with the rest of Pink Floyd's discography musically-speaking. Having this interest to latch onto genuinely pulls me out of my depression.

Cut to February 2024: I am really enjoying myself, and want to keep this going as long as possible, but I am starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel on Pink Floyd lore. I decide I need to feed the fire by supplementing with lore from another band. The Beatles seem to have a strong fan presence on tumblr, why not revisit a childhood favorite? The universe laughs at my expense.

That about brings us up to date. I have gone through so much character development over the last eight months, it’s crazy. Pink Floyd is definitely one of those things that is less of a “phase” and more of a permanent part of my mindscape. Weirdly enough, since I am studying media psychology, all of this has also been really good for my career? I never took an interest in -real- media figures (as opposed to fictional characters) before, and I feel like I have a much clearer sense of things now. It's definitely influenced my research, so whatever domino effect this has on my future is bound to get even funnier.

Anyway, that’s my backstory!

#it’s interesting re-examining how my relationship to The Wall has changed over time. #strange how you can love something as a kid but not really personally relate to it. and then you grow up and suddenly you’re like... #...oh shit. there -must- have been a door there when I came in #// #that makes it sound less fun than its been tho #god. i've had so much fun. im actually glad i took so long to get into band lore so I could learn all this -now- #i had kind of worked myself into a (very silly) mental spiral of 'what if I've run out of new things to discover' #and it's been so. idk... healing for me to realize all of this has been here the whole time #(clenching my teeth: ....emotional vulnerability....)

[teaveetamer]

Like alright, say what you will about Fates’s story. Love it or hate it, at least we all generally agree on what the fuck happened.

No one is still discussing 3H because the story is just that Deep™️ and Good™️ that there’s always something more to find. People are still discussing 3H because people fundamentally do not agree on key aspects of the plot. And I cannot stress this enough, that’s just bad writing.

Like, can you imagine if we went the entirety of Triangle Strategy without defining whether or not the Roselle were actually oppressed or not, and that plot point was left entirely up to “how oppressed do you want them to be?” The oppression of the Roselle is not only a major aspect of one main character’s arc, it’s also a key detail for the entire conflict of the game. You cannot remove it or alter it significantly without running into some severe writing problems.

Like picture with me, for a moment, a Triangle Strategy wherein, on Frederica’s route, you discover that the Roselle have been horrifically oppressed for hundreds of years and your goal is to break them out. However on Roland’s route, because they didn’t want you to feel too bad about liking Roland, they game said “actually the Roselle aren’t that oppressed and even if they were, enslaving them is a necessity, so Roland has a point, actually. Fredrica is just overreacting.” Not only do both of those viewpoints exist within the game, the developers do nothing to develop the Roselle outside of their one appearance in either ending.

That’s basically how 3H treats the Nabateans. Their genocide at the hands of humanity is not only a key plot point, it’s the entire basis of the main character’s existence. Without it, Byleth would not exist. It should be important. But actually utilizing that or engaging with the questions it brings up would make one of the lords look bad. So the Nabateans have to live in this awkward space where they’re clearly a genocided race, the game says as much, but the game can’t focus on that too much for fear of making their main waifu less marketable. So you have Verdant Wind “my family was slaughtered by humans who drank their blood and turned their bones into gruesome weapons. Everyone and everything I ever loved was taken from me and I’ve been fighting desperately to get it back ever since” right next to Crimson Flower “lol, she’s crazy and evil, whatever, just kill her because I think she needs to be stopped” right next to Azure Moon “Rhea who? Never heard of her.”

The game can’t ever commit to one thing with her because committing to one thing with her risks making another major character come off as fundamentally unappealing (or just plain stupid, depending on which version of Rhea/worldbuilding they commit to). And then just for extra lols, the game literally gives you a library with a bunch of Alternative Facts Worldbuilding and says “idk, just pick which version you like best.” If the game can’t even agree on the basic fundamentals of a character and lore, how are we supposed to? Which is why we keep having the same goddamn arguments over and over. Not because the game is deep, but because the game can’t commit.

[another-heroine]

I Kissed a Boy and... I Have No Idea What I Had in Mind!

Have you ever thought that I would lose this opportunity? NEVER

I'd like to thank @dujour13 for trusting me her Azata boy for gay scientific purposes lol

Presenting y'all Andrine and Siavash doing bardic disgusting things below the cut

Then I asked him, “Are you sure?”

And he said, “Of course, that’s so sweet, it should not be that strong”.

And I replied, “My dear, haven’t you learned that sweet ones usually are the strongest?”

And all was fun and games until we both ended up wasted over the tavern’s roof now.

I turn my head slowly to Sia. “You know, I can’t understand why I still give ears to you.”

“It must be because we are… all ears,” he giggles.

I roll my eyes, but laugh along.

“Orange beer, who could say it ever exists?”

Siavash shrugs. “You should see my homeland. We use oranges in many recipes, even drinks.”

I cross my hands over my chest, gazing at the stars above. “Stop, you are giving me craving for things that don't exist around here. I mean, not bragging, maybe I can find some in the River Kingdoms, but that’s not the point.”

He shuts his eyes, with a scorny smile. “Of course, Your Highness.”

Suddenly we overhear a conversation below. There are two fellows more drunk than us, tipsy and sentimental towards each other.

“No, because you are my best friend!”

“No way, you are my bestest friend!”

“And you are the bestest over the bestest of all!”

Silence. Someone burps.

“Can I kiss you?”

“What? Are you out of your mind?” the second one sounds sober for a second.

I have to see it. I sit, ignoring my dizzy head. Just hope I don’t fall off the roof. Sia does the same right after me.

“But friends do it too!” The lovestruck fellow holds the other by the shoulders. “It’s just… Don’t look into their eyes! Then it’s not… uh… gay.”

Sia and I look at each other, holding our breath. We were looking for silver and got gold.

“Ok then,” the second one agrees, but not without some stiffness. “If you don’t tell everybody tomorrow, so don’t I!”

Sia says under his breath, “There they go”.

And there they went. It was the most tasteless kiss I have ever seen.

“Amateurs.” Siavash scorns and lends his torso over the elbows.

I pout. “Give them a chance. Must have been their first time ever.”

“I could do it better.”

I put my hands on my waist. “Oh, of course, Mister Professional Kisser. You got too cheeky after that beer, you know?”

“Oh, my sister-in-arts, you know what I’m talking about. We bards are full of subterfuge and charms.” He waves his hand like was talking about trivial things.”Not a big deal kissing someone who is not your type.”

I frown. “Can you give an example?”

“Like… when you have to seduce someone to get information.” His eyebrows raise, like I’ve asked for something absurd.

I ponder for a while. “Well, I’m used to enchanting them with magic. Easy peasy.”

“It does not have the same taste.”

“My boy, I’d rather die than kiss Irovetti, I swear you.” I feel my stomach twisting as I remember that bloated face. “Some people think I despise men in general, which is not entirely true. I even have friends who are,” I give a dry laugh. “But seriously, I just can’t. Every time when I had to confront one, they wanted me dead or worse, ugh.”

Suddenly I catch that familiar gleam in his eyes.For some reason my heart skips a beat, and I keep the straight face. “Ok, what now?”

“Do you wanna try?”

I’m taken aback. “Are you serious?”

Siavash shrugs. “Why not? Friends do it too,” he is amused to repeat the words we heard moments ago.

I give a crooked smile. “If Woljif finds out, I will be a dead queen.”

“What about Octavia?”

“She would join us.”

Damn, I miss my wife. But she wouldn’t mind at all, it’s true, we have an agreement towards it.

Though the picture of me kissing a man was not in the plans.

“Ok.” I get closer. “But it’s only for scientific purposes. And I truly hope that tomorrow I don’t wake up surrounded by the Family members!”

“You have my word!” He raises a hand.

Thankfully, he is not prickled. And still tastes of orange. Actually, as soon as our lips meet, I’m stormed by a myriad of sensations. And don’t ask me what kind they are.

When we get apart, I fulminate him.

“Goddammit, Sia, you are smoother than a lot of girls I’ve kissed, you prick!”

Though I give him a little push, he smiles proudly.

“You flatter me, Drine. It was good for you?”

I pretend indifference. “It would be better if you were a girl anyway. But it was not unpleasable at all. Eight of ten.”

“Eight?” His smile grows.

“Don’t get full of yourself or I will give you a seven.” I crawl off the roof. Enough of nonsense for tonight.

He asks out loud, “I was better than Octavia?”

I look over my shoulder. “Neither in one million lives!”

#“siandrine isnt real they cant hurt you” #siandrine: #i love them #glad for finally get some time to write and write about them! #mooties' ocs #mooties' crossovers #ockiss24 #pwotr pals #pathfinder wotr #pathfinder kingmaker

[milflewis]

who is sinead o’connor?

wasn’t going to answer this lol bc i’ve actually found myself feeling more about her passing than i thought i would? so apologies if this comes off a bit weird i am in a v strange place rn. btw. she converted to islam a few years ago and changed her name to shuhada sadaqat. tho she still performed under sinéad o’connor! she was an irish singer from the late eighties and was v talented. would ten out of ten recommend her music! but to me and a lot of ppl she was so much more than that.

the first time i saw a woman angry on tv it was shuhada sadaqat. it was a replaying of this video and the news station was taking the piss out of her. i was eight and i remember my grandad waking up from his nap and rolling his eyes at the screen and saying she should’ve kept her mouth shut. that he used to think she was smth worth looking at. and changing the channel to the sunday match.

she was So Angry and so so unapologetic about it. the ripping up of the pope’s picture in this video and declaring that we should fight the real enemy. was her way of talking about the systemic sex abuse that children have faced at the hands of the church for decades and how no one is properly talking about it. keep in mind this was BEFORE there was any serious investigations being done or it was being discussed openly in the media. it was not smth that was being acknowledged and any priests that were being caught were being treated as a ‘bad apple’ rather than part of a system of institutionalised abuse. she was nearly completely ostracised and blackballed. she was labelled batshit crazy and difficult and a shrew etc. you know the story. it’s always the same.

she never took it back. i remember one time where she was asked did she regret ruining her career bc the career that she could’ve had v much did get fucked by what she did and she said that it fucked up the career that ppl (her agents and etc) wanted for her. not the one that SHE wanted. that has always stuck with me.

sadaqat was also a survivor of the magdalene laundries. having been sent there for shoplifting i believe? at 18. which are a whole other story but were basically these places set up in ireland by the church and sanctioned by the government where unwed and pregnant/misbehaving and or had mental health issues girls and young women were sent to work (launder clothes and sheets etc) until they gave birth and then the child was taken from them and given up for adoption or were declared fit to return to society. there were v few records kept of who went where. a lot of children and women didn’t make it due to the conditions they were living in (corporal punishment was also not an uncommon practise used). a mass grave of nearly 800 bodies was found here in Tuam in 2017 (i think?) which caused a national scandal that has been handled and is still being handled so v fucking poorly it’s depressing. the church has yet to apologise or take proper ownership for this. neither has our government. who had at best allowed it to happen and at worst encouraged it. for context. shuhada tore up this picture in 1992. the last laundry was closed in 1996.

she spoke out about how abortion was dealt and not dealt with in this country. how we were sending people away to england to have them instead of legalising it here. an irish solution to an irish problem. she told her story about how she had them to try to normalise and create a discussion decades before it was allowed and brought into practise here.

she talked about things. this. to me. was one of the biggest things she ever did. she spoke! she refused to ignore and let it go! which in this country is pretty fucking rare rn. let alone back then. this is who she is and so much more. if you’re interested to learn more about her i would highly recommend looking her up! (she did a podcast episode with blindboy that i haven’t listened to yet but i’ve heard v good things about!) she was a pretty fucking cool person

#i didn’t have any heroes growing up and she wasn’t one of them even if i was going to have them but i think she came close? #idk . like i said. she was the first woman who i ever say being angry. that meant smth i think #shuhada sadaqat #sinéad o’connor #tw child abuse #anon tag #niamh.asks

[pourcap]

thoughts: kr chapter 11

hi! i’m alive. hope you’re all doing well :)

‘Strip her and send her to Vere as a slave?’ Damen didn’t move from the sill. Nikandros said, ‘You don’t really want that.’ ‘No,’ he said. ‘I want it to be worse.’ i get it. imagine the person you love betraying you like this. damen really had everything he held dear taken away from him within just a few hours. i can’t imagine how it must feel for him to see jokaste again after all he’s been through 

‘Put your best soldiers on her door, your most loyal, and choose them from among those who have no taste for women.' lol. smart

He knew what Veretian eyes saw when they looked at him: a barbarian in savage splendour. He did nothing to lessen the impression. He sat on the throne in armour, his thighs and arms heavy with bared muscle. i haven’t mentioned how hot i think damen is in a while, so: he’s so hot

He let him see Laurent too, let him see the picture they presented, royalty united. can’t they just rule both akielos and vere by each other’s sides???

(...) Damen liked it. He liked having Laurent beside him, liked letting the Regent’s herald see that Laurent had Akielos alongside him—had Damianos of Akielos, now in his favoured arena of war. i love them so much, and i love them working together just being a huge fuck you to the regent, and i love that all of this is the regent’s own fault for underestimating laurent and being prejudiced against damen

‘We accept the Regent’s surrender at Charcy,’ said Damen. so snarky. i love him so much.

‘No head in a bag?’ said Laurent. also very snarky. my heart hurts, though. nicaise has only really been in book 1 and i still miss him a lot :( (fuck the regent)

Laurent’s voice was mild. Relaxed on the throne, one leg extended out in front of himself, a wrist draped elegantly on the wooden arm, the shift in power was evident. He was no longer the rogue nephew, fighting alone on the border. He was a significant, newly established power, with lands and an army of his own. god i love him sooo much !!! i can’t believe one of the most cunning, insufferable and cruel protagonists i’ve ever encountered makes me so feel so soft for him. not that laurent isn’t also very sweet and caring and kind, or that his behavior isn’t understandable. he is this weird mix of really vicious and really cute. 

‘Your uncle is a good man. The Council has called for your death, but your uncle will not hear them. He will not accept the rumours that you have turned on your own people. He wants to give you the chance to prove yourself.' i haaaaaate the regent so much. soooo much. 

Laurent only regarded Estienne for a moment, before he turned his attention back to the herald. ‘‘All that is mine will be returned to me”? Were those his words? Tell me his exact words.' ??? i'm not following. what am i missing...?

well. there is no way the regent would let laurent live, even if he showed up for the trial.

‘Ride back to the Regent,’ said Damen, ‘and tell him this. All that is rightfully Laurent’s will return to him when he is King. (...) He faces Vere and Akielos united. And he will fall to our might.' soooo sexy. just. so sexy.

‘You are a patricide. You killed your own father, King Theomedes of Akielos.' honestly, kastor just annoys me. he never really does anything; never even showed up when damen was shipped off to vere, damen said he saw jokaste’s hand in every attempt to frame damen, not kastor’s, and now everything that goes on in akielos is being reported to damen by the regent’s men. even if the regent won at the end of all this, it’d be so easy for him to get rid of kastor.

With sudden double vision, Damen saw Laurent as he was, his true isolation. The Regent had done this to Laurent, had whittled away his support, had turned his people against him. He remembered trying to convince Laurent of the Regent’s benevolence in Arles, as naive as Estienne. Laurent had had a lifetime of this. sometimes i wonder how laurent managed to live through all this. his perseverance and strength are admirable, honestly. i’m pretty sure he was to nicaise what auguste was to him. 

‘I’d get a trial,’ said Laurent. ‘It’s what he wants. He wants me proven unfit. He wants the Council to ratify him as King so that he can rule with his claim wholly legitimised.' too bad that won’t ever happen <3

ugh. so jokaste is another one of the regent’s pawns.

He knew that he was not in control of himself. (...) He looked over at Laurent and said, flatly, ‘Deal with it.' i know i’ve said it before but damen and laurent as a duo are so sexy, and by now i am one-hundred percent convinced they could do anything as long as they have each other. there is so much respect and trust there, now, i can’t believe how far they’ve come.

 The extent to which she and Laurent resembled each other, in colouring, in their cool, intellectual lack of emotion, in the detachment with which they regarded one another, was both unnerving and extraordinary. they’re like ethereally beautiful horror twins

(...) ‘Damianos has sent me his bed boy. Blond, blue-eyed, and all laced up like a virgo intacta. You’re just his type.' obviously jokaste has very intimate knowledge of damen’s tastes, but i wonder if everyone in akielos just knows that their crown prince is a slut (affectionate) for gorgeous blondes. imagine everyone who has a pretty son or daughter with blonde hair showing up at the palace in hopes that damen might want to marry them.

‘I think we both know you weren’t the one fucking him. You were on your back with your legs in the air. He hasn’t changed that much.' now i want damen to bottom for laurent, just out of spite.

‘Confined?’ said Laurent. god, i love him. 

‘(...) But you and I both know that Damen does not make love like that. He took you slowly. He kissed you until you started to want it.' i mean... she’s not wrong. 

‘It’s heady, isn’t it?’ said Jokaste. ‘He was born to be a king. He’s not a stand-in, or a second choice, like you are. He rules men just by breathing. When he walks into a room, he commands it. People love him. Like they loved your brother.' i know she’s trying to provoke laurent but that’s pretty rich coming from someone who’s not even royal 

‘My dead brother,’ said Laurent helpfully. ‘Shall we now do the part where I spread for my brother’s killer? You can describe it again.' it’s so painful to think about how and why laurent can just switch his emotions off at once, to avoid being hurt. i love him so much and he makes me so sad  

Laurent said, ‘Now we are both telling the truth.' i know laurent is just looking to get a rise out of her, but it is sweet that he admitted to feeling that way about damen <3

‘You haven’t asked me about my son.' no way.

‘You have sent Damianos’s son to my uncle.' ugh. i think i really do hate jokaste.

#capri #captive prince #captiveprince #laurent #damen #damianos #damianos of akielos #damen of akielos #laurent of vere #lamen

[thelonesomequeen]

As a blog that’s been around a while…..can confirm. Lol 🧜🏻‍♀️/ I like and have been following Chris' work since his fantastic 4 days but only started to be into gossip/his personal life since the pandemic, so I really didn't follow his past relationships much (just what I read in magazines). I have to admit I liked him with Jenny, I bought the - nerdy girl gets the hot guy, that's so cute - narrative they sold but had no idea at the time that the timeline of their relationship was so shady. Since you have been here for a while and followed both Minka and Jenny eras can I ask you what are the main things you think he is doing in this relationship that he didn't do in his previous ones (besides getting married, lol)? In the people's sma interview he said that his age and experience make him a much better partner now than when he was younger. From the perspective of someone that has been following his career and personal life for a while do you think that he was being honest when he said that and didn't say it just to look good?

From the perspective of someone that has been following his career and personal life for a while do you think that he was being honest when he said that and didn't say it just to look good?

No, I don’t think he was just saying that. I do believe that’s a true statement. Not because Chris specifically said it, but because I think it’s human nature for all of us to learn from relationships and grow as we move forward into the next relationship. Even if things don’t end well, I think there’s always something to be learned. For example—I had an ex who only ever wanted to discuss important topics via text. He was awful at conversation and communication in general. I hated having big conversations via text because I couldn’t pick up on his facial expressions or mood and it made it so hard to read where he was at on some things. We got into an argument at one point and I brought it up about how we constantly had miscommunication errors because we could never have face to face conversations and that bothered me. We ended up breaking up for various reasons, but a few years down the line he actually thanked me for that moment of calling his shit out because it made him a more present partner in his next relationship going forward. Even if things end poorly, I think there’s always something to learn about yourself, what you do and don’t want out of relationships/what you’re willing to tolerate or compromise on, or just how to be a better partner in your next relationship. Chris is much older than I am and if I’ve been able to learn that lesson from my interactions, I’m sure he has as well.

As for what’s different, I think that’s hard to answer from a public standpoint because the differences are probably more noticeable in private between those who personally know him. But from what we can see, he’s willing to be public with her. Posting the photo montage and scare video montage he did of Alba was something I never expected to see from him because he had never put a significant other on his social media like that before. The best Jenny ever got was her voice in a video of Dodger. He also brought her on the Vanity Fair red carpet with him and posed at an official/big industry event. Yes, he did take a picture with Jenny at the premiere of Secret Life of Pets, but that was so low key in comparison to an Oscars after party. I also feel like while it sucks to see him disappear on social media, I feel like he’s made that change to protect the people he cares about the most from his more rabid fans by limiting their access to him. He’s not as open about his whereabouts as he used to be back when he constantly shared IG stories or pictures from his life. And his willingness to travel for Alba. I always expected when he got married, the woman would really have to mold her life around him and where he wanted to be. But he’s taken trips back and forth to Portugal with her and they’re getting their own places there, so he clearly intends to keep doing that in their own space there. I didn’t expect to see that from him because there were plenty of times with Minka and Jenny when they needed to be back in LA for things and he stayed home in MA 🦎